1 00:00:03,480 --> 00:00:09,480 Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning. 2 00:00:10,800 --> 00:00:16,800 Speaker 1: This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's 3 00:00:16,840 --> 00:00:19,959 Speaker 1: tip is to let people know how you'd like to 4 00:00:20,000 --> 00:00:25,040 Speaker 1: be celebrated. This is smart in general, but in particular 5 00:00:25,120 --> 00:00:28,680 Speaker 1: as we contemplate that we won't always be around to 6 00:00:28,760 --> 00:00:32,680 Speaker 1: share our wishes, So let people know what you would 7 00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:37,480 Speaker 1: appreciate as they remember you when you still can, let 8 00:00:37,479 --> 00:00:43,000 Speaker 1: them know. This episode was inspired by the recent rather 9 00:00:43,159 --> 00:00:47,600 Speaker 1: sudden passing of a fellow choir member. She loved music 10 00:00:47,680 --> 00:00:51,400 Speaker 1: and had specific music she loved, but as no one 11 00:00:51,440 --> 00:00:55,240 Speaker 1: thought she was going anywhere anytime soon, no one knew 12 00:00:55,280 --> 00:00:58,680 Speaker 1: what music she wanted at her funeral. The topic hadn't 13 00:00:58,720 --> 00:01:02,880 Speaker 1: come up. My choir director chose beautiful music based on 14 00:01:02,960 --> 00:01:05,840 Speaker 1: what he knew of her, but he reminded the rest 15 00:01:05,880 --> 00:01:09,960 Speaker 1: of us that we really should have this conversation while 16 00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:14,560 Speaker 1: we can, so maybe you should have it too. If 17 00:01:14,600 --> 00:01:17,240 Speaker 1: you have always known that you would want a certain 18 00:01:17,360 --> 00:01:21,399 Speaker 1: song played, or a certain passage read, or a certain 19 00:01:21,400 --> 00:01:25,640 Speaker 1: person speaking at your funeral, that is not the sort 20 00:01:25,640 --> 00:01:29,399 Speaker 1: of thought to keep in your own brain. By the 21 00:01:29,440 --> 00:01:33,280 Speaker 1: time anyone is planning your funeral, you won't be able 22 00:01:33,319 --> 00:01:36,800 Speaker 1: to share that thought, or maybe you have always thought 23 00:01:36,840 --> 00:01:39,319 Speaker 1: it would be great to have your ashes scattered off 24 00:01:39,319 --> 00:01:43,160 Speaker 1: a boat. If no one else knows that, it is 25 00:01:43,280 --> 00:01:46,920 Speaker 1: quite unlikely that people will decide to do that without 26 00:01:46,959 --> 00:01:51,640 Speaker 1: your specific instructions. Maybe you even have a favorite restaurant 27 00:01:52,160 --> 00:01:54,680 Speaker 1: that you'd like people to gather at after your wake, 28 00:01:55,840 --> 00:01:58,160 Speaker 1: unless it is close to the church or funeral home, 29 00:01:58,240 --> 00:02:01,600 Speaker 1: and unless that's where people usually go, that is not 30 00:02:01,760 --> 00:02:06,120 Speaker 1: going to be an automatic assumption. So put it in 31 00:02:06,120 --> 00:02:11,000 Speaker 1: writing or tell your closest friends and family now. To 32 00:02:11,040 --> 00:02:14,000 Speaker 1: some degree, by the time people are planning your funeral, 33 00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:18,120 Speaker 1: none of this will truly matter to you, after all, 34 00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:21,800 Speaker 1: you won't be there for it, but your friends and 35 00:02:21,880 --> 00:02:25,120 Speaker 1: family will likely feel better and more certain of their 36 00:02:25,240 --> 00:02:29,080 Speaker 1: choices if they know that they are doing what you 37 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:32,880 Speaker 1: wanted them to do. They will be able to explain 38 00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:36,480 Speaker 1: things to everyone there, and they'll be able to tell 39 00:02:36,600 --> 00:02:42,120 Speaker 1: stories based on those choices, and those will help people 40 00:02:42,600 --> 00:02:47,359 Speaker 1: remember you. So if there are specific ways that you 41 00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:52,200 Speaker 1: would like to be celebrated, share these you can tell 42 00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:55,040 Speaker 1: friends and family, and if you are a member of 43 00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:57,839 Speaker 1: a house of worship, it might be good to get 44 00:02:57,840 --> 00:03:01,120 Speaker 1: these wishes on file. There as they will no doubt 45 00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:04,400 Speaker 1: be involved in all of this. I will put out 46 00:03:04,400 --> 00:03:06,760 Speaker 1: here into the world that I want to chore singing 47 00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:11,080 Speaker 1: at my funeral, ideally one that is good enough to 48 00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:16,760 Speaker 1: satisfactorily perform Herbert Howells take him Earth for cherishing. We 49 00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:19,680 Speaker 1: can just understand that they mean her in this case 50 00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:24,040 Speaker 1: instead of him. I also want an alto soloist with 51 00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:27,440 Speaker 1: a pure and lovely voice, singing the on Us Day 52 00:03:27,560 --> 00:03:31,240 Speaker 1: from Bo's B Minor Mass. If there is time, or 53 00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:34,679 Speaker 1: if the Howel's piece proves too difficult, we could throw 54 00:03:34,760 --> 00:03:38,280 Speaker 1: John Tavner's song for a theme in there. So how 55 00:03:38,320 --> 00:03:42,360 Speaker 1: about you, what would you like people to hear or experience? 56 00:03:43,680 --> 00:03:47,040 Speaker 1: If you have thoughts, don't let those thoughts go with you. 57 00:03:48,040 --> 00:03:50,480 Speaker 1: I hope you'll take this episode as a nudge to 58 00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:54,880 Speaker 1: have this conversation. And I know there are even more 59 00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:58,360 Speaker 1: important ones to have about end of life directives and 60 00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:02,000 Speaker 1: what you're including in your will and so forth. But 61 00:04:02,120 --> 00:04:04,880 Speaker 1: maybe starting with how you would like to be celebrated 62 00:04:05,560 --> 00:04:10,280 Speaker 1: will begin these conversations. And while these conversations are difficult, 63 00:04:11,240 --> 00:04:16,120 Speaker 1: they are good to have. Because the end is inevitable, 64 00:04:17,240 --> 00:04:22,120 Speaker 1: we may as well approach it mindfully. In the meantime, 65 00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:27,720 Speaker 1: this is Laura. Thanks for listening and here's to making 66 00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:37,640 Speaker 1: the most of our time. Hey, everybody, I'd love to 67 00:04:37,640 --> 00:04:40,640 Speaker 1: hear from you. You can send me your tips, your questions, 68 00:04:40,720 --> 00:04:44,480 Speaker 1: or anything else. Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook 69 00:04:44,560 --> 00:04:49,400 Speaker 1: and Instagram at Before Breakfast Pod. That's b E the 70 00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:54,080 Speaker 1: number four then Breakfast pod. You can also shoot me 71 00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:58,480 Speaker 1: an email at Before Breakfast Podcasts at iHeartMedia dot com 72 00:04:58,520 --> 00:05:01,039 Speaker 1: That Before Breakfast is spelled out with all the letters. 73 00:05:01,640 --> 00:05:03,720 Speaker 1: Thanks so much. Should I look forward to staying in touch. 74 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:13,600 Speaker 1: Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts 75 00:05:13,640 --> 00:05:18,560 Speaker 1: from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever 76 00:05:18,600 --> 00:05:25,440 Speaker 1: you listen to your favorite shows.