WEBVTT - The Courage to Feel—Transforming Your Relationship with Emotions (With Dr. Chip Dodd) (Outweigh)

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<v Speaker 1>I won't let my body out me outwait everything that

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<v Speaker 1>I'm made done, won't spend my life trying to change.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm learning love who I am, I get, I'm strong,

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<v Speaker 1>I feel free, I know everybody of me.

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<v Speaker 2>It's beautiful.

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<v Speaker 1>And then he'll always out way if you feel it,

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<v Speaker 1>but you.

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<v Speaker 2>She'll some love to the food.

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<v Speaker 1>By you have there say good day and did you

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<v Speaker 1>and die out?

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<v Speaker 3>Hey hey Leenne here and I hope you enjoyed this

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<v Speaker 3>series with doctor Chip Dodd. Here on outweigh and if

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<v Speaker 3>you want to learn more about how I teach my

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<v Speaker 3>own clients to turn off the part of their brain

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<v Speaker 3>that's obsessed with food, obsessed with their weight, and rewire

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<v Speaker 3>their own brain for peace and freedom, then head on

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<v Speaker 3>over to Stressless eating dot com, where I've literally peeled

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<v Speaker 3>back the curtain and walked you through the exact strategy

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<v Speaker 3>I teach my clients to heal themselves from the all

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<v Speaker 3>or nothing diet mentality for good, but without restricting themselves,

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<v Speaker 3>punishing their bodies, and definitely without ever having to use

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<v Speaker 3>words like macros, low carb or calorie burn. It is

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<v Speaker 3>all over there for you to access over at stressless

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<v Speaker 3>seeding dot com. Happy Saturday out Way, we are back

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<v Speaker 3>for our fourth and final episode of this mini series,

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<v Speaker 3>here with doctor Chip Dodd.

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<v Speaker 2>Hello again, Aileen.

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<v Speaker 4>I've really enjoyed getting to do this with you.

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<v Speaker 3>Thank you, absolutely, it has been amazing. What has been

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<v Speaker 3>just coming out over these microphones. I feel like it's

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<v Speaker 3>just been ordained in something like spontaneous.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>These are the kinds of conversations that you can only

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<v Speaker 3>plan to a certain extent. So I'm so grateful that

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<v Speaker 3>you're here. The series is called Why We Numb The

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<v Speaker 3>Real Root of Coping Mechanisms. But if you've been tuning in,

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<v Speaker 3>obviously we're talking about things like addiction and coping mechanisms,

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<v Speaker 3>but the real why, behind the what, what's causing this?

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<v Speaker 3>How to take back power from your heart so that

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<v Speaker 3>your brain stops hijacking you and that brain heart kind

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<v Speaker 3>of dance that's going on. Why we numb and how

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<v Speaker 3>we are avoiding pain and seeking discomfort, And we talked

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<v Speaker 3>about that from an experiential level and a human level,

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<v Speaker 3>a logic and reason level. But also we've every single

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<v Speaker 3>week hit on the neuroscience. If you're like me and

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<v Speaker 3>you want to get a little geeky and learn about the.

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<v Speaker 2>Why behind the what.

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<v Speaker 3>And then last week we really started transitioning into the

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<v Speaker 3>healing side of this. What do we do now that

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<v Speaker 3>we have all this information, we have this awareness of

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<v Speaker 3>what our problems are and what they aren't, how do

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<v Speaker 3>we actually go take use the tools that we have

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<v Speaker 3>or go get access to tools to start moving forward.

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<v Speaker 2>And so today we're going to talk about.

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<v Speaker 3>Something that might feel a little bit scary to a

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<v Speaker 3>lot of people, which is the idea of feeling our

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<v Speaker 3>feels and having the courage to feel what we're feeling

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<v Speaker 3>and allow those feelings to be there. How to healthily

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<v Speaker 3>process emotions, how to recognize them, how to stop numbing them,

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<v Speaker 3>all of those things, but transforming our relationship with emotions.

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<v Speaker 3>So let's just dive in by talking about first of all,

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<v Speaker 3>there is this kind of not for everyone, but for

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<v Speaker 3>a lot of people, a stigma, a fear of feelings.

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<v Speaker 4>Right.

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<v Speaker 3>I know, I've had my own kind of insecurities of

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<v Speaker 3>like am I over emotional?

