Speaker 1: The Nikki Gliser podcastsers.
Speaker 2: Here I am, I mean Key Laser. Welcome to the
Speaker 2: Nikkei Glazer Podcast. I am here today in my studio apartment,
Speaker 2: my studio, in my apartment, my studio, in my three
Speaker 2: bedroom apartment, which one of the bedrooms is a studio,
Speaker 2: so my two but it doesn't matter. I'm thinking about
Speaker 2: getting a house soon. I'm just kind of bursting at
Speaker 2: the seams with stuff that's beside the point. Actually it's not,
Speaker 2: because this is all you're getting today, just for now
Speaker 2: at least. Brian Frangie is no longer with us, not permanently,
Speaker 2: but he's just I didn't mean to scare you guys
Speaker 2: like that. He is recovering from gallbladder surgery, so he
Speaker 2: had that on Monday. I'm recording this on a Wednesday.
Speaker 2: I've checked in with him. He's doing well, he is.
Speaker 2: He said it was not as bad as the other
Speaker 2: surgeries he's had in his life. What did he say?
Speaker 2: I think he'd be fine with me reading you this.
Speaker 2: I had laparoscopic ball surgery in my twenties and it
Speaker 2: was much worse. And he said the pain of the
Speaker 2: tooth extractions were worse. He said sleeping is okay. Not
Speaker 2: bad teeth, He's his teeth pretty much are the same.
Speaker 2: He feels much better overall. He said, it feels like
Speaker 2: he was being poisoned, and his deterioration happened so gradually
Speaker 2: that it was difficult to see how bad it was.
Speaker 2: After the surgery, I feel much better overall. That's so
Speaker 2: great when you remove something from your life, whether it
Speaker 2: be a husband, or a gallbladder or a I don't
Speaker 2: know what else. I'm trying to think of something that
Speaker 2: I've removed from my life, and then suddenly it was
Speaker 2: just so much more comfortable. Uh, jeanes that don't fit,
Speaker 2: just getting clothes that fit, and then you're like, oh
Speaker 2: my god, I don't realize how fucking in pain I
Speaker 2: was all the time. I think, I really, I've always
Speaker 2: said it on this podcast. I really resonate. I hate
Speaker 2: when people say they resonate with something. I think something
Speaker 2: is supposed to resonate with you, but people always say
Speaker 2: that resonates with me, and I that I read with that.
Speaker 2: I don't like when people say I resonate. Can you resonate?
Speaker 2: I think you can. I googled it and I was like,
Speaker 2: I found out that those people were right, even though
Speaker 2: they sound wrong to me, but I'm still not I'm
Speaker 2: not going to say it anyway. I do resonate with
Speaker 2: uh people having chronic pain because I've had like my
Speaker 2: rants before, or I don't resonate with them. I have
Speaker 2: so much empathy because I don't know what it's like
Speaker 2: to have like long term chronic pain. But I just
Speaker 2: whenever someone has a headache, I like can't handle it.
Speaker 2: If someone has a headache in my presence and you
Speaker 2: work for me, I want you to stay home and
Speaker 2: I'll try to do your job or something, or if
Speaker 2: like I just don't want to be around someone with
Speaker 2: a headache because I can't stand thinking how badly they're
Speaker 2: in pain. Because I'm just such a good person, can't
Speaker 2: you tell No? It's just like that's that's my thing.
Speaker 2: It's not even the nice thing because then they're like,
Speaker 2: don't take on my pain. I'm not asking you to
Speaker 2: do that, but I just can't help it. I don't
Speaker 2: like people being uncomfortable. It's one of my I think
Speaker 2: number one things in life is trying to make sure
Speaker 2: people are comfortable. Although I'm not good at offering people
Speaker 2: drinks when they get to my apartment or house, because
Speaker 2: I actually have no problem asking when I'm at a
Speaker 2: guest's house if I can have some water or a drink.
Speaker 2: In fact, I was at my boyfriend's brothers and his
Speaker 2: sister in law's house this weekend for Father's Day, and
Speaker 2: he asked me if I wanted to drink. And I
Speaker 2: had seen a like a sliver. I just like made
Speaker 2: eye contact with a zvia that was in their refrigerator
Speaker 2: when he opened it to get something like twenty minutes earlier,
Speaker 2: and I was like, I think they have ZVA, Like
Speaker 2: I just saw a flash of it. But I drink
Speaker 2: so much ZV I'm like, am I just like seeing
Speaker 2: it everywhere? And he was like do you I go
Speaker 2: what do you got? And I was hoping that he's
Speaker 2: gonna say ZV so I didn't have to be like
Speaker 2: I saw one and I want it, But he was like,
Speaker 2: we got Pellegrino, we got Lacroix. What flavor do you
Speaker 2: want with Topachuka. I mean, they have amazing choices. It's
Speaker 2: no wonder they also have ZVA. And I go, oh,
Speaker 2: do you have zva? And he's like, yeah, do you
Speaker 2: want that? I'm like, of course, but he said, Oh,
Speaker 2: you mean the routier. I'm like, I don't call it that,
Speaker 2: but it is root beer. It's so delicious. Yeah, Happy
Speaker 2: Father's Day. I didn't do an episode yesterday. I'm sorry
Speaker 2: that we didn't have one for you. Brian was off
Speaker 2: this week and I just didn't feel like it. I
Speaker 2: had a micro needling and my face was really red.
Speaker 2: It still is different shades of red. It looks like
Speaker 2: I just got really burnt. It looks like I was
Speaker 2: just like drunk on spring break, you know, early or
Speaker 2: late nineties. I feel like people were still not wearing
Speaker 2: sunblock in the nineties. I think that's one of the
Speaker 2: most embarrassing things is being burnt as a white person. Obviously,
Speaker 2: I think like that that didn't need to be said,
Speaker 2: But I mean, black people can get burnt. I think
Speaker 2: I don't know, I should know. I'm sorry for my ignorance.
Speaker 2: Please someone educate me. Anyway, I think being a burnt
Speaker 2: white person is a really embarrassing thing. I've been at before.
Speaker 2: But like, if you're an adult and you're getting burnt,
Speaker 2: I'm sorry you are not taking care of yourself. You're
Speaker 2: not thinking. It's like the same as not wearing a seatbelt,
Speaker 2: like I just can't handle. Sunscreen doesn't make you gay, Guys.
Speaker 2: It's not like a it's not a lotion that smells
Speaker 2: a certain way.
Speaker 1: Like.
Speaker 2: It doesn't mean you're like treating your body like a
Speaker 2: woman would and caressing it, even though you should. You
Speaker 2: should appreciate your bodies just as much as we are
Speaker 2: supposed to appreciate ours, even though we do the opposite
Speaker 2: of that. Actually, anyway, wearing SPF isn't gay, or just
Speaker 2: like beat just not wanting to get skin cancer isn't gay.
Speaker 2: But when I see burnt people, I really am embarrassed
Speaker 2: for them, and I think they should be ashamed. And
Speaker 2: I'm so not in the business of shaming people. But
Speaker 2: I guess today I am who knew when left to
Speaker 2: my own devices, Brian, come back, what am I doing? Anyway?
Speaker 2: So on the podcast today we are having a guest,
Speaker 2: Gary Veder. He is a comedian. You may have seen
Speaker 2: him on America's Gun Talent. He is hilarious. He's been
Speaker 2: on The Tonight Show, I Think Like a Bunch and
Speaker 2: Colbert and all the things. He's just a fucking great
Speaker 2: stand up. But he also has a new podcast out
Speaker 2: where he you might have seen clips for it because
Speaker 2: my boyfriend had heard of it and didn't know his
Speaker 2: name out of the gate, but it was the guy
Speaker 2: who's has a podcast now called Number One Dad. It's
Speaker 2: on iHeart Big Money Players, which is where our podcast
Speaker 2: network is, but it's called Number One Dad, and it's
Speaker 2: about his dad, who is like a con man and
Speaker 2: who got Gary to pose as a reporter for the
Speaker 2: sports Kid's Sports Illustrated so he could get back to
Speaker 2: games in Madison Square Garden and like pretty much everywhere
Speaker 2: in New York City and I think surrounding areas, and
Speaker 2: he met dozens, maybe hundreds of athletes and celebrities by
Speaker 2: pulling the scam, and his dad would pose as a photographer.
Speaker 2: And it's a podcast and he hasn't talked to his
Speaker 2: dad and since he was fifteen. There's three episodes out
Speaker 2: right now. There might be a new one out by
Speaker 2: the time you hear this. I don't know when the
Speaker 2: new one comes out, but I think he's gonna meet
Speaker 2: his dad in this and it's so crazy because he
Speaker 2: hasn't talked to him since he was fifteen, and I
Speaker 2: think he's my age. Gary also has a kid, and
Speaker 2: I want to talk to him about that because I
Speaker 2: remember him being pregnant. I mean, not him being but
Speaker 2: you get it. And I don't think i've really talked
Speaker 2: to him since because it was pre COVID and that's
Speaker 2: when I would see Gary around, was like in New York.
Speaker 2: So I'm excited to reconnect with him today. Other things,
Speaker 2: I do have a dog. She is officially mine. I
Speaker 2: haven't signed the papers yet. I don't know why I'm wavering.
Speaker 2: It just feels like once it's done, it's really done,
Speaker 2: even though there's no taking giving this little girly back.
Speaker 2: She got spade on Monday. That's always a very bonding
Speaker 2: moment for two people, is when one has to take
Speaker 2: care of the other when they're sick and has to
Speaker 2: make sure that they don't bite their stitches out. But
Speaker 2: she also I just don't want her to have to
Speaker 2: wear the cone, so I'm just like having to watch
Speaker 2: her all the time so she doesn't get in there
Speaker 2: and try to get her see if her ovaries are
Speaker 2: still there, because they're not. She's six pounds and her
Speaker 2: ovaries we were like, what do they look like? My
Speaker 2: sister and I were thinking they look like lima beans.
Speaker 2: But she can't have kids.
Speaker 1: Now.
Speaker 2: That makes two of the us because now I don't
Speaker 2: need them because I've got this little baby, and I
Speaker 2: am leaning into the fact that she is my baby.
Speaker 2: I don't give a fuck. I love her. I also
Speaker 2: she is a burden. I've thought about naming her that
Speaker 2: just Birdie, which is short for burden, but no one
Speaker 2: would know that except you, guys, because I just told you,
Speaker 2: and that might still be her name because we haven't
Speaker 2: really settled on Gilly yet, so we're open to suggestions
Speaker 2: for a little adorable, big eyed, glassy eyed, watery eyed
Speaker 2: Chihuahua mix. You can look at her on the YouTube
Speaker 2: to see her. She's in my lap right now and
Speaker 2: just totally like zoning out, zoning out. She's so cuddly. Uh.
Speaker 2: But yeah, she is a burden and she is like
Speaker 2: a kid because like it's I mean, she's she's a
Speaker 2: kid who is gonna die young, pretty young, because she's
Speaker 2: only gonna live for about fifteen years tops. I think
Speaker 2: she's two, and I think the May she'll get to eighteen.
