WEBVTT - Torn Between Two Guys? Date Them Both!

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<v Speaker 1>That's holiday. Guess what I'm being for Halloween this year?

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<v Speaker 1>A frog.

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<v Speaker 2>Ribbit.

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<v Speaker 1>Didn't think I was going to say that, did you?

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<v Speaker 1>A god honest green frog. Why not, Jordan? We're not

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<v Speaker 1>asking the right questions. Well, basically, we're going to this

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<v Speaker 1>big Halloween party.

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<v Speaker 2>We could talk about it on air.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay. Sorry.

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<v Speaker 2>We're on air. He's yelling at me. How's it running?

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<v Speaker 1>Come on now.

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<v Speaker 2>Hang on now.

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<v Speaker 1>Wow. Wow. I've worn the shirt every day this week

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<v Speaker 1>and I'm realizing there's just shit all over it. There's just,

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<v Speaker 1>I've spilled everything I've ever eaten on this shirt.

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<v Speaker 2>And I'm on camera.

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<v Speaker 1>And I'm covered in shit.

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<v Speaker 2>Doesn't look like it.

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<v Speaker 1>This is Let Me Ask My Dad podcast.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm Gabby.

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<v Speaker 2>And I am dad slash David.

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<v Speaker 1>That's my dad. Yes. For real, real.

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<v Speaker 2>And... This is now, this is 1-16?

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<v Speaker 1>This is 1-16.

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<v Speaker 2>Almost Halloween.

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<v Speaker 1>I think I'm developing like an ear infection or something.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, it's almost Halloween.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, it's almost Halloween. Is it Halloween? Halloween's this week.

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<v Speaker 1>And I was just telling the crew before we started

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<v Speaker 1>rolling that for Halloween this year, I'm being a frog.

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<v Speaker 2>Nice.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm being a God honest, under God, God's creatures frog, okay?

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<v Speaker 1>Green frog, like a kid would draw with a crayon. Nice.

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<v Speaker 1>And that is because I'm going to this big Halloween

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<v Speaker 1>party called City of Gods.

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<v Speaker 2>Frog is the answer?

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<v Speaker 1>Frog is the answer. And all my friends are going,

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<v Speaker 1>and it's kind of like a very much so Brooklyn,

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<v Speaker 1>like theater-y place.

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<v Speaker 2>Cool cast.

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<v Speaker 1>So you have to get a little experimental with your costume.

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<v Speaker 1>Last year, Becca was a scuba diver. I was the

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<v Speaker 1>Grim Reaper from Sims. So you have to get a

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<v Speaker 1>little creative here. This year, we're going as a themed group,

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<v Speaker 1>and the theme is moss.

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<v Speaker 2>Moss.

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<v Speaker 1>Moss.

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<v Speaker 2>I like the theme.

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<v Speaker 1>Reminding you that I went to school for it. experimental theater.

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<v Speaker 1>So these are not, my friends are not normal people

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<v Speaker 1>in society.

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<v Speaker 2>Not if you're going to go as a Moss as

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<v Speaker 2>a group.

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<v Speaker 1>Moss is the theme of the group and everyone gets

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<v Speaker 1>to do their own theme of whatever Moss is. And

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<v Speaker 1>I heard Moss and I said, okay, I'm not really

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<v Speaker 1>emotionally attaching to that. I like Moss, but I don't

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<v Speaker 1>know how that could be a part of a costume.

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<v Speaker 1>But you know what loves Moss? A frog.

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<v Speaker 2>That's true.

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<v Speaker 1>So I'm that.

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<v Speaker 2>You know what I do?

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<v Speaker 1>And it's kind of slutty.

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<v Speaker 2>That's what kind of frog? Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>It's like not, not a slutty frog. And then I'm

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<v Speaker 1>going to the Renaissance Fair this week. Lizzie too. And

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<v Speaker 1>I'm being a court jester, also kind of slutty.

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<v Speaker 2>Nice. I don't want to hear that.

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<v Speaker 1>Shut up. Shut up. The things you've said, I think

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<v Speaker 1>I could be a slutty frog for Halloween.

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<v Speaker 2>You know what I always go for Halloween? My costume is? What?

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<v Speaker 2>David Bryan.

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<v Speaker 1>It's so annoying. He's actually so annoying when it comes

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<v Speaker 1>to Halloween.

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<v Speaker 2>But I nail it every year.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, my God.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, it's unbelievable.

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<v Speaker 1>I put a jacket on.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm like, David Bryan.

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<v Speaker 1>It's so hack. This is your hackest thing you do.

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<v Speaker 2>No, it's the laziest thing. It's not a hack.

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<v Speaker 1>We used to do huge Halloween parties growing up. Halloween

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<v Speaker 1>was like our favorite holiday. Epic parties. You would fully

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<v Speaker 1>dress up. You famously had to take Artie to the

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<v Speaker 1>hospital dressed as like a vampire or something. Yes. And

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<v Speaker 1>then one day you woke up and you lost all

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<v Speaker 1>sense of adventure. And excitement.

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<v Speaker 2>Peter Pan grew up.

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<v Speaker 1>And whimsy. You lost every last drop of whimsy. And

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<v Speaker 1>now every year he goes, I'm David Bryan. As if

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<v Speaker 1>that's a good bit, it's not.

