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Speaker 1: Welcome to the Therapy for Black Girls Podcast, a weekly

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Speaker 1: conversation about mental health, personal development, and all the small

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Speaker 1: decisions we can make to become the best possible versions

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Speaker 1: of ourselves. I'm your host, doctor joy hard and Bradford,

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Speaker 1: a licensed psychologist in Atlanta, Georgia. For more information or

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Speaker 1: to find a therapist in your area, visit our website

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Speaker 1: at Therapy for Blackgirls dot com. While I hope you

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Speaker 1: love listening to and learning from the podcast, it is

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Speaker 1: not meant to be a substitute for a relationship with

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Speaker 1: a licensed mental health professional. Hey, y'all, thanks so much

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Speaker 1: for joining me for session four forty of the Therapy

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Speaker 1: for Black Girls Podcast. We'll get right into our conversation

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Speaker 1: afterword from our sponsors. It's that time again. Today I'm

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Speaker 1: kicking back with our incredible production team as we reflect

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Speaker 1: on twenty twenty five, what we learned, what we're leaving behind,

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Speaker 1: and dive into what it looks like to balance rest

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Speaker 1: during the holiday season. As the year comes to a close,

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Speaker 1: I encourage you to check in with your own circle

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Speaker 1: to reflect on your year. What moments stuck with you,

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Speaker 1: what was your biggest lesson, How much did you actually

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Speaker 1: rest it's important to pause, check in and remember that

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Speaker 1: after a long year, a recharge is necessary. If something

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Speaker 1: resonates with you while enjoying our conversation, please share with

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Speaker 1: us on social media using the hashtag TVG in session.

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Speaker 1: Here's our conversation. All right, I'm very excited to reconvene

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Speaker 1: the group. We have not had a producer chat it

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Speaker 1: feels like in some times, so it felt fitting to

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Speaker 1: wrap up the year with some reflections and thinking about

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Speaker 1: how we are moving into twenty twenty six. So every

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Speaker 1: week at our production meeting, we start with a team

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Speaker 1: checking question, so we thought it would be great to

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Speaker 1: bring that to the podcast this week. So our question

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Speaker 1: for this episode is, are you in your cozy soft era?

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Speaker 1: You don't ask me about my life choices era, or

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Speaker 1: you I'm only here for the food era. As we

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Speaker 1: move into the holiday season.

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Speaker 2: I am definitely in my cozy soft era. Although I am.

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Speaker 3: Hosting Thanksgiving, it doesn't feel as let me not lie.

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Speaker 3: It was definitely stressful, but now that the week is here,

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Speaker 3: most of the food is bought. Anything that like I'm

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Speaker 3: doing catering, or like flowers are ordered like all of that,

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Speaker 3: I'm like, okay, all I have to do is put

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Speaker 3: it together, which i've is exciting for me. But outside

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Speaker 3: of that, I am doing a staycation in California.

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Speaker 4: I've bought all the.

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Speaker 3: Things to even like cozy up my home, new robes

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Speaker 3: and being lighting.

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Speaker 2: So I'm here for the vibes this holiday season. I'm

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Speaker 2: not here for the drama. I feel like this year

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Speaker 2: I'm may be uniquely.

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Speaker 3: Disinterested in like the food of it all. I don't

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Speaker 3: know why, Like I can't pinpoint like anything. I'm really

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Speaker 3: excited to eat, but like the community, maybe play some games,

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Speaker 3: watch some movies.

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Speaker 2: If anyone wants to get me a gift, I'm interested

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Speaker 2: in blankets and robes, so I'm definitely in the era.

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Speaker 5: I love the mass announcement, the mass.

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Speaker 3: Who's listening, You never know who's listening listen.

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Speaker 1: I have heard good things about these Lola blankets. Now

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Speaker 1: I have never felt or touched them, but I keep

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Speaker 1: hearing people on TikTok talk about these blankets that are

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Speaker 1: like the best blankets they've ever had, so that may

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Speaker 1: be on your wish list.

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Speaker 4: I also just.

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Speaker 5: Bought an ll being blanket that I got because I

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Speaker 5: have a long body and so oftentimes my feet are

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Speaker 5: you know, we're fighting to stay inside of the blanket.

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Speaker 5: I bought an ll bean blanket and it's like extra

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Speaker 5: long and you can like mine agreement for six dollars,

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Speaker 5: you're just quete and it is very soft.

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Speaker 4: So and it was like forty five dollars. It was

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Speaker 4: not like crazy.

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Speaker 6: So I actually have changed my mind, and I think

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Speaker 6: that I'm officially in the which you should as a

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Speaker 6: black person, you should probably always be.

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Speaker 7: But I'm definitely in my who all gonna be their era.

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Speaker 6: I think I was chronically outside this year to my detriment,

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Speaker 6: and now I'm just wising up and just like, no,

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Speaker 6: who's gonna be there because I actually don't need or

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Speaker 6: you know, who's.

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Speaker 7: Gonna be there?

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Speaker 6: Because I really only got fifteen minutes for this kind

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Speaker 6: of parlais.

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Speaker 7: So That's where I'm at.

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Speaker 5: Okay, I too will say I'm in my cozy era.

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Speaker 5: I love the holidays. My birthday is during the holidays,

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Speaker 5: so I can very much lean into the celebration of

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Speaker 5: it all starting really like November first, I'm like for

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Speaker 5: the next two months, really like till January.

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Speaker 4: Second, I'm having a ball. I'm hosting friends.

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Speaker 5: Must my friends and I usually do like a really

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Speaker 5: intense friends giving, but we're doing friends Miss to kind

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Speaker 5: of like curb how intense it can be. So I

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Speaker 5: am excited to host and like decorate and all of

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Speaker 5: those things. I am not similar to Elsa. I'm not

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Speaker 5: getting too heavy into the cooking. We will be ordering things.

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Speaker 5: I also feel like friends Miss like is less intense

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Speaker 5: when it comes to what needs.

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Speaker 4: To be on the table. But yeah, I'm excited.

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Speaker 5: I like want to go look at Christmas lights and

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Speaker 5: all of those things. I've been updating my holiday playlist,

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Speaker 5: so that's kind of how I'm feeling this year.

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Speaker 1: I feel like I have been in my cozy girl

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Speaker 1: era probably for the last like three years really since

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Speaker 1: the pandemic when like we were kind of forced to

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Speaker 1: be home and I'm like, I really kind of like

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Speaker 1: it here and I actually don't want to leave my house.

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Speaker 1: So well, I feel like I have been cozy for

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Speaker 1: the past several years. The holidays are feeling a little

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Speaker 1: different now that my kids are getting older, so like

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Speaker 1: we have just gone through the exercise of their like

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Speaker 1: Christmas list, right, the list look very different this year

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Speaker 1: than they have, Like they're not you know, like oh

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Speaker 1: a Nintendo game and like some you know toys, like

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Speaker 1: they are very in this teen tween ish where it's like, oh,

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Speaker 1: these designer hoodies and Jordan's and you know if cars,

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Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh, we are not in the little

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Speaker 1: kid version of Christmas anymore. So that that is a

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Speaker 1: new development on the horizon for me at least, I'm curious.

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Speaker 1: Are you hosting your family for Thanksgiving or are you

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Speaker 1: hosting like friends?

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Speaker 3: No, I'm hosting my family, okay for Thanksgiving, and then

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Speaker 3: I have three friends who are also coming as part

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Speaker 3: of the Thanksgiving. But yeah, this is a proper I

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Speaker 3: mean it's a proper Thanksgiving.

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Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 7: Can I invite myself? I'm going to be in California.

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Speaker 4: That's how invited himself.

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Speaker 2: Feel free, no, feel free to come buy, come by.

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Speaker 1: I love that it reminds me of the conversations online

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Speaker 1: where people are like, oh, we are continuing to like

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Speaker 1: wait on the Aunties to do the things, but it's like, no,

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Speaker 1: we're actually the Aunties now, right. So I love that

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Speaker 1: you are stepping into hosting the family for Thanksgiving.

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Speaker 3: Yes, I'm extremely excited. I am cooking a lot of things.

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Speaker 3: I don't eat meat, so my cousin's husband, I'm like,

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Speaker 3: you married.

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Speaker 2: Into a vegetarian family, you need to bring.

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Speaker 3: I didn't you knew what was up for you. But

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Speaker 3: other than that, I'm cooking everything. I did a test

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Speaker 3: run of a sweet potato pie last night because I'm

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Speaker 3: not gonna say I don't like it. I just like

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Speaker 3: don't eat it as much as other pies that I've made.

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Speaker 2: So I was like, Okay, I need to like test

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Speaker 2: this out.

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Speaker 3: Pretty simple. I'm very excited. I'm also excited for like

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Speaker 3: the tablescape of it all. I've been meticulously planning that.

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Speaker 3: I had to get new plates, which is Thanksgiving is expensive,

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Speaker 3: and my mom was saying, like, why is it so expensive?

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Speaker 2: And I'm like, well, you had a home for thirty years,

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Speaker 2: like there are things you don't have.

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Speaker 3: But now that I happen, I feel prepared to host

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Speaker 3: more and more over the holidays and beyond.

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Speaker 7: You can a pie alice?

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Speaker 6: Will your grandmother's Tomali pie recipe be making an appearance

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Speaker 6: at this Thanksgiving.

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Speaker 2: Way? It's just not good like that.

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Speaker 5: I feel like last time you were doing this right

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Speaker 5: And I was like, what is tomaly pie's that's.

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Speaker 1: Clearly not like a sweet is that it's clearly like

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Speaker 1: a meeting.

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Speaker 2: A savor, a southern Californian.

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Speaker 3: I feel like, ditch, Okay, that's not good, Like that's

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Speaker 3: the only thing.

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Speaker 7: I like it.

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Speaker 6: I do, But I love Tamali, so like that's yeah,

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Speaker 6: I'm a savory person over sweets.

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Speaker 3: Anyway, if I was having Thanksgiving at home, like my

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Speaker 3: Mom's Thanksgiving, there would definitely be and to Molly separately

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Speaker 3: like the oh, everyone's just getting here.

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Speaker 2: Do you want it?

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Speaker 7: To Molly?

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Speaker 2: And I'm like, that is a meal.

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Speaker 4: Like an order.

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Speaker 5: Yes, I mean I'm intrigued. The tomali pie intrigues me.

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Speaker 4: I'd want to try it.

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Speaker 1: Hmm. I don't know that I'm as intrigued that something.

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Speaker 1: Get me, get out and you can have my serving inde.

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Speaker 1: So one of the major accomplishments I feel like we

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Speaker 1: had as a team this year was our limited series,

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Speaker 1: The Siblings Sit Down, which we just wrapped up a

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Speaker 1: couple of weeks ago, and so I also wanted to

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Speaker 1: spend some time today just kind of reflecting on that

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Speaker 1: because I feel like that was the first like real

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Speaker 1: series that we've had as this version of the team,

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Speaker 1: which has been exciting and so any thoughts on the

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Speaker 1: heels of that. Did you enjoy that? Is there anything

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Speaker 1: that you're taking away from that you think about for

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Speaker 1: maybe future series that we might do.

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Speaker 5: I really enjoyed it because it's like siblings.

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Speaker 4: Sibling ship is a broad topic that there are so

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Speaker 4: many different points you can hit.

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Speaker 5: And again, like we talked about, even if you don't

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Speaker 5: have biological siblings, you can still have sibling like relationships

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Speaker 5: with like close friends, cousins, and so I think, like

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Speaker 5: there is so much to talk about and no set

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Speaker 5: group of siblings is the same, and I think I

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Speaker 5: like enjoyed kind of exploring those dynamics and also hearing

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Speaker 5: things and you're like, oh relatable. I think especially with

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Speaker 5: the Amos Siblings episode. I've been listening to her podcast,

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Speaker 5: so I think listening to their episode and then listening

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Speaker 5: to the Tough Cookie podcast, you're like seeing all of

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Speaker 5: the dynamics at play, and it's such a blended family,

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Speaker 5: and I think so many of us are in blended

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Speaker 5: families and those dynamics can be all over the place.

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Speaker 5: But You're like, it makes me feel like okay, like

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Speaker 5: I'm not the only person navigating this. So I don't know,

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Speaker 5: I think I like the idea of like speaking on

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Speaker 5: something very broadly and like picking out all of the

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Speaker 5: different threads and povs, and I feel like there's still

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Speaker 5: so much more we can talk about.

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Speaker 4: I also love sisters.

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Speaker 5: So the Skuyler and Sunlent episode, like I realized I

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Speaker 5: like collect sisters sister friends.

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Speaker 1: It's like a thing, like have sense of siblings, like

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Speaker 1: sets of sisters.

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Speaker 5: Yes, like I'll have one friend that's a sister, and

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Speaker 5: then just by proxy, I become friends with like the

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Speaker 5: older younger sister.

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Speaker 4: But I just love sister dynamics.

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Speaker 7: I don't know why.

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Speaker 5: So it's always fun getting to know like sisters. I

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Speaker 5: think sisters are fun.

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Speaker 3: I've was really excited for this series from the get

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Speaker 3: go because sibling relationships are so complicated, and although there's

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Speaker 3: a host of like movies and media where siblings hate

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Speaker 3: each other or they're best friends, I do think the

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Speaker 3: general discussion in the way we may discuss like dating,

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Speaker 3: I don't see that happen as much about siblings. So

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Speaker 3: I think I was really excited for that reason. Like

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Speaker 3: and they said, I have two sisters. I love sisters,

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Speaker 3: but I do think it can be like a complicated

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Speaker 3: relationship because it in a way can also mirror like

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Speaker 3: female friendship, and that's not something we uniquely explored, but

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Speaker 3: I'm definitely excited to do that if slash when we

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Speaker 3: do this again. And then, I think what was really

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Speaker 3: great about the Sean and Sarah Amos episode was realizing

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Speaker 3: that your life with your siblings is not just your

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Speaker 3: teens or your twenties or your thirties, like it is

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Speaker 3: a lifelong relationship. And I do think a lot of

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Speaker 3: the times when it comes to mending relationships, there is

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Speaker 3: so much immediacy and yes, like not to be morbid,

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Speaker 3: but like people pass, but you do have time, and

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Speaker 3: things take time, and like life events, can you know

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Speaker 3: ebb and flow your sibling relationships.

