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Speaker 1: Welcome to Carefully Reckless, the production of Our Heart Radio

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Speaker 1: and the Black Effect, and just like that, welcome back

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Speaker 1: to got another Carefully Reckless episode with your girl. Just

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Speaker 1: hilarious to be on the air. We're gonna jump right in.

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Speaker 1: We got a lot of voice notes, so listen y'all.

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Speaker 1: Good morning Jazz. I know it's early as fun, but

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Speaker 1: I've been meaning to send you this voice note because

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Speaker 1: I need you to help me figure out my mess,

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Speaker 1: like how I'll hit you with that one to not

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Speaker 1: fix my mess, figure that ship out because my motherfucking

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Speaker 1: confused over here. Sorry for the party mouth. I know

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Speaker 1: it's early, but before I go into details, I must say, bitch,

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Speaker 1: I love you like a motherfucker, like you're my inspiration,

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Speaker 1: my motivation and I'm an upcoming influenca entertaining myself. Anyways,

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Speaker 1: No free Pomo. I know you don't play that ship,

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Speaker 1: but I tatd this girl in high schoo and she

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Speaker 1: wasn't gay. You know, just most gay girls just feel

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Speaker 1: like they can get any straight girl they want, no

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Speaker 1: matter what, that they can turn the bitch out like

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Speaker 1: girls staying your motherfucking lane and keep it pushing, like

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Speaker 1: I learned my lesson. I respect my motherfucking caramel. So

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Speaker 1: any who, everybody just knew I couldn't get her. But

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Speaker 1: it's like I made that ship a motherfucking go I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna get this bitch like we'll be making that ship goes.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna get her. I'm gonna get her like knowing

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Speaker 1: that bitch may not be that interested for real, but

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Speaker 1: we're gonna make you that interested for it. We don't

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Speaker 1: give an especially to me and motherfucking Sagittarius, I don't

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Speaker 1: like anyways, that's the all me. We talked about it.

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Speaker 1: Oh me now anyway, So I've grown a lot, and

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Speaker 1: she played softball, so I became the softball manager just

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Speaker 1: so I could get closer to her and her behold,

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Speaker 1: believe it, her motherfucking not, they did, motherfucking words. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I got I got her at softball practice. I would

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Speaker 1: mess with her a lot, and then I was sitting

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Speaker 1: next to her on the bus for the softball trips.

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Speaker 1: I remember one time she was on the phone with

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Speaker 1: her mom and I thought she was on the phone

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Speaker 1: with her boyfriend. So I hung that ship up, hung

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Speaker 1: up in the mama motherfucking face, and I did not

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Speaker 1: give no fuss, even when I found out that was Mama,

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Speaker 1: because bitch, I'm sitting in the seat talking to you.

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Speaker 1: I want your undivided attention her mom. And that's another

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Speaker 1: little issue I had, like when we're talking, give me

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Speaker 1: your undivided attention. And this bitch would just get distracted

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Speaker 1: anytime I talked to her and be on her phone,

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Speaker 1: be doing this that in the third like, I want

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Speaker 1: your undivided attention because I'm gonna give it to you you

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Speaker 1: when you're talking. So I do others as I want done.

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Speaker 1: Unto me, it's what people don't understand and the thing

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Speaker 1: that we call life. So we're gonna move on, and

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Speaker 1: um we grew closer as the days went on. Of

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Speaker 1: course I kept messing with her. You know that little

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Speaker 1: play fighting ship turns into um that fucking ship. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I know you were doing that that girl. So one

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Speaker 1: day I went over to her house for the first

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Speaker 1: time to help her take her hair out. I ready

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Speaker 1: to do what the fun was going to go to out? Bitch.

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Speaker 1: I wasn't trying to go take the motherfucking hair out.

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Speaker 1: But that's the way. That's the coach. You get your

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Speaker 1: foot and the motherfucking do. So that's what I did.

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Speaker 1: Like the game has played, you already know Mama ain't

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Speaker 1: gonna care about a bitch coming over. So Boom went

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Speaker 1: over and helped her take her out. You know, we played,

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Speaker 1: and the playing were led to other things and that

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Speaker 1: was the night that baby was mine. After that, it

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Speaker 1: was over. It was raps. Now, let me tell you

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Speaker 1: where I sucked up. I expected her to be that

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Speaker 1: gay girlfriend as soon as we got into the relationship.

