WEBVTT - Lean Into the Rot with Samantha Irby 0:00:00.960 --> 0:00:04.840 Hi guys, Hi everybody, It's Thursday, Thursday. Today's Thursday. That 0:00:04.920 --> 0:00:08.240 means it is October twelfth. I'm performing at the Pantagious 0:00:08.240 --> 0:00:10.280 tonight and tomorrow night, and I am coming to the 0:00:10.280 --> 0:00:12.320 Arizona Financial Center on Saturday. 0:00:12.320 --> 0:00:14.480 This Saturday night. You guys can still get tickets for. 0:00:14.440 --> 0:00:18.120 That Arizona Financial Center in Phoenix. 0:00:18.760 --> 0:00:20.800 And then next weekend. 0:00:20.880 --> 0:00:25.680 I have Cleveland, Ohio October twentieth, Columbus, Ohio October twenty first, 0:00:25.720 --> 0:00:29.400 and then Pittsburgh October twenty second at the Hines Theater, 0:00:29.680 --> 0:00:32.560 so please get tickets for that in those areas. 0:00:33.120 --> 0:00:34.080 This week has. 0:00:34.000 --> 0:00:39.159 Been a very difficult week because of all the violence 0:00:39.320 --> 0:00:43.800 and terrorism going on in Israel and how complicated that 0:00:43.880 --> 0:00:44.680 situation is. 0:00:45.560 --> 0:00:48.000 So yeah, a lot of mixed emotions. 0:00:48.560 --> 0:00:50.599 I don't think we'll get into it here, but I 0:00:50.640 --> 0:00:53.279 think that it is important to be as educated as 0:00:53.360 --> 0:00:56.160 you can and to understand that Hamas is a terrorist 0:00:56.240 --> 0:01:01.720 organization that does not represent most Palestine, just like MAGA 0:01:01.800 --> 0:01:04.840 right wing nuts don't represent most of Americans, just like 0:01:04.959 --> 0:01:11.040 jihattists don't represent most Islamicists. And to remember that there's 0:01:11.120 --> 0:01:13.720 really no room to say this is justified. I understand 0:01:13.800 --> 0:01:16.680 how complicated the history of that region is, and that 0:01:16.920 --> 0:01:20.520 Israeli government is not innocent in the oppression of the Palestinians, 0:01:20.560 --> 0:01:24.399 and the Palestinians their governments have not been innocent as well. 0:01:24.480 --> 0:01:26.039 So it is a two way street. 0:01:26.120 --> 0:01:29.440 And it really would be wonderful if we could have 0:01:29.520 --> 0:01:31.800 peace somewhere in this world. 0:01:32.400 --> 0:01:34.400 I mean, it is such a complex situation. I wonder. 0:01:34.840 --> 0:01:37.440 It always leaves me wondering, like what can we do? 0:01:38.120 --> 0:01:40.560 And I wonder if there's some like human rights organizations 0:01:40.600 --> 0:01:41.000 we can help. 0:01:41.080 --> 0:01:43.360 Yeah, there is a human rights organization you can donate 0:01:43.400 --> 0:01:45.560 to my friend Shelley. They're helping people on the ground, 0:01:45.600 --> 0:01:48.240 and not just Israelis. They're helping any Palestinians who have 0:01:48.320 --> 0:01:51.320 been since there is a blockade in Glaza. Israeli isn't 0:01:51.360 --> 0:01:54.440 letting anyone go into Gaza. But there is an organization 0:01:54.520 --> 0:01:59.080 that is helping anyone, anyone whether they are Israeli or 0:01:59.080 --> 0:02:01.560 Palestinian it is on the ground that needs help. It's 0:02:01.600 --> 0:02:07.840 called at Global empower Mint Mission, Global Empowerment Mission, and. 0:02:07.800 --> 0:02:09.960 They're giving aid to everybody. They're already in there. 0:02:10.360 --> 0:02:13.839 I put it on my Instagram page and you can 0:02:14.000 --> 0:02:17.120 follow Mindful Skater Girl also, and she gives information on 0:02:17.160 --> 0:02:17.760 that as well. 0:02:18.080 --> 0:02:19.600 I'll make sure to put a link to that in 0:02:19.639 --> 0:02:21.680 the description as well, so if you want to donate, 0:02:21.720 --> 0:02:25.320 you can go there and help out Chelsea. I do 0:02:25.480 --> 0:02:29.680 have kind of a lovely response to our episode last 0:02:29.680 --> 0:02:32.160 week with Ruby Warrington about not having kids. 0:02:32.800 --> 0:02:34.760 This comes from Deborah. 