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Speaker 1: This is John, this is Sam, your og Okay Storytime

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Speaker 1: podcast hosts. So we have some spectacular stories coming up.

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Speaker 1: But real quick, we got a two minute break from

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Speaker 1: our lovely sponsors keeping this ship sailing.

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Speaker 2: My roommate wanted me to split everything with her everything.

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Speaker 2: I moved in with this roommate in August last year,

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Speaker 2: and ever since then, she's had this habit of going

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Speaker 2: out buying things on her own and then telling me

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Speaker 2: afterward that it's for the apartment and that I owe

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Speaker 2: her half.

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Speaker 3: Ah, lovely, lovely, lovely, I did not want that grill?

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Speaker 2: Did that tune? A sandwich? You just ate fully? Also,

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Speaker 2: we're playing that for half. Sometimes it's things like paper

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Speaker 2: towels or garbage bags, which I already have and don't

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Speaker 2: need her to buy more of.

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Speaker 3: Uh okay, debatable, Okay.

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Speaker 2: Let alone expect me to split the cost. Other Times

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Speaker 2: it's random kitchen gadgets or small pieces of decor. She

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Speaker 2: mentions it super casually too, like, oh, yeah, I got

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Speaker 2: this for us, Just send me half whenever. By the way,

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Speaker 2: this comes from user user name, and if you want

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Speaker 2: to submit your own stories, go to the r slash

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Speaker 2: Okay Storytime supred It I'm key on, I am, and

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Speaker 2: we're here to give good advice. Goofily, we don't know everything, guys,

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Speaker 2: we really don't. Sorry, we only know what we do,

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Speaker 2: so let us know what you do in the comments.

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Speaker 2: As Opie says, by that point, it already feels awkward

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Speaker 2: to say no because the money's already been spent. Most

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Speaker 2: of it I barely even use, and it's obvious it's

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Speaker 2: mostly for her, but somehow I'm still expected to split

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Speaker 2: the cost. It's been quietly building resentment for months, especially

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Speaker 2: because I never agree to any of it beforehand. The

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Speaker 2: other thing that's driving me crazy is what happens when

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Speaker 2: I have friends over. Every single time she comes out

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Speaker 2: of her room and fully inserts herself into the hangout.

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Speaker 3: See, we both have roommates that are our friends. They

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Speaker 3: were friends first before roommates. Yeah, because you're not gonna

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Speaker 3: any activity you're doing with a group of people there

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Speaker 3: your roommates about it, right.

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Speaker 2: If it's as long as it's in like the common area,

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Speaker 2: Like if it's in your own room, like say you're

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Speaker 2: having spicy time, yeah, that's one thing. Or like with

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Speaker 2: a group of people, No, no, no, But like say

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Speaker 2: you feel like you're having.

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Speaker 3: Like she's talking about a group of people.

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Speaker 2: I'm just saying it in general, like, if it's in

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Speaker 2: your room, your friends are coming over. What I you

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Speaker 2: you're watching a movie in your room. Less if your

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Speaker 2: room it's invited, don't come in. That's my that's my case.

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Speaker 3: I think if you have a group of people, if

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Speaker 3: anyone comes over and they're not like.

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Speaker 2: Maybe you are having spicy stuff with a group of people.

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Speaker 2: Who knows.

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Speaker 3: For example, Alex had his friend Blanda come over. What

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Speaker 3: they were hanging out the Blanda, Blanda his name Blanda.

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Speaker 3: I thought his name was Blando for a while, but

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Speaker 3: it's Blanda. It's just his last name. Gotcha, Okay, and

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Speaker 3: Blandon knows everybody.

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Speaker 2: Okay.

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Speaker 3: But they were hanging out in his room playing a

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Speaker 3: game and they shut the door. So I was like, Okay,

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Speaker 3: I'm not gonna go hang out there, but I could

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Speaker 3: if I wanted to hang out in there, they'd let me.

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Speaker 3: They just went in their room because I was like

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Speaker 3: watching a movie in the living room.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that makes that makes total sense. If you're I.

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Speaker 3: Guess, I guess they're not friends the roommate. How can

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Speaker 3: you have a roommate, not be friends with them.

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Speaker 2: Or at least cordial in a sense like we hang out,

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Speaker 2: we do stuff. Or like again, if you're hanging out

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Speaker 2: in the common ara like your living room, and you're

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Speaker 2: hanging out with your friends, you think you would extend

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Speaker 2: the invite or think it's okay or acceptable to invite

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Speaker 2: them unless you tell them otherwise. Hey, we're having like

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Speaker 2: a private thing. Sorry, is it okay? The room go

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Speaker 2: somewhere that case, That's what I was gonna say. If

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Speaker 2: you got to go see a movie, Like, if you're

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Speaker 2: watching a movie, maybe go to somebody else's house.

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Speaker 3: Also, I'm against you on this, Opie.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I feel like Opie's a little bit of a

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Speaker 2: doormat per se. So again, Opie's roommate comes out and

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Speaker 2: she'll hang out with everyone in the common area. She'll

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Speaker 2: sit down and start asking my friends questions or telling

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Speaker 2: long stories about herself, like she's part of the group.

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Speaker 2: My friends are polite, but it's obvious they don't really

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Speaker 2: know her and don't want to have a full conversation

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Speaker 2: with her. Multiple friends have told me afterward that they

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Speaker 2: find her obnoxious, which makes it even more awkward. It's

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Speaker 2: gotten to the point where I hesitate to invite people

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Speaker 2: over because I know she's going to come out and

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Speaker 2: take over the conversation. Even simple things like having a

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Speaker 2: couple of friends over for coffee turn into situations where

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Speaker 2: I'm quietly turning to rescue the hangout without making her

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Speaker 2: feel bad. She seems we're way closer than we actually are,

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Speaker 2: both socially and financially. Feels like she's constantly crossing boundaries

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Speaker 2: without realizing it.

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Speaker 3: She worked from home, she have a lot of friends.

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Speaker 2: There's also, like Riley said earlier, stop inviting friends over

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Speaker 2: to your place, go to theirs. If this is really

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Speaker 2: a case of like, I can't have people over because

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Speaker 2: she's going to assert herself and make it really awkward,

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Speaker 2: it's not just one door to walk through here, you

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Speaker 2: can go somewhere else.

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Speaker 3: Well, it's like move out, ask her to move out.

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Speaker 3: This doesn't have to be your life forever.

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Speaker 2: No. I really want to set boundaries and make the

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Speaker 2: apartment feel comfortable for myself. But I've always struggled with

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Speaker 2: being assertive. I called it out earlier. I don't know

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Speaker 2: how to do it without creating tension. I think she

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Speaker 2: probably believes we're close friends just because we live together.

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Speaker 2: But that's not how I feel. I could really use

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Speaker 2: some advice on how to handle this. And there are

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Speaker 2: some comments. I mean, let's just get into the comments.

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Speaker 2: I think we said our piece. Yeah yeah, coming number one.

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Speaker 2: The next time she says she's bought something for the

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Speaker 2: house and tells you you can send her a half later,

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Speaker 2: just tell her no fair. Let her know that in

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Speaker 2: the past you went along with it because you struggle

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Speaker 2: with the conflict, but that you would like for her

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Speaker 2: to check in with you in the future about things

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Speaker 2: she wants to split. The friend thing is tricky, but

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Speaker 2: I think you could address it the next time you

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Speaker 2: have people over, so I don't know you're having guests

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Speaker 2: and that you would like to have alone time with

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Speaker 2: them without her. If she is unreasonable about either of

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Speaker 2: these and to be reasonable ask, it may be time

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Speaker 2: to look for somewhere else to live. If you aren't

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Speaker 2: capable of bringing things up, then it's definitely time to

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Speaker 2: move and maybe try living alone. Gop responds with I

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Speaker 2: definitely need to address it. I just don't know how

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Speaker 2: to articulate my words. Then everything gives me a little

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Speaker 2: bit of anxiety because I don't want to make people

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Speaker 2: feel bad, but something needs to be said. Rip off

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Speaker 2: that bandai a girl, you need zoom. You're putting people's

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Speaker 2: needs above your own when you are uncomfortable, just though

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Speaker 2: they don't feel weird. Uh, I don't want to bring

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Speaker 2: up the tension if you don't bring up the tent

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Speaker 2: like she doesn't see any tension. I don't want to

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Speaker 2: make people feel uncomfortable.

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Speaker 3: You're uncomfortable cpp she has chronic people pleasing.

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Speaker 2: Yep, you know what.

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Speaker 3: Me and my roommy do make out another thing, Me

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Speaker 3: and my remy do hold hands? No, just say what what?

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Speaker 3: Thank you? For example, he brought a grill, I bought

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Speaker 3: the thing that goes for the grill with Oh my gosh,

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Speaker 3: was it the gas caniser? Okay?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, sure, what is that thing called? Yeah? I would

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Speaker 2: say like, I don't know what kind of girl you

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Speaker 2: got that?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but I bought that. Okay, I bought the TV,

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Speaker 3: he bought the dining said like, yeah, it's very And

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Speaker 3: then when you move out, you know what's yours, you

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Speaker 3: know what's his.

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Speaker 2: It's a very simple thing that if this is your roommate,

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Speaker 2: you should be able to communicate things with your roommate.

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Speaker 2: If they can't listen to you, or they think it's

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Speaker 2: unreasonable to communicate things, or you know what have you,

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Speaker 2: then move out or change your roommate. Very simple, very simple.

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Speaker 2: I think this is your This is probably Opie's first time,

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Speaker 2: most likely living with someone, because I can tell like, oh,

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Speaker 2: I'll just yeah, I'll accept it. I'll say, okay, I'll

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Speaker 2: go with it. Yep. Come number two, think about when

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Speaker 2: you go your separate ways. She's not going to let

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Speaker 2: you take anything you've paid fifty percent of, so stop paying.

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Speaker 2: I'd actually start asking now, quote saying, what's going to

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Speaker 2: happen if one of us moves out? How are we

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Speaker 2: going to divide the items we've bought jointly? If you

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Speaker 2: want to keep them all, you could pay me back.

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Speaker 2: You can pay me back the money they cost, and

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Speaker 2: I'll stop using them. I He responds with I haven't

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Speaker 2: really been using any of the things she's bought anyway,

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Speaker 2: So that's going to be the easier conversation of the two.

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Speaker 2: We do have an update. What's your prediction here do

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Speaker 2: you think? I think there's a couple of routes. First

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Speaker 2: one is the easiest one. I think is just moving

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Speaker 2: out or a new roommate. Second one probably for OPI

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Speaker 2: is probably the hardest one. He's having the conversation and

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Speaker 2: things actually work out, like the roommate's cool, respects your boundaries,

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Speaker 2: it stops asking you to split things. I think that's

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Speaker 2: another one third one. Y'all go fisticuffs, winner take all fair.

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Speaker 3: You could do that. That that could work. I don't know. Man,

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Speaker 3: hope he has the conversation. I don't think honestly, I

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Speaker 3: don't think the room is gonna take a while.

