WEBVTT - Your Coochie's on Camera Part 2 0:00:02.040 --> 0:00:07.400 Welcome to Jay dot m a production of I Heart Radio. 0:00:10.560 --> 0:00:15.480 Welcome back to Shane dot Elder podcast. Agel Graydon Danceler. 0:00:16.440 --> 0:00:22.440 Your fly is St Claire, I am present and this 0:00:22.440 --> 0:00:25.520 this is your friend. This is Jill Scott from North Philly, 0:00:25.640 --> 0:00:31.560 a k a. Jilly and uh, welcome to Jay dot 0:00:31.560 --> 0:00:37.720 Elga podcast. We've been talking again, of course, and you're 0:00:37.840 --> 0:00:40.960 you're walking in on a conversation that we're having about 0:00:41.840 --> 0:00:48.760 whole pleasure versus versus the pieces. I guess whole versus pieces. 0:00:48.800 --> 0:00:52.400 Maybe that's what it is. We initially started this conversation 0:00:52.479 --> 0:00:55.920 talking about receiving oral sex. And I'm just gonna put 0:00:55.960 --> 0:00:57.680 it out there because this is this is what we 0:00:57.760 --> 0:01:03.320 do on this podcast. I never liked it, friends, I 0:01:03.480 --> 0:01:07.520 just never liked it. For many many years. It just 0:01:07.720 --> 0:01:13.160 was not my thing until recently, thank you, but but 0:01:13.280 --> 0:01:17.399 for many many years. I know, right, it's a whole 0:01:17.440 --> 0:01:21.480 world for me, It's a whole new world. Wanted it. 0:01:22.240 --> 0:01:26.679 I never wanted that. I'm always allowed it. I allowed 0:01:26.720 --> 0:01:30.360 it because I was being gracious, you know, I'm allowing 0:01:30.480 --> 0:01:33.200 it because you you know, the mate or the person 0:01:33.400 --> 0:01:37.399 you get all excited about it. But I was just 0:01:37.440 --> 0:01:41.200 trying to get the penetration and quite frankly, you know, 0:01:41.280 --> 0:01:46.600 let's get Yeah. But but this opened up a really 0:01:46.600 --> 0:01:49.160 interesting conversation because we're just thinking about, well why that is, 0:01:49.240 --> 0:01:51.720 and and and Amber had mentioned that maybe it was 0:01:51.760 --> 0:01:54.640 a control thing. Maybe it's about kind of releasing the 0:01:54.720 --> 0:01:58.360 control over the situation, or being or being deeply vulnerable 0:01:58.360 --> 0:02:01.400 in that moment, or any number of different kind of 0:02:01.440 --> 0:02:04.720 things mentally as to why it might be something you're 0:02:04.720 --> 0:02:08.840 not really into, which I thought was really worth exploring, 0:02:08.919 --> 0:02:12.720 because then it got into another part of the conversation 0:02:12.720 --> 0:02:15.520 where I was like, oh, wait a minute, if we 0:02:15.639 --> 0:02:20.400 look at this a little different from being like why 0:02:20.480 --> 0:02:24.040 do I not like this thing? Into like, well, what 0:02:24.160 --> 0:02:26.519 is it that I'm trying to achieve from an intimate moment? 0:02:26.560 --> 0:02:28.960 Like what am I trying to get at? You know? 0:02:29.120 --> 0:02:31.480 And it's like outside of just kind of I guess, 0:02:31.480 --> 0:02:33.799 the immediate pleasure of what sex brings, but just how 0:02:33.840 --> 0:02:36.680 we can look at our bodies and and experience that 0:02:36.720 --> 0:02:41.079 in a full way. And I thought that's pretty dope. Yeah, No, 0:02:41.680 --> 0:02:44.280 it don't seem like it just seems I agree. It 0:02:44.280 --> 0:02:47.480 just seemed like some partners are just here to prove 0:02:47.520 --> 0:02:50.000 a point. You know, I can do this better than 0:02:50.040 --> 0:02:52.079 anybody else could do this, and then I'm gonna show 0:02:52.160 --> 0:02:57.200 you on you you know, you know it's like, yeah, 0:02:57.240 --> 0:02:59.080 and that's a point, says I'm every dude. I feel 0:02:59.080 --> 0:03:01.560 like it's some basic fundamentals. Men feel like there are 0:03:01.600 --> 0:03:05.240 certain things that if they master that women will you know, 0:03:05.480 --> 0:03:08.800 fall into their arms. And women are just not all 0:03:08.840 --> 0:03:12.560 the same in that way. No, definitely