1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:08,360 Speaker 1: Hi there, um. I'm calling because I'm trying to track 2 00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:12,000 Speaker 1: down some information about my mother's partner who died in 3 00:00:12,840 --> 00:00:16,319 Speaker 1: two My mom has been waiting thirty seven years to 4 00:00:16,360 --> 00:00:20,560 Speaker 1: say goodbye to Billy. I guess my questions she They 5 00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:23,080 Speaker 1: called her to identify the body. She came back back 6 00:00:23,079 --> 00:00:26,479 Speaker 1: in the summer of nine two. My mom says after 7 00:00:26,520 --> 00:00:29,960 Speaker 1: she went to identify Billy's body, she learned that without 8 00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:33,040 Speaker 1: her permission, he'd been sent to a cemetery where people 9 00:00:33,080 --> 00:00:36,279 Speaker 1: are buried in mass graves by the city and they said, oh, 10 00:00:36,320 --> 00:00:39,040 Speaker 1: we send him to a potter's field. She never knew where. 11 00:00:39,880 --> 00:00:41,640 Speaker 1: So I'm on the phone with the Office of the 12 00:00:41,720 --> 00:00:45,800 Speaker 1: Chief Medical Examiner here in New York. Under what circumstances 13 00:00:45,840 --> 00:00:48,960 Speaker 1: would a body be sent to a potter's field? From you, guys, 14 00:00:50,560 --> 00:00:55,760 Speaker 1: if we were unable to contact any family members or friends, 15 00:00:55,880 --> 00:00:58,800 Speaker 1: or no one came forward to make arrangements for a person, 16 00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:02,200 Speaker 1: or if we did reach someone and they made the 17 00:01:02,280 --> 00:01:05,160 Speaker 1: request to have the person buried at the city cemetery 18 00:01:05,200 --> 00:01:10,680 Speaker 1: on Hart Island, Hard Island. So Hard Island is the 19 00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:16,800 Speaker 1: potter's field for the city of New York. According to 20 00:01:16,840 --> 00:01:20,280 Speaker 1: the Medical Examiner's Office, Billy has to be buried on 21 00:01:20,360 --> 00:01:24,120 Speaker 1: Hart Island. The only problem is when I searched the 22 00:01:24,120 --> 00:01:29,320 Speaker 1: city's Heart Island database, Heightsman nothing, William Heightsman nothing. There 23 00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:36,080 Speaker 1: is no William Heightsman. But then what's going on? What 24 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:43,199 Speaker 1: it's the Hard Island look Up Service. Look Heightman, William 25 00:01:43,400 --> 00:01:47,560 Speaker 1: thirty seven years old. Date of death June two at 26 00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:52,120 Speaker 1: Cabrini Medical Center. He's buried at plot number one thirty six. 27 00:01:53,520 --> 00:02:06,200 Speaker 1: I just fucking found Billy Heightman. There's no z and 28 00:02:06,240 --> 00:02:07,840 Speaker 1: that's why we haven't been able to find him this 29 00:02:07,880 --> 00:02:12,400 Speaker 1: whole time. Oh my god, this whole thing was just 30 00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:24,040 Speaker 1: a misspelling. I fucking found Billy today on the show 31 00:02:25,160 --> 00:02:30,160 Speaker 1: Heart Island from Crime Town. I'm io till it right, 32 00:02:30,680 --> 00:02:44,840 Speaker 1: and this is the ballad of Billy Balls. I got 33 00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:49,400 Speaker 1: the number of the Potter's Field and on the other 34 00:02:49,560 --> 00:02:54,560 Speaker 1: end it was the Great Diggers, and I says, where 35 00:02:54,760 --> 00:03:00,000 Speaker 1: is the body of William Heitzman? And they laughed, they laughed. 36 00:03:04,760 --> 00:03:10,640 Speaker 1: I remember just the raw feeling of the fucking pain 37 00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:15,480 Speaker 1: of I agree, and I would like to not remember 38 00:03:15,520 --> 00:03:18,360 Speaker 1: that feeling. Quiz. The only thing this stopped it was 39 00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:28,440 Speaker 1: you being born? All right, We're gonna find that, We're 40 00:03:28,480 --> 00:03:53,160 Speaker 1: gonna find Okay, okay, Chapter eleven, there's someone under this ground. Well, 41 00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:55,760 Speaker 1: not too far away from the bright and dazzling lights 42 00:03:55,760 --> 00:03:58,600 Speaker 1: of Times Square in the New York City skyline lines 43 00:03:58,680 --> 00:04:03,080 Speaker 1: one of America's darkest secrets. Almost one million people buried 44 00:04:03,080 --> 00:04:06,600 Speaker 1: here since the eighteen hundreds on just over one d acres. 