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Speaker 2: I don't think so either, But we'll see. Onto the

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Speaker 2: update update. I finally had a direct conversation with her

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Speaker 2: because the situation was making me uncomfortable in my own

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Speaker 2: home and I didn't want to keep building it into resentment.

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Speaker 2: I made sure to stay calm, respectful, and clear about

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Speaker 2: what I needed without it turning into a personal attack. Smart.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I wonder how she takes a friend thing. That's

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Speaker 3: gonna be the hardest.

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Speaker 2: I think the friend thing is.

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Speaker 3: I don't like it.

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Speaker 2: Well, we're gonna find out, Opie says. I started with

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Speaker 2: the money issue. I explained that I'm not okay with

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Speaker 2: being asked to split costs. After she's already bought something.

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Speaker 2: I told her that unless we both degree ahead of

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Speaker 2: time that something is shared, I'm not paying for it.

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Speaker 2: I also pointed out that I already buy my own

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Speaker 2: household supplies, but I don't need duplicates I didn't ask for.

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Speaker 2: She said she thought she was being helpful, but I

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Speaker 2: explained that help only worked if I wanted it. She

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Speaker 2: didn't really argue with this, although she did say it

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Speaker 2: made things feel transactional, which confused me considering she was

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Speaker 2: asking me to reimburse her after the fact. Then I

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Speaker 2: brought up the social boundary issue.

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Speaker 3: She responded to that that, well, we're gonna see.

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Speaker 2: Oh gosh, well see how Opie goes about this situation.

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Speaker 2: I explain, when I have friends over, I expect to

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Speaker 2: be able to spend time with them without feeling like

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Speaker 2: I have to manage in another social dynamic. I told

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Speaker 2: her it had gotten to the point where I was

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Speaker 2: hesitant to invite people over at all because she consistently

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Speaker 2: inserted herself into the hangouts. I was clear that shared

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Speaker 2: living space doesn't automatically mean shared social time, and that

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Speaker 2: I would never do the same thing when she has

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Speaker 2: friends over. This part of the conversation didn't go as smoothly.

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Speaker 2: She said she felt excluded and that she thought we

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Speaker 2: were closer than we actually are. Wrong.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I kind of had a similar thing happened to

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Speaker 3: me where my ex at the time. She wanted family time.

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Speaker 3: She wanted time to spend with her family. Okay, but

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Speaker 3: her family didn't really like me. But I respected it, okay, and.

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Speaker 2: Like you were including family time or it was just

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Speaker 2: her family time.

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Speaker 3: It was just her family. I was not included, okay.

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Speaker 3: But with Angie and her family, I'm like, hey, do

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Speaker 3: you want your family time? She's like, no, I'm good,

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Speaker 3: you can come hang out with us. Like really, you're

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Speaker 3: cool with that? Like Vegas this weekend, we get a miscommunication.

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Speaker 3: I thought she wanted to go there to spend time

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Speaker 3: with her family, so I was like, I'm not gonna go,

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Speaker 3: m but she really wanted me to go, and she

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Speaker 3: was hurt by it because I didn't say or I

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Speaker 3: didn't express that I would want to go. So we

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Speaker 3: both we both had a miscommunication there, but then we

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Speaker 3: talked it out and we figured it out.

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Speaker 2: It's, yeah, it's the one communicating, but also assuming you

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Speaker 2: assume and you know when you assume you know what

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Speaker 2: that dust you.

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Speaker 3: And that person. But it so, that's why this assumption,

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Speaker 3: which I think OPU telling her that is something that

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Speaker 3: needed to happen.

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Speaker 2: Honesty sometimes is best policy. Oh, he continues with. I

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Speaker 2: acknowledged her feelings, but reiterated that closeness can't be assumed,

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Speaker 2: especially when it comes to finances and social boundaries. I

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Speaker 2: didn't raise my voice or say anything unkind, but she

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Speaker 2: still became defensive and said I was making her feel

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Speaker 2: singled out. The conversation ended awkwardly because she shut down

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Speaker 2: rather than engaging with what I was saying. She didn't

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Speaker 2: talk to me for the rest of the night, which

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Speaker 2: was uncomfortable, but I didn't feel like I had said

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Speaker 2: anything unreasonable. Since then, the practical issues haven't proved exactly

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Speaker 2: the way I asked for. She hasn't asked me to

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Speaker 2: pay for anything she bought on her own, and when

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Speaker 2: I've had friends over, she no longer inserts herself into

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Speaker 2: the hangouts. That alone has made a noticeable difference. However,

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Speaker 2: she's been a bit colder overall and occasionally makes passive

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Speaker 2: comments like oh, I didn't want to intrude, which feels

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Speaker 2: less like respecting boundaries and more like still adjusting to them.

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Speaker 2: Even with that, I don't regret having the conversation. The

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Speaker 2: apartment is genuinely more comfortable now. I can tell she's

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Speaker 2: still adjusting, and while the awkwardness isn't ideal, it feels

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Speaker 2: like a normal part of resetting expectations that probably should

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Speaker 2: have been clear from the beginning. I finally feel like

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Speaker 2: I can exist in my own space without constantly feeling uncomfortable,

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Speaker 2: which is really the whole goal. We do have some

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Speaker 2: comments here.

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Speaker 3: Dude, I'm sorry. This reminds me Alex bought a new

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Speaker 3: trash can. Okay, and it's like a Alex does this thing?

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Speaker 2: What kind of trash can?

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Speaker 3: It's my roommate, Alex. Yeah, yeah, I'll get to that.

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Speaker 3: My roommate Alex is this thing where he'll get something.

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Speaker 3: He will, at least I love him so much. The

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Speaker 3: second he gets it, he'll say how much it is normally,

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Speaker 3: and then he'll say he got for free. Every time. Dude,

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Speaker 3: this is like a.

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Speaker 2: This is like a fifty thousand dollars trash can.

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Speaker 3: It's like a two hundred dollars trash can.

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Speaker 2: Guess what what what I got free? Yeah?

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Speaker 3: There's two hundred dollars trash can. A lot of like

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Speaker 3: rich people have it, like this person. This person had

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Speaker 3: I went to this rapper's house and they had this

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Speaker 3: trash can.

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Speaker 2: And do you ask him how do he got that

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Speaker 2: trash can?

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Speaker 3: Or yeah, and my first question is did you get

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Speaker 3: it from the side of the street. And he was like, no,

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Speaker 3: not for this one. But he bought a trash can

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Speaker 3: for this one. And he usually buy the things that

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Speaker 3: are a little too big for the for the apartment,

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Speaker 3: and this.

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Speaker 2: Has what you don't say, I've been to your apartment.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, the couch, yeah yeah, yeah, Well, and I

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Speaker 3: will I buy things that are a little too big

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Speaker 3: for the part two We both do. It's just a

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Speaker 3: small apartment and the trash can is like double wide,

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Speaker 3: and like there's a chair at a dining room that

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Speaker 3: we can't get to now because of the trash can.

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Speaker 3: But it's a nice trash can and it keeps the

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Speaker 3: smell out.

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Speaker 2: Oh okay, it's called just take out your trash and

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Speaker 2: spray it. I don't think you need the most expensive

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Speaker 2: trash can.

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Speaker 3: Well it's already there, I know.

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Speaker 2: Okay, but he'll do that.

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Speaker 3: It's funny he's got a four hundred dollars toaster that

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Speaker 3: he bought and found on the side of the road.

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Speaker 2: Why do you Okay, I'm a simple man. I don't

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Speaker 2: need those things.

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Speaker 3: Dude, you are not a simple man. You buy so

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Speaker 3: many legos, you have so much stuff. Yeah, you literally

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Speaker 3: just told me how much stuff you're gonna buy in Japan.

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Speaker 2: Yeah it's called simple needs.

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Speaker 3: Those aren't needs.

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Speaker 2: Oh, those are needs.

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Speaker 3: Those I don't want.

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Speaker 2: Those are needs.

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Speaker 3: You don't even build them, you just buy them in

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Speaker 3: the box.

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Speaker 2: I need them. Anyways, we have some comments comming. Number one,

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Speaker 2: you handle the first issue of her buying things for

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Speaker 2: the apartment and expecting you to pay the half perfectly.

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Speaker 2: The second issue not exactly how I would have recommended

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Speaker 2: you manage it. Everything might feel great for you right now,

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Speaker 2: but every time you have people over and she stays

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Speaker 2: in her room the entire time, resentment will build. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I was gonna say, you should have been like, there

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Speaker 2: are times where I wanted to just hang out with

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Speaker 2: my friends, but there should be also times where you

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Speaker 2: can come and hang out and we can do things

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Speaker 2: like you just told me. Like m you're a roommate,

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Speaker 2: but you don't belong to hang out with my friends.

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Speaker 2: My friends are separate from you.

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Speaker 3: That is what you said.

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Speaker 2: Not a good way to do that. She shouldn't have

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00:13:17,240 --> 00:13:20,280
Speaker 2: included herself into your friends if she wasn't invited. But

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Speaker 2: you both pay for the apartment. Therefore shared space is

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Speaker 2: just that shared, so she had every right to not

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Speaker 2: lock herself away in her room. Your conversation was exactly

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Speaker 2: the opposite. I really hope things work out well, but

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00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:33,240
Speaker 2: please prepare for the worst. I have a feeling she

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Speaker 2: will break in. Any crazy you've seen this far will

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Speaker 2: be minor coming too. Yeah. From a glance, Opie seems

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Speaker 2: to have been cruel. Why not let your roommates chill

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Speaker 2: in the living room. It is their home too, unless

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Speaker 2: they are specifically creating a weird vibe. Possibly, I guess

348
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Speaker 2: there's a reply saying, if they're creating a weird vibe,

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Speaker 2: talk to them about it, get them suggestions on how

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Speaker 2: to tone it down, correct that behavior. No, that's not

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Speaker 2: Opie's obligation or responsibility, but it's so much nicer than

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Speaker 2: saying nobody likes you. Please don't be in the living

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Speaker 2: room when I had people over, which is apparently quite often.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, Yeah, that's exactly what you said.

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00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:06,839
Speaker 2: There is a little bit less edit. There's an edit.

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Speaker 2: Do you want to get straight into it or I'm

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Speaker 2: just I don't know it just I mean, I think

358
00:14:10,840 --> 00:14:13,800
Speaker 2: we said our piece weird. When it comes to roommates,

359
00:14:13,960 --> 00:14:17,000
Speaker 2: you can't control the entire place. You can control your room,

360
00:14:17,120 --> 00:14:21,560
Speaker 2: they can control their room. But sharing a space, bathroom, kitchen,

361
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Speaker 2: what have you. If it's a shared space, you gotta

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Speaker 2: share it. He doesn't belong to you. Not a good

363
00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:31,120
Speaker 2: way of going about it. Op again, if you're like, ah,

364
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Speaker 2: I want to hang out with my friends, go hang

365
00:14:32,760 --> 00:14:35,120
Speaker 2: out with your friends somewhere else. But there is an edit.