not me. It's 0:03:12.639 --> 0:03:15.519 not something that turned me out ever. But that's why 0:03:15.600 --> 0:03:18.040 men are just as much victims of, you know, these 0:03:18.120 --> 0:03:20.959 kind of weird practices as much as we are, because 0:03:21.000 --> 0:03:23.120 I think at the end of the day, they enjoy 0:03:23.200 --> 0:03:28.160 a full experience too, because you know, it's interesting, Um 0:03:28.280 --> 0:03:31.960 Jill said this many episodes back when she talked about 0:03:32.040 --> 0:03:36.640 kissing and you know how some couples just stopped kissing, 0:03:37.040 --> 0:03:40.880 and it's like, I don't know, here recently and Fatima 0:03:41.000 --> 0:03:45.480 always kiss but we spent more time kissing, and that 0:03:45.600 --> 0:03:49.800 in and of itself is so sensual and so intense, 0:03:50.480 --> 0:03:53.240 and it's just like, and you've done nothing but kiss 0:03:53.400 --> 0:03:57.400 at that point and spending ten fifteen minutes just doing that, 0:03:57.440 --> 0:04:00.920 I mean, all of those things and we talked about 0:04:00.920 --> 0:04:03.720 things like tantric sex, and I have never done that, 0:04:03.760 --> 0:04:06.200 but then I realized that I have because I just 0:04:06.240 --> 0:04:08.440 call it. I don't have nowhere to go, because it's 0:04:08.480 --> 0:04:10.920 like we don't have anywhere to go, so they don't 0:04:10.920 --> 0:04:13.720 have to rush. We're not rushing through this. We're not 0:04:13.760 --> 0:04:16.480 trying to get to some magical end result, even though 0:04:16.520 --> 0:04:18.560 we are. But you know, the point is that it's 0:04:18.600 --> 0:04:22.800 an understanding. But it's just like we're here, we're us, 0:04:23.320 --> 0:04:27.480 let's test just be us, Let's you know, look at 0:04:27.520 --> 0:04:31.760 each other, let's touch each other, let's love each other. 0:04:32.400 --> 0:04:36.160 And then the tantric part. A lot a lot of 0:04:36.200 --> 0:04:40.520 that is breathing into each other. There's nothing and no 0:04:40.560 --> 0:04:43.560 one else around. Like you said, we got time. We 0:04:43.640 --> 0:04:47.920 ain't gotta go nowhere, So we take moments to to really, 0:04:48.360 --> 0:04:54.560 um connect with your lover spiritually, not just physically. The 0:04:54.560 --> 0:04:58.080 there's an art to not touching. There is romance and 0:04:58.240 --> 0:05:01.600 not touching as well, and um, you know, I just 0:05:01.720 --> 0:05:05.720 I'm feeling kind of away, feeling like, oh no, if 0:05:05.760 --> 0:05:10.760 everybody's just watching porn and thinking that that, you know, 0:05:10.839 --> 0:05:12.960 think about the things they say. You know, I gotta 0:05:13.000 --> 0:05:17.320 beat the pussy up. You know, I killed it. You know, violence, 0:05:18.960 --> 0:05:22.919 it's it's all so violent, violent, you know, and everything 0:05:23.760 --> 0:05:28.280 and that. I'm like, wait a minute, y'all. I'm like, 0:05:28.279 --> 0:05:33.720 it's not all. No, no, not all, not all. But 0:05:33.760 --> 0:05:37.440 if that's the only kind you're watching, you've got a 0:05:37.560 --> 0:05:41.240 very limited view on what sex and sexuality is like 0:05:41.560 --> 0:05:44.360 if you're only listening to guys who say things like 0:05:44.360 --> 0:05:46.600 like yeah, but but terms like beat the pussy up 0:05:46.640 --> 0:05:50.640 are like regular, Yeah, that's hip hop though. See that's 0:05:50.680 --> 0:05:53.200 that's the funny part. I'm like, that'shi, that's hip hop. 0:05:53.760 --> 0:05:56.839 And then and every sometimes you do want your pussy 0:05:56.880 --> 0:06:02.080 beat up? Yeah, that's what that. I don't never want 0:06:02.120 --> 0:06:04.080 my pussy beat up. I made a point to tell 0:06:04.120 --> 0:06:07.159 people I don't please. Whatever you do, don't beat this 0:06:07.240 --> 0:06:09.480 pussy up. I don't want no scars when you finish. 