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<v Speaker 2>Do I feel things too much?

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<v Speaker 3>Too deeply? And I had to recognize like, no, that's

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<v Speaker 3>just who I am. I'm just a feeling person. But

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<v Speaker 3>that being said, there is a lot of that kind

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<v Speaker 3>of self talk about our feelings and then shame about

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<v Speaker 3>our feelings. So how do we stop fearing those feelings

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<v Speaker 3>and start listening to them in stead?

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<v Speaker 4>And there's so much you know, almost all of us

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<v Speaker 4>carry inside in front of the genuine feelings and the

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<v Speaker 4>courage that we're born with actually believe or not, but

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<v Speaker 4>we have toxic shame, which means we have contempt and

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<v Speaker 4>judgment towards ourselves as weak for having feelings. Okay, like

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<v Speaker 4>then that feelings in and of themselves are a weakness,

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<v Speaker 4>not a strength. And then secondly we're afraid to let

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<v Speaker 4>them out do We get afraid of the judgment, so

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<v Speaker 4>we make up all kinds of stories about what's going

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<v Speaker 4>to happen if I have feelings, what people are going

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<v Speaker 4>to do to me, what they're going to think of me.

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<v Speaker 4>Then the two core essential needs that a human being

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<v Speaker 4>has won't be met. I need to belong and the

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<v Speaker 4>need to matter. But we've decided quote quote a long

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<v Speaker 4>time ago, I only belong to matter when I perform

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<v Speaker 4>a certain way, so my presence isn't as important, not enough.

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<v Speaker 4>So ultimately we have to take the risk of pushing

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<v Speaker 4>through the fear, using it, and then pushing through this

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<v Speaker 4>veil of shame and telling the truth and courage means

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<v Speaker 4>full hearted participation, and believe it or not, when you

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<v Speaker 4>were born, you were probably came out of the womb

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<v Speaker 4>with more courage than you'll ever express the rest of

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<v Speaker 4>your life because you didn't know not to. The toxic

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<v Speaker 4>shame wasn't there, the healthy shame wise, the healthy shame

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<v Speaker 4>is sure, I'm dependent. Of course I'm going to be

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<v Speaker 4>risking making mistakes. I know I don't have all the answers.

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<v Speaker 4>Of course I need you. What's the big problem you

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<v Speaker 4>need me to? What are we doing here? It's like

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<v Speaker 4>the normal natural inborn experience. What we need is just

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<v Speaker 4>boundaries around that, like I don't like that. I need

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<v Speaker 4>you to hear me say I don't like that and

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<v Speaker 4>respond to me. And in other words, it's okay to

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<v Speaker 4>have a self, it's okay to be yourself. And so

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<v Speaker 4>you literally come out of the womb full hearted. You're

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<v Speaker 4>all in like I feel I need, I desire along

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<v Speaker 4>I hope. So the thing easily end is that once

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<v Speaker 4>we find our feelings, which it takes courage, like Okay,

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<v Speaker 4>this could hurt, but I'm dying without it. Look, if

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<v Speaker 4>you don't feel. If you suppressed feel, you don't connect.

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<v Speaker 4>If you don't connect, you're isolated. If you're isolated, you

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<v Speaker 4>are removed from life. If you're removed from life, you're

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<v Speaker 4>not living. If you're not living well, you're going to

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<v Speaker 4>find addiction to continue. But every day is aspiraling down

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<v Speaker 4>towards not wanting to live anymore. I mean, once we

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<v Speaker 4>foreclose on our hearts, we try to leave ourselves behind.

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<v Speaker 4>There's no place to go to be away from how

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<v Speaker 4>I may ultimately except the numbt anesthetize it, deny and

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<v Speaker 4>own and on. So basically, recovery is so much about

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<v Speaker 4>returning to the self, and it is scary because we

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<v Speaker 4>have lots of experiences that tell us why not to

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<v Speaker 4>do it. But it's almost like, you know, hitting bottom

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<v Speaker 4>really means I'm sick and tired of not living. It

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<v Speaker 4>doesn't have to be under a bridge. It can just

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<v Speaker 4>be waking up one day and go, Okay, that's enough,

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<v Speaker 4>and so what do I do? And that's what we're

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<v Speaker 4>going to ask for help, which is a healthy shame

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<v Speaker 4>experience that we'll toxically shame ourselves for right. But then

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<v Speaker 4>at that point it's about feeding your feelings. Of course,

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<v Speaker 4>you know, telling the truth about them. But look, if

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<v Speaker 4>I have fear, I have a need of help from danger.

