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Speaker 1: So of course, like I've got my laptop out and

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Speaker 1: I'm like you have to It's like and it's it's

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Speaker 1: like attached to me at this point. But you hear

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Speaker 1: all this stuff about like health issues with no I know,

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Speaker 1: your men's count, no things like that.

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Speaker 2: And say it the your uh loads. I mean, we're

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Speaker 2: about your load.

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Speaker 1: You need your loads to have a very high men's

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Speaker 1: count these days. And so I use some kind of

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Speaker 1: like a protective thing. So I'm using like a a

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Speaker 1: large tortilla mm hmmm uh to kind of serve as

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Speaker 1: like a.

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Speaker 3: Barrier corn m flower, corn flower.

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Speaker 1: Larger tilla with big bubbles, huge bubble.

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Speaker 2: That's how you know they made it right, because it

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Speaker 2: had to be so hot to bubble like that.

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Speaker 3: So you got the you got on your you know,

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Speaker 3: got a tortilla.

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Speaker 1: Just creating the sort of interference for the r if id's.

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Speaker 1: But I'm getting like these looks, and I worry, like,

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Speaker 1: is am I committing sort of a cultural faux pas?

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Speaker 1: Mm hmm, like is this bad? Like is what I'm

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Speaker 1: doing really bad?

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Speaker 4: Where?

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Speaker 3: What country was this?

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Speaker 1: It was a Zurich? But people are looking like is

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Speaker 1: this weird? Like I'm gonna have to eat this thing

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Speaker 1: or I I'm gonna have to act like I was

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Speaker 1: meant to, like roll this up and eat it. And

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Speaker 1: the the is my culture. We eat the computer at

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Speaker 1: a tortilla. I'm gonna have to eat this whole damn

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Speaker 1: thing right now. And what's this gonna do to my

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Speaker 1: men's count?

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Speaker 3: Right eating the process or.

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Speaker 1: Eat the computer?

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Speaker 3: Well, I you know, I'm sorry.

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Speaker 2: I think I got us off on that track because

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Speaker 2: I just asked. I just asked you about your men's count.

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Speaker 2: But we really do have to get into the show.

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Speaker 2: We can start the show. Well, we could start it

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Speaker 2: and Tim can weigh in on this stuff too.

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Speaker 3: I'm mean, he's you know.

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Speaker 1: Talk about the count everyone?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, what do we talk?

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Speaker 2: What?

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Speaker 1: What's your number? Fell out? What's your number? Guy?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: What is a number out of?

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Speaker 4: What? I mean? What is a men's count? Give me

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Speaker 4: some context? You I know, nothing coming into wown't want.

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Speaker 3: To just okay, okay, that's cool.

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Speaker 2: It's very respectful to you know, we do these stories

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Speaker 2: and it is a private conversation and and for the

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Speaker 2: guests to kind of come in fresh and not listen

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Speaker 2: to that part.

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Speaker 1: This is the zooms. I think I'm hanging out with

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Speaker 1: all these zoomers. It's a it's uh in the culture today,

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Speaker 1: like kids are really like these, like young adults are

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Speaker 1: really obsessed with like your the count in your like

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Speaker 1: your little swimmers.

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Speaker 3: Your men's countload, Yes.

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Speaker 4: Sperm count right, that's I think that was my first

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Speaker 4: guess as as it came up. That's what I've said, Well,

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Speaker 4: I have I have two kids. Do we need to

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Speaker 4: say anymore?

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Speaker 1: Wow?

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Speaker 2: Okay, Mike drop moment.

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Speaker 4: So no, I've had I have a five year old,

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Speaker 4: an eight year old, and since the five year old,

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Speaker 4: several abortions. I've been, oh my god, I've ye oh

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Speaker 4: mystruct instructed my wife. You know, I wouldn't say instructed,

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Speaker 4: I'd say suggested strongly.

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Speaker 3: Hey, you know this, that's marriage, right, It's her choice.

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Speaker 4: Ultimately, it's her choice, but I make her.

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Speaker 1: Feel the what are you going to say? This is?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, here's what I do. I tell her how I

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Speaker 4: feel about the situation, and then I sort of use

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Speaker 4: sort of passive aggressive techniques as she's using no time

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Speaker 4: to go, Well, I guess that means we're gonna have

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Speaker 4: to find a new house. You know. Now I'm gonna

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Speaker 4: start to start taking more jobs that I don't want

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Speaker 4: to take sucks.

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Speaker 2: I love this house. I feel you liked it too,

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Speaker 2: didn't you didn't you like living in this house?

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Speaker 4: And then she was fine, I'll go get this taken

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Speaker 4: care of of mm hmm. And that's that's happened a

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Speaker 4: few times since.

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Speaker 1: This is why this works for me. Kevin asked me,

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Speaker 1: what's wrong?

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Speaker 5: What's wrong?

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Speaker 2: Hayes Nothing?

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Speaker 1: Mm hmm like that.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I'll just nothing.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I'll just mope around the house and sigh and

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Speaker 4: just yeah, what is the matter? Because nothing. I'm just

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Speaker 4: thinking about the news you dropped on me the other

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Speaker 4: night when I was trying to fucking relax and watched

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Speaker 4: my watch the Dodgers, and you come in with this

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Speaker 4: fucking news about oh guess what we're I'm pregnant.

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Speaker 3: Oh great, Yeah, yeah, what's the matter?

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Speaker 1: Nothing?

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Speaker 2: Why does something have to be the matter? Right, I'm

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Speaker 2: just stressed about you, your body, what you're doing.

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Speaker 4: I already have we already have major like issues with

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Speaker 4: are the two kids that we too have that we do.

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Speaker 1: Have and between us yeah mm hmm.

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Speaker 4: You know, it's like not going great.

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Speaker 2: So we have huge problems that I you're doing this

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Speaker 2: so but it's fine. It's totally fine. It am I

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Speaker 2: allowed to think about it.

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Speaker 4: It's your choice. If you really want to have this baby,

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Speaker 4: this third fucking baby, then we can figure it out.

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Speaker 4: We'll figure it out. But I am personally on the

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Speaker 4: record not into it.

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Speaker 2: Make it a choice and choices of consequences. We talk

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Speaker 2: about this all.

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Speaker 1: The show's about anything, it's about the choices have consequences.

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Speaker 4: By the way, thank you guys for having me. I

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Speaker 4: love doing a podcast at five o'clock on a Friday.

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Speaker 4: It's my favorite time to commit to something. It's a great.

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Speaker 2: Time that really doesn't have zone.

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Speaker 4: It doesn't come, it doesn't create any conflicts with stuff

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Speaker 4: I had planned and everything. It's it's a perfect time.

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Speaker 2: We must like it five o'clock.

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Speaker 1: Yes for us too, having recorded at five o'clock every

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Speaker 1: day this week, and how it builds the energy ill

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Speaker 1: every episode you've got.

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Speaker 2: More and more juice. Well got more gas in the tape.

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Speaker 4: I'm surprised you guys act that because you know Fallon Kimmel,

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Speaker 4: uh Cordon. They none of these guys tape, None of

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Speaker 4: these guys on Friday.

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Speaker 3: They don't.

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Speaker 2: They don't know, they don't tape on Friday. And that's

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Speaker 2: the fucking difference. And that's it, and that's why I

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Speaker 2: were where we are there where they are.

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Speaker 1: And we'll talk about Jim in a minute.

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Speaker 4: I heard, I heard he tapes only tapes on Tuesday.

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Speaker 4: It's like a it's like a ten hour day. He

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Speaker 4: just bangs him out mm hmm, live to tape. They

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Speaker 4: book all the guests and they just cart him in

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Speaker 4: and out and it's you're done.

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Speaker 3: He's got it. They got to kind of prop him up.

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Speaker 2: They shoot him so full of fucking dope to get

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Speaker 2: him into that state so that he can do those songs.

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Speaker 2: And they've got they've got that block of about ten

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Speaker 2: hours and then he's basically comato from that till the

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Speaker 2: next record.

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Speaker 1: Till the next yeah, Tuesday at six am or or

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Speaker 1: they or he.

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Speaker 2: Gets into the stash and then you see what happened

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Speaker 2: where he's humping the car in a fucking mouse suit.

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Speaker 4: And I heard the schedule is they do they tape

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Speaker 4: all the in studio stuff on Tuesday, then they do

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Speaker 4: all the car stuff on Wednesday, and then that's this.

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Speaker 4: Then it's off from Thursday to Tuesday again or sorry, yeah,

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Speaker 4: to Thursday to Tuesday, and you know, Reggie can't be

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Speaker 4: there Thursday, frind He's got something going on at Dynasty Typewriter.

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Speaker 4: Then he's at the Smell. He's got the noise bands.

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Speaker 4: He has to check out the art galleries. He has

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Speaker 4: to stop by, So it's tough to schedule that show.

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Speaker 1: The car stuff is Cordon is on his way home,

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Speaker 1: and so they're like, okay, well he's gonna be in

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Speaker 1: the car, like we we get set up cameras there

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Speaker 1: and stuff. He's gonna be singing a little song, so

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Speaker 1: we might as well get that right.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that stuff is to and from Santa Barbara.

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Speaker 1: We will and we'll talk about Jim, but we also

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Speaker 1: want to say this is the power of your men's

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Speaker 1: count really in a way, Tim, which is that you

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Speaker 1: did this is your third time on the show, by

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Speaker 1: announcing that you wanted to schedule another appearance, you did

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Speaker 1: induce labor.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, knocked another baby out of my wife.

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Speaker 4: That is incredibly the first time I thought I thought

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Speaker 4: I'd been on the show many times. I didn't know

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Speaker 4: it was only three. I thought I've been on the

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Speaker 4: show like I was like twenty five times.

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Speaker 2: Doing the show once feels like doing a lot of episodes. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: we try to make sure you get your pill.

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Speaker 4: You know. So the first time I was on you

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Speaker 4: or Not, you were in the hospital waiting for your

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Speaker 4: wife to deliver.

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Speaker 3: I was in the hospital.

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Speaker 2: I was in the bathroom of my wife's hospital room,

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Speaker 2: and a nurse actually knocked on the door, was like,

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Speaker 2: get the fuck in here.

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Speaker 3: Your wife is having the baby.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but the nurse, it turned out the nurse head

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Speaker 1: to she had a major p moment.

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Speaker 2: That's and it was just it was a ploy to

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Speaker 2: get me out of the bathroom. But then the baby

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Speaker 2: came as well, so everybody.

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Speaker 4: A huge moment, A huge moment for you, no doubt.

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Speaker 4: Not a significant moment in my life, sort of the tidbit,

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Speaker 4: interesting little side piece of my life, you know. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: as you knew that before we started, I did not

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Speaker 4: recall that until you brought it up. I didn't put

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Speaker 4: those two things together. It took me a minute.

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Speaker 2: I went, oh, yeah, okay, and I was yeah, it

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Speaker 2: was interesting.

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Speaker 1: You you did not remember Sean calling in from the

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Speaker 1: hospital as a child was being born, but you did

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Speaker 1: remember that we talked about Hube Halloween.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. The second episode, you instant recalled for it, and

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Speaker 2: you were like, that was when we were going over

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Speaker 2: hub Halloween.

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Speaker 4: You remember, since this has become one of my favorite movies.

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Speaker 1: Age is like that, doesn't it. It's like a Greyere.