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Speaker 1: By me being gay, I expected her to pick up

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Speaker 1: on the gay things that I did to her and

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Speaker 1: expected her to do them back to me. That was

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Speaker 1: the huge issue of the whole relationship that made us

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Speaker 1: turn toxic. And I will admit that it was my

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Speaker 1: fault and take my accountability on it. It's like, when

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Speaker 1: she didn't do what I wanted and she wasn't giving

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Speaker 1: me the pleasure that I wanted, I want to got

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Speaker 1: that pleasure and things from outside parties and code for cheating.

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Speaker 1: Once that started happening, I started going to outside parties.

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Speaker 1: And that's really really when things started getting bad. And

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Speaker 1: you know, I stay with her. I loved her, but

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Speaker 1: I stay with her just because, first of all, when

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Speaker 1: she first found out. She came back. And that's the

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Speaker 1: problem that I feel like us as women have to

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Speaker 1: stop doing so these men don't be so comfortable to

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Speaker 1: do what they're do. We have too many women out

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Speaker 1: here that settle and just accept because they feel like

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Speaker 1: they won't find no one that will love them for them,

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Speaker 1: or that they're not worth it, they're not enough. And

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Speaker 1: when we do things like that, we or men or

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Speaker 1: whoever the other motherfucker party is he she adien. When

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Speaker 1: we do things like that, we don't realize that we

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Speaker 1: bringing our partner self esteem down and making them feel like, well,

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Speaker 1: what am I doing wrong? So she came back to

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Speaker 1: me the first time and she stayed. It was like

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Speaker 1: that was go for me, okay, ship, she ain't gonna leave,

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Speaker 1: She's gonna just come back. So I kept doing it.

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Speaker 1: And I'm not saying it was the right thing to do.

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Speaker 1: I'm just saying my motherfucking story because baby, I've grown,

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Speaker 1: Like I said, I accept my karma were and take

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Speaker 1: forward responsibility because baby, bitch, I'm motherfucking miserable. Okay, Okay,

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Speaker 1: So um, mind you has been three years. Oh I

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Speaker 1: know you do that sound a fake to? Yeah? The

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Speaker 1: relationship was just very toxic because throughout the relationship all

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Speaker 1: I did was cheap get that pleasure from those outside parties,

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Speaker 1: and she returned. Now, I'm not trying to make her

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Speaker 1: seem like no weak bitch, but that's what love do

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Speaker 1: to you. And sad to say, you know, we we

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Speaker 1: can't control temptation and comfortability. Sometimes we can't, but when

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Speaker 1: it's breaking point, this ship breaking point, and we did

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Speaker 1: eventually get to that breaking point. Um. I also had

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Speaker 1: a little temperate mother problem. I would get mad a lot.

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Speaker 1: I'm angry up until this day. I'm angry a whole

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Speaker 1: another story for another day. Um, dealing with family stuff

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Speaker 1: like with my father, I'm angry. So it caused me

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Speaker 1: to be angry and a lot of situations that didn't

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Speaker 1: need it to be and I would feel attacked all

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Speaker 1: the time when necessarily I wasn't always being attacked. So

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Speaker 1: with all of that, and the way that she was

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Speaker 1: raised and growing up and the things that she was

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Speaker 1: going through, it just didn't work. We both were going

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Speaker 1: through our own little separate situations and didn't realize that

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Speaker 1: we just needed to be a part and figure out

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Speaker 1: our situations instead of trying to do it together. It

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Speaker 1: wasn't working because we were so comfortable. But like I said,

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Speaker 1: we eventually did get to that breaking point and after

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Speaker 1: actually four years of being together, we broke up, and

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Speaker 1: that was about three years ago, and we both haven't

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Speaker 1: found anyone. We're still single and we're still friends to

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Speaker 1: this day. And it took us a while to get

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Speaker 1: to the point where we could be just friends. Of course,

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Speaker 1: because of everything that we've been through the history. It's hard,

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Speaker 1: you know, for couples to be friends afterwards. But if

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Speaker 1: you and that other party can agree to and come

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Speaker 1: to common mature grounds, then it can work. It just

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Speaker 1: depends on you and that other party. So it took

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Speaker 1: us three years to this day to get that together

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Speaker 1: because you know, I was the one that cheated, so

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Speaker 1: I was the one that felt the guilt and was

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Speaker 1: trying to get back with her while all alone. She

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Speaker 1: had moved on from the relationship from the first time

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Speaker 1: that I cheated. In reality, she was just there because

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Speaker 1: of comfort and of course she loved me, but the

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Speaker 1: relation ship was done the first time I cheated. All

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Speaker 1: trust was gone. And that's what others don't realize either.

