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Speaker 1: First day to follow up powered by the Advocates Injury

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Speaker 1: Attorneys online at adjocusla dot com.

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Speaker 2: Natalie is on the phone today and she's getting ghosted

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Speaker 2: by Ben. So we're gonna talk to her and then

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Speaker 2: a few minutes call Ben and see it feels all

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Speaker 2: us why he's ghosting her, and maybe get her another date.

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Speaker 2: But first, Natalie, how long has it beensus you her

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Speaker 2: from Ben?

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Speaker 3: Well, it's been a few a few days.

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Speaker 2: Now, just a couple of days. Are you sure you're

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Speaker 2: getting ghosted?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it's just like a weird vibe, you know, like

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Speaker 4: I just want to know what's going on.

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Speaker 1: Well, after a couple of days, I feel like, you

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Speaker 1: know you're getting ghosted if you've tried to reach out

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Speaker 1: to them a few times and then you don't respond.

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Speaker 1: Did you try to reach out to him?

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Speaker 3: I sign him a text, yeah, and I'm nothing back.

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Speaker 3: So I don't know. I don't get it.

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Speaker 1: So the vibe feels like it shifted somehow. Well, let's

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Speaker 1: talk about your date. How did that go? How did

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Speaker 1: how did you guys meet?

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Speaker 4: I mean it wasn't like, you know, a wild date

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Speaker 4: or anything. We just like went to this cute little

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Speaker 4: Italian place, and it was really little key but like

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Speaker 4: viby and I don't know, romantic and candles and all

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Speaker 4: that good stuff, you know, and conversation was awesome, which

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Speaker 4: you know isn't always the case. And yeah, okay, there

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Speaker 4: was like wine involved and all that, but you know,

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Speaker 4: it was.

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Speaker 3: It was good. I thought it was good. And I

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Speaker 3: liked that he.

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Speaker 4: Wasn't really trying to like impress me, you know, or

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Speaker 4: anything like. It wasn't like flashy or he was just grounded.

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Speaker 4: And we talked about music and like you know, wanting

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Speaker 4: to travel in our favorite shows, and it just felt real,

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Speaker 4: you know, like good and real and he seemed real,

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Speaker 4: and so yeah, I'm like into him, and I just

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Speaker 4: I don't know, I just felt like he was different.

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Speaker 2: He was different when you were on the date or

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Speaker 2: like at a certain point he got different.

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Speaker 4: No, like I feel like as a as a guy, as.

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Speaker 1: Like as in a good thing that he was different.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just like a different kind of dude, you know.

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Speaker 1: Did you feel like he was vibing with you too?

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Speaker 2: I don't know.

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Speaker 3: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: Is there anything that happened, you.

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Speaker 4: Know, we need out and okay, I felt like it

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Speaker 4: was good and I felt like, oh yeah, this could

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Speaker 4: kind of like go somewhere. I was right outside of

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Speaker 4: the restaurant, you know, felt super perfect. So I don't know,

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Speaker 4: I just he was just like this common presence. And

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Speaker 4: I've had so many dates where they're like showing off,

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Speaker 4: but like, I don't know, with him, it was just

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Speaker 4: different and I felt like I could really be myself

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Speaker 4: and like, I don't know, to be cheesy, but I

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Speaker 4: felt like really seen.

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Speaker 3: And it doesn't hurt that she's like super hot.

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Speaker 2: I mean, did anything happen on the date that was

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Speaker 2: awkward or could be a reason that you're getting ghosted?

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Speaker 4: The only thing that I can think of is like

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Speaker 4: I'm so embarrassed. Well, okay, so I kind of accidentally

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Speaker 4: invited him to.

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Speaker 3: Join me on my solo trip Greece.

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Speaker 4: How it's dinner, Like I might have gotten like a

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Speaker 4: too excited, you know, like we were just talking about

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Speaker 4: travel and I told him about this trip, and then

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Speaker 4: like I the wine was talking and I just told

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Speaker 4: him to come along and like pretend we were newlyweds and.

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Speaker 3: Get like.

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Speaker 2: We should go a Greece and said to be married,

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Speaker 2: Like you, yeah, I could see how that was you know,

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Speaker 2: but that feels like it.

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Speaker 1: Also could be like, oh, she's clearly had some wine.

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Speaker 1: This is fine.

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Speaker 2: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: But he made out with you after that or before that, after.

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Speaker 3: You know, and it was like a total joke.

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Speaker 4: Like I was like, oh, you know, like it would

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Speaker 4: be wild kind of thing, you know, but like, oh

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Speaker 4: my god, I mean, why am I already doing talking

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Speaker 4: about trips?

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Speaker 3: I don't know. And he laughed at.

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Speaker 4: The time, but like, oh, he's been totally radio silent

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Speaker 4: ever since.

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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, okay.

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Speaker 3: And I texted him and like just now it's just

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Speaker 3: you know, I just been like, oh, I hope you're

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Speaker 3: doing well. I had a great time. Would love to

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Speaker 3: see you again.

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Speaker 2: But okay, we don't have to pretending.