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Speaker 2: I woke up to a lot of nasty comments today,

367
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Speaker 2: so I want to address something. I didn't say what

368
00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:41,680
Speaker 2: I wrote here verbatim to her, and maybe that's why

369
00:14:41,680 --> 00:14:43,560
Speaker 2: it comes off like I was nasty. Someone on my

370
00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:45,680
Speaker 2: last page gave me a guideline of what to say,

371
00:14:45,760 --> 00:14:48,000
Speaker 2: and life followed it closely. I wasn't telling her not

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Speaker 2: to be around. I clearly explained that I don't get

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Speaker 2: to see my friends often, and then it would be

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Speaker 2: nice if we could hang out separately. Sometimes I probably

375
00:14:54,280 --> 00:14:57,080
Speaker 2: should have included bad detail. Originally, This happened only two

376
00:14:57,160 --> 00:14:59,800
Speaker 2: days ago, and after reading comments, I understand now that

377
00:14:59,840 --> 00:15:02,560
Speaker 2: she may have been more hurt than I realized. I'm

378
00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:04,760
Speaker 2: planning to talk to her again, possibly set up a

379
00:15:04,760 --> 00:15:06,960
Speaker 2: one on one hangout, and reassure her. And that is

380
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:07,480
Speaker 2: the end of that.

381
00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:08,080
Speaker 3: Okay.

382
00:15:08,480 --> 00:15:11,920
Speaker 2: I feel like integrating as someone who integrates everybody. Yeah,

383
00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:15,840
Speaker 2: I love making connections. You do, Yeah, like I integrated,

384
00:15:16,160 --> 00:15:18,760
Speaker 2: Like no, I said, I thought you said with a question,

385
00:15:18,920 --> 00:15:20,960
Speaker 2: I was like, oh yeah. Sometimes you you know, friend

386
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,240
Speaker 2: groups can't be aligned or like someone's will get a

387
00:15:23,240 --> 00:15:26,120
Speaker 2: weird out. But if it's I feel like it's nice

388
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:28,080
Speaker 2: and like you can talk to them, so your roommate,

389
00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:30,640
Speaker 2: you can. You should have clear communication with them and

390
00:15:30,840 --> 00:15:33,080
Speaker 2: they should be able to listen. And uh, it seems

391
00:15:33,080 --> 00:15:35,800
Speaker 2: like that's going in the right direction. But I think

392
00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:38,200
Speaker 2: you should include her with your friends when they come over.

393
00:15:38,440 --> 00:15:41,400
Speaker 2: Not all the time, but maybe sometimes just to include someone.

394
00:15:41,520 --> 00:15:43,640
Speaker 2: Being included feels nice. What it was the you know,

395
00:15:43,720 --> 00:15:46,280
Speaker 2: the other way around Ope where she was inviting her

396
00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:49,120
Speaker 2: friends over and she told you, no, you can't come

397
00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:50,840
Speaker 2: out here. We don't want to hang out with you.

398
00:15:50,880 --> 00:15:54,520
Speaker 2: Nobody likes you. Your presence is annoying. It wouldn't feel great.

399
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Speaker 3: It's so sad.

400
00:15:55,520 --> 00:15:57,720
Speaker 2: Obviously she didn't say it like Obviously, OPI didn't say

401
00:15:57,760 --> 00:15:59,240
Speaker 2: it like that, But at the end of the day,

402
00:15:59,400 --> 00:16:00,160
Speaker 2: it sounds like it.

403
00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:01,160
Speaker 3: It really does.

404
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:02,960
Speaker 2: So that is the of that story.

405
00:16:03,240 --> 00:16:06,120
Speaker 3: We got another one, Yes, we do. My roommate has

406
00:16:06,160 --> 00:16:09,360
Speaker 3: been extremely inconsiderate to me and I want her out.

407
00:16:09,680 --> 00:16:11,000
Speaker 2: Well, how about you get out?

408
00:16:11,240 --> 00:16:13,760
Speaker 3: Hi, I own a mobile home park in a close

409
00:16:13,800 --> 00:16:16,400
Speaker 3: community park. The rules are a little tight, but the

410
00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:19,280
Speaker 3: park itself is very nice and my landlord is generally

411
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Speaker 3: very reasonable. What are the rules? States that there could

412
00:16:21,760 --> 00:16:25,240
Speaker 3: be no unauthorized overnight guests, which I have come to

413
00:16:25,320 --> 00:16:28,000
Speaker 3: understand that means people who are not on the lease

414
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:30,360
Speaker 3: should not be here most days of the week. This

415
00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:34,400
Speaker 3: understanding came after several conversations with my landlord where she

416
00:16:34,480 --> 00:16:39,360
Speaker 3: cites accountability and liability issues she has experienced with previous tenants.

417
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Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from wobble, drones and a

418
00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:44,280
Speaker 3: feudals old stories go to guar slash okay stories. I'm Subreddit,

419
00:16:44,360 --> 00:16:45,320
Speaker 3: I'm Riley.

420
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Speaker 2: I'm Keon, and we're here to give good advice.

421
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Speaker 3: Scoofully, you're here to comment Opey says to breakface a bit.

422
00:16:49,760 --> 00:16:52,600
Speaker 3: My roommate is recently divorced and came to me for

423
00:16:52,680 --> 00:16:55,000
Speaker 3: help while she was in the process a leaving her

424
00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:57,640
Speaker 3: husband mobile home like a trailer.

425
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Speaker 2: It sounds like a mobile like, yeah, like a trailer park,

426
00:17:00,760 --> 00:17:03,840
Speaker 2: but like, yeah, they're you know what those those areas? Yeah, yeah,

427
00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:05,760
Speaker 2: that's what I would picture as well.

428
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Speaker 3: My uncle like rents those out to people.

429
00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:09,280
Speaker 2: Yeah.

430
00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:11,520
Speaker 3: I agree that she could stay in my spare room

431
00:17:11,560 --> 00:17:15,119
Speaker 3: for an incredibly reasonable rent price, and I even wound

432
00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:17,879
Speaker 3: up lowering the rent after my partner moved in, which

433
00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:20,520
Speaker 3: I will touch on later. The agreement was that she

434
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Speaker 3: could stay as long as it took her to get

435
00:17:22,640 --> 00:17:25,400
Speaker 3: back on her feet. At first, things were pretty all right.

436
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:28,760
Speaker 3: She always paid her rent on time and was very

437
00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:32,640
Speaker 3: communicative about any issue she had. It was honestly nice

438
00:17:32,680 --> 00:17:36,560
Speaker 3: to have another detail oriented female energy close by. Oh no,

439
00:17:36,960 --> 00:17:38,680
Speaker 3: I think I see what's about to happen here.

440
00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:39,600
Speaker 2: Let's see.

441
00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:41,800
Speaker 3: The only thing that would bother me at the stage

442
00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:46,199
Speaker 3: was that she would consistently come home very upset after

443
00:17:46,280 --> 00:17:49,879
Speaker 3: sneaking off to her soon to be X's house, the

444
00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:52,679
Speaker 3: one she's divorcing. To be clear, it was none of

445
00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:55,320
Speaker 3: my business, and I did not really care where she

446
00:17:55,440 --> 00:17:57,880
Speaker 3: spent her time, asides from the fact that it left

447
00:17:57,920 --> 00:18:01,000
Speaker 3: her extremely upset and she lying to me about it

448
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:04,280
Speaker 3: for literally no reason. She said she did not once

449
00:18:04,280 --> 00:18:07,520
Speaker 3: to feel judged, which I understood, but I also did

450
00:18:07,560 --> 00:18:10,800
Speaker 3: not like the feeling of being lied to, especially over

451
00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:14,160
Speaker 3: something so arbitrary. She did move out briefly and tried

452
00:18:14,200 --> 00:18:17,720
Speaker 3: to reconcile her marriage, but less than three weeks later

453
00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:19,359
Speaker 3: she moved back in.

454
00:18:19,760 --> 00:18:21,520
Speaker 2: She said she didn't want to be judged, but she

455
00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:25,679
Speaker 2: was one lying, sneaking off, fooling around with the person

456
00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:28,800
Speaker 2: she was divorcing. You're gonna be judged because like you

457
00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:31,399
Speaker 2: shouldn't be doing those things. She sounds, I don't know,

458
00:18:31,440 --> 00:18:34,120
Speaker 2: to me, like a girl, like a like a high

459
00:18:34,119 --> 00:18:37,240
Speaker 2: school girl, yeah, or just like a high schooler in general.

460
00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:40,240
Speaker 3: I would care. I'm literally helping you get back on

461
00:18:40,280 --> 00:18:44,800
Speaker 3: your feet after your divorce. Don't go making that problem worse.

462
00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:49,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, or prolonging this problem or yeah, exactly, it's sorry.

463
00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:52,159
Speaker 2: But like you, the fact that like, don't judge me

464
00:18:52,640 --> 00:18:55,679
Speaker 2: start sounds like you're already judging yourself and you what

465
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:58,320
Speaker 2: you know, what you're doing is bad. Or wrong.

466
00:18:58,800 --> 00:19:02,439
Speaker 3: Yeah. Soon after that, the divorce was finalized, which I

467
00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:06,520
Speaker 3: thought would be a positive turning point. Things continued to

468
00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:09,200
Speaker 3: go well for a few weeks. She made plans to

469
00:19:09,240 --> 00:19:11,320
Speaker 3: go back to school, which she has stuck with so far,

470
00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:13,320
Speaker 3: and I am proud of her for that. She started

471
00:19:13,320 --> 00:19:16,880
Speaker 3: spending time with a guy from work, which quickly evolved

472
00:19:17,200 --> 00:19:20,639
Speaker 3: into a relationship. I was happy to see her moving on,

473
00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:24,040
Speaker 3: or at least trying to move on. Unfortunately, things started

474
00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:27,000
Speaker 3: to get very strange. At this point. She began sneaking

475
00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:29,640
Speaker 3: in the new guy into the house. When I called

476
00:19:29,640 --> 00:19:33,040
Speaker 3: her out on it, citing the least rules and basic consideration,

477
00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:36,760
Speaker 3: she got defensive. Several days later, she ultimately agreed to

478
00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:39,800
Speaker 3: at least let me know when she has company coming over.

479
00:19:40,040 --> 00:19:43,400
Speaker 3: I saw this behavior as incredibly disrespectful to the household,

480
00:19:43,560 --> 00:19:45,880
Speaker 3: but I pushed it off to maintain the piece. From

481
00:19:45,960 --> 00:19:47,640
Speaker 3: that point on, things got worse.

482
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:51,000
Speaker 2: You sound like her mother, Yeah, you sound like her mom.

483
00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:53,280
Speaker 3: I get it's a rule and you don't want to

484
00:19:53,280 --> 00:19:53,960
Speaker 3: get kicked out.

485
00:19:54,119 --> 00:19:55,399
Speaker 2: Hey, rules are meant to be broken.

486
00:19:55,840 --> 00:19:56,960
Speaker 3: This is something that's weird.

