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Speaker 1: Find your people and let them inspire you and encourage

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Speaker 1: you and remind you that you are not going to collapse.

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Speaker 1: You know, at the presence of any one challenge coming up,

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Speaker 1: you're so much bigger than that.

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Speaker 2: Hey, Hurdlers, Emily Vadi. Here you are listening to episode

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Speaker 2: two hundred and forty seven of Hurdle, a wellness focused

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Speaker 2: podcast where I talk to inspirational people about everything from

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Speaker 2: their highest ties and toughest moments to essential tips on

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Speaker 2: how to live a healthier, happier, more motivated life. We

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Speaker 2: all go through our fair share of hurdles. My goal

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Speaker 2: through these discussions is to empower you to better navigate

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Speaker 2: yours and move with intention so that you can towards

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Speaker 2: your own big potential and of course have some fun

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Speaker 2: along the way. For today's episode to forty seven, I

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Speaker 2: am chatting with author and self care advocate Brianna Weis.

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Speaker 2: She's got a new book out. It is called The

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Speaker 2: Life That's Waiting. And to tell you that I was

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Speaker 2: anxiously anticipating, I won't even say waiting, for anticipating this

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Speaker 2: conversation would be the biggest understatement I this year. Every

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Speaker 2: morning and reading a page from Brianna's book, The Pivot Year,

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Speaker 2: which is a book that features three hundred and sixty

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Speaker 2: five daily meditations, and I'll use her words on finding

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Speaker 2: the courage to become who you've always wanted to be

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Speaker 2: end quote. I have, gosh just so appreciated Brianna's words

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Speaker 2: and wisdom as I have come into my own, and

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Speaker 2: I am really feeling so inspired by her words this year,

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Speaker 2: and so I was honored that she took the time

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Speaker 2: to sit down with me for Hurdle to share some

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Speaker 2: of her goodness with all of you. Brianna talks about

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Speaker 2: her upbringing and the journey that has gotten her to

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Speaker 2: this point of being in a place where she feels

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Speaker 2: confident enough to share her words and her writing with

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Speaker 2: the world. We talk about the importance of the inputs

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Speaker 2: in our life and how it is so so important

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Speaker 2: to make sure that you are only taking criticism from

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Speaker 2: those that you would seek advice from.

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Speaker 3: Super important there.

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Speaker 2: We also talk about the hurdles that Brianna has faced

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Speaker 2: within writing, of what it was like for her to

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Speaker 2: expose herself to so many people from the get go,

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Speaker 2: and how she feels that it is so important that

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Speaker 2: regardless of what arena, and I use that word very specifically,

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Speaker 2: that you are in you open yourself to learning from

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Speaker 2: individuals in others, regardless of what arena that may be. Again,

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Speaker 2: this was such an impactful, I say that, very purposefully

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Speaker 2: impactful conversation for me, and I so appreciate being able

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Speaker 2: to sit down with Brianna in the midst of launching

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Speaker 2: this new book.

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Speaker 3: Again.

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Speaker 2: The new book is called The Life That's Waiting. The

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Speaker 2: book that I'm reading right now is called The Pivot Year.

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Speaker 2: Other amazing texts that she has written, one hundred and

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Speaker 2: one essays that will change the way that you think

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Speaker 2: the mountain is you.

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Speaker 3: We talk about all of them today.

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Speaker 2: Make sure you're following along with Hurdle over on social

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Speaker 2: It's at Hurdle podcast and me over at Emily a

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Speaker 2: Body And if you're not yet subscribed to our substack

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Speaker 2: over at the Weekly Hurdle. The link to do that

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Speaker 2: is in the show notes. With that, let's get to it.

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Speaker 2: Let's get to hurdling. Today, I have the privilege of

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Speaker 2: sitting down with Brianna Weist. She is a best selling

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Speaker 2: author of so many books. I'm sure you're familiar with

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Speaker 2: one hundred and one essays that will change the way

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Speaker 2: you think. The Pivot Year, the Mountain is you and

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Speaker 2: the newest added to the collection, the Life That's Waiting,

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Speaker 2: which is out now.

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Speaker 3: Welcome to hurdle, Brianna. How are you so good?

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Speaker 1: Thank you for having me.

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Speaker 3: I am so excited to have you here.

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Speaker 2: I for context, am reading the Pivot Year right now,

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Speaker 2: and the subtitle on that one is three hundred and

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Speaker 2: sixty five days to become the person you truly want

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Speaker 2: to be. Would you say that you are in the

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Speaker 2: act of becoming that person? Oh?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's been like going on from mo more than

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Speaker 1: three hundred and sixty five days, So it's been us.

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Speaker 1: This has been like a decade and a half long,

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Speaker 1: probably honestly journey. If I could call it that, I

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Speaker 1: think where I think that word gets overused, but that's

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Speaker 1: really what I want to call it. I feel like

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Speaker 1: I am always trying to inch toward what is true

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Speaker 1: to me, always trying to create from a place of

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Speaker 1: what And I believe that across the board we are

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Speaker 1: our own first slip miess test, especially when we're creating something,

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Speaker 1: so it has to be real for us first in

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Speaker 1: some way, because it's like if we consider the audience,

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Speaker 1: the reader, you know, whoever is you know, in front

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Speaker 1: of us, before we consider ourselves. It tends to have

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Speaker 1: an emptiness to it, do you know what I mean?

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Speaker 1: It hasn't been imbued with something real. And I've felt

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Speaker 1: and experienced you know, writing music, you know, whatever it

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Speaker 1: is when I can tell that that artist, you know,

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Speaker 1: there was something real for them in that moment, like

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Speaker 1: there there was a piece of them in it, and

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Speaker 1: how much I'm impacted by that and how much it's

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Speaker 1: changed me and inspired me and influenced me, and it's

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Speaker 1: like my dream to hopefully be that for other people.

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Speaker 2: When did writing first feel very real for you?

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Speaker 1: Oh? Yeah, So I started doing it in my late

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Speaker 1: teens teens, and then I was actually a writing major

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Speaker 1: in college. And this is a really great true story

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Speaker 1: that I was. So my major was technically called professional writing.

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Speaker 1: So we kind of did like, you know, like some

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Speaker 1: ja school stuff, like like some marketing set, you know,

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Speaker 1: kind of like ways in which writing would you know,

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Speaker 1: exist in the workplace kind of stuff. And there were

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Speaker 1: options to do creative writing classes and I refused to

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Speaker 1: take them because I was literally too embarrassed to have

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Speaker 1: to like get up in front of the class and

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Speaker 1: like read my work periodically throughout the semester, which I

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Speaker 1: use which had to do, and I truly felt like

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Speaker 1: I had nothing good to say I and everything I

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Speaker 1: wrote was terrible and I just couldn't do it. I

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Speaker 1: was like, no, I like I have nothing to share,

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Speaker 1: Like I'm just like too mortified. I absolutely cannot, Like

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Speaker 1: this is terrible, and so like the irony of like

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Speaker 1: what I like do now every day of my life

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Speaker 1: is like not lost on me truly. So I think

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Speaker 1: that like professionally speaking, after college and like I wanted

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Speaker 1: to go into editing or writing. It felt real to

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Speaker 1: me then, like as like a profession, like I didn't.

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Speaker 1: I think that some people have really kind of a

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Speaker 1: journey they go on to feel comfortable calling themselves an

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Speaker 1: artist or writer. Those are words that not everyone feels

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Speaker 1: that they can just like. But I didn't really have

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Speaker 1: that problem because I really was like working as that

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Speaker 1: so it just felt natural, like to be writer. But then,

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Speaker 1: you know, simultaneously, I was kind of you know going

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Speaker 1: on my own you know, personal growth, self reflective, you know,

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Speaker 1: process of you know becoming as so many of us

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Speaker 1: are at that age. But then you know, forever more

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Speaker 1: and I start, you know, sharing a lot of that writing,

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Speaker 1: and that's when things got real, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 1: Like at the beginning, it was like a few people

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Speaker 1: read it were like, oh nice, you know what I mean?

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Speaker 1: That was kind of it.

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Speaker 3: Then I can start up pick up.

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Speaker 1: And you like, you don't go in with a contingentcy listen,

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Speaker 1: Okay if you go into writing anything like, you're not

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Speaker 1: going in being like, oh like definitely a million people

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Speaker 1: are going to read this Like that's not anywhere you're

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Speaker 1: like going and thinking, I hope one person, but you

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Speaker 1: know what I mean, like, there's not like you're like that,

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Speaker 1: I'll take it, you know what I mean? Like if

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Speaker 1: if one or two people like this, if I helped

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Speaker 1: one person, okay, great, you have no contingency plan for

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Speaker 1: this many people like reading kind of your innermost thoughts.

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Speaker 1: I can't I really can't think about it too hard.

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Speaker 2: There's a lot to unpack here. The first thing though,

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Speaker 2: is I love what you said. I felt like I

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Speaker 2: had nothing good to say, regardless of interest, field, profession,

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Speaker 2: et cetera. That feeling of I'm not good enough, I

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Speaker 2: don't have this level of worth. I don't have something

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Speaker 2: new to say, no fresh perspective. Those assumptions are what

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Speaker 2: ultimately hold them back.

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Speaker 3: So for you, you began to dabble.

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Speaker 2: On your own and developed a certain level of confidence

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Speaker 2: that empowered you to say, Okay, well maybe I'm willing

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Speaker 2: to try it.

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Speaker 3: Would you agree?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? I mean that was so well summarized. And also,

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Speaker 1: I think the other thing that held me back that

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Speaker 1: I think a lot of people struggle with is I'm

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Speaker 1: not special, doe know. I mean like I'm not that interesting,

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Speaker 1: Like I'm not that smart. I'm not but you know,

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Speaker 1: I don't know, like I was just not like I

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Speaker 1: didn't really have that And I don't even mean it

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Speaker 1: in a bad way. It was just at the time,

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Speaker 1: I was just like, I don't know, Like to me,

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Speaker 1: people who do creative things like that are like, I

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Speaker 1: don't know, like intriguing people, just like I don't.

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Speaker 2: Know, everyone that we look for these days that is

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Speaker 2: some sort of person of intrigue started off as someone

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Speaker 2: that felt that way, right, And so it's just getting

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Speaker 2: to a point where you have enough self belief that

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Speaker 2: you can say why not me?

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Speaker 3: Right?