0:06:09.760 --> 0:06:12.200 I don't want no bruises. Don't beat this pussy up. 0:06:12.360 --> 0:06:14.560 That don't even turn me on. That drives me out. 0:06:14.640 --> 0:06:16.839 I don't want the vision, just the thought of beating 0:06:16.880 --> 0:06:21.080 a pussy up. Why why ain't you? I mean, we 0:06:21.160 --> 0:06:23.560 didn't have to give me a while set, but you ain't. 0:06:23.560 --> 0:06:29.000 You never got to beat my pussy up beat it up, 0:06:29.040 --> 0:06:32.960 but he can't live it. Good God. No. Once time 0:06:32.960 --> 0:06:35.839 I heard it described as a good friend of ours 0:06:35.920 --> 0:06:41.400 wrote a song and in the song he says, tonight, 0:06:41.400 --> 0:06:46.200 I'm gonna be bullying you. Oh yeah, well that's what 0:06:48.200 --> 0:06:51.920 It's a little softer, but I ain't gonna lie. I 0:06:51.960 --> 0:06:57.120 was like, well, I got in the back of the 0:06:57.200 --> 0:07:01.599 class of my hand up. A little bully. A little 0:07:01.640 --> 0:07:05.200 bully is okay. Yes, you want to tell me what 0:07:05.320 --> 0:07:09.480 to do? Okay, A little bully is okay. You can 0:07:09.520 --> 0:07:12.440 tell me what to do. You can tell me what 0:07:12.480 --> 0:07:15.360 to do. If you can tell me what to do, yes, 0:07:15.960 --> 0:07:19.280 you can tell me what to do. You can't tell 0:07:19.320 --> 0:07:23.680 me what You can't tell me what to do. You 0:07:23.720 --> 0:07:27.480 can't tell me what to do. You just you just can't. 0:07:27.640 --> 0:07:31.520 Can't write it takes a certain kind of authority for 0:07:31.680 --> 0:07:38.160 me anyway, because I look at myself as a lionesst um, 0:07:38.240 --> 0:07:41.960 and I want my lion to to address me as such. 0:07:42.840 --> 0:07:46.160 You know, I don't. I get it, I get it, 0:07:46.760 --> 0:07:49.280 I get it. I get it. I feel like I 0:07:49.320 --> 0:07:51.600 feel like we need to be role specific here in 0:07:51.600 --> 0:07:54.600 the sense of that everybody's gonna have their can't or 0:07:54.640 --> 0:07:59.840 whatever and this is not about you know, that just 0:08:00.040 --> 0:08:06.280 varies from person to person, but the idea that we 0:08:07.240 --> 0:08:12.720 don't separate the vagina or separate the sexual organs or 0:08:13.000 --> 0:08:17.320 the things that society says are sexy breasts or butts 0:08:17.400 --> 0:08:20.280 or whatever, that we don't start we don't separate those 0:08:20.280 --> 0:08:24.080 things from a human being, and that we we learn 0:08:24.160 --> 0:08:28.800 to humanize the sexual experience and the pleasure experience, and 0:08:28.880 --> 0:08:33.439 that that you're in a moment with another person, and 0:08:33.480 --> 0:08:35.800 that they're a full person and they have a whole 0:08:35.880 --> 0:08:40.520 body and a mind and an emotions, and and that 0:08:40.640 --> 0:08:43.080 they're real, you know what I mean, and that they're 0:08:43.080 --> 0:08:46.120 not an object. And I think that happens both ways. 0:08:46.120 --> 0:08:50.000 And honestly, I feel like men free themselves when they 0:08:50.000 --> 0:08:53.600 are treated like that, and just as we do, we 0:08:53.760 --> 0:08:57.079 free ourselves when we're treated like that. These two human beings, 0:08:57.480 --> 0:08:59.440 even when it's same sex, no matter what it is, 0:09:00.000 --> 0:09:02.640 and it's two human beings that respect their humanity and 0:09:02.640 --> 0:09:05.640 they go into that situation and it's all about that, 0:09:06.360 --> 0:09:11.720 honey king, whatever spectrum of the kinks that you want, 0:09:12.360 --> 0:09:15.000 it's fine, But at the end of the day, it's 0:09:15.040 --> 0:09:18.080 a person. And that's that's why I feel like love 0:09:18.160 --> 0:09:21.120 is so important. Love in the sense, in the larger 0:09:21.200 --> 0:09:24.800 sense of love, you know what I mean, but love 0:09:25.000 --> 0:09:34.120 friendship you actually like somebody trust trust. I trust that 0:09:34.240 --> 0:09:37.280 you're going to choke me. I trust that you're not 0:09:37.360 --> 0:09:45.240 going to take me to Thank you exactly