0:02:35.000 --> 0:02:36.880 She says, I am a seventy two year old woman 0:02:36.919 --> 0:02:39.160 who recently lost the love of my life after forty 0:02:39.160 --> 0:02:42.919 two years. Although he loved children, he respected my decision 0:02:43.160 --> 0:02:45.840 not to have any of our own. Between us, we 0:02:45.880 --> 0:02:49.320 have six nieces and nephews who have produced ten children. 0:02:49.480 --> 0:02:51.520 I love all my great nieces and nephews and have 0:02:51.560 --> 0:02:53.920 a really good time when I'm with them. They consider 0:02:54.000 --> 0:02:56.919 me the fun aunt. I'm always open to whatever challenges 0:02:57.080 --> 0:03:00.160 they present me with, and I've never regretted my descis 0:03:00.400 --> 0:03:02.840 to not have kids. The wonder of children and their 0:03:02.880 --> 0:03:05.519 curiosity of life is a joy that does not necessitate 0:03:05.560 --> 0:03:08.080 being a mother or a grandmother. My husband and I 0:03:08.120 --> 0:03:10.200 have followed you for many years and have always enjoyed 0:03:10.200 --> 0:03:11.280 your comedy and insight. 0:03:11.480 --> 0:03:14.680 Thank you, Deborah well Amen Shellem. 0:03:14.840 --> 0:03:17.679 Yeah, I just love that. Thanks for writing in Deborah. 0:03:17.720 --> 0:03:19.520 Thank you, Chelsea? Where have you been? 0:03:20.200 --> 0:03:20.760 Right now? 0:03:20.919 --> 0:03:23.240 I am living in my neighbor's house because my house 0:03:23.280 --> 0:03:25.959 is still not done Jeeve, so I am this is 0:03:26.000 --> 0:03:27.680 about eight months delayed, Chelsea. 0:03:27.760 --> 0:03:28.880 Day promise right now. 0:03:29.120 --> 0:03:31.760 Anyway, I like to focus on the positive things in life, 0:03:32.160 --> 0:03:34.080 and that is that I have Bernie back in my arms. 0:03:34.160 --> 0:03:37.400 She's looking fitter than ever. Here is a beautiful little baby. 0:03:37.600 --> 0:03:38.080 Look at her. 0:03:38.120 --> 0:03:40.160 Look she's lost weight. My Belle put her back in 0:03:40.240 --> 0:03:43.240 tiptop shape. And she's so sweet. She's even sweeter than 0:03:43.240 --> 0:03:45.440 when I left her. So I mean, I guess yeah. 0:03:45.680 --> 0:03:47.560 My Moll's a really good influence. I mean she only 0:03:47.560 --> 0:03:50.120 speaks Spanish, but that's fine because my Spanish has improved also, 0:03:50.240 --> 0:03:50.600 that's true. 0:03:51.000 --> 0:03:51.680 Giving there we. 0:03:51.640 --> 0:03:52.920 Go, fantastic. 0:03:53.600 --> 0:03:56.720 I have a question for you when you need to 0:03:56.720 --> 0:03:58.040 have a laugh, who do you go. 0:03:57.960 --> 0:03:59.000 To a laugh? 0:03:59.200 --> 0:03:59.720 A laugh? 0:04:00.360 --> 0:04:03.200 Myself? Fuck, I can't depend on anybody for that. 0:04:04.360 --> 0:04:06.080 No one else can be responsible for that. 0:04:06.840 --> 0:04:09.839 Nah, I don't know who I go to for a lot. 0:04:10.120 --> 0:04:14.920 I don't think I go to anyone for specifically no. 0:04:14.080 --> 0:04:16.400 Or like Okay, if you do need to have laugh, 0:04:16.440 --> 0:04:18.479 would you go book or would you go like comedy 0:04:18.480 --> 0:04:19.599 special TV shows. 0:04:19.680 --> 0:04:21.200 No, I don't get that either. 