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Speaker 1: Well, I you know, something that really helped me get

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Speaker 1: over it is I thought about my heroes, my idols,

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Speaker 1: you know, like the people that I looked at were like, oh,

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Speaker 1: like if I could do one fiftieth of what you've done,

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Speaker 1: I mean, like I would die happy, like I thought of.

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Speaker 1: You know, Cheryl Strait is one of my favorite authors,

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Speaker 1: and you know where she describes herself like self descriptive

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Speaker 1: of like where she was at in her life when

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Speaker 1: she started writing, like it was not good, you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean. And this is not me even making

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Speaker 1: an assessment, but she writes about the books, you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean. When she started writing, she was like, look,

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Speaker 1: I really felt like I had to do it. But

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Speaker 1: also my life was in pieces. I was. You know,

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Speaker 1: she talks about her drug you just talks about being

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Speaker 1: you know, financially unstable, you know, losing her mind and

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Speaker 1: all of these things that were going on. There was

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Speaker 1: nothing happening in her life that would kind of like

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Speaker 1: qualify her to become this extraordinary artist that she is today.

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Speaker 1: The only difference is that she did it. That's it.

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Speaker 1: She showed up and she did it. She did the

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Speaker 1: damn thing. That's it. That's seriously, that is what. And

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Speaker 1: so today I think of her as this extraordinary literary

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Speaker 1: hero of mine. But if I had met her back then,

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Speaker 1: I'd been like, well, it's my friend Cheryl, for we're friends,

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Speaker 1: but like, you know what I mean, it's my friend Cheryl,

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Speaker 1: Like she's struggling, like do you know what I'm saying? Yeah, Also,

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Speaker 1: Cheryl straight, if you happen to listen, I will feel

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Speaker 1: like I'm at the mountaintop one. I love you to

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Speaker 1: call me.

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Speaker 3: Rihanna wants to chat with her literary idol.

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Speaker 1: I love you. But I really think that there's something

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Speaker 1: so freeing about coming into that place though. Of if

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Speaker 1: you think of the people you most look up to,

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Speaker 1: you start to kind of realize, oh, like they just

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Speaker 1: did they did it. They just showed up and they

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Speaker 1: did it, and they kept doing it. And in spite

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Speaker 1: of those doubts, in spite of I think, in many

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Speaker 1: cases a lack of maybe self confidence or self belief.

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Speaker 1: I don't I think those things are built. I don't

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Speaker 1: know that we start with them, and so at the

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Speaker 1: beginning we're looking for them, like, Okay, when I feel confident,

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Speaker 1: I'll start It's like no, but that confidence is going

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Speaker 1: to build as you keep moving. So what you were

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Speaker 1: saying too about you know, I start, I'm just like,

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Speaker 1: I have literally nothing good to say. When I really

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Speaker 1: started writing, I wasn't trying to say anything to anyone else,

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Speaker 1: and that was why I was able to walk through

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Speaker 1: the doorway. And I really mean it. It's like I

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Speaker 1: was genuinely this was something I was doing for me.

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Speaker 1: I loved this, do you know what I mean? Like

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Speaker 1: for better or for worse, Whether one person read it

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Speaker 1: or a million, I didn't care, Like it was not

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Speaker 1: even I wasn't even thinking that way. It made my

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Speaker 1: life better, It made me better, but it was also

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Speaker 1: something I loved, and I think that that is the strongest,

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Speaker 1: most on fire place you can get with anything, which

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Speaker 1: is like, look, there is no failure here because I

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Speaker 1: devoted part of my life to the thing I most

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Speaker 1: loved that made my life full and whole and beautiful.

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Speaker 1: There's nothing else that has to happen beyond that, and

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Speaker 1: anything else is graaty, you know what I mean. Like,

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Speaker 1: but but if the act of doing it can be

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Speaker 1: so alive and real to you that that's it, that

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Speaker 1: also tends to be the place when it does actually work.

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Speaker 2: I mean, it's conversation of that joy is a win

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Speaker 2: within itself. Right, So often we gauge our perception of

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Speaker 2: doing well or doing good to be on what other

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Speaker 2: people have done, rather than asking ourselves, does the act

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Speaker 2: of doing this thing bring me joy, bring me purpose,

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Speaker 2: bring me to a place where I feel fulfilled?

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Speaker 3: And it's hard to get there?

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Speaker 2: There are other needs, right, Like, you might not feel

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Speaker 2: like you failed when you began writing, but I'm sure

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Speaker 2: it wasn't lucrative for you at first.

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Speaker 1: Oh no, you're like your aspirations are low, you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean, at that time, You're you're not going

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Speaker 1: into a thinking, oh, this is it, this is my

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Speaker 1: ticket to the pig LEI like, you're just no, you'd

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Speaker 1: pick pretty much anything else under the sun, you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean, other than this if you wanted. So

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Speaker 1: it's a lot of you loving it that fuels you

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Speaker 1: do you know what? Like And it kind of has

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Speaker 1: to because it really isn't an.

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Speaker 3: Yeah for a long time.

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Speaker 2: But this is a really good compare it like a

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Speaker 2: note on comparison then, right, because so many individuals might

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Speaker 2: see someone like you today and think that is what

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Speaker 2: I want. But also they're just seeing the highlights of it.

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Speaker 2: They don't think about Okay, like, I think that this

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Speaker 2: is what I want, so I'm just going to start

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Speaker 2: doing this.

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Speaker 3: But the joy is in the process.

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Speaker 2: And if you're not having the joy in the process,

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Speaker 2: it doesn't matter how glitzy and glamorous and exciting this

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Speaker 2: mountaintop looks like. You won't get to that place if

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Speaker 2: you're not enjoying the journey on the way there.

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Speaker 1: Every essay in my first well the book that got

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Speaker 1: popular for one hundred and essays, it changed my life

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Speaker 1: to write it, do you know what I mean? And

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Speaker 1: then when I had it was first posted online, I

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Speaker 1: don't know, like a few people read it, like it

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Speaker 1: was not like a thing like at all, and I

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Speaker 1: didn't care, do you know what I mean? Like I

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Speaker 1: just didn't even the fact that anyone read it was

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Speaker 1: like wow, and also kind of like made me self conscious.

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Speaker 1: But you know, every part of that was such a deep,

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Speaker 1: meaningful experience to me. And then you know, on top

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Speaker 1: of that, it took seven years for that book to

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Speaker 1: you know, even get I think it was seven or

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Speaker 1: eight years. And then all at once, I think that

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Speaker 1: in the Mountains you was like number one and number

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Speaker 1: two in like seven countries, a much something, and then

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Speaker 1: all the translations start, and then it was kind of like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: we're in the arena now, but it was years years

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Speaker 1: of like not just being consistent, but like a trial

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Speaker 1: and error. So like there's like two different skill sets.

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Speaker 1: There's the skill set of writing or creating the thing,

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Speaker 1: and then there's the skill set of getting it to

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Speaker 1: the people who want to read it. And it's two

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Speaker 1: different things, and it's two different parts of your brain

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Speaker 1: you have to kind of build simultaneously, do you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean? And also in harmony with one another,

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Speaker 1: because I think it gets hard to feel proud or

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Speaker 1: in integrity if they're not in harmony. And I think

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Speaker 1: that there are so many ways, especially today, you know,

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Speaker 1: to meet your needs in both arenas, but also to

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Speaker 1: understand it is a process. It is a seriously, it

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Speaker 1: is a huge process of trial and error. But I oh,

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Speaker 1: my gosh, who said Cody Sanchez? I think she had

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Speaker 1: a video where she was saying, you know her the

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Speaker 1: with one mentor that she really looks up to and

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Speaker 1: has helped her so much. She said, you know, what's

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Speaker 1: the one thing you could say to me? And he

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Speaker 1: was talking about speed. He was like, because I moved

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Speaker 1: quickly before anyone else has even gotten a chance. He's like,

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Speaker 1: I've done it twice, failed once, and I'm already trying

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Speaker 1: to develop a better way. And that resonated with me

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Speaker 1: because that speed and that decisiveness is something I feel

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Speaker 1: I have or I try to have and no, but

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Speaker 1: I think it comes kind of naturally though, like I

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Speaker 1: just kind of do it, but like, and it's really

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Speaker 1: been productive for me. And it also has to come

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Speaker 1: though with a fearlessness of like I'm going to look

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Speaker 1: like there's no world in which I'm leaving this earth

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Speaker 1: not doing this damn thing. Okay, one way or another,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to keep trying, like and if I fail,

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Speaker 1: there's a way of even appreciating all the one hundred

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Speaker 1: failures along the way. You know, I think I've heard

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Speaker 1: this before too. It's like if you knew you were

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Speaker 1: twenty no's away from the as, how excited would you

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Speaker 1: be toing it every now? You'd be like, Okay, one

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Speaker 1: more down, one more down, keep going because if you

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Speaker 1: do keep going, like it is inevitable, you will get there.

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Speaker 1: But you have to adapt, you have to learn, you

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Speaker 1: have to grow with it, you have to kind of

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Speaker 1: nurture it. And stay with it and commit to it if.

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Speaker 2: You knew you were twenty nos away from Yes, What

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Speaker 2: a perspective shift, right. I appreciate what you shared about

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Speaker 2: being afraid at the beginning revealing so much of yourself

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Speaker 2: through your writing. How did you get over that hurdle

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Speaker 2: in the pursuit of writing even more and sharing in

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Speaker 2: a bigger way?

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Speaker 1: You know, people ask me this and I don't have

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Speaker 1: a good answer for it because I don't really know,

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Speaker 1: and I've thought about it a lot. It just stopped

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Speaker 1: bothering me one day. I think it was just doing

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Speaker 1: it over and over again, and then eventually I was

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Speaker 1: kind of like, all right, I can do this. But no,

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Speaker 1: it was like a huge fear at the beginning. But

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Speaker 1: I think it's also been gradual in some ways where

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Speaker 1: I think that because I know that what I created

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Speaker 1: and was creating and and creating is in truth, I

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Speaker 1: find this deep piece in that It's like whether you

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Speaker 1: like it or whether you don't, whether you read it,

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Speaker 1: whether you don't, whether you think it's great, whether you

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Speaker 1: think it sucks. The thing that I feel I can

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Speaker 1: really rest in is but it was real for me,

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Like that was true for me,

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Speaker 1: that was the best that I could do at that moment.