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<v Speaker 4>If I have sadness, I have a need for comfort

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<v Speaker 4>in it. If I have loneliness, have a need for

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<v Speaker 4>connection to someone someplace somewhere right, and either I address it,

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<v Speaker 4>address it like vulnerably, like admission. Here I am I,

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<v Speaker 4>and I actually choose to be with people I've watched

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<v Speaker 4>who can do it themselves, so I might just get received.

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<v Speaker 4>So courage is taking the risk of returning to how

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<v Speaker 4>we're made again. And yes it's scared. Yes it's scary,

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<v Speaker 4>but every feeling has a corresponding need to need, and

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<v Speaker 4>each feeling has the need of a certain territory, and

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<v Speaker 4>then the admission of desiring something that I don't believe

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<v Speaker 4>will happen or left behind. So it all comes back

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<v Speaker 4>to saying, look, I'm scared of this, and at the

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<v Speaker 4>same time, here I am. Great movie, it's an old movie. Now,

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<v Speaker 4>I'm telling you Goodwill Hunting is one of the greatest

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<v Speaker 4>stories that over. I'm telling you it's fabulous. It's a

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<v Speaker 4>story of returning to courage, how terrifying it is, and

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<v Speaker 4>how the terror in Will Hunting was anxiety when Shane said, man, listen,

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<v Speaker 4>it's not your fault, and he kept coming close and

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<v Speaker 4>it's like, stop it, Shane, don't fool me. Don't do

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<v Speaker 4>this to me if you're lying. In fact, don't do

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<v Speaker 4>this to me at all, because you're getting close to

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<v Speaker 4>me being me and it'll kill me. And instead it

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<v Speaker 4>awakened it. Right. So this is what we're terrified of

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<v Speaker 4>the end. We're so scared that if we have feelings

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<v Speaker 4>it'll kill us. But here's what happens, and it is

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<v Speaker 4>so precious and yet so tragic that this is what

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<v Speaker 4>we've been running from. If you have feedings, two things

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<v Speaker 4>will happen. They really will. If you have feedings. Number one,

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<v Speaker 4>you're gonna have them. I mean you're actually gonna have them,

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<v Speaker 4>like your sadness will probably have tears or there'll be

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<v Speaker 4>just a heavy admission for a little while. Yes, And

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<v Speaker 4>so one you're gonna have feelings, and then you're gonna

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<v Speaker 4>also have memories. Or if you have memories, you're gonna

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<v Speaker 4>have feelings. So that's how calm. We run from feelings

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<v Speaker 4>because our memories have told us it's not a good

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<v Speaker 4>thing to do or it's unsafe. So When we return

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<v Speaker 4>to feedings, we're returning to how come we left them behind.

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<v Speaker 4>When we return to memories, we're going to be returning

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<v Speaker 4>to the feelings we suppressed or attempted to escape from.

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<v Speaker 4>And what's amazing is once we've become dedicated to not

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<v Speaker 4>feeling is crazy as it sounds, it's a loyalty to

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<v Speaker 4>toxic shame. It's a loyalty to our own self hate.

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<v Speaker 4>And then it's tragically, it's a loyalty to the very

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<v Speaker 4>people if they had a chance to repeat, probably wouldn't

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<v Speaker 4>do it that way, we hope. But it's a loyalty

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<v Speaker 4>towards the very people that taught us to harm ourselves.

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<v Speaker 4>As they were harming themselves. They couldn't tolerate feelings, so

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<v Speaker 4>they taught us to keep them comfortable. That's the family

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<v Speaker 4>of origin issue. Usually, So feelings won't kill you, they'll

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<v Speaker 4>bring you to life, but it starts with just having them.

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<v Speaker 4>Yes you'll have feelings, and yes you'll have memories, and

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<v Speaker 4>believe it or not, after the grief, there is a RESTful,

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<v Speaker 4>tiredness that feels good after the loneliness spoken and somebody

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<v Speaker 4>actually says, hey, I get it, and all of a sudden.

