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Speaker 1: All right, right, I'm Life from Philly. It's been number

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Speaker 1: one rated. Polly and Tony po yo as always, Polly

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Speaker 1: fools go here with Tony. Fools go with Tony. Huge

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Speaker 1: shout that. Let's go. People these more runs. They come

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Speaker 1: up to us, they say, we're biased toward the Eagles.

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Speaker 1: Get out of here, You're biased. Total stupidity, dummies. We're

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Speaker 1: gonna give you a totally objective take on all the

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Speaker 1: big stories that Jason Kelsey phone smashing. You're actually gonna

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Speaker 1: take the kids side, Okays League Eagles Cowboys with Tony.

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Speaker 2: Is here, you know, let's go.

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Speaker 3: We're gonna break down this matchup in a way that

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Speaker 3: is totally fair and balanced for both sides. The future

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Speaker 3: super Bowl champs and the worst team in NFL history.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely and also Joe LMB suspended by the NBA. We'll

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Speaker 1: tell you why the NBA should be suspended it and Tony. Okay,

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Speaker 1: a totally original segment. It's the middle of the NFL

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Speaker 1: designed so you know, you know how people they like

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Speaker 1: to give awards for things like, you know, movies at

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Speaker 1: TV shows. I'll see what we're gonna do. We're gonna

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Speaker 1: give awards to NFL players. It's gonna be our mid

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Speaker 1: season NFL Awards.

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Speaker 3: Wait, frankly, you know, I can't believe nobody but us

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Speaker 3: has come up with this or does this.

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Speaker 1: It's just your laziness, don't That's all it is. Anyway,

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Speaker 1: that's what you call a super tase people. You see,

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Speaker 1: we put it all at the front. That way, you're

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Speaker 1: going to watch the back hang around. You'll watch the

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Speaker 1: whole thing make us more revenue. Okay with that, let's

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Speaker 1: get right into our top story.

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Speaker 2: All right, our top story.

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Speaker 1: Eagle's hero Jason Kelsey under fire after he took some

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Speaker 1: kids cell phone and slammed it from the ground. After

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Speaker 1: the kid said his brother Travis was well, you know,

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Speaker 1: use the word that we don't say anymore, don't. We

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Speaker 1: don't say that. But you know what he basically said

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Speaker 1: was Travis was kind of a girl, I guess because

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Speaker 1: he was in a relationship with popstar Taylor Swift. You

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Speaker 1: know that's not manly at all. So, you know, Tony,

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Speaker 1: I gotta say breaking this down. I don't one hundred

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Speaker 1: percent disagree with this kid.

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Speaker 2: You know, I gotta say it too.

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Speaker 3: Let's face it, it's not manly to like Taylor Swift.

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Speaker 1: No.

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Speaker 3: Personally, I've never listened to any of her songs, and

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Speaker 3: I'm not familiar at all, So there's not much I

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Speaker 3: can really say about this. But you know, I will

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Speaker 3: just say that when I saw the video of Jason

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Speaker 3: Kelsey smashing the kid's phone, I thought to myself, that

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Speaker 3: kid was just being a hater, and the haters are

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Speaker 3: gonna just hate, you know, that's what they do. I mean,

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Speaker 3: he was trouble as soon as he walked in too,

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Speaker 3: you know the frame of that cell phone video, and

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Speaker 3: I thought, wow, look what.

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Speaker 2: He made him do.

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Speaker 3: Really, they both just need to calm down because now

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Speaker 3: they have bad blood, you know, problems, and I don't

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Speaker 3: think they can solve him right now. And now there's

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Speaker 3: a blank space in his pocket where his phone was.

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Speaker 3: But again, you know, I don't have much else to

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Speaker 3: say about the situation because I'm just not familiar with Taylor.

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Speaker 1: Swift's I'm not that familiar either, don't you know. Maybe

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Speaker 1: let's just move on to you know, actual football stories.

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Speaker 1: You know, but before we get into the Eagles Cowboys matchup,

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Speaker 1: you know, we just need to set the record straight

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Speaker 1: right on a few things from last week. We already

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Speaker 1: mentioned on our social media is not in the show,

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Speaker 1: and it's just crucial, you know, for us to say

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Speaker 1: that takes here right now, so you know we can

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Speaker 1: lengthen this video and get increase. I used to watch

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Speaker 1: the exactly revenue. Yeah. Anyway, you know, people they're saying

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Speaker 1: that the Eagles almost blew the end of the game

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Speaker 1: against the Jaguars. They're not seeing the obvious reason for

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Speaker 1: what happened there. Tell them, don't.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it was the end of daylight savings time.

