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Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that's getting into the toothpaste game.

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Speaker 1: But not like everybody else who's focused on whitening. He's

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Speaker 1: ahead of the curve going with yellowing, and you can't

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Speaker 1: do that without a nice tuna flavored toothpaste. Thinning grim

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Speaker 1: light up the room in a different way. With laser stories,

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Speaker 1: we read weird news stories around the globe, just like

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Speaker 1: everyone else does, except we've got a laser.

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Speaker 2: There's other sea chickens.

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Speaker 1: Just don't this first laser stories out of Florida, Strong

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Speaker 1: star Jeff No. This might shock you, but the Sunshine

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Speaker 1: State has been number one for the last decade in

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Speaker 1: food assaults. Okay, there's been reports of Floridians being arrested

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Speaker 1: for throwing burgers and silly stuff like chicken nuggets or skittles.

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Speaker 3: I was gonna be thrown fist, So actually this is

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Speaker 3: a lot.

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Speaker 2: Latest situation is a little different because.

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Speaker 1: A fifty six year old woman named Shelley Hardwick got

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Speaker 1: into a verbal altercation with her boyfriend and things got

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Speaker 1: serious when she picked up a whole watermelon and threw

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Speaker 1: it at the guy.

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Speaker 2: Yeah that's actually I.

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Speaker 3: Mean is it both hands overhand?

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Speaker 2: Is one hand in the or to put it in

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Speaker 2: her mouth and like shoot it at the spit beld it.

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Speaker 2: Only you can do that, Jeff. Fortunately he was able

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Speaker 2: to dodge it.

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Speaker 3: But they're not very fast.

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Speaker 2: Movie. That's like a speeding bullet. Well, he wasn't prepared

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Speaker 2: for what happened next.

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Speaker 1: Shelley was already locked and loaded with a second watermelon

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Speaker 1: that barely missed his head. She was like, burly, and

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Speaker 1: how is he not prepared?

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Speaker 2: He didn't see the second water load.

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Speaker 3: I would feel like a canalope would be a lot

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Speaker 3: more deadly, you know.

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Speaker 1: The second watermelon flew by his ear and splattered against

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Speaker 1: the wall behind him.

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Speaker 2: Smash so mad, so she put it through it pretty hard. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: she just got her upper body workout.

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Speaker 1: Police were called and when they got there, they found

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Speaker 1: Shelley grabbing another watermelon out of the back of her carmelons.

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Speaker 2: So they detained her.

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Speaker 1: And that's when she told cops that she only threw

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Speaker 1: the first two watermelons out of frustration.

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Speaker 2: The third was going to be cut up for dinner.

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Speaker 2: This is my last watermelon. I could's so big.

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Speaker 1: She also denied trying to hit her boyfriend intentionally, but

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Speaker 1: the cops looked at him and saw there were watermelon

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Speaker 1: seeds on his face and clothing. So she was arrested

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Speaker 1: for domestic battery and spent a night in jail. She

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Speaker 1: was my water, and she was ordered not to have

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Speaker 1: contact with the boyfriend and to stay two hundred yards

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Speaker 1: away from any grocery store in the air. This next

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Speaker 1: Lazer story is out of thin city.

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Speaker 2: Thin. I want to be hot?

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Speaker 3: Oh?

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Speaker 1: The new Hollywood fad to get there is simply to

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Speaker 1: eat yogurt, and not just any kind.

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Speaker 3: Of yogurt, like the yogurt diet, like the cabbage soup

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Speaker 3: diet I did back in the late nineties.

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Speaker 2: That diet, it was so gross.

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Speaker 1: No, this is much better, and it's because it's not

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Speaker 1: just any yogurt. It's thirty eight dollars yogurt.

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Speaker 2: Oh my goodness.

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Speaker 1: It's called coconut cult and people are obsessed with it.

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Speaker 2: It's all over TikTok right now, like a glass jar.

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Speaker 1: The reviews are claiming that it is the best creamiest

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Speaker 1: yogurt people have ever tasted. No, no, I just said

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Speaker 1: it's yogurt, kid, But how does it make you hot?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Well, one influencer named Kelly Peter answers that question.

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Speaker 2: Here's what she says.

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Speaker 4: I never looked hotter. Somebody called nine one one. My

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Speaker 4: stomach has never been platter. It is probably a legal

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Speaker 4: how flat my stomach is. And you know why that is.

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Speaker 4: It's because I'm going to the bathroom regularly. I'm going

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Speaker 4: number two regularly.

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Speaker 2: There's the secret.

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Speaker 1: It's reported that eating the pricey coconut cult daily can

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Speaker 1: help with your digestion, reduce bloating, and clear up your skin.

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Speaker 2: Okay, it's like a laxident. So there they go.

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Speaker 3: Probiotics for a lot less than thirty eighth.

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Speaker 1: No, not the good stuff. It's Hollywood's latest fad to

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Speaker 1: get you to poop more.

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Speaker 2: Thanks, it looks sexy. Yeah, Hollywood, you're regular.

