Speaker 1: I love Hotacopy so much. I've known her forever. She
Speaker 1: is a broadcast journalist, a television personality, and an author.
Speaker 1: Hoda joined NBC in nineteen ninety eight as a correspondent,
Speaker 1: which has now led her in her role as a
Speaker 1: main co anchor of NBC's Today Show and co host
Speaker 1: of its entertainment focused Fourth Hour. Ho To takes pride
Speaker 1: in being a mother to her two beautiful daughters. We're
Speaker 1: live from thirty Rock. This is just be with Hotacopy.
Speaker 1: Let's get into it. So I'm very excited live for Hoda. Yeah,
Speaker 1: let's get into it.
Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, Hoda.
Speaker 1: You're not doing the interviewing today, are you sure?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 3: I want you to say something. Watch me because I'm
Speaker 3: good at switching it around.
Speaker 1: And you decent. You have some experience. Okay, So when
Speaker 1: did we first? Mean? How long ago do we meet?
Speaker 1: I think I did a segment with you. I think
Speaker 1: that's the first time.
Speaker 3: I think the very first time you were on the
Speaker 3: Today Show was that when.
Speaker 2: You and Martha Stewart refuding? Or was it before that?
Speaker 1: Wow? That's a good Why was I on when we
Speaker 1: were fused?
Speaker 3: I just remember that you were the thing you became
Speaker 3: the thing. In the very beginning, I knew you were scared,
Speaker 3: which I when I think of you now, I think
Speaker 3: of you as this ball of confidence, just like ruling
Speaker 3: the world. But I do remember when you were just
Speaker 3: coming into the Today Show, and I cannot remember the date,
Speaker 3: but I do remember the feeling. It was like you
Speaker 3: wanted everything to be just right.
Speaker 1: I did have index cards and I came in and
Speaker 1: we were doing a food segment about like your food personality.
Speaker 1: We went down that same swervy line we went down
Speaker 1: today weird like ye did snake tables, so like, and
Speaker 1: let's move next to the next station. But I'm trying
Speaker 1: to think about where you were in your life now,
Speaker 1: because back then I thought of you in a similar
Speaker 1: way that I do now, Like your hoe A copy.
Speaker 1: You know, you're a big deal, and you've evolved so
Speaker 1: much in your career. So where that was, Let's say
Speaker 1: that was like fifteen years ago, I want to say,
Speaker 1: because I didn't have we didn't have children, I didn't
Speaker 1: have Britain. You came out to the Hamptons. I have
Speaker 1: pictures of.
Speaker 3: Us, yes, pattle baby beach, yes.
Speaker 1: And we went on my beach and we had all
Speaker 1: these conversations and we listened to Bruno Mars. It was
Speaker 1: when one of his first albums came out, and we
Speaker 1: were just like free in a different way.
Speaker 3: Imber I the feeling of no kids, no worries, no nothing,
Speaker 3: you don't even know.
Speaker 2: That you're free.
Speaker 3: But I think I was always so fascinated by you,
Speaker 3: and I think it was because I had never met
Speaker 3: anyone who was fearless. I don't think i'd ever spoken
Speaker 3: to anyone who, to me, felt fearless. And you always
Speaker 3: had this thing. And I remember thinking to myself, I
Speaker 3: don't know if that's confidence. I don't know what it is,
Speaker 3: but you were yourself. And I think as women and
Speaker 3: me personally, it takes so long to find your voice,
Speaker 3: to say what you want to say, to come out
Speaker 3: with it.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 1: But why why do you think I'm trying to think about?
Speaker 1: I think I watch people turn themselves inside out to
Speaker 1: be something that they're not, and it seems so much
Speaker 1: more exhausting. So why, Like I was watching the Mary
Speaker 1: Tyler Moore you saw the documentary, I'm sure, and I
Speaker 1: probably thought so much about a man career, life and feminism.
Speaker 1: So why do you think women aren't just able to
Speaker 1: be themselves. You think they don't know who they are yet,
Speaker 1: or they're trying to be what everyone else wants them
Speaker 1: to be because of the construct.
Speaker 3: I think it is like innately I was and no longer,
Speaker 3: but I was a pleaser, like I wanted to be liked,
Speaker 3: and I thought that made life so much easier. And
Speaker 3: to say something brave, to say I don't like that,
Speaker 3: or to speak up takes a lot of courage. And
Speaker 3: I sat quietly through most of my career and may
Speaker 3: aid much less than my co anchor much less, probably
Speaker 3: half if that.
Speaker 2: And you knew that, And there are times when I.
Speaker 1: Knew it, And what did you feel every day about it?
Speaker 1: What did you or did you think that's just the
Speaker 1: way it was?
Speaker 3: That I kind of thought it was the way it was,
Speaker 3: but I was all. I also tried really hard not
Speaker 3: to think about it, because I think you would start
Speaker 3: resenting You're like, but wait, I work longer hours, I
Speaker 3: do more, And I think it took me until I'm
Speaker 3: not kidding, probably like ten years ago, ten years ago,
Speaker 3: to finally say uncle, like that's enough, I'm going to
Speaker 3: get I'm going to get what I deserve to get paid,
Speaker 3: but I think I always felt lucky to be in
Speaker 3: the room.
Speaker 1: Like, oh, by the way, I was going to say
Speaker 1: that hat Listen, I got my first season with seven
Speaker 1: tho twohundred fifty dollars on the house was but you.
Speaker 2: Wait, wait, seven thousand was your first.
Speaker 1: Hundred fifty dollars for the first season. But I didn't
Speaker 1: care because I want I was good. Let me have
Speaker 1: the back end. Like in my mind, I'm saying, don't
Speaker 1: you think that maybe you felt really lucky to be
Speaker 1: in the room, and then you later thought you had leverage,
Speaker 1: like you start to think like I'm smart, I know
Speaker 1: when I can when my call, when I have a
Speaker 1: good hand.
Speaker 3: It took me a long time to realize that because
Speaker 3: when you work with iconic people, you always feel less
Speaker 3: than I think, like I worked with Kathy Lee, and
Speaker 3: that's like.
Speaker 2: Sitting next to a legend.
Speaker 3: Sorry, you can't even believe that you got the seat.
Speaker 1: The dynamic was set up in the beginning. It's the
Speaker 1: way it is with a parent, like sometimes a parent
Speaker 1: or a teacher or somebody who it's me and Martha Stewart. Frankly, yeah,
Speaker 1: if I would have to fight the urge to to
Speaker 1: not to feel like to cower, but then to overcome
Speaker 1: it by somehow being stronger. And it's this whole dynamic
Speaker 1: and dynamics are set up in our child.