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Speaker 1: We don't have to pretend to be married anymore.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well, we'll see what we can figure it out

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Speaker 2: for you. We'll play a song come back, and then

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Speaker 2: call him and see if he'll tell us why he's

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Speaker 2: ghosting you and maybe get you another date. Okay, okay,

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Speaker 2: all right, we'll play a song, come back and get

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Speaker 2: your first Day follow up next. If you're just joining

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Speaker 2: us for today's First Day follow up. Natalie is on

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Speaker 2: the phone and she's getting ghosted by Ben. So we're

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Speaker 2: about to call him and see if he'll tell us

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Speaker 2: why she's ghosting him, even though we might know why.

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Speaker 2: Not sure, But Natalie, before we call him, why don't

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Speaker 2: you kind of recap what you told us?

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Speaker 4: You know, it was a great date and I kind

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Speaker 4: of maybe let the lione do for talking and told

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Speaker 4: him to come on a trip to Greece with me.

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Speaker 3: And Okay, so that might have been. Oh it sounds

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Speaker 3: so bad, all.

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Speaker 2: Right, and that's the only thing you can think of? Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Really, yeah, I guess I mean, is that.

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Speaker 1: Not Enough's the reaction polarized by it?

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Speaker 2: All right? Well, let's see. Are you ready for us

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Speaker 2: to call him?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Okay, here we go. Hi, I'm asking to Ben please

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Speaker 2: be hey Ben, how are you? This is a radio show.

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Speaker 2: It's called a Jewel Show.

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Speaker 4: Hi.

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Speaker 1: I'm Nina.

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Speaker 2: Hi, I'm Victoria, and I'm Jebel. How are you?

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Speaker 4: I'm good?

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Speaker 5: This is uh we're on the radio right now.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Have you ever listened to the show before?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? I actually.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if you've heard a first date follow

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Speaker 2: up before. But that's where if you go out on

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Speaker 2: a date with somebody and then you ghost them. That

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Speaker 2: person can email us to get you on the phone

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Speaker 2: and ask why you're ghosting them. So that's why we're

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Speaker 2: calling you today, Ben. You're ghosting somebody and they're very confused.

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Speaker 5: This must be Natalie, right, yes?

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Speaker 2: Is that right away?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Is it because she wanted to go to Greece and

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Speaker 2: get married?

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Speaker 3: I mean no, Yeah.

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Speaker 2: We talked to her and she she was worried that

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Speaker 2: the reason your ghostinger might be because she made a

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Speaker 2: joke about like coming to Greece with her on a

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Speaker 2: trip she has planned and you guys could pretend to

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Speaker 2: be newly weeds and stuff. Is that not why?

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Speaker 3: No?

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Speaker 5: No, I mean I'm I clocked that as a joke,

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Speaker 5: So that didn't.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, that wasn't it. Do you mind telling us

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Speaker 2: why you're ghosting her?

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Speaker 5: Then?

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Speaker 3: Well, I mean, okay, here's what I was. We had

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Speaker 3: a good time, Like, we had a good time. Everything

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Speaker 3: was cool, she's amazing.

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Speaker 5: I like her a lot. But something did happen that

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Speaker 5: kind of like I just couldn't deal with it.

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Speaker 3: So that's why I ghosted her. All right.

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Speaker 5: We were at the restaurant, the bartender there was somebody

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Speaker 5: that I had dated before and like, I don't mean

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Speaker 5: just date, I mean like a long term date.

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Speaker 2: Oh okay, did you know that before you went to

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Speaker 2: the restaurant?

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Speaker 5: No, no, I no, I'm not insane. That's like it's

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Speaker 5: like worst case scenario for that situation. I had no idea.

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Speaker 5: I didn't even know if she bartended, like, I don't understand.

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Speaker 5: I don't know what's going on in her life since

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Speaker 5: we broke up. But we walked in and you know,

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Speaker 5: me and Natalie, it was just like, oom, and what

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Speaker 5: are you supposed to do at that point? She's there,

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Speaker 5: she's serving us wine. I can't read anybody like I

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Speaker 5: can't read her expression, you know. So I was just

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Speaker 5: we were kind of just both pretending like we didn't

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Speaker 5: know each other, which I guess is the best case

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Speaker 5: scenario for that.

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Speaker 2: But it was awkward, yeah, I.

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Speaker 5: Mean instead of her yelling Ammy, Yeah.

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Speaker 2: It was.

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Speaker 3: It was awkward, you.

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Speaker 2: Know, awkward for you guys. But that's the reason you're

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Speaker 2: ghosting here.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 5: Well, I tried to be cool, like, you know, like

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Speaker 5: I just tried to play it off. But I was

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Speaker 5: pretty I am I was, and I am convinced that

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Speaker 5: Natalie figured it out. Like there's just no way.

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Speaker 3: She didn't because women just know these things.

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Speaker 5: They just do they always do, and I didn't want

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Speaker 5: to have to, on top of that, explain everything, and

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Speaker 5: I just want I just didn't want to get into it.

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Speaker 5: So I just needed a clean slate, and I just decided.

