1
00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:02,800
Speaker 1: Hey, this is Jonas is Sam your og Okay Storytime

2
00:00:02,840 --> 00:00:05,600
Speaker 1: podcast hosts. We have some great stories coming up, but

3
00:00:05,640 --> 00:00:07,120
Speaker 1: before that, we have a quick two minute break from

4
00:00:07,120 --> 00:00:08,520
Speaker 1: the sponsors that keep the show alive.

5
00:00:09,360 --> 00:00:13,280
Speaker 2: I accidentally saw evidence that my husband could be cheating,

6
00:00:13,600 --> 00:00:17,560
Speaker 2: well at least could be. I thirty female, don't know

7
00:00:17,640 --> 00:00:20,680
Speaker 2: where exactly to start. My husband, thirty two male, is

8
00:00:20,720 --> 00:00:23,720
Speaker 2: working late tonight, or that is what he says, so

9
00:00:23,800 --> 00:00:25,840
Speaker 2: I thought I'd take some time to write in and

10
00:00:25,920 --> 00:00:28,840
Speaker 2: ask for advice. We have been together since college, married

11
00:00:28,840 --> 00:00:31,560
Speaker 2: for the last eight years right after college grad for me.

12
00:00:32,159 --> 00:00:34,280
Speaker 3: By the way this comes from, I think it might

13
00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:34,879
Speaker 3: be over.

14
00:00:34,920 --> 00:00:36,479
Speaker 2: And if you want to submit your own stories, go

15
00:00:36,479 --> 00:00:39,480
Speaker 2: to the r slash okay storytime Supreddit And I'm Angie.

16
00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:41,040
Speaker 1: I'm Dakota, I'm Riley.

17
00:00:40,840 --> 00:00:43,360
Speaker 2: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we

18
00:00:43,400 --> 00:00:46,080
Speaker 2: don't have all the answers, so we're just gonna try

19
00:00:46,120 --> 00:00:48,080
Speaker 2: to guess what we would do in this situation. But

20
00:00:48,159 --> 00:00:50,400
Speaker 2: let us know what you would do in the commons

21
00:00:50,440 --> 00:00:54,480
Speaker 2: down below. So, uh, we were perfect for each other.

22
00:00:54,600 --> 00:00:57,320
Speaker 2: Many friendships have come and gone, but we've always found

23
00:00:57,400 --> 00:01:01,360
Speaker 2: contentment in each other. Both adventurous and did some traveling together.

24
00:01:01,400 --> 00:01:04,120
Speaker 2: When we were first married, we argued, but not a lot.

25
00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:06,440
Speaker 2: We had kids, The first one that was a planned

26
00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:10,840
Speaker 2: child was six years ago, second surprise child, and the

27
00:01:10,920 --> 00:01:14,559
Speaker 2: last is now three. Since having kids, it's been tough

28
00:01:14,600 --> 00:01:17,360
Speaker 2: to get time together. Both of our parents live a

29
00:01:17,400 --> 00:01:20,840
Speaker 2: few hours drive away. There aren't many babysitters that we've

30
00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:25,120
Speaker 2: found that can handle our rambunctious boys. Husband works a demanding,

31
00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:28,360
Speaker 2: stressful job and has had to cancel vacation plans more

32
00:01:28,400 --> 00:01:30,840
Speaker 2: than once over the last six years because of a

33
00:01:30,920 --> 00:01:33,680
Speaker 2: terrible boss. We were seeing each other for what felt

34
00:01:33,680 --> 00:01:37,200
Speaker 2: like minutes every day, and our children, while wonderful, demanded

35
00:01:37,240 --> 00:01:39,880
Speaker 2: a lot of our time and energy. His boss changed

36
00:01:39,920 --> 00:01:43,240
Speaker 2: about six months ago. Immediately his hours became more reasonable

37
00:01:43,319 --> 00:01:46,600
Speaker 2: and his stress levels went down. Still long hours in

38
00:01:46,680 --> 00:01:50,640
Speaker 2: travel some days, but better. We had evenings together again, but.

39
00:01:50,680 --> 00:01:51,720
Speaker 3: Something was different.

40
00:01:52,000 --> 00:01:54,680
Speaker 2: It felt like we were strangers, just roommates who had

41
00:01:54,760 --> 00:01:57,880
Speaker 2: kids together. We were just so exhausted from the last

42
00:01:57,920 --> 00:02:00,520
Speaker 2: few years that we must have spent a couple months

43
00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:03,280
Speaker 2: using any spare time we had once the kids were

44
00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:07,200
Speaker 2: in bed, crashing, watching Netflix, et cetera, just boring stuff

45
00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:09,560
Speaker 2: and all along, I felt very disconnected from the man

46
00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:11,919
Speaker 2: who was supposed to be my partner, so we.

47
00:02:11,960 --> 00:02:14,480
Speaker 3: Talked about it. I told him that I missed him.

48
00:02:14,639 --> 00:02:18,040
Speaker 2: We had a few conversations about feeling disconnected. We hired

49
00:02:18,040 --> 00:02:20,760
Speaker 2: a sitter, went on some dates, and things started to

50
00:02:20,760 --> 00:02:24,359
Speaker 2: feel better. He's been more loving and attentive. He bought

51
00:02:24,440 --> 00:02:28,080
Speaker 2: me flowers again. I was feeling so hopeful, like I

52
00:02:28,160 --> 00:02:30,800
Speaker 2: was getting my partner back. About a month ago, I

53
00:02:30,880 --> 00:02:33,560
Speaker 2: noticed something that I think I wasn't supposed to.

54
00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:36,400
Speaker 3: He has been talking about this work trip coming up

55
00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:37,320
Speaker 3: for a week in August.

56
00:02:37,400 --> 00:02:39,120
Speaker 2: It's been a bit of a sore spot for me,

57
00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:41,880
Speaker 2: since in my mind, summer is for family vacations, not

58
00:02:41,960 --> 00:02:46,480
Speaker 2: work trips. But I've been being understanding. However, when he

59
00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:49,440
Speaker 2: was in the shower, his phone beeped and I saw

60
00:02:49,440 --> 00:02:53,600
Speaker 2: an email from someone named Alison entitled our trip.

61
00:02:53,880 --> 00:02:55,120
Speaker 1: With an exclamation point.

62
00:02:55,160 --> 00:02:59,440
Speaker 2: With an exclamation point, our trip doesn't necessarily sound like

63
00:02:59,440 --> 00:03:00,239
Speaker 2: a work trip.

64
00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:01,480
Speaker 1: Doesn't sound very worky to me.

65
00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:04,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, I felt a little weird looking at it, But

66
00:03:04,720 --> 00:03:07,000
Speaker 2: when I asked him about it, he checked his phone

67
00:03:07,040 --> 00:03:08,680
Speaker 2: and told me that it was a spam email.

68
00:03:09,240 --> 00:03:12,000
Speaker 3: What doesn't sound that's not a kind of spam emails,

69
00:03:12,040 --> 00:03:12,320
Speaker 3: I get.

70
00:03:12,440 --> 00:03:16,680
Speaker 1: That's the worst cover I've ever heard. Yeah, that's clearly

71
00:03:16,720 --> 00:03:17,920
Speaker 1: not a spam email.

72
00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:20,120
Speaker 3: Right, that's crazy.

73
00:03:20,919 --> 00:03:22,799
Speaker 2: I didn't think of it after that, but since then

74
00:03:22,880 --> 00:03:25,600
Speaker 2: I haven't seen his phone left out again. I found

75
00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:27,840
Speaker 2: something else about a week ago. It was a receipt

76
00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:30,840
Speaker 2: for a jewelry store, and it was a sizeable sum.

77
00:03:31,360 --> 00:03:33,640
Speaker 2: Money has never really been terribly tight for us, but

78
00:03:33,800 --> 00:03:36,240
Speaker 2: even I was surprised by how much it was for

79
00:03:36,480 --> 00:03:39,400
Speaker 2: I felt a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach,

80
00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:41,960
Speaker 2: and I admit I looked for his personal laptop to

81
00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:44,240
Speaker 2: see if I could snoop through his emails, but he

82
00:03:44,280 --> 00:03:47,240
Speaker 2: had taken his personal laptop to work, something that he

83
00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:50,320
Speaker 2: had never done before. I was getting nervous, but somehow

84
00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:52,720
Speaker 2: didn't want to bring it up with him. Maybe I

85
00:03:52,840 --> 00:03:54,920
Speaker 2: was trying not to believe it. But this morning I

86
00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:57,520
Speaker 2: found his credit card bill in his sock drawer.

87
00:03:58,120 --> 00:03:59,600
Speaker 3: Why was he hiding it, you ask?

88
00:04:00,200 --> 00:04:03,560
Speaker 2: There were transactions going back over the last month, all

89
00:04:03,600 --> 00:04:06,840
Speaker 2: for stores that men typically don't shop at. I added

90
00:04:06,840 --> 00:04:09,080
Speaker 2: them up and he has spent a few hundred dollars

91
00:04:09,120 --> 00:04:12,280
Speaker 2: on what looks like women's clothing and lingerie. I haven't

92
00:04:12,320 --> 00:04:13,920
Speaker 2: seen anything from these stores in our.

93
00:04:13,840 --> 00:04:15,920
Speaker 3: House, so who are they? Four?

94
00:04:16,720 --> 00:04:19,640
Speaker 2: He is working better hours, but still away some evenings.

95
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:21,960
Speaker 2: He could be spending at least an evening a week

96
00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:24,320
Speaker 2: with someone else. I don't know what to think, but

97
00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:27,279
Speaker 2: I fear the worst. Is there someone else? Was I

98
00:04:27,320 --> 00:04:30,039
Speaker 2: too unavailable when our kids were younger? Is he going

99
00:04:30,080 --> 00:04:32,800
Speaker 2: on a trip with them? Is it this Allison person?

100
00:04:33,279 --> 00:04:35,320
Speaker 2: What am I going to do if he leaves me?

101
00:04:35,839 --> 00:04:38,640
Speaker 2: He's buying her presents? For God's sake? Doesn't that usually

102
00:04:38,720 --> 00:04:40,960
Speaker 2: mean a man is moving on or falling in love

103
00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:43,960
Speaker 2: somewhere else. I don't know what to do. I don't

104
00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:46,479
Speaker 2: know any of his passwords, so I can't snoop. I

105
00:04:46,480 --> 00:04:48,800
Speaker 2: could call his office to make sure that he's actually

106
00:04:48,880 --> 00:04:50,720
Speaker 2: there when he says he is, But if I talk

107
00:04:50,800 --> 00:04:53,200
Speaker 2: to anyone, I think I'm just going to start bawling again.

108
00:04:53,680 --> 00:04:56,040
Speaker 2: He should be home in a few hours. What am

109
00:04:56,080 --> 00:04:58,120
Speaker 2: I going to do? I don't want to raise my

110
00:04:58,200 --> 00:05:00,000
Speaker 2: kids alone. I don't want to be alone.

111
00:05:00,440 --> 00:05:01,760
Speaker 3: Any advice please?

112
00:05:01,960 --> 00:05:04,680
Speaker 2: And there are some comments and way more to this story,

113
00:05:04,720 --> 00:05:06,159
Speaker 2: But what would your advice be?

114
00:05:06,920 --> 00:05:10,560
Speaker 1: It's a pretty tough spot. Being Yeah, what would you

115
00:05:10,600 --> 00:05:10,960
Speaker 1: do if.

116
00:05:10,839 --> 00:05:13,920
Speaker 4: You got an email like that? What if I got

117
00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:15,720
Speaker 4: our titled our trip?

118
00:05:15,839 --> 00:05:17,320
Speaker 1: If I got some spam email.

119
00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:21,240
Speaker 2: I think we should take the credit card bill, grab it,

120
00:05:21,440 --> 00:05:22,880
Speaker 2: take it out of there. Bro.

121
00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:24,760
Speaker 1: I don't know what to tell you, because it's like

122
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:26,600
Speaker 1: you don't want to raise your kids alone and all

123
00:05:26,600 --> 00:05:28,080
Speaker 1: this stuff, and it's like, you know, maybe you can

124
00:05:28,080 --> 00:05:29,919
Speaker 1: find a different partner. But it sounds like he's cheating

125
00:05:29,960 --> 00:05:33,600
Speaker 1: on you with this woman going on a trip with her.

126
00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:37,360
Speaker 1: He's lying to you, he's breaking all the trust, he's

127
00:05:37,600 --> 00:05:41,600
Speaker 1: breaching his contract, even though you have evidence of he

128
00:05:41,640 --> 00:05:44,480
Speaker 1: could be. I think it's very clear, yeah he is.

129
00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:50,479
Speaker 1: There's not really any work like reasonable explanation for him

130
00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:56,320
Speaker 1: buying an outlandishly expensive piece of jewelry for not you,

131
00:05:57,880 --> 00:06:01,239
Speaker 1: you know where that's going someone else.

132
00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:03,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think first thing that you should do if

133
00:06:03,240 --> 00:06:05,560
Speaker 2: you can, if you have some sort of like joint

134
00:06:05,560 --> 00:06:09,400
Speaker 2: bank account, get rid of that. You just just take

135
00:06:09,720 --> 00:06:11,320
Speaker 2: get your money out of there so we can't like

136
00:06:11,360 --> 00:06:12,480
Speaker 2: steal from you or something.

137
00:06:12,920 --> 00:06:16,599
Speaker 3: But yeah, I think grab the credit card bill.

138
00:06:16,720 --> 00:06:19,680
Speaker 2: I think it's more of like how you're gonna do it,

139
00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:21,880
Speaker 2: rather than what should you do? Because you can't just

140
00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:24,000
Speaker 2: put up with it and let it happen, so you

141
00:06:24,120 --> 00:06:26,000
Speaker 2: have to tell him. Of course, you don't want to

142
00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:29,200
Speaker 2: be alone, but I mean, yeah, I don't think anyone

143
00:06:29,240 --> 00:06:32,320
Speaker 2: would want to be alone in that situation. But unfortunately

144
00:06:32,839 --> 00:06:35,800
Speaker 2: he's not someone worth staying around. But we do have

145
00:06:35,880 --> 00:06:40,279
Speaker 2: some commenters. Drink mail tears is. Show him the receipt

146
00:06:40,360 --> 00:06:43,279
Speaker 2: you found, ask him to explain why he's been buying

147
00:06:43,279 --> 00:06:46,360
Speaker 2: women's clothing and jewelry. If the reason is totally innocent,

148
00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:49,680
Speaker 2: like he's been quietly squirrelling away gifts for you, he

149
00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:52,520
Speaker 2: should be able to explain it easily. If he gets defensive,

150
00:06:52,640 --> 00:06:55,560
Speaker 2: accuses you of distrusting him, or otherwise tries to make

151
00:06:55,600 --> 00:06:58,440
Speaker 2: an argument about your behavior instead of answering the question,

152
00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:01,280
Speaker 2: you have your answer. If he is in fact cheating,

153
00:07:01,440 --> 00:07:02,760
Speaker 2: lawyer up immediately.

154
00:07:03,240 --> 00:07:03,880
Speaker 3: Even if you.

155
00:07:03,920 --> 00:07:06,280
Speaker 2: Have to shoulder the burden of parenting more or less

156
00:07:06,279 --> 00:07:08,240
Speaker 2: on your own from here on out, you can do

157
00:07:08,320 --> 00:07:10,520
Speaker 2: everything in your power to ensure that he has to

158
00:07:10,560 --> 00:07:12,720
Speaker 2: contribute fairly to your kids living expenses.

159
00:07:13,160 --> 00:07:14,240
Speaker 3: OPI responds.

160
00:07:14,280 --> 00:07:16,920
Speaker 2: Even the idea of raising the kids without him makes

161
00:07:16,960 --> 00:07:19,040
Speaker 2: me want to puke. It's not the money, it's the

162
00:07:19,120 --> 00:07:21,360
Speaker 2: lack of a partner. I'll show him the receipt when

163
00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:23,360
Speaker 2: he gets home. I don't know if I'll be coherent

164
00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:25,960
Speaker 2: or not. But if he was getting gifts from me,

165
00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:28,440
Speaker 2: I would think I would have seen something hidden around here.

166
00:07:28,480 --> 00:07:32,120
Speaker 2: But I've torn the house apart today looking there's nothing.

167
00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:34,000
Speaker 3: He's never bought me clothes before.

168
00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:36,600
Speaker 2: I can't remember the last time he bought me lingerie,

169
00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:38,440
Speaker 2: maybe before we had kids.

170
00:07:38,680 --> 00:07:39,920
Speaker 3: And there is an update.

171
00:07:40,760 --> 00:07:43,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, I feel like you could ask, like, uh, how

172
00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:46,120
Speaker 2: good the lingerie looks on Alison?

173
00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:49,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, I guess something.

174
00:07:49,080 --> 00:07:52,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, what does what does that look like? Uh?

175
00:07:52,640 --> 00:07:53,320
Speaker 4: I don't want to know.

176
00:07:53,720 --> 00:07:55,800
Speaker 3: I mean, well, it would be more of it, just

177
00:07:55,840 --> 00:08:04,720
Speaker 3: like ah told you that you're crazy. Yeah, maybe take

178
00:08:04,720 --> 00:08:06,560
Speaker 3: a picture of the girl carn Bill too, just.

179
00:08:06,520 --> 00:08:08,800
Speaker 2: In case, Like, I don't know if you could use

180
00:08:08,840 --> 00:08:12,640
Speaker 2: that to in a in a divorce or something like that,

181
00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:15,760
Speaker 2: and you know, yeah, give it to a lawyer.

182
00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:18,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think, Uh, that sucks.

183
00:08:18,960 --> 00:08:19,760
Speaker 3: That sucks, dude.

