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Speaker 1: Motherfucking mini yourself. Many episode, motherfucking mini yourself.

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Speaker 2: Oh my life. I had to fight. I had to

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Speaker 2: fight my daddy, I had to fight my brothers. I

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Speaker 2: had to fight my cousins and my uncles. But I

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Speaker 2: never thought I'd have to fight in my own house.

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Speaker 2: I loves Harpoe, I truly do. But I kill him

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Speaker 2: dead for I let him beat me again. There it is, there,

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Speaker 2: it is.

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Speaker 3: Little mamas and gentiles alike, Welcome to another phenomenal mini

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Speaker 3: episode of My Mama Told.

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Speaker 4: Me, the podcast where we dive deep into the pockets

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Speaker 4: of black conspiracy theories.

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Speaker 3: And we finally worked to prove the theories that you

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Speaker 3: the listener have at home. It's a motherfucking mini episode.

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Speaker 4: Let's go. I think we should open it up and

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Speaker 4: not two songs anymore in the beginning. This is Yeah.

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Speaker 4: I think we.

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Speaker 3: Really can challenge ourselves to find some new, exciting, dangerous territory.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I got some moves. I just rewatched Baby Boy.

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Speaker 4: I'm ready to go. Okay, somebody had a b T night.

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Speaker 4: I like that. It's always playing. It is a good

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Speaker 4: ass movie. I read.

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Speaker 3: I saw somebody commented this the other day because it

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Speaker 3: was like a Twitter take of somebody.

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Speaker 4: Being like, baby Boy ain't nothing but this movie and this.

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Speaker 3: Movie, and the the way that people sort of treat

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Speaker 3: baby Boy as if it's like a run of the mall,

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Speaker 3: Likehood Movie is one hundred percent incorrect. It is a

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Speaker 3: great film that just so happened to be starring a

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Speaker 3: genuine psychopath. But it is a phenomenal film.

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Speaker 4: It feels like that's why people play it out like

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Speaker 4: they really try to. Yeah, like people really try to

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Speaker 4: downgrade it is not a good film, and it's like

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Speaker 4: wonderfully acted, it's beautifully shot, Like it's a great movie.

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Speaker 4: I don't understand why people have so much hate for it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's got a cool message that isn't like overly sappy,

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Speaker 3: but also does like leave levels of hope inside of it,

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Speaker 3: you know what I mean. Like it it isn't it

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Speaker 3: isn't about creating false solutions, but it is sort of

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Speaker 3: about creating a sense that, like everything in the Hood

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Speaker 3: doesn't have to be just dire and deadly, you know

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Speaker 3: what I mean. Like, there's it, truly is it? People

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Speaker 3: give Jody no space like he wasn't nineteen? Was he

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Speaker 3: supposed to be nineteen?

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Speaker 4: In that movie. That's what I read when I was

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Speaker 4: looking at people talking about it online.

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Speaker 3: WHOA, that's crazy, And this is once again it's just

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Speaker 3: I got this from threads, which I only go on

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Speaker 3: threads when I'm like not feeling good or whatever.

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Speaker 4: Threats. People were saying. Jody was supposed to be nineteen

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Speaker 4: an event was supposed to be like twenty three, twenty four. Whoa,

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Speaker 4: which to me is like damn and his brother just died.

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Speaker 3: That makes sense that she would be older.

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Speaker 4: I could.

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Speaker 3: I could see that, and that he would be younger.

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Speaker 4: He looked forty, so that's hard to make with him

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Speaker 4: being nineteen. He is a dark skinned man. Tyresee always

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Speaker 4: looked like that. That's true. He's seen Tyresee at nineteen.

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Speaker 4: He looks like ty resaid whatever he is right now.

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Speaker 4: He was in the my Way video. He was in

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Speaker 4: those Coca Cola nemesis.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, in the my Way video, and he did look

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Speaker 3: a lot older than Usher. But but I could have

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Speaker 3: bought him being nineteen in that video. I did not

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Speaker 3: buy him being nineteen and baby boy, but that's okay.

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Speaker 3: The performance outshined his age. Yeah, everybody, everybody acted their

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Speaker 3: ass off. Everybody really went crazy in them. Snoop was

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Speaker 3: really good.

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Speaker 4: Snoop was great, Ving Raims Omar Gooding, That's that's the

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Speaker 4: best thing.

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Speaker 3: He ever did a guy. I'm gonna be honest with you.

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Speaker 3: It changed my whole perspective of what Omar Gooding could do.

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Speaker 4: Mm hmm.

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Speaker 3: I was like, oh, Omar Goodness, Uh, he's a talent.

