1 00:00:01,240 --> 00:00:04,520 Speaker 1: Well now it is time for today's Strawberry Letter, and 2 00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:08,160 Speaker 1: if you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more, 3 00:00:08,520 --> 00:00:11,959 Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve RVFM dot com 4 00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:14,640 Speaker 1: and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your 5 00:00:14,720 --> 00:00:16,960 Speaker 1: letter live on the air, just like we're going to 6 00:00:17,040 --> 00:00:19,639 Speaker 1: read this one right here, right now, and you never 7 00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:24,960 Speaker 1: know it could be yours. Yes, yes, buggle up, hold 8 00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:26,520 Speaker 1: on tight, We got it for you here. It is 9 00:00:26,640 --> 00:00:30,760 Speaker 1: the Strawberry Letter. Thank in Fhe subject my three weight 10 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:34,640 Speaker 1: love affair. Dear Stephen Shirley. I'm a forty year old 11 00:00:34,680 --> 00:00:37,280 Speaker 1: married woman and my husband and I have a sister 12 00:00:37,440 --> 00:00:40,800 Speaker 1: friend that has been a major part of my life 13 00:00:40,840 --> 00:00:44,440 Speaker 1: since I was seven years old. We did everything together, 14 00:00:44,840 --> 00:00:47,879 Speaker 1: even went to college the same college and graduated at 15 00:00:47,880 --> 00:00:50,880 Speaker 1: the same time. When I got engaged, she got engaged. 16 00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:54,840 Speaker 1: Our fiances didn't get along, so my man would always 17 00:00:54,880 --> 00:00:57,400 Speaker 1: take my best decide when she was having an issue 18 00:00:57,480 --> 00:01:00,760 Speaker 1: with her fiance. A few weeks after we got engaged, 19 00:01:01,040 --> 00:01:03,720 Speaker 1: my man told me that my bestie's man was cheating 20 00:01:03,720 --> 00:01:06,199 Speaker 1: on her. I was shocked and hurt when I saw 21 00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:10,600 Speaker 1: the video of her fiance asleep naked over his side 22 00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:13,759 Speaker 1: chick's house. My man and I decided not to tell 23 00:01:13,760 --> 00:01:16,959 Speaker 1: her anything, But then my man got really upset with 24 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:19,440 Speaker 1: the dude and went out and went and told my 25 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:23,919 Speaker 1: bestie about the cheating. She was so devastated she stayed 26 00:01:23,959 --> 00:01:26,759 Speaker 1: with us for two weeks and called off their engagement. 27 00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:29,759 Speaker 1: So now that we're married, she's part of our family. 28 00:01:30,240 --> 00:01:34,000 Speaker 1: She travels with my husband, hubby, and I, and she 29 00:01:34,120 --> 00:01:37,720 Speaker 1: comes for weekly movie nights at her house. She's dating again, 30 00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:41,399 Speaker 1: and when she meets men, she brings them to meet 31 00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:44,320 Speaker 1: us so we can pass judgment on them. I've been 32 00:01:44,400 --> 00:01:47,880 Speaker 1: noticing lately that my husband is more opinionated than usual, 33 00:01:48,160 --> 00:01:50,040 Speaker 1: and none of the guys have been good enough for 34 00:01:50,120 --> 00:01:53,040 Speaker 1: my bestie. That's a red flag for me, so I 35 00:01:53,160 --> 00:01:56,080 Speaker 1: jokingly asked him if he'd liked to clone himself so 36 00:01:56,160 --> 00:01:58,880 Speaker 1: my bestie could be with a man just like him. 37 00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:01,360 Speaker 1: He got very earitate it with me, so I have 38 00:02:01,480 --> 00:02:03,920 Speaker 1: been wondering if something is going on with him in 39 00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:07,480 Speaker 1: my bestie. As a test, I told him that we're 40 00:02:07,520 --> 00:02:10,920 Speaker 1: going on an anniversary trip alone. He said it would 41 00:02:10,919 --> 00:02:14,400 Speaker 1: be weird to leave my bestie out. I asked him 42 00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,600 