WEBVTT - My Future Put My Dreams To Shame ft. Tiffany D Cross 0:00:05.200 --> 0:00:12.360 Hey, hey, hey, I'm back. I'm blacker than ever because 0:00:12.360 --> 0:00:16.360 I was in Africa. I'm brown and this should and 0:00:16.400 --> 0:00:20.680 this should and this ambition. We're extra black in the 0:00:20.720 --> 0:00:22.200 studio today, Mandy. 0:00:22.960 --> 0:00:26.960 I know not only that blacker, but more. Tiffany girlsivity 0:00:27.040 --> 0:00:27.960 times too. 0:00:33.320 --> 0:00:33.880 Beautiful. 0:00:33.960 --> 0:00:35.640 We call you adult Chase since you just got back 0:00:35.640 --> 0:00:36.519 from Africa, and. 0:00:38.120 --> 0:00:43.000 By my African name. Yes I know. So I was like, so, 0:00:43.360 --> 0:00:45.159 because we're gonna throw Tiffany right into the cross here 0:00:45.240 --> 0:00:47.600 is because Tiffany Cross is her name. So I'm gonna 0:00:47.600 --> 0:00:50.400 introduce her really quickly because we got to talk. I 0:00:50.440 --> 0:00:53.080 actually will so I think, Mandy, next time it's just 0:00:53.080 --> 0:00:55.120 me and you, I'll talk about the trip because we 0:00:55.200 --> 0:00:56.880 have no to talk about. 0:00:57.400 --> 0:00:59.240 Tell me a little bit about the trip if I may, 0:00:59.320 --> 0:01:03.360 but follow your ladies lead. I'm obsessed with all things African. 0:01:03.440 --> 0:01:09.600 I have an African name, so I'm I'm na tiffanyin. 0:01:09.920 --> 0:01:10.200 I went. 0:01:10.360 --> 0:01:15.319 I went to Ghana like a name. Okay, well I 0:01:15.360 --> 0:01:17.720 did African ancestry. I have my lineage straight, so I 0:01:17.880 --> 0:01:22.119 literally my matrilineal DNA connects all the way back to Ghana. 0:01:22.480 --> 0:01:24.520 And so I went to Gana and had a naming ceremony, 0:01:24.600 --> 0:01:30.360 and that's my name, and tell me yours again. Adulci 0:01:30.880 --> 0:01:33.919 adulte okay, so a Beena Adoche and Mandy. 0:01:34.280 --> 0:01:43.160 Yeah, I'm like the Peggy and I'll be Nandy Africa, 0:01:43.480 --> 0:01:46.160 although I am mostly Nigerians of Tiffany. I'm coming. 0:01:50.560 --> 0:01:56.520 Hustle. I said you could, all right, so we are 0:01:56.560 --> 0:02:00.720 welcoming to the show. Tiffany de Cross most recently hosted 0:02:00.800 --> 0:02:04.520 The Cross Connection on MSNBC Get Into It. She's the 0:02:04.560 --> 0:02:07.760 author of Saying Louder Black Voters White Narratives and Saving 0:02:07.800 --> 0:02:11.919 Our Democracy and previously served as a Resident Fellow at 0:02:12.040 --> 0:02:18.040 Harvard Kennedy Schools Institute of Politics. Her broad experience across media, politics, 0:02:18.080 --> 0:02:22.320 and policy include more than two decades of navigating newsrooms 0:02:22.600 --> 0:02:26.960 and campaigns while engaging different constituencies on the ground. She 0:02:27.120 --> 0:02:29.679 is a former DC Bureau Chief of b E T 0:02:29.880 --> 0:02:33.480 News Okay, and cut her teeth in media at CNN, 0:02:33.520 --> 0:02:36.280 where she worked as an associate producer covering. 0:02:36.800 --> 0:02:42.320 This is an old bio, this is it? Oh, you 0:02:42.440 --> 0:02:44.520 got all the important stuff, but this is I mean. 0:02:44.600 --> 0:02:47.200 I didn't mean. I'm sorry, I'm rude, girl. 0:02:47.200 --> 0:02:49.040 I know I felt that when who read my bio. Anyway, 0:02:49.320 --> 0:02:52.799 she's the girl when it comes to like all things media, 0:02:53.080 --> 0:02:58.920 politics and right, and so we welcome her to the podcast. 0:02:59.120 --> 0:03:02.320 Hey tippin it. Hey ladies, I'm so happy to be here, 0:03:02.360 --> 0:03:04.600 and can I just first face congratulations, see you ladies, 0:03:04.639 --> 0:03:07.760 because as I'm navigating the podcast world, it is really 0:03:07.760 --> 0:03:10.080 building brick by brick, and you guys have built quite 0:03:10.080 --> 0:03:15.000 an audience and a platform. And I'm always happy to 0:03:15.080 --> 0:03:18.280 be one most importantly happy to be in the company 0:03:18.280 --> 0:03:20.600 of my sisters. But y'all are my sisters in many ways, 0:03:20.639 --> 0:03:24.200 including in journalism. So thank you for posting me, having 0:03:24.200 --> 0:03:26.160 me on your amazing platform today. 