1 00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:25,759 Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, Emily ABOUDI here. You are listening to another 2 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:33,040 Speaker 1: installment of five Minute Friday Long Longside. It's been a 3 00:00:33,080 --> 00:00:36,959 Speaker 1: really hectic twenty four hours for me for reasons that 4 00:00:37,680 --> 00:00:40,920 Speaker 1: I'm not really going to go into just right now, 5 00:00:41,159 --> 00:00:45,920 Speaker 1: but just dealing with a little bit of a health 6 00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:51,920 Speaker 1: scare in my family, and I have been using a 7 00:00:52,000 --> 00:00:55,520 Speaker 1: lot of tools in my toolbox that I want to 8 00:00:55,560 --> 00:01:00,400 Speaker 1: talk about for today's episode. So I'll start by saying 9 00:01:00,400 --> 00:01:04,399 Speaker 1: that I recently began the book Lighter by Young Ployblow, 10 00:01:04,600 --> 00:01:08,080 Speaker 1: and at the end of every chapter, I'm literally opening 11 00:01:08,160 --> 00:01:13,080 Speaker 1: up this book right now. There are reflection prompts, and 12 00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:16,399 Speaker 1: one of those prompts is what does self love look 13 00:01:16,480 --> 00:01:18,839 Speaker 1: like for you right now? And how do you want 14 00:01:18,840 --> 00:01:21,880 Speaker 1: your self love to evolve? And what do you want 15 00:01:22,080 --> 00:01:24,040 Speaker 1: it to feel like a year from now. I guess 16 00:01:24,120 --> 00:01:26,440 Speaker 1: that was kind of like one prompt, but a three 17 00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:29,880 Speaker 1: part prompt, if you will. And so I was sitting 18 00:01:30,280 --> 00:01:35,000 Speaker 1: in the getaway cabin I took my mom to. They 19 00:01:35,040 --> 00:01:37,319 Speaker 1: have these cute little cabins. They're kind of all over 20 00:01:37,360 --> 00:01:41,520 Speaker 1: the United States now, but there's an outpost in an 21 00:01:41,560 --> 00:01:44,520 Speaker 1: area of Connecticut called Moodis and I took her there 22 00:01:45,160 --> 00:01:46,920 Speaker 1: for and overnight the other day, and so I woke 23 00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:49,120 Speaker 1: up and I was reading my book and writing on 24 00:01:49,200 --> 00:01:53,400 Speaker 1: this prompt, and what came up for me is that 25 00:01:54,320 --> 00:01:57,080 Speaker 1: self love moving forward is going to be something that 26 00:01:57,200 --> 00:02:01,800 Speaker 1: feels more intuitive and less like something that I need 27 00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:04,280 Speaker 1: to go out of my way to do. I want 28 00:02:04,320 --> 00:02:07,520 Speaker 1: to have less guilt over some of the practices that 29 00:02:07,600 --> 00:02:11,360 Speaker 1: I know can help me be me and move forward 30 00:02:11,360 --> 00:02:15,680 Speaker 1: in a way that, yeah, it just feels more like 31 00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:20,239 Speaker 1: a part of me. And as I sat at the 32 00:02:20,320 --> 00:02:23,480 Speaker 1: top of this just navigating a really stressful past twenty 33 00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:30,680 Speaker 1: four hours, today self love happened without question for me, 34 00:02:30,880 --> 00:02:35,400 Speaker 1: self love meant I needed to cancel my meetings. I 35 00:02:35,440 --> 00:02:38,000 Speaker 1: realize I'm saying today, and it's you're listening to this 36 00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:40,840 Speaker 1: on Friday and I'm recording this on Thursday. But you 37 00:02:40,880 --> 00:02:44,280 Speaker 1: get the picture. So I canceled my meetings, knowing that 38 00:02:44,440 --> 00:02:49,639 Speaker 1: none of them were life or death matters. I decided, 39 00:02:49,680 --> 00:02:53,160 Speaker 1: when I was feeling anxious and frustrated about admittedly