Speaker 1: if we are in a three way love affair. He 43 00:02:16,720 --> 00:02:19,440 Speaker 1: laughed it off and said, no, but does he really 44 00:02:19,480 --> 00:02:26,760 Speaker 1: care about her feelings? What's going on here? Well, yeah, 45 00:02:26,800 --> 00:02:29,880 Speaker 1: he does care about her feelings, as do you. I 46 00:02:29,919 --> 00:02:32,560 Speaker 1: mean you called her your sister friend. You guys have 47 00:02:32,639 --> 00:02:37,480 Speaker 1: been together since seven years old, So yeah, he cares 48 00:02:37,520 --> 00:02:40,800 Speaker 1: about her for sure. And if you ask me, he's 49 00:02:40,840 --> 00:02:45,280 Speaker 1: certainly acting like a guilty, jealous man when she brings 50 00:02:45,320 --> 00:02:49,200 Speaker 1: other men around. I'm very surprised it took you so 51 00:02:49,240 --> 00:02:51,720 Speaker 1: long to notice a red flag. I think there have 52 00:02:51,840 --> 00:02:55,960 Speaker 1: been several. First, and most importantly, when you guys agree 53 00:02:55,800 --> 00:02:58,119 Speaker 1: and when you and your husband agreed not to tell 54 00:02:58,160 --> 00:03:01,880 Speaker 1: your bestie. He's the one who told about the cheating. 55 00:03:02,720 --> 00:03:05,880 Speaker 1: That's a major riffle. That's not really what men do. 56 00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:11,520 Speaker 1: They don't snitch on each other. Now, he's so concerned 57 00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:14,799 Speaker 1: about her and who she dates. You guys have movie 58 00:03:14,880 --> 00:03:18,120 Speaker 1: nights together and she travels with you. What you're feeling 59 00:03:18,320 --> 00:03:21,480 Speaker 1: is right. You know, it is a three way love affair. 60 00:03:21,800 --> 00:03:24,720 Speaker 1: Who or what couple do you know whose husband can 61 00:03:24,760 --> 00:03:28,000 Speaker 1: be let behave How your husband is behaving about her 62 00:03:28,639 --> 00:03:31,560 Speaker 1: and that there's nothing going on, Just think about that. 63 00:03:32,040 --> 00:03:34,560 Speaker 1: He's doing way too much when it comes to her, 64 00:03:34,639 --> 00:03:37,000 Speaker 1: and you need to check them both. You don't have 65 00:03:37,040 --> 00:03:39,200 Speaker 1: to catch them in the act or anything like that 66 00:03:39,280 --> 00:03:42,720 Speaker 1: to know what's going on. You already suspect them anyway, 67 00:03:42,800 --> 00:03:48,520 Speaker 1: So I say you confront them and get it over with. Steve. Wow, Well, 68 00:03:48,720 --> 00:03:52,600 Speaker 1: it's interesting. It's an interesting letter. I will say this 69 00:03:52,720 --> 00:03:59,360 Speaker 1: about women. Most of the time, what you feel is real. 70 00:04:00,400 --> 00:04:04,720 Speaker 1: Most of the time. It's because God gifted you all 71 00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:07,200 Speaker 1: with this thing called intuition, and he gave it to 72 00:04:07,280 --> 00:04:10,520 Speaker 1: you more than he gave it to men. Women are 73 00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:13,120 Speaker 1: born with it. You should trust it and lean on it. 74 00:04:13,160 --> 00:04:15,640 Speaker 1: So usually what you think or field is usually real. 75 00:04:16,760 --> 00:04:19,240 Speaker 1: You're forty year old, married woman. Your husband and I 76 00:04:19,320 --> 00:04:25,040 Speaker 1: have a sister friend. That's interesting. That's been a major 77 00:04:25,120 --> 00:04:28,839 Speaker 1: part of my life since I was seven. We did 78 00:04:28,880 --> 00:04:33,200 Speaker 1: everything together. This is very important in this whole letter. 79 00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:39,520 Speaker 1: We did everything together. Now pay attention. Y'all even went 80 00:04:39,560 --> 00:04:47,000 Speaker 1: to the same college, graduated at the same time. When 81 00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:54,360 Speaker 1: I got engaged, she got engaged. That's everything. That ass everything. 