0:03:26.400 --> 0:03:27.680 Yeah, so excited to have you. 0:03:28.320 --> 0:03:30.680 So we have you in here. But like I said, 0:03:30.680 --> 0:03:33.560 so just really briefly, y'all. I came back from Africa. 0:03:34.000 --> 0:03:36.520 I went to four different countries. I want to shout 0:03:36.560 --> 0:03:40.960 out the amazing tour. I guess you could say group 0:03:41.000 --> 0:03:43.640 that I went with it's called Black Girls Travel Too. 0:03:44.160 --> 0:03:48.360 I encourage if you a sister who wants to travel 0:03:48.360 --> 0:03:51.040 the world and you're like ooh, a little nervous, and 0:03:51.200 --> 0:03:53.440 whether you have someone to go with or not, it 0:03:53.640 --> 0:03:56.560 was amazing. I think the woman whor name is Danielle, 0:03:56.560 --> 0:03:59.680 who started in Girl and Yell wasn't on the trip 0:03:59.680 --> 0:04:02.040 with us, but she had Renee, who's a friend of mine. 0:04:02.120 --> 0:04:04.440 That's how I found out about it, and a woman 0:04:04.480 --> 0:04:07.360 named Zama. They were our two guides, if you will 0:04:07.440 --> 0:04:10.520 of this this like. It was two weeks, almost two 0:04:10.520 --> 0:04:14.360 full weeks, and we landed in South Africa. We did 0:04:14.400 --> 0:04:19.159 Johannesburg in Cape Town. Then we flew to Zimbabwe. No, yeah, 0:04:19.160 --> 0:04:23.919 we flew to Zimbabwe and from Zimbabwe we went to 0:04:23.960 --> 0:04:27.479 Botswana for a safari on land at Safari by Water 0:04:27.880 --> 0:04:30.400 and then we had dinner in Zambia. So four countries, 0:04:30.480 --> 0:04:33.800 two weeks. Every every hotel was better than the rest. 0:04:33.839 --> 0:04:36.719 The last hotel was my favorite, was owned by a 0:04:36.839 --> 0:04:40.200 Zambian woman. Oh, I'm gonna it's called Bono m A 0:04:40.560 --> 0:04:43.599 m A b oh. I don't want to get it wrong, 0:04:43.600 --> 0:04:45.400 but I'm gonna give her tenerary. 0:04:45.520 --> 0:04:50.800 I read it yesterday, cool copy and pastes. I'm going 0:04:50.800 --> 0:04:51.479 to do the same thing. 0:04:51.560 --> 0:04:55.120 I mean, it was so I like, when we go, 0:04:55.160 --> 0:04:56.840 I'll do Look, We'll do a whole episode talking through 0:04:56.880 --> 0:04:59.520 it because I think it's so important for to see 0:04:59.520 --> 0:05:02.880 the level of black women excellence. It was. I mean, 0:05:03.160 --> 0:05:05.599 y'all do not have traveled. It traveled and I have 0:05:05.680 --> 0:05:08.240 done group travel, I have done travel by myself, I 0:05:08.240 --> 0:05:13.040 have done family travel, and hands down, this was the smoothest, 0:05:13.320 --> 0:05:17.679 most organized. Like I shared the itinerary of Mandy. It's like, girl, 0:05:17.720 --> 0:05:21.000 there's nothing they didn't think of. Yeah, I mean down 0:05:21.080 --> 0:05:23.000 to sometimes the day like hey, on this day, you 0:05:23.000 --> 0:05:26.320 could wear bright colors. South Africa women tend to wear 0:05:26.320 --> 0:05:28.400 these type you know, like everything you could think of 0:05:28.560 --> 0:05:29.599 it was excellent. 