WEBVTT - Episode 5: Breaking Out 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:13.320 Yeah, this is life being grounded. Wake up, take my meds, 0:00:13.560 --> 0:00:16.200 go to school. Janelle and I put our heads together 0:00:16.239 --> 0:00:20.160 over lunch, come straight home from school, do homework, catch 0:00:20.280 --> 0:00:23.520 up with Marco over my laptop, take my meds, and 0:00:23.600 --> 0:00:28.440 go to sleep. Complete routine. Oh yeah, and meditating for 0:00:28.480 --> 0:00:30.200 a few minutes when I can manage to keep my 0:00:30.280 --> 0:00:32.920 fury at my parents from clouding up my whole damn head. 0:00:34.360 --> 0:00:36.920 One weekend and it's been awful for my mental health, 0:00:37.680 --> 0:00:39.640 even when I do sit to clear my mind. The 0:00:39.720 --> 0:00:42.760 number of wild thoughts, fears of the pod following apart 0:00:42.800 --> 0:00:44.720 because I can't be there to give my full effort, 0:00:44.960 --> 0:00:47.320 anxieties about Marco and Janelle hitting it off while I'm 0:00:47.400 --> 0:00:51.440 under lockdown, embarrassment that I am on freaking punishment when 0:00:51.479 --> 0:00:55.800 I'm practically an adult man. This is too much. It's 0:00:55.800 --> 0:01:05.360 a constant distraction. All of this makes me appreciate my 0:01:05.400 --> 0:01:08.360 new school even more. Janelle and I can make progress 0:01:08.400 --> 0:01:10.880 on the pot from there, and I don't feel like 0:01:10.880 --> 0:01:13.120 an outsider like I do at home with my parents. 0:01:13.920 --> 0:01:16.880 Janelle is promoting the podcast around school, even as some 0:01:16.959 --> 0:01:20.440 of the other students recognizing me as mask on coming 0:01:20.520 --> 0:01:22.679 up to me at my locker and telling me how 0:01:22.720 --> 0:01:28.360 the Jedi am. He's strange having local celebrity studies. I 0:01:28.360 --> 0:01:31.880 could get used to. Did Marco tell you he's getting 0:01:31.920 --> 0:01:34.840 swagged from potential advertisers? Now what do you get? He 0:01:34.959 --> 0:01:38.040 got a new mattress, green tea centered That kid is 0:01:38.080 --> 0:01:41.120 too much. I mean you said it, not me. But 0:01:41.200 --> 0:01:42.760 I want to look into the company, you know, make 0:01:42.800 --> 0:01:45.959 sure they're sustainable. You have to vet these brands. What's 0:01:45.959 --> 0:01:48.640 their mission? Do they believe in black lives matters? You 0:01:48.760 --> 0:01:51.920 always thinking two steps ahead? How much longer are in lockdown? 0:01:52.400 --> 0:01:55.600 Not that zoom. Production meetings aren't fun. Another week, Wow, 0:01:55.960 --> 0:02:00.280 your parents don't play well. You're almost the air MG listen, 0:02:00.480 --> 0:02:02.760 you'll see it when you get home. But we got 0:02:02.760 --> 0:02:05.080 a very interesting invite in the d MS for the 0:02:05.160 --> 0:02:08.520 official podcast instead account. Oh really, what's the invite? Another 0:02:08.560 --> 0:02:12.480 interview request? Not exactly No, you, me and Marco can 0:02:12.560 --> 0:02:14.600 discuss it on our next production call. I just wanted 0:02:14.639 --> 0:02:19.480 to give your heads out. My parents took my phone 0:02:19.520 --> 0:02:22.080 for the week's sort of suspense is killing me? What 0:02:22.240 --> 0:02:24.840 is this girl talking about? I rushed home with the 0:02:24.919 --> 0:02:27.239 fresh burst of energy, just wanting to get to my 0:02:27.320 --> 0:02:31.640 laptop and see what invice she means. I'm home before 0:02:31.680 --> 0:02:33.680 mom and Dad. So I rushed up the stairs and 0:02:33.760 --> 0:02:35.520 dropped my book bag on the floor of my room. 0:02:35.520 --> 0:02:37.280 As I pulled into my office chair and turned on 0:02:37.320 --> 0:02:39.760 my laptop, I signed it to our here comes to 0:02:39.800 --> 0:02:43.880 break instant and scroll through today's new d MS. Sure enough, 0:02:44.480 --> 0:03:14.519 there it is a message from viral Villa. H m M. 0:03:17.800 --> 0:03:20.480 I hear my parents get home. Embrace myself to go 0:03:20.520 --> 0:03:23.519 downstairs and greet them. My mind is lit up from 0:03:23.520 --> 0:03:27.079 this d M. Viral Villa is next level. It's the 0:03:27.120 --> 0:03:28.959 house south in l A that's rented by a bunch 0:03:28.960 --> 0:03:33.440 of content creators. They work together and then artistic collective, 0:03:33.600 --> 0:03:37.240 making YouTube clips and TikTok's and answer stories in their backyard. 