1 00:00:07,520 --> 00:00:12,440 Speaker 1: Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour, Susan. We're back. 2 00:00:12,640 --> 00:00:14,040 Speaker 1: Thank y'all for joining us. 3 00:00:14,520 --> 00:00:17,520 Speaker 2: So you guys, if you haven't listened to our Wednesday 4 00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:21,960 Speaker 2: episode yet, you are definitely missing out. We had Lexi 5 00:00:22,280 --> 00:00:25,959 Speaker 2: from Joey season and Kathy how about her being a blonde? 6 00:00:26,040 --> 00:00:29,400 Speaker 3: How beautiful? I mean she was beautiful on his season. 7 00:00:29,440 --> 00:00:31,560 Speaker 3: Now she's like what. 8 00:00:32,159 --> 00:00:36,360 Speaker 1: So okay, Yes, she's absolutely beautiful, Susan, And she's a 9 00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:38,680 Speaker 1: beautiful as a blonde who was beautiful as a brunette. 10 00:00:38,680 --> 00:00:41,840 Speaker 1: But you know what impressed me about her her willingness 11 00:00:41,840 --> 00:00:46,280 Speaker 1: to talk about her endometriosis and freezing her eggs and 12 00:00:46,360 --> 00:00:50,200 Speaker 1: searching for the right guy, and just knowing that she's 13 00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:54,960 Speaker 1: complete as I just found her amazingly mature and Lexi, 14 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:57,840 Speaker 1: if you're listening to us today, get over the twenty 15 00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:00,360 Speaker 1: six year old guys start looking for a guy little 16 00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:03,800 Speaker 1: bit older because they're not they're ready for it. 17 00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:07,959 Speaker 2: I love seeing she was very comfortable in her own skin. 18 00:01:08,160 --> 00:01:12,000 Speaker 2: She knows what she wants and she does want. And 19 00:01:12,400 --> 00:01:14,680 Speaker 2: how about her freezing her eggs, like she's shared, that's 20 00:01:14,680 --> 00:01:17,720 Speaker 2: a great thing to do, especially with her situation. But 21 00:01:17,760 --> 00:01:20,360 Speaker 2: she's not afraid to talk about it. I think she 22 00:01:20,520 --> 00:01:24,000 Speaker 2: shared with us that Joey helped her, you know what. 23 00:01:24,040 --> 00:01:24,960 Speaker 3: I love that way. 24 00:01:25,600 --> 00:01:28,080 Speaker 1: One of the things I love about doing this podcast 25 00:01:28,480 --> 00:01:32,440 Speaker 1: is Lexi's not alone. There are a lot of women 26 00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:36,119 Speaker 1: of child bearing years who are dealing exactly with what 27 00:01:36,160 --> 00:01:39,360 Speaker 1: she's dealing with. And to normalize it and talk about 28 00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:41,640 Speaker 1: it and know that you're not alone. I just I 29 00:01:41,720 --> 00:01:44,360 Speaker 1: love that she can stand for that and people can say, 30 00:01:44,560 --> 00:01:47,520 Speaker 1: if she can do it and get through the surgeries 31 00:01:47,560 --> 00:01:50,840 Speaker 1: and have this positive out, positive outlook, you know I 32 00:01:50,840 --> 00:01:51,320 Speaker 1: can do it. 33 00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:54,480 Speaker 2: I love that, Kathy, did it ever occur to you? 34 00:01:54,560 --> 00:01:57,920 Speaker 2: As it is right now in my brain that the 35 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:04,680 Speaker 2: show itself helps people to grow and find themselves and 36 00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:09,000 Speaker 2: realize who they are when I share with you, when 37 00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:12,200 Speaker 2: I came off the show, I knew I love myself, 38 00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:13,359 Speaker 2: I'm good people. 39 00:02:13,440 --> 00:02:15,480 Speaker 3: And I believe she's come. 40 00:02:15,360 --> 00:02:19,720 Speaker 2: So much further To hear her talk, and. 41 00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:23,280 Speaker 1: I think she said she's had a lot of seasons. 42 00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:26,760 Speaker 1: I think being on the show If you Will is 43 00:02:26,800 --> 00:02:29,480 Speaker 1: a season, and it changed me. We've talked about it 44 00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:32,760 Speaker 1: many times. It's changed you. But I just think that 45 00:02:33,960 --> 00:02:37,880 Speaker 1: hearing I think sometimes people feel very isolated, right, and 46 00:02:37,919 --> 00:02:40,320 Speaker 1: they feel like they're the only ones dealing with something 47 00:02:40,720 --> 00:02:44,160 Speaker 1: and to hear what she's dealing with and people hearing 48 00:02:44,240 --> 00:02:46,239 Speaker 1: what you and I've dealt with. So that's what I love. 49 00:02:46,400 --> 00:02:48,760 Speaker 1: I love that we can talk about these things and 50 00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:50,240 Speaker 1: people can know they're not alone. 51 00:02:50,760 --> 00:02:52,040 Speaker 3: So that's absolutely mean. 52 00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:55,680 Speaker 1: Okay, well today we're proud of you, Lexi, we are, 53 00:02:55,760 --> 00:02:59,239 Speaker 1: and please could we look like her? Can we go 54 00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:01,920 Speaker 1: back and look like in my next life? 55 00:03:02,560 --> 00:03:05,040 Speaker 3: I never try blonde. Maybe I should have tried blonde. 56 00:03:05,040 --> 00:03:08,360 Speaker 1: No, blonde is not in my future, absolutely not. Okay, 57 00:03:08,560 --> 00:03:11,600 Speaker 1: Today though, we're going to answer, which we love, more 58 00:03:11,639 --> 00:03:14,000 Speaker 1: of your fan questions and we are so excited to 59 00:03:14,040 --> 00:03:16,680 Speaker 1: get into these because Susan and I have opinions about 60 00:03:16,880 --> 00:03:17,760 Speaker 1: just about everything. 61 00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:21,800 Speaker 2: And don't forget if you guys have a question for 62 00:03:21,960 --> 00:03:25,440 Speaker 2: Kathy and me, send them in. Just go to Bachelornation 63 00:03:25,720 --> 00:03:30,080 Speaker 2: dot com slash Golden Hour and we will read every 64 00:03:30,120 --> 00:03:32,640 Speaker 2: one of them and maybe you'll even be a guest 65 00:03:32,720 --> 00:03:33,079 Speaker 2: on here. 66 00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:37,480 Speaker 1: Okay, And before we get to that, we always start 67 00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:40,080 Speaker 1: with our question of the day. Are you ready, Susan? 68 00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:46,120 Speaker 1: All right, now, under what circumstances do you think a 69 00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:50,440 Speaker 1: ten year age gap in a relationship can work. 70 00:03:53,560 --> 00:03:56,400 Speaker 2: The first thing that comes to mind is you have 71 00:03:56,480 --> 00:04:01,400 Speaker 2: to be over thirty or yeah, nothing less than thirty. 72 00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:05,320 Speaker 2: It would never it's too young. Forty fifty. Well, my 73 00:04:05,440 --> 00:04:08,800 Speaker 2: age ten years is just perfectly fond. Yeah, I agree 74 00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:11,480 Speaker 2: with that on either way, older or younger. 75 00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:14,640 Speaker 1: Do you know what came to my mind? What my 76 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:18,440 Speaker 1: son who you officiated their wedding? Who married a woman 77 00:04:18,560 --> 00:04:19,080 Speaker 1: ten years? 78 00:04:19,360 --> 00:04:20,520 Speaker 3: Ten years senor? 79 00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:24,320 Speaker 1: I think you're old. She's a lucky girl, a lucky girl. 80 00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:26,560 Speaker 1: I think you're onto something, though, Susan. I think if 81 00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:32,120 Speaker 1: you're too young, it doesn't work. And if you're too old, maybe, 82 00:04:32,200 --> 00:04:35,520 Speaker 1: you know, then maybe things happen in that it's hard to, 83 00:04:36,120 --> 00:04:38,640 Speaker 1: you know, deal with someone who maybe is not as mobile. 