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Speaker 2: And so it was good to really.

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Speaker 3: See that, I guess, in real life practice with their episode,

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Speaker 3: and that I thought was really beautiful too.

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Speaker 7: I love that.

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Speaker 6: I think the big thing it made me think about

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Speaker 6: in my own family is the intergenerational elements of being siblings.

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Speaker 6: Like you kind of think of your aunts and your

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Speaker 6: uncles as like definitts of the yours, but then they

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Speaker 6: have this like unique sibling relationship with your parents that

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Speaker 6: you sort of unpack and like how they're unhinged or

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Speaker 6: like problem solve in different ways. Like I know for

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Speaker 6: me and my siblings, we have like active conversations about

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Speaker 6: now that is your grandma beef for hussus.

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Speaker 7: Just don't get it.

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Speaker 6: Don't get yourself involved in it, because it's like it's

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Speaker 6: very easy to like think that you're taking a side

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Speaker 6: and then they'll turn on you.

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Speaker 7: So I thought about that. I thought about that a lot.

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Speaker 6: And also I think what I appreciated about the AMS

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Speaker 6: interview was just how and they pointed out like they're

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Speaker 6: a blended family, and I think that there's been like

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Speaker 6: a long seated shame and being blended families as black people,

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Speaker 6: even though like we all kind of group with like

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Speaker 6: the Brady Brunch and the Partridge family, but there's no

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Speaker 6: like black media representation of that, or if there is,

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Speaker 6: it's kind of like a negative connotation to not having

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Speaker 6: the same two parents and the way that they're able

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Speaker 6: to build their sibling relationship, especially as like only sharing

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Speaker 6: a father, I think that it's a much different thing

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Speaker 6: than sharing a mom where you might not feel as connected,

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Speaker 6: but they have those relationships with their stepmothers as well.

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Speaker 6: Like it was really dope to see and I'm excited

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Speaker 6: to do this next year as well.

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Speaker 5: Same my cousin calls that ad vintage beef. He's like,

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Speaker 5: you can I participate in a vintage beef?

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Speaker 4: I'm like, you're right.

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Speaker 1: One of the things that was I think the coolest

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Speaker 1: in kind of producing these conversations and like just all

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Speaker 1: the prep we did to kind of bring them to life,

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Speaker 1: was hearing more about your relationships with y'all siblings, right,

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Speaker 1: because that's not something that necessarily enters into team meetings

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Speaker 1: all the time, right, But of course, as we're thinking

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Speaker 1: about what conversations that we're gonna want to have, then

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Speaker 1: y'all started sharing about your relationships with your siblings. I

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Speaker 1: wonder did that lead to any additional conversations with your siblings,

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Speaker 1: like either the prep work or stuff that you heard

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Speaker 1: in the conversations with the siblings that we talked to.

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Speaker 5: Not yet, but it has like been on my mind.

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Speaker 5: I think I'll share with you guys. I have like, well,

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Speaker 5: you know, my mom's siblings dad something, So I have

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Speaker 5: a lot of siblings on my dad's side, and I

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Speaker 5: feel like it's been easier to develop relationships with them

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Speaker 5: as i've gotten older and as they've gotten older, like

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Speaker 5: I'm a big sister to my two little sisters. And

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Speaker 5: so again going back to the Amos siblings, when I

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Speaker 5: was listening to their podcast, Sarah was talking to one

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Speaker 5: of her older brothers and he basically said that he

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Speaker 5: talked about like how they had issues with their dad

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Speaker 5: or whatever, and how he kind of like stopped talking

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Speaker 5: to his dad. But he was like, I never realized

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Speaker 5: that when I pushed him out, I pushed you out too.

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Speaker 5: He was like, that never occurred to me, and so

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Speaker 5: he kind of, you know, talked about just like kind

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Speaker 5: of going to repair that and looking at those relationships

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Speaker 5: as two separate relationships. And so I think that is

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Speaker 5: a thing that I have been navigating and also just

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Speaker 5: learning to accept, like just being like you can't group

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Speaker 5: all of these things together, like these relationships are separate.

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Speaker 5: I feel like there's also something I've talked about in

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Speaker 5: therapy too, like just separating those relationships, and so it's

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Speaker 5: not something that we've spoken about, but I think just

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Speaker 5: this year in general has been kind of like a

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Speaker 5: big sibling year for me, like spending more time with siblings,

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Speaker 5: even my sibling that I grew up with like talking

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Speaker 5: to him more about what's going on in his life

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Speaker 5: and not just being like, hey, what's that. So I yeah,

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Speaker 5: I feel like siblings. It's funny that we did this series,

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Speaker 5: so I feel like siblings have been like a big

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Speaker 5: point in like the star of my year a bit,

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Speaker 5: so it feels timely.

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Speaker 6: I tell everyone like, I'm one of six children, and

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Speaker 6: the way I break that down is that I'm in

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Speaker 6: five group chats about one of them, and I know

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Speaker 6: that there's like also one about me. But I think

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Speaker 6: that after this we've probably gotten a little bit better

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Speaker 6: about like bringing some offline conversations to the main group

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Speaker 6: chat that has all six people in it. So it's

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Speaker 6: just like a little less behind your back talking. Although

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Speaker 6: we're going to keep that going because it is very funny.

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Speaker 1: That feels like it would be very hard to make

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Speaker 1: sure you're in the right group chat and not end

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Speaker 1: up talking about the sibling net. It's not in the chat.

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Speaker 6: They all have like really specific names, and so it's

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Speaker 6: very like it's a time like you know, it's having

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Speaker 6: like built in best friends, which is funny because like

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Speaker 6: it's a twenty year age gap between all six of us.

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Speaker 7: It's just a lot of shit talking, and I don't know,

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Speaker 7: it keeps you sharp.

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Speaker 3: I think for me, it was very refreshing that, you know,

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Speaker 3: not that I want this for them, but that Somenone

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Speaker 3: and Skyler got in an argument in Japan.

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Speaker 2: I had just come back from Japan with my.

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Speaker 3: And we transferred too late and one of the stations

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Speaker 3: had closed, so we had to get Uber from the station.

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Speaker 3: It wasn't like a crazy uber or anything like that,

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Speaker 3: but we really wanted to have like one successful intercity

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Speaker 3: train trip from Kyoto to Osaka, and we didn't have that,

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Speaker 3: and I like, she was leading us, given the directions,

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Speaker 3: and I was just like, you don't need to explain anymore.

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Speaker 2: We just need to get out of the situation. So

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Speaker 2: to know that sometimes it is refreshing.

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Speaker 3: Like I love my sister, like I am her biggest fan,

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Speaker 3: but we do argue and sometimes I'm like, oh my god,

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Speaker 3: I feel so bad, like I don't want to argue

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Speaker 3: with my little sister. But to have other people tell

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Speaker 3: those stories, especially such a similar story, it was like, Okay,

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Speaker 3: I'm just human, not a terrible person.

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Speaker 2: People have emotions.

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Speaker 3: And then I thought what was also really refreshing for me,

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Speaker 3: which I've talked a little bit with my siblings about

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Speaker 3: is like how losing a parent can really like shift

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Speaker 3: the relationships both for like better and for worse.

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Speaker 2: And I feel like it's something I've unpacked, like within myself.

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Speaker 2: Maybe my dad passed maybe.

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Speaker 3: Six seven years ago, so around that time, I think

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Speaker 3: it was something we were talking about a little more presently.

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Speaker 3: But it has definitely inspired me to think about that

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Speaker 3: or like think about my sibling relationships and how they shifted.

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Speaker 1: Since then, it has felt like there has been a

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Speaker 1: lot of energy. Once we wrapped the series, I think

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Speaker 1: all of us felt very pleased with the way it

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00:19:16,520 --> 00:19:20,640
Speaker 1: turned out. And I definitely felt very alive, I think

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Speaker 1: in those interviews because it kind of mimiced therapy in

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Speaker 1: a lot of ways for me. Not I mean, clearly

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Speaker 1: they weren't on the couch, so to speak, but I

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Speaker 1: feel like I don't do a lot of therapy anymore,

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Speaker 1: and so like talking with a sibling sit and the

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Speaker 1: dynamic was like, oh, I kind of missed this dynamic.

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Speaker 1: And so we've definitely explored are there other angles to

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Speaker 1: explore if we bring the series back? What might we

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Speaker 1: want to do? So any kind of early preliminary thoughts

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Speaker 1: for if there is a continuation of this series or

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Speaker 1: a different version of this series, what other angles or

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Speaker 1: maybe topics might we want to explore.

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Speaker 6: I've been watching the Braxtons them like revamp version and

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00:19:56,960 --> 00:19:59,000
Speaker 6: just the stuff that they've been going through as a

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Speaker 6: family and specific Tamar, I think as a younger sibling.

393
00:20:03,640 --> 00:20:06,800
Speaker 7: Being gas lit constantly. And I mean I'm using.

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Speaker 6: That term without her degree, but it does feel like

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Speaker 6: that's what's happening. I would like to explore like youngest

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Speaker 6: sibling like emergence and adulthood, because I do think that

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Speaker 6: so much of your personality is formed by all of

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Speaker 6: the siblings that came before you. But there's also this

399
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Speaker 6: inability in mind you Tamar's mid to late forties mid

400
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Speaker 6: Like it's an inability of the family at large to

401
00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:32,280
Speaker 6: like recognize your adulthood and autonomy and how does that

402
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Speaker 6: impact you.

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Speaker 1: It's a good one. I have not tapped into this

404
00:20:35,640 --> 00:20:37,280
Speaker 1: Braxton's reboot as of yet.

405
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Speaker 4: It's a lot it looks tumultuous. No, I think that's

406
00:20:42,520 --> 00:20:45,119
Speaker 4: a good point, like the baby of the family of

407
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Speaker 4: it all.

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Speaker 3: Sorry, I definitely want to explore siblings who have started

409
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Speaker 3: a business together and how that has affected their relationship.

410
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Speaker 3: So that would be really interesting to me or who

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Speaker 3: are in the entertainment business because that does put a lot.

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Speaker 4: Of sures on family.

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Speaker 3: And then the second thing I was thinking about, which

414
00:21:04,600 --> 00:21:07,359
Speaker 3: I think extends more to family, but I've seen on

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Speaker 3: TikTok and some like YouTube vogs are siblings who live

416
00:21:10,520 --> 00:21:14,080
Speaker 3: in like compounds. So it's like, this is your home

417
00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:16,840
Speaker 3: connected to my home, and it's.

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Speaker 2: Like why they want to do that?

419
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Speaker 3: Because I was like I kind of like that, So

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Speaker 3: that was something that if you know, we could find

421
00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:26,320
Speaker 3: a pair of siblings who are doing that or started

422
00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:28,040
Speaker 3: to do that, I think would be really interesting.

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Speaker 6: That's actually not uncommon in New York, Like if your

424
00:21:32,640 --> 00:21:36,359
Speaker 6: family owns a house, converting it into multiple apartments.

425
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Speaker 7: I know a couple of families like that.

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Speaker 4: My friends and I have joke about like living on

427
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Speaker 4: a compound and being like, let's just put everybody in

428
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Speaker 4: one place feels very convenient.

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Speaker 1: So thinking about you know, like a lot of the

430
00:21:48,720 --> 00:21:51,880
Speaker 1: conversations we've had this year have been around, Okay, how

431
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Speaker 1: do we take care of ourselves? Especially in this moment

432
00:21:54,359 --> 00:21:57,000
Speaker 1: in history, This time of year is one where people

433
00:21:57,119 --> 00:21:59,760
Speaker 1: kind of naturally are kind of thinking about more resting

434
00:21:59,800 --> 00:22:03,320
Speaker 1: and reflecting, and what are we bringing into the next year,

435
00:22:03,359 --> 00:22:06,280
Speaker 1: what are we leaving in twenty twenty five. So when

436
00:22:06,320 --> 00:22:09,199
Speaker 1: you look back at any intentions or resolutions that you

437
00:22:09,240 --> 00:22:11,879
Speaker 1: said for yourself in twenty twenty five, what did you

438
00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:14,040
Speaker 1: keep up with and what did you let go?

439
00:22:14,440 --> 00:22:15,919
Speaker 7: Ooh, this is a good one, Okay.

440
00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:20,320
Speaker 6: So I remember distinctly writing out the sentence that I

441
00:22:20,359 --> 00:22:25,880
Speaker 6: wanted to ambitiously pursue pleasure because I think that I'm capricorn,

442
00:22:26,160 --> 00:22:29,399
Speaker 6: naturally ambitious, naturally like following career paths and kind of

443
00:22:29,440 --> 00:22:31,560
Speaker 6: like doing that. But it's very hard for me to

444
00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:34,639
Speaker 6: like plan a vacation and take myself out for my

445
00:22:34,680 --> 00:22:37,560
Speaker 6: birthday or just do something just because it's like fun,

446
00:22:37,760 --> 00:22:41,080
Speaker 6: or do something that doesn't have end goal in mind.

447
00:22:41,440 --> 00:22:44,800
Speaker 6: So I was like very ambitious about doing that this year.

448
00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:48,040
Speaker 6: This is the first year that I actually celebrated my

449
00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:51,520
Speaker 6: birthday with a SPA trip and went on like a

450
00:22:51,560 --> 00:22:54,480
Speaker 6: weekend trip like just to go see the thing, and

451
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:57,440
Speaker 6: planning like a trip for the end of the year,

452
00:22:57,920 --> 00:23:00,920
Speaker 6: and being like ambitious about it in that, like I'm

453
00:23:00,960 --> 00:23:04,399
Speaker 6: actually taking setting out times to put that together. It

454
00:23:04,480 --> 00:23:06,280
Speaker 6: is a headache. I think that the reason why I

455
00:23:06,280 --> 00:23:07,840
Speaker 6: haven't done it in the past is because I've just

456
00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:09,359
Speaker 6: been waiting for someone else to do it for me.