184
00:08:20,240 --> 00:08:23,320
Speaker 1: I think you gotta start making moves.

185
00:08:23,600 --> 00:08:25,360
Speaker 3: Yep, yep, yep, yep.

186
00:08:25,800 --> 00:08:29,520
Speaker 2: So update, there is an edit. The comments are making

187
00:08:29,560 --> 00:08:32,839
Speaker 2: me very scared. I'm thankful for everyone who is talking

188
00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:34,959
Speaker 2: to me, though, even when it's hard to hear. I've

189
00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:38,600
Speaker 2: calmed down a bit, no longer stopping, and I'm going

190
00:08:38,640 --> 00:08:41,160
Speaker 2: to call my older sister to talk to a real

191
00:08:41,200 --> 00:08:43,600
Speaker 2: person about this. She lives a couple hours away, but

192
00:08:43,640 --> 00:08:46,080
Speaker 2: we have always been close and she knows my husband well.

193
00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:48,640
Speaker 2: And we'll try an update again later. Thank you again

194
00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:51,960
Speaker 2: to everyone at A number two. I just had a

195
00:08:52,080 --> 00:08:55,280
Speaker 2: very strange conversation with my sister.

196
00:08:55,920 --> 00:08:56,959
Speaker 3: Oh this is weird.

197
00:08:57,720 --> 00:09:00,240
Speaker 2: I told her everything was getting really worked up and

198
00:09:00,320 --> 00:09:04,160
Speaker 2: emotional and crying again, and she interrupted me and told me, Sis,

199
00:09:04,559 --> 00:09:06,520
Speaker 2: it's going to be fine. You need to calm down

200
00:09:06,559 --> 00:09:08,920
Speaker 2: and talk to husband when he gets home. I promise

201
00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:11,520
Speaker 2: everything is okay. Hang up the phone, take a bath

202
00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:13,679
Speaker 2: or something, calm down, and wait for husband.

203
00:09:13,440 --> 00:09:15,600
Speaker 3: To get home. Then she says she loved me, and

204
00:09:15,640 --> 00:09:16,360
Speaker 3: she hung up.

205
00:09:16,720 --> 00:09:20,040
Speaker 2: That's a little weird. What the heck is going on

206
00:09:20,120 --> 00:09:22,240
Speaker 2: with my life today? I feel like she just blew

207
00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:24,360
Speaker 2: me off. She didn't seem to react to what I

208
00:09:24,400 --> 00:09:27,440
Speaker 2: was saying, but most commentaries here seem pretty sure that

209
00:09:27,679 --> 00:09:31,440
Speaker 2: something bad is going on. I feel like I'm going crazy.

210
00:09:32,040 --> 00:09:35,200
Speaker 2: There is a second update. Yeah, I have no idea

211
00:09:35,280 --> 00:09:39,920
Speaker 2: what that was about. Do your sister have a secret identity.

212
00:09:40,559 --> 00:09:42,120
Speaker 1: Your sister's acting funny.

213
00:09:42,920 --> 00:09:44,480
Speaker 3: She sometimes goes by Alison.

214
00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:49,040
Speaker 1: She's funny. Funny, dude, it'll be funny, acting funny.

215
00:09:49,280 --> 00:09:51,760
Speaker 4: If Opie forgot her sister's middle name.

216
00:09:52,040 --> 00:09:55,720
Speaker 3: And it was Alison, that'd be crazy. Maybe, dude, I

217
00:09:55,760 --> 00:09:56,199
Speaker 3: don't know.

218
00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:59,080
Speaker 2: That was just really weird. Maybe she was just like

219
00:09:59,320 --> 00:10:02,480
Speaker 2: not a good like. Maybe she just couldn't talk, but

220
00:10:02,840 --> 00:10:05,319
Speaker 2: she was in a rush or something.

221
00:10:05,280 --> 00:10:07,319
Speaker 1: But she did just trying to talk her down. Yes,

222
00:10:07,480 --> 00:10:08,160
Speaker 1: so could be.

223
00:10:08,760 --> 00:10:13,120
Speaker 3: But but we've got more of this story. Update number two.

224
00:10:13,679 --> 00:10:15,679
Speaker 2: Right after I posted my edit about my sister and

225
00:10:15,720 --> 00:10:18,120
Speaker 2: the phone call, my husband texted me. He said my

226
00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:20,760
Speaker 2: sister had called him and he was on his way home.

227
00:10:21,280 --> 00:10:25,800
Speaker 2: I'm sorry what your sister called your husband. I immediately

228
00:10:25,840 --> 00:10:28,160
Speaker 2: freaked out because I did not feel ready to talk

229
00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:30,360
Speaker 2: to him. I was super pissed at my sister for

230
00:10:30,440 --> 00:10:32,280
Speaker 2: calling him, and to be honest, I felt like the

231
00:10:32,440 --> 00:10:33,559
Speaker 2: entire world.

232
00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:36,840
Speaker 3: Was falling down around my ears. I broke down.

233
00:10:37,800 --> 00:10:39,560
Speaker 2: I didn't even know where I was, but when I

234
00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:41,920
Speaker 2: heard the front door open, I realized I was on

235
00:10:41,960 --> 00:10:45,280
Speaker 2: my knees in the kitchen, sobbing. My husband skidded around

236
00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:47,200
Speaker 2: the corner, and when I saw him, I just started

237
00:10:47,240 --> 00:10:49,720
Speaker 2: crying harder. He dropped to the ground in front of

238
00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:52,640
Speaker 2: me and started apologizing, and I just lost it. I

239
00:10:52,679 --> 00:10:55,520
Speaker 2: started shaking my head and saying no, no, no, over

240
00:10:55,679 --> 00:10:58,240
Speaker 2: and over again. I couldn't even hear what he was saying.

241
00:10:58,640 --> 00:11:00,520
Speaker 2: He tried to hug me, and I held my arms

242
00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:02,520
Speaker 2: out all stiff, like a kid does when they don't

243
00:11:02,559 --> 00:11:05,120
Speaker 2: want a hug, just holding him back. It took me

244
00:11:05,200 --> 00:11:06,960
Speaker 2: a few minutes to register what he was saying, but

245
00:11:07,040 --> 00:11:10,120
Speaker 2: he was repeating over and over, I'm sorry for scaring you.

246
00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:12,360
Speaker 2: Please listen to me. You need to hear what's going on.

247
00:11:12,440 --> 00:11:13,280
Speaker 2: I'm not cheating.

248
00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:18,000
Speaker 3: Please listen to me, just over and over. What.

249
00:11:18,320 --> 00:11:21,080
Speaker 4: Oh, No, We're about to get flamed in the chat.

250
00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:23,679
Speaker 1: No, we jumped to conclusions.

251
00:11:24,800 --> 00:11:29,559
Speaker 3: No what, I'd never done that crazy. No.

252
00:11:30,400 --> 00:11:34,880
Speaker 2: I finally stopped and just said what. I was just

253
00:11:34,920 --> 00:11:39,520
Speaker 2: so drained, confused. It was good news. I saw some

254
00:11:39,559 --> 00:11:41,880
Speaker 2: of the comments in the original post saying maybe it

255
00:11:41,960 --> 00:11:44,199
Speaker 2: was a surprise and you folks.

256
00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:45,840
Speaker 3: Get the grand prize.

257
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:50,280
Speaker 2: The story all came out after our big talks about reconnecting.

258
00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:51,840
Speaker 3: He called my sister for advice.

259
00:11:52,280 --> 00:11:55,400
Speaker 2: My sister's idea was to have him spirit me away

260
00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:57,920
Speaker 2: for a surprise weekend get away while she and my

261
00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:01,160
Speaker 2: brother in law took the kids. Died him to her friend,

262
00:12:01,280 --> 00:12:05,400
Speaker 2: a travel agent remember Allison, to get the ball rolling.

263
00:12:05,920 --> 00:12:09,560
Speaker 2: The plan evolved into my sister and parents trading off

264
00:12:09,559 --> 00:12:11,960
Speaker 2: with the kids for the week. The jewelry receipt is

265
00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:15,160
Speaker 2: for a necklace for me to wear out to dinner

266
00:12:15,200 --> 00:12:18,160
Speaker 2: on our trip. The credit card charges are for some

267
00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:20,480
Speaker 2: fancy clothes and laundry that he got me for the trip.

268
00:12:20,760 --> 00:12:22,559
Speaker 2: He took some of my clothes with him to get

269
00:12:22,559 --> 00:12:24,480
Speaker 2: the sizes right and got a lot of help from

270
00:12:24,520 --> 00:12:27,800
Speaker 2: the salespeople. He says that they're my style, but they

271
00:12:27,800 --> 00:12:30,040
Speaker 2: could be bags for all I care at this point,

272
00:12:30,280 --> 00:12:34,360
Speaker 2: So why the surprise. My sister told him that it

273
00:12:34,400 --> 00:12:36,800
Speaker 2: would be better if it was a surprise because it

274
00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:39,800
Speaker 2: would be romantic that way. She didn't count on me

275
00:12:39,920 --> 00:12:42,959
Speaker 2: finding out early and assuming the worst. I've had mild

276
00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:45,600
Speaker 2: anxiety issues in my life that have been worse since

277
00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:48,200
Speaker 2: having kids, but this was the worst it's ever been.

278
00:12:48,360 --> 00:12:51,240
Speaker 3: I've never felt so totally out of control in my life.

279
00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:53,040
Speaker 3: He didn't tell me all of this right away.

280
00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:55,480
Speaker 2: Some of it came out in that first moment in

281
00:12:55,520 --> 00:12:57,160
Speaker 2: the kitchen, but when I realized it was not the

282
00:12:57,240 --> 00:13:00,200
Speaker 2: end of my marriage, I pretty much became incoherent with relief.

283
00:13:00,559 --> 00:13:03,040
Speaker 2: This is embarrassing, but I sobbed so hard that I've

284
00:13:03,080 --> 00:13:03,960
Speaker 2: omitted a little bit.

285
00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:08,920
Speaker 3: At least it was on the linoleum. The rest he

286
00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:09,320
Speaker 3: told me.

287
00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:12,160
Speaker 2: After I calmed down, we talked until late last night.

288
00:13:12,440 --> 00:13:15,000
Speaker 2: He showed me all the emails, showed me our destination.

289
00:13:15,240 --> 00:13:18,360
Speaker 2: We got excited together. I'm not mad at him at all,

290
00:13:18,640 --> 00:13:21,520
Speaker 2: which he is relieved by. Apparently, my sister called him

291
00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:23,760
Speaker 2: with a red alert. Get home now before your wife

292
00:13:23,760 --> 00:13:25,120
Speaker 2: calls a lawyer message.

293
00:13:25,320 --> 00:13:28,400
Speaker 3: Oh my god, she's not great over the phone.

294
00:13:28,520 --> 00:13:33,800
Speaker 2: It sounds like, oh my goodness, she knows I have

295
00:13:33,880 --> 00:13:36,280
Speaker 2: some anxiety issues, so I may have to get after

296
00:13:36,360 --> 00:13:38,440
Speaker 2: her about the decision to keep this all a big

297
00:13:38,520 --> 00:13:41,560
Speaker 2: secret from me. Right now, I am too relieved to

298
00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:46,480
Speaker 2: be upset. Wow, Yeah, I mean I just I did

299
00:13:46,520 --> 00:13:48,959
Speaker 2: just read a couple more sentences, and it's pretty much

300
00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:49,960
Speaker 2: the advice I would give.

301
00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:54,280
Speaker 1: Here's the advice i'd get. Yeah, what is wrong with

302
00:13:54,320 --> 00:13:54,800
Speaker 1: your sister?

303
00:13:56,400 --> 00:13:57,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, let's talk to her about all that.

304
00:13:58,000 --> 00:14:01,240
Speaker 1: Immediately telling you like, oh my god, no, it's He's

305
00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:04,920
Speaker 1: not just being like it's gonna be okay, everything's fine.

306
00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:07,000
Speaker 1: You need to be specific in that moment and say,

307
00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:08,560
Speaker 1: oh my god, no, oh my god, this has gone

308
00:14:08,600 --> 00:14:11,720
Speaker 1: so far off the rails. I need to fix this immediately. Yeah,

309
00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:14,439
Speaker 1: it's a secret trip. He's saying you want a trip.

310
00:14:14,480 --> 00:14:16,160
Speaker 1: He's reconacting with you. He's getting a gift.

311
00:14:16,320 --> 00:14:19,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, how exciting. That's gonna be so, so wonderful.

312
00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:23,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, the sister, dude, you gotta work on your delivery

313
00:14:23,360 --> 00:14:24,720
Speaker 2: on things for real.

314
00:14:25,840 --> 00:14:30,920
Speaker 5: You must, really, Honestly, I think some people get flustered

315
00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:32,240
Speaker 5: in the excitement.

316
00:14:32,880 --> 00:14:35,080
Speaker 3: I guess so. But there is a little bit more

317
00:14:35,160 --> 00:14:36,200
Speaker 3: to the story.

318
00:14:37,760 --> 00:14:40,960
Speaker 2: I'm a little concerned by how unhinged I became.

319
00:14:41,400 --> 00:14:42,920
Speaker 3: I think I need to work on that.

320
00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:45,120
Speaker 2: It's not like me. What am I going to do

321
00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:48,200
Speaker 2: if a real crisis comes along. Some people were saying.

322
00:14:47,920 --> 00:14:50,920
Speaker 3: That I am codependent, and maybe they're right, but that's

323
00:14:50,960 --> 00:14:51,400
Speaker 3: for later.

324
00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:54,320
Speaker 2: Right for now, I'm enjoying my day with the kids

325
00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:56,400
Speaker 2: and looking forward to my trip. And there are some

326
00:14:56,520 --> 00:15:01,160
Speaker 2: comments coming. Number One, Jesus, when the sister didn't start.

327
00:15:00,920 --> 00:15:03,640
Speaker 3: Freaking out, I was like, dang, guess she's the mistress.

328
00:15:03,680 --> 00:15:05,120
Speaker 3: I'm definitely on readit too much.

329
00:15:05,560 --> 00:15:09,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's exactly where my mind went and where I'm

330
00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:12,680
Speaker 2: one hundred percent on readit too much. Probably would have

331
00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:14,400
Speaker 2: been better for the sister to tell the husband to

332
00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:16,800
Speaker 2: keep it a secret, but to tell her sister that, hey,

333
00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:19,360
Speaker 2: husband is planning a surprise, just so you know he

334
00:15:19,400 --> 00:15:20,160
Speaker 2: isn't cheating on you.

335
00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:22,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like you can just The sister.

336
00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:24,680
Speaker 2: Totally could have just told her over the phone like, no,

337
00:15:24,960 --> 00:15:28,080
Speaker 2: is a surprise, I'm in on it, don't worry, calm down,

338
00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:31,400
Speaker 2: instead of telling her to just calm down and then

339
00:15:32,560 --> 00:15:33,520
Speaker 2: just hang up.

340
00:15:33,720 --> 00:15:36,880
Speaker 1: I think now she's one hundred percent uh goofy for that.

341
00:15:37,040 --> 00:15:41,120
Speaker 5: I'm saying, calm down really gets a message across effectively

342
00:15:41,400 --> 00:15:43,920
Speaker 5: to all women. Yep, especially women.

343
00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:48,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, definitely, as a woman, I can just tell women

344
00:15:48,520 --> 00:15:49,080
Speaker 2: to calm down.

345
00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:51,720
Speaker 1: They have being told to calm down, Yeah.

346
00:15:52,520 --> 00:15:55,720
Speaker 4: Especially when they're really overwhelmed and they need too.

347
00:15:56,440 --> 00:15:57,600
Speaker 1: Especially if you're a man.

348
00:15:57,920 --> 00:16:01,760
Speaker 2: Especially if they're already kind of calm, that's the best

349
00:16:01,800 --> 00:16:03,480
Speaker 2: Way's best time.

350
00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:07,360
Speaker 1: If they're not even wound up, then they're just I

351
00:16:07,360 --> 00:16:09,160
Speaker 1: don't know, expressing themselves.

352
00:16:09,320 --> 00:16:11,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the best time to sell someone.

353
00:16:11,560 --> 00:16:15,160
Speaker 1: Whoa whoa, whoa whoa just a friendly Now whoa whoa,

354
00:16:15,840 --> 00:16:18,560
Speaker 1: there's a friendly reminder to stay calm.

355
00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:22,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, but uh, but that's the end of that story.

356
00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:26,240
Speaker 1: My wife's cat used to hate me, but now we're inseparable.

357
00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:28,920
Speaker 3: Oh isn't that just the best love story.

358
00:16:29,160 --> 00:16:32,280
Speaker 1: In twenty twenty, I moved in with my then girlfriend

359
00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:36,920
Speaker 1: now wife. Along with our shared life came a shared menagerie.

360
00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:41,360
Speaker 1: I brought my dog, Gemma. She brought two cats, Indie

361
00:16:41,680 --> 00:16:45,240
Speaker 1: and Pico, cute name. I had high hopes that the

362
00:16:45,320 --> 00:16:49,320
Speaker 1: animals would become some quirky Pixar style blended family, but

363
00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:52,320
Speaker 1: I was a fool. By the way, this comes from

364
00:16:52,400 --> 00:16:55,520
Speaker 1: user Battlescarred Bear, and if you want to submit your

365
00:16:55,560 --> 00:16:58,680
Speaker 1: own stories, go to the r slash showcase Storytime Separated.

366
00:16:59,040 --> 00:17:01,840
Speaker 1: I'm Dakota, Hi Angie, I'm Riley, and we're here to

367
00:17:01,880 --> 00:17:04,760
Speaker 1: give good advice goofy, But we don't have all the answers.

368
00:17:05,160 --> 00:17:08,480
Speaker 1: We only know what we would do in any given situation.