45 00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:09,360 Speaker 1: Potter's failed on. Heart Island is a small patch of 46 00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:14,720 Speaker 1: land in the easternmost parts of the Bronx. Can you 47 00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:23,080 Speaker 1: describe physically what Heart Island looks and feels and sounds like? Oh, 48 00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:26,880 Speaker 1: it's it's the least developed part of New York City, right, 49 00:04:26,960 --> 00:04:34,760 Speaker 1: so it's truly this rural landscape. Melinda Hunt is an 50 00:04:34,839 --> 00:04:37,800 Speaker 1: artist and the founding director of the Heart Island Project, 51 00:04:38,120 --> 00:04:42,000 Speaker 1: a nonprofit working the catalog and tell the stories of 52 00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:45,400 Speaker 1: the people buried there. She spent a lot of time 53 00:04:45,440 --> 00:04:50,159 Speaker 1: on the island. There aren't any markers, so it doesn't 54 00:04:50,279 --> 00:04:54,560 Speaker 1: feel like what we call a traditional cemetery private cemetery, right, 55 00:04:54,600 --> 00:04:57,600 Speaker 1: because there aren't all these markers. So it's just it's 56 00:04:57,640 --> 00:05:01,400 Speaker 1: a bird sanctuary. There's herds of de here, as these 57 00:05:01,480 --> 00:05:05,719 Speaker 1: red raccoons. It's just all this wildlife there because people 58 00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:08,800 Speaker 1: aren't there very much, and you're out in the Long 59 00:05:08,839 --> 00:05:12,480 Speaker 1: Island Sound that sailboats going by, and it's just this 60 00:05:12,920 --> 00:05:16,880 Speaker 1: really meaningful place because so many people are buried there. 61 00:05:18,120 --> 00:05:22,920 Speaker 1: It's actually the country's largest natural burial ground, and it's 62 00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:27,279 Speaker 1: a very sustainable ecological system of burials, except that it's 63 00:05:27,320 --> 00:05:33,440 Speaker 1: managed by the penal system, which isn't very interested in ecology. 64 00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:39,279 Speaker 1: Heart Island is run by the Department of Correction, the 65 00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:44,360 Speaker 1: agency best known for overseeing the city's prisons. Over the years, 66 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:47,480 Speaker 1: it was home to a missile base, an insane asylum, 67 00:05:47,839 --> 00:05:53,960 Speaker 1: and a tuberculosis hospital, but the island only housed abandoned 68 00:05:53,960 --> 00:06:00,120 Speaker 1: buildings and dead bodies. So when a body leaves a 69 00:06:00,240 --> 00:06:05,680 Speaker 1: hospital and goes to Heart Island, who buries it? How 70 00:06:05,839 --> 00:06:08,359 Speaker 1: is How does it get there? What is the process 71 00:06:08,400 --> 00:06:13,400 Speaker 1: of entry? For a billy. The body is put in 72 00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:18,880 Speaker 1: the pine box at the morgue and loaded into a 73 00:06:19,360 --> 00:06:25,400 Speaker 1: refrigerator truck and driven to Heart Island, And the moment 74 00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:30,920 Speaker 1: that vehicle drives onto Heart Island, all of those bodies 75 00:06:31,200 --> 00:06:36,520 Speaker 1: become property of the Department of Correction, And so they 76 00:06:36,680 --> 00:06:41,240 Speaker 1: drive to the grave site and a bus of prisoners 77 00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:46,480 Speaker 1: arrives at the grave site. They dig these gigantic trenches 78 00:06:47,320 --> 00:06:52,120 Speaker 1: where you put people in an organized trench. It's a grid. 79 00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:58,479 Speaker 1: So that's how it's done. Inmates from Rikers Islands, a 80 00:06:58,560 --> 00:07:02,760 Speaker 1: nearby jail, did the trenches and bury the bodies. I 81 00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:06,400 Speaker 1: was in five months in Hot Island and I buried 82 00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:12,280 Speaker 1: well over seven hundred bodies. And that's not even you're 83 00:07:12,480 --> 00:07:16,280 Speaker 1: gonna say babies. This is a former Riker's inmate who 84 00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:19,840 Speaker 1: Melinda interviewed for a documentary she made called Heart Island 85 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:26,600 Speaker 1: is an American Cemetery. We were like the elite crew 86 00:07:28,640 --> 00:07:30,360 Speaker 1: and there would be people that would get on that, 87 00:07:30,680 --> 00:07:33,480 Speaker 1: you know, on that detail, and they would show up 88 00:07:33,480 --> 00:07:37,320 Speaker 1: one day and they would quit, Uh, just say they 89 00:07:37,320 --> 00:07:41,320 Speaker 1: couldn't do it, you know, because it wasn't so easy, 90 00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:46,240 Speaker 1: you know, took a lot of you know, I mean, 91 00:07:46,360 --> 00:07:58,040 Speaker 1: they were dead people. It's inherently shameful to have prisoners burying. 