1 00:00:12,039 --> 00:00:15,120 Speaker 1: I love Hotacopy so much. I've known her forever. She 2 00:00:15,240 --> 00:00:18,560 Speaker 1: is a broadcast journalist, a television personality, and an author. 3 00:00:18,880 --> 00:00:22,160 Speaker 1: Hoda joined NBC in nineteen ninety eight as a correspondent, 4 00:00:22,200 --> 00:00:24,159 Speaker 1: which has now led her in her role as a 5 00:00:24,239 --> 00:00:27,400 Speaker 1: main co anchor of NBC's Today Show and co host 6 00:00:27,440 --> 00:00:30,600 Speaker 1: of its entertainment focused Fourth Hour. Ho To takes pride 7 00:00:30,600 --> 00:00:33,760 Speaker 1: in being a mother to her two beautiful daughters. We're 8 00:00:33,800 --> 00:00:37,120 Speaker 1: live from thirty Rock. This is just be with Hotacopy. 9 00:00:37,400 --> 00:00:40,440 Speaker 1: Let's get into it. So I'm very excited live for Hoda. Yeah, 10 00:00:40,520 --> 00:00:41,279 Speaker 1: let's get into it. 11 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:48,320 Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, Hoda. 12 00:00:47,760 --> 00:00:50,400 Speaker 1: You're not doing the interviewing today, are you sure? 13 00:00:50,560 --> 00:00:50,760 Speaker 2: Yes? 14 00:00:52,159 --> 00:00:54,360 Speaker 3: I want you to say something. Watch me because I'm 15 00:00:54,440 --> 00:00:55,800 Speaker 3: good at switching it around. 16 00:00:55,560 --> 00:00:59,400 Speaker 1: And you decent. You have some experience. Okay, So when 17 00:00:59,440 --> 00:01:01,320 Speaker 1: did we first? Mean? How long ago do we meet? 18 00:01:01,360 --> 00:01:03,400 Speaker 1: I think I did a segment with you. I think 19 00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:04,320 Speaker 1: that's the first time. 20 00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:07,800 Speaker 3: I think the very first time you were on the 21 00:01:07,840 --> 00:01:10,200 Speaker 3: Today Show was that when. 22 00:01:10,120 --> 00:01:12,319 Speaker 2: You and Martha Stewart refuding? Or was it before that? 23 00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:16,640 Speaker 1: Wow? That's a good Why was I on when we 24 00:01:16,640 --> 00:01:17,160 Speaker 1: were fused? 25 00:01:17,240 --> 00:01:20,880 Speaker 3: I just remember that you were the thing you became 26 00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:23,280 Speaker 3: the thing. In the very beginning, I knew you were scared, 27 00:01:23,319 --> 00:01:26,080 Speaker 3: which I when I think of you now, I think 28 00:01:26,080 --> 00:01:29,120 Speaker 3: of you as this ball of confidence, just like ruling 29 00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:32,560 Speaker 3: the world. But I do remember when you were just 30 00:01:33,040 --> 00:01:36,959 Speaker 3: coming into the Today Show, and I cannot remember the date, 31 00:01:37,080 --> 00:01:40,000 Speaker 3: but I do remember the feeling. It was like you 32 00:01:40,080 --> 00:01:41,880 Speaker 3: wanted everything to be just right. 33 00:01:42,319 --> 00:01:45,400 Speaker 1: I did have index cards and I came in and 34 00:01:45,520 --> 00:01:48,160 Speaker 1: we were doing a food segment about like your food personality. 35 00:01:48,240 --> 00:01:50,400 Speaker 1: We went down that same swervy line we went down 36 00:01:50,440 --> 00:01:53,880 Speaker 1: today weird like ye did snake tables, so like, and 37 00:01:53,960 --> 00:01:56,400 Speaker 1: let's move next to the next station. But I'm trying 38 00:01:56,400 --> 00:01:58,440 Speaker 1: to think about where you were in your life now, 39 00:01:58,480 --> 00:02:00,840 Speaker 1: because back then I thought of you in a similar 40 00:02:00,840 --> 00:02:02,960 Speaker 1: way that I do now, Like your hoe A copy. 41 00:02:02,680 --> 00:02:05,600 Speaker 1: You know, you're a big deal, and you've evolved so 42 00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:07,960 Speaker 1: much in your career. So where that was, Let's say 43 00:02:07,960 --> 00:02:09,600 Speaker 1: that was like fifteen years ago, I want to say, 44 00:02:09,639 --> 00:02:11,440 Speaker 1: because I didn't have we didn't have children, I didn't 45 00:02:11,440 --> 00:02:13,639 Speaker 1: have Britain. You came out to the Hamptons. I have 46 00:02:13,840 --> 00:02:14,520 Speaker 1: pictures of. 47 00:02:14,480 --> 00:02:17,600 Speaker 3: Us, yes, pattle baby beach, yes. 48 00:02:17,280 --> 00:02:19,080 Speaker 1: And we went on my beach and we had all 49 00:02:19,120 --> 00:02:22,160 Speaker 1: these conversations and we listened to Bruno Mars. It was 50 00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:24,240 Speaker 1: when one of his first albums came out, and we 51 00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:26,280 Speaker 1: were just like free in a different way. 52 00:02:26,639 --> 00:02:31,160 Speaker 3: Imber I the feeling of no kids, no worries, no nothing, 53 00:02:31,160 --> 00:02:31,960 Speaker 3: you don't even know. 54 00:02:31,919 --> 00:02:32,560 Speaker 2: That you're free. 55 00:02:32,680 --> 00:02:35,480 Speaker 3: But I think I was always so fascinated by you, 56 00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:38,600 Speaker 3: and I think it was because I had never met 57 00:02:38,639 --> 00:02:43,480 Speaker 3: anyone who was fearless. I don't think i'd ever spoken 58 00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:46,919 Speaker 3: to anyone who, to me, felt fearless. And you always 59 00:02:46,960 --> 00:02:49,079 Speaker 3: had this thing. And I remember thinking to myself, I 60 00:02:49,080 --> 00:02:51,360 Speaker 3: don't know if that's confidence. I don't know what it is, 61 00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:56,360 Speaker 3: but you were yourself. And I think as women and 62 00:02:56,520 --> 00:03:02,720 Speaker 3: me personally, it takes so long to find your voice, 63 00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:06,480 Speaker 3: to say what you want to say, to come out 64 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:07,080 Speaker 3: with it. 65 00:03:07,400 --> 00:03:07,600 Speaker 2: You know. 66 00:03:07,760 --> 00:03:10,480 Speaker 1: But why why do you think I'm trying to think about? 67 00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:14,240 Speaker 1: I think I watch people turn themselves inside out to 68 00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:16,560 Speaker 1: be something that they're not, and it seems so much 69 00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:19,600 Speaker 1: more exhausting. So why, Like I was watching the Mary 70 00:03:19,639 --> 00:03:22,040 Speaker 1: Tyler Moore you saw the documentary, I'm sure, and I 71 00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:25,120 Speaker 1: probably thought so much about a man career, life and feminism. 72 00:03:25,480 --> 00:03:30,560 Speaker 1: So why do you think women aren't just able to 73 00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:32,560 Speaker 1: be themselves. You think they don't know who they are yet, 74 00:03:32,639 --> 00:03:34,240 Speaker 1: or they're trying to be what everyone else wants them 75 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:36,560 Speaker 1: to be because of the construct. 76 00:03:36,040 --> 00:03:41,360 Speaker 3: I think it is like innately I was and no longer, 77 00:03:41,360 --> 00:03:44,200 Speaker 3: but I was a pleaser, like I wanted to be liked, 78 00:03:44,680 --> 00:03:48,280 Speaker 3: and I thought that made life so much easier. And 79 00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:52,440 Speaker 3: to say something brave, to say I don't like that, 80 00:03:52,680 --> 00:03:56,400 Speaker 3: or to speak up takes a lot of courage. And 81 00:03:56,600 --> 00:03:59,880 Speaker 3: I sat quietly through most of my career and may 82 00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:03,920 Speaker 3: aid much less than my co anchor much less, probably 83 00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:04,800 Speaker 3: half if that. 84 00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:07,520 Speaker 2: And you knew that, And there are times when I. 85 00:04:07,520 --> 00:04:10,400 Speaker 1: Knew it, And what did you feel every day about it? 86 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:12,000 Speaker 1: What did you or did you think that's just the 87 00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:12,520 Speaker 1: way it was? 88 00:04:12,560 --> 00:04:14,440 Speaker 3: That I kind of thought it was the way it was, 89 00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:16,839 Speaker 3: but I was all. I also tried really hard not 90 00:04:16,920 --> 00:04:18,920 Speaker 3: to think about it, because I think you would start 91 00:04:18,960 --> 00:04:22,479 Speaker 3: resenting You're like, but wait, I work longer hours, I 92 00:04:22,640 --> 00:04:28,240 Speaker 3: do more, And I think it took me until I'm 93 00:04:28,279 --> 00:04:33,440 Speaker 3: not kidding, probably like ten years ago, ten years ago, 94 00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:39,760 Speaker 3: to finally say uncle, like that's enough, I'm going to 95 00:04:39,760 --> 00:04:42,040 Speaker 3: get I'm going to get what I deserve to get paid, 96 00:04:42,360 --> 00:04:43,960 Speaker 3: but I think I always felt lucky to be in 97 00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:44,279 Speaker 3: the room. 98 00:04:44,320 --> 00:04:46,400 Speaker 1: Like, oh, by the way, I was going to say 99 00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:49,479 Speaker 1: that hat Listen, I got my first season with seven 100 00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:51,800 Speaker 1: tho twohundred fifty dollars on the house was but you. 101 00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:53,960 Speaker 2: Wait, wait, seven thousand was your first. 102 00:04:54,640 --> 00:04:57,640 Speaker 1: Hundred fifty dollars for the first season. But I didn't 103 00:04:57,640 --> 00:04:59,840 Speaker 1: care because I want I was good. Let me have 104 00:04:59,880 --> 00:05:02,919 Speaker 1: the back end. Like in my mind, I'm saying, don't 105 00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:04,760 Speaker 1: you think that maybe you felt really lucky to be 106 00:05:04,760 --> 00:05:06,520 Speaker 1: in the room, and then you later thought you had leverage, 107 00:05:06,560 --> 00:05:08,960 Speaker 1: like you start to think like I'm smart, I know 108 00:05:09,160 --> 00:05:11,919 Speaker 1: when I can when my call, when I have a 109 00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:12,719 Speaker 1: good hand. 110 00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:15,119 Speaker 3: It took me a long time to realize that because 111 00:05:15,160 --> 00:05:18,000 Speaker 3: when you work with iconic people, you always feel less 112 00:05:18,040 --> 00:05:22,160 Speaker 3: than I think, like I worked with Kathy Lee, and 113 00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:22,840 Speaker 3: that's like. 114 00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:23,880 Speaker 2: Sitting next to a legend. 115 00:05:24,120 --> 00:05:27,520 Speaker 3: Sorry, you can't even believe that you got the seat. 116 00:05:27,720 --> 00:05:29,320 Speaker 1: The dynamic was set up in the beginning. It's the 117 00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:31,480 Speaker 1: way it is with a parent, like sometimes a parent 118 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:34,440 Speaker 1: or a teacher or somebody who it's me and Martha Stewart. Frankly, yeah, 119 00:05:34,480 --> 00:05:37,120 Speaker 1: if I would have to fight the urge to to 120 00:05:37,200 --> 00:05:39,839 Speaker 1: not to feel like to cower, but then to overcome 121 00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:42,920 Speaker 1: it by somehow being stronger. And it's this whole dynamic 122 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:45,239 Speaker 1: and dynamics are set up in our child. 