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Speaker 1: The Nicky Nikki. Hey guys, Happy Wednesday out there, besties,

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Speaker 1: That's what I call you. If you're a new listener,

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Speaker 1: welcome to the show. Nick It's a group of buppy

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Speaker 1: kick got Google. It's Nicki Gleiser podcast. Uh, we have

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Speaker 1: such a great show today. How do I know? Because

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Speaker 1: I already taped it. Yes, I'm doing that. I usually

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Speaker 1: do the intro. We always do the show like in time.

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Speaker 1: But today, Uh, Andrew had to check out of his

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Speaker 1: hotel and so and I was running late because I

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Speaker 1: slept too late. Because so you're about to hear a

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Speaker 1: great show. That's that's the good news is that I

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Speaker 1: can give you this report. Had Pete Lee is on

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Speaker 1: the show today, comedian Pete Lee. We discuss how we

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Speaker 1: fell in love. He was my first love. Uh. He

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Speaker 1: was probably the deepest love I've ever well, it was

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Speaker 1: it was it was. It was the top love I

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Speaker 1: ever felt. It was a young love. It was fast. Um,

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Speaker 1: and now he's one of my very best friends. And

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Speaker 1: it was funny because the other night I saw him

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Speaker 1: at Ben Gleeve's party, and um, we were talking about

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Speaker 1: we're both going through some pain right now, and we

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Speaker 1: were talking about like um, just like how much we

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Speaker 1: love each other as friends, and we're like, oh, we

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Speaker 1: were so in love then, and this love, the love

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Speaker 1: that we had then was a romantic love, but it

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Speaker 1: is the same love in terms of like just the

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Speaker 1: there's it's so interesting you can have that kind of

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Speaker 1: like obsessive love and then look at someone down the

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Speaker 1: line and be like they're my friend and like, it's not.

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Speaker 1: It's never like that with us anymore. We did it

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Speaker 1: at one point. So you'll hear the story of how

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Speaker 1: we got together in a little bit and and how

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Speaker 1: that all happened when Pete and Andrew join us. But uh,

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Speaker 1: what I don't talk about is how we started talking

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Speaker 1: again eventually after eleven years of me not talking to

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Speaker 1: him after he broke my heart, and um, then we

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Speaker 1: started talking again because I ended up hating another guy

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Speaker 1: as much as I hated him, and I couldn't. I

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Speaker 1: didn't have room to hate two people that much. So

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Speaker 1: it like freed up a space in my heart. And

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Speaker 1: Pete and I were, you know, was eleven years down

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Speaker 1: the road. We're seeing each other comedy clubs all the time,

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Speaker 1: and so I eventually gave in and was like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm down to be friends, I guess like, and he

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Speaker 1: apologized for what he had done to me and all

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Speaker 1: this stuff, and I didn't apologize for my part in it,

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Speaker 1: which I still owe him an apology. Probably no that

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Speaker 1: I'm saying this, but um, yeah, we became friends again

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Speaker 1: and we started talking and there was and he was

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Speaker 1: in he was in a relationship when we kind of reconnected.

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Speaker 1: But then um, that relationship started going like not good.

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Speaker 1: And then we were talking again. And you'll see later

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Speaker 1: on that we first got together, he had a girlfriend,

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Speaker 1: and so this history was repeating itself, like ten years

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Speaker 1: later when we reconnected and he had a girlfriend, and

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Speaker 1: I was like, we're connecting, like we're friends now, but

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Speaker 1: like this connection, like there's something here that's I can

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Speaker 1: tell you like me more than your girlfriend and I

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Speaker 1: like you too, probably, but I can't do this again,

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Speaker 1: So I go call me this after I gave him,

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Speaker 1: I said, call me when you're single. It's not gonna

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Speaker 1: be too long because you your relationship. You're gonna see

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Speaker 1: how terrible it is because I'm giving you this like

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Speaker 1: thing that you didn't that you're you know, when you

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Speaker 1: take away the thing that guys can a lot of

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Speaker 1: times guys who are like, uh, supplementing the things they're

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Speaker 1: not getting in the relationship with outside uh women or

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Speaker 1: other people, like whether it's just like emotional support, because

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Speaker 1: that was what it was. Pete and I weren't doing

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Speaker 1: anything elicit. Uh. The second time around, we were just

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Speaker 1: really close friends. But I knew that he had me

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Speaker 1: in his phone as not Nicki Glazer. You know, I knew.

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Speaker 1: I knew it wasn't something she knew about how much

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Speaker 1: we were talking. And I said, yeah, as soon as

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Speaker 1: I go away, you're gonna see what you're lacking in

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Speaker 1: your relationship because I was. I was that tent pole

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Speaker 1: for you. And I told him, I go, your tent

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Speaker 1: is going to fall. You can't. You don't have my

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Speaker 1: tent pole anymore. It's one part of the tent, but

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Speaker 1: the tent is gonna suck. And yeah, you got drenched.

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Speaker 1: The storm came, the tent sucked. And he called me

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Speaker 1: one day, I think it was three weeks after I

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Speaker 1: told him, don't talk to me until you're single. Like it.

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Speaker 1: I'll maybe entertained being your friend again, but this is

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Speaker 1: just it feels not good. And he wrote me, he goes,

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Speaker 1: I'm single and I just go ha ha. I laughed,

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Speaker 1: and he was like really sad because he was going

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Speaker 1: through a breakup. And I was like, oh wait, I forgot.

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Speaker 1: This isn't like good news for you too. And I

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Speaker 1: was like, let's get through it. And then we ended up,

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Speaker 1: like you know, he was free then, and I was like,

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Speaker 1: I'm out of something too. I go, let's just we

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Speaker 1: had a good sexual connection one time ten or so

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Speaker 1: years ago. Let's hook up again and see what happens.

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Speaker 1: I go, let's project our heartache onto each other by

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Speaker 1: having sex. We've done it before, and we met up

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Speaker 1: to go. He flew to l A to have sex

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Speaker 1: with me from New York and to like go on

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Speaker 1: a date ten years later, and we met up and um,

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Speaker 1: it just was it was friends. It was friends friend zone.

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Speaker 1: Like we both were just like yeah, you know. And

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Speaker 1: then I went over to this hotel because I was

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Speaker 1: still like maybe I like, I got my dogs a babysitter.

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Speaker 1: I was like, I'm going out tonight. I'm gonna have

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Speaker 1: sex with this guy that I like used to love

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Speaker 1: and now we're reconnecting. And I go over there and

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Speaker 1: I was just like, I'm just really feeling a friend vibe.

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Speaker 1: Is that okay? And he was like yes, and I

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Speaker 1: was like, can I still spend the night? And we

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Speaker 1: slept in the same bed. We had a great night

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Speaker 1: and we've been best friends ever since. And it's a

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Speaker 1: lovely little little story and I'm so excited to have

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Speaker 1: him on the show later. Boy. History just keeps repeating itself, though. Um,

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Speaker 1: yesterday was I was in a uh I called it

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Speaker 1: a pod rage, which I think I'm going to coin

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Speaker 1: that like I went I was pod raging yesterday. Definitely

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Speaker 1: was in a mood. I can't hide it from you guys, Um,

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Speaker 1: but it helps me the rest of the day because

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Speaker 1: they let me get my anger out a little bit,

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Speaker 1: and then I was able to cope with a very

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Speaker 1: hard day yesterday in um in a way that I

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Speaker 1: wouldn't have been able to without the support of the podcast.

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Speaker 1: So thank you, guys, and uh, I need this as

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Speaker 1: much as maybe you need it, maybe don't need it, um,

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Speaker 1: but I'm glad you're listening and I appreciate it. Noah,

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Speaker 1: how are you doing today? I'm doing great, I mean,

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Speaker 1: especially since it's after the show and I have like

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Speaker 1: my after show, like hyper We definitely had a really

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Speaker 1: fun time. What you're about to hear? UM, Yeah, I uh,

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Speaker 1: I know I want to say to you. We talked

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Speaker 1: about it a little bit. But yesterday, during the day

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Speaker 1: of UM, the stressful day that I had which I

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Speaker 1: can't go into UM, an insane thing happened. An insane

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Speaker 1: thing that I cannot wait to tell you as about

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Speaker 1: down the road. It's just I need distance, but truly

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Speaker 1: insane And no, uh, you have the best reaction of everyone.

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Speaker 1: Like I, I called everyone last night. I like it

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Speaker 1: happened late at night and I just everyone in my phone.

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Speaker 1: I reached out to anyone who knew the whole story

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Speaker 1: beyond it. I called you and or I texted you.

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Speaker 1: And I woke up this morning and you were the

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Speaker 1: only one who threatened violence to the person. UM. That yes,

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Speaker 1: and I want to thank you Nikki and um. Everyone

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Speaker 1: will know about this soon, but I'm going to have

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Speaker 1: a great time in my jiu jitsu class later, So

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Speaker 1: thank you. It's gonna it's gonna help me. I like

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Speaker 1: of everyone that wrote back to me about the incident,

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Speaker 1: I shared UM. And I'm not trying to be uh,

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Speaker 1: you know, optus for you guys, because I want to

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Speaker 1: leave you out. I wish I could tell all my besties,

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Speaker 1: and you know I would if I met you, and

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Speaker 1: I'm helking a lot it will yeah, Um, I I

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Speaker 1: have no It's just I'm trying to protect people from

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Speaker 1: Noah's rage. But um, yeah, you you saying like you

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Speaker 1: you wish you would have been there because you would

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Speaker 1: have like had a physical altercation in which you would

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Speaker 1: have come out. I had really made me happy, and

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't have liked that for you. And I don't like, um,

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Speaker 1: you know, physical violence. But listen, when you have a

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Speaker 1: girlfriend who could whoop some ass and she says that

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Speaker 1: she wishes she were there so she could have whooped

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Speaker 1: some ass for you, like, it feels good. I feel

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Speaker 1: like you. It really means a lot to me. I so, Um,

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Speaker 1: I just think it's really important for women to know

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Speaker 1: self defense. And when my best friend's security happens to

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Speaker 1: be like you know in question that it just makes

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Speaker 1: me feel very protective of the friend that is in

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Speaker 1: that situation. And um, thank you. It means I like

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Speaker 1: your anger makes me feel loved, Like it's like you're

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Speaker 1: a boyfriend that I want. Like the way that you're

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Speaker 1: like that should have never happened to you, and I

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Speaker 1: want to protect you. That's the that's what I'm looking for,

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Speaker 1: a person who might be listening that could have maybe

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Speaker 1: done something to protect me and didn't. Um, it just

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Speaker 1: meant a lot. Your security is very important to me,

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Speaker 1: and I do think about that because you you know,

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Speaker 1: like you're a rising star, but you're very grounded and

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Speaker 1: down to earth and I don't know, like I have

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Speaker 1: to be honest with you. I do think about that

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Speaker 1: a lot. Thank you, Noah, I really appreciate it. And I, uh, yeah,

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Speaker 1: you're the only friend that was like I would I

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Speaker 1: would have stepped in. And my other friends are like,

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Speaker 1: well you look into a restraining order. I have a

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Speaker 1: friend at the FBI, and I'm like, no, well, you

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Speaker 1: just offered to whoop some ass on my bed. I

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Speaker 1: just wanted done, you know already Yeah, Like I already

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Speaker 1: envisioned what I would have done, and I would have

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Speaker 1: just like ran in there, done a double leg tackle

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Speaker 1: neon belly and like you know, some kind of joint manipulation.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, I'm so flattered. I like have a

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Speaker 1: crush on you now because I feel so like a

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Speaker 1: damsel in distress. Um, that's like so so nice. Um, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mean it's it was. It was a wild, wild day,

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Speaker 1: but it was one that left me, uh truly cracking

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Speaker 1: up at the end of the day of like what

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Speaker 1: is my life? And what have I got myself? Them?

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Speaker 1: Two good? Um, But what I'm about to get ourselves

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Speaker 1: into is a lot of fun with Petelee and Andrew

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Speaker 1: in which we allude to this stuff and we have

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Speaker 1: a really good time. So thank you guys for listening.

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Speaker 1: It's like I'm ending the show because to me, this

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Speaker 1: this is the last thing I'm recording. The show's just begun.

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Speaker 1: Let's get Andrew in here. Hey, Andrew, what this is

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Speaker 1: the top of the show. I want to be honest

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Speaker 1: with people. I'll tell people at the beginning that I'm

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Speaker 1: I'm shooting the first part later because running a little

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Speaker 1: late today. How did you sleep? Because I slept in

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Speaker 1: I know you called me. I woke up. I didn't

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Speaker 1: know you called me. I got a call at one

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Speaker 1: Eastern time. So it's not crazy. No, it wasn't crazy

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Speaker 1: before too. Hey bars close at four there, Okay, it's

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Speaker 1: four o'clock somewhere, you know, listen. I I had an

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Speaker 1: emergency last night. I had. I had to call you.

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Speaker 1: I called everyone. I tried to call my grandma. She's dead.

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Speaker 1: I had, I had, you know everything? What do you say?

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Speaker 1: I was gonna say. She probably answered before I didn't

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Speaker 1: because your boy was sleeping good in a hotel. But yes,

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Speaker 1: uh do you have your ring around? Did it ring? Like?

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Speaker 1: Do you sleep vibrated? Okay, I don't. I don't my

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Speaker 1: ringer on at night? What is this the morning show? Us?

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Speaker 1: Something we know? Wait? Wait the morning show? Oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: people keep the ring or something. If you keep I

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Speaker 1: was going to admonish you if you got the ringer on,

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Speaker 1: because it's like that would make your people who keep

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Speaker 1: their phones the sound on. When people are like everyone

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Speaker 1: silence your phones, I'm like, who has not already silenced

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Speaker 1: their phone? Like I would my phone anytime I lose

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Speaker 1: my phone, they're like call it. I go, are you joke?

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Speaker 1: Who are you that you have your phone on on? No?

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Speaker 1: I love when an older person gets a ring and

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Speaker 1: then it's it's rung two to three times and they're

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Speaker 1: looking at their phone while it's ringing to see who's calling,

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Speaker 1: while ringing like five or six times, and it's just yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's wild it's wild, it's nuts. So I called you. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's okay. I I got support from a

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Speaker 1: third aunt who I haven't talked to ever. I found

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Speaker 1: her on twenty three and me I just needed to

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Speaker 1: connect with someone. Last night. I called literally everyone like

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Speaker 1: I was. You know, when you go through your context

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Speaker 1: to look like for like to invite people to a

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Speaker 1: party or something, you're like, I'll just go through everyone

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Speaker 1: I know. Literally, I was going through everyone I know

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Speaker 1: to be like, who can I tell the story to

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Speaker 1: god fashion egg? I have so much to tell all

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Speaker 1: of you yesterday, right, I guess yeah. I mean it's

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Speaker 1: going to be in my book, It'll be in my special,

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Speaker 1: it'll be in uh, it'll all. You know, you as

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Speaker 1: an artist, you need a little bit of distance from

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Speaker 1: things that happened in your life. But you know, we'll

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Speaker 1: be dropping fashion eggs all over the place. If you're

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Speaker 1: just joining the show. A fashion egg is um an

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Speaker 1: easter egg. It's an easter Eggs are obviously like clues

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Speaker 1: about something that you can't maybe share at the time,

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Speaker 1: or that's like a secret thing that if you put

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Speaker 1: it all together, you could probably figure out what's going on.

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Speaker 1: But you have to be a very savvy listener, and um,

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Speaker 1: I'm really turning into a Taylor Swift. I was so

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Speaker 1: proud of myself yesterday because I put on I did

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Speaker 1: so many fashion eggs yesterday all over my um social

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Speaker 1: media and like if if, if the fans are paying attention,

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Speaker 1: they could maybe get something. But Taylor Swift does fashion

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Speaker 1: eggs all or Easter eggs all the time, like every

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Speaker 1: every tailor Swift fan counts. Like she'll put up a

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Speaker 1: picture and people will like and it's her, like standing

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Speaker 1: behind a night sky and people will count the stars

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Speaker 1: in the galaxy and be like, okay, so there's forty

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Speaker 1: four billion, two d and eighties six seconds into until

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Speaker 1: her new album released. Like they're insane about it because

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Speaker 1: she puts like numbers. Anytimes she uses emoji, people are like, okay,

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Speaker 1: she used that emoji that has the color red in it.

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Speaker 1: That means red is the new next album and she's

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Speaker 1: releasing it. There were four of those red belief, so

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Speaker 1: that means that it's going to be in four months

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Speaker 1: or in four days or uh yeah, four score and

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Speaker 1: seven years ago. Maybe she's doing a tribute to like

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Speaker 1: people like they go crazy, it's my fashion egg would

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Speaker 1: just be like a happy and sandwich and people go,

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Speaker 1: I think he ate a sandwich, like you'd be like,

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't know. And because Andrew didn't remember the word

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Speaker 1: easter egg and he called it fashion so um, it

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Speaker 1: looks like yeah, I love fashion X because they speak.

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Speaker 1: Because someone last night goes, what's your Instagram story? Like,

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Speaker 1: what is this thing you're doing? And I go, it's

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Speaker 1: for one person, and it's always for one I mean

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Speaker 1: if if my listeners are paying attention and they see

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Speaker 1: what's going on later on when they get all the details,

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Speaker 1: when my song comes out, like Taylor Swift World, all

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Speaker 1: of that world makes sense. You know. That's like it's

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Speaker 1: not like you could figure it out now because it's

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Speaker 1: too cryptic, but later on it will all come together.

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Speaker 1: But I would love this someone as a colla. I

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Speaker 1: was like on their wall for you, like trying to

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Speaker 1: figure out Nikki's brain and you know, like Charlie, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so Nicki's looking back and then Nikki is uh in

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Speaker 1: a green dress today and then Nicky, I'm serious. I

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Speaker 1: want That's what I kind of want because it's fun.