92 00:07:58,040 --> 00:08:01,600 Speaker 1: The dad Melinda say, is that because the Department of 93 00:08:01,600 --> 00:08:05,160 Speaker 1: Correction or d C is in charge of Heart Island, 94 00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:08,160 Speaker 1: there's a shroud of shame around it and the people 95 00:08:08,240 --> 00:08:12,880 Speaker 1: buried there. That's the purpose of the penal system. It's 96 00:08:12,880 --> 00:08:19,640 Speaker 1: a deterrent based on shame, and so the shame creates 97 00:08:20,280 --> 00:08:24,600 Speaker 1: um stigma. You can't celebrate a life if it's tainted. 98 00:08:25,320 --> 00:08:27,000 Speaker 1: You're not going to go out say oh, this person 99 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:29,200 Speaker 1: is such a great person, and yeah, they were buried 100 00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:31,679 Speaker 1: by the d C. It's just that those two things 101 00:08:31,760 --> 00:08:37,760 Speaker 1: don't go together. Let's say you're in the position of 102 00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:40,560 Speaker 1: my mother. You are the long term life partner but 103 00:08:40,640 --> 00:08:43,960 Speaker 1: not legally recognized life partner of someone. Can you walk 104 00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:47,160 Speaker 1: us through the process of what would have happened and 105 00:08:47,240 --> 00:08:51,560 Speaker 1: like kind of what she would have encountered. Um, Well, 106 00:08:51,559 --> 00:08:56,360 Speaker 1: if she went to identify she was providing a service 107 00:08:56,440 --> 00:09:00,080 Speaker 1: to the city and then told well, but you have 108 00:09:00,160 --> 00:09:03,560 Speaker 1: no further rights, and my mother would not have had 109 00:09:03,640 --> 00:09:08,120 Speaker 1: the right to claim his body, not in n Basically, 110 00:09:09,280 --> 00:09:11,920 Speaker 1: the city would have tried to find it next of kin, 111 00:09:12,960 --> 00:09:15,640 Speaker 1: and they probably already tried to do that when he 112 00:09:15,720 --> 00:09:19,679 Speaker 1: was at Cabrini. We have a theory about how this 113 00:09:19,760 --> 00:09:23,880 Speaker 1: might have gone down. I asked Billy's daughter Amanda about 114 00:09:23,920 --> 00:09:28,600 Speaker 1: it the first time we met. She did say, which 115 00:09:28,640 --> 00:09:32,840 Speaker 1: I think is a really important big clue, but the 116 00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:38,400 Speaker 1: Morgue did call her grandma when Billy died because Amanda 117 00:09:38,520 --> 00:09:42,160 Speaker 1: is technically the next of kin. She was seven, so 118 00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:44,200 Speaker 1: the grandma didn't want anything to do with it and 119 00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:49,160 Speaker 1: told him to funk off. As her legal guardian. Amanda's 120 00:09:49,160 --> 00:09:51,800 Speaker 1: grandmother did have the right to make the decision that 121 00:09:51,920 --> 00:09:58,840 Speaker 1: sent Billy to Heart Island. My mom, as Billy's longtime girlfriend, 122 00:09:59,320 --> 00:10:03,560 Speaker 1: didn't have egal rights to him in and based on 123 00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:06,480 Speaker 1: the Heart Island rules, I'm not sure she has the 124 00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:09,840 Speaker 1: right to visit him today near Kitty Department of Corrections, 125 00:10:09,880 --> 00:10:15,520 Speaker 1: Hart Island either. Um. I'm calling because my mother is 126 00:10:15,559 --> 00:10:19,079 Speaker 1: the long term partner of somebody who we believe is 127 00:10:19,120 --> 00:10:22,920 Speaker 1: buried on Heart Island, but they were not legally married. Um, 128 00:10:22,960 --> 00:10:25,600 Speaker 1: and I'm trying to figure out how I can get 129 00:10:25,640 --> 00:10:30,200 Speaker 1: her onto the island to finally say goodbye to him. 130 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:35,400 Speaker 1: She can just or you can request for visit. We 131 00:10:35,440 --> 00:10:40,440 Speaker 1: don't ask for proof and friends do visit, Oh their friends, 132 00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:48,800 Speaker 1: you know. Not to discredit her. God, that's so humane, 133 00:10:48,880 --> 00:10:53,600 Speaker 1: that's so and so unexpected from the DC to me 134 00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:55,800 Speaker 1: scheduling a physic she was more like his wife if 135 00:10:55,800 --> 00:10:58,480 Speaker 1: they were together for a long time, So I would 136 00:10:58,480 --> 00:11:02,200 Speaker 1: definitely schedule her for family or loved one type visit 137 00:11:02,200 --> 00:11:05,320 Speaker 1: where she would just go and actually stand where he 138 00:11:05,480 --> 00:11:08,480 Speaker 