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Speaker 2: More often than not, if someone is criticizing someone's beginning,

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Speaker 2: then there is something that they're doing at The person

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Speaker 2: that is making those judgments is either envious of or

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Speaker 2: jealous over, or whatever the case may be. That person's

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Speaker 2: still on the bench and you're in the middle of

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Speaker 2: the field, right.

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Speaker 1: Yes, one hundred percent. We have to be mindful of

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Speaker 1: not taking criticism of people. We wouldn't take advice from,

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Speaker 1: advice from excuse me, and not taking advice from people

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Speaker 1: we wouldn't want to switch places with advice from people

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Speaker 1: who who, as you just said, they're on the bench.

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Speaker 1: You try it. I think I think I said this once,

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Speaker 1: like a really unhinged like this is years ago. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I can't care anymore, but like I remember someone like

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Speaker 1: ness like your book was done, book was done or something,

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Speaker 1: And I seriously think I said, like, when you write

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Speaker 1: a book, and I'll read yours and I'll let you

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Speaker 1: know what I think, Like, do you know what I mean?

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Speaker 1: You try it.

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Speaker 2: I can guarant to you that when that person messaged you,

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Speaker 2: it wasn't about the book at all.

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Speaker 1: It never is It seriously never is. And I think

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Speaker 1: that when you're dealing with people who are also in

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Speaker 1: the arena or in a arena of their own lives,

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Speaker 1: it doesn't have to even be the same thing, but

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Speaker 1: like they get it. It's like you can either meet

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Speaker 1: each other eye to eye or like I feel like

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Speaker 1: ten times out of ten, there's an incredible amount of support,

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Speaker 1: like wisdom, shared advice given, like I have felt nothing

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Speaker 1: but genuinely like encouraged and supported if you're even just trying,

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Speaker 1: Like you can recognize someone else who's trying, and then

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Speaker 1: you hold that like space for them of like hell, yeah,

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Speaker 1: get after it.

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Speaker 3: Yet after it now so many books.

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Speaker 2: In reflecting on that first book, do you remember the

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Speaker 2: yes that you got that turned that book into a reality.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, But I'm with an independent publisher and so it

396
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Speaker 1: was like a very like small production and like that,

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Speaker 1: and my first three were more experimental than anything. Honestly,

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Speaker 1: it was thrilling to be able to do it, but

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Speaker 1: it kind of went in with the understanding that, you know,

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Speaker 1: I had to just kind of be grounded and realistic

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Speaker 1: of what would come of it. And I think that

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Speaker 1: sometimes we go in thinking like Okay, like I tried

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Speaker 1: this once or I had this mustered up this much

404
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Speaker 1: courage to do this, like this has to be the

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Speaker 1: thing that's successful, this has to be the thing that

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Speaker 1: does it that changes my life. But for me, it

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Speaker 1: was the process of writing more and more books that

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Speaker 1: I figured out like how to even do it.

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Speaker 2: But I'm sure that when you went into writing those

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Speaker 2: first handful of books that you had a preconceived notion

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Speaker 2: that it should be a different way than you were

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Speaker 2: going about it now.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely, Being like in the industry and on the back

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Speaker 1: end for as many years as I have been, you

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Speaker 1: have such a different perspective on life, like everything, do

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Like you're like, oh, okay,

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Speaker 1: that's why that works this way, or like that's why

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Speaker 1: this happens this way, or and it's all these technical

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Speaker 1: things too. It's like, well that's why this is stopped here,

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Speaker 1: that's why we're having an issue here, or this is

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Speaker 1: why we like have to be on Amazon. Before you're

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Speaker 1: in it, it's you don't really get it, and you're

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Speaker 1: really a grant. I understand, we're going to do the

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Speaker 1: best we can.

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Speaker 3: What's the biggest learning curve been for you?

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Speaker 1: The thing that I've learned the most is how to

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Speaker 1: know what other people will resonate with, which is a

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Speaker 1: skill more than I think. It's like an ability you

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Speaker 1: don't do or don't have, and I think that it

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Speaker 1: applies to pretty much literally like any industry, any profession,

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Speaker 1: any kind of business, like anything you're trying to do

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Speaker 1: in life that appeals or in some way has to

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Speaker 1: interact with other people. Being able to understand that, I

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Speaker 1: think is like foundational, like fundamental, And I feel like

435
00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:07,600
Speaker 1: all of these years have been this huge learning curve.

436
00:24:07,920 --> 00:24:11,320
Speaker 1: I notice if I do a post, they like some

437
00:24:11,520 --> 00:24:14,359
Speaker 1: fonts over others. They're like, it's the same words, but

438
00:24:14,480 --> 00:24:17,240
Speaker 1: like if I really look into it, it's like the

439
00:24:17,359 --> 00:24:20,320
Speaker 1: Sarah line on this spont no matter how tiny these

440
00:24:20,359 --> 00:24:23,800
Speaker 1: words even are, is easier for the eye to read,

441
00:24:24,160 --> 00:24:27,000
Speaker 1: and so like they will sit with it more than

442
00:24:27,040 --> 00:24:28,639
Speaker 1: they wouldn't other I mean, it's like, seriously, it's like

443
00:24:28,680 --> 00:24:31,320
Speaker 1: little things like that that you maybe wouldn't even think of.

444
00:24:31,960 --> 00:24:36,040
Speaker 1: And so I always felt like it was important and

445
00:24:36,240 --> 00:24:39,640
Speaker 1: is important for things to come from a place of oh,

446
00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:42,880
Speaker 1: this feels empowering, and I want that, like I want

447
00:24:42,880 --> 00:24:45,600
Speaker 1: that really badly. Actually, for my readers, which is like

448
00:24:45,680 --> 00:24:48,879
Speaker 1: I want I want them to feel empowered and stronger

449
00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:52,920
Speaker 1: and like proud of themselves and like inspired.

450
00:24:53,160 --> 00:24:55,960
Speaker 3: What makes you feel empowered, Rihanna.

451
00:24:55,920 --> 00:24:58,480
Speaker 1: Having a vision for something, kind of having a dream

452
00:24:58,560 --> 00:25:02,639
Speaker 1: for it and then seeing it through. And it's seeing

453
00:25:02,640 --> 00:25:05,199
Speaker 1: it through not even the creative process, but seeing it

454
00:25:05,240 --> 00:25:07,760
Speaker 1: through the hurdles, seeing it through the challenges, seeing it

455
00:25:07,800 --> 00:25:11,359
Speaker 1: through the failures, and not giving up and being willing

456
00:25:11,600 --> 00:25:15,480
Speaker 1: to adapt, to change, to meet it, to grow, but

457
00:25:15,640 --> 00:25:18,600
Speaker 1: not to give up being with something from the point

458
00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:21,160
Speaker 1: where it gets just an idea in your head into

459
00:25:21,240 --> 00:25:23,440
Speaker 1: like it's this tangible thing in the world now other

460
00:25:23,440 --> 00:25:26,040
Speaker 1: people are experiencing. It's like almost trippy, but it's so

461
00:25:26,280 --> 00:25:29,480
Speaker 1: cool and it is so empowering because you realize just

462
00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:31,520
Speaker 1: how much power you have.

463
00:25:32,280 --> 00:25:36,720
Speaker 2: I want to kind of exemplify this using your journey

464
00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:40,560
Speaker 2: here because someone here is it's so powerful to have

465
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:41,600
Speaker 2: an idea and see it through.

466
00:25:41,640 --> 00:25:43,239
Speaker 3: And I'm so proud of myself that I didn't get

467
00:25:43,280 --> 00:25:43,760
Speaker 3: off the path.

468
00:25:43,840 --> 00:25:47,040
Speaker 2: But that doesn't mean that there aren't, as you said,

469
00:25:47,359 --> 00:25:49,280
Speaker 2: so many hurdles and obstacles in your.

470
00:25:49,160 --> 00:25:50,760
Speaker 3: Way going down that path.

471
00:25:51,400 --> 00:25:55,320
Speaker 2: What would you say were the biggest obstacles for you

472
00:25:55,680 --> 00:26:00,399
Speaker 2: when you began sharing your writing in this world in

473
00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:04,080
Speaker 2: this book format, pivoting from where you started with your writing.

474
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:06,800
Speaker 1: First one that comes to mind is financial. I think, yeah,

475
00:26:07,119 --> 00:26:10,679
Speaker 1: because I remember the moment when I seriously knew and

476
00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:13,600
Speaker 1: I can't even explain it beyond this. I literally remember

477
00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:16,920
Speaker 1: the moment where I was like I meant to stop

478
00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:19,399
Speaker 1: doing all this other work, and like I meant to

479
00:26:19,440 --> 00:26:23,359
Speaker 1: just pour myself into these books, and like this is

480
00:26:23,400 --> 00:26:26,840
Speaker 1: not a supervible pan at the time, Like I did

481
00:26:26,840 --> 00:26:29,520
Speaker 1: figure it out, but at the time it was there's

482
00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:33,800
Speaker 1: a lot of self tru of no, I will figure

483
00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:38,080
Speaker 1: this out. But then the others I think came through

484
00:26:39,280 --> 00:26:42,520
Speaker 1: lacking a sense of self and self confidence of like

485
00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:44,360
Speaker 1: I'm going to put myself out there in this way,

486
00:26:44,440 --> 00:26:46,359
Speaker 1: Like who do I think I am? An author? Do

487
00:26:46,400 --> 00:26:48,040
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Like when I write books,

488
00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:52,680
Speaker 1: Like there's the sense of you're kind of positioning yourself

489
00:26:52,920 --> 00:26:58,040
Speaker 1: when you're just starting out on anything. You are positioning

490
00:26:58,080 --> 00:27:03,000
Speaker 1: yourself as a public figure for you are one. Does

491
00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:04,000
Speaker 1: that make sense?

492
00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:08,119
Speaker 2: You're positioning yourself as who you want to be while

493
00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:09,160
Speaker 2: you are becoming it.

494
00:27:09,600 --> 00:27:11,959
Speaker 1: Yes, because that's the only way you get there. I

495
00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:14,440
Speaker 1: have to act as an author would act, and write

496
00:27:14,480 --> 00:27:16,960
Speaker 1: as an author would write, and create as because other

497
00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:19,480
Speaker 1: that's the only path to it. But it's at those

498
00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:22,320
Speaker 1: beginning phases when I'm going from not that to that,

499
00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:25,840
Speaker 1: I think I think I at least experienced a lot

500
00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:28,000
Speaker 1: of kind of anxiety of people being like are you,

501
00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:30,040
Speaker 1: Like are you out of your mind? Like what do

502
00:27:30,119 --> 00:27:31,640
Speaker 1: you You're not doing?