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Speaker 1: I want that as a fan of like, because the

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Speaker 1: thing is I would I tell everything, but there are

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Speaker 1: certain things I can't tell yet, and I'm not holding

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Speaker 1: back to be purposefully like you know, that's who I

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Speaker 1: saw last night. Actual, no, no, no, big big think

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Speaker 1: big Christmas someone Actually he played Mr. Probably in your

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Speaker 1: top tend to see in person? And Rihanna, Rihanna? Whoa dude?

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Speaker 1: Where do you see Rihanna? At the at the Bowery Hotel?

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Speaker 1: This hotel is the dude. If I was a million

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Speaker 1: well whatever, like ten million, I would live in this

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Speaker 1: hotel forever. Like why wouldn't Why wouldn't I why? I mean,

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Speaker 1: I love, That's why I do it in l A.

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Speaker 1: I'm I'm going to front and then just go to

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Speaker 1: l A and living hotels. It's so nice. I know,

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Speaker 1: I keep adding this hotel and I don't even know

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Speaker 1: what the pill is gonna be. So she walked in,

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Speaker 1: she was glowing. She was glowing, and then my buddy

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Speaker 1: was making fun of her. She was walking around with

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Speaker 1: a bodyguard. It was he didn't look like Kevin Costner.

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Speaker 1: He looked like he had like scarred acne that he

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Speaker 1: put in himself, like he was a tough looking man.

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Speaker 1: I need a tough up, my looks. So people know

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Speaker 1: that I've been through acute. Yeah, my liverage bad. So yeah,

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Speaker 1: she walked by. She smelled great. She actually was dressed

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Speaker 1: like Zaltar from Big remember that guy that fortune. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: she had like a big hat and it was hard

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Speaker 1: to see her, but oh man, her green eyes and god, yeah,

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Speaker 1: she's very beautiful. My ex boyfriend one time was producing

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Speaker 1: a show that she was on and she was warming up.

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Speaker 1: She was like singing in this room for this show

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Speaker 1: and she was singing this like love ballad and they

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Speaker 1: had kind of a flirtation early on, and the whole

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Speaker 1: time she's sang as she was warming up, she was

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Speaker 1: staring at him and like he's yeah. He was like

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Speaker 1: Rihanna like was definitely given me. But I was like,

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Speaker 1: that's the hottest thing I like think. I I mean,

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Speaker 1: I I had him telling me that story all the

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Speaker 1: time when we have sex, because it turned me on

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Speaker 1: so much, just like having Rihanna want my boyfriend. Um

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Speaker 1: speaking of boyfriends, UM, we one of my ex is

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's I'm I'm reluctant to even call him

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Speaker 1: an X because one of my loves of my life.

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Speaker 1: He was the love of my life. That was Helen

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Speaker 1: Hunt yesterday and Castaway. I hope you guys got that.

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Speaker 1: Um I yeah, one of the loves of my life

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Speaker 1: is on the show today. We have a special guest.

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Speaker 1: We're bringing him for the news. He's a new special

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Speaker 1: coming out on Showtime July nine. It's called Tall, Dark,

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Speaker 1: and Pleasant, which he is all those things. Please welcome

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Speaker 1: to the show. My first love, the first orgasm I

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Speaker 1: ever had, was given to me by this man. Is

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Speaker 1: that something you want in your credits? I mean I

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Speaker 1: would want it. Gave me my first orgasm, the first

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Speaker 1: guy to go down on No, I don't think you

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Speaker 1: were the first guy to go down on me, but

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Speaker 1: um that's what did it? Uh? Well, please welcome to show.

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Speaker 1: Pete Lee, Ye, I do want that my credits. I

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Speaker 1: absolutely I think that that should be the lead in

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Speaker 1: my bio. Listen, I've been chasing that dragon ever since. Like,

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Speaker 1: what the fun was that? And that is what has

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Speaker 1: fucked up my whole life. Beat It's like you're the

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Speaker 1: first guy to introduced me to heroin or something. I mean,

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Speaker 1: what did you do? What's your move? Pete? I just cared.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, like I really in love. It was love.

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Speaker 1: We were so we were like it was love. I

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Speaker 1: really did, because I think back on like why some

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Speaker 1: sex is good? Why, like when I've never been in

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Speaker 1: love that way until recently, like recently, like felt it

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Speaker 1: back the same way I gave it. But we were

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Speaker 1: so freaking love. We'd only known each other four days.

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Speaker 1: Yeah happened. We were so we had known each other

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Speaker 1: for four days. It was like so passionate, so crazy,

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Speaker 1: and um, I love that. Like you're literally saying you

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Speaker 1: got it bad and then you recently met Usher and

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Speaker 1: danced with him. You manifested Usher. I did. Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: did meet Usher and have a moment with him. Um no,

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Speaker 1: I wait, I don't understand I got it bad when

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Speaker 1: he sings the song, Uh, what does that mean? That

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Speaker 1: in reference to because you had it bad for this

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Speaker 1: guy and then you met Usher? That was my connection.

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Speaker 1: It's early, it's early, and you got it bad too, apparently. Yeah, Hey,

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Speaker 1: thanks for calling in, Pete. You're so sweet to mention

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Speaker 1: the name drop for me, though. I always appreciate when

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Speaker 1: people mentioned celebrities that I've danced with. Um no, I

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Speaker 1: dance with you were on Howard Stern? Yeah right right,

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Speaker 1: I can Yeah, yeah, I see, Yeah, man, you got

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Speaker 1: a good brother. Yeah, you got a good like the

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Speaker 1: other guy. No. Pete and I and the other night

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Speaker 1: saw each other at Ben Gleave's party, and we are Pete,

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Speaker 1: can we talk about Yeah, we can talk about stuff.

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Speaker 1: We're both going through heartbreak, I would say, recent heartbreak

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Speaker 1: and mine. You know. My mom the other day goes,

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Speaker 1: I feel so bad for Pete and I go because

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Speaker 1: of his breakup, and she was like yeah, and I go,

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Speaker 1: feel bad for me. Where's the sympathy for I'm going

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Speaker 1: through a heartbreak too? And she was, well, they were

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Speaker 1: to go there so long? And I go, I don't care,

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Speaker 1: like I go. I was. I was in love for

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Speaker 1: three weeks. And I know that seems like you can't compared,

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Speaker 1: but I honestly I think it could be just the same.

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Speaker 1: The way I felt about you being love with you

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Speaker 1: for four days is I'm the worst pain of my life,

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Speaker 1: the of us breaking up, and I think it is

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Speaker 1: comparable to something longer. I'm maybe I'm being uh, you know,

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Speaker 1: maybe I'm yeah. I mean it's it's kind of like Usher.

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Speaker 1: You know, um pretty well, God this is and this

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Speaker 1: is the thing. Usher was even big back when Pete

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Speaker 1: and I got together. It's like it's been a constant

405
00:21:27,680 --> 00:21:30,920
Speaker 1: problem in a relationship. Yeah, it's you know, but I

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00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:38,760
Speaker 1: made your vagina gusher. I mean that's not wrong. Um,

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Speaker 1: but I do think that why you I do think

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Speaker 1: that why you went through recently is worse than what

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Speaker 1: like what I'm going through. Uh, because like you know,

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Speaker 1: when you're in like a passionate love, that's like like

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Speaker 1: the flame is burning so hot and then the heartbreak happens.

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Speaker 1: That's way different than I mean, Jamie and I, like

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Speaker 1: we we basically have been kind of slowly titration breaking

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Speaker 1: up for the last year, Like we almost broke up

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Speaker 1: before COVID and then we decided to like stick it

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Speaker 1: out for the pandemic and you know, and that was like, honestly,

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Speaker 1: she's a great person. I'm so happy that I was

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Speaker 1: able to get through a pandemic, like like a global

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Speaker 1: pandemic with her. But um, you know, like like when

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Speaker 1: we finally split, it was kind of like okay, so

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Speaker 1: like we're done right, Like it's uh friends, And it was, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: titration what a good word to use, because it is

423
00:22:32,320 --> 00:22:34,520
Speaker 1: like you weaned yourself off. So by the end it

424
00:22:34,600 --> 00:22:37,600
Speaker 1: was already you. Every day you did a little bit

425
00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:40,560
Speaker 1: less and so you weren't going through the withdrawal that

426
00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:45,240
Speaker 1: you would go through if you quit your zoloft. Oh yeah,

427
00:22:45,280 --> 00:22:47,720
Speaker 1: but doing Heroin twice and then never getting it, and

428
00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:51,960
Speaker 1: I mean, you're so right. Thank you for validating that

429
00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:54,919
Speaker 1: my pain is worse than yours. Pete And uh no,

430
00:22:55,240 --> 00:22:58,160
Speaker 1: it's that that is the thing. It's like I did

431
00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:01,000
Speaker 1: a drug. That's what happened with you. I mean, if

432
00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:03,359
Speaker 1: our listeners want to catch up on the story of

433
00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:06,000
Speaker 1: me and Pete Lee, it happened in um April of

434
00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:10,720
Speaker 1: two thousand six, and we met in Kansas City. I

435
00:23:10,760 --> 00:23:13,040
Speaker 1: was doing a guest set, which is just like a

436
00:23:13,080 --> 00:23:15,040
Speaker 1: five minute set on the local show at the Kansas

437
00:23:15,040 --> 00:23:18,840
Speaker 1: City Improv. Pete was in town opening uh feet middle

438
00:23:18,880 --> 00:23:22,439
Speaker 1: acting for UM the Headline or Harland Williams. I was

439
00:23:22,480 --> 00:23:25,399
Speaker 1: just doing a guest set. I went backstage before my

440
00:23:25,480 --> 00:23:28,439
Speaker 1: set just to like be in the green room, and

441
00:23:28,520 --> 00:23:30,359
Speaker 1: I turned a corner and I walked in and I

442
00:23:30,359 --> 00:23:33,760
Speaker 1: saw Pete Lee with a plate. Oh I already seen

443
00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:36,520
Speaker 1: you on stage, I think, yeah, that point I saw

444
00:23:36,520 --> 00:23:38,800
Speaker 1: you on stage. I was having a post set, like

445
00:23:38,840 --> 00:23:43,240
Speaker 1: a post crushing salad. I was like rewarding myself with yeah,

446
00:23:43,280 --> 00:23:46,439
Speaker 1: you had crushed and I was like that guy's wild pete.

447
00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:49,159
Speaker 1: And I saw him. He had a plate up to

448
00:23:49,240 --> 00:23:58,360
Speaker 1: his mouth. Yeah, you're crazy so pleasant. It's like Motley

449
00:23:58,359 --> 00:24:01,240
Speaker 1: Crue stories over here. I had like like a kale

450
00:24:01,320 --> 00:24:05,119
Speaker 1: salad with chicken. No, I don't you have some Paul

451
00:24:05,200 --> 00:24:08,520
Speaker 1: Newman on there? I really did. I went crazy. Sorry,

452
00:24:08,720 --> 00:24:10,320
Speaker 1: he had like a lot of pepper on there. It

453
00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:14,560
Speaker 1: was crazy, like, oh my god, he's a bad boy. Um.

454
00:24:15,520 --> 00:24:21,399
Speaker 1: But I just remember for me it was first no

455
00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:27,040
Speaker 1: on stage. He was the funny thing is well at

456
00:24:27,080 --> 00:24:29,800
Speaker 1: the time though, So he killed and then I'm doing

457
00:24:29,800 --> 00:24:32,119
Speaker 1: the second show, so I go backstage after he's back there,

458
00:24:32,160 --> 00:24:33,480
Speaker 1: and I turned the corner. I walked in the groom.

459
00:24:33,520 --> 00:24:35,679
Speaker 1: I'll never forget the chair you were sitting in everything.

460
00:24:35,840 --> 00:24:37,760
Speaker 1: You were eating a salad and you were like like

461
00:24:37,840 --> 00:24:40,600
Speaker 1: kind of scraping the last part and you just like

462
00:24:40,600 --> 00:24:43,439
Speaker 1: stopped and we were just like hi, And it was

463
00:24:43,520 --> 00:24:45,679
Speaker 1: like I felt love at first sight and it was

464
00:24:45,760 --> 00:24:49,000
Speaker 1: a done deal. And then the second set, you dropped

465
00:24:49,040 --> 00:24:51,280
Speaker 1: during your set that you had a girlfriend. I was like, oh,

466
00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:52,879
Speaker 1: and then you had a joke where you're like, but

467
00:24:52,920 --> 00:24:55,600
Speaker 1: I cheat on her on Wednesdays and it was like

468
00:24:55,640 --> 00:25:00,920
Speaker 1: a Wednesday, and I was like, I like, so you'll

469
00:25:00,920 --> 00:25:03,000
Speaker 1: stay on your diet of a salad, but you'll eat

470
00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:07,399
Speaker 1: pussy eat someone else's joke that I go loud and clear,

471
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:13,159
Speaker 1: pete and clear. I remember I saw you on my Space.

472
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:15,399
Speaker 1: You're one of like the friend of a friend or

473
00:25:15,440 --> 00:25:18,879
Speaker 1: like suggested you're a friend's suggestion on my Space and

474
00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:22,320
Speaker 1: I clicked on your profile like earlier that day and

475
00:25:22,359 --> 00:25:25,080
Speaker 1: I was like, man, she is like she is so cute,

476
00:25:25,160 --> 00:25:26,800
Speaker 1: Like there was just something about you. I was like,

477
00:25:27,040 --> 00:25:28,840
Speaker 1: I was like I need to know her, but then

478
00:25:29,600 --> 00:25:33,879
Speaker 1: I couldn't. You were like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

479
00:25:33,960 --> 00:25:39,679
Speaker 1: that's yeah, yeah, okay, that was my my Space blog

480
00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:42,280
Speaker 1: song too. I was like, I'm in the mood. Oh

481
00:25:42,400 --> 00:25:47,280
Speaker 1: my god, uh like I gotta meet this girl. Yeah.

482
00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:49,440
Speaker 1: Um you just made me laugh so hard that I

483
00:25:50,040 --> 00:25:52,399
Speaker 1: can't even speak right now. This is great, this, this

484
00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:54,520
Speaker 1: feels so good. Um No, but I was like, it

485
00:25:54,640 --> 00:25:58,679
Speaker 1: prevents you from another user mentioned keep trying to make

486
00:25:58,720 --> 00:26:01,800
Speaker 1: you laugh, so that you a breath before you mentioned

487
00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:04,920
Speaker 1: him again. Just take just have the thought of maybe

488
00:26:04,960 --> 00:26:08,000
Speaker 1: I should just have a pause before you bring up

489
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:11,240
Speaker 1: us your reference. No, continue telling me how fantastic ame.

490
00:26:11,359 --> 00:26:13,600
Speaker 1: But I remember I couldn't friend you because you were

491
00:26:13,640 --> 00:26:16,000
Speaker 1: so cute that it would have been creepy, like you

492
00:26:16,000 --> 00:26:18,080
Speaker 1: know what I mean, Like and you had a girlfriend.

493
00:26:18,240 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 1: I had a girlfriend, and I like, I didn't want

494
00:26:20,119 --> 00:26:22,520
Speaker 1: to creep And then you walked into the green room

495
00:26:22,560 --> 00:26:24,760
Speaker 1: and I was just like it was like literally clicked

496
00:26:24,800 --> 00:26:27,199
Speaker 1: hard on me. I clicked hard on you in the

497
00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:29,560
Speaker 1: green room. It was like like you know in movies

498
00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:32,440
Speaker 1: or like in Wayne's world when dream Weaver would come on,

499
00:26:32,640 --> 00:26:35,280
Speaker 1: when he would see that girl, like that was what

500
00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:37,480
Speaker 1: it was like when you walked into the green room,

501
00:26:37,520 --> 00:26:39,520
Speaker 1: and it was like that for me to it was

502
00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:43,159
Speaker 1: crazy you said that on stage. I was just like okay,

503
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:45,800
Speaker 1: and I was not the type of girl to pursue.

504
00:26:46,560 --> 00:26:48,040
Speaker 1: I mean I lost my virginity to a guy with

505
00:26:48,080 --> 00:26:50,320
Speaker 1: a girlfriend. I mean I like guys with girlfriends sometimes

506
00:26:50,359 --> 00:26:53,160
Speaker 1: because I'm like scared of intimacy, and especially if they're

507
00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:56,560
Speaker 1: like I was young and they're throwing their girlfriend under

508
00:26:56,600 --> 00:27:00,080
Speaker 1: the bus on stage, like I'm like, this is a

509
00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:03,280
Speaker 1: dotten deal, Like he's not married, you know, and maybe

510
00:27:03,359 --> 00:27:05,320
Speaker 1: that's scoundrel y of me. But I was just like,

511
00:27:05,480 --> 00:27:07,480
Speaker 1: it's I don't I almost didn't want someone who was

512
00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:12,280
Speaker 1: available to me, and uh and so I uh. We

513
00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:15,120
Speaker 1: hung out that night and then the flirting was on,

514
00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:17,520
Speaker 1: and I think that then it was all weekend. I

515
00:27:17,520 --> 00:27:20,080
Speaker 1: did a guess on every single show, and we fell

516
00:27:20,119 --> 00:27:21,720
Speaker 1: in love, and I think and then we did not

517
00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:23,760
Speaker 1: have sex. I can't believe I didn't have sex with you.

518
00:27:23,800 --> 00:27:26,639
Speaker 1: Sooner we had to say goodbye. On Sunday, you had

519
00:27:26,680 --> 00:27:29,560
Speaker 1: to go to a college in Iowa. This was Kansas,

520
00:27:29,640 --> 00:27:31,800
Speaker 1: and then you're gonna come back to Kansas City to

521
00:27:31,920 --> 00:27:35,800
Speaker 1: fly out. And you went into the show in Iowa.