123 00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:47,800 Speaker 3: Well, yeah, and I think with cath and I remember 124 00:05:47,839 --> 00:05:52,599 Speaker 3: this really well. I was hosting with Natalie Morales and 125 00:05:52,560 --> 00:05:55,159 Speaker 3: Ann Curry. It was the three of us. That's how 126 00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:58,920 Speaker 3: that hour started. And we were hosting together. And one 127 00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:01,800 Speaker 3: day they were both out sick, and Amy Rosenblum and 128 00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:04,080 Speaker 3: I were in a restaurant. We were at Michael's and 129 00:06:04,080 --> 00:06:05,480 Speaker 3: we walked by and we're like, is that Kathy Lake 130 00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:07,960 Speaker 3: get heard at the table over there? Oh my god, 131 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:09,960 Speaker 3: it's Kathy Lee. Amy was like, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, 132 00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:10,960 Speaker 3: I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go over it. 133 00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:11,480 Speaker 2: Let's go over. 134 00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:12,960 Speaker 3: We love you and we love you. 135 00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:14,320 Speaker 2: And she was like, oh thank you. 136 00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:15,799 Speaker 3: And Amy goes, can you co host? 137 00:06:15,839 --> 00:06:18,839 Speaker 2: Are you free one day? And she said, I'm very busy. 138 00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:19,760 Speaker 2: I don't know if I can. 139 00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:23,080 Speaker 3: Amy just said one day, and I just I met her. 140 00:06:23,120 --> 00:06:25,159 Speaker 3: I just watched her with reg like we did. We're like, 141 00:06:25,400 --> 00:06:28,960 Speaker 3: oh no. So the next a week later, she came 142 00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:29,520 Speaker 3: on the show. 143 00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:32,800 Speaker 2: Her boobs were out, her cleavage was out, she. 144 00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:34,919 Speaker 3: Was running around, she had that big hair, and she 145 00:06:35,040 --> 00:06:37,120 Speaker 3: was just delighting everybody. 146 00:06:37,160 --> 00:06:38,600 Speaker 2: And I was mesmerized. 147 00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:42,039 Speaker 3: I was like, who is this force of freaking nature? 148 00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:42,440 Speaker 1: Really? 149 00:06:42,440 --> 00:06:45,240 Speaker 3: The energy she blew the place up so much so 150 00:06:45,279 --> 00:06:48,000 Speaker 3: that the that the big guns from thirty Rock came 151 00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:50,800 Speaker 3: over all the execs, well, Kathy Loo you know and 152 00:06:50,839 --> 00:06:53,680 Speaker 3: all that, and a little while later they were like, 153 00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:54,799 Speaker 3: we want her to host. 154 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:55,520 Speaker 1: Oh my god. 155 00:06:55,720 --> 00:06:58,479 Speaker 3: And so they originally they said, okay, you'll host, Kathy 156 00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:00,240 Speaker 3: Lil host, and then we'll bring in some buddy. 157 00:07:00,400 --> 00:07:01,479 Speaker 2: We'll see who to host with. 158 00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:06,080 Speaker 3: And she said, Kathie Lee said, after our one hosting day, 159 00:07:06,200 --> 00:07:09,000 Speaker 3: she said, if it's not Hoda, I'm not going to 160 00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:09,320 Speaker 3: do it. 161 00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:12,520 Speaker 1: Oh well, that's the beginning of some leverage there. 162 00:07:12,760 --> 00:07:15,040 Speaker 2: So she also chose me. 163 00:07:15,880 --> 00:07:19,400 Speaker 3: So when someone chooses you too, like she chose me, 164 00:07:19,440 --> 00:07:22,040 Speaker 3: and I am like forever grateful. I still remember going 165 00:07:22,120 --> 00:07:24,880 Speaker 3: out to her house and I was talking to Frank, 166 00:07:25,240 --> 00:07:27,360 Speaker 3: her husband, Frank Gifford at the time, and I mean, 167 00:07:28,040 --> 00:07:30,400 Speaker 3: and he said, I'm going to tell you how this 168 00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:32,560 Speaker 3: is going to work, if this is going to work 169 00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:34,080 Speaker 3: for you and my wife, And I. 170 00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:35,760 Speaker 2: Said, okay, because I'm all yours. 171 00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:40,360 Speaker 3: And he said, you have to trust someone to catch 172 00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:44,080 Speaker 3: you when you fall. And she's the most trustworthy person 173 00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:44,600 Speaker 3: I've ever. 174 00:07:44,480 --> 00:07:45,200 Speaker 2: Known in my life. 175 00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:46,800 Speaker 1: Wow, that's so deep. 176 00:07:47,280 --> 00:07:49,400 Speaker 3: And if you are like that at all, it will 177 00:07:49,440 --> 00:07:54,880 Speaker 3: work because she'll catch you. And you know what she did. Wow, 178 00:07:54,920 --> 00:07:58,760 Speaker 3: over and over again. And I think when you work 179 00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:00,880 Speaker 3: with someone like that and all of a sudden you 180 00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:03,600 Speaker 3: feel safe. I think about when you feel safe. 181 00:08:03,680 --> 00:08:05,760 Speaker 1: I know that's so yea, that is so mad is 182 00:08:05,800 --> 00:08:09,400 Speaker 1: so I didn't know that it's so powerful. Wow, wow, 183 00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:12,200 Speaker 1: And I see, I just see this. So I remember 184 00:08:12,280 --> 00:08:14,960 Speaker 1: when we were sitting in the Hantons and you had 185 00:08:15,080 --> 00:08:19,120 Speaker 1: been married prior, and you had been through health issues 186 00:08:19,240 --> 00:08:22,560 Speaker 1: and like I don't want to say you were you 187 00:08:22,600 --> 00:08:25,640 Speaker 1: were pleasing. You were very pleasing. And I can now 188 00:08:25,720 --> 00:08:28,640 Speaker 1: that I were deconstructing this, see that, Like I remember 189 00:08:28,720 --> 00:08:31,160 Speaker 1: you always it seemed you told me that Ann Curry 190 00:08:31,200 --> 00:08:33,800 Speaker 1: told you one person at a time. I always remember 191 00:08:33,840 --> 00:08:36,079 Speaker 1: that like that, that you shake one hand at a time, 192 00:08:36,120 --> 00:08:37,600 Speaker 1: you connect with one person at a time, and have 193 00:08:37,679 --> 00:08:39,800 Speaker 1: always seen you. Yeah, Like I wish I had more 194 00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:41,800 Speaker 1: of that because I'm moving so quickly and you always 195 00:08:41,880 --> 00:08:44,440 Speaker 1: stop and connect and it's really and I do believe 196 00:08:44,480 --> 00:08:46,679 Speaker 1: you can build a whole career and life off of that. 197 00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:50,720 Speaker 1: And but maybe back then you were giving more than 198 00:08:50,760 --> 00:08:53,440 Speaker 1: you were even giving yourself. I do really remember that, 199 00:08:53,679 --> 00:08:54,839 Speaker 1: the energy about it. 200 00:08:55,200 --> 00:08:55,920 Speaker 2: I remembered. 201 00:08:56,000 --> 00:08:59,080 Speaker 3: I mean, I was when we knew each other. I 202 00:08:59,160 --> 00:09:01,760 Speaker 3: was back then, I was sick with breast cancer and 203 00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:04,720 Speaker 3: I was going through or had just been through a divorce. 204 00:09:06,440 --> 00:09:10,280 Speaker 3: And I remembered thinking because he wasn't there when I 205 00:09:10,440 --> 00:09:13,080 Speaker 3: was sick, and that was very it was just like 206 00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:17,480 Speaker 3: piercing to me. But I remembered in that moment thinking 207 00:09:17,480 --> 00:09:22,080 Speaker 3: to myself, like I might had I not gotten sick, 208 00:09:22,120 --> 00:09:23,199 Speaker 3: I might have stayed. 209 00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:24,640 Speaker 2: With him, and that would not have been the right 210 00:09:24,679 --> 00:09:25,319 Speaker 2: decision to. 211 00:09:25,320 --> 00:09:29,040 Speaker 3: Make, because I think I saw myself as an optimist, 212 00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:32,520 Speaker 3: and I thought that was a good thing. Optimists make 213 00:09:32,559 --> 00:09:36,520 Speaker 3: things work, Optimists get things done. Optimists will put a 214 00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:37,320 Speaker 3: circle in a square. 215 00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:39,600 Speaker 1: We'll solve the problem. But you're not. It's not about 216 00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:41,200 Speaker 1: how you feel you're going to fix this. 217 00:09:41,960 --> 00:09:43,760 Speaker 2: I can do it. I can do it nowhere. I'm 218 00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:44,280 Speaker 2: not a quitter. 219 00:09:44,320 --> 00:09:48,560 Speaker 3: I'm not a quar It's like, dude, some things don't work, 220 00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:51,839 Speaker 3: and that doesn't make you not optimistic. It just makes 221 00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:53,840 Speaker 3: you realize something isn't right. 222 00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:56,719 Speaker 1: Well, be happy works, Yeah, you know what I mean. 223 00:09:56,760 --> 00:10:00,719 Speaker 1: Being happy works. And I think I see you you 224 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:03,280 Speaker 1: really really have embraced parenthood, like you understand the gift 225 00:10:03,320 --> 00:10:05,040 Speaker 1: that it is. Like that's when you really realize what 226 00:10:05,120 --> 00:10:07,840 Speaker 1: love really is. I'm gonna cry. And then I think 227 00:10:07,880 --> 00:10:11,240 Speaker 1: that you, like me, I wanted to sort of be 228 00:10:11,280 --> 00:10:13,199 Speaker 1: saved by some man. You're gonna be some like great 229 00:10:13,240 --> 00:10:15,560 Speaker 1: guy who had everything going for you for them, and 230 00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:18,920 Speaker 1: I was kind of going to complete you like Renee Zelweger. 231 00:10:19,200 --> 00:10:22,480 Speaker 1: And I feel like motherhood really did that for you, 232 00:10:22,520 --> 00:10:25,160 Speaker 1: Like you don't feel the same quote unquote need to 233 00:10:25,200 --> 00:10:26,920 Speaker 1: meet someone. Back then, it might have been a need. 234 00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:27,800 Speaker 1: Now it's a one. 235 00:10:27,920 --> 00:10:31,559 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's that's exactly it. That's exactly it. 236 00:10:32,200 --> 00:10:37,960 Speaker 3: I think, I think motherhood and you know with Brinn, 237 00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:40,079 Speaker 3: just what it feels like every day. I mean, my 238 00:10:40,200 --> 00:10:40,960 Speaker 3: God beyond. 