503
00:27:32,040 --> 00:27:35,280
Speaker 2: It's highly understandable, though it makes me think about the

504
00:27:35,400 --> 00:27:37,720
Speaker 2: saying if you have a body, you're an athlete, But

505
00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:41,320
Speaker 2: that doesn't mean that everyone who goes for a run

506
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:43,800
Speaker 2: or goes to the gym identifies in that way.

507
00:27:43,840 --> 00:27:45,480
Speaker 3: But still it is true.

508
00:27:45,560 --> 00:27:49,200
Speaker 2: Right, just because you might, for instance, run a mile

509
00:27:49,520 --> 00:27:52,240
Speaker 2: and it takes you eighteen minutes, doesn't mean that you're

510
00:27:52,320 --> 00:27:55,560
Speaker 2: running any less far than someone who does it in

511
00:27:55,640 --> 00:27:57,359
Speaker 2: a ten minutes faster amount of time.

512
00:27:57,640 --> 00:27:59,480
Speaker 1: That's right. Yeah, And it kind of goes back to

513
00:27:59,480 --> 00:28:03,200
Speaker 1: what we were saying too about you know, the people we

514
00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:06,440
Speaker 1: idolize who we think are our heroes in so many ways,

515
00:28:06,440 --> 00:28:09,200
Speaker 1: and it's like, well, who were they before they were

516
00:28:09,359 --> 00:28:11,639
Speaker 1: that person? It's like, you know, they were a human

517
00:28:11,680 --> 00:28:14,760
Speaker 1: being having their life and experiences. But it's like you

518
00:28:14,840 --> 00:28:18,600
Speaker 1: get there by doing, but sometimes it can feel, I

519
00:28:18,640 --> 00:28:21,840
Speaker 1: think hard to commit to the doing when your self

520
00:28:22,520 --> 00:28:25,640
Speaker 1: concept and your idea of yourself is not that yet,

521
00:28:25,680 --> 00:28:28,720
Speaker 1: so it's like you have to shift it alongside.

522
00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:32,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, I totally understand what you mean. You said

523
00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:35,479
Speaker 2: that you ultimately figured it out. When we're talking about

524
00:28:35,920 --> 00:28:38,760
Speaker 2: shifting into books. I would love for you to give

525
00:28:38,840 --> 00:28:42,080
Speaker 2: us some color on what that process looked like, because

526
00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:46,880
Speaker 2: I think that that is such a really beautiful testament

527
00:28:47,080 --> 00:28:51,800
Speaker 2: to where your passions laid, where.

528
00:28:51,560 --> 00:28:53,000
Speaker 3: Your why was.

529
00:28:53,080 --> 00:28:55,160
Speaker 2: You had such a strong why that you were willing

530
00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:57,520
Speaker 2: to do things that you had never done to get

531
00:28:57,520 --> 00:28:59,000
Speaker 2: to somewhere that you had never been.

532
00:28:59,280 --> 00:29:03,960
Speaker 1: I really anything but words from those books for years, literally,

533
00:29:04,560 --> 00:29:10,880
Speaker 1: and I I mean like I went hard. And I

534
00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:13,160
Speaker 1: remember at one point I like posted a close friends

535
00:29:13,160 --> 00:29:15,360
Speaker 1: story and I was like listen, like to all, oh no,

536
00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:17,960
Speaker 1: it wouldn't be close friends at the time, it would

537
00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:19,600
Speaker 1: have been public at the time, where I just said it, listen,

538
00:29:19,680 --> 00:29:21,120
Speaker 1: like if you are a friend of mine and like

539
00:29:21,160 --> 00:29:23,240
Speaker 1: you were not into this like type of writing or whatever,

540
00:29:23,320 --> 00:29:25,000
Speaker 1: and you don't want to follow this account anymore, like

541
00:29:25,200 --> 00:29:27,840
Speaker 1: please feel free to go. Absolutely no hard feelings like

542
00:29:27,880 --> 00:29:29,960
Speaker 1: if this just isn't your thing, like I'm not offended.

543
00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:31,480
Speaker 1: I'm just going to let you know that I'm going

544
00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:34,200
Speaker 1: to be doing this like a lot. And to me,

545
00:29:34,320 --> 00:29:36,920
Speaker 1: that kind of helped ease the transition where I was like, look,

546
00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:39,080
Speaker 1: just fyi you guys, like I'm going for this thing,

547
00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:41,719
Speaker 1: like you don't, Like, I'm not genuinely not infunded if

548
00:29:41,760 --> 00:29:44,160
Speaker 1: you are not into it. It's like, you know, it's

549
00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:46,760
Speaker 1: like a genre of any kind of music or writing.

550
00:29:46,760 --> 00:29:48,160
Speaker 1: It like if you're not into it, you're not into it.

551
00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:51,920
Speaker 1: And that's okay. I've always believed in there was this

552
00:29:54,240 --> 00:29:56,360
Speaker 1: the artist's name is escaping me right now, but there's

553
00:29:56,440 --> 00:29:58,880
Speaker 1: this quote it's actually in the book, by the way

554
00:29:59,080 --> 00:30:01,360
Speaker 1: the piece is put together create a semblance of the whole.

555
00:30:01,680 --> 00:30:06,120
Speaker 1: And I really have like lived that and seen and

556
00:30:06,280 --> 00:30:08,680
Speaker 1: come to understand the power of that, which is like,

557
00:30:09,000 --> 00:30:12,160
Speaker 1: if you show up to the world as a writer,

558
00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:15,280
Speaker 1: every single time they experience you, like they start to

559
00:30:15,320 --> 00:30:17,280
Speaker 1: think of you that way. And when they start to

560
00:30:17,280 --> 00:30:18,840
Speaker 1: think of you that way, they start to treat you

561
00:30:18,880 --> 00:30:20,480
Speaker 1: that way. When they're to treat you that way, it's

562
00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:22,240
Speaker 1: like all these doors start to open up, Like you

563
00:30:22,280 --> 00:30:25,200
Speaker 1: start getting the calls, you know what I mean. Whereas

564
00:30:25,240 --> 00:30:28,160
Speaker 1: like if it was you know, every fifth or sixth

565
00:30:28,160 --> 00:30:30,480
Speaker 1: time I'm showing up, I'm like in the writer hat.

566
00:30:30,920 --> 00:30:33,560
Speaker 1: They perceive it as something I kind of do, so

567
00:30:33,720 --> 00:30:36,880
Speaker 1: I'm not as serious about and so I think there's

568
00:30:36,920 --> 00:30:42,040
Speaker 1: like a real like art to like how we show

569
00:30:42,160 --> 00:30:45,320
Speaker 1: up and where and to whom, and like how consistently

570
00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:49,920
Speaker 1: and trust me, I know, to each their own one.

571
00:30:50,040 --> 00:30:53,400
Speaker 1: I just mean for my own self, it was showing

572
00:30:53,480 --> 00:30:55,840
Speaker 1: up for this like basically come hell or high water,

573
00:30:56,040 --> 00:30:58,120
Speaker 1: like NonStop for years and years and years and years

574
00:30:58,200 --> 00:30:59,160
Speaker 1: years was the answer.

575
00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:08,840
Speaker 2: Taking a break from today's episode to give some love

576
00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:12,360
Speaker 2: to my sponsor at Brooks Running, I am ready to

577
00:31:12,400 --> 00:31:17,000
Speaker 2: scream it from the rooftops. The new Brooks glycerin twenty

578
00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:22,200
Speaker 2: two is one of my favorite staple sneakers in my

579
00:31:22,360 --> 00:31:26,560
Speaker 2: current rotation. I did my twelve mile run in it

580
00:31:26,640 --> 00:31:31,480
Speaker 2: last weekend. I did some mile repeats in it last

581
00:31:31,520 --> 00:31:35,640
Speaker 2: week and it felt so freeing on both. I love

582
00:31:35,680 --> 00:31:38,600
Speaker 2: a sneaker understatement that you don't think twice about when

583
00:31:38,600 --> 00:31:41,120
Speaker 2: it's on your feet, so I want something that feels

584
00:31:41,160 --> 00:31:45,160
Speaker 2: like a second skin. And the glcerin twenty two delivers.

585
00:31:45,520 --> 00:31:48,760
Speaker 2: It felt cushioned and distraction free and allowed me to

586
00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:53,560
Speaker 2: be really present in my movement. Life is hard enough already.

587
00:31:53,800 --> 00:31:58,320
Speaker 2: You don't need a sneaker to add on to the

588
00:31:58,440 --> 00:32:04,760
Speaker 2: daily frustrations. Right you want to feel comfortable on your run. Plus,

589
00:32:04,920 --> 00:32:07,840
Speaker 2: the double jack card knit upper is like a second skin.

590
00:32:07,920 --> 00:32:11,560
Speaker 2: It offers a flexible, accommodating fit that moves with me

591
00:32:11,640 --> 00:32:15,880
Speaker 2: regardless of pace. Lastly, got to give some love to

592
00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:20,240
Speaker 2: the foam in this shoe. It's DNA tuned nitrogen infused foam,

593
00:32:20,280 --> 00:32:23,720
Speaker 2: which I know sounds fancy, but essentially it's made up

594
00:32:23,800 --> 00:32:27,120
Speaker 2: of larger cells that help provide plush landings in the

595
00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:30,640
Speaker 2: heel and smaller cells in the forefoot which make for

596
00:32:30,720 --> 00:32:32,960
Speaker 2: a super responsive toe off.

597
00:32:33,480 --> 00:32:35,520
Speaker 3: Don't just take my word for it.

598
00:32:35,640 --> 00:32:40,600
Speaker 2: Get yourself a pair of Brooks glycerin twenty two today

599
00:32:40,920 --> 00:32:45,440
Speaker 2: by heading on over to Brookserunning dot com Slash Hurdle

600
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Speaker 2: Dash podcast again that is b.