522
00:27:35,960 --> 00:27:37,600
Speaker 1: And then that night I was like, if you drive

523
00:27:37,600 --> 00:27:40,960
Speaker 1: back tonight instead of tomorrow morning and you come to Lawrence, Kansas,

524
00:27:41,480 --> 00:27:45,119
Speaker 1: I'll I'll fuck you. And all of a sudden, I

525
00:27:45,160 --> 00:27:49,679
Speaker 1: hear like ro was just like he just like jumped

526
00:27:50,040 --> 00:27:52,719
Speaker 1: on he like hit the ride on a semi truck,

527
00:27:53,040 --> 00:27:57,840
Speaker 1: jumped on the back. So it's fun. This salad is

528
00:27:57,880 --> 00:28:00,520
Speaker 1: post so college salad. You know what The funny thing

529
00:28:00,560 --> 00:28:03,240
Speaker 1: about that was. I remember I rented a pet cruiser

530
00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:05,399
Speaker 1: and I remember actually like the noise, it was like

531
00:28:06,960 --> 00:28:10,639
Speaker 1: cruiser Pete. Cruiser was like real loud, like they were

532
00:28:10,680 --> 00:28:13,639
Speaker 1: supposed to be some awesome like old school car, and

533
00:28:13,680 --> 00:28:16,800
Speaker 1: I remember actually flooring it and going to corned up,

534
00:28:16,880 --> 00:28:19,000
Speaker 1: headed to Lawrence, and then you arrived in the middle

535
00:28:19,000 --> 00:28:20,240
Speaker 1: of the night. I remember at a paper do the

536
00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:22,359
Speaker 1: next day, so I was like finishing this paper I

537
00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:24,440
Speaker 1: had to write. I finished it, and then I ran

538
00:28:24,440 --> 00:28:27,480
Speaker 1: out to meet you. It was in the rain the rain,

539
00:28:28,520 --> 00:28:30,119
Speaker 1: were like making out in the rain, and then you

540
00:28:30,160 --> 00:28:33,199
Speaker 1: come inside and then we had sex, and then I

541
00:28:33,240 --> 00:28:35,560
Speaker 1: had my first orgasm where it was like what the

542
00:28:35,800 --> 00:28:38,080
Speaker 1: funk was that? And then was like we were just

543
00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:41,080
Speaker 1: like so in love. And then I was like, okay,

544
00:28:41,240 --> 00:28:44,280
Speaker 1: well you're going back to New York and you're gonna

545
00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:46,120
Speaker 1: break up with your girlfriend. That most of the plan, right,

546
00:28:46,480 --> 00:28:52,360
Speaker 1: that was the That was the plan. That that was well,

547
00:28:52,600 --> 00:28:56,680
Speaker 1: the plan got a little derailed because it brought back

548
00:28:56,880 --> 00:29:05,720
Speaker 1: came after I came. He's like, you know, um, she cruised. Yeah.

549
00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:09,240
Speaker 1: It really was one of those bachelor's situations where I

550
00:29:09,320 --> 00:29:11,480
Speaker 1: felt like I was in love with two women at

551
00:29:11,520 --> 00:29:14,960
Speaker 1: the same time, and like I was like I knew

552
00:29:15,000 --> 00:29:17,920
Speaker 1: you were. I was honestly crazy in love with you. Um.

553
00:29:18,400 --> 00:29:20,880
Speaker 1: I was in love with her. There were some red flags.

554
00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:28,600
Speaker 1: I wound up doing exactly the right decision and marrying her. Dude,

555
00:29:29,240 --> 00:29:31,800
Speaker 1: you called me, I said, don't talk to me unless

556
00:29:32,080 --> 00:29:34,680
Speaker 1: you are free. Like we said goodbye, and I go no,

557
00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:36,280
Speaker 1: because we were talking at first, and it was just

558
00:29:36,320 --> 00:29:38,720
Speaker 1: like what's going on here? Like you sent me letters

559
00:29:38,920 --> 00:29:40,920
Speaker 1: you said I love you, and like I still have

560
00:29:41,040 --> 00:29:42,560
Speaker 1: some of those cards you sent me, and I was like,

561
00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:44,400
Speaker 1: I can't talk to this guy anymore. He's never gonna

562
00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:46,080
Speaker 1: break up with her. I have to like pull out,

563
00:29:46,440 --> 00:29:49,160
Speaker 1: and so I go, no more, tell me, let me

564
00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:50,640
Speaker 1: know when you're single. And then you called me a

565
00:29:50,680 --> 00:29:52,800
Speaker 1: month later. It was hell to not reach out to you.

566
00:29:53,040 --> 00:29:55,240
Speaker 1: A month later, you called me on my birthday and

567
00:29:55,280 --> 00:29:57,960
Speaker 1: I was like, Pete. I was like, you're single, and

568
00:29:57,960 --> 00:30:00,400
Speaker 1: you're like, no, I just it's your birth day and

569
00:30:00,440 --> 00:30:02,040
Speaker 1: I just wanted to say happy birthday and you were

570
00:30:02,120 --> 00:30:03,680
Speaker 1: I was on TV the night before for the first

571
00:30:03,680 --> 00:30:06,040
Speaker 1: time in my life, and you were like you were

572
00:30:06,080 --> 00:30:08,640
Speaker 1: amazing last night, and I was like and and You're

573
00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:12,440
Speaker 1: like and I can't. I'm sorry, Nicky, I just can't.

574
00:30:12,440 --> 00:30:15,920
Speaker 1: And I was just like, never ever talk to me again.

575
00:30:16,320 --> 00:30:18,160
Speaker 1: I never want to hear from you then and you go,

576
00:30:18,280 --> 00:30:20,840
Speaker 1: NICKI you're saying really hurtful things right now. And I go, yeah,

577
00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:23,320
Speaker 1: I think, he goes, you're angry, so you're saying hurtful things,

578
00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:26,360
Speaker 1: and I go, I am so mad I ever met you,

579
00:30:26,600 --> 00:30:28,360
Speaker 1: And I was like, and then we hung up, and

580
00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:30,320
Speaker 1: then I didn't talk to you for like eleven years.

581
00:30:30,680 --> 00:30:35,280
Speaker 1: You know, you know what's crazy is that? But what's

582
00:30:35,280 --> 00:30:38,000
Speaker 1: crazy the um? There was a bench in Central Park

583
00:30:38,040 --> 00:30:40,120
Speaker 1: that I was sitting on, and uh, I was sitting

584
00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:42,240
Speaker 1: on a bench to the last time that I too

585
00:30:42,440 --> 00:30:44,480
Speaker 1: went to New York, like a week ago. I actually

586
00:30:44,600 --> 00:30:47,840
Speaker 1: ran past that bench and the bench literally like invoked

587
00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:52,560
Speaker 1: like heartbreak emotions in me. I'm like, what was that

588
00:30:52,680 --> 00:30:54,680
Speaker 1: like for you when you made that decision? Like did

589
00:30:54,680 --> 00:30:57,560
Speaker 1: it make you more committed to the one that you chose?

590
00:30:57,840 --> 00:31:00,720
Speaker 1: Like and this is not don't don't sugarcoat it, like

591
00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:05,560
Speaker 1: did you how long before you? Like we're not thinking

592
00:31:05,600 --> 00:31:08,880
Speaker 1: about me a lot? Um? I don't think I ever

593
00:31:09,240 --> 00:31:12,000
Speaker 1: not thought about you, but like, like I mean honestly,

594
00:31:13,520 --> 00:31:16,600
Speaker 1: because I was staying in the game. I think maybe

595
00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:18,600
Speaker 1: you know, as an open micro when you met me

596
00:31:18,640 --> 00:31:20,920
Speaker 1: and then suddenly I was like, I was starting to

597
00:31:20,920 --> 00:31:23,320
Speaker 1: show it up and haunted you, and I was honestly

598
00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:26,200
Speaker 1: motivated by haunting you in your marriage. When I found

599
00:31:26,200 --> 00:31:28,360
Speaker 1: out you guys got married, I was like, I cannot believe.

600
00:31:29,400 --> 00:31:31,200
Speaker 1: But I didn't know that she found out about me,

601
00:31:31,280 --> 00:31:33,200
Speaker 1: and I thought, Okay, as long as they have worked

602
00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:36,520
Speaker 1: through the dishonesty that happened, then I'm I that I'm

603
00:31:36,520 --> 00:31:38,680
Speaker 1: happy for, Like there's a part of me that was like,

604
00:31:38,760 --> 00:31:41,160
Speaker 1: at least he was honest with her and she found out. Yeah,

605
00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:43,200
Speaker 1: that was her pitch, and like when we went to

606
00:31:43,240 --> 00:31:45,000
Speaker 1: dinner that night, that was her pitch. She was like, look,

607
00:31:45,040 --> 00:31:47,120
Speaker 1: I know something's going on with you and Nicky Glazer.

608
00:31:47,160 --> 00:31:49,320
Speaker 1: I don't want to know the exact details, but you

609
00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:52,280
Speaker 1: need to choose. And I remember thinking that was this

610
00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:54,760
Speaker 1: is kind of cool. She seems really cool right now.

611
00:31:55,160 --> 00:31:58,120
Speaker 1: I think I'm gonna choose her, and um and so

612
00:31:58,240 --> 00:32:00,760
Speaker 1: I problem. So I chose her that yeah, And then

613
00:32:00,880 --> 00:32:03,240
Speaker 1: she was like, but you can't, like you can't keep

614
00:32:03,240 --> 00:32:06,360
Speaker 1: a friendship with her, which was like in to her

615
00:32:06,560 --> 00:32:09,800
Speaker 1: like in hindsight, like that that's reasonable, but oh yeah,

616
00:32:09,840 --> 00:32:11,840
Speaker 1: I mean like it wasn't even on the table for you.

617
00:32:11,880 --> 00:32:15,200
Speaker 1: To be honest, it wasn't even yeah, it wasn't until now. Yeah,

618
00:32:15,200 --> 00:32:17,400
Speaker 1: well you wouldn't have a Netflix special if he never

619
00:32:17,560 --> 00:32:21,840
Speaker 1: ate you out so well, So I'm so grateful that

620
00:32:21,880 --> 00:32:23,520
Speaker 1: it happened because we saw each other the other night.

621
00:32:23,520 --> 00:32:25,680
Speaker 1: We're gonna get we saw each other at ben Gleabs

622
00:32:25,680 --> 00:32:28,080
Speaker 1: the other night and it was and You're right, I

623
00:32:28,120 --> 00:32:30,960
Speaker 1: wouldn't have a Netflix special. It started my obsession with

624
00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:34,320
Speaker 1: like orgasming and like how to recreate that in my

625
00:32:34,360 --> 00:32:36,600
Speaker 1: own life. Um, and I think you probably did suck

626
00:32:36,640 --> 00:32:39,720
Speaker 1: my clip and that was like the crux. What did

627
00:32:39,880 --> 00:32:41,680
Speaker 1: I think? That's what you did? Right to have been?

628
00:32:41,680 --> 00:32:43,160
Speaker 1: I didn't even know what you did, but no one

629
00:32:43,240 --> 00:32:46,080
Speaker 1: didn't ever again I uh yeah, I mean I like

630
00:32:46,560 --> 00:32:50,440
Speaker 1: I've fantasized about that moment like in my life before.

631
00:32:50,480 --> 00:32:55,040
Speaker 1: It was so hot. It was so hot because Ben's

632
00:32:55,080 --> 00:32:57,200
Speaker 1: it was so sweet. Wait, what were we gonna say? Well,

633
00:32:57,240 --> 00:32:58,880
Speaker 1: because you were talking about like, did I ever think

634
00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:00,760
Speaker 1: about you? Yeah? I thought about you because I had

635
00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:03,719
Speaker 1: to ride the subway with my ex wife while that

636
00:33:03,800 --> 00:33:08,040
Speaker 1: was skinned in your face for Nicki and Sarah literally

637
00:33:08,080 --> 00:33:10,280
Speaker 1: like we were sitting like going to a party and

638
00:33:11,680 --> 00:33:13,479
Speaker 1: she just like elbowed me and she's like, I know

639
00:33:13,640 --> 00:33:16,800
Speaker 1: this is really awkward and awful for you and really yeah,

640
00:33:16,800 --> 00:33:18,640
Speaker 1: and I was like, I was like, yeah, it's it's

641
00:33:18,720 --> 00:33:20,840
Speaker 1: kind of hard, and like I would go down. I

642
00:33:20,840 --> 00:33:23,000
Speaker 1: would take the train to Best Week Ever, like every

643
00:33:23,000 --> 00:33:25,000
Speaker 1: single day to go to work, and then you would

644
00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:27,200
Speaker 1: be the train car would be skinned with your face

645
00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:29,320
Speaker 1: so like so much. And then I saw you at

646
00:33:29,360 --> 00:33:32,800
Speaker 1: Best Week Ever. High Pete. Remember High Pete. It was

647
00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:34,280
Speaker 1: the first time I ever spoke to you. We were

648
00:33:34,280 --> 00:33:36,000
Speaker 1: in the same We're getting her makeup done. He was

649
00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:37,560
Speaker 1: getting makeup done for Best Week Ever. I was for

650
00:33:37,640 --> 00:33:40,200
Speaker 1: nicking Sarah's a sketch. Were shooting in the office because

651
00:33:40,200 --> 00:33:42,400
Speaker 1: our office is shot where they shot Best Week Ever.

652
00:33:42,560 --> 00:33:44,640
Speaker 1: And we had to be in the same makeup room.

653
00:33:44,680 --> 00:33:47,000
Speaker 1: And I'm like, I cannot believe I'm in the fucking

654
00:33:47,040 --> 00:33:50,840
Speaker 1: makeup room with Peatelee. Nine years after, eight years after

655
00:33:50,920 --> 00:33:53,080
Speaker 1: I said I'm never speaking to again, and um, I

656
00:33:53,120 --> 00:33:56,160
Speaker 1: loved you so much and and I just you walked

657
00:33:56,160 --> 00:33:58,040
Speaker 1: out of the room and I just go high Pete

658
00:33:58,400 --> 00:34:00,280
Speaker 1: and no, no, I walked out of the room. And

659
00:34:00,320 --> 00:34:03,840
Speaker 1: then you said that your makeup artist was like who

660
00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:07,920
Speaker 1: like had to shake off the vibes that were in

661
00:34:07,960 --> 00:34:10,440
Speaker 1: the room that I was shooting at you. Yeah, it

662
00:34:10,560 --> 00:34:14,440
Speaker 1: was like it was like intense, like the makeup artist

663
00:34:14,520 --> 00:34:16,920
Speaker 1: was like that was thick, like like just like like

664
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:19,840
Speaker 1: I was just in in like a movie like it

665
00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:23,520
Speaker 1: was like like love and hated like all this stuff.

666
00:34:24,480 --> 00:34:31,399
Speaker 1: So it really these are his confessions. Okay, we gotta

667
00:34:31,400 --> 00:34:33,719
Speaker 1: get to the news and uh, sorry for taking song

668
00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:35,279
Speaker 1: to get there. But this is a special day because

669
00:34:35,280 --> 00:34:38,880
Speaker 1: we have Petelee. His Showtime special Tall, Dark and Pleasant

670
00:34:39,040 --> 00:34:42,439
Speaker 1: He's so freaking funny, is coming out on Showtime July nine,

671
00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:44,880
Speaker 1: So make sure you check that out and follow petely

672
00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:53,360
Speaker 1: at Pete Lee, Pete Lee, Petelee on Instagram. You oh boy,

673
00:34:53,560 --> 00:34:55,400
Speaker 1: hope you're having a great time out there having all

674
00:34:55,480 --> 00:34:58,000
Speaker 1: this well, I know me Pete and Nikki and no

675
00:34:58,160 --> 00:35:03,640
Speaker 1: are are no jerk Pete? Uh no jerk? Okay, oh

676
00:35:03,640 --> 00:35:06,759
Speaker 1: I see what you're doing there. No drunkie Lee, No

677
00:35:06,880 --> 00:35:15,719
Speaker 1: drunk No drunk Pete. How would how would it good? Yeah?

678
00:35:16,640 --> 00:35:19,600
Speaker 1: Just keep going. Are you guys speaking? We can find

679
00:35:19,640 --> 00:35:22,200
Speaker 1: all of our name. It's a new Usher album that

680
00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:28,800
Speaker 1: we're trying to remember. He's doing some experimental stuff. Okay.

681
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:34,439
Speaker 1: A fan combined our names no drunk and then horrible job.

682
00:35:35,320 --> 00:35:39,000
Speaker 1: And by the way, is this behind you? Are you

683
00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:41,440
Speaker 1: in a hotel, Andrew? Or is this your bedroom? Like?

684
00:35:41,520 --> 00:35:44,720
Speaker 1: Do you have like a fashionable, old style, old timey

685
00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:49,479
Speaker 1: lamp in your bedroom? He is definitely at the Bowery Hotel. Okay, yeah,

686
00:35:49,920 --> 00:35:52,279
Speaker 1: in my room, I don't even have a light. He

687
00:35:52,280 --> 00:35:54,319
Speaker 1: has a lamp at the corner of the room that

688
00:35:54,400 --> 00:35:56,720
Speaker 1: has no shade on it, that is surrounded by piles

689
00:35:56,719 --> 00:36:00,480
Speaker 1: of dirty sheets. Here in the four corners of shade,

690
00:36:02,120 --> 00:36:08,520
Speaker 1: I give you an I don't need anymore. Four quarters

691
00:36:08,560 --> 00:36:11,600
Speaker 1: of Andrew's bedroom have different piles of laundry and things

692
00:36:11,760 --> 00:36:15,080
Speaker 1: and and uh yeah, so the the it's ironic that

693
00:36:15,120 --> 00:36:17,279
Speaker 1: you point out a lamp that is definitely definitely not

694
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:22,640
Speaker 1: Andrew's um. Okay, okay. A woman who thought she had

695
00:36:22,680 --> 00:36:25,520
Speaker 1: twenty dollars in her bank account finds that she has

696
00:36:25,640 --> 00:36:29,400
Speaker 1: one billion dollars has been deposited in her bank account.