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<v Speaker 4>You have a day of just sort of sharing, and

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<v Speaker 4>afterwards you leave, You're like, I need to call you back,

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<v Speaker 4>say you're laughing at me, and they say, no, I'm

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<v Speaker 4>not laughing. Maybe I just did, like, no, I'm not laughing.

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<v Speaker 4>Are you crazy? I get it, absolutely, So we will

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<v Speaker 4>distrust it. But what we're distrusting is that we're just

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<v Speaker 4>trusting the healing. We're just trusting I just received what

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<v Speaker 4>I'm made to have, So we distrust that this could

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<v Speaker 4>be real.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and it feels scary in a way to think

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<v Speaker 3>about the concept of healing, But honestly, when you think

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<v Speaker 3>about what's scarier, not healing is scarier.

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<v Speaker 4>It is you know, and it's because and that we can.

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<v Speaker 3>Right absolutely, it's the devil that we know. You mentioned

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<v Speaker 3>this idea of loneliness or the isolation side of it

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<v Speaker 3>and the hiding, and we talked about avoidance a lot

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<v Speaker 3>back in episode two. But the loneliness and the isolation part.

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<v Speaker 3>I can't believe we even skipped over that, because that's

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<v Speaker 3>a big part when we are in the throes of

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<v Speaker 3>what feels like an addiction, the coping mechanism, the toxic

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<v Speaker 3>shame that that you know then exacerbates everything else that

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<v Speaker 3>the tendencies to then avoid and hide, and that secrecy

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<v Speaker 3>almost it feels like a dirty little secret. Yes, so

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<v Speaker 3>in terms of obviously we know the answer is coming

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<v Speaker 3>back to the heart of who you are and dealing

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<v Speaker 3>safe to be needed and be in need, I should say,

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<v Speaker 3>but kind of weave that in for us too, about

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<v Speaker 3>the hiding and.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, it's like it's like the once we have rejected feelings,

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<v Speaker 4>you don't trust them to be the truth of our experience.

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<v Speaker 4>We literally spend our lives devising ways to avoid feeling

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<v Speaker 4>while still getting our needs met. So we're getting farther

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<v Speaker 4>and farther away from being able to connect, even if

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<v Speaker 4>we look like we're the most connected person in the world.

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<v Speaker 4>Even you can be avoiding while being the life of

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<v Speaker 4>the party, yep, and leave after the party and have

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<v Speaker 4>never felt so alone in your life. Janis Joplin is

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<v Speaker 4>so famous one of the greatest blues rock say years

0:12:00.200 --> 0:12:06.120
<v Speaker 4>of all times, I mean poured out herself with expression. Afterwards,

0:12:06.120 --> 0:12:08.720
<v Speaker 4>she said, I've never been more alone in my life

0:12:08.800 --> 0:12:11.840
<v Speaker 4>than after leaving the stage with twenty five thousand fans

0:12:11.880 --> 0:12:16.600
<v Speaker 4>adoring fans, and then she went straight into promiscuity, Heroine

0:12:16.679 --> 0:12:20.040
<v Speaker 4>all the drug use because she couldn't tolerate being in need.

0:12:20.760 --> 0:12:23.600
<v Speaker 4>She could perform to get her needs met, but couldn't

0:12:23.600 --> 0:12:26.600
<v Speaker 4>tolerate being with herself and asking somebody to be with

0:12:26.679 --> 0:12:29.839
<v Speaker 4>her without her having to avoid distract and so on.

0:12:30.360 --> 0:12:35.480
<v Speaker 4>But what happens, It says cursed, which means isolated, not condemned,

0:12:35.520 --> 0:12:40.840
<v Speaker 4>but cursed is the person who trust in their own flesh,

0:12:40.880 --> 0:12:46.560
<v Speaker 4>their own devising ways to numb myself, who depend upon

0:12:46.600 --> 0:12:49.600
<v Speaker 4>their own will power, their own strength, whose heart is

0:12:49.720 --> 0:12:54.320
<v Speaker 4>removed from God. And it's not about religion. It's about

0:12:54.360 --> 0:12:57.480
<v Speaker 4>we're made to find fulfillment and relationship by being connected

0:12:57.520 --> 0:13:01.320
<v Speaker 4>to the universe and connected to others, trusting that the

0:13:01.480 --> 0:13:05.520
<v Speaker 4>universe as in God, and people as in specific people

0:13:05.640 --> 0:13:09.000
<v Speaker 4>want our good. And that's how we end up relinquishing

0:13:09.120 --> 0:13:13.679
<v Speaker 4>our control to giving over to say you want my good, Well,

0:13:13.679 --> 0:13:16.920
<v Speaker 4>I'm made for that good and I want to receive

0:13:16.960 --> 0:13:19.680
<v Speaker 4>that good. Also I become somebody who wants to do good.