487
00:19:57,280 --> 00:20:00,280
Speaker 2: No, I totally get it. I want to a peace end, Like, Hey,

488
00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:02,800
Speaker 2: I'm giving you the luxury to stay here. This is

489
00:20:02,840 --> 00:20:07,119
Speaker 2: technically Op's place. If you're gonna break those rules and

490
00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:08,880
Speaker 2: go against it, sure, I think once in a blue

491
00:20:08,880 --> 00:20:10,880
Speaker 2: moon whatever, But if you're doing this consistently, and you're

492
00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:13,959
Speaker 2: consistently lying to me, if you want to keep doing that,

493
00:20:14,119 --> 00:20:15,919
Speaker 2: go stay hit his place, yep, get out of here

494
00:20:15,920 --> 00:20:17,760
Speaker 2: and get you don't. I don't need you here anymore.

495
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:21,120
Speaker 3: While she now tells me when he is coming over

496
00:20:21,359 --> 00:20:24,199
Speaker 3: he spends most nights at my house because she doesn't

497
00:20:24,400 --> 00:20:25,480
Speaker 3: like his house anymore.

498
00:20:25,720 --> 00:20:27,399
Speaker 2: Oh pooh freakin' who.

499
00:20:27,960 --> 00:20:30,479
Speaker 3: I could spend a long time trying to unpack that,

500
00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:33,600
Speaker 3: but this story is already long, and there is still more.

501
00:20:33,920 --> 00:20:36,959
Speaker 3: My landlord approached me and told me two things. First,

502
00:20:37,080 --> 00:20:39,720
Speaker 3: we needed to stop leaving ruts in the yard, which

503
00:20:39,840 --> 00:20:41,800
Speaker 3: was caused by our boyfriend being over five to seven

504
00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:42,480
Speaker 3: nights a week.

505
00:20:42,720 --> 00:20:45,399
Speaker 2: Ruts with ruts, I have no idea. Look, I have

506
00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:46,280
Speaker 2: no idea what it is.

507
00:20:46,280 --> 00:20:48,600
Speaker 3: What does it mean when someone says stop leaving ruts?

508
00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:49,600
Speaker 2: That was rats?

509
00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:52,479
Speaker 3: And I was like, no phrase, stop reaving, no ruts?

510
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:53,800
Speaker 2: Look up? What are ruts?

511
00:20:54,040 --> 00:20:59,000
Speaker 3: Stop leaving riz ruts? What they're ruts? A long, deep

512
00:20:59,080 --> 00:21:02,560
Speaker 3: track made by the oh by like repeating passage of

513
00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:05,520
Speaker 3: a vehicle. Okay, it's like a like walking tire marks.

514
00:21:05,560 --> 00:21:07,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh like moving Yeah, I get that makes sense.

515
00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:10,280
Speaker 3: Which was caused by her boyfriend being over five to

516
00:21:10,320 --> 00:21:13,440
Speaker 3: seven nights a week. Second, her boyfriend could not stay

517
00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:16,040
Speaker 3: here that often without being on the lease. I worked

518
00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:18,399
Speaker 3: out a compromise where the boyfriend could be here on

519
00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:21,400
Speaker 3: weekends as long as we addressed the ruts, the grass,

520
00:21:21,440 --> 00:21:24,720
Speaker 3: and the parking situation. She verbally agreed to this arrangement.

521
00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:26,639
Speaker 3: I woke up the next morning to find that she

522
00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:30,280
Speaker 3: had snugged him in anyway. When I asked why she

523
00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:33,320
Speaker 3: did not even send a text, she said, I did

524
00:21:33,359 --> 00:21:36,080
Speaker 3: not want to risk waking you up, despite everything I

525
00:21:36,119 --> 00:21:38,920
Speaker 3: had gone through with my landlord to arrange this compromise

526
00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:41,960
Speaker 3: for her. For additional context, my partner lives separately for

527
00:21:42,040 --> 00:21:45,320
Speaker 3: the first portion of our relationship. Recently, he was involved

528
00:21:45,359 --> 00:21:47,840
Speaker 3: in a house fire that left him without his apartment.

529
00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:50,119
Speaker 3: After a few days of him staying with me while

530
00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:52,480
Speaker 3: dealing with the Red Cross and realizing he would not

531
00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:54,919
Speaker 3: be getting his unit back, we decided it would be

532
00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:57,000
Speaker 3: easier and better for him to move in with me.

533
00:21:57,359 --> 00:22:00,800
Speaker 3: His moving in had been mentioned casually for months, but

534
00:22:00,960 --> 00:22:03,600
Speaker 3: the fire is what made it happen quickly. During the

535
00:22:03,600 --> 00:22:06,159
Speaker 3: week we were preparing for him to move in, I

536
00:22:06,280 --> 00:22:09,399
Speaker 3: explained the situation to my roommate multiple times. On his

537
00:22:09,520 --> 00:22:12,920
Speaker 3: first real night fully moving in, she started suggesting rentals

538
00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:15,840
Speaker 3: in the area that might fit his budget.

539
00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:18,320
Speaker 2: Grilly Pop, do you remember that I gave you the

540
00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:22,399
Speaker 2: luxury that this is my place and I was helping

541
00:22:22,440 --> 00:22:23,679
Speaker 2: you get back on your feet.

542
00:22:23,560 --> 00:22:26,600
Speaker 3: And I gave you a pretty dang good deal.

543
00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:29,920
Speaker 2: And you keep altering the deal or you think, now

544
00:22:29,920 --> 00:22:32,439
Speaker 2: this is your place and you get to decide things.

545
00:22:32,880 --> 00:22:35,720
Speaker 3: This was instead of being welcoming to someone who had

546
00:22:35,880 --> 00:22:39,800
Speaker 3: just nearly lost everything in a fire. Shortly after that,

547
00:22:39,920 --> 00:22:42,800
Speaker 3: she asked me to lower her rent again because there

548
00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:46,080
Speaker 3: was now another roommate showing no concern for the fact

549
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:48,760
Speaker 3: that we were navigating something devastating.

550
00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:49,920
Speaker 2: It's transactional.

551
00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:50,880
Speaker 3: It's transactional.

552
00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:53,600
Speaker 2: This is another thing. What. I am not a fan

553
00:22:53,800 --> 00:22:57,879
Speaker 2: of verbal agreements or like a verbal contracts. Really they're cool,

554
00:22:58,080 --> 00:22:59,879
Speaker 2: but I think you needed a written on paper. Just

555
00:23:00,160 --> 00:23:01,679
Speaker 2: be like bing bingg bing bang bing bing bing bing

556
00:23:01,720 --> 00:23:04,160
Speaker 2: bing right here, and you should also be like there's

557
00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:06,440
Speaker 2: a three strike rule or whatever, or like, if you

558
00:23:06,520 --> 00:23:09,760
Speaker 2: keep doing it, you will be out of here kind

559
00:23:09,800 --> 00:23:12,040
Speaker 2: of thing. I like those, sorry, I like the contracts

560
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:14,040
Speaker 2: where it's like you can visually see it and I'm

561
00:23:14,080 --> 00:23:16,280
Speaker 2: gonna put an X right there. Don't want be that person.

562
00:23:16,320 --> 00:23:18,640
Speaker 2: But you're not following the rules and you're not, you know,

563
00:23:18,760 --> 00:23:20,240
Speaker 2: respecting me or my boundaries.

564
00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:23,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's true. Not long before this, my boyfriend and

565
00:23:23,560 --> 00:23:26,080
Speaker 3: I made plans to attend an event in his hometown.

566
00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:28,679
Speaker 3: I made arrangements with my roommate to feed my cats

567
00:23:28,720 --> 00:23:29,560
Speaker 3: while we were gone.

568
00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:30,760
Speaker 2: Oh great.

569
00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:34,720
Speaker 3: I checked in every other day, and each time she

570
00:23:34,800 --> 00:23:37,399
Speaker 3: confirmed that she would be there. About twenty four hours

571
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:39,960
Speaker 3: before we left, she told me she had made plans

572
00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:43,800
Speaker 3: to leave town as well. Wait what twenty four hours

573
00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:45,880
Speaker 3: she did help me set up Okay, well, she didn't

574
00:23:45,880 --> 00:23:48,920
Speaker 3: help me set up an automatic feeder, which I appreciated.

575
00:23:49,080 --> 00:23:51,960
Speaker 3: Unfortunately it did not matter because my cats never got

576
00:23:52,080 --> 00:23:54,040
Speaker 3: used to it. My boy friend and I left before

577
00:23:54,080 --> 00:23:56,560
Speaker 3: she did, and she ended up closing my cat in

578
00:23:56,600 --> 00:24:00,359
Speaker 3: her room for thirty six hours with no food, no water,

579
00:24:00,640 --> 00:24:04,040
Speaker 3: and nowhere else to use the bathroom. Instead of apologizing,

580
00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:06,320
Speaker 3: she told me my cat had deprecated on her bed

581
00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:08,480
Speaker 3: and that was the end of the conversation.

582
00:24:08,880 --> 00:24:11,800
Speaker 2: Oh wow, girly pop, ya left my cat in your

583
00:24:11,880 --> 00:24:15,160
Speaker 2: room with no food, no water, nowhere to use the bathroom,

584
00:24:15,280 --> 00:24:18,080
Speaker 2: and of course it went on your bed. Good kitty.

585
00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:20,480
Speaker 3: At this point, I'm playing a fun new game. It's

586
00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:23,000
Speaker 3: called how much stuff can We put in this box

587
00:24:23,119 --> 00:24:24,840
Speaker 3: and put on the side of the road as fast

588
00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:26,720
Speaker 3: as we can? And it's all your stuff in your room.

589
00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:27,040
Speaker 1: Go.

590
00:24:27,720 --> 00:24:28,480
Speaker 2: I love that game.

591
00:24:28,640 --> 00:24:29,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, you ever played it before?

592
00:24:30,119 --> 00:24:30,600
Speaker 2: I want to.

593
00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:33,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're gonna be playing it soon. Maybe, Dan, you're

594
00:24:33,119 --> 00:24:35,359
Speaker 3: gonna have to move soon. Yeah, find a place.

595
00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:37,280
Speaker 2: No looking at places right now?

596
00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:39,640
Speaker 3: Look good? Live here. Kids. Just knocking on your door

597
00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:40,800
Speaker 3: ke on while you're not work yet.

598
00:24:40,960 --> 00:24:41,760
Speaker 2: Sounds like my dad.

599
00:24:42,000 --> 00:24:45,439
Speaker 3: Ha oh man. We also had agreed upon a rule

600
00:24:45,520 --> 00:24:48,080
Speaker 3: that she would not use the dryer when I'm asleep.

601
00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:50,480
Speaker 3: The dryer is right next to my bedroom wall and

602
00:24:50,520 --> 00:24:52,560
Speaker 3: it keeps me awake. Over the past few months, she

603
00:24:52,560 --> 00:24:55,800
Speaker 3: has begun disroviding this rule, especially on weekend mornings when

604
00:24:55,840 --> 00:24:58,959
Speaker 3: I prefer to sleep in. The most recent incident happened

605
00:24:58,960 --> 00:25:00,840
Speaker 3: this past weekend. One of my partner and I both

606
00:25:00,840 --> 00:25:02,520
Speaker 3: had the day off and we're trying to sleep in.