369
00:17:08,680 --> 00:17:11,520
Speaker 1: So you would do something different, tell us what it

370
00:17:11,560 --> 00:17:16,840
Speaker 1: is in the comments. Opie says Jemma was the sweetest scruffiest,

371
00:17:16,960 --> 00:17:20,080
Speaker 1: quietest old mutt you've ever met, the kind of dog

372
00:17:20,119 --> 00:17:23,320
Speaker 1: who looked like she'd seen things, but mostly just wanted

373
00:17:23,359 --> 00:17:25,640
Speaker 1: a gentle chest rub in a soft place to nap.

374
00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:28,600
Speaker 1: She loved cats in a way that felt like she

375
00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:33,680
Speaker 1: wished they were her pets. She never barked, didn't snuggle exactly,

376
00:17:33,760 --> 00:17:37,920
Speaker 1: but she'd lie nearby, always quietly hoping the cats might

377
00:17:38,040 --> 00:17:41,000
Speaker 1: someday love her back. She was the canine equivalent of

378
00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:42,920
Speaker 1: a kid on the first day of school, holding out

379
00:17:42,920 --> 00:17:45,720
Speaker 1: a juice box like friends.

380
00:17:45,280 --> 00:17:49,040
Speaker 3: Love it, friends love it, Friends love that Indy.

381
00:17:49,240 --> 00:17:51,600
Speaker 1: One of the cats was a Calico tabby with the

382
00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:55,920
Speaker 1: emotional range of a bomb about to go off, Chaos incarnate.

383
00:17:56,400 --> 00:18:00,320
Speaker 1: She hated the move, hated Gemma, hated everything really except

384
00:18:00,320 --> 00:18:03,560
Speaker 1: for my wife and somehow eventually me. For the first

385
00:18:03,640 --> 00:18:06,040
Speaker 1: year I lived there, she refused to come down to

386
00:18:06,080 --> 00:18:08,800
Speaker 1: the first floor. Eventually she came around to me, but

387
00:18:08,920 --> 00:18:13,640
Speaker 1: she never stopped treating Jemma like an unholy menace. Even

388
00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:17,080
Speaker 1: once she started hanging out downstairs. She would travel across

389
00:18:17,119 --> 00:18:22,040
Speaker 1: furniture and windowsills like a tiny, fluffy assassin, avoiding pressure

390
00:18:22,040 --> 00:18:26,560
Speaker 1: plates just to avoid setting paw where Jemma might have breathed,

391
00:18:28,600 --> 00:18:29,440
Speaker 1: that's a cat.

392
00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:30,639
Speaker 3: Yep, love it.

393
00:18:31,080 --> 00:18:33,280
Speaker 1: Poor Jemma had to give up on her dream of

394
00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:37,600
Speaker 1: having a cat buddy real fast after getting swatted undeservedly

395
00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:41,600
Speaker 1: one too many times. And then there was Peko. Pico

396
00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:44,679
Speaker 1: is a large orange tabby with the emotional resilience of

397
00:18:44,720 --> 00:18:48,400
Speaker 1: a wet loaf of bread, anxious, clinging, and completely devoted

398
00:18:48,440 --> 00:18:52,320
Speaker 1: to my wife. He didn't like me, He tolerated Jemma.

399
00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:56,399
Speaker 1: He hated cuddles unless they came from his chosen human.

400
00:18:56,880 --> 00:19:00,280
Speaker 1: If my wife closed her office door, he'd cry the

401
00:19:00,359 --> 00:19:04,119
Speaker 1: Romeo understudy in a high school drama class. He'd decide,

402
00:19:04,119 --> 00:19:06,159
Speaker 1: I me like I was the guy. She told him

403
00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:09,480
Speaker 1: not to worry about. We had an understanding. I exist

404
00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:12,600
Speaker 1: and he pretended I didn't. So that was our house

405
00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:17,960
Speaker 1: for years, Gemma trying to exist peacefully with lingering hope,

406
00:19:18,680 --> 00:19:26,320
Speaker 1: Indie radiating uh vibes or snuggling my head with biggrudging affection,

407
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:31,719
Speaker 1: Peico ignoring me with great enthusiasm. It was an uneasy truce,

408
00:19:31,800 --> 00:19:38,359
Speaker 1: but it held. Two years ago, Jemma passed peacefully at sixteen.

409
00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:42,439
Speaker 1: A few months later, Indy, who had slowly warmed up

410
00:19:42,480 --> 00:19:46,040
Speaker 1: to me. Over time, decided I was her person. She

411
00:19:46,160 --> 00:19:50,679
Speaker 1: got clingy, she'd catterwall when I left, sleep on my

412
00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:54,280
Speaker 1: chest and my head and my back, wherever she could

413
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:59,520
Speaker 1: drape her angry little body, full gremlin energy, but affectionate. Recently,

414
00:19:59,520 --> 00:20:02,760
Speaker 1: Indie's health health declined. She had a worsening heart murmur,

415
00:20:02,760 --> 00:20:04,800
Speaker 1: and about a month ago we made the difficult decision

416
00:20:04,800 --> 00:20:08,639
Speaker 1: to let her go gently. She was seventeen. Oh, you

417
00:20:08,720 --> 00:20:13,679
Speaker 1: were devastated all over again. And then, immediately after Indy's passing,

418
00:20:13,840 --> 00:20:18,360
Speaker 1: like within a few days, something shifted peco change. Suddenly,

419
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:20,960
Speaker 1: the cat who had been ignoring me for four years

420
00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:24,000
Speaker 1: became obsessed with me. He sleeps with me at night,

421
00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:26,680
Speaker 1: now rolls over for belly rubs like I'm some kind

422
00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:30,439
Speaker 1: of feline massage therapist. He insists on being in my

423
00:20:30,560 --> 00:20:33,600
Speaker 1: office all day. If I go back to bed, he

424
00:20:33,640 --> 00:20:36,000
Speaker 1: climbs in and snuggles up like I'm the last patch

425
00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:38,720
Speaker 1: of sunlight in the universe. He wants me to feed

426
00:20:38,800 --> 00:20:42,359
Speaker 1: him now, and he'll ignore my wife is actual person

427
00:20:42,440 --> 00:20:47,040
Speaker 1: to come bop my chair and demand attention all Then

428
00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:52,200
Speaker 1: he purrs like a lawnmower and uh and looks at

429
00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:55,480
Speaker 1: me with the kind of absolute adoration usually reserved for

430
00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:59,360
Speaker 1: cult leaders and those who opened cans. We didn't change

431
00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:02,760
Speaker 1: our routine, we didn't rearrange the house. My wife is

432
00:21:02,800 --> 00:21:05,280
Speaker 1: still very much present and fully available for cuddles.

433
00:21:05,880 --> 00:21:07,760
Speaker 3: But he co is acting like.

434
00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:10,680
Speaker 1: I'm as long lost soulmate and he's making up for

435
00:21:10,880 --> 00:21:14,639
Speaker 1: lost time, which leaves both of us, me and my wife,

436
00:21:14,680 --> 00:21:19,120
Speaker 1: completely baffled. I have several theories. Indeed believed him into

437
00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:22,320
Speaker 1: keeping his distance, and now that she's gone, he's free

438
00:21:22,359 --> 00:21:26,359
Speaker 1: to pursue this forbidden human romance. He's grieving in somehow senses.

439
00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:29,320
Speaker 1: I'm grieving too, but it feels less like let's heal

440
00:21:29,440 --> 00:21:33,240
Speaker 1: together and more like rub my belly grief monkey. This

441
00:21:33,359 --> 00:21:36,440
Speaker 1: is a long shot, but he's softening me up for something.

442
00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:39,760
Speaker 1: I don't know what. He's terrible at being a cat,

443
00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:44,560
Speaker 1: so probably not me, but definitely something. The shift has

444
00:21:44,680 --> 00:21:47,760
Speaker 1: been instant and total. Feel like I'm living with a

445
00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:51,760
Speaker 1: completely different animal. Nothing else has changed. My wife is

446
00:21:51,800 --> 00:21:54,560
Speaker 1: still here. She is supposed to be his person, but

447
00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:57,400
Speaker 1: now apparently I am. Has anyone else had a cat

448
00:21:57,440 --> 00:22:00,520
Speaker 1: pulled this kind of emotional U turn like I'm living

449
00:22:00,520 --> 00:22:03,520
Speaker 1: with a completely different animal now I mean, I'm not complaining.

450
00:22:04,119 --> 00:22:06,880
Speaker 1: He's a great cuddler and he's terrible at being a cat,

451
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:09,639
Speaker 1: and that's sort of charming in its own right. But

452
00:22:09,680 --> 00:22:12,360
Speaker 1: I feel like I missed something here. Is this normal?

453
00:22:12,960 --> 00:22:16,240
Speaker 1: Is this grief? Is he just now realizing I give

454
00:22:16,520 --> 00:22:20,119
Speaker 1: excellent belly robs? Is it a glitch in the cat matrix?

455
00:22:20,800 --> 00:22:23,480
Speaker 1: Or have I been a mark all along? And there

456
00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:26,400
Speaker 1: is an update? I would say it's probably the cat's

457
00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:31,040
Speaker 1: grieving and replacing the relationship it had with Indy.

458
00:22:31,160 --> 00:22:34,439
Speaker 2: With you, yeah, I would guess that either replacing the

459
00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:39,560
Speaker 2: relationship or the pets and cuddles and stuff is like

460
00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:43,240
Speaker 2: very comforting in his grief. And so if he's you know,

461
00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:46,240
Speaker 2: seems like he's not grieving with you, but he's just

462
00:22:46,320 --> 00:22:48,800
Speaker 2: kind of there for all the attention and stuff.

463
00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:52,200
Speaker 3: Maybe that's just helping him with his grief loneliness.

464
00:22:52,760 --> 00:22:56,040
Speaker 2: So it's yeah, it seems like a kind of normal thing,

465
00:22:56,400 --> 00:22:56,919
Speaker 2: just lonely.

466
00:22:57,040 --> 00:22:59,240
Speaker 1: I think it's it's relatively normal.

467
00:22:59,520 --> 00:23:00,480
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah.

468
00:23:01,080 --> 00:23:04,200
Speaker 1: Update. It's been over a month since I posted about

469
00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:07,200
Speaker 1: the situation, and I can tell you I'm slowly going insane.

470
00:23:07,440 --> 00:23:10,639
Speaker 1: But many of you responded to that post, alluding to

471
00:23:10,680 --> 00:23:12,720
Speaker 1: some version of the theory that Indy, our cat who

472
00:23:12,720 --> 00:23:16,480
Speaker 1: recently passed, had claimed me as hers, that she had

473
00:23:16,560 --> 00:23:19,399
Speaker 1: kept the other cat, pe Coo, from me. I have

474
00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:21,720
Speaker 1: now come to believe this may be true, but not

475
00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:24,480
Speaker 1: in the way you all thought. I think she was

476
00:23:24,560 --> 00:23:27,720
Speaker 1: protecting me from him. One might even say she did

477
00:23:27,760 --> 00:23:31,440
Speaker 1: it for his own good. He does not stop meowing.

478
00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:35,200
Speaker 1: Am I exaggerating? Of course I am. He's not capable

479
00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:40,160
Speaker 1: of uttering a constant, repeating, irritating now every second on

480
00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:43,960
Speaker 1: the second for all eighty six four hundred seconds of

481
00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:48,520
Speaker 1: the day. He's asleep for approximately sixteen to eighteen hours

482
00:23:48,560 --> 00:23:51,000
Speaker 1: of it. He also spends ten to thirty seconds per

483
00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:56,160
Speaker 1: meal inhaling the variety of damp brown pete like meat

484
00:23:56,760 --> 00:24:00,720
Speaker 1: pastes we drop onto his ornate flower shape ceramic cat

485
00:24:00,760 --> 00:24:02,640
Speaker 1: dish multiple times a day.

486
00:24:03,080 --> 00:24:05,520
Speaker 2: Thank you for clarifying. I really did think that it

487
00:24:06,119 --> 00:24:14,720
Speaker 2: was in fact, twenty four hours a day. Yeah, not eating,

488
00:24:15,920 --> 00:24:16,960
Speaker 2: not going out, not.

489
00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:20,080
Speaker 3: Sleeping, So thank you. I really appreciate you for hearing that.

490
00:24:20,400 --> 00:24:25,359
Speaker 1: Thanks meow. He is capable of keeping up that unrelenting

491
00:24:25,400 --> 00:24:28,640
Speaker 1: pace of meowing for several consecutive minutes, sometimes as many

492
00:24:28,680 --> 00:24:33,440
Speaker 1: as fifteen bundled together into an episode of mind eroding

493
00:24:33,600 --> 00:24:37,800
Speaker 1: sonic torture. It's not loud, it's worse than loud. It's

494
00:24:37,840 --> 00:24:41,600
Speaker 1: like a psychic lance to my skull, as though someone

495
00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:44,600
Speaker 1: is tapping on the blackboard of my mind with chalk

496
00:24:44,680 --> 00:24:50,320
Speaker 1: dusted fingers, little scratches of nerve, wrenching shocks to my sarahbellum,

497
00:24:50,480 --> 00:24:54,520
Speaker 1: over and over and over again. Now, ma'ah, I have

498
00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:58,879
Speaker 1: ascertained some of the meanings of his belligerence. The purpose

499
00:24:58,920 --> 00:25:03,399
Speaker 1: of these verbal harmful acts are many. Here are just

500
00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:06,320
Speaker 1: a few of the reasons he has decided to employ

501
00:25:06,400 --> 00:25:10,120
Speaker 1: this persuasion technique. He would like his breakfast approximately three

502
00:25:10,160 --> 00:25:13,040
Speaker 1: hours early five am. He would like a second serving

503
00:25:13,040 --> 00:25:16,399
Speaker 1: of breakfast. He thinks he can convince whichever one of

504
00:25:16,440 --> 00:25:19,240
Speaker 1: us didn't serve him breakfast that he hasn't had breakfast yet.

505
00:25:19,640 --> 00:25:22,960
Speaker 1: He would like some of mine. He would like lunch. Now, yes,

506
00:25:23,359 --> 00:25:25,760
Speaker 1: he has recently decided he would like lunch. He's thirsty.

507
00:25:26,080 --> 00:25:29,199
Speaker 1: He of course has a massive cycling water bowl, but

508
00:25:29,240 --> 00:25:31,679
Speaker 1: it seems he must announce when he's heading off for

509
00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:34,200
Speaker 1: a drink. He would like an afternoon snack. He would

510
00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:36,920
Speaker 1: like my afternoon snack. He is wondering if he can

511
00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:39,600
Speaker 1: have some of our dinner. He would like his own dinner.

512
00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:42,280
Speaker 1: He would like my wife to stop singing. He would

513
00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:44,240
Speaker 1: like to be pet. He would like to be drawn

514
00:25:44,280 --> 00:25:46,199
Speaker 1: into a cuddle and pet. He would like to be

515
00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:48,000
Speaker 1: drawn into a cuddle and pet. At one in the morning.

516
00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:49,679
Speaker 1: He would like to be drawn into a cuddle and

517
00:25:49,680 --> 00:25:51,320
Speaker 1: pet at three in the morning. He would like to

518
00:25:51,359 --> 00:25:53,040
Speaker 1: have a post breakfast cuddle. He would like to have

519
00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:55,040
Speaker 1: a post dinner cuddle. He would like to be elevated

520
00:25:55,080 --> 00:25:56,600
Speaker 1: onto the bed. He would like to be de elevated

521
00:25:56,600 --> 00:25:59,000
Speaker 1: from the bed. Here are two things he does not

522
00:25:59,240 --> 00:26:02,240
Speaker 1: utilize this skill for warning us he is about to

523
00:26:02,320 --> 00:26:05,600
Speaker 1: barf a hairball or his dinner onto the bed, letting

524
00:26:05,640 --> 00:26:08,000
Speaker 1: us know he has failed to reach the litter boxes

525
00:26:08,000 --> 00:26:11,800
Speaker 1: and has instead opted to poop on the stairs. Yammiamao.

526
00:26:12,440 --> 00:26:15,920
Speaker 1: And finally, to explain the elevation points and the yet

527
00:26:16,000 --> 00:26:19,840
Speaker 1: unmentioned and most egregious use of this newfound misuse of

528
00:26:19,880 --> 00:26:22,920
Speaker 1: his vocal powers, I must explain that my desk, where

529
00:26:22,960 --> 00:26:25,960
Speaker 1: I work most days, is in a cubby in our bedroom.

530
00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:29,399
Speaker 1: Directly behind me is our marital bed, which, in his

531
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:32,119
Speaker 1: ascension and self grounding as king of this domain he

532
00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:36,000
Speaker 1: has claimed as his royal throne. Yes, there are stairs

533
00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:38,320
Speaker 1: installed at the end of the bed. Yes he is

534
00:26:38,400 --> 00:26:42,639
Speaker 1: perfectly capable of using them. But no, he does not

535
00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:46,280
Speaker 1: lower himself to such indignities when his human powered elevation

536
00:26:46,359 --> 00:26:50,359
Speaker 1: device is present. To be clear, I am that human

537
00:26:50,400 --> 00:26:54,680
Speaker 1: powered elevation device, not my wife, not any other nearby human.