0:04:21.640 --> 0:04:24.400 I don't go I mean, I think there's a lot 0:04:24.400 --> 0:04:26.880 of natural laughter in my life like that. I don't 0:04:27.000 --> 0:04:29.120 have to seek that out. I go to people for 0:04:29.240 --> 0:04:32.840 other things, you know, but not laughter. No, I'm supply 0:04:33.040 --> 0:04:36.920 my own entertainment for myself. Yeah, yeah, can I have 0:04:36.960 --> 0:04:38.880 a fucking blast with myself? 0:04:39.360 --> 0:04:40.919 I mean, nobody gets me like I do. 0:04:41.640 --> 0:04:43.760 You know, I do think that that's the perfect answer. 0:04:43.880 --> 0:04:46.080 I think also, like when you can make yourself laugh, 0:04:46.120 --> 0:04:48.240 I'm definitely somebody. Like if I'm doing like a post 0:04:48.240 --> 0:04:49.600 on Instagram and I think it's funny, I'm like, I 0:04:49.600 --> 0:04:51.360 don't care if anybody else thinks it's funny, Like I'm 0:04:51.400 --> 0:04:53.080 cracking up about it for the next five minutes. 0:04:53.400 --> 0:04:53.960 I just love it. 0:04:54.160 --> 0:04:56.440 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean I don't know a lot 0:04:56.440 --> 0:04:57.679 of books that make me laugh. 0:04:57.839 --> 0:04:59.640 No, there are not a lot of funny books. 0:05:00.000 --> 0:05:03.520 I think that's why yours stand out because they're just ridiculous. 0:05:03.640 --> 0:05:06.560 Yeah, mine are really ridiculous. And David Sedaris will make 0:05:06.600 --> 0:05:07.000 you laugh. 0:05:07.080 --> 0:05:08.000 That's a good author. 0:05:08.560 --> 0:05:11.400 And then there are you know, Sarah Silverman special made 0:05:11.440 --> 0:05:13.800 me fucking laugh my ass off, and she's got a 0:05:13.800 --> 0:05:17.120 new special that'll make you laugh. Yeah, no, I don't know. 0:05:17.560 --> 0:05:20.120 So our guest today is somebody who I have. I'm 0:05:20.240 --> 0:05:22.320 very excited to talk to you because I've read a 0:05:22.400 --> 0:05:25.800 lot of her stuff. She's an essayist and the author 0:05:25.920 --> 0:05:30.839 of METI We are never meeting in real life and wow, no, 0:05:31.000 --> 0:05:31.400 thank you. 0:05:31.880 --> 0:05:33.880 Her new book is called Quietly Hostile. 0:05:34.320 --> 0:05:38.839 It came out in May, so please welcome humorist Samantha Irbie. 0:05:39.120 --> 0:05:48.599 Hello, Oh look who's there? Media scion Samantha Rbie. 0:05:49.520 --> 0:05:53.720 Oh my god, look at you guys. You look so beautiful. 0:05:54.040 --> 0:05:56.160 Why do you have half of your face cut off? 0:05:56.200 --> 0:05:58.039 How are we supposed to even recognize you? 0:05:58.120 --> 0:06:01.280 Fully? You have to flip it and reverse it, back 0:06:01.320 --> 0:06:01.760 it up. 0:06:02.360 --> 0:06:08.200 Okay, here's the thing. My desk covered in garbage, and 0:06:08.320 --> 0:06:12.839 I can't push. 0:06:11.800 --> 0:06:14.080 Die down and just pop your head up. 0:06:14.200 --> 0:06:15.520 So oh wait, here we go. 0:06:16.000 --> 0:06:21.320 Thank you ye of your full face? That's all. Hi, 0:06:21.360 --> 0:06:24.400 Samantha Irbie, how are you? I am? 0:06:24.440 --> 0:06:30.360 My sweetheart? Okay, I know everybody comes on and it's 0:06:30.360 --> 0:06:34.520 probably like Chelsea, I love you so much, but I 0:06:34.560 --> 0:06:35.080 really do. 0:06:35.320 --> 0:06:39.080 They don't do that, and they don't. 0:06:39.200 --> 0:06:40.400 Okay, well then I forget. 0:06:40.480 --> 0:06:44.640 Let me be the fucking first and say that are 0:06:44.680 --> 0:06:50.120 you there, vodka? It's me, Chelsea. Is the first audiobook 0:06:50.440 --> 0:06:56.440 I ever listened to, and I count you among one 0:06:56.440 --> 0:07:01.120 of the few people who I ate it possible to 0:07:01.200 --> 0:07:06.320 like talk about your bullshit in a book that people 0:07:06.360 --> 0:07:12.880 would buy and read, and it's funny and anyway, without you, 0:07:13.000 --> 0:07:14.600 there's no me. 0:07:15.800 --> 0:07:19.280 Well that's wonderful because I'm actually Samantha's birth mother, and 0:07:19.280 --> 0:07:21.000 that's what this is podcast is all about. 