0:05:30.200 --> 0:05:32.560 I mean on a What got me is they bring 0:05:32.560 --> 0:05:35.880 a photographer Tiffany to love it, so that you don't 0:05:35.920 --> 0:05:37.440 have to worry about all that and it's not in 0:05:37.600 --> 0:05:39.279 like they're there with you the whole trip. 0:05:39.480 --> 0:05:41.839 Yeah. So not the same one, but every country they 0:05:41.880 --> 0:05:44.200 would have And that's what I really love too, is 0:05:44.240 --> 0:05:47.040 that every country they really leaned into working with the 0:05:47.080 --> 0:05:49.680 people of that country. So your driving would be from 0:05:49.760 --> 0:05:52.800 like Zimbabwe when we were in Zimbabwe, and then when 0:05:52.800 --> 0:05:56.160 we were in South Africa, somebody else in Azama, who 0:05:56.240 --> 0:05:59.040 was amazing. This is a testament to just the magical 0:05:59.720 --> 0:06:03.000 proper is of black women, especially African women. Zama on 0:06:03.040 --> 0:06:05.320 our trip spoke like six languages and she was like, Oh, 0:06:05.320 --> 0:06:07.680 everybody speaks about four or five. I'm like, not me. 0:06:08.480 --> 0:06:11.480 Yeah, I mean she would even across the globe. 0:06:12.600 --> 0:06:17.680 Five languages. She would switch between Zulu Tosa. It's like 0:06:18.320 --> 0:06:23.040 like that, you know, Yes, we were in the zam 0:06:23.200 --> 0:06:26.520 We're in the Zimbabwe. She was speaking a language there. 0:06:26.520 --> 0:06:30.040 I mean, just switching interchangeably in and out. Her angles 0:06:30.080 --> 0:06:34.040 was better than mine. It was excellent. And like I said, 0:06:34.040 --> 0:06:36.599 I'll share that hotel later. But have you ever read 0:06:36.640 --> 0:06:37.320 Born a Crime? 0:06:37.960 --> 0:06:42.479 Yeah, we were saying the languages because he said, like 0:06:42.520 --> 0:06:46.120 that was such credo in his development, because he was 0:06:46.160 --> 0:06:47.680 able to go to school and make friends because he 0:06:47.760 --> 0:06:50.839 spoke all the different so languages, but the dialects and 0:06:50.920 --> 0:06:54.880 these languages that is communication. It's really like kind of 0:06:54.960 --> 0:06:59.160 like stupid ignorant that we don't that conservative sect of 0:06:59.200 --> 0:07:03.880 America that is like English only. You know, it's the 0:07:03.920 --> 0:07:07.120 same sect of people who are like, no, you know, 0:07:07.360 --> 0:07:11.600 we don't want any diversity or culture taught in schools. 0:07:11.640 --> 0:07:14.520 You know, we only want this fictionalized version of America 0:07:14.600 --> 0:07:17.000 taught in schools. And it's just baffling because it's like, 0:07:17.000 --> 0:07:18.760 why do you want your kids to be dumbered in mine. 0:07:18.800 --> 0:07:22.880 I mean, it's not giving what you think it's giving. 0:07:22.880 --> 0:07:24.280 As the kids would say, right. 0:07:24.480 --> 0:07:27.960 The consortative argument is paper thin and it's so easily 0:07:28.040 --> 0:07:31.880 blown away by like the tinest, tiniest gust effect. It's 0:07:31.920 --> 0:07:34.480 just the fact that we're born from immigrants this country, 0:07:34.520 --> 0:07:37.000 like none of us is from here. We're but the 0:07:37.120 --> 0:07:40.040 English language itself is like a complete mil to be 0:07:41.360 --> 0:07:47.320 so much do the bare minimum, like lagnostic education. I 0:07:47.400 --> 0:07:50.200 know it's not about that, it's about yes, but yeah, 0:07:50.240 --> 0:07:50.520 but I. 0:07:50.480 --> 0:07:52.120 Just want to, like before like I wrap up this 0:07:52.160 --> 0:07:54.520 because I we'll do a whole trip discussion another time, 0:07:54.520 --> 0:07:56.440 but I really do want to shout out black girls 0:07:56.440 --> 0:07:59.640 travel to please follow them if you're T O or 0:07:59.720 --> 0:08:02.320 the T two oh as well to O o oh 0:08:02.400 --> 0:08:05.280 too oh as well, yeah that girl's travel too, and 0:08:05.280 --> 0:08:07.800 then also too. I really wanted to shout out Bino 0:08:07.920 --> 0:08:12.200 Manor Hotel, a m M M b A n O 0:08:13.160 --> 0:08:16.040 Mba and O Manor Hotel and Victoria Falls in Zimbabwe, 0:08:16.240 --> 0:08:18.720 that's where they don't even have rooms. You get a 0:08:18.920 --> 0:08:23.440 and I'm using the word humbly cottage cottage like so 0:08:23.480 --> 0:08:26.000 you get your own home that you live in. That 0:08:26.200 --> 0:08:28.120 is like I mean a claw foot tub in the 0:08:28.160 --> 0:08:30.760 middle of the bathroom. It looks like straight out of 0:08:30.800 --> 0:08:33.400 a magazine. And they have been featured in so many magazines. 