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Speaker 4: Before that, I just thought he was the dumb guy

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Speaker 4: and smart guy.

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Speaker 3: He was a great and smart guy. But but I

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Speaker 3: didn't see a lot of upward mobility from that performance.

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Speaker 4: But then nobody. You didn't feel like anybody was gonna

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Speaker 4: get out from Smart Guy, even though it was a

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Speaker 4: star studed cast. Jason Weaver went crazy in essence at Kins,

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Speaker 4: everybody was the dad. I don't know that guy's name.

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Speaker 3: No, I agree, it didn't feel like they were about

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Speaker 3: to make it out of there, but it did feel

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Speaker 3: like everybody shrined in in their role. Guy was a

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Speaker 3: solid It was a solid lineup to start to finish.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: I really like that show. Kyla Pratt was in there everybody,

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Speaker 4: that's true. Yeah, Beyonce was in there looking as old

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Speaker 4: as she does now, which was weird. Anyway, I love

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Speaker 4: Smart Guy. Yeah, we don't talk about a.

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Speaker 3: Smart guy because drum world, please, we got voicemails. We

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Speaker 3: we have been we've been telling people that that we

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Speaker 3: want you guys to call us, call us now we say,

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Speaker 3: and and you did. You called us and some of

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Speaker 3: their calls were insane and some of your calls were

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Speaker 3: very sweet. But we want to listen to voicemail together

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Speaker 3: today and maybe unpack a conspiracy that one of you,

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Speaker 3: the little Mama, was left on our on our phone.

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Speaker 4: So that's the plan. Yeah, I'm very excited about this

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Speaker 4: term for us.

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Speaker 3: It's it's really cool. I I it's groundbreaking ship that

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Speaker 3: we're doing right now.

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Speaker 4: Something at least a nasty one. One day, they are

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Speaker 4: gonna leave a nasty one.

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Speaker 3: I wish you wouldn't encourage them as much as you

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Speaker 3: you seem to be doing. But yeah, that's that's inevitable.

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Speaker 3: I agree, it's so bad. You're really bugging you keep

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Speaker 3: telling them you got it chill. But that's here we go.

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Speaker 3: We got a voicemail. I don't even know who's from

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Speaker 3: this person. Maybe they said their name. They said us

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Speaker 3: a lot of voicemails, so maybe they said their name

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Speaker 3: in a different voicemail. But fucking I'm not going back anyway.

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Speaker 3: We'll play it now, all.

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Speaker 5: Right, last time calling in because I know I called

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Speaker 5: y'all so much. But my conspiracy theory is that plastic

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Speaker 5: surgeons try to give people the Beyonce face, like subconsciously.

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Speaker 5: I see people who get plastic surgery and right before

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Speaker 5: they go too far, they literally have Beyonce's like cheekbone

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Speaker 5: or the structure. Like maybe it's because I like Beyonce,

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Speaker 5: but there's some things to this, starting with Kim Kardashian

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Speaker 5: in her plastic surgery, which subsequently leads to all her

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Speaker 5: sister's plastic surgeries. It's all like just Beyonce's face and

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Speaker 5: just being like, Okay, I kind of want this, all.

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Speaker 3: Right, It's it's Beyonce's face. Is the question at hand?

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Speaker 3: Is this somehow secretly plastic surgeons saying they want they

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Speaker 3: want to make people look like Beyonce subconsciously?

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Speaker 4: She says, I don't think it is that subconscious, is

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Speaker 4: what I will say to this one. I think that

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Speaker 4: there is always a beauty standard at the time that

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Speaker 4: directly aligns with the celebrity, and you see fallout from

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Speaker 4: that that people want to look like that person. I

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Speaker 4: think that if you went back to whatever decade you

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Speaker 4: would say she was the most on top, you would

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Speaker 4: see people trying to look like Diana Ross. I don't

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Speaker 4: think it's new. I think that the means to make

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Speaker 4: yourself look like that person right have gone have gotten

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Speaker 4: more advanced, and that's why we see so many people.

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Speaker 4: I mean, Nick, you live in LA. How many Kim

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Speaker 4: Kardashians do you know in La? Like that? Shit's crazy?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, no, I agree, I one hundred percent agree with you.

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Speaker 3: I think this is just the baddest bitch on the

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Speaker 3: planet by far. And so it's like, all right, well, yeah,

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Speaker 3: everybody's going to use her as the standard of beauty,

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Speaker 3: including other very wealthy women who want to mirror that.

