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Speaker 1: It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if

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Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,

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Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com

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Speaker 1: and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your

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Speaker 1: letter live on the air, just like we're going to

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Speaker 1: read this one right here, right now, and you never know,

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Speaker 1: it could be yours.

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Speaker 2: It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on tight.

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Speaker 2: We got it for you here. It is Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, nephew. Subject He's not meeting my basic needs.

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Speaker 1: Dear Stephen Shirley, I've been married for seven years, but

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Speaker 1: we are separated. My husband saw text messages and pictures

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Speaker 1: I sent to another man, and he didn't try to

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Speaker 1: work things out with me and see why I was

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Speaker 1: involved with someone else. I have had a boyfriend for

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Speaker 1: a few months and he is a great lover and

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Speaker 1: an excellent provider. I didn't have to ask for a thing.

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Speaker 1: I don't have to ask for a thing or lift

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Speaker 1: a finger when I'm around him. He knows how to

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Speaker 1: treat a woman. My husband, on the other hand, would

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Speaker 1: get upset and call me trifling if I add him

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Speaker 1: to put gas in my car or wash it for me.

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Speaker 1: My husband didn't care if I was happy with our

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Speaker 1: sex life or not. He only cared if his needs

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Speaker 1: were being met. My boyfriend has me meet him at

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Speaker 1: the gas station once a week and he pumps my gas.

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Speaker 1: He also looks me in the eyes during intimacy and

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Speaker 1: he checks on me to make sure I'm having a

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Speaker 1: good time. I brought all of this up to my

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Speaker 1: husband and it only made him mad, and he told

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Speaker 1: me I can keep my boyfriend because he's divorcing me.

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Speaker 1: After two weeks of having the house to myself, I

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Speaker 1: get lonely. I got lonely and decided to ask my

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Speaker 1: husband if he would have if he would like to

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Speaker 1: talk to someone and try to get our marriage back

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Speaker 1: on track. He agreed, but counseling didn't work because we

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Speaker 1: went to a Christian woman that had been cheated on

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Speaker 1: and mistreated by a few men. So she took my

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Speaker 1: husband's side and told him he did right by leaving me. Look,

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Speaker 1: I know I'm wrong, but I'm not going to shortchange

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Speaker 1: myself and be miserable, especially now that I know what

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Speaker 1: being with the real man is like. My boyfriend wants

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Speaker 1: me to file for divorce. But I want my husband

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Speaker 1: to file so I won't be the bad guy. Is

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Speaker 1: my marriage really over? Or can we work past this?

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Speaker 1: What that's your marriage over? Did you read this? You

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Speaker 1: know you're sending text messages to another man. You've been

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Speaker 1: separated for quite a while. You know you've been to

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Speaker 1: counseling that didn't work. You're sleeping with someone else. You

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Speaker 1: said you like this other guy better. You said your

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Speaker 1: husband was a selfish lover, didn't take care of your car,

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Speaker 1: doesn't know how to treat a woman. What does it

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Speaker 1: matter who files first? You don't want to be the

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Speaker 1: bad guy, you say, But making the first move does

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Speaker 1: not make you a bad person. I think you're confused.

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Speaker 1: You're you know, on one hand, you got this man

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Speaker 1: who you say you like, and then on the other hand,

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Speaker 1: you're asking can you work past this? I mean, you

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Speaker 1: know you can give this to try, but it looks

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Speaker 1: like to me your marriage is over. Making the first move,

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Speaker 1: like I said, does not make you a bad person.

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Speaker 1: You are confused, by the way. What kind of counselor

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Speaker 1: did you guys go to. I've never heard of a

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Speaker 1: counselor that would tell the husband he did right by

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Speaker 1: leaving you, especially a Christian counselor. But Christian or not,

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Speaker 1: she's a bad counselor, and you, guys can go to

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Speaker 1: another one if you choose. You need to make up

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Speaker 1: your mind what you want. You are confused because your

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Speaker 1: boyfriend is pressuring you to get a divorce. Whatever you do,

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Speaker 1: do it for the right reasons, because that do it

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Speaker 1: for what's best for you in this situation, not because

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Speaker 1: someone is trying to make you get a divorce. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: it looks like your marriage is over, Steve.

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Speaker 2: You know surely you in your Strawberry letters about eight times.

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Speaker 2: You have eight endings in your rebuttals, and I find

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Speaker 2: it fascinating because you're very As a matter of fact,

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Speaker 2: I happen to agree. I've been to agree with the

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Speaker 2: things you've said. This you know what I'm getting tired

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Speaker 2: of for me and for shure. Y'all stop writing us

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Speaker 2: with all this BS and then expect us to make

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Speaker 2: some sense of it. What are you talking about? Why

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Speaker 2: did you write us? Is your marriage over? It's over

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Speaker 2: at the beginning of the year. Listen the beginning of

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Speaker 2: the letter. You was married seven years, but we separated.