0:03:38.880 --> 0:03:45.000 And they parted. And I've got an invite. No wait, 0:03:45.280 --> 0:03:49.760 we've got an invite me, Marco and Janelle. The invite 0:03:49.760 --> 0:03:52.200 from the viral Villa founders is intended for one person, 0:03:52.680 --> 0:03:57.400 mask on, and that's me. But really this podcast is 0:03:57.440 --> 0:04:02.280 a three person operation, and I still grounded. This is 0:04:02.320 --> 0:04:06.160 going to be an impossible cell to my parents. I 0:04:06.200 --> 0:04:09.480 can't imagine turning this down. But how can I get 0:04:09.520 --> 0:04:13.040 them on board, I opened the door and run back 0:04:13.040 --> 0:04:20.400 down the stairs. Well, wow, look who suddenly eager to 0:04:20.400 --> 0:04:23.320 show his face. Any other time this past week and 0:04:23.440 --> 0:04:25.799 his attempt at dad humor would have piss me off, 0:04:26.240 --> 0:04:30.440 throw me off balance, But the viral Villa invite got 0:04:30.440 --> 0:04:33.920 me on cloud nine. It's actually amazing how much here 0:04:33.960 --> 0:04:36.880 comes to break. Its help with my anxiety attacks. I'm 0:04:36.920 --> 0:04:40.480 not nervous, I'm anxious in a good way. It builds 0:04:40.480 --> 0:04:45.160 my confidence and helps me remain present. Hem if this 0:04:45.960 --> 0:04:48.520 something I have to ask you what is it? It's 0:04:48.520 --> 0:04:51.320 gonna be awkward and just spill it. I know that 0:04:51.320 --> 0:04:53.000 I'm still grounding for a week, But I got an 0:04:53.000 --> 0:04:54.960 invite to go away this weekend to me the whole 0:04:54.960 --> 0:04:58.040 bunch of other artists and content creators. It would be 0:04:58.080 --> 0:05:02.320 a huge opportunity from for the podcast. Okay, what is 0:05:02.360 --> 0:05:06.080 this place? Well, there's a place out west called viral Villa. 0:05:06.839 --> 0:05:10.120 It's in l A. All the hottest influences and constant 0:05:10.120 --> 0:05:14.560 creators go out there for long weekends just to create. 0:05:15.560 --> 0:05:19.640 And they've invited me because of the podcast. They want 0:05:19.680 --> 0:05:22.240 me to come out this weekend. Some YouTuber couldn't make it, 0:05:22.279 --> 0:05:33.239 and they have a bed open. I gotta go Los Angeles. Boy, 0:05:33.279 --> 0:05:38.719 are you kidding me? L A Jesus be offense. Let 0:05:38.720 --> 0:05:41.320 me get this correct. You want us to lift your 0:05:41.360 --> 0:05:45.000 grounding so you can go fly across the country to 0:05:45.120 --> 0:05:48.960 party with people we don't even know. Honey, you better 0:05:49.000 --> 0:05:53.000 get your son. For one fleeting second, I thought they 0:05:53.080 --> 0:05:55.960 might show mercy for my honesty, or at least ask 0:05:56.000 --> 0:06:00.680 more questions about it. But nope, they just won't let up. Brubon. 0:06:01.320 --> 0:06:06.000 Now you're still grounded. I can see a look of 0:06:06.040 --> 0:06:09.320 sympathy flash across my mother's face. Well, she keeps up 0:06:09.320 --> 0:06:13.760 the United Front with dead I don't understand. This is 0:06:13.760 --> 0:06:17.000 a huge opportunity. This is my future on the line, 0:06:17.240 --> 0:06:20.520 not just the hobby or a project. I can meet 0:06:20.520 --> 0:06:22.679 other young people working in the same space as Marco, 0:06:22.760 --> 0:06:25.440 Janelle and I. We can really blow up each more 0:06:25.440 --> 0:06:28.960 on other social platforms. I'm gonna take this podcast to 0:06:29.000 --> 0:06:32.839 the next level by any means necessary. I'll be focused. 