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Speaker 1: The Frend show is on it Stay or go. Craig

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Speaker 1: is here, Craig, good morning, welcome, Hey Craig Man. Doing

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Speaker 1: all right? How you joined? I'm I'm all right, just

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Speaker 1: all right. Well, I'm trying to be like a therapist.

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Speaker 1: You know, what's on your mind? That's what my therapist says.

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Speaker 1: Every Sauron just starts. So what's on your mind today?

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Speaker 2: What's coming up for you?

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Speaker 1: What's on your mind today? Bicycle people? Yeah, buddy, Hey,

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Speaker 1: look here, buddy, Craig, what's on your mind? What's going

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Speaker 1: on with this woman Vanessa? I pretend like I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I have your email right here, but you know, i'd

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Speaker 1: like to be inspired, I'd like to be surprised, Craig,

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Speaker 1: tell me what's going on?

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Speaker 3: Of course, So I've been dead, miss girl Vanessa get

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Speaker 3: to each other for about like four months. Everything's going

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Speaker 3: really well. I really really like her. We have a

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Speaker 3: great time together. The thing is we just like haven't

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Speaker 3: had sex.

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Speaker 1: Yet, okay in four months? Okay, hmm okay, all right,

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Speaker 1: well why would you say that's the case.

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Speaker 3: So that's the thing. I don't really know why we've

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Speaker 3: talked about it before, She says, I mean she's not

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Speaker 3: waiting for marriage, and I know she's not a virgin,

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Speaker 3: she's had sex before, but whenever it comes up, she'll say, oh, okay,

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Speaker 3: well we'll do it when I'm ready.

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Speaker 1: Okay, okay, huh hmm. So have you guys done anything?

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Speaker 1: I'm just I'm pondering this. I mean, the wheels are

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Speaker 1: spinning here? Have you done anything else?

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Speaker 3: Like?

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Speaker 1: Do you guys get to a certain point and then stop?

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Speaker 1: We don't have to be too specific. I mean are

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Speaker 1: we talking? We round? And are we round?

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Speaker 4: And?

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Speaker 1: Third?

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Speaker 3: Here?

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Speaker 1: Are we like?

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Speaker 4: Not?

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Speaker 1: I mean are we were? Second?

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Speaker 4: Like?

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Speaker 1: What are we doing?

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Speaker 3: We're I mean we're barely leaving home based, We're like

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Speaker 3: make out, but not really anything much more than that.

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Speaker 2: Have you ever seen her baby pictures?

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Speaker 1: What does that have to do with anything?

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Speaker 2: Just curious?

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Speaker 5: Have you ever heard are you saying I'm not saying anything.

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Speaker 3: I've seen if you photoed from like childhood, I don't

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Speaker 3: know about infant baby photos?

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Speaker 1: Okay, just wondering what are you suggesting that she's not

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Speaker 1: the gender?

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Speaker 2: She says, I don't know what's going on. I'm just asking.

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Speaker 1: That's all that where you're going She's hiding her gender

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Speaker 1: identity or something like that.

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Speaker 2: I never said that. You said that, Wow, have you

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Speaker 2: ever seen.

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Speaker 1: That thing?

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Speaker 2: I don't know. That's crazy.

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Speaker 1: Okay, well that's that is one possibility. Then her name

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Speaker 1: is Vince and not Vanessa. But I don't know. I

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Speaker 1: don't think so.

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Speaker 5: I'm and I'm sure he's felt around.

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Speaker 2: He barely can get the first base, not even over

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Speaker 2: the pants stuff.

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Speaker 3: I do think I would know at this point.

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Speaker 1: Okay, right now, that was okay, that was.

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Speaker 2: My friends here.

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Speaker 1: That was all out of pocket. Both of these guys

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Speaker 1: are out of pocket. I don't know that. I never

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Speaker 1: met them anyway, Craig, have you discussed this with her?

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Speaker 3: So?

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Speaker 1: I think after four months it would be fair to

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Speaker 1: say a conversation could take place where you're like, hey,

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Speaker 1: you know, where is this going? Where's the chemistry here?

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Speaker 1: You know, like what what what are your boundaries? What's

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Speaker 1: your comfort level? How do you see that? I mean

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Speaker 1: I think it's I would say after that period of time.

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Speaker 1: I mean you're calling each other girlfriend and boyfriend. I assume, right, yeah, no,

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Speaker 1: we're definitely like dating. Okay, okay, so have you man,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna ask with you, Craig. It's like it's like

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Speaker 1: it's pulling information out of your here. It's just tough.