things 40 00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:57,400 Speaker 1: that I could do nothing about, to get up and 41 00:02:58,200 --> 00:03:02,440 Speaker 1: go walk and get outside. I took time to call 42 00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:07,799 Speaker 1: people that support me and allowed them to show up 43 00:03:07,800 --> 00:03:13,640 Speaker 1: for me. And all of these things. They sound simple enough, 44 00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:18,960 Speaker 1: but many are acts that I would have felt guilty in, 45 00:03:20,080 --> 00:03:23,360 Speaker 1: I guess indulging in If something like this were to 46 00:03:23,400 --> 00:03:27,239 Speaker 1: happen previously, I would have plowed through right and plowing 47 00:03:27,280 --> 00:03:32,000 Speaker 1: through today just didn't feel like an option. And as 48 00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:34,880 Speaker 1: much as I'm just trying to figure out the best 49 00:03:34,920 --> 00:03:38,800 Speaker 1: way to push forward, I am proud that pushing forward 50 00:03:38,880 --> 00:03:42,960 Speaker 1: for me right now looks like having grace with myself. 51 00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:47,840 Speaker 1: That for me, that's a really big growth moment. And 52 00:03:47,960 --> 00:03:52,480 Speaker 1: so I tell you this story because I want to 53 00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:56,040 Speaker 1: encourage you to be able to get to a place 54 00:03:56,480 --> 00:03:59,760 Speaker 1: where you two have this level of grace where you 55 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:03,040 Speaker 1: can listen to your intuition and your gut on the 56 00:04:03,080 --> 00:04:06,840 Speaker 1: good days and the bad days, and know a little 57 00:04:06,920 --> 00:04:09,520 Speaker 1: bit more about what it is that you need to 58 00:04:09,600 --> 00:04:13,720 Speaker 1: do to best show up for you, to know that 59 00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:17,080 Speaker 1: in order to be there for others, something that I 60 00:04:17,160 --> 00:04:21,159 Speaker 1: personally resonate so highly with, something that is ingrained in 61 00:04:21,240 --> 00:04:24,240 Speaker 1: who I am, is acts of service and helping other people. 62 00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:26,560 Speaker 1: But in order to do that, I need to first 63 00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:30,160 Speaker 1: show up for myself. And if I cannot place that 64 00:04:30,279 --> 00:04:33,520 Speaker 1: same importance, if I cannot invest in myself. Then I 65 00:04:33,680 --> 00:04:36,240 Speaker 1: know that no matter what I do, I will not 66 00:04:36,480 --> 00:04:39,440 Speaker 1: be as good at doing the thing that is so 67 00:04:39,600 --> 00:04:45,159 Speaker 1: important to me in showing up for others. And so 68 00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:48,640 Speaker 1: my prompt for you this week is really the prompt 69 00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:53,400 Speaker 1: that I answered from Young Pueblo. Again, I'll say it. 70 00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:57,200 Speaker 1: What does self love look like for you right now? 71 00:04:57,880 --> 00:05:00,680 Speaker 1: How do you want your self love to evolve? And 72 00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:02,920 Speaker 1: what do you want it to feel like a year 73 00:05:03,520 --> 00:05:09,159 Speaker 1: from now? I want to reiterate that self love doesn't 74 00:05:09,279 --> 00:05:12,440 Speaker 1: just happen in good times or in bad times, and 75 00:05:12,480 --> 00:05:16,360 Speaker 1: it can evolve and adapt and morph depending on what 76 00:05:16,440 --> 00:05:19,039 Speaker 1: it is that you truly need. But when we get 77 00:05:19,080 --> 00:05:22,960 Speaker 1: more clear on what it is that our inner voice 78 00:05:23,040 --> 00:05:27,080 Speaker 1: is saying, when we can get really clear on what 79 00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:30,240 Speaker 1: it feels like, what we want to feel like when 80 00:05:30,279 --> 00:05:36,520 Speaker 1: we take care of ourselves, that that's so so important. 