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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam, this is John, and we are

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Speaker 1: the founding hosts of Okay Storytime podcast and we have

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Speaker 1: some foundational stories coming.

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Speaker 2: Up for you.

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Speaker 1: But the thing is this foundation needs a little support

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Speaker 1: from these sponsors. So stick around two minutes we'll get

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Speaker 1: into the episode.

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Speaker 3: My girlfriend still lives with her ex. I feel like

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Speaker 3: the other man.

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Speaker 4: Well maybe you are. I don't know.

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Speaker 5: It sounds like you're living that life.

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Speaker 2: Brother.

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Speaker 3: So I started dating this new girl two months ago.

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Speaker 3: We met on Plenty of Fish and she just wanted

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Speaker 3: to casually date it first and wasn't looking for a relationship.

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Speaker 5: I agreed.

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Speaker 3: And by the way, this comes from user hands off

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Speaker 3: my throw. Hey, and if you want to submit your

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Speaker 3: own stories, go to our slash Okay Storytime subrend it. So, however,

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Speaker 3: since then, we've gotten a lot closer. We're really into

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Speaker 3: each other, and we even admitted to each other that

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Speaker 3: we basically are dating and exclusive to one another. She

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Speaker 3: very clearly agreed with me when I suggested this. She

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Speaker 3: always wants to come over to my place. All of

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Speaker 3: our together time happens at my place, like watching the

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Speaker 3: NETFLI in Linden Heers, sleeping over, etc. I was only

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Speaker 3: at her place a few times, and never for long,

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Speaker 3: usually only when picking her up or dropping her off.

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Speaker 3: Never a long visit, about fifteen minutes max, which was

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Speaker 3: okay with me. She mentioned a roommate and I assumed

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Speaker 3: it was another woman, and okay, she didn't want to

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Speaker 3: bring a dude back there regularly. She talked about this

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Speaker 3: ex a lot named John. That was a major red flag.

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Speaker 3: Of course, he was a Division one college athlete and

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Speaker 3: has a great job, great body, in great car, which

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Speaker 3: of course no new boyfriend wants to hear about the

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Speaker 3: old boyfriend.

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Speaker 4: Did you say that as a red flag, that his

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Speaker 4: name was John.

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Speaker 3: He's not the red flag, OPI, brother, this is the

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Speaker 3: guy you worry about, Okay, to be clear. But she

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Speaker 3: also said he was a major a hole and didn't

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Speaker 3: care about her and treated her like crap and he

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Speaker 3: can go f himself.

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Speaker 5: Okay.

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Speaker 3: I told her that I kind of thought she was

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Speaker 3: still in love with him, since she talked about him

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Speaker 3: so much, but she got pissed and said she wasn't.

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Speaker 5: She said he broke her heart.

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Speaker 3: She still kind of talks about him, but called him

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Speaker 3: a friend and didn't name him or call him an ex.

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Speaker 3: But I'm not stupid and kind of figured it out

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Speaker 3: that it was him because of context clues. She mentioned

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Speaker 3: her roommate was giving her a ride home from work.

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Speaker 3: She doesn't like to drive in heavy traffic or whatever

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Speaker 3: and works in the city, so sometimes her roommate will

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Speaker 3: give her a ride there and home. She said they

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Speaker 3: were grabbing dinner on their way home. It was a

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Speaker 3: bar restaurant in the city I really like, with good

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Speaker 3: food and cool atmosphere. This conversation followed, and it's paraphrased

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Speaker 3: from memory. I said, Hey, why don't I drive down there?

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Speaker 3: You know traffic won't be that bad going into the city.

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Speaker 3: We can have dinner and drinks together down there. You know,

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Speaker 3: I love that place.

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Speaker 5: She says, I don't know.

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Speaker 3: He wouldn't like that. I said, who's he exactly? And

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Speaker 3: she said, oh, my roommate. Is your roommate a guy?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 5: Actually John lives with me. Still, uh, what thought?

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Speaker 2: F huh? This is not cool?

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Speaker 5: Oh, I mean, it's not that big of a deal.

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Speaker 5: If he's just a friend, just.

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Speaker 4: A friend who can say whether you go somewhere or not.

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Speaker 5: Just a friend who you have had coitus with. Why, yes,

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Speaker 5: why indeed, he's.

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Speaker 3: Just my friend where I've done coitus with because okay, the.

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Speaker 6: Only example I can think of of, like living with

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Speaker 6: your exites from New Girl.

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Speaker 4: But in that situation, it was like they were like.

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Speaker 6: Kind of fine, yeah, okay, different, I'm just making a joke.

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Speaker 3: It really doesn't matter who anyone has done anything with. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: the only thing is that this girl kept talking.

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Speaker 5: About John Saxony broke my heart and I don't like him,

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Speaker 5: and he treats to me like crap, And why are

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Speaker 5: you going to get dinner and drinks with him?

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Speaker 6: Why is she saying like, no, I don't think we

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Speaker 6: should do that because my ex boyfriend, who is also

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Speaker 6: my roommate wouldn't like that.

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Speaker 5: Right, because she's still in love with this guy and

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Speaker 5: she wants to date it.

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Speaker 3: So if I'm OPA at this point, it's two months,

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Speaker 3: this isn't that serious, dude. You leave honestly nothing, there's

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Speaker 3: nothing here worth your time.

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Speaker 6: Good good time to go, good good time and not

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Speaker 6: too invested.

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Speaker 2: But you know enough to know you don't want to

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Speaker 2: be there.

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Speaker 3: Run. I ignore her text For the rest of the night.

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Speaker 3: She was mostly like hey, please don't be mad. I

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Speaker 3: can explain. She tried to call once, but I sent

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Speaker 3: her to voicemail. He finally talked the next day, and

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Speaker 3: I got the whole story. They lived together in an apartment,

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Speaker 3: he pays for it. When they broke up, she wanted

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Speaker 3: to stay there or couldn't afford to live alone, so

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Speaker 3: they agreed to be roommates, and she pays, from what

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Speaker 3: I can tell, a small share of the monthly rent.

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Speaker 3: He still drives her to work sometimes, and they go

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Speaker 3: out to dinners and bars occasionally, but just as friends.

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Speaker 3: I asked if there were friends who occasionally kissed or

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Speaker 3: fooled around, and she said no. They had separate bedrooms

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Speaker 3: and there weren't any benefits, and differences in the bedroom

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Speaker 3: were what started the chain of events that led him

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Speaker 3: the breaking up. I'm not an idiot, and I'm still

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Speaker 3: smelling major bs, so I ask why I can't meet him.

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Speaker 5: She says.

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Speaker 3: They agreed not to bring new girlfriends or boyfriends around

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Speaker 3: the apartment or around each other.

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Speaker 5: She whizz, I wonder why that is? Maybe because they

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Speaker 5: love feelings for each other.

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Speaker 6: Pretty safe to say, I just there's so many.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's me running away from this as fast as

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Speaker 3: I can.

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Speaker 5: If I'm opeople.

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Speaker 3: Out of don't need her to explain why she lied

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Speaker 3: to you and deceived you.

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Speaker 5: You know why she would do that, So yeah, just

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Speaker 5: go ahead and leave.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I told her that this agreement was really kind of

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Speaker 3: effed up, because if they were both over each other

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Speaker 3: and we're just friends, they wouldn't feel weird about bringing

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Speaker 3: new partners around their apartment. I said she should have

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Speaker 3: explained this to me earlier, because now I felt like

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Speaker 3: I was lied to and I felt like the other guy.

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Speaker 3: She begged me to stay with her and said it

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Speaker 3: wasn't like that despite their history, they were done and

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Speaker 3: through and she wasn't romantically attracted to him. I was

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Speaker 3: perfect for her, and she thought I was amazing and

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Speaker 3: he was a dunky and etcetera, etcetera. So I keep

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Speaker 3: seeing her. This was a few weeks ago, and we

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Speaker 3: kept on why am I a dumb door?

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Speaker 2: Matt.

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Speaker 5: Here's the thing. She is always available.

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Speaker 3: I can pretty much call her, text her whenever I

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Speaker 3: want and get a response. It isn't like sometimes she's

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Speaker 3: hiding me from him. If they were dating and I

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Speaker 3: was the other man, it isn't like she's sneaking around.

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Speaker 5: She's free to do stuff mostly.

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Speaker 3: Whenever we want, and she sleeps over at my place

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Speaker 3: quite regularly, so it's not like she has to rush

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Speaker 3: home to be with him. Plus, he was kind of

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Speaker 3: an a hole, and she said that the spicy sleep

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Speaker 3: with him was all about him, and he was pretty inconsiderate.

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Speaker 3: And he also never wanted kids ever, And this is

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Speaker 3: what she told me. She said he would whoa. Uh, Okay,

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Speaker 3: we're just gonna skip that point. Yeah, guy really doesn't

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Speaker 3: want kids.

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Speaker 2: Not a guy who want to be around. No, a

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Speaker 2: guy who want to be around for how he's going

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Speaker 2: about that.

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Speaker 3: And your reason for continuing to live with this guy

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Speaker 3: is because you couldn't afford to live on your own. Hey,

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Speaker 3: did you know that other people can be your roommate

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Speaker 3: besides your ex boyfriend?

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Speaker 2: It's possible. It's possible. Hello, he has paid for the

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Speaker 2: whole thing, though, apparently.

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Speaker 6: I mean that makes it way more complicated or even

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Speaker 6: more crazy and obvious that this isn't a what's holling situation? Ajeez, Louise,

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Speaker 6: you know I don't.

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Speaker 2: I don't like it.

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Speaker 3: She kind of wants kids one day, and so do I.

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Speaker 3: So I assumed they were romantically incompatible and she had

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Speaker 3: more of a future with me. What led me to

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Speaker 3: make this post is that her cousin got married yesterday.

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Speaker 3: What the hell are we talking about?

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Speaker 4: What's not on anymore?

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Speaker 3: Okay, I understand taking a partner to something like that

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Speaker 3: is a big deal, meeting the whole family. Maybe it's

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Speaker 3: too soon for us, but she took him and didn't

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Speaker 3: tell me until the last minute. She said she didn't

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Speaker 3: want to pressure me by meeting her whole family so soon,

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Speaker 3: and they already know. I was pissed and I told

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Speaker 3: her so. She said she was already expecting to go

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Speaker 3: and she didn't want to say anything. I told her

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Speaker 3: this wasn't cool, and she was seriously testing the boundaries

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Speaker 3: of what I was okay with. She said I was

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Speaker 3: being needy and needed to back off. I gave it

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Speaker 3: sixty minutes, then apologized and asked if she wanted to

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Speaker 3: come over to my place after the wedding to watch

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Speaker 3: Netflix and Space the night. I know it would be

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Speaker 3: like midnight or one am or whatever, but it was

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Speaker 3: a little bit of a loyalty test, if you will,

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Speaker 3: she said. She text me as they were leaving. So

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Speaker 3: last night rolls around. I stay up until one thirty

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Speaker 3: in the morning without hearing from her.

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Speaker 5: Then I got a few barely coherent texts from her.

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Speaker 3: She was superch wasted, said she couldn't drive over to

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Speaker 3: my place and just wanted to go to sleep. And

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Speaker 3: told her I could pick her up and we could

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Speaker 3: hang out and watch TV and she could tell me

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Speaker 3: about the wedding.

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Speaker 5: No reply. I went to sleep pissed. I hope you're

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Speaker 5: pissed at yourself.

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Speaker 2: Brother.

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Speaker 3: I don't know. Am I being out of line here?

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Speaker 5: Okay?

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Speaker 3: She lived with this guy and then they broke up,

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Speaker 3: and economically she can't live alone, so she stayed with

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Speaker 3: him as a roommate and paid rent. That I can

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Speaker 3: understand what now stand that that I could understand you're crazy.