239 00:10:41,160 --> 00:10:44,080 Speaker 2: But I think when you. 240 00:10:44,040 --> 00:10:47,480 Speaker 3: Realize that that wasn't meant for you, or you think 241 00:10:47,520 --> 00:10:50,920 Speaker 3: that at least initially, it's a terrifying part of life 242 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:54,400 Speaker 3: because you have to face it. And I remembered never 243 00:10:54,480 --> 00:10:57,960 Speaker 3: saying out loud that I wanted kids, never because it 244 00:10:58,000 --> 00:11:01,440 Speaker 3: was too late. So for girls who it's too late for, 245 00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:03,880 Speaker 3: you don't say it because if you say it, you're 246 00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:05,800 Speaker 3: expressing something that you're never going to get. It's like 247 00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:08,120 Speaker 3: saying I'm gonna be an astronaut. It's like you're never 248 00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:11,040 Speaker 3: It's never gonna happen. And I still remember this day 249 00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:13,120 Speaker 3: like it was yesterday. I was walking through the Hamptons 250 00:11:13,160 --> 00:11:16,719 Speaker 3: with my friend Jen and she just casually said, well, 251 00:11:16,720 --> 00:11:19,560 Speaker 3: we never wanted kids, and I stopped and I looked 252 00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:22,840 Speaker 3: at her and I go, I actually did. And she goes, 253 00:11:23,480 --> 00:11:26,120 Speaker 3: you never said that, and I said, because it can't 254 00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:29,760 Speaker 3: be so I'm not. I'm just I've just said it. 255 00:11:30,200 --> 00:11:32,240 Speaker 3: And I couldn't believe I said it out loud. And 256 00:11:32,280 --> 00:11:34,600 Speaker 3: all of a sudden, when you say something out loud. 257 00:11:34,960 --> 00:11:36,680 Speaker 1: You put it into the universe. Yes, you put it 258 00:11:36,720 --> 00:11:37,120 Speaker 1: out there. 259 00:11:37,480 --> 00:11:41,280 Speaker 3: And then everywhere I looked I saw a sign that 260 00:11:41,360 --> 00:11:44,480 Speaker 3: it was possible. I saw an interview that Sandra Bullock did. 261 00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:47,360 Speaker 3: She was like, oh, when I was, you know, fifty, 262 00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:49,560 Speaker 3: I decided I was going to I was like, you 263 00:11:49,559 --> 00:11:50,080 Speaker 3: can do that. 264 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,880 Speaker 2: Look at that. And then I saw this scene. 265 00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:55,040 Speaker 3: This was a horrible scene. It was from like Syria 266 00:11:55,200 --> 00:11:57,720 Speaker 3: or some war torn area, and there was a little 267 00:11:57,720 --> 00:11:59,880 Speaker 3: boy and I still remember him. He was like dusk 268 00:12:00,600 --> 00:12:02,320 Speaker 3: and it was all by himself, and I was like, 269 00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:06,480 Speaker 3: maybe there's a kid who needs me. Like I thought 270 00:12:06,520 --> 00:12:08,640 Speaker 3: that too, and I was like I saw that kid, 271 00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:11,440 Speaker 3: and I was like that child, you know, I don't 272 00:12:11,480 --> 00:12:15,800 Speaker 3: know it, you know, if it's possible. And then all 273 00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:18,360 Speaker 3: of a sudden, I just kept everything. It's like when 274 00:12:18,400 --> 00:12:19,560 Speaker 3: you want to buy a red car and all you 275 00:12:19,559 --> 00:12:21,720 Speaker 3: see red cars, and it's like that's all I could see, 276 00:12:21,880 --> 00:12:22,199 Speaker 3: and so. 277 00:12:22,440 --> 00:12:24,040 Speaker 1: Well, then you kick in. Then you're good at that. 278 00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:26,640 Speaker 1: Now you can yes, once you had a problem to solve, 279 00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:29,480 Speaker 1: that's not the problem. Just accepting, accepting it, do it. 280 00:12:29,520 --> 00:12:31,640 Speaker 3: And I still remember the moment because I filled out 281 00:12:31,640 --> 00:12:33,240 Speaker 3: all the paperwork and did all the stuff that you do, 282 00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:35,520 Speaker 3: and then they're like, okay, maybe a year, maybe six months, 283 00:12:35,559 --> 00:12:38,040 Speaker 3: maybe five years, good luck, bye bye. And I was 284 00:12:38,080 --> 00:12:41,839 Speaker 3: sitting in my office where we just were, and I remember, 285 00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:43,920 Speaker 3: like it was yesterday. I was sitting there and I 286 00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:47,840 Speaker 3: was doing some phone call with some nutritionness about something, 287 00:12:48,040 --> 00:12:50,480 Speaker 3: and I just remember it was just you know, babbling 288 00:12:50,480 --> 00:12:53,840 Speaker 3: on and on, and my phone beeped and I looked 289 00:12:53,920 --> 00:12:56,520 Speaker 3: at it and it was a text and it was 290 00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:59,240 Speaker 3: it said Ashley, and Ashley was the lady from my 291 00:12:59,240 --> 00:13:01,920 Speaker 3: adoption agents, and she said if I ever text you, 292 00:13:01,920 --> 00:13:05,680 Speaker 3: you need to call me back immediately. I saw her name. 293 00:13:06,360 --> 00:13:09,680 Speaker 3: I hung up the phone. I took a yellow pad out. 294 00:13:10,440 --> 00:13:13,920 Speaker 3: I looked at the clock and I wrote eleven fifty five. 295 00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:19,160 Speaker 3: Oh my god, I said, this is the moment everything changes. 296 00:13:19,360 --> 00:13:22,640 Speaker 3: I knew it, and so I took a deep breath. 297 00:13:23,440 --> 00:13:27,720 Speaker 2: The number I go, I said, Ashley, and she goes. 298 00:13:27,840 --> 00:13:31,680 Speaker 2: She said two words to me, she said, she's here. 299 00:13:33,040 --> 00:13:34,120 Speaker 2: I know. 300 00:13:34,160 --> 00:13:36,920 Speaker 3: I was weeping, and I thought to myself, in that moment, 301 00:13:36,960 --> 00:13:37,480 Speaker 3: she's here. 302 00:13:37,800 --> 00:13:39,520 Speaker 2: I don't know what birth feels like, and I bet 303 00:13:39,559 --> 00:13:43,320 Speaker 2: it was amazing. But this was really close. And I 304 00:13:43,360 --> 00:13:46,400 Speaker 2: remember the feeling like like it was yesterday. 305 00:13:49,320 --> 00:13:52,040 Speaker 1: I love you, Oh my god, I really feel you, 306 00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:56,760 Speaker 1: like my bones. Because it was also a release for you. Yeah, 307 00:13:56,800 --> 00:13:59,559 Speaker 1: like it was a loud Yeah. 308 00:13:59,080 --> 00:13:59,880 Speaker 2: It was amazing. 309 00:14:00,720 --> 00:14:05,560 Speaker 3: Anyway, so it came, it happened anyway, but that but 310 00:14:06,040 --> 00:14:09,840 Speaker 3: like to understand that, like, so it's sort of like 311 00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:12,880 Speaker 3: it reminded me that if you ever have a dream 312 00:14:13,080 --> 00:14:15,320 Speaker 3: or whatever it is, maybe it's not for a kid. 313 00:14:15,400 --> 00:14:19,440 Speaker 3: Maybe it's for something else, but it's like whisper it 314 00:14:20,040 --> 00:14:23,440 Speaker 3: even in the mirror by yourself. It doesn't matter where 315 00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:27,520 Speaker 3: you do it, to a friend, you know, somebody or nobody, 316 00:14:27,760 --> 00:14:30,080 Speaker 3: or to yourself. But once it's out, it's out. And 317 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:33,760 Speaker 3: I can't even believe I'm sitting here now with a 318 00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:35,160 Speaker 3: six year old and a. 319 00:14:35,160 --> 00:14:39,040 Speaker 2: Four year old. I have two children. Who are my kids? 320 00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:41,720 Speaker 3: I mean, I always said I wanted to be a teacher, 321 00:14:41,760 --> 00:14:43,280 Speaker 3: but I think I really wanted to be a teacher 322 00:14:43,280 --> 00:14:45,480 Speaker 3: because I wanted kids. Like I always said that when 323 00:14:45,520 --> 00:14:47,040 Speaker 3: I'm done in NBC, I'm gonna be a teacher. And 324 00:14:47,040 --> 00:14:48,840 Speaker 3: then one day I was like, I think being a 325 00:14:48,880 --> 00:14:51,520 Speaker 3: teacher is amazing, but I think the need it was 326 00:14:51,560 --> 00:14:55,120 Speaker 3: in need to do that because I couldn't get close enough. 327 00:14:55,200 --> 00:15:03,280 Speaker 3: You know, Hey, guys, it's Hota Kopy from the Today Show. 328 00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:07,280 Speaker 3: My podcast Making Space is full of conversations with spiritual 329 00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:11,440 Speaker 3: leaders and teachers, people like Bayol La Davis, Why Nona Judd, 330 00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:14,760 Speaker 3: Oprah Winfrey, Mel Robbins, and so many more. 331 00:15:15,280 --> 00:15:17,840 Speaker 2: Hear how they found the strength to make changes. 332 00:15:17,520 --> 00:15:20,080 Speaker 3: In their lives and how you could do it too. 333 00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:23,720 Speaker 3: All of them inspire me today. Listen to all three 334 00:15:23,760 --> 00:15:27,360 Speaker 3: seasons of Making Space with Koto Kape available now. Just 335 00:15:27,400 --> 00:15:29,600 Speaker 3: search making Space wherever you're listening now. 336 00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:40,760 Speaker 1: And you have a very It's such a cliche thing 337 00:15:40,760 --> 00:15:44,239 Speaker 1: to say, but you have a very normal life. Ironically, 338 00:15:44,400 --> 00:15:46,560 Speaker 1: you really do. Like you love going to Rehoboth and 339 00:15:46,640 --> 00:15:48,040 Speaker 1: you want to be in a family and going on 340 00:15:48,040 --> 00:15:52,360 Speaker 1: the bar walk and people leave you alone, engage with you. 341 00:15:52,440 --> 00:15:55,600 Speaker 1: But like you found the balance is the biggest joke 342 00:15:55,640 --> 00:15:57,400 Speaker 1: of a question. But I think if you're present in 343 00:15:57,480 --> 00:16:00,200 Speaker 1: each area of your life, you can accomplish this. I 344 00:16:00,200 --> 00:16:04,480 Speaker 1: think it's entirely possible. Yes, And you're able to be 345 00:16:04,560 --> 00:16:09,120 Speaker 1: so present here and then present there. You don't seem 346 00:16:09,160 --> 00:16:10,080 Speaker 1: to feel the guilt. 347 00:16:09,920 --> 00:16:10,400 Speaker 2: Do you. 348 00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:12,920 Speaker 3: No, I don't, And I'll tell you My mom worked, 349 00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:14,960 Speaker 3: so I don't. I mean she was a working mom, 350 00:16:15,040 --> 00:16:17,160 Speaker 3: so she went to work, and I go to work, 351 00:16:17,160 --> 00:16:18,960 Speaker 3: and I tell my kids I love work and I 352 00:16:19,040 --> 00:16:21,680 Speaker 3: love you so much more. But I want them to 353 00:16:21,720 --> 00:16:24,760 Speaker 3: find something they love. But I think what I do, 354 00:16:25,240 --> 00:16:27,640 Speaker 3: what I try to do, is a real kind of 355 00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:31,480 Speaker 3: be here now situation all the time, and I'm not 356 00:16:31,560 --> 00:16:35,400 Speaker 3: always great at it, but I really try, because like yesterday. 357 00:16:35,440 --> 00:16:37,800 Speaker 3: I mean, I had a horrible parenting day on Sunday. 358 00:16:37,840 --> 00:16:39,880 Speaker 3: No one would go to sleep. I lost it. I 359 00:16:40,120 --> 00:16:43,720 Speaker 3: lost it. It was not pretty right. I hated myself. 360 00:16:43,720 --> 00:16:45,440 Speaker 3: I went to bed. You're the worst, You're the worst. 