81 00:05:37,120 --> 00:05:43,000 Speaker 1: And now a listener question. Hey, Emily, it's almost Valentine's Day, 82 00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:47,320 Speaker 1: So I was curious, what is your idea of the 83 00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:53,960 Speaker 1: perfect date? Oh Man, Valentine's Day? This year, It's like 84 00:05:54,040 --> 00:05:56,479 Speaker 1: the last thing on my radar. Although I am kind 85 00:05:56,480 --> 00:05:59,400 Speaker 1: of a sucker, I'm a sucker for love. I love love, 86 00:06:00,680 --> 00:06:03,359 Speaker 1: but I can't say that I've had like a memorable 87 00:06:03,440 --> 00:06:06,800 Speaker 1: Valentine's Day in the last handful of years. Anyway, I 88 00:06:06,880 --> 00:06:12,320 Speaker 1: digress my perfect date. However, Honestly, when I hear that question, 89 00:06:12,480 --> 00:06:14,480 Speaker 1: I can tell you what I'd like to be doing, 90 00:06:14,520 --> 00:06:18,279 Speaker 1: and it probably just involves like good food and good 91 00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:22,440 Speaker 1: drinks and a good person. But the good person and 92 00:06:22,440 --> 00:06:25,320 Speaker 1: how I want to feel is actually what in my 93 00:06:25,520 --> 00:06:28,719 Speaker 1: mind makes a perfect date. Like on a perfect date, 94 00:06:29,200 --> 00:06:32,000 Speaker 1: I want to feel seen and heard. I want to 95 00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:35,760 Speaker 1: be able to ask questions and answer questions. I want 96 00:06:35,800 --> 00:06:38,880 Speaker 1: this person to be interested in me and open to 97 00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:42,920 Speaker 1: hearing my perspective. I want to feel like I am 98 00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:46,680 Speaker 1: someone that they're attracted to. I would also like for 99 00:06:46,720 --> 00:06:50,640 Speaker 1: them to be someone that I'm attracted to. And I 100 00:06:50,640 --> 00:06:54,000 Speaker 1: think those are really my key takeaways of what I 101 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:57,240 Speaker 1: think about when it comes to a perfect date. Is 102 00:06:57,279 --> 00:07:03,400 Speaker 1: really the feeling of spending time with someone that makes 103 00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:06,680 Speaker 1: you feel like a good version of you, like your 104 00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:10,520 Speaker 1: best you, and also like all the butterflies. Those are 105 00:07:10,520 --> 00:07:14,520 Speaker 1: cool too. If I had to get really specific, though, 106 00:07:14,680 --> 00:07:17,320 Speaker 1: rewinding to the food and drink thing, I mean, it's 107 00:07:17,400 --> 00:07:22,280 Speaker 1: no secret I am a bar premie kind of girl. 108 00:07:22,360 --> 00:07:25,040 Speaker 1: It's a restaurant in New York, down on Bowery. I 109 00:07:25,080 --> 00:07:28,840 Speaker 1: also love when a date plans the date, although I 110 00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:31,360 Speaker 1: don't have any hesitation, like if they need a suggestion 111 00:07:31,480 --> 00:07:34,280 Speaker 1: or something, I'm happy to chime in. But I am 112 00:07:34,440 --> 00:07:40,000 Speaker 1: definitely an old school kind of girl. Wow, what a 113 00:07:40,640 --> 00:07:43,320 Speaker 1: what an up and down kind of five minute Friday? 114 00:07:45,080 --> 00:07:49,800 Speaker 1: Life is crazy, but every day's a new day, and 115 00:07:49,880 --> 00:07:55,000 Speaker 1: so let's get this one. Another hurdle conquered. Catch you 116 00:07:55,040 --> 00:08:04,840 Speaker 1: guys next time, lay lay hand.