Speaker 2: My friend's dog, who's very very small like her, just
Speaker 2: got to eighteen years, so yeah, she'll be able to vote,
Speaker 2: and then she'll die God damn it, Gilly, I'm not
Speaker 2: laughing about your death. It's not funny. How old will
Speaker 2: I be? Fifteen years fifty five? Okay, I'm okay. My
Speaker 2: first thought was like, I'll look hot when I put
Speaker 2: you down. Still, what an idiot. I'll be like, look
Speaker 2: at I'll be sad, my mescara will be running. I'll
Speaker 2: wipe my tears, but I'll make sure to wipe them
Speaker 2: up so my skin doesn't get pulled down anymore than
Speaker 2: it already is. Oh god, you know I am just
Speaker 2: a product of my Instagram algorithm. I gotta get off
Speaker 2: this thing. I gotta stop scrolling. I'm tired of being
Speaker 2: fucked with in my brain about the clothes I should buy,
Speaker 2: about the face massages I should do, about the plastic
Speaker 2: surgery this girl had, and the I mean everything I'm
Speaker 2: getting set not everything, because I get really fun memes sometimes.
Speaker 2: Oh hey, Gary's here, we'll welcome you with Now what's up, Gary?
Speaker 2: I was just talking about Instagram and how I'm addicted
Speaker 2: to it. Are you addicted to Instagram as well?
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a problem, and especially now because I got
Speaker 3: like things going on, so I'm like constantly on that.
Speaker 2: And so you're checking, like how the things are doing,
Speaker 2: Your numbers are going up, people are dming you like
Speaker 2: you got to constantly be in there.
Speaker 3: Oh it makes me sick to my stomach how often
Speaker 3: I'm checking it?
Speaker 2: Are you also doing TikTok? Are you doing you?
Speaker 3: Like?
Speaker 2: What what are the what are your apps that you
Speaker 2: float between? Because mine's just up closed Instagram and just
Speaker 2: pick up Instagram again.
Speaker 1: So yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2: I don't like text anymore. I don't like emails because
Speaker 2: it's too much stuff that feels like it's if that
Speaker 2: stuff feels like work where it's Instagram like something fun might.
Speaker 3: Be bruin totally something fun, and you see like the likes.
Speaker 3: It looks cool when it like pops up, it's just
Speaker 3: like very special.
Speaker 1: But I'll check the other stuff.
Speaker 3: Only because I feel like I'm not giving them some time,
Speaker 3: and then I'd go right back to Instagram.
Speaker 1: Instagram is still my thing.
Speaker 2: And do you get into the reels, like are you
Speaker 2: using it like a TikTok user would use to.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I use it like that, and then I use
Speaker 3: the reels on Instagram. I use them on Facebook and
Speaker 3: then you're just like whoa, yeah, So it's the whole.
Speaker 1: Yeah, the whole.
Speaker 2: No, I mean like, are you consuming.
Speaker 1: Oh consuming them?
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I'm like checking them out and then I'm like,
Speaker 3: I don't even realize that I've been watching them for
Speaker 3: like thirty minutes.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's where I'm like, I'm sick of I do
Speaker 2: like I gotta check Mike. I don't like watching myself,
Speaker 2: so I don't look at my content. I actually have
Speaker 2: someone post for me and I just write the captions now,
Speaker 2: and she sends me clips to get We just I
Speaker 2: just got a girl to like a new company to
Speaker 2: start making clips for me, and they send them and
Speaker 2: they go approve these and I just never watch them
Speaker 2: because I never want to watch myself.
Speaker 1: And then they go, we.
Speaker 2: Would like, we'd like to start like having you know
Speaker 2: you post more, like we talked about in our meetings
Speaker 2: leading up to this partnership, and I go, actually, can
Speaker 2: I just trust you that they're good and you just
Speaker 2: post them because I don't even want to look at
Speaker 2: a second on myself. And but I will say, the
Speaker 2: thing that I'm constantly feeling just disgusted by on Instagram
Speaker 2: is just the reels that come up that are targeting
Speaker 2: my insecurities and that are targeting me to buy cardigans
Speaker 2: that they know I want that are five hundred and
Speaker 2: forty two fucking dollars and they shouldn't be. Yeah, they
Speaker 2: know it's my spending that they know that I will
Speaker 2: do that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they know everything that you want and then they
Speaker 3: just put it right in your face. So yeah, I
Speaker 3: mean everything is like I mean, I'll have uh my
Speaker 3: wife's not happy about this, but I have like you know,
Speaker 3: like they'll be puppies. They'll be like, oh, how to
Speaker 3: make you know, where to get the best burger, how
Speaker 3: to make the best like you know, homemade pizza. And
Speaker 3: then also it's like hot women and it's like, I mean,
Speaker 3: I can't hide from that.
Speaker 1: It's just like it knows where.
Speaker 2: One watching that you slowed down. They fed you one
Speaker 2: to test you. They saw that you slowed down, They
Speaker 2: saw that you pinched to zoom in on her ass
Speaker 2: or whatever you did, which is a normal.
Speaker 3: I blinked twice, and it just it just knew. It
Speaker 3: just knows everything about it.
Speaker 2: I hearted it when you blink. That's a new tapping.
Speaker 2: It's you're so right, like they they know and I
Speaker 2: and they they but I don't like the insecurity thing,
Speaker 2: and I was, as I was just talking to you,
Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't I think they know my spending habits,
Speaker 2: and instead of showing me things for a reasonable price,
Speaker 2: I think they're jacking up the price. Like I think
Speaker 2: they're like, this person we know will spend this, So
Speaker 2: we're gonna make this sweater that we would maybe sell
Speaker 2: to another girl for one hundred and twenty, We're gonna
Speaker 2: make it three twenty, right and see and put it
Speaker 2: under a different company name. But like, is that the
Speaker 2: drop shipping shit where it's just like they just make
Speaker 2: fake companies and market the same products whatever Tim Dillon's
Speaker 2: been ranting about recently. I'm like, I think it's all
Speaker 2: a scam and I'm tired of being a part of it.
Speaker 2: But I also do love when they kind of nail
Speaker 2: it sometimes and I go, oh my god, I did
Speaker 2: want to know this facial massage that yeah lifts right.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would look cool in those pants. I'm like,
Speaker 3: I'm fine with that, but yeah, and I buy them
Speaker 3: and then I look, you know, it looks terrible. And
Speaker 3: then how I have these pants that you apparently you
Speaker 3: can't even return, makes it?
Speaker 1: You know?
Speaker 2: So I'm like, oh, that's a beat up box from China.
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, Like you have no idea where you're like, oh,
Speaker 3: this is a cool brand I'd never heard of, and
Speaker 3: then it until you do buy it, yes, and then
Speaker 3: it winds up being like post rid.
Speaker 2: Of They like they'll show you the pant, they'll see
Speaker 2: that you slowed down on it, right, and then they go, actually,
Speaker 2: what else does he like? Oh, he likes basketball. We're
Speaker 2: like put a like a basketball in the shot, Like
Speaker 2: we'll put this guy walking on a court or something,
Speaker 2: and then they go, oh, that didn't get him. We're
Speaker 2: gonna call this the Jordan pant because we know he
Speaker 2: likes Michael Jordan. So that that's what they've been doing
Speaker 2: to me with Taylor Swift. They'll change the name of
Speaker 2: things to get into my swifty like just dedicated. I'll
Speaker 2: do anything, she says. Kind of brain. It's it's such manipulation,
Speaker 2: and I think it's happening in in ways that we
Speaker 2: don't even understand. And it's all a con which is
Speaker 2: like kind of a thing that obviously you are very
Speaker 2: either interested in or adverse to, based on I already
Speaker 2: filled in our listeners on your podcast. I listened to
Speaker 2: the first three episodes. How many episodes are there? I'm like,
Speaker 2: are you gonna meet your.
Speaker 3: Fucking Oh, thank you so much for listening, But so
Speaker 3: there's ten episodes all recorded already, and uh yeah, it's
Speaker 3: been It was like a crazy, you know, crazy thing
Speaker 3: to go through and everything.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, Well you really put yourself out there
Speaker 2: for this because you can tell like you got this
Speaker 2: podcast sold, it's gonna be big. Iheartradios behind it. You
Speaker 2: have producers, you have people who give like they're like
Speaker 2: making the story, and you gotta fucking deliver. And by
Speaker 2: when you have to deliver, you might have to have
Speaker 2: some You're gonna all these ideas you came up with
Speaker 2: on a pitch of right, meet my dad, you.
Speaker 3: Have to go fucking do that, right you completely Oh
Speaker 3: thank god, yes, you completely get it. So basically, yeah,
Speaker 3: when I sold the idea to iHeart, was like, oh, like,
Speaker 3: I have my father, he's a con man and you know,
Speaker 3: we haven't spoken in twenty four years. And they're like,
Speaker 3: all right, well, how do you turn that into like,
Speaker 3: you know, X amount of episodes?
Speaker 1: So I was like, oh, I'll do this, I'll.
Speaker 3: Do that, and then it's like, but then you have
Speaker 3: to be as vulnerable as possible and do it and
Speaker 3: you actually go through with it.
Speaker 2: You do because that's the content, man, Like, you got
Speaker 2: to do it for people have invested in you now,
Speaker 2: and when you pitch these things, you were like, they're
Speaker 2: kind of pie in the sky and it's even if
Speaker 2: it was actually kind of really happening, you felt like,
Speaker 2: this is a good thing that I do want to happen.
Speaker 2: You're like, there's just something about pitching an episode where
Speaker 2: you're like, I'll find my dad and talk sit down
Speaker 2: and talk with them that you're like, I don't really
Speaker 2: have to do it, even though you will if you
Speaker 2: do this. I've done that. Like I had a show
Speaker 2: called not Safe on Comedy Central and it was about
Speaker 2: sex and dating and we were fucking running out of ideas.
Speaker 2: I don't even think we were running out. It was
Speaker 2: just first season. We really needed to reprove ourselves right,
Speaker 2: and in the writer's room it was pitched. I had
Speaker 2: done this one thing that was really funny where I
Speaker 2: interviewed my best guy friends and asked them if they
Speaker 2: want to have sex with me, and then a lie
Speaker 2: detector would determined, like if we really were just you know,
Speaker 2: it was really funny and it came out great, and
Speaker 2: they go, what else can we do with a lie detector?
Speaker 2: And my writers go, why don't we have your parents
Speaker 2: in and you ask them about their sex life? And
Speaker 2: I'm like, on paper, that is hilarious, that's so funny.
Speaker 2: That's a home run. And it was. But it was
Speaker 2: the most uncomfortable thing I've ever done. I hated it
Speaker 2: so much and I I honestly regret doing it because
Speaker 2: it's like just made some tension between me and my parents.
Speaker 2: So it's I kind of sacrifice something and doing that,
Speaker 2: I mean, you reconnect with your sister. I don't want
Speaker 2: to give too many but like there's so much to head.
Speaker 2: There's only three episodes out now when do they come out?
Speaker 3: So every Monday a new episode comes out from now
Speaker 3: till August fifth is when the number.
Speaker 2: One Dad, Number one Dad. This is such a summer
Speaker 2: podcast to like binge on a road trip if you
Speaker 2: have like a fun family vacation coming up and you're like,
Speaker 2: what is a podcast that we as a family can
Speaker 2: consume together? And uh, a broken family, a broken well
Speaker 2: anything great your family is because of how broken yours
Speaker 2: is do you here's my I mean, we have so
Speaker 2: much to get into, and but right out of the gate,
Speaker 2: I'm just like it's as if I'm running into you
Speaker 2: at the cellar and I just listened to this, and
Speaker 2: I'm like, I just have to get all my questions
Speaker 2: out of the way right now because you have to
Speaker 2: go down and do a set or something. But feeling
Speaker 2: this urgency, do you like uh with you? Oh god,
Speaker 2: now I forgot my question. Uh are you like do
Speaker 2: you hate cons Like do you hate when you trick people?