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, and I think with cath and I remember
Speaker 3: this really well. I was hosting with Natalie Morales and
Speaker 3: Ann Curry. It was the three of us. That's how
Speaker 3: that hour started. And we were hosting together. And one
Speaker 3: day they were both out sick, and Amy Rosenblum and
Speaker 3: I were in a restaurant. We were at Michael's and
Speaker 3: we walked by and we're like, is that Kathy Lake
Speaker 3: get heard at the table over there? Oh my god,
Speaker 3: it's Kathy Lee. Amy was like, I'm gonna, I'm gonna,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go over it.
Speaker 2: Let's go over.
Speaker 3: We love you and we love you.
Speaker 2: And she was like, oh thank you.
Speaker 3: And Amy goes, can you co host?
Speaker 2: Are you free one day? And she said, I'm very busy.
Speaker 2: I don't know if I can.
Speaker 3: Amy just said one day, and I just I met her.
Speaker 3: I just watched her with reg like we did. We're like,
Speaker 3: oh no. So the next a week later, she came
Speaker 3: on the show.
Speaker 2: Her boobs were out, her cleavage was out, she.
Speaker 3: Was running around, she had that big hair, and she
Speaker 3: was just delighting everybody.
Speaker 2: And I was mesmerized.
Speaker 3: I was like, who is this force of freaking nature?
Speaker 1: Really?
Speaker 3: The energy she blew the place up so much so
Speaker 3: that the that the big guns from thirty Rock came
Speaker 3: over all the execs, well, Kathy Loo you know and
Speaker 3: all that, and a little while later they were like,
Speaker 3: we want her to host.
Speaker 1: Oh my god.
Speaker 3: And so they originally they said, okay, you'll host, Kathy
Speaker 3: Lil host, and then we'll bring in some buddy.
Speaker 2: We'll see who to host with.
Speaker 3: And she said, Kathie Lee said, after our one hosting day,
Speaker 3: she said, if it's not Hoda, I'm not going to
Speaker 3: do it.
Speaker 1: Oh well, that's the beginning of some leverage there.
Speaker 2: So she also chose me.
Speaker 3: So when someone chooses you too, like she chose me,
Speaker 3: and I am like forever grateful. I still remember going
Speaker 3: out to her house and I was talking to Frank,
Speaker 3: her husband, Frank Gifford at the time, and I mean,
Speaker 3: and he said, I'm going to tell you how this
Speaker 3: is going to work, if this is going to work
Speaker 3: for you and my wife, And I.
Speaker 2: Said, okay, because I'm all yours.
Speaker 3: And he said, you have to trust someone to catch
Speaker 3: you when you fall. And she's the most trustworthy person
Speaker 3: I've ever.
Speaker 2: Known in my life.
Speaker 1: Wow, that's so deep.
Speaker 3: And if you are like that at all, it will
Speaker 3: work because she'll catch you. And you know what she did. Wow,
Speaker 3: over and over again. And I think when you work
Speaker 3: with someone like that and all of a sudden you
Speaker 3: feel safe. I think about when you feel safe.
Speaker 1: I know that's so yea, that is so mad is
Speaker 1: so I didn't know that it's so powerful. Wow, wow,
Speaker 1: And I see, I just see this. So I remember
Speaker 1: when we were sitting in the Hantons and you had
Speaker 1: been married prior, and you had been through health issues
Speaker 1: and like I don't want to say you were you
Speaker 1: were pleasing. You were very pleasing. And I can now
Speaker 1: that I were deconstructing this, see that, Like I remember
Speaker 1: you always it seemed you told me that Ann Curry
Speaker 1: told you one person at a time. I always remember
Speaker 1: that like that, that you shake one hand at a time,
Speaker 1: you connect with one person at a time, and have
Speaker 1: always seen you. Yeah, Like I wish I had more
Speaker 1: of that because I'm moving so quickly and you always
Speaker 1: stop and connect and it's really and I do believe
Speaker 1: you can build a whole career and life off of that.
Speaker 1: And but maybe back then you were giving more than
Speaker 1: you were even giving yourself. I do really remember that,
Speaker 1: the energy about it.
Speaker 2: I remembered.
Speaker 3: I mean, I was when we knew each other. I
Speaker 3: was back then, I was sick with breast cancer and
Speaker 3: I was going through or had just been through a divorce.
Speaker 3: And I remembered thinking because he wasn't there when I
Speaker 3: was sick, and that was very it was just like
Speaker 3: piercing to me. But I remembered in that moment thinking
Speaker 3: to myself, like I might had I not gotten sick,
Speaker 3: I might have stayed.
Speaker 2: With him, and that would not have been the right
Speaker 2: decision to.
Speaker 3: Make, because I think I saw myself as an optimist,
Speaker 3: and I thought that was a good thing. Optimists make
Speaker 3: things work, Optimists get things done. Optimists will put a
Speaker 3: circle in a square.
Speaker 1: We'll solve the problem. But you're not. It's not about
Speaker 1: how you feel you're going to fix this.
Speaker 2: I can do it. I can do it nowhere. I'm
Speaker 2: not a quitter.
Speaker 3: I'm not a quar It's like, dude, some things don't work,
Speaker 3: and that doesn't make you not optimistic. It just makes
Speaker 3: you realize something isn't right.
Speaker 1: Well, be happy works, Yeah, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: Being happy works. And I think I see you you
Speaker 1: really really have embraced parenthood, like you understand the gift
Speaker 1: that it is. Like that's when you really realize what
Speaker 1: love really is. I'm gonna cry. And then I think
Speaker 1: that you, like me, I wanted to sort of be
Speaker 1: saved by some man. You're gonna be some like great
Speaker 1: guy who had everything going for you for them, and
Speaker 1: I was kind of going to complete you like Renee Zelweger.
Speaker 1: And I feel like motherhood really did that for you,
Speaker 1: Like you don't feel the same quote unquote need to
Speaker 1: meet someone. Back then, it might have been a need.
Speaker 1: Now it's a one.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's that's exactly it. That's exactly it.
Speaker 3: I think, I think motherhood and you know with Brinn,
Speaker 3: just what it feels like every day. I mean, my
Speaker 3: God beyond.
Speaker 2: But I think when you.
Speaker 3: Realize that that wasn't meant for you, or you think
Speaker 3: that at least initially, it's a terrifying part of life
Speaker 3: because you have to face it. And I remembered never
Speaker 3: saying out loud that I wanted kids, never because it
Speaker 3: was too late. So for girls who it's too late for,
Speaker 3: you don't say it because if you say it, you're
Speaker 3: expressing something that you're never going to get. It's like
Speaker 3: saying I'm gonna be an astronaut. It's like you're never
Speaker 3: It's never gonna happen. And I still remember this day
Speaker 3: like it was yesterday. I was walking through the Hamptons
Speaker 3: with my friend Jen and she just casually said, well,
Speaker 3: we never wanted kids, and I stopped and I looked
Speaker 3: at her and I go, I actually did. And she goes,
Speaker 3: you never said that, and I said, because it can't
Speaker 3: be so I'm not. I'm just I've just said it.