457
00:23:09,800 --> 00:23:12,399
Speaker 6: But what I have learned is, like is important to

458
00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:13,399
Speaker 6: do those things.

459
00:23:13,800 --> 00:23:17,120
Speaker 5: I think I this year, I mean I think every year,

460
00:23:17,160 --> 00:23:19,920
Speaker 5: I'm like, move your body.

461
00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:20,400
Speaker 4: Be active.

462
00:23:21,240 --> 00:23:22,760
Speaker 5: It's just something I wanna do all the time, not

463
00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:25,040
Speaker 5: even as like a resolution, but it's like an intention

464
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:28,159
Speaker 5: that I like to set. It is also helpful but

465
00:23:28,320 --> 00:23:30,320
Speaker 5: sometimes stressful, that my birthday is at the end of

466
00:23:30,359 --> 00:23:31,920
Speaker 5: the year, so it's like the beginning of the year

467
00:23:31,960 --> 00:23:33,640
Speaker 5: for the world, but also the beginning of the year

468
00:23:33,720 --> 00:23:34,080
Speaker 5: for me.

469
00:23:34,480 --> 00:23:36,320
Speaker 4: It's like the end of the year. And I'm like, Okay,

470
00:23:36,320 --> 00:23:40,800
Speaker 4: I think I've been pretty consistently active. I love to

471
00:23:40,920 --> 00:23:41,959
Speaker 4: go on a walk.

472
00:23:42,160 --> 00:23:45,320
Speaker 5: I'm like, I do consider myself a real walker. So

473
00:23:45,359 --> 00:23:47,879
Speaker 5: some people are like, god, it's sweating. I'm like, no, Like,

474
00:23:48,760 --> 00:23:51,160
Speaker 5: when I say walk, I mean like a few miles

475
00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:53,440
Speaker 5: at least, So I'm proud of that.

476
00:23:53,880 --> 00:23:57,680
Speaker 4: And I think I also I'm a Sagittarius.

477
00:23:57,760 --> 00:24:00,800
Speaker 5: I love spontaneity, and I am crying to busy body,

478
00:24:01,119 --> 00:24:03,760
Speaker 5: and so I always have to like make myself be

479
00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:06,640
Speaker 5: very intentional about how I'm spending my time and how

480
00:24:06,640 --> 00:24:11,360
Speaker 5: I'm spending my money. Made some very adult decisions when

481
00:24:11,400 --> 00:24:14,240
Speaker 5: it's come to my time and my money this year,

482
00:24:14,280 --> 00:24:18,399
Speaker 5: which don't always feel good in the moment, but you

483
00:24:18,520 --> 00:24:21,560
Speaker 5: got to pay the iris sometimes and so I don't

484
00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:23,959
Speaker 5: even know if that's spending your money intentionally, but like

485
00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:24,960
Speaker 5: you could choose not to.

486
00:24:25,560 --> 00:24:27,840
Speaker 4: So it's doing things you're like, Okay, you're taking care

487
00:24:27,840 --> 00:24:30,439
Speaker 4: of your future future self.

488
00:24:30,640 --> 00:24:33,760
Speaker 5: I do wish I like stepped into my care in

489
00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:36,399
Speaker 5: other ways though this year, Like you know, whenever you

490
00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:38,200
Speaker 5: get a massage, you're like, I should do this more,

491
00:24:38,640 --> 00:24:40,879
Speaker 5: and then I don't do it again for six months.

492
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:42,119
Speaker 4: So I want to do more of that.

493
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:47,960
Speaker 3: But yeah, I'd say this year was about maintaining for me.

494
00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:51,399
Speaker 3: I felt like in twenty twenty four I established a

495
00:24:51,400 --> 00:24:54,040
Speaker 3: lot of good habits and.

496
00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:56,280
Speaker 2: Had like a very consistent routine.

497
00:24:56,440 --> 00:24:59,000
Speaker 3: So this was about maintaining that, and I think I

498
00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:02,520
Speaker 3: did that pretty well. I also am someone who like

499
00:25:02,600 --> 00:25:05,159
Speaker 3: will over evaluate my routine and sometimes I'm like, I

500
00:25:05,240 --> 00:25:08,040
Speaker 3: just have to let it work. So having periods where

501
00:25:08,160 --> 00:25:11,919
Speaker 3: I wasn't planning, I think I was very successful at that.

502
00:25:12,760 --> 00:25:14,640
Speaker 3: I told myself in twenty twenty five, I wanted to.

503
00:25:14,640 --> 00:25:17,760
Speaker 2: Travel more and I was like, okay, I did that.

504
00:25:19,200 --> 00:25:23,520
Speaker 3: I had come to the realization that some weekends I

505
00:25:23,600 --> 00:25:27,320
Speaker 3: was spending the amount on a flight, and I'm like,

506
00:25:28,480 --> 00:25:30,960
Speaker 3: just stop going out as much. And it wasn't even

507
00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:33,919
Speaker 3: like partying or doing anything crazy, but the amount of

508
00:25:33,920 --> 00:25:36,040
Speaker 3: things that you just can do in a weekend.

509
00:25:36,640 --> 00:25:39,240
Speaker 2: And so I've been enjoying my rent in twenty twenty

510
00:25:39,280 --> 00:25:42,760
Speaker 2: five and I'm very glad that I've been doing that.

511
00:25:43,119 --> 00:25:46,080
Speaker 3: But also I think I've gotten to know myself, Like

512
00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:48,200
Speaker 3: I've read a lot more in twenty twenty.

513
00:25:47,920 --> 00:25:50,600
Speaker 2: Five, probably watch more movies than any other year.

514
00:25:50,760 --> 00:25:54,639
Speaker 3: I have AMC Stubbs and the Alamo Draft House subscription,

515
00:25:55,960 --> 00:25:58,280
Speaker 3: and like, yes, it's spending money, but it's like an

516
00:25:58,359 --> 00:26:01,760
Speaker 3: initial investment once a month spend Sometimes I don't give

517
00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:05,520
Speaker 3: food at the theater, so no money. But I feel

518
00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:07,840
Speaker 3: like I've taken more time in twenty twenty five just

519
00:26:07,880 --> 00:26:10,720
Speaker 3: to have like not necessarily fun, but.

520
00:26:10,600 --> 00:26:12,679
Speaker 4: Like pleasure, to be a lot more slow.

521
00:26:13,640 --> 00:26:16,680
Speaker 3: And sometimes I think with the things that I want

522
00:26:16,720 --> 00:26:18,200
Speaker 3: to do, I'm like, okay, it needs to be done

523
00:26:18,200 --> 00:26:19,840
Speaker 3: in a month two months. A lot of things this

524
00:26:19,920 --> 00:26:24,119
Speaker 3: year have been done over like six seven, eight months

525
00:26:24,119 --> 00:26:28,639
Speaker 3: a quarter and so balance, like remembering it's a marathon

526
00:26:28,720 --> 00:26:32,280
Speaker 3: not a sprint was a big goal of mine for twenty.

527
00:26:32,040 --> 00:26:33,800
Speaker 2: Twenty five than I think I successfully did.

528
00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:36,560
Speaker 3: Like my apartment, it wasn't going to be done within

529
00:26:36,600 --> 00:26:38,760
Speaker 3: the month of when I moved in. There's still stuff

530
00:26:38,760 --> 00:26:41,879
Speaker 3: that I'm being now my fitness journey, Like, yes, I

531
00:26:41,880 --> 00:26:45,679
Speaker 3: can see gains and improvements in a month, but like

532
00:26:45,880 --> 00:26:49,320
Speaker 3: it's what I do after that month that matters. Taking

533
00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:53,399
Speaker 3: away some of the instant gratification that I was used to.

534
00:26:54,600 --> 00:26:58,000
Speaker 3: I think that has been very successful for me. Something

535
00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:00,679
Speaker 3: I would love to do better is they said some

536
00:27:00,760 --> 00:27:04,960
Speaker 3: of the I don't want to say more traditional self care,

537
00:27:05,080 --> 00:27:08,080
Speaker 3: but like I'm not really a facial person. I maybe

538
00:27:08,119 --> 00:27:11,760
Speaker 3: get a massage like twice a year, and so doing

539
00:27:11,800 --> 00:27:16,240
Speaker 3: those other things that feel like luxuries, but I think

540
00:27:16,240 --> 00:27:18,240
Speaker 3: they feel like luxuries. Well they are a luxury, but

541
00:27:18,600 --> 00:27:20,880
Speaker 3: they don't have to feel like as big as an event.

542
00:27:20,680 --> 00:27:23,680
Speaker 2: If I just did them more often. So I think

543
00:27:23,720 --> 00:27:26,480
Speaker 2: that's what I'm thinking about in twenty twenty six.

544
00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:30,639
Speaker 5: The reason why I said that is because we have

545
00:27:30,880 --> 00:27:34,160
Speaker 5: our week off here and I was like I'm gonna do.

546
00:27:34,359 --> 00:27:36,239
Speaker 5: I was like, I'm gonna do so much, and I

547
00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:39,480
Speaker 5: did find myself programming a little too hard. But one

548
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:41,520
Speaker 5: thing I did was I went to the Korean Spa

549
00:27:41,720 --> 00:27:45,600
Speaker 5: for the first time, where you're like completely naked in.

550
00:27:45,560 --> 00:27:48,240
Speaker 4: His them room Sana Jukuzzi.

551
00:27:48,760 --> 00:27:51,680
Speaker 5: I got a full body scrub, you eat, you can

552
00:27:51,800 --> 00:27:56,200
Speaker 5: sit under a million led like it is just so relaxing,

553
00:27:56,640 --> 00:27:59,119
Speaker 5: and I was like, I need to do this at

554
00:27:59,200 --> 00:28:02,080
Speaker 5: least some month because, like you just I was spent

555
00:28:02,160 --> 00:28:04,880
Speaker 5: like five hours in there and it felt like a treat.

556
00:28:04,960 --> 00:28:07,959
Speaker 5: It's obviously not something I'm gonna do every week, but

557
00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:10,240
Speaker 5: it did something I want to like normalize. So if

558
00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:11,919
Speaker 5: you haven't been to the Korean Spot, I had a

559
00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:14,320
Speaker 5: great time. I had a blast, and I feel like

560
00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:18,480
Speaker 5: time stopped. And I feel like I definitely like to

561
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:20,640
Speaker 5: do things for time stops, because in my brain, time

562
00:28:20,760 --> 00:28:21,520
Speaker 5: is never stopping.

563
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:23,199
Speaker 1: Anything to add for you.

564
00:28:23,320 --> 00:28:24,800
Speaker 7: Terry, No, not really.

565
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:27,719
Speaker 6: I think that besides the taking care of yourself, like

566
00:28:27,840 --> 00:28:33,320
Speaker 6: doing pleasure all that jazz, I've been consistent, I'm probably

567
00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:35,480
Speaker 6: letting something go in twenty twenty five. I just haven't

568
00:28:35,480 --> 00:28:37,680
Speaker 6: figured out what it is yet. But I'm very much

569
00:28:37,760 --> 00:28:41,000
Speaker 6: joining that woman on her staircase and dropping some things behind.

570
00:28:41,080 --> 00:28:44,959
Speaker 1: So I love that meme so much. I look always

571
00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:46,680
Speaker 1: at her coming back at the end of every year

572
00:28:47,600 --> 00:28:48,240
Speaker 1: she lives on.

573
00:28:48,880 --> 00:28:49,840
Speaker 4: She really does.

574
00:28:51,480 --> 00:29:03,440
Speaker 1: More from our conversation after the break, so, you know,

575
00:29:03,520 --> 00:29:05,640
Speaker 1: I feel like at several points, and even in this

576
00:29:05,680 --> 00:29:08,720
Speaker 1: conversation today, I have heard you all talk about like

577
00:29:09,200 --> 00:29:13,640
Speaker 1: just making decisions around finances and stepping into that stage

578
00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:15,600
Speaker 1: of your life where you're thinking about, oh, I really

579
00:29:15,600 --> 00:29:17,400
Speaker 1: got to be the adult in the room when like

580
00:29:17,480 --> 00:29:20,760
Speaker 1: pay attention to finances and irs stuff. And is there

581
00:29:20,800 --> 00:29:23,680
Speaker 1: anything that you feel like you've incorporated this year that

582
00:29:23,720 --> 00:29:26,040
Speaker 1: has allowed you to feel like maybe you had more

583
00:29:26,040 --> 00:29:29,920
Speaker 1: freedom around finances or make different decisions that you're proud

584
00:29:30,000 --> 00:29:31,680
Speaker 1: of related to finances.

585
00:29:32,440 --> 00:29:35,520
Speaker 5: I think one thing that was helpful for me, and

586
00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:39,320
Speaker 5: this is like a less tangible thing, is like genuinely

587
00:29:39,360 --> 00:29:42,360
Speaker 5: talking about finances with friends. Like one day my friends

588
00:29:42,400 --> 00:29:45,120
Speaker 5: and I were all it wasn't planned, but we were

589
00:29:45,160 --> 00:29:47,800
Speaker 5: all just kind of like sharing how much debt we

590
00:29:47,920 --> 00:29:50,960
Speaker 5: had like overall, and like what that looks like, and

591
00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:53,240
Speaker 5: no one was like in a crazy position. But I

592
00:29:53,240 --> 00:29:55,480
Speaker 5: feel like when it comes to just like getting your

593
00:29:55,520 --> 00:29:57,680
Speaker 5: finances and everything in order. It's just something that you

594
00:29:57,720 --> 00:30:02,280
Speaker 5: want to do quickly, like Ali said, and hearing other

595
00:30:02,360 --> 00:30:05,920
Speaker 5: people's approaches to those things and like how they take

596
00:30:05,960 --> 00:30:08,960
Speaker 5: care of them makes you like, okay, I'm being responsible.

597
00:30:09,040 --> 00:30:12,480
Speaker 5: Like I'm being responsible. You can't take on everything at once.

598
00:30:13,080 --> 00:30:16,480
Speaker 5: I am like newly talking to a financial planner because

599
00:30:16,480 --> 00:30:17,240
Speaker 5: I'm like, all right.

600
00:30:17,200 --> 00:30:21,240
Speaker 4: How you know goals, goals? How do we reach these goals?

