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Speaker 1: It's the radio segment.

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Speaker 2: Who's ninety nine point nine percent sure he's Mary's father?

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Speaker 1: Oh wait, a man, that's a shocker. Crazy episode.

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Speaker 3: We missed that one.

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Speaker 1: Too bad. The show's canceled so we can't get the results.

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Speaker 2: Laser Stories the segment where we read weird news stories

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Speaker 2: around the globe, just like everyone else does, except we

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Speaker 2: have a laser or other Daddy deniers just don't. This

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Speaker 2: first laser story is out of Austria. A few months back,

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Speaker 2: a thirty three year old man was airlifted to Graz

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Speaker 2: University Hospital with serious head injuries after a forestry accident.

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Speaker 1: He needed emergency surgery.

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Speaker 2: Good news, the doctor was there and ready. The bad news,

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Speaker 2: at least for the patient. It was also bring your

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Speaker 2: kid to work day and the surgeon actually let his

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Speaker 2: twelve year old daughter help out in the operating room.

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Speaker 1: You j like they do that?

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Speaker 2: What didn't need the cutest scalpel ever?

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Speaker 1: In Austria, they do it.

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Speaker 2: And she wasn't just watching her dad work, she herself

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Speaker 2: got to drill a hole in the patient's skull. Way.

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Speaker 1: That's a good dad, I guess.

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Speaker 3: She wins like when the class asked what you did with.

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Speaker 2: Your parent from believe it or not, The surgery was

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Speaker 2: deemed a total success, and the patient was none the wiser.

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Speaker 3: Why easy to drill a hole in somebody's head? Like

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Speaker 3: it's so simple a child can do.

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Speaker 1: Well. A month later, a nurse snitched.

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Speaker 2: The media picked up the wild story, and that was

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Speaker 2: when the alleged victim, a man named Jonas, just happened

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Speaker 2: to be reading the newspaper and noticed the hospital, the time.

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Speaker 1: The accident, and even the injuries all matched his own.

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Speaker 2: That's when Jonas realized he was the patient that the

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Speaker 2: preteen had worked on.

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Speaker 3: Are you proud of the kid because it was a success.

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Speaker 1: Hands on experience?

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Speaker 2: Well, Jonas has now hired a lawyer and is suing

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Speaker 2: the hospital. The hospital has responded by firing that surgeon

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Speaker 2: and hiring his daughter.

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Speaker 3: It's Dickie Housard.

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Speaker 1: Look at that happy ending there. Let's go to your

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Speaker 1: next laser story.

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Speaker 2: Out of Missouri, the Department of Wildlife Conservation was called

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Speaker 2: into help when a hiker found a supposedly injured bald

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Speaker 2: eagle at Wilson's Creek National Battlefield. He was he was

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Speaker 2: worried that the bird was hurt as it was flapping

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Speaker 2: its wings trying to get off the ground but couldn't.

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Speaker 2: Authorities rushed in to rescue the majestic animal and took

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Speaker 2: it to the local zoo. That's where an X ray

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Speaker 2: soon discovered the un thinkable. The bird wasn't injured at all.

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Speaker 2: Apparently he'd eaten a big raccoon road killed dinner and

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Speaker 2: was just too fat to fly.

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Speaker 1: American even our animals over each Yeah, you know, I

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Speaker 1: love how it's a rat's a raccoon track.

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Speaker 2: They even found the raccoon's paw inside the bird's stomach.

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Speaker 3: I mean, you gotta stop. He's got to learn to

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Speaker 3: you know, to his body.

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Speaker 2: The good news is they were able to rehabilitate the

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Speaker 2: eagle with a couple of rounds of ozepic.

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Speaker 1: Just kidding. Yeah, that's in the trial phases for bald eagles.

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Speaker 1: After he is not going to prove that for at

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Speaker 1: least six months.

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Speaker 3: Suddenly we have bald eagles.

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Speaker 2: Chin got the eagle going on a lean diet and

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Speaker 2: then after a few days, he was able to bounce

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Speaker 2: back to its original weight.

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Speaker 1: Mail bald.

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Speaker 2: It was cleared of any injuries and got released back

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Speaker 2: into the National Park.

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Speaker 1: A lot of inspiring stories today.