Speaker 3: And I couldn't believe I said it out loud. And
Speaker 3: all of a sudden, when you say something out loud.
Speaker 1: You put it into the universe. Yes, you put it
Speaker 1: out there.
Speaker 3: And then everywhere I looked I saw a sign that
Speaker 3: it was possible. I saw an interview that Sandra Bullock did.
Speaker 3: She was like, oh, when I was, you know, fifty,
Speaker 3: I decided I was going to I was like, you
Speaker 3: can do that.
Speaker 2: Look at that. And then I saw this scene.
Speaker 3: This was a horrible scene. It was from like Syria
Speaker 3: or some war torn area, and there was a little
Speaker 3: boy and I still remember him. He was like dusk
Speaker 3: and it was all by himself, and I was like,
Speaker 3: maybe there's a kid who needs me. Like I thought
Speaker 3: that too, and I was like I saw that kid,
Speaker 3: and I was like that child, you know, I don't
Speaker 3: know it, you know, if it's possible. And then all
Speaker 3: of a sudden, I just kept everything. It's like when
Speaker 3: you want to buy a red car and all you
Speaker 3: see red cars, and it's like that's all I could see,
Speaker 3: and so.
Speaker 1: Well, then you kick in. Then you're good at that.
Speaker 1: Now you can yes, once you had a problem to solve,
Speaker 1: that's not the problem. Just accepting, accepting it, do it.
Speaker 3: And I still remember the moment because I filled out
Speaker 3: all the paperwork and did all the stuff that you do,
Speaker 3: and then they're like, okay, maybe a year, maybe six months,
Speaker 3: maybe five years, good luck, bye bye. And I was
Speaker 3: sitting in my office where we just were, and I remember,
Speaker 3: like it was yesterday. I was sitting there and I
Speaker 3: was doing some phone call with some nutritionness about something,
Speaker 3: and I just remember it was just you know, babbling
Speaker 3: on and on, and my phone beeped and I looked
Speaker 3: at it and it was a text and it was
Speaker 3: it said Ashley, and Ashley was the lady from my
Speaker 3: adoption agents, and she said if I ever text you,
Speaker 3: you need to call me back immediately. I saw her name.
Speaker 3: I hung up the phone. I took a yellow pad out.
Speaker 3: I looked at the clock and I wrote eleven fifty five.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I said, this is the moment everything changes.
Speaker 3: I knew it, and so I took a deep breath.
Speaker 2: The number I go, I said, Ashley, and she goes.
Speaker 2: She said two words to me, she said, she's here.
Speaker 2: I know.
Speaker 3: I was weeping, and I thought to myself, in that moment,
Speaker 3: she's here.
Speaker 2: I don't know what birth feels like, and I bet
Speaker 2: it was amazing. But this was really close. And I
Speaker 2: remember the feeling like like it was yesterday.
Speaker 1: I love you, Oh my god, I really feel you,
Speaker 1: like my bones. Because it was also a release for you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like it was a loud Yeah.
Speaker 2: It was amazing.
Speaker 3: Anyway, so it came, it happened anyway, but that but
Speaker 3: like to understand that, like, so it's sort of like
Speaker 3: it reminded me that if you ever have a dream
Speaker 3: or whatever it is, maybe it's not for a kid.
Speaker 3: Maybe it's for something else, but it's like whisper it
Speaker 3: even in the mirror by yourself. It doesn't matter where
Speaker 3: you do it, to a friend, you know, somebody or nobody,
Speaker 3: or to yourself. But once it's out, it's out. And
Speaker 3: I can't even believe I'm sitting here now with a
Speaker 3: six year old and a.
Speaker 2: Four year old. I have two children. Who are my kids?
Speaker 3: I mean, I always said I wanted to be a teacher,
Speaker 3: but I think I really wanted to be a teacher
Speaker 3: because I wanted kids. Like I always said that when
Speaker 3: I'm done in NBC, I'm gonna be a teacher. And
Speaker 3: then one day I was like, I think being a
Speaker 3: teacher is amazing, but I think the need it was
Speaker 3: in need to do that because I couldn't get close enough.
Speaker 3: You know, Hey, guys, it's Hota Kopy from the Today Show.
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Speaker 3: Oprah Winfrey, Mel Robbins, and so many more.
Speaker 2: Hear how they found the strength to make changes.
Speaker 3: In their lives and how you could do it too.
Speaker 3: All of them inspire me today. Listen to all three
Speaker 3: seasons of Making Space with Koto Kape available now. Just
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Speaker 1: And you have a very It's such a cliche thing
Speaker 1: to say, but you have a very normal life. Ironically,
Speaker 1: you really do. Like you love going to Rehoboth and
Speaker 1: you want to be in a family and going on
Speaker 1: the bar walk and people leave you alone, engage with you.
Speaker 1: But like you found the balance is the biggest joke
Speaker 1: of a question. But I think if you're present in
Speaker 1: each area of your life, you can accomplish this. I
Speaker 1: think it's entirely possible. Yes, And you're able to be
Speaker 1: so present here and then present there. You don't seem
Speaker 1: to feel the guilt.
Speaker 2: Do you.
Speaker 3: No, I don't, And I'll tell you My mom worked,
Speaker 3: so I don't. I mean she was a working mom,
Speaker 3: so she went to work, and I go to work,
Speaker 3: and I tell my kids I love work and I
Speaker 3: love you so much more. But I want them to
Speaker 3: find something they love. But I think what I do,
Speaker 3: what I try to do, is a real kind of
Speaker 3: be here now situation all the time, and I'm not
Speaker 3: always great at it, but I really try, because like yesterday.
Speaker 3: I mean, I had a horrible parenting day on Sunday.
Speaker 3: No one would go to sleep. I lost it. I
Speaker 3: lost it. It was not pretty right. I hated myself.
Speaker 3: I went to bed. You're the worst, You're the worst.
Speaker 3: You're the worst. And then the next day I woke
Speaker 3: up and I said, I wrote my little journal. I
Speaker 3: was like, Dear God, thank you for a brand new day,
Speaker 3: a day that will never come this way again, or redo,
Speaker 3: a chance for another try. And yet I couldn't shake it.
Speaker 2: You know when you just can't shake it.
Speaker 3: So I take the subway because I like the vibe.
Speaker 3: So I was on the subway and I had this
Speaker 3: weird epiphany and I was like, what if I was
Speaker 3: eighty years old? And I was told God said, you
Speaker 3: know what, you can come back for one day with
Speaker 3: your kids when they were little, and this is the day.
Speaker 2: You get one day to.
Speaker 3: Relive what it was like when your kids were little,
Speaker 3: and this is that day. So on the subway, my
Speaker 3: back got straight or I was like, this is I
Speaker 3: imagined it. I was like, this is the day.
Speaker 2: I took a deep breath.