0:07:21.040 --> 0:07:24.560 This is our twenty three in Me episode. And actually, Samantha, 0:07:24.840 --> 0:07:25.520 you have a lot. 0:07:25.360 --> 0:07:27.480 Of siblings that you're about to learn about too, So 0:07:27.640 --> 0:07:29.119 I hope that you're in a good mood. 0:07:29.480 --> 0:07:32.520 Okay, I'm fine to meet them, as long as you 0:07:32.640 --> 0:07:35.760 tell me upfront that I'm your favorite. 0:07:35.960 --> 0:07:39.240 Oh, you're my favorite, obviously. You know I'm not an 0:07:39.280 --> 0:07:42.920 idiot about favorites. Who's whoever I'm talking to. I just 0:07:43.000 --> 0:07:46.120 want to say that I became familiar with you by 0:07:46.280 --> 0:07:48.120 I think it was an excerpt that they had printed 0:07:48.120 --> 0:07:50.000 from one of your books in the La Times, and 0:07:50.040 --> 0:07:52.200 I thought, oh wow, what a breath of fresh air. 0:07:52.760 --> 0:07:55.440 And then right when I became familiar with you, everyone 0:07:55.600 --> 0:07:58.200 in my world started bringing you up to me because 0:07:58.240 --> 0:08:01.040 you have such a unique writing style and you're, I 0:08:01.040 --> 0:08:02.200 would say, a humorist. 0:08:02.240 --> 0:08:03.040 Would you agree with that? 0:08:03.920 --> 0:08:06.920 Yes, it's a weird word. 0:08:07.120 --> 0:08:07.320 Right. 0:08:07.360 --> 0:08:11.880 It feels fancier than what it is I think I do. 0:08:11.880 --> 0:08:14.400 Do you think essays is fancier than humorists? 0:08:15.000 --> 0:08:19.040 Essays is too fancy because like I feel like, you know, 0:08:19.200 --> 0:08:23.920 David from or somebody is writing like essays. But if 0:08:23.960 --> 0:08:27.320 you say comedian, people are people assume stand up and 0:08:27.360 --> 0:08:31.440 I would never do stand up. I'm too sensitive. I 0:08:31.480 --> 0:08:35.560 cannot have people walking in the door like primed to 0:08:35.640 --> 0:08:38.480 call me a fabage before they even sit down. I 0:08:38.520 --> 0:08:45.439 can't do that. So, yeah, humorist works. There's no good 0:08:45.559 --> 0:08:47.160 word funny person. 0:08:47.320 --> 0:08:48.400 I know there really is. 0:08:48.440 --> 0:08:51.840 There's a language that has so many words that mean 0:08:51.880 --> 0:08:53.800 the same fucking thing. You think they would be able 0:08:53.880 --> 0:08:55.640 to come up with a new one or two to 0:08:55.720 --> 0:09:01.679 describe very particular professions moods, you know, behaviors. 0:09:02.080 --> 0:09:05.680 Yeah, wait, what do you call yourself? Are you like actor? 0:09:06.080 --> 0:09:08.920 I don't, I mean, I just I can't. People call 0:09:09.000 --> 0:09:13.040 me sometimes a writer a comedian essays two, I'm like essays, 0:09:13.360 --> 0:09:15.240 that's not I don't know an essay if it hit 0:09:15.240 --> 0:09:18.679 me in the fucking face. My writing is like basically 0:09:18.760 --> 0:09:21.400 just learned out of every editor I've ever worked with. 0:09:21.480 --> 0:09:24.240 I never had any formal training except for David Sad 0:09:24.720 --> 0:09:27.720 and reading his books, and I just started once I 0:09:27.760 --> 0:09:30.120 realized that you could do whatever the fuck you felt 0:09:30.160 --> 0:09:33.880 like as a writer. Not that everyone is successful at 0:09:33.960 --> 0:09:35.560 doing that, but you can do that. 0:09:35.960 --> 0:09:38.640 And the beautiful part about doing what. 0:09:38.520 --> 0:09:41.400 You want and