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<v Speaker 2>It is. Sometimes I wear a headband.

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<v Speaker 1>It's just, what the hell?

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<v Speaker 2>It's a red, it's a red.

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<v Speaker 1>It's hack. What you're saying is hack. Why don't you

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<v Speaker 1>have a little whimsy and wear a fucking costume for

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<v Speaker 1>the best holiday of the year?

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<v Speaker 2>Not doing it. Why?

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<v Speaker 1>Why?

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<v Speaker 2>Because I nailed David Bryan so good, I can't turn

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<v Speaker 2>away from it.

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<v Speaker 1>I can't. It's so hack. Bryan's specific question.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, bring it in.

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<v Speaker 1>This is the Halloween episode. What has been your best

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<v Speaker 1>Halloween costume you've ever done? What do you think he's

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<v Speaker 1>going to fucking say?

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<v Speaker 2>Damn. Damn. David Bryan. But I even wore the big wig.

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<v Speaker 2>Once I got a big wig, so I did add

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<v Speaker 2>something to me.

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<v Speaker 1>It's so egotistical.

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<v Speaker 2>No, it's not. It's just easy.

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<v Speaker 1>You're like, look, it's me in 82.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm so famous.

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<v Speaker 1>Like, oh. Yawn.

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<v Speaker 2>That 82 wasn't the year anyway. It was 84. Six.

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<v Speaker 1>What happened in 82? You weren't alive? Um. Weren't you

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<v Speaker 1>born in 72?

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<v Speaker 2>62.

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<v Speaker 1>I was only 20.

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<v Speaker 2>We didn't have a record.

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<v Speaker 1>You were born in 62? Yeah. Right. You didn't have

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<v Speaker 1>a look when you were 20? That's when you were

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<v Speaker 1>still virtual?

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<v Speaker 2>I had a very bad look.

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<v Speaker 1>That was actually full brown Jufro and kind of those

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<v Speaker 1>glasses but actual glasses.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah. It was not a good look.

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<v Speaker 1>I thought it was a vibe. What's my favorite Halloween

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<v Speaker 1>costume I've ever done? I was Kim Possible for like

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<v Speaker 1>six years in a row. That was fun. Always rolled

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<v Speaker 1>my ankle because I was doing too many flips. What

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<v Speaker 1>am I? I was a goldfish once. That was pretty good.

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<v Speaker 1>I like a classic. Like I like like The nothing

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<v Speaker 1>out of the ordinary, like I want a classic Halloween costume.

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<v Speaker 1>Like I have one year me and Zach, we were

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<v Speaker 1>skeletons and then we bought all these tiny little bones

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<v Speaker 1>and then we handed out bones at the party. And

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<v Speaker 1>then by the end, everyone had a little bone in

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<v Speaker 1>their drink. Nice. Bone in the drink. So I like

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<v Speaker 1>a classic Halloween costume.

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<v Speaker 2>I was Jack Sparrow. Remember when I was when you

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<v Speaker 2>were a youth, when we had the big party around?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. That's what I'm talking about. That's exactly what I'm

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<v Speaker 1>talking about.

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<v Speaker 2>I still have that in my closet, I think.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, why don't you do that this year and have

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<v Speaker 1>a little fun?

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<v Speaker 2>Maybe. I'll be in Nashville.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay. What were we that year when we went to

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<v Speaker 1>the party in Nashville?

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<v Speaker 2>I came as David Bryan.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, I was... Nailed it.

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<v Speaker 2>And remember they had the spooky Dracula statue, which I

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<v Speaker 2>used to scare the shit out of you and Colton with.

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<v Speaker 1>We used to have a Dracula statue in the garage.

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<v Speaker 1>This big thing that would.

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<v Speaker 2>Buy all the scary things and you'd put like big

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<v Speaker 2>D batteries in it so the eyes would be red.

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<v Speaker 2>So it was big and then they would go to

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<v Speaker 2>sleep and they were so scared of this fucking thing.

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<v Speaker 2>And then I would move it up in the hallway

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<v Speaker 2>when they were sleeping and they would go, oh my God,

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<v Speaker 2>I moved. And then they would, then I waited the

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<v Speaker 2>other night, they'd put it in their bedroom.

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<v Speaker 1>I was. It was actually so fucked up. I was Carla,

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<v Speaker 1>I was Carla Bobby, which is Will Ferrell's wife's name

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<v Speaker 1>in Talladega Nights. You know, she's like, hey driver, drive these.

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<v Speaker 1>I was that. Okay. Yeah, I think I encourage you

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<v Speaker 1>to have a little fun this Halloween for once.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm going to go as David Bryan.

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<v Speaker 1>That's a challenge. Oh, my God.

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<v Speaker 2>Go as David Bryan.

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<v Speaker 1>Dear Gabby and Gabby's dad.

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<v Speaker 2>Hey.

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, now.

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<v Speaker 2>Turn it up.

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<v Speaker 1>I recently had to choose between two guys. They are

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<v Speaker 1>both attractive, educated, and both have good careers. Oh. Guy

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<v Speaker 1>number one comes from money. His family is in politics

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<v Speaker 1>and wealthy. But at first he didn't treat me very well,

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<v Speaker 1>last minute plans, slow at responding, and made the relationship

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<v Speaker 1>purely sexual. He stood me up three times, then disappeared

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<v Speaker 1>for two months and claimed that it was a psychotic

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<v Speaker 1>breakdown and that he was in a coma. I agreed

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<v Speaker 1>to see him once.