601
00:30:21,240 --> 00:30:23,560
Speaker 5: And how do I make smart decisions and just take

602
00:30:23,560 --> 00:30:25,520
Speaker 5: advantage of the things I can take advantage of? So

603
00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:29,800
Speaker 5: when I'm sixty, I'm not like what So I think

604
00:30:29,840 --> 00:30:31,719
Speaker 5: those have been the things for me and just like

605
00:30:32,480 --> 00:30:33,600
Speaker 5: just continuing to.

606
00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:34,920
Speaker 4: Look at what I have going on.

607
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:37,440
Speaker 5: There have been moments, especially in my twenties, so I

608
00:30:37,480 --> 00:30:38,360
Speaker 5: was like, I've been looked at.

609
00:30:38,240 --> 00:30:40,080
Speaker 4: My big account of two weeks. I don't know what's

610
00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:42,480
Speaker 4: going on in there, but it is my business.

611
00:30:42,480 --> 00:30:44,520
Speaker 5: There's no one else's business. It's definitely mine though. But

612
00:30:44,680 --> 00:30:46,760
Speaker 5: if it's not my business, then like what are we doing?

613
00:30:47,160 --> 00:30:50,120
Speaker 5: So I feel like a lot better just like checking

614
00:30:50,160 --> 00:30:51,880
Speaker 5: in and just.

615
00:30:51,800 --> 00:30:54,160
Speaker 4: Like talking about it.

616
00:30:54,280 --> 00:30:55,960
Speaker 5: I feel like when it's all in your head, it's

617
00:30:56,000 --> 00:31:00,520
Speaker 5: like a lot easier to forgive your own misgiving. But

618
00:31:00,560 --> 00:31:03,680
Speaker 5: when you're talking about it and you're just talking about it,

619
00:31:03,720 --> 00:31:06,400
Speaker 5: like you're talking about the weather, it's easier to kind

620
00:31:06,400 --> 00:31:07,760
Speaker 5: of create some structure around it.

621
00:31:09,480 --> 00:31:11,880
Speaker 6: This one's interesting for me because we started this year

622
00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:14,200
Speaker 6: our January Jumpstar. One of the episodes was with Amy

623
00:31:14,240 --> 00:31:18,920
Speaker 6: Griffin about estate planning, and it opened some like threads

624
00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:23,920
Speaker 6: to me personally about how I've looked at money and

625
00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:27,600
Speaker 6: like wealth and community traditionally. And I think growing up

626
00:31:27,640 --> 00:31:30,560
Speaker 6: in like a large family, having so many siblings, like

627
00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:32,560
Speaker 6: if there was a field trip that I went on

628
00:31:32,720 --> 00:31:35,640
Speaker 6: wanted to go on that cost twenty dollars, I've always

629
00:31:35,680 --> 00:31:39,040
Speaker 6: had to evaluate did my parents have success of twenty

630
00:31:39,080 --> 00:31:40,760
Speaker 6: dollars so that we could all go on the field trip?

631
00:31:40,920 --> 00:31:42,360
Speaker 6: And if I didn't think that they could, then I

632
00:31:42,360 --> 00:31:46,160
Speaker 6: wouldn't ask because it was it was impossible. And I

633
00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:48,640
Speaker 6: think I carried that sort of like community mindset of

634
00:31:48,720 --> 00:31:51,800
Speaker 6: like my money is our money. I can't afford to

635
00:31:51,800 --> 00:31:55,040
Speaker 6: do this because inevitably someone's going to need money, and

636
00:31:55,080 --> 00:31:56,840
Speaker 6: so I need to make sure that I'm saving it

637
00:31:56,920 --> 00:31:59,640
Speaker 6: so that when this person needs it, I'll be able

638
00:31:59,680 --> 00:32:03,479
Speaker 6: to have it. And that episode that we did with

639
00:32:03,520 --> 00:32:06,520
Speaker 6: Amy Griffin got me more and so into thinking that, no,

640
00:32:06,720 --> 00:32:09,360
Speaker 6: this is your life and your money and what you

641
00:32:09,440 --> 00:32:11,400
Speaker 6: leave behind is what you leave behind, but this is

642
00:32:11,400 --> 00:32:14,200
Speaker 6: what you're supposed to live with, and like learning more

643
00:32:14,320 --> 00:32:17,720
Speaker 6: so how to think of like my finances as being

644
00:32:17,880 --> 00:32:19,880
Speaker 6: just for me. And then especially because I went into

645
00:32:19,880 --> 00:32:22,440
Speaker 6: the year saying we're going to pursue some pleasure. Pleasure,

646
00:32:22,480 --> 00:32:26,520
Speaker 6: ain't cheat, So I had to, you know, get get

647
00:32:26,560 --> 00:32:29,840
Speaker 6: more comfortable with just like spending on myself, which probably

648
00:32:29,880 --> 00:32:33,640
Speaker 6: sounds insane to people who know me, but definitely just

649
00:32:33,720 --> 00:32:35,080
Speaker 6: reframed my mind around that.

650
00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:39,760
Speaker 5: You sound like all capricorns and not even like literally

651
00:32:39,840 --> 00:32:45,320
Speaker 5: capricorns are so like my money is very black and white.

652
00:32:46,200 --> 00:32:50,400
Speaker 6: Yeah, we added a little splash of tope in there

653
00:32:50,520 --> 00:32:50,960
Speaker 6: this year.

654
00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:52,680
Speaker 7: We'll see if you can make it the full color.

655
00:32:54,160 --> 00:32:57,200
Speaker 3: My mom is a Capricorn, and I can definitely see

656
00:32:57,240 --> 00:33:00,960
Speaker 3: that in her. There are such a giving people, and

657
00:33:01,040 --> 00:33:03,120
Speaker 3: I appreciate that, but I'm like, you don't have to

658
00:33:03,120 --> 00:33:05,840
Speaker 3: think about other people in this situation right now, Like

659
00:33:05,920 --> 00:33:08,240
Speaker 3: it is your money, it's your time. I always have

660
00:33:08,280 --> 00:33:11,480
Speaker 3: to tell my mom that, even in planning like her birthday,

661
00:33:11,520 --> 00:33:12,680
Speaker 3: so time She'll be like, well, so and so it

662
00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:14,040
Speaker 3: doesn't eat this, and I'm like, well so and so

663
00:33:14,040 --> 00:33:19,280
Speaker 3: it doesn't have to come this is your birthday. But

664
00:33:19,360 --> 00:33:21,960
Speaker 3: that's such a good question, doctor Joy, And I agree

665
00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:25,440
Speaker 3: with Indy about looking at your money. I went out

666
00:33:26,200 --> 00:33:28,840
Speaker 3: and I'm like, oh my god, I don't even remember.

667
00:33:28,520 --> 00:33:29,440
Speaker 2: How much I spend.

668
00:33:29,760 --> 00:33:32,760
Speaker 3: And then I used to like have this anxiousness and

669
00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:35,920
Speaker 3: it's like the number isn't going to change whether you

670
00:33:35,920 --> 00:33:37,120
Speaker 3: look at it or not, so you might as well

671
00:33:37,200 --> 00:33:41,080
Speaker 3: just look at it, and then having a plan, even

672
00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:44,960
Speaker 3: though plans change every week. I do my budget and

673
00:33:45,000 --> 00:33:46,560
Speaker 3: I look at my budget and I say, how much

674
00:33:46,680 --> 00:33:47,080
Speaker 3: am I going.

675
00:33:47,040 --> 00:33:47,800
Speaker 2: To spend this weekend?

676
00:33:48,960 --> 00:33:51,840
Speaker 3: Down to like, yes, I have Macha at home, I

677
00:33:51,840 --> 00:33:52,840
Speaker 3: have all the things at home.

678
00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:56,240
Speaker 2: Am I gonna buy one outside sometime this week?

679
00:33:56,680 --> 00:33:59,520
Speaker 3: And I do think just looking at it at that

680
00:33:59,600 --> 00:34:02,240
Speaker 3: frequent and then trying to have a budget.

681
00:34:02,320 --> 00:34:05,440
Speaker 2: I celebrated like my five year homecoming, and I.

682
00:34:05,400 --> 00:34:07,640
Speaker 3: Was like, Okay, I'm gonna spend three hundred dollars this weekend,

683
00:34:08,000 --> 00:34:09,560
Speaker 3: and I spent less than three hundred dollars.

684
00:34:09,600 --> 00:34:12,120
Speaker 2: But having that goal and just like.

685
00:34:13,560 --> 00:34:16,880
Speaker 3: Having the money set aside well ahead of time, but

686
00:34:16,920 --> 00:34:20,240
Speaker 3: then also being able to go out and just know like, Okay,

687
00:34:20,239 --> 00:34:21,719
Speaker 3: I have a bit of a cushion here, Like I

688
00:34:21,719 --> 00:34:25,600
Speaker 3: wouldn't spend three hundred dollars on a normal day out,

689
00:34:25,840 --> 00:34:28,040
Speaker 3: but I could because I planned for it. And I

690
00:34:28,080 --> 00:34:31,040
Speaker 3: think you're able to plan when you understand your cash

691
00:34:31,080 --> 00:34:35,560
Speaker 3: flow a lot better. Something that I find that I

692
00:34:35,560 --> 00:34:37,880
Speaker 3: did last year that actually stopped doing this here was

693
00:34:38,280 --> 00:34:40,080
Speaker 3: I hope they don't want to sponsor the podcast, but

694
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:44,120
Speaker 3: there were what was it the APF rocket. I used

695
00:34:44,120 --> 00:34:46,960
Speaker 3: to use it, and I felt that it did make

696
00:34:47,040 --> 00:34:52,279
Speaker 3: me lazy and understanding my own finances. Yes they track

697
00:34:52,320 --> 00:34:56,680
Speaker 3: your subscriptions, and yes it's easy, but it kind of

698
00:34:56,680 --> 00:34:58,760
Speaker 3: felt like I was still putting it in someone else's

699
00:34:58,760 --> 00:35:02,560
Speaker 3: hands and I wasn't as intimate. But I also felt like, oh,

700
00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:06,520
Speaker 3: because I'm tracking it, it's fine, but it didn't feel like, Okay.

701
00:35:06,280 --> 00:35:10,720
Speaker 2: I actually know. And now I feel.

702
00:35:10,560 --> 00:35:12,120
Speaker 3: Just a lot smarter about my money now that I

703
00:35:12,160 --> 00:35:15,440
Speaker 3: do with myself like pen and paper or like notes,

704
00:35:15,520 --> 00:35:19,000
Speaker 3: app Excel, spreadsheet. The fact that I have control over it.

705
00:35:19,400 --> 00:35:21,800
Speaker 3: This is not like anti AI or anything.

706
00:35:22,160 --> 00:35:24,080
Speaker 2: I appreciate that part.

707
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:27,719
Speaker 3: Of it, but you know, something I saw her name

708
00:35:27,760 --> 00:35:32,360
Speaker 3: is Melody, like Georgia Lucas's wife. I've got his cousin Hoopson.

709
00:35:32,520 --> 00:35:36,400
Speaker 2: Yes. Something she had said was children need to see

710
00:35:36,440 --> 00:35:40,440
Speaker 2: physical cash because they don't have the.

711
00:35:40,440 --> 00:35:43,320
Speaker 3: Concept of money coming in and money coming out. And

712
00:35:43,480 --> 00:35:45,680
Speaker 3: when I was a kid, if I had a debit

713
00:35:45,680 --> 00:35:48,040
Speaker 3: card that my parents would like put like sixty hours

714
00:35:48,080 --> 00:35:51,200
Speaker 3: a month on for allowance, but everything I bought, for

715
00:35:51,280 --> 00:35:53,680
Speaker 3: the most part, was physical cash, like if I went

716
00:35:53,719 --> 00:35:54,520
Speaker 3: on a field trip.

717
00:35:55,040 --> 00:35:57,480
Speaker 2: And I think maybe we've lost.

718
00:35:57,200 --> 00:35:59,200
Speaker 3: A little bit of that in adulthood, and so being

719
00:35:59,200 --> 00:36:04,879
Speaker 3: able to use excel, pen and paper sometimes I'll even

720
00:36:04,880 --> 00:36:06,960
Speaker 3: have like post it notes like this is how much

721
00:36:07,239 --> 00:36:09,359
Speaker 3: you're spending on this this week. I think that has

722
00:36:09,560 --> 00:36:12,680
Speaker 3: replaced how cash used to work in my life. And

723
00:36:12,680 --> 00:36:14,560
Speaker 3: so I really found her saying that to be like

724
00:36:14,600 --> 00:36:18,600
Speaker 3: really important and I'm honestly like transformational for me. So

725
00:36:18,760 --> 00:36:20,839
Speaker 3: the more tactile I've been with my money, I think,

726
00:36:20,880 --> 00:36:25,040
Speaker 3: the better I've spent it. And even like I went

727
00:36:25,080 --> 00:36:27,560
Speaker 3: to ATM yesterday to get money for my house cleaner,

728
00:36:27,920 --> 00:36:30,000
Speaker 3: and it's like when you see two hundred.

729
00:36:29,760 --> 00:36:33,640
Speaker 2: Dollars leave bait I physically come out. That's when dollars

730
00:36:33,719 --> 00:36:35,719
Speaker 2: is real, Okay, that's not twohen dollars.

731
00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:37,200
Speaker 4: That norsers rack you just right.

732
00:36:41,360 --> 00:36:42,239
Speaker 2: So yeah, I.

733
00:36:42,120 --> 00:36:44,040
Speaker 3: Think that if I like had to give a piece

734
00:36:44,040 --> 00:36:46,959
Speaker 3: of advice, I'm like, I would say, you know, most

735
00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:49,319
Speaker 3: banks have a tracking within the bank, so I don't

736
00:36:49,360 --> 00:36:51,319
Speaker 3: think you need these extra apps. I think you need

737
00:36:51,719 --> 00:36:55,000
Speaker 3: pen and paper and sell spreadsheet. You can even use

738
00:36:55,080 --> 00:36:58,360
Speaker 3: tat GPT and put like all of your like, oh okay,

739
00:36:58,440 --> 00:37:00,920
Speaker 3: these are the bills I have this week, and it

740
00:37:00,960 --> 00:37:02,960
Speaker 3: can give you information. But I think the more you're

741
00:37:03,000 --> 00:37:05,879
Speaker 3: able to do that on your own, it does help

742
00:37:05,920 --> 00:37:07,120
Speaker 3: the way you look at your money.