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Speaker 4: But but what part are you not a standing with me?

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Speaker 5: She's like, I.

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Speaker 7: Understand, she only had one person on earth she could

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Speaker 7: be a roommate with, and it was her ex boyfriend.

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Speaker 7: Of course, signed a contract with the devil in Blood

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Speaker 7: and uh yeah, yeah, that's for sure, for sure.

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Speaker 3: He drives her to work, they go to dinner and

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Speaker 3: get drinks. Sometimes that kind of bends what I'll tolerate,

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Speaker 3: but it's still acceptable, I guess as roommate behavior. Then

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Speaker 3: she takes him to a family wedding. This is affed up, right,

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Speaker 3: I should just end this, right, brother, It's been affed

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Speaker 3: up the whole time.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you're right, you are right.

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Speaker 5: Good job, you're on the right track.

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Speaker 3: I live alone, and I guess I'm considering basically asking

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Speaker 3: her to put up and shut up and move in with.

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Speaker 5: Me or it's over. Brother, wrong, brother, brother, brother.

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Speaker 3: Moving in after two months gotta be on the top

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Speaker 3: five list of worst things you could ever do.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, even when you're like in a healthy relationship and

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Speaker 6: when you're not the side piece.

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Speaker 5: Even then, at all times, at all times, it's gotta

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Speaker 5: be terrible.

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Speaker 4: And then so on top of the situation. I don't

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Speaker 4: like that.

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Speaker 2: I don't like that.

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Speaker 3: But that's kind of a crappy ultimated to make. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: not to mention that's an ultimatum.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we don't like those.

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Speaker 5: And we haven't been.

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Speaker 3: Dating that long, although she does spend a lot of

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Speaker 3: nights and weekends here. No, I just don't feel right

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Speaker 3: asking her to move in with me yet or being like,

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Speaker 3: you must find a new roommate all we're done, because

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Speaker 3: that does sound totally insecure and clingy. Yeah, you know

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Speaker 3: what would be secure freaking leaving the relationship, you dummy.

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Speaker 4: Yes, here's what we're looking at.

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Speaker 6: If this is what you're comfortable with, you're either comfortable

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Speaker 6: with her leaving her roommate or we're done.

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Speaker 2: Those are our options.

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Speaker 6: Okay, if we're looking at leaving a roommate, you know

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Speaker 6: you can't ask her to do that, but that is

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Speaker 6: still important to you.

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Speaker 4: You can't ask her to do that.

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Speaker 2: Not an option.

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00:10:35,040 --> 00:10:37,600
Speaker 4: Guess what's left being done? Get out of there.

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Speaker 3: Go.

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Speaker 5: Okay, we got an update. Let's just get into it.

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Speaker 2: Okay, let's do it.

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00:10:41,679 --> 00:10:45,599
Speaker 3: I worked up the nerve and messaged John on Facebook

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Speaker 3: asking if he was dating my girlfriend.

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Speaker 4: I love that John and girlfriend are in quotes and

263
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Speaker 4: that like.

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Speaker 8: A OPI's like, so, what's the ant, sir, it's right

265
00:11:00,880 --> 00:11:03,080
Speaker 8: in your face. No, that's not the answer. I would

266
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Speaker 8: go around that one. There's another answer to that.

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Speaker 2: Talk to this man. But I just love.

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Speaker 3: I just have a question you dating my golf When

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Speaker 3: mister D one athlete D one alf week with the

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Speaker 3: cool cars. The other layer of this is he's the

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Speaker 3: D one athlete with good job and the good body

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Speaker 3: and the good car.

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Speaker 2: I forgot about that. He's like that for real? Do

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Speaker 2: you have maybe a way away from fit with my girlfriend.

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Speaker 4: If so, I would please ask you and thanks very much.

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Speaker 5: So now i'll you know you're on your way out.

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Speaker 2: Mister.

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Speaker 5: You're being very disrespectful.

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Speaker 3: It took him until this morning to reply. This was

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Speaker 3: the whole reply. Yeah dude, yeah yeah, uh, Op says

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Speaker 3: I was kind of upset or whatever.

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Speaker 5: Who is this? They've built this guy.

283
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Speaker 3: In a laboratory, dude, and I want to meet you,

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Speaker 3: oh man. So I called her this morning. I asked

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Speaker 3: her if she and John were dating, and she said no,

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Speaker 3: they were broken up, and she said maybe she shouldn't

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Speaker 3: have told me that they had a history. I told

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Speaker 3: her that I messaged him on Facebook and asked, and

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Speaker 3: he said they were still together, and she was mad

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Speaker 3: for a second, then got flustered and started like pleading

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Speaker 3: with me.

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Speaker 6: Oh no, you're just gonna teach her how to cheat

293
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Speaker 6: better next time.

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Speaker 3: So she reiterated that she dumped him and he wasn't

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Speaker 3: over her. She said he was pretty clear that he

296
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Speaker 3: wanted to win her back and often hit on her

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Speaker 3: or whatever when they were alone, but she said he

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Speaker 3: was just a friend and she cared about him as

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Speaker 3: a friend. But she wasn't attracted to him romantically, and

300
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Speaker 3: she doesn't want to torment him by bringing other guys

301
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Speaker 3: around or whatever. I said, I felt like I was

302
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Speaker 3: a secret in her life and asked about the wedding.

303
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Speaker 3: She said her sisters and friends know they're broken up,

304
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Speaker 3: but her parents really like him and don't know yet.

305
00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:06,360
Speaker 3: I said that was bs and unfair, because now if

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Speaker 3: she tells them about me, suddenly they had no time

307
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Speaker 3: to get over him, and suddenly I become the a

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Speaker 3: hole guy who pried her away from him. She agreed

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Speaker 3: the whole thing was unfair to me, but she really

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Speaker 3: liked me and said I was perfect and made her

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Speaker 3: feel special and she wanted to be with me all

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Speaker 3: the time and not him. Then she said she sort

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Speaker 3: of loved me. I told her not to say that

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Speaker 3: if she didn't mean it. I told her I had

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Speaker 3: to think about this because I couldn't tell if she

316
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Speaker 3: was telling the truth or if I was the other guy.

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Speaker 3: So we have a little bit more story left. We

318
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Speaker 3: all know where we're at. Yep, you're two months into this.

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Speaker 5: You just leave and you you that's it.

320
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Speaker 4: Yeah, you could find another fision to see.

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Speaker 3: She started getting upset, leading with me to believe her,

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Speaker 3: and I told her we might have to say goodbye

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Speaker 3: and I needed time to process all this. I don't

324
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Speaker 3: know what to do. I want to believe her, sweet

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Speaker 3: Summer child.

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Speaker 2: I believe her, but at.

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Speaker 3: The same time, I'm not sure she's over him entirely

328
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Speaker 3: or whatever her He still likes her and actively tells

329
00:14:02,880 --> 00:14:04,439
Speaker 3: her this and tries to sleep with her.

330
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Speaker 5: She likes him as a friend. I don't know.

331
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Speaker 3: How do I know she doesn't come home wasted one

332
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Speaker 3: night and just give in and sleep with him.

333
00:14:10,679 --> 00:14:11,800
Speaker 5: And that's the end of the story.

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00:14:12,920 --> 00:14:16,560
Speaker 9: My girlfriend became way too close to our colleague. They

335
00:14:16,600 --> 00:14:18,160
Speaker 9: always want a lone time.

336
00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:20,520
Speaker 4: What are they doing with all that alone time?

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Speaker 9: Me male twenty one and my girlfriend twenty have been

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00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:27,760
Speaker 9: together since I was sixteen and she was fifteen, and

339
00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:30,720
Speaker 9: we have been inseparable since then. By the way, this

340
00:14:30,800 --> 00:14:32,760
Speaker 9: comes from Citrix, and if you want to sumit your

341
00:14:32,760 --> 00:14:35,040
Speaker 9: own stories, go to the r slash Oaky storytime separate it.

342
00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:37,520
Speaker 9: So we work at the same company, and I've done

343
00:14:37,520 --> 00:14:40,000
Speaker 9: so for about two years now. We even work in

344
00:14:40,040 --> 00:14:43,440
Speaker 9: the same section. So lately she's been getting closer to

345
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Speaker 9: our colleague. A male forty and I have not seen

346
00:14:46,480 --> 00:14:49,280
Speaker 9: a problem with this since he's forty, but recently they

347
00:14:49,280 --> 00:14:51,960
Speaker 9: have wanted to hang out after work separately from me

348
00:14:52,080 --> 00:14:54,400
Speaker 9: and our other friends. Things they do are just going

349
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Speaker 9: for a walk, run, or hikes, which normally take around

350
00:14:57,320 --> 00:15:00,800
Speaker 9: forty minutes to an hour, which is normal. I but

351
00:15:00,880 --> 00:15:02,760
Speaker 9: now my girlfriend wants to have a movie night at

352
00:15:02,760 --> 00:15:05,040
Speaker 9: his house and they're gonna watch the latest Fast and

353
00:15:05,160 --> 00:15:08,400
Speaker 9: Furious movie. I asked to join, but they need to

354
00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:11,560
Speaker 9: be alone because they're going to talk about friends stuff.

355
00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:16,200
Speaker 9: She said. They were like best girlfriends. Either this girl

356
00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:22,320
Speaker 9: is lying to you, yeah, or she's being severely taken

357
00:15:22,360 --> 00:15:25,000
Speaker 9: advantage by this forty year old man, and both are

358
00:15:25,040 --> 00:15:25,440
Speaker 9: not great.

359
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:28,760
Speaker 4: They're they're just like best girlfriends who make out with

360
00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:29,280
Speaker 4: each other.

361
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Speaker 10: Gee.

362
00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:34,040
Speaker 9: Yeah, no, no, no, no, I'm sorry. The optics of

363
00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:36,960
Speaker 9: a forty year old being best gal pals with the

364
00:15:37,080 --> 00:15:40,960
Speaker 9: twenty year old is uh yeah. At first, I thought, Okay,

365
00:15:41,280 --> 00:15:44,000
Speaker 9: that's fine, I guess because again he's forty.

366
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Speaker 6: See that's where you're wrong, buddy, got that's logic.

367
00:15:49,080 --> 00:15:50,920
Speaker 5: That's where it becomes real creepy.

368
00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:53,360
Speaker 4: Hey, don't worry, because it's opposite day.

369
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Speaker 2: Don't worry.

370
00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:56,840
Speaker 4: Op, he just thinks it's opposite day. Yeah, it's fine, but.

371
00:15:57,160 --> 00:15:59,400
Speaker 9: Now after the fact, I'm starting to worry that they're

372
00:15:59,400 --> 00:16:02,520
Speaker 9: getting a little too close to my guy.

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00:16:03,160 --> 00:16:03,320
Speaker 6: Yeah.

374
00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:04,880
Speaker 9: I know he's twenty one, but like if I were

375
00:16:05,040 --> 00:16:06,160
Speaker 9: when I was twenty one.

376
00:16:06,440 --> 00:16:08,560
Speaker 6: You're not gonna go to a forty year old's house

377
00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:13,160
Speaker 6: even if you trust him. No, don't do it.

378
00:16:13,480 --> 00:16:16,320
Speaker 9: Am I going crazier? Is this something male and female

379
00:16:16,360 --> 00:16:19,120
Speaker 9: friends do normally? I don't really have any experience in

380
00:16:19,280 --> 00:16:21,640
Speaker 9: just that because I don't really have any girlfriends that

381
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:24,520
Speaker 9: I am that close with except my girlfriend. So please,

382
00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:28,360
Speaker 9: I need some advice or just outside views on this edit.