0:13:20.440 --> 0:13:22.960
<v Speaker 4>You can't do good unless you have a self to

0:13:22.960 --> 0:13:25.040
<v Speaker 4>do it with, and you cannot give what you do

0:13:25.080 --> 0:13:27.120
<v Speaker 4>not have. So the first thing we have to do

0:13:27.720 --> 0:13:30.520
<v Speaker 4>is be needy to find out we can come back

0:13:30.559 --> 0:13:33.120
<v Speaker 4>to life, and the people of us, those of us

0:13:33.160 --> 0:13:35.760
<v Speaker 4>who have come closest to losing our lives, have the

0:13:35.760 --> 0:13:38.760
<v Speaker 4>most to give to life because there are more people

0:13:38.800 --> 0:13:40.960
<v Speaker 4>who are running from life than there are people who

0:13:41.040 --> 0:13:42.200
<v Speaker 4>are living in life.

0:13:42.280 --> 0:13:46.000
<v Speaker 2>It's so true, isn't it. Yeah? Wow, so so powerful.

0:13:46.320 --> 0:13:48.240
<v Speaker 3>Well, no pressure, But if you were to put a

0:13:48.280 --> 0:13:51.040
<v Speaker 3>wrapper around what you want people to know from all

0:13:51.080 --> 0:13:52.960
<v Speaker 3>four episodes of the series.

0:13:52.760 --> 0:13:53.280
<v Speaker 2>What would it be?

0:13:53.679 --> 0:13:56.080
<v Speaker 4>Gosh, there's so many things. Let's go with this that

0:13:56.480 --> 0:14:02.080
<v Speaker 4>I think that when Jesus said to the disciples experiencing, like,

0:14:02.640 --> 0:14:06.439
<v Speaker 4>how can anybody do this? And then Jesus literally took

0:14:06.520 --> 0:14:09.080
<v Speaker 4>a child and said, hey, come here, come here, and

0:14:09.120 --> 0:14:12.520
<v Speaker 4>the child stood by his knee. In my picture anyway,

0:14:13.120 --> 0:14:15.559
<v Speaker 4>and it's Matthew eighteen two and three, and it said,

0:14:16.000 --> 0:14:19.800
<v Speaker 4>unless you change and become like one of these, which

0:14:19.840 --> 0:14:22.400
<v Speaker 4>is to have faith like this. And the faith is

0:14:22.480 --> 0:14:26.320
<v Speaker 4>not a systematic theology. The faith is being in need

0:14:26.360 --> 0:14:29.640
<v Speaker 4>and having feelings. I'm hoping for something and I was

0:14:29.680 --> 0:14:33.760
<v Speaker 4>born to picture something I haven't found yet. Okay, you

0:14:33.840 --> 0:14:36.840
<v Speaker 4>can't change yourself, Jesus said, unless you change, it becomes

0:14:36.880 --> 0:14:40.320
<v Speaker 4>you can't change yourself you can shift your habits, you

0:14:40.360 --> 0:14:43.640
<v Speaker 4>can't change yourself. You have to admit your need to

0:14:43.680 --> 0:14:46.880
<v Speaker 4>be connected, and then you return to becoming. You're back

0:14:46.880 --> 0:14:49.480
<v Speaker 4>on the road of being yourself. So I would hope

0:14:49.480 --> 0:14:53.000
<v Speaker 4>that feel your feelings, be able to tell the truth

0:14:53.040 --> 0:14:56.120
<v Speaker 4>about them and believe it or not. Hand yourself over

0:14:56.160 --> 0:14:58.200
<v Speaker 4>to a process, Give it to God, give it to

0:14:58.280 --> 0:15:02.080
<v Speaker 4>the process, and the process as itself heals us. There's

0:15:02.120 --> 0:15:04.960
<v Speaker 4>a river. We put our raft in. The river takes

0:15:05.040 --> 0:15:06.880
<v Speaker 4>us to where we're made to go. We just got

0:15:06.920 --> 0:15:08.440
<v Speaker 4>to be willing to take the risks that we can

0:15:08.440 --> 0:15:10.280
<v Speaker 4>find out how to swim and we won't drown.