84 00:04:39,080 --> 00:04:42,039 Speaker 1: But I think you're right that those middle years ten 85 00:04:42,120 --> 00:04:43,559 Speaker 1: years just doesn't mean much. 86 00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:47,039 Speaker 2: I mean, I remember when I was just starting to 87 00:04:47,160 --> 00:04:50,159 Speaker 2: date late teens, and my mother would never let me 88 00:04:50,200 --> 00:04:52,680 Speaker 2: go out with a guy five years older. When you're 89 00:04:52,839 --> 00:04:57,920 Speaker 2: nineteen and he's twenty six or twenty four whatever, that's ridiculous. 90 00:04:57,920 --> 00:05:01,159 Speaker 2: So ten years at that age is a lot, I think. 91 00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:04,880 Speaker 2: But once you're thirty five, especially forty, you could do 92 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:06,800 Speaker 2: fifty again, It's like. 93 00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:09,760 Speaker 1: It's like child bearing, right, so you know, if you're 94 00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:11,720 Speaker 1: a thirty five date and a forty five year old 95 00:05:11,800 --> 00:05:13,720 Speaker 1: and you don't have kids, you might have kids. I mean, 96 00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:16,560 Speaker 1: it just depends on the person. I think as well, 97 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:20,120 Speaker 1: but I think it can work. I'm certainly hoping so 98 00:05:20,200 --> 00:05:26,279 Speaker 1: since my son has married that one. OKAYO me too? 99 00:05:28,440 --> 00:05:30,039 Speaker 1: Are you ready to answer some questions? Go? 100 00:05:30,400 --> 00:05:32,680 Speaker 3: Oh, I think we should? You could go first? Or 101 00:05:32,800 --> 00:05:34,320 Speaker 3: number one? 102 00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:41,120 Speaker 1: Okay, Kylie asked Hi, Kathy and Susan. I drive an 103 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:44,600 Speaker 1: hour to work and listening to you two times a 104 00:05:44,680 --> 00:05:48,400 Speaker 1: week makes my drive so much better. Well, we're glad, Kylie. 105 00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:51,200 Speaker 1: I am a mom. It's great, you know. Just keep 106 00:05:51,200 --> 00:05:53,919 Speaker 1: your hands on the standing wheel. Okay. I'm a mom 107 00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:57,679 Speaker 1: of an almost two year old and a nine week old. Lately, 108 00:05:57,960 --> 00:06:01,200 Speaker 1: I've been having terrible mom guilt for losing my patience 109 00:06:01,279 --> 00:06:03,960 Speaker 1: with my two year old throughout the day and not 110 00:06:04,120 --> 00:06:07,279 Speaker 1: spending enough one on one time with my newborn. I 111 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:11,640 Speaker 1: go to bed feeling so guilty and quite honestly overwhelmed. 112 00:06:12,120 --> 00:06:15,120 Speaker 1: How do you work through that mom guilt? How did 113 00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:17,440 Speaker 1: you make sure each of your kids was getting that 114 00:06:17,480 --> 00:06:21,680 Speaker 1: one on one time with you, much love and thank you. 115 00:06:21,680 --> 00:06:26,960 Speaker 3: You're totally normal. I mean we all felt that way. 116 00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:27,960 Speaker 3: You do. 117 00:06:28,000 --> 00:06:31,719 Speaker 2: Your patients run things sometimes and you do snap, but 118 00:06:32,279 --> 00:06:34,400 Speaker 2: you love them up afterwards, right. 119 00:06:35,240 --> 00:06:40,479 Speaker 1: I mean, listen, it is the oldest myth out there 120 00:06:41,160 --> 00:06:44,640 Speaker 1: that moms can do at all, have a full time job, 121 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:47,839 Speaker 1: raise their kids. You know, the old Betty Crocker with 122 00:06:47,880 --> 00:06:50,480 Speaker 1: an apron and making homemade cakes every day. 123 00:06:50,520 --> 00:06:53,040 Speaker 3: It's not the way anymore. Everybody works, Susan. 124 00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:55,960 Speaker 1: It was never the way. So what I would say 125 00:06:55,960 --> 00:06:59,440 Speaker 1: to you, Kylie, is you know what, We're not perfect. 126 00:07:00,400 --> 00:07:04,000 Speaker 1: I think the most important thing is making sure your 127 00:07:04,120 --> 00:07:07,200 Speaker 1: kids know you love them. I had three I still 128 00:07:07,240 --> 00:07:10,840 Speaker 1: do have three children, and when they were young, I 129 00:07:10,880 --> 00:07:11,720 Speaker 1: would try. 130 00:07:11,480 --> 00:07:14,280 Speaker 3: To take one one one, one on one. 131 00:07:14,160 --> 00:07:16,320 Speaker 1: And take them to a special thing, like take my 132 00:07:16,480 --> 00:07:20,320 Speaker 1: daughter to the Nutcracker ballet at Christmas time, take my 133 00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:22,480 Speaker 1: son to a baseball game, take. 134 00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:26,440 Speaker 2: Going to McDonald's for But when they're young, though, the 135 00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:29,480 Speaker 2: other ones will cry. I mean there's a certain age 136 00:07:29,520 --> 00:07:32,440 Speaker 2: where you real young is good. They don't know the difference, 137 00:07:32,480 --> 00:07:35,600 Speaker 2: but as they get older you explain it to them. 138 00:07:35,640 --> 00:07:39,160 Speaker 2: Then your day is Tuesday, or your day is Sunday. 139 00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:42,360 Speaker 2: Mommy loves all of you, right, And I do think 140 00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:43,360 Speaker 2: you're totally normal. 141 00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:46,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's totally normal. You shouldn't have guilt. There's enough 142 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:50,840 Speaker 1: guilt in life. Don't add to it. Don't add to it, Kylie. 143 00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:51,520 Speaker 3: Just just go easy. 144 00:07:51,640 --> 00:07:54,760 Speaker 1: And you're saying, you know what, give yourself the grace 145 00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:58,120 Speaker 1: of knowing that you're a busy mom and you've got 146 00:07:58,160 --> 00:08:00,560 Speaker 1: a lot on your plate. And at the end of 147 00:08:00,600 --> 00:08:03,840 Speaker 1: the day, your kids know that you love them and 148 00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:06,880 Speaker 1: that's really all that matters. The rest of them were. 149 00:08:06,760 --> 00:08:09,040 Speaker 2: Do a daddy day and a mommy day. You know, 150 00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:11,160 Speaker 2: one goes with one, one goes with the other. 151 00:08:11,880 --> 00:08:14,239 Speaker 1: There might not be a daddy, there might be two mommies. 152 00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:17,520 Speaker 1: Who knows. I'm just saying. I'm just saying, your kids 153 00:08:17,600 --> 00:08:19,920 Speaker 1: really at the end of the day, my kids. I 154 00:08:19,920 --> 00:08:23,320 Speaker 1: don't know about your Susan, but my kids don't remember 155 00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:26,360 Speaker 1: the you know, the gift that I got them for Christmas. 156 00:08:26,400 --> 00:08:29,520 Speaker 1: They don't remember the things that they got. They always 157 00:08:29,560 --> 00:08:33,040 Speaker 1: talk about the experiences that we had, either one on 158 00:08:33,040 --> 00:08:36,240 Speaker 1: one or as a family. So Kylie, give your kids 159 00:08:36,280 --> 00:08:39,400 Speaker 1: the experiences. It doesn't have to be all day. Just 160 00:08:39,440 --> 00:08:42,240 Speaker 1: spend some one on one time with them, and it's 161 00:08:42,280 --> 00:08:45,559 Speaker 1: going to go. It's they're going to always remember that, always. 162 00:08:45,280 --> 00:08:47,920 Speaker 2: Mine, remember how I made them laugh and made them 163 00:08:47,960 --> 00:08:48,920 Speaker 2: embarrassed and. 164 00:08:50,559 --> 00:08:52,920 Speaker 3: We had some good times. But they do remember some 165 00:08:52,960 --> 00:08:53,920 Speaker 3: of the special gifts. 