0:08:33.559 --> 0:08:35.520 And the fact that it's own and run by this 0:08:35.600 --> 0:08:39.560 woman from Zimbabwe, this black African woman from Zimbabwe. The 0:08:39.720 --> 0:08:43.280 experience like was, it just was top tier. And I 0:08:43.400 --> 0:08:45.160 just so I told her, I was like, girl, why 0:08:45.240 --> 0:08:46.960 are not the why the girl is not coming here? 0:08:47.400 --> 0:08:49.360 Victoria Falls, which is one of the Seven Wonders of 0:08:49.360 --> 0:08:50.160 the Natural World. 0:08:50.240 --> 0:08:52.880 I'm a book a trip before with this episode airs 0:08:52.920 --> 0:08:55.720 because I feel like no one does a testimonial like 0:08:55.760 --> 0:08:57.600 Tiffany what. 0:08:57.760 --> 0:08:59.800 I love it. I'm like, it was they only had 0:08:59.840 --> 0:09:03.319 a eighteen she had eighteen college cottages and we took 0:09:03.360 --> 0:09:06.160 up ten of them. And so it is it is. 0:09:06.520 --> 0:09:08.800 I just I never say anything like it. We were 0:09:08.840 --> 0:09:12.200 just like mouth open, like what And I just end 0:09:12.240 --> 0:09:14.320 with this. You know, the very people that tell you 0:09:14.320 --> 0:09:16.520 not to go to Africa because so Dangerous's who's filling 0:09:16.559 --> 0:09:19.720 up these beautiful places when you go to Africa, Hoppy, 0:09:19.800 --> 0:09:23.480 you said that. I thought you saying come here, but 0:09:23.559 --> 0:09:26.599 here you are with all the children and your Yeah, 0:09:26.640 --> 0:09:29.880 And so I just encourage, like, you know, to to 0:09:30.360 --> 0:09:34.640 when you're thinking about travel to include Africa. I have 0:09:34.760 --> 0:09:37.679 been all around the world and I have felt unsafe 0:09:37.679 --> 0:09:39.360 in some places and this was not one of them. 0:09:39.400 --> 0:09:42.120 This trip was not one of them. And so yeah, 0:09:42.160 --> 0:09:43.680 it was just excellent. But like I said, we'll do 0:09:43.679 --> 0:09:45.680 a breakdown because we got a guest in the house. 0:09:45.720 --> 0:09:47.480 We have some mess to talk. 0:09:47.320 --> 0:09:51.320 Child really quickly, though, did you got me excited talking 0:09:51.320 --> 0:09:55.760 about Africa? I think it's so important what you say. 0:09:55.840 --> 0:09:58.000 But I think the other reason why it's important for 0:09:58.080 --> 0:09:59.760 us to travel to Africa because I hear people in 0:09:59.800 --> 0:10:02.200 the hosts on the ground they pictures in you know, 0:10:02.600 --> 0:10:05.120 Greece and Italy, and it's like they all know to 0:10:05.200 --> 0:10:07.520 role these countries played in the slave trade, what they 0:10:07.559 --> 0:10:09.520 did to black folks, and how they pill its Africa. Like, 0:10:09.520 --> 0:10:11.280 I'll be damn if I give my money there before 0:10:11.280 --> 0:10:13.120 I go to the continent and spend some money. But 0:10:13.280 --> 0:10:16.680 going to Africa reminds us that our stories do not 0:10:16.960 --> 0:10:20.600 begin when they say so. Our stories do not begin 0:10:20.720 --> 0:10:23.160 when we were kidnapped and raped and had the humanity 0:10:23.240 --> 0:10:25.720 beat out of us. In this country, we had a strong, 0:10:25.840 --> 0:10:33.400 rich tradition of spirituality, religion, fashion, upward mobility. Imagine what Africa, 0:10:33.480 --> 0:10:37.400 the continent would be had it never been pillaged by Europe, 0:10:37.640 --> 0:10:41.959 you know, and what we would be right exactly exactly 0:10:44.280 --> 0:10:47.440 Africa is continuously when you go over there, you see 0:10:47.440 --> 0:10:51.400 a heavy presence by the Russians, by the Chinese president. 0:10:51.480 --> 0:10:54.800 She is like all over Africa, and they are making friends. 