538
00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:59,560
Speaker 1: Just me. Yiamiao miaow Miao. This leads us to the

539
00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:04,439
Speaker 1: newest and most heart melting yet infuriating implementation of his

540
00:27:04,600 --> 00:27:10,080
Speaker 1: royal declarations, begging for my attention, not just my attention,

541
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:13,760
Speaker 1: but a very specific form of attention that he bypasses

542
00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:17,600
Speaker 1: my wife for entirely. She cannot perform this task. Apparently

543
00:27:17,640 --> 00:27:21,880
Speaker 1: only I can. Miyamiyamiyamiamiyamiya. Even as I write this, he's

544
00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:23,760
Speaker 1: pawing at the back of my chair, demanding that I

545
00:27:23,800 --> 00:27:27,960
Speaker 1: perform my duty. That duty is belly rubs. It's not

546
00:27:28,119 --> 00:27:30,960
Speaker 1: just any old belly rubs. He likes when I grasp

547
00:27:31,080 --> 00:27:34,200
Speaker 1: him firmly but gently, press my head against him and

548
00:27:34,320 --> 00:27:37,560
Speaker 1: flop him down onto his side, a gesture that began

549
00:27:37,600 --> 00:27:41,479
Speaker 1: out of pure frustration after being interrupted for the seventh

550
00:27:41,520 --> 00:27:43,920
Speaker 1: time in an hour, I pressed him to the bed

551
00:27:43,960 --> 00:27:47,639
Speaker 1: and gave him a fury fueled belly rub as recriminations

552
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:52,520
Speaker 1: for his bad behavior, only to have him start purring loudly.

553
00:27:54,160 --> 00:28:00,879
Speaker 2: Oh, this is so funny. I love cats. I love cats, honey.

554
00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:04,600
Speaker 3: Darn ah.

555
00:28:04,960 --> 00:28:12,359
Speaker 1: Cat's like, Oh, okay, only that forever. You've officially signed

556
00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:13,920
Speaker 1: up to do that forever.

557
00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:16,360
Speaker 3: That's so good.

558
00:28:16,600 --> 00:28:19,119
Speaker 1: The same way he used to purr for my wife

559
00:28:19,200 --> 00:28:21,560
Speaker 1: when she would relent and let him cuddle her in

560
00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:26,439
Speaker 1: the wee hours, a perr I once interpreted as a petulant, performative,

561
00:28:26,520 --> 00:28:30,000
Speaker 1: dramatic cat version of see fat man, she loves me

562
00:28:30,080 --> 00:28:36,119
Speaker 1: more yamiyamyamyamyamyamiy amy all. Now, weeks later, I must repeat

563
00:28:36,119 --> 00:28:38,840
Speaker 1: this ritual several times a day. I'm not allowed on

564
00:28:38,920 --> 00:28:42,040
Speaker 1: the bed with him. I must remain seated in my chair,

565
00:28:42,160 --> 00:28:44,920
Speaker 1: leaning over him so he can paw at my shirt

566
00:28:45,040 --> 00:28:47,880
Speaker 1: or attempt to clean my face. He either wants to

567
00:28:47,920 --> 00:28:50,080
Speaker 1: be fully on his back, clinging to my arm with

568
00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:53,160
Speaker 1: his front paws, or slightly on his side, kneading the

569
00:28:53,280 --> 00:28:56,480
Speaker 1: air like a baker of invisible biscuits. Is it cute,

570
00:28:56,560 --> 00:29:02,120
Speaker 1: of course? Is it annoying and inconvenient? Most exclusively when

571
00:29:02,200 --> 00:29:05,120
Speaker 1: I am in meetings. Now, when I am deep in

572
00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:09,040
Speaker 1: a programming binge, Now, when I am desperately trying to

573
00:29:09,120 --> 00:29:13,880
Speaker 1: maintain focus on a passage of prose. Wow, when I'm

574
00:29:13,960 --> 00:29:20,840
Speaker 1: trying to watch coarse material for work. Meow, meamiamiamiaomao, meamiami amiao.

575
00:29:22,640 --> 00:29:27,680
Speaker 1: It's slowly eroding away at my tether. I can feel

576
00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:31,440
Speaker 1: each utterance pierce into the meaty noodles of my gray matter,

577
00:29:31,640 --> 00:29:36,040
Speaker 1: like an infestation of furry caterpillars growling amongst my neurals.

578
00:29:36,640 --> 00:29:39,080
Speaker 1: And yet, how can I be angry with him? How

579
00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:43,640
Speaker 1: can I be annoyed? His aged pur muscles sputtering as

580
00:29:43,720 --> 00:29:47,120
Speaker 1: I stroke his belly, sounding like an ancient lawn tractor

581
00:29:47,240 --> 00:29:50,600
Speaker 1: lurching back to life, the engine struggling to turn over,

582
00:29:50,800 --> 00:29:53,600
Speaker 1: even with the choke fully pulled out. Sometimes I try

583
00:29:53,640 --> 00:29:56,440
Speaker 1: to re establish my grasp of reality by engaging these

584
00:29:56,640 --> 00:30:01,480
Speaker 1: mulings in conversation. Meow, I'm so I didn't catch that. Meow. No,

585
00:30:02,240 --> 00:30:05,320
Speaker 1: it's not time for your dinner yet, buddy. Now, you

586
00:30:05,320 --> 00:30:08,560
Speaker 1: wouldn't talk to your mother like that. Now, it's not

587
00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:12,240
Speaker 1: okay to use that kind of language in this house. Now, Seriously,

588
00:30:12,920 --> 00:30:17,160
Speaker 1: Where did you learn that word? It was not from me. Yeah,

589
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:20,560
Speaker 1: you've discovered the thing you do talk to your cat.

590
00:30:21,080 --> 00:30:25,120
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, is it working? I don't know. My wife

591
00:30:25,200 --> 00:30:29,480
Speaker 1: and mother in law bind these exchanges hilarious. They don't

592
00:30:29,520 --> 00:30:32,080
Speaker 1: realize this is my last ditch effort to keep my sanity.

593
00:30:32,720 --> 00:30:35,640
Speaker 1: I don't think it's working. I am losing it. He

594
00:30:35,760 --> 00:30:38,400
Speaker 1: never stops until he gets what he wants. Any sense

595
00:30:38,440 --> 00:30:41,000
Speaker 1: of autonomy I had as an adult has rotted away.

596
00:30:41,760 --> 00:30:43,840
Speaker 1: I no longer feel in control of my day, let

597
00:30:43,880 --> 00:30:46,360
Speaker 1: alone the idea of having any say in my destiny.

598
00:30:46,840 --> 00:30:52,760
Speaker 1: This is why the Egyptians worshiped cats. Oh yeah, they're

599
00:30:52,840 --> 00:30:58,240
Speaker 1: like we have to They was shut up. I have

600
00:30:58,400 --> 00:31:02,080
Speaker 1: no choice here. I must comply. I can only choose

601
00:31:02,160 --> 00:31:05,400
Speaker 1: to endure or comply. There is no relief from it.

602
00:31:06,080 --> 00:31:10,600
Speaker 1: I have no mouth, but I must meaow. Miamia miao, ma'ao,

603
00:31:11,080 --> 00:31:15,600
Speaker 1: miamia mia miam meow. Is this why we often jest

604
00:31:15,640 --> 00:31:19,040
Speaker 1: about cats owning us? It doesn't feel so funny anymore.

605
00:31:19,080 --> 00:31:23,880
Speaker 1: It feels horrifyingly, viscerally unerringly true. I once believed I

606
00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:28,400
Speaker 1: was terrorized by the other cat, her machinations and demands.

607
00:31:28,480 --> 00:31:32,320
Speaker 1: Feeling pointed. But now I wonder have I been inherited

608
00:31:32,520 --> 00:31:35,480
Speaker 1: past like a crown from one master to the next.

609
00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:38,280
Speaker 1: Is this orange monster? Am I Joffrey?

610
00:31:38,760 --> 00:31:38,880
Speaker 2: Oh?

611
00:31:38,960 --> 00:31:42,440
Speaker 1: No, I can feel myself coming unglued at times, and

612
00:31:42,560 --> 00:31:45,640
Speaker 1: the conversations take a darker turn. I'll turn to my

613
00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:48,760
Speaker 1: wife and say, listen, I'm not one hundred percent on

614
00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:50,880
Speaker 1: the translation, but I'm pretty sure he's saying he's tired

615
00:31:50,920 --> 00:31:52,560
Speaker 1: of it here and he'd like to be taken to

616
00:31:52,600 --> 00:31:55,200
Speaker 1: the shelter to find a more extravagant home, something more

617
00:31:55,240 --> 00:31:58,160
Speaker 1: suited to his proclivities. Or I'm pretty sure he just

618
00:31:58,240 --> 00:32:01,280
Speaker 1: said it's time to cut the apron. He's ready to

619
00:32:01,280 --> 00:32:02,880
Speaker 1: get out there and get a job and find a

620
00:32:02,920 --> 00:32:05,600
Speaker 1: place of his own. I think we should support him

621
00:32:05,640 --> 00:32:09,880
Speaker 1: in gaining his independence. She finds these less funny, especially

622
00:32:10,000 --> 00:32:12,200
Speaker 1: since I've repeated them enough that she now warns of

623
00:32:12,240 --> 00:32:15,920
Speaker 1: severe consequences if I even think such a thing. Do

624
00:32:16,120 --> 00:32:20,120
Speaker 1: I think such a thing? Only in jest? I assure you.

625
00:32:21,000 --> 00:32:23,120
Speaker 1: I may be going mad, but I'm not a monster.

626
00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:25,479
Speaker 1: I would never hurt the cat or any other creature.

627
00:32:25,960 --> 00:32:28,280
Speaker 1: I'm gentle with them, and I love them more than people.

628
00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:32,160
Speaker 1: Even this cat, this cat who tests the limits of

629
00:32:32,200 --> 00:32:34,840
Speaker 1: the love between us. I do love him, I do

630
00:32:35,080 --> 00:32:43,360
Speaker 1: I swear miyamiamiamiao miaomiami'a mea me ol meow. I'm just baffled. Annoyed, certainly,

631
00:32:43,440 --> 00:32:48,240
Speaker 1: but mostly baffled. Why does he like this ritual so much?

632
00:32:49,040 --> 00:32:53,000
Speaker 1: Is this play for him or some elaborate humiliation ritual

633
00:32:53,080 --> 00:32:55,880
Speaker 1: for me that I do not yet fully comprehend. If

634
00:32:55,920 --> 00:32:57,640
Speaker 1: I stop and turn back to my work, he will

635
00:32:57,680 --> 00:32:59,640
Speaker 1: wait a few minutes then cry for me again, and

636
00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:03,200
Speaker 1: when I return, he has stood up again. So being

637
00:33:03,360 --> 00:33:06,800
Speaker 1: rocked over is part of it. But why why is

638
00:33:06,880 --> 00:33:09,000
Speaker 1: he so particular? What does it mean? What is this?

639
00:33:09,800 --> 00:33:09,960
Speaker 2: Ya?

640
00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:13,520
Speaker 1: Me ami amia me ami ami ami ami ami ho.

641
00:33:14,160 --> 00:33:17,240
Speaker 1: We have a little bit more story, but like I mean, clearly,

642
00:33:17,440 --> 00:33:20,000
Speaker 1: you know this is probably more than half of just

643
00:33:20,080 --> 00:33:25,000
Speaker 1: a creative writing exercise. But like it. You gotta just,

644
00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:29,320
Speaker 1: you know, at this point, outsource like an engineer to

645
00:33:29,400 --> 00:33:32,800
Speaker 1: build some kind of machine to give your cat the

646
00:33:33,640 --> 00:33:38,520
Speaker 1: belly rub. Order of operations. Yeah, grab, turn on side,

647
00:33:38,680 --> 00:33:43,040
Speaker 1: flip over, scretch, grush grush crush. Yeah, yeah, let's finish

648
00:33:43,160 --> 00:33:43,520
Speaker 1: this story.

649
00:33:43,680 --> 00:33:44,120
Speaker 3: Let's do it.

650
00:33:44,440 --> 00:33:48,040
Speaker 1: I am resigned to my fate. I will act as

651
00:33:48,160 --> 00:33:51,520
Speaker 1: his personal elevator, and I will serve him his rubs

652
00:33:51,600 --> 00:33:55,320
Speaker 1: of the belly. I do and will find mental fortitude

653
00:33:55,760 --> 00:33:59,360
Speaker 1: and emotional sustenance as he enjoys my attention. I will

654
00:33:59,440 --> 00:34:01,680
Speaker 1: let my heart melt as he grasped my arm, or

655
00:34:01,760 --> 00:34:03,720
Speaker 1: when he pawsed my shirt, or when he makes his

656
00:34:03,840 --> 00:34:06,920
Speaker 1: air biscuits. But why are the air biscuits he makes

657
00:34:06,960 --> 00:34:11,480
Speaker 1: so slow and so delicious? Even as I write this

658
00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:16,040
Speaker 1: final line, Pico continues his relentless campaign. He has successfully

659
00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:18,960
Speaker 1: transformed from the cat who once ignored me into my

660
00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:23,279
Speaker 1: most demanding and affectionate tormentor. I suppose that's what love

661
00:34:23,360 --> 00:34:26,840
Speaker 1: looks like in the feline world, Complete and utter domination,

662
00:34:27,320 --> 00:34:30,200
Speaker 1: wrapped in the softest orange fur, and delivered with the

663
00:34:30,280 --> 00:34:34,359
Speaker 1: persistence of a telemarketer who knows your home. This tangerine

664
00:34:34,520 --> 00:34:36,840
Speaker 1: terror has claimed me as her own, and I fear

665
00:34:36,880 --> 00:34:40,320
Speaker 1: there's no going back. And that is the end of

666
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:43,560
Speaker 1: that story. Hey, it's Sam, your ogi host here bring

667
00:34:43,640 --> 00:34:45,399
Speaker 1: you back to the stories. But here's three minutes fads

668
00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:46,040
Speaker 1: from our sponsor.

669
00:34:46,680 --> 00:34:50,560
Speaker 2: My ex best friend married my ex husband, but she

670
00:34:50,800 --> 00:34:52,640
Speaker 2: hired me to make their cake.

671
00:34:53,040 --> 00:34:54,600
Speaker 1: I would not take that job.

672
00:34:54,880 --> 00:34:57,360
Speaker 3: I thirty three female, am in a bit of a dilemma.

673
00:34:57,640 --> 00:35:00,239
Speaker 2: You see, my ex best friend thirty one female, had

674
00:35:00,280 --> 00:35:03,160
Speaker 2: an affair with my ex husband thirty four mail when

675
00:35:03,239 --> 00:35:04,120
Speaker 2: we were married.

676
00:35:04,320 --> 00:35:06,440
Speaker 3: Our friendship fell apart right there.

677
00:35:06,680 --> 00:35:08,879
Speaker 2: I didn't have any contact with her until a month

678
00:35:08,920 --> 00:35:11,400
Speaker 2: ago when she called me saying that she wasn't happy

679
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:12,200
Speaker 2: with her life.

680
00:35:12,360 --> 00:35:15,319
Speaker 3: I have moved on with mine. I don't need their shenanigans.

681
00:35:15,520 --> 00:35:17,680
Speaker 2: And by the way, this comes from top File fifteen

682
00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:19,520
Speaker 2: sixty And if you want to submit your own stories,

683
00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:21,040
Speaker 2: go to the hours slash Okay Storytime.

684
00:35:21,080 --> 00:35:21,520
Speaker 3: Separate it.

685
00:35:21,800 --> 00:35:25,239
Speaker 4: So I'm Angie, I'm Dakota, I'm Riley.

686
00:35:25,080 --> 00:35:28,359
Speaker 2: And Opie says. I run a small baking business that's

687
00:35:28,520 --> 00:35:31,440
Speaker 2: relatively new. I only take orders for cakes on occasions

688
00:35:31,480 --> 00:35:35,440
Speaker 2: like birthdays, graduations, or reunions, except for weddings. I have

689
00:35:35,800 --> 00:35:38,279
Speaker 2: some plans to expand it and dream of opening my

690
00:35:38,360 --> 00:35:40,560
Speaker 2: own bakery. One day, a few days ago, I got

691
00:35:40,600 --> 00:35:43,440
Speaker 2: an order from my ex best friend. She wanted me

692
00:35:43,600 --> 00:35:46,600
Speaker 2: to make desserts for her son's first birthday. She didn't

693
00:35:46,680 --> 00:35:48,920
Speaker 2: just want a birthday cake, but also a whole dessert

694
00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:51,279
Speaker 2: section for the party. It's a huge order and the

695
00:35:51,360 --> 00:35:53,520
Speaker 2: pay is good. It would be great for my business.

696
00:35:53,680 --> 00:35:56,240
Speaker 2: But as you can see, she and I have history

697
00:35:56,719 --> 00:35:59,279
Speaker 2: that This made me question why she wants me to

698
00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:02,000
Speaker 2: do it. Comes from a well to do family and

699
00:36:02,160 --> 00:36:04,480
Speaker 2: has a high paying job. She could easily hire the

700
00:36:04,520 --> 00:36:05,560
Speaker 2: best baker in town.

701
00:36:05,960 --> 00:36:08,280
Speaker 3: Why does she want me to do it? My business

702
00:36:08,360 --> 00:36:09,160
Speaker 3: isn't that big yet.

703
00:36:09,360 --> 00:36:11,600
Speaker 2: It made me feel like she's trying to grab my attention,

704
00:36:11,960 --> 00:36:14,200
Speaker 2: sabotage my business, or maybe she wants to talk to

705
00:36:14,280 --> 00:36:16,640
Speaker 2: me after I shunned her last time. On the other hand,

706
00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:18,960
Speaker 2: the business woman inside me says, to take it.

707
00:36:19,160 --> 00:36:19,920
Speaker 3: I know I can do it.

708
00:36:20,120 --> 00:36:22,040
Speaker 2: The party is huge and there will be many people

709
00:36:22,080 --> 00:36:24,920
Speaker 2: from affluent backgrounds. I can promote my business to those

710
00:36:24,960 --> 00:36:27,320
Speaker 2: people and boost my revenue. I'm thinking if I just

711
00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:29,080
Speaker 2: avoid her as much as possible.