166 00:08:54,320 --> 00:08:57,679 Speaker 1: And by the way, when Joey says she's overwhelmed, Kylie, 167 00:08:57,880 --> 00:09:01,599 Speaker 1: welcome to motherhood. Motherhood, Yeah, call us write us in 168 00:09:01,679 --> 00:09:04,480 Speaker 1: about Oh, let's call it eighteen years and you're going 169 00:09:04,520 --> 00:09:05,760 Speaker 1: to feel a whole lot better. 170 00:09:06,280 --> 00:09:09,520 Speaker 2: You're doing fine, sweetheart, but thank you for sharing it 171 00:09:09,559 --> 00:09:21,600 Speaker 2: with us, and we wish you the best. Okay, this 172 00:09:21,640 --> 00:09:26,920 Speaker 2: one's from an anonymous they say, love your show, ladies. 173 00:09:26,960 --> 00:09:29,560 Speaker 2: A few years ago, we had a set of friends, 174 00:09:29,880 --> 00:09:33,360 Speaker 2: Doug and Mary, who asked us to introduce them to 175 00:09:33,440 --> 00:09:38,439 Speaker 2: another set of friends, Kendra and Gary. Kendra and get Gary. 176 00:09:38,559 --> 00:09:41,000 Speaker 2: That's first time my starh right, sounds. 177 00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:44,520 Speaker 1: Like Barby Jerry. It could be Gary or Jerry. It's Gary. 178 00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:49,520 Speaker 2: Kendra and Gary owned vacation properties and Doug and Mary 179 00:09:49,679 --> 00:09:54,480 Speaker 2: mentioned wanting to be invited there. Okay, my husband and 180 00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:58,480 Speaker 2: I thought it would be fun, so I introduced the couples. 181 00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:04,000 Speaker 2: After many of an event, including travel together. Mary took 182 00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:08,160 Speaker 2: it up upon herself. Uh oh, to hold a retirement 183 00:10:08,280 --> 00:10:12,320 Speaker 2: party for Kendra, knowing we could not attend on the 184 00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:18,160 Speaker 2: proposed weekend out. We were rightfully upset, as we feel 185 00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:22,400 Speaker 2: it was done on purpose. Now the two couples get together, 186 00:10:22,559 --> 00:10:27,760 Speaker 2: including vacations, and leave us out. We have some relation 187 00:10:28,080 --> 00:10:32,319 Speaker 2: with Kendra and Gary, but have not spoken to Mary 188 00:10:32,400 --> 00:10:35,520 Speaker 2: or Doug, other than Doug reaching out to my husband 189 00:10:35,559 --> 00:10:39,120 Speaker 2: to wish him to marry Christmas. Are we being too 190 00:10:39,200 --> 00:10:43,800 Speaker 2: sensitive or are we justified in limited contact? 191 00:10:44,320 --> 00:10:50,960 Speaker 3: Would love your insight. Ah, wow, what do you think? Yeah? 192 00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:54,600 Speaker 2: I feel bad for them, but you know what I say, 193 00:10:54,679 --> 00:10:57,040 Speaker 2: those the other four just have more fun. 194 00:10:57,320 --> 00:11:01,160 Speaker 1: It's you know, there's a lot going on here. But 195 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:03,319 Speaker 1: at the end of it was sting me, Kathy, what 196 00:11:04,360 --> 00:11:08,080 Speaker 1: this happened to me? This Jesus it did? It wasn't 197 00:11:08,160 --> 00:11:12,040 Speaker 1: It wasn't a couples. It was a girlfriend of mine 198 00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:14,480 Speaker 1: and I get all the time, and I introduced her 199 00:11:14,520 --> 00:11:17,520 Speaker 1: to another friend of mine and they kind of went 200 00:11:17,559 --> 00:11:20,199 Speaker 1: off and literally left me out and would say we're 201 00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:22,520 Speaker 1: doing this, We're doing that. Do you know that? Like 202 00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:26,160 Speaker 1: ten years later, one of those girls called me and 203 00:11:26,240 --> 00:11:29,120 Speaker 1: apologized and said it was hateful. What we did you 204 00:11:29,160 --> 00:11:31,720 Speaker 1: were such a nice person. I'm really sorry we did 205 00:11:31,720 --> 00:11:33,600 Speaker 1: that too. And my answer was so with. 206 00:11:33,520 --> 00:11:33,959 Speaker 3: That the way. 207 00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:38,880 Speaker 2: With that being said, her calling to apologize tells me 208 00:11:39,200 --> 00:11:40,400 Speaker 2: they knew what they were doing. 209 00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:43,680 Speaker 1: Yes, and you know what so mean? Well, but you 210 00:11:43,720 --> 00:11:46,959 Speaker 1: know what I would say to the in this situation, 211 00:11:47,160 --> 00:11:50,199 Speaker 1: It was mean. But you know what not every friendship 212 00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:53,760 Speaker 1: or relationship is meant for a lifetime. And the fact is, 213 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:58,200 Speaker 1: are you being too sensitive? What's too sensitive? Your feelings 214 00:11:58,240 --> 00:11:58,880 Speaker 1: have been heard? 215 00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:02,160 Speaker 2: They missing out too, They don't get to go anymore. 216 00:12:02,200 --> 00:12:03,680 Speaker 2: They're doing it without that right. 217 00:12:03,840 --> 00:12:07,560 Speaker 1: So are you justified in limited contact? You're justified in 218 00:12:07,640 --> 00:12:11,199 Speaker 1: doing whatever makes you feel comfortable in your friend group. 219 00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:14,640 Speaker 3: And so when you're justified to feel what you feel. 220 00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:16,680 Speaker 1: Right, and if you want to get together with them, 221 00:12:17,040 --> 00:12:19,640 Speaker 1: get together with them, invite them over. But you know 222 00:12:19,679 --> 00:12:24,760 Speaker 1: what it sounds to me, guys like anymous anonymous, It 223 00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:28,400 Speaker 1: sounds like you're upset and you don't really want to 224 00:12:28,440 --> 00:12:31,439 Speaker 1: continue the friendship. So give yourself the grace of saying, 225 00:12:31,440 --> 00:12:33,960 Speaker 1: you know what, it was good for a time and 226 00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:36,000 Speaker 1: move on with your life with your other friends. 227 00:12:36,559 --> 00:12:39,240 Speaker 2: But Kathy, did you see where she said they held 228 00:12:39,240 --> 00:12:44,200 Speaker 2: a retirement party. Knowing they couldn't attend at that on 229 00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:44,839 Speaker 2: that date. 230 00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:48,200 Speaker 3: One would think if. 231 00:12:48,160 --> 00:12:50,480 Speaker 2: That were happening, oh, I would have spoke up and said, 232 00:12:50,480 --> 00:12:52,840 Speaker 2: oh my gosh, I can't make it that they please 233 00:12:52,920 --> 00:12:54,640 Speaker 2: have it a different day. 234 00:12:54,800 --> 00:12:57,960 Speaker 1: But again, as as often in when we're answering questions, 235 00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:02,199 Speaker 1: we don't know. Maybe the people were leaving on a track, 236 00:13:02,360 --> 00:13:03,720 Speaker 1: you know, we don't know. It might have been the 237 00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:06,040 Speaker 1: only week, and that it was possible. I think if 238 00:13:06,080 --> 00:13:11,360 Speaker 1: that was the only event that the retirement party, I'd say, 239 00:13:11,400 --> 00:13:13,440 Speaker 1: get over it. You know. I'm sure there might have 240 00:13:13,440 --> 00:13:18,200 Speaker 1: been a reason, but the fact that they're spending vacations 241 00:13:18,240 --> 00:13:20,280 Speaker 1: together and leaving them out, I hate. 242 00:13:20,120 --> 00:13:22,280 Speaker 3: To say it, Anonymous, and I'd be jealous. 243 00:13:22,720 --> 00:13:25,559 Speaker 1: The friendship may have may have, you know, it may 244 00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:27,760 Speaker 1: have been for a season and a reason, and and 245 00:13:27,840 --> 00:13:31,000 Speaker 1: it's over. And I would say, Anonymous, go make some 246 00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:36,440 Speaker 1: new friends and cherish the memories you had, but don't don't. 247 00:13:36,200 --> 00:13:40,359 Speaker 2: Feel And I say it does it dues sting, But 248 00:13:40,360 --> 00:13:40,959 Speaker 2: but it's. 249 00:13:40,800 --> 00:13:42,520 Speaker 1: Not, you know, are we being tas. 250 00:13:42,559 --> 00:13:44,840 Speaker 3: You have to move on to you have to move on. 251 00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:45,760 Speaker 3: But I don't want her to. 252 00:13:45,720 --> 00:13:49,000 Speaker 2: Think never to invite I mean never introduce friends again. 