WEBVTT - #51 The Elliotts 0:00:03.600 --> 0:00:06.359 What I'm trying to remember. Do you have any celebrity 0:00:06.559 --> 0:00:08.080 impressions that you do? 0:00:08.640 --> 0:00:08.720 No? 0:00:09.240 --> 0:00:10.799 Didn't you used to do celindio? 0:00:11.640 --> 0:00:12.720 No, I used to. 0:00:12.760 --> 0:00:14.760 Do that the theme song to the Titanic. 0:00:16.040 --> 0:00:17.000 No, that was Karen. 0:00:17.560 --> 0:00:18.239 Karen used to. 0:00:18.160 --> 0:00:18.840 Sing that song. 0:00:19.360 --> 0:00:20.439 Karen does sing that song. 0:00:20.680 --> 0:00:21.800 Does she have a nice voice? 0:00:22.720 --> 0:00:22.919 No? 0:00:23.239 --> 0:00:25.560 Because guess who I have on the other line. Karen? 0:00:28.680 --> 0:00:29.600 Did that scare you? 0:00:30.160 --> 0:00:31.280 Did it give me a little nervous? 0:00:31.400 --> 0:00:33.240 Did it not make you feel alive? 0:00:36.440 --> 0:00:37.400 Oh? 0:00:38.080 --> 0:00:38.960 Get a little scared? 0:00:39.200 --> 0:00:39.800 A little scared. 0:00:40.520 --> 0:00:42.680 Yeah, she doesn't have a nice voice. 0:00:42.840 --> 0:00:44.160 I mean she can wait. 0:00:44.240 --> 0:00:48.559 A second, She's back on the line. It's Karen. Oh, Jackie, 0:00:48.960 --> 0:00:58.760 how could you say that about my singing? From Gimblet Media, 0:00:58.920 --> 0:01:05.839 I'm Jonathan Gold and this is Heavyweight Today's episode the Elliots. 0:01:11.319 --> 0:01:20.720 Right after the break, I get a lot of emails 0:01:20.720 --> 0:01:25.679 from people looking for help, but Dylan's stood out. Dear Jonathan, 0:01:25.880 --> 0:01:28.840 It read I have a big one for you, the 0:01:28.840 --> 0:01:34.400 heaviest weight yet. Dylan's email was over the top clickbaity 0:01:34.440 --> 0:01:36.560 even Hi Dylan, how are you? 0:01:37.360 --> 0:01:37.800 Jonathan? 0:01:38.280 --> 0:01:41.640 But who among us is inured to the lure of clickbait? 0:01:42.520 --> 0:01:45.600 Dylan Elliott lives in Dublin and the story he tells 0:01:45.640 --> 0:01:53.920 me you'll have to hear to believe. Dylan says that 0:01:54.000 --> 0:01:56.600 when he and his family get together, their favorite thing 0:01:56.640 --> 0:02:00.520 to do is share stories of their misfortune, mysterious ailments 0:02:00.520 --> 0:02:05.480 and plumbing disasters, near drownings, and dental procedures gone terribly awry. 0:02:06.360 --> 0:02:09.400 They always come away from these sessions wondering the same thing, 0:02:10.120 --> 0:02:12.960 how can one family have so much bad luck? 0:02:13.639 --> 0:02:17.519 So a few years ago, mostly large family gathering. 0:02:17.360 --> 0:02:20.320 Dylan says that at a recent family wedding, he and 0:02:20.360 --> 0:02:23.800 his brothers were going around the table enumerting their woes 0:02:23.880 --> 0:02:26.600 as usual wrong in their lives, when their father suddenly 0:02:26.600 --> 0:02:27.399 interrupted them. 0:02:27.560 --> 0:02:29.560 And then my dad came out and said, well, they 0:02:29.560 --> 0:02:31.640 don't know about the curse, the Elliot curse. 0:02:39.360 --> 0:02:42.880 Dylan and his brothers looked at each other. What elliot curse? 0:02:43.280 --> 0:02:45.880 They'd never heard of such a thing, And so their 0:02:45.919 --> 0:02:49.240 father offered what would prove to be a unifying theory 0:02:49.360 --> 0:02:52.720 of their terrible luck. He began at the beginning. 0:02:53.560 --> 0:02:57.359 The very beginning is fifteen twenty five. 0:02:58.800 --> 0:03:01.680 About five hundred years ago, Scotland and England were at 0:03:01.720 --> 0:03:05.160 war over the territory along their border. The people who 0:03:05.200 --> 0:03:07.840 lived along these borderlands were hardest head. 0:03:08.200 --> 0:03:12.519 And so they were left in this nomadic position where 0:03:12.560 --> 0:03:14.680 the only living they could make was by going back 0:03:14.720 --> 0:03:17.280 and forth across the border and thieving. 