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Speaker 3: And I think a fair amount of what the Kardashians

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Speaker 3: are doing is blackfishing and sort of like wanting to

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Speaker 3: create this image that they are more quote unquote ethnic

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Speaker 3: than they probably appear just off of their own fucking

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Speaker 3: original genetic makeup. And so I think, yeah, they go like, well,

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Speaker 3: who's a black woman who looks like a black woman.

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Speaker 3: I think Beyonce very much looks like a black woman,

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Speaker 3: but with euro centric enough features that it does not

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Speaker 3: offend white eyes. You know what I mean, Like it

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Speaker 3: is not right. I understand what you're saying completely, Yeah,

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Speaker 3: it's not. I think there are black women who we

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Speaker 3: go are very beautiful, but are also more of a

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Speaker 3: polarizing conversation for white people, you know what I mean,

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Speaker 3: Like Takarl Williams comes to mind where I go like, god,

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Speaker 3: damn it.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, or it's just like no, it's just nuts.

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Speaker 3: But like white people ain't necessarily gonna have or Takar Jones,

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Speaker 3: that's who it is. Ta Carl Williams is a comedian.

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Speaker 4: It's awesome.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but Ta Carl Jones is the one that I'm

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Speaker 3: thinking of. But but yeah, I think it is more

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Speaker 3: of a h a debate for white people, whereas like

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Speaker 3: Beyonce is more objective for white people as a beauty standard.

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Speaker 4: Right, and that man, I'm sorry I looked up to Carl. Still,

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Speaker 4: if you want to do the show. No. I think

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Speaker 4: the scary thing in that though, is you wonder what

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Speaker 4: happens when the trend shifts, Like I wonder that a

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Speaker 4: lot about like women who went out and got large

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Speaker 4: fake breasts in the nineties. Yeah, you know what I'm saying,

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Speaker 4: And then as the cultural pendulum kind of swung to

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Speaker 4: something different, you're left in this thing that was really

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Speaker 4: served you well at one point, but then now you

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Speaker 4: look kind of dated and it seems like, well to me,

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Speaker 4: that's sort of the worry.

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Speaker 3: It's funny you should bring that up, because I was

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Speaker 3: literally just listening to a Daily episode about that exact issue.

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Speaker 3: They were saying that, like, we are in the middle

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Speaker 3: of a swing towards smaller breasts, that like, women are

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Speaker 3: in much larger numbers now getting breast reductions in fact,

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Speaker 3: because like big old titties number one are a massive

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Speaker 3: burden physically and come with a larger cost socially, but

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Speaker 3: they also are not in style the same way that

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Speaker 3: they used to be. And so there's like a bunch

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Speaker 3: of women getting breast reductions and it does make you think,

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Speaker 3: like how much of these plastic surgeries are going to

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Speaker 3: age over time as trends sort of shift, which is sad. Also,

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Speaker 3: do big titties ever really go out of style? That's

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Speaker 3: where I start to call bullshit, And I'll.

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Speaker 4: Be honest in the magazine, sure, or like at the

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Speaker 4: highest levels of whatever you deem to be fashion, but

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Speaker 4: like I feel like I don't know. There could still

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Speaker 4: be a lady in Chicago with huge titties and it's cool.

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Speaker 3: And listen, I'm still gonna be a big fan of

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Speaker 3: that lady, you know what.

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Speaker 4: I mean exact, I don't think sure not be courted

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Speaker 4: for that.

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Speaker 3: It's it's one of those things that I think fashion

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Speaker 3: repeatedly does where they claim that this thing is bad,

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Speaker 3: or this thing is out of style, or this is

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Speaker 3: not the way that women are or people are in

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Speaker 3: general anymore. That it's completely fabricated by a bunch of

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Speaker 3: people who are not basing this off of sexuality. They're

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Speaker 3: basing it off of like trends and their intention to

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Speaker 3: sell items.

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Speaker 4: Do you know what I mean. So it's like silhouettes, and.

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Speaker 3: So you're making a bunch of clothes that don't require

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Speaker 3: a bra anymore, or at least look worse when you

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Speaker 3: have a bra. And so you tell everybody that like

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Speaker 3: little tits are in when in fact little tits saying

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Speaker 3: anymore in other than for the people who feel like

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Speaker 3: they need that physically to take that off of their

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Speaker 3: you know what I mean, off of their person, But

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Speaker 3: like little tits aren't, They're they're not out I'm a

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Speaker 3: big fan of those two. But it isn't just like, oh,

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Speaker 3: the world decided that this has changed. It's a bunch

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Speaker 3: of people in charge of a magazine that are telling

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Speaker 3: us this right.