383
00:16:28,560 --> 00:16:30,120
Speaker 9: Just from the first two comments, I would like to

384
00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:34,280
Speaker 9: add some details. First, she's acting like normal to me, loving, caring,

385
00:16:34,320 --> 00:16:36,680
Speaker 9: and overall like the girl I fell in love with. Second,

386
00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:39,200
Speaker 9: this may seem a little arrogant, but if i'm may

387
00:16:39,560 --> 00:16:42,880
Speaker 9: solf blaze a little, I'm six or four, blonde, fit

388
00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:47,280
Speaker 9: from going to the gym for five years, love cooking, traveling,

389
00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:48,920
Speaker 9: and hanging with friends and family.

390
00:16:49,120 --> 00:16:52,160
Speaker 2: He's five eight, bald, not.

391
00:16:52,080 --> 00:16:54,640
Speaker 9: Really fat, but on the mora out of shape side,

392
00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:56,160
Speaker 9: and it's kind of a gamer.

393
00:16:56,960 --> 00:16:57,840
Speaker 5: Get him, get hi him.

394
00:16:57,880 --> 00:16:59,720
Speaker 2: He's like a he's like a jock or something.

395
00:16:59,760 --> 00:17:01,280
Speaker 5: He's like, Oh yeah, he's a nerd.

396
00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:02,920
Speaker 2: He's a freaking nerd.

397
00:17:03,160 --> 00:17:05,760
Speaker 9: I guess, and I mean computer games. So he only

398
00:17:05,760 --> 00:17:07,800
Speaker 9: has a handful of friends and the same at work.

399
00:17:08,080 --> 00:17:10,520
Speaker 9: I do not say this to bully him or belittle

400
00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:13,600
Speaker 9: him in any way. It's just straight facts. Third, my

401
00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:15,679
Speaker 9: girlfriend said that after meeting some of his friends at

402
00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:17,880
Speaker 9: a local get together. She said it felt weird being

403
00:17:17,960 --> 00:17:20,520
Speaker 9: so much younger than everyone at that specific table, that

404
00:17:20,600 --> 00:17:22,600
Speaker 9: she just kept it short when she said hi to them.

405
00:17:22,760 --> 00:17:25,080
Speaker 9: Final reason, if you put all this together, I can't

406
00:17:25,119 --> 00:17:27,880
Speaker 9: see any reason why I should have been suspicious earlier.

407
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:34,880
Speaker 9: And there is an update again, but there's a huge

408
00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:38,879
Speaker 9: dance that's probably lying. But if she is telling the

409
00:17:38,920 --> 00:17:42,160
Speaker 9: complete truth and she is not, you know, at all

410
00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:44,199
Speaker 9: interested in this guy and she really sees him as

411
00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:45,960
Speaker 9: a friend, that is.

412
00:17:45,840 --> 00:17:48,800
Speaker 2: Not how he sees her. Yep, Yep.

413
00:17:48,880 --> 00:17:52,960
Speaker 9: There is a ninety nine percent chance that this man

414
00:17:53,480 --> 00:17:57,560
Speaker 9: is being predatory toward this twenty year old girl by

415
00:17:57,560 --> 00:18:02,560
Speaker 9: inviting her over when she is his coworker, to watch

416
00:18:02,720 --> 00:18:05,120
Speaker 9: movies alone together.

417
00:18:05,680 --> 00:18:08,199
Speaker 6: This kind of feels like like his mindset towards this

418
00:18:08,320 --> 00:18:11,960
Speaker 6: kind of feels like when when guys don't when when

419
00:18:12,040 --> 00:18:14,439
Speaker 6: guys like ask women like why don't you travel alone?

420
00:18:14,520 --> 00:18:18,000
Speaker 2: Like yeah, you guys walk at night?

421
00:18:18,280 --> 00:18:18,720
Speaker 6: Yeah.

422
00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:19,040
Speaker 11: Yeah.

423
00:18:19,320 --> 00:18:24,240
Speaker 6: It's so it's like, uh no, no no.

424
00:18:24,280 --> 00:18:26,480
Speaker 4: And so it's like the fact that he's just like

425
00:18:26,640 --> 00:18:26,960
Speaker 4: I don't.

426
00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:29,720
Speaker 6: I don't think there was any reason not to test

427
00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:33,680
Speaker 6: him until now, what, Like well, so out of the yeah,

428
00:18:33,840 --> 00:18:36,440
Speaker 6: like you should have at least been worried this entire

429
00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:38,080
Speaker 6: time for sure, for sure.

430
00:18:39,040 --> 00:18:40,080
Speaker 2: Yeah.

431
00:18:40,359 --> 00:18:43,040
Speaker 9: Update, thanks for all the comments and d ms. There

432
00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:44,680
Speaker 9: is no way I can answer to all of them,

433
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:46,840
Speaker 9: so I will try to make an update now, as

434
00:18:46,880 --> 00:18:49,240
Speaker 9: I feel almost responsible to do it for the big

435
00:18:49,280 --> 00:18:53,600
Speaker 9: response from the community. She actually went through with it

436
00:18:53,680 --> 00:18:54,760
Speaker 9: the movie.

437
00:18:54,640 --> 00:18:58,520
Speaker 6: I'm guessing yeah, okay, earlier starting, I just want to

438
00:18:58,520 --> 00:18:59,320
Speaker 6: make that very.

439
00:18:59,119 --> 00:19:03,159
Speaker 4: Clear, to make clear he got fifty three seconds off

440
00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:03,359
Speaker 4: the top.

441
00:19:03,480 --> 00:19:04,200
Speaker 5: There's a torpedo me.

442
00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:05,440
Speaker 2: I'm gonna to write torpedo way.

443
00:19:05,760 --> 00:19:08,960
Speaker 9: Earlier today we sat down to discuss just how I

444
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:11,320
Speaker 9: felt about this whole thing. It is weird for her

445
00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:13,600
Speaker 9: to go alone home to him as he is effing

446
00:19:13,640 --> 00:19:16,800
Speaker 9: forty yeahm hmm. I was very clear about my opinion

447
00:19:16,880 --> 00:19:19,320
Speaker 9: about being excluded from this whole thing, and that it

448
00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:20,960
Speaker 9: is not all right for me to feel like I

449
00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:24,040
Speaker 9: am third wheeling my own relationship. Her answer, I did

450
00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:26,720
Speaker 9: not take you for such an insecure man after five

451
00:19:26,800 --> 00:19:27,479
Speaker 9: years together.

452
00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:30,840
Speaker 2: Mmmmmm all she's so oh my god.

453
00:19:31,359 --> 00:19:34,080
Speaker 9: Honestly, this kind of broke me. How is it okay

454
00:19:34,119 --> 00:19:36,199
Speaker 9: for her to just set my feelings aside with a

455
00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:39,080
Speaker 9: comment like that. I must admit I am absolutely not

456
00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:41,879
Speaker 9: the best with expressing my feelings in this kind of way,

457
00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:44,600
Speaker 9: and it feels very uncomfortable for me to open up

458
00:19:44,680 --> 00:19:47,600
Speaker 9: like that to someone, even if we have been together

459
00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:51,400
Speaker 9: for years, and I can kind of see why. When

460
00:19:51,480 --> 00:19:54,439
Speaker 9: that was her response after that one little comment, it

461
00:19:54,560 --> 00:19:58,280
Speaker 9: really sank in that she actually doesn't care about me anymore.

462
00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:00,760
Speaker 9: The rest of the conversation went down hill from there on.

463
00:20:00,920 --> 00:20:03,480
Speaker 9: I started to accuse her of cheating. She started throwing

464
00:20:03,520 --> 00:20:06,040
Speaker 9: a nothing fit about how dare I accuse her of

465
00:20:06,080 --> 00:20:08,240
Speaker 9: things like that after five years together?

466
00:20:08,359 --> 00:20:09,720
Speaker 5: How I didn't trust her?

467
00:20:09,840 --> 00:20:13,680
Speaker 9: After about twenty minutes of this, I was honestly broken down,

468
00:20:13,920 --> 00:20:16,719
Speaker 9: so I just walked out, didn't say anything, just walked

469
00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:19,040
Speaker 9: I was out for about thirty minutes, just to try

470
00:20:19,080 --> 00:20:21,439
Speaker 9: and clear my head from this whole conversation. When I

471
00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:24,439
Speaker 9: came back, she was waiting for me with just one question,

472
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:26,680
Speaker 9: do you think I've cheated on you? I said, yes,

473
00:20:26,760 --> 00:20:29,639
Speaker 9: I really do, And then I did something stupid. I

474
00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:32,160
Speaker 9: showed her my first post to get my point across

475
00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:36,480
Speaker 9: even more that the things I'm feeling and thinking about

476
00:20:36,560 --> 00:20:39,919
Speaker 9: are they all around opinion in the comments. She was

477
00:20:40,040 --> 00:20:42,520
Speaker 9: stunned and silent for a bit, and I think she

478
00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:45,600
Speaker 9: actually kind of saw why I felt the way I did.

479
00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:49,840
Speaker 9: Her response after that I must go. Her response was,

480
00:20:49,920 --> 00:20:53,000
Speaker 9: I must go, I must go, I must go. The

481
00:20:53,040 --> 00:20:54,840
Speaker 9: forty year old is waiting to start the movie, and

482
00:20:54,880 --> 00:20:56,720
Speaker 9: I think we should have a small break from each.

483
00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:59,160
Speaker 6: Other, referring to him as the first Well, that might

484
00:20:59,160 --> 00:21:02,720
Speaker 6: have been, yeah.

485
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:05,720
Speaker 9: I'm sorry she went on a break with you? Huh,

486
00:21:05,800 --> 00:21:08,480
Speaker 9: right before going to see this forty year old man

487
00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:09,600
Speaker 9: that she's hanging out alone with.

488
00:21:10,359 --> 00:21:12,640
Speaker 4: Really, right, that's yeah, that's that's right.

489
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:16,880
Speaker 2: I don't like it. I don't day One.

490
00:21:16,720 --> 00:21:20,560
Speaker 9: Day she is going to realize when she is older

491
00:21:21,040 --> 00:21:24,479
Speaker 9: what is going on. But uh, she definitely doesn't realize

492
00:21:24,480 --> 00:21:24,880
Speaker 9: it now.

493
00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:28,359
Speaker 4: Oh gross, suh.

494
00:21:29,760 --> 00:21:33,080
Speaker 9: She went, she effing went to him after our fight?

495
00:21:33,520 --> 00:21:35,240
Speaker 9: Or what did I do? I went to my father

496
00:21:35,320 --> 00:21:38,000
Speaker 9: at his work and actually cried in his arms for

497
00:21:38,040 --> 00:21:40,800
Speaker 9: the first time in probably fifteen years. And now I'm

498
00:21:40,840 --> 00:21:42,880
Speaker 9: at home in bed, and I've talked to my landlord.

499
00:21:42,920 --> 00:21:44,879
Speaker 9: She's very understanding and said that I can take my

500
00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:47,640
Speaker 9: name off the lease anytime I want. What Now, I'm

501
00:21:47,680 --> 00:21:52,040
Speaker 9: in my bed feeling totally empty, numb, sick, furious, and

502
00:21:52,119 --> 00:21:53,840
Speaker 9: to be honest, I went kind of off the hook

503
00:21:53,840 --> 00:21:55,679
Speaker 9: when I came back from my dad. I threw some

504
00:21:55,760 --> 00:21:58,639
Speaker 9: crap on the floor, actually cut the networking cable in

505
00:21:58,680 --> 00:22:00,840
Speaker 9: the wall. As she is maintaining a blog that she's

506
00:22:00,960 --> 00:22:04,240
Speaker 9: very passionate about, I won't link it, so don't even ask, guys.

507
00:22:04,240 --> 00:22:07,040
Speaker 9: I don't want to give that pos more activity on it.