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<v Speaker 2>Seen that text before.

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<v Speaker 1>Been there, bitch. I'm so sorry I didn't text you back.

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<v Speaker 1>I was in a coma. It's like, no, you weren't, Kyle.

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<v Speaker 1>I agreed to see him once after that, and he

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<v Speaker 1>said he wanted a relationship this time around. Okay, so

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<v Speaker 1>maybe he had a come-to-Jesus moment in the coma.

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<v Speaker 2>Or she is a— well, I'm not going to start with

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<v Speaker 2>judgment first. Let me see the whole story. I'm very

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<v Speaker 2>judgy right now.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I'm feeling that from you. But while he was gone,

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<v Speaker 1>things progressed with a guy, number two, who is very

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<v Speaker 1>accomplished professionally and who adores me. He plans thoughtful dates,

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<v Speaker 1>is reliable, and although things are not always as exhilarating—

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<v Speaker 1>When I am with him, I feel content and calm,

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<v Speaker 1>so I chose guy number two. For once, I decided

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<v Speaker 1>to date for what I know instead of potential, but

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<v Speaker 1>now I wonder if I made the right choice. This

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<v Speaker 1>is beautiful. I want a family one day, and I

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<v Speaker 1>choose guy number two because he would make an excellent,

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<v Speaker 1>stable father and husband. On the other hand, guy number

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<v Speaker 1>one might have connections which could set up our future

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<v Speaker 1>kids in life. I would love to hear your thoughts. Whoa. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>what I heard about guy number one, yes, he's wealthy

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<v Speaker 1>and we love that. But his parents are in politics.

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<v Speaker 2>Remember, money's not number one, but it's way ahead of

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<v Speaker 2>what's ever in second place.

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<v Speaker 1>Exactly right. Parents in politics could be good in terms

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<v Speaker 1>of getting out of jail. That's it.

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<v Speaker 2>Speeding tickets.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. But also, have we typed their names into the

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<v Speaker 1>Epstein's list? Have we checked on that?

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<v Speaker 2>What's that?

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<v Speaker 1>Have we typed their names into the Epstein's list?

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know. He was in a coma.

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<v Speaker 1>He was in a coma. What put you in that coma?

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<v Speaker 1>These are questions we should be asking.

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<v Speaker 2>Exactly.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I would really do a deep dive on the

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<v Speaker 1>sinister issues inner workings of his politician parents because, God forbid,

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<v Speaker 1>you end up in some sort of demon.

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<v Speaker 2>Coma institute?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, demon sort of ring that only the politicians are doing.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, they're up to no good. They're like eating

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<v Speaker 1>babies or whatever.

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<v Speaker 2>And then... Can I say that? It's locale.

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<v Speaker 1>Eating babies?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Keeps you young. Keeps you young, historically. So I would, A,

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<v Speaker 1>check in on the parents. But I understand, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>the sweet, normal guy is sometimes incredibly boring.

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<v Speaker 2>She wants to settle. It sounds like the second, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>I'll just settle for this.

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<v Speaker 1>That's your vibe right now. It's like, I'm just going

0:10:41.090 --> 0:10:43.250
<v Speaker 1>to settle for this guy because he's nice and he's fine.

0:10:43.630 --> 0:10:47.220
<v Speaker 1>But then the guy wakes up from the coma. Narratively,

0:10:47.340 --> 0:10:50.309
<v Speaker 1>I'd like to see how that plays out. Because what

0:10:50.330 --> 0:10:52.210
<v Speaker 1>did he see in the coma? What are we going

0:10:52.230 --> 0:10:55.319
<v Speaker 1>to learn about the afterlife through his experience? That's an

0:10:55.380 --> 0:10:57.680
<v Speaker 1>exciting date. Go on one more date with him. This

0:10:57.700 --> 0:10:59.260
<v Speaker 1>is what you're going to do. Go on one date

0:10:59.280 --> 0:11:01.900
<v Speaker 1>with the coma guy. Tell the guy you're dating now

0:11:01.920 --> 0:11:04.540
<v Speaker 1>that he's your cousin. Go on a date with him.

0:11:05.140 --> 0:11:07.990
<v Speaker 1>See what he saw beyond the veil. Could be exciting.

0:11:08.630 --> 0:11:09.430
<v Speaker 1>Maybe he spoke to God.

0:11:10.710 --> 0:11:11.030
<v Speaker 2>Who knows?

0:11:11.490 --> 0:11:13.650
<v Speaker 1>You never know. I don't know if I believe in that,

0:11:13.730 --> 0:11:15.469
<v Speaker 1>but I might, depending on what this guy in the

0:11:15.490 --> 0:11:18.850
<v Speaker 1>coma has to say. Enjoy that and then settle for

0:11:18.870 --> 0:11:21.000
<v Speaker 1>the second guy. And then you just have to accept

0:11:21.050 --> 0:11:21.959
<v Speaker 1>you might be bored forever.

0:11:21.980 --> 0:11:24.720
<v Speaker 2>There you go. And not rich.