how you would want to read is 0:09:41.440 --> 0:09:44.199 that you're being honest and you have a real point 0:09:44.240 --> 0:09:46.240 of view. And when you have a real point of view, 0:09:46.240 --> 0:09:48.480 that's when you attract people. You know, That's when people 0:09:48.520 --> 0:09:53.280 become well known, is because they are sharing something very 0:09:53.360 --> 0:09:56.840 real to them. So I loved when I heard that advice, 0:09:56.960 --> 0:10:00.600 like just be yourself and I think that that and 0:10:00.640 --> 0:10:02.520 you're writing too, that this is the way that you 0:10:02.559 --> 0:10:05.680 look at things in a very authentic way and see things. 0:10:06.080 --> 0:10:09.000 Yeah, I have had I'm with you on the no 0:10:09.480 --> 0:10:14.480 formal training. That's another reason why when when people say essayist, 0:10:15.240 --> 0:10:18.880 I'm like, I couldn't write a persuasive essay if you 0:10:19.040 --> 0:10:22.120 wrote half of it for me, right, That's not really 0:10:22.200 --> 0:10:25.400 what I do. But they call it essays because that's 0:10:25.559 --> 0:10:30.040 easier than printed out blogs or whatever the fuck I 0:10:30.160 --> 0:10:32.079 would call it a vlog. 0:10:32.320 --> 0:10:34.200 I'm gonna speak for you right now, and I know 0:10:34.280 --> 0:10:35.440 that you would call it a vlog. 0:10:35.840 --> 0:10:39.120 Yes I would. I'm glad and maybe this is me 0:10:39.320 --> 0:10:42.240 just trying to put lipstick on a pig, but I 0:10:42.280 --> 0:10:48.720 am glad that I don't have any MFA professor voice 0:10:48.920 --> 0:10:51.840 in my head telling me that I suck, telling me 0:10:51.920 --> 0:10:55.160 that the form is wrong, telling me that it's bullshit. 0:10:55.880 --> 0:10:58.600 Like people ask for writing advice and it's like impossible 0:10:58.640 --> 0:11:02.360 to give. But what I I always say is write 0:11:02.360 --> 0:11:05.760 what you want right because your editor's gonna fix it 0:11:05.840 --> 0:11:08.480 and fuck around with it and change it. The publisher 0:11:08.559 --> 0:11:11.080 is gonna have something to say. So if you start 0:11:11.120 --> 0:11:18.720 out writing what you want, eventually it'll feel natural and 0:11:20.080 --> 0:11:22.960 most of you will come through on the page. I'm 0:11:23.000 --> 0:11:26.439 at the point now where they don't really change mind, 0:11:27.760 --> 0:11:31.360 Like they fix the errors, but it's never like this 0:11:31.520 --> 0:11:33.760 story needs a little more piss, you know what I mean. 0:11:33.760 --> 0:11:37.160 They leave me alone, and I feel very lucky. But 0:11:37.520 --> 0:11:40.559 I really do just like write whatever the fuck I want, 0:11:40.800 --> 0:11:43.960 how I want, and I don't even have to convince 0:11:44.040 --> 0:11:48.800 them that people will buy it, which is amazing. At 0:11:48.800 --> 0:11:53.079 this point it took a few boots and now they're like, Oh, 0:11:53.280 --> 0:11:57.600 you're gonna write about this porn you watched. Okay, people 0:11:58.120 --> 0:12:00.600 hope we'll buy that. Well. 0:12:00.600 --> 0:12:03.000 And I think that's something that you sam are so 0:12:03.120 --> 0:12:06.400 good at, is inserting your personality into stuff. I was 0:12:06.480 --> 0:12:08.719 reading just like a little listical. I think it was 0:12:08.760 --> 0:12:11.839 on the strategist of like stuff that you bought recently. 0:12:11.679 --> 0:12:13.960 And it's so funny. It was one of my favorite things. 0:12:13.800 --> 0:12:14.680 I've read recently. 0:12:14.880 --> 0:12:16.760 I was like, this sound machine sounds like something I 0:12:16.760 --> 0:12:17.320 should buy. 0:12:18.240 --> 0:12:19.920 Okay, you should. 