Speaker 2: Do you hate feeling like you're being conned?
Speaker 1: Like?
Speaker 2: Is this made because your dad did this and it
Speaker 2: was the reason for the suffering of a relationship? Like
Speaker 2: is that something that is like, uh, you like panic
Speaker 2: about when it happens to you in real life?
Speaker 1: Now?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I'm pretty aware of like like situations,
Speaker 3: so I feel like I'm like, I'm always thinking that
Speaker 3: somebody's not telling the truth. So if anything, it's kind
Speaker 3: of put it like a bad taste in my mouth
Speaker 3: in a sense of like not trusting people. But as
Speaker 3: far as like, oh if I see somebody doing something dishonest,
Speaker 3: I'm you know, I'm definitely like, just like all right,
Speaker 3: this is not my kind of person, or like this
Speaker 3: person's bullshitting and I'm like all right, you know. I
Speaker 3: mean we see it all the time with you know
Speaker 3: in comedy where someone's like giving somebody a hug and
Speaker 3: it's like, meanwhile, you talk shit about that person, you know,
Speaker 3: five minutes ago. So it's like, all right, that's not real.
Speaker 3: So it's like I already like don't like that person, and.
Speaker 2: I will clock those people.
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly, I clock them.
Speaker 3: I never say it to their faith, but I'm like, oh, whatever,
Speaker 3: you're not You're not my kind of person.
Speaker 2: I do the same. And I am one to talk
Speaker 2: shit and then be nice to someone. Oh. I do
Speaker 2: it all the time, not because I and I don't
Speaker 2: feel good about doing it, because I really am trying
Speaker 2: to be someone who doesn't talk shit. Yes, have you
Speaker 2: even heard of this in the comedy community? Like this
Speaker 2: was first brought up to me by a comic that
Speaker 2: was like, I don't really gossip because I was like
Speaker 2: trying to talk shit about someone that would be fun
Speaker 2: to just write off on, and he goes, I don't really.
Speaker 2: I don't like to talk about people that I wouldn't
Speaker 2: like say these things to their face, and I was like,
Speaker 2: what is what are you?
Speaker 3: Like?
Speaker 2: It was, but I then I explored it more and
Speaker 2: I'm like, no, this in my research, this is the
Speaker 2: pathway to being the most happy person.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I mean you give off so this energy when like
Speaker 3: you're talking about somebody, and it's like that energy could
Speaker 3: just be used in such a different way and so
Speaker 3: much more positive to your own stuff. It's instinct. But
Speaker 3: I was like, that's how I grew up. Like I
Speaker 3: grew up with like we're always talking, We're always talking shit.
Speaker 3: Your friends are always talking shit. So it's like then
Speaker 3: when you get to like comedy and it's like, you know,
Speaker 3: there's a competitive thing going on.
Speaker 1: You're always talking.
Speaker 2: Shit always and it's only about some who's doing better
Speaker 2: than you. It's like rare. It's it's it's rare that
Speaker 2: you're like almost punching down in comedy. I feel like
Speaker 2: it's generally when someone is like having a moment, that's
Speaker 2: what everyone gets real chatty about them. It's just it's
Speaker 2: so transparent to me. That's why I like to shit
Speaker 2: on people when they're down, to really make it seem
Speaker 2: like I really didn't like them all the time.
Speaker 3: Well, it's like you're not reading you're not reading your comments.
Speaker 3: But like some people would just like you know, comment
Speaker 3: on like a special and be like that's not funny.
Speaker 3: Where it's like, hey, like you could. You're definitely entitled
Speaker 3: to your opinion. One you also don't have.
Speaker 1: To write it.
Speaker 3: But it's like you see people laughing at you know,
Speaker 3: our specials, like, clearly it is funny, you know there
Speaker 3: They might not, you might not find it, but a
Speaker 3: majority does see it as funny.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's I mean, I hate to say that anyone
Speaker 2: who comments something negative is jealous, but they are, and
Speaker 2: they might be right in what they're saying. They might
Speaker 2: genuinely think you're not funny, but essentially they're jealous that
Speaker 2: you took a chance to do something that kind of
Speaker 2: maybe didn't work out and they'll never have the balls
Speaker 2: to do that, and that's what they hate about it.
Speaker 2: So they have to shit on it to then justify
Speaker 2: why they don't do it, because then people would shoot
Speaker 2: on me, like people like me, So that's why they
Speaker 2: do it. Okay, Well we have to take a break,
Speaker 2: but I'm going to come back and I have so
Speaker 2: many more questions about your podcast and and we'll just
Speaker 2: talk in general. I haven't caught up with you in
Speaker 2: so long. You're a father now since I last like
Speaker 2: ran into you, and so much to talk about with
Speaker 2: Gary Veeter, the star and host and producer of Number
Speaker 2: one Dad, which is a new podcast out. You should
Speaker 2: doubled it right now. We'll be right back Gary. You're
Speaker 2: a father now?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 2: How I mean, how old is your kid? Because I
Speaker 2: feel like the last time I saw you you were
Speaker 2: guys were pregnant. Was it was pre pandemic?
Speaker 1: Right, yeah, it was just that the start of the pandemic.
Speaker 3: So June twentieth, June twentieth, June June third, twenty twenty
Speaker 3: is when.
Speaker 1: She had the baby.
Speaker 3: Okay, the baby and then so we have one we
Speaker 3: actually have an we had another one since as well.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Really yeah yeah, so we have two two boys.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, and your your son and that's your oldest
Speaker 2: son is Sully Sully.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Do you think about the pilot often when you think
Speaker 2: of that name, like, you know, so up for you.
Speaker 3: My wife Ali heard grandfather's middle name was Sullivan, and
Speaker 3: then we're like, oh, that's like a cool name. And
Speaker 3: then you're like, oh, then the Pilot and then you're
Speaker 3: like all right, and then the monsters inc and you're
Speaker 3: like all right. So she's like part Irish and I
Speaker 3: was like, Oh, let's just do it. Let's throw it
Speaker 3: in that movie Help with College and.
Speaker 2: Guess what Sully is was a cool guy? That guy
Speaker 2: if she's.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he did save those people. So it was like,
Speaker 1: if he crashed, we probably still would have named him Sully.
Speaker 2: But yeah, he's just like a cool cultural icon and
Speaker 2: and the rest of his life, your son's life, when
Speaker 2: he gets people being like were you named up with
Speaker 2: the Pilot like that, it's only going to be a
Speaker 2: select amount of people, like people that were born. Gen
Speaker 2: Z doesn't know who Sully Sullenberger is. I don't think
Speaker 2: you know, Like it was just a so it'll be
Speaker 2: a I like when something is someone's name and only
Speaker 2: a few people know and they get it throughout their life,
Speaker 2: but it's not constant.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I like it.
Speaker 3: Like his name is cool, especially like right now he's
Speaker 3: like the only kid in one of his any of
Speaker 3: his class. He's only one class, but like his class
Speaker 3: that has that name, and we haven't like really met
Speaker 3: anybody with that name.
Speaker 1: So I like.
Speaker 2: That that's really good. What's your other kid's name?
Speaker 1: His name's Tyson.
Speaker 2: He's Bladon.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we went outside the box for that and.
Speaker 2: This actually where did that come from?
Speaker 3: So we had my wife and we used to have
Speaker 3: a dog walking business together back in yeah, like pre pandemic,
Speaker 3: and our favorite dog was named Tyson. So we were like, oh,
Speaker 3: let's like and we just like like that name so much,
Speaker 3: so we're like, all right, whatever, let's go with that.
Speaker 1: And we wanted another name that like a lot of
Speaker 1: kids don't have. Oh god, So yeah, really cool.
Speaker 2: I love that your kid was named after a dog, like,
Speaker 2: you know, like because it's funny. First of all, that's
Speaker 2: a hilarious reason. Yeah, and uh, it's it's sweet because
Speaker 2: it means that animals mean so much to us, like
Speaker 2: it was. I just love everything about that and the
Speaker 2: fact that you and your wife obviously knew tons of
Speaker 2: dogs and that dog was super special. What was so
Speaker 2: special about that dog?
Speaker 3: Well, he was a puggle and we wound up getting
Speaker 3: puggles after that too, Like you talk so much.
Speaker 2: So it's just like fine, ad As Tyson are.
Speaker 1: Well, we like are we?
Speaker 3: I mean we love ours but like but at the
Speaker 3: same time, Like he was so cool and he was chill,
Speaker 3: and we would always like watch him and you'd like
Speaker 3: stay over our house.
Speaker 1: So he was awesome.
Speaker 3: And then uh, and then I mean we also like
Speaker 3: the name because like Mike Tyson, you know, like it's cool,
Speaker 3: so it gives you like a toughness and so cool,
Speaker 3: and he's like he kind of lives up to like
Speaker 3: you know, it's funny. It's like you do take on
Speaker 3: your name a little bit, like like Gary is the
Speaker 3: worst name. I hate it so much, but it's like
Speaker 3: I have adapted to it now. Yeah, now it's coming
Speaker 3: back your whole life.
Speaker 2: No last year, I think it's like now it's like
Speaker 2: because it was kind of not a cool name, it
Speaker 2: is cool.
Speaker 1: That's weird, right.
Speaker 3: I kind of feel like there are like times that
Speaker 3: are changing with it a little bit so, but like
Speaker 3: I'll definitely never get too cool.
Speaker 1: I know that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it keeps you humble. You can't you can't ever
Speaker 2: get That's so true. What the fuck names do really
Speaker 2: define you? Tyson is such a great one and so
Speaker 2: is solely good job with those. I mean, this whole
Speaker 2: podcast is exploring your relationship with your father. Now you're
Speaker 2: a father, and you're like reflecting and comparing the experiences
Speaker 2: and you're having sure your wife with who I love
Speaker 2: your wife on the podcast, she so shows it. She's
Speaker 2: so cool and comfortable. Isn't it so infuriating when the
Speaker 2: people your wife doesn't do comedy first, no living or
Speaker 2: anything of course, and she's like so natural, and you're like,
Speaker 2: what the fuck? I try so hard at this?
Speaker 1: I know.
Speaker 3: I think it's like the not trying and it's just like, yeah,
Speaker 3: not caring, and like I feel like like she and
Speaker 3: like other people like when I when I talk to
Speaker 3: my sisters, like they don't really know what like a
Speaker 3: podcast is, like, yeah, you're being recorded as you talk,
Speaker 3: but they don't think about it and they just like
Speaker 3: go and they wound up all being good voices. And
Speaker 3: my wife especially like this is the way that she sounds.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they all are great because I think you're right,
Speaker 2: because we obviously know from doing stand up for so
Speaker 2: long that the way to be truly great is when
Speaker 2: you break through and you're kind of able to be
Speaker 2: yourself on stage or at least relaxed right and not
Speaker 2: be like I'm performing, And they they have that naturally
Speaker 2: because they don't give a fuck because there's the stakes
Speaker 2: aren't high for them because of the nature of it
Speaker 2: being an audio thing. I mean, I'm sure if your
Speaker 2: wife was on camera it would be a little bit
Speaker 2: you know, totally that could but you can kind of
Speaker 2: forget the records there, and so she's just so natural
Speaker 2: where as you You're also amazing on it, there's no
Speaker 2: question about it. But like I'm just you know, projecting
Speaker 2: that I when I know him being on a podcast,
Speaker 2: even if it's like a conversation in the car, I'm
Speaker 2: kind of on in a way.