0:03:17.639 --> 0:03:21.960 Thieving, in pillaging, in maiming, as well as murdering. 0:03:22.680 --> 0:03:25.200 What they had to be as a culture was extremely 0:03:25.240 --> 0:03:29.560 friendly but also really murdery, because like, if you've got 0:03:29.560 --> 0:03:31.760 to be in moving from area to area, you had 0:03:31.760 --> 0:03:33.520 to be very open to people because there could be 0:03:33.520 --> 0:03:38.120 trades going on, but if they wrong you, you've got 0:03:38.120 --> 0:03:39.000 to kill them immediately. 0:03:40.240 --> 0:03:43.880 And these people, these friendly, murdery people who lived along 0:03:43.920 --> 0:03:50.120 the border were called border reavers. You say reavers, Yeah, reavers? 0:03:50.440 --> 0:03:51.080 What are those? 0:03:52.560 --> 0:03:54.760 It's kind of like the exact opposite of a weaver. 0:03:54.920 --> 0:03:57.800 So weavers makes clothes. Reavers were kind of like murderers. 0:03:58.520 --> 0:04:03.640 Wait, weavers make clothes, but revers are murderers. Yes, which 0:04:03.760 --> 0:04:06.440 technically isn't the opposite of making clothes. 0:04:06.680 --> 0:04:08.960 It's quite far away, though, in fairness. 0:04:08.640 --> 0:04:12.120 It is it is. But probably the opposite of making 0:04:12.120 --> 0:04:14.240 clothes would be like maybe ripping. 0:04:14.000 --> 0:04:15.600 Up clothes and stealing. 0:04:15.680 --> 0:04:19.039 I guess, yeah, again, not necessarily the opposite, but I 0:04:19.120 --> 0:04:24.640 get it. Yeah, it's the other end of the spectrum. Sorry, 0:04:25.040 --> 0:04:28.040 thank you. That's the opposite of a curse, by the way. 0:04:28.480 --> 0:04:32.520 To bring it back to opposites, Dylan says there were 0:04:32.560 --> 0:04:35.800 a number of Reaver family clans, but one of the biggest, 0:04:35.960 --> 0:04:40.640 most notorious, least weavery, and most murdery of all were 0:04:40.640 --> 0:04:44.360 the Elliots. And that's you. You're You're Dylan Elliot. 0:04:45.279 --> 0:04:46.599 Yeah. 0:04:46.640 --> 0:04:50.760 In fifteen twenty five, the then Archbishop of Glasgow, desperate 0:04:50.800 --> 0:04:54.159 to deter the Reavers, placed a curse on them, the 0:04:54.200 --> 0:04:58.120 aforementioned Elliot curse. I should read the cris to you please. 0:04:59.520 --> 0:05:02.720 I curse their heads and all the hairs of their head. 0:05:03.160 --> 0:05:06.960 I cursed their face, their brain, their mouth, their nose, 0:05:07.360 --> 0:05:11.560 their tongue, their teeth, their forehead, their shoulders, their breast, 0:05:12.000 --> 0:05:16.479 their heart, their stomach, their back, their womb, their arms, 0:05:16.760 --> 0:05:20.040 their legs, their hands, their feet, and every part of 0:05:20.080 --> 0:05:21.839 their body from the top of their head to the 0:05:21.880 --> 0:05:25.400 soles of their feet, before and behind within them without 0:05:26.240 --> 0:05:30.040 as a jew raised on Yiddish curses, my bubb is, 0:05:30.279 --> 0:05:33.560 may you hang upside down like a chandelier, most often 0:05:33.640 --> 0:05:37.400 levied against my grandfather for losing the TV remote. Was 0:05:37.440 --> 0:05:40.760 about as bad as I got it sounds worse than Yiddish, 0:05:40.800 --> 0:05:43.599 but still it's nothing compared to this curse. 0:05:44.080 --> 0:05:46.159 I cursed them going, and I curssed them writing. I 0:05:46.200 --> 0:05:48.640 curst them standing, and I cursed them sitting. Curse. 