exactly. Yeah, yeah, 0:09:46.360 --> 0:09:52.199 to put it there. Thank you friend, thank you so yeah, 0:09:52.440 --> 0:09:54.640 thank you friend. It's just a lot of folks that 0:09:55.000 --> 0:09:57.640 just giving me so many gems tonight, I'm gonna say 0:09:57.679 --> 0:10:04.040 thank you, nice, thank you. I'm like texted right now. 0:10:04.600 --> 0:10:06.960 I like it when it's so good. All you gotta 0:10:07.000 --> 0:10:09.959 do is touch feet and it feels if it's something 0:10:10.000 --> 0:10:12.440 you feel it in your in your in your coach, 0:10:12.840 --> 0:10:21.200 are you yeah, I am really yeah yeah, but not 0:10:21.320 --> 0:10:24.160 like in the mouth right like no, no, no, no, no, 0:10:24.160 --> 0:10:26.240 no no, I'm good on that. Just the touch of 0:10:26.320 --> 0:10:32.079 the touch, like the foot touch. Yeah, but I really 0:10:32.120 --> 0:10:34.480 love a foot. Time you felt that one, Yeah, that's 0:10:34.520 --> 0:10:36.319 when you know. That's what I mean for me. That's 0:10:36.360 --> 0:10:40.920 the clue you're you're ready, okay, Yeah, yeah, I got 0:10:40.920 --> 0:10:43.800 a thing. I definitely have a thing for hands and feet, 0:10:45.440 --> 0:10:47.840 you know. But like ages said, everybody's gonna have their 0:10:47.920 --> 0:10:52.360 kinks and their proclivities. What we're really talking about is 0:10:52.360 --> 0:10:56.280 is connecting with your whole self and not just the 0:10:56.320 --> 0:10:59.040 pieces of you. Yeah, somebody's gonna be like, oh I 0:10:59.080 --> 0:11:01.400 like your ass, well I like your bru your tits 0:11:01.520 --> 0:11:04.600 or whatever, or they want to, you know, just connect 0:11:04.600 --> 0:11:08.280 with your vagina, but not with you at all. You 0:11:08.320 --> 0:11:10.640 know that happens a lot. I feel like that happens 0:11:10.720 --> 0:11:14.480 way too much. But you know the difference because you've 0:11:14.520 --> 0:11:16.760 all felt we've all had that well hopefully we've all 0:11:16.800 --> 0:11:19.200 had that feeling where you might be having some great sex, 0:11:19.520 --> 0:11:23.080 but it's the moment when you guys catch each other's eyes. 0:11:24.360 --> 0:11:27.640 It's a moment when it's just like you digging into 0:11:27.679 --> 0:11:30.160 each other soul moment and yeah, this is happening too, 0:11:30.280 --> 0:11:38.000 but oh oh oh yeah, oh m hmmm, it's a 0:11:38.080 --> 0:11:56.400 beautiful thing. More conversation after the break, I will say 0:11:56.400 --> 0:11:59.080 this and and to to bring back one of the 0:11:59.160 --> 0:12:02.600 things that we earned coming into doing these episodes, where 0:12:02.600 --> 0:12:05.680 it's like, you know, so much of the of the 0:12:05.840 --> 0:12:08.559 treating another person in that way comes from first kind 0:12:08.600 --> 0:12:12.400 of knowing and understanding your body. And you know, I 0:12:12.440 --> 0:12:16.280 had no idea that we had come so far in 0:12:16.320 --> 0:12:19.360 this journey to kind of like really get to know 0:12:20.040 --> 0:12:23.560 your body as a woman and how it functions and 0:12:23.640 --> 0:12:28.560 the functions of this body, you know. And just recently 0:12:28.559 --> 0:12:30.360 we were it was brought to my attention that a 0:12:30.440 --> 0:12:33.920 lot of women are using like even apps to kind 0:12:33.920 --> 0:12:37.440 of follow their cycle and all the different things that 0:12:37.480 --> 0:12:39.679 happened from the moment you have your period, in times 0:12:39.679 --> 0:12:42.960 of your off your period to determine everything from what 0:12:43.080 --> 0:12:46.600 you eat to how much you get, how how much 0:12:46.640 --> 0:12:50.080 sleep you get, when you should work out. I mean, 0:12:50.520 --> 0:12:53.080 these are things that honestly, I have never been in 0:12:53.160 --> 0:12:56.880 touch with my body to that level, to where I 0:12:56.920 --> 0:13:00.200 allowed my body to dictate all of the things things 0:13:00.200 --> 0:13:02.920 that I did for myself, even down to my resting. 