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Speaker 4: It feels like a classic Greyere feels like a classic.

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Speaker 2: Now, isn't it funny how that happens? Isn't that funny

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Speaker 2: how something comes out and you think, oh, this is

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Speaker 2: just a movie I'm watching and then just.

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Speaker 1: One of so many.

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Speaker 2: The vicious wheel of time grinds away so much and

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Speaker 2: all that is left. Then the debris, the detritus has

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Speaker 2: shuffled away, and Hubie Halloween stands alone, complete.

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Speaker 4: And now we're watching it the family and I were

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Speaker 4: watching it as a Christmas movie too, because we just

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Speaker 4: like it as a Christmas movie.

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Speaker 3: We just it's holiday.

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Speaker 2: It's holiday message, it's about holidays, like it's not. It

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Speaker 2: doesn't matter, it's fucking Halloween, whatever, Christmas, Thanksgiving?

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Speaker 4: You know.

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Speaker 2: But I did want to say, Tim, Uh, I know

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Speaker 2: that you have recently started a Patreon. We of course

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Speaker 2: have been on Patreon for a little while, and uh

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Speaker 2: to the new people joining, I always say, come on

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Speaker 2: in the waters rapidly disappearing. Yeah, there's a certain there

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Speaker 2: was a certain level of cash going into Patrions that

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Speaker 2: we got here people dropping off.

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Speaker 1: You're a set amount of money to go around, uh huh,

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Speaker 1: and everyone who comes in gets a little bit from

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Speaker 1: everyone else.

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Speaker 2: Uh. And the and the and the money.

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Speaker 1: Pool is it's just it's it's it's Scrooge mcdoc's money pool.

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Speaker 1: That's where's a.

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Speaker 2: Fixed number of adults with a fixed number of expendable

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Speaker 2: income to subscribe to comedy first.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, here's my so I thought. I mean, I've been

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Speaker 4: sort of I've delved into this pool of fan generate

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Speaker 4: or you know, fan funded stuff now that's sort of

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Speaker 4: out borne out of the pandemic. And I think just

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Speaker 4: the general direction that the business is going is if

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Speaker 4: you're going to try to do anything outside of uh,

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Speaker 4: you know, a Marvel movie or something, you kind of

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Speaker 4: have to do it on your own in certain different ways.

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Speaker 2: Actually, I don't do Marvel movie. That's yeah, right, that's

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Speaker 2: why I didn't do it.

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Speaker 4: Well do it here my here my complaints with Patreon.

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Speaker 1: Okay, hit me and this is and I just want

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Speaker 1: to say, this is Tim. Yeah, this is Tim, and

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Speaker 1: he's absolutely welcome to do this.

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Speaker 2: No I'm ready to tee off on this guy.

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Speaker 4: Here's what I want to be able.

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Speaker 1: He's not allowed to be on Patreon anymore, and like

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Speaker 1: this when he gets distributed or something that's that's Patreon,

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Speaker 1: that's there to make I understand it.

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Speaker 4: Here's what I would would hope that they can work

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Speaker 4: towards or because what I'm saying, what I'm the what

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Speaker 4: I'm fundamentally saying is it's great, and it works, and

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Speaker 4: it's pretty good at a lot of things. But here's

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Speaker 4: what they should do. They should have a an option

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Speaker 4: to bundle things together and get some kind of deal.

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Speaker 4: So if I like, if I'm and we probably have

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Speaker 4: a lot of crossover audience, I would think some like

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Speaker 4: the Best Show with Tom Sharpling. I would think the

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Speaker 4: Chapo Trap House, a few other patron universes out there, hubs.

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Speaker 4: There should be a way to go. These are my

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Speaker 4: These are my guys and gals, These are these are

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Speaker 4: the five shows that I love. I want to pay

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Speaker 4: for all of them and get like a discount or something.

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Speaker 4: And then they figured it out and they split the

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Speaker 4: money evenly. Well, yeah it's good, but that.

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Speaker 1: Matter how much? Which is like the least listen to

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Speaker 1: of that group. It doesn't even matter.

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Speaker 2: Whether you were saying you the best show Chapo and

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Speaker 2: then us. I don't know which of these popular. There's

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Speaker 2: no way for me to calculate that, and I shouldn't.

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Speaker 1: And it should not matter.

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Speaker 4: It shouldn't all content that will have to sort out

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Speaker 4: the devil. That's probably why they're we Then, hey, how

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Speaker 4: about how about can I as a Patreon UH channel?

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Speaker 4: Can I give a couple of these accounts away? Can

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Speaker 4: I send one to my friend? Can I have a

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Speaker 4: content you know what I mean? There's no way to

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Speaker 4: be like, here's a it's like a guest, like a

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Speaker 4: past to go to go to a show doesn't exist.

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Speaker 4: And so you know, these holl high rollers, they don't

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Speaker 4: want they don't sign up for anything, you know, give

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Speaker 4: them a free thing so that then they tweet about

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Speaker 4: it and talk about and go, oh this is good.

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Speaker 1: Dope. Boyce does that for us. We talked about this

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Speaker 1: a little bit. When they get a message that's like

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Speaker 1: oh my god, like your show saved my life or whatever,

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Speaker 1: like that's an automatic like laundry shoot, they send it

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Speaker 1: over to us where we will actually take care of them.

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Speaker 1: But they have no. They they say like they what

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Speaker 1: do you mean, I'm.

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Speaker 3: For wy They drop it in the incinerator.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, what do you what do you mean a free membership?

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Speaker 1: They send that the subscriber. They they cut their subscription

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Speaker 1: and they send it to us because they say.

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Speaker 2: They just don't have the band with care emotionally for

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Speaker 2: any of their listeners.

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Speaker 4: What I mean, listen, I don't know anything about the show.

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Speaker 4: I assume it's it's those guys that I probably like,

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Speaker 4: I know them, and there's.

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Speaker 1: Nothing the Birthday Boys honestly, Yeah.

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Speaker 4: But everybody seems to love it or something.

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Speaker 1: It's an anti human show. Let's talk about what we're

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Speaker 1: the sort of the future with Patreon they said it

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Speaker 1: even Did you get the email today? They're making a

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Speaker 1: lot of changes.

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Speaker 4: No, I didn't.

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Speaker 3: What is they they're shifting a little bit.

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Speaker 1: Are you kind of what you're talking about?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: It is a virtual community space. Now you you you

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Speaker 1: need to use the binoculars.

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Speaker 2: You get a meta VR.

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Speaker 3: Oh come on, yeah, you strap into it.

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Speaker 1: You jack in right, come on in the base of

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Speaker 1: the neck and you enter in there and everyone's there

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Speaker 1: like chilling out, like having a good time. You can

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Speaker 1: drink uh and they you can go ask for people,

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Speaker 1: ask people for their money individually and like they can

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Speaker 1: each subscriber can like give you their money or you

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Speaker 1: can be physical with them, you can take it. M hmm.

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Speaker 1: I wonder people I guess are forming little like like

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Speaker 1: they're like fagans and artful dodger type.

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Speaker 2: Figures, roving posse's and then like yes, networks of like

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Speaker 2: pickpockets things like this.

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Speaker 4: M it just occurred to me. It's totally maybe slightly

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Speaker 4: off subject, but do you would you ever envision Patron

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Speaker 4: the patron uh uh Patron tequila? Patron, yeah tequila.

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Speaker 3: It was formed by two guys named paton Ron, so it's.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, uh, they should get into the Patreon. There should

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Speaker 4: be some kind of co branding there. Anyways, what else

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Speaker 4: can we look forward to in this in this meta

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Speaker 4: uh metapatron world.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's kind of.

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Speaker 2: Just like a West World type scenario where it's like

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Speaker 2: you can go, yeah, you have to beat people up

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Speaker 2: if you want to get the money.

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Speaker 1: You can you can kill. You can drink that I said.

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Speaker 1: They were really stressing that you can.

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Speaker 2: They kept talking about how you can drink, but they

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Speaker 2: were saying that the drinks have like Benito flakes sprinkled

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Speaker 2: like it's like it's all these artists and cocktails. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: which is cool. But like me, guy, like me, Sometimes

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Speaker 2: I just want a fucking cold glass of SuDS.

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Speaker 4: Dog p beer PBRB tall boy.

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Speaker 2: I don't need nothing fancy tall in the same place, right,

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna piss it out later.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, sometimes I'll just crack open a tall Boy. I

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Speaker 4: got a tall Boy at the Palladium the other night,

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Speaker 4: a local beer. I think it was a domestic beer.

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Speaker 4: It was like eighteen dollars. Wow, that's a lot. That's

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Speaker 4: I mean, this is about three there's three three feet

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Speaker 4: three feet tall. Yeah, I went to a show. I

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Speaker 4: went to a show at the YouTube Theater. You've been

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Speaker 4: to the down and down to the YouTube Theater. They're

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Speaker 4: they're in Englewood. Ever been down there by the Sofi Stadium.

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Speaker 2: I like that theater a lot. I got got all

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Speaker 2: my favorite videos.

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Speaker 4: I got a round of drinks and a couple of

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Speaker 4: bags chips. One hundred dollars, gentlemen, one hundred dollars for

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Speaker 4: a round of drinks and two bags of goddamn Missus

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Speaker 4: Fields potato.

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Speaker 1: Chips or whatever they have. Cow Boys chocolate potato.

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Speaker 4: No, no, what's the potato chips? That are a woman's

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Speaker 4: name and they're they've got salt and vinegar and they're

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Speaker 4: they're sort of the upgrade.

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Speaker 2: From Vicky's, Miss Vickys.

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Speaker 4: They got Miss Vicki's there and twizzlers and everything else.

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Speaker 4: But I got a double bourbon on the rocks, a

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Speaker 4: one of those hard Seltzers, and a couple maybe another

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Speaker 4: beer and of wine and some chips.

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Speaker 1: One hundred bucks. Unbelievable that happens. I put my hands up.

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Speaker 1: I say, I don't want any trouble. Yeah, just take

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Speaker 1: just take it.

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Speaker 4: I just hand them over the credit card with the chip.

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Speaker 4: I put the chip in and they can and I

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Speaker 4: do the signing on the screen and everything. I do

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Speaker 4: the tips.

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Speaker 2: I start telling them my name, I send the names

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Speaker 2: of my kids. I go, I have a family, like, please,

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Speaker 2: don't do this, there's no need for this.

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Speaker 4: They say, you need a receipt.

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Speaker 1: I go, nah, oh yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm similar. I'm similar. I go, I go, I.

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Speaker 4: I go, K I have two you get two receipts?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? Have one?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm buying them because I have one for me.

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Speaker 3: And then I'm gonna mail one to my dad. Let

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Speaker 3: him see how good I'm doing.

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Speaker 4: You know what I say to I do this. Sometimes

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Speaker 4: they say you want to receipt it? Go yeah, can

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Speaker 4: I get two? And they go really? I go, now,

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Speaker 4: I'm fucking with you and they go, ah, I love it.

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Speaker 3: I pinch them a little bit. There's the thing that

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Speaker 3: makes it harder to do it.

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Speaker 1: But if you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'll go around sometimes go around the counter.

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Speaker 1: Well, in the Patreon community, it's a much better system,

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Speaker 1: which is you pay twenty five dollars a month, so

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Speaker 1: scription fee, you drink as much as you.

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Speaker 4: Want twenty twenty five hundred dollars a month.