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Speaker 2: That's the first line in the letter. Then then you

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Speaker 2: tell us all through the letter why y'all separated. Then

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Speaker 2: at the end you want some hope. Hell, ain't no

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Speaker 2: hope in the damn letter. Let me tell you what's

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Speaker 2: wrong with you and him? Y'all was married for seven years,

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Speaker 2: but we separated immediately. She tell you why. My husband

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Speaker 2: saw some text messages and pictures I sent to another

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Speaker 2: man and he ain't try to work things out with

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Speaker 2: me and see why I was involved with somebody else?

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Speaker 2: What what he needed to see? What he needed to

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Speaker 2: work out? He saw the text, he saw the pictures.

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Speaker 2: You don't text him like that, You don't send him

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Speaker 2: pictures like that. So what would work out with you?

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Speaker 1: Y'all?

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Speaker 2: It's over? And he didn't try to see why I

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Speaker 2: was involved with somebody else?

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Speaker 1: What.

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Speaker 2: I've had a boyfriend for a few months. He's a

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Speaker 2: great lover and an excellent provider. I don't have to

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Speaker 2: ask for a thing or lift a finger when I'm

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Speaker 2: around him. He knows how to treat a woman. Okay, congratulations,

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Speaker 2: What is the rest of this letter? Fault seems pretty

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Speaker 2: final so far. My husband, on the other hand, would

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Speaker 2: get upset and call me trifling if I asked him

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Speaker 2: to put gas in my car washing for me. That's

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Speaker 2: because your husband don't give a damn about you. That's

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Speaker 2: all this is. He don't give a damn about you.

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Speaker 2: My husband didn't care if I was happy with our

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Speaker 2: sex life or not. He only cared if his needs

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Speaker 2: were being met. My boyfriend has me meet him at

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Speaker 2: the gas station once a week and he pumps my gas.

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Speaker 2: He also looks me in the eyes doing intimacy and

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Speaker 2: checks on me to make sure I'm having a good time. Okay,

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Speaker 2: why we're still typing this damn letter? You have a problem,

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Speaker 2: you found a solution.

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Speaker 1: Tada.

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Speaker 2: Hang on, I said, tada.

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Speaker 1: We'll have part two of your response coming up to

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Speaker 1: today's Struwberry letter at twenty three minutes after it is

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Speaker 1: he's not meeting my basic needs. We'll get back into

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Speaker 1: it right after this. You're listening Hary Morning Show. All right,

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Speaker 1: Come on, Steve, let's recap today's Strawberry letter. The subject

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Speaker 1: He's not meeting my basic needs.

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Speaker 2: I'm so sick of these letters. I'm so we got

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Speaker 2: to help the people. We can't help these people. I'm

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Speaker 2: not trying to help her. I'ma just be real with you.

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Speaker 2: Should I'm not trying to help her. Matter of fact,

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Speaker 2: she really don't give a damn with her job. It

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Speaker 2: ain't ain't my job. Listen to me, Shirley, And he said,

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Speaker 2: I've been married for seven years, but we separated. Okay, cool.

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Speaker 2: That's usually the beginning of the divorcement. Very few people

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Speaker 2: separate and come back together. Very few.

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Speaker 1: But they did go to counseling, so there's a little okay.

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Speaker 2: We don't get to that in a minute. This is

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Speaker 2: why they got separated. My husband saw some pictures I

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Speaker 2: sent to another man. He ain't try to work things

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Speaker 2: out with me. Off try to find out why I

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Speaker 2: was involved. Hell, he read the text and saw the pictures.

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Speaker 2: He see why you were involved. He read the text.

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Speaker 2: I've had a boyfriend for a few months. He's a

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Speaker 2: great lover and extit provider. He know how to treat

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Speaker 2: a woman. My husband don't. On the other hand, that

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Speaker 2: would get upset and call me trifling if I asked

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Speaker 2: him to put gas in my car or wash it

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Speaker 2: for me. That's because your husband don't give a damn

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Speaker 2: about you. My husband didn't care if I was happy

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Speaker 2: with our sex life or not. He only cared about

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Speaker 2: his needs. Your boyfriend meets you once a week at

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Speaker 2: the gas station so he could pump my gas. Okay,

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Speaker 2: what go with your boyfriend?

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Speaker 1: What?

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Speaker 2: You're still typing us for what you want me and

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Speaker 2: Shirley to do. You have a solution to your problem.

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Speaker 2: It's your boyfriend. He also looks me in the eyes

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Speaker 2: and make sure and now then hear the part right

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Speaker 2: here where a letter turned.

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Speaker 1: Come on.