0:13:03.640 --> 0:13:06.600 And you know, to think that I'm a woman at 0:13:06.840 --> 0:13:11.200 at middle age where I am just now discovering some 0:13:11.240 --> 0:13:14.160 of those things and even in a more emotional way, 0:13:14.200 --> 0:13:17.520 in a more spiritual way, the choosing of the self, 0:13:17.559 --> 0:13:20.840 the listening to the self, the trusting the self, you know, 0:13:21.040 --> 0:13:24.200 And that was really intense for me. And I really 0:13:24.200 --> 0:13:26.440 thought that that that was, you know, just I'm so 0:13:26.520 --> 0:13:29.360 proud of the young girl. He's I called the young girls, 0:13:29.400 --> 0:13:32.559 the girls, whether you know, I'm so proud of them 0:13:32.600 --> 0:13:38.080 because they're bringing that into an actual daily practice much 0:13:38.240 --> 0:13:41.319 younger than I learned, and I'm still learning, so this 0:13:41.400 --> 0:13:50.280 is actually really new to me. And what of this stuff? 0:13:51.400 --> 0:13:54.160 They had a three inch thick cotton pad and a 0:13:54.320 --> 0:13:59.840 belt that you put together with safety pends. Safe depended 0:14:00.000 --> 0:14:06.120 of your panties. Oh I missed him? Yeah, yeah, can 0:14:06.160 --> 0:14:10.440 you imagine it is because of them? No, like we've 0:14:10.480 --> 0:14:13.400 come a mind along way. I just love that, just 0:14:13.600 --> 0:14:18.680 the concept that we are here and beginning finally really 0:14:18.720 --> 0:14:21.000 beginning to understand our bodies. And it's not just for 0:14:21.080 --> 0:14:25.440 which is it's not just for you know, duelus, you know, 0:14:25.600 --> 0:14:28.960 it's for all of us to have a good grasp 0:14:29.200 --> 0:14:32.360 of our bodies. And did y'all know they didn't even 0:14:32.440 --> 0:14:37.240 advertise pads on TV till nineteen seventies. I did nineteen 0:14:37.320 --> 0:14:44.720 sevent and him hit him. I went to all girls school, 0:14:44.960 --> 0:14:47.080 you know, I went to Philadelphia High School for girls 0:14:47.640 --> 0:14:50.960 and folks and just walk out with their tampon in 0:14:51.000 --> 0:14:53.200 their hand or their pad in their hands. You had 0:14:53.200 --> 0:14:55.400 a little bag that you had to put in your 0:14:55.400 --> 0:14:58.080 book back, you know, you carry that to the bathroom. 0:14:58.200 --> 0:15:00.760 Everybody in the school had a day on period, you 0:15:00.800 --> 0:15:03.760 know what I mean, pretty much almost all of the 0:15:03.800 --> 0:15:08.320 students had a cycle of some sort, and nonetheless we 0:15:08.320 --> 0:15:13.440 were still hiding it from each other. Right, yeah, here 0:15:13.440 --> 0:15:16.720 we are here. Now, we're out here now many many 0:15:17.000 --> 0:15:19.760 period apps. Now they're making sure they're keeping up with 0:15:20.120 --> 0:15:22.040 everything that's going on with us. That's where we are. 0:15:22.200 --> 0:15:25.080 I love it. Uh well, listen, I mean, you have 0:15:25.160 --> 0:15:27.600 to do what you have to do. And the health 0:15:27.680 --> 0:15:30.840 care aspect of it is so important. And again we're 0:15:30.840 --> 0:15:33.600 talking about things like you know, and we talk about 0:15:33.600 --> 0:15:35.880 her all the time, and we really I'm ashamed of 0:15:35.960 --> 0:15:37.920 us that we haven't had her on yet, the sister 0:15:38.000 --> 0:15:41.760 from the NA ministry, and that even down to us 0:15:41.880 --> 0:15:44.480 really getting into understanding how how much we need to 0:15:44.520 --> 0:15:47.360 rest that, I mean, just all of the ways that 0:15:47.400 --> 0:15:50.760 we are moving this whole conversation forward is amazing to me. 0:15:51.240 --> 0:15:53.720 And I want you. I don't even remember the name 0:15:53.760 --> 0:15:55.240 of that app though, like I know you were talking 0:15:55.280 --> 0:15:57.800 about it. It's called what is it called? Did you 0:15:57.880 --> 0:16:00.440 try it? Like? I have tried it. I have not 0:16:00.680 --> 0:16:03.200 done the higher levels yet, but yes I have tried it. 0:16:03.240 --> 0:16:05.360 I like it. Mind you, I already had a period 0:16:05.400 --> 0:16:07.760 of app But the difference between this one and mine 0:16:07.880 --> 0:16:10.680 is that it's just it's way more intricate into telling 0:16:10.720 --> 0:16:13.440 you the daily of how you should be expecting to 0:16:13.560 --> 0:16:16.000 feel and live and what you should be doing. That's 0:16:16.000 --> 0:16:18.000 why I did it, girl. I'm glad I didn't have 0:16:18.080 --> 0:16:20.280 this because my poor children probably might not have got 0:16:20.320 --> 0:16:23.600 born because that it was not for acts at not 0:16:23.720 --> 0:16:32.440 knowing nothing about cool. No, I'm joking, but still, I mean, well, 0:16:32.480 --> 0:16:35.120 you you know, you guys know that I'm kind of 0:16:35.160 --> 0:16:39.760 a unicorn in that way. That's right. Yeah, I spent 0:16:39.840 --> 0:16:43.800 eighteen years without a cycle, and is it and then 0:16:43.800 --> 0:16:47.320 it went regular, right, yeah, and then it went regular. 0:16:47.440 --> 0:16:51.440 Now it's it's whenever it feels like it. I can't 0:16:51.440 --> 0:16:54.400 count on it. You know, it comes when it once, 0:16:54.520 --> 0:16:57.520 It goes when it when it once. Wow, my mine 0:16:57.640 --> 0:17:02.680 is like clockwork right now. I'm unfortunately it is. Literally 0:17:03.200 --> 0:17:10.240 I could set everybody's timers beautiful. I don't know what's 0:17:10.280 --> 0:17:14.560 after having children, it just reverted back to some sort 0:17:14.600 --> 0:17:17.399 of seventeen year old cycle where it's just like bam, 0:17:17.520 --> 0:17:21.040 every twenty eight days, bow bow bow bow. Yeah. And 0:17:21.119 --> 0:17:23.800 I don't I don't that I'm not used to that, 0:17:23.880 --> 0:17:28.719 but it has it's it's rolling. It's a couple of 0:17:28.760 --> 0:17:32.119 months and I don't even blink like whole you know. 0:17:34.240 --> 0:17:36.240 I love that we are all three so different. I'm 0:17:36.280 --> 0:17:38.680 like even in this moment in this flow story because 0:17:38.680 --> 0:17:41.240 I'm like, yeah, this five broid cycle right here, child, 0:17:41.560 --> 0:17:44.800 I had my doctor said I'm gonna give you this bill. 0:17:45.080 --> 0:17:48.160 So did your your periods be lighter? Right? The catch? Well, 0:17:48.240 --> 0:17:50.879 she didn't tell me. The catch was she say, you 0:17:51.000 --> 0:17:53.080 was gonna have, um, like, three weeks of a period. 0:17:54.040 --> 0:17:55.600 We can talk after you. They had three weeks of 0:17:55.640 --> 0:17:58.560 a period on a vacation in Jamaica, and I was like, oh, 0:17:58.600 --> 0:18:02.040 it's lighter, thank you. Dr. However, I've been on this 0:18:02.119 --> 0:18:07.880 motherfucker for three weeks and so when does it go away? Oh? 0:18:07.920 --> 0:18:10.400 Shout out to the system. You know, it's all good. 0:18:10.720 --> 0:18:13.200 You know we figured out well. You know they're also 0:18:13.240 --> 0:18:16.479 talking about how came out. I saw a tweet, so 0:18:16.520 --> 0:18:17.840 I want to make sure i'd let y'all know I 0:18:17.880 --> 0:18:19.560 didn't read an article or a book. This is a 0:18:19.600 --> 0:18:23.760 tweet that was made about how that that common practice 0:18:23.800 --> 0:18:27.040 of giving teenage girls birth control pills to control things 0:18:27.080 --> 0:18:31.240 like acne and things like that has has has has 0:18:31.320 --> 0:18:34.280 been proven that there's lots of carcinogens and stuff like 0:18:34.320 --> 0:18:37.520 that have been I mean it's bad, like the implications, 0:18:37.560 --> 0:18:40.720 the long term health implications of that for a generation 0:18:40.800 --> 0:18:44.480 of girls, because you know that was commonplace when free samples, yea, 0:18:44.520 --> 0:18:46.200 they used the doctors. They had no problem giving free 0:18:46.200 --> 0:18:49.639 samples of birth control pills. What listen. I didn't listen. 