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Speaker 1: Twenty five hundred dollars a month. Yes, it's built at

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Speaker 1: the top of the month, and then you can just

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Speaker 1: go absolutely crazy and then they really want you to.

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Speaker 4: I wonder, you know, there's there's only so many of

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Speaker 4: those credit card machines now, Like what are the brands

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Speaker 4: now that there's a few square square Toast toast Clover

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Speaker 4: is one. I think Clover Clover pay. I wonder if

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Speaker 4: they could make a deal with So let's say you're

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Speaker 4: like a shoe store or something and you've got the

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Speaker 4: Clover machine. That's how you take credit cards. What if

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Speaker 4: Patreon made a deal with Clover it says you get

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Speaker 4: free anything at this store is half off, you know,

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Speaker 4: we're it is that bad for the shoe store? Yeah,

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Speaker 4: but it's great for it's it's incentivizing my patrons to

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Speaker 4: go and support Clover, which is a great place to

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Speaker 4: use your credit cards. Easy.

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Speaker 2: And if and if and if they sell you know,

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Speaker 2: let's just say fifteen times as many shoes as they

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Speaker 2: were going to.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, then even as it all evens out, are you

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Speaker 4: operating this podcast at a loss?

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Speaker 1: This is the lost leader for our network?

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00:21:17,560 --> 00:21:17,720
Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, this is Yeah, this sort of brings people into

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Speaker 2: listening to us. What is the then we have we

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Speaker 2: upsell them?

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Speaker 4: What is the podcast network?

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Speaker 1: Well, we I mean we do we want to unveil

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Speaker 1: this now. I mean like yeah, like basically I don't

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Speaker 1: need to you.

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00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:42,720
Speaker 4: Don't need to unveil anything. I'm not interested in being

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Speaker 4: in any in having anything we can do.

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Speaker 2: We can do just about it.

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Speaker 3: I mean that's that's being interested.

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Speaker 4: Okay.

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Speaker 1: We well we're hedging, like we have a bunch of

445
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:54,960
Speaker 1: different irons in the fire. So we have there's the

446
00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:57,960
Speaker 1: there's the Patreon stuff. Obviously, with these changes, I'm not

447
00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:04,440
Speaker 1: really comfortable coming like yeah, like a child pickpocket or

448
00:22:04,480 --> 00:22:07,159
Speaker 1: like reading someone's ass. I could do it, and if

449
00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:09,760
Speaker 1: I can, like I can do it in this world,

450
00:22:09,840 --> 00:22:12,240
Speaker 1: I can do it in the virtual world. I can

451
00:22:12,359 --> 00:22:15,959
Speaker 1: beat so Heart. I'll send you back and forth between them.

452
00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:19,520
Speaker 1: But I'm not really comfortable. I mean, I do comedy,

453
00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:22,359
Speaker 1: like that's what I do. That's how I love, you

454
00:22:22,400 --> 00:22:22,840
Speaker 1: know what I mean?

455
00:22:22,880 --> 00:22:25,080
Speaker 2: If I wanted to just be some kind of enforcer

456
00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:30,200
Speaker 2: thug type, just strong man, you know, just punishing people,

457
00:22:30,240 --> 00:22:30,840
Speaker 2: knocking them.

458
00:22:30,840 --> 00:22:33,240
Speaker 4: Can you can you bust on the street? Can you

459
00:22:33,280 --> 00:22:36,879
Speaker 4: do stuff on the street in the in the patron metaverse?

460
00:22:37,119 --> 00:22:41,960
Speaker 1: Hmmm, here's an interesting idea. It's busking on the street,

461
00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:46,920
Speaker 1: but it's actually a really famous guy doing it, Russell BG,

462
00:22:47,880 --> 00:22:51,840
Speaker 1: Josh Brogan, and he's out there and he's actually the

463
00:22:51,920 --> 00:22:52,560
Speaker 1: one busking.

464
00:22:52,680 --> 00:22:54,480
Speaker 4: Who's Josh Brogan, Yeah.

465
00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:56,879
Speaker 2: Josh Brogan. And he's like, hey, anybody mind if I

466
00:22:56,960 --> 00:22:59,679
Speaker 2: sing a little tune. But then he starts singing like

467
00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:02,960
Speaker 2: a famous Josh Brogen song and it's like, you sound

468
00:23:03,160 --> 00:23:05,040
Speaker 2: just fucking like that guy, man.

469
00:23:06,119 --> 00:23:09,639
Speaker 1: And so this this could be great for Jim. This

470
00:23:09,680 --> 00:23:14,040
Speaker 1: would be an amazing gym segment. Okay, well should get this.

471
00:23:14,640 --> 00:23:16,600
Speaker 1: This is why I kind of we wanted to bring

472
00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:18,840
Speaker 1: you here because with these Patreon changes, obviously we're all

473
00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:22,560
Speaker 1: going to be moving on, and so the natural next

474
00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:26,600
Speaker 1: step for the three of us in this episode is

475
00:23:26,640 --> 00:23:29,000
Speaker 1: to create our cordon packet.

476
00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:32,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, so we were trying to, you know, find the

477
00:23:32,640 --> 00:23:36,800
Speaker 2: guidelines for submitting to Corton to be part of that staff.

478
00:23:37,440 --> 00:23:39,680
Speaker 2: You seem to know so much about his schedule already

479
00:23:39,680 --> 00:23:40,159
Speaker 2: and everything.

480
00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:41,720
Speaker 3: Yeahah, we thought the three of us.

481
00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:44,840
Speaker 2: As a team, you know, you're you're sort of the

482
00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:47,480
Speaker 2: name he got us. We'll be doing a lot of

483
00:23:47,520 --> 00:23:49,200
Speaker 2: the work underneath you, right.

484
00:23:49,320 --> 00:23:51,760
Speaker 4: As a writing team, a three man writing team.

485
00:23:51,920 --> 00:23:55,280
Speaker 1: So yeah, but honestly production of three production stuff too.

486
00:23:55,720 --> 00:23:59,480
Speaker 1: I seem three is diverse, it is.

487
00:23:59,600 --> 00:24:00,639
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's wondered.

488
00:24:00,680 --> 00:24:02,760
Speaker 1: How often do you see in the writers are three

489
00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:04,360
Speaker 1: people together.

490
00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:06,480
Speaker 4: Three man team. It's like they stooge It's like the

491
00:24:06,480 --> 00:24:09,240
Speaker 4: three stooges.

492
00:24:08,520 --> 00:24:11,840
Speaker 2: Right, right, and that's we could say that, say, I mean,

493
00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:13,960
Speaker 2: we should say that in the meeting, right.

494
00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:18,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, well I love that. Hayes already there. Yeah, and

495
00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:19,920
Speaker 1: Diamond Toopoulos.

496
00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:22,440
Speaker 2: Uh.

497
00:24:22,800 --> 00:24:25,800
Speaker 4: I wonder by the way, What's what's he been up to?

498
00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:28,240
Speaker 4: I'd love to do an IMDb quick search on him.

499
00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:31,960
Speaker 4: Mo from the two thousand and what is it twelve?

500
00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:33,639
Speaker 4: Three Stooges film.

501
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:36,920
Speaker 1: Wasn't that gonna be? Who was that gonna be? That everyone?

502
00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:42,640
Speaker 4: Well, it was an original Benicio Dottorial, Sean Penn and uh,

503
00:24:43,040 --> 00:24:47,920
Speaker 4: Jim Carrey. I think with what was rumored to be Ah,

504
00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:52,040
Speaker 4: I think John c Riley was, you know, smartly asked

505
00:24:52,040 --> 00:24:53,920
Speaker 4: to do Larry that would have worked out pretty good.

506
00:24:53,920 --> 00:24:54,760
Speaker 1: I think the hair.

507
00:24:56,960 --> 00:25:00,400
Speaker 4: I actually went back and watched some of that Three

508
00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:05,359
Speaker 4: Stooges movie, and no jokes, it's not that bad.

509
00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:09,440
Speaker 3: Sure, but I heard it's pretty funny.

510
00:25:09,560 --> 00:25:12,800
Speaker 4: Like they there's some core, there's some like they tried

511
00:25:12,840 --> 00:25:14,880
Speaker 4: to go with too much heart, like try to get

512
00:25:14,960 --> 00:25:16,960
Speaker 4: us to like the Three Stooges, which is not really

513
00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:18,760
Speaker 4: of interest to me.

514
00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:22,000
Speaker 1: And the steaks are very high.

515
00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:24,440
Speaker 4: The steaks are Yeah, they got to save some orphanage

516
00:25:24,440 --> 00:25:27,320
Speaker 4: I think or something. I don't know, but listen, I

517
00:25:27,359 --> 00:25:30,280
Speaker 4: have so many great ideas when it comes to late

518
00:25:30,359 --> 00:25:33,000
Speaker 4: night stuff, so I can just fire away if you want.

519
00:25:33,040 --> 00:25:36,840
Speaker 4: I mean, for for Cordon, I love first of all,

520
00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:40,960
Speaker 4: he's so likable, especially when you get to know about

521
00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:43,320
Speaker 4: him and you start talking to people that have worked

522
00:25:43,359 --> 00:25:45,359
Speaker 4: for him or have been around him. Then if he

523
00:25:45,520 --> 00:25:48,800
Speaker 4: really starts to he really is that guy. So what

524
00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:50,760
Speaker 4: I would want to do is kind of play against

525
00:25:50,760 --> 00:25:55,199
Speaker 4: that and have him work, have him go undercover, working

526
00:25:55,240 --> 00:25:58,840
Speaker 4: at a burger king or some where some slobs work, right,

527
00:25:59,280 --> 00:26:01,080
Speaker 4: and get him in the middle of the like get

528
00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:03,639
Speaker 4: him deep South or something, and he comes in as

529
00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:07,120
Speaker 4: the all right everybody, and we get him fully in prosthetic,

530
00:26:07,400 --> 00:26:12,080
Speaker 4: you know, totally disguise him, maybe go I don't want

531
00:26:12,080 --> 00:26:15,480
Speaker 4: to go blackface, but definitely changes ethnicity.

532
00:26:15,040 --> 00:26:19,320
Speaker 2: Well somewhere otherwise not that, but some other not that,

533
00:26:19,400 --> 00:26:20,640
Speaker 2: but not that one that.

534
00:26:20,520 --> 00:26:24,439
Speaker 4: We're Asian or something to do. And he comes in

535
00:26:24,520 --> 00:26:27,200
Speaker 4: maybe as the Asian. This is a this is actually

536
00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:30,439
Speaker 4: really funny. He comes in, We go to like a

537
00:26:30,760 --> 00:26:35,160
Speaker 4: what's a Chinese food fast food place like uh Pan Express,

538
00:26:35,240 --> 00:26:39,120
Speaker 4: Pan Express? Perfect. Yeah, he goes. We find some fucking

539
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:42,760
Speaker 4: Panda Express by the airport and like Indianapolis or some bullshit,

540
00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:45,520
Speaker 4: you know, just something like by the airport. We're just

541
00:26:45,560 --> 00:26:48,399
Speaker 4: a bunch of losers are working there and they you know,

542
00:26:49,040 --> 00:26:52,480
Speaker 4: they suck they're idiots, and we get him a full

543
00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:57,880
Speaker 4: Chinese prosthetic face, you know, yeah, and we go in

544
00:26:57,920 --> 00:27:00,400
Speaker 4: there and he starts and with a funny yeah, I'm

545
00:27:00,400 --> 00:27:03,320
Speaker 4: not gonna do it now, but you can James.