0:06:33.520 --> 0:06:36.640 I promise, I'm not just going out there the party. 0:06:36.680 --> 0:06:39.680 You aren't going out there at all. You've been lying 0:06:39.880 --> 0:06:42.400 to us all along, and we find this out a 0:06:42.440 --> 0:06:45.839 week ago. You know this is a wild ask. You're 0:06:45.880 --> 0:06:49.480 grounded and it's not gonna happen. Do you hear me? 0:06:50.080 --> 0:06:55.440 Tell me? You hear me? I hear all. My usual 0:06:55.520 --> 0:06:58.479 nerves are on fire with anger, but I'm not going 0:06:58.560 --> 0:07:01.640 to blow up at on this time. I get it. 0:07:02.080 --> 0:07:06.640 I admitted the truth. I was wrong. Damn, this is 0:07:06.680 --> 0:07:12.880 my future. Parents just don't understand. This isn't over. I'm 0:07:12.920 --> 0:07:17.280 good with dinner. I'll just start. Plus, I have a 0:07:17.400 --> 0:07:20.440 lot to catch up. A sorry. I can see the 0:07:20.480 --> 0:07:23.360 look at disappointment in their eyes, but I can't have 0:07:23.360 --> 0:07:25.560 a seat at their dinner table pretending that I'm okay 0:07:25.600 --> 0:07:28.800 just so that they could feel good. Nah, I'm fed 0:07:28.880 --> 0:07:31.800 up playing their well behaved in perfect sun. Let me 0:07:31.840 --> 0:07:34.440 go back to my space to figure out my next steps. 0:07:37.120 --> 0:07:39.679 As soon as I'm back in my room, I can't 0:07:39.680 --> 0:07:42.360 help but get Piste off even more. If I had 0:07:42.400 --> 0:07:44.640 told them up in front about the podcast, or they 0:07:44.640 --> 0:07:48.000 have supported me, they're playing like they would, but I 0:07:48.160 --> 0:07:54.680 seriously doubt that the truth the soul technophobic. Maybe if 0:07:54.680 --> 0:07:57.000 they thought it was just a little project, which is 0:07:57.000 --> 0:08:01.320 how we started, I should have just told them. But 0:08:01.400 --> 0:08:04.480 they must know they cannot punish me like this much longer. 0:08:05.360 --> 0:08:08.760 Why not work with me? Instead of against me. All 0:08:08.800 --> 0:08:10.840 the things I wanted to express them downstairs, I let 0:08:10.840 --> 0:08:17.720 out through my bluetooth speakers. I'm bracing myself to do 0:08:17.800 --> 0:08:21.600 the unthinkable to go out to Viral Villa without their permission. 0:08:21.760 --> 0:08:25.080 This would be a huge breach of trust. I know 0:08:25.120 --> 0:08:27.280 they'll be mad as hell, and it would be fair 0:08:27.280 --> 0:08:31.160 for them to be pissed. But despite it all, I 0:08:31.240 --> 0:08:33.480 just know that I have to take a stand for myself. 0:08:33.520 --> 0:08:35.800 That it would be insane not to go out there. 0:08:36.960 --> 0:08:39.199 If they aren't going to help me build this career track, 0:08:40.040 --> 0:08:42.679 I'm gonna have to build it myself. Even if they 0:08:42.720 --> 0:08:45.840 decided to withhold my college money send me to restrict 0:08:45.840 --> 0:08:48.520 the school away from Janelle and my growing repid book 0:08:48.520 --> 0:08:53.040 of t Yeah, that would suck. But whatever their reaction, 0:08:53.920 --> 0:08:56.079 I gotta do what I gotta do for me in 0:08:56.240 --> 0:08:59.240 my life. I get back to thinking about next steps. 0:09:00.120 --> 0:09:02.760 Marco and Janelle know about the invite, and they're waiting 0:09:02.800 --> 0:09:05.000 on me at our next production meeting to figure out 0:09:05.040 --> 0:09:07.719 how to respond to it. That meeting is supposed to 0:09:07.760 --> 0:09:10.640 be tonight. I've got to get them on board of 0:09:10.679 --> 0:09:13.120 flying out West, but I don't think that should be 0:09:13.160 --> 0:09:16.680 too hard. Once that's done. I can afford to turn 0:09:16.720 --> 0:09:19.640 my thoughts back to my parents. I can't even ask 0:09:19.720 --> 0:09:22.640 Janelle Marcus advice on how I should approach it once 0:09:22.720 --> 0:09:25.640 Marco and janelleare on board, or apply to the villa's 0:09:25.679 --> 0:09:28.440 message that I'm flying out and book my tickets and 0:09:28.480 --> 0:09:30.520 I gotta schedule flights for midday so I can fake 0:09:30.559 --> 0:09:32.800 going to school and then dunk out for the airport. 