Speaker 3: I went to pick both kids up from school. Hope
Speaker 3: he was telling me all about her day and why
Speaker 3: she loves her meat sticks or whatever she was eating,
Speaker 3: I can't remember. And then we rode to Haley school
Speaker 3: and Haley came running out and I was like, this
Speaker 3: is I get this day again?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 3: And I think sometimes I, you know, like all of us,
Speaker 3: we get all buried in, you know, minutia and stuff,
Speaker 3: and stressful day at works means a stressful day at home.
Speaker 2: And it doesn't.
Speaker 1: Work when you're a little snappy, you're a little impatient.
Speaker 3: And I need to be like that, and I feel
Speaker 3: like it's not me and I want to get rid
Speaker 3: of that part of me because when you wait so
Speaker 3: long for something, it's and you do and you and
Speaker 3: you have a bad day.
Speaker 2: It's a bummer.
Speaker 1: It is. But they're not made of glass. They're not
Speaker 1: made of glass there, you know what I mean? You
Speaker 1: could it's and they see they want to see flaws.
Speaker 1: You're not supposed to be perfect, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: You're not supposed to be perfect at all my opinion,
Speaker 1: and I feel the same way. I think it's the
Speaker 1: presence because I've read a statistic about women in the
Speaker 1: fifties that spent they said they spent less time with
Speaker 1: kids than working moms now because it was smoking a cigaretteesrink
Speaker 1: the wine in the kitchen and let the kid run
Speaker 1: out free range parenting, running with the other chickens in
Speaker 1: the road. So like you didn't see until eight o'clock
Speaker 1: at night.
Speaker 2: Do you know what I mean? Where do you get
Speaker 2: it now? It's so bizarre, you the funniest, So like
Speaker 2: they didn't.
Speaker 1: So we're sting.
Speaker 2: We're spending more time, and we're obsessed.
Speaker 1: With everything being perfect and we're gonna you.
Speaker 3: Know, I think we're messing them up. Like I think
Speaker 3: about this sometimes. Do you want the red pen of
Speaker 3: the purple pen? Do you want the blueberry or the raspberry?
Speaker 1: Well, I'm not because I'm half a sea.
Speaker 2: I'm not.
Speaker 1: I'm I'm like tough titty, tough titty.
Speaker 2: Were you ever like that? Did you ever say, Brent,
Speaker 2: would you like an apple or a pear?
Speaker 1: No? No, I wasn't, but I wanted to. I always
Speaker 1: want to get her what she wants, and I want
Speaker 1: to mean she has a great life, and I go,
Speaker 1: but then there's the line, and when it bends, it bends.
Speaker 1: If it breaks, all how she knows, and I'll look
Speaker 1: at her and she'll be like, oh, now, screwed. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I have a line. I am strict, indulgent. There's a
Speaker 1: line and you cross it and everyone's Christmas is canceled,
Speaker 1: everyone's going home. So yeah, but you know what I mean. Like,
Speaker 1: but I think that the being present thing was the
Speaker 1: key I was on. You always get the same dumb
Speaker 1: question about the bell, and then one day I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm here, and I like what you said. I love working, yeah,
Speaker 1: and I love being a parent. And if you're torn
Speaker 1: in both, than you really messed up. If you're on
Speaker 1: the Today's Show looking at your phone and worried or
Speaker 1: with your kid in the bathtub, and then you gotta.
Speaker 2: Be you gotta be there. That is funny. So yeah,
Speaker 2: I didn't know you were such a strict parent.
Speaker 1: I'm scary, you know what I mean, as you can imagine,
Speaker 1: Not not like I'm strict, but it's a little I'm
Speaker 1: a little scary. Like there's a line and we're all
Speaker 1: happy and everyone's having a good time, but when we
Speaker 1: crossed that line, no, thank you, that was unacceptable. Like
Speaker 1: there's a line.
Speaker 3: You think when you think about some I'm not generalizing,
Speaker 3: but I do think some kids who were raised with
Speaker 3: the red pen, blue pen, purple you on a purple crayon.
Speaker 2: And then you get into the workforce.
Speaker 1: You mean like everybody gets in. Yeah, I'm not that parent.
Speaker 3: Well, I think when those kids get into the workforce,
Speaker 3: it's hard because they're used to having choices and things.
Speaker 3: I feel like us were raised kind of more with animals.
Speaker 2: Yeah, wolves, you know what I mean. It's like because I.
Speaker 3: Said so, there's no I mean, I couldn't. I wasn't
Speaker 3: allow to yell or stomp up the stairs. I screamed
Speaker 3: into a pillow for years when I was a kid.
Speaker 3: You just couldn't let it out. It was like it dad, Now,
Speaker 3: that wasn't a great way to grow.
Speaker 1: To No, you want to live in fear. However, my
Speaker 1: daughter doesn't really live in fear.
Speaker 3: But however, you can navigate the world, and you can
Speaker 3: go to therapy as a grown up. But I think
Speaker 3: the kids who have a million choices sometimes I wonder
Speaker 3: if your job is to prepare them for adulthood and
Speaker 3: get them ready so for rejection and for no, you
Speaker 3: don't always get it.
Speaker 2: Actually you're not gonna get it. You're no.
Speaker 1: Well, that's why so many Harvard graduates don't find the
Speaker 1: great jobs because they were told their whole life, you're brilliant.
Speaker 2: You're smart.
Speaker 1: To going to Harvard, it's amazing, WinCE. Parents are impressed
Speaker 1: and then they get out and like life is tough
Speaker 1: no matter.
Speaker 2: What school you are. Yeah, yeah, if you.
Speaker 1: Didn't go, if you went, so I agree with you.
Speaker 1: Yeah no, I'm like she would you know, mommy, I'm
Speaker 1: not good at the sport or something, and I'll set
Speaker 1: her up to succeed. But if she's not practicing a lot,
Speaker 1: or if she's not doing well, I'll say, like, this
Speaker 1: person's great, like they are. You're great at something, You're
Speaker 1: not gonna be great at everything. And listen, you're not
Speaker 1: gonna be You might not be an NBA player. You
Speaker 1: should practice, feel good about yourself, build yourself up, set
Speaker 1: yourself to succeed. But it's okay you're not and not
Speaker 1: everybody to metal and that everyone hits a run, and
Speaker 1: I think it's great to let them. Yeah, No, totally important,
Speaker 1: and it's sometimes it is the tough shit program. You know,
Speaker 1: I'm very indulgent, but I think you're right with what
Speaker 1: you're saying. It's what you're saying is it's hard to
Speaker 1: raise a child when you've kind of paved the way
Speaker 1: for them a little bit financially, and the way that
Speaker 1: you travel and the things that you just naturally do.
Speaker 1: We get to do things that other kids and parents
Speaker 1: don't get to do. If it could be meeting Santa
Speaker 1: Claus without having to sit on the line or whatever
Speaker 1: the thing is. And I often think about that, like,
Speaker 1: she doesn't have the same struggles, right, and yet she's
Speaker 1: also not a nervous wreck half the time like I am.