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Speaker 1: So yes, just the mess that I need you to

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Speaker 1: help me figure out is why am I still single?

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Speaker 1: Why I feel like I've grown a whole heap of

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Speaker 1: motherfucking lot from being in the relationship with her. I

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Speaker 1: learned a lot. I learned what to do and what

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Speaker 1: not to do in a relationship, and not just I

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Speaker 1: honestly feel like and know for a fact that I

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Speaker 1: wouldn't ever in my life cheat on another person again,

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Speaker 1: like I really truly loved her, And of course you

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Speaker 1: don't realize that until after the fact. And I would

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Speaker 1: never ever want to see the person that I love

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Speaker 1: hurt and cry and knowing that I was the pain

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Speaker 1: and the reason. The after effects of all of that

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Speaker 1: is terrible and it's draining, and it's stressful in this depression,

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Speaker 1: and it's your mental health. You fucking wait. At that point,

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Speaker 1: I loasked about thirty pounds went from two hundred to

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Speaker 1: one sixty dealing with that after the fact of us

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Speaker 1: being uh not together anymore. So it was definitely, um,

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Speaker 1: it was a lot. And now I'm just trying to

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Speaker 1: figure out why am I still single? Like I said,

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Speaker 1: it's been three years and I still like I haven't

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Speaker 1: found no wine. I feel like I've grown a lot.

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Speaker 1: I've changed a lot. My whole life perspective has changed,

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Speaker 1: just with experience and everything I've been through. I grew

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Speaker 1: the funk up and it's like I've talked to females

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Speaker 1: since I've been with her, but it's like all of

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Speaker 1: it ends up not working out. Like the people I've tried.

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Speaker 1: This craziest funck be tried. I tried to motherfucker that

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Speaker 1: got shot, a motherfucker that's Bob Polar, motherfucker that motherfucker

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Speaker 1: tell me I'm too aggressive. And I had like a

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Speaker 1: nigga too much. And there were the ones that's really

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Speaker 1: fucked up in the head. They had secret kids on

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Speaker 1: the way and ship like I don't know. It's just confusing,

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Speaker 1: like why can't I find find love? And I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I feel like maybe I have to find myself first

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Speaker 1: before I find love or you know, figure out my

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Speaker 1: life and who I am as influencer, actress, brand ambassador, model,

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Speaker 1: public figure, motivational speaker, I do it all, most tolerant female,

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Speaker 1: and I just feel like because I'm on maybe my

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Speaker 1: little come up, then maybe that's the reason why I

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Speaker 1: haven't found no one, because you know, it gets lonely

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Speaker 1: when you're great and when you're meant to be successful

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Speaker 1: or a star in life, it gets lonely. And I

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Speaker 1: was listening to pretty v Well, just think about what

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Speaker 1: she said the other day actually, um, when we were

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Speaker 1: at the Revote summing in Atlanta, I know you were

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Speaker 1: there for a while now to a girl I love

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Speaker 1: like that, but yeah, she just mentioned that it gets

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Speaker 1: lonely on this journey. But you know you're gonna have

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Speaker 1: anxiety and you're gonna go through ship, but don't let

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Speaker 1: that determine you or be your whole life. And it's

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Speaker 1: just of course it's hard as ship, like as hard

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Speaker 1: as funk. I really be lonely as fun. And I

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Speaker 1: would go back and take certain people just because of

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Speaker 1: how lonely I am. Like that's another thing about us

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Speaker 1: as the human fucking population, Like we really would go

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Speaker 1: back and put up with the motherfucker that maybe put

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Speaker 1: our put their hands on us, cheated or made anything

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Speaker 1: that did anything wrong and just deal with them just

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Speaker 1: because of us being bored. And that that's another generational

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Speaker 1: cycle or so sociality. I don't know, social thing that

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Speaker 1: we have to break as a whole, Like it's not

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Speaker 1: a good thing. So yes, like Jess, I just I

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Speaker 1: just need help. I don't understand why I'm still singing

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Speaker 1: my doing something wrong. Like I talked to these different

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Speaker 1: girls and um, it's like it just never works out,

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Speaker 1: like our personalities just like I expect. They made me

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Speaker 1: feel like I'd be expecting too much, Like I'm not

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Speaker 1: from the lower my standards bitch. No, like I don't

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Speaker 1: be it, don't be too much. I just want undivided attention.