0:09:33.480 --> 0:09:35.320 I'll only have a couple of nights out west before 0:09:35.320 --> 0:09:37.520 I have to come back and face the music. But 0:09:37.640 --> 0:09:39.960 they don't make a statement and may be about to 0:09:39.960 --> 0:09:42.760 make the biggest mistake of my life. But here comes 0:09:42.800 --> 0:09:52.520 to jailbreak for real? I want my first question is 0:09:52.920 --> 0:09:55.600 in an industry that is constantly trying to define artists 0:09:55.880 --> 0:09:58.319 in your own words, tell our listeners who is l 0:09:58.360 --> 0:10:01.280 ab to go la to There is an artist from Tampa, 0:10:01.320 --> 0:10:04.080 Florida and not just a rapper like an artist because 0:10:04.080 --> 0:10:06.360 I make all types of music depend on how I'm feeling. 0:10:07.160 --> 0:10:09.120 You know, I'm just a simple person. I like the 0:10:09.200 --> 0:10:12.280 simple things. I'm just like a cool, chill person. You know, 0:10:12.320 --> 0:10:14.360 when I think of Florida, I don't think of Tampa 0:10:14.400 --> 0:10:16.959 as far as like artists is concerned. I love that 0:10:17.040 --> 0:10:19.480 all artists out there, but my mind goes first to 0:10:20.160 --> 0:10:23.000 say Mayanna. To talk about what the music scene is 0:10:23.040 --> 0:10:25.559 like in Tampa. It's kind of like a love hate relationship, 0:10:25.880 --> 0:10:29.160 you know how So it's kind of like a love 0:10:29.200 --> 0:10:32.520 hate relationship. If you ask ten different rappers, you're gonna 0:10:32.520 --> 0:10:35.000 get ten different answers here in Tampa because you know, 0:10:35.320 --> 0:10:38.560 certain people on on different levels to other people, so 0:10:38.600 --> 0:10:41.959 they feel like they vertising and stuff like that. When 0:10:41.960 --> 0:10:44.760 you build your fan base to what they like from you, 0:10:45.960 --> 0:10:49.000 that makes the fans. So, I mean, we don't really 0:10:49.000 --> 0:10:51.680 have a specific sound right now, but we got a 0:10:51.679 --> 0:10:54.440 few artists that signed, and we got a few artists 0:10:54.520 --> 0:10:57.800 doing anything majorly too, so you know, yeah, like listening 0:10:57.800 --> 0:11:00.600 to their music and and on shop back and like 0:11:01.320 --> 0:11:04.640 Rick Ross has his own sound. Acehood who's from Florida too, 0:11:04.720 --> 0:11:07.680 has his own sound trick Daddy. So that's interesting that 0:11:07.720 --> 0:11:11.120 you said that bigger picture. Can you talk about being 0:11:11.160 --> 0:11:13.599 signed to a major label and how is that transition? 0:11:14.400 --> 0:11:16.240 What was that transition like for you? I mean it 0:11:16.360 --> 0:11:18.280 was pretty easy because I always kind of like care 0:11:18.320 --> 0:11:23.080 of myself, like I was important anyway before I was signed. 0:11:23.120 --> 0:11:27.440 So it's like it's just like a label. Now I'm 0:11:27.480 --> 0:11:30.000 actually signed, so you know, I have a reason not 0:11:30.080 --> 0:11:32.120 to go to the club all the time and stuff. 0:11:32.880 --> 0:11:37.480 Help me save more money. Run. How did you develop 0:11:37.520 --> 0:11:41.880 your fan base Instagram? Instagram? Instagram is the most amazing 0:11:41.960 --> 0:11:46.720 thing that guy ever? Crazy. Do you feel like you're 0:11:46.720 --> 0:11:49.400 connected to your fans that way? Do you recomments? Do 0:11:49.480 --> 0:11:52.160 you respond back to comments? Oh? Yeah, I clapped back 0:11:52.360 --> 0:11:54.360 on the regular, Like if you say something to me, 0:11:54.440 --> 0:11:57.400 I'm a screenshot, go on your page, get one of 0:11:57.440 --> 0:11:59.600 your ugly pictures and post it so the world can 0:11:59.600 --> 0:12:01.679 see that is the person I was talking about me. 0:12:02.480 --> 