Speaker 3: Yeah, well we were, like you know, some of our
Speaker 3: conversations they do go on in the car. They're going
Speaker 3: like we're kind of on like the move while I'm
Speaker 3: doing the podcast, so you know, I'm hitting record, like
Speaker 3: we're on my way to my mom's house to talk
Speaker 3: about my father we haven't spoken about in twenty four years,
Speaker 3: and Ali's in the car and then so I'm getting
Speaker 3: like the real time like interaction, and I'm like, I
Speaker 3: want her to say certain things, but I also want
Speaker 3: it to I need to say, like listen. So You're like,
Speaker 3: but it is we're going there to talk to him,
Speaker 3: and you kind of want to.
Speaker 2: Apply wild scene. Okay, So Gary had not talked to
Speaker 2: his mom about his dad, who he's who he was
Speaker 2: stranged from since he was fifteen, hasn't spoken to his
Speaker 2: dad and since then, but hasn't spoken about his dad
Speaker 2: to his mom since then.
Speaker 1: Either, correct? Nothing.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so we have not even mentioned his name, mentioned
Speaker 3: his names, no, like never like looked at a picture
Speaker 3: and been like, oh, this is a picture of you
Speaker 3: and your dad.
Speaker 2: It's like watching a TV show and there's like a
Speaker 2: dad on it. Do you get do you turn off
Speaker 2: like a sex scene, Like I'm.
Speaker 1: Not watching TV with my mom ever?
Speaker 3: Okay, okay, but if we yes, if we if we were,
Speaker 3: it would just be like not even hard. Yeah, it
Speaker 3: would be awkward and not even talked about, Like oh yeah,
Speaker 3: if you see a father playing catch with his son,
Speaker 3: it's like the first thing you're thinking about is that is.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so you're look over there a bird? Yeah, like
Speaker 2: anything that's not because that is that's so wild to
Speaker 2: me that you But that's I mean, that's like family
Speaker 2: dynamics when there's a lot of shit going on. Is
Speaker 2: do we get into what went went on out? Like
Speaker 2: I know your dad was a con man and lied
Speaker 2: for a living literally and could not not lie and
Speaker 2: just seems to have had that kind of personality disorder. Yeah,
Speaker 2: that he was not struggling with because he's probably also
Speaker 2: a narcissist, so they don't struggle with it. But it's
Speaker 2: also something that's made him a strange from his family
Speaker 2: and kind of is a fucked up thing to have.
Speaker 2: Even though he'll probably never understand that was there, there's
Speaker 2: other things at play though that led to you never
Speaker 2: talking to him again. Correct.
Speaker 3: Oh, yeah, so we do get into those and it's like,
Speaker 3: you know, in the beginning, it was very much like
Speaker 3: an attack. It seemed like my mom and that were
Speaker 3: like physical but like verbal that they would get into
Speaker 3: and things were like so bad. It's like the house
Speaker 3: you're growing up, you know, up in, and you're you're
Speaker 3: just witnessing, like these two people go at it and
Speaker 3: it's like, you know, parents fight, but the way that
Speaker 3: they would argue was like they would It became a
Speaker 3: thing where the kids are getting involved, and then eventually
Speaker 3: like we're involved in a sense where my father started
Speaker 3: doing stuff to manipulate the situation with my mom and
Speaker 3: the divorce, so like he could get an upper hand
Speaker 3: and he would take things out on us in like
Speaker 3: certain ways, which I'll get into.
Speaker 1: Yeah it is.
Speaker 3: It's like, you know, it's not good stuff where you're like,
Speaker 3: if you're a dad who like loves his kids, you know,
Speaker 3: part of being a dad is being selfless. It's like
Speaker 3: you know, you put your kids in, you know, before yourself,
Speaker 3: and he didn't seem like that was you know what
Speaker 3: he had, Like those were never his intentions and he
Speaker 3: really you know pushed us away and eventually not only me,
Speaker 3: but my sisters and of course my mom.
Speaker 1: You know, just cut them off.
Speaker 2: God, that's so fucking rough because it does sound like
Speaker 2: he I mean, have you diagnosed him within this?
Speaker 1: You know?
Speaker 3: So it's it's hard because like there's a lot of
Speaker 3: stuff like I couldn't like get into just because of
Speaker 3: like legal stuff. So it's like you know, yeah, like
Speaker 3: you know, so you could say like yeah, you know,
Speaker 3: I could be like, oh yeah, he's a sociopath or
Speaker 3: you know he's you know, narcissists and things like that,
Speaker 3: and like he is. I mean, like that's you know,
Speaker 3: it really goes without like you don't need like uh,
Speaker 3: you know, some like somebody with like a degree to
Speaker 3: like tell you that, like I could you know, you
Speaker 3: just see it. It's like everything he did he love lying,
Speaker 3: he loved to scam, and that's kind of just how
Speaker 3: he lived his life. And he you know, his goal
Speaker 3: was it seemed like maybe it was to like benefit
Speaker 3: the family with his lives, but if we got hurt
Speaker 3: in the process, like you know, it didn't mean anything
Speaker 3: to him.
Speaker 1: It just it just came with the territory.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, yeah, the things he did to benefit the
Speaker 2: family could look like it was benefiting the family, but
Speaker 2: ultimately just him because benefiting the family was probably benefiting him.
Speaker 2: Like these people just operate just like me, me, me,
Speaker 2: and nothing else matters.
Speaker 1: And we're around that a lot. Yeah, we're around that
Speaker 1: a lot.
Speaker 3: Obviously in comedy, like I'm part of being a comedian,
Speaker 3: you have to be very selfish. I mean, like you
Speaker 3: are going to be putting your family to the side
Speaker 3: because like, hey, to do this, you have to you
Speaker 3: have to figure out ways to where you could do it,
Speaker 3: and you're going to miss out on different events and
Speaker 3: things like that. And I think like with my dad
Speaker 3: being a con man, it was kind of like the
Speaker 3: same thing. But when you have a family, you do
Speaker 3: have to make that take like you know, priority.
Speaker 2: God, that is That's the reason I just don't want
Speaker 2: kids is because I just think i'll sent them from
Speaker 2: for making me do things for them that I want
Speaker 2: to do for myself, or I just feel bad because
Speaker 2: I'll be selfish and I won't do the thing that
Speaker 2: they would be better for them because I just want
Speaker 2: it my way. And it's it's just like a thing
Speaker 2: I know about myself that I just don't. I don't
Speaker 2: I won't enjoy naps as much if I know there's
Speaker 2: like a little kid that would want to be playing
Speaker 2: with me, and so I'll take the nap and neglect
Speaker 2: the kid, but I won't even enjoy the nap.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, these are the things I'm thinking about.
Speaker 3: Like, and that's totally good. That's good that you think
Speaker 3: about that, because there are people that then go through
Speaker 3: with it and then then they have this like bad feeling.
Speaker 3: So you know, it really depends what you want and
Speaker 3: maybe that changes, but like, but yeah, it's totally understandable.
Speaker 3: It's like, you don't you do you don't want to
Speaker 3: put somebody in a position where it's like, oh, now
Speaker 3: maybe they don't like you because you're not spending time.
Speaker 3: But it's like you're but yes, when you become a parent,
Speaker 3: you have a responsibility, and it's like that's got to
Speaker 3: be what you know takes the forefront.
Speaker 2: It's crazy, and you say, you even say, I love
Speaker 2: how you say that. Your dad always said to you
Speaker 2: you'll understand when you get older, and you're like, I'm
Speaker 2: older and I don't get it because now you're a father,
Speaker 2: and the idea of doing the things that your dad
Speaker 2: did for sure to you And the fact that I
Speaker 2: forget where I saw this club maybe was on we
Speaker 2: might be drunk or something where and you'll probably cover
Speaker 2: it in the show. But your dad wouldn't even introduce
Speaker 2: He wasn't even your dad. He would be a photographer
Speaker 2: and you would be a sports illustrated reporter that were
Speaker 2: just together.
Speaker 3: Why would you guys be like so yeah, so I mean,
Speaker 3: like the biggest con that we did dah, yeah exactly.
Speaker 2: Because it's a chaperone anyway for sure.
Speaker 3: Agent yeah, oh exactly. It made no sense. My dad,
Speaker 3: he just levet the lie. So yeah, the biggest con
Speaker 3: we had was going to Madison Square Garden as a
Speaker 3: sports illociat for kids, reported me and then he would
Speaker 3: go as my photographer, but he wouldn't say that he
Speaker 3: was my dad.
Speaker 2: He was your photography.
Speaker 1: God. Yeah, and then but.
Speaker 3: So he would do this and it's like why he
Speaker 3: would he would present himself as a photographer of a
Speaker 3: different last name to me, who was just this random
Speaker 3: kid this I guess like genius reporter that's like nine
Speaker 3: ten years old that could.
Speaker 2: Just feel what though you don't even have to be
Speaker 2: good when you're like being touted as this like kids
Speaker 2: order Like I was kind of thinking, like what if
Speaker 2: Gary wasn't good at it? And it's like it doesn't matter.
Speaker 2: The kids are always not good, Like everyone just gives
Speaker 2: them the benefit of the doubt. Would you get nervous
Speaker 2: about interviewing these people? Was this something you wanted or
Speaker 2: was your dad kind of like, no, you're going to
Speaker 2: do this?
Speaker 3: And then I wanted it. I wanted it because I
Speaker 3: wanted to go to the games. I wanted to see
Speaker 3: the I wanted to see for myself. It was never
Speaker 3: a thing where we were like getting caught because I
Speaker 3: was with my dad. He just kind of seemed invincible,
Speaker 3: So I was along for the ride. But I would
Speaker 3: get nervous. But it's like one of those things where
Speaker 3: it kind of taught me early on to like be
Speaker 3: around people that are like higher up where you're like, oh,
Speaker 3: I felt what it was like to be nervous in
Speaker 3: front of them, and I was like, all right, well,
Speaker 3: in the future, when I am around people who are
Speaker 3: like famous or you know, high up, I don't have
Speaker 3: to be nervous. So it kind of like gave me
Speaker 3: that edge in a way. Oh but so that's like
Speaker 3: I guess perhaps to my dad in that sense, but
Speaker 3: like putting me in these.
Speaker 2: Situations used to it, or because I saw like like
Speaker 2: they're that impressive or like they're kind of just humans.
Speaker 3: You got, Yeah, you got what you got used to it,
Speaker 3: so you know it's like bombing on stage, It's like,
Speaker 3: all right, that's what that feels like. So it's like, oh,
Speaker 3: this is what it feels like to be nervous in
Speaker 3: front of Michael Jordan, that's like the biggest person you
Speaker 3: could meet ever.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you asked him what his favorite food was.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because I'm just a good question.
Speaker 2: I think, cute question, Like no one was asking him that.
Speaker 2: Listen to the podcast to find out what Michael Jordan said.