607
00:25:02,720 --> 00:25:04,160
Speaker 3: I got up to get some water, and my room

608
00:25:04,240 --> 00:25:06,840
Speaker 3: up was making breakfast. She said she would be starting

609
00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:08,560
Speaker 3: the driver soon and added that I would be the

610
00:25:08,640 --> 00:25:11,000
Speaker 3: only one bothered by it. That statement made it clear

611
00:25:11,080 --> 00:25:14,119
Speaker 3: she did not care whether I got back sleep or not,

612
00:25:14,400 --> 00:25:16,040
Speaker 3: despite the rule we had agreed on.

613
00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:19,240
Speaker 2: Again, I feel like whenever you say rule, she goes,

614
00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:21,480
Speaker 2: uh ah, that doesn't sound like a rule, sounds like

615
00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:22,560
Speaker 2: something I'm gonna do.

616
00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:25,840
Speaker 3: Yeah. The final issue, and the one that has been

617
00:25:25,840 --> 00:25:28,720
Speaker 3: eating at me the most over the past couple of weeks,

618
00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:32,199
Speaker 3: happened around New Year's The cat thing would absolutely I.

619
00:25:32,960 --> 00:25:35,320
Speaker 2: Mean I would have drawn the line a long time ago,

620
00:25:35,520 --> 00:25:37,840
Speaker 2: but when it comes to my pet and it's not

621
00:25:37,880 --> 00:25:39,560
Speaker 2: being fed or being taken care of.

622
00:25:40,000 --> 00:25:43,880
Speaker 3: I got sick with a fairly serious upper respiratory illness

623
00:25:43,920 --> 00:25:45,720
Speaker 3: on New Year's Eve. As soon as I felt a

624
00:25:45,800 --> 00:25:48,239
Speaker 3: tick on my throat, I told her. She decided that

625
00:25:48,280 --> 00:25:50,600
Speaker 3: she and her boyfriend would be spending the entirety of

626
00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:55,000
Speaker 3: the holidays in my house, two full weeks with no

627
00:25:55,119 --> 00:25:57,719
Speaker 3: breaks and no conversation about it. I let it go

628
00:25:57,800 --> 00:26:00,000
Speaker 3: at the time because I did not want to be screwed,

629
00:26:00,320 --> 00:26:03,119
Speaker 3: but I know now that I should not have a

630
00:26:03,160 --> 00:26:05,960
Speaker 3: Few days later, she also got sick. Then she sent

631
00:26:06,040 --> 00:26:08,440
Speaker 3: me a long message explaining that I should not spend

632
00:26:08,440 --> 00:26:10,880
Speaker 3: time in the living room when I'm sick. She justified

633
00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:13,240
Speaker 3: this by saying that she stayed in her room when

634
00:26:13,280 --> 00:26:15,960
Speaker 3: I had the VID, and that's why I did not

635
00:26:16,040 --> 00:26:18,520
Speaker 3: get sick. At that point, I lost my patience. I

636
00:26:18,560 --> 00:26:21,800
Speaker 3: told her this was totally inappropriate and uncalled for. I

637
00:26:21,840 --> 00:26:23,960
Speaker 3: reminded her that I gave her a warning, and I

638
00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:27,000
Speaker 3: made it clear I would not be quarantining myself to

639
00:26:27,119 --> 00:26:29,560
Speaker 3: my bedroom because this is my home and I deserve

640
00:26:29,640 --> 00:26:32,119
Speaker 3: to be comfortable while I'm sick. She never responded to

641
00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:34,840
Speaker 3: that message, and I never received an apology for the

642
00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:39,119
Speaker 3: massive overstepping of boundaries. So Reddit, I generally want to know.

643
00:26:39,359 --> 00:26:41,679
Speaker 3: Am I the a hole here? Am I overreacting to

644
00:26:41,720 --> 00:26:44,359
Speaker 3: the dishonesty and lack of respect? Am I supposed to

645
00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:46,280
Speaker 3: lock myself in my bedroom when I'm sick? Am I

646
00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:49,120
Speaker 3: supposed to lose sleep because of the driver situation? Honestly,

647
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:52,000
Speaker 3: do not know why this is happening. That's why I'm

648
00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:54,000
Speaker 3: asking we have an update. Update.

649
00:26:54,480 --> 00:26:57,320
Speaker 2: You're not the alem the only a hole here to

650
00:26:57,359 --> 00:26:59,200
Speaker 2: help me, and she's an a hole. Your roommate think

651
00:26:59,240 --> 00:27:01,359
Speaker 2: you've been an ahole to yourself. You've been letting this

652
00:27:01,480 --> 00:27:03,080
Speaker 2: go on for so long.

653
00:27:03,400 --> 00:27:03,640
Speaker 3: Yep.

654
00:27:03,800 --> 00:27:06,840
Speaker 2: You kept making like you kept having conversations and saying

655
00:27:06,920 --> 00:27:09,240
Speaker 2: like there are rules. I feel like after the first

656
00:27:09,240 --> 00:27:12,639
Speaker 2: two times she did this and disrespected you, you should

657
00:27:12,640 --> 00:27:14,440
Speaker 2: have been like, if you do one more time, you're out.

658
00:27:14,520 --> 00:27:16,560
Speaker 2: I don't care. You kind of an a hole for

659
00:27:16,960 --> 00:27:19,280
Speaker 2: to yourself, OPI, that's about it. I feel like once

660
00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:21,560
Speaker 2: you should have put your foot down a long time ago.

661
00:27:21,720 --> 00:27:23,119
Speaker 2: I know you were trying to be a good person,

662
00:27:23,240 --> 00:27:25,600
Speaker 2: a good friend. What have you? She didn't do that.

663
00:27:25,840 --> 00:27:28,560
Speaker 3: She literally doesn't care. It's sad. What do you think

664
00:27:28,600 --> 00:27:31,040
Speaker 3: the update is gonna be? She gone think so?

665
00:27:31,320 --> 00:27:31,840
Speaker 2: I hope? So?

666
00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:33,120
Speaker 3: You think Opie kicks her out?

667
00:27:33,240 --> 00:27:33,959
Speaker 2: I really hope so.

668
00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:35,840
Speaker 3: But that you hope what's actually gonna happen?

669
00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:38,760
Speaker 2: Though? The most dramatic thing is that the roommate now

670
00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:41,080
Speaker 2: has turned it upside down for op and now she

671
00:27:41,640 --> 00:27:47,240
Speaker 2: controls the building like the mobile home. Yeah, golly, no,

672
00:27:47,359 --> 00:27:49,320
Speaker 2: I think she's will come on. She pished better be out.

673
00:27:49,359 --> 00:27:52,560
Speaker 2: There's gonna be a huge cat fight and like things

674
00:27:52,600 --> 00:27:55,120
Speaker 2: aren't gonna go well, but OP is gonna get her

675
00:27:55,760 --> 00:27:56,639
Speaker 2: her peace and quiet.

676
00:27:56,720 --> 00:28:00,760
Speaker 3: I like it. Update. Roommate has been m for two

677
00:28:00,840 --> 00:28:03,800
Speaker 3: days now, but I have a lease with a hard

678
00:28:03,920 --> 00:28:06,480
Speaker 3: seased date for her last semester of school. It is

679
00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:10,200
Speaker 3: a technical field, so she should be placed upon graduation.

680
00:28:10,560 --> 00:28:13,240
Speaker 3: In addition, the boyfriend is no longer welcome unless it's

681
00:28:13,280 --> 00:28:15,959
Speaker 3: on a Saturday, and whether he stays overnight depends on

682
00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:19,560
Speaker 3: whether I give approval beforehand. She also cannot use the

683
00:28:19,640 --> 00:28:22,480
Speaker 3: driver when I'm sleeping. She either waits or takes it

684
00:28:22,520 --> 00:28:25,160
Speaker 3: to a laundromat. I do not care. I have learned

685
00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:28,720
Speaker 3: that documenting issues matters, that I need to be more assertive,

686
00:28:28,920 --> 00:28:31,560
Speaker 3: and that is completely within my rights to make someone

687
00:28:31,680 --> 00:28:34,679
Speaker 3: uncomfortable to protect the peace in my own home. So

688
00:28:34,800 --> 00:28:36,959
Speaker 3: thank y'all. Hello, Good for UOP.

689
00:28:37,160 --> 00:28:41,200
Speaker 2: Yay. I guess she's not gone just yet. I feel

690
00:28:41,240 --> 00:28:45,240
Speaker 2: like this is the last warning, last straw for UOP. Good.

691
00:28:45,440 --> 00:28:48,680
Speaker 2: She's abiding by the rules finally, and I think if

692
00:28:48,720 --> 00:28:52,720
Speaker 2: she breaks that rule, she's gone. But I guess you're

693
00:28:53,200 --> 00:28:55,920
Speaker 2: You're more generous and gracious than I would be, So

694
00:28:56,080 --> 00:28:58,720
Speaker 2: good on you for that op, but hopefully it never

695
00:28:58,760 --> 00:28:59,320
Speaker 2: happens again.

696
00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:02,560
Speaker 3: Yeah. Oh, that sounds tough, But we got another story

697
00:29:02,560 --> 00:29:03,040
Speaker 3: for you, guys.

698
00:29:03,720 --> 00:29:06,120
Speaker 2: They said not to live with your closest friends, and

699
00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:10,200
Speaker 2: it was right. Oh no, so I signed a lease

700
00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:12,360
Speaker 2: with two of my childhood friends toward the beginning of

701
00:29:12,440 --> 00:29:14,520
Speaker 2: the year. Let me tell you, when they say not

702
00:29:14,560 --> 00:29:18,080
Speaker 2: to live with your close friends, do not do it.

703
00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:21,400
Speaker 2: I genuinely wish I had listened. By the way, this

704
00:29:21,480 --> 00:29:24,160
Speaker 2: comes from user Whole Situation ninety eight seventy eight. And

705
00:29:24,160 --> 00:29:25,560
Speaker 2: if you want to meet your own stories, go to

706
00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:27,440
Speaker 2: the rur slash Okay story time, sup rerid it. I'm

707
00:29:27,480 --> 00:29:29,480
Speaker 2: key on, I am Riley, and we're here to give

708
00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:32,400
Speaker 2: good advice. Goofily. We only know what we do, guys,

709
00:29:32,440 --> 00:29:34,880
Speaker 2: so let us know what you do in the comments. Please.

710
00:29:35,040 --> 00:29:37,320
Speaker 2: You probably not to live with your friends as a roommate.

711
00:29:37,520 --> 00:29:38,480
Speaker 2: Yeah did you know that?

712
00:29:38,600 --> 00:29:41,760
Speaker 3: Well I'm living with them, so me too. Yikes.

713
00:29:41,880 --> 00:29:44,120
Speaker 1: Hey's John og host. We're gonna get back to the stories,

714
00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:46,360
Speaker 1: but a quick three minute break of ads from our sponsors.

715
00:29:46,600 --> 00:29:49,680
Speaker 2: Well, we'll refer to them as roommate one are one

716
00:29:49,760 --> 00:29:51,320
Speaker 2: and roommate two as R two.

717
00:29:51,600 --> 00:29:53,800
Speaker 3: No, no, no, we're not doing that.