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Speaker 3: Their bodies were telling them that the game had ended

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Speaker 3: an hour earlier. By the fourth quarter, you could see

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Speaker 3: half of Phillies defense was basically in rem sleep.

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Speaker 2: It was like double lot for them.

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Speaker 3: I mean, I was asleep at halftime, but that was

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Speaker 3: because it was the Jaguars.

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Speaker 2: Playing, and I always fall asleep during their game.

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Speaker 3: It's just like everybody else does, so did Iah.

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Speaker 1: Course, that's what happens anyone. Horrific clock and biological analysis there.

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Speaker 1: And you know, I'm Eagles fans who are morons. You know.

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Speaker 1: They booed Nick Sirianni because of his aggressive play calling

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Speaker 1: where he kept going for it, you know, instead of

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Speaker 1: kicking and taking the points. Tody what is the one

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Speaker 1: thing people always say in sports?

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Speaker 3: Never take your foot off the gas. You know, the

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Speaker 3: real legends know you gotta stay aggressive. Look at the

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Speaker 3: greatest race car driver ever, Dale Earnhardt. He never took

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Speaker 3: his foot off the gas. And okay, he died when

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Speaker 3: he hit a wall. But still, and then think about

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Speaker 3: the movies. You know, they fast and furious. You know,

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Speaker 3: I think that guy might have died too, But still,

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Speaker 3: you get my point totally?

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Speaker 1: All right, Now, let's to the Cowboys. And last week,

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Speaker 1: you know, during the loss to the Falcons, Dak was

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Speaker 1: caught on the sideline saying we suck on Camvas. Saw that,

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Speaker 1: and well this changes a lot, doesn't it. Doughty.

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Speaker 3: Absolutely, If you look at things like passing, yeah, Dak

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Speaker 3: is inaccurate. But if you look at noticing whether his

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Speaker 3: team sucks, Dak has tremendous accuracy and awareness.

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Speaker 2: Yep, so I now think it's fair to.

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Speaker 3: Call Dak one of the most accurate qbs in the league.

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Speaker 1: You're totally agreat, Doughty. I have to Yeah, just how

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Speaker 1: he's injured on injured reserve hamstring injury, and well that

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Speaker 1: you know, and other factors have led us to update

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Speaker 1: our prediction for Sunday's game between the Eagles and Cowboys,

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Speaker 1: tell him Tony. Yep.

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Speaker 3: Originally we had the Eagles winning fifty five nothing, but

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Speaker 3: now dak is out and Cooper Rush is in, So

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Speaker 3: based on that improvement for Dallas, we're updating our prediction

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Speaker 3: to Eagles fifty five, Cowboys seven.

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Speaker 1: Yep.

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Speaker 3: But also so Ezekiel Elliott might still be benched, so

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Speaker 3: their running game won't suck as much, so that makes

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Speaker 3: it fifty five to fourteen. And you know their kicker,

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Speaker 3: Brandon Aubrey, he doesn't suck as much as the rest

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Speaker 3: of his teammates, so he could hit a couple of

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Speaker 3: seventy arders, so that makes it fifty five to twenty.

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Speaker 3: And Micah Parsons is back, so that'll make their defense

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Speaker 3: much better. So we'll take three points away from Philly

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Speaker 3: and that makes it fifty two to twenty. But then again,

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Speaker 3: Mike McCarthy's still the head coach of the Dallas Cowboys,

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Speaker 3: so factoring that in, it'll be Eagles eighty two, Cowboys three.

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Speaker 1: Just terrific computational analysis that Tony and will now staying

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Speaker 1: in the NFC East, you know it's a crisis that

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Speaker 1: we've been warning you about for months. Yeah, this weekend,

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Speaker 1: the NFL will be playing a game in Germany and

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Speaker 1: sending the giants and banters arelay there now a sound outrageous,

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Speaker 1: you know, or over the top here. But this could

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Speaker 1: be worse than World War Two, couldn't it, Tony?

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Speaker 2: You know?