361 00:16:45,440 --> 00:16:47,840 Speaker 3: You're the worst. And then the next day I woke 362 00:16:47,920 --> 00:16:50,880 Speaker 3: up and I said, I wrote my little journal. I 363 00:16:50,920 --> 00:16:52,880 Speaker 3: was like, Dear God, thank you for a brand new day, 364 00:16:52,920 --> 00:16:55,320 Speaker 3: a day that will never come this way again, or redo, 365 00:16:55,400 --> 00:16:58,680 Speaker 3: a chance for another try. And yet I couldn't shake it. 366 00:16:58,720 --> 00:16:59,960 Speaker 2: You know when you just can't shake it. 367 00:17:00,160 --> 00:17:02,560 Speaker 3: So I take the subway because I like the vibe. 368 00:17:02,800 --> 00:17:04,439 Speaker 3: So I was on the subway and I had this 369 00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:07,320 Speaker 3: weird epiphany and I was like, what if I was 370 00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:10,879 Speaker 3: eighty years old? And I was told God said, you 371 00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:13,359 Speaker 3: know what, you can come back for one day with 372 00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:15,440 Speaker 3: your kids when they were little, and this is the day. 373 00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:18,080 Speaker 2: You get one day to. 374 00:17:18,200 --> 00:17:20,760 Speaker 3: Relive what it was like when your kids were little, 375 00:17:20,960 --> 00:17:24,399 Speaker 3: and this is that day. So on the subway, my 376 00:17:24,440 --> 00:17:26,280 Speaker 3: back got straight or I was like, this is I 377 00:17:26,640 --> 00:17:29,240 Speaker 3: imagined it. I was like, this is the day. 378 00:17:30,359 --> 00:17:31,320 Speaker 2: I took a deep breath. 379 00:17:31,400 --> 00:17:33,840 Speaker 3: I went to pick both kids up from school. Hope 380 00:17:33,880 --> 00:17:36,160 Speaker 3: he was telling me all about her day and why 381 00:17:36,200 --> 00:17:38,359 Speaker 3: she loves her meat sticks or whatever she was eating, 382 00:17:38,400 --> 00:17:40,960 Speaker 3: I can't remember. And then we rode to Haley school 383 00:17:41,359 --> 00:17:44,440 Speaker 3: and Haley came running out and I was like, this 384 00:17:44,560 --> 00:17:46,600 Speaker 3: is I get this day again? 385 00:17:46,880 --> 00:17:47,560 Speaker 2: Yeah? 386 00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:51,000 Speaker 3: And I think sometimes I, you know, like all of us, 387 00:17:51,040 --> 00:17:54,560 Speaker 3: we get all buried in, you know, minutia and stuff, 388 00:17:54,600 --> 00:17:56,920 Speaker 3: and stressful day at works means a stressful day at home. 389 00:17:57,040 --> 00:17:58,200 Speaker 2: And it doesn't. 390 00:17:57,920 --> 00:18:00,440 Speaker 1: Work when you're a little snappy, you're a little impatient. 391 00:18:00,560 --> 00:18:02,160 Speaker 3: And I need to be like that, and I feel 392 00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:04,240 Speaker 3: like it's not me and I want to get rid 393 00:18:04,320 --> 00:18:07,439 Speaker 3: of that part of me because when you wait so 394 00:18:07,600 --> 00:18:10,520 Speaker 3: long for something, it's and you do and you and 395 00:18:10,560 --> 00:18:11,520 Speaker 3: you have a bad day. 396 00:18:11,720 --> 00:18:12,719 Speaker 2: It's a bummer. 397 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:15,719 Speaker 1: It is. But they're not made of glass. They're not 398 00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:17,600 Speaker 1: made of glass there, you know what I mean? You 399 00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:20,879 Speaker 1: could it's and they see they want to see flaws. 400 00:18:20,880 --> 00:18:22,600 Speaker 1: You're not supposed to be perfect, you know what I mean. 401 00:18:22,640 --> 00:18:25,360 Speaker 1: You're not supposed to be perfect at all my opinion, 402 00:18:25,880 --> 00:18:27,720 Speaker 1: and I feel the same way. I think it's the 403 00:18:27,760 --> 00:18:30,119 Speaker 1: presence because I've read a statistic about women in the 404 00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:32,439 Speaker 1: fifties that spent they said they spent less time with 405 00:18:32,520 --> 00:18:36,400 Speaker 1: kids than working moms now because it was smoking a cigaretteesrink 406 00:18:36,480 --> 00:18:37,840 Speaker 1: the wine in the kitchen and let the kid run 407 00:18:37,840 --> 00:18:40,639 Speaker 1: out free range parenting, running with the other chickens in 408 00:18:40,680 --> 00:18:43,280 Speaker 1: the road. So like you didn't see until eight o'clock 409 00:18:43,320 --> 00:18:44,560 Speaker 1: at night. 410 00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:47,240 Speaker 2: Do you know what I mean? Where do you get 411 00:18:47,280 --> 00:18:51,720 Speaker 2: it now? It's so bizarre, you the funniest, So like 412 00:18:51,840 --> 00:18:52,240 Speaker 2: they didn't. 413 00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:53,399 Speaker 1: So we're sting. 414 00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:55,360 Speaker 2: We're spending more time, and we're obsessed. 415 00:18:55,119 --> 00:18:56,760 Speaker 1: With everything being perfect and we're gonna you. 416 00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:58,560 Speaker 3: Know, I think we're messing them up. Like I think 417 00:18:58,560 --> 00:19:00,639 Speaker 3: about this sometimes. Do you want the red pen of 418 00:19:00,680 --> 00:19:03,160 Speaker 3: the purple pen? Do you want the blueberry or the raspberry? 419 00:19:03,280 --> 00:19:05,160 Speaker 1: Well, I'm not because I'm half a sea. 420 00:19:05,440 --> 00:19:05,760 Speaker 2: I'm not. 421 00:19:06,040 --> 00:19:10,000 Speaker 1: I'm I'm like tough titty, tough titty. 422 00:19:10,040 --> 00:19:12,080 Speaker 2: Were you ever like that? Did you ever say, Brent, 423 00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:13,960 Speaker 2: would you like an apple or a pear? 424 00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:17,359 Speaker 1: No? No, I wasn't, but I wanted to. I always 425 00:19:17,359 --> 00:19:18,640 Speaker 1: want to get her what she wants, and I want 426 00:19:18,680 --> 00:19:19,959 Speaker 1: to mean she has a great life, and I go, 427 00:19:20,280 --> 00:19:22,440 Speaker 1: but then there's the line, and when it bends, it bends. 428 00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:24,560 Speaker 1: If it breaks, all how she knows, and I'll look 429 00:19:24,560 --> 00:19:28,480 Speaker 1: at her and she'll be like, oh, now, screwed. Yeah, 430 00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:31,159 Speaker 1: I have a line. I am strict, indulgent. There's a 431 00:19:31,240 --> 00:19:34,560 Speaker 1: line and you cross it and everyone's Christmas is canceled, 432 00:19:34,600 --> 00:19:38,800 Speaker 1: everyone's going home. So yeah, but you know what I mean. Like, 433 00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:41,359 Speaker 1: but I think that the being present thing was the 434 00:19:41,440 --> 00:19:43,560 Speaker 1: key I was on. You always get the same dumb 435 00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:47,040 Speaker 1: question about the bell, and then one day I was like, oh, 436 00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:50,439 Speaker 1: I'm here, and I like what you said. I love working, yeah, 437 00:19:50,480 --> 00:19:52,679 Speaker 1: and I love being a parent. And if you're torn 438 00:19:52,720 --> 00:19:54,880 Speaker 1: in both, than you really messed up. If you're on 439 00:19:54,920 --> 00:19:58,040 Speaker 1: the Today's Show looking at your phone and worried or 440 00:19:58,240 --> 00:20:01,400 Speaker 1: with your kid in the bathtub, and then you gotta. 441 00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:04,280 Speaker 2: Be you gotta be there. That is funny. So yeah, 442 00:20:04,280 --> 00:20:05,720 Speaker 2: I didn't know you were such a strict parent. 443 00:20:06,520 --> 00:20:09,919 Speaker 1: I'm scary, you know what I mean, as you can imagine, 444 00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:13,000 Speaker 1: Not not like I'm strict, but it's a little I'm 445 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:14,800 Speaker 1: a little scary. Like there's a line and we're all 446 00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:16,520 Speaker 1: happy and everyone's having a good time, but when we 447 00:20:16,600 --> 00:20:20,800 Speaker 1: crossed that line, no, thank you, that was unacceptable. Like 448 00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:21,800 Speaker 1: there's a line. 449 00:20:21,600 --> 00:20:24,080 Speaker 3: You think when you think about some I'm not generalizing, 450 00:20:24,119 --> 00:20:25,840 Speaker 3: but I do think some kids who were raised with 451 00:20:25,840 --> 00:20:28,439 Speaker 3: the red pen, blue pen, purple you on a purple crayon. 452 00:20:28,880 --> 00:20:30,600 Speaker 2: And then you get into the workforce. 453 00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:33,560 Speaker 1: You mean like everybody gets in. Yeah, I'm not that parent. 454 00:20:33,640 --> 00:20:36,320 Speaker 3: Well, I think when those kids get into the workforce, 455 00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:40,480 Speaker 3: it's hard because they're used to having choices and things. 456 00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:43,880 Speaker 3: I feel like us were raised kind of more with animals. 457 00:20:44,720 --> 00:20:50,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, wolves, you know what I mean. It's like because I. 458 00:20:50,520 --> 00:20:54,000 Speaker 3: Said so, there's no I mean, I couldn't. I wasn't 459 00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:56,200 Speaker 3: allow to yell or stomp up the stairs. I screamed 460 00:20:56,200 --> 00:20:58,400 Speaker 3: into a pillow for years when I was a kid. 461 00:20:58,640 --> 00:21:01,240 Speaker 3: You just couldn't let it out. It was like it dad, Now, 462 00:21:02,280 --> 00:21:04,320 Speaker 3: that wasn't a great way to grow. 463 00:21:04,280 --> 00:21:06,320 Speaker 1: To No, you want to live in fear. However, my 464 00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:07,560 Speaker 1: daughter doesn't really live in fear. 465 00:21:07,840 --> 00:21:10,200 Speaker 3: But however, you can navigate the world, and you can 466 00:21:10,280 --> 00:21:12,080 Speaker 3: go to therapy as a grown up. But I think 467 00:21:12,080 --> 00:21:14,160 Speaker 3: the kids who have a million choices sometimes I wonder 468 00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:16,800 Speaker 3: if your job is to prepare them for adulthood and 469 00:21:16,880 --> 00:21:20,240 Speaker 3: get them ready so for rejection and for no, you 470 00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:21,159 Speaker 3: don't always get it. 471 00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:22,639 Speaker 2: Actually you're not gonna get it. You're no. 472 00:21:22,720 --> 00:21:25,480 Speaker 1: Well, that's why so many Harvard graduates don't find the 473 00:21:25,560 --> 00:21:27,720 Speaker 1: great jobs because they were told their whole life, you're brilliant. 474 00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:27,800 Speaker 2: You're smart. 475 00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:30,040 Speaker 1: To going to Harvard, it's amazing, WinCE. Parents are impressed 476 00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:32,040 Speaker 1: and then they get out and like life is tough 477 00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:32,640 Speaker 1: no matter. 