Speaker 2: But yeah, I think that's a good point. I get. Really,
Speaker 2: I think I'm so cool most of the time and
Speaker 2: have a lot of control over my nervous system for
Speaker 2: the most part, until I get to meet someone that
Speaker 2: I'm really like is so famous, and I kind of
Speaker 2: I start shaking something you met with no yes, but
Speaker 2: before I was like a huge fan. But I met
Speaker 2: her boyfriend Travis Kelcey, and I found that my teeth
Speaker 2: were chattering, like literally, like it was so embarrassing and
Speaker 2: it and I was filming a thing with him and
Speaker 2: on camera I was fine, and then having like him
Speaker 2: just being like where are oh, where are you from
Speaker 2: in Ohio? I couldn't remember the city I was from,
Speaker 2: and my teeth were chattering because of just his you know,
Speaker 2: he's a big deal for sure, but his proximity to
Speaker 2: her rendered me almost like I was having a stroke,
Speaker 2: Like I was felt trapped in my body and like
Speaker 2: abandoned by my body, and in a way that I
Speaker 2: was like, I don't want to do this anymore, like
Speaker 2: this isn't this isn't a good look. I don't like
Speaker 2: to feel out of control. So have you met famous
Speaker 2: people now, and you like, what's what's your tip for
Speaker 2: I guess just doing you just said, just do it
Speaker 2: a bunch.
Speaker 3: Yeah I get I know, yeah, do it a bunch,
Speaker 3: But yeah, I guess just like try and act normal.
Speaker 3: And I mean, here's the thing. When I was when
Speaker 3: you're a kid, it's like there's so much more warm
Speaker 3: to you. So it's like as you know, as an adult,
Speaker 3: unless you know, they know what you do, and then
Speaker 3: it's like, oh hey, what's going on. So it's just
Speaker 3: try and just be as normal as you did.
Speaker 2: America's Got Talent. Yeah, we're the judges, and you went
Speaker 2: pretty far right.
Speaker 3: Yeah, finals went to the finals and then Howard Stern,
Speaker 3: Howie Mandel, Heidi Klum and Melbay and then Nick Cannon
Speaker 3: was like the major d or whatever.
Speaker 2: Yeah, was he cool to you?
Speaker 1: He was cool? He was really cool.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's really cool. I like him a lot. I
Speaker 2: just did the thing on the Mass Singer and I
Speaker 2: was just impressed at how nice he was.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm very professional, like yeah, crazy, there's there's no
Speaker 3: one not an easy job. Like you know when he
Speaker 3: when he was on America's Got Talent, Like I was
Speaker 3: just like watching like all the stuff that they made him,
Speaker 3: you know, go through and like just like you know,
Speaker 3: reading a telepromter's not the easiest thing, and like you
Speaker 3: know he's nailing it, like yeah, and I'm just that's
Speaker 3: the stuff where you're like, oh, that's super impressive.
Speaker 2: When you did that show? Did they was it just
Speaker 2: they call like your you heard from your agent? So
Speaker 2: there was auditions and they're like send a tape or
Speaker 2: did someone come to a show?
Speaker 3: What was so somebody, I guess some like producer got
Speaker 3: like my cone in set and they're like, oh, you
Speaker 3: could come down and like do an audition, and they
Speaker 3: put me right in front of like the actual judges
Speaker 3: on like the first thing. So yeah, so I got lucky.
Speaker 3: I got like bypassed of like any like actual like
Speaker 3: senten tape yea. And then from there then I was
Speaker 3: just able to like advance, but like I had no
Speaker 3: idea like the situation and it they really put I
Speaker 3: mean you did I mean last comic and I don't
Speaker 3: know if it was the same thing where they had
Speaker 3: us waiting in like this room for like hours and
Speaker 3: then finally you would go and do your audition and
Speaker 3: like you're like drained.
Speaker 2: Because it's like you're geat with comics at mine.
Speaker 1: You were so much better Paris.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, exact, and I'm like, oh this par
Speaker 3: you know, he'll go on before me and then Fanned.
Speaker 2: And yeah ventral Quiss. Yeah, it's what a wild thing.
Speaker 2: So you would be there for hours and then by
Speaker 2: the time you go up.
Speaker 3: You're hoping that that Yeah, and I remember that audition
Speaker 3: that I did was like the crowd was like two
Speaker 3: pm at the New Jersey Performing Arts Center in Newark,
Speaker 3: and You're like, oh, this is a great comedy audience.
Speaker 3: But luckily it's like I think you only had to
Speaker 3: do like sixty seconds the first time, so I'm like,
Speaker 3: so hopefully this is like, you know, good, and and
Speaker 3: then it did go great and so uh yeah, I
Speaker 3: was able to advance.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's was that. Uh did that was that a
Speaker 2: big career moment for you? Like did you feel like
Speaker 2: things picked up?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Things got where it's like got an agent out of
Speaker 3: it and then the manager and then yeah, so.
Speaker 2: You recognize from it.
Speaker 3: Sometimes where it's like, you know, now they've had so
Speaker 3: many seasons where it all blends in.
Speaker 2: I mean, but it wasn't that long. When were you
Speaker 2: on I say twenty yeah, okay, but I that is
Speaker 2: I guess that is long enough that people could like forget,
Speaker 2: but people can watch you. Like I had a pop
Speaker 2: after the Tom Brady Rose because my face was everywhere
Speaker 2: for like two days. It was really insane, and so
Speaker 2: I was getting recognized all the time, and it was like, oh,
Speaker 2: this is just a new part of my life. It
Speaker 2: fucking falls off.
Speaker 1: So it does, oh completely, well.
Speaker 2: Aren't seeing your face regularly when they look at you
Speaker 2: at Starbucks, They're just they don't put it together. It
Speaker 2: might have a flicker of a thing, but it's I was,
Speaker 2: you know, both like a little bit disheartened and also
Speaker 2: so happy to go back to the way it was
Speaker 2: almost instantly, but also to realize, like, okay, I could
Speaker 2: I can't even have a bigger pop than that, Like
Speaker 2: this might be as big as it gets, and like
Speaker 2: that's good and it's nice to know what it feels
Speaker 2: like to have that other thing. But it's it kind
Speaker 2: of just reminded me of just there's just too much
Speaker 2: stuff and our retention spans so much long enough, and
Speaker 2: it's just a different world we're operating in and I
Speaker 2: don't even know sometimes like what the point of it
Speaker 2: all is. I question that of like do you feel
Speaker 2: a new sense of like artistic accomplishment though, and doing
Speaker 2: this kind of like docu series podcast. I mean, yeah,
Speaker 2: so outside of what we do.
Speaker 3: I so yeah, So I think like in that sense
Speaker 3: because it's different than like, you know, we're in this
Speaker 3: comedy world where it's like, all right, we're going to
Speaker 3: do stand up and here's a special and then that's cool.
Speaker 3: But like this is just some shows, like another creative side.
Speaker 3: So I was like cool to like to me, that's
Speaker 3: cool to like just show that.
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, this is fun to do.
Speaker 3: And I really I'm happy with like how so far,
Speaker 3: like with how it's going, and yeah, I hope like
Speaker 3: people are excited, like as each episode, you know, I've
Speaker 3: just gone.
Speaker 2: Pumped for the rest. Like I zip through them today,
Speaker 2: all the first three this morning, and I thought there
Speaker 2: was just three because it didn't say like of three
Speaker 2: of ten. So I was like, oh, this is okay.
Speaker 2: I guess we're only finishing this in three twenty four
Speaker 2: minute episodes. Okay, well good, And then I'm like, he
Speaker 2: hasn't met his dad yet, but the fuck. So I'm
Speaker 2: so excited to hear there were more, and I'm so
Speaker 2: excited to listen to the rest of it again. It's
Speaker 2: called Number one Dad. It's on wherever you get your podcasts.
Speaker 2: iHeart Radio and Big Money Players back with more after
Speaker 2: this with Gary Peter. Gary. Are you on the road
Speaker 2: right now too?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 3: So I have a bunch of bunch of dates coming well,
Speaker 3: definitely coming out, but right now I'm doing like so
Speaker 3: much promo. But in July and August I have like
Speaker 3: some dates and like Albany and Connecticut or landing.
Speaker 2: So many podcasts right now. Oh yeah, it's what number
Speaker 2: is this for you today?
Speaker 3: Actually tell you this is my first one, so good
Speaker 3: to give you more after this, I have to do
Speaker 3: one like a like a it's like a dad's podcast.
Speaker 1: I forget what it's exactly.
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, no, no, no, I'm sorry to put you on
Speaker 2: the spot. I don't know the name of any up
Speaker 2: here on and then I or like the host names
Speaker 2: and I'm I'm trying to look on zoom and be like, oh,
Speaker 2: I shouldn't. I should have researched this before. When you
Speaker 2: going through press, it's like one after the other and uh,
Speaker 2: it's it's pretty insane, but it's this podcast is going
Speaker 2: to I mean my boyfriend even I told him you
Speaker 2: were gonna be on the show, and he didn't know
Speaker 2: your name from the show, but then I described your story,
Speaker 2: He's like, oh, yeah, I saw that ad too. So
Speaker 2: it's getting goods and everyone's algorithm.
Speaker 1: It's amazing with the pants. I mean, this is so.
Speaker 3: I mean, like you asked me about like as far
Speaker 3: as like from a creative standpoint, I'm like, I like,
Speaker 3: I'm like happy with it, like it's doing. I'm surprised
Speaker 3: that people like it for read like they like it
Speaker 3: for different reasons.
Speaker 1: They like it.
Speaker 3: You know, if you come from a good family, you
Speaker 3: might like it just because you're seeing what a band
Speaker 3: family is what we talked about, or if like some
Speaker 3: people are like, oh, I haven't talked to my sister
Speaker 3: in ten years, like and now hearing like you go
Speaker 3: through that, you know, it really like wants me to
Speaker 3: like reach out to her.
Speaker 1: Think so it's like talk to misters and how long
Speaker 1: it was six years for me? Yes?
Speaker 2: Whoa, So she hadn't seen the birth of your son
Speaker 2: and you had kind of missed down on her kids' lives. Yes,
Speaker 2: as well, And she said that she it was really sweet.
Speaker 2: She you call her you tell her you're doing the podcast.
Speaker 2: Was there a part of you that was gonna be like, oh,
Speaker 2: so now you're reaching out because you have a podcast,
Speaker 2: like that's the only.
Speaker 3: Yeah, sure, yeah, So yeah, she was on board with it.
Speaker 3: So I gave her heads up like that it was
Speaker 3: a podcast, and like, you know, through text we were
Speaker 3: like kind of like settling stuff and then I was
Speaker 3: able to get her to like to record. But yeah,
Speaker 3: you know, it's part of like having a dad that
Speaker 3: it you know, was this person you're just going through
Speaker 3: with it? Hopefully you know there's I mean, there's gonna
Speaker 3: be some damage, but hopefully that these people that you
Speaker 3: know that you cut off in your life, that they
Speaker 3: they you know, want to talk about it and want
Speaker 3: to be a part of it.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean this idea of cutting someone off and like,
Speaker 2: did you think with your sister you'd never speak to
Speaker 2: her again when you decided to do that, or was
Speaker 2: this like, oh, we'll just take up I just need
Speaker 2: to make a stance here. Was that really like something
Speaker 2: until this podcast? Kind of Yeah for you? Did you
Speaker 2: think it was probably like never again?
Speaker 3: I didn't know if it was going to be never again,
Speaker 3: but it was kind of like you said, like like
Speaker 3: just a stance where I know I as far as
Speaker 3: you know, she talked to my dad again. That's the
Speaker 3: whole reason why we cut why I cut her off,
Speaker 3: is because she talked to my dad again. I think
Speaker 3: it was probably I guess it was like twenty seventeen.
Speaker 3: And when I found out. When I found out about it,
Speaker 3: I was like, oh, like, I mean we didn't like
Speaker 3: say we're never talking to him again like as a
Speaker 3: as like a siblings, but it was kind of assumed.