546
00:27:03,359 --> 00:27:06,320
Speaker 3: Leave that to James the man.

547
00:27:06,760 --> 00:27:08,440
Speaker 4: But he comes in as the listen, get this. You

548
00:27:08,480 --> 00:27:12,000
Speaker 4: guys are gonna love this. The president CEO of Panda

549
00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:17,720
Speaker 4: Express comes straight from Beijing or wherever, and he is

550
00:27:17,760 --> 00:27:21,520
Speaker 4: on a war path. He just found out about some somebody,

551
00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:23,960
Speaker 4: you know. He finds some kid, let's say, some fifteen

552
00:27:24,040 --> 00:27:27,119
Speaker 4: year old kid working minimum wage part time, you know,

553
00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:31,120
Speaker 4: to the fucking more guy with the mop and everything.

554
00:27:31,160 --> 00:27:33,040
Speaker 4: He's cleaning the ship. At the end of the he

555
00:27:33,760 --> 00:27:37,720
Speaker 4: accuses this kid of stealing. He accuses of of stealing,

556
00:27:38,119 --> 00:27:40,360
Speaker 4: and they take him and put him. Put this kid

557
00:27:40,440 --> 00:27:43,639
Speaker 4: in a limo or something some like black van, you know,

558
00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:46,400
Speaker 4: put a fucking bag over his head and say I'm

559
00:27:46,400 --> 00:27:48,199
Speaker 4: taking you back to I'm taking you to one of

560
00:27:48,200 --> 00:27:51,360
Speaker 4: our Chinese concentration camps where the wigers go right.

561
00:27:51,480 --> 00:27:54,080
Speaker 2: Wow, empty gun against the you know.

562
00:27:54,320 --> 00:27:58,960
Speaker 4: Yes, yes, hands tied behind his back. Yeah. And then

563
00:27:59,040 --> 00:28:01,719
Speaker 4: we put him in some sound stage or something, some

564
00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:04,359
Speaker 4: some simulated thing and we get the sound of the

565
00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:08,760
Speaker 4: aircraft carry or the big DC ten plane, you know.

566
00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:12,080
Speaker 4: And then meanwhile, cart Gordon's just reaming him right into the.

567
00:28:12,280 --> 00:28:16,040
Speaker 3: You'll think it gets heal from you, motherfucker right.

568
00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:18,560
Speaker 2: Oh and then and then no, no, no, no no,

569
00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:19,480
Speaker 2: you let me finish.

570
00:28:19,720 --> 00:28:22,680
Speaker 4: Then you can punch this up. Then we get him

571
00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:25,600
Speaker 4: to the stage on Tuesday and we say, all right,

572
00:28:25,600 --> 00:28:26,879
Speaker 4: you're this where you're gonna live for the rest of

573
00:28:26,920 --> 00:28:29,280
Speaker 4: your life, you pathetic piece of shit. You'll be mopping

574
00:28:29,359 --> 00:28:33,520
Speaker 4: up the Wigers pissing ship all day and night. And

575
00:28:34,160 --> 00:28:36,200
Speaker 4: we open the door and where is he? But he's

576
00:28:36,200 --> 00:28:38,600
Speaker 4: on the stage And there he is in the center stage,

577
00:28:38,680 --> 00:28:40,600
Speaker 4: right in front of a million people watching at home.

578
00:28:40,840 --> 00:28:45,360
Speaker 4: Oh and then he's like, uh what you know? And

579
00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:50,120
Speaker 4: he's then he starts crying. Yeah, and Cordon rips off

580
00:28:50,160 --> 00:28:53,600
Speaker 4: the Chinese man's mask and a everyone's laughing.

581
00:28:54,600 --> 00:28:57,120
Speaker 1: But it's nice, like it's really well, that's the thing.

582
00:28:57,040 --> 00:28:59,520
Speaker 4: Is he gets We give him a million dollars.

583
00:28:59,400 --> 00:29:01,120
Speaker 2: And his favorite yeah not a millionaire.

584
00:29:01,280 --> 00:29:03,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, we make him the manager of the fucking

585
00:29:04,520 --> 00:29:05,560
Speaker 4: Chinese place. Who cares?

586
00:29:05,600 --> 00:29:08,040
Speaker 2: That's bad? Yeah? Then if like Siya came out and

587
00:29:08,040 --> 00:29:12,360
Speaker 2: did chandelier for him or something yeah, yeah, yes.

588
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:14,640
Speaker 4: Or tickets to Hamilton or something like that. Yeah, you

589
00:29:14,680 --> 00:29:16,200
Speaker 4: get them to yeae Hamilton.

590
00:29:16,600 --> 00:29:21,040
Speaker 1: That's really nice, kind of doubtails. Like I think he

591
00:29:21,080 --> 00:29:23,040
Speaker 1: did that segment for a little while where he would

592
00:29:23,080 --> 00:29:26,640
Speaker 1: eat like traditional Asian foods and like throw up. Oh

593
00:29:26,720 --> 00:29:29,760
Speaker 1: yeah yeah you remember he was like, this is so discussing.

594
00:29:29,560 --> 00:29:31,640
Speaker 4: Bah yeah yeah yeah yeah.

595
00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:34,160
Speaker 1: So this is almost like this is making up for

596
00:29:35,400 --> 00:29:36,560
Speaker 1: that and like, well, and.

597
00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:38,560
Speaker 2: I was saying that this food is so good that

598
00:29:38,640 --> 00:29:41,200
Speaker 2: if you steal it, you'll be shipped off to a concentration.

599
00:29:41,360 --> 00:29:43,480
Speaker 4: And what I love is the network. I mean, Corton's

600
00:29:43,480 --> 00:29:46,480
Speaker 4: gonna love it, but the network is going to flip

601
00:29:46,600 --> 00:29:48,320
Speaker 4: and they're gonna say you can't do this, you can't

602
00:29:48,360 --> 00:29:50,960
Speaker 4: do that, and but that. But that's why I think

603
00:29:50,960 --> 00:29:54,360
Speaker 4: we should go in with the most hardcore, crazy ideas

604
00:29:54,360 --> 00:29:57,000
Speaker 4: and let them. Let them be the ones to do.

605
00:29:57,200 --> 00:29:59,800
Speaker 2: We're the artists. It's their job to kind of rain

606
00:30:00,080 --> 00:30:02,120
Speaker 2: us in. But we give them the wild version. And

607
00:30:02,160 --> 00:30:05,960
Speaker 2: by the way, if it's funny, mister James is gonna

608
00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:08,840
Speaker 2: give them a big old fuck you when they send

609
00:30:08,840 --> 00:30:09,640
Speaker 2: their little notes.

610
00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:19,479
Speaker 1: Kevin, is this like is this part of the like

611
00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:21,720
Speaker 1: what they is there a kind of or is there

612
00:30:21,760 --> 00:30:24,560
Speaker 1: something where they like take people away? Like is that

613
00:30:24,640 --> 00:30:26,880
Speaker 1: like a category.

614
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:29,600
Speaker 5: I'm saying like monologue jokes, So this kind of could

615
00:30:29,680 --> 00:30:33,920
Speaker 5: start as a that Yeah, it could start like as

616
00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:37,440
Speaker 5: a very like powerful monologue that like turns into this like.

617
00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:39,920
Speaker 2: Jesus, I mean I'm just shooting.

618
00:30:39,960 --> 00:30:42,800
Speaker 1: Is there a monologue submission where we're like, something really

619
00:30:42,840 --> 00:30:46,320
Speaker 1: bad happened and we can't do the normal monologue that

620
00:30:46,320 --> 00:30:46,840
Speaker 1: that night?

621
00:30:47,720 --> 00:30:54,400
Speaker 2: Yes, I like this where it's like, yeah, that whatever

622
00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:58,960
Speaker 2: Texas has decided to like shoot everybody like and you

623
00:30:59,160 --> 00:31:03,280
Speaker 2: just go like, hey, we can't talk about Yeah we can't.

624
00:31:03,560 --> 00:31:04,200
Speaker 3: I'm sorry.

625
00:31:04,560 --> 00:31:06,320
Speaker 2: I know what you come here for is you could

626
00:31:06,360 --> 00:31:08,800
Speaker 2: come out and make you laugh your fucking dick off

627
00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:12,560
Speaker 2: with these extremely well crafted jokes delivered by a winning

628
00:31:12,640 --> 00:31:17,280
Speaker 2: professional comedian. But tonight we got to talk about something

629
00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:19,800
Speaker 2: really really serious that happened.

630
00:31:19,640 --> 00:31:22,440
Speaker 1: Or if like the Challenger happened again or something like

631
00:31:22,560 --> 00:31:23,240
Speaker 1: the Challenger.

632
00:31:23,440 --> 00:31:26,480
Speaker 4: Yeah, well what about like another way of thinking about

633
00:31:26,520 --> 00:31:29,760
Speaker 4: this is just tape like an evergreen that kind of

634
00:31:29,920 --> 00:31:33,560
Speaker 4: can don't get stuff, don't get specific, and it could

635
00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:37,520
Speaker 4: be like listen, it's been a tough day. I don't

636
00:31:37,560 --> 00:31:40,520
Speaker 4: know if this is the right time for me to

637
00:31:40,520 --> 00:31:43,320
Speaker 4: be up there acting like a clown, you know. And

638
00:31:43,360 --> 00:31:47,040
Speaker 4: there'll be talk, there'll be a time for jokes again,

639
00:31:47,160 --> 00:31:51,080
Speaker 4: you know, tomorrow, next day. But right now, my thoughts

640
00:31:51,360 --> 00:31:56,120
Speaker 4: are with what happened today and how do we and

641
00:31:56,160 --> 00:31:58,120
Speaker 4: how do we? Don't even say victims, because who.

642
00:31:57,960 --> 00:32:01,040
Speaker 2: Knows, Yeah, it could just be yeah, but you would.

643
00:32:00,800 --> 00:32:04,800
Speaker 4: Say my thoughts were what happened today and how as

644
00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:07,800
Speaker 4: a as a people do we move forward? How do

645
00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:10,560
Speaker 4: we move forward? You know how?

646
00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:13,520
Speaker 1: You know how with all of you?

647
00:32:13,680 --> 00:32:17,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's pretty good. And then then you could PLoP

648
00:32:17,080 --> 00:32:18,760
Speaker 4: that in whenever anything goes down.

649
00:32:19,280 --> 00:32:21,480
Speaker 2: I think there could be something interesting for him too,

650
00:32:21,960 --> 00:32:27,600
Speaker 2: of saying like as a you know, as I wasn't

651
00:32:27,600 --> 00:32:30,680
Speaker 2: born here, uh yeah, yeah, and someone who has a

652
00:32:30,720 --> 00:32:33,160
Speaker 2: you know, a unique perspective on the American dream.

653
00:32:34,040 --> 00:32:36,480
Speaker 4: I love it. I love Americans so much.

654
00:32:36,560 --> 00:32:39,960
Speaker 3: And then what it stands for such.

655
00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:43,160
Speaker 4: An honor always to be here and be in your

656
00:32:43,200 --> 00:32:48,880
Speaker 4: homes that when something like what happened today happens, it's

657
00:32:49,040 --> 00:32:51,960
Speaker 4: as hard on me as it is on you. Yeah,

658
00:32:52,880 --> 00:32:55,720
Speaker 4: And for that, I say, let's.