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Speaker 4: Right, right right right? Yeah, that is that is a

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Speaker 4: that is a very odd thing because yeah, Bay just

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Speaker 4: typed in the chat everyone wants to be heroin chic again,

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Speaker 4: and you're like the fact that that it's again begs

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Speaker 4: the question how for how long? Right? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: One?

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Speaker 4: And I think you just got to chill because big

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Speaker 4: titties will get cool again. I truly think, I truly

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Speaker 4: think everyone hits the zeitgeist in like a perfect way

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Speaker 4: at one point in their life. And if you just

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Speaker 4: go fast to who you are at some point and

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Speaker 4: you don't know when it is and you can't control that,

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Speaker 4: it might not be when you're It might for some

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Speaker 4: poor people. Who is that little boy? On on on

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Speaker 4: on Tim and Tuoman Taylor? Who is that little boy?

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Speaker 4: And Taylor Thomas he fucked up. He got that ship

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Speaker 4: from eleven to fifteen. But he hit it, Yeah, he

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Speaker 4: hit it hard.

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Speaker 3: He was but like he was, he was the state

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Speaker 3: or of beauty in our country before Beyonce.

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Speaker 4: It was like Halie McBeal and was gorgeous symbol. Baby,

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Speaker 4: he was sym symbol. He was not not the musical

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Speaker 4: Simba that was Jason Waver of The Smart Eye.

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Speaker 1: Again.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, but I do think that everyone hits that it's

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Speaker 4: hard though, because you gotta worry if you can't like

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Speaker 4: strike while the iron's hot, you know, well.

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Speaker 3: That's I think that's where it becomes this complicated thing, Right,

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Speaker 3: Is that like striking while the iron's hot, or feeling

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Speaker 3: so out of place in the body that you have

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Speaker 3: that you're not willing to wait out the changes and trends,

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Speaker 3: right that, Like, if you are made to believe by media,

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Speaker 3: by the people around you that your body is somehow incorrect,

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Speaker 3: then you start to desire something else.

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Speaker 4: Hence all these women in the eighties and nineties.

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Speaker 3: Wanting to get the big fake t tits in the

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Speaker 3: first place.

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Speaker 4: And so one of the things that.

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Speaker 3: The the thing I was listening to was saying the

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Speaker 3: podcast I was listening to was that more than ever,

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Speaker 3: gen Z is real down for plastic surgery. They're real like, nah, whatever,

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Speaker 3: we don't but they're not looking at it as a

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Speaker 3: reflection of responding to like the male gaze. They look

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Speaker 3: at it as like their own autonomy, where they go like, no,

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Speaker 3: this is my way of just activating who I want

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Speaker 3: to be, not just because some dude told me this

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Speaker 3: is what we like.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, that's tough. That's tough. It's hard for me to

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Speaker 4: get behind elective surgery in a major way. Mmmm, just

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Speaker 4: like because because you like how the world is, how

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Speaker 4: much resources it takes, you know what I'm saying. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: and no matter where you go, there you're at. But like,

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Speaker 4: I'm glad that they find freedom in that. And I

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Speaker 4: might have a very antiquated view of it, but it

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Speaker 4: does to me feel like if you need surgery to

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Speaker 4: be yourself, I don't know if that's a hole that

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Speaker 4: gets filled always sometimes you know, Yeah, I worry, I

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Speaker 4: worry less, and that's not a great solution to a problem.

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Speaker 3: I feel like I worry less about even it being

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Speaker 3: the solution to the problem because maybe it is for you,

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Speaker 3: and and I don't want to presume I don't want

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Speaker 3: to make that choice for you, but I do worry that,

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Speaker 3: like there might have been another solution if you explored

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Speaker 3: in a different way, right, And so I think I

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Speaker 3: think I for plastic surgery in particular. I go, if

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Speaker 3: that's what you want, baby girl or a baby boy, whatever,

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Speaker 3: that's what you should go do.

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Speaker 4: And there's no shame in that.

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Speaker 3: On the flip side, I bet you there was another

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Speaker 3: way into that same feeling if you were able to

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Speaker 3: get past some of the esthetic blockage that's sitting in

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Speaker 3: front of you.

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Speaker 4: Right. So, yeah, I don't We're so smart. Yeah we

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Speaker 4: sound great. This is this isn't gonna come off problematic

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Speaker 4: at all. Let's just talk. This is what women should

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Speaker 4: do into their bodies surgically.

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Speaker 3: Buddy, I know for sure this won't age poorly at all.

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Speaker 3: We are gonna this conversation is going to stand the

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Speaker 3: test of time.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, my mama told me.