697
00:36:29,640 --> 00:36:31,759
Speaker 1: She was spooked by it, and no one from Chase

698
00:36:31,880 --> 00:36:34,560
Speaker 1: is returning her calls to return it. I mean, what

699
00:36:34,560 --> 00:36:36,839
Speaker 1: would you do? Would you call? I wouldn't call the bank.

700
00:36:37,400 --> 00:36:40,440
Speaker 1: I would I would. I would take as much money

701
00:36:40,560 --> 00:36:44,879
Speaker 1: until going, oh, you know that, because they're gonna owe

702
00:36:44,880 --> 00:36:46,880
Speaker 1: it back. It's not yours. They're going to catch the

703
00:36:46,880 --> 00:36:49,640
Speaker 1: glitch and then you're gonna owe it back. I don't

704
00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:51,880
Speaker 1: see why you would do that. That's I would think

705
00:36:51,920 --> 00:36:53,680
Speaker 1: that would be the foolish thing to do. Pete, what

706
00:36:53,719 --> 00:36:56,279
Speaker 1: would you do? I would take as much of it

707
00:36:56,320 --> 00:36:59,520
Speaker 1: out and then I'd flee the country, just like Andrew said,

708
00:36:59,760 --> 00:37:03,240
Speaker 1: But like you gotta also understand, like like JP Morgan

709
00:37:03,320 --> 00:37:06,400
Speaker 1: Chase was the people that funded the Nazis, so like

710
00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:09,080
Speaker 1: they're gonna find you, Like they're going to find you

711
00:37:09,200 --> 00:37:11,120
Speaker 1: somewhere on the globe. So I would have as much

712
00:37:11,239 --> 00:37:16,400
Speaker 1: fun as I could, uh, until they billion dollars. I

713
00:37:16,440 --> 00:37:20,760
Speaker 1: would buy the and Frank freaking Museum and then hide

714
00:37:20,880 --> 00:37:27,200
Speaker 1: hide out and they would never find me. Yeah. Hard

715
00:37:27,280 --> 00:37:29,480
Speaker 1: to take out nine million dollars. I don't know how

716
00:37:29,520 --> 00:37:31,160
Speaker 1: you would take that out in cash. I guess I

717
00:37:31,200 --> 00:37:34,000
Speaker 1: would take out like four million and not get crazy

718
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:37,160
Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh my god, someone putting nine million

719
00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:40,440
Speaker 1: dollars in here believe that it felt like they can't

720
00:37:40,440 --> 00:37:42,799
Speaker 1: pull up and see that four billion had been taken

721
00:37:42,840 --> 00:37:46,200
Speaker 1: out at some point they see transactions. Look, that's a

722
00:37:46,360 --> 00:37:54,680
Speaker 1: finder's fee. We finding. I love how poor she was.

723
00:37:54,760 --> 00:37:56,440
Speaker 1: That's like the saddest part of the story. I know

724
00:37:56,560 --> 00:38:01,760
Speaker 1: that is so vulnerable. I wouldn't admit that. I wouldn't

725
00:38:01,800 --> 00:38:06,319
Speaker 1: tell anyone that part. Um, No, that's I want I

726
00:38:06,320 --> 00:38:07,960
Speaker 1: want this girl to I want to start a go

727
00:38:08,040 --> 00:38:10,400
Speaker 1: fund me so we can give her a couple of bucks.

728
00:38:10,920 --> 00:38:14,600
Speaker 1: For the honest person. When homeless people return money and

729
00:38:14,640 --> 00:38:17,520
Speaker 1: they get more, people like put in more money because

730
00:38:17,560 --> 00:38:19,560
Speaker 1: they did the right thing. I feel like we should

731
00:38:19,560 --> 00:38:24,279
Speaker 1: do that for her. But what's her venmo? I think

732
00:38:24,280 --> 00:38:26,840
Speaker 1: she's too old to even have them though she's an

733
00:38:26,880 --> 00:38:29,759
Speaker 1: older lady. What a sweetie. Um, I don't even know

734
00:38:29,800 --> 00:38:31,560
Speaker 1: when me zero is a billionaires. I think I would

735
00:38:31,600 --> 00:38:34,000
Speaker 1: be confused by the amount of zeros. Oh yeah, she's

736
00:38:34,040 --> 00:38:37,480
Speaker 1: an older lady. Oh my god, she thought she had

737
00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:39,719
Speaker 1: twenty dollars. What does that woman spend? Why does she

738
00:38:39,760 --> 00:38:42,840
Speaker 1: only have twenty dollars? Which she's from Florida. She just

739
00:38:42,880 --> 00:38:45,320
Speaker 1: thought she had twenty dollars in a bank account. Wow.

740
00:38:47,080 --> 00:38:49,719
Speaker 1: I always like, I always see like an old rich

741
00:38:49,800 --> 00:38:52,759
Speaker 1: woman like that and think she, you know, has at

742
00:38:52,840 --> 00:38:56,040
Speaker 1: least you know five thousand, you know what I mean?

743
00:38:56,120 --> 00:38:58,040
Speaker 1: She had nice ear and she had lipstick. That lady

744
00:38:58,040 --> 00:39:01,120
Speaker 1: had twenty dollars like she like what is she doing?

745
00:39:01,320 --> 00:39:05,799
Speaker 1: Like I don't know. I mean it's wild up. Will

746
00:39:05,840 --> 00:39:08,160
Speaker 1: you pull up the picture of her again? Because, uh,

747
00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:12,400
Speaker 1: I've met this woman. I haven't met this woman before,

748
00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:14,800
Speaker 1: but I've met this woman before. And that lady Fox

749
00:39:15,160 --> 00:39:18,239
Speaker 1: like she he's the kind of lady that comes up

750
00:39:18,280 --> 00:39:20,920
Speaker 1: to you after the show and she's like stroking my

751
00:39:21,160 --> 00:39:24,880
Speaker 1: like my forearm for a little too long. Yeah, you're

752
00:39:24,960 --> 00:39:28,240
Speaker 1: just wonderful. Do you want to come? She's an older woman,

753
00:39:28,360 --> 00:39:34,200
Speaker 1: probably in her sixties, blonde hair, blue nails, crazy like

754
00:39:34,239 --> 00:39:37,960
Speaker 1: big bobble earrings like Leslie stallwars on sixty minutes, um

755
00:39:38,840 --> 00:39:40,760
Speaker 1: at Pete. I know what you're saying. Do you get

756
00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:43,480
Speaker 1: a lot of women touching you after shows and like

757
00:39:43,840 --> 00:39:46,680
Speaker 1: make you make you feel uncomfortable? Because we always get

758
00:39:46,719 --> 00:39:48,840
Speaker 1: the stories have it happening to women? But do you

759
00:39:48,920 --> 00:39:52,160
Speaker 1: get that? Yeah? And it is uncomfortable I mean for

760
00:39:52,239 --> 00:39:55,400
Speaker 1: me for a couple of reasons, like um uh, like

761
00:39:55,520 --> 00:39:58,160
Speaker 1: number one, A lot of times, like back when I

762
00:39:58,200 --> 00:40:00,839
Speaker 1: was in my relationship, like she would be there and

763
00:40:00,880 --> 00:40:03,280
Speaker 1: she'd be like standing sort of near the merge table.

764
00:40:03,400 --> 00:40:05,400
Speaker 1: And then women would be like grabbing my ass or

765
00:40:05,440 --> 00:40:07,480
Speaker 1: like they'd grab my dick or like whatever in a

766
00:40:07,520 --> 00:40:10,440
Speaker 1: picture like ha ha, we're a bachelor up party, We're

767
00:40:10,440 --> 00:40:12,319
Speaker 1: gonna grab the comedians dick and I'll be like, no,

768
00:40:12,440 --> 00:40:16,400
Speaker 1: you can't. And then they like women's egos can't handle

769
00:40:16,440 --> 00:40:19,200
Speaker 1: when a guy doesn't want his dick grab, Like immediately

770
00:40:19,360 --> 00:40:21,719
Speaker 1: it goes to like what are you gay? Like right

771
00:40:21,960 --> 00:40:24,120
Speaker 1: right away they could be like the most woke and

772
00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:26,520
Speaker 1: evolve hipster girls, and then when you don't want your

773
00:40:26,560 --> 00:40:31,720
Speaker 1: dick grab they're like whatever, yeah, it's it's it's weird.

774
00:40:31,960 --> 00:40:34,400
Speaker 1: I've found that, like when you want to have sex

775
00:40:34,440 --> 00:40:36,480
Speaker 1: with a guy and he's like no, you go what

776
00:40:37,480 --> 00:40:40,200
Speaker 1: you have to like, like, if if I'm willing, you

777
00:40:40,400 --> 00:40:43,560
Speaker 1: must be And of course I'm saying that, uh facetiously,

778
00:40:43,680 --> 00:40:46,640
Speaker 1: but you there is a thing of like, but men

779
00:40:46,680 --> 00:40:49,920
Speaker 1: always want to funk. They always wanna have everything be sexualized.

780
00:40:50,000 --> 00:40:54,200
Speaker 1: You don't. The rejection is so crazy, and get the

781
00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:57,399
Speaker 1: fuck off men. Women don't touch men. Men don't touch

782
00:40:57,400 --> 00:41:00,440
Speaker 1: other men. Remember when I yelled at some guy for

783
00:41:00,520 --> 00:41:03,920
Speaker 1: like man handling you was that you Pete. I yelled

784
00:41:03,960 --> 00:41:07,239
Speaker 1: at that guy, like this guy just you could tell

785
00:41:07,440 --> 00:41:09,759
Speaker 1: wanted to touch someone. He hasn't been touched in a while.

786
00:41:09,760 --> 00:41:11,880
Speaker 1: I was going through a divorce, and he like I

787
00:41:12,040 --> 00:41:15,080
Speaker 1: was using the fact that he could hug Pete and

788
00:41:15,120 --> 00:41:17,480
Speaker 1: like really get in there to just get He might

789
00:41:17,480 --> 00:41:19,880
Speaker 1: be a little by who even knows, you know, he

790
00:41:20,080 --> 00:41:22,560
Speaker 1: just wanted to touch Pete. And it was like uncomfortable.

791
00:41:22,560 --> 00:41:24,560
Speaker 1: It was too long, and I go, don't touch him.

792
00:41:24,600 --> 00:41:26,640
Speaker 1: I go get off. What are you doing? Like if

793
00:41:26,680 --> 00:41:28,799
Speaker 1: this guy would have done this to a girl and

794
00:41:28,840 --> 00:41:30,680
Speaker 1: it wasn't even sexual, you know, it's just a really

795
00:41:30,680 --> 00:41:33,360
Speaker 1: intense hug from behind while we're eating dinner, and I

796
00:41:33,400 --> 00:41:35,719
Speaker 1: just go get off of him. That's too long And

797
00:41:35,760 --> 00:41:37,640
Speaker 1: it was uncomfortable, and I regret doing it because you

798
00:41:37,640 --> 00:41:39,040
Speaker 1: can stand up for yourself. But I was just like,

799
00:41:39,360 --> 00:41:41,440
Speaker 1: I don't want to see this any kind of Just

800
00:41:41,520 --> 00:41:44,160
Speaker 1: get off people unless they're asking for you to touch them,

801
00:41:44,200 --> 00:41:45,960
Speaker 1: Get the funk off them. Get the funk off. I

802
00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:48,400
Speaker 1: was in Madison, Wisconsin a few weeks ago, and it

803
00:41:48,480 --> 00:41:50,000
Speaker 1: was like the first meet and greet that I had

804
00:41:50,040 --> 00:41:52,479
Speaker 1: done in COVID. Like I'm vaccinated most of the people

805
00:41:52,480 --> 00:41:54,759
Speaker 1: in the club are vaccinated. And this lady was there

806
00:41:54,760 --> 00:41:56,560
Speaker 1: in the front row with her husband and like the

807
00:41:56,600 --> 00:41:58,879
Speaker 1: whole time, she's like taking pictures of me, and like

808
00:41:59,160 --> 00:42:00,959
Speaker 1: I could tell that she was like a super fan,

809
00:42:01,400 --> 00:42:04,520
Speaker 1: and um, like she it's great, we need those right.

810
00:42:04,800 --> 00:42:07,160
Speaker 1: But after the show, she was just like all over me.

811
00:42:07,200 --> 00:42:10,240
Speaker 1: At my merch table, there's a line of people. Shouldn't

812
00:42:10,239 --> 00:42:12,239
Speaker 1: have done the joke about cheating on a Saturday night.

813
00:42:12,239 --> 00:42:15,760
Speaker 1: On a Saturday night, it was the specific day. Oh yeah,

814
00:42:15,880 --> 00:42:20,239
Speaker 1: that's why. Um. But anyway, like her husband is just

815
00:42:20,280 --> 00:42:22,799
Speaker 1: like the most tolerant human being on the planet. You

816
00:42:22,800 --> 00:42:26,400
Speaker 1: can tell that. Like this guy, like he meditates or something.

817
00:42:26,440 --> 00:42:29,040
Speaker 1: But because he was just like she does this, I'm

818
00:42:29,080 --> 00:42:31,520
Speaker 1: gonna just breathe. I'm not gonna get mad It's her

819
00:42:31,560 --> 00:42:34,680
Speaker 1: hall pass. I made it agreed when I married her

820
00:42:34,719 --> 00:42:36,920
Speaker 1: that if she ever got to meet Petelee, she would

821
00:42:36,920 --> 00:42:39,560
Speaker 1: shoot her shot. This is what it is. And mine's

822
00:42:39,640 --> 00:42:42,359
Speaker 1: Kathy Ireland, and I really picked wrong because I don't

823
00:42:42,360 --> 00:42:45,360
Speaker 1: know where to find her. She's not coming to Madison

824
00:42:45,400 --> 00:42:48,759
Speaker 1: anytime soon. She must be near the calendar factory who

825
00:42:48,760 --> 00:42:56,839
Speaker 1: makes calendars out early nine calendar factories they're coming bad.

826
00:42:57,000 --> 00:42:59,000
Speaker 1: But I just tried to like tend to the husband

827
00:42:59,040 --> 00:43:00,719
Speaker 1: as much as I could. I was like like she

828
00:43:00,760 --> 00:43:07,520
Speaker 1: would be like literally glommed on me. Yeah, I just

829
00:43:07,600 --> 00:43:09,759
Speaker 1: stuck in that clip. I was stuck in that cli.

830
00:43:09,880 --> 00:43:12,720
Speaker 1: I was literally just mouthing. I'm like, dude, I'm so sorry,

831
00:43:12,760 --> 00:43:15,279
Speaker 1: and he's like, he's like, it's okay, it's okay. It's

832
00:43:15,320 --> 00:43:17,120
Speaker 1: so funny. Yeah, you have to play kate the guy

833
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:19,719
Speaker 1: that you're making uncomfortable. But that's you know, I say

834
00:43:19,760 --> 00:43:21,640
Speaker 1: that happens a lot when meet and greets. I'll have

835
00:43:21,719 --> 00:43:23,960
Speaker 1: a guy like casually grab my ass in a way

836
00:43:23,960 --> 00:43:26,200
Speaker 1: that's like, oh, I just hit it accedentally, which my

837
00:43:26,360 --> 00:43:28,560
Speaker 1: butt is not big enough that you accidentally hit it.

838
00:43:28,600 --> 00:43:30,759
Speaker 1: You have to like go in to get it. Yeah,

839
00:43:31,760 --> 00:43:36,200
Speaker 1: it's getting cave and he uh, but there's always a

840
00:43:36,200 --> 00:43:38,359
Speaker 1: wife there and people go, why don't you tell him?

841
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:40,000
Speaker 1: And it's like, because it'll be a whole thing with

842
00:43:40,040 --> 00:43:42,239
Speaker 1: the wife, like it's too he'll deny it. It's like

843
00:43:42,280 --> 00:43:44,399
Speaker 1: it's too much of a hassle that I'm taking care

844
00:43:44,400 --> 00:43:46,480
Speaker 1: of her needs. And it's just like but I will

845
00:43:46,480 --> 00:43:49,160
Speaker 1: say if I had a boyfriend and I was watching

846
00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:51,240
Speaker 1: him do a meet and greet and there were women

847
00:43:51,280 --> 00:43:54,680
Speaker 1: that were trying to like obviously wanted to fuck him.

848
00:43:54,719 --> 00:43:56,600
Speaker 1: I mean that's I would be so into that. I

849
00:43:56,600 --> 00:43:59,080
Speaker 1: would not be a jealous girlfriend. I'd be like, like,

850
00:43:59,760 --> 00:44:02,879
Speaker 1: not a strike, ladies, he's coming back to my room

851
00:44:03,040 --> 00:44:06,319
Speaker 1: and or you know, he's coming back with me, and

852
00:44:06,560 --> 00:44:09,800
Speaker 1: he's gonna eat all the salad. It's gonna toss my salad.

853
00:44:10,560 --> 00:44:15,320
Speaker 1: Later on tonight post show, salad is changed into my asshole.