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Speaker 2: Next laser stories out of Tech Trends USA. This is

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Speaker 2: one of those stories that reminds you, yep, we are

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Speaker 2: living in the future. A tech startup in California called

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Speaker 2: reflect Orbital is planning to use mirrored satellites to sell

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Speaker 2: people sunlight while it's dark out.

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Speaker 3: Wait a minute, so why would you want some like

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Speaker 3: just turn the lights on.

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Speaker 2: If you want to be in direct sun, you can

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Speaker 2: put sun over your house. Basically, sunlight is getting redirected

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Speaker 2: anywhere anytime on Earth. It's mainly designed to help big

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Speaker 2: solar farms keep generating power at night. That's why you'll

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Speaker 2: need a pretty big plot of land to get it approved.

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Speaker 2: God each patch of sunlight will be three miles across,

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Speaker 2: So if you're in the suburbs, be careful.

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Speaker 1: You neighbors probably not going to be too crazy about it.

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Speaker 2: You suck.

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Speaker 3: Do you know there's gonna be some rich celebrity that's like,

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Speaker 3: do you want to come to my summertime home where

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Speaker 3: it's sunny every day?

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Speaker 2: Don't expect to have sunlight twenty four hours a day though,

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Speaker 2: at least not yet. For now, you'll only get four

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Speaker 2: minutes worth of sun.

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Speaker 1: Okay, the next they can make the price.

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Speaker 2: As for the price, it's not clear how much they're

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Speaker 2: planning to charge, but it.

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Speaker 1: Won't be cheap.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm gonna say too much.

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Speaker 2: They're hoping to start their initial test run late next year,

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Speaker 2: but anyone can go to their website and fill out

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Speaker 2: a Sunshine application. The deadline to apply is October twenty third.

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Speaker 3: It feels like it'd be cheaper to just take a

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Speaker 3: plane to keep, you know, staying in front of the sun,

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Speaker 3: staying on the side of the globe bill.

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Speaker 2: Their point, this next Lazer story is out of furniture world.

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Speaker 3: I don't know that we've been here.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, what do you got, Jeff?

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Speaker 2: If Craigslist still has employees, they are freaking out right now.

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Speaker 2: Why because Ikea is launching a new website where customers

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Speaker 2: are going to be able to sell their used Ikea furniture.

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Speaker 3: You could already buy some new stuff at the stores,

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Speaker 3: Like that's awesome.

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Speaker 1: There's a whole website dedicated to it. It's called Ikea

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Speaker 1: pre Owned. Do you know what I want?

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Speaker 3: Can you buy the ones where people fix them up

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Speaker 3: and do all the Ikea hacks to it where it

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Speaker 3: looks like a high end piece of furniture. But it's

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Speaker 3: it's still idea, but they make it look Yeah.

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Speaker 1: That's not in the Ikea spirit.

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Speaker 2: This is.

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Speaker 1: This is a peer to peer.

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Speaker 2: Marketplace where you're gonna be able to sell your used

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Speaker 2: Ikea crap to other people that it did.

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Speaker 3: They come with the extra bolts that you didn't figure

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Speaker 3: out better.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's good.

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Speaker 2: It's got a few bells and whistles to make things easier,

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Speaker 2: like an AI powered database that adds images and measurements

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Speaker 2: for you. Oh wow, and you'll have the option of

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Speaker 2: being paid in cash or in Ikea credit with a

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Speaker 2: fifteen percent bonus. They're gonna say in Swedish meatballs stuff.

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Speaker 1: I would take those two.

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Speaker 2: They're testing this idea in Spain and Norway through the

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Speaker 2: end of the year, with plans to roll it out

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Speaker 2: to other countries to that. But hey, it might get

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Speaker 2: easier to toss that old Neotstorp chair up online and

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Speaker 2: see how much you can get for it.

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Speaker 1: I've been looking for a storm high demands.

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Speaker 2: As for this guy's thoughts on IKEA's new venture, he

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Speaker 2: is all about it.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, do you know.

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Speaker 2: How many Ikea bed frames he has broken in his time?

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Speaker 1: You're not built strong enough for him, that is going

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Speaker 1: to be the shoe storage things, but all of it.

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Speaker 1: That's how it means Laser Stories has come to an

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Speaker 1: end for the day. We'll do it again, same time

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Speaker 1: on Friday

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Speaker 3: Broken Jeffrey in the morning,