82 00:04:55,400 --> 00:04:59,000 Speaker 1: Our fiances didn't get along, so my man would always 83 00:04:59,080 --> 00:05:02,400 Speaker 1: take my best side when she was having an issue 84 00:05:02,440 --> 00:05:07,320 Speaker 1: with her fiance. A few weeks after we got engaged, 85 00:05:08,040 --> 00:05:12,159 Speaker 1: my man told me that my bestie's man was cheating 86 00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:16,960 Speaker 1: on her. I was shocked and hurt when I saw 87 00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:22,640 Speaker 1: the video of her fiance asleep naked over his side 88 00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:29,880 Speaker 1: chick's house. Stop, wait a minute, what? Wait a minute. 89 00:05:31,320 --> 00:05:36,320 Speaker 1: You're saying that your man told you that your bestie's 90 00:05:36,440 --> 00:05:40,000 Speaker 1: man was cheating on her, and then right after that 91 00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:42,920 Speaker 1: you said, I'm shocked and hurt when I saw the 92 00:05:43,680 --> 00:05:48,200 Speaker 1: video of her fiance asleep naked over his side, Chick's house. 93 00:05:48,560 --> 00:05:53,039 Speaker 1: Where your man get the video from? Where did your 94 00:05:53,080 --> 00:06:01,520 Speaker 1: man get the video from? Now? Just do some hood logic, Hill. 95 00:06:03,160 --> 00:06:10,440 Speaker 1: One of two things was happening. Either the fiance who 96 00:06:10,680 --> 00:06:17,200 Speaker 1: don't get along, Hello, the fiances that don't get along? 97 00:06:17,640 --> 00:06:23,000 Speaker 1: He gave your husband the video, Like, hey, check me 98 00:06:23,040 --> 00:06:29,080 Speaker 1: out all your husband made the video, labor. Two things 99 00:06:29,080 --> 00:06:36,600 Speaker 1: can happen, ain'ber two things can happen. Hello, Hello, y'all 100 00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:42,240 Speaker 1: do everything again? Hello? All that thought. We'll have part 101 00:06:42,279 --> 00:06:45,719 Speaker 1: two of your response coming up at twenty three minutes 102 00:06:45,760 --> 00:06:48,919 Speaker 1: after the hour Today's Strawberry Letters subject my three way 103 00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:52,400 Speaker 1: love affair. We'll get back into it right after this. 104 00:06:53,160 --> 00:06:57,960 Speaker 1: You're listening show, all right, Come on, Steve, let's recap 105 00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:01,200 Speaker 1: today's strawberry letter. The subject is is my three way 106 00:07:01,600 --> 00:07:06,240 Speaker 1: love affair for the old married woman and husband They 107 00:07:06,279 --> 00:07:08,760 Speaker 1: have a sister friend. Well it's a husband now, but 108 00:07:08,839 --> 00:07:11,000 Speaker 1: we're gonna take you on this journey. And the sister 109 00:07:11,080 --> 00:07:12,760 Speaker 1: friend been the major part of this woman's life and 110 00:07:12,840 --> 00:07:15,160 Speaker 1: to you seven, they do everything together. Keep that in mind. 111 00:07:15,320 --> 00:07:17,680 Speaker 1: Even when to the same college graduated at the same time. 112 00:07:17,720 --> 00:07:21,520 Speaker 1: When I got engaged, she got engaged. Our fiances didn't 113 00:07:21,560 --> 00:07:25,640 Speaker 1: get along. So my man, which is her fiance, the 114 00:07:25,760 --> 00:07:28,720 Speaker 1: writer of this letter, would always take my bestie side 115 00:07:28,760 --> 00:07:31,560 Speaker 1: when she was having an issue with her fiance. Now, 116 00:07:31,560 --> 00:07:36,440 Speaker 1: a few weeks after everybody got engaged, my man told 117 00:07:36,440 --> 00:07:39,600 Speaker 1: me that my bestie's man was cheating on her. I 118 00:07:39,800 --> 00:07:43,560 Speaker 1: was shocking, hurt when I saw the video of her 119 00:07:43,640 --> 00:07:50,040 Speaker 1: fiance asleep naked over his side chick's house. I'm confused, 120 00:07:51,360 --> 00:07:56,640 Speaker 1: where did your man get this video from? Because they 121 00:07:56,800 --> 00:08:01,320 Speaker 1: don't get along. The two fiances don't get along, and 122 00:08:01,520 --> 00:08:04,520 Speaker 1: the two fiance says don't like each other. He always 123 00:08:04,560 --> 00:08:07,680 Speaker 1: sided with the girl. Where did he get the video? 124 00:08:08,200 --> 00:08:10,520 Speaker 1: Because if I don't like a dude and we ain't cool, 125 00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:13,240 Speaker 1: why would I show him a video, or me asleep 126 00:08:13,280 --> 00:08:17,080 Speaker 1: over another cheek's house? What purpose did that, sir? Unless 127 00:08:17,200 --> 00:08:22,160 Speaker 1: your man was there and took the video? You hit him? Crickets? 