0:10:54.800 --> 0:10:58.560 Beyond investing in the continent, They're making friends with their leaders. 0:10:58.600 --> 0:11:03.000 That's why when the whole Russian Ukraine conflict started getting 0:11:03.000 --> 0:11:07.959 more coverage, you saw some strange bedfellows. It was like, oh, 0:11:08.000 --> 0:11:10.120 the President's south there, evan food and we're kind of 0:11:10.200 --> 0:11:12.439 cozy there for a minute. And that's why. So the 0:11:12.559 --> 0:11:15.000 United States has not only step up their investment, but 0:11:15.040 --> 0:11:17.720 the United States citizens have to step up their intellectual 0:11:17.720 --> 0:11:20.679 curiosity and go go visit Africa. So I love that 0:11:20.760 --> 0:11:24.040 you went there, Tiffany. That's I'm excited that Myerian so like, 0:11:24.120 --> 0:11:25.400 hey went. 0:11:27.000 --> 0:11:27.840 In their background. 0:11:27.840 --> 0:11:33.200 I'm like, she go back, she stay. 0:11:31.800 --> 0:11:32.520 With that movie. 0:11:33.080 --> 0:11:34.800 Have you seen the Netflix with Regina King? 0:11:35.000 --> 0:11:35.720 I had seen. 0:11:36.080 --> 0:11:38.520 Yeah, it's really. 0:11:38.480 --> 0:11:39.839 I was happy to see Regina King. 0:11:40.120 --> 0:11:44.920 Yes, yes, yes, yes, hey ba fan, We're gonna take 0:11:44.960 --> 0:11:52.320 a quick break and we'll be right back. So can 0:11:52.360 --> 0:11:55.720 we talk about the elephant and the room? 0:11:55.960 --> 0:11:56.880 Which one girl? 0:11:56.920 --> 0:11:57.360 Which one? 0:11:57.640 --> 0:11:58.520 Is a lot going on? 0:11:58.760 --> 0:12:00.280 Well, let's start with the worst of the worst. 0:12:02.559 --> 0:12:03.559 Which one? 0:12:05.120 --> 0:12:06.440 But I would say the worst of the worst, but 0:12:06.480 --> 0:12:09.960 the most jarring when I first saw it. So we've 0:12:10.000 --> 0:12:13.040 all heard, Well, let's let's even take a step back. 0:12:13.440 --> 0:12:14.959 I think that we were kind of all. If you 0:12:14.960 --> 0:12:16.800 grew up in hip hop culture, had all heard the 0:12:16.800 --> 0:12:20.600 whisperings that he wasn't the greatest of people, you know, 0:12:20.640 --> 0:12:23.080 whether it's Wendy Williams or whatever, that you would just 0:12:23.120 --> 0:12:26.959 hear like that's all great things about Shawcombs. Certainly you 0:12:26.960 --> 0:12:29.600 would see none of his artists flourish beyond giving him, 0:12:29.840 --> 0:12:33.280 you know, their fame, fortune, money, time, energy, youth. You know, 0:12:33.320 --> 0:12:35.000 he always did well, And so you were like that 0:12:35.040 --> 0:12:38.120 seems odd as someone who was have all has all 0:12:38.120 --> 0:12:40.160 the success. How come no one else get success but you? 0:12:41.320 --> 0:12:44.240 And so when Cassie came out with her lawsuit, and 0:12:44.240 --> 0:12:47.160 then the following other lawsuits they came out, I don't 0:12:47.160 --> 0:12:49.080 think anyone I never heard. I didn't hear anyone gasp 0:12:49.160 --> 0:12:52.720 in surprise. Everyone's like, hmm, sounds about what I've heard 0:12:53.880 --> 0:12:56.679 and I didn't read the details. Certainly some of them 0:12:56.679 --> 0:13:00.480 were shared on on social but it just sated horrific. 0:13:00.520 --> 0:13:02.720 The parts that did get kind of like shared. 0:13:02.760 --> 0:13:05.640 I read that the one from his not from Cassie, 0:13:05.679 --> 0:13:07.160 but the one where it was like what was it 0:13:07.200 --> 0:13:10.040 his his assistant or there was some a woman or 0:13:10.080 --> 0:13:11.520 a man it was a man. 0:13:11.559 --> 0:13:13.320 Rob something yet he it was a producer. 