1: or she is in grieve and mourn in that way. 139 00:11:08,559 --> 00:11:11,120 Speaker 1: And that's just a call that you're able to make, 140 00:11:11,760 --> 00:11:16,960 Speaker 1: right exactly. We have to trust that there was a 141 00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:23,439 Speaker 1: relationship and that she would want to be clothed. Wow. Okay, 142 00:11:23,559 --> 00:11:27,800 Speaker 1: what is your name? Mrs Calvert? Wow? Ms Calvert? Thank 143 00:11:27,840 --> 00:11:30,720 Speaker 1: you a million times over. Thank you, thank you, thank you, 144 00:11:30,760 --> 00:11:35,800 Speaker 1: No problem. You guys have a great day too. Wow. 145 00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:43,240 Speaker 1: Whoa dude? What? I cannot believe what just happened. I 146 00:11:43,280 --> 00:11:45,959 Speaker 1: can't believe what has happened. You realize what this means, right? 147 00:11:46,760 --> 00:11:50,920 Speaker 1: This means there's no obstacle to my mother getting to 148 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:53,080 Speaker 1: say goodbye to the love of her life, which she 149 00:11:53,160 --> 00:11:56,360 Speaker 1: has been waiting to do for thirty seven fucking years. 150 00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:02,400 Speaker 1: What are we doing right now? Where are we going? 151 00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:06,400 Speaker 1: We're walking to my mom's house, where I'm going to 152 00:12:06,480 --> 00:12:10,080 Speaker 1: tell her that I found Billy's body and that she 153 00:12:10,200 --> 00:12:13,240 Speaker 1: can go visit him with no restrictions. Today is just 154 00:12:13,320 --> 00:12:16,240 Speaker 1: about telling my mom that we found Billy. I'm not 155 00:12:16,280 --> 00:12:18,280 Speaker 1: going to hit her with the police report or push 156 00:12:18,280 --> 00:12:21,040 Speaker 1: her for any information. I just want to give her 157 00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:29,400 Speaker 1: a chance to process this. It's big I'm away. I'm 158 00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:33,680 Speaker 1: so happy to see you, Mark Mine. Look at you 159 00:12:33,760 --> 00:12:37,600 Speaker 1: a little pastel colors. Oh god, my mom doesn't know 160 00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:45,000 Speaker 1: why I'm here. I asked her to sit down, but anyway, goad, um, 161 00:12:45,040 --> 00:12:53,440 Speaker 1: well I have I have some some news. Yes, I 162 00:12:53,520 --> 00:13:01,360 Speaker 1: found Billy's body. Oh my god. She clenches my hand 163 00:13:01,559 --> 00:13:04,120 Speaker 1: as she closes her eyes and puts her head down. 164 00:13:06,520 --> 00:13:13,320 Speaker 1: He's on hard Island. I'm like, having what kinds of 165 00:13:15,520 --> 00:13:25,839 Speaker 1: just take it very fucking slow. Yeah. Yeah, you can 166 00:13:25,880 --> 00:13:30,760 Speaker 1: go see him many time you want see. We'll visit 167 00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:39,640 Speaker 1: his area. It's great. Okay, Okay, you're squeezing my hand 168 00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:53,880 Speaker 1: really tight right now, Oh my god. Yeah, okay, mm hmm. Yeah. 169 00:13:55,720 --> 00:14:00,319 Speaker 1: If something's open forever and nothing is ever final, eyes 170 00:14:00,559 --> 00:14:06,600 Speaker 1: or or people don't come together to go through this 171 00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:12,360 Speaker 1: ritual and the ceremony thing, something's just not right. Maybe 172 00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:18,160 Speaker 1: it's kind of on a metaphysical plane. I don't know 173 00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:22,000 Speaker 1: how to fucking talk about it, but something's been eating me, 174 00:14:22,200 --> 00:14:24,800 Speaker 1: and that's what it is. It's just one of those things. 175 00:14:24,840 --> 00:14:30,120 Speaker 1: You gotta do it, that's all you feel like. Maybe 176 00:14:30,160 --> 00:14:35,320 Speaker 1: it will let you and us close the chapter and 177 00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:43,920 Speaker 1: start something new. Probably, I hope so I'm ready to go. 178 00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:47,840 Speaker 1: My bag is fucking packed for a few years now, 179 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:57,320 Speaker 1: you know. So I'm sorry what you heard? What I says? 180 00:14:57,760 --> 00:15:02,760 Speaker 1: Where are you going? I'm need to go to where wherever? 181 00:15:02,840 --> 00:15:14,720 Speaker 1: We're gonna go next. Next we're going to Heart Island. 