Speaker 3: And then he felt betrayed, and it was I didn't
Speaker 3: want to let him into my life. And I felt
Speaker 3: that if my sister was in my life and I
Speaker 3: was telling her things, then he was going to have
Speaker 3: access to that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't said he would just like show up
Speaker 2: at your guys's, in your guys' lives like would because
Speaker 2: for first, I'm thinking this is an absentee father. He's
Speaker 2: just like lying in business, showing up, using the kids
Speaker 2: when he needs them, but not really meddling in their
Speaker 2: lives much else. Right, But this was a guy that
Speaker 2: would show like your sister's on a date and he
Speaker 2: like just showed up there and like.
Speaker 1: So yeah, he was Florida. I mean he yeah, you
Speaker 1: know Florida.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so you know she was in a completely different state,
Speaker 3: and then you know he he taps her on the shoulder,
Speaker 3: and it's so it's kind of like this thing where
Speaker 3: it's like you always felt like you were being watched,
Speaker 3: even though you know, even though I cut him off
Speaker 3: twenty four you know, for twenty four years, I was like,
Speaker 3: is he in the audience of one of my shows?
Speaker 3: Because this guy could you know, impersonate to anybody?
Speaker 2: Because he'd he you have a recording of him talking
Speaker 2: in Greek. Yes, he speaks French. I guess like he
Speaker 2: just is a shape shifter and so and and that
Speaker 2: that video that you played of him that was from
Speaker 2: like twenty seventeen, that was like in Manhattan, you could
Speaker 2: have just run into him. Was that a thing that
Speaker 2: you thought about throughout your life of like completely what'd
Speaker 2: he be there and have known that you he knows
Speaker 2: your comedian? How could he have Has he tried to
Speaker 2: get in touch with you and get in on some
Speaker 2: of this fame, especially when you've had your pops over
Speaker 2: the years.
Speaker 3: Yeah, So I locked him from like every like type
Speaker 3: of social media to like know that like where, like,
Speaker 3: so he wouldn't be able to kind of track me down.
Speaker 3: But I assume that, you know, it's pretty easy if
Speaker 3: you just google and be like, oh here, you know,
Speaker 3: here's my show schedule, and then you could just.
Speaker 1: Like show up there.
Speaker 3: But uh, but yeah, I was just always in the
Speaker 3: back of my mind, always hoping that he wouldn't do that.
Speaker 2: I could see him just like getting a private table
Speaker 2: at the stand, them really hooking him up. They come
Speaker 2: and he's like, I haven't talked to my son forever.
Speaker 2: They're like, come on in, and then yeah, like at
Speaker 2: a front table. Like he just seems like the kind
Speaker 2: of guy that would do that. But I guess he
Speaker 2: just really knew you did not want to speak to him,
Speaker 2: and that was very very clear.
Speaker 1: And uh, I mean I wouldn't. I mean, who knows.
Speaker 3: As far as I know, he like didn't show up
Speaker 3: and like, but you know, I could also see him
Speaker 3: just showing up and then not saying anything.
Speaker 2: Well what about Okay, so you said you blocked him
Speaker 2: on Facebook, but was there a time that you were
Speaker 2: friends on Facebook? Because if you stopped talking to him
Speaker 2: when you were fifteen, that was pre Facebook, so it.
Speaker 1: Was nocked before like you, like, he even has a chance. Yeah,
Speaker 1: before he even has a chance.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Oh Gary, this is so crazy. What the fuck?
Speaker 2: So you have to I'm guessing you're I'm not going
Speaker 2: to ask you, but I'm guessing you eventually speak to
Speaker 2: him or at least you get pretty fucking close to
Speaker 2: doing it. Were you Was it one of the scariest
Speaker 2: things you've ever done in your life? Embarking on this?
Speaker 2: Was this like one of the hardest things?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Okay?
Speaker 2: Were there moments where you go, what why am I
Speaker 2: doing this?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 3: I mean, let's say straight up, the goal is to
Speaker 3: talk to him, like that is everything. So you know,
Speaker 3: I put that on paper when I like said that
Speaker 3: I was doing this, and I'm like, and you know,
Speaker 3: as you go through the whole process, you're like, all right,
Speaker 3: this is most likely going to happen. I'm like, I'm like,
Speaker 3: am I gonna be ready for it? But part of
Speaker 3: what I'm going through, like you know, talking to my
Speaker 3: sisters and like really trying to re remember the things
Speaker 3: that happened, you know, going to uh speak to my
Speaker 3: mom and like going and talking with therapists and all
Speaker 3: this stuff, and talking to friends too. It like kind
Speaker 3: of trying to build up like the courage to eventually
Speaker 3: talk to him.
Speaker 2: Well, because when you're on the way over to your
Speaker 2: mom's house, so you've never to your mom about your
Speaker 2: dad since you were a strange from him when you
Speaker 2: were fifteen. So you're going over there. Your wife's in
Speaker 2: the car with you, and we were saying how great
Speaker 2: she is, and she's like, so, what are you going
Speaker 2: to say? And you're like, you have. It reminded me
Speaker 2: so much of like how we prepare to do a
Speaker 2: set or something. For me, at least, I'm just like,
Speaker 2: I don't know, I'll figure out when I get there.
Speaker 2: Like when I'm nervous about something, I don't prepare because
Speaker 2: I don't want to think about what I'm about to do.
Speaker 2: It has to happen anyway, so me thinking about it's
Speaker 2: just going to elongate the pain. So you really had
Speaker 2: kind of no plan how to bring up your dad
Speaker 2: for the first time, not just you know, this is
Speaker 2: like the first time he's ever talked about his dad
Speaker 2: with his mom in that long It's like the elephant
Speaker 2: in the room all the time. And you tell her
Speaker 2: I got a podcast. I'm sure she was very pleased
Speaker 2: to hear that, and then you tell her that it's
Speaker 2: about your dad.
Speaker 1: And that is the fun Yes, sound effects, yeah she has,
Speaker 1: like I mean, and she's very dramatic too, so it's
Speaker 1: just like going so going going through it.
Speaker 3: You're like and so you see her face like light
Speaker 3: up that like I tell her that I yes, her
Speaker 3: Bock is like my son, like he's doing something you know,
Speaker 3: maybe well we broke like and then uh, and then
Speaker 3: it's like but you know, the catch is like this,
Speaker 3: you know, terrible thing that happened in our in our lives, and.
Speaker 2: You guys have to listen because there's just a sound
Speaker 2: effect that happens when she finds out it's about the dad,
Speaker 2: and it's just so funny. And you know, if you're
Speaker 2: writing this, you would have put something similar. It's just
Speaker 2: it's there's there's like a record scratch moment. It's so good.
Speaker 2: But I'm I just really in that you really didn't
Speaker 2: know how the fuck you were going to bring it up,
Speaker 2: because how can you prepare You don't.
Speaker 1: Have no idea.
Speaker 3: And I waited, like you know, I I walk into
Speaker 3: my mom's house and I, I mean, the goal is
Speaker 3: to tell her that I'm going to be doing this thing,
Speaker 3: and I it's always been very hard for me to
Speaker 3: ever talk to my mom, like just in general. I'm like,
Speaker 3: it's hard for me to be vulnerable. Why, Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3: It's just whatever I was taught and like this emotion
Speaker 3: that I lack, it's just like it's just grown on me,
Speaker 3: and it's like it makes me it makes it very
Speaker 3: hard to have conversations with her. And this is such
Speaker 3: a serious thing to bring up. And I'm like I'm
Speaker 3: seeing my wife in like the corner of the room,
Speaker 3: like a hour and a half into this like stay
Speaker 3: at my mom's where she is like look at me, like,
Speaker 3: when are you going to say something?
Speaker 2: Well, it's an hour and a half in.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's yeah, it's like an hour and a half in.
Speaker 3: It's like we we just like sat down to like eat,
Speaker 3: and like we're waiting to like I think, like you know,
Speaker 3: we passed bagels or whatever. And then I'm like, I
Speaker 3: guess now's the time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you just you just rip off the band aid.
Speaker 2: Yeah that sounds like how it went now. I mean
Speaker 2: you're someone who I mean, you talk in your stand
Speaker 2: about your personal life, but you're just like a guy
Speaker 2: who kind of keeps like you're just you. I don't
Speaker 2: think of you as you're you're obviously are you comfortable
Speaker 2: talking about your feelings? I mean you go to therapy.
Speaker 2: I remember we were talking about couples therapy. I think
Speaker 2: one of the last conversations before COVID happened where I
Speaker 2: was talking to you about, Uh, you were going to
Speaker 2: couple therapy and that's the woman who shows up on
Speaker 2: your podcast as your therapist too, and what got you
Speaker 2: into therapy? And uh, this seems to be the product
Speaker 2: of a lot of therapy, the idea that you could
Speaker 2: even do this podcast.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I mean couples.
Speaker 3: You know, I did go to one on one I
Speaker 3: saw Alan, which was like that the comics, and that
Speaker 3: was yeah, so I did that.
Speaker 2: So this guy Alan in New York saw every male
Speaker 2: stand up comedian, some females, but usually just for one
Speaker 2: session intertally. H No, I think that, I think pretty much.
Speaker 2: I would say, like, how many so many comics do
Speaker 2: you think this guy sees?
Speaker 3: I mean I would say, oh, I mean yeah, I
Speaker 3: mean I would honestly put it like an over one hundred.
Speaker 2: Like it was everyone.
Speaker 3: It was such a referral base where it's like, oh,
Speaker 3: like you're you know, every comic, like we all have
Speaker 3: something and you know, everybody has something to talk about.
Speaker 3: So you're like, oh, I'm here's my friend who does comedy.
Speaker 3: I respect him, and he's seeing this person. I'm like,
Speaker 3: it seems like he's doing better. I guess, so let
Speaker 3: me go. And you start talking to this guy Alan
Speaker 3: and you're like, oh, he's good.
Speaker 1: Now. Hey. It for me, it didn't work because it.
Speaker 2: Was like it's not one size fits all.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and here's the thing, like my issues were like yes,
Speaker 3: it was so much childhood stuff and like you're trying
Speaker 3: to overcome I mean, I guess everybody's it always goes
Speaker 3: back to your childhood and so you're always trying to
Speaker 3: overcome that. And what really helped was when my wife
Speaker 3: and I started going to a couples counseling, like we're
Speaker 3: having problems.
Speaker 1: We almost got divorce.
Speaker 2: Right, I remember this, and I'm glad you're willing to
Speaker 2: talk about it. What what was your biggest issue? And
Speaker 2: then how did you get past it?
Speaker 1: Well?
Speaker 3: She would say it's me, and I would say it
Speaker 3: was her, but no, but it was like no, I
Speaker 3: would say, like the biggest issue was like we so
Speaker 3: there are a few things. One like all my stuff
Speaker 3: that like all the stuff that I dealt with like
Speaker 3: as a kid, I would bring that bagage into the relationship.
Speaker 3: And then my wife had her own stuff, like she
Speaker 3: she was a big alcoholic. You know, I guess you
Speaker 3: don't have to say big alcoholic. She was an alcoholic.
Speaker 1: She was bigger than most alcoholics.
Speaker 3: But she yeah right, ye did give like I mean
Speaker 3: like she's huge, yeah, out of control.
Speaker 2: And so yeah, okay if she's coming from that, which
Speaker 2: most of us, a lot of us are, yeah, that
Speaker 2: just obviously she has her shit too.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so we both had it and we were just
Speaker 3: trying to like live together without this resentment. She got
Speaker 3: sober and I was sort of like still dealing with
Speaker 3: like my stuff of like just I don't know, and
Speaker 3: were you do drink? I like really slowed down, so
Speaker 3: I'll drink like very you.