Speaker 1: She's more free. So I think it goes both ways.
Speaker 1: You have to balance that. I think. So are you
Speaker 1: still as driven with work? Like what now? Because for me,
Speaker 1: I'm I don't want to say the back nine. That's depressing.
Speaker 1: But you know, I think about I feel sometimes retired,
Speaker 1: Like sometimes I don't have to do anything if I
Speaker 1: don't want. Most a lot of times I do think
Speaker 1: because I want to, but most of the time I
Speaker 1: don't really have to. And you work in a corporate environment.
Speaker 3: You have.
Speaker 1: Gone all the way up the chain and you still have,
Speaker 1: you know, people to answer to and laws to abide
Speaker 1: by in the workplace, and you have to play the game.
Speaker 1: You're still playing the corporate game. And you have a
Speaker 1: lot of freedom. So how do you stay motivated a
Speaker 1: to be here? And what does it all mean? Because
Speaker 1: as we get older, I think you're thinking, what am
Speaker 1: I doing?
Speaker 2: What is this?
Speaker 1: What we Why are we here? Why are we working?
Speaker 1: Why we're not working? What should we be doing? Is
Speaker 1: this purposeful?
Speaker 3: I do think, I do think we all start to question,
Speaker 3: like our purpose, like why, because.
Speaker 2: You're here for You're here for a reason, I mean.
Speaker 3: And that's important. And sometimes I think I'm on the market.
Speaker 3: Sometimes I think I'm missing it. I think that made
Speaker 3: my The thing that made my career interesting and makes
Speaker 3: it interesting here is I don't think I've ever had
Speaker 3: the same job for that long a period of time.
Speaker 3: I mean long in regular people's but not in this world.
Speaker 3: So I worked a dateline for ten eleven years or
Speaker 3: whatever it was. That was a whole career in dateline.
Speaker 3: Then I got the job with kath So I worked
Speaker 3: with Kathy Lee on the ten.
Speaker 1: For and that was risky. That was like, now we
Speaker 1: can think it's all fun and games, but that was risky.
Speaker 1: That's not a normal transition.
Speaker 3: Well what was weird was, first of all, she chose me,
Speaker 3: and secondly, as you know what, I'd spent my whole
Speaker 3: career doing hard news, like I was in Afghanistan and
Speaker 3: I went to all to Iraq when this when Saddam
Speaker 3: Hussein statue fell, and I was in all the places,
Speaker 3: and we were in the West Bank and Gaza and
Speaker 3: they were shooting all over like all that stuff I
Speaker 3: was doing, and then all of a sudden, I was
Speaker 3: going to like this, laughing and scratching.
Speaker 1: All of a sudden, you were doing Rose all day,
Speaker 1: like from Afghanistan to Rose all day, right.
Speaker 3: And I wasn't sure, like when you do all that
Speaker 3: work pre game, is that the right path, because you
Speaker 3: don't know. But one thing I did know was when
Speaker 3: I sat with Kathy Lee, I was happy. And when
Speaker 3: I was in those scary places, I was putting a
Speaker 3: circle on a square. I was trying to be a
Speaker 3: war correspondent. I was trying to be the person who
Speaker 3: interviewed all these, you know, different kinds of people. I
Speaker 3: tried to sit across from people in Rikers Island who
Speaker 3: had you know, killed their whoever, and interviewed them. But
Speaker 3: deep down, I don't that was not hitting for me.
Speaker 3: I could do it, and I enjoyed human nature and
Speaker 3: why good for you?
Speaker 1: Yeah, you also probably it was probably a little trapping.
Speaker 1: I mean the story you just told, I think you're
Speaker 1: a messenger. The story you told before about it just
Speaker 1: will inspire so many people about doing something that they
Speaker 1: thought didn't apply to them, but that they couldn't do it.
Speaker 1: Every day, you're you always have some pearl of wisdom
Speaker 1: or some message. You're very very strong messenger. And I
Speaker 1: feel like maybe reporting news with facts and details can
Speaker 1: probably be constricting and so serious that you have ah
Speaker 1: other part of you. It's not an easy transition to
Speaker 1: make because you probably thought, am I going to be
Speaker 1: taken seriously? I tried to go in the other direction.
Speaker 1: I've tried to be the person on train Wreck television
Speaker 1: and then rinse with your technique that you taught us
Speaker 1: on television, soap and water to wash dishes. So I
Speaker 1: tried to then rinse my own career and be taken
Speaker 1: seriously with business. And you know, and it's not that easy.
Speaker 1: That's different.
Speaker 2: It's hard. It's hard both ways.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you tried to fall up. You tried to fuck
Speaker 1: up a whole wet dream is what you tried to do.
Speaker 1: You were like, I have a very serious career. I've
Speaker 1: taken serious. I'm doing hard news, or I could sit
Speaker 1: down and do cheese and wine with Kathy two literally.
Speaker 3: Did I realized that when you're happy, everything in life
Speaker 3: is better. And all of a sudden, I felt like
Speaker 3: I'd been swimming upstream my whole life, and suddenly I
Speaker 3: was riding a wave. And I didn't even know what
Speaker 3: riding away felt like. I thought life was always swimming upstream.
Speaker 3: I thought it was supposed to be a struggle. I
Speaker 3: thought I was supposed to have notts in my stomach.
Speaker 3: I thought it was supposed to be scared.
Speaker 2: Am I going to do it?
Speaker 3: I thought I was always supposed to feel that way,
Speaker 3: because when you do something that's meaningful, it must be hard.
Speaker 2: Well that's not true.
Speaker 1: Right, No, that's not true. And also I feel like
Speaker 1: this place because we're here at NBC, I think this
Speaker 1: place has allowed you to be a Swiss army knife,
Speaker 1: Like they need you to report on something very seriously.
Speaker 1: You're here, do it like you have every single you
Speaker 1: can do a cooking segment, you could talk to Jenna,
Speaker 1: you could talk about serious medical issues, talk about it.
Speaker 1: I mean, that's like you've been an amazing asset and
Speaker 1: they've allowed you to. That's pretty you know, I.
Speaker 2: Think because my career kept changing.
Speaker 3: So then after Kathy Lee, that was when everything happened
Speaker 3: here with Matt and then I ended up doing anchoring
Speaker 3: with Savannah and that's been a whole new I think
Speaker 3: we've been five years, is that right? So that's only
Speaker 3: been augh that's been five So when you think about it,
Speaker 3: each chapter has been different, and I think that's why
Speaker 3: it's still It's always.
Speaker 2: Been fun for me.
Speaker 1: It felt like you're on a new show, like.
Speaker 2: Oh, what's this show?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 3: Because being you know, being on the seven is a
Speaker 3: whole different ballgame, and it has its heavy stuff because
Speaker 3: you're setting the tone for the day. But you get
Speaker 3: to you know, all the A listers love to be
Speaker 3: on the eight and it's fun to sit with them
Speaker 3: and you get you get a good mix and Jenna
Speaker 3: and I it's a much looser vibe and a hole
Speaker 3: just to hang.