0:12:04.600 So you're Penny you out here? Hum, I'm not that 0:12:04.640 --> 0:12:07.600 out of touch yet. Courts Drake wouldn't comment back because 0:12:07.600 --> 0:12:11.040 it's three comments, but I only have like forty, so 0:12:11.080 --> 0:12:14.440 it's like, I'm gonna see you talking ship cool cool cool. 0:12:14.520 --> 0:12:17.480 So what advice would you give young artists on staying 0:12:17.520 --> 0:12:20.319 true to themselves and also being open to the process 0:12:20.360 --> 0:12:22.720 of growth and evolving. It's just gonna take a little longer, 0:12:23.600 --> 0:12:26.640 that's it. It's more organic when you be yourself when 0:12:26.640 --> 0:12:29.120 you try to like follow everybody else and make it 0:12:29.200 --> 0:12:31.679 kind of harder because you sound like everything else out there, 0:12:31.760 --> 0:12:34.160 so nobody wants to just keep hearing the same thing. 0:12:34.679 --> 0:12:36.640 And what do you want your legacy to be? Everybody 0:12:36.640 --> 0:12:38.480 asked me that question, but it's like, I ain't really 0:12:38.520 --> 0:12:40.480 living fun, no legacy. I'm just trying to get like, 0:12:40.640 --> 0:12:43.439 really really rich, and I love doing music, so it's 0:12:43.440 --> 0:12:47.320 like that's a plus. How are you going to keep 0:12:47.320 --> 0:12:50.760 the wealth? We see artists like Jeezy Young jeezs in 0:12:50.800 --> 0:12:54.520 the real estate. Are there any other business mensures outside 0:12:54.559 --> 0:12:56.880 of music that you're interested in pursuing to maintain that well, 0:12:57.480 --> 0:12:59.800 getting the owner like my own clothing line and stuff like, 0:13:00.520 --> 0:13:03.440 and of course real estate. You know, it's Florida in 0:13:03.480 --> 0:13:15.800 Florida's span every day. So we'll be right back and 0:13:15.880 --> 0:13:24.440 now back to the show. Okay, so we've all listened 0:13:24.480 --> 0:13:27.720 to the final mix on episode five. Everything good that 0:13:27.800 --> 0:13:31.280 all the go. Interview turned out great. Thanks, but remember 0:13:31.320 --> 0:13:32.720 that was all you were getting in at the show. 0:13:32.760 --> 0:13:35.679 You now mixes all good by me. We're on our 0:13:35.679 --> 0:13:38.439 production car now and I'm squirming to get to the 0:13:38.520 --> 0:13:44.320 viral villa business. Let's talk viral villa. Holy sh it? 0:13:44.360 --> 0:13:47.480 Am I right? Guys? How about sums it up? What 0:13:47.480 --> 0:13:49.280 do we do. I think we should take them up 0:13:49.320 --> 0:13:51.720 on it. I want to go. We all want to go, 0:13:51.880 --> 0:13:55.240 Ruben or what about your parents? Aren't you grounded? Let 0:13:55.280 --> 0:13:58.000 me worry about that. We can't just let this chance 0:13:58.040 --> 0:14:00.559 pass us by. That's not what we're saying. Bro Bruin, 0:14:00.800 --> 0:14:02.320 what do you think of Marco going out there in 0:14:02.360 --> 0:14:06.680 your place? Damn? I thought Janette would be down with 0:14:06.720 --> 0:14:09.440 the idea of me flying out to l A. Marco 0:14:09.520 --> 0:14:11.400 and Janet was supposed to be on board for this, 0:14:12.720 --> 0:14:15.719 but they are linking up, getting cozy and planning things 0:14:15.800 --> 0:14:19.320 without me being grounded. His cost to me, my life, 0:14:19.360 --> 0:14:23.400 and possibly my friends. It's a terrible feeling. This is 0:14:23.440 --> 0:14:26.960 the opposite of the plan. At the same time, I 0:14:27.040 --> 0:14:31.160 can't argue with the logic. I see it immediately. Marco 0:14:31.200 --> 0:14:33.840 already has a huge following under his own name, his 0:14:33.920 --> 0:14:36.760 parents would go along with it, and he co founded 0:14:36.800 --> 0:14:40.840 the pie. But the message specifically said they wanted to 0:14:40.880 --> 0:14:45.240 invite mask on and that's me. I know that I'm 0:14:45.280 --> 0:14:49.840 fixated on this, but being grounded is driving me in safe. 0:14:51.040 --> 0:14:54.600 I feel like God has