718
00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:58,840
Speaker 2: Uh. Roommate one Rebecca. Let's go with like Bob, these

719
00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:02,320
Speaker 2: are women. Did they say I didn't get any Lisa.

720
00:30:02,200 --> 00:30:09,680
Speaker 3: Lisa RABC Lisa and who Lisa and Renee Renee got it?

721
00:30:10,120 --> 00:30:14,360
Speaker 2: Lisa's roommate one, Renee roommate two, So we'll refer to

722
00:30:14,440 --> 00:30:18,920
Speaker 2: them as roommate Lisa and roommate Renee. Renee is the

723
00:30:18,920 --> 00:30:21,360
Speaker 2: one that both Lisa and I have had issues with

724
00:30:21,480 --> 00:30:24,480
Speaker 2: since the lease started. From the beginning, it became clear

725
00:30:24,560 --> 00:30:26,360
Speaker 2: that what she was going to be the main source

726
00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:29,120
Speaker 2: of tension in the apartment. The main issue with Renee

727
00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:33,920
Speaker 2: have been general cleanliness, communication problems, and constantly evading responsibility

728
00:30:34,040 --> 00:30:36,000
Speaker 2: since she was little. She grew up in a house

729
00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:38,000
Speaker 2: that was always in a state of clutter and chaos

730
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:40,440
Speaker 2: every time I went there. She also has struggled with

731
00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:43,239
Speaker 2: maintaining good personal hygiene for most of her life. And

732
00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:45,080
Speaker 2: you thought I can live with this person?

733
00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:48,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, weird? Why why did we agree to this?

734
00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:52,959
Speaker 2: Oof? I share a bathroom with Renee? No, that's going

735
00:30:53,040 --> 00:30:56,200
Speaker 2: to be gross. Uh. And from the beginning of our

736
00:30:56,280 --> 00:30:58,800
Speaker 2: lease in early May to the first time I asked

737
00:30:58,840 --> 00:31:01,520
Speaker 2: her to switch off cleaning the bathroom, in early September.

738
00:31:01,560 --> 00:31:05,040
Speaker 2: The bathroom was cleaned only by me. Not once did

739
00:31:05,080 --> 00:31:07,320
Speaker 2: she take initiative or offer to help during that time.

740
00:31:07,520 --> 00:31:10,080
Speaker 3: Dude, I'm so glad I have my own bathroom. It

741
00:31:10,200 --> 00:31:12,080
Speaker 3: is so nice because I get to clean it when

742
00:31:12,120 --> 00:31:13,600
Speaker 3: I want to clean it, and I don't have to

743
00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:14,240
Speaker 3: worry about.

744
00:31:14,080 --> 00:31:17,000
Speaker 2: That the same. But I do keep my bathroom pretty clean.

745
00:31:17,200 --> 00:31:17,600
Speaker 3: That's good.

746
00:31:17,960 --> 00:31:19,800
Speaker 2: I'm not a neat freak, and when I was younger,

747
00:31:19,840 --> 00:31:22,520
Speaker 2: I struggled to find motivation to clean. However, when I

748
00:31:22,560 --> 00:31:24,840
Speaker 2: lived in an apartment during college, my roommates and I

749
00:31:24,880 --> 00:31:27,160
Speaker 2: created a cleaning schedule. I got used to cleaning the

750
00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:30,440
Speaker 2: bathroom every other week, and all I asked for Renee

751
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:34,240
Speaker 2: was help with basic things like wiping down the counters, mirror,

752
00:31:34,440 --> 00:31:37,640
Speaker 2: and the toilet bowl. Some wanted be overwhelming. Later, Renee

753
00:31:37,720 --> 00:31:40,200
Speaker 2: didn't respond to my message that entire day, so I

754
00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:42,960
Speaker 2: sent a follow up the next morning and just said hello.

755
00:31:43,320 --> 00:31:45,840
Speaker 2: She responded by saying she was already having enough trouble

756
00:31:45,920 --> 00:31:48,840
Speaker 2: keeping her room clean, cleaning her half of the sink

757
00:31:48,920 --> 00:31:51,520
Speaker 2: that we share, and that she couldn't commit to regular

758
00:31:51,600 --> 00:31:55,800
Speaker 2: cleaning the bathroom. So you say, hmm, I'm gonna lock

759
00:31:55,880 --> 00:31:58,440
Speaker 2: that bathroom. Whenever I leave and use it, you can

760
00:31:58,480 --> 00:32:01,680
Speaker 2: go outside and use that as a bathroom like Riley does.

761
00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:04,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's not that bad. I had to do that

762
00:32:04,320 --> 00:32:04,960
Speaker 3: for a while.

763
00:32:04,800 --> 00:32:06,640
Speaker 2: Before we moved in. The three of us met up

764
00:32:06,680 --> 00:32:10,560
Speaker 2: to discuss expectations. Knowing her history with clutter and her habits,

765
00:32:10,640 --> 00:32:14,120
Speaker 2: I specifically brought up not leaving unnecessary clutter in shared spaces.

766
00:32:14,360 --> 00:32:15,760
Speaker 3: Yup, that's a big one for me too.

767
00:32:16,040 --> 00:32:18,720
Speaker 2: I also suggested a chor chart since we had one

768
00:32:18,720 --> 00:32:21,120
Speaker 2: in my college apartment, and she asked us to hold

769
00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:24,080
Speaker 2: her accountable. When I reminded her of this, she claimed

770
00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:27,280
Speaker 2: we only talked about clutter. She also claimed she wasn't

771
00:32:27,320 --> 00:32:30,760
Speaker 2: unnecessarily taking up space, which wasn't true because she had

772
00:32:30,840 --> 00:32:34,440
Speaker 2: boxes of bins lining the wall outside her room and

773
00:32:34,600 --> 00:32:36,920
Speaker 2: in the dining area since the beginning of the lease.

774
00:32:37,120 --> 00:32:40,200
Speaker 2: Oh heck, if it's that, If it's that bad, I

775
00:32:40,240 --> 00:32:43,440
Speaker 2: don't care. I'm grabbing it and I'm throwing not throwing it,

776
00:32:43,480 --> 00:32:45,080
Speaker 2: but I am putting it in your room for you

777
00:32:45,200 --> 00:32:45,720
Speaker 2: to figure out.

778
00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:47,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, we have some stuff that's kind of out and

779
00:32:47,440 --> 00:32:50,480
Speaker 3: about in our apartment. We're down to one box. I

780
00:32:50,480 --> 00:32:53,920
Speaker 3: had a conversation we have one box left. Nice, We're close.

781
00:32:54,360 --> 00:32:58,880
Speaker 2: If I'm playing literal like Legens of the Hidden Temple,

782
00:32:59,000 --> 00:33:00,840
Speaker 2: or like I have to do an obstacle course a

783
00:33:00,920 --> 00:33:04,520
Speaker 2: Ninja Warrior in my own living space and it's your

784
00:33:04,600 --> 00:33:06,840
Speaker 2: stuff that is the obstacle, I'll give you a couple

785
00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:09,120
Speaker 2: days to like figure it out, but that's about it.

786
00:33:09,160 --> 00:33:11,760
Speaker 2: I'm not waiting the whole month or week.

787
00:33:12,120 --> 00:33:13,560
Speaker 3: On video games to night. That's what I'm gonna do.

788
00:33:13,720 --> 00:33:14,640
Speaker 2: Good for you, follow up.

789
00:33:14,760 --> 00:33:17,080
Speaker 3: I've been playing for all that four go help you settlements.

790
00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:19,560
Speaker 2: We all agreed early on that personal spaces could be

791
00:33:19,640 --> 00:33:23,440
Speaker 2: kept however we wanted, but common spaces needed to stay clean.

792
00:33:23,720 --> 00:33:26,920
Speaker 2: Despite this, Renee has left dishes either in or around

793
00:33:26,920 --> 00:33:30,640
Speaker 2: the sink to rot, gross and groll mold several times

794
00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:34,800
Speaker 2: since we moved in gross Oh. I would again take

795
00:33:34,840 --> 00:33:38,200
Speaker 2: those dishes and put it in her room. Lisa is pregnant,

796
00:33:38,280 --> 00:33:40,960
Speaker 2: so you can imagine how frustrated we were that Renee

797
00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:43,840
Speaker 2: would rather risk her health than clean her dishes. Every

798
00:33:43,840 --> 00:33:46,640
Speaker 2: time she was confronted about dirty dishes, she made excuses

799
00:33:46,680 --> 00:33:49,600
Speaker 2: about being busy or brought up past arguments. Once she

800
00:33:49,680 --> 00:33:53,400
Speaker 2: realized she had no valid defense accountability was never part

801
00:33:53,480 --> 00:33:55,360
Speaker 2: of the conversation for her.

802
00:33:56,320 --> 00:33:58,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, that gets a lot of people. That's a horror.

803
00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:00,000
Speaker 3: It's a hard one for people.

804
00:34:00,640 --> 00:34:03,800
Speaker 2: Oh boy, here we go. Another major issue has been

805
00:34:04,160 --> 00:34:05,200
Speaker 2: Renee's dog.

806
00:34:05,440 --> 00:34:08,000
Speaker 3: No, she has a dog. No, are you sure?

807
00:34:08,040 --> 00:34:11,640
Speaker 2: It's just not a clutter monster built over time with

808
00:34:11,760 --> 00:34:14,560
Speaker 2: mold and fung eye. She got an emotional support animal

809
00:34:14,600 --> 00:34:17,200
Speaker 2: near the beginning of the lease, and since I love dogs,

810
00:34:17,320 --> 00:34:20,520
Speaker 2: I had no issue signing the consent form. However, the

811
00:34:20,600 --> 00:34:24,320
Speaker 2: dog has severe separation anxiety and barks whenever she can't

812
00:34:24,360 --> 00:34:25,200
Speaker 2: see Renee.

813
00:34:26,600 --> 00:34:28,839
Speaker 3: So no, it's codependent.

814
00:34:29,280 --> 00:34:32,680
Speaker 2: Are you sure she was the essay or the dog

815
00:34:32,760 --> 00:34:36,360
Speaker 2: was the essay? Because this dog has so much anxiety.

816
00:34:35,960 --> 00:34:37,239
Speaker 3: They're feeding off of each other.

817
00:34:37,560 --> 00:34:40,560
Speaker 2: Yeah. Because of this, she almost always brought the dog

818
00:34:40,640 --> 00:34:43,040
Speaker 2: into the bathroom with her. One time, she left the

819
00:34:43,040 --> 00:34:45,480
Speaker 2: trash can on my side of the sink, right next

820
00:34:45,520 --> 00:34:47,839
Speaker 2: to my toothbrush to keep the dog out of it.

821
00:34:47,920 --> 00:34:50,359
Speaker 2: The trash had feminine hygiene products in it, and there

822
00:34:50,440 --> 00:34:52,840
Speaker 2: is a large linen closet in the bathroom that she

823
00:34:52,880 --> 00:34:56,680
Speaker 2: could have used instead, so it completely grossed me out.