253 00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:50,319 Speaker 3: You know people get like that. 254 00:13:50,559 --> 00:13:52,680 Speaker 1: I'm never going to introduce to her. You're probably like 255 00:13:52,720 --> 00:13:55,600 Speaker 1: her and leads you don't worry about me, Susan, I'm 256 00:13:55,600 --> 00:13:57,440 Speaker 1: not going anywhere. I know you're not. 257 00:13:58,120 --> 00:13:58,559 Speaker 3: I love you. 258 00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:03,480 Speaker 1: I love you right. Here's the next one, Eddie Everie Wrights. 259 00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:06,720 Speaker 1: Hi there, Kathy and Susan. I want to say how 260 00:14:06,880 --> 00:14:10,800 Speaker 1: greatful I am for y'all's podcast. It truly helps me 261 00:14:10,840 --> 00:14:13,360 Speaker 1: get through the tough days. I'm a twenty three year 262 00:14:13,360 --> 00:14:16,360 Speaker 1: old military wife and a new mom. I was hoping 263 00:14:16,440 --> 00:14:19,320 Speaker 1: y'all could help me with some issues I've been having 264 00:14:19,360 --> 00:14:21,680 Speaker 1: with my mother in law. She and I had a 265 00:14:21,720 --> 00:14:25,320 Speaker 1: great relationship while my husband and I were dating and engaged, 266 00:14:25,640 --> 00:14:28,120 Speaker 1: But as soon as we got married, I noticed a 267 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:30,720 Speaker 1: little bit of change in her attitude towards me, but 268 00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:33,880 Speaker 1: nothing too crazy. But as soon as our daughter was born, 269 00:14:34,240 --> 00:14:37,400 Speaker 1: all hell broke loose. Anything I do she has to 270 00:14:37,440 --> 00:14:41,240 Speaker 1: criticize me. Sounds like my mother in law anyway. For example, 271 00:14:41,400 --> 00:14:44,920 Speaker 1: when my daughter was first born, I was exclusively breastfeeding. 272 00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:47,280 Speaker 1: She would lecture me how I need to be using 273 00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:51,320 Speaker 1: a bottle because it's better. Once my daughter started getting teeth, 274 00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:54,960 Speaker 1: I switched to pumping and bottle feeding. She then started 275 00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:57,520 Speaker 1: criticizing me for using a bottle and said that I 276 00:14:57,520 --> 00:15:00,640 Speaker 1: should only be breastfeeding. My husband is talk to her 277 00:15:00,880 --> 00:15:03,760 Speaker 1: many many times about the comments she has made towards me, 278 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:07,400 Speaker 1: but she always blows him off and continues to make comments. 279 00:15:07,880 --> 00:15:10,200 Speaker 1: My husband and I also have our daughter on a 280 00:15:10,240 --> 00:15:13,520 Speaker 1: pretty tight schedule, but with us being military, we don't 281 00:15:13,560 --> 00:15:16,400 Speaker 1: get to see family often, so when we do travel 282 00:15:16,440 --> 00:15:19,360 Speaker 1: down to see his family, we're not super strict on 283 00:15:19,400 --> 00:15:22,240 Speaker 1: her schedule since we are on such a limited amount 284 00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:25,680 Speaker 1: of time to visit, but she always manages to make 285 00:15:25,720 --> 00:15:28,920 Speaker 1: a nasty comment about her schedule. She will say things 286 00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:32,720 Speaker 1: like if you're actually a good parent, then you don't 287 00:15:32,840 --> 00:15:36,240 Speaker 1: need a schedule. Every time my husband calls her out, 288 00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:39,480 Speaker 1: she always says the same thing. I didn't mean it 289 00:15:39,640 --> 00:15:44,040 Speaker 1: like that. I'm just very honest. I'm really struggling to 290 00:15:44,080 --> 00:15:48,120 Speaker 1: have a good relationship with her. Any advice would be great. 291 00:15:48,840 --> 00:15:51,200 Speaker 3: Hey, mom, GISs my butt. 292 00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:54,840 Speaker 1: No, you're not the mother. No you're not saying that, 293 00:15:55,360 --> 00:15:59,400 Speaker 1: evy No. Can I just tell you, I honestly believe 294 00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:02,280 Speaker 1: this is my mother in law reincarnated. 295 00:16:02,720 --> 00:16:05,480 Speaker 3: I truly do, he said, that before. 296 00:16:05,720 --> 00:16:09,200 Speaker 1: I mean, I couldn't do anything right with my children. 297 00:16:09,560 --> 00:16:13,240 Speaker 3: You know what. Mother in laws can be opinionated. 298 00:16:12,600 --> 00:16:16,680 Speaker 1: Not me, I'm not, are you honestly my kids. 299 00:16:16,720 --> 00:16:18,680 Speaker 3: I take my daughter in law's side all the time. 300 00:16:18,760 --> 00:16:19,680 Speaker 3: I'm killing myself. 301 00:16:19,720 --> 00:16:21,640 Speaker 1: Yeah, I took my son in law. I'm just saying 302 00:16:21,800 --> 00:16:25,800 Speaker 1: I think that she's It's really tough because what happens 303 00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:30,400 Speaker 1: here is heavy. Your husband's in the middle. Unfortunately, he 304 00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:34,480 Speaker 1: loves his mom, I'm sure. And you're a new mom, 305 00:16:34,560 --> 00:16:36,960 Speaker 1: so you're feeling your way. Congrats by the way, on 306 00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:40,320 Speaker 1: the birth of your child. I also was a military wife. 307 00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:46,080 Speaker 1: I get it. I understand everything you're saying. I also 308 00:16:46,160 --> 00:16:49,000 Speaker 1: did not get to see family very often because of 309 00:16:49,040 --> 00:16:53,000 Speaker 1: our orders and where we were stationed. So what I 310 00:16:53,040 --> 00:16:55,960 Speaker 1: would say is be careful about putting your husband too 311 00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:59,160 Speaker 1: much in the middle. Let I do as I say, 312 00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:01,600 Speaker 1: not as I did. Let a lot of it just 313 00:17:01,920 --> 00:17:04,920 Speaker 1: wash off, just you know, teflon, Let it float off 314 00:17:04,920 --> 00:17:08,720 Speaker 1: your back because mother in law sometimes have a lot 315 00:17:08,760 --> 00:17:09,919 Speaker 1: of opinions, and. 316 00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:15,280 Speaker 4: You know what, what I have to address this, Okay, 317 00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:19,240 Speaker 4: the mother in law says, if you're actually a good parent, 318 00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:22,800 Speaker 4: then you don't need a schedule right then and there? 319 00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:26,840 Speaker 3: Wait, Mom, stop, could you say that again? 320 00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:27,200 Speaker 1: Please? 321 00:17:27,240 --> 00:17:29,879 Speaker 3: Wait? You're saying the sight in the eye, this is 322 00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:31,120 Speaker 3: the mother's I say. 323 00:17:31,040 --> 00:17:33,120 Speaker 1: Who should say? Mom? Can you say that again? Who 324 00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:34,280 Speaker 1: should question her? 325 00:17:34,920 --> 00:17:37,280 Speaker 3: The daughter in law or both of them? It doesn't matter. 326 00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:40,320 Speaker 3: Say that again, look at me and say that. How 327 00:17:40,440 --> 00:17:42,959 Speaker 3: dare you made? You bus? 328 00:17:43,160 --> 00:17:46,080 Speaker 1: Susan? This child is this young mother is twenty three 329 00:17:46,119 --> 00:17:47,399 Speaker 1: years old? Are you kidding me? 330 00:17:48,359 --> 00:17:49,879 Speaker 2: He's not going to be able to She's not going 331 00:17:49,960 --> 00:17:51,520 Speaker 2: to writ Then you know what the good news is? 332 00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:52,639 Speaker 3: You don't have to go often. 