659
00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:56,880
Speaker 2: Here's a music here's.

660
00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:02,520
Speaker 4: Who could be the guest. Uh eder Ed Sheerans is

661
00:33:02,560 --> 00:33:03,360
Speaker 4: gonna play a song.

662
00:33:03,760 --> 00:33:05,640
Speaker 2: He's gonna play Black bud By the Beatles.

663
00:33:05,680 --> 00:33:08,000
Speaker 4: He's gonna play bad. He's gonna do black food.

664
00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:08,600
Speaker 3: I think he.

665
00:33:08,800 --> 00:33:11,160
Speaker 2: I think he and Ed Sharon could do Imagine together

666
00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:15,520
Speaker 2: and he would do most of the singing. Is uh.

667
00:33:15,840 --> 00:33:19,880
Speaker 4: This is one after nine or nine from the Beatles,

668
00:33:19,880 --> 00:33:21,200
Speaker 4: the beautiful version of it.

669
00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:24,840
Speaker 2: Piggies, It's just piggies.

670
00:33:26,440 --> 00:33:33,080
Speaker 4: Have you seen the little piggies in this starch white ship. Yeah.

671
00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:35,440
Speaker 4: I think that we should give him that those options.

672
00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:37,200
Speaker 4: I think he's be thrilled to know that he was

673
00:33:38,800 --> 00:33:41,440
Speaker 4: able to he could bank those and use him whatever

674
00:33:41,480 --> 00:33:42,040
Speaker 4: he wants.

675
00:33:43,640 --> 00:33:46,840
Speaker 1: Okay, so we have that. That's the monologue set, Like

676
00:33:46,920 --> 00:33:51,880
Speaker 1: that's locked in. Anything out? And where is there's there

677
00:33:51,920 --> 00:33:54,760
Speaker 1: like a website? Is there like a form that we

678
00:33:54,840 --> 00:33:55,400
Speaker 1: submit on?

679
00:33:56,240 --> 00:33:56,480
Speaker 4: Yeah?

680
00:33:56,560 --> 00:33:58,280
Speaker 2: Do we fill it in or we just kind of

681
00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:01,840
Speaker 2: do we send it to you? That can't be right, Kevin.

682
00:34:02,200 --> 00:34:04,160
Speaker 1: We could probably like tweet.

683
00:34:03,840 --> 00:34:06,320
Speaker 5: It at him or like try to DM it to him.

684
00:34:06,880 --> 00:34:10,640
Speaker 4: I'd rather go through our our go through our team,

685
00:34:10,719 --> 00:34:12,880
Speaker 4: you know, go through our reps.

686
00:34:13,640 --> 00:34:15,360
Speaker 2: Okay, that's the move.

687
00:34:15,960 --> 00:34:22,200
Speaker 4: That's the move go through our reps, yeah, because then

688
00:34:22,200 --> 00:34:26,399
Speaker 4: it's official. Then it's like a oh shit, you have

689
00:34:26,520 --> 00:34:27,080
Speaker 4: the packet.

690
00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:29,520
Speaker 1: Now you're like sitting up. At that point, you're like

691
00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:31,560
Speaker 1: huh you know, You're like, now you're sitting up and

692
00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:34,160
Speaker 1: paying attention. You know, when the team is coming for you.

693
00:34:34,520 --> 00:34:38,400
Speaker 4: My reps will go like, uh calls, let's call uh

694
00:34:38,640 --> 00:34:43,360
Speaker 4: Jane over there at the Kevin at the uh James

695
00:34:43,360 --> 00:34:46,120
Speaker 4: Gordon offices. Because I just wanted to give you a

696
00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:49,120
Speaker 4: heads up that I'm sending over a packet by the

697
00:34:49,160 --> 00:34:55,279
Speaker 4: new Three Stooges and it's really really strong stuff, Tim,

698
00:34:55,280 --> 00:34:55,759
Speaker 4: And you'll know.

699
00:34:55,800 --> 00:34:58,359
Speaker 2: I've loved all your ideas so far. Can I get

700
00:34:58,400 --> 00:35:01,360
Speaker 2: Can I give you a different perspective on just this

701
00:35:01,520 --> 00:35:05,080
Speaker 2: aspect of it? Wouldn't it be cool if post the

702
00:35:05,160 --> 00:35:08,600
Speaker 2: Three Stooges kind of designing what becomes the voice of

703
00:35:08,640 --> 00:35:11,319
Speaker 2: the show, that the story of how we got the

704
00:35:11,440 --> 00:35:16,280
Speaker 2: job is some unique, crazy prank that we pulled on James,

705
00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:20,560
Speaker 2: where like we went in posing as uh, you know,

706
00:35:20,800 --> 00:35:25,200
Speaker 2: three water cooler, you know, crystal geyser delivered.

707
00:35:24,840 --> 00:35:27,000
Speaker 4: Ah yeah, yeah, that's not best.

708
00:35:26,719 --> 00:35:29,160
Speaker 2: Sparklets man here And it's like, oh wait, I was

709
00:35:29,160 --> 00:35:31,680
Speaker 2: the sparklets man, and we start this big fist fight

710
00:35:32,080 --> 00:35:34,440
Speaker 2: and as I like punch, Hazy spits out one of

711
00:35:34,440 --> 00:35:38,120
Speaker 2: his teeth, and the tooth is our packet. It like unfolds,

712
00:35:38,200 --> 00:35:40,880
Speaker 2: you know, and becomes our ideas. And then I go,

713
00:35:40,920 --> 00:35:43,359
Speaker 2: holy shit, what the fuck is why'd your tooth do that?

714
00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:45,840
Speaker 2: I guess we better read it. And then we're and

715
00:35:45,880 --> 00:35:49,200
Speaker 2: then we're performing, we're doing the song, we're doing piggies.

716
00:35:48,920 --> 00:35:52,040
Speaker 4: Orthing like that. Well, listen, I know a little. I know.

717
00:35:52,120 --> 00:35:54,359
Speaker 4: I used to know a PA that worked there, and

718
00:35:54,600 --> 00:35:58,160
Speaker 4: this could be a little more interesting. I don't know

719
00:35:58,200 --> 00:36:00,720
Speaker 4: if this is I don't think this is public knowledge,

720
00:36:00,719 --> 00:36:04,640
Speaker 4: but I'll spill the beans here. James Gordon wears diapers

721
00:36:04,960 --> 00:36:07,840
Speaker 4: and like you know, they say President Trump used to

722
00:36:07,840 --> 00:36:12,919
Speaker 4: wear diapers normal, most incontinent, but he's so hup, he's

723
00:36:12,960 --> 00:36:17,479
Speaker 4: so high, ash lines so up there, it's very it's

724
00:36:17,520 --> 00:36:20,960
Speaker 4: treated like, uh, he's kind of treated like a baby there.

725
00:36:21,000 --> 00:36:24,359
Speaker 4: So he has dipe. He has his diapers changed by

726
00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:26,280
Speaker 4: a dedicated production assistant.

727
00:36:26,360 --> 00:36:30,200
Speaker 1: Right, this was you you actually you know this person?

728
00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:32,200
Speaker 4: I know, No, I don't know the person that changed

729
00:36:32,239 --> 00:36:35,640
Speaker 4: the diapers. Yeah, yeah, but.

730
00:36:35,560 --> 00:36:39,120
Speaker 1: They work closely with them. For all the pas work together.

731
00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:42,120
Speaker 4: They all know, they all know, and but that person

732
00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:44,200
Speaker 4: is that's really all they're there to do is change

733
00:36:44,200 --> 00:36:47,359
Speaker 4: his diapers. When he gets in, he's his diapers are full,

734
00:36:47,440 --> 00:36:51,520
Speaker 4: so they change him then and then after schedule, like

735
00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:54,640
Speaker 4: three or four times he he he makes a mess

736
00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:59,239
Speaker 4: in his diapers. Uh, not always two, but sometimes you

737
00:36:59,239 --> 00:37:01,719
Speaker 4: know a little bit both or just.

738
00:37:01,680 --> 00:37:03,080
Speaker 3: Like yeah, that fart or something.

739
00:37:03,160 --> 00:37:03,759
Speaker 2: Yeah.

740
00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:06,000
Speaker 4: So what I mean, if you're up for this, I

741
00:37:06,040 --> 00:37:08,160
Speaker 4: think the diaper boys are going to be showing up

742
00:37:08,200 --> 00:37:11,360
Speaker 4: there with the new uh a new supply of diapers,

743
00:37:11,400 --> 00:37:14,040
Speaker 4: because there there was. They're the old fashioned kind, the

744
00:37:14,160 --> 00:37:17,879
Speaker 4: cotton ones, you know, because he's an environmental freak, so

745
00:37:17,960 --> 00:37:21,000
Speaker 4: they're they're they're the kinds that you that you get

746
00:37:21,160 --> 00:37:21,879
Speaker 4: washed and take.

747
00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:25,839
Speaker 2: And then yes, the PA is like, oh god, we're

748
00:37:25,880 --> 00:37:28,399
Speaker 2: all out of diapers. Nobody washed them. And then it's

749
00:37:28,440 --> 00:37:32,359
Speaker 2: like we come. Somebody rolls in the big laundry thing

750
00:37:33,160 --> 00:37:36,360
Speaker 2: and we pop out, Yeah we're all wearing diapers.

751
00:37:37,000 --> 00:37:39,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, well no, we don't need to be wearing diapers.

752
00:37:39,719 --> 00:37:43,480
Speaker 2: No we're not wearing No, we're not wearing absolutely no, no, no,

753
00:37:43,719 --> 00:37:47,000
Speaker 2: why would we we why would we I'm not in

754
00:37:47,040 --> 00:37:47,520
Speaker 2: a diaper.

755
00:37:47,880 --> 00:37:50,400
Speaker 4: I feel like we would be in like jumpsuits, like

756
00:37:50,440 --> 00:37:54,120
Speaker 4: white you know, workman jump like painters suits, or we're.

757
00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:56,960
Speaker 2: In jumpsuits, no diapers, no underwear at all. And we're well,

758
00:37:57,000 --> 00:37:58,600
Speaker 2: we would wear I would wear him, I.

759
00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:02,080
Speaker 4: Would, I would, I'd wear under I'd wear normal underclothes.

760
00:38:02,160 --> 00:38:04,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, T shirt yeah, And we can't and we can't.

761
00:38:04,160 --> 00:38:04,960
Speaker 2: We can figure that out.

762
00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:08,080
Speaker 1: Part we're so we're pooping and pink right in our underwear.

763
00:38:08,120 --> 00:38:10,200
Speaker 4: No no, no, no, that's what James is up to.

764
00:38:10,400 --> 00:38:12,640
Speaker 4: That's what he is up to. We're just changing him.