0:11:26.440 --> 0:11:29.199
<v Speaker 1>Well, the other guy seems like he's doing good professionally.

0:11:29.260 --> 0:11:31.420
<v Speaker 1>So it's like, how rich is the first guy?

0:11:33.160 --> 0:11:34.140
<v Speaker 2>Like private plane rich?

0:11:34.480 --> 0:11:36.990
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Then go with that.

0:11:37.000 --> 0:11:37.610
<v Speaker 2>Go with the coma.

0:11:38.260 --> 0:11:40.590
<v Speaker 1>Go with the coma. Maybe we could get him back

0:11:40.650 --> 0:11:41.350
<v Speaker 1>in another coma.

0:11:42.290 --> 0:11:44.070
<v Speaker 2>Exactly. Right after he signs that prenup.

0:11:44.230 --> 0:11:44.450
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:11:45.429 --> 0:11:45.809
<v Speaker 2>Bam.

0:11:45.929 --> 0:11:46.000
<v Speaker 1>Oh.

0:11:47.160 --> 0:11:50.380
<v Speaker 2>I leave everything to Katrina.

0:11:50.480 --> 0:11:57.469
<v Speaker 1>I leave everything to Katrina. Yeah. That's fun. That's joie

0:11:57.490 --> 0:11:57.950
<v Speaker 1>de vivre.

0:11:58.010 --> 0:11:58.470
<v Speaker 2>That's winning.

0:11:58.750 --> 0:12:01.750
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Have a little fun. But yeah, I guess if

0:12:01.790 --> 0:12:03.250
<v Speaker 1>you want to like get married and have a baby,

0:12:03.270 --> 0:12:07.870
<v Speaker 1>you have to settle. In this situation. No offense, Lizzie.

0:12:09.230 --> 0:12:10.089
<v Speaker 1>She has an amazing life.

0:12:12.340 --> 0:12:14.520
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Any more? Any more on this? I think we

0:12:14.540 --> 0:12:15.939
<v Speaker 2>put a cap on that pen. That's good.

0:12:16.500 --> 0:12:19.400
<v Speaker 1>Oh, my God. Could you imagine getting ghosted and the

0:12:19.440 --> 0:12:21.020
<v Speaker 1>guy comes back and he goes, I'm so sorry. I

0:12:21.040 --> 0:12:26.700
<v Speaker 1>was in a coma. That's my dream. That's actually my dream.

0:12:27.679 --> 0:12:30.339
<v Speaker 1>I'm so sorry. I've been in a serious. The day

0:12:30.400 --> 0:12:33.179
<v Speaker 1>you texted me, I went into a coma and I

0:12:33.300 --> 0:12:36.780
<v Speaker 1>just got out. You're the first person I texted. It's

0:12:36.800 --> 0:12:43.150
<v Speaker 1>like ACOTAR. Question number two. You raised me. It's your fault.

0:12:43.210 --> 0:12:44.470
<v Speaker 1>Whatever I say is your fault.

0:12:45.030 --> 0:12:45.850
<v Speaker 2>You're welcome. Yeah.

0:12:46.770 --> 0:12:49.730
<v Speaker 1>This weird twisted shit I say, it's your fault.

0:12:50.210 --> 0:12:51.819
<v Speaker 2>Oh, I haven't even told you half of the weird

0:12:51.860 --> 0:12:53.800
<v Speaker 2>twisted shit going on inside of here. Oh, my God.

0:12:53.820 --> 0:12:55.510
<v Speaker 2>I just showed you a little bit of it.

0:12:55.700 --> 0:13:01.929
<v Speaker 1>Oh, my God. Don't. Maybe don't procreate. Hi, Gabby and Dad. Hi.

0:13:02.050 --> 0:13:02.370
<v Speaker 2>Wow.

0:13:02.870 --> 0:13:07.660
<v Speaker 1>Catching strays today. David Bryan catching strays. My best friend

0:13:07.730 --> 0:13:11.170
<v Speaker 1>keeps canceling plans, and even when we reschedule, she cancels

0:13:11.210 --> 0:13:14.130
<v Speaker 1>that too. It's always last minute as well. She has

0:13:14.170 --> 0:13:16.170
<v Speaker 1>a lot of family problems, and I'm made to feel

0:13:16.210 --> 0:13:18.429
<v Speaker 1>guilty when I confront her about her lack of commitment

0:13:18.490 --> 0:13:20.570
<v Speaker 1>and effort. How can I talk to her about this?

0:13:20.790 --> 0:13:22.110
<v Speaker 1>Am I the problem? Oh.

0:13:23.980 --> 0:13:24.819
<v Speaker 2>Obviously, you're the problem.

0:13:27.059 --> 0:13:27.660
<v Speaker 1>Why do you think?

0:13:28.559 --> 0:13:29.560
<v Speaker 2>Just because it's fun to say.

0:13:30.120 --> 0:13:30.360
<v Speaker 1>Yes.

0:13:32.020 --> 0:13:32.800
<v Speaker 2>So it's all your fault.

0:13:33.340 --> 0:13:36.500
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Go into that. Go farther into that.

0:13:37.679 --> 0:13:40.290
<v Speaker 2>You don't want a solution? That's just... The solution is.