478 00:21:32,600 --> 00:21:34,200 Speaker 2: What school you are. Yeah, yeah, if you. 479 00:21:34,119 --> 00:21:36,119 Speaker 1: Didn't go, if you went, so I agree with you. 480 00:21:36,200 --> 00:21:39,720 Speaker 1: Yeah no, I'm like she would you know, mommy, I'm 481 00:21:39,720 --> 00:21:41,400 Speaker 1: not good at the sport or something, and I'll set 482 00:21:41,440 --> 00:21:44,040 Speaker 1: her up to succeed. But if she's not practicing a lot, 483 00:21:44,119 --> 00:21:46,640 Speaker 1: or if she's not doing well, I'll say, like, this 484 00:21:46,680 --> 00:21:48,959 Speaker 1: person's great, like they are. You're great at something, You're 485 00:21:48,960 --> 00:21:52,240 Speaker 1: not gonna be great at everything. And listen, you're not 486 00:21:52,280 --> 00:21:53,879 Speaker 1: gonna be You might not be an NBA player. You 487 00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:56,720 Speaker 1: should practice, feel good about yourself, build yourself up, set 488 00:21:56,720 --> 00:21:59,600 Speaker 1: yourself to succeed. But it's okay you're not and not 489 00:21:59,640 --> 00:22:02,080 Speaker 1: everybody to metal and that everyone hits a run, and 490 00:22:02,119 --> 00:22:05,480 Speaker 1: I think it's great to let them. Yeah, No, totally important, 491 00:22:05,600 --> 00:22:08,320 Speaker 1: and it's sometimes it is the tough shit program. You know, 492 00:22:08,359 --> 00:22:11,800 Speaker 1: I'm very indulgent, but I think you're right with what 493 00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:14,280 Speaker 1: you're saying. It's what you're saying is it's hard to 494 00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:17,480 Speaker 1: raise a child when you've kind of paved the way 495 00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:19,679 Speaker 1: for them a little bit financially, and the way that 496 00:22:19,720 --> 00:22:22,480 Speaker 1: you travel and the things that you just naturally do. 497 00:22:22,520 --> 00:22:24,880 Speaker 1: We get to do things that other kids and parents 498 00:22:24,920 --> 00:22:26,679 Speaker 1: don't get to do. If it could be meeting Santa 499 00:22:26,680 --> 00:22:28,639 Speaker 1: Claus without having to sit on the line or whatever 500 00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:31,199 Speaker 1: the thing is. And I often think about that, like, 501 00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:34,920 Speaker 1: she doesn't have the same struggles, right, and yet she's 502 00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:37,160 Speaker 1: also not a nervous wreck half the time like I am. 503 00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:40,600 Speaker 1: She's more free. So I think it goes both ways. 504 00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:45,560 Speaker 1: You have to balance that. I think. So are you 505 00:22:45,680 --> 00:22:48,600 Speaker 1: still as driven with work? Like what now? Because for me, 506 00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:51,879 Speaker 1: I'm I don't want to say the back nine. That's depressing. 507 00:22:52,119 --> 00:22:55,679 Speaker 1: But you know, I think about I feel sometimes retired, 508 00:22:55,760 --> 00:22:57,960 Speaker 1: Like sometimes I don't have to do anything if I 509 00:22:57,960 --> 00:23:00,000 Speaker 1: don't want. Most a lot of times I do think 510 00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:02,359 Speaker 1: because I want to, but most of the time I 511 00:23:02,400 --> 00:23:06,800 Speaker 1: don't really have to. And you work in a corporate environment. 512 00:23:07,080 --> 00:23:07,440 Speaker 3: You have. 513 00:23:08,920 --> 00:23:12,400 Speaker 1: Gone all the way up the chain and you still have, 514 00:23:13,720 --> 00:23:17,280 Speaker 1: you know, people to answer to and laws to abide 515 00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:20,040 Speaker 1: by in the workplace, and you have to play the game. 516 00:23:20,240 --> 00:23:21,800 Speaker 1: You're still playing the corporate game. And you have a 517 00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:25,159 Speaker 1: lot of freedom. So how do you stay motivated a 518 00:23:25,320 --> 00:23:26,640 Speaker 1: to be here? And what does it all mean? Because 519 00:23:26,640 --> 00:23:27,919 Speaker 1: as we get older, I think you're thinking, what am 520 00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:28,240 Speaker 1: I doing? 521 00:23:28,280 --> 00:23:28,719 Speaker 2: What is this? 522 00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:30,600 Speaker 1: What we Why are we here? Why are we working? 523 00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:32,200 Speaker 1: Why we're not working? What should we be doing? Is 524 00:23:32,240 --> 00:23:32,800 Speaker 1: this purposeful? 525 00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:35,200 Speaker 3: I do think, I do think we all start to question, 526 00:23:35,440 --> 00:23:37,320 Speaker 3: like our purpose, like why, because. 527 00:23:37,119 --> 00:23:39,760 Speaker 2: You're here for You're here for a reason, I mean. 528 00:23:39,800 --> 00:23:44,520 Speaker 3: And that's important. And sometimes I think I'm on the market. 529 00:23:44,600 --> 00:23:46,760 Speaker 3: Sometimes I think I'm missing it. I think that made 530 00:23:46,840 --> 00:23:50,000 Speaker 3: my The thing that made my career interesting and makes 531 00:23:50,040 --> 00:23:52,920 Speaker 3: it interesting here is I don't think I've ever had 532 00:23:52,960 --> 00:23:56,520 Speaker 3: the same job for that long a period of time. 533 00:23:56,680 --> 00:23:59,800 Speaker 3: I mean long in regular people's but not in this world. 534 00:23:59,840 --> 00:24:03,000 Speaker 3: So I worked a dateline for ten eleven years or 535 00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:06,639 Speaker 3: whatever it was. That was a whole career in dateline. 536 00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:09,600 Speaker 3: Then I got the job with kath So I worked 537 00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:11,520 Speaker 3: with Kathy Lee on the ten. 538 00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:14,520 Speaker 1: For and that was risky. That was like, now we 539 00:24:14,560 --> 00:24:16,959 Speaker 1: can think it's all fun and games, but that was risky. 540 00:24:17,440 --> 00:24:19,200 Speaker 1: That's not a normal transition. 541 00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:22,320 Speaker 3: Well what was weird was, first of all, she chose me, 542 00:24:22,359 --> 00:24:25,600 Speaker 3: and secondly, as you know what, I'd spent my whole 543 00:24:25,600 --> 00:24:29,040 Speaker 3: career doing hard news, like I was in Afghanistan and 544 00:24:29,080 --> 00:24:31,359 Speaker 3: I went to all to Iraq when this when Saddam 545 00:24:31,400 --> 00:24:34,600 Speaker 3: Hussein statue fell, and I was in all the places, 546 00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:36,240 Speaker 3: and we were in the West Bank and Gaza and 547 00:24:36,320 --> 00:24:39,040 Speaker 3: they were shooting all over like all that stuff I 548 00:24:39,160 --> 00:24:41,280 Speaker 3: was doing, and then all of a sudden, I was 549 00:24:41,320 --> 00:24:42,840 Speaker 3: going to like this, laughing and scratching. 550 00:24:42,840 --> 00:24:44,400 Speaker 1: All of a sudden, you were doing Rose all day, 551 00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:48,280 Speaker 1: like from Afghanistan to Rose all day, right. 552 00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:51,520 Speaker 3: And I wasn't sure, like when you do all that 553 00:24:51,680 --> 00:24:55,720 Speaker 3: work pre game, is that the right path, because you 554 00:24:55,760 --> 00:24:58,560 Speaker 3: don't know. But one thing I did know was when 555 00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:02,480 Speaker 3: I sat with Kathy Lee, I was happy. And when 556 00:25:02,560 --> 00:25:06,000 Speaker 3: I was in those scary places, I was putting a 557 00:25:06,080 --> 00:25:08,960 Speaker 3: circle on a square. I was trying to be a 558 00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:12,600 Speaker 3: war correspondent. I was trying to be the person who 559 00:25:12,760 --> 00:25:15,919 Speaker 3: interviewed all these, you know, different kinds of people. I 560 00:25:16,040 --> 00:25:18,440 Speaker 3: tried to sit across from people in Rikers Island who 561 00:25:18,440 --> 00:25:22,360 Speaker 3: had you know, killed their whoever, and interviewed them. But 562 00:25:22,760 --> 00:25:26,679 Speaker 3: deep down, I don't that was not hitting for me. 563 00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:29,439 Speaker 3: I could do it, and I enjoyed human nature and 564 00:25:29,480 --> 00:25:32,000 Speaker 3: why good for you? 565 00:25:32,160 --> 00:25:34,639 Speaker 1: Yeah, you also probably it was probably a little trapping. 566 00:25:34,680 --> 00:25:36,760 Speaker 1: I mean the story you just told, I think you're 567 00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:39,720 Speaker 1: a messenger. The story you told before about it just 568 00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:42,639 Speaker 1: will inspire so many people about doing something that they 569 00:25:42,680 --> 00:25:44,560 Speaker 1: thought didn't apply to them, but that they couldn't do it. 570 00:25:44,720 --> 00:25:47,800 Speaker 1: Every day, you're you always have some pearl of wisdom 571 00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:51,439 Speaker 1: or some message. You're very very strong messenger. And I 572 00:25:51,480 --> 00:25:55,879 Speaker 1: feel like maybe reporting news with facts and details can 573 00:25:55,920 --> 00:25:59,919 Speaker 1: probably be constricting and so serious that you have ah 574 00:26:00,240 --> 00:26:02,760 Speaker 1: other part of you. It's not an easy transition to 575 00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:05,600 Speaker 1: make because you probably thought, am I going to be 576 00:26:05,640 --> 00:26:07,639 Speaker 1: taken seriously? I tried to go in the other direction. 577 00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:10,880 Speaker 1: I've tried to be the person on train Wreck television 578 00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:14,280 Speaker 1: and then rinse with your technique that you taught us 579 00:26:14,320 --> 00:26:16,800 Speaker 1: on television, soap and water to wash dishes. So I 580 00:26:16,840 --> 00:26:19,520 Speaker 1: tried to then rinse my own career and be taken 581 00:26:19,560 --> 00:26:22,480 Speaker 1: seriously with business. And you know, and it's not that easy. 582 00:26:22,720 --> 00:26:23,240 Speaker 1: That's different. 583 00:26:23,280 --> 00:26:24,720 Speaker 2: It's hard. It's hard both ways. 584 00:26:24,800 --> 00:26:27,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, you tried to fall up. You tried to fuck 585 00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:29,159 Speaker 1: up a whole wet dream is what you tried to do. 586 00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:30,840 Speaker 1: You were like, I have a very serious career. I've 587 00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:33,360 Speaker 1: taken serious. I'm doing hard news, or I could sit 588 00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:37,800 Speaker 1: down and do cheese and wine with Kathy two literally. 589 00:26:37,560 --> 00:26:41,600 Speaker 3: Did I realized that when you're happy, everything in life 590 00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:43,960 Speaker 3: is better. And all of a sudden, I felt like 591 00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:46,480 Speaker 3: I'd been swimming upstream my whole life, and suddenly I 592 00:26:46,520 --> 00:26:48,240 Speaker 3: was riding a wave. And I didn't even know what 593 00:26:48,320 --> 00:26:50,800 Speaker 3: riding away felt like. I thought life was always swimming upstream. 594 00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:52,879 Speaker 3: I thought it was supposed to be a struggle. I 595 00:26:52,880 --> 00:26:54,800 Speaker 3: thought I was supposed to have notts in my stomach. 596 00:26:54,920 --> 00:26:56,680 Speaker 3: I thought it was supposed to be scared. 597 00:26:56,720 --> 00:26:57,399 Speaker 2: Am I going to do it? 598 00:26:57,440 --> 00:26:59,320 Speaker 3: I thought I was always supposed to feel that way, 599 00:26:59,400 --> 00:27:02,920 Speaker 3: because when you do something that's meaningful, it must be hard. 600 00:27:03,480 --> 00:27:04,800 Speaker 2: Well that's not true. 601 00:27:04,760 --> 00:27:06,919 Speaker 1: Right, No, that's not true. And also I feel like 602 00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:09,359 Speaker 1: this place because we're here at NBC, I think this 603 00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:12,000 Speaker 1: place has allowed you to be a Swiss army knife, 604 00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:14,000 Speaker 1: Like they need you to report on something very seriously. 605 00:27:14,240 --> 00:27:17,119 Speaker 1: You're here, do it like you have every single you 606 00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:19,520 Speaker 1: can do a cooking segment, you could talk to Jenna, 607 00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:22,359 Speaker 1: you could talk about serious medical issues, talk about it. 608 00:27:22,520 --> 00:27:24,600 Speaker 1: I mean, that's like you've been an amazing asset and 609 00:27:24,600 --> 00:27:28,320 Speaker 1: they've allowed you to. That's pretty you know, I. 610 00:27:28,280 --> 00:27:30,040 Speaker 2: Think because my career kept changing. 