128 00:08:23,520 --> 00:08:26,560 Speaker 1: We don't know. Did you hit him? Crickets? Just now 129 00:08:28,160 --> 00:08:31,040 Speaker 1: I got you thinking, ain't I? My man and I 130 00:08:31,160 --> 00:08:34,240 Speaker 1: decided not to tell her anything. But then my man 131 00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:37,160 Speaker 1: got really upset with the dude and went and told 132 00:08:37,280 --> 00:08:41,160 Speaker 1: my bestie about the cheating. Like Shirley said, what man 133 00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:46,960 Speaker 1: do that? What man does that? She was so devastated 134 00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:49,160 Speaker 1: she stayed with us for two weeks and called off 135 00:08:49,200 --> 00:08:53,400 Speaker 1: her engagement. So now that we're married, now y'all married. 136 00:08:53,440 --> 00:08:56,440 Speaker 1: Now she's part of our family. She travels with my 137 00:08:56,600 --> 00:08:59,720 Speaker 1: husband and I husband and I. She comes for weekly 138 00:08:59,760 --> 00:09:05,880 Speaker 1: moved knights at our house. Okay, she's dating again, which 139 00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:09,839 Speaker 1: means that she ain't got no problem meeting men. But 140 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:11,839 Speaker 1: check this out. And when she meets me and she 141 00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:14,040 Speaker 1: brings them to meet us, so we could pass judgment 142 00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:16,400 Speaker 1: on it. So it don't take this chick long to 143 00:09:16,559 --> 00:09:19,559 Speaker 1: meet men because she ain't got no problem meeting men. 144 00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:23,959 Speaker 1: So I'm assuming that your girl is attractive, and I 145 00:09:24,080 --> 00:09:29,520 Speaker 1: think your girl is attractive to your husband, so attractive 146 00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:35,319 Speaker 1: that he wants her around everywhere. So now y'all traveling together, 147 00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:41,600 Speaker 1: y'all doing movie nights at the house. I've been noticing 148 00:09:41,679 --> 00:09:44,760 Speaker 1: later that my husband is more opinionated than usual, and 149 00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:47,360 Speaker 1: none of the guys have been good enough for my bestie. 150 00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:51,960 Speaker 1: That's a red flag for me. I had a lady 151 00:09:52,040 --> 00:09:54,400 Speaker 1: on my talk show one time said women should stop 152 00:09:54,480 --> 00:10:00,200 Speaker 1: collecting red flags. It's a red flag for reasons. Stop 153 00:10:00,320 --> 00:10:01,880 Speaker 1: collecting him. But you didn't put this one in the 154 00:10:01,960 --> 00:10:05,160 Speaker 1: back seat of the car. So I jokingly asked him, 155 00:10:05,200 --> 00:10:09,480 Speaker 1: I joke, you know, would you like to clone yourself 156 00:10:09,559 --> 00:10:11,199 Speaker 1: so your best it could be with a man just 157 00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:15,040 Speaker 1: like him? He got irritated with me, so I've been 158 00:10:15,120 --> 00:10:17,800 Speaker 1: wondering if something is going on with him and my bestie. 159 00:10:18,720 --> 00:10:21,199 Speaker 1: As a test, I told him that we're going on 160 00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:24,400 Speaker 1: our anniversary trip alone. He said it'd be weird to 161 00:10:24,480 --> 00:10:26,640 Speaker 1: leave your bestie out. I asked him if we were 162 00:10:26,679 --> 00:10:28,959 Speaker 1: in a three way love affair. He laughed it off 163 00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:32,200 Speaker 1: and said no, but he does really care about her feelings. 164 00:10:32,880 --> 00:10:37,199 Speaker 1: What's going on here? Okay, okay, okay, you're ready, You're ready. 