182 00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:34,960 Speaker 1: That's after the breaks. Oh there she is right there. Okay. 183 00:15:33,160 --> 00:15:40,120 Speaker 1: Hold on a hazy spring morning Austin, My fiance Rachel 184 00:15:40,160 --> 00:15:44,160 Speaker 1: and I picked my mom up at her apartment. Hey, 185 00:15:44,240 --> 00:15:46,800 Speaker 1: my boy, Hey mama, We're about to drive to the 186 00:15:46,840 --> 00:15:50,560 Speaker 1: Bronx to catch a ferry to Heart Island. It's nice 187 00:15:50,600 --> 00:15:54,400 Speaker 1: as being her. My mom's dressed all in black with 188 00:15:54,480 --> 00:15:58,760 Speaker 1: big sunglasses covering her face. She's wearing her nicest pants, 189 00:15:59,160 --> 00:16:11,200 Speaker 1: high heels, and a knee length coat. Jasha looks good. Mom. Wow, 190 00:16:11,240 --> 00:16:19,320 Speaker 1: it's a foggy days creepy it just got off Yeah wow, 191 00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:29,680 Speaker 1: Oh my god, it's total London fog. After a half 192 00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:33,320 Speaker 1: hour drive, we find ourselves at a place called City Island. 193 00:16:33,880 --> 00:16:40,680 Speaker 1: The ferry to Heart Island leaves from here. Salt Air. 194 00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:49,120 Speaker 1: Nice it is, huh. It's basically like a suburban fishing town. 195 00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:54,800 Speaker 1: It's a quaint little village vibe, but everything is covered 196 00:16:54,920 --> 00:17:01,120 Speaker 1: in mist. My mom carry is with her a white 197 00:17:01,280 --> 00:17:06,720 Speaker 1: envelope that she plans to bring to Billy. I'm smuggling possible. 198 00:17:06,720 --> 00:17:13,480 Speaker 1: They're worry. We walked towards a dock that's fenced off 199 00:17:13,520 --> 00:17:19,520 Speaker 1: and locked, and there's a big Department of Corrections badge 200 00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:23,639 Speaker 1: logo and it says restricted area. It also has a 201 00:17:23,680 --> 00:17:28,400 Speaker 1: big sign that says end the fucking end of the line. Man, 202 00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:40,840 Speaker 1: Oh God, hold my hand, my body. The mist is 203 00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:45,600 Speaker 1: so thick we can't see anything past the dock. A 204 00:17:45,680 --> 00:17:48,800 Speaker 1: man in a city uniform approaches from the other side 205 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:57,760 Speaker 1: of the fence. Good morning. The fence slides open and 206 00:17:57,840 --> 00:18:01,320 Speaker 1: we walk onto an old dock with wide wooden planks. 207 00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:05,879 Speaker 1: We sign in for the visit as the sky brightens. Yeah, 208 00:18:06,119 --> 00:18:09,840 Speaker 1: oh wow, wow. The fog just cleared, and the island 209 00:18:09,920 --> 00:18:12,800 Speaker 1: is suddenly like I could probably throw a baseball to it. 210 00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:17,040 Speaker 1: The mist starts to rise and we see Heart Island 211 00:18:17,359 --> 00:18:21,639 Speaker 1: for the first time, a narrow strip of land covered 212 00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:26,639 Speaker 1: in barren trees. How how are you doing? Mom'm fucked up? 213 00:18:26,680 --> 00:18:30,360 Speaker 1: What do you think? You know? It's the look at 214 00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:33,480 Speaker 1: these weird little islands and you want to swim there, 215 00:18:33,520 --> 00:18:37,360 Speaker 1: you know, I don't want to swim to that place. Uh, 216 00:18:40,880 --> 00:18:45,399 Speaker 1: what once you have to do with the recording device? Please? 217 00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:52,000 Speaker 1: Is please? Now Austin has to put his mic back 218 00:18:52,040 --> 00:18:58,920 Speaker 1: in the car. But I'm wearing a wire, I'm sure 219 00:18:59,040 --> 00:19:02,000 Speaker 1: not sending it off. To put it off, we walk 220 00:19:02,080 --> 00:19:05,240 Speaker 1: onto an industrial looking fairy with a crowd of about 221 00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:12,919 Speaker 1: fifteen other people visiting loved ones. The boat inches towards 222 00:19:12,960 --> 00:19:17,600 Speaker 1: the island. I just can't believe how horror movie esque 223 00:19:17,760 --> 00:19:23,919 Speaker 1: it is. An island of dead people, hundred feet away 224 00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:27,760 Speaker 1: from an island of living people, all abandoned, and it's 225 00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:32,880 Speaker 1: literally coated and missed. It's just like I imagined that. 226 00:19:35,520 --> 00:19:41,600 Speaker 1: In just a few minutes, we've arrived. The dock workers 227 00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:45,959 Speaker 1: secure the ferry. We were all said, folks get Dotting 228 00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:50,520 Speaker 1: the shoreline are little Catholic statues, baby angels, and a 229 00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:56,960 Speaker 1: Virgin Mary, all painted white, stare at us as we disembark. 