508
00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:10,600
Speaker 9: This update went probably just the way people expected it

509
00:22:10,640 --> 00:22:13,480
Speaker 9: to go, so I hope people are happy. My relationship

510
00:22:13,520 --> 00:22:16,320
Speaker 9: is probably one hundred percent over to spare me in

511
00:22:16,359 --> 00:22:19,520
Speaker 9: the future. But please, how can I come out on

512
00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:21,880
Speaker 9: top of this? I have to see both of them

513
00:22:21,880 --> 00:22:24,120
Speaker 9: on Monday when we get to work. I don't think

514
00:22:24,119 --> 00:22:27,080
Speaker 9: I can handle this, so please, advice is more than welcome.

515
00:22:27,359 --> 00:22:28,440
Speaker 9: Is he in a position of.

516
00:22:28,400 --> 00:22:31,760
Speaker 2: Power here in the in the workplace? Yeah? Because they

517
00:22:31,760 --> 00:22:32,920
Speaker 2: are coworker, is.

518
00:22:32,760 --> 00:22:34,840
Speaker 9: He Is he in a position of power or are

519
00:22:34,840 --> 00:22:37,880
Speaker 9: you guys kind of like the same same vibe.

520
00:22:38,280 --> 00:22:41,879
Speaker 4: I mean, if he's forty and she's twenty twenty one.

521
00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:45,640
Speaker 11: If he's in a position of power, even a grosser,

522
00:22:45,960 --> 00:22:49,840
Speaker 11: I'd walk over to hr yeah and say, hey, yeah,

523
00:22:50,119 --> 00:22:52,280
Speaker 11: you guys know what's going on.

524
00:22:55,480 --> 00:22:57,840
Speaker 9: I might do another update later on if I can

525
00:22:57,880 --> 00:23:00,000
Speaker 9: mentally go through this again. As for now, I literally

526
00:23:00,160 --> 00:23:02,760
Speaker 9: can't handle it. I am mentally breaking down as I

527
00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:05,439
Speaker 9: am writing this. At it I am now done with

528
00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:07,800
Speaker 9: my first day of job. After the incident and how

529
00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:09,840
Speaker 9: things played out this weekend, I think I will start

530
00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:12,320
Speaker 9: looking for a new job. So keep looking out for

531
00:23:12,320 --> 00:23:13,960
Speaker 9: part three of this crap show.

532
00:23:14,119 --> 00:23:15,000
Speaker 2: And there is a.

533
00:23:14,920 --> 00:23:18,960
Speaker 9: Second update, folks. Wow, any thoughts before we get into it.

534
00:23:19,160 --> 00:23:23,280
Speaker 12: Oh, that's just it kind of even if like there

535
00:23:23,480 --> 00:23:26,760
Speaker 12: wasn't anything going on between them, we know it's creepy,

536
00:23:26,800 --> 00:23:28,800
Speaker 12: we know it's that it just sucks that she's not

537
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:31,040
Speaker 12: like willing to fight for the relationship.

538
00:23:31,119 --> 00:23:32,800
Speaker 4: She's just kind of like, oh, you're just like suddenly

539
00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:33,720
Speaker 4: and scare okay.

540
00:23:33,440 --> 00:23:37,800
Speaker 6: By yeah, I mean she's twenty yeah, yeah, Like obviously

541
00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:40,440
Speaker 6: doesn't excuse it, but like very much like.

542
00:23:40,400 --> 00:23:42,600
Speaker 9: Twenty year old behavior. She's like, man, I don't care.

543
00:23:43,160 --> 00:23:44,359
Speaker 4: Yeah, but they've been.

544
00:23:44,240 --> 00:23:47,320
Speaker 6: Together for five years though, you know, I mean I

545
00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:49,919
Speaker 6: guess at twenty five years starting at fifty.

546
00:23:50,400 --> 00:23:53,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like again to excuse it.

547
00:23:53,240 --> 00:23:56,480
Speaker 9: But like this girl like clearly does not care about

548
00:23:56,480 --> 00:23:58,480
Speaker 9: this relationship, which.

549
00:23:58,400 --> 00:23:59,720
Speaker 2: Just is like what sucks.

550
00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:03,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's actually he's like, oh, what the heck was like.

551
00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:04,040
Speaker 2: His first look?

552
00:24:04,119 --> 00:24:05,879
Speaker 4: Yeah, to see someone that he really cares about.

553
00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:08,880
Speaker 6: Yeah, and she's just like, hey, bye bye, we're into

554
00:24:08,880 --> 00:24:10,080
Speaker 6: this forty year old Yeah.

555
00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:11,520
Speaker 5: No, I knew a lot of girls.

556
00:24:11,440 --> 00:24:13,080
Speaker 9: Like, not a lot, but like I knew a couple

557
00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:14,680
Speaker 9: of girls in college who like would go out on

558
00:24:14,760 --> 00:24:16,680
Speaker 9: dates with these like forty year old men at eighteen.

559
00:24:16,720 --> 00:24:21,080
Speaker 6: I'm scary, yeah, scary stuff yey, these forty year old

560
00:24:21,080 --> 00:24:21,880
Speaker 6: men look at it.

561
00:24:22,080 --> 00:24:23,960
Speaker 2: That's weird. Yeah, no, no, no, hole.

562
00:24:24,119 --> 00:24:25,000
Speaker 5: And there is an update.

563
00:24:25,359 --> 00:24:28,000
Speaker 9: Holy crab, thank you for the overwhelming response on my

564
00:24:28,040 --> 00:24:30,320
Speaker 9: little situation. If you can call it that, There was

565
00:24:30,400 --> 00:24:31,760
Speaker 9: no way in the heck that I will be able

566
00:24:31,840 --> 00:24:34,560
Speaker 9: to answer even the minority of the comments and dms,

567
00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:37,040
Speaker 9: So I will do my best update you guys, as

568
00:24:37,040 --> 00:24:38,879
Speaker 9: I really do think I almost owe it to you

569
00:24:38,960 --> 00:24:43,240
Speaker 9: after the incredible response, Well, where should I begin? When

570
00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:45,439
Speaker 9: I look back on my personal response to this, it

571
00:24:45,480 --> 00:24:48,040
Speaker 9: was really childish for me to start breaking stuff and

572
00:24:48,080 --> 00:24:50,879
Speaker 9: cutting wires like I was throwing a tantrum, which I

573
00:24:50,960 --> 00:24:53,720
Speaker 9: probably was. I have set out to replace the stuff

574
00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:56,439
Speaker 9: that was ours and the stuff that was mine doesn't

575
00:24:56,440 --> 00:24:58,960
Speaker 9: really matter, and the internet wire will be fixed tomorrow.

576
00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:01,600
Speaker 9: This has shown a a whole new side of me

577
00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:04,320
Speaker 9: that I didn't know existed. But honestly, can you really

578
00:25:04,359 --> 00:25:06,840
Speaker 9: blame me too hard for this? This has been hands

579
00:25:06,880 --> 00:25:09,480
Speaker 9: down the worst weekend in my life, and I was

580
00:25:09,520 --> 00:25:12,399
Speaker 9: actually surprised that I didn't really see any comment calling

581
00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:14,800
Speaker 9: me out on my BS behavior. Now on to the

582
00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:16,920
Speaker 9: rest of this. I left off when I was laying

583
00:25:16,920 --> 00:25:19,359
Speaker 9: in bed and typing out what happened on Friday. The

584
00:25:19,400 --> 00:25:22,080
Speaker 9: rest of that Friday, I did just that. I stayed

585
00:25:22,119 --> 00:25:23,639
Speaker 9: in bed for the rest of the night and it

586
00:25:23,680 --> 00:25:25,760
Speaker 9: could not sleep as I was just thinking about all

587
00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:28,600
Speaker 9: our memories and that we will never create new ones,

588
00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:30,879
Speaker 9: as well as I was thinking way too much about

589
00:25:30,880 --> 00:25:33,280
Speaker 9: what they probably were doing in another bed.

590
00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:36,119
Speaker 2: Oh oh oh.

591
00:25:35,960 --> 00:25:38,760
Speaker 4: But you can't do that. You can't and that's like

592
00:25:38,800 --> 00:25:40,399
Speaker 4: the worst part of the breakup. But you can't do

593
00:25:40,480 --> 00:25:41,080
Speaker 4: that to yourself.

594
00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:46,040
Speaker 9: On Saturday, I made a big mistake. I started to

595
00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:48,399
Speaker 9: drink that led me to go to a party, and

596
00:25:48,520 --> 00:25:51,479
Speaker 9: honestly I should have not done that because I was

597
00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:55,159
Speaker 9: we sted calling mine now ex and asked one last

598
00:25:55,200 --> 00:25:58,200
Speaker 9: time if it really was over for us, and indeed

599
00:25:58,560 --> 00:26:01,040
Speaker 9: she said, yes, this is what you should not drink

600
00:26:01,080 --> 00:26:04,000
Speaker 9: after something like this, because unlucky for me, one of

601
00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:06,680
Speaker 9: her closer friends was at that party and one thing

602
00:26:06,760 --> 00:26:09,280
Speaker 9: led to another and we ended up in bed together.

603
00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:10,560
Speaker 9: I did this only.

604
00:26:10,320 --> 00:26:16,560
Speaker 6: To make my ex mad, of course worse. Yeah, oh man.

605
00:26:16,600 --> 00:26:22,280
Speaker 9: Rough, that sets rough. You can't imagine my regret on Sunday.

606
00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:25,160
Speaker 9: I have never done anything like this before and we'll

607
00:26:25,200 --> 00:26:27,160
Speaker 9: never do it again. Oh And I said as much

608
00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:30,159
Speaker 9: to the friend and apologized profusely for using her for this.

609
00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:32,920
Speaker 9: She said it was okay and understood, but you can

610
00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:35,600
Speaker 9: see it hurt her more than she said. I feel

611
00:26:35,600 --> 00:26:37,679
Speaker 9: like the biggest a hole in the world, and I

612
00:26:37,720 --> 00:26:40,840
Speaker 9: can't even imagine how she feels. I really deserve all

613
00:26:40,880 --> 00:26:42,879
Speaker 9: the crap come in my way from you guys for this.

614
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:45,320
Speaker 9: After all that, I also felt as if I cheated

615
00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:48,080
Speaker 9: all my ex for doing this. I can't explain why

616
00:26:48,280 --> 00:26:51,080
Speaker 9: I just did, probably because I had spicy sleep with

617
00:26:51,080 --> 00:26:53,280
Speaker 9: someone else the day after we broke up a five

618
00:26:53,359 --> 00:26:56,080
Speaker 9: year relationship. The rest of Sunday, I was dwelling on

619
00:26:56,119 --> 00:26:59,000
Speaker 9: what I just did and absolutely despising that it is

620
00:26:59,080 --> 00:27:01,840
Speaker 9: Monday tomorrow and I'm actually feeling sick to just go

621
00:27:02,040 --> 00:27:05,520
Speaker 9: to work. Monday today came and it started probably the

622
00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:06,879
Speaker 9: worst way possible.

623
00:27:07,040 --> 00:27:09,919
Speaker 2: My ex and our colleague came to work in the.

624
00:27:09,800 --> 00:27:14,120
Speaker 6: Same car wait our colleague, so the so op worked

625
00:27:14,119 --> 00:27:14,600
Speaker 6: with them too.

626
00:27:14,680 --> 00:27:15,439
Speaker 2: They'll work together.

627
00:27:15,560 --> 00:27:18,560
Speaker 4: Oh I miss that. Oh it's just the girlfriend and

628
00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:19,560
Speaker 4: they all work together.