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Speaker 1: I want the motherfucker to show me that care. I

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Speaker 1: want the motherfucking rolls pedals in the hotel. I want

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Speaker 1: fucking all the little cute ship of flowers. I've never

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Speaker 1: received flowers like that's and that's a lot of things

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Speaker 1: that I always did in my last relationship that wasn't

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Speaker 1: necessarily always done to me as well, Like I don't

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Speaker 1: feel like my last relationship really was at one emotionally

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Speaker 1: affectionately wise like at all. And yeah, like I'm not

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Speaker 1: lowering my standards. I just I need motherfucker's to to

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Speaker 1: get right. But maybe I'm just happy to find my

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Speaker 1: person yet I don't know. And I'm still young. I'm

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Speaker 1: twenty three, so maybe that's another thing. I don't need

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Speaker 1: to be worrying about this because another thing that I

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Speaker 1: realized is when I stopped worrying about bitches, my life

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Speaker 1: gets better and my blessings come better and all of

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Speaker 1: that good stuff. So, yes, Jess, I really hope you

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Speaker 1: listen to this. I can't wait. I love you, boo,

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Speaker 1: and that's the end of my motherfucker's story period. Hold up,

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Speaker 1: Hold up, I know the ship getting good, But listen

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Speaker 1: to just a couple of seconds of a commercial with

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Speaker 1: your love me. You'll listen, Okay, So I love you too.

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Speaker 1: I want to tell you you have kept me entertained

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Speaker 1: throughout this whole ordeal, this whole story, from beginning to end,

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Speaker 1: and I do see a motherfucking future and stand up

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Speaker 1: for you, because child, you know how to tell a

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Speaker 1: story comical. Okay, all right, let's get down to some

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Speaker 1: serious ship. It's a couple of things. First of all,

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Speaker 1: you being twenty three, Yes, you are too young to

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Speaker 1: be worried about this ship right now, especially when you

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Speaker 1: want your come up. I wouldn't put little in front

246
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Speaker 1: of it, because it ain't nothing little about to come up.

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Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. You're you're gonna be wait,

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Speaker 1: further than you ever expected to be. You're very charismatic,

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Speaker 1: so I definitely get how you charm girls, but you

250
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Speaker 1: also are controlling. I hear it. You're you're very controlling, bitch.

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Speaker 1: You wanted this girl to get off the phone with

252
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Speaker 1: how my fucking mother to talk to you? How mother

253
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Speaker 1: could have been drowning? How mother? I don't know why

254
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Speaker 1: she would be on the phone if she was drowning,

255
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Speaker 1: But you get what the funk I'm saying. Is that

256
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Speaker 1: what I'm saying, that's a mother you thought she was

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Speaker 1: talking to. If I'm remembering right, you said that you

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Speaker 1: thought that she was talking to a guy at first,

259
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Speaker 1: or a girl or whatever. She was talking to her mom,

260
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Speaker 1: And you was like, I don't give a funk, even

261
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Speaker 1: if when even when I found out it was her mother,

262
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Speaker 1: I didn't give a fuck. You know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 1: How the funk would you feel if your mom was

264
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Speaker 1: on the phone with you? And the bitch was like,

265
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Speaker 1: I don't give a funk about your mother, Get all

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Speaker 1: that motherfucking phone and talk to me. Give me, first

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Speaker 1: of all, you give me female Ike Turner, if if

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00:14:28,280 --> 00:14:31,000
Speaker 1: you asked me, you know what I mean? And it's

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00:14:31,040 --> 00:14:33,600
Speaker 1: a couple of control of things that you've got going on.

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Speaker 1: But I also noticed that you also brought up your

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Speaker 1: dad as well, so you're still upset. You've got a

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Speaker 1: lot of animosity with a lot of family ship going on.