230 00:19:57,080 --> 00:20:00,760 Speaker 1: My mom is silent. She's flanked herself with my fiance 231 00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:05,760 Speaker 1: Rachel and me and clutches both of our hands. Ahead 232 00:20:05,960 --> 00:20:09,800 Speaker 1: is a big white bus with corrections stamped along the side. 233 00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:15,320 Speaker 1: Got to get on the corrections the white bus. Wow, 234 00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:26,240 Speaker 1: wherever you want a cup? The island is devastating around 235 00:20:26,359 --> 00:20:30,800 Speaker 1: us or half crumbled brick and plaster buildings. An old 236 00:20:30,880 --> 00:20:34,800 Speaker 1: boat sits rotting, a crow has nested on top of 237 00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:40,040 Speaker 1: a dilapidated shed. Everything feels dead except the animals that 238 00:20:40,119 --> 00:20:43,520 Speaker 1: run wild here you do. Canadians on the island are 239 00:20:43,560 --> 00:20:46,800 Speaker 1: Canadian geese, so you can see them. She's a nesting season. 240 00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:52,719 Speaker 1: They get quite aggressive. The bus creeps forward. It's the 241 00:20:52,720 --> 00:20:57,639 Speaker 1: north end of the island and got it. The trees 242 00:20:57,680 --> 00:21:00,840 Speaker 1: look like tim Burton trees the like reach out in 243 00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:07,080 Speaker 1: every direction, rounding a corner. We come to an open 244 00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:11,520 Speaker 1: field with little white concrete blocks placed every twenty ft 245 00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:19,960 Speaker 1: or so marking a rudimentary grid. We're here. What do 246 00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:21,440 Speaker 1: you want, mom? You want us to go with you? 247 00:21:21,440 --> 00:21:22,600 Speaker 1: You want to go in her? You want us to 248 00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:42,520 Speaker 1: go with you? Right? Yeah, mama, Okay, this was a 249 00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:46,840 Speaker 1: surprisingly gentle corrections officer leads us off the bus and 250 00:21:46,920 --> 00:21:50,280 Speaker 1: into a muddy field. It sits just next to a 251 00:21:50,359 --> 00:21:54,760 Speaker 1: rocky beach where large pieces of trash, plastic bins, and 252 00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:57,520 Speaker 1: wooden crates have washed up. You're going to be good 253 00:21:57,520 --> 00:21:59,639 Speaker 1: with those heels in the soft earth. I don't know 254 00:22:00,280 --> 00:22:03,840 Speaker 1: I got your flip pops if you need them. My 255 00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:07,560 Speaker 1: mom's heels sink into the ground as the officer consults 256 00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:12,119 Speaker 1: a cemetery diagram and settles on a spot. He says, 257 00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:15,960 Speaker 1: Billy is roughly in this area, under the patchy grass 258 00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:23,359 Speaker 1: right there. Is it this way or that way? So 259 00:22:23,480 --> 00:22:30,000 Speaker 1: he's right here. Thank you, thank you. He says he 260 00:22:30,119 --> 00:22:32,960 Speaker 1: thinks Billy's head is pointing in the direction of the water. 261 00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:37,520 Speaker 1: He apologizes for our loss and ambles towards the beach, 262 00:22:38,080 --> 00:22:42,479 Speaker 1: leaving us in privacy. Rachel and I clear the bottle 263 00:22:42,560 --> 00:22:46,280 Speaker 1: caps and trash that the tide has washed up over Billy. 264 00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:53,160 Speaker 1: My mom stares at the mulchy earth so um roll 265 00:22:53,240 --> 00:22:59,440 Speaker 1: that there's someone under this ground and you would never 266 00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:08,440 Speaker 1: know it. And her She takes out that white envelope 267 00:23:08,440 --> 00:23:13,679 Speaker 1: she smuggled in. It's filled with seeds or planting some 268 00:23:13,680 --> 00:23:20,919 Speaker 1: some flowers. Break them up. Okay, the season, you know 269 00:23:20,960 --> 00:23:26,360 Speaker 1: you gotta break them like this. Okay. She bends over 270 00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:30,199 Speaker 1: at the waist and starts ripping back the grass. My 271 00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:34,359 Speaker 1: mom is digging with her fingers into the earth. Not 272 00:23:34,560 --> 00:23:36,960 Speaker 1: more and more and more. You want to give me 273 00:23:37,040 --> 00:23:44,280 Speaker 1: some more? Yeah, just cover cover, cover him with flour. 