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Speaker 1: It's like an interrogation. Okay, so it's a safe place,

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Speaker 1: so I'm not the cops. So I mean, what is

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Speaker 1: she saying when you're like, hey, I kind of want

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Speaker 1: to progress this thing physically, What does she say to you?

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Speaker 3: I mean, she really just doesn't give me any information,

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Speaker 3: that's the thing. Or she'll say like we we've talked

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Speaker 3: about it, and she'll say that when she's ready, will

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Speaker 3: absolutely have sex, but she's really not given me any

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Speaker 3: indication of when that point will be. And I don't

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Speaker 3: want to pressure her or anything, like I get it

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Speaker 3: takes time for people. It just feels like I want

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Speaker 3: to feel like I'm in an adult relationship and like

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Speaker 3: that's that's that's a part of being in a relationship.

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Speaker 3: So it just feels a little like.

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Speaker 1: Is your financial situation, Craig, What is your How are

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Speaker 1: your finances?

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Speaker 3: I mean, I have a full time job.

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Speaker 4: You're making salary a good amount of money for a

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Speaker 4: one k Yeah, you know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 2: What are you too?

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Speaker 1: You're being used? Told me a little being used for

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Speaker 1: your dollars. I'm assuming if.

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Speaker 5: She's if she's not willing to have she just brings

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Speaker 5: it up and like, oh, we're not gonna progress any further.

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Speaker 1: She's getting from somewhere. It's she might she might have

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Speaker 1: a penis, and she's using you for money. That's what

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Speaker 1: we've gotten.

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Speaker 2: She's just not ready yet.

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Speaker 1: I mean, but that's fair. But I would say if

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Speaker 1: she Craig, if she's somebody you're saying, she's had sex before,

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Speaker 1: so it's not as though she's waiting for marriage or

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Speaker 1: that it maybe it's it may or may not be

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Speaker 1: this this strong moral stance, but but yet it's not

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Speaker 1: progressing in four months with you. Like I don't think

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Speaker 1: it would be unfair to say, hey, what's going on here?

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Speaker 1: Why not me? You know what I mean? Like again,

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Speaker 1: if she were to say to you, I'm a virgin,

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Speaker 1: I'm waiting until marriage, then there's your answer right there.

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Speaker 1: Someone suggested maybe she's had some trauma. Do you know

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Speaker 1: if she's had any trauma, Not.

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Speaker 3: That anything has come up for I mean, the thought

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Speaker 3: has crossed my mind. Maybe she actually hasn't had sex

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Speaker 3: and she doesn't want to say anything.

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Speaker 1: I got to be honest, like in this day and

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Speaker 1: age with somebody who's done it before. I got to

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Speaker 1: kind of feel like maybe the chemistry's off or something,

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Speaker 1: and she likes you and doesn't necessarily not want to

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Speaker 1: be around you or with you, but like maybe you're

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Speaker 1: being friend zoned here. I really don't know. And the

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Speaker 1: fact that there's no conversation about it, and the fact

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Speaker 1: that like when you're like, she just says she's not ready. Again,

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Speaker 1: I'm not shunning her. She has every right to go

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Speaker 1: at whatever page she wants. But I also think that

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Speaker 1: if you're in a relationship with one another, then I

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Speaker 1: think that some sort of explanation as to why might

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Speaker 1: be helpful. Hey I'm waiting for this, or I don't

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Speaker 1: I won't be comfortable until here or something right, you know,

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Speaker 1: Like I just I think it's an adult conversation about

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Speaker 1: expectations and needs is reasonable, And the fact that she's

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Speaker 1: not giving you any information concerns me. And I don't

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Speaker 1: want to be the guy that's like, if she's not

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Speaker 1: doing it with you, she's doing it with somebody. But

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Speaker 1: I think she's doing it with somebody.

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Speaker 3: No, the thought has definitely across my mind that there's

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Speaker 3: somebody else and that's why.

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Speaker 1: So how much longer, Craig, are you willing to wait

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Speaker 1: with no explanation and no real sort of plan or

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Speaker 1: you know, no ability to have an expectation and not

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Speaker 1: feeling like you have all the information? Like? How much

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Speaker 1: longer are you willing to be in this relationship without

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Speaker 1: having your needs met? Because you're allowed to have needs too.

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Speaker 1: You're not allowed to pressure anybody to meet them, but

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Speaker 1: you're allowed to have needs.