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Speaker 3: Presents the Start to Steal Tour. We're very excited about it. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I'm not about to bite my tongue. We want to

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Speaker 3: sell it out and the dates are coming up fast,

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00:17:43,760 --> 00:17:45,520
Speaker 3: and so if you live in one of these areas,

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Speaker 3: we want you to buy your tickets now. It's all

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00:17:47,840 --> 00:17:52,800
Speaker 3: available on our instagrams, on our websites, on our link tree.

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Speaker 1: No.

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Speaker 3: Remember seventeenth, We're in San Francisco, December fifth. We're in Denver,

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Speaker 3: December twelfth, were in c and December fifteenth, you're closing

312
00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:06,160
Speaker 3: it out in Portland, Oregon. We want y'all to come out.

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Speaker 3: We want y'all to kick it. We will be doing

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Speaker 3: our coveted live show with special guests with just me

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Speaker 3: and David. Depending on the city, it'll be a great

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00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:18,679
Speaker 3: time all that meet and greets. You think Chris Brown

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Speaker 3: has a good meet and greet.

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Speaker 4: Bro let's been clear.

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Speaker 3: I'll take a weird picture with you for free.

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Speaker 4: These conversations are necessary though, because I do feel like

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Speaker 4: sometimes these things, the technology and whatnot, outpaces people having

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Speaker 4: true feelings about it, and then you get to this

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Speaker 4: point where you don't know where the culture's at, you know,

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Speaker 4: you know what I mean. So it's like it does

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Speaker 4: feel and I think that's why people get so caught

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Speaker 4: up one way or another within the culture wars, right

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Speaker 4: because it's like, wait, this just happened. I don't even

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Speaker 4: get it.

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Speaker 3: I think also, we don't give enough credit to how

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Speaker 3: much these culture wars are dictated by a small swath

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Speaker 3: of people. One of the things that they talked about

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Speaker 3: in that in that podcast is that three quarters of

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Speaker 3: plastic surgeons are men, men who for a long time

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Speaker 3: were responding to women saying I want a breast reduction

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Speaker 3: by being like, well, your husband won't like that, or

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Speaker 3: like that that I actually like the way this curves

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Speaker 3: or shaping. Literally there was like a this is fucked up,

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Speaker 3: but there was like.

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Speaker 4: A would be like, no, I actually like big as

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Speaker 4: why did I come here? Cool?

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Speaker 3: Man?

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Speaker 4: I don't.

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Speaker 3: For me, I don't, but that's dope for you. That

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Speaker 3: One of the things that's craziest is that there actually

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Speaker 3: was like this peer reviewed journal article, well, basically a

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Speaker 3: doctor describes in detail the perfect shape of a breast,

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Speaker 3: like this is the ideal breast that all plastic surgeons

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Speaker 3: should be working towards, and basically like presenting this as

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Speaker 3: this is what we should be crafting, which is insane

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Speaker 3: because bodies come in so many different shapes and forms

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Speaker 3: that even the ideal quote unquote ideal breast might look

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Speaker 3: nuts on a lady that ain't built like that.

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Speaker 4: Right, and by who's yeah, it's it's regulating bodies in

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Speaker 4: that way. It's so crazy. Yeah on, And it's like,

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Speaker 4: come on, man. Some people like long titties.

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Speaker 3: Some people like that for sure, some people like short titties,

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Speaker 3: and the rest Yeah, some people like it when they

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00:20:52,720 --> 00:20:54,119
Speaker 3: hang down and they can pick it up and put

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Speaker 3: it to their ear like a telephone.

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Speaker 4: Uh. Do your titties hang low any time? In the nut?

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Speaker 4: Can you tie them in a bow? Shout out to jibs.

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Speaker 1: Uh?

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Speaker 3: But no, I think to the greater to the greater

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Speaker 3: point of whether or not plastic surgeons are making people

365
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Speaker 3: look like Beyonce, I think they're probably asking these plastic

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00:21:21,800 --> 00:21:26,120
Speaker 3: surgeons on some sub subconscious level to make them look

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Speaker 3: like Beyonce, or in a very straight up level, to

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Speaker 3: make them look like Beyonce. And I think we're all

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Speaker 3: working from the same palette In a lot of ways.

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Speaker 3: We go this is this is the standard of beauty.

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Speaker 3: Therefore I will do my best to make you look

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Speaker 3: like that, even if that's not what you're supposed to

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Speaker 3: look like.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, definitely. I feel like within this the conspiracy

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Speaker 4: is not within the plastic surgeons. It's kind of society

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Speaker 4: at large.