0:18:49.960 --> 0:18:52.560 I wasn't afraid I was gonna get more titties. And 0:18:52.560 --> 0:18:55.399 I was like, oh my god, I don't want no 0:18:55.480 --> 0:19:00.680 more titties. Just please, I'll be I don't have a 0:19:00.760 --> 0:19:04.800 period anyway, kindly something three can all agree on. The 0:19:05.000 --> 0:19:08.440 Delicious Crew, I love it. That was. That was the reason. 0:19:09.840 --> 0:19:12.720 To the Delicious Crew, though, you give me birth control 0:19:12.760 --> 0:19:15.199 to get my cycle to regulate, And I was like, 0:19:15.240 --> 0:19:18.159 I'm cool. Does not have it? Man, I was like 0:19:18.200 --> 0:19:26.080 a pass forward going to wear white. Oh summer long. 0:19:26.680 --> 0:19:30.560 I'm just so jealous. I'm gonna tell you something. I've 0:19:30.560 --> 0:19:32.760 never been on birth control pills. The first birth control 0:19:32.800 --> 0:19:35.160 I was ever on was something that was actually pretty 0:19:35.160 --> 0:19:38.080 bad for women. Later on down the line, they realized 0:19:38.119 --> 0:19:40.560 was something called depot rivera, which is that I remember 0:19:40.680 --> 0:19:44.200 that the pill in the arm, right, Yeah, yeah, I 0:19:44.240 --> 0:19:48.119 was on that after my first or second one of 0:19:48.119 --> 0:19:52.840 those two. No, it was after my second child, because um, 0:19:52.880 --> 0:19:56.160 I was like, yeah, two kids is a lie. So 0:19:56.880 --> 0:20:01.959 I got one. Yeah, I got that, and my hair thinned, 0:20:02.480 --> 0:20:06.640 my eyesight got worse, and it took me no time 0:20:06.720 --> 0:20:08.760 to start to notice it. And I was like, yeah, 0:20:08.880 --> 0:20:11.000 I'm done with this, and let me tell you all 0:20:11.000 --> 0:20:13.040 what was the big gag. The big gag was they 0:20:13.040 --> 0:20:17.000 told me that, oh, it's such a strong medicine that 0:20:17.560 --> 0:20:19.959 you know, you don't have to worry about getting pregnant 0:20:19.960 --> 0:20:21.800 for at least a year. You can be off it 0:20:21.880 --> 0:20:25.360 for like a year. Girl, I got off that damn thing. 0:20:25.840 --> 0:20:29.639 Two months later I was pregnant. Yeah, and that was 0:20:29.680 --> 0:20:31.440 just baby three. I see you. I'm about to say 0:20:31.440 --> 0:20:37.160 any any that's why it Yeah, that's why. That's why 0:20:37.240 --> 0:20:39.480 Dea and Nina are the closest thing to stair step 0:20:39.480 --> 0:20:42.120 babies that I have. Out of the whole six, they're 0:20:42.119 --> 0:20:45.240 the closest. Is that the classy way of saying ghetto twins. 0:20:46.200 --> 0:20:52.399 First of all, I'm about to quit you again, cut her, 0:20:52.680 --> 0:20:57.000 cut her, cut her, Mike off step stairs, step Okay, 0:20:57.040 --> 0:21:03.960 I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I see it's the lack of 0:21:04.040 --> 0:21:08.080 filter for me that is about the proper, the proper, 0:21:08.119 --> 0:21:12.160 politically incorrect term you're looking for. It's Irish twins. Okay. 0:21:12.280 --> 0:21:14.640 So if you're gonna say something, if you're gonna say 0:21:14.640 --> 0:21:16.440 something foul, you're gonna say it about this white folks. 0:21:16.440 --> 0:21:18.679 You're gonna say about the black people who said that 0:21:18.680 --> 0:21:20.720 the ghetto got to do with black folks. It ain't 0:21:20.760 --> 0:21:26.480 start with black folks. You got Irish. Come on, now, 0:21:27.440 --> 0:21:31.560 you got me o that and you're right and you're 0:21:31.640 --> 0:21:34.040 right and I'm wrong. How about that you are right 0:21:34.080 --> 0:21:36.919 and I'm wrong? One time? Ever, I'm gonna take this. 0:21:36.920 --> 0:21:38.439 I'm gonna take this time, and I'm gonna put my 0:21:38.440 --> 0:21:43.760 head down. Yes, no, no, no, no, because because silence. Yes, 0:21:46.359 --> 0:21:48.320 it's just highly educated people. I don't know if y'all 0:21:48.359 --> 0:21:54.399 know this. I'm just saying so I know it. No. No. 0:21:54.560 --> 0:21:56.560 The reason why I had to acknowledge is because it 0:21:56.680 --> 0:22:00.119 was so dead wrong to equate blackness with ghetto this 0:22:00.480 --> 0:22:02.720 that I just was like, oh, that is so foul. Agent. 