Speaker 1: Wind Down with Janet Kramer and Michael Cosson and iHeart
Speaker 1: Radio and People's Choice Award nominated podcast.
Speaker 2: We got the nomination down there.
Speaker 3: What is that gonna stay there for years to come?
Speaker 3: In like three years? Nominated back in twenty nineteen.
Speaker 2: For the wind Down. Yeah, I mean that would be
Speaker 2: nice if it said Wine Doown winner, that would be great. Hey,
Speaker 2: speaking of Wine Down, we are doing a Wine Doown
Speaker 2: tour and we are going to Atlanta, Chicago, Michigan. I
Speaker 2: don't know why I always have to sing Michigan because
Speaker 2: it's my hometown. Nashville, Philly, Philly, Maryland, Maryland, a few
Speaker 2: other places, Louisville, Louisville. So get your tickets because we're
Speaker 2: gonna sit down. So people keep kind of asking, like,
Speaker 2: what's this live podcast thing about. It's not really a
Speaker 2: live podcast. It's more like an evening with So we're
Speaker 2: gonna sit down, we're gonna talk, we're gonna play games,
Speaker 2: we're gonna have fun. My girls, Sarah's going to be
Speaker 2: there with us, and then we'll have some surprise guests
Speaker 2: along the way.
Speaker 3: We interact, we interact questions, we ask questions, we bring
Speaker 3: people up on stage, We uh, Jana sings at the
Speaker 3: end of the.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I sing like a forty five minute hour set.
Speaker 2: It's just a lot of fun. So we really want
Speaker 2: you guys to wind down with us. Go to Janacramer
Speaker 2: dot com or Ticketmaster to get your tickets, and then
Speaker 2: we also signed to at the end of the show,
Speaker 2: so it's really fun. We get to meet all of
Speaker 2: you guys. And if you want to go to an
Speaker 2: actual live podcast, Ben and Ashley are actually doing one too,
Speaker 2: the Almost Famous Live January eleventh at the Palace of
Speaker 2: Fun Arts and sin fran So get your tickets on
Speaker 2: ticketmaster dot com for the Almost Famous Live. So super fun.
Speaker 2: You know, it started to really take off those events.
Speaker 2: Even I was talking to the scribbing in girls because
Speaker 2: they're they're wanting to do that too, and I think
Speaker 2: it's a I think it's really cool. I know Dak
Speaker 2: Shepherd's coming to Nashville soon, which I want to check out.
Speaker 3: That's about the competition, I know.
Speaker 2: Well, I wonder because I know it's a live podcast,
Speaker 2: but we don't record ours, just because I feel like
Speaker 2: if it was recorded then it was like people would
Speaker 2: be like, I'll just watch it on YouTube or listen to.
Speaker 3: It and our outlook is people want to come see
Speaker 3: something that they can't get elsewhere.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so that's what I'm just I'm just curious, like
Speaker 2: if are they all and when they say live podcasts,
Speaker 2: is it actually can you listen to it on the show?
Speaker 2: I don't know, Yeah, do you.
Speaker 4: Know, Mark, I think it depends on I think it
Speaker 4: almost famous will be a podcast you'll be able to download.
Speaker 4: I think it varies from show to show, but I
Speaker 4: think most of them like to do that. They like
Speaker 4: to kind of double up, you know. They they did
Speaker 4: the show and then they record the show and then
Speaker 4: there are podcasts that's done for that week.
Speaker 3: And I can see the entry on that too for
Speaker 3: people for audience members if they you know, if the
Speaker 3: podcaster interacts with the audience like we do, and they
Speaker 3: get to go back and listen to themselves interact at
Speaker 3: the you know, evening with on the next week during
Speaker 3: the during when it aired. But that's not what we do.
Speaker 2: Well, if they want to see that, then they can
Speaker 2: go to Tully and download the Telly app because that's
Speaker 2: kind of a little version of that. We have a
Speaker 2: show called in Perfect Harmony that we're doing too, So
Speaker 2: that's really fun.
Speaker 3: So just lots going on eighth Central.
Speaker 2: Look at that, babe, So excited for the show.
Speaker 5: Today.
Speaker 2: We have Gabrielle Stone coming on and I actually met
Speaker 2: her mom because she played my grandma in the Lifetime
Speaker 2: movie that's coming out November seventeenth, Dee Wallace's daughter. So
Speaker 2: she's got a book out that's out called Eat Prey
Speaker 2: hashtag FML and the very crazy story because I actually
Speaker 2: I was talking to her mom and I had no
Speaker 2: idea who Gabrielle was the time, But then when you
Speaker 2: started talking about this guy that she dated, I was like,
Speaker 2: oh my gosh, is your daughter Gabrielle? Because I knew
Speaker 2: all about Gabrielle because the acts told me, and you.
Speaker 3: Knew Gabrielle's name.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Interesting, but you didn't put.
Speaker 2: Too never put two and two together ever. So it's
Speaker 2: just it was like, so stay tuned to hear it's interesting.
Speaker 3: Yeah, gabrielle story is very interesting.
Speaker 2: It is. So I'm excited to talk to her and
Speaker 2: sit down with her later and then drink a lot
Speaker 2: of wine tonight with her. Yeah why not? So what's
Speaker 2: new in your world, Coffin?
Speaker 3: Oh man, we have a lot coming up the next
Speaker 3: couple of months. So really everything I have going on,
Speaker 3: you have going on. This week, we've been surviving without
Speaker 3: a nanny.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's been that's been fun. But also I feel
Speaker 2: like it's doable too.
Speaker 3: It is it is. I mean, you know that signs
Speaker 3: spoiled or we're fortunate enough to have a nanny that
Speaker 3: we love and that you know does a fantastic job,
Speaker 3: but it's it's I will say I'm impressed with how
Speaker 3: we've handled it this week because there's been a lot.
Speaker 3: It takes a lot of communication, right to be on
Speaker 3: the same page. And I feel like any relationship, and
Speaker 3: us especially, you just kind of anticipate or expect the
Speaker 3: other one to know your schedule, whether you put it
Speaker 3: in the calendar or whether you talked about it two
Speaker 3: weeks ago, and expect the other person to remember. I
Speaker 3: feel like we've done a good job at staying on
Speaker 3: top of this week and expressing what we needed. Now,
Speaker 3: maybe we can carry that over into weeks that even
Speaker 3: when we do have the nanny, right, it would probably
Speaker 3: be helpful.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because I feel like there's a lot of times
Speaker 2: it's like, hey, I have this at ten o'clock, I
Speaker 2: have a call it's very important, can you take the kids?
Speaker 2: And if not? Because most of the time I would
Speaker 2: never say anything, and then I would just get mad
Speaker 2: at you for like, don't you know that I have
Speaker 2: this thing today at ten? So I would like unfairly
Speaker 2: get frustrated with you because I would figure that you
Speaker 2: either looked at the calendar or like that I had
Speaker 2: to work. So it's just I think naming like what
Speaker 2: you have to do has been.
Speaker 3: Helpful for sure, and I appreciate you are challenging that.
Speaker 3: Which part the fact that you understand that you don't
Speaker 3: I have in the past, I mean, done that, always
Speaker 3: do that?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, well I've definitely feel like I've gotten
Speaker 2: better at it. It's like ask for It's like, ask
Speaker 2: for what you need. But the problem that I have
Speaker 2: a hard time with because I remember talking to my therapist,
Speaker 2: She's like, ask for help, but I'm like, I have
Speaker 2: a really hard time with that because it's like when
Speaker 2: if you ask for help but then they don't really
Speaker 2: do it the right way or they don't do it.
Speaker 2: It's like I don't want to have to ask you
Speaker 2: to do the kids laundry. I don't want to ask
Speaker 2: you to clean up the stuff in the back. I
Speaker 2: don't want to have to ask you to do those things.
Speaker 2: But then it feels like when you're doing everything, so
Speaker 2: it's like how do you because I'm like, I would
Speaker 2: just think that you would help with those things, right,
Speaker 2: and then we have our duties and you have yours
Speaker 2: and I have mine. But then it's just you know,
Speaker 2: So that's where I have like a hard time. I
Speaker 2: have a tough time with that because I'm like, what's
Speaker 2: my role and there's your role, but then also asking
Speaker 2: for help and like when to ask for help?