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Speaker 1: That could be where you're controlling issues stem from. That

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00:14:44,280 --> 00:14:47,320
Speaker 1: could be where your anger issues stem from. Straight up,

275
00:14:47,400 --> 00:14:49,000
Speaker 1: you already said it. You know what I mean. You

276
00:14:49,040 --> 00:14:51,720
Speaker 1: may need therapy for a lot of things. You may, also,

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Speaker 1: like you hinted towards, need to find yourself and figure

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Speaker 1: out who you are and what exactly you require to

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Speaker 1: even be loved. Because I think that attention, that undivided

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Speaker 1: attention that you long for so much for one person.

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Speaker 1: I think you wanted that from your father. I think

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Speaker 1: you probably wanted that from like your parents growing up.

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Speaker 1: You didn't really speak on your mom. But I think

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Speaker 1: what we do as human beings we lack, we go

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Speaker 1: without these basics, like these essentials for so long. Is

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Speaker 1: now that we're adults and we grow up and we

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Speaker 1: try to love and we try to be intimate and

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Speaker 1: have these relationships that we don't realize that we lack

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Speaker 1: until we are in love with somebody and we realize

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00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:38,480
Speaker 1: that we don't have something that we should have been

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Speaker 1: had before we jumped in a relationship, so you try

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Speaker 1: to blame it on other people. I don't think you

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Speaker 1: should lower your standards, no, but I think you should

294
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Speaker 1: find who you are. Your standards are not. The problem

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00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:52,360
Speaker 1: is what you require. You require too much from a female,

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00:15:52,840 --> 00:15:56,920
Speaker 1: you do, and then too fast. Girl. You became a

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00:15:56,960 --> 00:15:59,280
Speaker 1: softball coach to get close to this bitch and she

298
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Speaker 1: wouldn't even get That was a lesson that you learned.

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Speaker 1: You said it at the beginning. You can't turn every

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Speaker 1: straight bitch all the way gay. You can't do that.

301
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Speaker 1: I was in love with a female before, but I

302
00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:14,080
Speaker 1: never touched or looked at another female after her. But

303
00:16:14,120 --> 00:16:17,520
Speaker 1: that female couldn't make me gay. I just liked her.

304
00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:20,040
Speaker 1: I knew I still wanted some day. I knew I

305
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:23,400
Speaker 1: still wanted to explore the dating pool of men. I

306
00:16:23,480 --> 00:16:26,160
Speaker 1: just was obsessed with this one girl. I didn't want

307
00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:28,720
Speaker 1: no more pussy after that, I didn't. I didn't even

308
00:16:28,720 --> 00:16:30,840
Speaker 1: want her pussy. She wanted mine, and she got that

309
00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:34,120
Speaker 1: mothercker too. But after that, it was no more of that.

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Speaker 1: You understand what I'm saying. So when you say I

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Speaker 1: felt like my last relationship, I wasn't reciprocated. Yeah, because

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00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:45,040
Speaker 1: she wasn't gay. She wasn't able to give you what

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00:16:45,120 --> 00:16:48,200
Speaker 1: you gave her. You went in already knowing your sexuality.

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00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:52,360
Speaker 1: She didn't know. She was curious, bi, curious, a little

315
00:16:52,360 --> 00:16:54,560
Speaker 1: bit gay, lot of gay whatever. She wasn't as far

316
00:16:55,160 --> 00:16:57,080
Speaker 1: into it as you was. She didn't know where her

317
00:16:57,120 --> 00:16:59,720
Speaker 1: sexual preference was. She was just trying to ship she

318
00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:02,240
Speaker 1: and up liking it, but not liking it enough to

319
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Speaker 1: be gay. That's why I think she didn't give you

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00:17:06,080 --> 00:17:08,920
Speaker 1: what you wanted her to give you. She didn't give

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Speaker 1: you everything that you gave her, you know, in a

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Speaker 1: sense of just being in a relationship with her. Now

323
00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:17,919
Speaker 1: we got a commercial, and if you click off of

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00:17:17,920 --> 00:17:20,520
Speaker 1: this podcast, I swear I'm gonna beat your ass. Listen,

325
00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:24,840
Speaker 1: why are you still single? You want me to tell

326
00:17:24,920 --> 00:17:28,400
Speaker 1: you why you're still single? You're twenty three, You don't

327
00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:30,600
Speaker 1: know who you are yet, you still got issues to

328
00:17:30,720 --> 00:17:34,720
Speaker 1: resolve that are deeply rooted, and you can't hold nobody

329
00:17:34,760 --> 00:17:37,080
Speaker 1: else accountable for what the funk you had going on.