611 00:27:30,080 --> 00:27:34,399 Speaker 3: So then after Kathy Lee, that was when everything happened 612 00:27:34,440 --> 00:27:36,960 Speaker 3: here with Matt and then I ended up doing anchoring 613 00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:39,600 Speaker 3: with Savannah and that's been a whole new I think 614 00:27:39,680 --> 00:27:42,120 Speaker 3: we've been five years, is that right? So that's only 615 00:27:42,119 --> 00:27:45,000 Speaker 3: been augh that's been five So when you think about it, 616 00:27:45,080 --> 00:27:48,200 Speaker 3: each chapter has been different, and I think that's why 617 00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:49,639 Speaker 3: it's still It's always. 618 00:27:49,359 --> 00:27:50,000 Speaker 2: Been fun for me. 619 00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:51,960 Speaker 1: It felt like you're on a new show, like. 620 00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:52,720 Speaker 2: Oh, what's this show? 621 00:27:52,760 --> 00:27:53,000 Speaker 1: Oh? 622 00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:56,080 Speaker 3: Because being you know, being on the seven is a 623 00:27:56,080 --> 00:28:00,200 Speaker 3: whole different ballgame, and it has its heavy stuff because 624 00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:02,240 Speaker 3: you're setting the tone for the day. But you get 625 00:28:02,280 --> 00:28:04,639 Speaker 3: to you know, all the A listers love to be 626 00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:06,400 Speaker 3: on the eight and it's fun to sit with them 627 00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:09,040 Speaker 3: and you get you get a good mix and Jenna 628 00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:11,359 Speaker 3: and I it's a much looser vibe and a hole 629 00:28:11,560 --> 00:28:12,080 Speaker 3: just to hang. 630 00:28:12,160 --> 00:28:14,720 Speaker 2: So that's different. So I think I think it's. 631 00:28:14,520 --> 00:28:17,320 Speaker 3: Felt that way, but I do I do want to 632 00:28:17,359 --> 00:28:19,399 Speaker 3: make sure that in my life, Like I feel like 633 00:28:19,440 --> 00:28:21,120 Speaker 3: there's a really good saying if you have a little, 634 00:28:21,119 --> 00:28:22,480 Speaker 3: give a little, and if you have a lot give 635 00:28:22,520 --> 00:28:25,359 Speaker 3: a lot, like you have to, you have to walk 636 00:28:25,400 --> 00:28:29,760 Speaker 3: the walk, and it's not you know, the idea of 637 00:28:29,880 --> 00:28:33,119 Speaker 3: having something bigger, having something more is not appealing to. 638 00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:37,080 Speaker 2: Me at all. I don't want anything more than what 639 00:28:37,119 --> 00:28:37,399 Speaker 2: I have. 640 00:28:37,640 --> 00:28:39,840 Speaker 1: I love that nobody has anything that you want. 641 00:28:40,080 --> 00:28:41,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's how I feel exactly. 642 00:28:41,520 --> 00:28:43,400 Speaker 1: I feel exactly you. It's what you're you're doing, what 643 00:28:43,520 --> 00:28:44,640 Speaker 1: you want or what feels added. 644 00:28:45,000 --> 00:28:47,520 Speaker 3: But like you that I like it right, and I don't. 645 00:28:47,720 --> 00:28:50,080 Speaker 3: It's like that analogy of you know, how some people 646 00:28:50,120 --> 00:28:51,880 Speaker 3: like I was. There's this story of a little kid 647 00:28:51,880 --> 00:28:54,080 Speaker 3: who's running down the street and he's having so much fun. 648 00:28:54,120 --> 00:28:56,200 Speaker 3: He's on the sidewalk and he's running and he's like, 649 00:28:56,240 --> 00:28:58,080 Speaker 3: this is the best. Look how fast I'm running. And 650 00:28:58,120 --> 00:28:59,960 Speaker 3: he looks over at the sidewalk on the other side 651 00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:02,320 Speaker 3: the street and there's another kid running, and all of 652 00:29:02,320 --> 00:29:04,719 Speaker 3: a sudden he realizes they're kind of racing, and he's like, oh, 653 00:29:05,120 --> 00:29:06,760 Speaker 3: I gotta keep And then all of a sudden, it 654 00:29:06,800 --> 00:29:10,840 Speaker 3: went from this blissful, beautiful moment to now this kid's faster. 655 00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:13,000 Speaker 3: So he hangs he stops and he hangs his head. 656 00:29:13,480 --> 00:29:17,440 Speaker 3: I'm slow, I'm no good A run your race, like 657 00:29:17,600 --> 00:29:20,440 Speaker 3: stop looking at the kid on the other side of 658 00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:21,240 Speaker 3: the sidewalk. 659 00:29:21,480 --> 00:29:22,960 Speaker 2: And I feel that way about life. 660 00:29:23,280 --> 00:29:25,880 Speaker 3: It's like you walk into Howard Stearn's house and it's 661 00:29:25,880 --> 00:29:28,160 Speaker 3: so fancy and you say, oh god, why don't I 662 00:29:28,160 --> 00:29:33,000 Speaker 3: have Italian marble? No, like, that's not it. And then 663 00:29:33,080 --> 00:29:35,920 Speaker 3: what like you're insatiable. You'll have your whole life going 664 00:29:35,960 --> 00:29:37,880 Speaker 3: do they have copper piping at their house? 665 00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:39,400 Speaker 1: But it's great to not have that, to just not 666 00:29:39,440 --> 00:29:40,240 Speaker 1: want care. 667 00:29:40,360 --> 00:29:42,600 Speaker 2: I know, I know who cares. 668 00:29:42,680 --> 00:29:47,400 Speaker 1: I don't people care deeply? Why because it's the scoreboard 669 00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:49,080 Speaker 1: and it's Cora, that's what. But by the way, that's 670 00:29:49,080 --> 00:29:51,120 Speaker 1: what all. That's what. That's what these shows are like 671 00:29:51,240 --> 00:29:52,840 Speaker 1: it's called it doesn't I just said it today. It 672 00:29:52,920 --> 00:29:55,640 Speaker 1: doesn't matter if you actually have money. It just matters 673 00:29:55,640 --> 00:29:58,640 Speaker 1: if you look like it. And these are scorecards. And 674 00:29:58,640 --> 00:30:01,920 Speaker 1: and you've loved, longed for being a mother and been 675 00:30:01,960 --> 00:30:04,760 Speaker 1: through medical challenges and I think you just have a 676 00:30:04,760 --> 00:30:08,080 Speaker 1: different perspective. And that's not you realize that it's fool's gold. 677 00:30:08,600 --> 00:30:11,000 Speaker 1: There's no they're there. You're never gonna get there. Yeah. 678 00:30:11,040 --> 00:30:13,440 Speaker 3: No, it's like the its you can't scratch enjoy like 679 00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:16,840 Speaker 3: life is going to be like that. And they always say, like, 680 00:30:16,880 --> 00:30:19,560 Speaker 3: the happiest people are the people who make enough money 681 00:30:19,720 --> 00:30:22,840 Speaker 3: to pay their bills and go on to vacations a year. 682 00:30:23,120 --> 00:30:26,000 Speaker 3: If you make less, it's horrible and miserable, and if 683 00:30:26,040 --> 00:30:30,040 Speaker 3: you make more, you're always preoccupied with some bs. I 684 00:30:30,040 --> 00:30:34,040 Speaker 3: still remember we got some weird ac thing in our 685 00:30:34,080 --> 00:30:36,680 Speaker 3: apartment and it was like on the phone, and so 686 00:30:36,880 --> 00:30:39,760 Speaker 3: it wasn't working. So what happened for forty five minutes? 687 00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:42,520 Speaker 3: Why isn't the thing working on the wall from my phone? 688 00:30:42,600 --> 00:30:44,760 Speaker 2: Think? Why did I even have that? 689 00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:45,320 Speaker 1: Right? 690 00:30:45,600 --> 00:30:48,680 Speaker 3: Stop getting things that are making you spend more time 691 00:30:49,040 --> 00:30:50,800 Speaker 3: taking care of those things. 692 00:30:51,040 --> 00:30:53,600 Speaker 1: Yes, it's like have less, it's owning you. 693 00:30:53,840 --> 00:30:54,960 Speaker 2: Yes, that's what I feel like. 694 00:30:54,960 --> 00:30:57,320 Speaker 3: It's sometimes some things are dinky, small like that, and 695 00:30:57,320 --> 00:30:58,120 Speaker 3: some things are big. 696 00:30:58,640 --> 00:31:00,480 Speaker 2: You know. It's like someone complaining they got to the car. 697 00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:02,240 Speaker 2: Can you believe what happened in my car? It's like, 698 00:31:02,280 --> 00:31:04,600 Speaker 2: don't tell me, right, I don't care about your flat tire? 699 00:31:04,840 --> 00:31:05,360 Speaker 2: Right right? 700 00:31:05,480 --> 00:31:09,440 Speaker 1: Yes, yes, I really really do get because I feel 701 00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:12,280 Speaker 1: like I still do. You remember what it was like 702 00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:15,080 Speaker 1: to be really broke, Like it's nervous. It's not that 703 00:31:15,120 --> 00:31:17,320 Speaker 1: far away. It's not that it's not that far away. 704 00:31:17,920 --> 00:31:21,400 Speaker 1: And I can't even believe. I remember when I couldn't 705 00:31:21,400 --> 00:31:23,360 Speaker 1: take a taxi from uptown to downtown, Like I was 706 00:31:23,360 --> 00:31:24,760 Speaker 1: the one that was walking, and it was like my 707 00:31:24,800 --> 00:31:26,640 Speaker 1: great fitness because I'd be doing with the twenty blocks 708 00:31:26,680 --> 00:31:28,920 Speaker 1: is a mile and at night it was didn't feel 709 00:31:28,920 --> 00:31:30,960 Speaker 1: as safe to be taking the train, so I'd try 710 00:31:30,960 --> 00:31:32,720 Speaker 1: to walk or go to dinner early. And sometimes you 711 00:31:32,840 --> 00:31:34,640 Speaker 1: have to take a taxi and it was sixty second 712 00:31:34,680 --> 00:31:36,800 Speaker 1: Street to get down to West Broadway. It was like 713 00:31:36,840 --> 00:31:39,160 Speaker 1: twenty six dollars. And I tell you that was like 714 00:31:39,720 --> 00:31:41,840 Speaker 1: there was no way you were just doing it on 715 00:31:41,880 --> 00:31:44,320 Speaker 1: your credit card. I'd always get in sufficient funds and 716 00:31:44,360 --> 00:31:46,360 Speaker 1: then it's like a domino effect. Then you get the 717 00:31:46,440 --> 00:31:48,280 Speaker 1: other funds and then you bounce all the checks and 718 00:31:48,320 --> 00:31:51,040 Speaker 1: begging on the phone and mad at that person for 719 00:31:51,080 --> 00:31:54,880 Speaker 1: not giving you a refund. And I if you have 720 00:31:55,000 --> 00:31:57,680 Speaker 1: that feeling inside I have, I will always have a 721 00:31:57,720 --> 00:31:59,880 Speaker 1: little noise about it, Like I still can't believe that's 722 00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:01,880 Speaker 1: the only thing I have imposter syndrome, But I can't 723 00:32:01,920 --> 00:32:03,840 Speaker 1: believe I could pet I don't get I get to 724 00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:05,400 Speaker 1: I want to do that, so I get to do that. 725 00:32:05,680 --> 00:32:06,840 Speaker 1: What do you mean I want to eat that? So 726 00:32:06,840 --> 00:32:08,920 Speaker 1: I get to like I get to go today to 727 00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:11,760 Speaker 1: seven cookie places and like do a cookie crawl, and 728 00:32:11,760 --> 00:32:13,800 Speaker 1: like I can afford to buy the chocolate cookies. I 729 00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:15,440 Speaker 1: know it sounds crazy. It's not the big stuff, it's 730 00:32:15,480 --> 00:32:17,080 Speaker 1: not the house. I can't believe I could buy like 731 00:32:17,120 --> 00:32:19,479 Speaker 1: a bunch of chocolate and cookies for everybody today, Like 732 00:32:19,720 --> 00:32:22,160 Speaker 1: it sounds ridiculous, but that's because it's not that long ago. 733 00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:24,040 Speaker 1: And I like that I have that because it does 734 00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:27,360 Speaker 1: make you realize the value and also makes you a 735 00:32:27,360 --> 00:32:31,400 Speaker 1: good tipper because you know, because you know that that 736 00:32:31,480 --> 00:32:34,240 Speaker 1: person that that money, Yeah, the ten dollars on the 737 00:32:34,240 --> 00:32:37,680 Speaker 1: ten dollars cookie things today like ment everything, everything to that. 738 00:32:37,720 --> 00:32:39,360 Speaker 3: I remember I used to work at Ponderosa and I 739 00:32:39,360 --> 00:32:42,360 Speaker 3: still remember you. You'd work your tail off and they'd 740 00:32:42,360 --> 00:32:44,000 Speaker 3: get and some people wouldn't tip at all, and you 741 00:32:44,000 --> 00:32:47,600 Speaker 3: were like, I cannot believe this tip man. I mean, 742 00:32:47,600 --> 00:32:49,920 Speaker 3: that's one of my big, big big pep peepig saying 743 00:32:50,000 --> 00:32:52,240 Speaker 3: yeah that that that tells you everything about a person. 