0:13:14.280 --> 0:13:17.760 Yeah, and he came out with his allegations and you know, 0:13:17.840 --> 0:13:20.319 but Cassie so they settled that lawsuit, right, so she 0:13:21.040 --> 0:13:24.959 won she won that or ended in unsettlement of some kind. 0:13:25.600 --> 0:13:28.440 And at the time, I'll never forget, like you know, 0:13:28.920 --> 0:13:32.080 did he put on Instagram? He posted this statement like 0:13:32.080 --> 0:13:35.120 people are assassinating my character. I won't stand for this. 0:13:35.880 --> 0:13:39.760 And I feel like there wasn't I mean, I think 0:13:39.720 --> 0:13:42.800 you've heard about some of his like his brand partnerships 0:13:42.840 --> 0:13:45.680 had like you know, kind of folded as a result. 0:13:45.720 --> 0:13:49.800 But it didn't feel like he fully got the like 0:13:49.840 --> 0:13:53.440 the social reckoning, like the consumer reckoning that some of 0:13:53.480 --> 0:13:58.679 the some other people in media or entertainment have as 0:13:58.679 --> 0:14:03.080 a result. But this past week, what it started with 0:14:03.520 --> 0:14:08.640 the CNN video CNN got ahold of a video maybe 0:14:08.679 --> 0:14:11.360 you have some insight Tiffany into. 0:14:12.559 --> 0:14:14.960 Yeah, let me say, first of all, this story New 0:14:15.040 --> 0:14:19.400 York Times is the original outlet that broke this story. Yes, 0:14:19.600 --> 0:14:22.760 and so you know, it was clear from the reporting 0:14:22.800 --> 0:14:24.400 of the New York Times that there had been some 0:14:24.480 --> 0:14:28.800 engagement between the singer, Cassie's legal team and the legal 0:14:28.840 --> 0:14:35.920 team of mister Colmbs. And this is me ascertaining based 0:14:35.960 --> 0:14:38.360 on what I read that Seawan Colmes was like, I'm 0:14:38.400 --> 0:14:41.920 not paying you anything. And then when the New York 0:14:41.960 --> 0:14:44.760 Times story broke, if you go back and read because 0:14:44.760 --> 0:14:46.280 this is the first time that we heard about this 0:14:46.400 --> 0:14:50.040 publicly in a public setting, if you go back and 0:14:50.080 --> 0:14:54.040 read that New York Times article, it is line for line, 0:14:54.080 --> 0:14:56.760 like a transcript of what you see in the video 0:14:57.040 --> 0:15:00.640 that CNN later obtained. Here's the thing that I'll about this. 0:15:01.600 --> 0:15:04.120 It did not take the video for me to believe 0:15:04.120 --> 0:15:07.760 what happened. I read the Times piece and it was 0:15:07.800 --> 0:15:12.280 clear I believe that this happened to this woman. Unfortunately, 0:15:12.360 --> 0:15:16.520 a lot of the social commentary is consistent with what 0:15:16.560 --> 0:15:19.400 it is so many other times, with it's a money grab, 0:15:19.720 --> 0:15:22.680 or if it was all that, then why didn't she leave? 0:15:23.240 --> 0:15:25.720 Or you know, they're trying to attack Sean Colmbs. And 0:15:25.760 --> 0:15:28.560 then you have that, you know, motip man of s fear, 0:15:28.960 --> 0:15:34.000 ignorant ass you know, foolish sect of society of people 0:15:34.080 --> 0:15:37.560 saying all their conspiracy theories because he had sued Diagio 0:15:37.640 --> 0:15:39.840 as the parent company of his liquor brand, and so 0:15:40.000 --> 0:15:42.560 they're trying to take down this black man. The danger 0:15:42.640 --> 0:15:44.760 in that is we, as black women, are so often 0:15:44.800 --> 0:15:49.120 expected to hold not only our pain from these types 0:15:49.160 --> 0:15:52.080 of incidents, but hold the pain of our counterparts, hold 0:15:52.120 --> 0:15:55.800 the pain of our brethren. We ask young girls, you know, 0:15:55.880 --> 0:15:59.200 for generations, young girls, hold the secret of this adult 0:15:59.320 --> 0:16:02.520 man who touched to who violated you, because even we 0:16:02.640 --> 0:16:05.760 know how cruel and unforgiving the white man's criminal justice 0:16:05.760 --> 0:16:09.280 system is. And so immediately I admit, as black women 0:16:09.320 --> 0:16:12.240 are sometimes in a compromising situation. I don't support believe 0:16:12.280 --> 0:16:15.520 all women. I believe listen to all women. But because 0:16:15.560 --> 0:16:17.760 of the racial, the ugly racial history in this country, 0:16:17.760 --> 0:16:20.040 when it comes to white women making false allegations against 0:16:20.080 --> 0:16:24.160 black men, I certainly understand hesitancy. What I don't understand 0:16:24.240 --> 0:16:28.640 is this immediate move to completely discard this woman's testimony 0:16:28.680 --> 0:16:31.000 of what happened to her. So now that the video 0:16:31.120 --> 0:16:33.160 is out, there has been some shift in the public 0:16:33.240 --> 0:16:35.720 narrative of you know, people saying, oh, this is horrific. 