Speaker 3: Well, and that's where I feel, you know, sometimes where
Speaker 3: you maybe you don't take something as your role. And
Speaker 3: I think we split things pretty evenly, like it just
Speaker 3: kind of goes We'll like a seesaw kind of goes
Speaker 3: back and forth because we both have done like everything
Speaker 3: that is required to whether the kids or dinner or
Speaker 3: stuff for us or whatever, we've both done those things.
Speaker 3: But I but I do feel like sometimes when you
Speaker 3: do do something, maybe like even though you're doing it,
Speaker 3: your first thought might be, well, why do I Why
Speaker 3: am I doing this right now? Why don't I do this?
Speaker 3: And I'm like in my head when I when I
Speaker 3: do something, I just kind of do it because it
Speaker 3: needs to get done. I don't necessarily think, not, well,
Speaker 3: Janel should be doing this right now.
Speaker 2: And that's what you think.
Speaker 3: I'm thinking, mad, That's I do. That's what I make up.
Speaker 3: I make up that because at times, not often, not always,
Speaker 3: not none of those pronouns. At times you make it.
Speaker 3: You'll make a comment about the laundry or something or
Speaker 3: whatever after you had just completed that task, and I'm like, what, okay.
Speaker 3: In my head, I'm like then the whole time, you
Speaker 3: just sit there. Anytime you do something, you think, why
Speaker 3: didn't I do this already?
Speaker 2: No, I don't think it. I can see how you
Speaker 2: think that. I don't. I don't do that. I just
Speaker 2: have a hard time with you know. I just I
Speaker 2: wonder the timeline sometimes and like do you see the
Speaker 2: laundry filling up? I'm like, would you ever get it?
Speaker 2: You know, I've talked I talked to Leslie about this
Speaker 2: a whole time. It's like even her sons, it's like
Speaker 2: they would probably buy new underwear before they ever clean
Speaker 2: their underwear.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 2: It's just and like the same with like Chris, I'm
Speaker 2: not faulting you. I'm just really just trying to bring
Speaker 2: up a topic of discussion.
Speaker 3: Okay, this is a great topic though, because I do
Speaker 3: ironically I have something to bring to your attention.
Speaker 2: Okay, so.
Speaker 3: Last week I had a poker night.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, you took a bath I did.
Speaker 3: You had wine.
Speaker 2: I was still drinking it.
Speaker 3: There was a wine glass on the edge of our bathtub,
Speaker 3: in between where the two twel racks are that I
Speaker 3: saw sitting there for a couple of days, and I said,
Speaker 3: you know what, I'm going to leave that and see
Speaker 3: if Janna picks it.
Speaker 2: Up, oh a little game.
Speaker 3: After a few days, I said, you know what, I
Speaker 3: need to at least move this glass so someone's towel
Speaker 3: doesn't knock it and breaks and shatters all over our
Speaker 3: bathroom floor. So I moved it onto our counter.
Speaker 2: I didn't notice that in.
Speaker 3: The bathroom in between our sinks. I left it there
Speaker 3: for another two days, still did not move. So today
Speaker 3: I finally said that's enough, I'm just going to move
Speaker 3: the glass. I didn't say anything. I didn't bring it up.
Speaker 3: I just moved it, put it in the sink, and
Speaker 3: put water in it to clean.
Speaker 2: I didn't even notice the glass.
Speaker 3: Okay, and that's okay.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I didn't notice that. I remember having it, and
Speaker 2: I remember putting it there, and I remember being too
Speaker 2: tired to go put it in the kitchen, and I
Speaker 2: truly have I totally forgot about it.
Speaker 3: There, right, And so when I knows, two nights ago,
Speaker 3: when I let the dogs out at night and they're
Speaker 3: chewing my paintbrushes, I said, you know what, I'm too
Speaker 3: tired of cleaning that up right now, I'm gonna deal
Speaker 3: with it before the weekend.
Speaker 2: Oh, it's so funny. It truly is funny. Though it
Speaker 2: really is like a double standard.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I appreciate you admitting that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I do. I can admit that full circle.
Speaker 3: I feel like there's a lot of relationships out there
Speaker 3: that are like, yes, yep, you're.
Speaker 2: Right, double standard. Okay.
Speaker 6: The way I've always looked at it was like that
Speaker 6: kind of like in basketball, like shot attempts versus baskets made,
Speaker 6: because like Allison is just drained in threes all day
Speaker 6: long in terms of keeping the house together, and I'm
Speaker 6: I'm not even taking a shot, you know, And like
Speaker 6: so when I do and I miss, then it's like
Speaker 6: a bigger deal because I was like my one chance
Speaker 6: to like keep this place clean, and I left my
Speaker 6: backpack on the floor again, and I think, you know,
Speaker 6: and I see there's in there's an imbalance there in
Speaker 6: terms of like stuff being done around the house.
Speaker 2: And uh.
Speaker 6: And then I go into the whole. Well, I make
Speaker 6: all the money, you know, and it doesn't matter. It's
Speaker 6: it's our house and we should both be working equally
Speaker 6: to keep maintaining.
Speaker 2: Is that what you say?
Speaker 3: That's one hundred percent.
Speaker 2: What I said.
Speaker 1: What did she do?
Speaker 3: Uh?
Speaker 6: Well, she says that's you know, that's true, But that's
Speaker 6: not fair for you to say because because it's not
Speaker 6: you know, and uh, And that's an art that's a
Speaker 6: place that I like fall back to sometimes, uh, because
Speaker 6: I feel guilty about not doing more stuff around the house.
Speaker 3: And that's what and that's what it is.
Speaker 6: And that's maybe getting defensive and you know and being
Speaker 6: motivated by shame. But I see there's a problem.
Speaker 3: I'm working on it. Yeah, No, I totally get that.
Speaker 3: And I mean I think there definitely is something to
Speaker 3: be said for that. And you know, like in our relationship,
Speaker 3: I'm not the breadwinner. But at the same time, like
Speaker 3: I can understand why in relationships like if I gave
Speaker 3: Janna all the time for stuff, whether around the house
Speaker 3: or anything else, it's like, well, I'm doing something here,
Speaker 3: you know, I am doing something to do. I don't
Speaker 3: want to have to remind you, but I do pull weight.
Speaker 3: It may not look the same as you would like,
Speaker 3: but you know, so I could definitely see how that
Speaker 3: would be aggravating.
Speaker 2: I mean, you know, again, it should be equal no
Speaker 2: matter who's pulling.
Speaker 3: Right, And we do honestly for opposition, we do a
Speaker 3: fantastic job.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we do.
Speaker 2: We do a great job. I mean, there's plenty of
Speaker 2: husbands that I know that don't do half as much
Speaker 2: as you know what we do together, right, you do, so, Mad,
Speaker 2: Mad props always for that. October is a giant month
Speaker 2: of travel, and there's some things that I'm doing just
Speaker 2: for the paycheck. And you know, I hate to say that,
Speaker 2: but you know, because I'd rather be home with the kids,
Speaker 2: and traveling is just like to be away as much
Speaker 2: as I'm going to be in October, It's it's already
Speaker 2: like stressing me out. But I know that I have
Speaker 2: to go and I need to make the money, and
Speaker 2: you know, for the family. And Mike does a really
Speaker 2: good job of at least appreciating that, and we'll text
Speaker 2: me and say, hey, I appreciate the hard work right now.
Speaker 2: And sometimes like that validation is like okay, like yeah,
Speaker 2: let's get on this plane, let's do this. You know,
Speaker 2: so I don't know, like I do personally, I like
Speaker 2: that appreciation because I know that, like he's not taking
Speaker 2: it for granted, that he knows the sacrifice that I'm
Speaker 2: making because I don't want to be away from the
Speaker 2: kids ever, which is why I'm trying to, you know,
Speaker 2: smuggle the kids into New York when we have a
Speaker 2: New York trip later in October. So and he's like, well,
Speaker 2: I don't want to take him, and I'm like I do,
Speaker 2: and I don't. I'm going to be gone so much
Speaker 2: this month and so, but yeah, it's interesting.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that that appreciate that appreciation is important.
Speaker 3: I appreciate your acknowledging.
Speaker 2: That you appreciate you appreciation. I appreciate you because I
Speaker 2: do try.
Speaker 3: I do, I do try to make a conscious effort
Speaker 3: because I know your personality. I know you don't want
Speaker 3: to and my person and audi not that I want
Speaker 3: to be away from the kids more than you. Do,
Speaker 3: or I care less than you do. But my mindset
Speaker 3: maybe this is just a real thing too. It's like,
Speaker 3: all right, this is my job. I gotta get it done.