712
00:36:28,719 --> 00:36:30,080
Speaker 3: Then it will be good. But I don't know.

713
00:36:30,400 --> 00:36:33,239
Speaker 2: I'm stuck in between. I need some good advice. But

714
00:36:33,320 --> 00:36:35,480
Speaker 2: do have some comments coming. Number one says, take it.

715
00:36:35,680 --> 00:36:38,520
Speaker 2: Make them the best cake. You can show them that

716
00:36:38,640 --> 00:36:41,200
Speaker 2: you're not bothered by either of them. The best payback

717
00:36:41,360 --> 00:36:43,839
Speaker 2: is no payback. Opie says, Hey, at least this way

718
00:36:43,840 --> 00:36:46,120
Speaker 2: I will get some money, considering I wasted my twenties

719
00:36:46,160 --> 00:36:50,040
Speaker 2: and an ungrateful man child. Someone else responds after reading

720
00:36:50,120 --> 00:36:52,520
Speaker 2: this saga, I am wondering if your ex best friend

721
00:36:52,600 --> 00:36:54,439
Speaker 2: is trying to use this to get you to talk

722
00:36:54,480 --> 00:36:54,719
Speaker 2: with her.

723
00:36:54,840 --> 00:36:57,080
Speaker 3: I personally would not trust her for anything.

724
00:36:57,239 --> 00:36:59,040
Speaker 2: My concern is that, yes, there will be a lot

725
00:36:59,080 --> 00:37:02,719
Speaker 2: of influential people there, and this kid promote your business. Conversely,

726
00:37:03,000 --> 00:37:05,520
Speaker 2: she could also turn on you if it's not perfect

727
00:37:05,600 --> 00:37:08,880
Speaker 2: and ruin you. Considering her backstabbing history, that would not

728
00:37:09,040 --> 00:37:11,040
Speaker 2: be a risk I would want to take Commy Number

729
00:37:11,040 --> 00:37:12,920
Speaker 2: two says, I don't think you should do it. You

730
00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:15,080
Speaker 2: said that there is a lot of interaction when planning

731
00:37:15,120 --> 00:37:17,400
Speaker 2: the bake, and you're likely to have to stay for

732
00:37:17,520 --> 00:37:19,600
Speaker 2: the party. You might be over the X and the

733
00:37:19,680 --> 00:37:22,520
Speaker 2: ex best friend, but there's some weird game going on here,

734
00:37:22,640 --> 00:37:24,600
Speaker 2: and the idea of you having to be on display

735
00:37:24,719 --> 00:37:27,239
Speaker 2: at their party while whatever the f they're playing at

736
00:37:27,719 --> 00:37:30,680
Speaker 2: unravels around you while you're surrounded by your former in

737
00:37:30,840 --> 00:37:33,960
Speaker 2: laws sounds like a nightmare. Fuel I have a suspicion

738
00:37:34,120 --> 00:37:37,160
Speaker 2: you are a pawd and no matter how professional you are,

739
00:37:37,440 --> 00:37:40,479
Speaker 2: you will be dragged into their drama. I honestly didn't

740
00:37:40,480 --> 00:37:43,440
Speaker 2: even realize that like, yeah, her ex in laws are

741
00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:44,239
Speaker 2: also going to be there.

742
00:37:44,239 --> 00:37:46,200
Speaker 3: If this is like a baby party.

743
00:37:46,080 --> 00:37:49,040
Speaker 1: If you can show up and be unbothered, that I

744
00:37:49,239 --> 00:37:52,279
Speaker 1: would agree. I agree that that's the best thing to do. Yeah,

745
00:37:52,440 --> 00:37:55,239
Speaker 1: if it's gonna ruin you, then don't do it. But

746
00:37:55,440 --> 00:37:58,160
Speaker 1: if you can, if you can swing that, then like

747
00:37:58,600 --> 00:38:00,520
Speaker 1: even if they if they have then mal In Tent

748
00:38:00,719 --> 00:38:02,120
Speaker 1: was like, oh my god, it's gonna drive her crazy.

749
00:38:02,280 --> 00:38:05,440
Speaker 1: It'll then drive them crazy that you're not being driven insane.

750
00:38:06,000 --> 00:38:07,720
Speaker 2: Taking the job and hopes that you can get business

751
00:38:07,719 --> 00:38:09,600
Speaker 2: from their friends will only work if your ex and

752
00:38:09,719 --> 00:38:12,360
Speaker 2: ex friend allow you to stay all business.

753
00:38:12,960 --> 00:38:14,279
Speaker 3: Do you really think that will happen?

754
00:38:14,400 --> 00:38:17,399
Speaker 1: And we do have an update, so that's true. What's

755
00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:19,840
Speaker 1: going to happen? I think that's entirely up to you.

756
00:38:19,920 --> 00:38:21,640
Speaker 1: If you stay all business, they can come up to

757
00:38:21,640 --> 00:38:24,719
Speaker 1: you and be like and you can just go not

758
00:38:24,960 --> 00:38:25,520
Speaker 1: say anything.

759
00:38:25,600 --> 00:38:27,920
Speaker 3: I don't want to talk about personal things over but.

760
00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:30,319
Speaker 1: Not everyone could do this. So if you determine, if

761
00:38:30,320 --> 00:38:32,600
Speaker 1: you think you if you can't, then you can't. Update.

762
00:38:33,719 --> 00:38:37,600
Speaker 2: OHI guys, I've read your advice and suggestions. You all

763
00:38:37,719 --> 00:38:40,000
Speaker 2: made some really good points, So I decided to talk

764
00:38:40,080 --> 00:38:42,560
Speaker 2: to my mom about it. I just needed her insights

765
00:38:42,560 --> 00:38:44,719
Speaker 2: about this matter. She told me that I should do

766
00:38:44,840 --> 00:38:47,239
Speaker 2: what I want to do. My boyfriend also encouraged me

767
00:38:47,320 --> 00:38:49,040
Speaker 2: to take the order. He said that if I had

768
00:38:49,080 --> 00:38:51,360
Speaker 2: to stay to organize the dessert table, he would be

769
00:38:51,400 --> 00:38:53,200
Speaker 2: there for me. I took the order, and it turns

770
00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:55,520
Speaker 2: out it was my ex husband's idea to hire me

771
00:38:55,680 --> 00:38:58,520
Speaker 2: because one of his colleagues recommended my services to him.

772
00:38:58,680 --> 00:39:02,640
Speaker 2: It was sort of notice, so I had to rush anyway.

773
00:39:02,719 --> 00:39:05,239
Speaker 2: I kept it strictly about business. I did take the

774
00:39:05,280 --> 00:39:07,560
Speaker 2: payment in advance, just like some of you mentioned, I

775
00:39:07,680 --> 00:39:11,239
Speaker 2: always ask for advanced payments. I mostly maintained communication through

776
00:39:11,320 --> 00:39:13,839
Speaker 2: email and had my assistant, who's also a family friend,

777
00:39:13,960 --> 00:39:17,479
Speaker 2: handle all communications. My ex best friend tried many times

778
00:39:17,520 --> 00:39:19,319
Speaker 2: to meet with me in person, but I just told

779
00:39:19,360 --> 00:39:21,920
Speaker 2: her to email me because I have cake orders for

780
00:39:22,000 --> 00:39:24,080
Speaker 2: other people too. I only had to meet her once

781
00:39:24,200 --> 00:39:26,479
Speaker 2: in person. Regarding the order. She sent me the party

782
00:39:26,560 --> 00:39:29,560
Speaker 2: details over email. Like I mentioned, it was a huge order.

783
00:39:29,760 --> 00:39:31,920
Speaker 2: I didn't just have to make a birthday cake for

784
00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:35,840
Speaker 2: the baby. It was Pokemon themed, but also cake pops, cupcakes,

785
00:39:35,920 --> 00:39:38,960
Speaker 2: and macaroon. Luckily, I had my friend Marie over for

786
00:39:39,080 --> 00:39:41,640
Speaker 2: some help. Yes I did pay her, so, like usual,

787
00:39:41,760 --> 00:39:43,719
Speaker 2: I went to deliver the cakes and other stuff for

788
00:39:43,800 --> 00:39:46,160
Speaker 2: the party. There was already a table set at the venue.

789
00:39:46,239 --> 00:39:48,800
Speaker 2: My boyfriend Josh thirty five mail came with me to

790
00:39:48,840 --> 00:39:51,120
Speaker 2: support me and keep me away from my ex husband

791
00:39:51,160 --> 00:39:53,400
Speaker 2: an ex best friend as much as possible. As I

792
00:39:53,640 --> 00:39:56,160
Speaker 2: was busy with myself, my ex approached me and said hello.

793
00:39:56,440 --> 00:39:59,360
Speaker 3: Not gonna lie. Seeing him after so many years, my

794
00:39:59,560 --> 00:40:00,760
Speaker 3: heart just stopped.

795
00:40:00,920 --> 00:40:03,560
Speaker 2: This man has given me the worst pain you could

796
00:40:03,680 --> 00:40:06,680
Speaker 2: possibly give to a human. I'm glad I held my composure.

797
00:40:07,040 --> 00:40:09,359
Speaker 2: I also said hello back. He tried to have small

798
00:40:09,400 --> 00:40:11,000
Speaker 2: talk with me by saying that he's sorry about how

799
00:40:11,080 --> 00:40:13,719
Speaker 2: things went down and what he said, and also that

800
00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:15,440
Speaker 2: I looked better than the last time he saw me.

801
00:40:15,760 --> 00:40:18,960
Speaker 3: Wow, okay really it's like, uh yeah, I'm like.

802
00:40:19,080 --> 00:40:22,440
Speaker 6: So, I'm like so sorry that I, you know, cheated

803
00:40:22,600 --> 00:40:25,400
Speaker 6: on you with your with your bestie and then like, uh,

804
00:40:25,800 --> 00:40:28,000
Speaker 6: stayed with her and now we have a freaking five

805
00:40:28,080 --> 00:40:30,760
Speaker 6: year old kid, and that you're at this kid's party.

806
00:40:30,840 --> 00:40:33,239
Speaker 3: I'm so sorry abou all that. But like, you're you

807
00:40:33,360 --> 00:40:34,440
Speaker 3: look pretty hot right now?

808
00:40:34,680 --> 00:40:38,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, you look hot at that blank stare right through him.

809
00:40:38,320 --> 00:40:39,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, do not talk to me about that. That is

810
00:40:39,960 --> 00:40:43,800
Speaker 3: so off liments, so inappropriate. Then he dropped a big bomb.

811
00:40:44,080 --> 00:40:47,320
Speaker 2: He said, all these years he thought of me, wondering

812
00:40:47,400 --> 00:40:49,759
Speaker 2: what I was doing, even though he's happy with his

813
00:40:49,960 --> 00:40:50,520
Speaker 2: married life.

814
00:40:50,600 --> 00:40:51,840
Speaker 3: But I was silent.

815
00:40:52,239 --> 00:40:55,080
Speaker 2: I didn't say a word. He just kept talking about

816
00:40:55,120 --> 00:40:57,879
Speaker 2: how he misses me and my cooking. My homemade french

817
00:40:57,880 --> 00:41:00,440
Speaker 2: onion soup is still his favorite. He misses it every

818
00:41:00,480 --> 00:41:03,279
Speaker 2: time he gets sick with the flu. I didn't know

819
00:41:03,480 --> 00:41:03,960
Speaker 2: what to say.

820
00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:06,560
Speaker 1: Straight up. The most devastating thing you could say right

821
00:41:06,560 --> 00:41:08,160
Speaker 1: there is you'd be like, do you have anything business

822
00:41:08,239 --> 00:41:09,279
Speaker 1: related you'd like to tell me?

823
00:41:09,680 --> 00:41:09,879
Speaker 3: Yeah?

824
00:41:10,040 --> 00:41:13,319
Speaker 1: It's like, okay, only business actually right, If you're all

825
00:41:13,400 --> 00:41:13,920
Speaker 1: good here.

826
00:41:13,840 --> 00:41:16,720
Speaker 3: Then I've done my job. I'm gonna head out. Thanks.

827
00:41:16,760 --> 00:41:19,080
Speaker 2: Why, Like, I'm sure there's a reason that she needs

828
00:41:19,120 --> 00:41:21,840
Speaker 2: to be there. She's not just there hanging out with

829
00:41:21,880 --> 00:41:24,040
Speaker 2: the desserts for fun, Like, but maybe you don't have

830
00:41:24,120 --> 00:41:26,360
Speaker 2: to finish that part of the job. I didn't know

831
00:41:26,520 --> 00:41:29,279
Speaker 2: what to say at that moment. Josh noticed that my

832
00:41:29,360 --> 00:41:32,000
Speaker 2: ex was making me uncomfortable and rushed towards me with

833
00:41:32,120 --> 00:41:34,279
Speaker 2: a fake emergency. He asked if I was okay, and

834
00:41:34,400 --> 00:41:36,680
Speaker 2: I said yes. After the table setting was done, I

835
00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:38,919
Speaker 2: was about to leave when I saw my ex father

836
00:41:39,000 --> 00:41:41,640
Speaker 2: in law along with other guests. He noticed me and

837
00:41:41,760 --> 00:41:43,640
Speaker 2: came to give me a hug. My ex father in

838
00:41:43,719 --> 00:41:46,440
Speaker 2: law is a very humble man. In fact, he was

839
00:41:46,520 --> 00:41:48,120
Speaker 2: the only one who was on my side when I

840
00:41:48,239 --> 00:41:49,680
Speaker 2: was going through the divorce with his son.

841
00:41:49,800 --> 00:41:50,120
Speaker 3: Oh wow.

842
00:41:50,239 --> 00:41:52,680
Speaker 2: He looked really happy to see me and ask me

843
00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:55,040
Speaker 2: how I was. He started chatting with me. I talked

844
00:41:55,040 --> 00:41:57,480
Speaker 2: to him about my business and he gave me some advice.

845
00:41:57,640 --> 00:42:00,800
Speaker 2: He even talked to my boyfriend, so he called Josh

846
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:04,279
Speaker 2: a pretty standard guy, whatever that means. Ex father in

847
00:42:04,360 --> 00:42:06,360
Speaker 2: law was nice and said that he would suggest my

848
00:42:06,400 --> 00:42:09,000
Speaker 2: services to his friends too. He insisted that I stay

849
00:42:09,040 --> 00:42:11,880
Speaker 2: into lunch was served. I said no couple of times,

850
00:42:11,960 --> 00:42:14,080
Speaker 2: but he managed to convince me. I only stayed for

851
00:42:14,160 --> 00:42:16,520
Speaker 2: one more hour or so, but I was fine. I

852
00:42:16,600 --> 00:42:18,480
Speaker 2: did notice that my ex best friend was eyeing me

853
00:42:18,600 --> 00:42:21,440
Speaker 2: from the corner. I was okay because Josh was beside

854
00:42:21,480 --> 00:42:23,680
Speaker 2: me the whole time. I chatted with some guests who

855
00:42:23,719 --> 00:42:26,480
Speaker 2: appreciated my service. I didn't have any more conversations with

856
00:42:26,600 --> 00:42:29,080
Speaker 2: my ex. I didn't even stay for the cake cutting.

857
00:42:29,320 --> 00:42:31,840
Speaker 2: I left the first chance I got, but my assistant

858
00:42:31,920 --> 00:42:34,000
Speaker 2: stayed to make sure that everything was fine and for

859
00:42:34,239 --> 00:42:37,239
Speaker 2: the cleanup. It was overwhelming for me. I saw some

860
00:42:37,360 --> 00:42:39,520
Speaker 2: of my old friends and my in laws. My mother

861
00:42:39,560 --> 00:42:42,279
Speaker 2: in law avoided me, and some of my old friends.

862
00:42:42,160 --> 00:42:42,759
Speaker 3: Just said hello.

863
00:42:43,040 --> 00:42:45,160
Speaker 2: Later that day, I got a message from my ex

864
00:42:45,200 --> 00:42:47,480
Speaker 2: best friend on my work email saying that she liked

865
00:42:47,600 --> 00:42:50,120
Speaker 2: my service and that her guests really liked my cakes

866
00:42:50,160 --> 00:42:50,680
Speaker 2: and desserts.

867
00:42:50,840 --> 00:42:54,440
Speaker 3: She also said sorry, that's not where it ends, though.

868
00:42:54,640 --> 00:42:57,239
Speaker 2: I got to know from my friend Marie, who was

869
00:42:57,280 --> 00:42:59,319
Speaker 2: still in contact with some of my old friend group,

870
00:42:59,440 --> 00:43:02,400
Speaker 2: that my ex best friend is not happy with her marriage.

871
00:43:02,560 --> 00:43:03,400
Speaker 3: When my ex and.

872
00:43:03,520 --> 00:43:06,279
Speaker 2: Her are in public, they often fight a lot. They

873
00:43:06,440 --> 00:43:09,040
Speaker 2: also fought on that day of their kids' birthday. To

874
00:43:09,160 --> 00:43:11,480
Speaker 2: be honest, I just told Marie not to bring me

875
00:43:11,560 --> 00:43:13,319
Speaker 2: the gossip about her. There is a little bit more

876
00:43:13,360 --> 00:43:16,160
Speaker 2: to the story, but interesting development.

877
00:43:16,280 --> 00:43:19,480
Speaker 1: To take every ounce of wheel power within me to

878
00:43:19,600 --> 00:43:22,960
Speaker 1: not go, oh, that's interesting. It's just like here, yeah,

879
00:43:23,960 --> 00:43:27,520
Speaker 1: you have you're having problems with your marriage. Try maybe

880
00:43:27,560 --> 00:43:29,759
Speaker 1: I'll give you my French onion super recipe. He told

881
00:43:29,800 --> 00:43:34,759
Speaker 1: me at your wedding that yeah, yeah, literally, and then

882
00:43:34,840 --> 00:43:37,480
Speaker 1: I would just ever talk to either of them ever. Again.