given me another shot since 0:14:54.640 --> 0:14:56.480 my parents pulled the plug on me. Going viral and 0:14:56.640 --> 0:15:00.080 vibe and it is my calling to take this. I 0:15:00.200 --> 0:15:04.600 know that I'm being selfish. I can't help you. I 0:15:04.760 --> 0:15:07.400 really don't want Marco to go without me. I don't 0:15:07.440 --> 0:15:10.360 want my parents or anyone else scrolling this up. I 0:15:10.400 --> 0:15:13.720 don't know. They asked the mask on. Yeah, but mask 0:15:13.800 --> 0:15:16.360 On hides behind a vocal distortion. It could be any 0:15:16.360 --> 0:15:20.520 of us. It's not though, it's men. If you're not 0:15:20.600 --> 0:15:22.200 cool with it, we can always tell them we can't 0:15:22.200 --> 0:15:23.840 make it on such short notice, but we'd love to 0:15:23.840 --> 0:15:27.280 get there another time. No, this may be my only chance, 0:15:27.520 --> 0:15:31.360 our only chance, or you're only rebon. Why don't you 0:15:31.360 --> 0:15:34.320 tell us why you're really made? I'm not cool with 0:15:34.400 --> 0:15:37.480 its bit. I knew it. You were the one who 0:15:37.480 --> 0:15:39.480 wanted to disguise your voice and hide your name. Now 0:15:39.520 --> 0:15:42.800 you want all the credit. I can't lie. What do 0:15:42.800 --> 0:15:45.400 you want me to do? This podcast means a lot 0:15:45.440 --> 0:15:49.160 to me. I work for this opportunity too. You know 0:15:49.240 --> 0:15:52.440 I struggle with anxiety. Man, I try my best to 0:15:52.560 --> 0:15:55.600 live up to my parents. How you ask, standard's okay? 0:15:56.000 --> 0:15:58.480 Maybe you're right, Marco, I was a punk ass hide 0:15:58.640 --> 0:16:01.960 behind this person, but this changed. I want to be 0:16:02.040 --> 0:16:04.560 the face of it. And what a better way to 0:16:04.680 --> 0:16:07.560 reveal my identity than on our official account at the 0:16:07.640 --> 0:16:09.880 viral Villa. This weekend, we could blow up to a 0:16:09.920 --> 0:16:13.080 whole new level the unmasking of mask on that still 0:16:13.080 --> 0:16:17.120 doesn't address your whole parental situation, Janelle, let me handle that. 0:16:17.640 --> 0:16:19.200 I think it makes sense for no one to go 0:16:19.560 --> 0:16:22.680 Like Marco said, we'll catch them next time around. Were 0:16:22.760 --> 0:16:26.440 like them Goes or the Fujis. Remember our squad is 0:16:26.440 --> 0:16:30.160 a package deal. This is going all wrong. These two 0:16:30.160 --> 0:16:33.120 were supposed to support me on this. I'm scrambling to 0:16:33.200 --> 0:16:35.520 keep some window of opportunity open and they want to 0:16:35.600 --> 0:16:37.960 let it slip us by How can they not get 0:16:37.960 --> 0:16:40.920 on board? Fake ideas are fine, but blowing off my 0:16:41.000 --> 0:16:43.520 parents as a deal breaker. I can't believe they let 0:16:43.520 --> 0:16:48.400 this shot go. Okay, fine, no further action. Then I'll 0:16:48.400 --> 0:16:51.880 write them in response, letting them know cool onto the 0:16:51.960 --> 0:16:55.400 business of your list. We talked to you the rest 0:16:55.440 --> 0:16:58.240 of the podcast business. But I can't get viral Bill 0:16:58.320 --> 0:17:00.920 out of my head. The chance has to celebrate here 0:17:00.920 --> 0:17:03.440 comes to break with a bunch of piers. All of 0:17:03.440 --> 0:17:06.679 this resistance has induled the fantasy a bit, but I 0:17:06.680 --> 0:17:09.639 don't say anything on the call let's turned into the 0:17:09.640 --> 0:17:12.919 same sort of disapproval as my talks with my parents downstairs. 0:17:14.160 --> 0:17:18.040 I feel silent more than ever, and I keep asking 0:17:18.080 --> 0:17:23.080 myself do I have the guts to go anyway? During 0:17:23.119 --> 0:17:26.080 the call, I came up with the idea of the unmasking, 0:17:26.400 --> 0:17:29.000 of taking my mask on persona off, turning the trip west. 0:17:29.760 --> 0:17:32.560 I'm going on the trip without Marco and janew It 0:17:32.600 --> 0:17:35.480 seems perfect. It will blow up my social fees and 0:17:35.520 --> 0:17:38.480 expose us to a wider audience, a national audience, to 0:17:38.520 --> 0:17:40.520 fit with the fact our interview requests are coming from 0:17:40.560 --> 0:17:43.080 all over, and makes me all the more convinced. I've 0:17:43.080 --> 0:17:46.400 got to say yes to the invite, but damn the consequences. 