165 00:10:37,559 --> 00:10:41,440 Speaker 1: What you think going on? Because that's what you wrote 166 00:10:41,440 --> 00:10:45,839 Speaker 1: the letter? Folk usually what women think and feel is 167 00:10:45,920 --> 00:10:56,079 Speaker 1: the deal. I've said that now. The fact that this 168 00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:59,199 Speaker 1: whole letter took you this long to write and then 169 00:10:59,280 --> 00:11:03,439 Speaker 1: your last is what's going on here. It's really amazing 170 00:11:03,520 --> 00:11:07,880 Speaker 1: to me now when he said, when you told him 171 00:11:07,960 --> 00:11:10,959 Speaker 1: y'all was going on y'all anniversary trip alone, and he 172 00:11:11,040 --> 00:11:13,760 Speaker 1: said it'd be weird to leave my best yeout ask 173 00:11:13,880 --> 00:11:16,400 Speaker 1: him if we are in the three way love a fact? Yeah, 174 00:11:16,480 --> 00:11:20,640 Speaker 1: that's what. Yeah, that's that's what you're in. That's what 175 00:11:20,760 --> 00:11:24,920 Speaker 1: you're in. But you know, you gotta be careful what 176 00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:26,880 Speaker 1: you say and let come out your mouth. You did 177 00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:31,600 Speaker 1: say y'all do everything together, didn't Ain't that what you said? 178 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:37,520 Speaker 1: Didn't y'all invite this third party into y'all's life and home? 179 00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:44,199 Speaker 1: Don't she go on all the trips with y'all and 180 00:11:44,360 --> 00:11:47,160 Speaker 1: she eager to go. She'll never say, girl, nigga, y'all 181 00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:49,120 Speaker 1: do y'all, y'all need some blue time. I ain't even 182 00:11:49,240 --> 00:11:51,439 Speaker 1: go out there and be no third will because that's 183 00:11:51,480 --> 00:11:53,839 Speaker 1: what most people say. Girl. Let me sitting up having 184 00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:55,920 Speaker 1: no dinner with y'all and everything, and I'm the only one. 185 00:11:55,960 --> 00:11:58,199 Speaker 1: I ain't got no man. Well, she ain't saying that 186 00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:04,280 Speaker 1: because she got a man. Yeah, because when he going 187 00:12:04,320 --> 00:12:06,360 Speaker 1: on there to get the coffee, where do you think 188 00:12:06,400 --> 00:12:10,920 Speaker 1: he stopped when he go to the gym and the 189 00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:12,839 Speaker 1: spot on the trip? Well, who you think at the 190 00:12:12,880 --> 00:12:15,679 Speaker 1: gym in the spot? His gym work getting done in 191 00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:20,040 Speaker 1: that other room. Let me ask you another question. You 192 00:12:20,120 --> 00:12:22,880 Speaker 1: ever noticed that the two of y'all ain't ever alone together. 193 00:12:22,880 --> 00:12:29,680 Speaker 1: I'm talking about you and your girlfriend. You ever noticed that? Oh? Wow, huh? Yeah? 194 00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:32,439 Speaker 1: Have you? Have you picked that game? When y'all go 195 00:12:32,559 --> 00:12:34,320 Speaker 1: on the trips, it ain't ever you and your girl 196 00:12:34,400 --> 00:12:36,800 Speaker 1: going down for coffee or te. He always going somewhere 197 00:12:36,880 --> 00:12:40,160 Speaker 1: by himself, but you don't see her. She don't come girl, 198 00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:41,800 Speaker 1: since he going to the gym. I'm gonna come on 199 00:12:41,960 --> 00:12:45,240 Speaker 1: up now, cause the gym work getting done in her room. 200 00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:52,559 Speaker 1: Push up, push ups, sit ups, pull ups, jumping Jack's 201 00:12:52,720 --> 00:12:57,240 Speaker 1: mountain climbers. Yeah, you know a lot of cardio, Yeah, 202 00:12:57,280 --> 00:13:01,920 Speaker 1: a lot of cardios. Knee being Yova's lighted downward dogs, 203 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:06,480 Speaker 1: we're doing yoga. Leave us your comments on Today's Strawberry 204 00:13:06,559 --> 00:13:10,040 Speaker 1: Letter on Instagram and Facebook at Steve harveysm dot com, 205 00:13:10,360 --> 00:13:13,079 Speaker 1: and check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on the Man. 206 00:13:13,240 --> 00:13:15,839 Speaker 1: Coming up next, you know what it is, Junior in 207 00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:19,560 Speaker 1: sports talk. Right after this, you're listening to this Dave 208 00:13:19,679 --> 00:13:20,640 Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show