274 00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:54,520 Speaker 1: My mom is digging with her fingers. It looks as 275 00:23:54,520 --> 00:23:58,119 Speaker 1: though she's caressing Billy's chest and she's digging right on 276 00:23:58,200 --> 00:24:02,360 Speaker 1: top of where they said his chest would be. She's 277 00:24:02,400 --> 00:24:07,560 Speaker 1: digging with her fingers. I feel like I could just 278 00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:25,840 Speaker 1: keep going in there. He's gonna be right there. The birds, 279 00:24:25,840 --> 00:24:32,560 Speaker 1: and I say, it sounds as the birds you want 280 00:24:32,560 --> 00:24:35,280 Speaker 1: to leave you alone for a minute with them. Yeah, 281 00:24:35,280 --> 00:24:40,719 Speaker 1: you could leave me alone for just a few minutes. Maybe. 282 00:24:41,320 --> 00:24:44,280 Speaker 1: I love your mama. I love you too, Go too far, 283 00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:57,359 Speaker 1: We'll be right here. I've been around bird why it 284 00:24:57,480 --> 00:24:59,840 Speaker 1: was all my life when I was drawing up my brother. 285 00:25:00,240 --> 00:25:05,320 Speaker 1: Birds always really mostly harmless. Will birds are all over? 286 00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:18,960 Speaker 1: Where do you keep a whispers? Isn't bad pronounced aviary? 287 00:25:43,760 --> 00:25:55,479 Speaker 1: I'm just calling me owhere? Okay, I don't know. I 288 00:25:55,480 --> 00:26:05,960 Speaker 1: don't I don't know. M Are you happy with cane um? 289 00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:09,359 Speaker 1: I guess it's just something that you gotta do. You know, 290 00:26:11,600 --> 00:26:15,040 Speaker 1: I wish he wasn't fucking dead. If what he is, 291 00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:31,240 Speaker 1: he's dead, you know? Yeah, Oh, this is so so creepy. 292 00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:37,040 Speaker 1: You feel like this puts an end to something, knowing 293 00:26:37,080 --> 00:26:39,760 Speaker 1: where he is, having found him, and I don't know, 294 00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:46,359 Speaker 1: it's just creepy. I I don't know what to say. 295 00:26:46,400 --> 00:26:51,639 Speaker 1: I can't talk about it. I don't know the answer 296 00:26:51,680 --> 00:26:56,640 Speaker 1: to anything. Okay. In fact, I woke up today realizing 297 00:26:57,680 --> 00:27:01,880 Speaker 1: that I'm completely still food and that I don't know 298 00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:06,560 Speaker 1: the answer to anything. What are you talking about? I 299 00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:11,000 Speaker 1: don't know. Don't ask me any more questions. That's what 300 00:27:11,040 --> 00:27:17,720 Speaker 1: I'm talking about. I always said he could just count 301 00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:25,520 Speaker 1: with that. Yeah. Ah, he wants to go with us 302 00:27:25,600 --> 00:27:47,359 Speaker 1: till his spirit let's go. Okay, how you know, my mom? 303 00:27:47,359 --> 00:27:54,080 Speaker 1: I feel worse than ever now. Ah, like my gouts 304 00:27:54,119 --> 00:27:58,399 Speaker 1: are being scraped off from the inside. I don't know. 305 00:27:58,440 --> 00:28:02,240 Speaker 1: I told you, just don't ask me anything. I don't 306 00:28:02,359 --> 00:28:12,879 Speaker 1: know anything. I'm sorry you feel that my mom suity 307 00:28:12,960 --> 00:28:42,320 Speaker 1: don't great? All right? Bye? Bye? Heavy sick. It was 308 00:28:42,360 --> 00:28:47,360 Speaker 1: horrible when she cried. Is it? Is it feeling like 309 00:28:47,560 --> 00:28:53,040 Speaker 1: the your mom's reaction is different than than what you 310 00:28:53,120 --> 00:28:57,160 Speaker 1: had thought it would be. Hearing her cry like that 311 00:28:57,360 --> 00:29:02,360 Speaker 1: in the back seat, like that's raw. Ship, m I 312 00:29:02,400 --> 00:29:04,440 Speaker 1: don't know how to do the right thing for her. 313 00:29:05,360 --> 00:29:07,360 Speaker 1: I thought that taking her to Hart Island was it. 314 00:29:09,120 --> 00:29:13,160 Speaker 1: Ship and movies is so neat, you know, go to 315 00:29:13,240 --> 00:29:15,640 Speaker 1: the grave and you lay the flowers and it fades 316 00:29:15,720 --> 00:29:21,560 Speaker 1: to black, and everybody just feels satisfied and reconciled. But 317 00:29:21,720 --> 00:29:26,160 Speaker 1: real life isn't like that. Even if you can find 318 00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:31,840 Speaker 1: the grave, it might not scratch the itch of reconciling 319 00:29:31,920 --> 00:29:41,640 Speaker 1: that somebody was killed. When I started this whole thing, 320 00:29:42,200 --> 00:29:44,760 Speaker 1: I thought that this day taking my mom to say 321 00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:47,680 Speaker 1: goodbye to Billy would be the end of the story. 