629
00:27:19,800 --> 00:27:22,199
Speaker 9: We're hearing and when I tell you, it felt like

630
00:27:22,240 --> 00:27:25,320
Speaker 9: the burning coal in my stomach became an absolutely all

631
00:27:25,400 --> 00:27:28,359
Speaker 9: developing black hole. I can't describe it better than that,

632
00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:30,000
Speaker 9: but being a man, I guess I just tried to

633
00:27:30,040 --> 00:27:33,000
Speaker 9: ignore it. I must not have been so convincing, because

634
00:27:33,000 --> 00:27:34,720
Speaker 9: she came right over to me and said that it's

635
00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:36,840
Speaker 9: not what it looks like. Actually, I had just pictured

636
00:27:36,920 --> 00:27:39,000
Speaker 9: up at our house. I have slept at my dad's

637
00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:41,159
Speaker 9: house from Sunday to Monday. This did not make me

638
00:27:41,200 --> 00:27:43,800
Speaker 9: feel any better or whatsoever, because how can I believe that?

639
00:27:44,040 --> 00:27:46,800
Speaker 9: But I did also apologize for my behavior from Friday

640
00:27:46,960 --> 00:27:50,080
Speaker 9: and that I had acted childish and immature. She said

641
00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:52,879
Speaker 9: it was okay and that it was understandable why I

642
00:27:52,920 --> 00:27:55,800
Speaker 9: did what I did. Then after that, the rest of

643
00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:58,399
Speaker 9: the day got even worse. If you can believe that,

644
00:27:58,640 --> 00:28:00,600
Speaker 9: some how the word of our break up had already

645
00:28:00,640 --> 00:28:03,679
Speaker 9: spread like wildfire. There you go at work, and to

646
00:28:03,760 --> 00:28:06,760
Speaker 9: my delight, apparently it was almost like an open secret

647
00:28:06,760 --> 00:28:09,200
Speaker 9: that my accent our colleague had hooked up at least

648
00:28:09,560 --> 00:28:13,639
Speaker 9: once before on a business party, once before before they

649
00:28:13,640 --> 00:28:15,440
Speaker 9: broke up, or just engine.

650
00:28:15,440 --> 00:28:19,840
Speaker 6: Oh wow, they freaking cheated of course, of course, Oh

651
00:28:19,880 --> 00:28:20,320
Speaker 6: my god.

652
00:28:20,359 --> 00:28:22,359
Speaker 9: I can't imagine that being an open secret and me

653
00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:23,440
Speaker 9: not like.

654
00:28:23,840 --> 00:28:25,360
Speaker 2: All your coworkers knowing more.

655
00:28:25,359 --> 00:28:27,919
Speaker 9: Do you rule in a twenty year old, Uh, like

656
00:28:28,720 --> 00:28:31,720
Speaker 9: this mat should be ostracized? Oh yeah, if he cannot be,

657
00:28:32,119 --> 00:28:36,400
Speaker 9: you know, freakin' written out like ostracized.

658
00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:37,280
Speaker 2: Yeah.

659
00:28:37,400 --> 00:28:38,480
Speaker 4: That was it for me today.

660
00:28:38,760 --> 00:28:40,960
Speaker 9: I called it, went to my boss, told him I

661
00:28:41,080 --> 00:28:43,240
Speaker 9: was sick, and went home. A couple of hours later,

662
00:28:43,360 --> 00:28:45,880
Speaker 9: I'm just sitting here trying to eat. It's not going

663
00:28:45,920 --> 00:28:48,080
Speaker 9: so well, and just thinking about how my colleagues at

664
00:28:48,080 --> 00:28:51,360
Speaker 9: work could hold such a secret from me. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

665
00:28:51,680 --> 00:28:55,200
Speaker 9: disgusting absolutely, and I can't even imagine continuing to work

666
00:28:55,240 --> 00:28:57,800
Speaker 9: here anymore. So I'm also sitting and looking for new

667
00:28:57,840 --> 00:29:00,200
Speaker 9: work as we speak. As it stands right now, I

668
00:29:00,200 --> 00:29:02,120
Speaker 9: have taken my name off the house lease and we'll

669
00:29:02,120 --> 00:29:04,840
Speaker 9: start to pack my stuff tomorrow to move out and

670
00:29:04,880 --> 00:29:07,520
Speaker 9: move in with my father in the meantime while I.

671
00:29:07,480 --> 00:29:10,280
Speaker 5: Find a new place. There is a little bit left

672
00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:11,240
Speaker 5: to this story.

673
00:29:11,960 --> 00:29:13,640
Speaker 2: Any final thoughts I.

674
00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:18,640
Speaker 4: Fell in loves are gross gross and then ews yuck, yuck.

675
00:29:19,080 --> 00:29:20,280
Speaker 2: I don't like it. I don't like it.

676
00:29:20,320 --> 00:29:25,400
Speaker 6: Everyone is being like ignoring the problem here very much,

677
00:29:25,440 --> 00:29:27,320
Speaker 6: and it's like, why what's going on?

678
00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:27,920
Speaker 11: Yeah?

679
00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:29,680
Speaker 9: I wonder if it's like a bunch of like older

680
00:29:29,720 --> 00:29:34,440
Speaker 9: men where oh yeah, ooh.

681
00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:37,360
Speaker 2: No, no, no, no enough.

682
00:29:38,040 --> 00:29:40,920
Speaker 9: But uh, folks, there's a little bit left to the story.

683
00:29:41,160 --> 00:29:44,120
Speaker 9: As with the last post, I do really appreciate some advice,

684
00:29:44,320 --> 00:29:46,120
Speaker 9: and this time I will try to be more active

685
00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:47,920
Speaker 9: when it comes to the comments and dms.

686
00:29:47,960 --> 00:29:48,440
Speaker 5: I'm all so.

687
00:29:48,440 --> 00:29:51,080
Speaker 2: Tired of hearing you're young, you'll find someone new.

688
00:29:51,720 --> 00:29:54,640
Speaker 9: My problem is I don't really want anyone else, so

689
00:29:54,720 --> 00:29:57,480
Speaker 9: what do people think about my current situation? The definition

690
00:29:57,520 --> 00:30:00,840
Speaker 9: of crap show edit. I've gotten tons messages that said

691
00:30:00,880 --> 00:30:03,840
Speaker 9: I was unbelievably childish about all my decisions, and I

692
00:30:03,920 --> 00:30:06,160
Speaker 9: know I was. Just call me out for being childish

693
00:30:06,240 --> 00:30:08,360
Speaker 9: is one thing, but please leave some advice or something

694
00:30:08,400 --> 00:30:10,120
Speaker 9: at least so I can take it as some sort

695
00:30:10,160 --> 00:30:11,160
Speaker 9: of helpful criticism.

696
00:30:12,200 --> 00:30:13,320
Speaker 5: Hey is John og host.

697
00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:14,840
Speaker 7: We're gonna get back to the stories, but a quick

698
00:30:14,840 --> 00:30:16,560
Speaker 7: three minute break of ads from our sponsors.

699
00:30:16,920 --> 00:30:21,200
Speaker 6: My husband accidentally confessed his affair. Now he doesn't remember

700
00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:26,720
Speaker 6: doing it. Awfully convenience. Yesterday, my husband decided to have

701
00:30:26,760 --> 00:30:29,000
Speaker 6: a barbecue and invite a few friends over to our house.

702
00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:31,960
Speaker 6: He grilled and I made the sides, and everything was great.

703
00:30:32,360 --> 00:30:35,680
Speaker 6: As the night proceeded, everyone had been drinking, listening to music,

704
00:30:35,760 --> 00:30:38,880
Speaker 6: and dancing around when suddenly my husband texted me and

705
00:30:38,960 --> 00:30:42,800
Speaker 6: asked me to have a By the way, this comes

706
00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:45,920
Speaker 6: from a throwaway capua and if you want to submit

707
00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:47,880
Speaker 6: your own stories, go to the our slash Okay story time.

708
00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:51,040
Speaker 6: Stub bred it so I was totally caught off garden.

709
00:30:51,160 --> 00:30:54,240
Speaker 6: He's asked before many years ago, and I declined because

710
00:30:54,280 --> 00:30:56,600
Speaker 6: my husband was my first and only, and I was

711
00:30:56,640 --> 00:30:58,000
Speaker 6: always happy with that fact.

712
00:30:58,120 --> 00:31:00,280
Speaker 4: He hadn't asked again until night.

713
00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:03,120
Speaker 6: He got really quiet after a few attempts of asking

714
00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:06,200
Speaker 6: via text and being denied. All of our friends were

715
00:31:06,280 --> 00:31:09,000
Speaker 6: still there, talking and laughing. He came over to talk

716
00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:11,240
Speaker 6: to me. He was really wasted at this point and

717
00:31:11,360 --> 00:31:14,560
Speaker 6: started telling me quietly about how he's a really bad

718
00:31:14,640 --> 00:31:16,280
Speaker 6: guy and that he loves.

719
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:21,640
Speaker 2: Me, but he's been bad. Okay, you okay. I'm like this.

720
00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:22,479
Speaker 4: I don't like it.

721
00:31:22,520 --> 00:31:24,960
Speaker 6: My heart started racing, but I kept my calm and

722
00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:26,960
Speaker 6: asked him what he was talking about. He told me

723
00:31:27,000 --> 00:31:28,920
Speaker 6: that he was at a bar recently and that he

724
00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:31,640
Speaker 6: ran into an acquaintance of mine, and she told him

725
00:31:31,640 --> 00:31:34,400
Speaker 6: that they couldn't hang because she was friends with my sister.

726
00:31:34,560 --> 00:31:37,160
Speaker 6: I found the phrasing odd and I questioned him, were

727
00:31:37,160 --> 00:31:39,400
Speaker 6: you trying to hang out with her? He said no,

728
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:42,040
Speaker 6: but was still acting like he had something else to say.

729
00:31:42,120 --> 00:31:45,320
Speaker 6: So I prope tip, is that how you've been bad?

730
00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:49,080
Speaker 6: He said no. I didn't know if I wanted him

731
00:31:49,120 --> 00:31:51,200
Speaker 6: to tell me or not. I'm just beassure him, being

732
00:31:51,240 --> 00:31:54,880
Speaker 6: like I've been bad, and she's like how, and he's.

733
00:31:54,720 --> 00:32:05,600
Speaker 13: Like yeah, he said no, but I didn't know if

734
00:32:05,640 --> 00:32:07,280
Speaker 13: I wanted him to tell me or not, but I

735
00:32:07,320 --> 00:32:08,040
Speaker 13: asked anyway.

736
00:32:08,080 --> 00:32:09,719
Speaker 6: He said he had been with the girl that he

737
00:32:09,840 --> 00:32:12,000
Speaker 6: used to work with at another job, and that she.

738
00:32:12,160 --> 00:32:15,280
Speaker 4: Was thirteen years younger than him, and.

739
00:32:15,280 --> 00:32:17,840
Speaker 2: Said that it had gone on for a while.

740
00:32:18,080 --> 00:32:18,400
Speaker 3: No.

741
00:32:19,440 --> 00:32:22,720
Speaker 6: I was shocked, but I kept my cool since everyone

742
00:32:22,760 --> 00:32:24,880
Speaker 6: was around and no one seemed to be aware that

743
00:32:24,920 --> 00:32:27,960
Speaker 6: our conversation had taken a serious turn. I laughed it off.

744
00:32:28,120 --> 00:32:29,800
Speaker 6: He asked me if I would still love him and

745
00:32:29,880 --> 00:32:31,960
Speaker 6: how I felt about it. He seemed to hint that

746
00:32:32,120 --> 00:32:34,360
Speaker 6: he wanted to be with her instead because he loved

747
00:32:34,360 --> 00:32:36,200
Speaker 6: her too, or both of us.

748
00:32:36,600 --> 00:32:38,680
Speaker 4: He seemed confused and incoherent.