0:05:48.720 --> 0:05:51.320 This curse reads like a children's book written by a 0:05:51.360 --> 0:05:54.640 serial killer. I would curse them here or there, I 0:05:54.680 --> 0:05:56.120 would curse them anywhere. 0:05:56.400 --> 0:05:59.000 I curse them within the house, I cursed them outside 0:05:59.040 --> 0:06:01.080 of the house. I cursed them at home. I cursed 0:06:01.120 --> 0:06:10.080 them away from home. I cursed them rising, their cattle, 0:06:10.320 --> 0:06:14.520 their wool, their sheep, their barnyards, their cowsheds, their cabbage patches, 0:06:14.960 --> 0:06:17.480 even their cabbage patches, their horses. 0:06:18.120 --> 0:06:21.040 And it's not just the Reavers themselves that the Archbishop damns, 0:06:21.360 --> 0:06:23.640 but anyone remotely associated with them. 0:06:24.080 --> 0:06:26.200 I forbid all Christian men and women to have any 0:06:26.240 --> 0:06:30.839 company with them, eating, drinking, speaking, crying, lying, going, standing 0:06:31.200 --> 0:06:32.520 under the pain of deadly sin. 0:06:33.960 --> 0:06:38.880 And just when you think there's nothing left, a curse, okay. 0:06:39.320 --> 0:06:41.880 Made the thunder and lightning which rain down upon someone. 0:06:42.080 --> 0:06:46.600 For a full three minutes, Dylan continues on with wildfires 0:06:46.640 --> 0:06:51.480 and dyspepsia, pestilence, and plagues, until finally I. 0:06:51.480 --> 0:06:54.520 Condemned them perpetually to the deep pit of hell, there 0:06:54.560 --> 0:06:57.479 to remain with Lucifer and all his fellows, then ripped 0:06:57.520 --> 0:07:00.560 and torn by dogs until late forbear They're and sins 0:07:00.839 --> 0:07:04.560 and make satisfaction at Bennett's. 0:07:04.839 --> 0:07:09.880 Yeah, that's a curse. Back at the family wedding, seated 0:07:09.920 --> 0:07:12.640 around the table, Dylan says he remembers that when his 0:07:12.720 --> 0:07:15.880 dad was done reciting excerpts from the curse, he was 0:07:15.920 --> 0:07:17.400 met with stunned silence. 0:07:17.920 --> 0:07:20.520 You almost expect people to laugh when hear curs. Liked that, 0:07:20.720 --> 0:07:23.400 but there wasn't really a laugh. The reaction in the 0:07:23.440 --> 0:07:27.200 room with this kind of aha moment reference like this 0:07:27.320 --> 0:07:30.280 makes total sense. This explains why so many weird things 0:07:30.320 --> 0:07:31.520 of mont Our family. 0:07:32.160 --> 0:07:36.600 Weird and also weirdly specific to the curse. Dylan tells 0:07:36.640 --> 0:07:38.720 me about the soles of his feet he was born 0:07:38.800 --> 0:07:42.040 flat footed, and his tongue he was born tongue tied, 0:07:42.720 --> 0:07:45.320 and regarding the I curse you away from home part 0:07:45.320 --> 0:07:46.160 of the curse. 0:07:46.440 --> 0:07:49.840 Pick up mugged three days in a row in Paris, 0:07:50.120 --> 0:07:52.360 Oh my, And each morning I went out and I 0:07:52.400 --> 0:07:56.240 bought the slightly shittier phone than I had previously, until 0:07:56.240 --> 0:07:58.320 eventually I had a phone, which is like an old 0:07:58.320 --> 0:08:01.000 person's phone with giant buttons on it, and I got 0:08:01.120 --> 0:08:03.200 mugged for that one as well. So I got mugged 0:08:03.200 --> 0:08:04.680 three days in a row in Paris. 0:08:04.760 --> 0:08:08.640 Like three separate occasions by three separate muggers. 0:08:09.000 --> 0:08:11.520 Yeah, three separate muggers, three nights in a row. 0:08:11.760 --> 0:08:12.280 What is that? 0:08:12.760 --> 0:08:15.000 Doesn't that's insane? Like I think the other I was 0:08:15.000 --> 0:08:16.720 trying to work it out. I think the odds of 0:08:16.760 --> 0:08:20.760 getting mugged in a given year are zero point three percent, 0:08:21.680 --> 0:08:23.280 So what of the odds are getting mugged three days 0:08:23.320 --> 0:08:25.800 in a row. It's like getting struck by lightning. I'm 0:08:25.800 --> 0:08:27.520 winning the lottery at the same time or something. 