824
00:34:57,000 --> 00:34:59,360
Speaker 2: This may have been petty, but after being ignored repeatedly,

825
00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:02,080
Speaker 2: whenever I tried communicate, I moved the trash can under

826
00:35:02,120 --> 00:35:04,840
Speaker 2: the sink. This caused a massive blow up. She started

827
00:35:04,840 --> 00:35:07,440
Speaker 2: the conversation by saying, sorry, I left the trash on

828
00:35:07,480 --> 00:35:10,200
Speaker 2: the sink one effing time doesn't mean you need to

829
00:35:10,239 --> 00:35:12,520
Speaker 2: hide it from me like an effing child. It's a

830
00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:14,520
Speaker 2: trash can going under the sink. All you have to

831
00:35:14,560 --> 00:35:17,840
Speaker 2: do is open it, open, open the tiny door. Also,

832
00:35:17,920 --> 00:35:21,240
Speaker 2: it's because you bring your dog in the bathroom, numb nuts.

833
00:35:21,239 --> 00:35:23,600
Speaker 3: Oh, that's even worse in the shared bathroom.

834
00:35:23,840 --> 00:35:27,280
Speaker 2: Ah. And while doing this, she was calling me multiple

835
00:35:27,360 --> 00:35:30,640
Speaker 2: names and insulting me. I told her it wasn't hidden,

836
00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:33,399
Speaker 2: it was just moved, and said she was the one

837
00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:36,479
Speaker 2: being childish for never communicating. The argument turned into who

838
00:35:36,520 --> 00:35:38,840
Speaker 2: was responsible for taking out the trash? Let me guess

839
00:35:39,080 --> 00:35:41,200
Speaker 2: you are, because she never does it. I explained that

840
00:35:41,239 --> 00:35:43,600
Speaker 2: in my experience, if the trash is full, you take

841
00:35:43,640 --> 00:35:46,600
Speaker 2: it out. The bathroom trash was overflowing because she had

842
00:35:46,640 --> 00:35:49,279
Speaker 2: put several contact cases in it. Her response was that

843
00:35:49,320 --> 00:35:51,759
Speaker 2: since it had a lot of feminine hygiene products in it,

844
00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:55,200
Speaker 2: it should have been my responsibility. Because she flushes hers.

845
00:35:55,600 --> 00:35:58,120
Speaker 2: During this argument, a pan that could been sitting out

846
00:35:58,120 --> 00:36:00,319
Speaker 2: on the counter for over a week was brought up.

847
00:36:00,400 --> 00:36:03,120
Speaker 2: The pan belonged to Lisa, and Renee had put it

848
00:36:03,160 --> 00:36:06,799
Speaker 2: away dirty, ruining it. She never apologized or acknowledged it.

849
00:36:06,880 --> 00:36:09,640
Speaker 2: When Lisa confronted her, Renee said she hadn't tried to

850
00:36:09,640 --> 00:36:11,760
Speaker 2: clean it yet and that she fully intended to replace

851
00:36:11,800 --> 00:36:14,479
Speaker 2: it if it was ruined, yet never apologized or offered

852
00:36:14,480 --> 00:36:17,080
Speaker 2: to replace it on her own. That argument somehow turned

853
00:36:17,120 --> 00:36:19,960
Speaker 2: into her accusing me never being home and prioritizing my

854
00:36:20,000 --> 00:36:23,080
Speaker 2: boyfriend over my friends. I believe that as an adult,

855
00:36:23,200 --> 00:36:25,360
Speaker 2: your partner should be a priority. I think part of

856
00:36:25,360 --> 00:36:28,240
Speaker 2: her resentment comes from her own relationship, as her boyfriend

857
00:36:28,280 --> 00:36:30,839
Speaker 2: really comes over and does not seem to prioritize her.

858
00:36:31,160 --> 00:36:33,839
Speaker 2: I also wonder why he's not coming over because her

859
00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:35,520
Speaker 2: room is an effing pigpen.

860
00:36:36,040 --> 00:36:36,640
Speaker 3: Yeah.

861
00:36:36,680 --> 00:36:38,960
Speaker 2: The issues with her dog continued. The dog has had

862
00:36:39,000 --> 00:36:41,960
Speaker 2: several accidents in the apartment. At first, she would text

863
00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:44,319
Speaker 2: Lisa and me warning us if there was a wet

864
00:36:44,320 --> 00:36:46,680
Speaker 2: spot in a common area. One day, the dog peed

865
00:36:46,760 --> 00:36:47,520
Speaker 2: on my bath mat.

866
00:36:47,640 --> 00:36:50,560
Speaker 3: No, that's gross, No more dog.

867
00:36:50,840 --> 00:36:54,359
Speaker 2: That bath mat is also in the trash. Renee told

868
00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:55,759
Speaker 2: me about it and said she would throw it in

869
00:36:55,800 --> 00:36:58,839
Speaker 2: the washer, followed by drying instructions just in case there

870
00:36:58,920 --> 00:37:02,200
Speaker 2: was no apology. That night, the mat still hadn't come back,

871
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:04,000
Speaker 2: so I used one of my towels to draw my

872
00:37:04,040 --> 00:37:06,160
Speaker 2: feet and hung it over the shower rod. Over the

873
00:37:06,200 --> 00:37:08,640
Speaker 2: next few days, there were two occasions where that towel

874
00:37:08,719 --> 00:37:11,400
Speaker 2: ended up on the sink. Gross. The second time it

875
00:37:11,440 --> 00:37:14,080
Speaker 2: was placed directly on top of my toothbrush and my

876
00:37:14,280 --> 00:37:15,960
Speaker 2: boyfriend's toothbrush.

877
00:37:16,160 --> 00:37:18,560
Speaker 3: Are you serious? Are you freaking serious?

878
00:37:18,600 --> 00:37:19,880
Speaker 2: She's doing this on purpose?

879
00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:21,000
Speaker 3: A monster.

880
00:37:21,719 --> 00:37:24,680
Speaker 2: I sent a message expressing frustration, asking me her to

881
00:37:24,719 --> 00:37:26,719
Speaker 2: stop putting the towel on the sink, and mentioning that

882
00:37:26,800 --> 00:37:29,719
Speaker 2: my mat still hadn't been returned. She responds with that

883
00:37:29,760 --> 00:37:31,719
Speaker 2: she was busy and that I could have just as

884
00:37:31,719 --> 00:37:34,640
Speaker 2: easily gotten that mat myself. I explained that the issue

885
00:37:34,680 --> 00:37:37,720
Speaker 2: was her dog peeing on my belongings and her refusal

886
00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:41,319
Speaker 2: to take accountability or apologize. She said washing it was

887
00:37:41,360 --> 00:37:44,200
Speaker 2: taking responsibility and that she wasn't going to apologize because

888
00:37:44,200 --> 00:37:46,360
Speaker 2: the dog had an accident. Her claim of being busy

889
00:37:46,640 --> 00:37:48,960
Speaker 2: wasn't true. She and her boyfriend were home most of

890
00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:51,120
Speaker 2: the previous day, and when I came back. She was

891
00:37:51,160 --> 00:37:53,440
Speaker 2: playing with her dog in the living room. I told

892
00:37:53,480 --> 00:37:57,080
Speaker 2: her to stop unnecessarily touching my things. A few days later,

893
00:37:57,200 --> 00:37:59,080
Speaker 2: I found another pant she had left in the sink

894
00:37:59,160 --> 00:38:03,440
Speaker 2: for weeks with oil and floating food chunks. I moved

895
00:38:03,440 --> 00:38:05,920
Speaker 2: it into the wagon she keeps outside her door because

896
00:38:05,920 --> 00:38:08,719
Speaker 2: I refuse to let mold grow in a sink I use.

897
00:38:09,200 --> 00:38:12,920
Speaker 2: She came out, it was my Yeah, that was my

898
00:38:12,920 --> 00:38:16,040
Speaker 2: my telling, like you should. You should put all her dirty,

899
00:38:16,160 --> 00:38:18,839
Speaker 2: dirty pans and her dirty dishes in her room.

900
00:38:19,120 --> 00:38:21,520
Speaker 3: Fair, that's that's where they go. You don't do them.

901
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:25,560
Speaker 2: She came out, yelling, in your words, stop touching my crap.

902
00:38:25,719 --> 00:38:27,440
Speaker 2: I told her to stop leaving moldy dishes in the

903
00:38:27,480 --> 00:38:30,080
Speaker 2: sink instead of cleaning it. She reused my words against

904
00:38:30,160 --> 00:38:32,000
Speaker 2: me and said she was done trying to prove a

905
00:38:32,040 --> 00:38:33,960
Speaker 2: point to someone who thinks they're never wrong.

906
00:38:34,040 --> 00:38:36,239
Speaker 3: Okay, well then just leave, just move out, and can't

907
00:38:36,320 --> 00:38:36,960
Speaker 3: keep doing this.

908
00:38:37,280 --> 00:38:40,360
Speaker 2: I have apologized in situations where I felt it was necessary.

909
00:38:40,480 --> 00:38:43,319
Speaker 2: She has never once apologized or acknowledged her behavior. It

910
00:38:43,400 --> 00:38:45,839
Speaker 2: often takes multiple texts just to get a response from her,

911
00:38:45,920 --> 00:38:50,200
Speaker 2: and she constantly hides behind saying she's bad a communication.

912
00:38:49,840 --> 00:38:53,120
Speaker 3: Easy money. I just don't understand why people are so

913
00:38:53,239 --> 00:38:56,319
Speaker 3: difficult to live with. And I guess she's your close friend.

914
00:38:56,320 --> 00:38:58,359
Speaker 3: But if you kind of see you see that cone

915
00:38:58,360 --> 00:38:59,399
Speaker 3: around the corner.

916
00:38:59,080 --> 00:39:01,640
Speaker 2: If you saw this, if you saw how she lived

917
00:39:01,680 --> 00:39:04,200
Speaker 2: and you thought, hmmm, she could change, right, I think

918
00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:06,279
Speaker 2: that's a little bit on both you and Lisa. I'm

919
00:39:06,320 --> 00:39:09,000
Speaker 2: not gonna lie. Yeah, but at the end of the day,

920
00:39:09,200 --> 00:39:12,200
Speaker 2: also very disgusting. I had a roommate like this. We

921
00:39:12,280 --> 00:39:14,560
Speaker 2: tried to get him off the lease. We couldn't. We couldn't.