749
00:32:38,840 --> 00:32:41,280
Speaker 6: I laughed again and told him that I wasn't discussing

750
00:32:41,280 --> 00:32:43,800
Speaker 6: this in front of everyone. The laughter was part nervous

751
00:32:43,840 --> 00:32:46,360
Speaker 6: and part hope that no one had noticed or overheard.

752
00:32:46,520 --> 00:32:48,840
Speaker 6: He went inside to the bathroom after that and fell

753
00:32:48,880 --> 00:32:51,640
Speaker 6: into the bathroom, taking down all the bath products and

754
00:32:51,640 --> 00:32:54,719
Speaker 6: shower curtains in the process. Then he vomited on himself

755
00:32:54,760 --> 00:32:57,240
Speaker 6: and the tub. Our friends left shortly after that. I

756
00:32:57,320 --> 00:33:00,320
Speaker 6: rinsed him off with the showerhead and laved him there,

757
00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:02,840
Speaker 6: and then he slept there until a few minutes ago.

758
00:33:03,640 --> 00:33:05,280
Speaker 6: I con checked on her throughout the night.

759
00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:07,760
Speaker 9: Okay, okay, now I want you guys to imagine this,

760
00:33:07,800 --> 00:33:10,440
Speaker 9: because I have it in my head. Opie's husband is

761
00:33:10,480 --> 00:33:13,760
Speaker 9: in the bathtub. He's just confessed to cheating on her.

762
00:33:14,080 --> 00:33:17,880
Speaker 9: She grabs the shower head, just goes hoosen dout because

763
00:33:17,880 --> 00:33:23,760
Speaker 9: hes him down on himself. She goes, Okay, yeah, I mean,

764
00:33:24,560 --> 00:33:27,440
Speaker 9: it's an honestly great place for him to be to

765
00:33:27,480 --> 00:33:29,640
Speaker 9: do that, truly very convenient.

766
00:33:29,720 --> 00:33:33,760
Speaker 4: Toh it off like you. But she has left him there.

767
00:33:34,200 --> 00:33:37,440
Speaker 6: Okay, he's fine, he'll be he'll survive, especially after he

768
00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:39,840
Speaker 6: just confessed that he has been cheatating on me with

769
00:33:39,880 --> 00:33:43,640
Speaker 6: a someone thirteen years younger. He has since gone to

770
00:33:43,640 --> 00:33:46,080
Speaker 6: sleep in our bed. Not a word spoken, but he

771
00:33:46,120 --> 00:33:48,360
Speaker 6: put his hand on my leg while I was in bed.

772
00:33:48,480 --> 00:33:51,520
Speaker 6: I got up and didn't say anything. We have two daughters.

773
00:33:51,960 --> 00:33:54,760
Speaker 6: I didn't see this coming, although I probably should have.

774
00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:56,840
Speaker 6: He is a good father, and I thought he was

775
00:33:56,880 --> 00:33:59,640
Speaker 6: a good husband. He was my first and only serious boyfriend,

776
00:33:59,640 --> 00:34:01,960
Speaker 6: and we got married at twenty three and twenty seven.

777
00:34:02,120 --> 00:34:04,840
Speaker 6: I've never been on my own. I don't know what

778
00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:08,239
Speaker 6: to do. I love him and we do have an update.

779
00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:11,600
Speaker 6: Oh boy, Well, if.

780
00:34:11,400 --> 00:34:14,080
Speaker 9: This was your first boyfriend, there's gonna be way better

781
00:34:14,160 --> 00:34:16,960
Speaker 9: options than the guy that cheated on you. Like, yes,

782
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:20,919
Speaker 9: you have a child or children, two children, and yeah

783
00:34:20,960 --> 00:34:23,200
Speaker 9: you should find a way too, like cope, Aaron, But

784
00:34:23,239 --> 00:34:26,560
Speaker 9: this guy told you because he was drunk, like didn't

785
00:34:26,719 --> 00:34:29,520
Speaker 9: never confess to it. Yeah, has been going on for

786
00:34:29,640 --> 00:34:31,439
Speaker 9: It's not a one time thing. This has been going

787
00:34:31,480 --> 00:34:34,040
Speaker 9: on for a while. And also I don't know, I'm

788
00:34:34,040 --> 00:34:36,120
Speaker 9: like ready to get into what this title is about,

789
00:34:36,160 --> 00:34:38,600
Speaker 9: because yeah, exactly, I feel like he's just not gonna

790
00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:40,560
Speaker 9: remember telling her, Oh.

791
00:34:40,520 --> 00:34:41,000
Speaker 2: Yeah about it.

792
00:34:41,040 --> 00:34:43,400
Speaker 6: I mean if he if you forgot it in the bathtub,

793
00:34:43,480 --> 00:34:46,480
Speaker 6: if you forgot about the whole affair, a little more.

794
00:34:46,320 --> 00:34:49,960
Speaker 9: Problematic because I think this guy is amnesia. But I

795
00:34:50,000 --> 00:34:52,600
Speaker 9: feel like you just forgot telling the confession. But there

796
00:34:52,640 --> 00:34:55,160
Speaker 9: is nothing, so let's find out. My husband slept until

797
00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:57,680
Speaker 9: one pm. He works nights. He is scheduled to go

798
00:34:57,719 --> 00:34:59,680
Speaker 9: to work at two thirty pm. I was sitting on

799
00:34:59,800 --> 00:35:01,759
Speaker 9: the living room couch when he walked into the room.

800
00:35:01,840 --> 00:35:05,120
Speaker 9: It took everything not to start yelling and screaming immediately

801
00:35:05,280 --> 00:35:06,040
Speaker 9: he walked into.

802
00:35:05,920 --> 00:35:08,080
Speaker 6: The kitchen, made something to eat and asked if I

803
00:35:08,160 --> 00:35:10,440
Speaker 6: was okay. I was like, great, he doesn't remember.

804
00:35:10,600 --> 00:35:12,360
Speaker 2: That made me burst into tears.

805
00:35:12,560 --> 00:35:15,000
Speaker 4: I said, you don't remember what you said? And no

806
00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:16,120
Speaker 4: was his answer.

807
00:35:16,440 --> 00:35:18,560
Speaker 6: I reminded him of what he had told me that night,

808
00:35:18,680 --> 00:35:21,200
Speaker 6: and he tried to deny it, but not for long.

809
00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:24,200
Speaker 6: He eventually admitted to the affair. He said he had

810
00:35:24,239 --> 00:35:27,080
Speaker 6: been with this one person on and off for some time.

811
00:35:27,280 --> 00:35:30,160
Speaker 6: I was speechless. I asked why he would ever do

812
00:35:30,239 --> 00:35:32,400
Speaker 6: that to me, and he didn't really have an answer.

813
00:35:32,520 --> 00:35:36,480
Speaker 6: I don't want a cheating, lying, wasted man as my husband.

814
00:35:36,560 --> 00:35:39,080
Speaker 6: But the first thing I said was you need to

815
00:35:39,120 --> 00:35:41,279
Speaker 6: decide if you want to stay married and stay under

816
00:35:41,280 --> 00:35:43,080
Speaker 6: my conditions, or if you want to.

817
00:35:43,080 --> 00:35:44,000
Speaker 2: Leave to be with her.

818
00:35:44,280 --> 00:35:46,880
Speaker 6: He sat there quietly while I laid down some of

819
00:35:46,920 --> 00:35:50,279
Speaker 6: your suggestions, which I didn't believe that he would agree to.

820
00:35:50,560 --> 00:35:52,279
Speaker 2: Who was suggesting that you stay with him?

821
00:35:52,600 --> 00:35:53,080
Speaker 4: I don't know.

822
00:35:53,239 --> 00:35:56,040
Speaker 6: I mean, I don't know if that was necessarily I mean,

823
00:35:56,200 --> 00:35:57,880
Speaker 6: it looks like there were some comments in between the

824
00:35:57,960 --> 00:36:01,640
Speaker 6: updates that maybe had like some boundaries suggested.

825
00:36:01,719 --> 00:36:02,160
Speaker 2: But I don't know.

826
00:36:02,200 --> 00:36:05,560
Speaker 6: If people just sheat it stayed, it could just be

827
00:36:05,640 --> 00:36:08,400
Speaker 6: a thing where it was like a like a desperate

828
00:36:08,520 --> 00:36:10,800
Speaker 6: kind of thing, like like like, oh, she like knows

829
00:36:10,800 --> 00:36:14,040
Speaker 6: she shouldn't say knows, but like she she just said

830
00:36:14,040 --> 00:36:15,719
Speaker 6: it because she's been married to this person.

831
00:36:15,840 --> 00:36:18,280
Speaker 4: Sure, and they have kids and two kids.

832
00:36:18,360 --> 00:36:19,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, so true.

833
00:36:19,640 --> 00:36:22,160
Speaker 6: I told him for me to try and work this out.

834
00:36:22,320 --> 00:36:25,520
Speaker 6: You will provide access to all text messages, emails, credit

835
00:36:25,520 --> 00:36:28,920
Speaker 6: card statements, and social media. We will attend marriage counseling

836
00:36:28,960 --> 00:36:31,920
Speaker 6: and individual counseling. You will lose all privacy and freedom

837
00:36:31,920 --> 00:36:34,680
Speaker 6: to be out and about example of bars, fishing, hanging

838
00:36:34,719 --> 00:36:37,040
Speaker 6: out with guy friends, et cetera. You will provide a

839
00:36:37,080 --> 00:36:40,440
Speaker 6: record of time sheets and will be subjected to my skepticism.

840
00:36:40,520 --> 00:36:42,880
Speaker 4: Twenty four to seven. You will have an STD test.

841
00:36:43,040 --> 00:36:45,319
Speaker 6: I will be a witch and this marriage it may

842
00:36:45,320 --> 00:36:48,080
Speaker 6: seem worse before it gets better. Work and home will

843
00:36:48,120 --> 00:36:50,720
Speaker 6: be your life now unless you are taking our children somewhere.

844
00:36:50,800 --> 00:36:53,440
Speaker 6: You can choose this, or you can leave. I didn't

845
00:36:53,440 --> 00:36:55,520
Speaker 6: really know what I wanted him to say. He sat

846
00:36:55,520 --> 00:36:58,200
Speaker 6: there for thirty minutes and didn't say anything. Then he said,

847
00:36:58,480 --> 00:37:01,000
Speaker 6: I don't want to be with anyone. I knew this

848
00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:03,880
Speaker 6: was the most likely answer, and I said fine. He

849
00:37:03,960 --> 00:37:05,960
Speaker 6: left for work and I cried for a few minutes

850
00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:08,920
Speaker 6: and started reading the advice from a few websites recommended

851
00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:11,359
Speaker 6: in the comments. He texted me about an hour later

852
00:37:11,440 --> 00:37:14,719
Speaker 6: and apologized for being a crappy husband. I said, you

853
00:37:14,760 --> 00:37:17,360
Speaker 6: don't feel bad if it went on that long. He

854
00:37:17,400 --> 00:37:19,239
Speaker 6: asked if it was okay to come and get some

855
00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:23,239
Speaker 6: of his things, and I said fine, wow, wow, So

856
00:37:23,400 --> 00:37:27,640
Speaker 6: he just he just left. He's just no one, not

857
00:37:27,800 --> 00:37:31,279
Speaker 6: her or you, which is probably the best for both them.

858
00:37:31,440 --> 00:37:31,920
Speaker 2: Honestly.

859
00:37:32,239 --> 00:37:35,040
Speaker 9: Yeah, I mean like it's it's gonna seem off like

860
00:37:35,320 --> 00:37:38,200
Speaker 9: it sucks. I mean it does suck, okay, but sure, honestly,

861
00:37:38,200 --> 00:37:39,120
Speaker 9: he's doing you a favor.