854
00:44:15,560 --> 00:44:18,160
Speaker 1: Do you think we still use hidden valley though? Do

855
00:44:18,200 --> 00:44:20,480
Speaker 1: you think you know that's the new thing? Is an

856
00:44:20,560 --> 00:44:23,239
Speaker 1: upside down pineapple means you're a swinger. Have you heard

857
00:44:23,239 --> 00:44:26,640
Speaker 1: about this? People are shopping. If you go to like

858
00:44:26,680 --> 00:44:29,359
Speaker 1: Trader Joe's and someone has an upside down pineapple, they're

859
00:44:29,360 --> 00:44:32,080
Speaker 1: gonna want to basket like a couple swap yeah in

860
00:44:32,120 --> 00:44:36,040
Speaker 1: their basket. Yeah that's okay. What if you just like

861
00:44:36,080 --> 00:44:38,280
Speaker 1: are a person that just throws things in your basket

862
00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:42,279
Speaker 1: and like, all of a sudden, you have to someone's husband. Yeah, no,

863
00:44:42,400 --> 00:44:45,480
Speaker 1: I'm just like not good with I don't yet, I'm

864
00:44:45,520 --> 00:44:48,000
Speaker 1: dyslexic with fruit. Now, if you gotta throw your keys

865
00:44:48,000 --> 00:44:50,719
Speaker 1: in a bowl, that's what you gotta do? What's the

866
00:44:50,719 --> 00:44:55,000
Speaker 1: next story? Andrew? Did that husband like you when you

867
00:44:55,040 --> 00:44:56,960
Speaker 1: were hugging his wife? Or no? How did that end?

868
00:44:57,080 --> 00:44:59,319
Speaker 1: He was cool? It was cool to me, but I

869
00:44:59,640 --> 00:45:01,600
Speaker 1: like I they were probably like at least like six

870
00:45:01,640 --> 00:45:04,880
Speaker 1: touch points where I was like just being like, sorry, dude,

871
00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:08,160
Speaker 1: well this is sorry. This is Petelee. People please are

872
00:45:08,239 --> 00:45:10,480
Speaker 1: taking care of other people, like worrying about the husband

873
00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:13,080
Speaker 1: that you have nothing to do with. It's not your

874
00:45:13,200 --> 00:45:15,440
Speaker 1: job to make him feel safe. It's her job. And

875
00:45:15,520 --> 00:45:18,040
Speaker 1: she failed. But that's that's classic Beetlee, which we'll get

876
00:45:18,040 --> 00:45:20,960
Speaker 1: into later when we talked to him about his special tall,

877
00:45:21,040 --> 00:45:24,840
Speaker 1: dark and pleasant all right next headline. A Norwegian public

878
00:45:24,880 --> 00:45:28,440
Speaker 1: broadcaster released a guide of different positions for all couples,

879
00:45:28,480 --> 00:45:31,319
Speaker 1: with black and white photos and interesting names like the

880
00:45:31,400 --> 00:45:35,920
Speaker 1: clamping Koala, defarts dumping a k a too speed dump

881
00:45:36,120 --> 00:45:41,600
Speaker 1: and the standing mouthful. Let's take a look at more. Okay,

882
00:45:41,800 --> 00:45:46,520
Speaker 1: so these are the these are new positions apparently apparently,

883
00:45:47,120 --> 00:45:49,080
Speaker 1: um I like the flamingo. It's a girl on a

884
00:45:49,160 --> 00:45:51,080
Speaker 1: stool that you could do that on stage, so it's

885
00:45:51,080 --> 00:45:54,920
Speaker 1: like a stand up stool and then one person is

886
00:45:54,960 --> 00:45:57,520
Speaker 1: standing next to you. And then you that the girl

887
00:45:57,520 --> 00:45:59,840
Speaker 1: on the stool literally looks like my best friend Katherine,

888
00:46:00,080 --> 00:46:02,799
Speaker 1: like like my best friend of Katherine, and that looks

889
00:46:02,840 --> 00:46:08,080
Speaker 1: like me next to her. Um, that one's great. That

890
00:46:08,120 --> 00:46:11,800
Speaker 1: one's great. Okay, it's a man, that's us. They're both standing.

891
00:46:11,840 --> 00:46:15,040
Speaker 1: The woman's uh, she's standing on one leg, the guys

892
00:46:15,080 --> 00:46:18,280
Speaker 1: on both. She's putting her other leg over his shoulder

893
00:46:18,320 --> 00:46:20,359
Speaker 1: as she's standing, so she's almost doing like a split thing.

894
00:46:20,480 --> 00:46:22,200
Speaker 1: That is hot. I love that. And you know what

895
00:46:22,239 --> 00:46:23,759
Speaker 1: I like about that. She's not doing a lot of

896
00:46:23,800 --> 00:46:25,920
Speaker 1: work there. She's bendy, but she's not having to like

897
00:46:26,040 --> 00:46:28,440
Speaker 1: support herself. He's carrying her. And I like to do.

898
00:46:29,120 --> 00:46:31,680
Speaker 1: You're shorter in that instance as a man, because that

899
00:46:31,760 --> 00:46:33,760
Speaker 1: leg is goes all the way up on the shoulder.

900
00:46:33,880 --> 00:46:35,840
Speaker 1: I don't know if I could funk that way. I

901
00:46:35,880 --> 00:46:38,239
Speaker 1: know you you have to be long, long legged, you

902
00:46:38,360 --> 00:46:40,120
Speaker 1: have to be tall for that to happen. That's a

903
00:46:40,120 --> 00:46:42,200
Speaker 1: good one for me, to be honest with you. I've

904
00:46:42,200 --> 00:46:44,640
Speaker 1: never even thought of that. What's the next one. It

905
00:46:44,680 --> 00:46:48,040
Speaker 1: looks like you and Pete a little bit there. That

906
00:46:48,120 --> 00:46:50,520
Speaker 1: was literally where we did that night. That's why we

907
00:46:50,560 --> 00:46:54,560
Speaker 1: couldn't stop thinking about each other. Keep moving down. I'm like, okay,

908
00:46:54,880 --> 00:46:59,200
Speaker 1: I hate Frosty Frostin. The girl looks like she's squatting

909
00:46:59,200 --> 00:47:01,520
Speaker 1: taking a dump. They're on a bed and the guy

910
00:47:01,640 --> 00:47:04,960
Speaker 1: is behind her a kneeling and he just looks like

911
00:47:05,000 --> 00:47:07,640
Speaker 1: he's supporting her as she's taking a dump, like from behind,

912
00:47:07,719 --> 00:47:09,480
Speaker 1: like being like you can do it, babe, I know

913
00:47:09,520 --> 00:47:11,560
Speaker 1: it's hard to shit in the woods. Like she can't

914
00:47:11,600 --> 00:47:14,320
Speaker 1: not laugh at this, like a yeah, they're laughing in

915
00:47:14,360 --> 00:47:19,960
Speaker 1: the photo to this is these two just look like

916
00:47:20,000 --> 00:47:23,640
Speaker 1: they're mourning the loss of a dog they just buried

917
00:47:23,719 --> 00:47:26,840
Speaker 1: or something. This is like frost skin is like ikea

918
00:47:26,920 --> 00:47:31,520
Speaker 1: language for homosexual like like froscan, Oh god, he's such

919
00:47:31,560 --> 00:47:35,319
Speaker 1: a froskin. Yeah yeah, what does frostkin say? Oh it's

920
00:47:35,360 --> 00:47:39,439
Speaker 1: the frog. Frost skin is the frog. So yeah, these

921
00:47:39,440 --> 00:47:42,759
Speaker 1: are all erotic and like actually, like the funny thing

922
00:47:42,800 --> 00:47:45,120
Speaker 1: is you don't even think about some of these. There's

923
00:47:45,360 --> 00:47:47,680
Speaker 1: so many ways two bodies can fit together, and it's

924
00:47:47,719 --> 00:47:49,359
Speaker 1: like haven't we come up with all of them? How

925
00:47:49,360 --> 00:47:53,200
Speaker 1: are their new ones? Um? All? Right? Next story? Do

926
00:47:53,239 --> 00:47:55,680
Speaker 1: you guys like to do all sorts of different positions

927
00:47:55,719 --> 00:47:57,520
Speaker 1: like that? Or you like do you kind of have

928
00:47:57,600 --> 00:48:01,560
Speaker 1: like four go two's four go. Yeah, And to be honest,

929
00:48:01,719 --> 00:48:04,160
Speaker 1: I've been doing more. I've been doing more lately. I

930
00:48:04,200 --> 00:48:07,560
Speaker 1: didn't realize I had it in me. Really, you know

931
00:48:07,640 --> 00:48:11,120
Speaker 1: some things, you know, Yeah, what was your favorite position?

932
00:48:11,120 --> 00:48:13,080
Speaker 1: I don't know. You like the missionary? You like laying

933
00:48:13,120 --> 00:48:20,120
Speaker 1: there and then right, oh yeah, well that's pretty much Pete.

934
00:48:20,120 --> 00:48:23,840
Speaker 1: What's yours? What what is your repertoire? This is so boring,

935
00:48:23,880 --> 00:48:26,960
Speaker 1: but like, I like missionary because you really get to connect. Like,

936
00:48:27,080 --> 00:48:30,360
Speaker 1: I agree, I like it. It's the best for sex

937
00:48:30,400 --> 00:48:33,080
Speaker 1: where you're making love because it's like you. Whenever a

938
00:48:33,080 --> 00:48:35,919
Speaker 1: guy is like somewhere else or like behind me or something,

939
00:48:35,960 --> 00:48:37,960
Speaker 1: I'm like, but I want to see your face, Like

940
00:48:38,040 --> 00:48:40,680
Speaker 1: I need to kiss what I'm coming, I like need

941
00:48:40,719 --> 00:48:43,200
Speaker 1: to kiss, like I cannot if they're like somewhere else,

942
00:48:43,239 --> 00:48:45,880
Speaker 1: I'm just like, come back up. Like it's like I

943
00:48:45,920 --> 00:48:50,960
Speaker 1: want like emotional support. Yeah, so I agree with you.

944
00:48:51,840 --> 00:48:54,160
Speaker 1: That's just a little intense, though, don't you think when

945
00:48:54,160 --> 00:48:56,520
Speaker 1: you're looking at each other in the eyes and you're like, yeah,

946
00:48:56,520 --> 00:48:59,200
Speaker 1: it's called love and you've gotta go for it. I

947
00:48:59,560 --> 00:49:02,800
Speaker 1: know it's it is too intense. It's crazy. It sounds

948
00:49:02,840 --> 00:49:04,680
Speaker 1: like you haven't felt it yet, and I'm kind of

949
00:49:04,680 --> 00:49:07,560
Speaker 1: sad for you. But you'll get there, buddy, You'll get there.

950
00:49:08,120 --> 00:49:12,920
Speaker 1: Next story, Why do I care? Why do I care?

951
00:49:13,000 --> 00:49:16,480
Speaker 1: All right? Why do you care? Nick Avril Levine joined

952
00:49:16,600 --> 00:49:19,680
Speaker 1: forces with Tony Hawk as she makes her TikTok debut

953
00:49:20,239 --> 00:49:23,319
Speaker 1: with a silly skater boy bit. You got sent this

954
00:49:23,400 --> 00:49:26,480
Speaker 1: picture because it looks like your dad? Yeah, my dady,

955
00:49:26,640 --> 00:49:28,839
Speaker 1: This really does look like my dad. Tony Hawk and

956
00:49:28,960 --> 00:49:32,040
Speaker 1: um Avril Levine. I showed it to my mom and

957
00:49:32,080 --> 00:49:33,640
Speaker 1: she was like, whoa, that does look like your dad.

958
00:49:33,880 --> 00:49:37,399
Speaker 1: That's crazy? Whoa good job knows? She decide by side?

959
00:49:37,400 --> 00:49:39,880
Speaker 1: Will you please put this on our Instagram? The side

960
00:49:39,880 --> 00:49:44,080
Speaker 1: by side? That's wild. They do look like, uh yeah,

961
00:49:44,200 --> 00:49:47,400
Speaker 1: Antony looks the tall guy. I didn't watch the Skater Boy.

962
00:49:47,520 --> 00:49:49,640
Speaker 1: I didn't watch the TikTok. I saw it everywhere yesterday.

963
00:49:49,719 --> 00:49:52,080
Speaker 1: It's so funny when you just are like, I can't

964
00:49:52,120 --> 00:49:54,520
Speaker 1: be bothered to watch this thirty second thing. I hate

965
00:49:54,520 --> 00:49:57,200
Speaker 1: TikTok because you can't scroll ahead? Is that? Does anyone

966
00:49:57,200 --> 00:49:59,759
Speaker 1: else get bothered by that? Like? They're too long? Even

967
00:49:59,760 --> 00:50:03,200
Speaker 1: though are fucking thirty seconds long? Yeah, I I did

968
00:50:03,239 --> 00:50:07,800
Speaker 1: watch the TikTok and uh, it's literally painful because she dropped.

969
00:50:07,840 --> 00:50:10,360
Speaker 1: He has this like lime green mini ramp and she

970
00:50:10,520 --> 00:50:13,239
Speaker 1: drops in on it, but she's not wearing kneepads and

971
00:50:13,280 --> 00:50:16,400
Speaker 1: she just like slams right onto her knees where like

972
00:50:16,680 --> 00:50:18,960
Speaker 1: it's like she broke a bone. And then she like

973
00:50:19,040 --> 00:50:21,960
Speaker 1: gets stop laughing because she's at Tony hawks house and

974
00:50:22,000 --> 00:50:24,279
Speaker 1: she's got all sorts of adrenaline that she's getting this

975
00:50:24,440 --> 00:50:27,960
Speaker 1: TikTok shot and then she drops in again. She makes

976
00:50:28,000 --> 00:50:30,279
Speaker 1: it and then almost falls again just as hard. But

977
00:50:30,360 --> 00:50:33,120
Speaker 1: like the whole time, I can't take joy in the

978
00:50:33,120 --> 00:50:35,920
Speaker 1: fact that Tony Hawk and every leavin her together because

979
00:50:35,960 --> 00:50:40,359
Speaker 1: her leg is broken, like she's she's she died leg

980
00:50:40,440 --> 00:50:43,920
Speaker 1: first that day and I can't even handle it because

981
00:50:43,960 --> 00:50:47,759
Speaker 1: you are like a you were a skater, Yeah, boy,

982
00:50:47,840 --> 00:50:50,200
Speaker 1: I was. I was a skater. Boy I said see

983
00:50:50,200 --> 00:50:55,800
Speaker 1: you later. Boy I didn't in April two six, Um,

984
00:50:55,920 --> 00:50:58,040
Speaker 1: yeah you someone the other night was like, oh, Jeff

985
00:50:58,120 --> 00:51:00,399
Speaker 1: Dye was talking about you the other night and being

986
00:51:00,440 --> 00:51:04,120
Speaker 1: like he turns out he's like an Olympic like water

987
00:51:04,360 --> 00:51:07,640
Speaker 1: sports dude. Like this guy he could kill you with

988
00:51:07,680 --> 00:51:11,080
Speaker 1: his thumb. You're like a jiu jitsu like you're like

989
00:51:11,760 --> 00:51:15,399
Speaker 1: tell us your accomplishments belt in taekwondo. And then I kicked.

990
00:51:15,520 --> 00:51:18,720
Speaker 1: I was a champion kickboxer. I'm a national champion water skier.

991
00:51:19,320 --> 00:51:22,239
Speaker 1: I have two world records, one in the most people

992
00:51:22,239 --> 00:51:24,360
Speaker 1: on the water for a pyramid, the other one for

993
00:51:24,600 --> 00:51:28,360
Speaker 1: world record bombs which is barefooting. Um I was I

994
00:51:28,440 --> 00:51:31,120
Speaker 1: really think only one of those is your record? Yeah,

995
00:51:31,400 --> 00:51:34,440
Speaker 1: the first one. It seems like you're part of a group.

996
00:51:34,520 --> 00:51:37,480
Speaker 1: I was a big, pretty large group. It was. It

997
00:51:37,520 --> 00:51:43,319
Speaker 1: was an ensemble. That's a lot to toe. Come on,

998
00:51:43,520 --> 00:51:46,000
Speaker 1: I had to do this with my wrist. It was crazy. Wait,

999
00:51:46,000 --> 00:51:49,120
Speaker 1: how many pyramid were you? You were a base? I

1000
00:51:49,239 --> 00:51:53,080
Speaker 1: was bramid there there were fifty two people on the

1001
00:51:53,080 --> 00:51:55,840
Speaker 1: water for it, so like fifty two people behind one boat,

1002
00:51:56,480 --> 00:51:58,719
Speaker 1: and I was one of the bases of it. And

1003
00:51:59,080 --> 00:52:02,279
Speaker 1: uh yeah. And then bomb outs are where you jump

1004
00:52:02,280 --> 00:52:04,600
Speaker 1: out of two skis and you go barefooting. And the

1005
00:52:04,719 --> 00:52:07,080
Speaker 1: previous world record was two behind one boat. Then we

1006
00:52:07,120 --> 00:52:09,600
Speaker 1: set the world record for four, then we set it

1007
00:52:09,680 --> 00:52:12,719
Speaker 1: for eight, and then we did sixteen. So uh and

1008
00:52:12,800 --> 00:52:14,719
Speaker 1: like my friend Tony Richeles, I don't know if I

1009
00:52:14,719 --> 00:52:17,319
Speaker 1: should say his name, but he literally got paralyzed and

1010
00:52:17,360 --> 00:52:20,520
Speaker 1: lost his football scholarship because this thing was so dangerous

1011
00:52:20,800 --> 00:52:23,960
Speaker 1: because of bombing out. Because of bombing out. Yeah, because

1012
00:52:25,320 --> 00:52:31,200
Speaker 1: Andrew was a record for bombing out. You know it

1013
00:52:30,800 --> 00:52:35,320
Speaker 1: was Look, it was only fifteen times. Wait wait it

1014
00:52:35,440 --> 00:52:44,959
Speaker 1: was the Yeah, a joke that I could make only

1015
00:52:44,960 --> 00:52:49,320
Speaker 1: because Andrew does not bomb. Andrew kills. That's yeah, that's like,

1016
00:52:48,760 --> 00:52:51,000
Speaker 1: uh like if somebody's got like a really cute nose,

1017
00:52:51,040 --> 00:52:53,359
Speaker 1: you can be like you have a funked up nose. Wait,

1018
00:52:53,360 --> 00:52:56,960
Speaker 1: so these guy's not really paralyzed then, no, this dude

1019
00:52:57,040 --> 00:53:00,400
Speaker 1: was the student was paralyzed because you know, I because

1020
00:53:00,600 --> 00:53:03,400
Speaker 1: if you barefoot in like you fall, you're falling at

1021
00:53:03,440 --> 00:53:06,279
Speaker 1: fifty and the water is like concrete. So if you

1022
00:53:06,320 --> 00:53:08,800
Speaker 1: face plant and your legs go back, you just break

1023
00:53:08,840 --> 00:53:10,680
Speaker 1: your spine. Why is the water like concrete? What are

1024
00:53:10,719 --> 00:53:16,640
Speaker 1: you talking about? Because you're going fast? Okay, yeah, all right,

1025
00:53:17,280 --> 00:53:20,759
Speaker 1: Jesus Christ. And then why aren't you why why are

1026
00:53:20,880 --> 00:53:23,680
Speaker 1: you a comedian? Yeah? Why am I a comedian? Why

1027
00:53:23,719 --> 00:53:25,480
Speaker 1: are you're good at like all these things? Like you

1028
00:53:25,560 --> 00:53:29,719
Speaker 1: just like took make money. That's a good point. Yeah,

1029
00:53:29,760 --> 00:53:31,799
Speaker 1: And I also like, I mean, you know me well

1030
00:53:31,920 --> 00:53:34,600
Speaker 1: enough to know that, Like, I really don't have anxiety

1031
00:53:34,600 --> 00:53:38,719
Speaker 1: about physical danger, but I do having have social anxiety.