333 00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:54,560 Speaker 2: I don't know what to tell you then, because you 334 00:17:54,680 --> 00:17:57,800 Speaker 2: need to address it. I would not stand for that. 335 00:17:57,800 --> 00:18:01,399 Speaker 2: That would cause problems between me and my husband because 336 00:18:01,440 --> 00:18:02,480 Speaker 2: I would complain to him. 337 00:18:02,600 --> 00:18:05,280 Speaker 1: It did cause such a Yes I did, That's what 338 00:18:05,320 --> 00:18:09,040 Speaker 1: I'm saying heavy. It did cause problems with my husband 339 00:18:09,080 --> 00:18:10,960 Speaker 1: and myself. So what I would encourage you to do 340 00:18:11,560 --> 00:18:15,480 Speaker 1: is smile sweetly at her. Count to one thousand, Have 341 00:18:15,560 --> 00:18:20,000 Speaker 1: your suitcase to leave exactly, Have your suitcase packed every night, 342 00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:22,960 Speaker 1: cross a day off the calendar till you leave. It's 343 00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:25,440 Speaker 1: just what it's going to be. And thank your lucky 344 00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:29,160 Speaker 1: stars you don't live next door to her or good 345 00:18:29,240 --> 00:18:32,199 Speaker 1: luck sweet and you know what calls her on it? 346 00:18:32,440 --> 00:18:36,879 Speaker 2: Yeah, Susan calls her on it at twenty at nineteen, 347 00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:40,159 Speaker 2: I don't care how old you are, with respect of course, 348 00:18:40,880 --> 00:18:43,399 Speaker 2: with absolute respect, and maybe share with her. 349 00:18:43,720 --> 00:18:45,439 Speaker 3: Do you know how bad that hurts my feeling? 350 00:18:45,560 --> 00:18:45,760 Speaker 1: Oh? 351 00:18:45,880 --> 00:18:46,960 Speaker 3: I didn't mean it like that. 352 00:18:47,320 --> 00:18:50,600 Speaker 2: Well, this is how I received it, and maybe, just 353 00:18:50,720 --> 00:18:51,720 Speaker 2: maybe she'll get it. 354 00:18:52,560 --> 00:18:55,000 Speaker 3: But you know, some dogs you can't teach me. 355 00:18:55,240 --> 00:18:57,840 Speaker 1: Well, especially this woman is not you know, this woman's 356 00:18:57,880 --> 00:19:01,159 Speaker 1: an older mom, but heavy. Thank you and your husband 357 00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:04,120 Speaker 1: for your military service. We do appreciate that, and good 358 00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:06,000 Speaker 1: luck to you and congrats on your child. 359 00:19:07,160 --> 00:19:09,120 Speaker 2: Yes, and thanks for sharing it with us. And if 360 00:19:09,119 --> 00:19:11,159 Speaker 2: we could be of any more help, just let us know. 361 00:19:20,840 --> 00:19:24,879 Speaker 2: The next one's from Sophie. Hi, Kathy and Susan. I 362 00:19:24,920 --> 00:19:27,600 Speaker 2: am such a big fan of your podcast. I had 363 00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:30,679 Speaker 2: a question for you guys, and my family and friends 364 00:19:30,760 --> 00:19:35,679 Speaker 2: have so many opinions about this. Okay, my boyfriend of 365 00:19:35,720 --> 00:19:39,400 Speaker 2: two years we are in our senior year of college, 366 00:19:39,440 --> 00:19:42,680 Speaker 2: makes three thousand dollars a week, while I make six 367 00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:47,440 Speaker 2: hundred dollars a week. Due to my major. I am 368 00:19:47,480 --> 00:19:51,720 Speaker 2: an unpaid intern and I need an internship for my 369 00:19:51,880 --> 00:19:56,159 Speaker 2: credits to graduate this spring. Anyways, at the bar and 370 00:19:56,240 --> 00:19:59,280 Speaker 2: many other things. He will never pay for me ever, 371 00:20:00,160 --> 00:20:03,840 Speaker 2: unless I laugh about it and say are you paying 372 00:20:04,119 --> 00:20:09,359 Speaker 2: ha haha, and he gets mad and I pay. I 373 00:20:09,440 --> 00:20:13,520 Speaker 2: do feel bad because I do want to pay for myself, 374 00:20:13,840 --> 00:20:17,960 Speaker 2: but I am paying for rent, gas and groceries while 375 00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:21,479 Speaker 2: his parents pay for everything for him, and he is 376 00:20:21,640 --> 00:20:24,160 Speaker 2: living in my house rent free. 377 00:20:24,320 --> 00:20:27,520 Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Susan. Could you just repeat that he's living. 378 00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:31,840 Speaker 2: What he's living in her house rent free? Everyone her 379 00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:35,560 Speaker 2: been dating. We have been dating for almost three years now, 380 00:20:36,240 --> 00:20:39,760 Speaker 2: and it has always been this way. It's to the 381 00:20:39,840 --> 00:20:43,000 Speaker 2: point where my cousin will buy me drinks at the 382 00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:46,480 Speaker 2: bar and so will my friends, while my boyfriend will 383 00:20:46,520 --> 00:20:50,600 Speaker 2: pay for his friend's drinks at the bar but not mine. 384 00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:52,560 Speaker 3: Am I doing something wrong? 385 00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:53,360 Speaker 1: Yes? You are? 386 00:20:53,760 --> 00:20:57,400 Speaker 3: I need advice. Please help, Oh, Sophie, take. 387 00:20:57,280 --> 00:21:00,040 Speaker 1: Him to the first I was gonna say, Sophie, that 388 00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:02,920 Speaker 1: apartment or home that you're living in and he's living 389 00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:06,679 Speaker 1: rent free, Show him the door and say see you 390 00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:07,760 Speaker 1: on the other side. 391 00:21:08,040 --> 00:21:10,720 Speaker 3: Wait a minute, Kathy, he pays for his friend. 392 00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:16,720 Speaker 1: Oh, I got it, So why Sophie listen to this man, 393 00:21:16,880 --> 00:21:18,480 Speaker 1: I don't know. Let me get a hold of them. 394 00:21:18,520 --> 00:21:20,639 Speaker 1: Really it comes to baseball bat call me. 395 00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:21,600 Speaker 3: I want to talk to. 396 00:21:21,760 --> 00:21:23,399 Speaker 1: So if you let me just say to you, I 397 00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:26,000 Speaker 1: don't care if you're any six hundred dollars a week, 398 00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:30,280 Speaker 1: you don't have to explain about your unpaid internship. This 399 00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:33,600 Speaker 1: guy is a three years free he's a free loader. 400 00:21:33,840 --> 00:21:36,240 Speaker 1: He's never going to make it happy. It is. We talk, 401 00:21:36,359 --> 00:21:39,680 Speaker 1: Sophie on this show a lot about red flags. This 402 00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:43,560 Speaker 1: one is six red flags causing a hurricane. They're waving 403 00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:46,960 Speaker 1: six flags over New Jersey. Really, six red flags over 404 00:21:47,040 --> 00:21:50,040 Speaker 1: whatever city you're in. Get rid of him, and you 405 00:21:50,080 --> 00:21:53,000 Speaker 1: know what, you say that too often. But this guy, 406 00:21:53,760 --> 00:21:56,399 Speaker 1: but this guy gives somebody the benefit of no. This 407 00:21:56,480 --> 00:21:59,000 Speaker 1: guy's a douche. Yeah. I do not have. 408 00:21:58,920 --> 00:22:01,200 Speaker 3: No respect and no respect. 409 00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:05,560 Speaker 2: But wait, I have to ask you something, Sophie. You 410 00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:09,520 Speaker 2: need to get a little bit more respect for yourself. 411 00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:15,560 Speaker 2: And you do not tolerate anyone, any person, whether it's 412 00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:18,960 Speaker 2: your boyfriend or a friend or a stranger for that matter, 413 00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:21,080 Speaker 2: to treat you in such a way. 414 00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:23,280 Speaker 3: That's just so disrespectful. 415 00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:27,160 Speaker 1: Susan, you couldn't be more right. I love it when 416 00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:27,720 Speaker 1: we agree. 