0:08:34.640 --> 0:08:37.600 And Dylan says it's not just him. He tells me 0:08:37.640 --> 0:08:40.880 about his brother, a talented gardener who can grow anything 0:08:41.559 --> 0:08:43.400 except cabbages. 0:08:43.440 --> 0:08:46.360 The one thing that's mentioned in the Curse. The curse 0:08:46.360 --> 0:08:50.600 says I cursed their cabbage patches, and he can't grow cabbages. 0:08:50.640 --> 0:08:52.040 He can't grow brascas at all. 0:08:53.240 --> 0:08:56.080 I've been pretty successful growing all different types of vegetables. 0:08:56.440 --> 0:08:58.960 This is Dylan's younger brother, Rory Elliott. 0:08:59.280 --> 0:09:02.959 But like the cab in particular, like always seemed to 0:09:03.000 --> 0:09:06.679 be afflicted by some kind of like mold or fungus. 0:09:07.200 --> 0:09:08.600 Then there's Rory's feet. 0:09:09.040 --> 0:09:11.079 My mum always said that my feet were like out 0:09:11.080 --> 0:09:12.880 of a Buzzet's pretty much Talon's. 0:09:12.960 --> 0:09:14.280 Yeah, and his eyes. 0:09:14.640 --> 0:09:16.400 I tore my cornea. 0:09:16.679 --> 0:09:19.600 I had to wear an eyepatch. And mouth I've had 0:09:19.880 --> 0:09:22.920 so many mouth sulcters. I'm just being worried that it's 0:09:22.960 --> 0:09:25.079 like the cur is trying to stop me. Talk to 0:09:25.160 --> 0:09:25.920 you guys. 0:09:26.840 --> 0:09:29.760 Rory is a scientist, so he knows that believing in 0:09:29.840 --> 0:09:33.280 curses is crazy, but he also knows the value of 0:09:33.320 --> 0:09:38.040 hard data and the evidence is semi undeniable, Like how 0:09:38.080 --> 0:09:41.320 the archbishop curses them going and curses them riding. 0:09:42.120 --> 0:09:44.640 I see them that he had riding horses, but I 0:09:44.640 --> 0:09:46.160 guess it covers bicycles. 0:09:46.320 --> 0:09:48.040 Okay, what has happened? 0:09:48.520 --> 0:09:52.760 Like, for instance, one time I was cycling to get 0:09:52.840 --> 0:09:56.360 some seaweed to put on my crops because they weren't. 0:09:56.200 --> 0:10:00.360 Doing very well, his crops being the cabbages. He was 0:10:00.360 --> 0:10:02.800 getting seaweed for his cabbages. 0:10:02.880 --> 0:10:05.760 And there was an iron bar in the ground and 0:10:05.800 --> 0:10:08.960 then I ended up going like head over the handlebars 0:10:09.200 --> 0:10:13.600 on like flying headfirst into a dog food factory. 0:10:13.640 --> 0:10:15.880 Sorry, did you say you you flew into a dog 0:10:15.920 --> 0:10:18.240 food what a. 0:10:18.280 --> 0:10:19.240 Dog food factory? 0:10:19.880 --> 0:10:24.000 Yeah? Okay, broke my raist, I broke. 0:10:24.280 --> 0:10:30.120 My arm, need a lot of sticks. That was fairly cursed. 0:10:35.720 --> 0:10:36.160 Oh my god. 0:10:36.559 --> 0:10:42.000 Logical level not superstious at all, but I am a 0:10:42.040 --> 0:10:43.560 little bit superstious. 0:10:44.120 --> 0:10:48.360 This is Dylan's other brother, Tim Elliott. Tim is waiting 0:10:48.400 --> 0:10:51.400 to receive funding for his pH d in history. In 0:10:51.440 --> 0:10:53.000 the meantime, I'm. 0:10:52.800 --> 0:10:53.319 A sort of. 0:10:55.160 --> 0:10:56.480 Just a freelanced person. 0:10:56.960 --> 0:10:58.079 What do you freelance at? 0:10:59.320 --> 0:11:03.600 Oh, not really much. 0:11:08.840 --> 0:11:12.600 If Dylan is rather ere like and Rory is something 0:11:12.600 --> 0:11:15.800 of a negative nelly, then Tim is like Charlie Brown. 0:11:16.320 --> 0:11:19.360 If Charlie Brown were looking for PhD funding. 