Speaker 2: Have a problem. You're not a big ayeah, probbably a
Speaker 2: little one. Okay. So yeah, but that's the thing is
Speaker 2: like you don't have a thing to quit like she Okay,
Speaker 2: she gets into recovery and she's working on her shit.
Speaker 2: And then for people who don't have like an addiction
Speaker 2: to a substance that is really definable, as like this
Speaker 2: is the this is where we start at least and
Speaker 2: then get into stuff you like, don't have anything to quit,
Speaker 2: Like I think so often there are people that don't,
Speaker 2: that aren't drug addicts, that are struggling in life and
Speaker 2: depressed and having all these problems in the relationships, and
Speaker 2: they're like, man, if I only had a twelve step
Speaker 2: program for this thing, that I'm right for sure the
Speaker 2: thing is there. There are those and it's you know,
Speaker 2: it's usually like children of alcoholics or like children of
Speaker 2: there's always some kind of group that you can find.
Speaker 2: But what did you was that does that resonate with
Speaker 2: you that you kind of felt like what is my
Speaker 2: thing totally?
Speaker 1: Or like you just don't you know.
Speaker 3: I was looking at her as like as the one
Speaker 3: who's the only one who had issues in our relationship.
Speaker 3: So you're like seeing it because that was the big
Speaker 3: like red flag, right there was like this person that
Speaker 3: was drinking uncontrollably. But then my wife got sober and
Speaker 3: you know, she's been sober for like nine years already,
Speaker 3: and you're like so yeah, and you're like, oh, like
Speaker 3: then you start looking at like yourself, because like I
Speaker 3: started having you know, like we would get an argument
Speaker 3: still and like or I would have resentment for like
Speaker 3: past stuff.
Speaker 1: Like you have to move on.
Speaker 3: And that's where like couples counseling like really helped, where
Speaker 3: you're like you have to put all the things that
Speaker 3: happened in the past. There's never any like infidelity or anything,
Speaker 3: like you can move past things like how do you
Speaker 3: how do you communicate with one another? And and like
Speaker 3: you know, my wife's on the podcast, like like you said,
Speaker 3: like she does like the way that she presents things.
Speaker 3: She's always very like articulate and like really like could
Speaker 3: like express her feelings and and she's much better at
Speaker 3: that than me.
Speaker 1: And she's really like opened me up.
Speaker 3: And I think like a couple's counseling has really taught
Speaker 3: me like how to like have conversations and really not
Speaker 3: never to go to bed angry, not that sometimes we don't,
Speaker 3: but like you know, we get over our problems pretty quickly.
Speaker 2: Yeah, isn't that what I go to with my boyfriend
Speaker 2: And we've been together off and on for ten years
Speaker 2: and it's very similar, Like we have had many times
Speaker 2: where we go like This could go either way, like
Speaker 2: we could gladly walk away from this and like literally
Speaker 2: essentially divorce and never talk again, or we could just
Speaker 2: try to fix it. And there's been so many times
Speaker 2: where I didn't try to fix it. But I think
Speaker 2: it is about It's always about communication. It's about like
Speaker 2: saying you're upset as soon as you're upset, yes, is
Speaker 2: that like what.
Speaker 1: It boils down to completely?
Speaker 3: And I witness, like, so my wife and I were
Speaker 3: having these problems, and it just all made me think
Speaker 3: of is my parents' marriage, Like I watched them have
Speaker 3: this troubled marriage. I'm like, oh my god, this is
Speaker 3: the last thing I wanted. I never wanted to have
Speaker 3: a marriage that we're like, you're fighting and arguing and.
Speaker 2: You don't bring anything up.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so I was just like a fight. Yeah, completely,
Speaker 3: I would just shut down. So and it just made
Speaker 3: it very hard where I'm like and then so finally,
Speaker 3: but couples counseling was the thing that my father, I remember,
Speaker 3: never wanted to ever go to. And I was like,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna go to this and see if it works,
Speaker 3: and wound up finding like a really great therapist and
Speaker 3: we were able to talk through things.
Speaker 2: I feel like it is such a good thing to
Speaker 2: have completely My boyfriend and I like, he wasn't someone
Speaker 2: that had gone to individual therapy, but he dabbled in
Speaker 2: it but was not like super into it. And after
Speaker 2: our first session, he was like, I think I'm good
Speaker 2: at this, and I'm, yeah, yeah, you are, because you were.
Speaker 2: I'm with you for a reason. You're so intelligent, You're
Speaker 2: curious about yourself, and this is all it is, is
Speaker 2: like kind of peeling back the layers and being just
Speaker 2: curious and being insightful, and it's like it's a cool
Speaker 2: thing to do. And I have never left a session,
Speaker 2: even bad ones. And I'm not gonna promise this for everyone,
Speaker 2: but I would say ninety percent of the time I
Speaker 2: leave our therapy sessions where I think maybe we're going
Speaker 2: in there to break up, and I feel closer to
Speaker 2: him afterwards, and we haven't even resolved things when the
Speaker 2: time is up, Like we leave kind of tense, but
Speaker 2: I feel more connected to him after or we like
Speaker 2: kind of because you can't not get honest in there,
Speaker 2: or at least I can't not get like she gets
Speaker 2: it out of us.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and yeah, you have to have like a certain
Speaker 3: sense of awareness about yourself and then like really just
Speaker 3: bring it out. And usually and maybe a great therapist
Speaker 3: will do that. They'll bring out like these things that
Speaker 3: whatever happened like in the last week, or something that's
Speaker 3: been bothering you or troubling you, and then now you
Speaker 3: both have this awareness about your certain behaviors.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I like, I brought up something ages ago that
Speaker 2: I thought, you know, it's like something he wouldn't even remember,
Speaker 2: because it was just something that I was like, this
Speaker 2: is just an example of the things that I can't
Speaker 2: be with someone who talks like this or says that
Speaker 2: kind of thing. Right, And then there was like that
Speaker 2: was maybe a year and a half ago, and something
Speaker 2: came up like the same thing happened recently, and I
Speaker 2: got the response that I wanted, and I thought, you know,
Speaker 2: maybe he's doing it because he remembers being scolded for
Speaker 2: it in there by me, or maybe he's doing it
Speaker 2: because he realized that's something I need, and he's just
Speaker 2: doing it because I want it. I don't give a shit,
Speaker 2: you know, I don't care what the the impetus is.
Speaker 2: I got what I wanted in that moment, and whether
Speaker 2: it came from a real place where he was like
Speaker 2: I should do this out of the kindness of my heart,
Speaker 2: or like this is what I've been trained to do.
Speaker 2: I don't care when my dog sits and he's I'll
Speaker 2: give him a treat like it's that and not that
Speaker 2: my boyfriend's my dog or whatever. But it's like I
Speaker 2: will still. I don't mind someone being told or just
Speaker 2: feeling like doing you know that whole thing in the
Speaker 2: Jennifer Aniston movie The Breakup where she's like, I want
Speaker 2: you to want to do the dishes. I don't need
Speaker 2: him to want to hug me a little bit longer
Speaker 2: in that moment. I just need longer hugs. That's something
Speaker 2: I'm requesting, and do it and he does it and
Speaker 2: it and I'm so proud of myself for not being like, well,
Speaker 2: you're just doing it because I told you too, Like
Speaker 2: it actually works on me.
Speaker 3: No, it's becomes like a learned behavior that you know
Speaker 3: now he yeah, so when next thing that happens, he
Speaker 3: knows how to respond.
Speaker 1: It's and it's not easy.
Speaker 3: But I also think like as a couple, the greatest
Speaker 3: thing that you have are the things that you've been through,
Speaker 3: and like, if you guys could, like, you know, if
Speaker 3: you overcome certain things like that's that's a badge of
Speaker 3: honor for you as a couple.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like, we almost broke up recently and it was
Speaker 2: like I thought it was, it was maybe one word
Speaker 2: away from being broken up.
Speaker 3: Like at one point, man, this ste Briss is really good. Hey,
Speaker 3: you say, keeps you guys together?
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's well, No, this was we were at dinner.
Speaker 2: This is another thing I recommend if you guys are
Speaker 2: scared out there to go to couples therapy and you
Speaker 2: need to get you guys both need to get some
Speaker 2: stuff out and you need to talk about real shit. Yeah,
Speaker 2: go and you're reasonable people. Go to a restaurant that's
Speaker 2: closing in an hour and a half before you bring
Speaker 2: up this fight. It'll give you. You have to behave yourselves.
Speaker 2: You can't raise your voice if you're you know you're not.
Speaker 2: Don't drink and you kind of go to the Olive
Speaker 2: garden and just wait and then buy clothes. It's kind
Speaker 2: of like the timer for the therapist and you have
Speaker 2: to leave, but it lets you get things out and
Speaker 2: say things and you're in public so it can't get crazy.
Speaker 2: And I really recommend that. So we were at dinner
Speaker 2: and it was like getting pretty bad, and at one
Speaker 2: point we're both like, can't eat. Actually I'm eating just fine,
Speaker 2: but I'm pretending like I can't get so upset even
Speaker 2: though I'm like still, but he's like lost his appetite
Speaker 2: because we're about to break up and I'm still like
Speaker 2: chewing as I'm crying, and but the waitress comes up
Speaker 2: or no, he just goes the way I guess. The
Speaker 2: wait just kind of walked by and he goes, are
Speaker 2: you finished? And I'm like with the relationship, And it
Speaker 2: was at that point where it was like weird and
Speaker 2: I go, I I don't know about I don't know
Speaker 2: about either, and and it was it was, but it
Speaker 2: was it was that close like if I would have
Speaker 2: said yes, it would have been done and it would
Speaker 2: have been over. But instead we kind of got kicked
Speaker 2: out because the restaurant was closing and we had to
Speaker 2: go to this concert right afterwards and meet his friends
Speaker 2: and family, and I were walking in there like raw
Speaker 2: as fuck, just you know, just peeled ourselves apart, just
Speaker 2: got almost or on the precipice of breaking up. But
Speaker 2: for some reason, because we had just gotten super honest,
Speaker 2: and I had said some things that I had been harboring,
Speaker 2: and he said some things that he had been harboring.
Speaker 2: And we both said things that were really hyperbolic and
Speaker 2: kind of crazy, which I liked because he's usually so measured,
Speaker 2: and he said a couple of things that I was like, Oh,
Speaker 2: that's a fucking crazy thing, and I like, they are
Speaker 2: playing my game. I just felt closer to him. I
Speaker 2: don't know why. I felt like we didn't even need to.
Speaker 2: We resolved it later, but there was something about getting
Speaker 2: so stripped down and being so honest, which is something
Speaker 2: we always close out these things and go, hey, we
Speaker 2: just need to be more honest when things cut out there, Like,
Speaker 2: but isn't that so hard? Gary? Final thought? Isn't it
Speaker 2: so hard in a relationship though? To bring up the
Speaker 2: thing when it bugs you in the moment completely? Like
Speaker 2: what do you do to do it?