883
00:43:37,760 --> 00:43:41,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, just don't, dude, don't, don't take parties from these people. Literally,

884
00:43:42,280 --> 00:43:46,520
Speaker 2: this was your ex husband's idea to hire you, claiming

885
00:43:46,560 --> 00:43:51,560
Speaker 2: that a friend recommended your services, when really he was like,

886
00:43:51,680 --> 00:43:54,920
Speaker 2: oh great, I can tell her how freaking smokin' she looks,

887
00:43:55,160 --> 00:43:57,239
Speaker 2: how much more smoking she looks than back then.

888
00:43:57,320 --> 00:43:59,520
Speaker 3: Maybe if she looks this smoking, I wouldn't have cheated

889
00:43:59,600 --> 00:44:05,120
Speaker 3: on her her friend. That's crazy, just craziness, craziness.

890
00:44:05,239 --> 00:44:07,319
Speaker 2: But there is a little bit more to this craziness.

891
00:44:07,800 --> 00:44:11,200
Speaker 2: But the silver lining is I got a huge fat check.

892
00:44:11,680 --> 00:44:13,080
Speaker 3: I can finally buy.

893
00:44:12,960 --> 00:44:15,840
Speaker 2: Any sugar printer or maybe a good quality of it. Also,

894
00:44:16,000 --> 00:44:18,400
Speaker 2: I just want to appreciate my boyfriend Josh. He has

895
00:44:18,440 --> 00:44:21,040
Speaker 2: been incredibly supportive of me. He protected me from my

896
00:44:21,120 --> 00:44:23,719
Speaker 2: ex and ex best friend like a night. I think

897
00:44:23,760 --> 00:44:25,000
Speaker 2: he deserves his own.

898
00:44:24,880 --> 00:44:26,759
Speaker 3: Cake from me. And I know a lot of you

899
00:44:26,880 --> 00:44:28,799
Speaker 3: told me not to take it, but I guess I'm

900
00:44:28,880 --> 00:44:29,120
Speaker 3: just a.

901
00:44:29,160 --> 00:44:31,799
Speaker 2: Greedy mister Crabs who cares more about the money rather

902
00:44:31,920 --> 00:44:33,600
Speaker 2: than being a classy.

903
00:44:33,280 --> 00:44:36,440
Speaker 4: Ha ha ha Okay, when it's that much money, I

904
00:44:36,480 --> 00:44:38,839
Speaker 4: thought it was like a couple hundred bucks. This kind

905
00:44:38,840 --> 00:44:39,560
Speaker 4: of changes thing.

906
00:44:39,719 --> 00:44:42,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean it sounds like it's baking all of

907
00:44:42,719 --> 00:44:44,960
Speaker 2: that stuff and then also being there to set up

908
00:44:45,000 --> 00:44:45,680
Speaker 2: and take down.

909
00:44:45,840 --> 00:44:48,200
Speaker 3: That's I feel like. Usually not a part of the thing.

910
00:44:48,360 --> 00:44:50,680
Speaker 3: Usually you just like send the order, you know, and.

911
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:53,120
Speaker 1: It's clearly elite. Yeah, everyone's like, oh.

912
00:44:56,719 --> 00:45:00,520
Speaker 2: Right, so yeah, it's probably expensive. But this is the

913
00:45:00,640 --> 00:45:03,120
Speaker 2: last time I will be taking any orders from them.

914
00:45:03,360 --> 00:45:05,200
Speaker 2: I know they have a three year old daughter whose

915
00:45:05,239 --> 00:45:07,120
Speaker 2: birthday will be in two months. I think they might

916
00:45:07,200 --> 00:45:09,320
Speaker 2: try to hire me again. I will not take it

917
00:45:09,480 --> 00:45:12,279
Speaker 2: if that happens. And ps, Yes, my ex best friend

918
00:45:12,360 --> 00:45:14,279
Speaker 2: did try to communicate with me during the party, but

919
00:45:14,400 --> 00:45:16,840
Speaker 2: I managed to avoid it thanks to Josh and my

920
00:45:16,960 --> 00:45:19,200
Speaker 2: ex father in law. My ex father in law knows

921
00:45:19,239 --> 00:45:21,839
Speaker 2: about my situation and my discomfort with my ex best friend.

922
00:45:21,920 --> 00:45:24,440
Speaker 2: He kept me busy with small talk. There are some comments.

923
00:45:24,520 --> 00:45:27,080
Speaker 2: Comment number one says, by this sugar printer or the oven,

924
00:45:27,160 --> 00:45:29,439
Speaker 2: but also take your boyfriend out to say thanks.

925
00:45:29,600 --> 00:45:31,759
Speaker 3: He sounds like a great guy. Ope, he says, we

926
00:45:31,920 --> 00:45:34,239
Speaker 3: will sometime next weekend. I don't know.

927
00:45:34,320 --> 00:45:38,440
Speaker 2: I'm wondering about the reason ex's conversation came up about

928
00:45:38,480 --> 00:45:41,200
Speaker 2: old time. Sounds like his marriage isn't going so well.

929
00:45:41,440 --> 00:45:43,680
Speaker 2: Is he trying to make his wife jealous? I'm happy

930
00:45:43,880 --> 00:45:46,920
Speaker 2: your service was professionally done. However, next time, I think

931
00:45:47,120 --> 00:45:49,080
Speaker 2: I would just be too busy to take the order.

932
00:45:49,200 --> 00:45:52,840
Speaker 2: Your boyfriend sounds like a keeper all the best, someone responds,

933
00:45:53,040 --> 00:45:54,719
Speaker 2: or the ex might be trying to feel out the

934
00:45:54,760 --> 00:45:56,600
Speaker 2: situation to see if he has a chance of getting

935
00:45:56,640 --> 00:45:57,120
Speaker 2: back together.

936
00:45:57,360 --> 00:45:59,440
Speaker 3: Good thing boyfriend was there. Yeah, that's definitely what was

937
00:45:59,440 --> 00:45:59,640
Speaker 3: going on.

938
00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:02,400
Speaker 1: Listen to any of these comments, being like, I wouldn't

939
00:46:02,400 --> 00:46:07,640
Speaker 1: have done it. It's like, hello, getching money literally money literally,

940
00:46:07,800 --> 00:46:09,279
Speaker 1: and it's like the best thing you could do in

941
00:46:09,360 --> 00:46:13,120
Speaker 1: this situation is show up, be unbothered, and take the

942
00:46:13,239 --> 00:46:15,640
Speaker 1: money away from the people who betrayed you.

943
00:46:15,960 --> 00:46:16,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, how many?

944
00:46:16,600 --> 00:46:18,840
Speaker 2: Number three says money is great, but it sounds like

945
00:46:18,880 --> 00:46:20,879
Speaker 2: so much emotional effort to get to get it from

946
00:46:20,920 --> 00:46:24,279
Speaker 2: these customers. Well yeah whatever, Oh he doesn't respond to that. Yeah,

947
00:46:24,440 --> 00:46:27,640
Speaker 2: it's up to her if that's emotional. Yeah, like it's

948
00:46:27,880 --> 00:46:28,960
Speaker 2: if that's too much emotional.

949
00:46:29,080 --> 00:46:31,680
Speaker 1: If this is giving you conniptions, then yeah, don't do it.

950
00:46:32,040 --> 00:46:34,440
Speaker 1: If you can just go, do I get you need anything?

951
00:46:34,440 --> 00:46:35,200
Speaker 3: Else exactly.

952
00:46:35,440 --> 00:46:39,440
Speaker 1: Then that's if you can do your retail food industry,

953
00:46:39,719 --> 00:46:40,640
Speaker 1: service industry.

954
00:46:40,880 --> 00:46:45,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, right, is that all? And that's the end of

955
00:46:45,440 --> 00:46:47,120
Speaker 3: the story. We're going to go on to the next one.

956
00:46:48,160 --> 00:46:50,120
Speaker 1: Hey, y'all, it's John Ogi host here. We're gonna get

957
00:46:50,120 --> 00:46:51,640
Speaker 1: back to the stories. But here's a quick three minute

958
00:46:51,680 --> 00:46:54,400
Speaker 1: break from as for more sponsors. My best friend's sister

959
00:46:54,719 --> 00:46:58,480
Speaker 1: planned to ruin her wedding, but I managed to stop it,

960
00:46:59,280 --> 00:47:03,160
Speaker 1: stop the ruining of the wedding. I forty two female

961
00:47:03,200 --> 00:47:07,440
Speaker 1: attended my bestie Anna's wedding this summer. She and her

962
00:47:07,520 --> 00:47:10,080
Speaker 1: new hobby have been together almost a decade and decided

963
00:47:10,120 --> 00:47:12,479
Speaker 1: to get married a little over a year ago. There's

964
00:47:12,520 --> 00:47:15,120
Speaker 1: a lot of drama in Anna's family just by nature.

965
00:47:15,280 --> 00:47:17,200
Speaker 1: She knows it, I know it, we all know it.

966
00:47:17,360 --> 00:47:19,080
Speaker 1: And by the way, we're all going to know that.

967
00:47:19,200 --> 00:47:22,000
Speaker 1: This comes from user one field five two three four

968
00:47:22,120 --> 00:47:24,960
Speaker 1: on the r slash chard at Dobra YouTube subreddit. If

969
00:47:25,000 --> 00:47:26,800
Speaker 1: you want to submit your own stories, go to the

970
00:47:26,920 --> 00:47:30,240
Speaker 1: r slash Okay storytime subreddit. I'm Dakota and I'm Angie.

971
00:47:30,440 --> 00:47:36,680
Speaker 1: I'm Sophia, I'm Sofia, says Riley. I'm Riley and oh

972
00:47:36,880 --> 00:47:40,359
Speaker 1: pee for context. Anna and I have been friends since

973
00:47:40,400 --> 00:47:42,759
Speaker 1: two thousand and six, in our mid twenties, when we

974
00:47:42,920 --> 00:47:46,040
Speaker 1: met in a popular vacation town and immediately decided we

975
00:47:46,080 --> 00:47:49,920
Speaker 1: would be best friends. Allah meeting a kindergarten bestie, you know,

976
00:47:50,000 --> 00:47:52,160
Speaker 1: when you spot each other and immediately are like, I'll

977
00:47:52,239 --> 00:47:55,920
Speaker 1: take that one. Yeah. We live about one thousand miles apart,

978
00:47:56,040 --> 00:47:58,680
Speaker 1: though because of this, I haven't actually met the majority

979
00:47:58,719 --> 00:48:01,440
Speaker 1: of her family. I've met her parents, her partner, and

980
00:48:01,640 --> 00:48:05,800
Speaker 1: her now stepdaughter, but never her sister Marie. Until the wedding.

981
00:48:05,880 --> 00:48:08,279
Speaker 1: About six months ago, Anna told me she wanted me

982
00:48:08,360 --> 00:48:11,400
Speaker 1: to be her matron of honor, but she couldn't because

983
00:48:11,640 --> 00:48:14,600
Speaker 1: Marie was going to have a fit if it wasn't her.

984
00:48:14,800 --> 00:48:17,239
Speaker 1: She didn't want Marie to stand up with her or

985
00:48:17,320 --> 00:48:21,000
Speaker 1: control anything wedding related. She and her fiance decided the

986
00:48:21,120 --> 00:48:23,520
Speaker 1: only person who would be standing up with them was

987
00:48:23,600 --> 00:48:26,399
Speaker 1: his daughter, her stepdaughter to be. I was completely fine

988
00:48:26,400 --> 00:48:28,520
Speaker 1: with this. I'm not big on attention, and the last

989
00:48:28,680 --> 00:48:31,000
Speaker 1: two weddings I've been in I was part of a

990
00:48:31,120 --> 00:48:34,480
Speaker 1: massive bridal party, so I could fade into the background

991
00:48:34,520 --> 00:48:36,560
Speaker 1: a bit. I was more than happy just being there

992
00:48:36,600 --> 00:48:39,319
Speaker 1: to help on her wedding day, no labels needed. Well,

993
00:48:39,480 --> 00:48:42,360
Speaker 1: the week arrived, I flew in about a week early

994
00:48:42,440 --> 00:48:45,840
Speaker 1: and met the other not bridesmaid. First thing. We immediately

995
00:48:45,920 --> 00:48:49,920
Speaker 1: bonded over the anti Marie dialogue that ensued. Here is

996
00:48:50,000 --> 00:48:55,520
Speaker 1: some context. Marie is high maintenance, like every holiday, family event, vacation,

997
00:48:55,800 --> 00:48:58,640
Speaker 1: et cetera, has to be catered to her. She's the

998
00:48:58,719 --> 00:49:01,960
Speaker 1: younger of the two, and if Anna gets even a

999
00:49:02,040 --> 00:49:04,480
Speaker 1: shred of attention, that should be devoted to her. The

1000
00:49:04,640 --> 00:49:09,520
Speaker 1: tantrum is legendary, like goes no contact on other people's

1001
00:49:09,560 --> 00:49:13,040
Speaker 1: birthdays because she can't acknowledge that it's not her day

1002
00:49:13,640 --> 00:49:16,360
Speaker 1: level tantrum. She's just a little child.

1003
00:49:16,520 --> 00:49:18,280
Speaker 3: That's a little baby bride and Jesus.

1004
00:49:18,200 --> 00:49:20,920
Speaker 1: A child saying oh mommy, mommy, mommy, No, it has

1005
00:49:21,000 --> 00:49:21,600
Speaker 1: to be about me.

1006
00:49:21,880 --> 00:49:24,319
Speaker 3: It has to be about me, Mommy, my day.

1007
00:49:24,600 --> 00:49:29,719
Speaker 1: Mummy, No, mummy, it's like you're thirty five. So we

1008
00:49:29,840 --> 00:49:32,640
Speaker 1: all knew what was coming if she showed up, which

1009
00:49:32,680 --> 00:49:36,040
Speaker 1: we didn't actually know would happened until she physically walked

1010
00:49:36,080 --> 00:49:38,080
Speaker 1: into the venue. She managed to get into town a

1011
00:49:38,160 --> 00:49:40,400
Speaker 1: day early and came to the pre wedding barbecue. The

1012
00:49:40,440 --> 00:49:43,320
Speaker 1: bride and groom we're hosting. That's where it started.

1013
00:49:43,400 --> 00:49:44,160
Speaker 3: Dun dunt all.

1014
00:49:46,239 --> 00:49:48,840
Speaker 1: She had far too much to drink and then started

1015
00:49:48,920 --> 00:49:52,120
Speaker 1: crying about how Anna quote never wanted her here and

1016
00:49:52,320 --> 00:49:54,600
Speaker 1: was making sure she knew it. For the record, I

1017
00:49:54,920 --> 00:49:57,960
Speaker 1: was with Anna and Marie all day and Anna did

1018
00:49:58,120 --> 00:50:01,400
Speaker 1: nothing to her that would have even suggested this. She

1019
00:50:01,480 --> 00:50:05,200
Speaker 1: had been friendly, kind and accommodating, despite the barbes she

1020
00:50:05,320 --> 00:50:08,000
Speaker 1: was getting about her complexion and hair that day. She is,

1021
00:50:08,080 --> 00:50:10,680
Speaker 1: of course beautiful, but whatever. Then in the middle of

1022
00:50:10,719 --> 00:50:13,440
Speaker 1: the party, she started sobbing and stormed off. It took

1023
00:50:13,480 --> 00:50:15,959
Speaker 1: half the attendees two hours to find her, hiding under

1024
00:50:16,000 --> 00:50:18,680
Speaker 1: the desk. It's elevated. She wasn't like in a crawl

1025
00:50:18,719 --> 00:50:21,640
Speaker 1: space where she could hear us looking everywhere for her.

1026
00:50:21,719 --> 00:50:24,040
Speaker 1: People even got in their cars to drive down the

1027
00:50:24,200 --> 00:50:27,640
Speaker 1: darkening winding road make sure she wasn't wandering into traffic.

1028
00:50:27,760 --> 00:50:30,640
Speaker 1: Then the wedding day came. The first red flag was

1029
00:50:30,840 --> 00:50:33,440
Speaker 1: Marie needing to get her hair done. Anna arranged for

1030
00:50:33,560 --> 00:50:36,520
Speaker 1: her to have a last minute appointment with them, Anna

1031
00:50:36,840 --> 00:50:39,879
Speaker 1: at their mom and Anna's stepdaughter, and Marie made them

1032
00:50:39,960 --> 00:50:42,120
Speaker 1: so late that Anna had to do her own makeup.

1033
00:50:42,200 --> 00:50:44,800
Speaker 1: This wasn't that big of a deal. Originally, Marie was

1034
00:50:44,880 --> 00:50:47,480
Speaker 1: going to do it since she's a MUA, which I

1035
00:50:47,520 --> 00:50:49,359
Speaker 1: hadn't known at the time, and now I can only

1036
00:50:49,440 --> 00:50:52,520
Speaker 1: imagine how that would have gone. More importantly, they showed

1037
00:50:52,600 --> 00:50:55,120
Speaker 1: up at the venue with Marie still in her casual clothes.

1038
00:50:55,239 --> 00:50:57,640
Speaker 1: I was already at the venue. I was responsible for

1039
00:50:57,680 --> 00:51:00,320
Speaker 1: setting up the place settings, favors, and centerpieces. It was

1040
00:51:00,440 --> 00:51:03,400
Speaker 1: me and the other not bridesmaid running around putting stuff

1041
00:51:03,440 --> 00:51:07,000
Speaker 1: together while the event planner, Anna worked with handled the vendors.