417 00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:28,760 Speaker 3: I do too. 418 00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:33,440 Speaker 1: And this, Yeah, Sophie, listen, if you think magically, after 419 00:22:33,480 --> 00:22:35,560 Speaker 1: what you've been with this guy two years, do you 420 00:22:35,800 --> 00:22:40,280 Speaker 1: honestly think he's going to change. When a man shows 421 00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:44,199 Speaker 1: you who he is the first time, believe him. He 422 00:22:44,280 --> 00:22:47,959 Speaker 1: has shown you. It's been years, Kathy, three years. 423 00:22:48,520 --> 00:22:50,160 Speaker 3: Oh, they were tolerated this. 424 00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:52,760 Speaker 1: Oh, she says, my boyfriend of two years. And then 425 00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:55,159 Speaker 1: she said they've been dating for almost three ye you 426 00:22:55,240 --> 00:22:56,199 Speaker 1: know what dating. 427 00:22:56,240 --> 00:22:57,440 Speaker 3: He didn't treat her either. 428 00:22:57,600 --> 00:22:59,640 Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm saying this is not going to get better 429 00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:03,439 Speaker 1: if you if this relationship turns into a marriage or 430 00:23:03,480 --> 00:23:08,000 Speaker 1: a whatever, offload him. Now. You're young, you have a 431 00:23:08,040 --> 00:23:11,560 Speaker 1: great career ahead of you. Go find someone who deserves 432 00:23:11,600 --> 00:23:15,400 Speaker 1: you and take Susan's advice. A little self respect and 433 00:23:15,440 --> 00:23:16,879 Speaker 1: self love is what you need. 434 00:23:17,080 --> 00:23:24,600 Speaker 2: You better pay rent, gas and groceries on six hundred dollars, Well, 435 00:23:24,640 --> 00:23:25,040 Speaker 2: who knows? 436 00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:25,879 Speaker 3: How are you doing? 437 00:23:25,920 --> 00:23:29,080 Speaker 2: That doesn't matter hard and he doesn't see that, and 438 00:23:29,119 --> 00:23:32,440 Speaker 2: he's making three grand and his mommy and daddy pay 439 00:23:32,560 --> 00:23:33,160 Speaker 2: for his things. 440 00:23:33,200 --> 00:23:34,680 Speaker 3: That's never going to get good. 441 00:23:34,960 --> 00:23:37,600 Speaker 1: Sophie. We love you and we want to hear what happens. 442 00:23:37,640 --> 00:23:41,000 Speaker 1: You've got to get back to us on this, but 443 00:23:41,160 --> 00:23:44,680 Speaker 1: I really, we really hope you get the courage up 444 00:23:45,040 --> 00:23:48,960 Speaker 1: to show this guy the door. Here's the door, here's 445 00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:50,800 Speaker 1: your hat, what's your hurry? 446 00:23:51,600 --> 00:23:54,840 Speaker 2: Maybe if she doesn't want to break it up, then sweetie, 447 00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:57,800 Speaker 2: this is your amount that you're paying to live here. 448 00:23:58,080 --> 00:24:01,320 Speaker 2: This is half of the gas, the groceries, and half 449 00:24:01,320 --> 00:24:03,440 Speaker 2: of the r Oh. I like that, and then I'll 450 00:24:03,440 --> 00:24:07,440 Speaker 2: buy my own damn drinks. I like that, Susan, I 451 00:24:07,560 --> 00:24:10,320 Speaker 2: like that, right, smart enough? So yeah, all right, we're 452 00:24:10,359 --> 00:24:14,000 Speaker 2: sorry about that. Okay, but good luck. Seriously, please write 453 00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:15,720 Speaker 2: us back and let us know how it goes. We 454 00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:21,359 Speaker 2: hope you find your next guy, right guy, soon, very 455 00:24:21,400 --> 00:24:22,240 Speaker 2: soon it. 456 00:24:22,280 --> 00:24:25,680 Speaker 3: Comes my favorite part. It's at this state. 457 00:24:25,760 --> 00:24:29,840 Speaker 1: Okay. So y'all we play moral quandary, Susan struggles, but 458 00:24:29,960 --> 00:24:32,560 Speaker 1: today I feel, I feel the chemistry is here. Today 459 00:24:32,600 --> 00:24:37,280 Speaker 1: she's gonna get it. Okay, so let's go. Susan started 460 00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:38,280 Speaker 1: off with the first one. 461 00:24:38,480 --> 00:24:41,840 Speaker 3: God, all right, now I'm supposed to guess. 462 00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:44,080 Speaker 1: I'm going to guess first what you would do, because 463 00:24:44,080 --> 00:24:44,680 Speaker 1: you're gonna read it. 464 00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:49,480 Speaker 2: Okay, all right, you're spending time with your adult child 465 00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:54,120 Speaker 2: and you overheard them tell their in laws that they're pregnant. 466 00:24:54,359 --> 00:24:57,160 Speaker 2: You pretend not to know anything, but they end up 467 00:24:57,240 --> 00:25:00,720 Speaker 2: not telling you and go to at home. 468 00:25:00,560 --> 00:25:03,680 Speaker 3: For the day. Do you confront them about it? 469 00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:07,600 Speaker 1: Or wait it at Okay? So here's what Susan would do, 470 00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:11,399 Speaker 1: and don't interrupt Susan. Here's what Susan would do. She 471 00:25:11,520 --> 00:25:15,159 Speaker 1: would wait until her daughter, let's call her daughter is 472 00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:18,639 Speaker 1: in labor nine months later and would say, oh, what 473 00:25:18,720 --> 00:25:21,280 Speaker 1: a happy surprise. And if you believe that I have 474 00:25:21,320 --> 00:25:23,119 Speaker 1: a wooden nickel, I'm going to sell you for a 475 00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:27,600 Speaker 1: million bucks. Susan would take her daughter and say, Brittany, 476 00:25:28,560 --> 00:25:30,440 Speaker 1: what's up? How could you tell? 477 00:25:30,480 --> 00:25:30,800 Speaker 4: You? 478 00:25:30,880 --> 00:25:33,120 Speaker 3: Get me coming out of her math? 479 00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:35,199 Speaker 1: That's correct? What would I do? 480 00:25:35,280 --> 00:25:37,120 Speaker 3: I think you do the same exact thing. 481 00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:39,080 Speaker 1: You'd think I would right then and there do it. 482 00:25:39,800 --> 00:25:41,800 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, I'm so excited. As soon as you 483 00:25:41,840 --> 00:25:45,199 Speaker 3: heard it, you would feel thrilled. Nope, you wouldn't that 484 00:25:45,480 --> 00:25:50,480 Speaker 3: you overheard it. You pretend obviously there, Yeah. 485 00:25:50,240 --> 00:25:52,520 Speaker 1: You overheard it. She was telling her in laws, so 486 00:25:52,600 --> 00:25:55,000 Speaker 1: she didn't say, hey, guess what mom and dad and 487 00:25:55,480 --> 00:25:58,240 Speaker 1: in law. She told the in laws what I would do? 488 00:25:58,640 --> 00:26:01,640 Speaker 1: I would my daughter's Caitlin. I would the next day 489 00:26:01,720 --> 00:26:04,760 Speaker 1: or when we got alone, I would say, hey, you're 490 00:26:04,920 --> 00:26:07,960 Speaker 1: pregnant and you didn't tell me. I would, but I 491 00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:10,960 Speaker 1: wouldn't do it right then and there. All right, here's 492 00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:15,439 Speaker 1: the next one. Ready. You catch your good friend picking 493 00:26:15,520 --> 00:26:18,560 Speaker 1: up one of your necklaces and putting it in their 494 00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:21,320 Speaker 1: pocket while they're over at your house along with some 495 00:26:21,400 --> 00:26:24,200 Speaker 1: other friends. Do you does that mean they put other 496 00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:27,280 Speaker 1: friends in their pocket? Okay? Do you confront her in 497 00:26:27,280 --> 00:26:30,320 Speaker 1: front of everyone, wait until everyone leaves, or let it 498 00:26:30,359 --> 00:26:32,359 Speaker 1: go for the night and deal with it later. What 499 00:26:32,400 --> 00:26:33,720 Speaker 1: would I do, Susan. 500 00:26:35,320 --> 00:26:38,360 Speaker 3: Right then and there? Ding ding ding? 501 00:26:38,560 --> 00:26:40,159 Speaker 1: You're absolutely right then? So would you? 502 00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:41,280 Speaker 3: So? 503 00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:43,000 Speaker 1: Brainer guy? 504 00:26:43,400 --> 00:26:44,040 Speaker 3: Absolutely? 