743
00:37:07,800 --> 00:37:11,760
Speaker 5: If anyone has a budget spreadsheet or something that they recommend,

744
00:37:11,840 --> 00:37:13,640
Speaker 5: let me know, because I feel like my system is

745
00:37:13,680 --> 00:37:18,360
Speaker 5: not sophisticated enough and it's not automated whatsoever, So you know,

746
00:37:19,600 --> 00:37:20,279
Speaker 5: send them my way.

747
00:37:20,600 --> 00:37:24,919
Speaker 1: You need some assistance in that area, so at least

748
00:37:24,960 --> 00:37:26,680
Speaker 1: you know. I feel like some of your comments are

749
00:37:26,760 --> 00:37:29,400
Speaker 1: a perfect setup for my next question, which is around

750
00:37:29,520 --> 00:37:33,279
Speaker 1: the propaganda that you are not falling for anymore. So

751
00:37:33,280 --> 00:37:35,279
Speaker 1: a part of what you were talking about is like, oh,

752
00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:38,239
Speaker 1: automate everything, right, Like I really want to be more

753
00:37:38,320 --> 00:37:42,120
Speaker 1: tactile with my money. So what propaganda are you leaving

754
00:37:42,120 --> 00:37:45,239
Speaker 1: in twenty twenty five, what are you no longer falling for.

755
00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:49,239
Speaker 2: I can't lie like I'm an ambitious person, like I

756
00:37:49,280 --> 00:37:49,800
Speaker 2: have goals.

757
00:37:49,800 --> 00:37:51,640
Speaker 3: With snims, you don't have to have a goal like

758
00:37:51,760 --> 00:37:54,440
Speaker 3: you can. It's okay to just be out your own vibes.

759
00:37:54,600 --> 00:37:57,319
Speaker 3: Sometimes I think we need more people who are.

760
00:37:57,320 --> 00:38:03,480
Speaker 2: Just experiencing life. Like I think, especially when you're on

761
00:38:03,520 --> 00:38:07,480
Speaker 2: social media, it can be extremely overwhelming seeing the amount

762
00:38:07,520 --> 00:38:10,880
Speaker 2: of content that's like how to plan this, how to

763
00:38:11,000 --> 00:38:15,319
Speaker 2: do xyz. I'm not I'm kind of against that, Like

764
00:38:15,360 --> 00:38:19,000
Speaker 2: I miss the error. I like vlogs. I like just

765
00:38:19,080 --> 00:38:20,439
Speaker 2: seeing people go about their day.

766
00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:22,799
Speaker 3: I guess like for some people, cooking is a goal,

767
00:38:22,840 --> 00:38:26,560
Speaker 3: but I like things that don't feel like, yes, there

768
00:38:26,560 --> 00:38:28,960
Speaker 3: are skills that can compound, but they don't feel I

769
00:38:28,960 --> 00:38:31,680
Speaker 3: think we've professionalized our personal lives.

770
00:38:31,280 --> 00:38:32,160
Speaker 2: A little too much.

771
00:38:32,719 --> 00:38:36,399
Speaker 3: So I'm maybe not falling for that propaganda holy Like,

772
00:38:36,960 --> 00:38:39,280
Speaker 3: yes it works in some aspects, but in some aspects

773
00:38:39,320 --> 00:38:42,040
Speaker 3: it's like you're a human, and so I think that

774
00:38:42,160 --> 00:38:45,640
Speaker 3: is what I'm not falling for when I'm leaving behind

775
00:38:45,640 --> 00:38:48,759
Speaker 3: in twenty twenty six, It's kind of similar to what

776
00:38:48,800 --> 00:38:50,920
Speaker 3: at least was saying about decorating her apartment, because I

777
00:38:50,920 --> 00:38:52,440
Speaker 3: feel like I've experienced that this year.

778
00:38:52,360 --> 00:38:56,279
Speaker 5: Too, And I remember, like maybe two apartments ago, I

779
00:38:56,320 --> 00:38:58,000
Speaker 5: got in there and I was like, it needs to

780
00:38:58,000 --> 00:38:59,480
Speaker 5: look cut in here, and it needs to look cut

781
00:38:59,520 --> 00:39:02,880
Speaker 5: in here right now. And I just bought a bunch

782
00:39:02,920 --> 00:39:05,839
Speaker 5: of stuff, bought a bunch of like artwork that didn't

783
00:39:05,880 --> 00:39:09,840
Speaker 5: really mean anything but like was cute, And none of

784
00:39:09,880 --> 00:39:13,440
Speaker 5: that stuff is stuff I'm still using now. And so

785
00:39:14,000 --> 00:39:16,440
Speaker 5: I think I was so concerned with like how I

786
00:39:16,480 --> 00:39:19,480
Speaker 5: wanted things to feel in the moment that I did

787
00:39:19,520 --> 00:39:22,560
Speaker 5: not think about like how it feeling however longer, like

788
00:39:22,600 --> 00:39:25,320
Speaker 5: what it meant to me, or being able to look back,

789
00:39:25,719 --> 00:39:28,319
Speaker 5: you know, when I have a home and be like

790
00:39:28,800 --> 00:39:30,719
Speaker 5: I got this in this place and it's special to

791
00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:34,600
Speaker 5: me because and so I think that applies to not

792
00:39:34,760 --> 00:39:39,000
Speaker 5: only putting together your space, whether you're in an apartment

793
00:39:39,040 --> 00:39:41,120
Speaker 5: that you're paying rent at or a house or whatever,

794
00:39:41,600 --> 00:39:46,360
Speaker 5: but just like intentionality behind like how you're doing things.

795
00:39:46,360 --> 00:39:49,320
Speaker 5: I think, especially when you wanted a lot of things,

796
00:39:49,640 --> 00:39:51,960
Speaker 5: it can feel like you need to do those things fast.

797
00:39:52,960 --> 00:39:55,880
Speaker 5: And I think some things need to be done fast,

798
00:39:55,960 --> 00:40:03,000
Speaker 5: but bull dozing through creating stuff through just like learning

799
00:40:03,280 --> 00:40:06,759
Speaker 5: about yourself and what you like can kind of feel

800
00:40:06,800 --> 00:40:07,560
Speaker 5: like a disservice.

801
00:40:07,960 --> 00:40:10,200
Speaker 4: So I've just been kind of trying to.

802
00:40:12,080 --> 00:40:17,879
Speaker 5: Just like resist the urge to just make things turn

803
00:40:17,920 --> 00:40:18,840
Speaker 5: around very quickly.

804
00:40:20,120 --> 00:40:20,759
Speaker 4: That makes sense.

805
00:40:21,960 --> 00:40:23,560
Speaker 7: Slow and steady wins the race.

806
00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:27,120
Speaker 4: Okay, fortis ortis.

807
00:40:27,840 --> 00:40:31,440
Speaker 6: I have to The first one is I'm no longer

808
00:40:31,480 --> 00:40:36,680
Speaker 6: falling for the propaganda of or the optics of supporting

809
00:40:36,880 --> 00:40:41,600
Speaker 6: black owned I think that we keep getting finagled into

810
00:40:41,680 --> 00:40:45,000
Speaker 6: supporting things, and most recently it's been a thing that

811
00:40:45,040 --> 00:40:46,799
Speaker 6: I actually really think is cool, which is the Pierre

812
00:40:46,840 --> 00:40:49,440
Speaker 6: la Boor bag. Pierre Labor is a Haitian American designer

813
00:40:49,480 --> 00:40:55,800
Speaker 6: that makes these really intricate handmade mohair purses, and people

814
00:40:56,160 --> 00:40:58,880
Speaker 6: really go up for the quality and craftsmanship, and I

815
00:40:58,920 --> 00:41:02,600
Speaker 6: think that it's they're selling out like super fast, but

816
00:41:02,680 --> 00:41:05,879
Speaker 6: I don't think that they're selling out for the right reasons.

817
00:41:06,040 --> 00:41:07,719
Speaker 7: And that's kind of.

818
00:41:07,640 --> 00:41:11,200
Speaker 6: The thing where I'm trying to steady myself and encourage

819
00:41:11,239 --> 00:41:13,720
Speaker 6: other people to really look at the ways in which

820
00:41:14,440 --> 00:41:17,480
Speaker 6: we are supporting, you know, some of these black owned businesses.

821
00:41:18,000 --> 00:41:22,400
Speaker 6: Sometimes we're looking for an optic and it's like, sure,

822
00:41:22,640 --> 00:41:26,839
Speaker 6: I could buy Beyonce's latest fragrance. But if the goal

823
00:41:26,920 --> 00:41:29,680
Speaker 6: is to like stimulate black economies, I could get it

824
00:41:29,680 --> 00:41:32,320
Speaker 6: from the African shop and like that's actually doing more

825
00:41:32,800 --> 00:41:36,160
Speaker 6: for like my direct community. Then this other thing, so

826
00:41:36,520 --> 00:41:39,920
Speaker 6: looking at if we're really into the idea of supporting

827
00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:44,520
Speaker 6: black owned and wanting craftsmanship and one in quality, does

828
00:41:44,560 --> 00:41:47,279
Speaker 6: that exist in our communities, which I believe it does

829
00:41:47,840 --> 00:41:51,520
Speaker 6: in a way that isn't currently being platformed and focusing

830
00:41:51,520 --> 00:41:54,200
Speaker 6: more on that than just trying to be attached to

831
00:41:54,239 --> 00:41:57,280
Speaker 6: the thing that's featured in essence or going viral on TikTok.

832
00:41:57,840 --> 00:42:00,480
Speaker 6: And then the second thing is slip and your dec conditioner.

833
00:42:00,719 --> 00:42:02,839
Speaker 6: I don't think it works. I think that a good

834
00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:05,759
Speaker 6: deep conditioner needs to feel like it's already bonded to

835
00:42:05,800 --> 00:42:08,600
Speaker 6: your hair. And I just don't believe it. I don't

836
00:42:08,640 --> 00:42:10,960
Speaker 6: believe the curly Nikki tribe telling you about slip. I

837
00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:14,440
Speaker 6: think that big conditioner is tricking us out of our dollars.

838
00:42:14,960 --> 00:42:17,799
Speaker 7: And I'm gonna start I'm gonna stand behind that.

839
00:42:17,800 --> 00:42:22,080
Speaker 1: Okay, So then I feel like I gotta know, like

840
00:42:22,160 --> 00:42:24,080
Speaker 1: what deep conditioner are you loving? Men?

841
00:42:25,440 --> 00:42:25,680
Speaker 7: Okay?

842
00:42:25,719 --> 00:42:28,480
Speaker 6: I actually really do like the sacred deep conditioner, and

843
00:42:28,520 --> 00:42:31,040
Speaker 6: I think people are complaining that it doesn't have enough slip,

844
00:42:31,040 --> 00:42:32,759
Speaker 6: but like I said, I feel like it needs to be.

845
00:42:33,320 --> 00:42:35,279
Speaker 7: We're trying to do some cuticle pair right here.

846
00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:37,600
Speaker 2: Like a deep conditioner needs to have slip. It's on

847
00:42:37,719 --> 00:42:38,280
Speaker 2: is shampoo.

848
00:42:38,400 --> 00:42:40,839
Speaker 6: Yeah, it's like I'm going under the dryer and when

849
00:42:40,880 --> 00:42:42,959
Speaker 6: I come out, I want to like feel like there's

850
00:42:43,000 --> 00:42:45,080
Speaker 6: nothing to wash out, even though I'm still gonna do that,

851
00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:49,680
Speaker 6: Like that's that's what a good conditioner does. But we've

852
00:42:49,719 --> 00:42:51,120
Speaker 6: been lied to a lot around I.

853
00:42:51,080 --> 00:42:54,399
Speaker 7: Think that's we're still in an era of four Sea girl.

854
00:42:54,440 --> 00:42:58,080
Speaker 6: He's trying to look like Zendeia hair wise, and you know,

855
00:42:58,080 --> 00:42:59,799
Speaker 6: we got to work out of that slowly, so it's

856
00:42:59,800 --> 00:43:01,120
Speaker 6: a life long process.

857
00:43:02,640 --> 00:43:04,200
Speaker 5: I'm like, I'm trying to remember the last time I

858
00:43:04,239 --> 00:43:06,359
Speaker 5: used a conditioner that I felt like it was like

859
00:43:06,760 --> 00:43:09,680
Speaker 5: not like marrying with my hair. I don't know, but

860
00:43:09,760 --> 00:43:12,200
Speaker 5: maybe maybe my expectations are too low.

861
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:15,680
Speaker 2: But I'm just like, because I wouldn't want like a thinner,

862
00:43:15,920 --> 00:43:18,440
Speaker 2: I wouldn't want a conditioner with slip. Now that I

863
00:43:18,520 --> 00:43:22,200
Speaker 2: want a thick condition Yeah, that like cokes your hair.

864
00:43:23,760 --> 00:43:26,200
Speaker 7: Everyone's like it needs to have it needs to be dripping.

865
00:43:26,239 --> 00:43:27,720
Speaker 7: I'm like, no, I need.

866
00:43:30,800 --> 00:43:31,520
Speaker 2: Once. That's the point.

867
00:43:31,560 --> 00:43:32,520
Speaker 1: It's just no.

868
00:43:33,239 --> 00:43:33,359
Speaker 7: No.

869
00:43:33,520 --> 00:43:34,000
Speaker 2: I'll say.

870
00:43:34,160 --> 00:43:37,880
Speaker 5: The other light side of like the propaganda I'm not

871
00:43:37,920 --> 00:43:40,760
Speaker 5: falling for is everything being a sample sale.

872
00:43:41,239 --> 00:43:44,080
Speaker 4: We are using sample seale way too loosely.