0:13:40.470 --> 0:13:41.970
<v Speaker 1>No, it's an audio medium, so keep talking.

0:13:41.990 --> 0:13:44.410
<v Speaker 2>Oh, that's right. This is... And there's a video still?

0:13:44.429 --> 0:13:46.290
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, yeah. I see you. He's doing sort of

0:13:46.330 --> 0:13:48.590
<v Speaker 1>a look and point at the camera right now, but

0:13:48.630 --> 0:13:50.710
<v Speaker 1>that does have to have some instrumental to it.

0:13:50.870 --> 0:13:51.650
<v Speaker 2>So keep talking.

0:13:53.130 --> 0:13:54.430
<v Speaker 1>Wow. Yeah, use your brain.

0:13:54.570 --> 0:13:56.550
<v Speaker 2>I mean, the easy part about it would be just

0:13:56.610 --> 0:13:59.550
<v Speaker 2>lose the friend. Right? Yeah.

0:13:59.830 --> 0:14:00.420
<v Speaker 1>I mean, if you.

0:14:00.429 --> 0:14:01.450
<v Speaker 2>Sounds like a terrible friend.

0:14:02.309 --> 0:14:07.760
<v Speaker 1>Well, if she's going through issues... Well, yeah. I mean,

0:14:07.800 --> 0:14:11.320
<v Speaker 1>I'd be pissed. I'd also be like, oh, your mom's

0:14:11.360 --> 0:14:13.420
<v Speaker 1>a bitch, so you can't show up to lunch. There's

0:14:13.460 --> 0:14:15.230
<v Speaker 1>not a strong through line there.

0:14:15.250 --> 0:14:15.890
<v Speaker 2>No.

0:14:16.150 --> 0:14:18.930
<v Speaker 1>But also, I cancel on plans constantly, and it's almost

0:14:18.970 --> 0:14:21.250
<v Speaker 1>impossible to track me down. So I am sort of

0:14:21.490 --> 0:14:23.130
<v Speaker 1>on the side of the— Empathetic. Yeah.

0:14:23.210 --> 0:14:23.610
<v Speaker 2>Empathy.

0:14:24.250 --> 0:14:27.410
<v Speaker 1>Where, like, sometimes it's just hard to make a plan.

0:14:27.430 --> 0:14:28.670
<v Speaker 2>I'm going to let you talk to someone then.

0:14:28.750 --> 0:14:32.240
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. I think— I say loser. I think we make

0:14:32.260 --> 0:14:36.670
<v Speaker 1>a pro-con list, very Rory Gilmore. And we decide if

0:14:36.740 --> 0:14:38.820
<v Speaker 1>we want to be friends with her, if the pros

0:14:39.380 --> 0:14:43.040
<v Speaker 1>outweigh the cons. Or you just put her at arm's length.

0:14:43.300 --> 0:14:46.400
<v Speaker 1>You reevaluate the friendship. And you go, okay, maybe this

0:14:46.460 --> 0:14:49.200
<v Speaker 1>is just a friend I see once a year. Maybe

0:14:49.320 --> 0:14:49.880
<v Speaker 1>let that be that.

0:14:49.900 --> 0:14:50.420
<v Speaker 2>Casual.

0:14:50.720 --> 0:14:53.740
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. This is a casual friendship. This isn't the person

0:14:53.780 --> 0:14:56.480
<v Speaker 1>you rely on for all things. That's what happens when

0:14:56.500 --> 0:14:59.000
<v Speaker 1>you grow up and you grow up alongside your friends

0:14:59.040 --> 0:15:01.850
<v Speaker 1>and everyone. Everyone's personalities start to get ironed out and

0:15:01.870 --> 0:15:04.030
<v Speaker 1>you go, okay, maybe this person isn't reliable, but this

0:15:04.070 --> 0:15:06.600
<v Speaker 1>person is. And this person cooks a nice dinner every

0:15:06.680 --> 0:15:08.440
<v Speaker 1>once in a while, you know, so I'll keep them

0:15:08.460 --> 0:15:11.120
<v Speaker 1>in the mix. And this person is good for advice

0:15:11.160 --> 0:15:14.460
<v Speaker 1>and this one's not. You know, like you sort of

0:15:14.500 --> 0:15:19.240
<v Speaker 1>start putting your friends into different buckets and they live

0:15:19.280 --> 0:15:21.900
<v Speaker 1>in those buckets. If I'm using corporate language, I just

0:15:21.950 --> 0:15:25.710
<v Speaker 1>learned the word buckets. So, yeah, I think we just

0:15:25.810 --> 0:15:30.620
<v Speaker 1>reevaluate this friendship and we reestablish her in your web

0:15:30.660 --> 0:15:31.020
<v Speaker 1>of life.

0:15:32.340 --> 0:15:32.860
<v Speaker 2>I'm going with that.

0:15:33.000 --> 0:15:34.060
<v Speaker 1>I think that was awesome advice.

0:15:34.080 --> 0:15:35.880
<v Speaker 2>I think it was awesome. And listen to Gabby.