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Speaker 3: In World War Two we sent our best people over there,

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Speaker 3: Dwipe D, Einstein Storm and Norman Rockwell, but now we're

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Speaker 3: sending our worst people. The Germans are gonna take one

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Speaker 3: look at Daniel Jones and Bryce Young and think, if

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Speaker 3: this is what America thinks is a good athlete, we

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Speaker 3: should just go walk in there and conquer the country

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Speaker 3: right now. So don't be surprised if you wake up

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Speaker 3: tomorrow and see their U boats in your backyard.

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Speaker 1: Just a terrifying situation that Tony is scary. Yeah. Well,

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Speaker 1: now to another terrifying situation. You see that's wow. Oh

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Speaker 1: that's a segue. You say the one thing and then

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Speaker 1: you say it again.

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Speaker 3: Take out your pencils and papers and write that down.

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Speaker 1: Yep, take notes being Oh yeah, well, now to this

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Speaker 1: terrifying situation in the NBA. The NBA, and it's nerd

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Speaker 1: Commissioner Adam Silva suspended sixers started Joel Embiid three games

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Speaker 1: for shoving beat reporter Marcus Hayes. Now here's the quick backstory,

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Speaker 1: all right, That em bead had said he wanted to

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Speaker 1: leave a good legacy for his son and his dead

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Speaker 1: brother who he named his son after him. Well, Hayes

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Speaker 1: went and wrote that if he wanted to do that,

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Speaker 1: he needed to improve his work ethic disgusting, and well, Tony,

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Speaker 1: I think that deserves a shove, if not more.

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Speaker 3: You know, people forget where the name beat reporters actually

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Speaker 3: came from. We all know after games athletes would routinely

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Speaker 3: beat reporters who asked stupid questions. We all remember nineteen

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Speaker 3: ninety one when a reporter from the Philly Inquirer asked

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Speaker 3: Charles Barkley a question about why he sucked compared to

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Speaker 3: debt left shrimp, and then Barkley naturally bludgeoned the reporter

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Speaker 3: to death with his bare hands, and no charges were

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Speaker 3: filed because everyone knew that was just part of the business.

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Speaker 1: Exactly part of the business. Great perspective that, Tony.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, frankly, nobody should be surprised by Embiid's behavior, and

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Speaker 3: Bid is an elite defender. Do you expect him to

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Speaker 3: just stop defending because he's off the court. Yep, I mean,

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Speaker 3: you know you can't turn those instincts off. In fact,

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Speaker 3: a few weeks ago, my buddy was actually behind Joe

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Speaker 3: l Embiid at the supermarket and he put his stuff

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Speaker 3: on the conveyor belt at the checkout line, but forgot

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Speaker 3: to put the divided down, and then Bid just swatted

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Speaker 3: his groceries away, and my friend was like, what a

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Speaker 3: fucking asshole, And I was like, he's an elite defender.

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Speaker 2: He was defending the grocery lane.

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Speaker 1: Terrific and insightful example. That don'ting. And well, now before

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Speaker 1: we get to our awards, it's time for what we

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Speaker 1: call in the business, a branded integration O. People probably

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Speaker 1: have no idea what that is. Will explain. That's okay.

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Speaker 1: We normally do ad reads right here, rightight, but you'll

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Speaker 1: see advertisers these days, in this modern age, You'll see

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Speaker 1: they prefer to have their brand. We're naturally into the

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Speaker 1: content eight degrade. Yeah, so it seems like part of

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Speaker 1: the show. So that's what we're gonna do right now

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Speaker 1: in our next segment.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you're not even gonna know we're doing an AD exactly.

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Speaker 1: And that's why it's time right now for stop that

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Speaker 1: leak presented by Depends Undergarments. You know, Tony, so many

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Speaker 1: defenses have leaks in them right now, just like when

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Speaker 1: old people accidentally piss their payoffs. Absolutely which defense needs

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Speaker 1: to stop that leak?

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Speaker 3: You gotta look at the Carolina panthers who have been

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Speaker 3: letting teams run all over them, like when an old

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Speaker 3: person has running diarrhea and it gets all over.

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Speaker 2: Their ass and nthighs.

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Speaker 3: Yep, Carolina is dead last in passing yards allowed, just

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Speaker 3: like an old man who is near dead and on

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Speaker 3: his last legs and has holds and his piss defense

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Speaker 3: which allows the piss to get through the hole and

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Speaker 3: his penis. So I say, the Carolina Panthers need to

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Speaker 3: stop that leak brought to you by Depends Undergarments.

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Speaker 1: See, I didn't even know that was an ad tot

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Speaker 1: it couldn't.