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Speaker 3: Right, I mean, I think like another month at this

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Speaker 3: point without at least just like having more of an

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Speaker 3: in depth conversation. And even if there is a reason

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Speaker 3: she wants to wait, just like I would like to

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Speaker 3: be able to discuss that reason with her.

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Speaker 1: Okay, all right, fair enough, let me take some phone

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Speaker 1: calls on this, Craig. I really don't This one is

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Speaker 1: a little bit perplexing for me. But well, they have

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Speaker 1: the radio on. Let's see what people have to say.

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Speaker 1: Appreciate you, man, have a good day and good luck.

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Speaker 1: Eight five, five, five nine one one o three five. Gina,

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Speaker 1: don't enable.

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Speaker 6: Even minute you said it. I was like, girl, and

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Speaker 6: know exactly where you're going. I heard you I talk

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Speaker 6: and I'm saying that's what's going on.

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Speaker 2: Okay, we're sure.

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Speaker 1: So you're saying that she is a man?

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Speaker 6: No, what, I'll say it.

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Speaker 1: Out long swell.

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Speaker 7: I do think that's right.

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Speaker 6: I feel you.

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Speaker 1: I'm telling you so, Gina, it's impossible that she's just

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Speaker 1: not into it. She just she must have a penis. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: there's no other way. There's no other girl.

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Speaker 6: A minute, it's quite all right.

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Speaker 1: How do you wrong with that? No? No, no, it

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Speaker 1: might be false advertising, but no, no, there wouldn't be

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Speaker 1: anything wrong with that. But I think he has a

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Speaker 1: right to know at this point. But Gina, thank you

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Speaker 1: for your certainty. I appreciate you. Gina. Some other possibilities

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Speaker 1: that have been presented, perhaps she has some form of

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Speaker 1: STD and is not willing to discuss that with him

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Speaker 1: at this point, which again I think he also probably

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Speaker 1: at this point has a right to know. Again, we're

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Speaker 1: not talking about a date or two or a week

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Speaker 1: or a month. We're talking about four months. It's a

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Speaker 1: long time, and we're talking about boyfriend and girlfriend. You know,

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Speaker 1: we're talking about a relationship. And again, he doesn't get

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Speaker 1: to pressure anybody, nor does she. But I do think

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Speaker 1: that he has a right to hey, say, hey, these

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Speaker 1: are my expectations for what this relationship should look like

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Speaker 1: and what I want it to look like. How do

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Speaker 1: we get there? And for her to have just say

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Speaker 1: I will barely hold your hand speaks to either something

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Speaker 1: much more serious, a lack of chemistry another person. I mean,

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Speaker 1: it really does. So there's no world where you can

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Speaker 1: want to wait that long, but just say that. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I think you just say, like.

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Speaker 2: When she's ready, she'll do it. She's not ready.

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Speaker 1: But they don't even barely kiss.

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Speaker 2: He said that they do kiss.

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Speaker 1: He said, he's barely rounding off a home base. Yeah, oh,

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Speaker 1: she's not ready.

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Speaker 2: I don't understand, like why that's not okay? Yeah, it's

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Speaker 2: okay if you have the conversation.

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Speaker 5: I think some people want to abstain until marriage, which

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Speaker 5: is a good thing to do.

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Speaker 1: But she's she's already told him that she's been with

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Speaker 1: other men right.

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Speaker 2: Now that I wouldn't have said. I wouldn't have told

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Speaker 2: him that.

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Speaker 5: But Craig, you might be ugly send us a photo, Craig,

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Speaker 5: because that might be the issue to she might be

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Speaker 5: trying to grow to like him, like you know what I'm.

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Speaker 1: Saying, that's what I think. I like him. She likes

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Speaker 1: his money. I think he's a nice guy. Maybe and

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Speaker 1: she wants to like him for that reason, but it's

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Speaker 1: not attracted to him. That's what I think is going on.

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Speaker 1: That's what I think is going But if you could

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Speaker 1: Craig a picture of you and the baby picture of

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Speaker 1: her would be helpful. Yeah, bank accounts, show radio just

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Speaker 1: for a thorough investigation and for RUFIO a credit score

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Speaker 1: would be just because I want to be able to

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Speaker 1: provide you with the highest level of service. Hey, Reggie,

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Speaker 1: good morning. Hey, what's good Reggie? What what's going on here?

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Speaker 1: I can't wait to hear this take please?

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Speaker 7: Yeah, man, so check this out. So is using him,

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Speaker 7: you know, she uses people like that to go on

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Speaker 7: like the plate pen during the summer, you know.

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Speaker 3: Like material.