0:22:02.960 --> 0:22:05.960 You us have to actually take responsibility for that. That 0:22:06.119 --> 0:22:09.879 is foul. It was almost my point is it was 0:22:09.960 --> 0:22:13.280 almost a trap. But yeah, no, the girls. The girls 0:22:13.280 --> 0:22:15.720 are really close together because like you know, it's just 0:22:15.800 --> 0:22:18.560 like and it's so hard to navigate this stuff like 0:22:18.600 --> 0:22:21.800 for for for like uter in health stuff like and 0:22:21.800 --> 0:22:27.360 and and that girl and having babies and stuff, oh, 0:22:27.560 --> 0:22:32.400 having babies and everything. Oh my god, like you called 0:22:32.480 --> 0:22:34.840 this situation. Don't know even some women have never even 0:22:34.840 --> 0:22:38.400 seen their own servis you got a whole human being 0:22:39.000 --> 0:22:40.560 of this thing, and you've never even seen it. I'm 0:22:40.560 --> 0:22:48.800 supposed to have seen you. Have you seen You've had 0:22:48.800 --> 0:22:53.680 a speculum, right, They've been going in there and open 0:22:54.119 --> 0:22:56.200 the next time they go and look at it. Asked 0:22:56.240 --> 0:22:58.240 them for a mirror and show you what it looked like. 0:22:58.320 --> 0:23:01.840 I'm scared what I'm taking out. Okay, okay, okay, you 0:23:01.880 --> 0:23:04.720 said you you made a little statement about your fist. Yeah, 0:23:04.840 --> 0:23:07.480 your vagina don't look like this, But that's what they 0:23:07.480 --> 0:23:10.520 told me. That's why I did that. Okay, I'm gonna 0:23:10.520 --> 0:23:12.520 I'm gonna try that. Oh my god, you mean a 0:23:12.560 --> 0:23:14.840 picture of while you're getting a pop smear of pelvic? 0:23:15.080 --> 0:23:17.720 Oh lord, y'all did that? Am I the only person 0:23:17.720 --> 0:23:21.520 who's never did that? It wasn't my choice. Mirror, it 0:23:21.600 --> 0:23:23.960 wasn't my choice. And doctor was like my wife, and 0:23:24.000 --> 0:23:26.520 I was like, oh yeah, it wasn't something that I 0:23:26.600 --> 0:23:29.240 necessarily wanted to be prepared. It's making me sweat just 0:23:29.240 --> 0:23:36.359 thinking about it. But the fascinating We're gonna take a 0:23:36.440 --> 0:23:49.040 quick break and then we'll be right back. Think about 0:23:49.080 --> 0:23:52.280 all of this time, all of this time that women 0:23:52.320 --> 0:23:56.359 have not been aware of themselves, all of all of 0:23:56.400 --> 0:23:59.240 this time, all of this time not knowing how to 0:23:59.320 --> 0:24:02.760 have an orgasm, not not not understanding that there's nothing 0:24:02.760 --> 0:24:07.800 wrong with your pleasure. Um, how many women suffered, you know, 0:24:08.040 --> 0:24:10.040 just because it didn't understand it. It It was supposed to 0:24:10.040 --> 0:24:14.879 be mutually beneficial sex and and and sexuality is supposed 0:24:14.880 --> 0:24:17.320 to mutually beneficial. So here we are in a state 0:24:18.040 --> 0:24:23.200 of being where we get to understand more about ourselves, 0:24:23.280 --> 0:24:26.760 about what we want, about what feels good, and being 0:24:26.800 --> 0:24:29.040 able to say that this, this doesn't give me pleasure. 0:24:29.520 --> 0:24:33.200 How many women suffered in marriages where they hated having 0:24:33.240 --> 0:24:37.239 sex with their husband, you know, just hated it and 0:24:37.280 --> 0:24:39.840 couldn't even find the words to to say why it was. 0:24:39.920 --> 0:24:44.080 So you know, um, I have a girlfriend actually, Um, 0:24:44.240 --> 0:24:47.600 who who really beautiful. Her husband is really beautiful as well. 0:24:48.040 --> 0:24:51.400 Oh my god, they're gorgeous. But sex is very painful 0:24:51.440 --> 0:24:55.199 for her, very very painful for her. I don't know 0:24:55.240 --> 0:24:58.000