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Speaker 2: I brought all this up to my husband and it

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Speaker 2: only made him mad. He told me I can keep

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Speaker 2: my boyfriend. Yes, okay, you don't see the end. Wait

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Speaker 2: a minute. You told your husband that your man looks

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Speaker 2: you in the eye when y'all intimate. You did, oh

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Speaker 2: your hugs, that he meets you once a week to

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Speaker 2: pump your gas. You told your husband you ain't got

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Speaker 2: to lift a finger for nothing. You know what your

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Speaker 2: husband told you keep your damn boyfriend because I'm divorcing you.

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Speaker 1: You don't care.

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Speaker 2: After two weeks of having the house to myself, I

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Speaker 2: got lonely. I decided to ask my husband if he

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Speaker 2: would like to talk to someone and try to get

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Speaker 2: our marriage back on track. I'm trying to find out

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Speaker 2: who's stupid in this letter and who the fool in

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Speaker 2: this letter, because there's two people in this letter. It's

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Speaker 2: a stupid person in this letter, and it's a fool

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Speaker 2: in the letter. Now, I'm not trying to be judgmental, lady,

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Speaker 2: but you're like you both of them. It just seemed

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Speaker 2: to me like, yeah, you're the stupid person in the food.

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Speaker 2: He agreed, He agreed, But counseling didn't work because we

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Speaker 2: went to a Christian woman now listen to this, that

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Speaker 2: had been cheated on and mistreated by a few men.

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Speaker 2: So she took my husband's side. That don't make no

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Speaker 2: damn sense. All. Here's a woman that's been cheated on

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Speaker 2: and dogged out by several women, and she took her

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Speaker 2: husband's side. You know why she took your husband's side

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Speaker 2: because you the one cheated on him. That's why she

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Speaker 2: took your husband's side. You got texts and pictures and

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Speaker 2: sent them to another man. You in here looking deeply

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Speaker 2: into his eyes. You the one letting him pump yo gass?

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Speaker 2: You the one?

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Speaker 1: Wow? What was that?

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Speaker 2: You the one letting him pump yo? Then she said, look,

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Speaker 2: I know I'm wrong, Okay, yeah, why are you writing

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Speaker 2: me and Shirley? But I'm not going to short change

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Speaker 2: myself and be miserable, especially now that I know what

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Speaker 2: being with the real man is like, well, go get

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Speaker 2: with him.

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Speaker 1: Then she's confused.

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Speaker 2: My boyfriend wants me to file for divorce file, but

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Speaker 2: I want my husband to file Why so I won't

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Speaker 2: be the bad guy? WHOA? So you don't be the

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Speaker 2: bad guy. You didn't think when you were sending them

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Speaker 2: texting them pictures. You don't think that was bad. You

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Speaker 2: don't think he was the bad guy. You don't you don't.

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Speaker 2: You don't think he was the bad guy when you

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Speaker 2: was letting him pump yo gas. Don't you don't think

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Speaker 2: he was the bad guy. You don't think he was

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Speaker 2: the bad guy when you set your husband down and

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Speaker 2: threw it up in his face. I got a boyfriend.

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Speaker 2: He pumped my gas, He looked in my eyes. He

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Speaker 2: treat me right. He did this right here. He gonna

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Speaker 2: get mad. The nerve you lucky. That's all he did

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Speaker 2: was getting mad. You can't take most men into the

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Speaker 2: brink like that. So let's give this man some credit

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Speaker 2: because he held, he stayed strong, wasn't didn't get physical,

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Speaker 2: took it like a man. Just say hey, I'm divorcing.

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Speaker 2: You get your ragged ass on. Is my marriage really over? Or?

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Speaker 2: Can we work past this? Can I tell you some lady,

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Speaker 2: your husband don't want you? Don't know? Man want no

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Speaker 2: woman that been disrespected him like this? Can we work

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Speaker 2: past this? No? Man won't know? What did you say, Shelby?

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Speaker 1: I said, why did he go to counseling with her?

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Speaker 1: That's the little glimmer of hope. That's no hope.

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Speaker 2: He just she went on there. She just asked him,

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Speaker 2: let's go to counseling. He just said, Yeah, he went

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Speaker 2: out there and found out he was one hundred percent correct. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: ain't no more counseling, all right? And don't and don't

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Speaker 2: nobody want you? You need to go on to see

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Speaker 2: if you'd borar fore and for real or not.

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Speaker 1: That's what cleave your comments onto.

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Speaker 2: Today's Don't Want your little raggedy behind.

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Speaker 1: On Instagram at Steve Harvey FM and check us out

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Speaker 1: on the Strawberry Letter podcast on the free iHeartRadio app

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Speaker 1: where free never sounded so good. Now coming up next

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Speaker 1: to It's Junior with sports Talk. Right after this, you're

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Speaker 1: listening to Harvey Morning Show