WEBVTT - Second Cup: Feedback is about the person giving it

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning,

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<v Speaker 1>This is Laura, Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's

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<v Speaker 1>tip is that feedback is about the person giving it.

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<v Speaker 1>It can be helpful or unhelpful, but it is important

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<v Speaker 1>to keep it in perspective. I recently reread Tara Moore's

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<v Speaker 1>book Playing Big, which has lots of helpful tips about

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<v Speaker 1>finding your voice and becoming more influential. More reminds readers

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<v Speaker 1>that feedback from your target audience is incredibly helpful, but

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<v Speaker 1>with feedback in general, you have to keep in mind

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<v Speaker 1>that it is simply telling you about the person who

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<v Speaker 1>is giving it, nothing more. Here is one quick exercise

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<v Speaker 1>More suggests as a way to realize this. Think about

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<v Speaker 1>a book you read recently that you enjoyed. Now go

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<v Speaker 1>to Amazon and read the reviews. Read a five star

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<v Speaker 1>review and read a one star or two star review,

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<v Speaker 1>because for almost every major book there are going to

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<v Speaker 1>be some of both. Sometimes these polar opposite reviews can

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<v Speaker 1>even be talking about the same thing. Someone thinks the

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<v Speaker 1>characters are wildly inventive. Someone else thinks they're unbelievable. All

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<v Speaker 1>that feedback really tells you is that the first person

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<v Speaker 1>likes characters who require a little more imagination that get

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<v Speaker 1>you into a different world. The second likes characters that

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<v Speaker 1>you feel you already know. Now, neither is particularly right.

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<v Speaker 1>It might matter which reader is in the target market,

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<v Speaker 1>but you don't really get to stand there in a

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<v Speaker 1>bookstore or library and dictate who picks it up. Now,

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<v Speaker 1>if you'd like to get your book published by a

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<v Speaker 1>particular publisher and the editor who acquires your kind of

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<v Speaker 1>fiction likes characters in a certain style, well that feedback

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<v Speaker 1>will matter if you want that particular outcome. But with

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<v Speaker 1>a lot of feedback to eat your own. Now, if

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<v Speaker 1>you get a lot of a particular kind of feedback

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<v Speaker 1>and it resonates with you, incorporate it. If you get

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<v Speaker 1>a lot of feedback that doesn't resonate with you, but

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<v Speaker 1>those people aren't in your target market and aren't decision makers,

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<v Speaker 1>and whether your project sees the light of day, well

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<v Speaker 1>feel free to thank people for their feedback and move on.

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<v Speaker 1>I think this is so important because I have seen

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<v Speaker 1>people try to adjust their entire style based on say,

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<v Speaker 1>one review left on a podcast. I have seen people

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<v Speaker 1>wither based on one critical comment on their outfit or

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<v Speaker 1>something like that once upon a time, people could only

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<v Speaker 1>give such feedback in person, which tempered the comments a bit.

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<v Speaker 1>Once you are over the age of eight or so,

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<v Speaker 1>very few people will flat out insult someone to their face,

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<v Speaker 1>but online people can become playground tyrants. Again. Now again,

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<v Speaker 1>this isn't to say some feedback isn't helpful. I have

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<v Speaker 1>had incredibly helpful editors in my life. I've also had

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<v Speaker 1>not so helpful editors. I've had readers give suggestions which

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<v Speaker 1>changed my whole insight on something. It is truly a

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<v Speaker 1>beautiful thing. I've also had readers give what sounds like

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<v Speaker 1>really horrible suggestions. So you just have to realize that

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<v Speaker 1>feedback only tells you about the person giving it. It

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<v Speaker 1>tells you if they liked your work or they didn't,

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<v Speaker 1>or something they thought worked or didn't. It doesn't fundamentally

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<v Speaker 1>say whether your work is good or not. When you

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<v Speaker 1>realize that, you feel free to incorporate what is helpful,

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<v Speaker 1>but keep your sense of self and control over your

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<v Speaker 1>work when it isn't helpful. There are a lot of

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<v Speaker 1>critics in the world, so best to keep that mindset.

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<v Speaker 1>In the meantime, this is Laura, Thanks for listening and

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<v Speaker 1>here's to making the most of our time. Thanks for

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<v Speaker 1>listening to Before Breakfast. If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback,

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<v Speaker 1>you can reach me at Laura at Laura vandercam dot com.

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<v Speaker 1>Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts

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