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Speaker 1: Let's go to your next laser story out of Pet Central,

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Speaker 1: an organization that helps people with issues related to emotional

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Speaker 1: support animals, wants to raise awareness for their cause, and

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Speaker 1: they'll be doing it by paying you one thousand.

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Speaker 2: Dollars to watch pet movies.

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Speaker 1: If you're the lucky person selected, you will watch fifteen

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Speaker 1: movies about pets and their owners over a seventy two

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Speaker 1: hour period. Although fifteen movies and seventy two hours.

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Speaker 2: That's a lot of movies that you're gonna have to

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Speaker 2: squeeze in. Yeah, that's yeah.

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Speaker 3: You may not be able to sleep actually late, literally

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Speaker 3: three hours each.

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Speaker 1: None of us can do that thirty six hours for

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Speaker 1: twelve movies. You will document your reaction and create a

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Speaker 1: blog post about how Hollywood portrays animals effect on the

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Speaker 1: mental well being of humans.

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Speaker 3: Jeff decided by the end of the seventy two hours

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Speaker 3: is not.

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Speaker 1: Going to be good, and it sounds like they pick

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Speaker 1: the movies, but they're open to suggestions. Their list did

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Speaker 1: include several possibilities, though, including All Dogs.

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Speaker 2: Go to Heaven. Oh God, hold on. They also have

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Speaker 2: Marley and me.

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Speaker 1: Ah, they'll have to be cracking up all the way

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Speaker 1: till the end, and then All Dogs Go to Heaven

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Speaker 1: Part two.

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Speaker 2: All Right, I'm sensing a theme here. All Dogs go

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Speaker 2: to Hell. That's going to be a question. That's just

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Speaker 2: one dog, just one bad, bad dog.

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Speaker 1: Joe, there's a one hundred chance you will be bawling

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Speaker 1: during this movie marathon. But at least you don't have

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Speaker 1: time to go outside or go to work, because fifteen

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Speaker 1: movies in seventy two hours, that is a lot of

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Speaker 1: crying open your eyes, they're gonna be stolen from crying

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Speaker 1: and life sensitive.

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Speaker 2: From the movie.

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Speaker 3: I'm only watching Incredible Life of Pets.

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Speaker 2: That's a good secret Life of Pets.

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Speaker 3: Brough.

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Speaker 2: Sorry, sorry this.

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Speaker 1: Next laser story out of Baby World day. Did you

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Speaker 1: know Jen Alpha isn't the youngest generation anymore?

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Speaker 4: Wow?

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Speaker 1: January first mark the start of Jen Beta.

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Speaker 2: That's what they're called. I don't know, they got kind

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Speaker 2: of a crappy name.

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Speaker 3: Sorry.

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Speaker 1: Beta Jen betas for people born between twenty twenty five

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Speaker 1: and twenty thirty nine. And like you guys said, not

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Speaker 1: everybody's crazy about the name.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it feels like second tier, like going to bed.

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Speaker 1: The Wall Street Journal just ran this headline yesterday, quote,

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Speaker 1: a new generation is here. Its name is already an insult.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I.

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Speaker 3: Get they went like alpha and then the next letter

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Speaker 3: is in the Greek but nobody else has Greek letters

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Speaker 3: like do whatever you want.

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Speaker 1: But aside from the Greek alphabet, it's also slang for

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Speaker 1: someone who is passive or week, especially men who are passive,

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Speaker 1: the opposite of an alpha male winning.

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Speaker 3: We'll call it gen Sigma. Yeah, you want to be sigma.

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Speaker 2: Well, that's way down the alphabet we're trying to hype

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Speaker 2: these babies up. Jeh, okay, where's the decorum? Though? The

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Speaker 2: world needs order. You can't just name stuff whatever you

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Speaker 2: want to name it, alright, Beta.

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Speaker 1: A researcher in Australia coined the terms gen alpha and

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Speaker 1: jen beta. He says there's nothing wrong with them, and

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Speaker 1: the system makes sense.

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Speaker 2: I agree. I mean it's a technical system.

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Speaker 1: So then the next generation would be gamma, then Delta,

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Speaker 1: then so on and so forth.

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Speaker 2: The alphabet Brook.

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Speaker 3: Gamma is a sorority, and it's gonna be two generations

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Speaker 3: that are drinking a lot.

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Speaker 1: But some people don't love the idea of their kid

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Speaker 1: being called a beta.

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Speaker 2: Their entire life.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so it's not too late to switch it up

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Speaker 1: and go with a different name if people agree on

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Speaker 1: something else. One idea that's being tossed around is generation

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Speaker 1: AI because they're never going to know a.

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Speaker 2: World without it. That's it's true.

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Speaker 1: And I know someone who's pumped about that option because

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Speaker 1: he's been working on his new AI project for months

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Speaker 1: now called shell GPT.

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Speaker 2: Like it just turns all your font grain. Oh nothing else.

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Speaker 1: Okay, guys, a genius brook give him the credit he

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Speaker 1: has and that's how means Laser.

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Speaker 2: Stories has come to an end for the day. We'll

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Speaker 2: do it again the same time on Wednesday, Brooke and

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Speaker 2: Jeffrey in the morning,