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Speaker 1: And this man is also a boat owner. Okay, now

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Speaker 1: that's a good question. We should ask him do you

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Speaker 1: own a boat? Because that would make perfect said, she's

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Speaker 1: just waiting for voting season.

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Speaker 2: It's almost everybody knows it's been.

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Speaker 1: Very cold outside and she's stalling for voting season. Perfect explanation.

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Speaker 7: And then here's the thing. Bills make for the guys

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Speaker 7: they don't want. They break rules for the guys that

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Speaker 7: they do want.

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Speaker 2: Tell us about girls.

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Speaker 1: I don't that is that wrong, though? Make rules for

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Speaker 1: the for the guys you don't like, and break rules

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Speaker 1: for the guys you do like.

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Speaker 2: Is that that's with guys that I don't want?

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Speaker 1: And I would never have some weird controlling rules.

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Speaker 2: She's been in like seven year relationship. He's saying, but.

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Speaker 1: The boat.

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Speaker 2: Everybody dreams of having a sugar daddy that you don't

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Speaker 2: have to give sugar to.

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Speaker 1: Right, right, and Reggie, Reggie, thank you man, have a

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Speaker 1: great day. I'm gonna tell you, I've been on both

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Speaker 1: sides of this. I've been the guy that other guys

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Speaker 1: have to follow the rules and I don't. I've been

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Speaker 1: the guy who gets whatever I want, and I've been

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Speaker 1: the guy who other men don't have to follow the

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Speaker 1: rules but I do. I've been on both sides of this.

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Speaker 1: I've been on yeah, I hook up with him, but

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Speaker 1: you can take me on dates. And I've also been

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Speaker 1: that he can take me on dates, but I'm hooking

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Speaker 1: up with you. I've been on both sides of this,

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Speaker 1: So I don't know that that's I don't know that

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Speaker 1: he's wrong about that.

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Speaker 2: Reggie, you ain't wrong, King, because I've.

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Speaker 1: Seen it go both ways. Hey, Corny, good morning, Welcome Cony.

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Speaker 1: A lot of theories floating around here, a lot what

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Speaker 1: are you thinking?

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Speaker 6: A lot of speculation. So I just think he needs

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Speaker 6: to have an adult conversation, if you guys, Yeah, right,

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Speaker 6: Like it seems like suck is important in a relationship.

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Speaker 6: Seems like she might have some issues with not doing

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Speaker 6: that with you right away. Have a conversation and not

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Speaker 6: just like, don't push, just let them know what you need.

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Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. And maybe she can provide a

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Speaker 1: little further insight, you know, maybe she can say, hey, look,

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Speaker 1: last in my last relationship, I waited a year or something.

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Speaker 1: I mean, maybe there's just some context here, or you know,

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Speaker 1: maybe there's more to the story that we don't know.

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Speaker 1: But I do think two grown adults who have been

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Speaker 1: intimate with other people before in a committed four month

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Speaker 1: relationship for there to be little more than handholding with

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Speaker 1: no explanation, I do think that's a little bit abnormal.

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Speaker 6: Yes, something is definitely going on, but not talking about

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Speaker 6: it is not going to fix it.

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Speaker 1: Amen, Thank you, Courtney, You have a great day now.

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Speaker 1: That is the most intelligent thing we've heard so far.

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Speaker 1: Maybe picture speaking, I would like to see them actually,

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Speaker 1: but that one, yes, I mean I would like to

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Speaker 1: see a picture of him as an adult in her

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Speaker 1: as a baby. Hey, Tyler, good morning.

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Speaker 3: How you doing?

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Speaker 1: Tyler? A lot of takes here, what's yours?

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Speaker 3: Honestly, I was thinking stay up first, I'm changing my

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Speaker 3: mind here. I believe he should leave.

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Speaker 7: She's using him.

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Speaker 1: Something is not right, And again, nobody has to do

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Speaker 1: anything they don't want to do. But I do think

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Speaker 1: you got to talk about it, and there's got to

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Speaker 1: be an explanation that makes him feel safe and confident

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Speaker 1: in what's going on here, because why are there men

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Speaker 1: but not me?

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Speaker 4: Right, I'm thinking I'm thinking the exact same thing right now.

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Speaker 1: Again, I think it would be helpful to have that

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Speaker 1: conversation and understand where her boundaries are and what her

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Speaker 1: expectations are and what her comfort level needs to be

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Speaker 1: because it is important to him and we're grown ups.

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Speaker 1: I think, Tyler, thank you man, have a good day. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'd like to see medical records. Hey, Amanda, how you doing?