0:15:36.500 --> 0:15:38.660
<v Speaker 1>And I'll tell you what, I've drank so much caffeine

0:15:38.680 --> 0:15:41.080
<v Speaker 1>that I'm sort of losing control of the lower half

0:15:41.100 --> 0:15:45.990
<v Speaker 1>of my face. And I'm like, my chin is cramping

0:15:46.070 --> 0:15:48.010
<v Speaker 1>for some reason. So I just want to speak power

0:15:48.050 --> 0:15:48.350
<v Speaker 1>to that.

0:15:48.710 --> 0:15:48.930
<v Speaker 2>Nice.

0:15:49.510 --> 0:15:52.270
<v Speaker 1>Question number three. I am a psych.

0:15:53.890 --> 0:15:54.150
<v Speaker 2>What?

0:15:54.690 --> 0:15:57.410
<v Speaker 1>I'm a psych in sports and was hired by a club.

0:15:57.830 --> 0:15:58.790
<v Speaker 1>What language is that?

0:15:59.820 --> 0:16:02.020
<v Speaker 2>I'm a what? A psych.

0:16:02.440 --> 0:16:06.600
<v Speaker 1>Like a psychic? No. In sports? A psychic in sports?

0:16:07.760 --> 0:16:09.760
<v Speaker 1>A psychologist in sports. Win!

0:16:11.760 --> 0:16:14.060
<v Speaker 2>Fucking win! &lt;HAL&gt; &lt;HAL&gt; &lt;HAL&gt; &lt;HAL&gt; &lt;HAL&gt; &lt;HAL&gt; &lt;HAL&gt; &lt;HAL&gt; &lt;HAL&gt; &lt;HAL&gt; &lt;HAL&gt;

0:16:14.080 --> 0:16:14.660
<v Speaker 2>Don't lose, don't.

0:16:14.590 --> 0:16:16.730
<v Speaker 1>Lose, don't lose. Don't lose. If you lose, you're a pussy.

0:16:17.210 --> 0:16:18.530
<v Speaker 2>Don't lose, don't lose, you're a loser.

0:16:18.710 --> 0:16:20.270
<v Speaker 1>You're a loser, you're a loser if you lose. It's

0:16:20.610 --> 0:16:22.390
<v Speaker 1>like the worst psychologist ever.

0:16:22.770 --> 0:16:23.710
<v Speaker 2>Win, you fucking loser.

0:16:27.370 --> 0:16:27.910
<v Speaker 1>I'm a psych in sports.

0:16:27.930 --> 0:16:29.830
<v Speaker 2>I could be a sports psychologist. Yeah, me too. When

0:16:29.850 --> 0:16:30.490
<v Speaker 2>you fucking loser.

0:16:30.510 --> 0:16:31.270
<v Speaker 1>When you fucking pussy.

0:16:31.450 --> 0:16:33.070
<v Speaker 2>Weak piece of shit loser.

0:16:33.570 --> 0:16:36.290
<v Speaker 1>I'm a psych in sports and was hired by a club.

0:16:36.430 --> 0:16:39.840
<v Speaker 1>It's like speak American for us sometimes. Like what the

0:16:39.890 --> 0:16:43.640
<v Speaker 1>fuck are you talking about? A club? Like a book club?

0:16:43.660 --> 0:16:45.060
<v Speaker 2>A sports club.

0:16:45.080 --> 0:16:47.720
<v Speaker 1>A sports club? Oh, like football.

0:16:47.760 --> 0:16:48.380
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, football.

0:16:48.500 --> 0:16:53.140
<v Speaker 1>Footay. Like footay. I fell for the coach, but she's

0:16:53.180 --> 0:16:58.290
<v Speaker 1>not gay. Where are we? Whoa. What should I do? Oh,

0:16:58.350 --> 0:17:03.229
<v Speaker 1>girl 30s blonde. It's a lesbian. Okay. A psychic sports.

0:17:03.250 --> 0:17:04.609
<v Speaker 1>I understand now.

0:17:04.790 --> 0:17:07.210
<v Speaker 2>A sports psychic lesbian.

0:17:07.970 --> 0:17:12.740
<v Speaker 1>I'm assuming British lesbian who's a psych in sports.

0:17:13.100 --> 0:17:14.520
<v Speaker 2>But it has to be a girl's team or just

0:17:14.560 --> 0:17:15.160
<v Speaker 2>a girl coach?

0:17:15.300 --> 0:17:17.220
<v Speaker 1>I think girls are allowed to work for the boys team.

0:17:17.260 --> 0:17:18.180
<v Speaker 2>I hate to break it to you.

0:17:18.520 --> 0:17:20.379
<v Speaker 1>I know. Even lesbians. Ew.

0:17:21.140 --> 0:17:22.700
<v Speaker 2>I don't like that.

0:17:23.400 --> 0:17:26.470
<v Speaker 1>I fell for the coach. Obviously another girl. Okay, now

0:17:26.609 --> 0:17:27.969
<v Speaker 1>I don't know if they would let a girl be

0:17:28.310 --> 0:17:29.930
<v Speaker 1>the coach. So now this feels like.

0:17:29.830 --> 0:17:31.970
<v Speaker 2>A women's club. You don't see girls being coaches.

0:17:32.070 --> 0:17:32.910
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, which is not right.

0:17:32.930 --> 0:17:37.110
<v Speaker 2>Now they're on the sidelines talking.