Speaker 3: I gotta go. End of story where I feel maybe
Speaker 3: this could be a generalization women. Maybe because of the
Speaker 3: mother motherly feeling, You're just like, no, I don't want
Speaker 3: to leave at all for any reason.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I hate leaving.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I know you do.
Speaker 2: I hate it because then I'm like, my kids don't
Speaker 2: even know me. It's like we just spent and I'm
Speaker 2: really like, I see them all the time, but it's
Speaker 2: just those two three four day trips that just kind
Speaker 2: of eat me up back to back. But it's all good. Okay. Well,
Speaker 2: in other news, Sarah's here and also my friend Gabriella
Speaker 2: just pulled into so let's get them on the show. Okay.
Speaker 2: I'm really excited because I know I just because so
Speaker 2: I had the pleasure of I'm going to talk about
Speaker 2: you like you're not here right now.
Speaker 1: Okay, cool, I'll wait.
Speaker 2: I had the pleasure of working with our next guest
Speaker 2: Mom on Christmas in Louisiana, which is premiering November seventeenth.
Speaker 2: Don't laugh, Cruise I'm.
Speaker 7: Laughing at Christmas and Louisiana.
Speaker 3: Yeah. I was on a Lifetime movie Christmas and Louisiana.
Speaker 3: It's always on late day movie.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Lifetime is lit. No, I love it, but I
Speaker 2: just I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't like especially Christmas.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I don't like to like you known. Okay,
Speaker 2: here we go.
Speaker 7: Janna's in a movie that's coming out November seventeenth on Lifetime.
Speaker 2: Christmas and Louisiana, Thank You, with d Wallace, and I
Speaker 2: had the pleasure of working with her, and she's she
Speaker 2: kept telling me about her daughter and about her book
Speaker 2: because I was kind of sharing my story with your
Speaker 2: mom and she was just like, oh, my goodness, you
Speaker 2: know you and my daughter, you guys have so much
Speaker 2: in common. And then I got your book that second
Speaker 2: I amazoned it and it was called Eat Prey hashtag FML,
Speaker 2: and I was like, oh, she's already my best FRIENDECT.
Speaker 2: I love her. So everyone welcome. Gabrielle Stone, Thank you,
Speaker 2: Thank you. I love your book. Thank you, because some
Speaker 2: halfway through I haven't finished it yet, but what I
Speaker 2: love about it, and this is what your mom told
Speaker 2: me too, was she was just like, you had offers
Speaker 2: to do a book deal with other publishers, and you
Speaker 2: were like, no, like, I'm doing it my way and
Speaker 2: this is how I want to do it. And I
Speaker 2: love that because it shows too in the book, like
Speaker 2: your your voice in the book is just like this
Speaker 2: is this is it? You know, and you didn't like
Speaker 2: hold back on anything. I think maybe people would be like, well,
Speaker 2: maybe like ten, like go sus softer on this note
Speaker 2: or yeah.
Speaker 1: And that's what a lot of the bigger publishing places
Speaker 1: wanted to do, is well, maybe we should tone it down,
Speaker 1: maybe we don't write about like this bad situation. And
Speaker 1: that felt so inauthentic to me. And I knew that
Speaker 1: when all this stuff was happening to me, if I
Speaker 1: was going to share it with the world, it needed
Speaker 1: to be done in a vulnerable, true, authentic way, and
Speaker 1: the best way to do that was to just kind
Speaker 1: of keep control and do it by myself.
Speaker 3: What inspired you to share it publicly?
Speaker 1: So for a little backstory, I was married for almost
Speaker 1: two years, found out my husband was having an affair
Speaker 1: with the nineteen year old for six months, filed for divorce,
Speaker 1: left shortly after that, met a man, fell madly in
Speaker 1: love with each other, was like a whirlwind romance and
Speaker 1: convinced me to go on a month long trip to
Speaker 1: Italy with him. Forty eight hours before we were getting
Speaker 1: on a plane, he told me he needed to go
Speaker 1: by himself, and I was absolutely devastated, broke my heart
Speaker 1: like my ex husband never could have done. And I
Speaker 1: was like, well, I have a decision to make, and
Speaker 1: that's either stay at home and be heart broken or
Speaker 1: go travel Europe for a month by myself. And I
Speaker 1: was like, well, good, I'm gonna go. So to answer
Speaker 1: your question, I knew the second that happened and I
Speaker 1: decided I was going to go by myself, that I
Speaker 1: was going to write about it because it felt like
Speaker 1: I was going to move. I mean, my friends would
Speaker 1: call me and be like, what's going on this week?
Speaker 1: In the Netflix episode It's Gabrielle's life, like it was ridiculous,
Speaker 1: one thing after another, and I knew that whatever I
Speaker 1: was going to learn at the end of this experience
Speaker 1: was going to be really powerful in a healing way,
Speaker 1: and I wanted to be able to share that with
Speaker 1: the women and men of the world. That actually had
Speaker 1: a lot of men reach out to me after reading it,
Speaker 1: which has been really cool.
Speaker 3: That's awesome. Yeah, what with your first marriage. You know
Speaker 3: a lot of people have talked to as Jane and
Speaker 3: I like why do we stay?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Why were we willing to work on it? In your situation,
Speaker 3: how did you know? Like why'd you know I'm gone? Period? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Which is so interesting because I've listened to this podcast
Speaker 1: with you guys talk and it's I was so excited
Speaker 1: to kind of like compare everything because my situation was
Speaker 1: drastically different we my ex and I I was not
Speaker 1: in love with him. I didn't realize that until I
Speaker 1: met the guy after that and was like, oh, this
Speaker 1: is what it lopposed to feel like. And I think
Speaker 1: I married him because he was safe. I come from
Speaker 1: a long line of like abandonment wounds. I lost my
Speaker 1: father when I was a little girl, and then I
Speaker 1: lost my boyfriend when I was in high school. And
Speaker 1: I think I married him because he was safe to me.
Speaker 1: So when I found out about the affair that had
Speaker 1: been going on for six months and there you know,
Speaker 1: I write about the main one, I'm pretty confident that
Speaker 1: there was other things going on. There's one, there's usually, yeah,
Speaker 1: but the depth of it, like I mean, second phone, hotel,
Speaker 1: rooms under a different name. Like the extent of it
Speaker 1: was so intense. I was just like, God, you must
Speaker 1: be exhausted, dude, Like you should have just been like, Yo,
Speaker 1: this isn't working, Like let's get a divorce. I would
Speaker 1: have been like, Okay, cool, let's try and be friends.
Speaker 1: But the way he went about it was so dirty
Speaker 1: and deceitful. But to be brutally honest in that answer,
Speaker 1: it was a way out for me because I didn't
Speaker 1: know why I had been miserable for the last like
Speaker 1: six seven eight months until I found that out. But
Speaker 1: it was a way that I was like, oh, okay,
Speaker 1: I'm done, and it was just the disrespect level and
Speaker 1: the trust I wasn't I knew that there was no
Speaker 1: way to rebuild that for me and him personally, and
Speaker 1: I didn't want to. I think, if you want to
Speaker 1: and you love the person, that's obviously a vastly different situation.
Speaker 1: That was not the case for me, and I really
Speaker 1: counted as like a huge blessing. I'm like weirdly thankful
Speaker 1: to him because I can't imagine still being in that situation.
Speaker 2: Well, I feel like a lot of people do that.
Speaker 7: I feel like so many people get married because they're like, Okay,
Speaker 7: he's safe or she's safe for like, we've been together
Speaker 7: so long, why not let's just get me, you know.
Speaker 1: And it's like what And it's like, I'm twenty six
Speaker 1: and then we'll be married for a couple of years
Speaker 1: and then I'll have babies and then and now I'm like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, I'm only thirty, Like what.
Speaker 3: What do you think if that, if he never had
Speaker 3: affairs or anything like that, do you think you would
Speaker 3: have ever reached a point where you're like, I can't
Speaker 3: do this.
Speaker 1: I think I would have stayed a very long time
Speaker 1: trying to make it work, because I I even leaving
Speaker 1: with the cheating, I was feeling guilty because my mom
Speaker 1: had just given me this dream wedding. We had just
Speaker 1: gone on this amazing honeymoon. All of our friends and
Speaker 1: family came and like we're so supportive, and it was
Speaker 1: this big spectacle, and all of a sudden, it's just
Speaker 1: over that quickly. So I yeah, I think I would
Speaker 1: have stayed a lot longer trying to make it work
Speaker 1: and been really unhappy doing so, until it ultimately just
Speaker 1: wasted a couple more years of my life. And then
Speaker 1: I eventually would have would have left.