330
00:17:37,520 --> 00:17:39,520
Speaker 1: You don't even know what you got going on. You

331
00:17:39,560 --> 00:17:41,440
Speaker 1: understand what I'm saying. I think you need to see

332
00:17:41,440 --> 00:17:44,160
Speaker 1: a therapist. I think you have such a big personality

333
00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:47,520
Speaker 1: and you're so passionate about this ship. You need to

334
00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:50,639
Speaker 1: do it carefully. You're so passionate about being with someone.

335
00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:53,360
Speaker 1: You need to be careful. You need to do it right.

336
00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:56,000
Speaker 1: You said somebody told you that you back like a nigga.

337
00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:59,479
Speaker 1: You do. That's not necessarily bad, but you do. I

338
00:17:59,520 --> 00:18:02,119
Speaker 1: think you need to focus on yourself. You're twenty three,

339
00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:06,600
Speaker 1: give yourself, realistically until seven to be in another relationship.

340
00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:08,400
Speaker 1: I know you don't want to hear that ship that's

341
00:18:08,440 --> 00:18:11,399
Speaker 1: four years away, you know, from now. But I think

342
00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:14,840
Speaker 1: the greater good in all this is that you're on

343
00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:18,040
Speaker 1: a come up and you don't have time for distractions.

344
00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:20,440
Speaker 1: You just said it at the end of this message.

345
00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:24,920
Speaker 1: You said, when I focus on bitches, I'm distracted or no,

346
00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:29,920
Speaker 1: no, no no, verbatimly, you said, when I ain't focusing on bitches,

347
00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:32,960
Speaker 1: when my mind ain't on bitches, I do so much

348
00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:35,880
Speaker 1: better in life and all of that ship. Don't focus

349
00:18:36,160 --> 00:18:39,680
Speaker 1: on bitches, as you would say, don't focus on women,

350
00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:42,480
Speaker 1: don't focus on a relationship. But if you really really

351
00:18:42,960 --> 00:18:45,000
Speaker 1: tired of being lonely and you don't want to just

352
00:18:45,560 --> 00:18:47,520
Speaker 1: I'm not saying you don't. You don't date. You don't

353
00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:49,800
Speaker 1: have to be in a relationship. Dating and being in

354
00:18:49,840 --> 00:18:52,520
Speaker 1: a relationship is something totally different. But I feel like

355
00:18:52,560 --> 00:18:56,240
Speaker 1: you attach yourself very quickly to a person too. Now

356
00:18:56,280 --> 00:18:59,679
Speaker 1: that's your girlfriend. No, you don't have to jump in

357
00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:02,000
Speaker 1: a re ationship with everybody you date. That's why it's

358
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:05,399
Speaker 1: called dating until you realize that you don't want to

359
00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:09,000
Speaker 1: be without this person. But you can't feel like that

360
00:19:09,080 --> 00:19:12,359
Speaker 1: until you know a person in and out. You got me,

361
00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:16,119
Speaker 1: So I think you should focus on yourself and date.

362
00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:19,639
Speaker 1: Go to new places. If you keep meeting people the

363
00:19:19,720 --> 00:19:22,639
Speaker 1: same places, don't go to them places to meet people.

364
00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:27,119
Speaker 1: You're attracting people. That's getting shot. Uh, that's hiding kids.