744 00:32:52,360 --> 00:32:54,120 Speaker 1: I know it's not fair that it's like a lottery, 745 00:32:54,320 --> 00:32:55,840 Speaker 1: that it's like a lottery, they get good or a 746 00:32:55,840 --> 00:32:56,840 Speaker 1: bad tip for a kid. 747 00:32:56,960 --> 00:32:57,560 Speaker 2: I'll tell you later. 748 00:32:57,560 --> 00:32:59,280 Speaker 1: I have a whole different app for that because I 749 00:32:59,280 --> 00:33:00,440 Speaker 1: thought there has to be a way. 750 00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:03,520 Speaker 2: Who cares, No I do. It's another idea that you're 751 00:33:03,520 --> 00:33:03,800 Speaker 2: gonna have. 752 00:33:03,800 --> 00:33:05,840 Speaker 1: It's gonna yeah, we need any more ideas. It's it's 753 00:33:05,840 --> 00:33:09,160 Speaker 1: one hundred percent positive. So do you worry about are 754 00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:11,360 Speaker 1: you vain? I've never really thought, yeah, you're not vain. 755 00:33:11,760 --> 00:33:14,200 Speaker 2: We're it's actually interestingly, you're the same. You don't care. 756 00:33:14,440 --> 00:33:14,920 Speaker 1: I really know. 757 00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:18,160 Speaker 3: Wow, clearly remember today when you showed up from your pajamas. 758 00:33:18,440 --> 00:33:20,040 Speaker 3: But you know what, I love you roll up the 759 00:33:20,040 --> 00:33:23,440 Speaker 3: thirty Rock in your slippers. There's like eight thousand boparazzi 760 00:33:23,520 --> 00:33:26,840 Speaker 3: outside and you're just rolling hot, you know what? And 761 00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:28,480 Speaker 3: it's it's everything you post. 762 00:33:28,720 --> 00:33:32,080 Speaker 1: You don't care, because let's pretend I do. What's happening, 763 00:33:32,200 --> 00:33:34,840 Speaker 1: what's gonna happen? What happens? I look the best them? 764 00:33:34,960 --> 00:33:37,480 Speaker 1: Am I getting a prize? Am I getting another cookie? 765 00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:40,360 Speaker 1: I want to understand if I look perfect, what's gonna 766 00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:43,640 Speaker 1: fucking happen? I don't understand if I don't look perfect, 767 00:33:43,640 --> 00:33:47,480 Speaker 1: there's no bar. This is the bottom. You can't expect, like, 768 00:33:47,680 --> 00:33:51,239 Speaker 1: I don't understand what is gonna happen? But why are 769 00:33:51,240 --> 00:33:53,840 Speaker 1: people upset? What you're talking about? The money? Why are 770 00:33:53,880 --> 00:33:58,080 Speaker 1: people upset? Why is everybody a filter? Why? But what 771 00:33:58,120 --> 00:33:58,800 Speaker 1: are we doing? 772 00:33:59,040 --> 00:33:59,520 Speaker 2: We know? 773 00:34:00,360 --> 00:34:02,360 Speaker 1: Well, we don't know. I don't know. But you look 774 00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:04,680 Speaker 1: like a clown and you look perfect. I acknowledge it. 775 00:34:04,840 --> 00:34:07,440 Speaker 1: What do we do now? What happens next? You're perfect? 776 00:34:07,480 --> 00:34:11,520 Speaker 1: I don't get it. Just tell me you're smart. I 777 00:34:11,560 --> 00:34:13,240 Speaker 1: want to know what happens if I walk in today, 778 00:34:13,239 --> 00:34:15,640 Speaker 1: it look perfect? Do I get you? Guys gonna pay 779 00:34:15,640 --> 00:34:17,720 Speaker 1: me to come next time? What's gonna happen? 780 00:34:18,840 --> 00:34:20,480 Speaker 2: We'll never pay you people like me? 781 00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:22,800 Speaker 1: I don't know, So I don't know. 782 00:34:23,080 --> 00:34:25,640 Speaker 2: My God, that makes me laugh. It is so true. 783 00:34:25,800 --> 00:34:27,359 Speaker 1: So that's the only thing. I'm a path at least 784 00:34:27,360 --> 00:34:28,319 Speaker 1: resistance kind of gal. 785 00:34:28,760 --> 00:34:30,920 Speaker 3: I think it's funny, but you always know, Like I 786 00:34:30,960 --> 00:34:33,560 Speaker 3: there was I was somewhere out and my caller was 787 00:34:33,560 --> 00:34:36,000 Speaker 3: flipped in, which is I can't even believe it was 788 00:34:36,080 --> 00:34:38,640 Speaker 3: even you know, functioning, but there was on It. 789 00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:42,239 Speaker 2: Was like your call your caller. I was like, what 790 00:34:41,640 --> 00:34:44,640 Speaker 2: what what happened your caller? It's flipped backwards? 791 00:34:45,120 --> 00:34:48,360 Speaker 3: I was, but but it does show you that I 792 00:34:48,400 --> 00:34:51,879 Speaker 3: think there is something about how you present yourself that 793 00:34:52,040 --> 00:34:53,680 Speaker 3: people think matters. 794 00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:54,440 Speaker 2: I don't. 795 00:34:54,920 --> 00:34:57,200 Speaker 1: I but you really care that you care, you care, 796 00:34:57,320 --> 00:35:01,440 Speaker 1: like and you do care. Yeah, if I make an effort, 797 00:35:01,960 --> 00:35:04,480 Speaker 1: I'd like the painting to come out nice, because that 798 00:35:04,560 --> 00:35:06,880 Speaker 1: often happens too for me. Like I'll do make an 799 00:35:06,920 --> 00:35:08,879 Speaker 1: effort and then something's wrong, and I'm like, I came 800 00:35:08,920 --> 00:35:10,960 Speaker 1: all this way. I have a I do have a 801 00:35:11,000 --> 00:35:13,680 Speaker 1: struggle with all that because I was when I used 802 00:35:13,719 --> 00:35:16,799 Speaker 1: to live on sixty Secondary and I wasn't known. I 803 00:35:16,880 --> 00:35:19,520 Speaker 1: used to go to Starbucks in my cow pajamas because 804 00:35:19,760 --> 00:35:21,479 Speaker 1: and like pimple medicine, I don't none of us people 805 00:35:21,560 --> 00:35:22,280 Speaker 1: know who cares? 806 00:35:22,320 --> 00:35:23,080 Speaker 2: I care? 807 00:35:23,239 --> 00:35:26,879 Speaker 1: And yeah, because I didn't understand what's the difference. I'm 808 00:35:26,880 --> 00:35:28,719 Speaker 1: a person, I have pajamas and I want coffee. These 809 00:35:28,719 --> 00:35:30,600 Speaker 1: are things are happening at the same time. Why I 810 00:35:30,600 --> 00:35:32,680 Speaker 1: get dressed up with the eyelashes on to go to 811 00:35:32,680 --> 00:35:35,200 Speaker 1: Star Wars I don't understand. I've never understood. 812 00:35:35,680 --> 00:35:37,839 Speaker 2: So that's so we're both not vain. That's good. 813 00:35:37,920 --> 00:35:39,960 Speaker 1: So we're both not van and No, but where are 814 00:35:39,960 --> 00:35:42,880 Speaker 1: you with age? Because age is a different thing that 815 00:35:42,920 --> 00:35:45,439 Speaker 1: we think about with health and being there for your kids, 816 00:35:45,480 --> 00:35:47,600 Speaker 1: and that's anxiety. You must have that anxiety. 817 00:35:47,719 --> 00:35:52,319 Speaker 3: I do have it sometimes. But my dad died when 818 00:35:52,320 --> 00:35:58,120 Speaker 3: he was fifty four, fifty four, fifty five. His birthday, 819 00:35:58,120 --> 00:36:00,200 Speaker 3: in fact, was May twenty ninth. It just passed and 820 00:36:00,239 --> 00:36:01,680 Speaker 3: so he passed away. 821 00:36:01,719 --> 00:36:01,879 Speaker 2: Then. 822 00:36:02,719 --> 00:36:07,840 Speaker 3: Now I always think that the foundation he laid down 823 00:36:08,680 --> 00:36:09,680 Speaker 3: was good for me. 824 00:36:10,239 --> 00:36:13,000 Speaker 2: It helped me in my life. And sometimes I do 825 00:36:13,080 --> 00:36:13,399 Speaker 2: the math. 826 00:36:13,520 --> 00:36:16,040 Speaker 3: I look at my mom, who's eighty six, and I 827 00:36:16,040 --> 00:36:18,400 Speaker 3: think to myself, Okay, what's the difference here between me 828 00:36:18,480 --> 00:36:22,279 Speaker 3: and heart thirty? It's almost okay, Okay, that's kind of good. 829 00:36:22,560 --> 00:36:26,080 Speaker 3: So let's see thirty years. Okay, So I add thirty 830 00:36:26,120 --> 00:36:28,640 Speaker 3: to Haley and I had thirty to Hope, and I 831 00:36:28,640 --> 00:36:31,480 Speaker 3: think to myself, won't that be spectacular? 832 00:36:31,760 --> 00:36:32,000 Speaker 1: Yes? 833 00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:35,200 Speaker 2: I can do that. Wouldn't that be amazing? Like do 834 00:36:35,280 --> 00:36:36,800 Speaker 2: I get to see them get married? 835 00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:41,640 Speaker 3: Maybe that would be really good. Or do I get 836 00:36:41,680 --> 00:36:43,719 Speaker 3: to see them have a child, maybe. 837 00:36:44,200 --> 00:36:45,520 Speaker 2: But that would be really good. 838 00:36:45,640 --> 00:36:48,600 Speaker 3: Yeah, Like I think about it, but I don't think 839 00:36:48,640 --> 00:36:53,560 Speaker 3: about it on the end of Oh no, I won't 840 00:36:53,600 --> 00:36:58,439 Speaker 3: be able to yes, no, yeah, no, no, I would 841 00:36:58,480 --> 00:37:03,480 Speaker 3: be delighted. If all those things were possible, and I 842 00:37:03,480 --> 00:37:05,840 Speaker 3: think that that could that would be special. 843 00:37:06,120 --> 00:37:07,560 Speaker 2: And I think it happened in the shower. 844 00:37:07,600 --> 00:37:12,680 Speaker 3: I literally wrote on the glass my mom's age minus 845 00:37:12,840 --> 00:37:15,439 Speaker 3: my age, and I looked at the number and I. 846 00:37:15,440 --> 00:37:18,160 Speaker 1: Was like, because that's because that's literal. 847 00:37:18,760 --> 00:37:21,719 Speaker 3: If you get what if you get that that many years, Yeah, 848 00:37:21,760 --> 00:37:23,640 Speaker 3: that's that's more than I got with my dad. 849 00:37:23,960 --> 00:37:25,759 Speaker 1: I think about that too. I do think in the 850 00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:27,640 Speaker 1: bath of Brinn and I'm like, don't want her to 851 00:37:28,160 --> 00:37:30,360 Speaker 1: know how to add. I mean, she's in she I 852 00:37:30,400 --> 00:37:32,480 Speaker 1: think she knows how she's thirteen. I think she can 853 00:37:32,480 --> 00:37:35,160 Speaker 1: add those numbers, but I hope she doesn't scramble it up. 854 00:37:35,080 --> 00:37:37,560 Speaker 2: Because she asks you about your age, and she. 855 00:37:37,320 --> 00:37:39,400 Speaker 1: She makes the connection. I watched her make the connection 856 00:37:39,600 --> 00:37:41,800 Speaker 1: and then I watch her get distracted because it's anxiety 857 00:37:41,800 --> 00:37:45,239 Speaker 1: for her. We're very close. It really does get so 858 00:37:45,360 --> 00:37:47,560 Speaker 1: much nicer. I mean, it's it just keeps getting better. 859 00:37:47,600 --> 00:37:51,680 Speaker 1: It's so beautiful. They become. People will say you're not 860 00:37:51,719 --> 00:37:55,480 Speaker 1: you're not their best friend. I am. She we're best friends, 861 00:37:55,520 --> 00:37:58,279 Speaker 1: and I'm also a strict indulgent parent. But yeah, we 862 00:37:58,400 --> 00:38:01,239 Speaker 1: definitely definitely are really really do talk to I will 863 00:38:01,280 --> 00:38:04,080 Speaker 1: say one thing, I notice that in talking to you 864 00:38:04,080 --> 00:38:07,000 Speaker 1: about being present, we could be talking and she could 865 00:38:07,040 --> 00:38:09,200 Speaker 1: come home and we could talk. If we're really really 866 00:38:09,280 --> 00:38:11,160 Speaker 1: quiet and go out to dinner or something and there's 867 00:38:11,200 --> 00:38:14,320 Speaker 1: no there are no phones above, she'll really tell me everything. 