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Speaker 3: It was perfectly organic, just right into the content. I

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Speaker 3: didn't even feel like I was doing an ad, yep.

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Speaker 1: And we got paid huge, huge, So great, Tony. Anyway,

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Speaker 1: all right, it's time now. You know we're in the

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Speaker 1: middle of the NFL season. So we're gonna do our

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Speaker 1: very original segment, yeah, on any other show, because they're

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Speaker 1: all lazy, can't be creative. I get the music ready,

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Speaker 1: queue it up. It's time to hand out our mid

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Speaker 1: season NFL Awards. Mid Season NFL Awards. Okay, Tony, our

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Speaker 1: first category best haircuts, And of course you gotta give

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Speaker 1: it to Nick Sirianni, who came out a few weeks

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Speaker 1: ago with a totally shaven, bald look. He bravely came

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Speaker 1: back from the bye week totally bald, and the Eagles

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Speaker 1: have been undefeated four and ohs since then because he

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Speaker 1: knows what a waste of time it is to be

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Speaker 1: washing your hair, wasted time when you could use that

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Speaker 1: time to be watching game film.

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Speaker 3: And also you see things more clearly because you don't

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Speaker 3: have all that hair.

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Speaker 2: Flying around in your face. Just look at Jalen Hurts.

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Speaker 3: He has that terrific aerodynamic nineties buzz cut like the

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Speaker 3: guys from House Party, and.

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Speaker 2: He's seeing the field so crystal clear.

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Speaker 1: Great point, Tony. I mean, you know, every time Patrick

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Speaker 1: mahomes that bubbm throws an interception, I think up his

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Speaker 1: girls must have slipped out of his bandana and impated

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Speaker 1: his vision. Yep. And also he sucks he's overrated, but

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Speaker 1: you know also exactly Yeah, all right, moving on to

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Speaker 1: our next category. This one is a most forgettable mid

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Speaker 1: season firing. Easy one. Tony has to be ex Saints

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Speaker 1: coach Dennis Allen. You know, in fact, I totally forgot

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Speaker 1: that he got fired. I actually did a quick Google

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Speaker 1: search right before the segment just confirmed because I had

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Speaker 1: already forgotten your thoughts.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I honestly don't have any, you know, because I

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Speaker 3: actually didn't even know Dennis Allen was the Saints coach

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Speaker 3: until he got fired.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, me neither, Tony. Yeah, I thought he was like

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Speaker 1: defensive coordinator for the Raiders somewhere. Yeah, I don't even know,

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Speaker 1: but you know what. Away, Let's move on to our

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Speaker 1: next category. A controversial one here, Tony, this one is

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Speaker 1: most concussed. And while Chris o'lava he made a good

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Speaker 1: run at the end there for the fourth consecutive year,

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Speaker 1: it goes to do it tag whatever his name to

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Speaker 1: and you know, doing just doing everything he can to

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Speaker 1: lock up this award as an he coat.

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Speaker 3: You know, people keep asking why he keeps coming back

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Speaker 3: to play and it's clear it's because he doesn't remember

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Speaker 3: the previous thirty two games when other teams treated his

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Speaker 3: cranium like it was a pinata at my.

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Speaker 2: Five year old nephew's birthday.

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Speaker 3: But you know, as they say, ignorance is bliss and

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Speaker 3: nobody could be happier right now than tour.

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Speaker 1: Yup and especially now that he's taken home this aw

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Speaker 1: don'ngratulations due now to our next category. This one is

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Speaker 1: best pregame studio Show, and of course, for the twenty

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Speaker 1: third year in a row, it goes to the NFL

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Speaker 1: on CBS, you know, the other networks they're trying to

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Speaker 1: entertain you or you know, force you to watch Tony

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Speaker 1: Dungee and Jason Garrett the most uncomfortable on camera presences

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Speaker 1: since Dirty Debutant seventeen. Don't watch that, Yeah, don't watch that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah anyway, Tony, you know, this show has been so

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Speaker 1: great year after year with its brand of bland dry

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Speaker 1: zero edge sports talk, and they made changes this year,

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Speaker 1: you know, to make it even less edgy. And that

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Speaker 1: was so great, wasn't it.