0:11:19.360 --> 0:11:22.600 I'm given the curse, well, I mean, who would have 0:11:22.679 --> 0:11:23.400 much hope for that? 0:11:24.520 --> 0:11:28.080 Like his brothers, Tim lists off sorrows specific to the curse. 0:11:28.600 --> 0:11:31.560 He went bald in his twenties, has teeth with holes 0:11:31.600 --> 0:11:33.160 in them, in his feet. 0:11:33.720 --> 0:11:38.720 When I was born, my feet pointed outwards, and then 0:11:38.760 --> 0:11:41.679 I was putting these shoes, so you think, okay, here 0:11:41.720 --> 0:11:45.440 comes a solution. But then they pointed inwards and we're overcorrected. 0:11:46.440 --> 0:11:50.200 Then there's the muggings. While Dylan's been mugged a poultry 0:11:50.400 --> 0:11:54.200 three times, Tim's been mugged five times. 0:11:54.920 --> 0:11:58.160 Oh yeah, one of them. I was mugged while I 0:11:58.240 --> 0:11:59.240 was dressed as a robot. 0:12:01.840 --> 0:12:03.360 I'm so sorry. 0:12:03.400 --> 0:12:06.960 That just really surprised me. It feels wrong to laugh 0:12:06.960 --> 0:12:10.920 at someone's misfortunes. But then when the follow up question 0:12:11.120 --> 0:12:14.360 you're forced to ask a grown man is why were 0:12:14.400 --> 0:12:18.240 you dressed as a robot, it seems acceptable somehow. 0:12:18.840 --> 0:12:19.600 This was Halloween. 0:12:20.640 --> 0:12:23.960 I was dressed as a robot called it's a tim 0:12:24.000 --> 0:12:26.600 Tron five thousand. I mean, I put so much effort 0:12:26.640 --> 0:12:29.760 into it. I had a set of light going on 0:12:29.800 --> 0:12:33.640 in my chest, drinking. I had a police sir on 0:12:33.679 --> 0:12:34.040 my head. 0:12:35.760 --> 0:12:38.280 I'm imagining you, like in a box, wrapped in a 0:12:38.320 --> 0:12:39.480 tinfoil or something. 0:12:40.559 --> 0:12:41.560 You're exactly. 0:12:47.000 --> 0:12:49.160 I was with a group of friends, all dressed differently. 0:12:49.200 --> 0:12:51.360 I think there was a bumblebee there as a pirate. 0:12:54.080 --> 0:12:54.800 There was. 0:12:55.120 --> 0:12:58.800 I'm sorry, Yeah, so the tim Tron five thousand, The 0:12:58.800 --> 0:13:01.840 Bumblebee and the pirates were walking along when they were 0:13:01.840 --> 0:13:05.040 suddenly approached by a group of kids. And when I 0:13:05.120 --> 0:13:06.760 say kids, there were. 0:13:06.679 --> 0:13:08.600 Young fellas who are fourteen. 0:13:09.240 --> 0:13:14.400 Really, Yeah, the ringleader demanded Tim hand over the beers 0:13:14.400 --> 0:13:18.479 he was carrying, but Tim refused, So he pulls out. 0:13:18.240 --> 0:13:22.040 This pocket knife and he says, I'm gonna you know, 0:13:22.400 --> 0:13:23.320 what do you think about this? 0:13:25.120 --> 0:13:25.200 Now? 0:13:25.320 --> 0:13:28.760 If you recall John said I'm wearing nothing for cardboard boxes. 0:13:29.120 --> 0:13:30.040 Oh, I recall. 0:13:30.640 --> 0:13:37.080 So the bumblebee, the pirates disappear, and I'm not quite 0:13:37.120 --> 0:13:39.960 as sleep of foot, and I get pushed onto my 0:13:40.200 --> 0:13:45.160 back like a tortuous completely unable to get up. 0:13:46.880 --> 0:13:49.920 The kids pulled the siren from Tim. Tron five thousand's 0:13:49.960 --> 0:13:53.240 head roughed him up a bit. Did you report it? 0:13:54.200 --> 0:13:58.240 Yeah, we got the police and they sort of just said, well, 0:13:59.440 --> 0:14:00.439 I mean, what do you. 0:14:00.400 --> 0:14:06.600 Expect with my family? It's like. 0:14:08.320 --> 0:14:11.880 It's shorthunt. Now here's Dylan again, like we just. 0:14:11.840 --> 0:14:13.800 Rule arizing and goes, oh, fucking curse. 0:14:14.600 --> 0:14:17.880 The misfortunes that you they you mention, I mean, do 0:14:17.920 --> 0:14:22.600 you literally feel like they're connected to this five hundred 0:14:22.600 --> 0:14:23.400 odd year curse. 