1042
00:51:07,120 --> 00:51:09,160
Speaker 1: When Marie asked what she could do, we gave her

1043
00:51:09,239 --> 00:51:11,879
Speaker 1: tasks and then secretly went to other people and gave

1044
00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:14,839
Speaker 1: them to them as well, with the instruction to wait

1045
00:51:14,840 --> 00:51:17,040
Speaker 1: a few minutes to see if Marie actually did it.

1046
00:51:17,200 --> 00:51:19,960
Speaker 1: She never once did the task we gave her. Fine,

1047
00:51:20,080 --> 00:51:22,960
Speaker 1: We planned for that. As the time approached, we all

1048
00:51:23,000 --> 00:51:25,920
Speaker 1: started to filter out to get dressed. Marie vanished. She

1049
00:51:26,080 --> 00:51:28,720
Speaker 1: was gone for almost an hour. The ceremony was supposed

1050
00:51:28,719 --> 00:51:30,680
Speaker 1: to start at two thirty. At one point thirty, there

1051
00:51:30,760 --> 00:51:33,239
Speaker 1: was a call for formal photos for the family of

1052
00:51:33,320 --> 00:51:36,200
Speaker 1: the bride and groom. Marie was not there. She showed

1053
00:51:36,280 --> 00:51:39,920
Speaker 1: up minutes before two in a white dress with small

1054
00:51:40,000 --> 00:51:42,880
Speaker 1: lemons on it. The wedding was Tiki themed. The colors

1055
00:51:42,880 --> 00:51:46,320
Speaker 1: were bright orange and bright green. Everyone was asked to

1056
00:51:46,440 --> 00:51:49,600
Speaker 1: dress in their best tiki party garb. All around us

1057
00:51:49,640 --> 00:51:53,000
Speaker 1: were people dressed in bright vacation clothes, Hawaiian shirts, and

1058
00:51:53,080 --> 00:51:56,200
Speaker 1: flowy dresses everywhere. The bride was wearing a pin Up

1059
00:51:56,239 --> 00:51:59,439
Speaker 1: inspired white dress with lace sleeves, and Marie was wearing

1060
00:51:59,520 --> 00:52:02,600
Speaker 1: a pin Up inspired white dress with tiny lemons on it.

1061
00:52:02,800 --> 00:52:05,760
Speaker 2: You don't wear a white dress to a wedding unless

1062
00:52:05,760 --> 00:52:06,520
Speaker 2: it's yours.

1063
00:52:07,000 --> 00:52:09,800
Speaker 1: Marie is not allowed into his venue.

1064
00:52:10,080 --> 00:52:12,240
Speaker 2: It's just like, I don't know why we keep getting

1065
00:52:12,320 --> 00:52:15,080
Speaker 2: so many stories where people don't know that rule.

1066
00:52:15,320 --> 00:52:16,040
Speaker 3: What's that about.

1067
00:52:16,400 --> 00:52:19,040
Speaker 1: I'm not like I don't even know you know, red

1068
00:52:19,080 --> 00:52:23,440
Speaker 1: wine's getting on that dress immediately. It's just it like,

1069
00:52:23,600 --> 00:52:25,920
Speaker 1: I won't even I'm not even gonna hide it. I'm

1070
00:52:25,960 --> 00:52:27,960
Speaker 1: gonna walk right up to her with the red wine.

1071
00:52:27,960 --> 00:52:32,279
Speaker 1: I'm not Ope, I'm Opie's friend. Okay, gotcha Ope's ride

1072
00:52:32,480 --> 00:52:35,800
Speaker 1: or un alive. You walk up to her sister with

1073
00:52:35,920 --> 00:52:37,840
Speaker 1: the red You just look at her with a glass

1074
00:52:37,880 --> 00:52:40,560
Speaker 1: of red wine in your hand, and you go splash.

1075
00:52:40,239 --> 00:52:43,720
Speaker 3: Oh oh Oops, I tripped standing completely.

1076
00:52:43,440 --> 00:52:46,000
Speaker 1: So looks like you have to wear something else, Marie.

1077
00:52:47,040 --> 00:52:47,239
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1078
00:52:47,680 --> 00:52:50,480
Speaker 1: From then on it was a series of things. She

1079
00:52:50,640 --> 00:52:53,560
Speaker 1: tried to change the playlist from the one Anna had curated.

1080
00:52:53,719 --> 00:52:55,759
Speaker 1: When she couldn't change it, she tried to get the

1081
00:52:55,840 --> 00:52:58,520
Speaker 1: bartenders to let her behind the bar to add music

1082
00:52:58,719 --> 00:53:02,240
Speaker 1: she wanted to draw all over the newly restored nineteen

1083
00:53:02,320 --> 00:53:06,400
Speaker 1: sixty nine Morris Minor one thousand Traveler that Anna and

1084
00:53:06,520 --> 00:53:08,960
Speaker 1: her husband have spent over a year working on. This

1085
00:53:09,120 --> 00:53:12,640
Speaker 1: has been blatantly shut down already before the wedding. Immediately

1086
00:53:12,760 --> 00:53:15,839
Speaker 1: after the father daughter dance, she privately threw a fit

1087
00:53:15,960 --> 00:53:18,280
Speaker 1: to their dad that Anna got a dance and she didn't,

1088
00:53:18,360 --> 00:53:20,839
Speaker 1: maybe because she's literally the bride. She tried to take

1089
00:53:21,000 --> 00:53:25,040
Speaker 1: the MC's microphone three separate times without any reason. There

1090
00:53:25,080 --> 00:53:28,120
Speaker 1: were no speeches requested by the bride and groom, literally

1091
00:53:28,600 --> 00:53:31,759
Speaker 1: because of her. Every single time she was thwarted by

1092
00:53:31,880 --> 00:53:34,120
Speaker 1: me or the other not bridesmaid. At the end of

1093
00:53:34,160 --> 00:53:36,080
Speaker 1: the wedding, Marie came up to me and thanked me

1094
00:53:36,200 --> 00:53:38,719
Speaker 1: for being a better sister to Anna than she ever had.

1095
00:53:38,920 --> 00:53:41,600
Speaker 1: And you know what, I said, You're welcome. I know

1096
00:53:41,719 --> 00:53:43,839
Speaker 1: she was expecting me to coddle her and tell her

1097
00:53:43,920 --> 00:53:46,640
Speaker 1: she was a wait sister and that Anna loves her.

1098
00:53:46,920 --> 00:53:48,879
Speaker 1: But you know what, I had lied enough that day

1099
00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:51,000
Speaker 1: by saying she was welcome at the wedding. And that's

1100
00:53:51,040 --> 00:53:53,799
Speaker 1: how I made sure my bestie had the best wedding

1101
00:53:53,880 --> 00:53:56,280
Speaker 1: she could possibly have come. Unber one, even the parents

1102
00:53:56,360 --> 00:53:58,400
Speaker 1: seem normal. How did the sister end up with so

1103
00:53:58,520 --> 00:54:02,200
Speaker 1: much main character energy? People just baffle me? Oh, P replies,

1104
00:54:02,280 --> 00:54:04,600
Speaker 1: Oh no, no, I left it out for character count.

1105
00:54:04,680 --> 00:54:07,320
Speaker 1: But their mom is just as awful. She spent the

1106
00:54:07,360 --> 00:54:09,440
Speaker 1: whole week complaining that nothing at the wedding was what

1107
00:54:09,640 --> 00:54:12,520
Speaker 1: she wanted. Will never I will never understand that. It's

1108
00:54:12,600 --> 00:54:14,759
Speaker 1: now your wedding, dude, Yeah, now your wedding. It's your

1109
00:54:14,920 --> 00:54:18,160
Speaker 1: daughter's wedding. Yeah, not yours. Come on, girl, you already

1110
00:54:18,200 --> 00:54:21,280
Speaker 1: had yours. Chill out, What are you talking about?

1111
00:54:22,600 --> 00:54:24,040
Speaker 3: That's all that's all it is.

1112
00:54:24,320 --> 00:54:27,000
Speaker 1: You get that one, You get divorced to get me married.

1113
00:54:27,000 --> 00:54:28,560
Speaker 1: You get to take a one. Yeah, are you the

1114
00:54:28,600 --> 00:54:30,640
Speaker 1: one marrying your daughter's husband?

1115
00:54:30,920 --> 00:54:30,960
Speaker 5: No?

1116
00:54:31,360 --> 00:54:32,839
Speaker 3: No, you shut your mouth.

1117
00:54:34,440 --> 00:54:37,560
Speaker 1: Tom and ever too. What was done about Marie's white dress? Oh,

1118
00:54:37,640 --> 00:54:41,239
Speaker 1: he says, Unfortunately nothing. I went to Anna to check in,

1119
00:54:41,400 --> 00:54:43,760
Speaker 1: and she was like, what color would you say Marie's dresses?

1120
00:54:43,920 --> 00:54:47,040
Speaker 1: She was super chill and calm. I told her I understood,

1121
00:54:47,120 --> 00:54:49,120
Speaker 1: and we would do something if she needed to or

1122
00:54:49,360 --> 00:54:51,759
Speaker 1: if she needed us to. Earlier that week, the other

1123
00:54:51,920 --> 00:54:54,880
Speaker 1: not bridesmaid and I had already discussed having her removed

1124
00:54:54,920 --> 00:54:58,439
Speaker 1: if needed, but my bestie gave true main character energy

1125
00:54:58,520 --> 00:55:01,239
Speaker 1: and said, don't worry about it. She doesn't matter, So

1126
00:55:01,400 --> 00:55:04,279
Speaker 1: we left it alone. Everyone there knew Anna, and no

1127
00:55:04,400 --> 00:55:06,840
Speaker 1: one had met Marie, so it was a non issue.

1128
00:55:07,000 --> 00:55:10,839
Speaker 1: I suspect it really bugged Marie that no one mentioned it. Reply,

1129
00:55:11,239 --> 00:55:14,719
Speaker 1: she can have the photographer change the color. Puce is good,

1130
00:55:14,880 --> 00:55:16,719
Speaker 1: not like a mixture between puke and chartruse.

1131
00:55:16,760 --> 00:55:18,239
Speaker 3: Yeah, can you look at what pisces?

1132
00:55:18,719 --> 00:55:22,360
Speaker 4: Yes, I forget a dark red or purple brown color.

1133
00:55:22,560 --> 00:55:24,319
Speaker 4: A dark red or purple brown color.

1134
00:55:24,440 --> 00:55:27,200
Speaker 3: Nice down, but it's not a theme of the wedding.

1135
00:55:27,360 --> 00:55:28,759
Speaker 3: But not to still a good color.

1136
00:55:28,840 --> 00:55:32,080
Speaker 1: Comment three, I so wanted you to accidentally spill red

1137
00:55:32,120 --> 00:55:34,520
Speaker 1: wine on it, Op said we would have if there

1138
00:55:34,600 --> 00:55:36,840
Speaker 1: was wine. It was at a brewery and legally they

1139
00:55:36,880 --> 00:55:43,239
Speaker 1: could only sell their own drinks and zero percent alchamchall beverages,

1140
00:55:43,840 --> 00:55:46,200
Speaker 1: so nothing was dark enough to make a difference. Comment

1141
00:55:46,280 --> 00:55:48,920
Speaker 1: number four. I never understood why people give in to

1142
00:55:49,080 --> 00:55:52,120
Speaker 1: attention seeking behavior, as in Marie wandered away and the

1143
00:55:52,200 --> 00:55:54,880
Speaker 1: world stopped to find her. If everyone just carried on,

1144
00:55:55,080 --> 00:55:57,640
Speaker 1: she would have become bored and re emerged, Yes, probably

1145
00:55:57,680 --> 00:56:00,480
Speaker 1: screaming and crying that nobody cared. However, if that did

1146
00:56:00,560 --> 00:56:02,880
Speaker 1: not get a reaction, I'm guessing Marie would stop with

1147
00:56:02,960 --> 00:56:05,560
Speaker 1: the theatrics. Let her scream and pout. As I told

1148
00:56:05,600 --> 00:56:08,440
Speaker 1: my children when they were young, I understand you are

1149
00:56:08,560 --> 00:56:11,640
Speaker 1: upset and need to cry. That is fine. Please take

1150
00:56:11,719 --> 00:56:14,319
Speaker 1: care of that in your bedroom. I'm happy to talk

1151
00:56:14,360 --> 00:56:17,040
Speaker 1: to you once you get it out of your system. Really,

1152
00:56:17,200 --> 00:56:19,840
Speaker 1: sometimes we do need to just cry, but we do

1153
00:56:20,000 --> 00:56:22,000
Speaker 1: not need to be the center of attention. That's a

1154
00:56:22,120 --> 00:56:26,279
Speaker 1: Marie issue that others are enabling. Opie says. The only

1155
00:56:26,360 --> 00:56:29,280
Speaker 1: people who search for her were the bride's family because

1156
00:56:29,480 --> 00:56:31,840
Speaker 1: they're used to doing it. The rest of us were like,

1157
00:56:32,239 --> 00:56:35,320
Speaker 1: that sucks. Pass me at Frank and there's an update?

1158
00:56:35,760 --> 00:56:39,040
Speaker 3: Oh what even is there to say left in this story?

1159
00:56:39,280 --> 00:56:42,440
Speaker 3: The winning happened? Is she causing just more trouble?

1160
00:56:42,480 --> 00:56:44,040
Speaker 1: I don't know. I just think I think there needs

1161
00:56:44,080 --> 00:56:46,719
Speaker 1: to be some level of like intervention.

1162
00:56:47,239 --> 00:56:47,439
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1163
00:56:47,600 --> 00:56:50,640
Speaker 1: If this is how Marie is, it's like she needs therapy,

1164
00:56:50,719 --> 00:56:53,680
Speaker 1: she needs something like are you okay? She is unwell?

1165
00:56:53,760 --> 00:56:58,440
Speaker 1: She's clearly not. She's clearly not. She's never okay. She

1166
00:56:58,600 --> 00:57:00,799
Speaker 1: makes that very clear all the time.

1167
00:57:01,120 --> 00:57:02,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, so let's get into this update.

1168
00:57:03,040 --> 00:57:06,440
Speaker 1: So let's get into Anna's family a bit. Anna is

1169
00:57:06,640 --> 00:57:09,080
Speaker 1: in her mid forties and she's been in a long

1170
00:57:09,160 --> 00:57:12,240
Speaker 1: term relationship for all of her twenties that was toxic.

1171
00:57:12,400 --> 00:57:15,840
Speaker 1: After she and her ex split, he really grew into herself.

1172
00:57:16,000 --> 00:57:20,880
Speaker 1: She is this vivacious, opinionated, amazing woman who honestly couldn't

1173
00:57:20,880 --> 00:57:23,240
Speaker 1: give a flying f what people think about her. And

1174
00:57:23,480 --> 00:57:26,840
Speaker 1: I love that her partner now husband, Ted is an

1175
00:57:26,840 --> 00:57:30,560
Speaker 1: amazing dude, as most Ted's are. They're both giant nerds

1176
00:57:30,600 --> 00:57:33,440
Speaker 1: with niche tastes and once they claim you, there is

1177
00:57:33,560 --> 00:57:36,800
Speaker 1: no escape. That all being said, Anna and Marie's mom

1178
00:57:37,160 --> 00:57:40,640
Speaker 1: Tory is a lot right ro I love the woman,

1179
00:57:40,840 --> 00:57:44,960
Speaker 1: trust me, but she's never wrong regardless of who's actually right.

1180
00:57:45,160 --> 00:57:48,360
Speaker 1: She is tiny and loud. From the moment Anna and

1181
00:57:48,480 --> 00:57:51,680
Speaker 1: Ted got engaged, it's been all about how long She's

1182
00:57:51,760 --> 00:57:55,040
Speaker 1: waited for this, so obviously it was going to go badly.

1183
00:57:55,200 --> 00:57:57,400
Speaker 1: As I mentioned in my other post, Anna and I

1184
00:57:57,560 --> 00:58:00,800
Speaker 1: live about a thousand miles apart. I also have a kid,

1185
00:58:01,240 --> 00:58:04,560
Speaker 1: multiple health issues, and a complicated job, so getting together

1186
00:58:04,680 --> 00:58:07,200
Speaker 1: has been a struggle. Years ago, I traveled for work

1187
00:58:07,240 --> 00:58:09,240
Speaker 1: and I got to see Anna probably once a month,

1188
00:58:09,360 --> 00:58:12,160
Speaker 1: but since twenty to twenty that has stopped. I've seen

1189
00:58:12,200 --> 00:58:14,800
Speaker 1: her twice in five years, with the most recent trip

1190
00:58:14,880 --> 00:58:17,360
Speaker 1: before the wedding being in twenty twenty three. Her mother

1191
00:58:17,480 --> 00:58:20,880
Speaker 1: lives about seven hours drive from her and visits regularly.

1192
00:58:21,120 --> 00:58:23,960
Speaker 1: When we were planning my trip up, Anna asked me

1193
00:58:24,080 --> 00:58:26,040
Speaker 1: if I could come up early and stay with her.

1194
00:58:26,120 --> 00:58:28,440
Speaker 1: She wanted to catch up before the wedding stuff happened,

1195
00:58:28,560 --> 00:58:30,440
Speaker 1: and I wanted to help where I could, so I

1196
00:58:30,520 --> 00:58:32,440
Speaker 1: flew up a week early to spend time with her.

1197
00:58:32,560 --> 00:58:34,760
Speaker 1: Tory had been at her house about a month before

1198
00:58:34,840 --> 00:58:37,560
Speaker 1: the two weeks. During that time, she tried to force

1199
00:58:37,600 --> 00:58:40,480
Speaker 1: Anna into a seating chart it was open seating at

1200
00:58:40,520 --> 00:58:43,320
Speaker 1: the reception, and talk her out of her catering choice.