0:12:20.480 --> 0:12:24.960 It's very cheap sound. I mean, I have to listen 0:12:24.960 --> 0:12:27.200 to sound every night. I'm like a baby me too. 0:12:27.760 --> 0:12:30.280 I need a fan a rainstorm, and I need to 0:12:30.280 --> 0:12:32.120 hear my dog within like six feet. 0:12:32.720 --> 0:12:35.320 Does your dog sleep in the bed when I trap her? 0:12:35.320 --> 0:12:35.959 Fucking ass? 0:12:36.000 --> 0:12:37.920 She does when I trap her and pull away the 0:12:37.960 --> 0:12:39.920 doggy steps and she has no retreat. 0:12:40.160 --> 0:12:40.720 That's right. 0:12:41.080 --> 0:12:43.560 But I also just started this is a little bit 0:12:43.640 --> 0:12:46.720 more sishy, but somebody sent me a rose Quartz eyeshade. 0:12:47.040 --> 0:12:47.920 I always wear eye. 0:12:47.840 --> 0:12:49.440 Shades because I have to be in the dark, and 0:12:49.480 --> 0:12:51.120 sometimes I end up just putting a T shirt over 0:12:51.200 --> 0:12:53.120 my head, like a condom because I can't find my 0:12:53.160 --> 0:12:55.000 eye shade because I'm too stone at the end of 0:12:55.000 --> 0:12:58.079 the night, which has been an ongoing saga quite frankly, 0:12:58.280 --> 0:13:00.280 and I wish somebody would be able to I can 0:13:00.400 --> 0:13:03.200 nip it in the bud for me. AnyWho, I wore 0:13:03.240 --> 0:13:05.120 this quartz eyeshit, and I got to tell you, like, 0:13:05.200 --> 0:13:08.160 my face felt so good and it stayed on all night. 0:13:08.200 --> 0:13:08.840 It's quartz. 0:13:09.200 --> 0:13:11.520 Yeah, it's rose Quartz. I mean it's from some brand 0:13:11.520 --> 0:13:13.120 that I never plugged that I'm loving. 0:13:13.800 --> 0:13:16.880 So look at that's incredible. I'm gonna have to do 0:13:16.920 --> 0:13:22.160 that because I too am a late night stonar. Oh 0:13:22.240 --> 0:13:24.680 my god, Like, nothing is better. 0:13:24.960 --> 0:13:27.000 Where do you live, Samantha. Are you in New York 0:13:27.080 --> 0:13:27.680 or La? 0:13:27.840 --> 0:13:30.439 No, I am in Kalamazoo, Michigan. 0:13:32.040 --> 0:13:33.439 That's very suspect. 0:13:33.920 --> 0:13:39.920 I am a child of the Midwest. Well, I'm from 0:13:40.240 --> 0:13:45.560 just north of Chicago, which is better than Keith Listen. 0:13:45.640 --> 0:13:47.800 I just had two shows in Kalamazoo a couple of 0:13:47.840 --> 0:13:48.320 months ago. 0:13:48.440 --> 0:13:51.040 Oh bitch, we couldn't go because they sold out. 0:13:51.160 --> 0:13:53.720 Oh you should have contacted me. I would have totally 0:13:53.760 --> 0:13:56.439 gotten you hooked up. That would have been Oh they 0:13:56.480 --> 0:13:59.200 sold out. The same thing to say, there's always a way. 0:14:00.120 --> 0:14:03.920 I don't have that kind of nerve. Now that we've 0:14:04.000 --> 0:14:06.400 met and i'm seeing you face to face, I'm gonna 0:14:06.400 --> 0:14:12.959 message you about everything. But then what if you were like, bitch, no, 0:14:13.320 --> 0:14:15.840 who are you? I would have dropped dead. 0:14:16.000 --> 0:14:16.880 No, I don't do that. 0:14:17.600 --> 0:14:19.560 I do I help strangers that I don't know if 0:14:19.560 --> 0:14:21.280 they're looking for tickets. I mean, I don't help them 0:14:21.320 --> 0:14:23.680 by giving them because word got out about that, but 0:14:23.720 --> 0:14:25.760 I direct that to my fucking website. 0:14:25.920 --> 0:14:28.120 Oh you know where, I'm coming to, Detroit. That's not 0:14:28.160 --> 0:14:28.720 far from health. 0:14:28.880 --> 0:14:29.760 Ce you in Detroit. 0:14:29.800 --> 0:14:32.080 Oh yeah, okay, we'll hook her up with Detroit tickets. 0:14:32.160 --> 0:14:32.800 That's perfect. 