0:14:25.120 --> 0:14:28.840 I think it's like this Jonathan in my head is like, 0:14:30.080 --> 0:14:34.840 if you've got five hundred years of people wishing you ill, 0:14:35.280 --> 0:14:37.280 it cannot be good for your soul. 0:14:38.600 --> 0:14:41.920 Dylan says that since the old archbishop of Glasgow levied 0:14:41.960 --> 0:14:45.320 the curse. The present day archbishop is the only person 0:14:45.400 --> 0:14:48.280 with the power to lift it. Others have made appeals 0:14:48.280 --> 0:14:50.280 to him, but he's never responded. 0:14:50.680 --> 0:14:52.840 What I love is the curse to be lifted. We 0:14:52.880 --> 0:14:54.680 will do anything to lift this curse. 0:14:55.280 --> 0:14:58.720 And so Dylan has come to me for help. They 0:14:58.760 --> 0:15:01.280 did notice that there were something in the curse about 0:15:01.320 --> 0:15:04.840 anybody who helps you, I think their curse too. 0:15:04.960 --> 0:15:07.880 It's any Christian man. All Christian men who speak to 0:15:07.880 --> 0:15:11.280 me are cursed by proxy. I think being Jewish, you're 0:15:11.280 --> 0:15:12.320 actually excused. 0:15:12.520 --> 0:15:14.680 Oh, because I am not Christian. It gives me a 0:15:14.760 --> 0:15:17.640 leg up, I think. So, yeah, is that the loophole here? 0:15:17.720 --> 0:15:20.200 Is that why you came to me. It wasn't because 0:15:20.240 --> 0:15:23.360 of my previous good works. It was just because I'm 0:15:23.360 --> 0:15:27.200 a jew, which brings us back to his email about 0:15:27.240 --> 0:15:30.200 how lifting the curse would be the biggest heavyweight yet, 0:15:31.000 --> 0:15:34.160 because the curse isn't limited to just the Elliots, it 0:15:34.280 --> 0:15:36.160 encompasses all the reaper families. 0:15:36.880 --> 0:15:38.920 I mean, there's three hundred thousand elliots in the world. 0:15:40.200 --> 0:15:48.320 How many Armstrongs and Scot's and Nixon's and Dixon's and Springles. 0:15:49.240 --> 0:15:52.520 Not to sound like one of those CD personal injury lawyers. 0:15:52.800 --> 0:15:56.440 But if your name is Scott or Douglas, Reed or Robson, 0:15:56.800 --> 0:16:00.680 Nixon or Dixon, you may be entitled to karmik compensation. 0:16:01.200 --> 0:16:03.160 I'm trying to find the exceptions to the rules, you 0:16:03.240 --> 0:16:05.360 know what I mean. Like you mentioned pringles, Like, well, 0:16:05.440 --> 0:16:08.440 you know they had those canisters of chips, so they 0:16:08.440 --> 0:16:09.040 probably did. 0:16:09.040 --> 0:16:12.000 Okay, can tell me you've had the pocket fringles not 0:16:12.080 --> 0:16:13.400 fell a little bit cursed afterwards? 0:16:14.440 --> 0:16:17.800 Well put, Dylan and his brothers are tired of their 0:16:17.840 --> 0:16:21.560 mouth ulcers and tooth holes, tired of wearing eye patches 0:16:21.600 --> 0:16:25.200 and getting beaten up by children. They're ready to live 0:16:25.360 --> 0:16:30.200 their best lives. If we got this lifted, what would 0:16:30.200 --> 0:16:32.840 the ensuing days look like? If you had to speculate 0:16:33.840 --> 0:16:34.240 for me. 0:16:35.440 --> 0:16:38.160 It'd probably be getting funding. 0:16:38.160 --> 0:16:39.040 To do your PhD. 0:16:39.880 --> 0:16:44.360 Yes, Well, when I'm be able to grow cabbages because 0:16:44.400 --> 0:16:46.560 I actually love cabbage, I don't know. I would just 0:16:46.600 --> 0:16:47.560 love to be able to grow. 0:16:47.360 --> 0:16:52.360 Cabbages, Okay, cabbages and what else? 0:16:52.720 --> 0:16:58.240 Yeah, mainly the cabbages, Like I really, I really love cabbages. 0:16:58.320 --> 0:17:02.200 It's like a stir fry soup. But I don't know. Yeah, 0:17:02.880 --> 0:17:03.720 most the cabbages. 