Speaker 2: I feel like I have to kind of retrack something
Speaker 2: that I said, because it's always kind of bothered me
Speaker 2: because it was a headline that said I didn't take
Speaker 2: the easy way out, and I think that's not a
Speaker 2: fair thing to say, because sometimes it's harder to leave too,
Speaker 2: you know, sometimes it's the strongest thing to do is leave.
Speaker 1: And I think it's dependent on the situation.
Speaker 2: I think it is completely dependent on the situation. I agree,
Speaker 2: but I thought that always is kind of it's like
Speaker 2: one of the things like she didn't take the easy
Speaker 2: way out, and I'm like, oh, that's so. That doesn't
Speaker 2: mean that everybody that leaves is taking the easy way out. No,
Speaker 2: either or not, because sometimes it's harder.
Speaker 1: Yeah, on both ends.
Speaker 2: And I would say, like, honestly, sure, there were times
Speaker 2: when I'm like, it would have been harder for me
Speaker 2: to leave. They're both hard, but sometimes it is harder
Speaker 2: because of the logistics of the kids, and like.
Speaker 1: Starting over life, I was starting off, I was so
Speaker 1: lucky that like we didn't known a house together, we
Speaker 1: didn't have children. I mean, I can't imagine that would
Speaker 1: have been a completely different decision making process if other
Speaker 1: elements would have been included. I was really thinking.
Speaker 2: Did he want to stay and work it out?
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't think so, but I don't really know.
Speaker 1: I didn't really give the opportunity to like have that
Speaker 1: discussion when he was on a business trip when I
Speaker 1: found out everything. He came home. I like had the
Speaker 1: papers handed to him when he got back to our
Speaker 1: house and had like a fifteen minute conversation where he
Speaker 1: continued to light in my face and was just like okay, bye,
Speaker 1: and walked out the door, and felt like a whole
Speaker 1: weight was lifted off me.
Speaker 2: I can imagine like you were probably like you said,
Speaker 2: you were, like.
Speaker 1: Yeah, dodged like not a bullet, like an army of snipers,
Speaker 1: like completely.
Speaker 2: So then, how how soon was it that you met
Speaker 2: your next.
Speaker 1: Okay, so the next dude we'll call him. Character name
Speaker 1: is Javier.
Speaker 2: Oh and by the way, I know Javier, so that's
Speaker 2: another connection. You know him because we're friends, you've met him.
Speaker 2: But I've talked about Hoavier before.
Speaker 1: And this is the only podcast that I've ever done
Speaker 1: where someone knows one of the main characters in.
Speaker 2: Because your mom, her mom was talking about her life
Speaker 2: and I go oh my god, I go, is it Javier?
Speaker 2: And she goes, oh my god, how do you know?
Speaker 2: And I said, oh my god, I remember him saying
Speaker 2: he was going to take a girl to Italy and
Speaker 2: he decided this person. Yeah, I've known him for twelve
Speaker 2: plus plus years old.
Speaker 7: Yah.
Speaker 1: So when her and I connected and yeah, messaged each
Speaker 1: other on Instagram, I was like, I'm kind of not
Speaker 1: believing this whole situation. She's like, I know, oh, I know.
Speaker 2: So I was just like, yeah. So I was just like,
Speaker 2: I remember him vividly saying for you, she was going
Speaker 2: through some stuff and you know, he's like and then
Speaker 2: he said that, you know, he just needed to not
Speaker 2: go with her. And then I'm like and then I'm
Speaker 2: talking to your mom and I'm like, oh my god,
Speaker 2: Like this is just like crazy because I remember this conversation.
Speaker 1: So his backstory is about a year and a half
Speaker 1: before we got together, he lost his brother and it
Speaker 1: really really affected him, as you know it would, and
Speaker 1: I think he stuffed down a lot of that grief.
Speaker 2: And suicide too, which is like a nut whole.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I think he kind of buried it, and
Speaker 1: you know, when started working a lot, and you know,
Speaker 1: just kind of tried to run. Felt like he dealt
Speaker 1: with it but didn't. And when we fell in love,
Speaker 1: I think that opened up a floodgate of just lots
Speaker 1: and lots of emotions.
Speaker 2: Well, and he's never loved someone the way that he
Speaker 2: loved you ever, too, Like that was like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 2: I think that probably scared the crap out of him.
Speaker 1: I think that's exactly what happened. Yeah, I just got
Speaker 1: caught in the crossfire of it. But I have a
Speaker 1: lot of compassion and we're still friends and I care
Speaker 1: a lot about him. But it was a really difficult situation.
Speaker 1: I mean, he coming off of the divorce. It was
Speaker 1: like I was fine. I know that sounds weird, but
Speaker 1: I was like, this is where I'm supposed to be.
Speaker 1: I'm really happy that this happened the way that it did,
Speaker 1: Like I am gonna go live this amazing life now.
Speaker 1: And it was the second situation with Javier that really
Speaker 1: like broke my heart. I know, it's so funny like
Speaker 1: having so, yeah, we didn't actually meet for the first
Speaker 1: time after I left the house. We reconnected two weeks,
Speaker 1: but granted this was like a month now that I
Speaker 1: had known about, you know, my ex and that I
Speaker 1: was going to get a divorce, but we he popped
Speaker 1: up on my Instagram page, I followed him. He messaged me.
Speaker 1: He was like where have you been for the last
Speaker 1: six years? I was like, whole funny story, And we
Speaker 1: ended up going to like get lunch and go to
Speaker 1: the beach. And but before, like six years earlier, before
Speaker 1: I had met my ex husband, we had casually gone
Speaker 1: out like twice, like went dancing, made out. That was
Speaker 1: the extent of it. He was like the one person
Speaker 1: I had ever been like casual with and then was
Speaker 1: like okaybye and like lost touch, went got married, got divorced,
Speaker 1: And so we went out this first night and it
Speaker 1: was just like an instant thing to the point where
Speaker 1: he was like what are you doing on this date?
Speaker 1: I'm going to take you to a wedding and like
Speaker 1: you need to meet my mother and I was like okay,
Speaker 1: but like we were it was both of us and
Speaker 1: like his friend's family, like it was like this is
Speaker 1: the girl I'm gonna be with, and everyone was like
Speaker 1: how is this possible? His mom and I clicked like instantly,
Speaker 1: and it was just a month and a half of
Speaker 1: really intense connection before the trip fell apart, and keep
Speaker 1: in mind the whole book, So me finding out about
Speaker 1: the cheating, the divorce, me meeting Javier, us breaking up
Speaker 1: essentially and going to Europe for a month. That all
Speaker 1: happened in like a three and a half month period.
Speaker 7: Wow.
Speaker 1: Yeah, So it was very like really intense and in
Speaker 1: your face there was no breath or break between any
Speaker 1: of these situations.
Speaker 2: So kind of has that been kind of something that
Speaker 2: you've done your whole life, had like very fast moments
Speaker 2: of attraction and love and.
Speaker 1: Not to that extent. I'm a serial monogamous, Like I'm
Speaker 1: not alone a lot. I do go from like one
Speaker 1: relationship to another, never as quick as it happened then,
Speaker 1: and it was never as instant and as intense as
Speaker 1: it was.
Speaker 7: Well that's probably why it was so because you're like, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 7: this is something I've never yelt and done before.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and it wasn't. And that the feelings that I
Speaker 1: had with him made me realize that, like, oh I
Speaker 1: was never really in love with my ex husband at all. Wow.
Speaker 1: So it I mean, it taught me a ton about
Speaker 1: myself even before I left on that crazy trip.
Speaker 3: So after Javier, what was it after that? Like, how
Speaker 3: did you get yourself back together? Like what did you?
Speaker 3: Did you fund another relationship? Did you work on yourself?
Speaker 3: Like what helped you so well?
Speaker 2: You left for Italy?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 5: Was it?
Speaker 2: Did you go to Italy?
Speaker 1: Well? So our original plan was to do all of Italy.
Speaker 1: Our tickets were booked to Rome. So his dad and
Speaker 1: him picked me up from the airport, I mean from sorry,
Speaker 1: from my house. We flew to London together. You didn't, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that was sitting next to each other hanging out. But
Speaker 1: you know what, like honestly, everything was weirdly normal, like
Speaker 1: we've always you weren't nice yet at him, No, that's
Speaker 1: the weird thing we had. We were so connected on
Speaker 1: this like weird soul level that like the only thing
Speaker 1: that changed was that we weren't kissing and holding hands.