0:16:35.960 --> 0:16:38.560 But the sad part is, why did you need that video? 0:16:38.920 --> 0:16:41.560 Why was her testimony not enough? Why was him paying 0:16:41.600 --> 0:16:43.880 her not enough? And I really can't put a lot 0:16:43.920 --> 0:16:47.680 of credibility in shan Colm's pseudo apology. I say apology 0:16:47.680 --> 0:16:50.360 and quotes because it was not exactly an apology. And 0:16:50.560 --> 0:16:52.680 how seriously can we take you in just one month 0:16:52.680 --> 0:16:55.520 ago you were calling her a liar. Here's the sad fact. 0:16:55.600 --> 0:16:59.400 One in four women will face some sort of domestic 0:16:59.480 --> 0:17:03.360 violence in their lives from a partner. And this is 0:17:03.400 --> 0:17:08.280 something It can be mental abuse, physical abuse, stalking, any 0:17:08.359 --> 0:17:11.159 kind of thing. And sometimes, you know, we it's normalized 0:17:11.200 --> 0:17:13.240 in society with couples like you know, Blue Space and 0:17:13.320 --> 0:17:16.359 Chris Sean and you know, even Whitney and Bobby. You know, 0:17:16.480 --> 0:17:18.399 we kind of look at this train wreck of a 0:17:18.440 --> 0:17:20.439 couple and laugh at it. And you know, it was 0:17:20.480 --> 0:17:23.960 like these cultural touchstones and in our feed and in 0:17:24.040 --> 0:17:26.800 our you know, conversation at brunch, and we have to 0:17:26.800 --> 0:17:30.720 stop normalizing these kind of toxic interactions because it starts 0:17:30.760 --> 0:17:33.919 out as verbal toxicity and eventually it will end up 0:17:33.960 --> 0:17:37.679 as physical toxicity. And so there's a divide happening in 0:17:37.720 --> 0:17:40.639 our community between black men and black women that I 0:17:40.640 --> 0:17:44.400 think we have to address. But the most important thing 0:17:44.560 --> 0:17:48.480 is the domestic violence component. It is heartbreaking, and Cassie 0:17:48.560 --> 0:17:51.359 is re traumatized every time we watch this video. I 0:17:51.560 --> 0:17:53.479 haven't posted it, I haven't shared it. I invite other 0:17:53.520 --> 0:17:55.320 people not to post it or share it either, but 0:17:55.320 --> 0:17:57.240 it's heartbreaking to see what happened, and I hope that 0:17:57.280 --> 0:17:59.160 she's doing well. 0:17:59.040 --> 0:18:04.800 I feel so deeply for Cassie, and I have but 0:18:04.880 --> 0:18:07.240 I you know, on the one hand, and I agree 0:18:07.280 --> 0:18:11.560 like with the video not sharing it or like continuing 0:18:11.600 --> 0:18:13.680 to proliferate it, which of course we know it's going 0:18:13.760 --> 0:18:17.560 to happen anyway. But for Cassie and for other women 0:18:17.760 --> 0:18:21.480 like Cassie, you know, it's hard enough when speaking your 0:18:21.480 --> 0:18:25.399 truth is instantly like. It's that risk and reward of 0:18:25.440 --> 0:18:28.520 speaking out as a victim that I feel like, especially 0:18:28.520 --> 0:18:31.359 public women who are public figures like Cassie. I see 0:18:31.359 --> 0:18:34.360 why she wait until the deadline, you know, for that 0:18:34.840 --> 0:18:36.760 lawsuit to go for it, and I just think it 0:18:36.800 --> 0:18:41.439 takes so much bravery for her to come forward and 0:18:41.480 --> 0:18:46.040 then to endure you know, the the you know, the 0:18:46.080 --> 0:18:48.639 statements that Diddie has put out it. I don't know obviously, 