0:17:07.960 --> 0:17:09.679 We're gonna get you, Elliotts turned around. 0:17:11.680 --> 0:17:13.000 We're gonna good to hear it. 0:17:13.119 --> 0:17:24.200 Erase the chalkboard, a fresh news start. The curse still 0:17:24.200 --> 0:17:27.200 in red to me, and it's dizzying entirety comes from 0:17:27.200 --> 0:17:30.960 the Elliot Clan Society website. It turns out there's a 0:17:30.960 --> 0:17:35.280 whole organization of descendants of Border Reavers named Elliott. The 0:17:35.320 --> 0:17:38.399 site contains a history of the Elliott family, a map 0:17:38.440 --> 0:17:42.080 of Elliott Territory, and a list of famous Elliots like 0:17:42.160 --> 0:17:45.159 Ts Eliott, the poet who dared not eat a peach, 0:17:45.640 --> 0:17:49.760 and Sam Elliott, the push broom mustachioed actor who safe 0:17:49.760 --> 0:17:54.399 to say, should probably also stay away from peaches. And 0:17:54.440 --> 0:17:57.199 then there's the page with the transcript of the curse. 0:17:57.960 --> 0:18:01.800 Underneath it there are rems and realms of comments. Stephen 0:18:01.880 --> 0:18:04.720 Kyle Elliott posts that he's the only member of his 0:18:04.800 --> 0:18:08.320 family in four generations that hasn't been to prison or 0:18:08.400 --> 0:18:11.840 had problems with drugs. I try to do right and 0:18:11.840 --> 0:18:14.159 be a good person, but I always seem to have 0:18:14.200 --> 0:18:18.720 the most bad luck possible, he says. Mary Elliott cites cancer, 0:18:18.960 --> 0:18:22.960 airplane crashes and fires. Long before I ever heard of 0:18:23.000 --> 0:18:25.119 this curse. I felt a curse had been put on 0:18:25.160 --> 0:18:29.639 our family, she writes, Believe me, the curse is alive 0:18:29.720 --> 0:18:43.919 and well. Hello, Hello, Is this Margaret Elliott? Yes, it 0:18:44.040 --> 0:18:48.280 is Margaret Elliott is the chief of the Elliott Clan society. 0:18:48.760 --> 0:18:52.440 This is Jonathan Goldstein calling from the American podcast. 0:18:52.920 --> 0:18:54.000 I'm marri Heartrising. 0:18:55.080 --> 0:18:57.440 It is my held belief that setting off on a 0:18:57.520 --> 0:19:00.399 quest to lift a five hundred year old clan hers 0:19:00.720 --> 0:19:05.320 requires the blessing of a clan Chieftainess. Margaret Elliot sounds 0:19:05.359 --> 0:19:07.480 like someone who owns at least a dozen and a 0:19:07.520 --> 0:19:10.520 half Welsh Corgies, and like real nobility. 0:19:10.840 --> 0:19:11.280 She says. 0:19:11.280 --> 0:19:14.040 She inherited the role from her father, who was chief 0:19:14.119 --> 0:19:17.520 before her. With the title, does there come a dwelling 0:19:17.880 --> 0:19:20.240 like the way the President of the United States gets 0:19:20.280 --> 0:19:23.159 to live in the White House? No, I'm fortunately not 0:19:24.400 --> 0:19:27.679 to begin. Margaret proudly shares some fun facts about the 0:19:27.720 --> 0:19:28.560 Elliott family. 0:19:29.200 --> 0:19:33.400 The Canadian Prime Minister was an Elliot. His middle name 0:19:33.480 --> 0:19:35.000 was Pierre Elliott Trudeau. 0:19:35.400 --> 0:19:39.240 Pierre Elliott Trudeau traced his lineage back to the Elliot clan. 0:19:39.320 --> 0:19:44.320 I didn't know that, Yes she did. Yeah, my middle 0:19:44.359 --> 0:19:58.000 name is Stuart it is. When I get down to 0:19:58.080 --> 0:20:01.320 explaining my mission, Margaret tells she's known about the curse 0:20:01.359 --> 0:20:04.639 her whole life. It's a part of Elliott history. But 0:20:04.720 --> 0:20:06.199 at the same time, I. 0:20:06.320 --> 0:20:09.479 Don't pay this any attention at all. Yeah, I mean, 0:20:09.520 --> 0:20:12.040 this is the first time I've ever actually talked about it. 0:20:12.880 --> 0:20:15.480 I've never thought it was remotely important. 