Speaker 3: I mean some I mean first initially I'm like, I'm
Speaker 3: not going to say this, and then I wind up
Speaker 3: saying the thing that bugs me and then cut it
Speaker 3: could cause a fight. I'm trying to think of like
Speaker 3: a good example of what that is, but you know,
Speaker 3: it could be anything. It could you know, it could
Speaker 3: be the fact that, like, you know, I'll make a
Speaker 3: little noise while I'm sleeping, my wife just hits me
Speaker 3: and wakes me up, and I'm just like, why do
Speaker 3: you fucking do that? Yeah, yeah, you know, but but
Speaker 3: you know, it could just be something and then it
Speaker 3: just spirals. But like usually it's always like something more
Speaker 3: that that you're like you're trying to dive deep into
Speaker 3: like whatever that issue is, and then you know, yeah,
Speaker 3: you got to talk it out.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's it's just that that initial when something is like, oh,
Speaker 2: I'll just let it slide, and then they just pile
Speaker 2: up and you eventually explode. But that is interesting that
Speaker 2: you went the other way, you know, like I feel
Speaker 2: like I've dealt with that in relationships before where and
Speaker 2: my parents were fighters too, like screamers and yellers, and
Speaker 2: I would say stop fighting, and my parents would always say,
Speaker 2: we're not fighting, we're having a discussion. My first joke
Speaker 2: was like, well, when we have a book discussion in
Speaker 2: my fourth grade class, missus Reid doesn't throw a chair,
Speaker 2: you know. I remember making that kind of joke because
Speaker 2: they would always say, like, we're having a discussion. So Anyway,
Speaker 2: I also before we go, I wanted to read some
Speaker 2: of these things to you that I found on Reddit
Speaker 2: last night. It kind of fits exactly with the just
Speaker 2: the idea of being a con person I'm obsessed with.
Speaker 2: Like the there's this book called The Influence of Psychology
Speaker 2: or something like that where it just teaches you how
Speaker 2: to manipulate people very casually by doing and saying things.
Speaker 2: And I don't really utilize the things in it. It's
Speaker 2: kind of like Dale Carnegie. It's just about mental manipulation,
Speaker 2: which is something we as comedians do with our act.
Speaker 2: Like we have the ability now to like queue a
Speaker 2: laughter if we want to, Like, you know, if we
Speaker 2: laugh at our own jokes, we know it makes the
Speaker 2: audience laugh harder if we sprinkle it with fuck. We
Speaker 2: might not even do these things consciously, but subconsciously we
Speaker 2: all are tricking people. Yeah, It's it's rare that you're
Speaker 2: just getting by on the comedy, which is always our goal.
Speaker 2: But anyway, this said on ask credit, what's the best
Speaker 2: psychology trick? You know? And uh, I thought that some
Speaker 2: of these were pretty interesting. I want to ask your
Speaker 2: opinion about it. Okay, so this is from a parent
Speaker 2: asking your kid if he wants three big broccoli or
Speaker 2: six little ones, same portion size. Do you do stuff
Speaker 2: like that with your kids?
Speaker 3: Uh No, but I heard that's the best thing to do.
Speaker 3: Is like you give options and then you know and
Speaker 3: then you you're getting you're getting what you want out
Speaker 3: of that.
Speaker 2: Yes, that's that is what a lot of people said. Oh,
Speaker 2: someone said, well this is one that you can use
Speaker 2: for yourself. Just promise to do three minutes of that
Speaker 2: thing that you were putting off. Usually once you start
Speaker 2: keep going, keeping going as easy. Are you someone who
Speaker 2: procrasts Nate's wildly? Are you?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Well, you know I do procrastinate.
Speaker 3: And then one of the things I try and do
Speaker 3: and it comes from a Seinfeld where Jerry goes. You know,
Speaker 3: I'm thinking about like future Jerry, so like you do
Speaker 3: the thing now. So if I do the thing now,
Speaker 3: then I'm taking in future Gary's like you know, like
Speaker 3: basically person as a personal Yeah, I got to think
Speaker 3: about him.
Speaker 2: Divorce from yourself and make yourself someone I that is
Speaker 2: such a genius thing because I was just thinking about
Speaker 2: I was literally just writing this to my friends talking
Speaker 2: about how I've been depressed lately, and I go the
Speaker 2: only reason I ever do anything is because someone is
Speaker 2: expecting it of me. Like I rarely do something because
Speaker 2: I want it for myself. It's because someone else wants
Speaker 2: it for me. I said, if there was a way
Speaker 2: to make myself someone else right, I would be able
Speaker 2: to get so much more done. And it sounds like
Speaker 2: psychologically that's what you've done with the future, Gary, And
Speaker 2: that's really interesting.
Speaker 1: Gary, Yeah, and I like that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's tough because like you always have, like I'll
Speaker 3: make a to do list and there's things that I
Speaker 3: can't get to and or like I'll just be like
Speaker 3: I could do this to now, so but you have
Speaker 3: to because you'll be driving yourself insane.
Speaker 1: There's always just too much. There's always something to do.
Speaker 2: There's always something to do, and and yeah, sometimes you
Speaker 2: really just gotta do nothing. And I have. So there's
Speaker 2: so much discomfort in doing nothing for me because you know,
Speaker 2: when I get depressed, it's usually because I'm not working
Speaker 2: hard enough. And people go, well, when you're Depressednik, you
Speaker 2: got to relax and you're sick and you got to
Speaker 2: take a break. And I'm like, then that's just feeds
Speaker 2: it more because if I take a break, because I'm well,
Speaker 2: I'm usually working too much. Burnout leads to depression. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but my depression is also rooted in feeling like I'm
Speaker 2: not accomplishing things and then so I can't rest because
Speaker 2: then it'll come on even more. And so it's just
Speaker 2: like this snake eating itself.
Speaker 3: And oh yeah, fear of missing out, like oh gosh,
Speaker 3: you're sure you're doing like your podcast, but then you
Speaker 3: maybe you're so exhausted, like I want to get on
Speaker 3: stage tonight, but like I am so tired.
Speaker 2: Oh that's why I moved to Saint Louis, because there's
Speaker 2: no stage time here and I don't because otherwise I
Speaker 2: would be out doing it. It's when there's you could
Speaker 2: be gary. If you're not out there, someone's doing that
Speaker 2: spot that you would be doing. They're getting better because
Speaker 2: we both know that the only way you get better
Speaker 2: at stand up is doing it. Yeah, there's no like
Speaker 2: performing writing for and performing for your family or whatever.
Speaker 2: We're citing it in the mirror. Okay, there's uh. It
Speaker 2: says if someone is angry with me or yelling or whatever,
Speaker 2: I will calmly say I think I understand, but could
Speaker 2: you rephrase the problem differently to help me understand better.
Speaker 2: That's a good tip in a fight.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Ten times they stop dead in their tracks, regroup and
Speaker 2: rephrase calmly.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I don't know. I mean with a
Speaker 1: sane person.
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, that's true. I mean this is a customer service.
Speaker 2: It sounds like yes, like your wife in the kitchen. Right,
Speaker 2: there's the one that, oh, this is this is what
Speaker 2: I thought was pretty good for just us in general
Speaker 2: and everyone. It's this guy said. My dad used this
Speaker 2: phrase a lot while I was growing up. Make it
Speaker 2: easy for them to give you what you want when asked.
Speaker 2: And this is Dale Carnegie too, Like, incentivize people to
Speaker 2: give you things that you want. Don't just be like, hey,
Speaker 2: can I come on your podcast? You gotta be like, hey,
Speaker 2: I have a podcast that is uh incredible right now
Speaker 2: and it's blowing up, and here's the premise. And I
Speaker 2: think we could have a really interesting discussion around like
Speaker 2: show like show value when you pitch yourself to things
Speaker 2: like I'm just thinking about when I used to have
Speaker 2: to like write people for stage time when I first
Speaker 2: speak to New York, and I'm like, I think I
Speaker 2: would bring something very fresh and funny to I would
Speaker 2: always have to. I would Dale Carnegie and go like,
Speaker 2: what can I offer you, and like, and I will
Speaker 2: be there on time. Make it easy for them. I'll
Speaker 2: be there on time, I'll promote it, I'll do like
Speaker 2: give them. I like this advice of just make things
Speaker 2: easy for people to give you what you want.
Speaker 1: For sure.
Speaker 2: I think that's a good one. It's probably one that
Speaker 2: your dad used as well.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, well, you know, my one of my things,
Speaker 3: one of my things. Yeah, I mean, yeah, my dad
Speaker 3: was great at it. But yeah, there's always a benefit
Speaker 3: to the person that was involved in one of his scams. Like,
Speaker 3: you know, they think that they're going to be getting,
Speaker 3: you know, a deal of something, a high commission, you know.
Speaker 3: I mean that's how a lot of scams work, you know,
Speaker 3: a lot of the Ponzi schemes. You think that you're
Speaker 3: going to be getting you know, twenty yeah, twenty percent
Speaker 3: return on your money where you're like, oh, okay, this
Speaker 3: sounds good, but then yeah, but then you're gonna get screwed.
Speaker 2: And your dad would collect people. Your dad always remembered
Speaker 2: a name or not. Maybe he didn't remember it, but
Speaker 2: you said he always got people's cards. Was always extra edge.
Speaker 3: Cards, take shit, to take pictures of people, so became
Speaker 3: a very familiar face with wherever whatever he was doing,
Speaker 3: very loud, like you know, like, oh this man, funny,
Speaker 3: jovial guy, and like, you know, yeah, exactly, and then yeah,
Speaker 3: it didn't seem like nobody could see, like you know,
Speaker 3: that there was something wrong, you know, because it's it
Speaker 3: seems like he's just a straight shooter.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean you bring his kid along too, so it's like.
Speaker 2: And you're cute as hell and just and why would
Speaker 2: a why would he involve a kid in a scam?
Speaker 2: Like a kid is a kid? Just complete, it's a genius. Actually,
Speaker 2: your dad is obviously smart. You're obviously smart. You're so hilarious.
Speaker 2: Go see Gary on the road. I'm guessing Gary Veter
Speaker 2: dot com, yep vi I D e R dot com,
Speaker 2: follow him on socials, and definitely you have to check
Speaker 2: out this podcast. I'm so into it right now. It's
Speaker 2: so refreshing to have a new serial type podcast to follow,
Speaker 2: and because I've been wanting one in my life and
Speaker 2: I'm so glad you came on the show because I
Speaker 2: was gonna listen to it anyway, but it was just
Speaker 2: so good to ask you questions, and I'll probably be
Speaker 2: asking you more as the season goes on, but it's
Speaker 2: still early enough. Everyone get on board now because you'll
Speaker 2: you'll the episodes are a half hour, so you can
Speaker 2: get through three really quickly and then stay tuned for four,
Speaker 2: which is coming up on Monday, where we find out more.
Speaker 2: But I just can't wait to uncover this whole story.
Speaker 2: Thank you for being so vulnerable and doing it and
Speaker 2: all the hard work that would into it. It's such
Speaker 2: it's such a cool thing that you've done, and it's yeah, I'm.
Speaker 1: So appreciate it. Thanks for having me.
Speaker 2: Proud of you and I just think it's awesome. Thank
Speaker 2: you so much, Gary, thank you, Thanks Nick. You all right, guys,
Speaker 2: that's the show. We will see you next week. Brian
Speaker 2: will be back from his goldbladder surgery. I'm going to
Speaker 2: be in DC this weekend and also at Foxwood's Casino.
Speaker 2: It's sold out on Friday night, but or on Saturday
Speaker 2: night Foxwoods. But if you're in the Connecticut area, which
Speaker 2: is a lot of places, Foxwoods on Sunday night not
Speaker 2: sold out yet, still tickets available, come on out to
Speaker 2: that show. I would love the besties to be there
Speaker 2: and how great was Gary? That was so much fun.
Speaker 2: We'll be back next week. Don't beca see you guys fighting.
Speaker 3: M