873
00:43:44,120 --> 00:43:46,680
Speaker 5: And I say this while I'm wearing a shirt from

874
00:43:46,680 --> 00:43:48,840
Speaker 5: a sample sale, that it's not a sample sell price.

875
00:43:49,440 --> 00:43:51,200
Speaker 4: But that's another I guess I just got caught up

876
00:43:51,200 --> 00:43:51,680
Speaker 4: in the moment.

877
00:43:51,880 --> 00:43:53,919
Speaker 5: But I feel like everything is being called sample, sample,

878
00:43:54,120 --> 00:43:57,319
Speaker 5: sample sale because like it like sounds chicic, but no,

879
00:43:57,920 --> 00:44:02,920
Speaker 5: you are liquid dating old product that like at the

880
00:44:03,000 --> 00:44:05,839
Speaker 5: time you did not really care about quality as much

881
00:44:05,840 --> 00:44:07,200
Speaker 5: as you're trying to get rid of it and make

882
00:44:07,239 --> 00:44:10,520
Speaker 5: a quick buck. But these are not samples, and they're

883
00:44:10,640 --> 00:44:13,920
Speaker 5: you know, I think, like everybody is calling things a sample,

884
00:44:13,960 --> 00:44:16,120
Speaker 5: so you should really just call it a sale or

885
00:44:16,160 --> 00:44:17,160
Speaker 5: call it clearance.

886
00:44:17,520 --> 00:44:21,360
Speaker 4: But clearance doesn't sound as sexy, and so that's propaganda.

887
00:44:21,360 --> 00:44:26,600
Speaker 1: I'm not falling for. More from our conversation after the break,

888
00:44:36,320 --> 00:44:38,400
Speaker 1: I don't know that I ever fail for this propaganda,

889
00:44:38,440 --> 00:44:41,479
Speaker 1: but I really want to leave it. In twenty twenty five,

890
00:44:41,680 --> 00:44:45,880
Speaker 1: this idea of cutting people off very quickly, right, So

891
00:44:45,960 --> 00:44:49,960
Speaker 1: any disagreement, any tension, any conflict automatically means that I

892
00:44:50,000 --> 00:44:53,239
Speaker 1: need to protect my peace and leave this relationship where

893
00:44:53,320 --> 00:44:55,280
Speaker 1: it is. And I feel like we do that way

894
00:44:55,320 --> 00:44:57,080
Speaker 1: too often, or at least I see a lot of

895
00:44:57,080 --> 00:45:00,319
Speaker 1: conversation around it that makes me very uncomfortable because it

896
00:45:00,320 --> 00:45:04,360
Speaker 1: feels like people are not actually practicing good relationship skills

897
00:45:04,360 --> 00:45:07,640
Speaker 1: but instead just running to avoid conflict. And I really

898
00:45:07,640 --> 00:45:09,640
Speaker 1: want us to get more comfortable just being in the

899
00:45:09,680 --> 00:45:13,240
Speaker 1: messy middle with people, because that is where relationships flourish.

900
00:45:13,360 --> 00:45:15,680
Speaker 1: So that's the propaganda I'm not falling for.

901
00:45:17,080 --> 00:45:18,560
Speaker 7: That's a good one plus one to that.

902
00:45:18,800 --> 00:45:22,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, So I feel like we cannot have a conversation

903
00:45:22,640 --> 00:45:26,719
Speaker 1: with this group in specific without hearing some of your

904
00:45:26,800 --> 00:45:29,839
Speaker 1: best of the year. So Lisa has already told us

905
00:45:29,840 --> 00:45:32,880
Speaker 1: that she has multiple movie house subscriptions. I know that

906
00:45:33,080 --> 00:45:35,759
Speaker 1: all of you frequent the movies and shows kind of

907
00:45:35,880 --> 00:45:39,919
Speaker 1: a lot. So what was your best film of twenty

908
00:45:40,000 --> 00:45:40,600
Speaker 1: twenty five?

909
00:45:41,440 --> 00:45:44,839
Speaker 3: I'll start because I have three and Off the Dome.

910
00:45:45,920 --> 00:45:48,680
Speaker 3: The first two to me are like equally as great

911
00:45:48,760 --> 00:45:52,000
Speaker 3: for different reasons, but centers in one battle after another.

912
00:45:52,360 --> 00:45:55,080
Speaker 2: Both movies I've seen like five.

913
00:45:54,920 --> 00:45:59,200
Speaker 3: Times, like great films, and I appreciate that they were long.

914
00:45:59,280 --> 00:46:01,960
Speaker 3: I Thinkganda I'm not falling for and everything does not

915
00:46:02,200 --> 00:46:05,319
Speaker 3: need to be short and digestible. Okay, And so I

916
00:46:05,480 --> 00:46:08,799
Speaker 3: just watched Centers this weekend, and I also watched One

917
00:46:08,800 --> 00:46:10,960
Speaker 3: Battle after Another again and I was like, Wow, these

918
00:46:10,960 --> 00:46:15,200
Speaker 3: are amazing films. So those aren't like like one and two.

919
00:46:16,280 --> 00:46:20,960
Speaker 3: You can play some however you want. This third was Twinless.

920
00:46:21,120 --> 00:46:22,840
Speaker 3: It was I wouldn't even say it was.

921
00:46:22,840 --> 00:46:26,359
Speaker 2: An indie film, but it had. I didn't watch Teen Wolf.

922
00:46:26,080 --> 00:46:28,280
Speaker 3: But the guy from Teen Wolf Dylan O'Brien, But basically

923
00:46:28,280 --> 00:46:29,680
Speaker 3: it's about a guy who loses his.

924
00:46:29,640 --> 00:46:30,000
Speaker 4: Twin and.

925
00:46:31,520 --> 00:46:36,080
Speaker 3: The friendship he forms after that. I thought it was

926
00:46:36,280 --> 00:46:39,120
Speaker 3: really good. It was very creepy for sure, but like

927
00:46:39,200 --> 00:46:41,200
Speaker 3: I cried during the film, and I thought the way

928
00:46:42,239 --> 00:46:44,160
Speaker 3: it portrayed grief was really great.

929
00:46:44,280 --> 00:46:46,000
Speaker 2: So it was definitely an underrated film.

930
00:46:46,040 --> 00:46:49,719
Speaker 3: And then there was another film called Lurker that I

931
00:46:49,760 --> 00:46:53,719
Speaker 3: really loved, another creepy film. I think this was in

932
00:46:53,800 --> 00:46:56,080
Speaker 3: terms of some of like the more indie, smaller films

933
00:46:56,080 --> 00:46:57,240
Speaker 3: that I saw this year.

934
00:46:57,440 --> 00:46:59,960
Speaker 2: A lot of them were creepy. But if I had

935
00:47:00,120 --> 00:47:01,520
Speaker 2: to tell people, like, what.

936
00:47:01,280 --> 00:47:05,839
Speaker 3: Was my twenty twenty five and films I'd say, one

937
00:47:05,880 --> 00:47:09,440
Speaker 3: battle after another, Sinners, Twinless, and Worker.

938
00:47:09,640 --> 00:47:11,160
Speaker 2: I loved those films.

939
00:47:11,440 --> 00:47:14,480
Speaker 4: That's a good one. I really enjoyed. I mean obviously Sinners.

940
00:47:14,520 --> 00:47:18,920
Speaker 5: I really enjoyed Lurker, Like Lurker made me feel so

941
00:47:18,120 --> 00:47:22,520
Speaker 5: track that soundtrack like everything, and it was just so like,

942
00:47:22,680 --> 00:47:27,479
Speaker 5: I feel like they really captured the dynamic of that

943
00:47:27,680 --> 00:47:31,160
Speaker 5: mysterious group around an artist so well.

944
00:47:31,200 --> 00:47:33,440
Speaker 4: I was like this person and they said the right,

945
00:47:33,440 --> 00:47:34,680
Speaker 4: I used to work in music. I think.

946
00:47:34,880 --> 00:47:39,000
Speaker 5: I was like, I can definitely tell because that like vibe.

947
00:47:39,080 --> 00:47:41,319
Speaker 5: I was like, yes, this is exactly what it feels like.

948
00:47:41,680 --> 00:47:42,640
Speaker 5: I'm trying to talk about it.

949
00:47:42,640 --> 00:47:44,760
Speaker 7: What that could be spoiled without spoiling.

950
00:47:44,360 --> 00:47:47,759
Speaker 4: You, I'll say, are we just talking movies? Are we

951
00:47:47,800 --> 00:47:49,920
Speaker 4: talking like? Are we gonna shift into category?

952
00:47:49,960 --> 00:47:52,759
Speaker 1: I't know, we just we don't have time to do

953
00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:53,719
Speaker 1: all the categories.

954
00:47:53,760 --> 00:47:56,239
Speaker 4: You're right, You're right. I'm like, we don't.

955
00:47:57,000 --> 00:48:00,520
Speaker 5: Definitely, Sinners takes the cake as number one on my

956
00:48:00,680 --> 00:48:04,160
Speaker 5: on my pyramid. If there have been two moments this

957
00:48:04,200 --> 00:48:06,320
Speaker 5: summer where a friend was like, I haven't seen Sinners,

958
00:48:06,360 --> 00:48:10,120
Speaker 5: I'm like, sit down, please, you're watching number widely. I

959
00:48:10,160 --> 00:48:12,160
Speaker 5: feel like I'm not doing a good job as a

960
00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:15,560
Speaker 5: friend if you haven't seen Sinners, and so Sinners might

961
00:48:15,600 --> 00:48:18,960
Speaker 5: be the movie that like finally makes me start collecting

962
00:48:19,000 --> 00:48:22,640
Speaker 5: movies in an analog way because I'm like, I need

963
00:48:22,680 --> 00:48:27,879
Speaker 5: to have things on tap when there's no Internet, all

964
00:48:27,920 --> 00:48:32,440
Speaker 5: of those things. So Sinners definitely. I also did Love

965
00:48:32,520 --> 00:48:36,200
Speaker 5: Went Battle after Another. I'll also add two others. I

966
00:48:36,239 --> 00:48:40,239
Speaker 5: really liked this movie called Together. It was like a

967
00:48:40,280 --> 00:48:44,840
Speaker 5: body horror and it was a very creepy movie. But

968
00:48:44,920 --> 00:48:47,880
Speaker 5: I feel like it explored doctor Joey. You'd probably have

969
00:48:47,960 --> 00:48:49,800
Speaker 5: some interesting therapy takes on it.

970
00:48:49,800 --> 00:48:51,440
Speaker 4: It explored Y.

971
00:48:52,960 --> 00:48:55,640
Speaker 5: Like in a very interesting way and in a literal

972
00:48:55,680 --> 00:48:58,840
Speaker 5: way in terms of the horror aspect. But Together was

973
00:48:58,880 --> 00:49:00,600
Speaker 5: just like I love a movie that like makes me

974
00:49:00,719 --> 00:49:02,839
Speaker 5: just feel weird, like I'm like on a ride at

975
00:49:02,880 --> 00:49:04,040
Speaker 5: Disney World or something.

976
00:49:04,160 --> 00:49:06,520
Speaker 2: And it was funny. It was funny. It's funny.

977
00:49:06,800 --> 00:49:08,880
Speaker 5: Yeah, it kind of like made fun of itself, and

978
00:49:08,920 --> 00:49:10,840
Speaker 5: I was like, oh, this was such a fun watch.

979
00:49:11,120 --> 00:49:14,800
Speaker 5: So I really enjoyed Together and a late Comer and

980
00:49:14,960 --> 00:49:18,040
Speaker 5: like movies that I really enjoyed. This year, Tessa Thompson

981
00:49:18,160 --> 00:49:22,840
Speaker 5: started a movie called hell yeah, yeah, yeah.

982
00:49:22,680 --> 00:49:24,120
Speaker 4: And it's directed by a black woman.

983
00:49:24,400 --> 00:49:27,800
Speaker 5: It's like shot beautifully, the pacing is really nice and

984
00:49:27,920 --> 00:49:30,799
Speaker 5: I and I do enjoy Tessa Thompson as an actress.

985
00:49:31,080 --> 00:49:32,600
Speaker 5: I wish I would have seen it in a theater

986
00:49:32,640 --> 00:49:34,480
Speaker 5: because I just think some things just need to be

987
00:49:34,600 --> 00:49:38,360
Speaker 5: on a big screen. But Heta was like, you know,

988
00:49:38,400 --> 00:49:44,200
Speaker 5: it's kind of Tessa Thompson plays like a complex black

989
00:49:44,200 --> 00:49:46,080
Speaker 5: woman who's like kind of villainous.

990
00:49:46,320 --> 00:49:49,880
Speaker 4: But I just enjoy seeing that on screen.

991
00:49:50,120 --> 00:49:52,160
Speaker 5: And I also love a movie that takes place in

992
00:49:52,200 --> 00:49:55,520
Speaker 5: one setting, Like the entirety of it happens at a party,

993
00:49:56,040 --> 00:49:59,920
Speaker 5: and so I love just exploring so many things that

994
00:50:00,000 --> 00:50:02,359
Speaker 5: can be happening at one time in that Sking.

995
00:50:02,440 --> 00:50:04,839
Speaker 4: I think that's on Amazon Prime and I really enjoyed it,

996
00:50:04,880 --> 00:50:07,080
Speaker 4: and I'm like, somebody needs to put this on a

997
00:50:07,320 --> 00:50:09,359
Speaker 4: movie screen. So those are my.

998
00:50:09,360 --> 00:50:12,400
Speaker 7: Phaves definitely plus one Aheada.