Speaker 1: I mean he took the picture of me at the
Speaker 1: airport with my backpack on, where I was like peace out,
Speaker 1: guys and divorced, like this is what's going on in
Speaker 1: my life. By we hung out at the airport for
Speaker 1: like three hours, gone on a plane, flew to London together.
Speaker 1: He then went on to Rome and I started my
Speaker 1: trip in London and like had nothing planned because I
Speaker 1: found out I was going by myself two days.
Speaker 2: Before theres an ounce of you wish that he would
Speaker 2: like changed his mind.
Speaker 1: Well, we thought we had like discussed when we got
Speaker 1: on the plane. We were like, well, you know, our
Speaker 1: flights are booked home together, maybe we'll meet up, depending
Speaker 1: on like how you're feeling and like if my heart
Speaker 1: is not in a million pieces still. So the whole book,
Speaker 1: when I'm on the trip, it's this whole like am
Speaker 1: I going to go sem? Am I not going to go?
Speaker 1: Seem And it's this whole rollercoaster ride of like can't
Speaker 1: close the chapter literally and figuratively. So yeah, it was.
Speaker 1: It was a lot to kind of navigate, but that trip,
Speaker 1: and I wrote the book on the trip, so I
Speaker 1: brought a journal with me. I started at the first
Speaker 1: day in London, and when you open the journal, it
Speaker 1: literally looks almost exactly like how the published book is.
Speaker 1: It's like chapter one. I wasn't like journaling and then
Speaker 1: made it into a book. I knew that that's just
Speaker 1: what it was going to be, so writing about all
Speaker 1: of it on this journey that I was on being alone,
Speaker 1: which was one of my biggest fears my entire life,
Speaker 1: since my dad died was like being okay by myself
Speaker 1: and this was the universe way of being like, Okay,
Speaker 1: well we're going to go face that head on. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so it was really like therapy for me. But No,
Speaker 1: to answer your question, I didn't like jump back into
Speaker 1: another relationship. I was like trying to figure out if
Speaker 1: things were going to change with him or not, and
Speaker 1: knowing in my heart that I kind of like needed
Speaker 1: to be by myself and your just knew myself.
Speaker 3: How old were you during this time?
Speaker 1: I was twenty eight.
Speaker 3: So that's impressive because the whole situation, the way you
Speaker 3: kind of handled it and him seems very adult. It
Speaker 3: really does, Yeah, because I just feel like even in
Speaker 3: my twenties and even late twenties, it was just dramatic
Speaker 3: and you know, big gestures and everything. Yeah, and drama.
Speaker 3: Just the fact that, right and the fact that you
Speaker 3: were able to accept he didn't say because he wanted
Speaker 3: to go with another woman. You know, you knew the
Speaker 3: reasons why, and you guys are still be able to
Speaker 3: be adult about it and you handle the way you
Speaker 3: did and even him. I just I think that's impressive
Speaker 3: for your age.
Speaker 1: I'd be like, come with me, And that's like normally, I,
Speaker 1: even my younger self, was very manipulative with men, not
Speaker 1: in like a scary way, like you know, if I
Speaker 1: wanted to get something like I'd be able to figure
Speaker 1: it out. And there wasn't ever a thought of like, well,
Speaker 1: maybe there's a way I can change his mind. I
Speaker 1: was like, no, this is like my journey that I'm
Speaker 1: supposed to be on. So if it wasn't for him
Speaker 1: making that decision, like I wouldn't have had this like
Speaker 1: life changing month long trip. I never in a million
Speaker 1: years would have been like let me go to Europe
Speaker 1: by myself. It was such an out of my comfort
Speaker 1: zone experience, like with a backpack, like not even luggage.
Speaker 1: It was very completely new for me, and I learned
Speaker 1: more about myself on that trip than I had.
Speaker 2: Yeah, what was the one thing that you were shocked
Speaker 2: to learn about yourself?
Speaker 1: Then I'm never really alone and I'm always okay because
Speaker 1: no matter who in my life may abandon me, I'll
Speaker 1: never abandon myself. And that was huge to like start
Speaker 1: those abandonment wounds to heal.
Speaker 7: It's like crazy because a lot of people have to
Speaker 7: do a lot of therapy and a lot of rehabit
Speaker 7: to like get where you are. And I feel like
Speaker 7: that's like amazing that you could just go on a
Speaker 7: trip and really find that in yourself.
Speaker 1: Like yeah, I mean, and don't get me wrong, like
Speaker 1: I've been in and out of therapy my whole life.
Speaker 1: I'm like an advocate of it. I think everybody should go,
Speaker 1: even if nothing's wrong, like go talk about some stuff.
Speaker 1: But yeah, it really I knew that I was going
Speaker 1: to like do some serious work on myself, and and
Speaker 1: through writing the book, it really like brought so much
Speaker 1: out that I was surprised about that I could then
Speaker 1: look at and go back and heal on my own,
Speaker 1: which was huge for me.
Speaker 2: Wow. So the relationship, now, what's different because you guys
Speaker 2: with vier no no, no, with your man.
Speaker 1: Now, oh oh right right, I know I was gonna
Speaker 1: the very handsome man that you. So we have had
Speaker 1: an interesting courtships. Yeah, because we I'm showing the picture. Okay,
Speaker 1: we actually met ten years ago. He played my older
Speaker 1: brother in a film Love and but have always been
Speaker 1: kind of just like friends on social media and whatever
Speaker 1: and kind of like Javier, Yeah, you know, interesting, that's
Speaker 1: how they that's how they come back and he saw
Speaker 1: the picture I posted the day I left for Europe
Speaker 1: of me with my backpack like explaining this whole cheating
Speaker 1: and divorce situation and like kind of airing all my
Speaker 1: stuff out, and he messaged me and was like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, I'm so sorry, like I'm I can't believe
Speaker 1: what I'm reading, blah blah blah, like when you get back,
Speaker 1: please let me know, like I'd love to take you
Speaker 1: to lunch. Not at all, you know, like that. He
Speaker 1: we had always like this very brother sister feel to us,
Speaker 1: and we ended up like running into each other, not
Speaker 1: even I know he's a good looking dude, not even
Speaker 1: like planning it, running into each other when we when
Speaker 1: I came home and I was like, yo, I'm not
Speaker 1: ready for a relationship, like don't even like a big
Speaker 1: wall like and he was like he was like, okay,
Speaker 1: that's cool, I'll wait. And ended out he was the
Speaker 1: first person to read the book, like before my mom,
Speaker 1: and so I remember, you know, two months in of
Speaker 1: us kind of like hanging out but like not really yeah,
Speaker 1: and he was like, I've never had a roadmap of
Speaker 1: the girl I'm trying to court, and I'm literally reading
Speaker 1: all of this stuff about and he was just like,
Speaker 1: first of all, I want to murder the two men,
Speaker 1: and he's just he's a really great guy and sees
Speaker 1: me for me. I've never been able to be more
Speaker 1: myself with someone and and he's okay with like me
Speaker 1: taking it day by day, like not having to have
Speaker 1: like a end game goal and just kind of like
Speaker 1: being together and being in the moment. But he's definitely
Speaker 1: like one of my sole people. And I feel that
Speaker 1: way about Javier too. I think I don't really believe
Speaker 1: in soul mates as in like lovers and my husband,
Speaker 1: but but I believe in like soul people that come
Speaker 1: into your lives to, you know, drastically either teach you
Speaker 1: something or change or like be a catalyst for something
Speaker 1: that you're supposed to learn. And both of them, Javier
Speaker 1: and my current guy, I love that.
Speaker 8: No, you're mate, yea one and only, but both of them,
Speaker 8: Javier and my my current guy, I met years before.
Speaker 1: So Javier and I had met six years before, and
Speaker 1: my current relationship and I had met ten years before.
Speaker 1: So and I that's a testament to me to like
Speaker 1: soul people. It's like they come in and it's like no,
Speaker 1: this isn't the right time, and they come back so
Speaker 1: much later and it's really you know, to to affect you.