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00:21:52,320 --> 00:21:55,919
Speaker 3: Yeah, we all want to look like Beyonce, and we

378
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Speaker 3: should maybe reflect on whether that's a healthy approach.

379
00:22:00,560 --> 00:22:01,560
Speaker 4: Yeah exactly.

380
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Speaker 3: But that said, if you want to look like Beyonce

381
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Speaker 3: and you know how to do it, God bless you,

382
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:08,159
Speaker 3: because you just do.

383
00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:12,840
Speaker 4: I know. Yeah, and trust me, you're not gonna pop

384
00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:15,399
Speaker 4: out looking like Beyonce in your life is gonna get worse.

385
00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:22,440
Speaker 4: You're gonna see some improvements. You're definitely gonna see some results.

386
00:22:23,280 --> 00:22:26,000
Speaker 4: I think people are gonna talk a little differently to you.

387
00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:29,480
Speaker 4: They're not going to push you around down at the

388
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Speaker 4: post office anymore. Where's that check?

389
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Speaker 3: I don't know my man, My male man looks like Beyonesly.

390
00:22:43,359 --> 00:22:46,840
Speaker 4: I'm not got lost, they got lost, gaty. I gotta

391
00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:50,560
Speaker 4: buy him two Christmas presents? Now? Do you buy your

392
00:22:50,560 --> 00:22:54,040
Speaker 4: male man a Christmas present? Fuck? No, yeah, me either.

393
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Speaker 3: I hate my male lady's cuts.

394
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Speaker 4: I whoa. I can't stand this bitch, damn for real.

395
00:23:04,240 --> 00:23:08,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, she's she's rude, and she never says hello, and

396
00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:11,920
Speaker 3: and she shows up late almost every day. But sometimes

397
00:23:11,920 --> 00:23:16,600
Speaker 3: she's delivering at like eight at night. So like if

398
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Speaker 3: I needed mail, I'm just fucked.

399
00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:21,280
Speaker 4: Do you know what I mean? You gotta you gotta

400
00:23:21,520 --> 00:23:23,520
Speaker 4: because you're waiting for those sag after checks.

401
00:23:23,520 --> 00:23:25,840
Speaker 3: You know what I mean, Bro, I got cast I

402
00:23:25,880 --> 00:23:29,439
Speaker 3: got checks, the cash. She'll be showing up at like

403
00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:33,240
Speaker 3: eight at night, leaving leaving, Uh, she'll leave packages on

404
00:23:33,280 --> 00:23:35,040
Speaker 3: the porch and not ring the door, but you know

405
00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:36,960
Speaker 3: what I mean, not even indicating like, oh, you have

406
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:40,240
Speaker 3: a package, It'll just like put it out. And then

407
00:23:40,280 --> 00:23:43,240
Speaker 3: because you show up so late, now it's out overnight.

408
00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:46,520
Speaker 3: My sh it's just outside because you give a.

409
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Speaker 6: Wow.

410
00:23:50,520 --> 00:23:53,720
Speaker 4: Man, my guy's cool. You're like a gay guys. He's pretty,

411
00:23:53,720 --> 00:23:57,720
Speaker 4: he's like hip damn yeah. But then he's like so hip.

412
00:23:57,800 --> 00:23:59,480
Speaker 4: Sometimes I try to talk to him and he doesn't

413
00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:01,199
Speaker 4: want to talk to me because I have like a

414
00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:03,600
Speaker 4: little beestro table out front, so I'll be out the

415
00:24:03,680 --> 00:24:04,640
Speaker 4: side when he comes out.

416
00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:15,120
Speaker 6: Sometimes he sees you out there and he goes, hey, man,

417
00:24:15,240 --> 00:24:16,040
Speaker 6: what's up guy?

418
00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:22,800
Speaker 4: I can't talk today. I gotta And also I in

419
00:24:22,840 --> 00:24:25,720
Speaker 4: the world. My sense of humor completely leaves me, so like,

420
00:24:26,160 --> 00:24:28,240
Speaker 4: I'm not saying funny stuff like I am on here.

421
00:24:28,280 --> 00:24:37,240
Speaker 3: I'm just like, can I just say it is so

422
00:24:37,359 --> 00:24:40,080
Speaker 3: cathartic to hear you say that, because I feel the

423
00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:41,160
Speaker 3: exact same way.

424
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Speaker 4: I'm not. Really, I'm not being funny. I'm not nailing it.