922
00:39:14,600 --> 00:39:16,680
Speaker 2: It was it was a mutual assigned lease and the

923
00:39:16,719 --> 00:39:19,040
Speaker 2: only the landlord was like, we can't get him off

924
00:39:19,080 --> 00:39:20,719
Speaker 2: the we can't get him off the lease. He's like,

925
00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:24,040
Speaker 2: I also agree, he's he's a pig pen. His room's

926
00:39:24,040 --> 00:39:27,040
Speaker 2: a mess. He's caused me so much frustration. But it's

927
00:39:27,080 --> 00:39:30,440
Speaker 2: a contract. The least says the only person who is

928
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:33,520
Speaker 2: responsible moving out is that person, like he has to

929
00:39:33,560 --> 00:39:36,280
Speaker 2: say he wants to move out. It was five roommates,

930
00:39:36,280 --> 00:39:38,319
Speaker 2: by the way, Christian was one of them. We said,

931
00:39:38,360 --> 00:39:40,719
Speaker 2: we don't want you to live here anymore. Where Arizona

932
00:39:41,040 --> 00:39:43,759
Speaker 2: during college, oh God, And we asked him, could you

933
00:39:43,760 --> 00:39:45,640
Speaker 2: please move out, like we just we don't want to

934
00:39:45,680 --> 00:39:48,640
Speaker 2: deal with you anymore. Because of that, he was like, no, no,

935
00:39:48,920 --> 00:39:50,800
Speaker 2: I'll be petty. I like living here. And we're like

936
00:39:50,840 --> 00:39:52,560
Speaker 2: we don't like living with you being a pig pen,

937
00:39:52,680 --> 00:39:53,640
Speaker 2: and he's like, I don't care.

938
00:39:53,880 --> 00:39:55,120
Speaker 3: Horrible, I'd be in.

939
00:39:55,200 --> 00:39:57,279
Speaker 2: All I did was like, all right, I will lock

940
00:39:57,520 --> 00:40:00,359
Speaker 2: my door upstairs. You can't come upstairs. We have our

941
00:40:00,360 --> 00:40:02,239
Speaker 2: own bathroom. I will use the sink when I need to.

942
00:40:02,400 --> 00:40:04,440
Speaker 2: I got my own mini fridge. It was bad. It

943
00:40:04,480 --> 00:40:06,200
Speaker 2: was a really bad, Like you go into his room,

944
00:40:06,239 --> 00:40:08,960
Speaker 2: You're like, dude, what is that odor? It's like, what

945
00:40:09,040 --> 00:40:10,960
Speaker 2: is that liquid in the corner? What is that?

946
00:40:11,960 --> 00:40:14,600
Speaker 3: I had to clean the most disgusting room in college.

947
00:40:14,640 --> 00:40:15,120
Speaker 3: I was an RA.

948
00:40:15,520 --> 00:40:18,000
Speaker 2: You were an RA. Yeah forgetting that you were an RA.

949
00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:18,720
Speaker 2: That's crazy.

950
00:40:18,760 --> 00:40:20,879
Speaker 3: For one year, yeah, it paid for like my room

951
00:40:20,880 --> 00:40:21,200
Speaker 3: and board.

952
00:40:21,280 --> 00:40:21,719
Speaker 2: That makes sense.

953
00:40:21,800 --> 00:40:23,760
Speaker 3: So I was like, okay, but I did that and

954
00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:27,360
Speaker 3: there's just one room completely filled trash. It was horrible.

955
00:40:27,480 --> 00:40:29,080
Speaker 3: They were like, you guys want to help clean it?

956
00:40:29,080 --> 00:40:31,200
Speaker 3: And I was like, why not. I want to experience

957
00:40:31,440 --> 00:40:34,680
Speaker 3: first mistake. It's horrible, dude, chocolate milk, oh, it's probably

958
00:40:34,800 --> 00:40:36,520
Speaker 3: oh yeah, that's all I gotta say.

959
00:40:36,560 --> 00:40:40,160
Speaker 2: He's bad, uh OPI at this point in time, you

960
00:40:40,280 --> 00:40:42,600
Speaker 2: just got to have failsafes of like all right, cool,

961
00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:44,879
Speaker 2: I'll just keep talking, like if you're gonna leave moldy things,

962
00:40:44,920 --> 00:40:47,080
Speaker 2: I'm gonna throw it away. Yeah, gotta throw it away

963
00:40:47,120 --> 00:40:47,680
Speaker 2: or what have you?

964
00:40:48,320 --> 00:40:49,120
Speaker 3: Just get rid of it.

965
00:40:49,520 --> 00:40:51,920
Speaker 2: And then if you can't get her out of the

966
00:40:51,920 --> 00:40:54,200
Speaker 2: the least or the apartment, I don't know. I don't know.

967
00:40:54,440 --> 00:40:56,440
Speaker 1: Hey, John og host here, we're gonna get back to

968
00:40:56,440 --> 00:40:58,680
Speaker 1: this episode, but a quick three minute break of ads

969
00:40:58,680 --> 00:41:01,240
Speaker 1: from a sponsor's keeping the show alift leave.

970
00:41:01,360 --> 00:41:03,560
Speaker 2: Let's go, I finish up the story. She claims she

971
00:41:03,600 --> 00:41:05,839
Speaker 2: wants us to express when something is wrong, but when

972
00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:09,960
Speaker 2: we do, it's met with excuses, delays, or deflection.

973
00:41:10,360 --> 00:41:11,560
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh.

974
00:41:11,719 --> 00:41:14,080
Speaker 2: She also claims that because Lisa and I spend nights

975
00:41:14,080 --> 00:41:16,760
Speaker 2: at our boyfriend's places, it feels like it's her apartment,

976
00:41:16,840 --> 00:41:18,600
Speaker 2: so she shouldn't be questioned about messes.

977
00:41:18,840 --> 00:41:19,680
Speaker 3: Shut up.

978
00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:22,960
Speaker 2: At the same time, she got an ESA emotional support

979
00:41:23,040 --> 00:41:25,160
Speaker 2: animal because she didn't want to be alone when we

980
00:41:25,160 --> 00:41:27,759
Speaker 2: weren't there. I genuinely don't know how I'm going to

981
00:41:27,760 --> 00:41:30,919
Speaker 2: survive another four months living with her. I don't even

982
00:41:30,920 --> 00:41:32,600
Speaker 2: know how you get to survive another four months living

983
00:41:32,600 --> 00:41:34,279
Speaker 2: with her. It feels like every single week is a

984
00:41:34,360 --> 00:41:35,400
Speaker 2: new battle comments.

985
00:41:35,960 --> 00:41:38,240
Speaker 3: Maybe I'm good, this is two comments.

986
00:41:38,280 --> 00:41:38,799
Speaker 2: We need them.

987
00:41:38,840 --> 00:41:39,239
Speaker 3: No, it's good.

988
00:41:39,280 --> 00:41:39,839
Speaker 2: I want to read them.

989
00:41:39,880 --> 00:41:41,520
Speaker 3: I don't want to read them. It's a long one.

990
00:41:41,719 --> 00:41:44,799
Speaker 2: I don't know. I would. I would just yeah, don't.

991
00:41:45,400 --> 00:41:47,360
Speaker 3: If you are serious about living with a scroll and

992
00:41:47,480 --> 00:41:49,040
Speaker 3: you're serious about your friendship, it sounds like you guys

993
00:41:49,040 --> 00:41:50,120
Speaker 3: want they don't even have friendship.

994
00:41:50,200 --> 00:41:52,000
Speaker 2: It sounds like your friendship is out the window.

995
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:54,319
Speaker 3: She does not care, she doesn't have respect for you.

996
00:41:54,520 --> 00:41:57,080
Speaker 3: One roommate's pregnant, the other one is just like causing

997
00:41:57,600 --> 00:41:58,920
Speaker 3: so much is not being safe?

998
00:41:59,040 --> 00:42:00,480
Speaker 2: Is a trash t ash heep.

999
00:42:00,920 --> 00:42:02,520
Speaker 3: She doesn't seem to get it out. I would be

1000
00:42:02,560 --> 00:42:04,960
Speaker 3: planning for the next four months. What I would literally

1001
00:42:05,000 --> 00:42:07,480
Speaker 3: do is just cleaner dishes, clean all this stuff, be

1002
00:42:07,680 --> 00:42:10,560
Speaker 3: super nice, clean everything, and then still with it four

1003
00:42:10,560 --> 00:42:13,120
Speaker 3: months to kick her out. I you were no longer invited.

1004
00:42:13,200 --> 00:42:15,560
Speaker 2: I was gonna say, fight fire with fire outgrosser.

1005
00:42:15,840 --> 00:42:17,480
Speaker 3: No, that's not gonna do anything.

1006
00:42:17,520 --> 00:42:21,759
Speaker 2: No one's gonna win here. Everyone Lisa loses, You lose cuclear.

1007
00:42:21,239 --> 00:42:23,120
Speaker 3: Bombs, fight and show nuclear bombs.

1008
00:42:23,160 --> 00:42:25,960
Speaker 2: I don't know. I would just yeah at this point,

1009
00:42:26,360 --> 00:42:28,520
Speaker 2: just like make a rule like, hey, if it's moldy

1010
00:42:28,760 --> 00:42:31,040
Speaker 2: and it if you leave something moldy in the sink,

1011
00:42:31,200 --> 00:42:33,239
Speaker 2: throwing it away or putting in your room, I don't

1012
00:42:33,239 --> 00:42:35,480
Speaker 2: know what. Like if she just keeps afflecting, I don't

1013
00:42:35,480 --> 00:42:38,319
Speaker 2: know what to do. Yeah, I would want her out

1014
00:42:38,680 --> 00:42:41,880
Speaker 2: within the within as soon as possible. Ah.

1015
00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:43,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, that was That was a hard one to read.

1016
00:42:43,680 --> 00:42:46,160
Speaker 3: But guys, that was the other of our roommates stories.

1017
00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:47,439
Speaker 3: Hope you liked them.

1018
00:42:47,480 --> 00:42:49,359
Speaker 2: I hope you have great roommates you can also have.

1019
00:42:49,560 --> 00:42:51,400
Speaker 2: I know it's the thing. You can live with your

1020
00:42:51,640 --> 00:42:55,319
Speaker 2: your friends as roommates as long as they respect you

1021
00:42:55,360 --> 00:42:56,399
Speaker 2: and respect them.

1022
00:42:56,920 --> 00:42:58,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, dude, I feel like me and my roommate are

1023
00:42:59,000 --> 00:42:59,680
Speaker 3: doing pretty well.

1024
00:43:00,040 --> 00:43:03,960
Speaker 2: Ah, the story wid be very triggering.

1025
00:43:04,200 --> 00:43:06,879
Speaker 3: Fair to this. Yeah, we're gonna actually talking soon about

1026
00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:10,080
Speaker 3: a cleaning schedule, me and my roommate. Oh yeah, pretty cute.

1027
00:43:10,080 --> 00:43:11,720
Speaker 3: Have you talked to your roommate about a cleaning schedule?

1028
00:43:11,719 --> 00:43:13,359
Speaker 2: Well, we've got to figure out where we're living first.

1029
00:43:13,360 --> 00:43:14,239
Speaker 3: Are you gonna live with him?

1030
00:43:14,360 --> 00:43:14,920
Speaker 2: Yeah? I have to.

1031
00:43:15,080 --> 00:43:15,880
Speaker 3: I have to have to.

1032
00:43:16,239 --> 00:43:19,080
Speaker 2: That'll have to, but it'll be fine. Sure, yeah, all right,

1033
00:43:19,239 --> 00:43:19,960
Speaker 2: I'm cool with it.

1034
00:43:20,200 --> 00:43:21,880
Speaker 3: Well, if you love us, make sure to subscribe.

1035
00:43:21,880 --> 00:43:23,920
Speaker 2: We love you and see you tomorrow.