365
00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:30,160
Speaker 1: You know, all that type of ship whatever, everybody's gonna

366
00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:32,960
Speaker 1: have something with them. You got shipped with you. But

367
00:19:33,080 --> 00:19:35,600
Speaker 1: that's why you need to work on that. Nobody is

368
00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:38,199
Speaker 1: ever gonna be fully healed, Nobody is ever gonna be

369
00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:42,160
Speaker 1: perfect or you know held. You know why, because life

370
00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:44,159
Speaker 1: goes on every day is new ship that happens. You

371
00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:46,960
Speaker 1: run into new trauma, new obstacles, you know what I'm saying,

372
00:19:46,960 --> 00:19:50,280
Speaker 1: New fights, all that type of ship. You run into

373
00:19:50,320 --> 00:19:53,560
Speaker 1: that type of stuff. So we're constantly healing and evolving

374
00:19:53,600 --> 00:19:57,200
Speaker 1: all the time. New traumas are gonna happen. And where

375
00:19:57,240 --> 00:20:00,400
Speaker 1: you're going in the lane you're in this industry, Oh yeah,

376
00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:02,840
Speaker 1: you're gonna run into some obstacles. So you're gonna be

377
00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:06,400
Speaker 1: forever healing. You're gonna forever be a work in progress.

378
00:20:06,440 --> 00:20:08,560
Speaker 1: But you've got a lot of fighting you. You're very passionate.

379
00:20:08,600 --> 00:20:10,919
Speaker 1: I can tell when you love, you love hard. So

380
00:20:11,040 --> 00:20:14,000
Speaker 1: don't waste that. Save it for the right person. But

381
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:16,280
Speaker 1: get yourself right, man, and check back in with me.

382
00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:18,919
Speaker 1: I love you too. She didn't took up the whole

383
00:20:19,160 --> 00:20:22,840
Speaker 1: goddamn episode. I'm gonna be her ass, But I really

384
00:20:22,880 --> 00:20:26,760
Speaker 1: really do appreciate that story because these are the stories

385
00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:29,199
Speaker 1: that that a lot of people feel like they're alone,

386
00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:31,479
Speaker 1: and a lot of people have these issues where they

387
00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:33,560
Speaker 1: feel lonely. They don't want to be alone, but they

388
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:37,600
Speaker 1: have so much traumatic stress and and they have depression,

389
00:20:37,600 --> 00:20:40,080
Speaker 1: They suffer with anxiety and ship like that because they

390
00:20:40,119 --> 00:20:42,920
Speaker 1: have deeply rooted issues that they haven't even that they

391
00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:46,560
Speaker 1: haven't even accepted about themselves. Like you know, you see

392
00:20:46,640 --> 00:20:50,280
Speaker 1: this girl, she has a habit of well, had a

393
00:20:50,359 --> 00:20:55,760
Speaker 1: habit of blaming everybody else for her being single. No

394
00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:59,399
Speaker 1: no no, or blaming everybody else for why they can't

395
00:20:59,760 --> 00:21:03,600
Speaker 1: meet her requirements or her standards and and and her

396
00:21:03,600 --> 00:21:07,120
Speaker 1: practices and ship like no, no, no, no, we can't

397
00:21:07,119 --> 00:21:10,080
Speaker 1: have a list of demands. We can't have a list

398
00:21:10,160 --> 00:21:12,600
Speaker 1: of demands. And we don't even know what the funk

399
00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:16,800
Speaker 1: we want. We ain't even altogether, but we're not all together.

400
00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:20,280
Speaker 1: My brother Daisy, who opens up for me, he's a comedian.

401
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:23,479
Speaker 1: He has a joke about that how both men and

402
00:21:23,560 --> 00:21:26,879
Speaker 1: women when he when he's getting these relationships, they have

403
00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:30,800
Speaker 1: these presentations like you know, you present this girl with

404
00:21:30,800 --> 00:21:33,520
Speaker 1: a list, you present this guy with a list like fasting,

405
00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:36,200
Speaker 1: something as small as, oh, this nigger gotta have a house,

406
00:21:36,240 --> 00:21:38,359
Speaker 1: he gotta drive, he gotta have a bins, he gotta

407
00:21:38,400 --> 00:21:41,439
Speaker 1: have a job, and a job he gotta be making

408
00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:44,040
Speaker 1: more than twenty five hours an hour. He gotta be

409
00:21:44,560 --> 00:21:46,720
Speaker 1: And then you're sitting home. You ain't got no mother

410
00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:51,600
Speaker 1: fucking job. You're receiving government assistance. You got four kids

411
00:21:51,720 --> 00:21:54,240
Speaker 1: with with three baby daddies, do none of them do

412
00:21:54,320 --> 00:21:56,760
Speaker 1: nothing for your kids and ships, So you're just single mother,