1032
00:53:38,840 --> 00:53:42,799
Speaker 1: And I'm on zolof just like Andrew clap yeah, um,

1033
00:53:42,880 --> 00:53:46,160
Speaker 1: high five, I have social anxiety. And so stand up

1034
00:53:46,239 --> 00:53:48,480
Speaker 1: scared the ship out of me, like all those physical

1035
00:53:48,560 --> 00:53:51,240
Speaker 1: sports stuff like it. Didn't you like things that scare

1036
00:53:51,280 --> 00:53:54,520
Speaker 1: you and give you adrenaline rush when you do them? Yeah,

1037
00:53:54,640 --> 00:53:57,800
Speaker 1: And that's you have more of adrenaline rush doing comedy.

1038
00:53:57,840 --> 00:54:01,279
Speaker 1: I agree. We gotta get to today's segment. On Wednesday Show,

1039
00:54:01,400 --> 00:54:04,920
Speaker 1: We're doing a special one with Pete Lee. We chose

1040
00:54:04,920 --> 00:54:07,640
Speaker 1: a segment called the Blankest Thing, and that is where

1041
00:54:07,680 --> 00:54:10,360
Speaker 1: we do We pick a word and we have to

1042
00:54:10,400 --> 00:54:13,000
Speaker 1: share a story of the blankest thing we've ever done,

1043
00:54:13,080 --> 00:54:16,480
Speaker 1: or ever seen or whatever. And today's uh an honor

1044
00:54:16,480 --> 00:54:20,399
Speaker 1: of Pete Lee. Today's blankest thing, what is the what's

1045
00:54:20,400 --> 00:54:22,560
Speaker 1: the film in the blank Noah? In honor of Pete.

1046
00:54:22,760 --> 00:54:26,919
Speaker 1: In honor of Pete, the most people pleasing thing I've

1047
00:54:26,960 --> 00:54:32,520
Speaker 1: ever done, the people pleasingest thing You've ever done, Because Pete,

1048
00:54:32,760 --> 00:54:35,040
Speaker 1: that's I mean, that's a big part of who you

1049
00:54:35,080 --> 00:54:37,960
Speaker 1: are is pleasing people, it's like yeah, I mean, I

1050
00:54:38,200 --> 00:54:41,319
Speaker 1: it's my my weakness in life. It's what I do.

1051
00:54:41,360 --> 00:54:44,640
Speaker 1: I mean I could. I'm gonna make a little list

1052
00:54:44,719 --> 00:54:46,359
Speaker 1: and then I'm gonna get to one that I think

1053
00:54:46,440 --> 00:54:49,840
Speaker 1: is really great. Uh. Every handshaking COVID, Like you know

1054
00:54:49,840 --> 00:54:52,440
Speaker 1: when like somebody comes up in there, obviously a Republican

1055
00:54:52,640 --> 00:54:55,799
Speaker 1: and they were like shakemire, I'm still shaking hands like yeah,

1056
00:54:55,880 --> 00:54:57,759
Speaker 1: and their nose is hanging out their masks and all

1057
00:54:57,760 --> 00:54:59,680
Speaker 1: that ship yea yeah, every single one of those. Um,

1058
00:54:59,760 --> 00:55:03,440
Speaker 1: if I want, if I start an Instagram story series,

1059
00:55:03,719 --> 00:55:05,759
Speaker 1: like I start and it's going, like I have to

1060
00:55:05,800 --> 00:55:07,799
Speaker 1: watch the whole thing, Like I remember one time, you're

1061
00:55:07,840 --> 00:55:10,520
Speaker 1: scared that they might think you're bored with them. Yeah,

1062
00:55:10,760 --> 00:55:14,279
Speaker 1: or just like I know that the algorithm would would

1063
00:55:14,280 --> 00:55:16,800
Speaker 1: be like okay, maybe, like I know it helps their algorithm.

1064
00:55:16,840 --> 00:55:19,680
Speaker 1: Want to make the algorithm mad. I literally want to

1065
00:55:19,680 --> 00:55:22,360
Speaker 1: people please the Instagram algorithm. That just seems like O

1066
00:55:22,480 --> 00:55:25,040
Speaker 1: c D is more than people pleasing. I understand watching

1067
00:55:25,040 --> 00:55:26,640
Speaker 1: some story because you don't want them to see you

1068
00:55:26,760 --> 00:55:29,000
Speaker 1: drop off and think that you're mad at them because

1069
00:55:29,040 --> 00:55:32,040
Speaker 1: their story wasn't good. I sometimes need to let people

1070
00:55:32,040 --> 00:55:34,399
Speaker 1: know like you do not deserve me that you need

1071
00:55:34,440 --> 00:55:37,040
Speaker 1: to know that this is where you lost me. Yeah,

1072
00:55:37,120 --> 00:55:40,000
Speaker 1: and like do better. That's what Like Literally, you're the

1073
00:55:40,560 --> 00:55:43,080
Speaker 1: that's honest. You're like the photo negative of how I

1074
00:55:43,080 --> 00:55:44,680
Speaker 1: feel about it. You'll be like, yeah, I'll watch your

1075
00:55:44,680 --> 00:55:47,080
Speaker 1: guy's story and just fall off after one, and I'm like, oh,

1076
00:55:47,200 --> 00:55:49,480
Speaker 1: I can't do that, Like, no, you need to send

1077
00:55:49,520 --> 00:55:51,759
Speaker 1: a message. I'm not. Sometimes they do that manipulatively to

1078
00:55:51,800 --> 00:55:53,960
Speaker 1: be like I don't care about you boy, I like

1079
00:55:54,080 --> 00:55:56,640
Speaker 1: and think about too much. But if someone's stories suck,

1080
00:55:56,920 --> 00:55:59,640
Speaker 1: I will fall off with no problem because that happens

1081
00:55:59,640 --> 00:56:01,439
Speaker 1: to me with my friends, and I go, okay, that's

1082
00:56:01,440 --> 00:56:04,319
Speaker 1: where I wasn't you got don't go that far, you know,

1083
00:56:04,360 --> 00:56:06,960
Speaker 1: like you gotta you get information when people are honest

1084
00:56:07,040 --> 00:56:10,560
Speaker 1: with you, and um yeah, it's It's one of my

1085
00:56:10,840 --> 00:56:15,000
Speaker 1: least favorite things about myself and others is the people

1086
00:56:15,000 --> 00:56:17,600
Speaker 1: pleasing And is it something that you're you're trying to

1087
00:56:17,640 --> 00:56:20,439
Speaker 1: stop or do you is it something that you can't

1088
00:56:20,680 --> 00:56:23,239
Speaker 1: It's something that I try to stop and I I

1089
00:56:23,360 --> 00:56:26,359
Speaker 1: actively on a daily basis have to go no, like

1090
00:56:26,440 --> 00:56:30,440
Speaker 1: I uh like I pete, don't do that or um

1091
00:56:30,520 --> 00:56:32,839
Speaker 1: I have to decide that in the moment when I'm

1092
00:56:32,880 --> 00:56:35,600
Speaker 1: agreeing to something that like, I'm agreeing to do this

1093
00:56:35,640 --> 00:56:37,840
Speaker 1: because I want to do it, not because I'm people

1094
00:56:37,840 --> 00:56:41,799
Speaker 1: pleasing um. Like like an example of it today would be,

1095
00:56:42,239 --> 00:56:43,799
Speaker 1: you know, last night, No, it was like, hey, we're

1096
00:56:43,800 --> 00:56:46,360
Speaker 1: gonna podcast at eight twenty am, and my brain was like,

1097
00:56:46,440 --> 00:56:49,280
Speaker 1: fucking I don't want to wake up really early in podcast,

1098
00:56:49,320 --> 00:56:50,680
Speaker 1: like it's morning radio. And then I was like, no,

1099
00:56:51,200 --> 00:56:54,440
Speaker 1: this is great. I'm gonna get to connect with you guys. Uh,

1100
00:56:54,600 --> 00:56:56,600
Speaker 1: like this is for me, like we're gonna be able

1101
00:56:56,600 --> 00:56:58,319
Speaker 1: to plug. I'm so sorry I was late, and then

1102
00:56:58,360 --> 00:57:00,560
Speaker 1: you just woke up and sat around and really sorry Pete,

1103
00:57:00,600 --> 00:57:02,799
Speaker 1: But I honestly I went to I have this neighbor Jack,

1104
00:57:03,239 --> 00:57:06,040
Speaker 1: He's this old pro surfer that lives right behind me,

1105
00:57:06,080 --> 00:57:07,760
Speaker 1: and we went to the point and had coffee together.

1106
00:57:07,800 --> 00:57:11,040
Speaker 1: It was like awesome, So like it wasn't It wasn't

1107
00:57:11,080 --> 00:57:14,120
Speaker 1: bad at all and people pleasing. Are you being honest

1108
00:57:14,160 --> 00:57:15,919
Speaker 1: with me that it wasn't annoying that I was late,

1109
00:57:16,000 --> 00:57:17,960
Speaker 1: because I can take it. There was a second where

1110
00:57:17,960 --> 00:57:19,840
Speaker 1: I was like, mother fucker, I woke up at seven

1111
00:57:19,920 --> 00:57:21,919
Speaker 1: thirty and then I went and had coffee with Jack

1112
00:57:21,960 --> 00:57:25,160
Speaker 1: and it was fine, Like but that's but like, what's

1113
00:57:25,200 --> 00:57:28,360
Speaker 1: the truth there? Like is the truth that like like

1114
00:57:28,400 --> 00:57:30,480
Speaker 1: I was super put out and the worst thing in

1115
00:57:30,520 --> 00:57:33,520
Speaker 1: the world is to wake up at seven thirty, you know,

1116
00:57:33,680 --> 00:57:36,600
Speaker 1: like and or is the truth? Like I woke up

1117
00:57:36,600 --> 00:57:39,800
Speaker 1: a little early. Um, you guys were running behind. I

1118
00:57:39,840 --> 00:57:41,960
Speaker 1: got to go have coffee with Jack and like now

1119
00:57:42,000 --> 00:57:45,240
Speaker 1: we're having fun and everything's great. So it's like I've

1120
00:57:45,240 --> 00:57:47,560
Speaker 1: been reading this book called How to Do the Work,

1121
00:57:47,800 --> 00:57:50,720
Speaker 1: and um, one of the things in there is like,

1122
00:57:50,720 --> 00:57:53,600
Speaker 1: like with people pleasing, there's like an there's like an

1123
00:57:53,600 --> 00:57:56,360
Speaker 1: ego statement where you can be like, I'm the victim.

1124
00:57:56,400 --> 00:57:59,320
Speaker 1: This is really bad, like the whole world is against me,

1125
00:57:59,360 --> 00:58:02,240
Speaker 1: and that's why I'm doing this, or you can think

1126
00:58:02,280 --> 00:58:06,640
Speaker 1: about what you're doing for yourself in that moment, like

1127
00:58:06,720 --> 00:58:09,080
Speaker 1: why saying yes to that is a good thing? And

1128
00:58:09,080 --> 00:58:11,160
Speaker 1: then yea, why this will why you're doing it? I

1129
00:58:11,200 --> 00:58:12,880
Speaker 1: do that all the time. The other day I was

1130
00:58:12,920 --> 00:58:14,919
Speaker 1: doing a thing that I was like, why the fund

1131
00:58:14,960 --> 00:58:16,640
Speaker 1: did I agree this? My day is so long. I'm

1132
00:58:16,640 --> 00:58:18,760
Speaker 1: not making money from this. This project isn't going to

1133
00:58:18,840 --> 00:58:20,960
Speaker 1: be something that I even want to be like necessarily

1134
00:58:21,000 --> 00:58:22,640
Speaker 1: be on I was doing. I don't I don't know

1135
00:58:22,680 --> 00:58:25,080
Speaker 1: how I got sucked at like I was just when

1136
00:58:25,120 --> 00:58:26,680
Speaker 1: he I got asked, I was in like a state

1137
00:58:26,720 --> 00:58:28,760
Speaker 1: of like yes or something, and then it got to

1138
00:58:28,800 --> 00:58:31,120
Speaker 1: it and I go, I'm doing it because I'm helping

1139
00:58:31,120 --> 00:58:33,200
Speaker 1: out a friend. I'm doing something that is beneath me

1140
00:58:33,240 --> 00:58:34,760
Speaker 1: I don't have time for. But I'm doing it because

1141
00:58:34,840 --> 00:58:36,400
Speaker 1: I want to be of service to a friend that

1142
00:58:36,840 --> 00:58:40,000
Speaker 1: needs If I support him on this thing, it might

1143
00:58:40,520 --> 00:58:44,440
Speaker 1: better his life. Because he asked me, it was just like, Oh,

1144
00:58:44,440 --> 00:58:46,760
Speaker 1: I'm doing this to get outside to do something for

1145
00:58:46,800 --> 00:58:48,960
Speaker 1: someone else that is nothing. I'm not doing it for

1146
00:58:49,000 --> 00:58:51,000
Speaker 1: me for someone else, And it was like, Okay, Suddenly

1147
00:58:51,000 --> 00:58:54,080
Speaker 1: this thing that I resent is like a good deed

1148
00:58:54,840 --> 00:58:56,760
Speaker 1: um and I can live with it a little bit

1149
00:58:56,760 --> 00:59:00,360
Speaker 1: easier resent it least. Are you talking about Ben's party

1150
00:59:00,560 --> 00:59:04,720
Speaker 1: that you hosted Ben's party? Know that? That also was

1151
00:59:04,760 --> 00:59:06,400
Speaker 1: like I was mad because I was like, I didn't

1152
00:59:06,400 --> 00:59:07,800
Speaker 1: even have to go to this party that early. I

1153
00:59:07,800 --> 00:59:09,400
Speaker 1: thought I was co hosting. That just meant I was

1154
00:59:09,400 --> 00:59:10,920
Speaker 1: paying for it and I didn't need to be there.

1155
00:59:11,040 --> 00:59:12,120
Speaker 1: I was paying for a lot of it so I

1156
00:59:12,160 --> 00:59:13,960
Speaker 1: could just showed it up whenever. But then I go

1157
00:59:14,320 --> 00:59:16,720
Speaker 1: because I got there early, I got to talk to

1158
00:59:16,800 --> 00:59:18,920
Speaker 1: Jeremiah Watkins, I got to start to James Domi, and

1159
00:59:18,960 --> 00:59:21,360
Speaker 1: I got like, all these things happened, and I just

1160
00:59:21,520 --> 00:59:25,320
Speaker 1: accepted it. Um, but people bleasing I gotta be honest.

1161
00:59:25,360 --> 00:59:28,760
Speaker 1: It's one of the most least attractive qualities in friends

1162
00:59:29,040 --> 00:59:31,880
Speaker 1: and uh, potential partners when I see it happening, because

1163
00:59:32,640 --> 00:59:35,680
Speaker 1: especially with boyfriends, because you get comfortable enough in a

1164
00:59:35,720 --> 00:59:38,560
Speaker 1: relationship sometimes that your boyfriend will not care about people

1165
00:59:38,560 --> 00:59:40,560
Speaker 1: pleasing you anymore. Like that's how they got you. And

1166
00:59:40,600 --> 00:59:42,160
Speaker 1: you're like, oh my god, I love this. And then

1167
00:59:42,160 --> 00:59:44,120
Speaker 1: they get comfortable enough that they just do it to

1168
00:59:44,280 --> 00:59:46,080
Speaker 1: everyone else. They take care of everyone else in a

1169
00:59:46,080 --> 00:59:50,120
Speaker 1: way that's like, is she is this the valet your girlfriend? Like,

1170
00:59:50,160 --> 00:59:51,640
Speaker 1: why do you have to take care of his needs?