0:14:33.200 --> 0:14:35.960 I'll come see you. It'll be great. But yeah, I'm 0:14:36.000 --> 0:14:41.040 in Kalamazoo because my wife lived here and she has kids. 0:14:41.320 --> 0:14:43.760 Well, your wife is still living there. Actually it's not 0:14:43.880 --> 0:14:46.000 past tests and now you live there. 0:14:46.080 --> 0:14:49.080 So when we met, she lived here, and when we 0:14:49.160 --> 0:14:53.720 decided to get married and live together, I had no 0:14:53.920 --> 0:14:57.640 dog in the fight, you know, as the childless one, 0:14:57.920 --> 0:15:01.360 I could not be like, well Chicago is better. You 0:15:01.440 --> 0:15:05.040 know that doesn't fly. So now I live here. But 0:15:05.160 --> 0:15:07.680 you know what, I'm getting used to it I like it. 0:15:07.720 --> 0:15:09.880 I think, what are the differences that you've noticed, or 0:15:09.920 --> 0:15:11.400 like the things in the beginning that you thought were 0:15:11.400 --> 0:15:13.600 a little bit shocking but that you've since warmed up to. 0:15:14.160 --> 0:15:17.360 Okay, well this donna sound fucked up if I say 0:15:17.400 --> 0:15:20.720 I've warmed up to it. But there's not a lot 0:15:20.840 --> 0:15:26.320 of ethnic food, lots of different kinds of people. But 0:15:26.480 --> 0:15:30.400 if you want to get like Thai food or Ethiopian food, 0:15:31.080 --> 0:15:35.080 you have to drive to another town that's probably forty 0:15:35.080 --> 0:15:38.680 five minutes to an hour away at least. And like, 0:15:38.920 --> 0:15:41.600 that was a you know, Chicago's a big food town, 0:15:42.120 --> 0:15:44.200 and it was a big bummer to move here and 0:15:44.240 --> 0:15:48.760 be like, Okay, we got like two nice restaurants we 0:15:48.840 --> 0:15:51.200 can go to and a few others we can pick 0:15:51.240 --> 0:15:54.960 stuff up from. But I'm used to it now and 0:15:55.000 --> 0:15:58.600 it's fine, you know, Okay, it's fine. Well that's good. 0:15:58.760 --> 0:15:59.960 There's no traffic. 0:16:00.520 --> 0:16:03.800 That's nice. Yeah, that is really nice. Because you've lived 0:16:03.800 --> 0:16:05.320 in LA and New York, haven't you. 0:16:06.000 --> 0:16:08.400 I've lived in LA for a few months, never in 0:16:08.480 --> 0:16:11.560 New York. I have to go there for work, But 0:16:11.760 --> 0:16:12.880 I hate New York. 0:16:12.920 --> 0:16:13.840 Oh you do do you? 0:16:14.080 --> 0:16:14.400 What do you? 0:16:14.440 --> 0:16:17.520 Because do you have you have OCD. Yeah, yes, does 0:16:17.560 --> 0:16:19.880 that play into your hatred of New York. 0:16:20.120 --> 0:16:25.800 Well a little because it's so filthy. It's just so. 0:16:28.200 --> 0:16:32.880 I stepped in a bag of vomit in the middle 0:16:33.080 --> 0:16:38.800 of Lexington. It was like ten years ago, and I 0:16:38.840 --> 0:16:42.120 can still feel my toe. 0:16:42.520 --> 0:16:45.080 I can feel what you're describing. 0:16:45.520 --> 0:16:48.040 And I was like, this, fuck, I hate this fucking town. 0:16:48.320 --> 0:16:51.800 Every time I'm there, something in I'd see something insane 0:16:52.200 --> 0:16:56.360 that's totally normal to everyone who's there, and I'm like, 0:16:56.520 --> 0:17:00.000 how do you get used to this? No ty food, 0:17:00.320 --> 0:17:04.240 I can get used to act. The vomit in the street. 