505 00:26:44,280 --> 00:26:48,119 Speaker 1: Because you know what, if you did that to me, 506 00:26:49,359 --> 00:26:51,960 Speaker 1: I would be like, she's not my crime. Yeah, I'd 507 00:26:51,960 --> 00:26:54,600 Speaker 1: be like, what exactly? You know? If you need? If 508 00:26:54,720 --> 00:26:59,040 Speaker 1: I would say to you, Susan, if you need somebody 509 00:26:58,920 --> 00:27:00,960 Speaker 1: to give you money, you need that. If you really 510 00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:02,320 Speaker 1: want that necklet give it to you. 511 00:27:02,760 --> 00:27:04,840 Speaker 2: Would you pull her aside or would you do it 512 00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:06,680 Speaker 2: right blatantly in front of everybody? 513 00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:10,399 Speaker 1: I would probably say if it depends on the person. 514 00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:13,240 Speaker 1: But were you, I'd say, Susan, get your sticky hands 515 00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:15,080 Speaker 1: back in your pocket. And give me my necklace back. 516 00:27:15,520 --> 00:27:16,959 Speaker 1: You know, i'd make a joke of it, as I 517 00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:17,560 Speaker 1: often do. 518 00:27:18,640 --> 00:27:21,000 Speaker 2: I would call you into the other room and say, Kathy, 519 00:27:21,040 --> 00:27:22,400 Speaker 2: I'm ready to cry right now. 520 00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:24,760 Speaker 3: I know I saw what you just did. Please tell 521 00:27:24,800 --> 00:27:25,639 Speaker 3: me it's not true. 522 00:27:25,720 --> 00:27:27,000 Speaker 1: Why you know what? I would say? 523 00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:29,400 Speaker 3: What do you think not true? Now? 524 00:27:30,160 --> 00:27:33,440 Speaker 1: It's not true, your po I didn't take that diamond 525 00:27:33,440 --> 00:27:35,800 Speaker 1: necklace that was sitting on your dresser. That's weighing down 526 00:27:35,800 --> 00:27:36,760 Speaker 1: my pocket right now. 527 00:27:37,520 --> 00:27:39,960 Speaker 2: You know what, Kathy, I did have a friend do that. However, 528 00:27:40,119 --> 00:27:40,680 Speaker 2: I did not. 529 00:27:40,880 --> 00:27:41,760 Speaker 3: See them do it. 530 00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:45,040 Speaker 1: But well, and that's the danger, And that's the danger 531 00:27:45,119 --> 00:27:47,720 Speaker 1: if you bring it up later. I didn't take your necklace. 532 00:27:47,760 --> 00:27:48,920 Speaker 3: What are you talking about it? 533 00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:52,199 Speaker 1: All? Right, so we're so far. You're doing well at 534 00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:54,080 Speaker 1: this game day. I just want to commend you. I 535 00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:56,840 Speaker 1: might you're playing it the right way. 536 00:27:57,000 --> 00:27:57,720 Speaker 3: Okay. 537 00:27:58,040 --> 00:28:01,280 Speaker 1: You've decided to throw a New York party for all 538 00:28:01,320 --> 00:28:04,479 Speaker 1: of your closest friends. You send out the invitations, and 539 00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:08,440 Speaker 1: your good friend that recently started seeing someone reaches out 540 00:28:08,480 --> 00:28:11,360 Speaker 1: asking for a plus one. You tell her yes, as 541 00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:13,800 Speaker 1: long as you get to meet him first. He seems 542 00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:17,000 Speaker 1: really wonderful at first, but after one too many drinks, 543 00:28:17,240 --> 00:28:20,120 Speaker 1: he starts getting really loud and obnoxious. Do you still 544 00:28:20,119 --> 00:28:23,000 Speaker 1: give her the plus one or revoke it? What would 545 00:28:23,000 --> 00:28:29,439 Speaker 1: I do? Oh, Susan, come on, you really have to 546 00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:33,840 Speaker 1: think this hard about this one. He probably a New 547 00:28:33,960 --> 00:28:35,879 Speaker 1: Year's Eve party. 548 00:28:36,119 --> 00:28:37,960 Speaker 3: For all your closest friends. 549 00:28:38,040 --> 00:28:41,959 Speaker 2: Yes, you would tell her he can't come unless he 550 00:28:42,040 --> 00:28:42,760 Speaker 2: does a drink. 551 00:28:43,160 --> 00:28:45,080 Speaker 1: You're doing it so well up to that point. 552 00:28:45,240 --> 00:28:47,400 Speaker 3: Oh no, see, do what I do? Just let him. 553 00:28:47,520 --> 00:28:50,840 Speaker 1: I will let him come. Who cares, it's it's you're 554 00:28:50,880 --> 00:28:53,120 Speaker 1: looking at me like this, Kathy, like I should know. 555 00:28:53,240 --> 00:28:55,200 Speaker 3: Oh my god, she's gonna not let him come. 556 00:28:55,240 --> 00:28:58,040 Speaker 1: I'm gonna cry. By the way, you also just told 557 00:28:58,080 --> 00:28:59,960 Speaker 1: me what you were gonna do. You didn't let me guess. 558 00:29:00,440 --> 00:29:02,960 Speaker 3: Okay, I did it. I failed the only ones. 559 00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:05,320 Speaker 1: You know what. It's just like everything else you were doing. 560 00:29:05,360 --> 00:29:06,920 Speaker 1: I gave you in a in the class, and you 561 00:29:06,960 --> 00:29:09,720 Speaker 1: thought you could slide and make me an inch. 562 00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:13,600 Speaker 3: I'd take a yard, all right. 563 00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:16,040 Speaker 1: Do the next question. Your daughter in LAWA. 564 00:29:15,840 --> 00:29:20,200 Speaker 2: Approaches you and tells you, in an emotional state, that 565 00:29:20,320 --> 00:29:24,440 Speaker 2: she suspects your son is cheating on her. Do you 566 00:29:24,520 --> 00:29:28,680 Speaker 2: confront him, wait to hear him out, or stay out 567 00:29:28,720 --> 00:29:28,960 Speaker 2: of it? 568 00:29:29,360 --> 00:29:32,000 Speaker 1: What would I do? What? What would let me say? 569 00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:35,480 Speaker 1: What you would do? There's no question you would do that. 570 00:29:35,680 --> 00:29:39,080 Speaker 1: You would have a confrontation, no question. But you would 571 00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:41,800 Speaker 1: do it nicely and you would do it privately. But 572 00:29:41,880 --> 00:29:44,480 Speaker 1: you would have would punk her and cry with her 573 00:29:44,560 --> 00:29:45,240 Speaker 1: and say please? 574 00:29:45,520 --> 00:29:45,800 Speaker 3: Maybe? 575 00:29:45,800 --> 00:29:48,959 Speaker 1: No, no, that's not the question. Oh my gosh, Susan. 576 00:29:49,040 --> 00:29:50,560 Speaker 3: The question should not stay out of it? Can you 577 00:29:50,720 --> 00:29:52,720 Speaker 3: put out of it? Would you stay out of it? 578 00:29:52,760 --> 00:29:57,080 Speaker 1: Wait a minute? Do you confront your son? Is the issue? Now? 579 00:29:57,200 --> 00:29:57,440 Speaker 4: Yes? 580 00:29:57,560 --> 00:29:59,640 Speaker 1: Okay, Now you're failing with the game. Now now you 581 00:29:59,640 --> 00:30:03,160 Speaker 1: haven't try reading, So we're going downhill here fast like. 582 00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:05,560 Speaker 3: Like I can read. I was guessing what you would do, 583 00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:07,000 Speaker 3: which is part of the game. 584 00:30:07,160 --> 00:30:09,480 Speaker 1: But I was saying what you would do? You would 585 00:30:09,560 --> 00:30:12,840 Speaker 1: confront your son? Yes, okay, what would I do? 586 00:30:12,960 --> 00:30:13,920 Speaker 3: Amongst other things? 