Speaker 2: So that's different. So I think I think it's.
Speaker 3: Felt that way, but I do I do want to
Speaker 3: make sure that in my life, Like I feel like
Speaker 3: there's a really good saying if you have a little,
Speaker 3: give a little, and if you have a lot give
Speaker 3: a lot, like you have to, you have to walk
Speaker 3: the walk, and it's not you know, the idea of
Speaker 3: having something bigger, having something more is not appealing to.
Speaker 2: Me at all. I don't want anything more than what
Speaker 2: I have.
Speaker 1: I love that nobody has anything that you want.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's how I feel exactly.
Speaker 1: I feel exactly you. It's what you're you're doing, what
Speaker 1: you want or what feels added.
Speaker 3: But like you that I like it right, and I don't.
Speaker 3: It's like that analogy of you know, how some people
Speaker 3: like I was. There's this story of a little kid
Speaker 3: who's running down the street and he's having so much fun.
Speaker 3: He's on the sidewalk and he's running and he's like,
Speaker 3: this is the best. Look how fast I'm running. And
Speaker 3: he looks over at the sidewalk on the other side
Speaker 3: the street and there's another kid running, and all of
Speaker 3: a sudden he realizes they're kind of racing, and he's like, oh,
Speaker 3: I gotta keep And then all of a sudden, it
Speaker 3: went from this blissful, beautiful moment to now this kid's faster.
Speaker 3: So he hangs he stops and he hangs his head.
Speaker 3: I'm slow, I'm no good A run your race, like
Speaker 3: stop looking at the kid on the other side of
Speaker 3: the sidewalk.
Speaker 2: And I feel that way about life.
Speaker 3: It's like you walk into Howard Stearn's house and it's
Speaker 3: so fancy and you say, oh god, why don't I
Speaker 3: have Italian marble? No, like, that's not it. And then
Speaker 3: what like you're insatiable. You'll have your whole life going
Speaker 3: do they have copper piping at their house?
Speaker 1: But it's great to not have that, to just not
Speaker 1: want care.
Speaker 2: I know, I know who cares.
Speaker 1: I don't people care deeply? Why because it's the scoreboard
Speaker 1: and it's Cora, that's what. But by the way, that's
Speaker 1: what all. That's what. That's what these shows are like
Speaker 1: it's called it doesn't I just said it today. It
Speaker 1: doesn't matter if you actually have money. It just matters
Speaker 1: if you look like it. And these are scorecards. And
Speaker 1: and you've loved, longed for being a mother and been
Speaker 1: through medical challenges and I think you just have a
Speaker 1: different perspective. And that's not you realize that it's fool's gold.
Speaker 1: There's no they're there. You're never gonna get there. Yeah.
Speaker 3: No, it's like the its you can't scratch enjoy like
Speaker 3: life is going to be like that. And they always say, like,
Speaker 3: the happiest people are the people who make enough money
Speaker 3: to pay their bills and go on to vacations a year.
Speaker 3: If you make less, it's horrible and miserable, and if
Speaker 3: you make more, you're always preoccupied with some bs. I
Speaker 3: still remember we got some weird ac thing in our
Speaker 3: apartment and it was like on the phone, and so
Speaker 3: it wasn't working. So what happened for forty five minutes?
Speaker 3: Why isn't the thing working on the wall from my phone?
Speaker 2: Think? Why did I even have that?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 3: Stop getting things that are making you spend more time
Speaker 3: taking care of those things.
Speaker 1: Yes, it's like have less, it's owning you.
Speaker 2: Yes, that's what I feel like.
Speaker 3: It's sometimes some things are dinky, small like that, and
Speaker 3: some things are big.
Speaker 2: You know. It's like someone complaining they got to the car.
Speaker 2: Can you believe what happened in my car? It's like,
Speaker 2: don't tell me, right, I don't care about your flat tire?
Speaker 2: Right right?
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, I really really do get because I feel
Speaker 1: like I still do. You remember what it was like
Speaker 1: to be really broke, Like it's nervous. It's not that
Speaker 1: far away. It's not that it's not that far away.
Speaker 1: And I can't even believe. I remember when I couldn't
Speaker 1: take a taxi from uptown to downtown, Like I was
Speaker 1: the one that was walking, and it was like my
Speaker 1: great fitness because I'd be doing with the twenty blocks
Speaker 1: is a mile and at night it was didn't feel
Speaker 1: as safe to be taking the train, so I'd try
Speaker 1: to walk or go to dinner early. And sometimes you
Speaker 1: have to take a taxi and it was sixty second
Speaker 1: Street to get down to West Broadway. It was like
Speaker 1: twenty six dollars. And I tell you that was like
Speaker 1: there was no way you were just doing it on
Speaker 1: your credit card. I'd always get in sufficient funds and
Speaker 1: then it's like a domino effect. Then you get the
Speaker 1: other funds and then you bounce all the checks and
Speaker 1: begging on the phone and mad at that person for
Speaker 1: not giving you a refund. And I if you have
Speaker 1: that feeling inside I have, I will always have a
Speaker 1: little noise about it, Like I still can't believe that's
Speaker 1: the only thing I have imposter syndrome, But I can't
Speaker 1: believe I could pet I don't get I get to
Speaker 1: I want to do that, so I get to do that.
Speaker 1: What do you mean I want to eat that? So
Speaker 1: I get to like I get to go today to
Speaker 1: seven cookie places and like do a cookie crawl, and
Speaker 1: like I can afford to buy the chocolate cookies. I
Speaker 1: know it sounds crazy. It's not the big stuff, it's
Speaker 1: not the house. I can't believe I could buy like
Speaker 1: a bunch of chocolate and cookies for everybody today, Like
Speaker 1: it sounds ridiculous, but that's because it's not that long ago.
Speaker 1: And I like that I have that because it does
Speaker 1: make you realize the value and also makes you a
Speaker 1: good tipper because you know, because you know that that
Speaker 1: person that that money, Yeah, the ten dollars on the
Speaker 1: ten dollars cookie things today like ment everything, everything to that.
Speaker 3: I remember I used to work at Ponderosa and I
Speaker 3: still remember you. You'd work your tail off and they'd
Speaker 3: get and some people wouldn't tip at all, and you
Speaker 3: were like, I cannot believe this tip man. I mean,
Speaker 3: that's one of my big, big big pep peepig saying
Speaker 3: yeah that that that tells you everything about a person.
Speaker 1: I know it's not fair that it's like a lottery,
Speaker 1: that it's like a lottery, they get good or a
Speaker 1: bad tip for a kid.
Speaker 2: I'll tell you later.
Speaker 1: I have a whole different app for that because I
Speaker 1: thought there has to be a way.
Speaker 2: Who cares, No I do. It's another idea that you're
Speaker 2: gonna have.