862
00:37:39,680 --> 00:37:42,160
Speaker 6: Yeah, you don't have to like just keep going through

863
00:37:42,160 --> 00:37:45,680
Speaker 6: a grueling trial period if it can work out, which.

864
00:37:46,239 --> 00:37:50,360
Speaker 9: He's showing you that he's already has shown you that

865
00:37:50,400 --> 00:37:53,400
Speaker 9: he is not willing to work for this relationship. Yeah,

866
00:37:53,440 --> 00:37:56,839
Speaker 9: and he's definitely showing you now exactly.

867
00:37:57,000 --> 00:37:59,200
Speaker 6: He came home in his regular off time two am

868
00:37:59,239 --> 00:38:00,560
Speaker 6: and started getting few things.

869
00:38:00,719 --> 00:38:02,480
Speaker 2: I woke up and asked if he got a place.

870
00:38:02,560 --> 00:38:03,120
Speaker 2: He said yes.

871
00:38:03,239 --> 00:38:04,759
Speaker 6: I asked if he would come to the house on

872
00:38:04,800 --> 00:38:06,600
Speaker 6: Thursday to watch the girls on his day off. He

873
00:38:06,640 --> 00:38:08,759
Speaker 6: said okay. I felt like he was dragging his feet

874
00:38:08,760 --> 00:38:10,960
Speaker 6: about leaving. I asked if he had thought any more

875
00:38:11,000 --> 00:38:12,880
Speaker 6: about what I said. He asked me if I would

876
00:38:12,880 --> 00:38:15,439
Speaker 6: really let him stay, and I said, only under those

877
00:38:15,480 --> 00:38:16,960
Speaker 6: previously mentioned conditions.

878
00:38:17,040 --> 00:38:19,920
Speaker 4: I will not give on one of my stipulations.

879
00:38:20,000 --> 00:38:21,640
Speaker 2: He sat down. I said, don't.

880
00:38:21,440 --> 00:38:22,240
Speaker 4: Stay for the kids.

881
00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:24,360
Speaker 6: Stay because you want to be with me, don't stay

882
00:38:24,400 --> 00:38:26,719
Speaker 6: because you feel guilty, and he sat there. I asked

883
00:38:26,800 --> 00:38:29,400
Speaker 6: him to leave because I needed to sleep, and just

884
00:38:29,560 --> 00:38:31,280
Speaker 6: he said, I'll stay.

885
00:38:31,600 --> 00:38:34,000
Speaker 2: Oh, so back in.

886
00:38:34,480 --> 00:38:34,560
Speaker 3: No.

887
00:38:36,600 --> 00:38:40,040
Speaker 6: I feel like he needs to think about that. I

888
00:38:40,040 --> 00:38:42,000
Speaker 6: feel like he needs to think about that. I feel

889
00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:45,560
Speaker 6: like he's just thinking about like I gotta tell tonight. Yeah,

890
00:38:45,560 --> 00:38:49,880
Speaker 6: I can tell, yeah, I'll stay.

891
00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:50,560
Speaker 2: Yeah. Sure.

892
00:38:50,600 --> 00:38:53,839
Speaker 9: He's like, well, it's not because I feel guilty. Yeah,

893
00:38:53,960 --> 00:38:56,320
Speaker 9: it's not because I'm staying for the kids.

894
00:38:56,960 --> 00:39:01,040
Speaker 6: It's just the bed. Yeah, the memory fill mattress. I

895
00:39:01,040 --> 00:39:03,680
Speaker 6: sput a lot of money on that thing. I don't

896
00:39:03,719 --> 00:39:06,080
Speaker 6: know what to say. I repeated everything I mentioned before.

897
00:39:06,239 --> 00:39:08,640
Speaker 6: He said that's what he needs. I said, okay, to

898
00:39:08,719 --> 00:39:10,640
Speaker 6: prove to me that you mean it, give me your.

899
00:39:10,480 --> 00:39:11,399
Speaker 4: Phone and he did.

900
00:39:11,480 --> 00:39:14,160
Speaker 6: There they were the texts from her uh don't read

901
00:39:14,200 --> 00:39:16,520
Speaker 6: them will be I read through some of them, afraid

902
00:39:16,560 --> 00:39:18,839
Speaker 6: of what I might find. I stopped reading and told

903
00:39:18,880 --> 00:39:20,759
Speaker 6: him to text her right then and there that it

904
00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:23,239
Speaker 6: was over. He texted, this is the last text you'll

905
00:39:23,280 --> 00:39:25,840
Speaker 6: receive from me. I want to work on my marriage.

906
00:39:25,920 --> 00:39:28,200
Speaker 6: She ended up messaging him on Facebook asking if it

907
00:39:28,239 --> 00:39:28,839
Speaker 6: was really him.

908
00:39:29,280 --> 00:39:29,879
Speaker 2: He said yes.

909
00:39:30,560 --> 00:39:33,240
Speaker 4: She said, good luck working on your fake.

910
00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:35,400
Speaker 6: Marriage a hole, and I told him that he was

911
00:39:35,440 --> 00:39:37,880
Speaker 6: sleeping on the couch. She sent a few messages this

912
00:39:37,920 --> 00:39:40,680
Speaker 6: morning about how she guesses that she was just some

913
00:39:40,960 --> 00:39:43,160
Speaker 6: side chick and he didn't really care about her, and

914
00:39:43,239 --> 00:39:45,839
Speaker 6: she hopes that she's not pregnant. It could be years

915
00:39:45,880 --> 00:39:48,720
Speaker 6: before I could trust him again. I've invested fourteen years

916
00:39:48,719 --> 00:39:51,720
Speaker 6: of my life for dating and engaged in ten married.

917
00:39:51,840 --> 00:39:55,160
Speaker 6: He doesn't drink every day or get falling down wasted off,

918
00:39:55,160 --> 00:39:57,520
Speaker 6: and this has occurred once or twice a year since.

919
00:39:57,400 --> 00:39:58,000
Speaker 2: We've been married.

920
00:39:58,080 --> 00:40:01,480
Speaker 6: He's not violent and not a substance us random substance

921
00:40:01,600 --> 00:40:04,000
Speaker 6: testing at work. He has a good work ethic and

922
00:40:04,040 --> 00:40:06,359
Speaker 6: has always provided well for our family. I don't know

923
00:40:06,400 --> 00:40:07,960
Speaker 6: if I want to work it out. What I have

924
00:40:08,080 --> 00:40:10,279
Speaker 6: managed to do this morning is to get proof of

925
00:40:10,320 --> 00:40:13,120
Speaker 6: his messages. I took screenshots while he was sleeping and

926
00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:16,760
Speaker 6: sent them to myself. Apparently she wanted to get pregnant.

927
00:40:16,920 --> 00:40:20,439
Speaker 6: That's definitely a deal breaker. Transparency or not. I guess

928
00:40:20,440 --> 00:40:23,920
Speaker 6: I'll find out soon enough. Dang, she she wanted to

929
00:40:23,920 --> 00:40:27,600
Speaker 6: get pregnant. So I'm confused what like she knew about

930
00:40:27,600 --> 00:40:30,000
Speaker 6: this situation. Seems like she knew that he was married

931
00:40:30,440 --> 00:40:33,040
Speaker 6: and just she just wanted to get pregnant from some guy.

932
00:40:33,280 --> 00:40:35,600
Speaker 9: Yeah, because I mean she even said like, good luck

933
00:40:35,640 --> 00:40:37,160
Speaker 9: with her fake marriage, fake marriage.

934
00:40:37,239 --> 00:40:37,600
Speaker 2: Yeah.

935
00:40:37,640 --> 00:40:39,520
Speaker 9: Like I don't think she was saying like, oh, you're

936
00:40:39,600 --> 00:40:42,120
Speaker 9: lying to me, there's no marriage, yeah, and like oh

937
00:40:42,160 --> 00:40:44,959
Speaker 9: you're you know that your marriage is not working right, right,

938
00:40:45,000 --> 00:40:46,320
Speaker 9: you'll come crawling back to me.

939
00:40:46,520 --> 00:40:49,120
Speaker 4: Boy, oh boy, oh boy.

940
00:40:49,320 --> 00:40:51,200
Speaker 2: My plan is to get my ducks in order.

941
00:40:51,200 --> 00:40:54,320
Speaker 6: I researched some local attorneys and found many do private,

942
00:40:54,360 --> 00:40:57,520
Speaker 6: free consultations. I work and make a decent salary, but

943
00:40:57,600 --> 00:40:59,719
Speaker 6: his salary is almost double what I make. I would

944
00:40:59,719 --> 00:41:02,520
Speaker 6: cover bills, but barely. I'm going to get my own

945
00:41:02,560 --> 00:41:05,280
Speaker 6: credit card. I'm going to pay down my debts faster

946
00:41:05,520 --> 00:41:07,080
Speaker 6: and prepare for a life on my own.

947
00:41:07,200 --> 00:41:09,160
Speaker 2: It sounds like she's preparing to leave him.

948
00:41:10,080 --> 00:41:12,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, So she's preparing for a life on her own.

949
00:41:12,120 --> 00:41:14,239
Speaker 6: Yeah yeah, yeah, But there is a little bit more

950
00:41:14,280 --> 00:41:14,960
Speaker 6: to the story.

951
00:41:15,360 --> 00:41:19,319
Speaker 4: But yeah, I think that's good that she's she's trying

952
00:41:19,360 --> 00:41:20,080
Speaker 4: to get out of there.

953
00:41:20,320 --> 00:41:24,280
Speaker 9: Yeah. Absolutely, I do not think this man like regardless

954
00:41:24,280 --> 00:41:27,120
Speaker 9: of what he says, he sounds like such a liar like.

955
00:41:27,160 --> 00:41:28,920
Speaker 9: He does not sound like he is the type of

956
00:41:28,920 --> 00:41:32,600
Speaker 9: person to actually want to commit to the boundaries.

957
00:41:32,120 --> 00:41:35,960
Speaker 4: That you've put in place. Yeah, that sucks, like it.

958
00:41:36,360 --> 00:41:36,759
Speaker 4: She said.

959
00:41:37,000 --> 00:41:39,920
Speaker 6: They've been together for fourteen years, married for ten, so

960
00:41:39,920 --> 00:41:43,319
Speaker 6: they probably just had their ten year anniversary this year,

961
00:41:44,520 --> 00:41:49,960
Speaker 6: and she is Oh, man, that's terrible, terrible, But there

962
00:41:50,000 --> 00:41:50,120
Speaker 6: is a.

963
00:41:50,080 --> 00:41:51,040
Speaker 2: Little bit more to the story.

964
00:41:51,200 --> 00:41:54,080
Speaker 6: I have scheduled an appointment with my doctor for STD testing.

965
00:41:54,160 --> 00:41:56,879
Speaker 6: Thanks for that suggestion. Things are really wide open at

966
00:41:56,880 --> 00:41:59,680
Speaker 6: this moment. I'm on the fence. I'm not really sure

967
00:41:59,719 --> 00:42:01,759
Speaker 6: what I do, but at least I have a little

968
00:42:01,800 --> 00:42:03,560
Speaker 6: more time to think about it. Thank you all so

969
00:42:03,719 --> 00:42:06,120
Speaker 6: much for all of the genuine advice and your sympathy.

970
00:42:06,200 --> 00:42:09,279
Speaker 6: I appreciate the links just to the support forums. I

971
00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:12,080
Speaker 6: have been reading them. Whatever I decide, I know many

972
00:42:12,080 --> 00:42:14,279
Speaker 6: of you will not agree with my choice. It's just

973
00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:17,520
Speaker 6: that my choice. As many of you have made clear,

974
00:42:17,760 --> 00:42:20,279
Speaker 6: I'm not a quitter and I'm also not going to

975
00:42:20,320 --> 00:42:22,160
Speaker 6: allow myself to be hung out to dry.