1171
00:59:51,640 --> 00:59:53,280
Speaker 1: I'm mad at you right now, but you're being nice

1172
00:59:53,280 --> 00:59:55,440
Speaker 1: to the valet in a way that's like the you know,

1173
00:59:56,040 --> 00:59:58,720
Speaker 1: or the waiter. It's like, and that's I started to

1174
00:59:58,760 --> 01:00:00,800
Speaker 1: resent it because I go, it isn't even sincere when

1175
01:00:00,840 --> 01:00:03,040
Speaker 1: it was happening to me, because this person does it everywhere,

1176
01:00:03,920 --> 01:00:07,640
Speaker 1: and and it's Honestly, it means you have low self

1177
01:00:07,720 --> 01:00:10,240
Speaker 1: esteem because why you're doing it is not because you

1178
01:00:10,240 --> 01:00:11,680
Speaker 1: want to put good out in the world and make

1179
01:00:11,680 --> 01:00:14,040
Speaker 1: everyone happy. Maybe it's a little bit you want them

1180
01:00:14,080 --> 01:00:17,880
Speaker 1: to think well of you, you want them to like you,

1181
01:00:18,000 --> 01:00:20,160
Speaker 1: because you don't have enough self esteem. So you need

1182
01:00:20,200 --> 01:00:22,520
Speaker 1: to get your esteem from the fact that other people

1183
01:00:22,560 --> 01:00:24,479
Speaker 1: like you. And if you had self esteem, it doesn't

1184
01:00:24,480 --> 01:00:26,600
Speaker 1: mean you go through life and you don't do anything

1185
01:00:26,640 --> 01:00:29,880
Speaker 1: for anyone else. You do esteemable acts for people to

1186
01:00:29,960 --> 01:00:31,920
Speaker 1: be a good person, put good out in the planet,

1187
01:00:32,160 --> 01:00:34,360
Speaker 1: but you don't. It's not motivated by I hope they

1188
01:00:34,400 --> 01:00:37,880
Speaker 1: like me. Yeah, yeah, I mean you're right, And I'm

1189
01:00:37,960 --> 01:00:41,320
Speaker 1: actively trying to work on that, like it literally every day.

1190
01:00:41,360 --> 01:00:43,840
Speaker 1: And it sucks because there there are so many times

1191
01:00:43,840 --> 01:00:47,440
Speaker 1: where just the game slows down for me on a

1192
01:00:47,520 --> 01:00:50,000
Speaker 1: daily basis, where it would be quick for other people,

1193
01:00:50,000 --> 01:00:51,320
Speaker 1: where they would just go, no, I don't want to

1194
01:00:51,360 --> 01:00:52,440
Speaker 1: do that, and I'm not going to do that, and

1195
01:00:52,480 --> 01:00:54,919
Speaker 1: I have to like take a breath and think about

1196
01:00:54,960 --> 01:00:57,000
Speaker 1: what I want to do and then give the answer

1197
01:00:57,120 --> 01:01:03,040
Speaker 1: and then do an usher job. Yeah and now, yeah,

1198
01:01:03,320 --> 01:01:05,920
Speaker 1: we're not going to There's a book called The courage

1199
01:01:05,960 --> 01:01:08,640
Speaker 1: to be disliked that I think you might like because

1200
01:01:08,640 --> 01:01:11,600
Speaker 1: it's wrapped around and that it takes courage to be disliked,

1201
01:01:11,600 --> 01:01:14,520
Speaker 1: which is something you like. It makes you uncomfortable, the

1202
01:01:14,560 --> 01:01:17,000
Speaker 1: same way stand up does. Like maybe go into that

1203
01:01:17,080 --> 01:01:21,000
Speaker 1: fear of like, maybe someone I don't like might not

1204
01:01:21,120 --> 01:01:23,280
Speaker 1: like me, because that's the thing when I see people

1205
01:01:23,320 --> 01:01:25,800
Speaker 1: pleasing other people, where I go, you don't even like

1206
01:01:25,880 --> 01:01:30,000
Speaker 1: that person, why do you care if they like you? Like?

1207
01:01:30,280 --> 01:01:31,880
Speaker 1: And I did that the other night, Like there's a

1208
01:01:31,920 --> 01:01:33,960
Speaker 1: comedian I do not like, and I like hugged him

1209
01:01:34,000 --> 01:01:35,760
Speaker 1: because I hate him so much. I didn't want him

1210
01:01:35,800 --> 01:01:37,640
Speaker 1: to know I hated him. So I went the opposite way,

1211
01:01:37,680 --> 01:01:40,320
Speaker 1: and I go, why me hugging this person? So that

1212
01:01:40,400 --> 01:01:42,880
Speaker 1: was my recent like the most people pleasing thing I did.

1213
01:01:43,160 --> 01:01:46,200
Speaker 1: But for me, my most people pleasing thing is having

1214
01:01:46,240 --> 01:01:49,640
Speaker 1: sex with someone who um in the middle of it.

1215
01:01:49,760 --> 01:01:52,640
Speaker 1: I just like, I don't want it to be happening.

1216
01:01:52,720 --> 01:01:56,080
Speaker 1: But this person I'm in a relationship with or whatever

1217
01:01:56,160 --> 01:01:59,040
Speaker 1: kind of relationship, and it's time to have sex. That's

1218
01:01:59,040 --> 01:02:00,919
Speaker 1: the point. And I it's kind of into it at first,

1219
01:02:00,920 --> 01:02:03,000
Speaker 1: and now it's happening, and I like, do not want

1220
01:02:03,040 --> 01:02:05,520
Speaker 1: this person in me, I don't want to be with them.

1221
01:02:05,600 --> 01:02:07,560
Speaker 1: And and this happens during dinners too. If I go

1222
01:02:07,560 --> 01:02:09,960
Speaker 1: to a dinner with someone and I'm like a first

1223
01:02:10,040 --> 01:02:11,320
Speaker 1: date where I'm like, I sit down, I'm like, I'm

1224
01:02:11,360 --> 01:02:13,160
Speaker 1: not into this guy. This person is like getting my

1225
01:02:13,240 --> 01:02:15,640
Speaker 1: attention and my time, and I don't want to be here,

1226
01:02:15,760 --> 01:02:17,720
Speaker 1: but I'm staying because I'm too scared to be rude,

1227
01:02:18,040 --> 01:02:21,080
Speaker 1: and it feels like I'm raping myself. It honestly, is

1228
01:02:21,120 --> 01:02:23,480
Speaker 1: like such a betrayal to myself that it fills me

1229
01:02:23,520 --> 01:02:27,840
Speaker 1: with such self loathing and hatred to abandon myself that way.

1230
01:02:27,880 --> 01:02:31,000
Speaker 1: So that's what when I don't stop sexual encounters or

1231
01:02:31,040 --> 01:02:33,320
Speaker 1: sexual things from happening while they're happening, even though it

1232
01:02:33,400 --> 01:02:36,280
Speaker 1: was consensual and everything, the second I don't enjoy it,

1233
01:02:36,320 --> 01:02:38,800
Speaker 1: and I keep letting it happen. I just that's the

1234
01:02:38,800 --> 01:02:41,120
Speaker 1: most people pleasing things. But it's so hard to tell

1235
01:02:41,160 --> 01:02:44,000
Speaker 1: a person we have to stop having sex. I don't.

1236
01:02:44,120 --> 01:02:45,680
Speaker 1: I am disgusted by you right now. I mean, like,

1237
01:02:45,720 --> 01:02:48,360
Speaker 1: what do you say? It's very hard. Yeah, I mean

1238
01:02:48,440 --> 01:02:53,800
Speaker 1: that seems like an extremely important one. But I'll tell you,

1239
01:02:54,520 --> 01:02:57,200
Speaker 1: so many people are listening right now that men and

1240
01:02:57,240 --> 01:02:58,880
Speaker 1: women who know exactly what I'm talking about. In the

1241
01:02:58,920 --> 01:03:01,000
Speaker 1: middle of it, you're just like know and you just

1242
01:03:01,040 --> 01:03:04,000
Speaker 1: go through with it because you already started. And the

1243
01:03:04,040 --> 01:03:05,840
Speaker 1: thing is, you don't. I've told a man to get

1244
01:03:05,840 --> 01:03:07,760
Speaker 1: out of me and it ended our relationship, but it

1245
01:03:07,760 --> 01:03:10,200
Speaker 1: it needed to be ended, and it was really awkward.

1246
01:03:10,200 --> 01:03:12,120
Speaker 1: But I was like, I just I don't want this

1247
01:03:12,160 --> 01:03:13,760
Speaker 1: and you need to get out of me right now,

1248
01:03:13,880 --> 01:03:15,880
Speaker 1: like right now. It has to end or it's going

1249
01:03:15,960 --> 01:03:19,800
Speaker 1: to start feeling like I'm I'm raping myself with you. Pete.

1250
01:03:19,800 --> 01:03:22,720
Speaker 1: What is your most people pleasing thing? Um right? I

1251
01:03:22,760 --> 01:03:25,080
Speaker 1: mean it's kind of something that's going on in my

1252
01:03:25,160 --> 01:03:28,880
Speaker 1: life right now. And I do think, just like I

1253
01:03:28,920 --> 01:03:31,840
Speaker 1: said before, there's things that benefit me and then there's

1254
01:03:31,880 --> 01:03:35,760
Speaker 1: a way that I'm people leasing. So I am recently single,

1255
01:03:36,560 --> 01:03:40,280
Speaker 1: but I'm keeping the parrot, which is her parrot and

1256
01:03:40,480 --> 01:03:43,440
Speaker 1: um u in the relationship. She wanted to get a

1257
01:03:43,480 --> 01:03:45,880
Speaker 1: parrot like she wanted to get a parrot, like a

1258
01:03:45,880 --> 01:03:47,920
Speaker 1: brand new parrot, and I was like, you have a

1259
01:03:47,960 --> 01:03:51,560
Speaker 1: parrot down in Muscle Shoals, Alabama. So I went down

1260
01:03:51,640 --> 01:03:55,000
Speaker 1: and I rescued this parrot who was dying because she's

1261
01:03:55,000 --> 01:03:57,880
Speaker 1: plucking her feathers up because she was lonely. And I

1262
01:03:58,080 --> 01:04:01,760
Speaker 1: but and I brought and I brought her up to California.

1263
01:04:02,040 --> 01:04:03,880
Speaker 1: And I knew that when I brought her up here

1264
01:04:04,640 --> 01:04:08,920
Speaker 1: that I was making a decision that she's she's my responsibility,

1265
01:04:09,080 --> 01:04:12,760
Speaker 1: like like I like, this is technically my ex is bird,

1266
01:04:12,800 --> 01:04:16,800
Speaker 1: but she's my responsibility. And it all started with me going,

1267
01:04:16,840 --> 01:04:18,360
Speaker 1: I don't want to get a bird, Like I don't.

1268
01:04:18,400 --> 01:04:19,920
Speaker 1: I don't want to get a bird. I don't want

1269
01:04:19,920 --> 01:04:21,680
Speaker 1: to have a pet. I don't want to have that responsibility.

1270
01:04:21,720 --> 01:04:24,280
Speaker 1: But as soon as I made the decision that I

1271
01:04:24,360 --> 01:04:26,520
Speaker 1: was gonna get this bird, I knew that it was

1272
01:04:26,560 --> 01:04:30,280
Speaker 1: on me. So now we're broken up, I'm keeping the bird,

1273
01:04:30,800 --> 01:04:33,920
Speaker 1: and this bird is going to live to be ninety

1274
01:04:34,040 --> 01:04:36,200
Speaker 1: years old, so like, I'm gonna have to make a

1275
01:04:36,200 --> 01:04:40,280
Speaker 1: will for this bird. And like I so I would

1276
01:04:40,280 --> 01:04:42,960
Speaker 1: say that this is like an example of of like

1277
01:04:43,040 --> 01:04:47,040
Speaker 1: I people pleased initially in this situation. So your girlfriend

1278
01:04:47,080 --> 01:04:49,240
Speaker 1: a thing that would make her feel better and that

1279
01:04:49,360 --> 01:04:52,640
Speaker 1: she wanted. Yeah, and now you've decided to do something

1280
01:04:52,680 --> 01:04:56,000
Speaker 1: for yourself by keeping the bird. Yeah, and the bird

1281
01:04:56,120 --> 01:05:00,160
Speaker 1: is so awesome. Like this bird she learns word in

1282
01:05:00,400 --> 01:05:03,080
Speaker 1: whatever dialect or voice that she learned. What kind of

1283
01:05:03,120 --> 01:05:05,840
Speaker 1: bird is it? She's an African gray parent. Oh wow,

1284
01:05:05,840 --> 01:05:08,640
Speaker 1: those are the most talky ones. Yeah, she wakes me up.

1285
01:05:08,640 --> 01:05:11,360
Speaker 1: Do you guys want to go see her? I'm obsessed

1286
01:05:11,480 --> 01:05:13,760
Speaker 1: with birds. Yeah, can I, as you know, can I

1287
01:05:13,800 --> 01:05:15,760
Speaker 1: take you in there to see her. I'll have to

1288
01:05:15,840 --> 01:05:17,760
Speaker 1: unplug the good sound and it will be just my computer.

1289
01:05:17,760 --> 01:05:24,880
Speaker 1: Don't even have to ask, Just do it, Pete, take

1290
01:05:24,960 --> 01:05:27,760
Speaker 1: us on a little trip. I really, I'm obsessed with parents.

1291
01:05:27,800 --> 01:05:29,800
Speaker 1: I forgot you had one. I would have come visit

1292
01:05:29,800 --> 01:05:34,800
Speaker 1: you and hung out with you so much sooner. You

1293
01:05:34,880 --> 01:05:36,800
Speaker 1: keep asking me and I say no because I'm not

1294
01:05:36,840 --> 01:05:39,840
Speaker 1: trying to people. Please, and I just hello. She's so

1295
01:05:40,080 --> 01:05:42,360
Speaker 1: cute her. Did you get her rogain? What's going on?

1296
01:05:42,400 --> 01:05:44,240
Speaker 1: Why is her feathers are coming back? Yeah? So her

1297
01:05:44,240 --> 01:05:47,200
Speaker 1: feathers were all plucked out and now they're coming back.

1298
01:05:47,800 --> 01:05:52,480
Speaker 1: What's her name? Alex? Hi? Alex? Yeah, Oh you're cuteie

1299
01:05:52,560 --> 01:06:00,440
Speaker 1: booty friend Yeah shit, oh god damn him? And I

1300
01:06:00,480 --> 01:06:04,000
Speaker 1: love her. Yeah, she's absolutely amazing. Nikki. She wakes me

1301
01:06:04,080 --> 01:06:10,280
Speaker 1: up every single morning, but in my voice, going hi, Hello, Hi, Hi, Hi.

1302
01:06:10,600 --> 01:06:13,000
Speaker 1: As soon as it's no wonder your girlfriend didn't want

1303
01:06:13,080 --> 01:06:15,280
Speaker 1: your ex girlfriend didn't want it. Yeah right, she has

1304
01:06:15,280 --> 01:06:17,000
Speaker 1: to wake up to you every morning the rest of

1305
01:06:17,000 --> 01:06:22,840
Speaker 1: her life. Yeah, fucking c pap Yeah. Oh yeah. That's

1306
01:06:22,880 --> 01:06:27,560
Speaker 1: so of this window that looks out into like onto

1307
01:06:27,560 --> 01:06:31,040
Speaker 1: this palm tree in the pool area, and so as

1308
01:06:31,080 --> 01:06:34,720
Speaker 1: soon as as soon as the sun comes up, um,

1309
01:06:34,760 --> 01:06:36,920
Speaker 1: and she sees it through the curtains, she wants me

1310
01:06:36,960 --> 01:06:39,760
Speaker 1: to open up the curtains. So she's put a blanket

1311
01:06:39,800 --> 01:06:42,640
Speaker 1: over her cage. That was she Um, she doesn't like that.

1312
01:06:42,720 --> 01:06:46,080
Speaker 1: Anytime our cage is covered, she likes like she literally

1313
01:06:46,160 --> 01:06:49,800
Speaker 1: freaks out and it sounds like like a cage. Like

1314
01:06:49,840 --> 01:06:51,440
Speaker 1: if I come over, can I hold her? And she

1315
01:06:51,480 --> 01:06:55,280
Speaker 1: won't rip off my finger? Um? She um, she won't

1316
01:06:55,280 --> 01:06:57,840
Speaker 1: bite you if I get her out of the cage first, like,

1317
01:06:58,360 --> 01:07:03,000
Speaker 1: but she'll she's like a real sweetie. Um, I'm obsessed

1318
01:07:03,040 --> 01:07:06,040
Speaker 1: with parrots. Yeah, Alex is like she's like the best

1319
01:07:06,160 --> 01:07:10,720
Speaker 1: best bird and so like this is an example of

1320
01:07:10,720 --> 01:07:12,960
Speaker 1: of like I totally people pleased in the beginning, but

1321
01:07:13,040 --> 01:07:15,960
Speaker 1: now like I love her and she's like my best friend.

1322
01:07:16,200 --> 01:07:19,720
Speaker 1: She's the best. Andrew, what about you. What is your

1323
01:07:19,920 --> 01:07:23,600
Speaker 1: most people pleasing moment? Pretending like you were interested in Pettsburg?

1324
01:07:25,560 --> 01:07:29,680
Speaker 1: And it's definitely top five for sure. Uh yeah, I

1325
01:07:30,120 --> 01:07:33,080
Speaker 1: really wow. That bird's cool, dude. Yeah. I love parents.

1326
01:07:33,160 --> 01:07:36,000
Speaker 1: I want to get one so bad. This is my

1327
01:07:36,080 --> 01:07:39,479
Speaker 1: living room and like literally open like all these open

1328
01:07:39,600 --> 01:07:41,400
Speaker 1: up and it becomes a deck and then it looks

1329
01:07:41,400 --> 01:07:44,800
Speaker 1: out on the ocean. It's great. Well, that'd be great

1330
01:07:44,800 --> 01:07:50,240
Speaker 1: if our podcast was video. It's not a lot of this.