601
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Speaker 3: R O O K s r U n n I

602
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603
00:32:52,080 --> 00:32:58,040
Speaker 2: Com Slash Hurdle Dash podcast to grab yourself a pair

604
00:32:58,240 --> 00:33:03,240
Speaker 2: of the Brooks glycerin twenty two today. Also got to

605
00:33:03,280 --> 00:33:06,360
Speaker 2: give some love to my sponsor at Element the way

606
00:33:06,480 --> 00:33:09,600
Speaker 2: I was so excited to hand off an Element bottle

607
00:33:09,800 --> 00:33:15,440
Speaker 2: of delicious raspberry electrolytes to my girlfriend yesterday while running

608
00:33:15,720 --> 00:33:18,520
Speaker 2: the New York United Half Marathon.

609
00:33:18,960 --> 00:33:19,360
Speaker 3: Element.

610
00:33:19,840 --> 00:33:22,000
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611
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612
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613
00:33:28,320 --> 00:33:31,920
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614
00:33:32,040 --> 00:33:35,680
Speaker 2: hydration is always important, and it's not just about drinking

615
00:33:35,800 --> 00:33:41,600
Speaker 2: water being adequately hydrated. It's about optimizing your bodies fluid ratios,

616
00:33:41,800 --> 00:33:45,040
Speaker 2: which depends on so many factors, including the intake and

617
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Speaker 2: excretion of electrolytes.

618
00:33:48,040 --> 00:33:49,480
Speaker 3: That's where Element comes into the picture.

619
00:33:49,480 --> 00:33:49,720
Speaker 1: For me.

620
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621
00:33:52,280 --> 00:33:55,600
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622
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623
00:34:01,280 --> 00:34:03,160
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624
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625
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626
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Speaker 3: Head on over to drink Element dot com.

627
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628
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629
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630
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631
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Speaker 3: That's so powerful.

632
00:34:37,120 --> 00:34:40,880
Speaker 2: And I'm sitting here, I mean transparently as an individual

633
00:34:40,960 --> 00:34:44,560
Speaker 2: that does a lot of things right. I love podcasting,

634
00:34:44,600 --> 00:34:48,280
Speaker 2: I love these conversations. I'm also a contributing writer, something

635
00:34:48,320 --> 00:34:52,200
Speaker 2: that you are familiar with. I am a certified professional coach,

636
00:34:52,200 --> 00:34:53,960
Speaker 2: which you can like into a life coach, and I

637
00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:57,839
Speaker 2: love working with women and talking about values and goal

638
00:34:57,880 --> 00:35:01,560
Speaker 2: setting and things like this. But by being such a

639
00:35:01,640 --> 00:35:05,720
Speaker 2: multi hyphen it, it's almost as though I'm watering down,

640
00:35:06,280 --> 00:35:09,239
Speaker 2: albeit unintentionally, so many of my skills.

641
00:35:10,640 --> 00:35:13,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you know, obviously, like there's so much power

642
00:35:13,640 --> 00:35:16,400
Speaker 1: and beauty to being a multi hyphenit, so like you know,

643
00:35:16,520 --> 00:35:20,279
Speaker 1: that's like and I think that when we become like

644
00:35:20,360 --> 00:35:23,799
Speaker 1: our most actualized selves, I think more of us lean

645
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:27,480
Speaker 1: in that direction than not. But there's like a to me,

646
00:35:27,600 --> 00:35:29,719
Speaker 1: there's a difference between like what I have going on

647
00:35:29,800 --> 00:35:31,960
Speaker 1: in my life and when I'm showing you do you

648
00:35:31,960 --> 00:35:34,440
Speaker 1: know what I mean? And I try to be strategic

649
00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:38,960
Speaker 1: about that because it begins to form the perception in

650
00:35:39,640 --> 00:35:42,120
Speaker 1: It's again, it's not just about how people think of you,

651
00:35:42,320 --> 00:35:44,879
Speaker 1: it's how they interact with you. It's like the opportunities

652
00:35:44,920 --> 00:35:47,279
Speaker 1: they call you for. Oh my gosh, that had such

653
00:35:47,320 --> 00:35:48,920
Speaker 1: a good example of this the other day. So I

654
00:35:48,920 --> 00:35:50,759
Speaker 1: don't even post photos of myself for years and years

655
00:35:50,760 --> 00:35:52,440
Speaker 1: and years and years and years. It was just the writing.

656
00:35:52,440 --> 00:35:53,680
Speaker 1: I was like, I just have to get the writing

657
00:35:53,680 --> 00:35:58,680
Speaker 1: out there, and like, I went hard and I don't know,

658
00:35:58,719 --> 00:36:01,839
Speaker 1: I posted a phote because I'm trying to like bring

659
00:36:01,880 --> 00:36:03,840
Speaker 1: my soul back into it again. And I posted a

660
00:36:03,840 --> 00:36:05,719
Speaker 1: photo myself. What I got, I'm not even kidding you.

661
00:36:06,200 --> 00:36:09,960
Speaker 1: It was something like seven I forget the number of

662
00:36:10,080 --> 00:36:14,680
Speaker 1: requests to speak. And I was so floored by this.

663
00:36:14,840 --> 00:36:17,560
Speaker 1: I was like, where is this all coming from? And

664
00:36:17,880 --> 00:36:20,319
Speaker 1: it was just from seeing me. And I was like,

665
00:36:20,360 --> 00:36:23,880
Speaker 1: but this again is a further testimony and testament I

666
00:36:23,880 --> 00:36:27,040
Speaker 1: should say to like when we show up in a

667
00:36:27,080 --> 00:36:30,400
Speaker 1: certain way, like it kind of has this like mirroring effect,

668
00:36:30,520 --> 00:36:31,759
Speaker 1: do you know what I mean? It's like the most

669
00:36:31,880 --> 00:36:34,080
Speaker 1: like have this realization. So it's I think it's more

670
00:36:34,080 --> 00:36:37,160
Speaker 1: of a question of like in this part of your

671
00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:39,080
Speaker 1: life in this moment, whatever you're trying to build, whatever

672
00:36:39,080 --> 00:36:41,560
Speaker 1: you're trying to create, it's like, what do I want

673
00:36:41,600 --> 00:36:45,520
Speaker 1: to show up and like expand in my life? And

674
00:36:45,600 --> 00:36:47,120
Speaker 1: I think there's like a way to have a beautiful

675
00:36:47,160 --> 00:36:49,520
Speaker 1: balance of it. But I just will say that for me,

676
00:36:50,800 --> 00:36:53,920
Speaker 1: hyper focusing on that when I get questions about like

677
00:36:54,080 --> 00:36:59,400
Speaker 1: work life balance, which I am completely unequipped to answer,

678
00:36:59,560 --> 00:37:01,560
Speaker 1: and I I don't have any good answers because I'm like,

679
00:37:01,600 --> 00:37:04,760
Speaker 1: I don't know, because the only time things have ever

680
00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:09,000
Speaker 1: like truly truly worked for me is when I've been

681
00:37:09,080 --> 00:37:11,800
Speaker 1: willing to go into a chapter of not having balance

682
00:37:11,840 --> 00:37:14,000
Speaker 1: with it. Do you know what I mean? Where it's like, well,

683
00:37:14,040 --> 00:37:15,960
Speaker 1: you know, I'm going to go all into this for

684
00:37:16,000 --> 00:37:19,560
Speaker 1: a period of time and obvious doesn't mean neglect your

685
00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:22,200
Speaker 1: health and well being helping that, but like you know,

686
00:37:22,239 --> 00:37:23,840
Speaker 1: I'm going to go all and I'm going to devote

687
00:37:23,960 --> 00:37:26,640
Speaker 1: I'm going to be with this and be about this

688
00:37:26,880 --> 00:37:30,080
Speaker 1: and be unwavering in it. And that for me was

689
00:37:30,160 --> 00:37:32,600
Speaker 1: always what created the momentum to make it go where

690
00:37:32,600 --> 00:37:34,680
Speaker 1: I wanted to go. And then you know, kind of

691
00:37:34,760 --> 00:37:36,279
Speaker 1: once things were moving like that, I was like Okay, I

692
00:37:36,440 --> 00:37:38,960
Speaker 1: bring other elements of my life back in now. But

693
00:37:39,080 --> 00:37:41,200
Speaker 1: even if I'm like leading up to like a book

694
00:37:41,280 --> 00:37:45,360
Speaker 1: launch or something like, I will like be very intentional about,

695
00:37:45,840 --> 00:37:49,799
Speaker 1: you know, leading with what I want people to respond, Tom.

696
00:37:50,360 --> 00:37:52,600
Speaker 2: Have you ever had an experience going all in that

697
00:37:52,640 --> 00:37:53,440
Speaker 2: you regretted it?

698
00:37:53,960 --> 00:37:56,879
Speaker 1: Never? But I think it's because I've never gone all

699
00:37:56,920 --> 00:38:01,479
Speaker 1: in unless I was sure. It's not something I would

700
00:38:01,760 --> 00:38:05,040
Speaker 1: I do or have ever done lightly, And honestly, I

701
00:38:05,160 --> 00:38:06,560
Speaker 1: probably dragged my feet.

702
00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:10,439
Speaker 3: On I'm gonna have to go all in next week.

703
00:38:10,480 --> 00:38:11,680
Speaker 3: I'm just not ready yet.

704
00:38:12,080 --> 00:38:14,520
Speaker 1: Ready yet I would like, yeah, I would kind of

705
00:38:14,600 --> 00:38:17,160
Speaker 1: like almost like resist or like self sabotage a little,

706
00:38:17,160 --> 00:38:19,279
Speaker 1: just because I was like, am I sure? And I

707
00:38:19,320 --> 00:38:22,400
Speaker 1: also I think that's like beautiful too. It's just like,

708
00:38:22,440 --> 00:38:24,480
Speaker 1: you know, it's kind of this like testing process of

709
00:38:24,560 --> 00:38:28,000
Speaker 1: like are we sure? And I think that's okay. It's

710
00:38:28,040 --> 00:38:31,120
Speaker 1: like dating before marriage kind of thing, do you know

711
00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:33,239
Speaker 1: what I mean? It's like, it's okay, it's okay to

712
00:38:33,280 --> 00:38:36,800
Speaker 1: have that have a testing to make sure you have

713
00:38:36,920 --> 00:38:40,040
Speaker 1: this much resolve and certainty before you devote just so

714
00:38:40,160 --> 00:38:43,040
Speaker 1: much of your time and resources and energy and life

715
00:38:43,120 --> 00:38:44,640
Speaker 1: to something. Do you know what I mean. And there's

716
00:38:45,360 --> 00:38:49,480
Speaker 1: so much that all came together to give me the

717
00:38:49,520 --> 00:38:52,960
Speaker 1: skills they needed to go all in that I gathered

718
00:38:53,360 --> 00:38:55,759
Speaker 1: while I was parsed out on different things, do you

719
00:38:55,800 --> 00:38:58,080
Speaker 1: know what I mean? It's like they everything served a

720
00:38:58,080 --> 00:39:02,879
Speaker 1: purpose ultimately. But you know, I do know people, though,

721
00:39:02,920 --> 00:39:05,440
Speaker 1: who have gone all in on things and have regreded

722
00:39:05,440 --> 00:39:08,560
Speaker 1: it pretty consistently. Listen, there's someone I'm not thinking of,

723
00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:11,399
Speaker 1: but pretty consistently. It's like not something they thought about

724
00:39:11,440 --> 00:39:13,480
Speaker 1: for a long time, you know what I mean. By

725
00:39:13,520 --> 00:39:15,960
Speaker 1: the time I was like, okay, I'm all in on books,

726
00:39:16,000 --> 00:39:18,600
Speaker 1: like I had published my first one like eight ten

727
00:39:18,680 --> 00:39:19,840
Speaker 1: years ago, do you know what I mean? Like it

728
00:39:19,880 --> 00:39:22,080
Speaker 1: had been a while of Okay, we're here now.