0:20:16.440 --> 0:20:19.720 It's important to her constituents, though. I tell her about 0:20:19.800 --> 0:20:24.119 Dylan and his brothers, the eye patches, the constant muggings, 0:20:24.160 --> 0:20:28.720 the cabbage problems. 0:20:27.520 --> 0:20:31.520 Which I don't think he can plain it. I think 0:20:31.560 --> 0:20:35.320 maybe he's got the wrong sort of grand for cabbage. 0:20:35.560 --> 0:20:45.080 Yeah, the cursed kind. Although Margaret doesn't put stock in curses, 0:20:45.400 --> 0:20:48.359 she still blesses the mission and even offers to help. 0:20:48.760 --> 0:20:49.359 Well, I mean, I. 0:20:49.800 --> 0:20:52.960 Could probably get the archbishop on the phone. 0:20:53.160 --> 0:20:56.840 Do you think you can get an archbishop on the telephone? 0:20:57.119 --> 0:20:57.480 Why not? 0:20:58.560 --> 0:21:03.159 Wow? I really appreciate your good old American moxie on 0:21:03.280 --> 0:21:03.760 that one. 0:21:05.440 --> 0:21:06.280 What does that mean? 0:21:07.720 --> 0:21:11.560 What does good old American moxie mean, Margaret? It's throwing 0:21:11.600 --> 0:21:14.200 a bottle rocket into a trash can just to see 0:21:14.240 --> 0:21:17.720 it go boom. It's staring down your enemies while picking 0:21:17.720 --> 0:21:20.960 your teeth with a corn dog stick. It's sowing a 0:21:21.000 --> 0:21:24.840 Canadian flag onto your backpack when traveling through Europe. So 0:21:24.920 --> 0:21:27.960 when you toss a bottle rocket into some Parisian poobell, 0:21:28.560 --> 0:21:32.520 Canada looks like the idiot Moxie is getting a bishop 0:21:32.560 --> 0:21:35.320 on the horn and greeting him with a big fat 0:21:35.359 --> 0:21:38.879 American howdy. Do have you ever reached out to an 0:21:38.960 --> 0:21:39.840 archbishop before? 0:21:41.119 --> 0:21:41.239 No? 0:21:41.400 --> 0:21:44.080 I know Bishop wil too, but no I don't have. 0:21:45.160 --> 0:21:46.000 It'd be interesting. 0:21:47.040 --> 0:21:49.280 I will follow it up. You've inspired me. 0:21:50.600 --> 0:21:53.800 Wow, Okay, that isn't often what I do, So I 0:21:53.840 --> 0:21:54.560 appreciate that. 0:21:55.160 --> 0:21:55.600 Very good. 0:21:57.000 --> 0:22:00.680 Margaret is on the case. But before getting off the phone, 0:22:00.920 --> 0:22:03.720 she counsels me against talking to other elliots about the 0:22:03.760 --> 0:22:08.160 curse if they're blissfully unaware. She says, why share something 0:22:08.240 --> 0:22:12.160 that will only trouble them. To illustrate her point, Margaret 0:22:12.160 --> 0:22:16.520 tells me about an art installation memorializing the curse. It's 0:22:16.520 --> 0:22:20.000 called the Cursing Stone, and it's a fourteen ton granite 0:22:20.000 --> 0:22:23.560 boulder with the curse inscribed upon it. It was commissioned 0:22:23.560 --> 0:22:25.840 by the City of Carlisle in two thousand and one. 0:22:26.760 --> 0:22:32.439 Tasa was fairly unwise. Why why they believe in this curse, 0:22:32.880 --> 0:22:35.679 but there are people who do, like your friend Dylan, 0:22:36.560 --> 0:22:39.160 and I think it is unwise to bring it out 0:22:39.240 --> 0:22:41.600 again because it alarms people. 0:22:42.520 --> 0:22:45.600 But the follout caused by the stone suggests it more 0:22:45.640 --> 0:22:50.000 than alarmed people. Following its installation, the city experienced the 0:22:50.119 --> 0:22:53.800 series of disasters, the worst flood in two hundred years, 0:22:54.200 --> 0:22:57.840 an outbreak of foot and mouth disease, numerous businesses and 0:22:57.920 --> 0:23:02.000 factories shutting down, among them notably a bar called the 0:23:02.040 --> 0:23:06.800