0:15:11.040 --> 0:15:15.440
<v Speaker 3>Feel your feelings, feel the feeling. I'm curious, so so powerful, Yeah,

0:15:15.520 --> 0:15:19.560
<v Speaker 3>so simple yet you know, simple, not easy, but so powerful.

0:15:19.560 --> 0:15:21.400
<v Speaker 4>And again, if you're easy, the whole wheeler would do

0:15:21.480 --> 0:15:21.760
<v Speaker 4>it right.

0:15:21.960 --> 0:15:25.080
<v Speaker 3>Exactly and so different from what the world is telling

0:15:25.160 --> 0:15:29.320
<v Speaker 3>us about addiction and coping mechanisms. Is that work harder, resist,

0:15:29.520 --> 0:15:32.520
<v Speaker 3>white knuckle will power control, And it's like no, it's

0:15:32.560 --> 0:15:36.480
<v Speaker 3>the opposite. Surrender, feel, release, humble yourself like a child.

0:15:36.960 --> 0:15:39.480
<v Speaker 3>You know, don't be afraid to say I know nothing,

0:15:39.560 --> 0:15:40.840
<v Speaker 3>I know nothing about nothing.

0:15:41.160 --> 0:15:44.080
<v Speaker 2>You know, God, Universe, what do you have for me? Yeah,

0:15:44.160 --> 0:15:45.480
<v Speaker 2>and again I'm in need.

0:15:45.600 --> 0:15:47.640
<v Speaker 4>Well the last thing if you have time, but like

0:15:47.760 --> 0:15:50.400
<v Speaker 4>just let's just touch based on food for just to say, yeah,

0:15:51.400 --> 0:15:53.520
<v Speaker 4>we have to eat, We're made to eat, We're going

0:15:53.600 --> 0:15:58.120
<v Speaker 4>to eat. Okay. What's amazing is when you find yourself

0:15:58.480 --> 0:16:02.800
<v Speaker 4>and actually say I care about me and I want

0:16:02.840 --> 0:16:07.600
<v Speaker 4>to live life fully. It's not about perfection, it's about practice.

0:16:08.360 --> 0:16:11.320
<v Speaker 4>But when I finally face I really want something, I

0:16:11.400 --> 0:16:14.640
<v Speaker 4>just want something. Then guess what if I really want

0:16:14.680 --> 0:16:18.040
<v Speaker 4>something versus have to do something? If I really want

0:16:18.040 --> 0:16:22.160
<v Speaker 4>something versus should? You see, we're created God created is

0:16:22.200 --> 0:16:26.680
<v Speaker 4>to reject should should should? Should should? When I want something,

0:16:26.720 --> 0:16:30.160
<v Speaker 4>you know what, I'm willing to kind of like practice

0:16:30.200 --> 0:16:33.600
<v Speaker 4>being in pain for something, and then that becomes being

0:16:33.640 --> 0:16:37.800
<v Speaker 4>good at delaying like immediate reception. And then all of

0:16:37.800 --> 0:16:41.880
<v Speaker 4>a sudden I found like, hey, that workout, that waiting,

0:16:42.040 --> 0:16:47.000
<v Speaker 4>that delay, that eating certain things left me better. And

0:16:47.000 --> 0:16:48.720
<v Speaker 4>then all of a sudden, what we find out is

0:16:48.760 --> 0:16:52.560
<v Speaker 4>that to want to becomes a lifestyle. It becomes a

0:16:52.600 --> 0:16:55.000
<v Speaker 4>sense of get to, not have to, And once you

0:16:55.080 --> 0:16:58.320
<v Speaker 4>get to because you want to, you're free to keep

0:16:58.320 --> 0:17:00.640
<v Speaker 4>doing it. So we're gonna eat.

0:17:00.920 --> 0:17:01.240
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:17:01.280 --> 0:17:05.320
<v Speaker 4>So there is a process. Uh, we call it self love,

0:17:05.359 --> 0:17:07.320
<v Speaker 4>we call it delagrad, we call all kinds of things.