729
00:39:22,480 --> 00:39:25,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, But I really you had really thought about it.

730
00:39:25,320 --> 00:39:27,359
Speaker 2: There were a lot of tools that you already had

731
00:39:27,360 --> 00:39:29,719
Speaker 2: in your toolbox that you were ready to use to execute.

732
00:39:30,239 --> 00:39:34,200
Speaker 1: Yeah. And I don't advocate for or encourage the whole

733
00:39:34,239 --> 00:39:37,120
Speaker 1: like starving artist thing, and I don't believe in it.

734
00:39:37,200 --> 00:39:37,879
Speaker 1: They don't like it.

735
00:39:38,080 --> 00:39:40,040
Speaker 2: I feel like going all in when you're an author,

736
00:39:40,080 --> 00:39:43,080
Speaker 2: it's kind of like when you move to a new city,

737
00:39:43,120 --> 00:39:45,000
Speaker 2: Like when I moved to New York City. I was

738
00:39:45,040 --> 00:39:48,359
Speaker 2: told that I needed to have six months of a

739
00:39:48,360 --> 00:39:51,200
Speaker 2: certain amount of expenses ready at any given moment.

740
00:39:51,320 --> 00:39:53,920
Speaker 3: Right. I didn't just move and say I'm going to

741
00:39:53,960 --> 00:39:54,560
Speaker 3: figure it out.

742
00:39:54,960 --> 00:39:57,160
Speaker 2: I you know, when I had those six months of

743
00:39:57,160 --> 00:39:59,920
Speaker 2: a cushion, was like, Okay, I can now move to

744
00:40:00,000 --> 00:40:01,919
Speaker 2: New York City and then I'll figure it out.

745
00:40:02,280 --> 00:40:06,040
Speaker 1: Yes. And for a lot of the many of those

746
00:40:06,080 --> 00:40:09,600
Speaker 1: first years, I was doing other things that like pay

747
00:40:09,680 --> 00:40:12,799
Speaker 1: the bills, you know what I mean. Yeah, but I didn't.

748
00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:15,240
Speaker 1: That didn't even really matter to me. I didn't coher

749
00:40:15,320 --> 00:40:17,279
Speaker 1: it into that identity, you know what I mean. Like

750
00:40:17,360 --> 00:40:19,399
Speaker 1: it was like whatever pays the bills, don't even care.

751
00:40:20,200 --> 00:40:22,920
Speaker 1: It's like the way I want the world to receive

752
00:40:23,080 --> 00:40:25,640
Speaker 1: me is as this, because this is where I'm like heading.

753
00:40:26,160 --> 00:40:29,280
Speaker 1: And also that like not only is that not a failure,

754
00:40:29,320 --> 00:40:31,239
Speaker 1: it's like every person you know, even like the most

755
00:40:31,280 --> 00:40:35,239
Speaker 1: successful person you know, like has like a wildly diversified

756
00:40:35,280 --> 00:40:38,120
Speaker 1: way of like getting their needs met or like their

757
00:40:38,160 --> 00:40:40,520
Speaker 1: investments or whatever it is they have going on. And

758
00:40:40,560 --> 00:40:44,880
Speaker 1: it's really for pretty much nobody. It's never just like

759
00:40:44,960 --> 00:40:47,560
Speaker 1: one thing. But I think there can be at least

760
00:40:47,560 --> 00:40:49,239
Speaker 1: there is for me, a difference between like, you know, well,

761
00:40:49,239 --> 00:40:51,759
Speaker 1: here's why I consistently show up versus it's like you

762
00:40:51,760 --> 00:40:53,840
Speaker 1: about all these things happening behind the scenes, but not

763
00:40:53,960 --> 00:40:56,560
Speaker 1: everything to me is like for the public.

764
00:40:56,480 --> 00:41:00,200
Speaker 2: I understand what you're saying, and I think that it's

765
00:41:00,280 --> 00:41:03,960
Speaker 2: how you view what you're sharing and what the purpose

766
00:41:04,239 --> 00:41:06,120
Speaker 2: of the share is.

767
00:41:06,440 --> 00:41:09,360
Speaker 1: And how few people, I think, even pause for a

768
00:41:09,360 --> 00:41:12,880
Speaker 1: second in their lives whatever they're doing, to be like,

769
00:41:13,360 --> 00:41:17,440
Speaker 1: what is my intention with this? Why do you know

770
00:41:17,520 --> 00:41:20,040
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. I've had this theory for a while

771
00:41:20,080 --> 00:41:23,000
Speaker 1: that we have about thirteen seconds a week of people's

772
00:41:23,320 --> 00:41:27,520
Speaker 1: true attention thirteen Yeah, and again there's like I don't

773
00:41:27,520 --> 00:41:29,640
Speaker 1: know how I came up with this, but like, over time,

774
00:41:29,680 --> 00:41:31,560
Speaker 1: I've just felt this more and more true. So you

775
00:41:31,600 --> 00:41:35,440
Speaker 1: know what, someone disproved me, please, but I have always

776
00:41:35,440 --> 00:41:38,920
Speaker 1: felt it and I've seen it where it's like you

777
00:41:38,960 --> 00:41:41,440
Speaker 1: have about thirteen seconds a week of people's like true

778
00:41:41,600 --> 00:41:44,520
Speaker 1: pure attention, Like you have that much time to really

779
00:41:44,560 --> 00:41:48,320
Speaker 1: make them notice something, and then past that they can

780
00:41:48,560 --> 00:41:53,080
Speaker 1: observe it or experience it that they don't fully connect

781
00:41:53,080 --> 00:41:57,320
Speaker 1: with it with that like completeness, and so it doesn't

782
00:41:57,360 --> 00:42:00,479
Speaker 1: matter what else you're doing after the thirteen seconds. It's

783
00:42:00,760 --> 00:42:03,440
Speaker 1: just a matter of making sure you know what you're

784
00:42:03,520 --> 00:42:04,799
Speaker 1: using those thirteen seconds on.

785
00:42:05,080 --> 00:42:06,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's an interesting theory.

786
00:42:06,880 --> 00:42:11,080
Speaker 2: The thirteen second approach, so to speak, has been something

787
00:42:11,200 --> 00:42:14,719
Speaker 2: in your toolbox that has helped you a mass of

788
00:42:14,760 --> 00:42:17,560
Speaker 2: following of over a million people who are now then

789
00:42:17,600 --> 00:42:23,319
Speaker 2: converting into fans of these books. You talk so much

790
00:42:23,320 --> 00:42:27,239
Speaker 2: about how you are portraying yourself online and what it

791
00:42:27,280 --> 00:42:31,000
Speaker 2: is that you are trying to provide from a value perspective,

792
00:42:31,440 --> 00:42:33,959
Speaker 2: what it is that people see when they show up

793
00:42:34,160 --> 00:42:37,440
Speaker 2: to your corner of the internet. But when you look

794
00:42:37,560 --> 00:42:41,520
Speaker 2: in the mirror, Brianna, what do you see looking back

795
00:42:41,560 --> 00:42:41,839
Speaker 2: at you.

796
00:42:42,760 --> 00:42:44,759
Speaker 1: I don't see like a writer. I just see like

797
00:42:44,760 --> 00:42:47,760
Speaker 1: a person. Like I feel like I see the same

798
00:42:47,800 --> 00:42:50,080
Speaker 1: thing that I saw when I was like a kid,

799
00:42:51,280 --> 00:42:54,880
Speaker 1: which I think is good. But like I also something

800
00:42:54,880 --> 00:42:59,600
Speaker 1: that I've had to work on bridging is cognitive dissonance

801
00:43:00,440 --> 00:43:03,960
Speaker 1: between like I still feel like the same person in

802
00:43:03,960 --> 00:43:06,880
Speaker 1: a studio apartment twelve years ago who wrote those books,

803
00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:10,839
Speaker 1: Like internally I don't feel it, and then there's this

804
00:43:10,960 --> 00:43:13,680
Speaker 1: big cognitive dissonance of but the world doesn't see you

805
00:43:13,719 --> 00:43:15,120
Speaker 1: that way. Do you know what I mean. So it's

806
00:43:15,160 --> 00:43:18,839
Speaker 1: like how I feel and how it's like changed, and

807
00:43:18,920 --> 00:43:22,000
Speaker 1: so it takes a little bit of like maturing, I think,

808
00:43:23,040 --> 00:43:24,920
Speaker 1: and kind of just like pacing and like meeting the

809
00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:29,640
Speaker 1: moment and what things are now. But I just see

810
00:43:29,680 --> 00:43:37,000
Speaker 1: someone who's trying. I'm so serious. I'm so I'm actually

811
00:43:37,080 --> 00:43:41,000
Speaker 1: so serious. I just really see someone that's like just

812
00:43:41,120 --> 00:43:42,359
Speaker 1: it's just trying, Like.

813
00:43:42,320 --> 00:43:44,879
Speaker 3: For real, what's the genuine why?