765
00:38:12,840 --> 00:38:16,640
Speaker 4: And as we're changing him, we say, hey, James, we're

766
00:38:16,680 --> 00:38:18,680
Speaker 4: the new guys, but also wanted to share some of

767
00:38:18,719 --> 00:38:21,200
Speaker 4: our comedy ideas with you. And then he goes gut

768
00:38:21,239 --> 00:38:25,360
Speaker 4: White a minute security security. And as security is coming,

769
00:38:25,600 --> 00:38:28,319
Speaker 4: we're telling him about the Panda Express idea, We're telling

770
00:38:28,400 --> 00:38:32,120
Speaker 4: him about the Evergreen monologue, and as soon as security

771
00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:36,120
Speaker 4: gets there, he goes hold one moment, wait outside and

772
00:38:36,160 --> 00:38:40,600
Speaker 4: he's security guard's still there. He still might pull pull

773
00:38:40,680 --> 00:38:42,440
Speaker 4: us out by the back of our hair, you know,

774
00:38:42,560 --> 00:38:45,640
Speaker 4: but uh, we win him over. I think we'll win

775
00:38:45,760 --> 00:38:46,080
Speaker 4: him over.

776
00:38:46,239 --> 00:38:48,759
Speaker 1: And then we get the job security is the security

777
00:38:48,800 --> 00:38:52,120
Speaker 1: guard being really into it, Like the security guard's laughing,

778
00:38:52,160 --> 00:38:54,799
Speaker 1: and James feels like he's actually lost touch a little bit.

779
00:38:54,920 --> 00:38:58,680
Speaker 1: Yeah with this guy, this like this guy's dirt to

780
00:38:58,760 --> 00:38:59,600
Speaker 1: him base what if?

781
00:39:00,120 --> 00:39:02,040
Speaker 4: What a bit? What about this? What if? As we're

782
00:39:02,080 --> 00:39:06,520
Speaker 4: telling James's ideas, he's real pissed it at us at first,

783
00:39:06,719 --> 00:39:09,319
Speaker 4: but then he's warming up. As we're getting warm, as

784
00:39:09,320 --> 00:39:11,879
Speaker 4: we're getting into it, doing sort of acting things out,

785
00:39:12,080 --> 00:39:16,000
Speaker 4: he starts chuckling, and he starts laughing, the laughters growing, growing, growing,

786
00:39:16,200 --> 00:39:18,120
Speaker 4: and of course he's on his back, fully nude, with

787
00:39:18,160 --> 00:39:21,600
Speaker 4: his diapers off. He's laughed so loud, so hard, he

788
00:39:21,640 --> 00:39:24,000
Speaker 4: starts peeing up and he's peeing up like a geyser.

789
00:39:24,400 --> 00:39:27,520
Speaker 4: And say, we all are peeing in his Not no, no, no,

790
00:39:27,560 --> 00:39:30,279
Speaker 4: not all of us. I'm saying, he's peeing and he's

791
00:39:30,320 --> 00:39:33,759
Speaker 4: peeing in our face, and and we don't care because

792
00:39:33,760 --> 00:39:34,600
Speaker 4: we're getting the job.

793
00:39:34,680 --> 00:39:37,640
Speaker 2: We know, we're getting that, yeah, we know. And the

794
00:39:37,760 --> 00:39:41,760
Speaker 2: security shows me. He goes security, thank god you're here. Yeah,

795
00:39:41,760 --> 00:39:45,879
Speaker 2: throw me out for not recognizing the genius his who

796
00:39:45,960 --> 00:39:46,640
Speaker 2: came to d.

797
00:39:48,960 --> 00:39:51,240
Speaker 4: And then of course as a button as a capper

798
00:39:51,320 --> 00:39:54,360
Speaker 4: here as we're leaving, all right, we'll see on Monday.

799
00:39:54,360 --> 00:39:56,120
Speaker 4: Boss can't wait to get to work. He goes, aren't

800
00:39:56,120 --> 00:39:58,879
Speaker 4: you forgetting something? And it's his dirty diapers?

801
00:39:59,200 --> 00:40:02,399
Speaker 2: Oh, still got to do, still got to do the job.

802
00:40:04,320 --> 00:40:05,240
Speaker 2: We take it home.

803
00:40:05,680 --> 00:40:06,239
Speaker 4: I love it.

804
00:40:06,680 --> 00:40:08,560
Speaker 1: Which one of us will get it though, because like

805
00:40:09,080 --> 00:40:11,919
Speaker 1: the diaper, how do we decide and this actually who

806
00:40:11,920 --> 00:40:16,560
Speaker 1: gets payment structure and stuff like who's going to get

807
00:40:16,560 --> 00:40:17,080
Speaker 1: the diaper?

808
00:40:18,960 --> 00:40:23,600
Speaker 4: Who's going to get the diaper? When he gets I

809
00:40:23,640 --> 00:40:26,480
Speaker 4: think in my mind it cuts there and we never

810
00:40:28,080 --> 00:40:30,120
Speaker 4: like in our in the reality and.

811
00:40:30,760 --> 00:40:31,239
Speaker 1: Just a code.

812
00:40:31,360 --> 00:40:33,440
Speaker 2: It's like a post credits like if you stick around,

813
00:40:33,480 --> 00:40:35,000
Speaker 2: you get to see who keeps the diaper?

814
00:40:35,320 --> 00:40:37,840
Speaker 4: Yeah, you don't play that through in the real world,

815
00:40:38,040 --> 00:40:41,560
Speaker 4: you know it just it's just once he says, aren't

816
00:40:41,560 --> 00:40:44,919
Speaker 4: you're forgetting something? We go we got it? Okay, good,

817
00:40:45,000 --> 00:40:47,360
Speaker 4: all right, thanks James, thanks for the opportunity to see Monday.

818
00:40:49,120 --> 00:40:51,480
Speaker 4: I think that's I think that's kind of all we

819
00:40:51,520 --> 00:40:52,280
Speaker 4: need Tuesday.

820
00:40:52,520 --> 00:40:59,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, Kevin, uh is that? Where is that to what

821
00:40:59,560 --> 00:41:01,600
Speaker 1: he wants? Yeah?

822
00:41:01,760 --> 00:41:06,360
Speaker 5: That seems really good and I think that would be

823
00:41:06,440 --> 00:41:11,359
Speaker 5: like a very powerful segment as well as this other

824
00:41:11,920 --> 00:41:14,120
Speaker 5: genius one I didn't know if you guys know about

825
00:41:14,280 --> 00:41:15,719
Speaker 5: cell phone profile?

826
00:41:16,320 --> 00:41:20,960
Speaker 1: Have you guys heard it is self? What isfile? Yeah? Sorry,

827
00:41:21,200 --> 00:41:22,760
Speaker 1: you don't know about cell phone profile?

828
00:41:22,840 --> 00:41:23,360
Speaker 4: Do you not know?

829
00:41:23,520 --> 00:41:23,759
Speaker 1: Do you?

830
00:41:23,800 --> 00:41:23,960
Speaker 4: Did?

831
00:41:24,000 --> 00:41:25,759
Speaker 3: You really not know cell phone profile? Or is this

832
00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:27,280
Speaker 3: one of your character things?

833
00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:29,000
Speaker 4: Uh, cell phone profile?

834
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:33,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, a home.

835
00:41:34,640 --> 00:41:37,759
Speaker 4: Cell phone profile.

836
00:41:37,760 --> 00:41:40,239
Speaker 2: I'll just me I'll just tell you the.

837
00:41:40,320 --> 00:41:41,720
Speaker 4: Band is a band.

838
00:41:42,080 --> 00:41:46,600
Speaker 5: James is presented, uh with a song phone and text

839
00:41:46,640 --> 00:41:50,560
Speaker 5: message from one of the phones of the multiple guests,

840
00:41:50,600 --> 00:41:52,759
Speaker 5: and he has to guess which one it is.

841
00:41:53,040 --> 00:41:56,440
Speaker 4: Okay, okay, okay.

842
00:41:56,760 --> 00:42:02,080
Speaker 3: Oh, he's like a detective. Okay, Yeah, that's awesome.

843
00:42:02,480 --> 00:42:05,279
Speaker 5: So like he did that with the cast of Huntsman's

844
00:42:05,320 --> 00:42:07,719
Speaker 5: Winter's War and like they all lost it.

845
00:42:07,920 --> 00:42:11,920
Speaker 1: So I don't know they famously that's famous when they

846
00:42:12,920 --> 00:42:16,960
Speaker 1: I mean, that's that's the Huntsman Winter's War episode, Chris.

847
00:42:18,120 --> 00:42:20,200
Speaker 1: So we could do that. We could come up with

848
00:42:20,280 --> 00:42:25,040
Speaker 1: some people can do cell phone profile about absolutely.

849
00:42:25,080 --> 00:42:28,000
Speaker 2: We may probably would have to write some of what

850
00:42:28,040 --> 00:42:31,759
Speaker 2: their text messages are too, okay, and what their song is.

851
00:42:33,520 --> 00:42:34,279
Speaker 4: Yeah, let's hit it.

852
00:42:34,400 --> 00:42:37,480
Speaker 1: And then we could look at like just like movies.

853
00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:42,000
Speaker 1: I'm looking up like movies coming out. There's Morbius. There's

854
00:42:42,040 --> 00:42:44,800
Speaker 1: a movie called Morbius coming out soon that.

855
00:42:44,680 --> 00:42:48,880
Speaker 2: Could be fucking epic. We cell phone profile Morbius.

856
00:42:48,960 --> 00:42:54,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, oh damn yeah yeah yeah, I don't know. I

857
00:42:54,040 --> 00:42:57,000
Speaker 4: don't think we have enough time. I feel like they're like,

858
00:42:57,120 --> 00:42:58,480
Speaker 4: we'd probably go all night.

859
00:42:59,160 --> 00:43:00,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, you gotta go.

860
00:43:02,200 --> 00:43:05,799
Speaker 4: Yeah, I do have to go. Yeah tell me, but no,

861
00:43:06,320 --> 00:43:08,520
Speaker 4: so like fucking soulf profile.

862
00:43:08,560 --> 00:43:11,759
Speaker 6: I was just thinking, like we could do literally anybody,

863
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:19,719
Speaker 6: anybody like, uh what about uh uh oh shit.

864
00:43:20,040 --> 00:43:22,040
Speaker 4: You got you guys are about to lose. You're gonna

865
00:43:22,040 --> 00:43:23,080
Speaker 4: lose your ship when I.

866
00:43:23,360 --> 00:43:25,760
Speaker 3: Got something, I can see when he's got something.

867
00:43:26,040 --> 00:43:32,080
Speaker 4: See motherfucking tea. I'm talking Channing Tatum.

868
00:43:31,760 --> 00:43:36,360
Speaker 1: Baby, Channing Tatum. He could be good. Oh oh he

869
00:43:36,400 --> 00:43:39,719
Speaker 1: could know, he could be really funny. Cell phone profile, no,

870
00:43:39,960 --> 00:43:41,760
Speaker 1: get cell phone profiled?

871
00:43:43,840 --> 00:43:48,720
Speaker 4: What about what about Tad motherfuckerd what about Tad Lasso?

872
00:43:49,480 --> 00:43:53,480
Speaker 1: Tad profile? Dude?

873
00:43:53,719 --> 00:43:55,440
Speaker 4: Do you know what that would do? That would fucking

874
00:43:55,719 --> 00:43:59,000
Speaker 4: blow up the internet? That would be like what Tad

875
00:43:59,080 --> 00:44:04,000
Speaker 4: Lazo's on cell phone profile? Now, okay, I'm in Oh God,

876
00:44:04,239 --> 00:44:08,719
Speaker 4: And this heart heart heart heart heart heart heart retweet retweet,

877
00:44:09,200 --> 00:44:10,120
Speaker 4: like like like.