1201
00:58:43,480 --> 00:58:45,760
Speaker 1: She also complained about not getting to go to Anna's

1202
00:58:45,800 --> 00:58:48,920
Speaker 1: hair test because she wanted to give the hairdresser some pointers. Hey,

1203
00:58:49,280 --> 00:58:50,240
Speaker 1: that's necessary?

1204
00:58:50,440 --> 00:58:50,640
Speaker 2: Eh?

1205
00:58:51,000 --> 00:58:52,600
Speaker 1: Thanks, Mom, You're not needed here.

1206
00:58:53,080 --> 00:58:55,200
Speaker 3: This is a professional that we've got work in here.

1207
00:58:55,600 --> 00:58:56,280
Speaker 3: Don't worry about it.

1208
00:58:56,360 --> 00:58:59,200
Speaker 1: When I arrived on Monday, I immediately got to work

1209
00:58:59,280 --> 00:59:01,600
Speaker 1: taking the burden off of Anna. We started a group

1210
00:59:01,720 --> 00:59:03,640
Speaker 1: chat with the wedding planner and the two friends who

1211
00:59:03,720 --> 00:59:07,200
Speaker 1: were helping. Then I booted Anna. We made sure that

1212
00:59:07,360 --> 00:59:09,760
Speaker 1: everything we needed was accounted for, and one of them

1213
00:59:09,800 --> 00:59:13,120
Speaker 1: revealed that Tory had reached out to her to try

1214
00:59:13,160 --> 00:59:16,520
Speaker 1: to provide a seating chart to one of the wedding planners. Tuesday,

1215
00:59:16,880 --> 00:59:19,640
Speaker 1: Anna and I drove two hours for her final fitting.

1216
00:59:19,720 --> 00:59:22,440
Speaker 1: On the way, Tory called and complained that she hadn't

1217
00:59:22,480 --> 00:59:24,960
Speaker 1: heard from me or the girls about the seating chart

1218
00:59:25,040 --> 00:59:28,280
Speaker 1: she provided. Anna calmly explained there was no need for

1219
00:59:28,360 --> 00:59:31,560
Speaker 1: a seating chart, and Tory got defensive again, claiming she

1220
00:59:31,680 --> 00:59:34,520
Speaker 1: had waited her whole life for this and no one

1221
00:59:34,680 --> 00:59:36,520
Speaker 1: was going to mess it up by sitting in the

1222
00:59:36,680 --> 00:59:37,480
Speaker 1: wrong place.

1223
00:59:37,800 --> 00:59:38,840
Speaker 3: Is that really gonna mess it up?

1224
00:59:38,880 --> 00:59:39,080
Speaker 2: Girl?

1225
00:59:39,320 --> 00:59:39,600
Speaker 3: Come on.

1226
00:59:39,840 --> 00:59:42,160
Speaker 1: Anna tried to tell her that there was no seating

1227
00:59:42,280 --> 00:59:45,720
Speaker 1: chart and Tory started crying. So I told Tory I

1228
00:59:45,720 --> 00:59:49,040
Speaker 1: would text her and hung up Anna's phone. Tory texted Anna,

1229
00:59:49,160 --> 00:59:51,360
Speaker 1: telling her to call back when she wasn't driving. Anna

1230
00:59:51,480 --> 00:59:53,800
Speaker 1: completely forgot because on the way home she got car

1231
00:59:53,960 --> 00:59:56,439
Speaker 1: sick and took a long nap. The next morning, Tory

1232
00:59:56,600 --> 01:00:00,160
Speaker 1: called hysterical, claiming she had called all the hospitals in

1233
01:00:00,200 --> 01:00:02,520
Speaker 1: the area because the only reason Anna wouldn't call her

1234
01:00:02,520 --> 01:00:04,200
Speaker 1: back was because she was passed away on the side

1235
01:00:04,200 --> 01:00:06,560
Speaker 1: of the road. Mind you, she never texted me back

1236
01:00:06,680 --> 01:00:09,120
Speaker 1: and never tried to call Anna again. The previous day,

1237
01:00:09,240 --> 01:00:11,439
Speaker 1: she once again was crying and saying how she wasn't

1238
01:00:11,440 --> 01:00:13,600
Speaker 1: even invited to the fitting of the dress, even though

1239
01:00:13,640 --> 01:00:15,800
Speaker 1: she had been waiting for this day or in dia life.

1240
01:00:15,880 --> 01:00:18,960
Speaker 1: The dress fitting was at Anna's seamstress's house, and it

1241
01:00:19,080 --> 01:00:23,480
Speaker 1: was literally a try. On Wednesday, came Cory and her husband,

1242
01:00:23,640 --> 01:00:27,720
Speaker 1: the kindest, quietest man you'll ever meet, arrived immediately. Tory

1243
01:00:27,800 --> 01:00:30,680
Speaker 1: gave me a huge hug and then began backhandedly commenting

1244
01:00:30,720 --> 01:00:33,080
Speaker 1: about how I had been there so much longer than

1245
01:00:33,120 --> 01:00:35,160
Speaker 1: the mother of the bride. It had been two days,

1246
01:00:35,280 --> 01:00:38,280
Speaker 1: with me flying in around four pm Monday and then

1247
01:00:38,400 --> 01:00:41,800
Speaker 1: Anna sleeping for four hours Tuesday, But sure so much longer,

1248
01:00:41,960 --> 01:00:43,720
Speaker 1: mind you. I had spent the time I was there

1249
01:00:43,800 --> 01:00:47,160
Speaker 1: hot gluing moss to flower arrangements and emotionally supporting Anna

1250
01:00:47,520 --> 01:00:50,800
Speaker 1: as she painted complicated mail art. But sure, technically I

1251
01:00:51,040 --> 01:00:53,680
Speaker 1: was there longer. Immediately Tory tried to get me on

1252
01:00:53,800 --> 01:00:56,760
Speaker 1: board with the seating chart idea. I shut her down

1253
01:00:57,240 --> 01:01:00,280
Speaker 1: and reminded her to compliment her daughter's nails because they

1254
01:01:00,320 --> 01:01:02,000
Speaker 1: had taken her two days to finish.

1255
01:01:02,280 --> 01:01:06,760
Speaker 4: Then she's, what, I know somebody that would take two

1256
01:01:06,840 --> 01:01:07,880
Speaker 4: days to finish nails?

1257
01:01:08,000 --> 01:01:08,960
Speaker 3: Hey, but what are they?

1258
01:01:09,120 --> 01:01:10,320
Speaker 4: Very complicated nails?

1259
01:01:10,400 --> 01:01:13,440
Speaker 1: I just mean, what, what do please elaborate? What kind

1260
01:01:13,480 --> 01:01:14,919
Speaker 1: of nails do you have that take two days?

1261
01:01:15,120 --> 01:01:19,040
Speaker 3: Well, I've never taken two days. Riley's crazy all day.

1262
01:01:19,280 --> 01:01:22,280
Speaker 1: That was the plural you in general, right.

1263
01:01:22,560 --> 01:01:26,280
Speaker 2: Some people there are some nail artists that like actually

1264
01:01:26,400 --> 01:01:31,600
Speaker 2: go crazy on nails, like full on mini just absolute

1265
01:01:31,720 --> 01:01:35,360
Speaker 2: works of art, like detailed faces and all this kind

1266
01:01:35,360 --> 01:01:37,840
Speaker 2: of stuff. So that's stuff I could see taking multiple days.

1267
01:01:37,920 --> 01:01:40,120
Speaker 2: So I'm not sure what these were. It doesn't seem

1268
01:01:40,200 --> 01:01:42,640
Speaker 2: like regular like, oh, I'm just gonna do some squirrels.

1269
01:01:43,320 --> 01:01:45,720
Speaker 2: That doesn't seem like the kind of nail art. It's

1270
01:01:45,840 --> 01:01:48,840
Speaker 2: probably some sort of like very detailed thing. Maybe she

1271
01:01:48,960 --> 01:01:51,680
Speaker 2: does that, like, yeah, as a hobby or professionally.

1272
01:01:51,760 --> 01:01:53,400
Speaker 1: Even she's probably goaded.

1273
01:01:53,800 --> 01:01:54,000
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1274
01:01:54,240 --> 01:01:58,240
Speaker 1: Then she started in about Marie and Anna's choices. Highlights

1275
01:01:58,400 --> 01:02:02,160
Speaker 1: include are you sure can't stand up with you? Yes?

1276
01:02:02,840 --> 01:02:05,920
Speaker 1: I haven't heard from Marie. Do you know if she's coming? No?

1277
01:02:06,440 --> 01:02:09,560
Speaker 1: Will there be a chance for Marie to help with anything? Nah?

1278
01:02:10,120 --> 01:02:13,160
Speaker 1: Where is Marie sleeping a hotel? Ted and Anna were

1279
01:02:13,200 --> 01:02:17,160
Speaker 1: paying for which she already knew. Where are your real shoes?

1280
01:02:17,200 --> 01:02:19,439
Speaker 1: You can't wear those? How are you doing your hair?

1281
01:02:19,720 --> 01:02:21,960
Speaker 1: Not up? I hope you really need a head table

1282
01:02:22,000 --> 01:02:24,040
Speaker 1: for you and Ted? How else are people going to

1283
01:02:24,120 --> 01:02:27,240
Speaker 1: chat with you? I don't know, walk up to them? Wild?

1284
01:02:27,520 --> 01:02:27,760
Speaker 6: I know.

1285
01:02:28,120 --> 01:02:31,560
Speaker 1: Her opinions fell to the cakee flavors, the color of

1286
01:02:31,600 --> 01:02:34,640
Speaker 1: Anna's nails, the dress she was wearing to the barbecue

1287
01:02:34,680 --> 01:02:36,920
Speaker 1: the next day, the type of drink served at the

1288
01:02:37,040 --> 01:02:40,000
Speaker 1: venue limited selection because it was a brewery and they

1289
01:02:40,000 --> 01:02:42,960
Speaker 1: can only serve their own beverages. All delicious, by the way.

1290
01:02:43,160 --> 01:02:46,160
Speaker 1: She wanted to rearrange the centerpieces, organize the favors a

1291
01:02:46,200 --> 01:02:49,800
Speaker 1: different way, and comment on the colors. Every single thing

1292
01:02:50,000 --> 01:02:51,520
Speaker 1: was bookended by I've been.

1293
01:02:51,400 --> 01:02:52,960
Speaker 3: Waiting my whole life for this day.

1294
01:02:53,480 --> 01:02:56,320
Speaker 1: You've been waiting your whole life for your daughter's wedding.

1295
01:02:56,640 --> 01:03:00,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, come on, just when like not it's I could.

1296
01:03:00,800 --> 01:03:03,440
Speaker 2: I can understand saying that about the actual wedding day,

1297
01:03:03,640 --> 01:03:06,640
Speaker 2: but about little days like this that are involved.

1298
01:03:06,800 --> 01:03:08,520
Speaker 3: You don't need to. I don't think you've been waiting

1299
01:03:08,720 --> 01:03:11,840
Speaker 3: every day or your whole life for that. No, I

1300
01:03:11,920 --> 01:03:12,520
Speaker 3: don't think so.

1301
01:03:13,040 --> 01:03:19,280
Speaker 1: In titled yeah, she kept referring to Ted's daughter as

1302
01:03:19,400 --> 01:03:23,320
Speaker 1: her future step granddaughter and the only grandchild she would

1303
01:03:23,320 --> 01:03:26,080
Speaker 1: ever have. Like, woman, they've been together since this kid

1304
01:03:26,240 --> 01:03:28,320
Speaker 1: was five, and this is a surprise to you now,

1305
01:03:28,520 --> 01:03:30,640
Speaker 1: she would make sure to say it loudly and pointedly.

1306
01:03:30,880 --> 01:03:34,360
Speaker 1: Friday rolls around. Marie shows up. Thankfully, Tory was at

1307
01:03:34,400 --> 01:03:37,040
Speaker 1: the hotel most of the day handling that mess. We

1308
01:03:37,120 --> 01:03:39,080
Speaker 1: still managed to get a few wish I was there.

1309
01:03:39,240 --> 01:03:41,520
Speaker 1: I've been dreaming blah blah blah blah blah texts from

1310
01:03:41,560 --> 01:03:44,760
Speaker 1: her wedding day rolls around. Everything is happening. They show

1311
01:03:44,840 --> 01:03:47,840
Speaker 1: up on time, thank whatever. Teaki gods we're watching over

1312
01:03:47,960 --> 01:03:51,040
Speaker 1: us and she looks lovely. The officiant shows up and

1313
01:03:51,160 --> 01:03:53,520
Speaker 1: they're talking. He must have mentioned that Anna and Ted

1314
01:03:53,640 --> 01:03:56,720
Speaker 1: are having a hand fasting ceremony, and Tory makes a

1315
01:03:56,920 --> 01:04:00,560
Speaker 1: bee line for me. She is adamant that they don't

1316
01:04:00,600 --> 01:04:03,800
Speaker 1: do it, like red faced, and furious they didn't mention

1317
01:04:03,920 --> 01:04:06,760
Speaker 1: it to her. She didn't approve it. I'm like, girl,

1318
01:04:07,160 --> 01:04:11,240
Speaker 1: this isn't your call. You have zero say. Anna wants

1319
01:04:11,240 --> 01:04:13,760
Speaker 1: a hand fasting. She gets a hand fasting. She starts

1320
01:04:13,840 --> 01:04:17,240
Speaker 1: talking about how it's bad luck and pagan rituals don't

1321
01:04:17,280 --> 01:04:19,880
Speaker 1: belong in church, to which I pointed out, We're at

1322
01:04:19,920 --> 01:04:22,120
Speaker 1: a brewery, by the way. You know what a pagan

1323
01:04:22,200 --> 01:04:24,240
Speaker 1: ritual is Christmas trees.

1324
01:04:24,840 --> 01:04:25,280
Speaker 3: Idiot.

1325
01:04:26,760 --> 01:04:30,320
Speaker 1: God, yeah, I would just do that.

1326
01:04:30,400 --> 01:04:36,960
Speaker 2: I go, yeah, this is not We don't need to

1327
01:04:37,000 --> 01:04:39,680
Speaker 2: freak out over this right now. I just need to

1328
01:04:39,720 --> 01:04:43,560
Speaker 2: freak out back to this person. That's the only reasonable

1329
01:04:43,600 --> 01:04:44,120
Speaker 2: freak out.

1330
01:04:44,280 --> 01:04:47,120
Speaker 1: Yeah. I'm pretty sure if there's one wedding venue in

1331
01:04:47,200 --> 01:04:50,120
Speaker 1: the world that is completely cool with hand fasting, it

1332
01:04:50,280 --> 01:04:53,280
Speaker 1: is a micro brewery in the middle of nowhere. She

1333
01:04:53,440 --> 01:04:56,439
Speaker 1: is livid, tells me that she can't believe they would

1334
01:04:56,520 --> 01:04:59,480
Speaker 1: do this to her. Mind you, this woman is not religious.

1335
01:05:00,000 --> 01:05:02,440
Speaker 1: Anna and Marie have never once been to church in

1336
01:05:02,520 --> 01:05:05,680
Speaker 1: their lives. Anna was shocked and appalled that I know

1337
01:05:05,880 --> 01:05:09,000
Speaker 1: the Lord's prayer by heart thanks religious trauma. So where

1338
01:05:09,080 --> 01:05:11,440
Speaker 1: this sudden piety is coming from, I have no idea.

1339
01:05:11,600 --> 01:05:13,960
Speaker 1: I remind Tory that I have the power to remove

1340
01:05:14,160 --> 01:05:18,240
Speaker 1: anyone who tries to change anything from this point forward,

1341
01:05:18,400 --> 01:05:21,560
Speaker 1: and she sulks off to complain to someone else. She

1342
01:05:21,800 --> 01:05:25,240
Speaker 1: gets her crap together and the ceremony goes off without

1343
01:05:25,280 --> 01:05:27,320
Speaker 1: a hitch. Oh that's unfortunate. I thought that was the

1344
01:05:27,360 --> 01:05:28,560
Speaker 1: whole point they were getting hitched.

1345
01:05:29,040 --> 01:05:36,040
Speaker 3: Ah, you have hitch.

1346
01:05:37,360 --> 01:05:40,000
Speaker 1: Slap that knee three times for that. That's pretty good

1347
01:05:40,560 --> 01:05:43,000
Speaker 1: time more than the last. Okay, there's a little bit

1348
01:05:43,040 --> 01:05:46,640
Speaker 1: more left here. Let's go ahead and just obliterate it. Afterwards,

1349
01:05:46,680 --> 01:05:48,440
Speaker 1: she comes to me and tells me that she's so

1350
01:05:48,680 --> 01:05:51,760
Speaker 1: glad it's done and she can relax because planning this

1351
01:05:51,880 --> 01:05:53,560
Speaker 1: wedding has been one of the most stressful things in

1352
01:05:53,640 --> 01:05:56,120
Speaker 1: her life. Cool. Cool, Cool. I can't feel my feet,

1353
01:05:56,160 --> 01:05:58,000
Speaker 1: I have heat blisters on my fingers from the glue,

1354
01:05:58,360 --> 01:06:00,640
Speaker 1: and I'm still watching Marie like a hawk in case

1355
01:06:00,680 --> 01:06:03,480
Speaker 1: she manages to get the microphone. But sure, Tori's stressed.

1356
01:06:03,640 --> 01:06:06,080
Speaker 1: But and I cannot stress this enough. I am so

1357
01:06:06,400 --> 01:06:08,640
Speaker 1: happy that I got to be there for my bestie

1358
01:06:08,920 --> 01:06:11,320
Speaker 1: and make sure she had the best day. And that

1359
01:06:11,520 --> 01:06:12,600
Speaker 1: is the end of that story.