814
00:43:45,880 --> 00:43:49,400
Speaker 2: What is the thing that kept you writing in the

815
00:43:49,440 --> 00:43:55,880
Speaker 2: studio apartment. What is the thing that encourages you to

816
00:43:55,960 --> 00:43:58,680
Speaker 2: do that level of maturing so that you can keep

817
00:43:58,760 --> 00:44:01,520
Speaker 2: showing up to these words to paper.

818
00:44:02,080 --> 00:44:06,080
Speaker 1: Doing it saved and changed my life. Doing it is

819
00:44:06,920 --> 00:44:11,600
Speaker 1: my main therapeutic practice. It's how I reframe anything and everything.

820
00:44:11,840 --> 00:44:13,840
Speaker 1: Anytime I needed an answer and didn't have it, I

821
00:44:13,880 --> 00:44:15,600
Speaker 1: would just make one up. I would just write it

822
00:44:15,640 --> 00:44:18,680
Speaker 1: down for myself, and it would change how I felt,

823
00:44:18,719 --> 00:44:20,600
Speaker 1: how I was experiencing the world, what I was seeing.

824
00:44:20,600 --> 00:44:23,960
Speaker 1: And it's like whether people are reading it or not,

825
00:44:24,800 --> 00:44:27,960
Speaker 1: like it doesn't even matter, because it's like the experience

826
00:44:28,080 --> 00:44:32,000
Speaker 1: of creating it for myself had had and has such

827
00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:38,160
Speaker 1: an impact that it is intrinsically rewarding for me, and

828
00:44:38,239 --> 00:44:41,080
Speaker 1: then everything else is just amazing on top of it.

829
00:44:41,120 --> 00:44:43,799
Speaker 1: But it's also like it kind of has to be that,

830
00:44:43,840 --> 00:44:47,120
Speaker 1: like we were saying, because it's like, not everyone's going to,

831
00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:49,759
Speaker 1: you know, meet the book the same way. Sometimes it

832
00:44:49,800 --> 00:44:52,759
Speaker 1: takes eight years for them to even know it's out there,

833
00:44:52,760 --> 00:44:54,680
Speaker 1: do you know what I mean? So it's like you

834
00:44:54,840 --> 00:44:56,719
Speaker 1: have to be so true with it because you know

835
00:44:56,840 --> 00:44:58,680
Speaker 1: it's again, like it really is a process.

836
00:44:59,719 --> 00:45:03,839
Speaker 3: When you say it saved you, what do you mean

837
00:45:03,840 --> 00:45:04,200
Speaker 3: by that?

838
00:45:04,840 --> 00:45:07,080
Speaker 1: I mean that in a really literal, like mental health way,

839
00:45:07,360 --> 00:45:12,000
Speaker 1: but I also mean it in a kind of broader way,

840
00:45:12,239 --> 00:45:15,520
Speaker 1: and just I think it saved me from myself, and

841
00:45:15,560 --> 00:45:20,200
Speaker 1: I think it saved me from making worse decisions than

842
00:45:20,239 --> 00:45:23,640
Speaker 1: I was already making because I was actively trying to

843
00:45:23,719 --> 00:45:28,960
Speaker 1: like reframe my mind and think about my future self

844
00:45:29,840 --> 00:45:31,799
Speaker 1: more than my present discomfort.

845
00:45:33,000 --> 00:45:34,680
Speaker 2: I'm trying to like put myself in the shoes of

846
00:45:34,680 --> 00:45:36,640
Speaker 2: someone who's like hearing you, and you're like, writing helps

847
00:45:36,640 --> 00:45:38,680
Speaker 2: save my life and it helped me make better decisions

848
00:45:38,680 --> 00:45:41,160
Speaker 2: and all these things, and that sounds so well and good,

849
00:45:41,239 --> 00:45:43,920
Speaker 2: but it's not like that happened in any sort of

850
00:45:43,920 --> 00:45:46,759
Speaker 2: an immediate time frame. So for someone right now that

851
00:45:46,880 --> 00:45:49,680
Speaker 2: is maybe thinking, Okay, I'm looking for solace or I

852
00:45:49,719 --> 00:45:52,040
Speaker 2: need to save myself, or I am standing in my

853
00:45:52,120 --> 00:45:54,399
Speaker 2: own way, what do you say to them?

854
00:45:54,600 --> 00:45:54,759
Speaker 3: Right?

855
00:45:54,800 --> 00:45:57,240
Speaker 2: Because you had to hold on to something to keep

856
00:45:57,320 --> 00:45:59,120
Speaker 2: going when it wasn't happening.

857
00:45:59,120 --> 00:46:01,960
Speaker 3: And I'm going to use air quotes on this fast enough.

858
00:46:01,920 --> 00:46:05,359
Speaker 1: Read and not even my books, seriously, not even mine,

859
00:46:05,840 --> 00:46:10,160
Speaker 1: like read because it did happen for me instantly, and

860
00:46:10,200 --> 00:46:16,000
Speaker 1: it was through reading other people's wisdom, other people's reframes,

861
00:46:16,120 --> 00:46:19,600
Speaker 1: other people's thoughts. That was kind of the original experience.

862
00:46:20,760 --> 00:46:23,640
Speaker 1: And then writing was kind of me just taking on

863
00:46:23,719 --> 00:46:26,920
Speaker 1: that practice for my own self. But the origin of

864
00:46:26,960 --> 00:46:32,959
Speaker 1: it was me finding other people who wrote the way

865
00:46:33,000 --> 00:46:37,000
Speaker 1: that I needed and wanted to think. And that's really

866
00:46:37,000 --> 00:46:38,799
Speaker 1: what changed my life. And then I just became the

867
00:46:38,840 --> 00:46:42,279
Speaker 1: person creating it.

868
00:46:42,760 --> 00:46:47,839
Speaker 2: Yeah, when someone in that vein, they look at you

869
00:46:47,880 --> 00:46:50,920
Speaker 2: as this person that's creating the reality or the thought

870
00:46:50,960 --> 00:46:54,200
Speaker 2: processes that they too want to adopt. They look at

871
00:46:54,200 --> 00:46:56,359
Speaker 2: you maybe and I know this word gets thrown around

872
00:46:56,440 --> 00:46:59,160
Speaker 2: a little bit, but as a bit of a guru

873
00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:02,520
Speaker 2: of thousands that every morning I get up and I

874
00:47:02,560 --> 00:47:05,920
Speaker 2: pick up your book the impact is real and the

875
00:47:05,960 --> 00:47:11,239
Speaker 2: impact is there, and when you hear that, what does

876
00:47:11,280 --> 00:47:12,399
Speaker 2: that insight within you?

877
00:47:13,080 --> 00:47:15,439
Speaker 3: It makes me laugh someime.

878
00:47:17,080 --> 00:47:19,600
Speaker 1: I was just like so not just that it makes

879
00:47:19,600 --> 00:47:24,040
Speaker 1: me laugh, like oh God. But then my mind goes

880
00:47:24,080 --> 00:47:31,680
Speaker 1: to what I hope you feel is a friend who

881
00:47:32,239 --> 00:47:37,399
Speaker 1: is walking a parallel path or has walked there is

882
00:47:37,440 --> 00:47:41,600
Speaker 1: nothing you could go through that at least one other person,

883
00:47:41,719 --> 00:47:45,000
Speaker 1: if not many have not gone through some form of

884
00:47:45,560 --> 00:47:50,319
Speaker 1: as well. And I know it feels like you know

885
00:47:51,440 --> 00:47:56,799
Speaker 1: there's something like wrong with you and only you, and

886
00:47:56,840 --> 00:48:00,000
Speaker 1: it's like to realize how much that isn't the case,

887
00:48:00,239 --> 00:48:03,080
Speaker 1: like ah, what an exhale, like Okay, we can figure

888
00:48:03,080 --> 00:48:03,439
Speaker 1: this out.

889
00:48:04,480 --> 00:48:07,200
Speaker 2: On your journey, you mentioned that there have been so

890
00:48:07,320 --> 00:48:09,440
Speaker 2: many hurdles to get you to where you are, to

891
00:48:09,520 --> 00:48:13,120
Speaker 2: being in this place where you're just releasing this newest book.

892
00:48:13,719 --> 00:48:18,279
Speaker 2: Were there any hurdles in particular that almost hassuaded you

893
00:48:18,320 --> 00:48:20,040
Speaker 2: from continuing on the path at all?

894
00:48:20,880 --> 00:48:28,239
Speaker 1: Oh? Yeah, lots, I think the I really think the

895
00:48:28,280 --> 00:48:31,320
Speaker 1: biggest and most consistent one over time is the fear

896
00:48:31,360 --> 00:48:36,920
Speaker 1: of what other people would think and that their judgment

897
00:48:37,040 --> 00:48:40,360
Speaker 1: or perception would dominate over my own and would become

898
00:48:40,480 --> 00:48:43,560
Speaker 1: who I am? What if everyone hates me? Do you

899
00:48:43,600 --> 00:48:45,360
Speaker 1: know what I mean? Like what I everyone thinks I'm stupid?

900
00:48:45,440 --> 00:48:50,399
Speaker 1: Like it's these fears I think held me back more

901
00:48:50,440 --> 00:48:54,040
Speaker 1: than anything. And I feel like everyone I talked to

902
00:48:54,320 --> 00:48:57,560
Speaker 1: has some version of that as well. It's like it's

903
00:48:57,560 --> 00:48:59,720
Speaker 1: like a fear of failure, but like for all various

904
00:48:59,719 --> 00:49:02,400
Speaker 1: different reasons we had, like who were disappointing? Who are

905
00:49:02,400 --> 00:49:04,600
Speaker 1: we feeling embarrassed in front of? Like the love we

906
00:49:04,640 --> 00:49:06,799
Speaker 1: won't get because we're not x y Z. It's like

907
00:49:06,840 --> 00:49:09,160
Speaker 1: it comes out in all these different ways, but it's

908
00:49:09,200 --> 00:49:12,759
Speaker 1: just that like fundamental like sense of like do I

909
00:49:12,800 --> 00:49:14,960
Speaker 1: believe in this? And I'm sure I believe in this

910
00:49:15,160 --> 00:49:20,279
Speaker 1: enough to keep going even if I fail. And the

911
00:49:20,320 --> 00:49:22,359
Speaker 1: way I kept finding my way back to that yes,

912
00:49:22,680 --> 00:49:26,480
Speaker 1: is if this is not for anyone but just for me,

913
00:49:26,880 --> 00:49:29,600
Speaker 1: that is enough. It was enough and continues to be

914
00:49:29,760 --> 00:49:34,360
Speaker 1: and that's like kept me on it. And you know,

915
00:49:34,719 --> 00:49:42,280
Speaker 1: also just you know, not allowing the noise I think

916
00:49:43,320 --> 00:49:49,920
Speaker 1: two become your only reality or to fear you know,

917
00:49:50,640 --> 00:49:52,839
Speaker 1: what could happen more than just kind of meeting this

918
00:49:52,880 --> 00:49:55,640
Speaker 1: moment with your you know, your eyes chest and two

919
00:49:55,680 --> 00:49:57,720
Speaker 1: feet on the floor and being like, hey, I can,

920
00:49:58,280 --> 00:50:02,839
Speaker 1: I am capable, I and yes I'm here. I say, yes,

921
00:50:02,960 --> 00:50:06,239
Speaker 1: I'm doing this and I will figure it out one

922
00:50:06,280 --> 00:50:06,920
Speaker 1: way or another.