425
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Speaker 3: Most of the time when I'm talking to people, I

426
00:24:47,840 --> 00:24:52,000
Speaker 3: just be having ordinary conversations and then they go, what

427
00:24:52,040 --> 00:24:53,800
Speaker 3: are you doing? I go, I'm a comedian and they

428
00:24:53,840 --> 00:24:58,360
Speaker 3: go all right, and I just feel like I'm I'm

429
00:24:58,400 --> 00:25:01,240
Speaker 3: a fraud most the I.

430
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Speaker 4: This is me at my peak because I can harness

431
00:25:04,520 --> 00:25:07,560
Speaker 4: it in to the hour or two hours that we

432
00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:10,280
Speaker 4: have to do this, and then I spent my low.

433
00:25:10,520 --> 00:25:13,840
Speaker 4: I'm not funny, man. I wish you could talk to

434
00:25:13,880 --> 00:25:16,000
Speaker 4: my girl about how unfunny I am in the house.

435
00:25:16,560 --> 00:25:22,520
Speaker 4: Damn sound brother. It's like puns and like stupid. I

436
00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:24,760
Speaker 4: make stupid jo this is this just happened to me.

437
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:27,760
Speaker 4: I make terrible jokes to her. And the other day

438
00:25:27,840 --> 00:25:32,040
Speaker 4: she was like, can you just stop shortening ship because

439
00:25:32,119 --> 00:25:34,200
Speaker 4: I know that that's a douchebag thing to set do.

440
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:36,960
Speaker 4: And in my head I was like, oh, that's so funny.

441
00:25:37,200 --> 00:25:39,639
Speaker 4: So I do it, but it's not ironic if you

442
00:25:39,680 --> 00:25:41,920
Speaker 4: do it all the time anymore. Yeah, on you once

443
00:25:41,960 --> 00:25:45,320
Speaker 4: you've done it more than twice. This is just who

444
00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:48,640
Speaker 4: you are, right. And I got an audition for this

445
00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:52,720
Speaker 4: show and they the character was a douchebag and all

446
00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:55,720
Speaker 4: he did was shorten everything he said in the audition

447
00:25:56,200 --> 00:25:58,560
Speaker 4: self described douchebag. And I was like, oh.

448
00:25:58,320 --> 00:26:00,280
Speaker 3: Man, I'm gonna do that.

449
00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:03,800
Speaker 4: No, no, no, I was like, oh man, she's roll now.

450
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:07,240
Speaker 4: It was the mirror you needed held up to you

451
00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:12,399
Speaker 4: exactly because my sense of humor is not great within

452
00:26:12,520 --> 00:26:15,640
Speaker 4: any a lot of other aspects. It's it's it's it's

453
00:26:15,680 --> 00:26:16,400
Speaker 4: not I get it.

454
00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:21,840
Speaker 3: I've I've put everything I can into comedy, Like I

455
00:26:21,880 --> 00:26:27,199
Speaker 3: sink every fucking day into comedy, so much so that

456
00:26:27,320 --> 00:26:29,600
Speaker 3: I drain myself dry.

457
00:26:30,760 --> 00:26:35,360
Speaker 4: Nothing. I got nothing. That's why it sucks so bad

458
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:38,440
Speaker 4: when my comedy doesn't do good. I'm like, fuck, I'm

459
00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:39,520
Speaker 4: gonna kill myself.

460
00:26:39,840 --> 00:26:48,719
Speaker 3: I did everything, I did everything, I disassociated from the

461
00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:50,160
Speaker 3: horrors of the world for this.

462
00:26:51,760 --> 00:26:57,879
Speaker 4: At least let it work. I ruined my whole personality

463
00:26:57,960 --> 00:26:58,159
Speaker 4: for this.

464
00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:01,520
Speaker 3: Come on, man, I could have been a champion for

465
00:27:01,840 --> 00:27:05,760
Speaker 3: justice and truth and I chose this, So it has

466
00:27:05,840 --> 00:27:10,560
Speaker 3: to work. I think about it all the time of

467
00:27:10,760 --> 00:27:13,280
Speaker 3: like how much I I sort of have to like

468
00:27:14,520 --> 00:27:17,359
Speaker 3: shut down a moral code that I know that I

469
00:27:17,400 --> 00:27:21,400
Speaker 3: believe that I live under actively for the sake of

470
00:27:21,440 --> 00:27:24,879
Speaker 3: getting a joke off or being able to reason with

471
00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:29,959
Speaker 3: a comedic idea that sometimes has like vile undertones. And

472
00:27:29,960 --> 00:27:35,600
Speaker 3: and when it doesn't work, you are you feel like garbage?