999
00:50:12,640 --> 00:50:15,040
Speaker 6: That was like one of the first plays I read

1000
00:50:15,080 --> 00:50:20,320
Speaker 6: in college, and seeing them artfully take on the addition

1001
00:50:20,400 --> 00:50:24,160
Speaker 6: of race into that storytelling was great. I'm not a

1002
00:50:24,200 --> 00:50:27,359
Speaker 6: big fan of Tessa Thompson's acting, so I was very

1003
00:50:27,440 --> 00:50:30,960
Speaker 6: impressed to see her in that role. Another thing that

1004
00:50:31,000 --> 00:50:33,799
Speaker 6: I really liked this year was Bougonia. I think Emma

1005
00:50:33,880 --> 00:50:37,560
Speaker 6: Stone is just making really strong acting choices. I know

1006
00:50:37,640 --> 00:50:41,520
Speaker 6: that there's some controversy around the portrayal of womanhood and

1007
00:50:41,600 --> 00:50:44,680
Speaker 6: her works and with her directing partner, but I don't

1008
00:50:44,680 --> 00:50:46,959
Speaker 6: know these these movies are getting me. I was also

1009
00:50:47,000 --> 00:50:49,839
Speaker 6: a big fan of Poor Things, so it just might

1010
00:50:49,880 --> 00:50:54,440
Speaker 6: be my genre. And then last, I mean Love Centers.

1011
00:50:54,480 --> 00:50:57,160
Speaker 6: Of course, I was actually not as big of a

1012
00:50:57,200 --> 00:50:59,279
Speaker 6: fan of one battle after another. I think we could

1013
00:50:59,280 --> 00:51:02,120
Speaker 6: have taken forty five minutes out of the film, and

1014
00:51:02,200 --> 00:51:06,200
Speaker 6: I wish that both Tayana Taylor and Chase Infinity's characters

1015
00:51:06,239 --> 00:51:10,400
Speaker 6: had more of a full arc in their storytelling. The Mastermind,

1016
00:51:10,400 --> 00:51:12,520
Speaker 6: That's probably the last one I thought was like really good,

1017
00:51:13,400 --> 00:51:18,319
Speaker 6: even though I don't like Ham Ham. Who is Hame

1018
00:51:18,520 --> 00:51:21,440
Speaker 6: the uh one of the girls from ham the band.

1019
00:51:21,800 --> 00:51:24,680
Speaker 7: She was on Licorice Pizza. She's in this movie too,

1020
00:51:24,719 --> 00:51:27,640
Speaker 7: and I'm just like, I can't stand you, but this

1021
00:51:27,719 --> 00:51:28,279
Speaker 7: is all dude.

1022
00:51:28,360 --> 00:51:30,800
Speaker 5: Yeah, I can't say I get I get Hame.

1023
00:51:31,120 --> 00:51:33,840
Speaker 4: But I saw Licker and I did not enjoy that movie.

1024
00:51:34,160 --> 00:51:37,600
Speaker 7: I saw Liquorice piecea and I said, oh, this is oh.

1025
00:51:37,600 --> 00:51:41,960
Speaker 4: A little problematic. I was speaking liquors, Pizza, A Long Walk.

1026
00:51:42,280 --> 00:51:43,919
Speaker 2: With I haven't seen it.

1027
00:51:44,600 --> 00:51:46,440
Speaker 4: I've really enjoyed it.

1028
00:51:46,560 --> 00:51:50,239
Speaker 8: Like I heard mixed reviews and those same people who

1029
00:51:50,320 --> 00:51:54,240
Speaker 8: love that movie loved Weapons, And as someone who wants

1030
00:51:54,280 --> 00:51:59,560
Speaker 8: to have that movie scrubbed from all the streaming, I don't, no,

1031
00:51:59,640 --> 00:52:01,160
Speaker 8: I can't, I can't weave y'all me and you go

1032
00:52:01,200 --> 00:52:02,480
Speaker 8: see Weapons now.

1033
00:52:03,600 --> 00:52:06,400
Speaker 5: Weapons, I feel like was just like absurd, But I

1034
00:52:06,480 --> 00:52:08,200
Speaker 5: do enjoy absurdity.

1035
00:52:08,640 --> 00:52:10,200
Speaker 4: But I liked A Long Walk. I will say. The

1036
00:52:10,239 --> 00:52:12,600
Speaker 4: only thing is that And now I'm not I think

1037
00:52:12,760 --> 00:52:13,520
Speaker 4: his name is David.

1038
00:52:13,520 --> 00:52:16,799
Speaker 5: I'm forgetting the black man in the movie, the main

1039
00:52:17,520 --> 00:52:21,400
Speaker 5: lead who was in industry, who was in industry, yes exactly,

1040
00:52:21,560 --> 00:52:23,239
Speaker 5: Don Johnson or like.

1041
00:52:25,680 --> 00:52:28,200
Speaker 7: It's like it's a basic English name yet David exactly.

1042
00:52:28,719 --> 00:52:31,839
Speaker 5: I think he's a great actor, but his accent was

1043
00:52:31,880 --> 00:52:35,600
Speaker 5: fighting for his life in that movie, and like that's

1044
00:52:35,680 --> 00:52:37,520
Speaker 5: one thing I just could not get past. He was

1045
00:52:37,560 --> 00:52:40,960
Speaker 5: like from the South, and I was like distracted by

1046
00:52:41,120 --> 00:52:43,440
Speaker 5: his I don't know who his accent trainer was on

1047
00:52:43,480 --> 00:52:44,840
Speaker 5: that movie, but I have thoughts.

1048
00:52:45,120 --> 00:52:48,880
Speaker 4: But I did enjoy the movie, and what Seymour.

1049
00:52:48,480 --> 00:52:51,960
Speaker 5: I'm forgetting now I feel like Barbara on Avid Elementary.

1050
00:52:51,960 --> 00:52:54,959
Speaker 2: I can't remember anyone's name's son.

1051
00:52:55,480 --> 00:52:57,240
Speaker 4: Thank you. Yes, a good actor.

1052
00:52:57,320 --> 00:52:58,640
Speaker 2: He's a good actor.

1053
00:52:58,719 --> 00:53:00,400
Speaker 5: He is a good actor, and I don't know he

1054
00:53:00,480 --> 00:53:02,600
Speaker 5: was just when I was talking without liquorice pizza, and

1055
00:53:02,640 --> 00:53:04,160
Speaker 5: so of course there's like more press are out it.

1056
00:53:04,200 --> 00:53:05,600
Speaker 5: But he's a good actor. So I think they were

1057
00:53:05,680 --> 00:53:08,919
Speaker 5: a good pairing. But you should watch it. At least

1058
00:53:08,920 --> 00:53:09,319
Speaker 5: I enjoyed.

1059
00:53:11,280 --> 00:53:13,879
Speaker 1: I have not seen most of these things that y'all

1060
00:53:13,920 --> 00:53:19,440
Speaker 1: are talking about. Centers I think is shut out and

1061
00:53:19,520 --> 00:53:22,040
Speaker 1: I hear your I appreciate the takes on together. I've

1062
00:53:22,080 --> 00:53:24,120
Speaker 1: never heard of that, but it does not sound like

1063
00:53:24,160 --> 00:53:25,759
Speaker 1: something I will watch. But I feel like I might

1064
00:53:25,800 --> 00:53:28,160
Speaker 1: be curious now that y'all are saying it's funny, and

1065
00:53:28,239 --> 00:53:31,560
Speaker 1: also there may be some good like therapy takes, so

1066
00:53:31,600 --> 00:53:33,759
Speaker 1: I might actually brave that one and get back to

1067
00:53:33,920 --> 00:53:34,919
Speaker 1: all on it.

1068
00:53:35,840 --> 00:53:36,279
Speaker 4: Thank you.

1069
00:53:36,480 --> 00:53:38,520
Speaker 1: So we do not have time to go into all

1070
00:53:38,560 --> 00:53:40,279
Speaker 1: of our Oh, at least was there another one that

1071
00:53:40,280 --> 00:53:41,279
Speaker 1: you want to add to your list?

1072
00:53:41,600 --> 00:53:44,120
Speaker 3: Not a movie, but I did have an album that like,

1073
00:53:44,200 --> 00:53:47,920
Speaker 3: I cannot not talk about black Star.

1074
00:53:48,239 --> 00:53:50,200
Speaker 2: How do you say her name is?

1075
00:53:53,400 --> 00:53:56,560
Speaker 4: I say black Star Amre.

1076
00:53:57,000 --> 00:53:58,280
Speaker 2: I love that album.

1077
00:53:58,600 --> 00:54:02,040
Speaker 3: I think I wrote about this in my newsletter, but

1078
00:54:02,120 --> 00:54:07,000
Speaker 3: I felt like my issue with Charlie XCX's Brat, although

1079
00:54:07,040 --> 00:54:09,600
Speaker 3: I did like it, was that it felt like the

1080
00:54:09,719 --> 00:54:16,200
Speaker 3: Tumblr interpretation of like pop Indie Sly's like music, and.

1081
00:54:16,160 --> 00:54:17,000
Speaker 2: It wasn't bad.

1082
00:54:17,120 --> 00:54:20,160
Speaker 3: But what I love about Blackstar is that it pulls

1083
00:54:20,239 --> 00:54:25,480
Speaker 3: from dance scenes from across the diaspora, so like Brazil, Ghana,

1084
00:54:25,520 --> 00:54:27,880
Speaker 3: and so it feels like very studied.

1085
00:54:28,400 --> 00:54:30,880
Speaker 2: It's a great album, like the music is great, is

1086
00:54:30,920 --> 00:54:33,359
Speaker 2: great to dance. So I'm gonna go see her here

1087
00:54:33,400 --> 00:54:37,600
Speaker 2: in La. I'm very excited. But I really like how okay.

1088
00:54:38,080 --> 00:54:40,399
Speaker 3: I think people have won it not necessarily house music,

1089
00:54:40,440 --> 00:54:43,680
Speaker 3: but just like dance, like party music. This is that

1090
00:54:43,920 --> 00:54:46,520
Speaker 3: for twenty twenty five, twenty twenty six, and it's not

1091
00:54:46,680 --> 00:54:50,319
Speaker 3: borrowing from the past, although it references it. But then

1092
00:54:50,360 --> 00:54:52,480
Speaker 3: the feature is like Naomi Campbell's on the album Pink

1093
00:54:52,520 --> 00:54:56,160
Speaker 3: Panthers Charlie Wilson, and I was very shocked at that,

1094
00:54:56,320 --> 00:54:58,880
Speaker 3: for like, this is only her second album. I wouldn't

1095
00:54:58,880 --> 00:55:00,799
Speaker 3: say she's that big, so also the people she was

1096
00:55:00,840 --> 00:55:03,840
Speaker 3: able to get but it's actually her third album.

1097
00:55:03,920 --> 00:55:05,040
Speaker 4: But I loved it.

1098
00:55:05,080 --> 00:55:06,480
Speaker 2: I thought this was the best album of the year.

1099
00:55:06,800 --> 00:55:08,920
Speaker 1: So that's my look. Okay, so I feel like we

1100
00:55:08,960 --> 00:55:11,480
Speaker 1: got to give Indian Tyree their shot at album of

1101
00:55:11,520 --> 00:55:13,640
Speaker 1: the year since the least or if you want to

1102
00:55:13,680 --> 00:55:16,160
Speaker 1: do a separate category your best something, so it could

1103
00:55:16,160 --> 00:55:18,520
Speaker 1: be album or some other thing that you want to

1104
00:55:18,560 --> 00:55:19,279
Speaker 1: give out.

1105
00:55:19,880 --> 00:55:23,080
Speaker 5: Okay, feel very drawn and so I'm gonna say it.

1106
00:55:23,239 --> 00:55:29,280
Speaker 5: Olivia Dean's album. It's a fantastic album. It centers around

1107
00:55:29,400 --> 00:55:34,240
Speaker 5: like navigating breakup and like finding yourself after breakup whatever,

1108
00:55:34,640 --> 00:55:38,200
Speaker 5: and she is just like I know she co writes

1109
00:55:38,280 --> 00:55:41,080
Speaker 5: a lot of her songs, but she's just a great performer.

1110
00:55:41,560 --> 00:55:44,080
Speaker 5: It's a beautiful Like some albums, it's so hard to

1111
00:55:44,160 --> 00:55:46,440
Speaker 5: just pick one song and front to back.

1112
00:55:46,520 --> 00:55:49,680
Speaker 4: It's like finishing it and starting and finishing a book.

1113
00:55:50,280 --> 00:55:53,800
Speaker 5: And so that has just been consistently on a repeat

1114
00:55:53,840 --> 00:55:56,719
Speaker 5: since it came out. I bought the record and I

1115
00:55:56,800 --> 00:55:59,680
Speaker 5: got Thank you Goud tickets to see her next year.

1116
00:56:01,120 --> 00:56:04,200
Speaker 5: I'm very excited to see her. It's just been like,

1117
00:56:04,320 --> 00:56:07,520
Speaker 5: and I love any song that's like this is about

1118
00:56:07,560 --> 00:56:13,200
Speaker 5: my sadness. I'm like, yeah, so I feel like I

1119
00:56:13,200 --> 00:56:14,719
Speaker 5: have no choice, Like that's my my.

1120
00:56:14,680 --> 00:56:16,000
Speaker 4: Apple the year for sure.

1121
00:56:16,640 --> 00:56:23,400
Speaker 6: Okay, I don't know that I have a favorite anything yet.

1122
00:56:23,920 --> 00:56:27,279
Speaker 6: I just started listening to The Fall That Saved Us

1123
00:56:27,280 --> 00:56:30,480
Speaker 6: this morning by Odell, so that might be it. It's

1124
00:56:30,520 --> 00:56:33,400
Speaker 6: really it's really resonating with me. But nothing on the

1125
00:56:33,480 --> 00:56:36,680
Speaker 6: music front that's like this took over for me. Now

1126
00:56:36,800 --> 00:56:38,840
Speaker 6: next week when I look at my Apple music rapped,

1127
00:56:38,840 --> 00:56:40,239
Speaker 6: maybe I'll have different opinions.

1128
00:56:40,239 --> 00:56:43,160
Speaker 7: But yeah, is it Odell or Odell?

1129
00:56:43,440 --> 00:56:48,000
Speaker 6: I'm really okay. Odell and Destin Conrad.

1130
00:56:48,120 --> 00:56:50,399
Speaker 7: I think are doing a lot for me in terms

1131
00:56:50,440 --> 00:56:53,040
Speaker 7: of men saying R and B. So I'll give them.

1132
00:56:53,120 --> 00:56:53,920
Speaker 7: I'll give them there to this.