0:17:07.320 --> 0:17:10.320
<v Speaker 4>But feeling your feelings and finding that man, you were

0:17:10.359 --> 0:17:15.280
<v Speaker 4>made right, and you've got a yes within you that's

0:17:15.320 --> 0:17:18.320
<v Speaker 4>waiting to be addressed, and you say yes to how

0:17:18.359 --> 0:17:21.080
<v Speaker 4>you're made it, you end up you wind up wanting

0:17:21.119 --> 0:17:22.920
<v Speaker 4>to do good for yourself absolutely.

0:17:22.960 --> 0:17:24.960
<v Speaker 3>And freedom, like what I just to stack on what

0:17:25.000 --> 0:17:27.280
<v Speaker 3>you just said because it's so so powerful. Freedom is

0:17:27.280 --> 0:17:30.000
<v Speaker 3>giving your yourself the ability to make these choices that

0:17:30.080 --> 0:17:33.160
<v Speaker 3>serve you, rather than constantly feeling like choices being taken away. Yes,

0:17:33.480 --> 0:17:35.760
<v Speaker 3>or life is just happening to you.

0:17:35.760 --> 0:17:36.159
<v Speaker 2>You know it.

0:17:36.359 --> 0:17:38.480
<v Speaker 3>You take back power from it. But it starts, it

0:17:38.520 --> 0:17:40.960
<v Speaker 3>starts at your heart. And and like you said, it

0:17:40.960 --> 0:17:43.199
<v Speaker 3>doesn't have to be a deep, dark rock bottom, but

0:17:43.240 --> 0:17:44.840
<v Speaker 3>you do have to get to that place where you're like, no,

0:17:44.880 --> 0:17:47.960
<v Speaker 3>I'm no longer living to live, I'm no longer willing

0:17:48.040 --> 0:17:50.680
<v Speaker 3>to live in this, in this howl, or live as

0:17:50.720 --> 0:17:52.600
<v Speaker 3>a you know, a victim to my circumstances or a

0:17:52.680 --> 0:17:54.960
<v Speaker 3>victim to the way that my brain has kind of

0:17:54.960 --> 0:17:55.800
<v Speaker 3>been taking over me.

0:17:56.000 --> 0:17:59.120
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, and that doesn't become will power becomes who will

0:17:59.119 --> 0:18:01.400
<v Speaker 4>help me yes, and ask you for it, and then

0:18:01.520 --> 0:18:04.040
<v Speaker 4>actually taking a risk of daring to question if that

0:18:04.080 --> 0:18:04.800
<v Speaker 4>will really work.

0:18:05.800 --> 0:18:10.159
<v Speaker 3>Contend, fight yes, fight for your freedom absolutely, rather than

0:18:10.280 --> 0:18:13.800
<v Speaker 3>argue for your failure your lamentations. So wilse it well,

0:18:13.920 --> 0:18:16.480
<v Speaker 3>thank you so much for being here. And guys, there's

0:18:16.560 --> 0:18:19.560
<v Speaker 3>a bunch of free resources over at Chipdodd dot com,

0:18:19.600 --> 0:18:22.760
<v Speaker 3>including his amazing Gift of Feelings and the eight Core

0:18:22.800 --> 0:18:26.800
<v Speaker 3>Feelings and Their Purposes, which he goes into depth about

0:18:27.160 --> 0:18:28.120
<v Speaker 3>in the Voice of the Heart.

0:18:28.160 --> 0:18:29.600
<v Speaker 2>So I can't recommend that book enough.

0:18:29.840 --> 0:18:33.080
<v Speaker 3>Also, he's got an amazing podcast, You definitely need to

0:18:33.240 --> 0:18:35.359
<v Speaker 3>check that out, the Living with Heart Podcasts. You can

0:18:35.359 --> 0:18:38.240
<v Speaker 3>find it anywhere podcasts or stream And we are just

0:18:38.280 --> 0:18:40.119
<v Speaker 3>so grateful that you came here on this series.

0:18:40.160 --> 0:18:40.840
<v Speaker 1>Thank you so much.

0:18:41.080 --> 0:18:45.200
<v Speaker 4>Thanks man, God bless absolutely right. Bye bye