0:17:41.080 --> 0:17:44.640
<v Speaker 1>We're from New Jersey and these are jokes, okay? These

0:17:44.680 --> 0:17:47.360
<v Speaker 1>are all jokes. Women can do anything, even lesbians.

0:17:49.000 --> 0:17:49.399
<v Speaker 2>Power to you.

0:17:50.260 --> 0:17:54.620
<v Speaker 1>She fell in love with the coach of the sports team.

0:17:55.180 --> 0:17:58.600
<v Speaker 1>But she's not gay. What should she do? I mean,

0:17:58.740 --> 0:18:02.530
<v Speaker 1>I wouldn't fall in love with your boss. That's a, lesbians,

0:18:02.550 --> 0:18:06.330
<v Speaker 1>y'all so messy. They are so messy, dad.

0:18:06.490 --> 0:18:08.630
<v Speaker 2>What did I tell you? Shrinks are the most fucked

0:18:08.670 --> 0:18:11.709
<v Speaker 2>up people. Yeah. See, she's going to give advice on

0:18:11.730 --> 0:18:13.729
<v Speaker 2>how to win and not be a fucking loser when

0:18:13.770 --> 0:18:14.350
<v Speaker 2>she's a loser.

0:18:14.859 --> 0:18:15.520
<v Speaker 1>Well, she's not a loser.

0:18:15.540 --> 0:18:18.020
<v Speaker 2>Not a loser, but she has choices that she doesn't understand.

0:18:18.040 --> 0:18:19.840
<v Speaker 1>That are loser-ish.

0:18:19.980 --> 0:18:21.640
<v Speaker 2>In the direction of loser-ish.

0:18:21.760 --> 0:18:24.659
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Don't fall. I get it. Like, the coach is

0:18:24.720 --> 0:18:27.550
<v Speaker 1>sort of in the position of power. It's classic lesbian.

0:18:29.130 --> 0:18:32.550
<v Speaker 1>You know? Like, you want the boss. You want the boss.

0:18:32.690 --> 0:18:36.409
<v Speaker 1>It's a trope throughout time. But it's not a great idea.

0:18:36.560 --> 0:18:39.560
<v Speaker 1>And as a psychologist, let's turn inward.

0:18:39.580 --> 0:18:40.760
<v Speaker 2>Okay?

0:18:40.780 --> 0:18:41.080
<v Speaker 1>Okay.

0:18:41.530 --> 0:18:42.129
<v Speaker 2>Go to the mirror.

0:18:42.290 --> 0:18:45.860
<v Speaker 1>Go to the mirror. Knock, knock, knock. Who's home? This

0:18:45.930 --> 0:18:47.680
<v Speaker 1>is probably not a good idea.

0:18:47.800 --> 0:18:48.320
<v Speaker 2>Shrinky dink.

0:18:48.359 --> 0:18:51.780
<v Speaker 1>Shrinky dink. Let's not play into the lesbian stereotype of

0:18:51.820 --> 0:18:54.379
<v Speaker 1>falling in love with everyone all the time. Okay? We

0:18:54.420 --> 0:18:58.700
<v Speaker 1>have to rein that back. I'm allowed to say this.

0:18:58.920 --> 0:19:02.930
<v Speaker 1>I am the lesbian spokesperson of America. I was lesbian once.

0:19:03.930 --> 0:19:04.710
<v Speaker 2>Years ago. This is the UK.

0:19:05.550 --> 0:19:10.790
<v Speaker 1>This is... Oh, sorry. I'm the lesbian spokesperson of... America

0:19:10.890 --> 0:19:13.649
<v Speaker 1>as well as Europe, as well as the UK, as

0:19:13.670 --> 0:19:16.530
<v Speaker 1>well as Northern Ireland, whatever they're deciding to be right now. Yes.

0:19:16.710 --> 0:19:17.280
<v Speaker 2>They're in the EU.

0:19:17.609 --> 0:19:18.450
<v Speaker 1>They are? Yes.

0:19:18.710 --> 0:19:19.030
<v Speaker 2>Okay.

0:19:20.230 --> 0:19:23.210
<v Speaker 1>I think this is a really bad idea, and I

0:19:23.260 --> 0:19:26.920
<v Speaker 1>think you should prescribe yourself some Xanax. Right?

0:19:27.300 --> 0:19:28.000
<v Speaker 2>That always helps.

0:19:28.100 --> 0:19:32.419
<v Speaker 1>If I was a psych, that prescription pad, just nubs.

0:19:32.500 --> 0:19:34.540
<v Speaker 2>Gift starts giving at home. You know what I mean? Hello.

0:19:34.560 --> 0:19:35.680
<v Speaker 2>Start it at home. Yeah.

0:19:36.000 --> 0:19:38.440
<v Speaker 1>Generosity starts at home. Little Xanax.

0:19:39.580 --> 0:19:39.840
<v Speaker 2>Win.

0:19:39.859 --> 0:19:40.790
<v Speaker 1>Win. Yeah.

0:19:41.170 --> 0:19:44.240
<v Speaker 2>Then you just go win. Win. A little slower.

0:19:44.359 --> 0:19:45.719
<v Speaker 1>Win or lose, whatever.

0:19:45.800 --> 0:19:47.409
<v Speaker 2>Whatever. Don't be a loser, maybe.