473
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:40,000
Speaker 4: You're such apset guy? Yeah, because you mix those words

474
00:27:40,080 --> 00:27:42,320
Speaker 4: up and then it's like because sometimes it's like a

475
00:27:42,920 --> 00:27:46,520
Speaker 4: you're tiptoeing, especially with the new ship. Man, I don't

476
00:27:46,520 --> 00:27:47,960
Speaker 4: want to go to your stand UPFF to this now.

477
00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:53,200
Speaker 3: I feel like I'm glad I don't spot for tonight,

478
00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:57,320
Speaker 3: but I gotta do hour it be great. Yeah, you'll

479
00:27:57,400 --> 00:28:06,000
Speaker 3: kill it. So, dear caller, our inaugural caller, I would

480
00:28:06,040 --> 00:28:10,480
Speaker 3: say the the beginner caller, we would say that, yes,

481
00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:14,800
Speaker 3: our plastic surgeons are making people look like Beyonce. No,

482
00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:18,960
Speaker 3: it is not subconscious. It is very conscious, and we're

483
00:28:19,000 --> 00:28:22,520
Speaker 3: all maybe needing to spend a little more time thinking

484
00:28:22,560 --> 00:28:24,440
Speaker 3: about why we would.

485
00:28:24,200 --> 00:28:27,760
Speaker 4: Want that as a society. Beautiful.

486
00:28:28,880 --> 00:28:31,200
Speaker 3: All right, Well, you want to tell the people where

487
00:28:31,200 --> 00:28:32,560
Speaker 3: they can find you, what cool.

488
00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:36,720
Speaker 4: Shoes you got? Jokes eighty seven on Instagram, go to

489
00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:40,320
Speaker 4: patreon dot com, backslash David bory g b o r

490
00:28:40,520 --> 00:28:44,160
Speaker 4: I E go buy my motherfucking special Birth of a Nation.

491
00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:48,960
Speaker 4: It's very funny. You're gonna love it, walk your dog

492
00:28:49,080 --> 00:28:52,920
Speaker 4: to it, make love to it. Mm hm oh. It's

493
00:28:52,920 --> 00:28:56,600
Speaker 4: also available on all streaming platforms Spotify, all that shit.

494
00:28:57,360 --> 00:29:04,000
Speaker 4: Yeah all right, that makes more sense to it.

495
00:29:08,680 --> 00:29:12,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's fucking crazy you can. You can follow me

496
00:29:12,360 --> 00:29:15,320
Speaker 3: at Langston Kerman on all social media platforms. You can

497
00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:18,560
Speaker 3: watch my special on Netflix it's called Bad Poetry. You

498
00:29:18,560 --> 00:29:21,120
Speaker 3: can watch English Teacher on Hulu and FX.

499
00:29:22,760 --> 00:29:23,640
Speaker 4: That's oh.

500
00:29:23,720 --> 00:29:25,400
Speaker 3: If you want to send us your own drops, your

501
00:29:25,440 --> 00:29:29,120
Speaker 3: own conspiracy theories. If you want to tell us, UH,

502
00:29:29,280 --> 00:29:33,040
Speaker 3: what beauty standards we should shift everything to UH for

503
00:29:33,160 --> 00:29:36,160
Speaker 3: the next wave of plastic surgery. Send it all to

504
00:29:36,240 --> 00:29:39,480
Speaker 3: my Mama pod at gmail dot com. And please like

505
00:29:39,560 --> 00:29:44,240
Speaker 3: this sweet sweet I would say, over zealous caller who

506
00:29:44,480 --> 00:29:47,920
Speaker 3: uh two things a step too far, but but we

507
00:29:47,920 --> 00:29:51,720
Speaker 3: we love her anyway. Send us your own voicemails at

508
00:29:51,800 --> 00:29:54,640
Speaker 3: eight four four Little Moms. We want to hear from

509
00:29:54,720 --> 00:29:59,040
Speaker 3: you at eight four four Little Moms. Call us now

510
00:29:59,480 --> 00:30:03,320
Speaker 3: and and maybe your voicemail will get read on the episode.

511
00:30:03,720 --> 00:30:08,960
Speaker 3: And like subscribe rate review by the merch Say bye

512
00:30:09,200 --> 00:30:12,680
Speaker 3: to your loved ones before you go. Who knows what's

513
00:30:12,720 --> 00:30:13,640
Speaker 3: gonna happen to you?

514
00:30:13,920 --> 00:30:14,440
Speaker 4: Bye, bitch.

515
00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:29,920
Speaker 1: Motherfucking mini episode Mini episode, motherfucking Mini everis motherfucking mini

516
00:30:29,960 --> 00:30:35,840
Speaker 1: episode Mini episode, motherfucking Mini Episode