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Speaker 3: It was get a little too edgy and relevant with

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Speaker 3: Boomerasiasin and Phil Simms, and luckily CBS brought in Matt

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Speaker 3: Ryan and kept Bill Cower and now it's slower, drier

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Speaker 3: and doesn't distract you with any at detaining so that

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Speaker 3: you the viewer can focus on the games, which is

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Speaker 3: exactly what a good pregame show should do.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely, just great television at Tony. And now go our

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Speaker 1: next category, worst performance by a quarterback. Lots of strong

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Speaker 1: contenders here, Tony, and totally Bryce Young versus the Saints,

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Speaker 1: Bryce Young versus the Chargers, Bo Nicks versus everybody, but

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Speaker 1: we gotta go with none other than Daniel Jones, who,

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Speaker 1: against the Commanders the other week, became the first QBA

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Speaker 1: since nineteen seventy eight to throw a touchdown pass in

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Speaker 1: a half while registering zero passing yards. Just a tremendous accomplishment,

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Speaker 1: isn't it, Tony? Wow?

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Speaker 3: You know, Daniel Jones figured it out. He realized he

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Speaker 3: was getting intercepted too much. So what he needed to

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Speaker 3: do was figure out a way to throw touchdowns without

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Speaker 3: actually throwing the ball anywhere.

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Speaker 2: And he did just that. It's a miracle of math.

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Speaker 1: You know, you know, Tony, As we always say, the

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Speaker 1: athlete is best where they recognized their limitations and he

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Speaker 1: realized he's Daniel Jones is perfect when he's throwing zero

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Speaker 1: passing yard. He cracked the code, and well that leads

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Speaker 1: us to the final award of the show. Of course,

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Speaker 1: we're talking about most Overrated day and here we go.

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Speaker 1: I revealed the winner. Oh would you look at this?

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Speaker 1: It's an eleven weight dime and Bill's Texans, Ravens, Commanders, Cardos, Falcons, Vikings,

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Speaker 1: Rams and the Packers who we beat.

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Speaker 3: Of course, all teams. They're benefited from an easy schedule.

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Speaker 3: All overrated.

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Speaker 1: They go. That wraps up. God, mid season awards. Congratulations

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Speaker 1: all the winners, all right? Then, yeah, look at that.

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Speaker 1: That wraps up, which was just a perfect show all around.

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Speaker 1: It really was support Our sponsor depends undergarments and.

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Speaker 2: Are you kidding me?

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Speaker 1: Someone who's going to be his pants in a few

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Speaker 1: moments there? What Yeah, produce Jay, what do you want?

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Speaker 4: Corrections?

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Speaker 1: Who go go?

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Speaker 4: You were talking about World War Two and mentioned Dwight

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Speaker 4: Einstein and Storm and Norman Rockwell, great men, bro heroes.

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Speaker 1: Bro.

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Speaker 4: No, you were clearly thinking of General Dwight D. Eisenhower

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Speaker 4: and Storm and Norman Schwartz.

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Speaker 1: Goof No, I was clearly thinking of the best way

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Speaker 1: to dispose of your dead body.

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Speaker 3: You know, you remind me of a general Oh no, wait,

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Speaker 3: you remind me of a genital.

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Speaker 1: Oh wordplay that he's still talking? What why? What you said?

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Speaker 4: The guy who Joel Embiach shoved was a beat reporter.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and a garbage human the worst.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, he was actually a columnist, not a beat reporter.

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Speaker 4: That's an important distinction.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, Well, after the show, I'm going to take

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Speaker 1: my axe and make an important distinction between your head

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Speaker 1: and your spine.

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Speaker 3: And we all know you're an expert on beats. Just

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Speaker 3: ask your penis. Oh yeah, let's get go.

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Speaker 4: You guys said you don't listen to Taylor Swift.

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Speaker 1: Never bro, We're men, Bro.

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Speaker 4: I know you guys listen to her music. Tony, I

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Speaker 4: saw her CD on the floor of your car.

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Speaker 2: No, you know what was on the floor of my car?

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Speaker 2: Your mother, You're.

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Speaker 1: No, It's just done, Tony. We just booked officially on

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Speaker 1: the show next week, super Bowl Hero Future, Hall of

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Speaker 1: Fame and Nick Bowles. Wow right now review the show

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Speaker 1: five stars.

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Speaker 2: Subscribe by Old the Ride.

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Speaker 1: By all the Merch. Click the discription to go to

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Speaker 1: the Merch Star and don't it Great?

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Speaker 2: Job as allays same to you, Paulie. Another flawless Shaw here.

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Speaker 1: We'll see you people next week.

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Speaker 2: See U.