Speaker 1: It's gonna yeah, we need any more ideas. It's it's
Speaker 1: one hundred percent positive. So do you worry about are
Speaker 1: you vain? I've never really thought, yeah, you're not vain.
Speaker 2: We're it's actually interestingly, you're the same. You don't care.
Speaker 1: I really know.
Speaker 3: Wow, clearly remember today when you showed up from your pajamas.
Speaker 3: But you know what, I love you roll up the
Speaker 3: thirty Rock in your slippers. There's like eight thousand boparazzi
Speaker 3: outside and you're just rolling hot, you know what? And
Speaker 3: it's it's everything you post.
Speaker 1: You don't care, because let's pretend I do. What's happening,
Speaker 1: what's gonna happen? What happens? I look the best them?
Speaker 1: Am I getting a prize? Am I getting another cookie?
Speaker 1: I want to understand if I look perfect, what's gonna
Speaker 1: fucking happen? I don't understand if I don't look perfect,
Speaker 1: there's no bar. This is the bottom. You can't expect, like,
Speaker 1: I don't understand what is gonna happen? But why are
Speaker 1: people upset? What you're talking about? The money? Why are
Speaker 1: people upset? Why is everybody a filter? Why? But what
Speaker 1: are we doing?
Speaker 2: We know?
Speaker 1: Well, we don't know. I don't know. But you look
Speaker 1: like a clown and you look perfect. I acknowledge it.
Speaker 1: What do we do now? What happens next? You're perfect?
Speaker 1: I don't get it. Just tell me you're smart. I
Speaker 1: want to know what happens if I walk in today,
Speaker 1: it look perfect? Do I get you? Guys gonna pay
Speaker 1: me to come next time? What's gonna happen?
Speaker 2: We'll never pay you people like me?
Speaker 1: I don't know, So I don't know.
Speaker 2: My God, that makes me laugh. It is so true.
Speaker 1: So that's the only thing. I'm a path at least
Speaker 1: resistance kind of gal.
Speaker 3: I think it's funny, but you always know, Like I
Speaker 3: there was I was somewhere out and my caller was
Speaker 3: flipped in, which is I can't even believe it was
Speaker 3: even you know, functioning, but there was on It.
Speaker 2: Was like your call your caller. I was like, what
Speaker 2: what what happened your caller? It's flipped backwards?
Speaker 3: I was, but but it does show you that I
Speaker 3: think there is something about how you present yourself that
Speaker 3: people think matters.
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 1: I but you really care that you care, you care,
Speaker 1: like and you do care. Yeah, if I make an effort,
Speaker 1: I'd like the painting to come out nice, because that
Speaker 1: often happens too for me. Like I'll do make an
Speaker 1: effort and then something's wrong, and I'm like, I came
Speaker 1: all this way. I have a I do have a
Speaker 1: struggle with all that because I was when I used
Speaker 1: to live on sixty Secondary and I wasn't known. I
Speaker 1: used to go to Starbucks in my cow pajamas because
Speaker 1: and like pimple medicine, I don't none of us people
Speaker 1: know who cares?
Speaker 2: I care?
Speaker 1: And yeah, because I didn't understand what's the difference. I'm
Speaker 1: a person, I have pajamas and I want coffee. These
Speaker 1: are things are happening at the same time. Why I
Speaker 1: get dressed up with the eyelashes on to go to
Speaker 1: Star Wars I don't understand. I've never understood.
Speaker 2: So that's so we're both not vain. That's good.
Speaker 1: So we're both not van and No, but where are
Speaker 1: you with age? Because age is a different thing that
Speaker 1: we think about with health and being there for your kids,
Speaker 1: and that's anxiety. You must have that anxiety.
Speaker 3: I do have it sometimes. But my dad died when
Speaker 3: he was fifty four, fifty four, fifty five. His birthday,
Speaker 3: in fact, was May twenty ninth. It just passed and
Speaker 3: so he passed away.
Speaker 2: Then.
Speaker 3: Now I always think that the foundation he laid down
Speaker 3: was good for me.
Speaker 2: It helped me in my life. And sometimes I do
Speaker 2: the math.
Speaker 3: I look at my mom, who's eighty six, and I
Speaker 3: think to myself, Okay, what's the difference here between me
Speaker 3: and heart thirty? It's almost okay, Okay, that's kind of good.
Speaker 3: So let's see thirty years. Okay, So I add thirty
Speaker 3: to Haley and I had thirty to Hope, and I
Speaker 3: think to myself, won't that be spectacular?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 2: I can do that. Wouldn't that be amazing? Like do
Speaker 2: I get to see them get married?
Speaker 3: Maybe that would be really good. Or do I get
Speaker 3: to see them have a child, maybe.
Speaker 2: But that would be really good.
Speaker 3: Yeah, Like I think about it, but I don't think
Speaker 3: about it on the end of Oh no, I won't
Speaker 3: be able to yes, no, yeah, no, no, I would
Speaker 3: be delighted. If all those things were possible, and I
Speaker 3: think that that could that would be special.
Speaker 2: And I think it happened in the shower.
Speaker 3: I literally wrote on the glass my mom's age minus
Speaker 3: my age, and I looked at the number and I.
Speaker 1: Was like, because that's because that's literal.
Speaker 3: If you get what if you get that that many years, Yeah,
Speaker 3: that's that's more than I got with my dad.
Speaker 1: I think about that too. I do think in the
Speaker 1: bath of Brinn and I'm like, don't want her to
Speaker 1: know how to add. I mean, she's in she I
Speaker 1: think she knows how she's thirteen. I think she can
Speaker 1: add those numbers, but I hope she doesn't scramble it up.
Speaker 2: Because she asks you about your age, and she.
Speaker 1: She makes the connection. I watched her make the connection
Speaker 1: and then I watch her get distracted because it's anxiety
Speaker 1: for her. We're very close. It really does get so
Speaker 1: much nicer. I mean, it's it just keeps getting better.
Speaker 1: It's so beautiful. They become. People will say you're not
Speaker 1: you're not their best friend. I am. She we're best friends,
Speaker 1: and I'm also a strict indulgent parent. But yeah, we
Speaker 1: definitely definitely are really really do talk to I will
Speaker 1: say one thing, I notice that in talking to you
Speaker 1: about being present, we could be talking and she could
Speaker 1: come home and we could talk. If we're really really
Speaker 1: quiet and go out to dinner or something and there's
Speaker 1: no there are no phones above, she'll really tell me everything.