413
00:21:56,880 --> 00:21:59,439
Speaker 1: sitting home, living off of the system. And ship and

414
00:21:59,520 --> 00:22:02,040
Speaker 1: you know you don't drive at all, you know, you know,

415
00:22:02,080 --> 00:22:04,240
Speaker 1: ship like that. You ain't got yourself together, you don't

416
00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:06,560
Speaker 1: even have a plan for your life. Ship like that,

417
00:22:06,720 --> 00:22:09,440
Speaker 1: and vice versa. So these lists of the man's these

418
00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:12,840
Speaker 1: people feel entitled and ship. That's why a relationship, especially

419
00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:15,320
Speaker 1: these days, there's no fucking joke, ain't no jumping in

420
00:22:15,359 --> 00:22:18,560
Speaker 1: and out. That's why I can't stand in a relationship

421
00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:21,240
Speaker 1: because I was in the same place she was, the

422
00:22:21,320 --> 00:22:23,520
Speaker 1: same way she was. You know what I'm saying, You

423
00:22:23,560 --> 00:22:26,879
Speaker 1: gotta learn who you are. I'm just now stepping into

424
00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:30,479
Speaker 1: who I am. I'm just now knowing getting to know

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00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:34,280
Speaker 1: myself in a way where it's like, oh, ship, that's

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00:22:34,280 --> 00:22:36,879
Speaker 1: why I couldn't keep this man. Oh that's why. This,

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00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:40,280
Speaker 1: that's why. Okay, that's why. That's why. That's why. And

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00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:43,240
Speaker 1: with every person you date, you learn something about yourself.

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00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:45,840
Speaker 1: You have to be open minded enough to learn about

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00:22:45,880 --> 00:22:49,040
Speaker 1: yourself because a lot of people still will date. You

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00:22:49,119 --> 00:22:52,239
Speaker 1: got old niggas, old women, old men up in their

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00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:55,640
Speaker 1: sixties and seventies, still wondering why they're single, going through

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00:22:55,720 --> 00:22:59,920
Speaker 1: life blaming everybody else accountability. Sometimes you have to turn

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00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:01,960
Speaker 1: mirror on yourself and you just have to be like

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00:23:02,080 --> 00:23:04,479
Speaker 1: yo funk. Dating for a minute is as hard as

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00:23:04,560 --> 00:23:07,520
Speaker 1: that is. Nobody wants to be by themselves. But you

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00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:10,360
Speaker 1: can date. You don't have to be in a relationship.

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00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:13,840
Speaker 1: You can literally have a person that you communicate with.

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00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:17,000
Speaker 1: If you can't find that person, ship, pray for it.

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00:23:17,040 --> 00:23:21,880
Speaker 1: If you ain't religious, motherfucker, go out and explore new

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00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:25,280
Speaker 1: places and new things. If you're hanging in the same places,

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00:23:25,280 --> 00:23:27,240
Speaker 1: you can get the same results. If you're doing the

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00:23:27,280 --> 00:23:30,080
Speaker 1: same ship, you can get the same results. Do something different.

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00:23:30,560 --> 00:23:32,840
Speaker 1: But that is the end of this episode. Thank you

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00:23:32,880 --> 00:23:34,480
Speaker 1: for tuning in, and make sure you tune into co

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00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:39,040
Speaker 1: Parenting Therapy every other Wednesday at seven pm only on YouTube.

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00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:41,959
Speaker 1: And tune into Carefully Reckless each and every Wednesday in

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00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:44,120
Speaker 1: the morning, on your way to work, on your way

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00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:46,320
Speaker 1: to the gym, on your way to drop the babies

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00:23:46,359 --> 00:23:48,280
Speaker 1: off to school, or wake up. Listen to it, go

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00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:50,040
Speaker 1: back to sleep if you've got no damn job, and

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00:23:50,080 --> 00:25:00,080
Speaker 1: then my deepest pam voice piece lad clad s M.

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00:25:03,560 --> 00:25:06,520
Speaker 1: Carefully Reckless is a production of I Heart Radio and

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00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:09,560
Speaker 1: The Black Effect. For more podcasts from I heart Radio,

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00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:13,200
Speaker 1: visit the I heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever

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00:25:13,280 --> 00:25:14,600
Speaker 1: you listen to your favorite shows.