0:17:47.320 --> 0:17:49.840 I'm overwhelmed at the idea of betraying my friends trust 0:17:49.840 --> 0:17:53.360 and my parents trust once again. Normally this is where 0:17:53.359 --> 0:17:56.280 I meditate to calm down, but I don't want to. 0:17:57.000 --> 0:18:00.600 I'm feeding off my anger with my parents, my frustrations 0:18:00.600 --> 0:18:03.720 with Marco and Janelle for being so level headed. It's 0:18:03.760 --> 0:18:07.680 not my anxiety anymore, this rocket fuel. When the call 0:18:07.840 --> 0:18:10.840 is over, the only thing left to do is act. 0:18:13.359 --> 0:18:15.520 I leap up from my bed and settle into my 0:18:15.600 --> 0:18:19.600 desk chair. Start typing away Immediately, I jump onto a 0:18:19.640 --> 0:18:21.600 travel site and book of flight for tomorrow at noon, 0:18:22.280 --> 0:18:24.840 just like I thought about earlier, sneak out of the 0:18:24.840 --> 0:18:27.160 houses of going to school and then make my way 0:18:27.160 --> 0:18:30.120 to JFK. Instead, my parents gave me a credit card 0:18:30.119 --> 0:18:32.639 to use only in case of emergencies, and I use 0:18:32.680 --> 0:18:35.199 it to buy the ticket. One more cry to be 0:18:35.240 --> 0:18:38.360 just for later, but better to ask forgiveness than permission. 0:18:40.119 --> 0:18:42.080 I start running around my room and throwing closes in 0:18:42.160 --> 0:18:44.359 my book bag, cramming them down, so this room for 0:18:44.400 --> 0:18:46.360 a couple of shirts and shorts along with my laptop. 0:18:46.640 --> 0:18:49.160 If I'm gonna make this trip under cover, I'm gonna 0:18:49.200 --> 0:18:51.160 have to leave the house with just the backpack tomorrow 0:18:52.280 --> 0:18:54.520 when it's all done, I said at the computer and 0:18:54.560 --> 0:18:56.359 stare at the message from the villa, and I have 0:18:56.480 --> 0:18:59.120 to respond to it. But Janelle and Marco can check 0:18:59.160 --> 0:19:01.960 this account too. That's why I've saved it for last. 0:19:02.640 --> 0:19:06.080 They could see me the fire agreed upon plan. In fact, 0:19:06.640 --> 0:19:10.720 they definitely will eventually. But if I leave a note 0:19:10.720 --> 0:19:13.119 at home about where I went, then when my parents 0:19:13.119 --> 0:19:16.520 freak out, Marco and Janelle can confirm what happened by 0:19:16.600 --> 0:19:20.000 checking it here comes to break account history. I take 0:19:20.040 --> 0:19:24.840 a deep breath and start typing a response. Yes, I 0:19:24.880 --> 0:19:26.640 would love to come out to the bill of this weekend. 0:19:27.119 --> 0:19:31.200 I'll hop a flight tomorrow. A giant wave of nervous 0:19:31.320 --> 0:19:35.000 energy crashes over me. With each forward step, I confront 0:19:35.040 --> 0:19:37.520 whether I'm really gonna do this or not. But I 0:19:37.560 --> 0:19:40.440 am so empt up. I backed the second guess in 0:19:40.480 --> 0:19:43.480 a way. I have to do this. The pod needs it, 0:19:44.040 --> 0:19:47.600 I need it. I'm tired of overthinking things. I hit 0:19:47.760 --> 0:19:54.000 sin and now an exclusive track from l A the Goat. 0:20:06.800 --> 0:20:08.800 Life cold, but at least we get to wear a 0:20:08.920 --> 0:20:12.200 Jackie one from you either die or either make it happy. 0:20:12.560 --> 0:20:14.639 Not in the million years I thought that I'll make 0:20:14.720 --> 0:20:17.280 it rapping hit my busines look like I gotta had 0:20:17.280 --> 0:20:20.280 a beautiful passion. Jacob Apple got me doing a lot. 0:20:20.880 --> 0:20:23.359 I was on the sideline trying to get a spot. 0:20:23.680 --> 0:20:25.680 A couple of niggas went in love because they ain't 0:20:25.720 --> 0:20:28.560 see the plot, paying pictures with these lyrics like I'm 0:20:28.560 --> 0:20:31.480 about Skiyat used to tell my people I was trying 0:20:31.480 --> 0:20:33.760 to be a rapper. They wanted me to get a 0:20:33.880 --> 0:20:36.720 job and answer to a master with all new respect. 