Speaker 1: It's it's very different or laying TV. It's got to
Speaker 1: be very relaxed. It's never when you want them to
Speaker 1: talk or when you're sitting down to talk because you're
Speaker 1: trying to be a proactive parent, and it really just
Speaker 1: like comes in when nothing's going on. They'll just say
Speaker 1: this made me feel really bad when this happened, or
Speaker 1: I'm having in trouble with this person. And a lot
Speaker 1: of crazy stuff does happen at school and they don't
Speaker 1: even realize it's happening. They know it, but they're stifling
Speaker 1: because they're not in touch with their emotions. So I
Speaker 1: would say the only thing that I really really have
Speaker 1: learned is that you have to really be quiet, no
Speaker 1: devices and just like allow the wine to breathe, because
Speaker 1: everything comes out.
Speaker 2: What's your device?
Speaker 1: Rule?
Speaker 2: Like what do you have When it comes to.
Speaker 1: With her, she's not she's an artist. She's not that
Speaker 1: into it. Sometimes she'll just do it if we're in
Speaker 1: the car and they'll see her. If it's after a
Speaker 1: certain bed time where feels like you're eating cheetos just
Speaker 1: to eat them. You're bringing cheetos like you're not even
Speaker 1: enjoying them anymore, just like downing the back, I'll be like,
Speaker 1: it's no off off. Yeah, but she's not.
Speaker 2: That's not that kid.
Speaker 1: No, she's not at tables with it, or she never was,
Speaker 1: because when she was really little, I was not about
Speaker 1: the TV. I tried. I woke up like with the
Speaker 1: toothpicks and the eyeballs and was like, oh god, I
Speaker 1: gotta be that parent. But yeah, I think it's really
Speaker 1: I do think it's toxic. It's toxic to us.
Speaker 2: I know it's terrible. It's gross.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we were talking about a lot of people are
Speaker 3: doing that wait till eighth or wait till ninth grade,
Speaker 3: or wait till high school to get a phone, and
Speaker 3: some people are doing the why don't we just all
Speaker 3: give the kids flip phones just so they have a
Speaker 3: way to communicate.
Speaker 2: But they are not hard.
Speaker 1: I'm not. I can't say that I'm good or I
Speaker 1: winning any awards at that. But she's not that into
Speaker 1: it I have. It's my own relationship.
Speaker 2: With it that's toxic.
Speaker 1: It.
Speaker 2: It's like gross.
Speaker 1: I think it's gross, and I'm gross and I want
Speaker 1: to beat myself up but I'm gross, but it just
Speaker 1: makes me. It's gross the whole thing. It changed. It's gross,
Speaker 1: all right. So the last well not the last question.
Speaker 1: I could stay with you forever, but you have to
Speaker 1: live a life is so what do you think about
Speaker 1: your work dynamic? Like do you think do you think
Speaker 1: about your age and people that are coming up underneath you?
Speaker 1: Are you do you still have that competitive thought or like,
Speaker 1: oh are they more interesting? Or do you think about that?
Speaker 3: I weirdly, in my career, I don't. That's not been
Speaker 3: my thing. Like I was always the one who like
Speaker 3: the little engine that could, Like I was going to
Speaker 3: outwork you. I might not be as bright, or as pretty,
Speaker 3: or as smart or all those things, but I'll.
Speaker 2: Still be here. I'll be the one.
Speaker 3: Because when I played high school basketball, I would until
Speaker 3: the buzzer sounded.
Speaker 2: I believed we could win.
Speaker 3: I used to I used to cry after games because
Speaker 3: I would give every single ounce. And I'm a believer,
Speaker 3: like miracles happen.
Speaker 2: I've watched it.
Speaker 3: I mean, I mean, you know, I hit the foul
Speaker 3: shot when no one thought I would would do it.
Speaker 3: So I believe that I can. I can make it
Speaker 3: and I can make something happen. But the weird thing
Speaker 3: about our industry are industry is it's like, look at
Speaker 3: the women driving the buses.
Speaker 2: Man.
Speaker 1: Young women need someone to inspire them. I think more
Speaker 1: than ever now, there's so much going on and you can.
Speaker 1: You know, it's funny that you say that because I've
Speaker 1: found this crazy thing that we keep joking about. The
Speaker 1: TikTok think it's for baby. They're children, but they need
Speaker 1: a wacky, crazy ant. You know what I'm saying, Like
Speaker 1: you can find your place in this whole thing you're
Speaker 1: covering Afghanistan. I'm wacky, crazy ant going in pajamas, but
Speaker 1: we all have our place in society. No, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. Though, If you like that, it makes
Speaker 1: you feel free and you just don't care anymore.
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 3: And I also feel like there's a freedom that has
Speaker 3: come to me, not just professionally but personally. And I
Speaker 3: think finding your purpose and being able to say out
Speaker 3: loud things that you were scared to say out loud
Speaker 3: when you were younger and to realize, like you get
Speaker 3: one go at it, man, it's gonna be when you
Speaker 3: said you're in the box, like you get one ride
Speaker 3: around the sun?
Speaker 2: Like do you? I agree? And I feel like.
Speaker 3: It's time to be purposeful also, and you know, in
Speaker 3: the charity part of life and in the party, I
Speaker 3: get a bit which I'm going to come back and
Speaker 3: share it with you.
Speaker 1: I know we're not going to talk about it now.
Speaker 1: But the last thing is will you do you care?
Speaker 1: How do I say this properly? Do you? Is it
Speaker 1: important to you to be in a relationship with a
Speaker 1: man now?
Speaker 2: Like is it?
Speaker 1: Is it just if it happens it's additive or do
Speaker 1: you proactively put it out there because you want it
Speaker 1: in the universe or not right now?
Speaker 3: Sometimes I have a vision which is and I picture
Speaker 3: this road that I'm on and it's lush and beautiful
Speaker 3: and it's filled with like streams and mountains and pretty everything.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 3: It's like you know, like sometimes you're on a craggy
Speaker 3: road with potholes and it's kind of dusty, and you're like,
Speaker 3: I don't want to go down this way. I want
Speaker 3: to go back and when you're on the right road,
Speaker 3: you feel it. You're like, oh, this is good. I
Speaker 3: picture my kids and sometimes I have a vision of
Speaker 3: a man walking with us, like and I kind of
Speaker 3: like the other day I saw it and was clear,
Speaker 3: and this was the road that I imagine my life,
Speaker 3: Like you know, when you're living your life right, this
Speaker 3: is your road.
Speaker 2: Like I'm on it right now.
Speaker 3: I know I'm on the road, and sometimes I can
Speaker 3: see it and sometimes I can't. But I'm you know, well,
Speaker 3: like have I gone on on a couple of days, sure,
Speaker 3: but you're I'm open, of course, because look, your heart's
Speaker 3: ability to expand is beyond measure and why limit it
Speaker 3: because that one was this one or that didn't work.
Speaker 3: It doesn't like your I just feel like there's so
Speaker 3: much in there. It is, it's immeasurable. You could have
Speaker 3: another kid, you could have another puppy, you could have
Speaker 3: another I like, there's room for more.
Speaker 1: So I do keep it open, and you're allowing for
Speaker 1: either like either as either as interesting. I love it.
Speaker 2: I love you, I love you, Love you. Bethany