0:18:48.680 --> 0:18:51.560 I don't know her, but to see him do these 0:18:51.640 --> 0:18:55.560 like half ass you know, defense and apologies and to 0:18:56.440 --> 0:19:00.360 see him come out this week post video and try 0:19:00.400 --> 0:19:04.840 to play the born again man like I have been 0:19:04.880 --> 0:19:07.520 seeking help. Why did you say that before? I don't 0:19:07.560 --> 0:19:11.920 know why the apology didn't come out before, like you said, well, 0:19:12.640 --> 0:19:15.040 the facts were there though, but something about the video, 0:19:15.080 --> 0:19:17.720 It's like people don't want to read and you know 0:19:17.760 --> 0:19:20.240 what I mean, the facts have been there, as Tiffany 0:19:20.280 --> 0:19:24.680 C said, but like he waited and I mean it completely. 0:19:24.800 --> 0:19:26.399 Like when I saw it pop up on my feed, 0:19:26.640 --> 0:19:29.919 I was so jarred and so angry. I was like, 0:19:29.920 --> 0:19:32.359 how do I block this man from anything else? And 0:19:32.480 --> 0:19:35.959 you know, ever, and at the same time, it's like, 0:19:36.400 --> 0:19:38.800 what what are the next steps? Like what do you 0:19:38.840 --> 0:19:40.639 think Tiffany C. But I mean, like you said, this 0:19:40.720 --> 0:19:44.240 is not the first black man to be found. We 0:19:44.280 --> 0:19:48.080 have r Kelly, we have Chris Brown. I mean, there's 0:19:48.080 --> 0:19:50.919 probably you know, and even now Drake is being accused 0:19:51.480 --> 0:19:54.359 in all this, Like obsession over this, These. 0:19:54.240 --> 0:19:58.560 Distracts feel well, yeah, Kendrick. So Drake accused Kendrick of 0:19:58.600 --> 0:20:02.800 beating his wife, Can is accusing of Drake of pedophilia, 0:20:03.440 --> 0:20:07.280 and you know, and you mentioned Tiffany r. Kelly and 0:20:07.600 --> 0:20:10.520 Bill Cosby, and you know it's like, look, black women 0:20:10.560 --> 0:20:13.119 aren't the butt of your jokes, you know. And I 0:20:13.119 --> 0:20:16.240 think we are more than a punchline and a rat beef. 0:20:16.280 --> 0:20:20.160 And so I would challenge both Drake and Kendrick if 0:20:20.160 --> 0:20:23.800 you knew about this, you know, why is it came 0:20:23.840 --> 0:20:26.320 out in a rap beef? Not that you know. Kendrick 0:20:26.400 --> 0:20:28.359 is you know, supposed to police Drake, but it's like 0:20:28.400 --> 0:20:31.439 anybody who bore witness to this kind of violence. Because 0:20:31.440 --> 0:20:34.239 what struck me about this video is Diddy did it 0:20:34.280 --> 0:20:37.480 with such ease and barbarism that it was not the 0:20:37.520 --> 0:20:41.240 first time. You know, he did that with impunity, like 0:20:41.280 --> 0:20:43.240 he knew he would not get caught. So I this 0:20:43.280 --> 0:20:45.720 is my speculation. I don't have any reporting on this. 0:20:45.840 --> 0:20:47.879 That's just you know that he's done it again. But 0:20:47.920 --> 0:20:50.639 when you watch it, it was done with familiarity. And so 0:20:50.880 --> 0:20:53.639 it makes me question when we're you know, out bobbing 0:20:53.680 --> 0:20:55.560 our heads and having a good time, and everybody's writing 0:20:55.600 --> 0:21:00.159 thirty different think pieces on Drake and Kendrick that nobody 0:21:00.320 --> 0:21:03.120 made the point about, Well, wait a second, if y'all 0:21:03.200 --> 0:21:07.280 knew about women being mistreated, why didn't anybody say anything? 0:21:07.520 --> 0:21:10.439 Be it someone in your entourage, their entourage? What have 0:21:10.480 --> 0:21:12.840 you bore witness to? And what are we not hearing 0:21:12.920 --> 0:21:15.240 right now as we three ladies sit here and talk. 0:21:15.359 --> 0:21:18.520 Someone is not safe right now. And it could be 0:21:18.560 --> 0:21:20.960 someone who doesn't have agency over their own life, a 0:21:21.080 --> 0:21:22.760 child and a home. And if that's the case, and 0:21:22.760 --> 0:21:25.600