1331
01:07:50,400 --> 01:07:53,360
Speaker 1: A lot of this podcast has been visual. We like

1332
01:07:53,440 --> 01:07:58,240
Speaker 1: explaining frog skin the bird, explain the sexual position. Because

1333
01:07:58,240 --> 01:08:01,640
Speaker 1: I'm a radio professional. You did a good job. I

1334
01:08:01,640 --> 01:08:08,040
Speaker 1: couldn't do it, Andrew. Most people please the most, like

1335
01:08:08,360 --> 01:08:10,520
Speaker 1: when I look back, just like the moments when I

1336
01:08:10,560 --> 01:08:13,160
Speaker 1: would be at a comedy club hanging out and just

1337
01:08:13,480 --> 01:08:16,439
Speaker 1: being a fake person by hoping people would like me.

1338
01:08:16,479 --> 01:08:18,960
Speaker 1: I just have so many like moments in my head

1339
01:08:19,000 --> 01:08:22,280
Speaker 1: of like being fake and being like, oh wow, you're

1340
01:08:22,320 --> 01:08:25,559
Speaker 1: so funny up there, you're great. Oh my god, wow,

1341
01:08:25,600 --> 01:08:28,120
Speaker 1: And I put on this personality and I don't even

1342
01:08:28,160 --> 01:08:30,559
Speaker 1: know who this is. Oh my god. When that guy

1343
01:08:30,640 --> 01:08:35,880
Speaker 1: comes out, I want to fucking well he has. But

1344
01:08:35,920 --> 01:08:37,960
Speaker 1: a lot of them know that guy comes out sometimes

1345
01:08:38,000 --> 01:08:41,040
Speaker 1: when you get really excited about a new like famous

1346
01:08:41,120 --> 01:08:44,880
Speaker 1: person or like a sports like it's that that comes out.

1347
01:08:46,320 --> 01:08:50,439
Speaker 1: I just agree with you right now. No, I know

1348
01:08:50,520 --> 01:08:53,000
Speaker 1: exactly what you mean about like just sucking up to

1349
01:08:53,080 --> 01:08:58,519
Speaker 1: comics who might be you're just like I just it's

1350
01:08:58,520 --> 01:09:02,800
Speaker 1: so nice, cooler for comedy. Like before, like I when

1351
01:09:02,800 --> 01:09:05,439
Speaker 1: I wasn't trying to get anything, I was cooler, like

1352
01:09:05,479 --> 01:09:07,720
Speaker 1: I was just like but then again trying to get

1353
01:09:07,760 --> 01:09:10,080
Speaker 1: like laid back in the day, and I guess you

1354
01:09:10,080 --> 01:09:12,400
Speaker 1: really weren't really like you were trying to get guy

1355
01:09:12,520 --> 01:09:15,479
Speaker 1: friends and like have like the jocks like you and

1356
01:09:15,520 --> 01:09:19,200
Speaker 1: like you probably had that demeanor with them. No, I did,

1357
01:09:19,240 --> 01:09:21,240
Speaker 1: But I never had these thoughts of like, I hope

1358
01:09:21,240 --> 01:09:24,000
Speaker 1: this guy likes I. Never I feel like comedy brings

1359
01:09:24,000 --> 01:09:26,240
Speaker 1: that out in US, where we're like I hope this

1360
01:09:26,280 --> 01:09:29,080
Speaker 1: guy who's better or has more followers likes me. I

1361
01:09:29,120 --> 01:09:31,320
Speaker 1: don't think like, oh, this guy has more money, I

1362
01:09:31,360 --> 01:09:33,720
Speaker 1: hope he likes I just never really thought like that.

1363
01:09:33,800 --> 01:09:36,479
Speaker 1: I really didn't. Just kind of just went through life

1364
01:09:36,560 --> 01:09:39,759
Speaker 1: being a disaster. And if you stuck on, you're probably

1365
01:09:39,800 --> 01:09:41,880
Speaker 1: my good friend, you know what I mean, Like I

1366
01:09:42,000 --> 01:09:44,599
Speaker 1: just like did whatever the funk I wanted in a way,

1367
01:09:45,000 --> 01:09:47,920
Speaker 1: And someone doesn't like you, that's better than like if

1368
01:09:47,960 --> 01:09:50,680
Speaker 1: they don't care. Almost like, if someone doesn't like you, you

1369
01:09:50,600 --> 01:09:53,200
Speaker 1: you should take that as like there's energy going into that.

1370
01:09:53,280 --> 01:09:55,680
Speaker 1: But if they they don't even know. Most of the

1371
01:09:55,760 --> 01:09:57,760
Speaker 1: time you think someone doesn't like you, they don't think

1372
01:09:57,840 --> 01:10:00,720
Speaker 1: about you at all. I hope people are making a

1373
01:10:01,240 --> 01:10:03,519
Speaker 1: people are making a choice. The same guy that's like hey,

1374
01:10:04,040 --> 01:10:06,040
Speaker 1: like me, like me? The same guy is like cool

1375
01:10:06,080 --> 01:10:08,400
Speaker 1: and in the corner. It's a choice, and it's the

1376
01:10:08,439 --> 01:10:12,519
Speaker 1: same kind of choice. Yeah, and you trying to get Yeah,

1377
01:10:12,600 --> 01:10:14,880
Speaker 1: you get people to pay attention to you by being

1378
01:10:15,120 --> 01:10:17,599
Speaker 1: but you also think, like who is myself? Isn't myself

1379
01:10:17,640 --> 01:10:19,599
Speaker 1: the person that wants people to like me? Like, so

1380
01:10:19,960 --> 01:10:22,320
Speaker 1: how do I be myself? You know, it's it's always

1381
01:10:22,360 --> 01:10:25,760
Speaker 1: kind of fraud. Final thought, Um, Pete, you have a

1382
01:10:25,800 --> 01:10:29,080
Speaker 1: special coming out on Showtime July nine, Tall and dark

1383
01:10:29,240 --> 01:10:32,120
Speaker 1: and pleasant? What kind of what kind of stuff are

1384
01:10:32,160 --> 01:10:33,640
Speaker 1: we going to see in the special from you that

1385
01:10:33,680 --> 01:10:36,400
Speaker 1: we haven't before? Why are you exceptionally proud of this one?

1386
01:10:36,439 --> 01:10:38,559
Speaker 1: Because I mean, if you haven't if you don't know,

1387
01:10:38,600 --> 01:10:41,559
Speaker 1: Pete Lee he's uh killed on the Tonight Show. How

1388
01:10:41,600 --> 01:10:44,639
Speaker 1: many times you do seven or six? Six times? Yeah,

1389
01:10:44,640 --> 01:10:48,400
Speaker 1: I've done it six times, and like I, um, I

1390
01:10:48,439 --> 01:10:51,080
Speaker 1: think people should watch this because it's literally like my

1391
01:10:51,280 --> 01:10:54,479
Speaker 1: greatest hits, like the current, like up until the Special,

1392
01:10:54,680 --> 01:10:56,559
Speaker 1: my favorite stuff that I was doing at that moment,

1393
01:10:57,200 --> 01:11:00,960
Speaker 1: like the stuff that kills the hardest. And I wasn't

1394
01:11:01,000 --> 01:11:03,800
Speaker 1: worried at all about having anything left in the tank

1395
01:11:03,960 --> 01:11:06,439
Speaker 1: like to too or with afterwards. So I filmed on

1396
01:11:06,640 --> 01:11:10,320
Speaker 1: February because you weren't going on tour. I was, Yeah,

1397
01:11:10,320 --> 01:11:12,120
Speaker 1: I wasn't going on tour. Like I'm ready to burn

1398
01:11:12,160 --> 01:11:14,479
Speaker 1: it all, just burn it all, burn it all down,

1399
01:11:14,680 --> 01:11:17,200
Speaker 1: and so like I'm really in The parrot was tired

1400
01:11:17,240 --> 01:11:21,559
Speaker 1: of hearing it. Yeah. The parrot was like she was like, um,

1401
01:11:23,120 --> 01:11:25,600
Speaker 1: that's your clothes are? Yeah? Can I tell you one

1402
01:11:25,640 --> 01:11:27,760
Speaker 1: of my favorite things that she says sidebar, she goes,

1403
01:11:27,840 --> 01:11:36,439
Speaker 1: she goes ship. It's so it's so funny. Um My

1404
01:11:36,760 --> 01:11:39,560
Speaker 1: one time Mike Bird my parke Kiwi when I was

1405
01:11:39,600 --> 01:11:43,360
Speaker 1: in high school, even just he would just go like

1406
01:11:43,560 --> 01:11:45,240
Speaker 1: I can't even do like sounds and what time we

1407
01:11:45,360 --> 01:11:53,799
Speaker 1: heard him go, mom, I hate my fucking middle name.

1408
01:11:53,840 --> 01:11:56,639
Speaker 1: And we are we go, Why did he just say, mom,

1409
01:11:56,680 --> 01:11:58,960
Speaker 1: I hate my funny middle name in my voice because

1410
01:11:59,000 --> 01:12:01,320
Speaker 1: I don't know my middle name? I do I do

1411
01:12:01,400 --> 01:12:04,080
Speaker 1: scream like that at my mom probably sometime, but we

1412
01:12:04,360 --> 01:12:06,080
Speaker 1: me and my friend Huffy both heard it. We go.

1413
01:12:06,160 --> 01:12:08,040
Speaker 1: Did he just say, mom, I hate my fucking middle

1414
01:12:08,120 --> 01:12:09,760
Speaker 1: name in the middle of a bunch of difference? It

1415
01:12:09,840 --> 01:12:12,120
Speaker 1: was so funny. I was like, I guess, I guess

1416
01:12:12,120 --> 01:12:17,120
Speaker 1: I've said that before. My middle name such a long

1417
01:12:17,240 --> 01:12:20,320
Speaker 1: thing for a bird, especially when everything else is just repeated.

1418
01:12:20,680 --> 01:12:26,080
Speaker 1: Did you ever do another long sentenced name? It was

1419
01:12:26,120 --> 01:12:30,439
Speaker 1: just like what it just came up and it was

1420
01:12:30,479 --> 01:12:32,880
Speaker 1: never repeated. I love that. No, it was like we

1421
01:12:33,200 --> 01:12:35,200
Speaker 1: but I had a witness in my friend Off. He

1422
01:12:35,320 --> 01:12:38,759
Speaker 1: was like, yes he said that. Um, but the special,

1423
01:12:39,280 --> 01:12:42,080
Speaker 1: uh yeah, it's it's your greated. I mean, Pete is

1424
01:12:42,160 --> 01:12:45,439
Speaker 1: so hilarious. You're going to love this special. Make sure

1425
01:12:45,479 --> 01:12:48,760
Speaker 1: you watch it, uh showtime if you have that, and

1426
01:12:48,760 --> 01:12:50,559
Speaker 1: then it will be on streaming, Like you'll be able

1427
01:12:50,600 --> 01:12:52,240
Speaker 1: to find it streaming. But July nine is when it

1428
01:12:52,240 --> 01:12:55,120
Speaker 1: will air on Showtime. Um, I'm assuming you're going out

1429
01:12:55,120 --> 01:12:57,599
Speaker 1: on the road. Yeah, I'm going out on the road.

1430
01:12:57,640 --> 01:13:02,120
Speaker 1: So from basically February until now, I've written a new hour.

1431
01:13:02,280 --> 01:13:05,360
Speaker 1: So I I like, I literally felt like you after

1432
01:13:05,479 --> 01:13:07,439
Speaker 1: you did Bang and where you would you'd go on

1433
01:13:07,479 --> 01:13:08,880
Speaker 1: social media and be like, I have a new hour,

1434
01:13:08,920 --> 01:13:12,480
Speaker 1: I'm touring with it, and I remember thinking like that's impossible.

1435
01:13:12,560 --> 01:13:14,840
Speaker 1: How the fund does she have a new hour already?

1436
01:13:15,080 --> 01:13:17,320
Speaker 1: And I have a new hour already, and it's like

1437
01:13:17,360 --> 01:13:19,280
Speaker 1: it's I've already been going out on the road. It's

1438
01:13:19,280 --> 01:13:22,000
Speaker 1: been killing. I've been tuning it up at clubs and

1439
01:13:22,240 --> 01:13:24,879
Speaker 1: you have it like beginning middle end, you know exactly

1440
01:13:24,920 --> 01:13:29,320
Speaker 1: the order and everything. Yeah. I mean, I'm you work

1441
01:13:29,360 --> 01:13:31,200
Speaker 1: in a different way than I do well, and you

1442
01:13:31,280 --> 01:13:35,400
Speaker 1: must have been a skier at some point. I mean,

1443
01:13:35,520 --> 01:13:38,719
Speaker 1: I'm I'm open, like I'm still writing and I'm gonna

1444
01:13:38,760 --> 01:13:41,280
Speaker 1: be like replacing and you know, getting things that like,

1445
01:13:41,360 --> 01:13:43,680
Speaker 1: you know, here's my test of a good bit is

1446
01:13:43,720 --> 01:13:46,280
Speaker 1: when you get when you start going into it and

1447
01:13:46,320 --> 01:13:49,120
Speaker 1: you go, oh, this three minutes is going to be easy,

1448
01:13:49,600 --> 01:13:52,439
Speaker 1: like you know, yes, you just go I'm just gonna

1449
01:13:52,520 --> 01:13:55,720
Speaker 1: put it like, yeah, I don't have to work for

1450
01:13:55,720 --> 01:13:58,519
Speaker 1: this three minutes because this is gonna be good, and

1451
01:13:58,840 --> 01:14:01,519
Speaker 1: I just know it works. It's just a safe space.

1452
01:14:01,640 --> 01:14:05,639
Speaker 1: I don't have to think. Yeah, definitely, Cruis control love it. Yeah,

1453
01:14:05,640 --> 01:14:08,040
Speaker 1: and I gotta say like, and I mean, I don't

1454
01:14:08,040 --> 01:14:12,120
Speaker 1: want to put down uh tall, dark and pleasant. Um,

1455
01:14:12,200 --> 01:14:16,400
Speaker 1: but this is going to be again it's not visual

1456
01:14:16,840 --> 01:14:19,519
Speaker 1: all right. Yeah, he's again. He's showing us a picture

1457
01:14:19,520 --> 01:14:22,680
Speaker 1: on his phone. It's like it's Pete's first podcast. Everyone

1458
01:14:23,400 --> 01:14:26,519
Speaker 1: hanging there with him as we approached the end of

1459
01:14:26,520 --> 01:14:28,960
Speaker 1: the show. He's just figuring out that you guys aren't

1460
01:14:28,960 --> 01:14:32,400
Speaker 1: all watching live on zoom like where some like the

1461
01:14:32,400 --> 01:14:36,360
Speaker 1: Fraser reunion. For my script read through for our next segment,

1462
01:14:36,400 --> 01:14:40,439
Speaker 1: how many fingers am I holding up? Wait? I want

1463
01:14:40,479 --> 01:14:43,080
Speaker 1: everyone to guess at home, seriously, guess how many fingers

1464
01:14:43,280 --> 01:14:45,600
Speaker 1: holding up before we leave? And if you get it right,

1465
01:14:45,640 --> 01:14:47,880
Speaker 1: you're gonna have a great day. Okay, one through five?

1466
01:14:47,920 --> 01:14:49,960
Speaker 1: One through five, one through five, make a guess, and

1467
01:14:49,960 --> 01:14:52,200
Speaker 1: if you get it right, you're gonna have a great day.

1468
01:14:52,400 --> 01:14:58,080
Speaker 1: The answer is four. If you guess four, you're gonna

1469
01:14:58,080 --> 01:15:00,759
Speaker 1: have a great day and all your dreams come true today,

1470
01:15:00,800 --> 01:15:02,960
Speaker 1: and you like it's gonna happen if you didn't guess,

1471
01:15:03,000 --> 01:15:06,559
Speaker 1: for fucking drive carefully, Yeah, and if you think that

1472
01:15:06,720 --> 01:15:10,439
Speaker 1: was fun, watch Tall, Dark and Pleasant on showtime July night.

1473
01:15:11,000 --> 01:15:18,200
Speaker 1: Definitely well listen to it on mutes and then listen

1474
01:15:18,240 --> 01:15:20,439
Speaker 1: to this this podcast over it and it will sing up perfectly.

1475
01:15:20,640 --> 01:15:24,080
Speaker 1: You play this backwards, uh, in slow motion and it

1476
01:15:24,120 --> 01:15:27,320
Speaker 1: will sing up perfectly with Tall, Dark and Pleasant muted

1477
01:15:27,960 --> 01:15:34,960
Speaker 1: at us album backwards and you'll hear Pete Special Petelee.

1478
01:15:34,960 --> 01:15:37,320
Speaker 1: Thank used so much for being with us today. Uh.

1479
01:15:37,360 --> 01:15:39,360
Speaker 1: And maybe I will come see your bird tonight. I'm

1480
01:15:39,360 --> 01:15:42,360
Speaker 1: in town one more night. Um. Love having you on

1481
01:15:42,400 --> 01:15:45,800
Speaker 1: the podcast. Thank you, Noah, thank you Andrew. So sorry

1482
01:15:45,800 --> 01:15:47,519
Speaker 1: I was late today. I'm going to go record the

1483
01:15:47,560 --> 01:15:50,200
Speaker 1: top of the show, which you already heard. Uh, isn't

1484
01:15:50,200 --> 01:15:52,640
Speaker 1: that weird? Um? And we'll see you tomorrow. Busties, keep

1485
01:15:52,680 --> 01:15:54,559
Speaker 1: looking for fashion eggs. And I love you so much.

1486
01:15:54,560 --> 01:15:56,439
Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to the the show. Get your friends into it,

1487
01:15:56,840 --> 01:16:00,960
Speaker 1: and uh yeah, see you tomorrow for Thursday's episode. Hag