878
00:44:10,239 --> 00:44:12,680
Speaker 2: The text messages like you can go home again and

879
00:44:12,760 --> 00:44:15,120
Speaker 2: sometimes going home is fucking awesome.

880
00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:19,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, baby, Okay, what if it's like cell phone profile?

881
00:44:19,160 --> 00:44:21,240
Speaker 1: What are the things a song and what else?

882
00:44:21,480 --> 00:44:22,880
Speaker 5: A text message in a photo?

883
00:44:23,120 --> 00:44:25,680
Speaker 1: Song, a text message in a photo. Okay, So the

884
00:44:25,680 --> 00:44:30,080
Speaker 1: photo is like an eagle and the text messages like

885
00:44:30,880 --> 00:44:33,080
Speaker 1: hail to the Chief, and the song is also hail

886
00:44:33,160 --> 00:44:35,160
Speaker 1: to the Chief. And James is like, well, I don't know.

887
00:44:35,200 --> 00:44:38,240
Speaker 1: They're like, oh, guest to now is the cast of Mobius?

888
00:44:38,280 --> 00:44:40,560
Speaker 1: I don't know who this is? And then out comes

889
00:44:40,600 --> 00:44:46,799
Speaker 1: out Kamala Harris Bow sur surprise.

890
00:44:47,120 --> 00:44:51,759
Speaker 4: Yeah. Or there's like a fucking football picture of a football,

891
00:44:51,880 --> 00:44:59,040
Speaker 4: like a soccer ball. Okay, then fucking uh text is

892
00:44:59,280 --> 00:45:04,680
Speaker 4: believe for the word believe, and then a picture of

893
00:45:05,160 --> 00:45:08,840
Speaker 4: Ireland right or England or whatever, and he goes who's

894
00:45:08,840 --> 00:45:11,720
Speaker 4: the guest? He goes, I know, Tad Laslow, Tad Lazo

895
00:45:12,400 --> 00:45:17,560
Speaker 4: what and then out comes Jason, uh doctor yeah sakis.

896
00:45:17,800 --> 00:45:20,319
Speaker 4: He comes out what there is?

897
00:45:20,840 --> 00:45:21,839
Speaker 1: So he did guess it?

898
00:45:22,320 --> 00:45:22,960
Speaker 4: Yeah?

899
00:45:23,040 --> 00:45:23,799
Speaker 3: He guesses it?

900
00:45:24,000 --> 00:45:28,480
Speaker 4: Yeah, Yeah, that's it's a get.

901
00:45:28,520 --> 00:45:31,240
Speaker 1: We should have James guess it right, He's I.

902
00:45:31,040 --> 00:45:34,920
Speaker 2: Think the segment works if James is really smart.

903
00:45:35,280 --> 00:45:37,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, he gets him right. You have to get

904
00:45:37,640 --> 00:45:39,799
Speaker 4: let him get it right. Every once in a while.

905
00:45:40,440 --> 00:45:43,400
Speaker 2: There could be one really weird one that it's like,

906
00:45:43,440 --> 00:45:44,840
Speaker 2: who could ever get that?

907
00:45:45,239 --> 00:45:45,480
Speaker 1: You know?

908
00:45:46,200 --> 00:45:50,040
Speaker 4: What about how about this one? You get one that says, uh,

909
00:45:50,520 --> 00:45:56,240
Speaker 4: picture is of Satriali's meat market? Okay, sat All's meat market.

910
00:45:56,880 --> 00:46:00,640
Speaker 4: The text is, hey, boss, what time do we start

911
00:46:00,719 --> 00:46:03,920
Speaker 4: tomorrow night? What time is our set starting tomorrow night?

912
00:46:04,600 --> 00:46:07,359
Speaker 4: And what was the other one that's it?

913
00:46:07,920 --> 00:46:10,000
Speaker 1: Uh?

914
00:46:09,400 --> 00:46:09,520
Speaker 6: Uh?

915
00:46:10,320 --> 00:46:10,840
Speaker 1: A song?

916
00:46:11,280 --> 00:46:12,920
Speaker 4: A song was born in the USA?

917
00:46:13,120 --> 00:46:14,600
Speaker 1: Born born in the USA?

918
00:46:14,840 --> 00:46:19,080
Speaker 4: Okay, the guess is Little Stevie.

919
00:46:19,120 --> 00:46:22,440
Speaker 1: Wow, what if all what if all the Saints of

920
00:46:22,520 --> 00:46:27,080
Speaker 1: Newark are there? What if every single Saint of Newark

921
00:46:27,160 --> 00:46:27,560
Speaker 1: walked in?

922
00:46:27,880 --> 00:46:29,479
Speaker 2: Imagine they got them all?

923
00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:33,279
Speaker 6: Yeah?

924
00:46:33,840 --> 00:46:36,719
Speaker 2: I think I think Little Stevie up again.

925
00:46:39,880 --> 00:46:44,240
Speaker 1: Unrequited infatuations. Wow. I can hear him saying that title.

926
00:46:44,480 --> 00:46:46,319
Speaker 4: It's pretty cool. I didn't read it yet, but and

927
00:46:46,360 --> 00:46:49,080
Speaker 4: I will read it. But his pull quotes in the back.

928
00:46:50,000 --> 00:46:52,319
Speaker 4: I mean, if you're Little Stevie, this is pretty rad.

929
00:46:52,360 --> 00:46:57,560
Speaker 4: He's got Bob Dylan and Bruce Springsteen. Who else do

930
00:46:57,600 --> 00:46:57,919
Speaker 4: you need?

931
00:46:58,560 --> 00:47:02,680
Speaker 1: That rocks? It's huge? Sure, that book is huge.

932
00:47:03,160 --> 00:47:06,040
Speaker 4: His picks oh wow, wow.

933
00:47:06,600 --> 00:47:09,480
Speaker 5: Wait, have you guys heard of shock therapy?

934
00:47:09,600 --> 00:47:13,800
Speaker 1: Quiz No, Kevin we we He just said he doesn't

935
00:47:13,800 --> 00:47:14,120
Speaker 1: have time.

936
00:47:14,160 --> 00:47:15,880
Speaker 3: He has to don't really have time to do like

937
00:47:16,000 --> 00:47:17,040
Speaker 3: every single second.

938
00:47:17,080 --> 00:47:20,560
Speaker 1: There they are the fellas.

939
00:47:20,400 --> 00:47:25,160
Speaker 4: Me and Jimmy miss him every day, That's what it says. Nice.

940
00:47:25,239 --> 00:47:27,960
Speaker 2: Imagine if little Stevie got into one of those freestyle

941
00:47:28,040 --> 00:47:33,799
Speaker 2: rap battles with James and they're both like clowning on

942
00:47:33,880 --> 00:47:37,880
Speaker 2: each other, like really getting good digs in, but it rhymes,

943
00:47:38,040 --> 00:47:41,840
Speaker 2: and also they're like taking it with like good sportsmanship.

944
00:47:43,320 --> 00:47:45,279
Speaker 4: Yeah, I could see that. I know James. I know

945
00:47:45,360 --> 00:47:48,560
Speaker 4: Stevie is a big fan of what what James Cordon's

946
00:47:48,600 --> 00:47:50,600
Speaker 4: all about. I know He's talked about that on his

947
00:47:50,680 --> 00:47:54,400
Speaker 4: underground garage radio satellite radio. He's always going, do you

948
00:47:54,480 --> 00:47:58,520
Speaker 4: all see Jim's James Cordon last night? Fucking funny shit?

949
00:47:59,080 --> 00:48:02,120
Speaker 4: M hm, that's the fucking funny ship some of these.

950
00:48:02,040 --> 00:48:04,080
Speaker 2: Cell phone profiles. I can't I don't know how he

951
00:48:04,120 --> 00:48:05,719
Speaker 2: figures this ship out.

952
00:48:06,080 --> 00:48:08,320
Speaker 1: I'm still doing the kind of comedy Jim is changing

953
00:48:08,320 --> 00:48:11,200
Speaker 1: the game in terms of comedy here. You don't actually

954
00:48:11,200 --> 00:48:12,960
Speaker 1: have to be mean to be funny.

955
00:48:13,360 --> 00:48:17,680
Speaker 6: It reminds me of early Letterman. Remember when early Letterman

956
00:48:17,800 --> 00:48:21,279
Speaker 6: felt like you were seeing something special, like like some

957
00:48:21,560 --> 00:48:26,040
Speaker 6: like nobody the network ain't watching. Somebody's getting He's getting

958
00:48:26,040 --> 00:48:29,120
Speaker 6: away with murder. That's what's going on on that late

959
00:48:29,200 --> 00:48:30,359
Speaker 6: show with Jim Cord.

960
00:48:31,120 --> 00:48:34,840
Speaker 2: It's so out there the stuff he does.

961
00:48:35,400 --> 00:48:38,400
Speaker 4: It's like a mix Early Letterman and Dick Cavitt.

962
00:48:38,480 --> 00:48:38,680
Speaker 6: You know.

963
00:48:39,040 --> 00:48:41,120
Speaker 2: It's what I wanted Lillehammer to be.

964
00:48:42,760 --> 00:48:44,839
Speaker 1: And the guests really seem like they're having fun that

965
00:48:44,840 --> 00:48:47,080
Speaker 1: they're not there.

966
00:48:45,640 --> 00:48:51,360
Speaker 2: Ye camned story every time. Yeah, they got to actually do.

967
00:48:51,600 --> 00:48:53,000
Speaker 2: Here's James sing a song.

968
00:48:53,280 --> 00:48:55,400
Speaker 6: I think they might be having a couple of drinks

969
00:48:55,440 --> 00:48:57,000
Speaker 6: on thet if you know what I mean. You know

970
00:48:57,680 --> 00:48:59,520
Speaker 6: I think that I think they lub him up a

971
00:48:59,520 --> 00:49:03,160
Speaker 6: little bit. I gotta tell you, I can't get it

972
00:49:03,239 --> 00:49:05,960
Speaker 6: up at that. I watch you with the on the DVR.

973
00:49:06,080 --> 00:49:07,120
Speaker 6: I watch it in the morning.

974
00:49:09,360 --> 00:49:17,960
Speaker 1: DVRs. James Cordon, I'll believe. Tell me quickly what shock

975
00:49:18,000 --> 00:49:18,960
Speaker 1: therapy quiz is.

976
00:49:19,160 --> 00:49:21,840
Speaker 5: Old friends face off in a quiz to see who

977
00:49:22,000 --> 00:49:25,759
Speaker 5: knows the other better. Wrong answers are penalized with a

978
00:49:25,800 --> 00:49:28,360
Speaker 5: pretty strong electric shock impulse.

979
00:49:28,920 --> 00:49:35,880
Speaker 4: Same Abu gray baby, Right, Well.

980
00:49:35,800 --> 00:49:37,719
Speaker 3: Let's just extend that.

981
00:49:37,760 --> 00:49:40,160
Speaker 2: We go, okay, we're doing this, like, let's also do

982
00:49:40,320 --> 00:49:44,959
Speaker 2: some sexual humiliation, you know, like it's it's like, okay,

983
00:49:45,040 --> 00:49:49,000
Speaker 2: you get shocked the first round, too wrong? You know,

984
00:49:49,160 --> 00:49:53,799
Speaker 2: now you're nude, I'm smoking a cigarette thumbs up right

985
00:49:53,840 --> 00:49:57,479
Speaker 2: next to your naked body and just kind of get

986
00:49:57,520 --> 00:49:58,120
Speaker 2: that going.