Speaker 1: And I feel like there's you know, not to get
Speaker 1: into the whole past lives thing, but I truly feel
Speaker 1: with certain people that I meet that like I've been
Speaker 1: with them in other places. Are your mothers are so
Speaker 1: like ridiculously she read She actually when she read the book,
Speaker 1: she called me and was like in tears and she
Speaker 1: was like I was talking to a bunch of my
Speaker 1: clients about like self love and how to explain it clearly,
Speaker 1: and she's like, it's such a hard concept to really explain.
Speaker 1: And then I finished the couple of last pages of
Speaker 1: your book and it was right there in my daughter's
Speaker 1: work and I was like, oh, I'm like, see I
Speaker 1: actually learned something from you. It's a very like proud
Speaker 1: moment for her.
Speaker 2: So it was cool, so sweet.
Speaker 4: Wow.
Speaker 2: So they made it Eat Prey Love into movies. I
Speaker 2: don't say why they can't make Eat Prey Hashi Fmo
Speaker 2: into movies. You know, it would be really funny, but
Speaker 2: also like again like healing and yeah, and it's.
Speaker 1: It's written kind of like a Netflix series. We're kind
Speaker 1: of like it's been in discussion that we're thinking of
Speaker 1: like a ten episode type thing because it's written as
Speaker 1: a as a show kind of like you feel like
Speaker 1: you're reading something you should be watching. That's just kind
Speaker 1: of how I write. So yeah, and.
Speaker 2: That's what you're doing, your writer. You're an actress. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you're kind of like doing everything. We're in all the hats.
Speaker 2: What what like? What do you want if you can
Speaker 2: do just like the one thing you just want to
Speaker 2: act in your own thing that you write or.
Speaker 1: No, I really I've directed two projects now and I
Speaker 1: really love that it. I love having some control over
Speaker 1: what the finishing product is going to end up to
Speaker 1: because you know, as an actress, you're like, great, I'm
Speaker 1: going to show up and do my work, but like
Speaker 1: God only knows what this is going to look.
Speaker 2: Like or why did they use that scene? Oh because
Speaker 2: they needed like this thing to look like the acting
Speaker 2: isn't there?
Speaker 1: Yeah whatever. Yeah, So directing it's really nice because you
Speaker 1: can like have some control over the product you're making.
Speaker 1: So I would love if this went to series to
Speaker 1: not play myself in it. I would love to direct it.
Speaker 2: Hello, Yeah, Mike can be my Javier and stop.
Speaker 3: Oh God, don't make me the first guy.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I mean, okay.
Speaker 1: Such a long way.
Speaker 2: I mean, come on, No, I don't want to like
Speaker 2: go like somber because it's this has like been awesome.
Speaker 2: But with your dad, I mean, how have you been
Speaker 2: able to?
Speaker 7: You know?
Speaker 2: I think because girls it's hard. I've I had daddy
Speaker 2: issues for a long time. He didn't die, but I
Speaker 2: felt like he kind of abandoned me, But with yours,
Speaker 2: it's like he'd passed. So it's how did you because
Speaker 2: you never you're not able to talk to him or
Speaker 2: you can.
Speaker 1: But yeah, but not in the Yeah, there's no way
Speaker 1: to like get closure necessarily from him directly.
Speaker 2: Or to have like some like that father figure there.
Speaker 2: So do you feel like you were always trying to
Speaker 2: like search for that?
Speaker 1: I mean that's why I've always had men in my life,
Speaker 1: because I was trying to fill that hole that was
Speaker 1: left when he died. And it was even not even
Speaker 1: just in relationships, like I never wanted to be alone,
Speaker 1: Like even if it was like a roommate or my
Speaker 1: mom or my friends, it was me not being okay
Speaker 1: with myself. And it wasn't until I realized that I
Speaker 1: needed to go fix that for I could be in
Speaker 1: a space with someone else in a relationship. So I think,
Speaker 1: you know, there's no like said answer as far as
Speaker 1: grief goes. It happened when I was seven. My dad
Speaker 1: remember it, I do. I remember it vividly. I write
Speaker 1: about it in the beginning of the book how I
Speaker 1: was the one that found him. My mom was like
Speaker 1: off shooting in New Zealand and had to fly home.
Speaker 1: It was like really traumatic for a child. So I
Speaker 1: do remember it, but I'm kind of thankful in the
Speaker 1: way that it didn't happen when I was old enough
Speaker 1: to have like serious emotions around it. Like if that
Speaker 1: would have happened when I was a teenager, like my
Speaker 1: mom lost her father when she was sixteen, I don't know,
Speaker 1: like that would have been harder for me to handle.
Speaker 1: I think so while it did implement certain abandonment issues
Speaker 1: in my life, it it wasn't the hardest emotional thing
Speaker 1: to get to get over. I mean, obviously it's it's
Speaker 1: sad and I feel it and I cry, and I
Speaker 1: had years time really does heal a lot, But yeah,
Speaker 1: I think it's it's about finding what those wounds trigger
Speaker 1: in yourself, Like as an adult and being able to
Speaker 1: kind of like peel the layers back and see what's
Speaker 1: at the root of it and then start working on
Speaker 1: that part.
Speaker 2: So where can our listeners Instagram all of it, eat prey,
Speaker 2: hashtag FML.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I Amazon primed it, so yeah. So it's on Prime.
Speaker 1: It's exclusively on Amazon. It's in paperback and ebook. I
Speaker 1: don't know if I'm allowed to say this yet, but
Speaker 1: oh well, I just signed an audio book deal for it.
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 7: So is it you reading it? Like, oh, that's so
Speaker 7: cool when people do, that's so cool. And you can
Speaker 7: download audible.
Speaker 1: To hear that degree. Yeah that that won't be out
Speaker 1: till like later later this year. But yeah, it's on
Speaker 1: Amazon for paperback and ebook. And I'm at Gabrielle Stone
Speaker 1: the books at eat pre FML and whenever people read
Speaker 1: and send me messages and stuff, I love to repost it.
Speaker 1: I love hearing all the feedback from people. It's been
Speaker 1: really really rewarding to hear how it's starting to resonate with.
Speaker 7: Oh, I'm I feel like that's everything that you're writing
Speaker 7: about is so relatable. Like that's what's crazy is that,
Speaker 7: whether people know it or not, it's like like you
Speaker 7: said a life.
Speaker 2: We all have to find ourselves. Yeah, anyday, whether you've
Speaker 2: been in a bad relationship or whatever you're going through,
Speaker 2: it's all about finding yourself, yeah, in the journey.
Speaker 1: So and it's it's not just like a self help
Speaker 1: book either. It's like fun and you'll laugh and maybe
Speaker 1: cry and get.
Speaker 2: A lot of favorite place in Italy you went, last question?
Speaker 1: Oh god, Well I went everywhere. I didn't just do Italy,
Speaker 1: which was the one silver lining of not going with
Speaker 1: Pavier was I got to see a lot more. My
Speaker 1: favorite place that was probably Barcelona. Yeah, I met some
Speaker 1: incredible people there, but it like my heart, like really
Speaker 1: felt at home there. And I loved Amsterdam too. I
Speaker 1: think it gets a bad rap because everyone's like, oh,
Speaker 1: you can go joint and it's the canals and why
Speaker 1: go across the world. No, it's beautiful, architects, amazing, amazing
Speaker 1: and the people that are so so sweet.
Speaker 2: So yeah, well thanks for coming on the show. We're
Speaker 2: doing dinner tonight right, Yes, wait, Okay, isn't she so sweet?
Speaker 3: She's a chip off the old block. Even from the
Speaker 3: small small interactions I had with her mom d on
Speaker 3: the movie set, She's definitely chip off the old block.
Speaker 3: But she was fantastic.
Speaker 2: I knew she was a scorpion. I knew it.
Speaker 1: I just knew.
Speaker 7: I could just tell by like the way she was
Speaker 7: talking about like her relationships and her and her I
Speaker 7: just knew.
Speaker 1: I just knew.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 2: I love to have just quizzed you on that, since
Speaker 2: you think you're the Google I love.
Speaker 3: On the topic of I'm all about I've been very
Speaker 3: interested in like trips to find yourself same.
Speaker 2: Z's and I don't I'm jealous of why are you less?
Speaker 5: Wait?
Speaker 2: But like by yourself or together by yourself? I know,
Speaker 2: don't you feel like sometimes kind of just miss the boat.
Speaker 3: Because I might go to Kilimanjaro, do killman Jaro next
Speaker 3: summer alone?
Speaker 7: What? Not?
Speaker 3: By myself?