0:17:04.080 --> 0:17:04.960 You can't get used to. 0:17:05.760 --> 0:17:08.399 There is a feculence that is roaming. And this is 0:17:08.400 --> 0:17:11.080 in San Francisco too, because I visit my sister quite 0:17:11.160 --> 0:17:14.359 often and I am alarmed by what goes on in 0:17:14.400 --> 0:17:17.960 San Francisco. It's just defecation on the streets. You just 0:17:18.000 --> 0:17:20.560 walk by piles of human shit. And I remember the 0:17:20.600 --> 0:17:22.520 first time someone pointed it out to me and I 0:17:22.600 --> 0:17:25.040 was like, how do you know that's human shit? They're like, Chelsea, 0:17:25.160 --> 0:17:27.640 you could tell the difference. I was like, since when 0:17:28.000 --> 0:17:30.639 I haven't been charatering human shit to know that I 0:17:30.880 --> 0:17:33.760 there was a difference between dog shit and human shit. 0:17:33.880 --> 0:17:36.480 What is the difference and apparently there is a big one. 0:17:36.720 --> 0:17:43.400 Oh God, talk to me a little. 0:17:43.160 --> 0:17:45.119 Bit more about your OCD and how that works with 0:17:45.200 --> 0:17:46.560 being such a successful writer. 0:17:46.920 --> 0:17:52.879 The OCD I was diagnosed like nine or ten months ago, 0:17:53.680 --> 0:17:58.040 because I, Oh, forgive me for how this sounds, but 0:17:58.200 --> 0:18:01.320 just work with me. I I kind of leaned into 0:18:01.400 --> 0:18:04.320 the pandemic. I was like, Oh, this isn't bad. I 0:18:04.359 --> 0:18:06.679 had a book come out in March of twenty twenty. 0:18:06.760 --> 0:18:10.080 I didn't have to tour. They just delivered cases of 0:18:10.119 --> 0:18:12.800 books to my house and people ordered them and I 0:18:12.920 --> 0:18:15.639 personalized them and sent them out and it was great. 0:18:15.880 --> 0:18:17.679 I didn't have to do anything. I didn't have to 0:18:17.720 --> 0:18:21.280 go anywhere. And then like a year into it, I 0:18:21.359 --> 0:18:26.680 was like, oh, I'm actually like losing my mind. And 0:18:26.720 --> 0:18:30.560 then when things opened up and we could go places, 0:18:31.119 --> 0:18:35.919 I found that I was terrified of everyone. And that's 0:18:36.520 --> 0:18:39.840 not me right, Like I'm not I'm a friendly person. 0:18:39.920 --> 0:18:43.120 I'm fine out in public, but I was super hyper vigilant. 0:18:43.200 --> 0:18:46.440 I thought someone was gonna attack me, or someone was 0:18:46.480 --> 0:18:48.680 going to run me off the road. So I got 0:18:48.720 --> 0:18:52.640 a psychiatrist and just told her about myself and at 0:18:52.640 --> 0:18:55.679 the end she was like, I know you think you 0:18:55.800 --> 0:18:59.240 have bad anxiety and depression, and you do have anxiety, 0:18:59.359 --> 0:19:03.399 but your biggest problem is that you have OCD. And 0:19:03.640 --> 0:19:07.679 I was like, whoa, So the way mine manifests. I 0:19:07.760 --> 0:19:11.000 don't have a lot of ooh, I forget what they're called, 0:19:11.080 --> 0:19:13.600 but you know, like the people who scrub their hands 0:19:13.680 --> 0:19:16.639 and check, I don't have a lot of those. I 0:19:16.680 --> 0:19:22.720 have a few bad ones, like I can't touch money, 0:19:22.920 --> 0:19:24.480 like physical money. 0:19:24.840 --> 0:19:29.000 Oh good, there's none left anyway solved. I mean you 0:19:29.040 --> 0:19:30.400 just have to use credit cards. 0:19:30.800 --> 0:19:33.639 Yeah. As a kid, though, it was like if you 0:19:33.880 --> 0:19:36.760 tried to hand me a bunch of loose change, I 0:19:36.960 --> 0:19:37.960 couldn't touch selling. 0:19:39.160 --> 0:19:41.160 I wouldn't wash my hands after that, and I don't 0:19:41.200 --> 0:19:42.520 wash my hands after after a lot. 0:19:42.600 --> 0:19:43.160 I'll be honest. 0:19:43.240 --> 0:19:45.480 You know what. The most horrifying thing on earth to 0:19:45.560 --> 0:19:49.600 me is to see someone like pay for something with 0:19:49.800 --> 0:19:53.919 real money and then put their hands on food and 0:19:54.080 --> 0:19:56.640 eat that food and may, oh my god, I. 0:19:56.680 --> 0:19:59.439