0:19:47.910 --> 0:19:48.790
<v Speaker 1>Fucking whatever.

0:19:49.050 --> 0:19:49.470
<v Speaker 2>Whatever.

0:19:49.530 --> 0:19:49.970
<v Speaker 1>Whatever. Whatever.

0:19:50.070 --> 0:19:51.050
<v Speaker 2>Be a fucking loser.

0:19:51.530 --> 0:19:56.290
<v Speaker 1>Don't be a fucking loser. Fucking win. Sorry, that's disrespectful,

0:19:56.350 --> 0:20:00.630
<v Speaker 1>but we don't care. Yeah, I think this is, you

0:20:00.650 --> 0:20:04.340
<v Speaker 1>know better than this. Think about what you learned in school, escuela,

0:20:04.380 --> 0:20:07.940
<v Speaker 1>Spanish for school. Think about that. It's not a good idea.

0:20:08.430 --> 0:20:10.439
<v Speaker 1>You're blonde. I get it. We're a little out of control.

0:20:11.400 --> 0:20:14.180
<v Speaker 1>But let's rein ourselves in here. You're in your 30s, girl.

0:20:16.000 --> 0:20:16.860
<v Speaker 2>Think about your profession.

0:20:17.260 --> 0:20:23.139
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Profession comes first. There's lesbians everywhere. Look around. Find

0:20:23.180 --> 0:20:23.600
<v Speaker 1>another one.

0:20:23.609 --> 0:20:25.430
<v Speaker 2>How easy is it to be a fucking sports shrink?

0:20:25.450 --> 0:20:30.170
<v Speaker 1>I thought you were going to say lesbian. No. I'm like,

0:20:30.290 --> 0:20:30.909
<v Speaker 1>in what way?

0:20:32.410 --> 0:20:32.730
<v Speaker 2>For me.

0:20:34.170 --> 0:20:36.030
<v Speaker 1>How easy is it to be a sports shrink? Yeah,

0:20:36.090 --> 0:20:37.070
<v Speaker 1>because they're all a little dumb.

0:20:37.510 --> 0:20:39.149
<v Speaker 2>No, you just go win.

0:20:40.540 --> 0:20:43.080
<v Speaker 1>I was thinking like- Dig deep inside and win. They

0:20:43.180 --> 0:20:43.560
<v Speaker 1>all have CTE.

0:20:43.580 --> 0:20:44.800
<v Speaker 2>Dig deep inside and win.

0:20:44.820 --> 0:20:45.320
<v Speaker 1>Dig deep.

0:20:45.859 --> 0:20:46.399
<v Speaker 2>And win.

0:20:47.080 --> 0:20:49.200
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's a little, it's pretty black and white there.

0:20:49.220 --> 0:20:49.980
<v Speaker 2>They're pretty black and white.

0:20:50.020 --> 0:20:52.189
<v Speaker 1>But they have CTE. They're a little, you know, like- Well.

0:20:52.200 --> 0:20:56.130
<v Speaker 2>Then you got to just talk a little slower. Yeah. Win.

0:20:56.170 --> 0:20:58.530
<v Speaker 1>And they're girls too. They don't have CTE. They're not

0:20:58.590 --> 0:21:01.090
<v Speaker 1>like football players that are killing their wives and stuff.

0:21:01.150 --> 0:21:04.920
<v Speaker 1>It's like, it's probably- Just shopping addictions.

0:21:05.080 --> 0:21:07.340
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, or like guilt. I'm on guilt. I'm on guilt.

0:21:07.380 --> 0:21:08.160
<v Speaker 1>Guilt, guilt, guilt.

0:21:08.180 --> 0:21:08.380
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:21:09.140 --> 0:21:11.480
<v Speaker 1>Wow. That's a fun job, sports for girls.

0:21:13.369 --> 0:21:13.850
<v Speaker 2>Sounds easy.

0:21:15.230 --> 0:21:15.590
<v Speaker 1>That's it.

0:21:15.750 --> 0:21:17.990
<v Speaker 2>Is it good pay? What? Is it good pay?

0:21:18.030 --> 0:21:19.969
<v Speaker 1>I can't imagine. Why?

0:21:20.010 --> 0:21:21.010
<v Speaker 2>You're a shrink. It's professional.

0:21:21.250 --> 0:21:23.450
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but girls' sports don't really get funded.

0:21:23.650 --> 0:21:24.250
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's true.

0:21:24.490 --> 0:21:27.450
<v Speaker 1>Right. And don't say anything else. That's so much for this.

0:21:27.470 --> 0:21:31.689
<v Speaker 1>That's the end of this episode. Don't forget to rate, review,

0:21:31.830 --> 0:21:36.070
<v Speaker 1>and subscribe. Follow us on Instagram as well as TikTok.

0:21:36.090 --> 0:21:39.010
<v Speaker 1>Spun Girl Sports. We need them for some reason. We

0:21:39.050 --> 0:21:41.170
<v Speaker 1>love you so much. Bye. Daddy is my girl. Daddy

0:21:41.190 --> 0:21:43.210
<v Speaker 1>is my dad.

0:21:53.840 --> 0:21:57.380
<v Speaker 2>We play together, we sing together.

0:21:57.630 --> 0:22:01.270
<v Speaker 1>Together we wrote this song.