Speaker 2: Hello? Oh, I'm sorry? Is this the first world? Okay,
Speaker 2: you've never said anything to me about this is literally.
Speaker 3: Just the other day. You haven't talked about it yet.
Speaker 3: But the topic about the trip I said, I'm thinking
Speaker 3: about it just came up.
Speaker 2: Where's Kilimanjaro? What Sarah?
Speaker 1: Do you know?
Speaker 7: Wait?
Speaker 1: Time out?
Speaker 2: Sarah is made in Africa.
Speaker 4: I think it's Yeah, I've confirmed it's in Africa.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I have a friend who did well.
Speaker 3: But either way you can have to get some shots.
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh yeah, and you have to do like training. Wait,
Speaker 2: what is Kilimanjaro? Isn't it like as a mountain? A mountain?
Speaker 2: It's not like Everest, but it's like that, like I had. Okay,
Speaker 2: it starts with kill kill Himanjaya kill Vianjaro.
Speaker 1: No, I have a girlfriend.
Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure who did it. And they had to
Speaker 2: do like training, like hiking, breathing.
Speaker 3: All that you be in shape.
Speaker 7: No, no, but I swear I think she had to
Speaker 7: do like special whatever, wap time out?
Speaker 2: When?
Speaker 5: Where? What?
Speaker 1: How?
Speaker 5: What?
Speaker 1: Bucket list?
Speaker 3: Like bringing it up on here? Defense? Do you witnesses
Speaker 3: of what?
Speaker 2: I'm just curious, like who's the conversation with Jason? Jason?
Speaker 3: Who Jason? My best friend? Jason?
Speaker 2: Oh that Jason. I don't know if his.
Speaker 3: Brother, his bud, his other buddy Callum from what.
Speaker 4: You fly to Tanzania and climb on kill was the
Speaker 4: tallest mountain in Africa?
Speaker 3: Yeah, And you know what's the thing. It's one of
Speaker 3: these things where you.
Speaker 2: Tell me you're already gonna go. This is Mike. He's
Speaker 2: already He already tells people he goes and then I'm like, okay,
Speaker 2: show me. Let me say I would love to, like,
Speaker 2: let's do it.
Speaker 3: Let's yeah. I'm like, I'm all about it. I would
Speaker 3: love to. Let's get some more information. So then I
Speaker 3: get information, then I bring it to you. I don't
Speaker 3: want to be like, hey, I want to hike kill
Speaker 3: Jar one day and you'll be like, Okay, he just
Speaker 3: did that exactly today.
Speaker 2: That's what I'm doing life trips, you know.
Speaker 3: I saw this thing. It was uh I think it
Speaker 3: was the NFL Awards Honors last year and Chris Long,
Speaker 3: who's with the Egos and I think he's retired now,
Speaker 3: he does this. He did a mission like every year
Speaker 3: to Mount Kilim Majarro with a bunch of NFL guys
Speaker 3: that would go and hike it, and just the whole
Speaker 3: video like behind it and just what these guys experienced
Speaker 3: like when they did it and got to the top
Speaker 3: and took the picture. It was just something like ever since,
Speaker 3: like last summer when the NFL Awards on A show
Speaker 3: was on, I was like, man, that would be really cool.
Speaker 3: In the fact that Jason just texted me like a
Speaker 3: few days ago about it, it just kind of retriggered
Speaker 3: that mindset. I was like, man, that'd just be something
Speaker 3: I've never done anything for myself like that. It'd just
Speaker 3: be something I'd want to talk about.
Speaker 2: Would you do it by yourself?
Speaker 3: What do you mean by myself?
Speaker 2: Would you go by yourself? I think they have like
Speaker 2: guides and stuff. No, no, no, no, I'm saying, like, is
Speaker 2: it would you go on that trip solo? Are you
Speaker 2: going to Tanzania purely by myself? Yeah? Like, because like
Speaker 2: would she Gabrielle did, like she went to a you know,
Speaker 2: foreign country by herself, because that a lot of people
Speaker 2: say that to really soul seek solo is solo because that's.
Speaker 7: Your your alone in your thoughts. You're alone in you know,
Speaker 7: in those moments, you're alone in the darkness, you're alone
Speaker 7: in all those things.
Speaker 3: Two things, first thing is traveling around by yourself is
Speaker 3: one thing. Hiking, but doing hiking and doing something like that,
Speaker 3: you need you're still with the you need a base camp,
Speaker 3: you need like you have a guide, you have people
Speaker 3: around you, like, and you're still you're not talking the
Speaker 3: whole time you're walking up because you're sitting there. You
Speaker 3: don't want to.
Speaker 2: Exist and that I'm just like asking, like, no, I'm.
Speaker 3: Just explaining why I would not just go by myself,
Speaker 3: because it's still hiking, physical activity that could be dangerous
Speaker 3: that I would want people I trust around me, you
Speaker 3: know what I mean. I don't want to be like, hey,
Speaker 3: me and this tour guide who I don't know, maybe
Speaker 3: barely speaks English, but if something happens to.
Speaker 2: Me for sure, Yeah, I just because when you say
Speaker 2: like going on and a soul search thing to me,
Speaker 2: like from like, I think people have those aha moments
Speaker 2: and those things like when they're doing things by themselves.
Speaker 3: For sure, but I think it's also for me. It's
Speaker 3: not even necessarily soul searching because I know who I
Speaker 3: am nowadays, but it's more of a soul It's more
Speaker 3: of a soul cleansing. It's like just something just to
Speaker 3: like bring you back to neutral, to appreciate the things
Speaker 3: around you, reset your system, to get out of all
Speaker 3: the la and travel and everything that we do. And
Speaker 3: it's just it is because it's still just me and
Speaker 3: my thoughts hiking up this mountain accomplishing something for sure
Speaker 3: sounds hard.
Speaker 1: See.
Speaker 2: I would always love to do a trip. I just
Speaker 2: don't think I couldn't be alone. I couldn't do it,
Speaker 2: I know, but I think I would thrive. I think
Speaker 2: i'd I've had a version of myself if I went solo.
Speaker 2: I agree, I couldn't. I could. I would come back
Speaker 2: and being like I am the independent, I'm the I
Speaker 2: freaking did it. Because you're feel so proud of your
Speaker 2: I would feel say so proud of myself. I agree,
Speaker 2: I could like cry, No, my girlfriend just did it.
Speaker 7: She went to South America, traveled for like a year
Speaker 7: by herself, came home thriving. Now this bitch is moving
Speaker 7: a BALI like she's killing the game, and I'm like, wow,
Speaker 7: three years No, three years ago she was in a
Speaker 7: five year relationship like she was in it and it's
Speaker 7: just like but it's it's also just like where do
Speaker 7: you you know? It's different lanes and I just I couldn't.
Speaker 7: I think it's cool, but I couldn't. I'd rather go
Speaker 7: to like a ranch or a spa and find myself there.
Speaker 7: But sometime she's like, come visit me. I'm like, let
Speaker 7: me know when you hit the ritz Carlton, and I'll
Speaker 7: hit you there. I think I would have a better
Speaker 7: chance of like if I went somewhere in the States
Speaker 7: for three months. I could probably do that. Like I
Speaker 7: could go live in like somewhere random, but leaving the country.
Speaker 3: That's where I would differ to me that would do nothing.
Speaker 3: Then I would be lonely and bored. If you go
Speaker 3: to somewhere experienced, like a new country that has things
Speaker 3: that are centuries older than our our continent, our country does,
Speaker 3: It's like that's something that would get my my juice
Speaker 3: is flowing and like this is something that I experienced.
Speaker 3: If I go to Des Moines, Iowa for three months,
Speaker 3: but no, no, no searching right.
Speaker 7: Now, I would go to like I could go to
Speaker 7: like Montana or like Wyoming or Colorado, Like I could
Speaker 7: go do something like that for three months and just
Speaker 7: be like, you know, no, so but I could really
Speaker 7: months or a month or.
Speaker 2: Two what like five days?
Speaker 7: Oh no, Like I'm saying I could go for like
Speaker 7: a month or two Oh really, but I couldn't leave
Speaker 7: the country.
Speaker 2: I can wait on that. I'm like, I wouldn't go
Speaker 2: like I would.
Speaker 3: It would have to be far.
Speaker 2: But at the same time that I think about the kids,
Speaker 2: and I'm like, I could never leave my kids.
Speaker 7: No. I feel like when you do that, you have
Speaker 7: to be like her, like no husband, no kids, like
Speaker 7: out here doing it.