868 00:38:14,520 --> 00:38:16,840 Speaker 1: It's it's very different or laying TV. It's got to 869 00:38:16,840 --> 00:38:18,640 Speaker 1: be very relaxed. It's never when you want them to 870 00:38:18,680 --> 00:38:20,359 Speaker 1: talk or when you're sitting down to talk because you're 871 00:38:20,360 --> 00:38:23,200 Speaker 1: trying to be a proactive parent, and it really just 872 00:38:23,239 --> 00:38:26,280 Speaker 1: like comes in when nothing's going on. They'll just say 873 00:38:26,600 --> 00:38:28,640 Speaker 1: this made me feel really bad when this happened, or 874 00:38:28,680 --> 00:38:30,719 Speaker 1: I'm having in trouble with this person. And a lot 875 00:38:30,760 --> 00:38:33,239 Speaker 1: of crazy stuff does happen at school and they don't 876 00:38:33,280 --> 00:38:35,600 Speaker 1: even realize it's happening. They know it, but they're stifling 877 00:38:35,600 --> 00:38:38,080 Speaker 1: because they're not in touch with their emotions. So I 878 00:38:38,120 --> 00:38:41,200 Speaker 1: would say the only thing that I really really have 879 00:38:41,360 --> 00:38:43,960 Speaker 1: learned is that you have to really be quiet, no 880 00:38:44,080 --> 00:38:47,320 Speaker 1: devices and just like allow the wine to breathe, because 881 00:38:47,719 --> 00:38:48,640 Speaker 1: everything comes out. 882 00:39:00,880 --> 00:39:01,680 Speaker 2: What's your device? 883 00:39:02,120 --> 00:39:02,359 Speaker 1: Rule? 884 00:39:02,520 --> 00:39:03,640 Speaker 2: Like what do you have When it comes to. 885 00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:07,239 Speaker 1: With her, she's not she's an artist. She's not that 886 00:39:07,360 --> 00:39:09,560 Speaker 1: into it. Sometimes she'll just do it if we're in 887 00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:11,120 Speaker 1: the car and they'll see her. If it's after a 888 00:39:11,120 --> 00:39:13,279 Speaker 1: certain bed time where feels like you're eating cheetos just 889 00:39:13,280 --> 00:39:15,640 Speaker 1: to eat them. You're bringing cheetos like you're not even 890 00:39:15,719 --> 00:39:18,279 Speaker 1: enjoying them anymore, just like downing the back, I'll be like, 891 00:39:18,320 --> 00:39:20,879 Speaker 1: it's no off off. Yeah, but she's not. 892 00:39:21,120 --> 00:39:21,839 Speaker 2: That's not that kid. 893 00:39:21,880 --> 00:39:23,600 Speaker 1: No, she's not at tables with it, or she never was, 894 00:39:23,640 --> 00:39:25,640 Speaker 1: because when she was really little, I was not about 895 00:39:25,640 --> 00:39:27,440 Speaker 1: the TV. I tried. I woke up like with the 896 00:39:27,440 --> 00:39:29,360 Speaker 1: toothpicks and the eyeballs and was like, oh god, I 897 00:39:29,400 --> 00:39:32,000 Speaker 1: gotta be that parent. But yeah, I think it's really 898 00:39:32,040 --> 00:39:33,960 Speaker 1: I do think it's toxic. It's toxic to us. 899 00:39:34,080 --> 00:39:35,480 Speaker 2: I know it's terrible. It's gross. 900 00:39:35,680 --> 00:39:37,440 Speaker 3: Yeah, we were talking about a lot of people are 901 00:39:37,480 --> 00:39:39,439 Speaker 3: doing that wait till eighth or wait till ninth grade, 902 00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:40,880 Speaker 3: or wait till high school to get a phone, and 903 00:39:40,960 --> 00:39:43,399 Speaker 3: some people are doing the why don't we just all 904 00:39:43,400 --> 00:39:45,520 Speaker 3: give the kids flip phones just so they have a 905 00:39:45,520 --> 00:39:46,320 Speaker 3: way to communicate. 906 00:39:46,360 --> 00:39:47,440 Speaker 2: But they are not hard. 907 00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:49,320 Speaker 1: I'm not. I can't say that I'm good or I 908 00:39:49,400 --> 00:39:51,560 Speaker 1: winning any awards at that. But she's not that into 909 00:39:51,600 --> 00:39:54,040 Speaker 1: it I have. It's my own relationship. 910 00:39:53,520 --> 00:39:54,320 Speaker 2: With it that's toxic. 911 00:39:54,520 --> 00:39:54,800 Speaker 1: It. 912 00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:55,440 Speaker 2: It's like gross. 913 00:39:55,480 --> 00:39:57,560 Speaker 1: I think it's gross, and I'm gross and I want 914 00:39:57,600 --> 00:39:59,520 Speaker 1: to beat myself up but I'm gross, but it just 915 00:39:59,560 --> 00:40:02,520 Speaker 1: makes me. It's gross the whole thing. It changed. It's gross, 916 00:40:03,280 --> 00:40:05,120 Speaker 1: all right. So the last well not the last question. 917 00:40:05,160 --> 00:40:06,600 Speaker 1: I could stay with you forever, but you have to 918 00:40:06,640 --> 00:40:10,600 Speaker 1: live a life is so what do you think about 919 00:40:10,600 --> 00:40:12,960 Speaker 1: your work dynamic? Like do you think do you think 920 00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:15,719 Speaker 1: about your age and people that are coming up underneath you? 921 00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:18,480 Speaker 1: Are you do you still have that competitive thought or like, 922 00:40:18,520 --> 00:40:20,960 Speaker 1: oh are they more interesting? Or do you think about that? 923 00:40:21,600 --> 00:40:25,120 Speaker 3: I weirdly, in my career, I don't. That's not been 924 00:40:25,239 --> 00:40:28,480 Speaker 3: my thing. Like I was always the one who like 925 00:40:28,960 --> 00:40:30,560 Speaker 3: the little engine that could, Like I was going to 926 00:40:30,600 --> 00:40:32,840 Speaker 3: outwork you. I might not be as bright, or as pretty, 927 00:40:32,960 --> 00:40:35,000 Speaker 3: or as smart or all those things, but I'll. 928 00:40:34,840 --> 00:40:36,359 Speaker 2: Still be here. I'll be the one. 929 00:40:36,400 --> 00:40:39,320 Speaker 3: Because when I played high school basketball, I would until 930 00:40:39,320 --> 00:40:40,320 Speaker 3: the buzzer sounded. 931 00:40:40,400 --> 00:40:41,480 Speaker 2: I believed we could win. 932 00:40:41,600 --> 00:40:43,759 Speaker 3: I used to I used to cry after games because 933 00:40:43,760 --> 00:40:46,680 Speaker 3: I would give every single ounce. And I'm a believer, 934 00:40:46,960 --> 00:40:47,879 Speaker 3: like miracles happen. 935 00:40:47,920 --> 00:40:48,680 Speaker 2: I've watched it. 936 00:40:48,840 --> 00:40:50,680 Speaker 3: I mean, I mean, you know, I hit the foul 937 00:40:50,760 --> 00:40:52,400 Speaker 3: shot when no one thought I would would do it. 938 00:40:52,680 --> 00:40:55,400 Speaker 3: So I believe that I can. I can make it 939 00:40:55,440 --> 00:40:58,239 Speaker 3: and I can make something happen. But the weird thing 940 00:40:58,239 --> 00:41:02,520 Speaker 3: about our industry are industry is it's like, look at 941 00:41:02,520 --> 00:41:04,280 Speaker 3: the women driving the buses. 942 00:41:04,480 --> 00:41:04,680 Speaker 2: Man. 943 00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:08,680 Speaker 1: Young women need someone to inspire them. I think more 944 00:41:08,719 --> 00:41:11,120 Speaker 1: than ever now, there's so much going on and you can. 945 00:41:11,239 --> 00:41:13,719 Speaker 1: You know, it's funny that you say that because I've 946 00:41:13,800 --> 00:41:16,160 Speaker 1: found this crazy thing that we keep joking about. The 947 00:41:16,160 --> 00:41:18,839 Speaker 1: TikTok think it's for baby. They're children, but they need 948 00:41:18,840 --> 00:41:21,319 Speaker 1: a wacky, crazy ant. You know what I'm saying, Like 949 00:41:21,360 --> 00:41:24,040 Speaker 1: you can find your place in this whole thing you're 950 00:41:24,120 --> 00:41:26,960 Speaker 1: covering Afghanistan. I'm wacky, crazy ant going in pajamas, but 951 00:41:26,960 --> 00:41:29,040 Speaker 1: we all have our place in society. No, you know 952 00:41:29,040 --> 00:41:30,520 Speaker 1: what I'm saying. Though, If you like that, it makes 953 00:41:30,560 --> 00:41:33,160 Speaker 1: you feel free and you just don't care anymore. 954 00:41:33,400 --> 00:41:33,759 Speaker 2: I don't. 955 00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:35,839 Speaker 3: And I also feel like there's a freedom that has 956 00:41:35,880 --> 00:41:39,319 Speaker 3: come to me, not just professionally but personally. And I 957 00:41:39,360 --> 00:41:43,080 Speaker 3: think finding your purpose and being able to say out 958 00:41:43,120 --> 00:41:45,919 Speaker 3: loud things that you were scared to say out loud 959 00:41:46,040 --> 00:41:49,560 Speaker 3: when you were younger and to realize, like you get 960 00:41:49,600 --> 00:41:52,360 Speaker 3: one go at it, man, it's gonna be when you 961 00:41:52,360 --> 00:41:54,120 Speaker 3: said you're in the box, like you get one ride 962 00:41:54,120 --> 00:41:54,719 Speaker 3: around the sun? 963 00:41:55,360 --> 00:41:57,799 Speaker 2: Like do you? I agree? And I feel like. 964 00:41:57,840 --> 00:42:01,200 Speaker 3: It's time to be purposeful also, and you know, in 965 00:42:01,320 --> 00:42:04,440 Speaker 3: the charity part of life and in the party, I 966 00:42:04,480 --> 00:42:05,960 Speaker 3: get a bit which I'm going to come back and 967 00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:06,600 Speaker 3: share it with you. 968 00:42:06,680 --> 00:42:07,799 Speaker 1: I know we're not going to talk about it now. 969 00:42:07,840 --> 00:42:09,439 Speaker 1: But the last thing is will you do you care? 970 00:42:09,880 --> 00:42:12,160 Speaker 1: How do I say this properly? Do you? Is it 971 00:42:12,200 --> 00:42:15,000 Speaker 1: important to you to be in a relationship with a 972 00:42:15,520 --> 00:42:16,120 Speaker 1: man now? 973 00:42:16,239 --> 00:42:16,759 Speaker 2: Like is it? 974 00:42:17,080 --> 00:42:19,719 Speaker 1: Is it just if it happens it's additive or do 975 00:42:19,800 --> 00:42:21,640 Speaker 1: you proactively put it out there because you want it 976 00:42:21,680 --> 00:42:23,080 Speaker 1: in the universe or not right now? 977 00:42:23,680 --> 00:42:28,600 Speaker 3: Sometimes I have a vision which is and I picture 978 00:42:28,680 --> 00:42:31,080 Speaker 3: this road that I'm on and it's lush and beautiful 979 00:42:31,520 --> 00:42:34,960 Speaker 3: and it's filled with like streams and mountains and pretty everything. 980 00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:35,520 Speaker 2: You know. 981 00:42:35,600 --> 00:42:38,160 Speaker 3: It's like you know, like sometimes you're on a craggy 982 00:42:38,239 --> 00:42:41,480 Speaker 3: road with potholes and it's kind of dusty, and you're like, 983 00:42:41,480 --> 00:42:42,799 Speaker 3: I don't want to go down this way. I want 984 00:42:42,800 --> 00:42:44,120 Speaker 3: to go back and when you're on the right road, 985 00:42:44,160 --> 00:42:46,239 Speaker 3: you feel it. You're like, oh, this is good. I 986 00:42:46,280 --> 00:42:49,920 Speaker 3: picture my kids and sometimes I have a vision of 987 00:42:49,960 --> 00:42:52,880 Speaker 3: a man walking with us, like and I kind of 988 00:42:53,040 --> 00:42:55,040 Speaker 3: like the other day I saw it and was clear, 989 00:42:55,080 --> 00:42:57,920 Speaker 3: and this was the road that I imagine my life, 990 00:42:57,960 --> 00:43:00,640 Speaker 3: Like you know, when you're living your life right, this 991 00:43:00,840 --> 00:43:01,439 Speaker 3: is your road. 992 00:43:01,920 --> 00:43:03,200 Speaker 2: Like I'm on it right now. 993 00:43:03,200 --> 00:43:06,359 Speaker 3: I know I'm on the road, and sometimes I can 994 00:43:06,400 --> 00:43:09,600 Speaker 3: see it and sometimes I can't. But I'm you know, well, 995 00:43:09,600 --> 00:43:11,480 Speaker 3: like have I gone on on a couple of days, sure, 996 00:43:11,600 --> 00:43:15,480 Speaker 3: but you're I'm open, of course, because look, your heart's 997 00:43:15,480 --> 00:43:18,560 Speaker 3: ability to expand is beyond measure and why limit it 998 00:43:18,600 --> 00:43:21,080 Speaker 3: because that one was this one or that didn't work. 999 00:43:21,120 --> 00:43:23,759 Speaker 3: It doesn't like your I just feel like there's so 1000 00:43:23,960 --> 00:43:27,800 Speaker 3: much in there. It is, it's immeasurable. You could have 1001 00:43:27,840 --> 00:43:30,920 Speaker 3: another kid, you could have another puppy, you could have 1002 00:43:30,960 --> 00:43:34,000 Speaker 3: another I like, there's room for more. 1003 00:43:34,520 --> 00:43:36,719 Speaker 1: So I do keep it open, and you're allowing for 1004 00:43:36,800 --> 00:43:39,840 Speaker 1: either like either as either as interesting. I love it. 1005 00:43:39,960 --> 00:43:43,480 Speaker 2: I love you, I love you, Love you. Bethany