322 00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:53,320 Speaker 1: But it's clearly not. My mom still feels like there 323 00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:57,120 Speaker 1: was an injustice against Billy, that he was wrongfully killed. 324 00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:07,240 Speaker 1: When I was younger, I started making a list, a 325 00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:09,760 Speaker 1: list of questions I would ask the cop who shot 326 00:30:09,880 --> 00:30:13,680 Speaker 1: Billy if I could ever find him. I thought there 327 00:30:13,720 --> 00:30:19,160 Speaker 1: was no way I would ever get the chance. I 328 00:30:19,360 --> 00:30:23,920 Speaker 1: was wrong. Austin talked to me for a sec. Yes, Hello, Okay, 329 00:30:24,120 --> 00:30:28,680 Speaker 1: that's good. That's good. Okay, I'm gonna call Mr Holy 330 00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:53,200 Speaker 1: sh It next week. The undercover Cop Crimetown is Zack 331 00:30:53,240 --> 00:30:57,560 Speaker 1: Stewart Pontier and Mark Smirling. The Ballad of Billy Balls 332 00:30:57,720 --> 00:31:00,320 Speaker 1: is hosted by me I Oh Till It Right and 333 00:31:00,440 --> 00:31:03,640 Speaker 1: made in partnership with Kaden's thirteen. You can find me 334 00:31:03,760 --> 00:31:06,840 Speaker 1: on the Internet. Umio loves you on everything. Say Hello, 335 00:31:07,680 --> 00:31:09,280 Speaker 1: and if you want to know more about my story, 336 00:31:09,520 --> 00:31:14,960 Speaker 1: you can pick up my memoir Darling Days. We also 337 00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:17,360 Speaker 1: want to hear from you. We have a voicemail set 338 00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:20,480 Speaker 1: up for you to call us. Here's Candice. I have 339 00:31:20,640 --> 00:31:23,080 Speaker 1: this family story that I've always wanted to look into, 340 00:31:23,600 --> 00:31:27,120 Speaker 1: and it involved a sister I don't know, and my 341 00:31:27,240 --> 00:31:30,120 Speaker 1: mom was supposed to give up her child. But I'm 342 00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:33,000 Speaker 1: terrified to ask my mom more questions because of the 343 00:31:33,040 --> 00:31:36,440 Speaker 1: emotional impact it might have on her. And I just 344 00:31:36,600 --> 00:31:39,960 Speaker 1: want to know any advice you might have for breaking 345 00:31:40,040 --> 00:31:43,040 Speaker 1: the ice. It's sort of always doing the thing I've 346 00:31:43,080 --> 00:31:45,680 Speaker 1: really really wanted to look into, and I think a 347 00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:49,440 Speaker 1: lot of people have a similar story. Thanks for that, Candice. 348 00:31:50,080 --> 00:31:52,640 Speaker 1: You know my best advice is to just take it 349 00:31:52,760 --> 00:31:55,080 Speaker 1: really slow and approach it with a lot of compassion 350 00:31:55,280 --> 00:31:58,719 Speaker 1: and tenderness. And anybody else, if you have a family 351 00:31:58,800 --> 00:32:02,080 Speaker 1: mystery solved or unsolved, we'd love to hear about it. 352 00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:04,960 Speaker 1: Call us and leave us a voicemail at five seven 353 00:32:05,040 --> 00:32:09,719 Speaker 1: oh three nine to nine zero, seriously, call right now. 354 00:32:10,280 --> 00:32:12,720 Speaker 1: You can also get into our discussion forum on our website, 355 00:32:12,840 --> 00:32:19,240 Speaker 1: The Ballad of Billie Balls dot com, and that the 356 00:32:19,280 --> 00:32:22,720 Speaker 1: show is produced by me, Kevin Sheppard, and Ryan Swigert. 357 00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:27,240 Speaker 1: Our senior producer is Austin Mitchell. Editing by Zack Stewart 358 00:32:27,320 --> 00:32:32,160 Speaker 1: Contier and Mark Smirling. Fact checking by Jennifer Blackman. This 359 00:32:32,320 --> 00:32:36,160 Speaker 1: episode was mixed by Kenny Qcack. Music and sound designed 360 00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:39,800 Speaker 1: by Kenny qcac two. Our title track is Dark Allies 361 00:32:39,920 --> 00:32:44,800 Speaker 1: by Light Asylum. Archival research by Brennan Reese. Thanks to 362 00:32:44,920 --> 00:32:49,960 Speaker 1: Daniella Aria, my Fiance Rachel, Emily Wiederman, Green Card Pictures, 363 00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:55,360 Speaker 1: Alessandro Sentauro, Bill Clegg, Ben Davis, Orn Rosenbaum, and the 364 00:32:55,480 --> 00:32:59,640 Speaker 1: team at Cadence thirteen, and special thanks to Mrs Calvert 365 00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:02,440 Speaker 1: at the e o C for honoring love and of 366 00:33:02,560 --> 00:33:06,680 Speaker 1: course my mom, without whom none of this would be possible. 367 00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:07,560 Speaker 1: M