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Speaker 1: To shoot yourself in the foot and get out of

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Speaker 1: everything and like be all by yourself.

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Speaker 3: Basically. Yeah, I mean it.

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Speaker 1: Does sound like a super awkward situation. But when Natalie

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Speaker 1: was texting you or whatever to feel like she wanted

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Speaker 1: to confront you or something.

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Speaker 3: I wasn't sure.

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Speaker 5: I mean I think she knew, but I wasn't really

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Speaker 5: sure what she was getting at, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 3: We did make out after, you.

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Speaker 5: Know, because just things happened, but I thought it was

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Speaker 5: best to just, you know.

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Speaker 3: Act like it didn't happen and move.

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Speaker 5: On because it was just going to be like from

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Speaker 5: square one to have to deal with an X and

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Speaker 5: then how you know I did or didn't handle it.

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Speaker 3: It's just it's just too much.

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Speaker 4: But if you thought she already knew, why don't you

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Speaker 4: just say hey, like sorry for the awkwardness.

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Speaker 1: Women are a little bit more forgiving than you think,

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Speaker 1: especially with those things on a first date. Later maybe not,

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Speaker 1: but then.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, isn't it too late at that point?

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Speaker 1: I don't think so. I mean, if she didn't like it,

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Speaker 1: that would be definitely grounds for ghosting.

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Speaker 5: Yeah. I don't think I handled it the best way.

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Speaker 5: I kind of, I mean I kind of panicked, and

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Speaker 5: I just went with that decision, and then they kind

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Speaker 5: of felt like once I'd gone down.

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Speaker 3: That path, that was hard to turn back.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, Ben, Well, thank you for being honest

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Speaker 2: with us, and now I have to be honest with you.

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Speaker 2: Natalie is actually on the phone listening and wants to

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Speaker 2: talk to you.

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Speaker 1: Really.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, yep, yeah, really, I do want to talk to

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Speaker 4: you because I actually did pick up on that. Oh

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Speaker 4: and I also picked up on the fact that you

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Speaker 4: were using me as like a little pond in whatever

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Speaker 4: game the two of you are playing. I mean, you

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Speaker 4: take the place, buddy, like that was clear, and then

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Speaker 4: once you went running my text, then I knew that

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Speaker 4: that was the case.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, like, clearly you're.

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Speaker 4: Still sleeping with this girl, and I was just there

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Speaker 4: so that you could you make her jealous and you

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Speaker 4: were not responding to me, because yeah, you're right, I

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Speaker 4: wanted to confront you and you used me in this

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Speaker 4: little game, so I'm now using you in the little

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Speaker 4: game to get me the radio.

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Speaker 2: Dan, So you kind of lied to us.

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Speaker 3: A little bit.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, at.

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Speaker 3: All what happens?

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Speaker 4: And then like he's all like flirting with the bartender

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Speaker 4: and they're like pretending they don't know each other. But yeah,

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Speaker 4: I saw when she would like touch her hand or

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Speaker 4: like rub your back as she walks by you.

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Speaker 3: Clearly it was like.

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Speaker 4: I don't know if it's like a game or whatever.

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Speaker 4: He was like a rather jealous, but I don't really

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Speaker 4: want to be a part of it. Like you're not

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Speaker 4: the help.

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Speaker 3: That is not what happens. That is not what happened.

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Speaker 5: She's the one this person cheated on me, So it

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Speaker 5: wouldn't even make sense for her to be.

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Speaker 3: Flirting with me. It doesn't even make sense.

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Speaker 4: Okay, So it makes sense that you did bring me

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Speaker 4: there in front of.

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Speaker 3: Her because she cheated on you.

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Speaker 4: And then you're like, oh, ok time with the girl

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Speaker 4: and like whatever, and bake out me in front of

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Speaker 4: the restaurant.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you mete out with in front of the restaurant.

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Speaker 2: That's right.

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Speaker 3: How would I know?

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Speaker 5: How would I know the schedule? Of people's hours. How

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Speaker 5: would I even line that up? It doesn't make any sense.

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Speaker 4: You know what, It was the weekend night, and you

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Speaker 4: know she's a bartender and you know where she works.

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Speaker 3: So I'm sorry, But my guess is he didn't I didn't.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I didn't know. I didn't know.

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Speaker 2: Would you like another day when Natalie will pay for it?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? I don't.

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Speaker 4: Want another date with the bartender.

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Speaker 3: Maybe you guys to pay for that one.

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Speaker 2: All right, Well, I don't know if you got an answer, Natalie,

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Speaker 2: but you got you accomplished what she wanted to do. Okay,

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Speaker 2: all right.

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Speaker 1: This really took a lot of turns well.

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Speaker 4: What I expected, And at least I can move forward

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Speaker 4: because I knew my instincts were actually right, you know

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Speaker 4: what I mean?

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Speaker 3: Like that getting ghosted and not knowing why.

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Speaker 4: That's the So also, when I said that Ben was different,

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Speaker 4: what I meant by that is exactly the same as

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Speaker 4: every other.

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Speaker 3: It's a crisis telling you.

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Speaker 1: Jubile's first date follow up