987
00:49:58,280 --> 00:50:02,839
Speaker 4: Simulate a crucifix with electrical wire taping your arms up

988
00:50:02,880 --> 00:50:06,080
Speaker 4: on some two by fours. Absolutely, what is this? Like?

989
00:50:07,040 --> 00:50:07,239
Speaker 1: Is this?

990
00:50:07,680 --> 00:50:07,799
Speaker 2: Uh?

991
00:50:07,960 --> 00:50:11,240
Speaker 4: These are celebrities though, these are like who are these friends?

992
00:50:11,280 --> 00:50:17,359
Speaker 4: Like Ted? I mean Chris Evans and who else Chris Evans?

993
00:50:17,440 --> 00:50:19,959
Speaker 1: Chris Evans the whole Knives Out team is there?

994
00:50:20,200 --> 00:50:20,399
Speaker 4: Chris?

995
00:50:20,480 --> 00:50:21,719
Speaker 3: And it's gotta be.

996
00:50:22,480 --> 00:50:29,439
Speaker 4: Krasinsky, John John Krasinsky Boston Boys, right, yes, going toe

997
00:50:29,480 --> 00:50:29,839
Speaker 4: to toe.

998
00:50:30,480 --> 00:50:32,840
Speaker 1: But he's there as Jack Ryan and that's something that

999
00:50:32,840 --> 00:50:34,400
Speaker 1: he actually like does in the show.

1000
00:50:34,920 --> 00:50:38,240
Speaker 4: What about this? How about a dream scenario Mindy Kaling

1001
00:50:38,440 --> 00:50:44,560
Speaker 4: and bj Novak? Wow, hey yo, now talk about intimacy.

1002
00:50:46,200 --> 00:50:48,480
Speaker 4: I would love to see more of them together on TV.

1003
00:50:48,600 --> 00:50:49,839
Speaker 4: That would be fantastic.

1004
00:50:50,680 --> 00:50:53,400
Speaker 3: No, are the only problem nobody's getting shocked.

1005
00:50:53,800 --> 00:50:58,600
Speaker 2: That's true too well, damn it, because they're that close.

1006
00:51:01,120 --> 00:51:02,040
Speaker 2: Cool idea.

1007
00:51:02,960 --> 00:51:06,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, let's swing in a miss I got a note.

1008
00:51:07,000 --> 00:51:09,200
Speaker 4: Let's just get them on the couch seeing them know

1009
00:51:09,400 --> 00:51:11,360
Speaker 4: each other, let them, let them go in the couch

1010
00:51:11,400 --> 00:51:13,800
Speaker 4: and let you know what. People loved watching Ken Jennings

1011
00:51:13,840 --> 00:51:16,799
Speaker 4: win Jeopardy over and over again. Maybe they'll just they

1012
00:51:16,920 --> 00:51:19,759
Speaker 4: come back and they go, oh my god, it's been

1013
00:51:19,880 --> 00:51:24,000
Speaker 4: fifty weeks and not one shock. These two are simple.

1014
00:51:24,120 --> 00:51:24,840
Speaker 6: Are they cheating?

1015
00:51:24,960 --> 00:51:28,040
Speaker 3: Someone would say, yeah, their hand signals.

1016
00:51:29,480 --> 00:51:32,320
Speaker 1: Tim. Do you want to talk about the Office Hours?

1017
00:51:32,719 --> 00:51:35,360
Speaker 1: Patriots stuff coming up on cinema?

1018
00:51:35,400 --> 00:51:36,480
Speaker 3: New season on Cinema?

1019
00:51:36,680 --> 00:51:36,919
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1020
00:51:36,960 --> 00:51:39,520
Speaker 4: All that shit, man, It's just all happening at the

1021
00:51:39,520 --> 00:51:42,080
Speaker 4: same time, all the time. What do you want me

1022
00:51:42,160 --> 00:51:45,479
Speaker 4: to say? Office Hours is on. We do it every week.

1023
00:51:45,560 --> 00:51:49,040
Speaker 4: It's a lot of fun. We have all sorts of

1024
00:51:49,040 --> 00:51:52,960
Speaker 4: great guests come in. It's a morning show, folks. That's

1025
00:51:53,000 --> 00:51:55,480
Speaker 4: what it really boils down to. It's a call in show.

1026
00:51:55,680 --> 00:51:59,680
Speaker 4: We dug loosen hop, Vick Berger and me just clown around.

1027
00:51:59,719 --> 00:52:01,719
Speaker 4: I got real mad at those guys the other day, though.

1028
00:52:01,760 --> 00:52:04,600
Speaker 4: I got real I yelled, Allie, what happened Tim?

1029
00:52:05,080 --> 00:52:07,520
Speaker 1: When I watch it? When is he gonna punish them?

1030
00:52:07,680 --> 00:52:09,960
Speaker 3: I really on these clowns.

1031
00:52:09,960 --> 00:52:12,400
Speaker 4: You know. They play the sound effects, the drops, we

1032
00:52:12,520 --> 00:52:15,879
Speaker 4: call them drops, you know, and it's fun and it's

1033
00:52:15,680 --> 00:52:19,040
Speaker 4: it definitely is A is A A good part of

1034
00:52:19,080 --> 00:52:21,879
Speaker 4: the show, important part of the show. But sometimes they

1035
00:52:21,880 --> 00:52:24,279
Speaker 4: get lost in their right behind me is where they say,

1036
00:52:24,440 --> 00:52:28,000
Speaker 4: sometimes they get lost in their little sound collage worlds

1037
00:52:28,400 --> 00:52:31,960
Speaker 4: and they're just blasting away, like especially on Halloween, they're

1038
00:52:32,000 --> 00:52:36,560
Speaker 4: just blasting away like screaming ghules and you know, murder

1039
00:52:36,680 --> 00:52:37,240
Speaker 4: sound effects.

1040
00:52:37,280 --> 00:52:38,200
Speaker 1: It's really disruptive.

1041
00:52:38,680 --> 00:52:43,840
Speaker 4: I'm invend Barnow. I'm trying to interview Devendra whatever his

1042
00:52:43,920 --> 00:52:47,959
Speaker 4: last name is Barton, and I say, guys, I'm gonna

1043
00:52:48,040 --> 00:52:49,919
Speaker 4: What I need is a nuclear button that I could

1044
00:52:49,920 --> 00:52:50,680
Speaker 4: slam down and.

1045
00:52:50,680 --> 00:52:53,240
Speaker 3: Just cuts the drops kill button.

1046
00:52:53,719 --> 00:52:55,200
Speaker 4: But then on the other side of the coin you

1047
00:52:55,280 --> 00:52:58,360
Speaker 4: got the on Cinema season twelve is now this is

1048
00:52:58,400 --> 00:53:01,319
Speaker 4: all about the paywall, folks. People hate it. They say, well,

1049
00:53:01,360 --> 00:53:03,480
Speaker 4: I want it, but I've gotten this thing for free

1050
00:53:03,960 --> 00:53:06,640
Speaker 4: for so long on YouTube. Well it was never free.

1051
00:53:06,640 --> 00:53:08,799
Speaker 4: There was always somebody paying for it. Now it's you.

1052
00:53:09,239 --> 00:53:11,440
Speaker 1: What you were doing then was unethical.

1053
00:53:11,160 --> 00:53:14,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly, And so now it's behind it's a high

1054
00:53:14,040 --> 00:53:19,120
Speaker 4: network h EI network, dot TV and it's another five

1055
00:53:19,160 --> 00:53:23,120
Speaker 4: dollars a month situation, very affordable. The whole season's there

1056
00:53:23,280 --> 00:53:26,719
Speaker 4: where We've got much more in store. We are just

1057
00:53:26,880 --> 00:53:29,920
Speaker 4: like Westinghouse might have been doing when he started going

1058
00:53:29,960 --> 00:53:33,560
Speaker 4: into the whole CBS situation way back in the twenties.

1059
00:53:34,440 --> 00:53:39,399
Speaker 4: You know, we're building an empire. And you know, I'll

1060
00:53:39,400 --> 00:53:41,359
Speaker 4: look at your call, at your balance sheet and see

1061
00:53:41,360 --> 00:53:46,080
Speaker 4: if I want to maybe start start acquiring shows. We'll see,

1062
00:53:46,120 --> 00:53:47,279
Speaker 4: we don't know that.

1063
00:53:47,440 --> 00:53:49,520
Speaker 1: I mean that would be a me and like it's

1064
00:53:49,560 --> 00:53:52,080
Speaker 1: all part of the Patreon family, so we basically are

1065
00:53:52,080 --> 00:53:54,960
Speaker 1: already all on the same team. And they, of course

1066
00:53:55,000 --> 00:53:57,640
Speaker 1: they want to point out that office hours, it is

1067
00:53:57,640 --> 00:54:01,160
Speaker 1: a morning show, but you can drink, you can get

1068
00:54:01,200 --> 00:54:05,000
Speaker 1: fucked up in the new meta universe, like people are

1069
00:54:05,000 --> 00:54:07,120
Speaker 1: actually in there with you. They can now hit I

1070
00:54:07,120 --> 00:54:08,640
Speaker 1: don't know if you saw this in the announcement today.

1071
00:54:08,680 --> 00:54:11,560
Speaker 1: They the audience can do drops during the show.

1072
00:54:11,840 --> 00:54:13,000
Speaker 4: Oh, that sounds like fun.

1073
00:54:13,160 --> 00:54:16,360
Speaker 1: So they have access to the board. Anyone can like

1074
00:54:16,440 --> 00:54:18,960
Speaker 1: hit the button at any time. Yeah, and they have

1075
00:54:19,440 --> 00:54:22,000
Speaker 1: vodka unlimited vodka gimlets.

1076
00:54:22,320 --> 00:54:25,640
Speaker 4: Mm hmm, oh well, that sounds like a great opportunity

1077
00:54:25,680 --> 00:54:31,600
Speaker 4: for everybody involved. Well, I appreciate you guys being friends

1078
00:54:31,640 --> 00:54:34,719
Speaker 4: and uh not friends. I don't really know you outside

1079
00:54:34,760 --> 00:54:36,600
Speaker 4: of this experience. I know you were a little bit.

1080
00:54:36,640 --> 00:54:39,040
Speaker 2: Felt really good to hear maybe we could get there,

1081
00:54:40,000 --> 00:54:46,680
Speaker 2: and then I hit here. I don't think so, Tim.

1082
00:54:44,760 --> 00:54:46,760
Speaker 4: Oh damn yeah, Okay.

1083
00:54:49,280 --> 00:54:52,279
Speaker 5: This week on the Patreon Carl and Asan discuss Kanye's

1084
00:54:52,360 --> 00:54:55,960
Speaker 5: Drink Champs interview, the Boys celebrate their two hundredth pro version,

1085
00:54:56,200 --> 00:54:59,759
Speaker 5: and The Flagrant Ones are mostly talking all things basketball.

1086
00:55:00,160 --> 00:55:03,440
Speaker 5: Check out these bonus podcasts and videos of the full episodes,

1087
00:55:03,440 --> 00:55:06,840
Speaker 5: including today's with Tim at patreon dot com, Slash the

1088
00:55:06,920 --> 00:55:09,759
Speaker 5: Flavorant Ones, Hollywood, Hamburg,