587 00:30:13,960 --> 00:30:18,640 Speaker 1: Well, exactly confront Susan, by the way, owns a cadre 588 00:30:18,760 --> 00:30:22,040 Speaker 1: of baseball bounds in all different sizes and colors. Okay, 589 00:30:22,080 --> 00:30:24,720 Speaker 1: what would I do? What would I do? What do 590 00:30:24,760 --> 00:30:25,400 Speaker 1: you think I would do? 591 00:30:25,800 --> 00:30:27,800 Speaker 2: I just said you would confront it, You would talk 592 00:30:27,840 --> 00:30:30,480 Speaker 2: to him, No, I wouldn't. 593 00:30:30,560 --> 00:30:34,200 Speaker 3: You'd never say a word. Some mother in law. You are, 594 00:30:34,440 --> 00:30:35,960 Speaker 3: she's reaching out, babe. 595 00:30:36,160 --> 00:30:38,600 Speaker 1: You know what I would say to her. I would say, 596 00:30:39,400 --> 00:30:42,200 Speaker 1: I only have one daughter in law, so Candy, I 597 00:30:42,200 --> 00:30:45,280 Speaker 1: would say, Candy, that's something you need to talk to 598 00:30:45,320 --> 00:30:48,440 Speaker 1: your husband about. You and Kyle need to And of 599 00:30:48,440 --> 00:30:50,080 Speaker 1: course I hope I never have this. I don't think 600 00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:53,320 Speaker 1: I will. They're very happily married, but I get that 601 00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:56,640 Speaker 1: she's an emotions standing there cry. I would hug her. 602 00:30:57,120 --> 00:30:59,880 Speaker 1: They would love honor. I would say, I'm so sorry 603 00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:02,480 Speaker 1: that you feel this is going on, sweetie, but you 604 00:31:02,640 --> 00:31:04,680 Speaker 1: really need to talk to Kyle about this. 605 00:31:04,680 --> 00:31:05,959 Speaker 3: This is your riage, right. 606 00:31:06,480 --> 00:31:09,160 Speaker 2: I just can't, but i'd still I still say something 607 00:31:09,200 --> 00:31:13,080 Speaker 2: to myself, but I agree, I get it. 608 00:31:13,120 --> 00:31:17,560 Speaker 1: Okay, okay, you notice your two best friends that you 609 00:31:17,720 --> 00:31:20,440 Speaker 1: introduced to each other are hanging out without you more 610 00:31:20,480 --> 00:31:23,040 Speaker 1: and more. Do you call them both out, try to 611 00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:24,800 Speaker 1: talk to one of them, or just let it go? Well, 612 00:31:24,800 --> 00:31:27,920 Speaker 1: now you already know what would I do be Could 613 00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:28,640 Speaker 1: we talked about it? 614 00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:29,520 Speaker 3: Let it go? 615 00:31:29,720 --> 00:31:34,360 Speaker 1: That's right, I would let it go. Yeah, you didn't 616 00:31:34,440 --> 00:31:37,480 Speaker 1: let me guess, but you would let I'm telling you, yeah, 617 00:31:37,600 --> 00:31:38,320 Speaker 1: you would let it go. 618 00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:42,880 Speaker 3: You might make a jump, Yeah, I would balls. 619 00:31:42,960 --> 00:31:47,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, you would, but you know what my feelings my feelings, well, 620 00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:49,040 Speaker 1: what you're calling me now? 621 00:31:49,080 --> 00:31:50,560 Speaker 3: What you two are always together with? 622 00:31:50,720 --> 00:31:52,959 Speaker 1: That is this? Is this the time to tell you 623 00:31:53,000 --> 00:31:56,360 Speaker 1: that Nancy and I are going on a really big vacation. 624 00:31:56,480 --> 00:31:57,280 Speaker 1: You're not invited. 625 00:31:57,560 --> 00:31:59,680 Speaker 3: I am too, I'm coming. I don't care. 626 00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:02,480 Speaker 1: See that's what you do. I'm not a Nancy. I'm 627 00:32:02,520 --> 00:32:03,400 Speaker 1: going anywhere without you. 628 00:32:03,640 --> 00:32:06,120 Speaker 3: Wait? Are you all three bought the tickets? Capic? You 629 00:32:06,240 --> 00:32:07,240 Speaker 3: can't even use that one. 630 00:32:07,400 --> 00:32:08,760 Speaker 1: We're all going to Saint Martin again. 631 00:32:08,800 --> 00:32:12,280 Speaker 2: That's going to be wild ya Wait people, wait, I 632 00:32:12,400 --> 00:32:14,560 Speaker 2: still want to be able to do a podcast. 633 00:32:14,120 --> 00:32:17,960 Speaker 3: From down there on my topless feet. Okay, moving right along, 634 00:32:19,280 --> 00:32:21,400 Speaker 3: All right, go ahead, you got. 635 00:32:21,880 --> 00:32:24,600 Speaker 2: Okay, You've been dating a new guy for about six 636 00:32:24,680 --> 00:32:28,680 Speaker 2: months and everything so far has been great. One night 637 00:32:28,920 --> 00:32:33,120 Speaker 2: you catch him going through your text messages and social 638 00:32:33,320 --> 00:32:37,480 Speaker 2: media DMS, bud. He doesn't realize you see him. Do 639 00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:39,640 Speaker 2: you confront him or let it go? 640 00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:43,720 Speaker 1: Okay, all of you listeners out there, when we have 641 00:32:43,760 --> 00:32:47,760 Speaker 1: these moral quandaries, if one of the choices is let 642 00:32:47,760 --> 00:32:51,000 Speaker 1: it go. For the most part, when I'm guessing Susan's answer, 643 00:32:51,360 --> 00:32:55,240 Speaker 1: let it go is not in her vocabulary, therefore. 644 00:32:56,560 --> 00:32:58,680 Speaker 3: One hundred percent correct. 645 00:32:58,800 --> 00:33:00,880 Speaker 1: This is why we love each other. What would I do? 646 00:33:02,240 --> 00:33:05,280 Speaker 1: And don't get this wrong, think, well. 647 00:33:06,400 --> 00:33:09,320 Speaker 2: I'm overthinking. But if you have nothing to hide, maybe 648 00:33:09,320 --> 00:33:10,240 Speaker 2: you wouldn't say a word. 649 00:33:10,280 --> 00:33:13,920 Speaker 1: You are so wrong. I absolutely would confirm that as 650 00:33:13,920 --> 00:33:17,240 Speaker 1: an invasion of privacy. He has no right, never mind 651 00:33:17,280 --> 00:33:20,120 Speaker 1: dating a guy six months it says a new guy. 652 00:33:20,280 --> 00:33:22,600 Speaker 1: I would absently say, what the hell do you think 653 00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:25,280 Speaker 1: you're doing? And if you don't trust me, and if 654 00:33:25,320 --> 00:33:28,160 Speaker 1: you don't trust me, we can this game is over now. 655 00:33:28,240 --> 00:33:32,720 Speaker 2: So I've had that experience I've had. Yeah, he was terrible. 656 00:33:32,840 --> 00:33:36,240 Speaker 1: Oh my god, all right, well he's done. 657 00:33:36,360 --> 00:33:38,000 Speaker 3: Wow, that's a lot people. 658 00:33:38,040 --> 00:33:40,960 Speaker 1: What do you think? How about you guys? What would 659 00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:41,520 Speaker 1: you do? 660 00:33:42,760 --> 00:33:46,680 Speaker 2: What would you say? Are you agreeing with Kathy or Susan? 661 00:33:48,600 --> 00:33:50,480 Speaker 2: Can't wait to find out? And that does it for 662 00:33:50,560 --> 00:33:52,960 Speaker 2: this episode of our Happy Hour. 663 00:33:53,760 --> 00:33:55,800 Speaker 3: Thanks so much for joining us. We have so much 664 00:33:55,800 --> 00:33:59,160 Speaker 3: fun we do chatting with everybody and reading your questions. 665 00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:02,400 Speaker 1: Be sure to submit your questions because if you don't 666 00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:05,600 Speaker 1: submit them, we can't answer them. It's really easy. All 667 00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:08,400 Speaker 1: you have to do is go to bachelornation dot com. 668 00:34:08,440 --> 00:34:12,560 Speaker 1: Slash Golden Hour. We love connecting with you guys. We 669 00:34:12,640 --> 00:34:14,880 Speaker 1: want to hear what's on your mind. We want to 670 00:34:14,880 --> 00:34:17,680 Speaker 1: give some advice. We want to hear about your lives, 671 00:34:17,719 --> 00:34:20,080 Speaker 1: So please keep those questions coming. We hope that we 672 00:34:20,200 --> 00:34:22,560 Speaker 1: give you advice that at least helps you or makes 673 00:34:22,560 --> 00:34:24,320 Speaker 1: you feel a little bit happier that day. 674 00:34:25,400 --> 00:34:26,360 Speaker 3: And not for anything. 675 00:34:26,360 --> 00:34:30,839 Speaker 2: If you have advice for us, we'll talk about it right. 676 00:34:31,320 --> 00:34:33,040 Speaker 1: Maybe love to hear it wrong, love me. 677 00:34:33,120 --> 00:34:35,719 Speaker 2: Maybe some people out there know what we should be 678 00:34:35,800 --> 00:34:37,280 Speaker 2: doing and we don't. 679 00:34:37,040 --> 00:34:39,239 Speaker 1: Get Maybe they know where to find the guys. 680 00:34:39,719 --> 00:34:43,000 Speaker 2: I don't know, but everybody, please listen to Bachelor Happy 681 00:34:43,040 --> 00:34:47,040 Speaker 2: Hours Golden Hour on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you 682 00:34:47,120 --> 00:34:48,239 Speaker 2: listen to your podcast. 683 00:34:48,680 --> 00:34:50,120 Speaker 3: Thanks for tuning in. We'll see you. 684 00:34:50,120 --> 00:34:51,120 Speaker 1: Sue, have a great week.