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Speaker 4: I am well?

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Speaker 1: I mean, Amanda, the text today, You're on fire. In

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Speaker 1: high school, A lot of people, a lot of people

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Speaker 1: saying she's a man. Craig is gay. She knows it.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know about that. I really, Amanda,

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Speaker 1: what what say you?

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Speaker 6: I think that she's using him and he may be

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Speaker 6: her sugar daddy and she's sleeping with someone else.

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Speaker 1: Honestly, that's where my brain goes. My brain goes, if

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Speaker 1: you're not doing it with me, and you've done it before,

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Speaker 1: then who are you doing it with? And you can

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Speaker 1: You can get on me for that, but I that's

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Speaker 1: why I think, Amand I think you're onto something. Have

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Speaker 1: a good day. Thank you so much. He Jenny's is

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Speaker 1: it Denise? Okay? Bean's on fire today with the spelling.

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Speaker 1: But anyway, go right ahead, please. What do you think?

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Speaker 4: I think he should totally stay it's only been four months,

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Speaker 4: have some further conversations with her, get really.

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Speaker 7: To the root.

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Speaker 4: I think he could just have a girl who has

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Speaker 4: some strong values, and I think.

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Speaker 3: It's totally reasonable. I'm sorry, I think I'm listening to you.

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Speaker 1: I'm listening to you too. I'm just the text a

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Speaker 1: coming in the texture. Here's what we here's what we

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Speaker 1: just got. I bet they no no, no, no, no,

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Speaker 1: no no no no, It's just I'm listening to you

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Speaker 1: with the text, I bet they both stand to be.

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Speaker 5: They need a real conversation, man to man.

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Speaker 1: You started, niece, I think you're exactly right.

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Speaker 6: The key here, though, I think I'm totally right.

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Speaker 1: The key is communication, right. I want you to know

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Speaker 1: I started, I started this whole thing by saying the

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Speaker 1: key was communication. And now we've got a little off track,

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Speaker 1: but I still the key is communication, right.

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Speaker 3: Holy communication, find out what the deal is. But four

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Speaker 3: months is completely reasonable. I think he has a girl

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Speaker 3: with values.

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Speaker 2: Okay, fair enoughs that's so rare that girls with that.

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Speaker 4: But that's just crazy that people are thinking about.

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Speaker 1: But let's talk about Jenny's thank you have a great day. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: she's gotta girl with values, values, expensive things. I don't know. Hey, Nikki, Hi, Nikki,

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Speaker 1: you say stay too? You get the final say because

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Speaker 1: it's really gone off the rails. So yeah, please, Okay.

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Speaker 4: I think she should stay, he should stay. I think

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Speaker 4: maybe the young lady has a six month rule for

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Speaker 4: where Hey, after six months with Field, then maybe I

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Speaker 4: will have six or two works.

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Speaker 1: I mean again, I think that's something maybe you say

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Speaker 1: to people. I really hate that though, I gotta and

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Speaker 1: we've talked about this for years on this show. When

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Speaker 1: you say, ah, I have a three date rule, I

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Speaker 1: have a one month rule. I have a six month rule.

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Speaker 1: To me, it's no. But it's so like it's so mechanical,

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Speaker 1: it's inorganic at that point, like you don't have nobody

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Speaker 1: has to do anything. But don't tell me you better

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Speaker 1: take me on three dates because you talk. Let's let's

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Speaker 1: survey people, Nikki, who have a three date rule? How

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Speaker 1: many times you get a fourth date? I want to know,

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Speaker 1: like just just say, look, I'm not ready. I like

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Speaker 1: to wait a while. In my last relationship, I waited

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Speaker 1: this long, like I'm just not I don't know. There's

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Speaker 1: a way to talk about this that comforts him and

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Speaker 1: makes him feel like she is into him. She's just

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Speaker 1: not ready, but she's not saying anything to him at all,

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Speaker 1: and he's becoming insecure about it. And it's a full

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Speaker 1: on relationship and he has a right to feel secure

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Speaker 1: and he has a right to have his needs. Man,

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Speaker 1: And if it's not going to happen, then you know,

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Speaker 1: I still think there's an elements.

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Speaker 4: They definitely have a conversation about it, and then she

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Speaker 4: does have a six month rolls let him know like

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Speaker 4: I've been through this before and I'd rather wait to

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Speaker 4: see how far this is going.

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Speaker 1: You know. Fair enough, Nikki, thank you, have a good day.

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Speaker 4: You'll walk you too,