0:20:36.720 --> 0:20:39.080 That's not the kind of life. I'm app I'm the 0:20:39.119 --> 0:20:41.960 author of my book and I'm still writing chaplins. Yeah, 0:20:42.400 --> 0:20:45.399 streets so dirty swords and nigga gotta stay cleaning? How 0:20:45.480 --> 0:20:47.800 go the jar Rods? What the fund is a saying? Lean? 0:20:48.480 --> 0:20:51.320 This told me? Never let these niggas played me. I 0:20:51.440 --> 0:20:54.480 played dumb. But I'm alone away from Craig. How you 0:20:54.560 --> 0:20:57.720 from Temple? But he come in like he Jake no captain. 0:20:57.800 --> 0:21:01.000 Microphone the only thing that saved me. Without wrapped, I 0:21:01.160 --> 0:21:04.280 probably end up going crazy. Should I be doing? Never 0:21:04.440 --> 0:21:07.800 ceased to amaze? Trap, got slow? I got a job. 0:21:07.840 --> 0:21:10.440 I ain't lazy. I signed the Dipper. Sometimes I still 0:21:10.440 --> 0:21:12.639 feel like I ain't made waste to be on my 0:21:12.680 --> 0:21:15.240 mind and I can't like that ship crazy. I'm coming 0:21:15.280 --> 0:21:18.320 in the game strong like I'm vic babe, having on 0:21:18.440 --> 0:21:20.840 my ground on we if I throw on what I'm 0:21:20.880 --> 0:21:24.119 doing one man on nigga. One believe ivn't dropping tracked 0:21:24.119 --> 0:21:27.040 and feeling pain. You don't bleeve, I got PTSD, I 0:21:27.119 --> 0:21:30.080 see my partner. Nothing for sitting on this coup deem 0:21:30.200 --> 0:21:33.439 y'all having find you don't gotta ask me if I 0:21:33.480 --> 0:21:36.040 got it, cause I keep see my dog die and 0:21:36.119 --> 0:21:38.560 left my heart broke in peace the ship that I'd 0:21:38.640 --> 0:21:41.160 be doing. Man, the niggas wouldn't believe if you leave 0:21:41.200 --> 0:21:43.879 a house broke and you came out wrong a couple 0:21:43.880 --> 0:21:46.439 of hundreds and they're facing, they'll be coming, not throne 0:21:46.720 --> 0:21:49.040 in a game like the shirt with a whole got 0:21:49.040 --> 0:21:51.480 it sold Moncas stored it so much cane. Now he 0:21:51.520 --> 0:21:53.920 can't feeling no, and it cane is on his brain. 0:21:54.080 --> 0:21:56.359 So I got his feelings gonna. I was kin in 0:21:56.400 --> 0:21:58.840 this craze. T Let me hold the chrome. It was 0:21:58.920 --> 0:22:01.119 going off the egg, so he put the safety on. 0:22:01.280 --> 0:22:03.600 Plus I was always touching ship. They made my mama 0:22:03.640 --> 0:22:06.480 take me on sick for all that payon. We draw 0:22:06.560 --> 0:22:09.160 down on your just like Crayon, because I can never 0:22:09.240 --> 0:22:11.720 go out like I'm cray Von black on Black who 0:22:11.880 --> 0:22:14.360 called it sold them blank in a can front door 0:22:14.480 --> 0:22:17.520 servants like a nigga selling a Von hauled up at 0:22:17.520 --> 0:22:20.800 you standing on the stage, holes looking from the line, 0:22:21.160 --> 0:22:24.119 trying to get saved to be leaked page. We just 0:22:24.160 --> 0:22:27.000 wanted their slaves. I can feed there and broking tell 0:22:27.040 --> 0:22:30.560 you where everything okay? Feeling like make all the haters 0:22:30.600 --> 0:22:34.160 go away, DoD guy so wn't ride with th aways 0:22:34.440 --> 0:22:37.000 that since they killed on the pain on Lord Way. 0:22:37.080 --> 0:22:39.639 That's why I've been popping perks and going up before 0:22:39.840 --> 0:22:43.000 day um play the streets like my enemies. I keep 0:22:43.040 --> 0:22:45.240 them close. I talked to Wayne the other night. I 0:22:45.280 --> 0:22:47.600 feel like I'm seeing ghosts when I'm like this, I 0:22:47.640 --> 0:22:49.960 feel like I need to be left alone. I don't 0:22:49.960 --> 0:22:52.479