923
00:50:07,239 --> 00:50:10,799
Speaker 2: It reminds me of that line in one hundred and

924
00:50:10,800 --> 00:50:15,360
Speaker 2: one Essays, and you wrote, stop asking what am I

925
00:50:15,400 --> 00:50:18,000
Speaker 2: doing with my life? And start asking what am I

926
00:50:18,040 --> 00:50:21,920
Speaker 2: doing with my life today? It's so challenging to focus

927
00:50:21,960 --> 00:50:22,960
Speaker 2: on today.

928
00:50:22,880 --> 00:50:26,920
Speaker 1: Right, No, it really is.

929
00:50:28,239 --> 00:50:29,640
Speaker 3: It is it is.

930
00:50:30,040 --> 00:50:32,959
Speaker 2: And so I mean, practically, as we start to wind

931
00:50:33,000 --> 00:50:37,839
Speaker 2: down here, how does someone get better about being in

932
00:50:37,880 --> 00:50:42,200
Speaker 2: the present and, as you stated, so beautifully being where

933
00:50:42,200 --> 00:50:46,520
Speaker 2: their own two feet are, rather than thinking too far ahead.

934
00:50:46,680 --> 00:50:49,600
Speaker 1: I think that the reason it feels so difficult for

935
00:50:49,680 --> 00:50:51,520
Speaker 1: us to just completely let go and be all the

936
00:50:51,520 --> 00:50:54,239
Speaker 1: way in the moment is because that's not how we're

937
00:50:54,280 --> 00:50:58,680
Speaker 1: actually supposed to be. It's that our dominant focus has

938
00:50:58,719 --> 00:51:03,160
Speaker 1: to be in the moment whilst simultaneously kind of gazing

939
00:51:03,280 --> 00:51:07,160
Speaker 1: toward the future. And that's what kind of allows us

940
00:51:07,160 --> 00:51:12,000
Speaker 1: to make productive, positive choices for our future selves. And

941
00:51:12,160 --> 00:51:15,880
Speaker 1: at the same time, in some gentle way connected to

942
00:51:15,920 --> 00:51:20,160
Speaker 1: the past, where you're reflecting and gleaning wisdom and insight,

943
00:51:20,239 --> 00:51:22,600
Speaker 1: you're learning from mistakes you made you know, you're not

944
00:51:22,680 --> 00:51:25,240
Speaker 1: just kind of bulldozing your way through life, but you're

945
00:51:25,600 --> 00:51:28,840
Speaker 1: you're taking this wisdom with you, right, You're bringing it

946
00:51:28,880 --> 00:51:30,719
Speaker 1: into this moment. But at the same time, you're in

947
00:51:30,719 --> 00:51:35,160
Speaker 1: this moment and you're still you know, considering yourself tomorrow,

948
00:51:35,239 --> 00:51:37,600
Speaker 1: yourself in five years, yourself at the end of your life.

949
00:51:37,800 --> 00:51:41,279
Speaker 1: But at no time are either of those things, you know,

950
00:51:41,400 --> 00:51:44,879
Speaker 1: creating a dominance over you being right here and now.

951
00:51:45,320 --> 00:51:47,959
Speaker 1: But at least for me, I could say that every

952
00:51:47,960 --> 00:51:50,480
Speaker 1: time I've tried to like let go of it, you know,

953
00:51:50,520 --> 00:51:53,480
Speaker 1: and just be completely present, I think you almost lose

954
00:51:53,520 --> 00:51:56,279
Speaker 1: something sometimes where it's like it's more of like a

955
00:51:56,320 --> 00:52:00,400
Speaker 1: weaving of all three. But I think that people get

956
00:52:00,520 --> 00:52:03,600
Speaker 1: really stuck in like the future of the past present

957
00:52:03,640 --> 00:52:05,719
Speaker 1: feels the easiest to lose because it feels like there's

958
00:52:05,760 --> 00:52:09,120
Speaker 1: the least to deal with there. But that's actually where

959
00:52:09,239 --> 00:52:10,120
Speaker 1: everything is.

960
00:52:10,800 --> 00:52:12,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's an and both scenario.

961
00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:15,880
Speaker 2: And I think that when you get very clear on

962
00:52:16,560 --> 00:52:18,960
Speaker 2: who it is that you are, what it is that's

963
00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:22,680
Speaker 2: important to you, that allows you to have this filter

964
00:52:22,800 --> 00:52:26,400
Speaker 2: where you can be aware of what it is that

965
00:52:26,480 --> 00:52:30,560
Speaker 2: you're after for your future self and simultaneously be a

966
00:52:30,600 --> 00:52:31,440
Speaker 2: bit more in the moment.

967
00:52:31,840 --> 00:52:33,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's exactly right.

968
00:52:33,120 --> 00:52:34,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, Wow.

969
00:52:35,040 --> 00:52:38,359
Speaker 2: Well, I'm so grateful that we've had this time. There's

970
00:52:38,360 --> 00:52:41,160
Speaker 2: so much more that I could sit here and ask you.

971
00:52:41,239 --> 00:52:44,480
Speaker 2: But before I let you go, Brihanna, if you had

972
00:52:44,520 --> 00:52:47,720
Speaker 2: to offer yourself a piece of advice, let's say, going

973
00:52:47,800 --> 00:52:50,560
Speaker 2: back to one of those hurdle moments, as you sat

974
00:52:50,600 --> 00:52:55,120
Speaker 2: there and allowed the fear to be what led you

975
00:52:55,200 --> 00:52:58,839
Speaker 2: briefly to wonder to yourself, Oh my god, what am

976
00:52:58,840 --> 00:52:59,759
Speaker 2: I putting into the world?

977
00:52:59,840 --> 00:53:01,000
Speaker 3: Is what I should be doing?

978
00:53:01,680 --> 00:53:03,440
Speaker 2: If you had to offer yourself a piece of advice,

979
00:53:03,520 --> 00:53:06,200
Speaker 2: knowing what you know now going through that hurdle moment,

980
00:53:06,239 --> 00:53:07,040
Speaker 2: what would you tell.

981
00:53:06,840 --> 00:53:16,640
Speaker 1: Yourself connect to observe, witness, read about, befriend follow people

982
00:53:16,719 --> 00:53:21,120
Speaker 1: who are in their arenas, even if it's not exactly

983
00:53:21,160 --> 00:53:26,480
Speaker 1: your own. Because when you are in even a self

984
00:53:26,520 --> 00:53:31,200
Speaker 1: generated community where that forward movement is kind of the norm,

985
00:53:31,440 --> 00:53:37,440
Speaker 1: it becomes way easier to do. And you know, I

986
00:53:37,480 --> 00:53:42,560
Speaker 1: think it's sometimes really challenging to not feel defeated when

987
00:53:42,600 --> 00:53:44,960
Speaker 1: you feel like you're the only person. But you're not

988
00:53:45,120 --> 00:53:48,040
Speaker 1: the only person. It's just in this particular moment you

989
00:53:48,120 --> 00:53:53,520
Speaker 1: feel you will are disconnected from the so so many

990
00:53:53,840 --> 00:53:57,200
Speaker 1: others who are doing the same thing. So it's I think,

991
00:53:58,320 --> 00:54:03,440
Speaker 1: I think TLDR your people and let them inspire you

992
00:54:03,520 --> 00:54:08,520
Speaker 1: and encourage you and remind you. You know that you

993
00:54:09,440 --> 00:54:13,160
Speaker 1: are not going to collapse. You know, at the presence

994
00:54:13,160 --> 00:54:17,960
Speaker 1: of anyone challenge coming up, you're so much bigger than that.

995
00:54:18,560 --> 00:54:21,319
Speaker 1: And it's almost in the process of confronting that that

996
00:54:21,400 --> 00:54:25,799
Speaker 1: you realize how much bigger than it you are. But

997
00:54:25,880 --> 00:54:27,960
Speaker 1: you would never know if you didn't have the courage

998
00:54:27,960 --> 00:54:30,560
Speaker 1: to kind of face it, go through it and realize, oh,

999
00:54:31,280 --> 00:54:32,040
Speaker 1: I'm untouched.

1000
00:54:32,400 --> 00:54:34,799
Speaker 3: You just have to look at all of the different arenas.

1001
00:54:34,840 --> 00:54:35,359
Speaker 3: I love that.

1002
00:54:35,560 --> 00:54:38,279
Speaker 2: Well, I'm so again so happy that we were able

1003
00:54:38,320 --> 00:54:41,120
Speaker 2: to do this. For those that aren't following along with

1004
00:54:41,160 --> 00:54:43,520
Speaker 2: you just yet give us your inbo How do we

1005
00:54:44,000 --> 00:54:44,440
Speaker 2: keep up?

1006
00:54:44,760 --> 00:54:48,640
Speaker 1: We keep up on Instagram at Brianna Waste and my

1007
00:54:48,719 --> 00:54:51,040
Speaker 1: website Brianimes dot com that has linked to all the

1008
00:54:51,040 --> 00:54:51,760
Speaker 1: books and stuff.

1009
00:54:52,000 --> 00:54:53,600
Speaker 2: The link to all the books and stuff, and of

1010
00:54:53,600 --> 00:54:56,880
Speaker 2: course again the new book, The Life That's Waiting is

1011
00:54:56,920 --> 00:54:59,920
Speaker 2: out now. I am over at Emily a Body and

1012
00:55:00,080 --> 00:55:04,120
Speaker 2: at Hurdle Podcast Another Hurdle Conquered. Catch you guys, next time.