1133
00:56:54,160 --> 00:56:56,360
Speaker 4: Yeah, Leon Thomas as well, I have enjoyed.

1134
00:56:57,040 --> 00:56:59,480
Speaker 7: You know, he screwed up a couple of times.

1135
00:56:59,640 --> 00:57:04,040
Speaker 6: But aside from that, yes, you'll get an eight on

1136
00:57:04,080 --> 00:57:05,040
Speaker 6: the Richter scale.

1137
00:57:05,520 --> 00:57:08,920
Speaker 1: There you go. So one of my favorite things to

1138
00:57:09,000 --> 00:57:11,200
Speaker 1: do in the Therapy for Black Girls community is to

1139
00:57:11,239 --> 00:57:14,200
Speaker 1: offer permission slips at the end of the year. So

1140
00:57:14,280 --> 00:57:16,360
Speaker 1: I typically am talking about something like, you know, you

1141
00:57:16,360 --> 00:57:19,320
Speaker 1: have permission to make the holidays whatever you'd like. If

1142
00:57:19,360 --> 00:57:22,320
Speaker 1: you had a permission slip to offer to our community

1143
00:57:22,360 --> 00:57:24,640
Speaker 1: and our audience as they wrap up twenty twenty five

1144
00:57:24,640 --> 00:57:25,959
Speaker 1: and head into twenty twenty six.

1145
00:57:25,960 --> 00:57:27,320
Speaker 7: What would you be boo boom?

1146
00:57:27,360 --> 00:57:29,520
Speaker 6: Okay, I've been saying this to people a lot, So

1147
00:57:30,080 --> 00:57:32,880
Speaker 6: my permission slip would be to be an active participant

1148
00:57:32,960 --> 00:57:33,880
Speaker 6: in your own life.

1149
00:57:34,600 --> 00:57:35,400
Speaker 1: It's a good one.

1150
00:57:35,600 --> 00:57:38,720
Speaker 5: I'll say my permission slip would be that you have

1151
00:57:38,800 --> 00:57:42,200
Speaker 5: permission to be cocky drive to explain it.

1152
00:57:42,280 --> 00:57:46,560
Speaker 1: No, I feel like that is perfectly self Explainatoray.

1153
00:57:47,040 --> 00:57:51,800
Speaker 3: I'd say you have permission to be curious and deep.

1154
00:57:52,120 --> 00:57:56,040
Speaker 3: I will reply to people's Instagram stories with like very

1155
00:57:56,040 --> 00:57:57,800
Speaker 3: deep questions, so I'm like, why did you post that?

1156
00:57:57,920 --> 00:58:01,960
Speaker 3: And it's a social media network, so you have like

1157
00:58:02,080 --> 00:58:04,720
Speaker 3: not to be faux social, to be actually social.

1158
00:58:06,160 --> 00:58:08,240
Speaker 1: Okay, I feel like these are all very fitting of

1159
00:58:08,280 --> 00:58:13,160
Speaker 1: who I know you all to be. You think, I'll no, no, no,

1160
00:58:13,240 --> 00:58:15,720
Speaker 1: I love the wanting to step into it right and

1161
00:58:15,800 --> 00:58:18,080
Speaker 1: like talking to you right back up all the great

1162
00:58:18,080 --> 00:58:22,720
Speaker 1: things you've done. So remind the people where they can

1163
00:58:22,760 --> 00:58:26,480
Speaker 1: find Joe in Daywoo is your website and any socials

1164
00:58:26,520 --> 00:58:27,280
Speaker 1: that you want to share.

1165
00:58:28,320 --> 00:58:30,880
Speaker 5: My website is my first and last name, and day

1166
00:58:31,000 --> 00:58:36,040
Speaker 5: chewboo dot com and I am in day lassol on

1167
00:58:36,360 --> 00:58:37,560
Speaker 5: social platforms.

1168
00:58:38,000 --> 00:58:40,640
Speaker 4: I feel like mostly on Twitter, I'm like mostly a

1169
00:58:40,720 --> 00:58:44,320
Speaker 4: retweeter these days, are gotten a bit lazy sharing my

1170
00:58:44,360 --> 00:58:46,920
Speaker 4: thoughts on Twitter. So maybe I'll get back to that.

1171
00:58:47,000 --> 00:58:47,840
Speaker 4: But that's me.

1172
00:58:48,040 --> 00:58:50,120
Speaker 1: Have you met made the jump to threads yet I

1173
00:58:50,160 --> 00:58:51,720
Speaker 1: feel like I still don't see you there.

1174
00:58:51,960 --> 00:58:52,040
Speaker 2: No.

1175
00:58:52,520 --> 00:58:56,480
Speaker 5: I saw my Threads account and I was making threads

1176
00:58:56,520 --> 00:58:58,080
Speaker 5: posting like twenty twenty three.

1177
00:58:58,960 --> 00:59:00,640
Speaker 4: Usually I go on thread it's when.

1178
00:59:00,480 --> 00:59:04,840
Speaker 5: Instagram like promotes those little things, that little carousel. But

1179
00:59:04,920 --> 00:59:06,880
Speaker 5: I never think to write anything on threats. But people

1180
00:59:06,880 --> 00:59:08,520
Speaker 5: are like, have you seen it on threads? And chances

1181
00:59:08,520 --> 00:59:08,800
Speaker 5: are I.

1182
00:59:08,760 --> 00:59:09,840
Speaker 4: Have not unless you told me.

1183
00:59:09,920 --> 00:59:12,520
Speaker 5: So I'm always like, I'll look at that, but then I.

1184
00:59:12,480 --> 00:59:13,760
Speaker 1: Don't you got it?

1185
00:59:13,880 --> 00:59:16,560
Speaker 2: At least my Instagram is my first and last name,

1186
00:59:16,720 --> 00:59:19,600
Speaker 2: and so's my website, and so's my tiptok.

1187
00:59:19,400 --> 00:59:21,600
Speaker 1: And your substick, your newsletter.

1188
00:59:21,920 --> 00:59:24,640
Speaker 2: It's called a few minutes, so it's a few minutes,

1189
00:59:24,680 --> 00:59:28,280
Speaker 2: dot substack, dot com, perfect and tyree.

1190
00:59:28,720 --> 00:59:31,960
Speaker 6: You can find me on any platform at tyrelevan t

1191
00:59:32,240 --> 00:59:35,800
Speaker 6: y R E l V I N. And I'm on threads,

1192
00:59:35,840 --> 00:59:40,840
Speaker 6: but not really just in name only. I mean I

1193
00:59:41,080 --> 00:59:44,080
Speaker 6: I what is it called when you like are monitoring spirit.

1194
00:59:44,920 --> 00:59:50,200
Speaker 5: I so, I weed, I'm definitely a threads monitoring spirit.

1195
00:59:51,560 --> 00:59:54,080
Speaker 1: I feel like that is a separate conversation for another day.

1196
00:59:54,080 --> 00:59:57,880
Speaker 1: This whole idea of monitoring experience, that's another topic to

1197
00:59:57,960 --> 00:59:58,520
Speaker 1: dive into.

1198
01:00:00,080 --> 01:00:01,800
Speaker 7: Oh yeah, I share one?

1199
01:00:02,800 --> 01:00:04,320
Speaker 4: Can I share one small anecdote?

1200
01:00:04,400 --> 01:00:04,640
Speaker 1: Yes?

1201
01:00:06,400 --> 01:00:08,520
Speaker 4: TM, I so, okay, I live in.

1202
01:00:08,480 --> 01:00:10,000
Speaker 5: Like an old building. I could have been un an

1203
01:00:10,000 --> 01:00:13,240
Speaker 5: old building. We're also in Georgia careers everywhere. A few

1204
01:00:13,280 --> 01:00:16,720
Speaker 5: days ago, I saw a gecko in my bathroom and

1205
01:00:16,760 --> 01:00:20,720
Speaker 5: I know they're around there. I know they're around. He like, calmly,

1206
01:00:20,800 --> 01:00:24,560
Speaker 5: like walked from behind my toilet, underneath my bathroom sink,

1207
01:00:24,600 --> 01:00:26,880
Speaker 5: and I was like, okay, don't come in. So I

1208
01:00:26,920 --> 01:00:30,240
Speaker 5: have them seal completely steal it. So I'm googling, of course,

1209
01:00:30,080 --> 01:00:31,200
Speaker 5: and I'm like what does that mean?

1210
01:00:31,400 --> 01:00:33,640
Speaker 4: Like what? Literally?

1211
01:00:33,680 --> 01:00:34,720
Speaker 2: I'm like what does that mean?

1212
01:00:35,200 --> 01:00:37,480
Speaker 5: And so sometimes you know, when you're like typing it

1213
01:00:37,520 --> 01:00:39,479
Speaker 5: in and Google, you like to see what other people

1214
01:00:39,520 --> 01:00:41,880
Speaker 5: are searching. And so of course I'm like, you know,

1215
01:00:41,880 --> 01:00:43,920
Speaker 5: people are like, depending on who you ask, get goos

1216
01:00:43,920 --> 01:00:44,200
Speaker 5: are good.

1217
01:00:44,200 --> 01:00:46,560
Speaker 4: Look. It means that someone's look watching after you. And

1218
01:00:46,560 --> 01:00:49,560
Speaker 4: then someone's like a gecko is a monitoring spirit that

1219
01:00:49,640 --> 01:00:51,439
Speaker 4: getto means someone wants the worst.

1220
01:00:51,600 --> 01:00:52,400
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh my.

1221
01:00:52,280 --> 01:00:55,640
Speaker 5: God, can we please so all that to say, geckos

1222
01:00:55,640 --> 01:00:57,120
Speaker 5: are not monitoring spirits.

1223
01:00:59,320 --> 01:00:59,840
Speaker 7: Apartment.

1224
01:01:00,160 --> 01:01:02,880
Speaker 1: That's that's so funny that that's your inclination. I don't

1225
01:01:02,920 --> 01:01:05,959
Speaker 1: think that I've ever googled what does such and such mean?

1226
01:01:06,200 --> 01:01:11,240
Speaker 1: As a like A I'm like, a, you know, like something, Yeah,

1227
01:01:11,360 --> 01:01:14,160
Speaker 1: that is so interesting. I mean I have plenty with

1228
01:01:14,200 --> 01:01:16,760
Speaker 1: my Luisi in the background, right, like, I know what

1229
01:01:16,880 --> 01:01:18,160
Speaker 1: a lot of things. But I don't know that I've

1230
01:01:18,200 --> 01:01:21,560
Speaker 1: ever googled, like, oh this thing happened? What does this mean?

1231
01:01:22,280 --> 01:01:24,960
Speaker 5: Because I see them outside, I'm like, and why you

1232
01:01:25,000 --> 01:01:26,120
Speaker 5: want me to see you so bad?

1233
01:01:26,200 --> 01:01:26,480
Speaker 2: Why?

1234
01:01:26,600 --> 01:01:27,840
Speaker 4: Who are you like?

1235
01:01:29,240 --> 01:01:33,120
Speaker 5: Show yourself so you literally I'm like Grandpa that okay,

1236
01:01:33,120 --> 01:01:33,920
Speaker 5: it's my grandmother.

1237
01:01:36,080 --> 01:01:37,200
Speaker 7: Gosh.

1238
01:01:37,240 --> 01:01:39,720
Speaker 1: Well, there's always such a treat to chat with y'all.

1239
01:01:39,720 --> 01:01:42,360
Speaker 1: Thank y'all so much for joining me for this conversation today.

1240
01:01:43,360 --> 01:01:49,880
Speaker 7: Yes, of course, it's.

1241
01:01:49,720 --> 01:01:52,000
Speaker 1: Always so much fun to chat with the production team.

1242
01:01:52,120 --> 01:01:54,720
Speaker 1: I really hope you enjoyed this episode. And a huge

1243
01:01:54,760 --> 01:01:56,840
Speaker 1: shout out to Elise, who was just named on the

1244
01:01:56,880 --> 01:02:01,440
Speaker 1: Forbes thirty Under thirty list. Congratulations, Elise, Did you know

1245
01:02:01,480 --> 01:02:03,800
Speaker 1: that you could leave us a voicemail with your suggestions

1246
01:02:03,800 --> 01:02:06,480
Speaker 1: and questions for the podcast. If there's a book you

1247
01:02:06,520 --> 01:02:09,240
Speaker 1: want to suggest, or movies that you like us to review,

1248
01:02:09,640 --> 01:02:11,520
Speaker 1: or if you have thoughts about topics you'd like us

1249
01:02:11,520 --> 01:02:14,480
Speaker 1: to discuss, drop us a message at Memo dot fm

1250
01:02:14,520 --> 01:02:16,720
Speaker 1: slash Therapy for Black Girls and let us know what's

1251
01:02:16,720 --> 01:02:19,520
Speaker 1: on your mind. We just might feature it on the podcast.

1252
01:02:20,440 --> 01:02:22,919
Speaker 1: If you're looking for a therapist in your area, visit

1253
01:02:22,920 --> 01:02:26,600
Speaker 1: our therapist directory at Therapy for Blackgirls dot com slash directory.

1254
01:02:27,520 --> 01:02:30,040
Speaker 1: Don't forget to follow us on Instagram at Therapy for

1255
01:02:30,080 --> 01:02:32,560
Speaker 1: Black Girls and come on over and join us in

1256
01:02:32,600 --> 01:02:36,160
Speaker 1: our Patreon channel for exclusive updates, behind the scenes content

1257
01:02:36,320 --> 01:02:39,200
Speaker 1: and much more. You can join us at community dot

1258
01:02:39,200 --> 01:02:43,000
Speaker 1: Therapy for Blackgirls dot com. This episode was produced by

1259
01:02:43,040 --> 01:02:47,080
Speaker 1: alist Ellis Indechubuu and Tyree Rush. Editing was done by

1260
01:02:47,120 --> 01:02:50,280
Speaker 1: Dennison Bradford. Thank y'all so much for joining me again

1261
01:02:50,320 --> 01:02:53,280
Speaker 1: this week. I'll look forward to continuing this conversation with

1262
01:02:53,360 --> 01:03:01,240
Speaker 1: you all real soon. Take good care, what