Speaker 3: To do all that. Yeah, I mean that to point you.
Speaker 3: Like my friend that that texted me about going. He
Speaker 3: lives in We grew up and we went to high
Speaker 3: school together as my best friend growing up. He moved
Speaker 3: to London or to England for medical school. Hasn't come
Speaker 3: back after college. He fell in love with it over
Speaker 3: It has an accent everything now because he's been there forever, which.
Speaker 2: By the way, always like you're American, but I can see.
Speaker 3: I can save a British But I can see how
Speaker 3: if you spend like a decade over there, you're gonna
Speaker 3: start naturally kind of talking that way.
Speaker 2: But you talk like this because we're like moving to Nashville.
Speaker 3: We live here, but things like that, I'll start coming out.
Speaker 3: Look at Schwarzenegger.
Speaker 4: He's been in thirty years and he still sounds like
Speaker 4: he just got here from Austria.
Speaker 3: Different, I guess, but he goes when he just has
Speaker 3: a few days, he'll go to down the country like
Speaker 3: that by himself. He'll have nothing planning. And so that
Speaker 3: part of me too feels comfortable going with someone who
Speaker 3: travels all of the time, who does this by themselves.
Speaker 2: You know how I feel about him though, Oh oh,
Speaker 2: he's mean to you. I don't like how he jokes.
Speaker 2: I get you, he's he's very mean to him and
Speaker 2: it makes me it really it bothers me because her
Speaker 2: I get for my man but puts him down. Twenty
Speaker 2: fourth every time I've been around him, like he puts
Speaker 2: him down, I'm like, how are you gonna go find
Speaker 2: your Like, here's the thing. If you said somebody else,
Speaker 2: I'd be like, go. But my hesitation with it is
Speaker 2: I don't want you to go to have this thing
Speaker 2: and he's gonna put you down the entire time you're
Speaker 2: walking up a mountain, because I don't want to pun
Speaker 2: him off the mountain.
Speaker 1: Oh wait, if.
Speaker 2: He says something to you like he's just like he's like,
Speaker 2: oh like he's just mean, and it's like that's their
Speaker 2: way of joking. But I'm like, that's not nice, like
Speaker 2: maybe unhappy. Well, I think there's other things going there
Speaker 2: that I'll say off the record, but yeah, that's mine.
Speaker 2: You think he's mean to you, No, it's our relationship.
Speaker 3: We've always just ragged on each other. It's one of
Speaker 3: those things we'll go with. We could go without talking
Speaker 3: for a year, and the first thing we did is
Speaker 3: bust each other's balls. And it's one of those things
Speaker 3: because because we don't talk, because we live in separate countries,
Speaker 3: we don't talk as much because we have opposite hours.
Speaker 3: But when we do get past and we do talk
Speaker 3: for a while, we get past all that initial like
Speaker 3: jab jabbing back and forth.
Speaker 1: It mean to you.
Speaker 2: He's never once asked me a question, not once. That's
Speaker 2: another reason.
Speaker 3: And how many times have.
Speaker 2: Have I asked any questions? When it came to our house, I.
Speaker 3: Was asking question, have we seen this man?
Speaker 2: It doesn't matter, but he's been he's been in my
Speaker 2: house and he's never asked me. He's not once asked
Speaker 2: me a question. I'm sorry he was in your house
Speaker 2: and he didn't. His brother talked to me more than
Speaker 2: he talked to me, So again I have he's mean
Speaker 2: to you, and he doesn't ask any questions, and he
Speaker 2: doesn't care to get to know me.
Speaker 7: So yeah, maybe he's scared of you. No, I think
Speaker 7: he loves Michael.
Speaker 2: I'm just saying.
Speaker 7: I think Mark, just I'm not going anywhere near that.
Speaker 2: I think Mark.
Speaker 3: Pause.
Speaker 4: The pause was so beautiful, the silence I've never enjoyed
Speaker 4: silence more on a podcast than right there.
Speaker 5: If we're gonna find out in Tanzania, he's gonna go
Speaker 5: find himself and say, you know, because like Ban, I
Speaker 5: wouldn't even be upset if you Mike came back gay
Speaker 5: with him.
Speaker 7: I I am not saying a word. The the the
Speaker 7: the interweb is going to have a field day with this.
Speaker 1: I'm crying. Look, Mike, Mike, I need.
Speaker 3: Honestly, honestly, here's the thing. We thought, No, there's you're
Speaker 3: lying even even there's no thought. Even me and his
Speaker 3: brother had conversations on whether his older brother who him
Speaker 3: and I are really tight too, about whether or not
Speaker 3: he may be like men, which is obviously fine either.
Speaker 7: Way, but it makes sense why he doesn't like me.
Speaker 7: I'm just saying, like the swallow, it's so quiet.
Speaker 3: We just heard my My thing is after even talking
Speaker 3: to some people about it, even like my therapist about it,
Speaker 3: and talking to my friend himself more, not bringing up
Speaker 3: is like to me, what I've kind of open my
Speaker 3: eyes to is it's about his priorities in life. My
Speaker 3: priorities in life have been to have a family, have
Speaker 3: a wife, have kids. He's that person. He with his
Speaker 3: free time, he wants to experience the world.
Speaker 2: How do we get out a lot of.
Speaker 3: That is what is important to him. So because I
Speaker 3: don't think he actually is, that's my point is just
Speaker 3: because he doesn't have a relationship or doesn't, I don't
Speaker 3: think that that all I'm saying is that's why I
Speaker 3: don't think he is.
Speaker 7: I was going to say sometimes like maybe when it's
Speaker 7: a friend from the beginning, like he just ride or
Speaker 7: dies so hard for Mike that he's probably just like
Speaker 7: if this beat, you know what I mean, Like not
Speaker 7: in that way, but.
Speaker 3: But to that point too. When we were in London
Speaker 3: when you're playing the O two Arena, Sick and I went.
Speaker 2: And it was a side stage.
Speaker 1: It wasn't that big either way.
Speaker 3: She still play. That's a big deal. Me and my buddy,
Speaker 3: you know, he lives in England. So we went out
Speaker 3: and uh walked around and stuff like that. And because
Speaker 3: he is he has been my boy since like thirty one.
Speaker 3: He had a little bit about that. But that was
Speaker 3: when we were Jane and I were like.
Speaker 7: I feel like, you know, he's obviously taking your side
Speaker 7: and he's obviously and.
Speaker 2: He was just like, what did I do to not
Speaker 2: have him like me. It's not fair.
Speaker 3: It's not about that. It's not it's not it's about
Speaker 3: it's about seeing your friend irregardless of everything else going on,
Speaker 3: seeing your friend and pain.
Speaker 2: Senior friends about when we came to our house with
Speaker 2: his hand, mom and brother.
Speaker 7: Agreed like at a certain age. Hi, but I feel like,
Speaker 7: what did I do wrong?
Speaker 2: If I messed? If I like hurt him, but I
Speaker 2: didn't hurt him, so like maybe he thinks he did. Well,
Speaker 2: love to know the stories, That's what I'm you know
Speaker 2: what I mean?
Speaker 7: Like you never told him no, not no, not you,
Speaker 7: but do you know like sometimes our friends like regardless
Speaker 7: of what, like your friend's gonna, you know, have your back.
Speaker 7: I think it's if I were the one that did
Speaker 7: the wrong doing, then yeah, I could totally see that,
Speaker 7: but not if I didn't do the wrong doing. And Hi,
Speaker 7: you just came to my house and we have another
Speaker 7: kid in here, and like you know, like be more friendly.
Speaker 7: You no say hi and ask one question? Not where
Speaker 7: the is the bathroom?
Speaker 2: You know what I mean?
Speaker 4: So I know, well, well, I don't think we have
Speaker 4: time for emails.
Speaker 2: I don't know you, I don't.
Speaker 3: Know so anyways, I'll report next year from the top
Speaker 3: of killay.
Speaker 2: I just looked it up, because you need five nine days.
Speaker 4: Dr Romney was in Johannesburgh. You can and kill him
Speaker 4: and jar we'll skype you down.
Speaker 2: Why don't you like start with like Machu pichu. Isn't
Speaker 2: that a little easier?
Speaker 3: All or nothing?
Speaker 2: Okay, all right, if it's something you really want to do, well,
Speaker 2: obviously we'll we'll chat about it. Look at the calendar,
Speaker 2: you know. All right, Well this has been fun, but
Speaker 2: one done later.