976
00:42:22,360 --> 00:42:24,320
Speaker 2: And that is the end of that story.

977
00:42:24,600 --> 00:42:27,280
Speaker 5: Dang e dang.

978
00:42:28,320 --> 00:42:30,160
Speaker 1: Hey, it's Sam. We're gonna get back to the stories.

979
00:42:30,160 --> 00:42:31,920
Speaker 1: But here's three minutes bads from our sponsors.

980
00:42:32,520 --> 00:42:36,160
Speaker 10: My fiance's sister created drama over my engagement ring.

981
00:42:36,360 --> 00:42:38,560
Speaker 2: Now I'm worried about my marriage.

982
00:42:38,680 --> 00:42:41,759
Speaker 5: She liked it too much because that ring was on it.

983
00:42:41,960 --> 00:42:45,239
Speaker 10: I've been with my fiance, Michael for almost four years now,

984
00:42:45,280 --> 00:42:47,520
Speaker 10: and it's been a great relationship so far. He's proposed

985
00:42:47,520 --> 00:42:49,919
Speaker 10: a month ago, and we're both really excited to start

986
00:42:49,920 --> 00:42:54,719
Speaker 10: our lives together. He's truly wonderful. His family well, by

987
00:42:54,760 --> 00:42:57,160
Speaker 10: the way, this comes from a ring drama thirty four

988
00:42:57,200 --> 00:42:58,640
Speaker 10: and if you don't submit your own stories, got all

989
00:42:58,640 --> 00:43:01,719
Speaker 10: our Slasha, Okay, storytime subber So. Michael does not live

990
00:43:01,760 --> 00:43:03,960
Speaker 10: in the same state as his family anymore, and as

991
00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:06,720
Speaker 10: a result, I've only met his family a few times.

992
00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:09,560
Speaker 10: As he said before that some of his family members

993
00:43:09,560 --> 00:43:12,319
Speaker 10: can be weird. He was even hesitant for me to

994
00:43:12,360 --> 00:43:16,880
Speaker 10: meet his siblings. His siblings, both girls are apparently really spoiled,

995
00:43:17,120 --> 00:43:20,719
Speaker 10: rotten individuals. Neither of the girls ever had to work

996
00:43:20,760 --> 00:43:24,240
Speaker 10: while growing up, and heavily relied on their parents' money.

997
00:43:24,400 --> 00:43:28,080
Speaker 10: Their parents treated them like royal parentcesses. Michael, on the

998
00:43:28,080 --> 00:43:30,160
Speaker 10: other hand, was expected to work from the age of

999
00:43:30,160 --> 00:43:32,879
Speaker 10: fourteen and go to school and chief far more four

1000
00:43:32,880 --> 00:43:35,560
Speaker 10: point zero GPA, being at least two clubs and two

1001
00:43:35,640 --> 00:43:39,200
Speaker 10: sports than was expected of his sisters, who were required

1002
00:43:39,239 --> 00:43:41,680
Speaker 10: to make sees and did nothing more.

1003
00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:44,080
Speaker 2: Michael was rarely allowed.

1004
00:43:43,719 --> 00:43:47,120
Speaker 10: To attend social events at school or go out on weekends.

1005
00:43:47,160 --> 00:43:49,719
Speaker 10: He did all the chores, and his parents treated him

1006
00:43:50,040 --> 00:43:53,960
Speaker 10: very differently than his sister. His sisters were incredibly mean

1007
00:43:53,960 --> 00:43:56,680
Speaker 10: to him as teenagers. Basically, he was pushed around like

1008
00:43:56,719 --> 00:43:59,279
Speaker 10: a literal peasant until he had enough money to move

1009
00:43:59,320 --> 00:44:01,719
Speaker 10: out and was able to receive grants and scholarships to

1010
00:44:01,760 --> 00:44:03,400
Speaker 10: go to school. It was a lot of luck that

1011
00:44:03,440 --> 00:44:06,040
Speaker 10: played a part of him being able to attend undergrad

1012
00:44:06,080 --> 00:44:09,120
Speaker 10: and grad school. If not for outside help, I believe

1013
00:44:09,120 --> 00:44:12,400
Speaker 10: his family would have left him to rot whilst giving

1014
00:44:12,440 --> 00:44:16,120
Speaker 10: the sisters everything they've ever wanted. Michael is now an engineer,

1015
00:44:16,160 --> 00:44:19,839
Speaker 10: while his sisters have basic minimum wage jobs. Nothing's wrong

1016
00:44:19,880 --> 00:44:22,480
Speaker 10: with that. However, his sisters have done all they can

1017
00:44:22,520 --> 00:44:26,239
Speaker 10: do to pastor Michael about borrowing money. Here we go,

1018
00:44:26,360 --> 00:44:29,439
Speaker 10: here's the issue, making him feel ashamed that he makes

1019
00:44:29,440 --> 00:44:31,439
Speaker 10: more money than they do, and even going as far

1020
00:44:31,520 --> 00:44:34,560
Speaker 10: as a claim they deserve the money more than Michael does.

1021
00:44:34,640 --> 00:44:38,120
Speaker 10: They ask him monthly for money, which I just learned

1022
00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:40,960
Speaker 10: a year ago after Michael confessed to me in shame

1023
00:44:41,120 --> 00:44:43,880
Speaker 10: that he'd be giving them money to help them through.

1024
00:44:43,760 --> 00:44:46,520
Speaker 2: A rough patch for the past few months.

1025
00:44:46,560 --> 00:44:49,200
Speaker 10: Apparently their mom and dad have refused to continue to

1026
00:44:49,239 --> 00:44:51,839
Speaker 10: support them to the large extent that they have been

1027
00:44:51,920 --> 00:44:54,719
Speaker 10: for the past several years. Maybe they finally got fed up,

1028
00:44:54,760 --> 00:44:58,000
Speaker 10: who knows, and now the sisters are looking to Michael. Tina,

1029
00:44:58,320 --> 00:45:02,520
Speaker 10: Michael's eldest sister, is really being difficult lately. Apparently she

1030
00:45:02,600 --> 00:45:05,400
Speaker 10: is bitter that Michael has not been giving her any

1031
00:45:05,480 --> 00:45:09,600
Speaker 10: more money, and she is acting very strange about Michael's engagement.

1032
00:45:09,719 --> 00:45:14,000
Speaker 10: Apparently Michael should be thinking about his family first before

1033
00:45:14,040 --> 00:45:16,719
Speaker 10: thinking of getting married and spending a bunch of money

1034
00:45:16,719 --> 00:45:19,160
Speaker 10: on a wedding and a wife. Now, supposedly she has

1035
00:45:19,239 --> 00:45:23,120
Speaker 10: pissed over my engagement ring. This past weekend, Michael and

1036
00:45:23,160 --> 00:45:25,600
Speaker 10: I went to visit the family, and Tina and the

1037
00:45:25,640 --> 00:45:29,200
Speaker 10: whole family obviously learned about our recent engagement. I had

1038
00:45:29,239 --> 00:45:32,600
Speaker 10: never met Michael's dad before because he travels so much

1039
00:45:32,600 --> 00:45:35,000
Speaker 10: for work. His mom seems passive towards me, and his

1040
00:45:35,120 --> 00:45:38,399
Speaker 10: dad kept asking me what my name was. It made

1041
00:45:38,400 --> 00:45:40,640
Speaker 10: me so sad, to be honest, Tina remarked on the

1042
00:45:40,760 --> 00:45:43,439
Speaker 10: large size of my engagement ring. Later in the day,

1043
00:45:43,520 --> 00:45:46,160
Speaker 10: she pulled Michael aside and told him she was really

1044
00:45:46,200 --> 00:45:50,120
Speaker 10: suffering financially along with the rest of Michael's family, and

1045
00:45:50,320 --> 00:45:53,840
Speaker 10: basically said she was shocked Michael was forking over thousands

1046
00:45:53,920 --> 00:45:57,400
Speaker 10: of dollars from my engagement ring and the wedding rather

1047
00:45:57,680 --> 00:46:00,720
Speaker 10: than help out his own family. She said, You've only

1048
00:46:00,760 --> 00:46:03,440
Speaker 10: known this chick for what a few years? You were

1049
00:46:03,520 --> 00:46:08,480
Speaker 10: already giving her everything while you give your family nothing. Well,

1050
00:46:08,520 --> 00:46:12,720
Speaker 10: Michael then informed her that my ring wasn't a real diamond.

1051
00:46:12,760 --> 00:46:17,480
Speaker 10: It is masonite, which I specifically wanted instead of a diamond.

1052
00:46:17,560 --> 00:46:20,799
Speaker 10: Michael could easily afford a diamond, but we're saving our

1053
00:46:20,840 --> 00:46:22,800
Speaker 10: money and I liked the idea of a massite. But

1054
00:46:22,880 --> 00:46:26,200
Speaker 10: Tina didn't believe that, and he expressed such. She stalked

1055
00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:28,560
Speaker 10: over me in the kitchen and made a huge scene

1056
00:46:28,600 --> 00:46:31,360
Speaker 10: in front of everyone, asking to see my ring and

1057
00:46:31,480 --> 00:46:33,719
Speaker 10: examine it because apparently she has a lab in her

1058
00:46:33,760 --> 00:46:34,359
Speaker 10: kitchen or something.

1059
00:46:34,400 --> 00:46:36,239
Speaker 5: I would like to examine your ring.

1060
00:46:36,400 --> 00:46:38,719
Speaker 10: She tried to play it off jokingly, but I could

1061
00:46:38,719 --> 00:46:40,920
Speaker 10: see through it, and at one point she grabbed for

1062
00:46:41,040 --> 00:46:43,560
Speaker 10: my left hand and I refused to hand over my ring,

1063
00:46:43,719 --> 00:46:47,440
Speaker 10: and Tina got emotional. The other sister, Hannah, soon buttoned

1064
00:46:47,440 --> 00:46:50,600
Speaker 10: in and asked what my problem was. Tina just wanted

1065
00:46:50,600 --> 00:46:53,400
Speaker 10: to look, what do I have to hide, et cetera.

1066
00:46:53,640 --> 00:46:56,319
Speaker 10: I just tried to calm the situation down as best

1067
00:46:56,360 --> 00:46:58,799
Speaker 10: as I could, and Michael kept telling them to mind

1068
00:46:58,840 --> 00:47:02,280
Speaker 10: their own business. Yes, honestly, the whole thing was infuriating.

1069
00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:04,720
Speaker 10: We left after dinner to go stay in a hotel.

1070
00:47:04,800 --> 00:47:07,640
Speaker 10: Michael then told me how he thinks his sister is

1071
00:47:07,719 --> 00:47:10,680
Speaker 10: also jealous of me and my ring. Tina has been

1072
00:47:10,719 --> 00:47:14,320
Speaker 10: engaged for over a year now, with still no wedding planned.

1073
00:47:14,480 --> 00:47:17,520
Speaker 10: She was given a tiny ring, albeit with a real diamond,

1074
00:47:17,600 --> 00:47:21,720
Speaker 10: but it is very tiny. Mine through fake, is big

1075
00:47:21,800 --> 00:47:25,239
Speaker 10: and sparkly, and she remarked to him once and he

1076
00:47:25,440 --> 00:47:30,520
Speaker 10: had better not get a prettier looking ring than she had. WTF,

1077
00:47:30,560 --> 00:47:34,160
Speaker 10: Michael and I will be getting married fairly soon, and

1078
00:47:34,400 --> 00:47:37,120
Speaker 10: she seems bitter that her own fiance I still not

1079
00:47:37,280 --> 00:47:38,960
Speaker 10: expressed a desire to start.

1080
00:47:38,719 --> 00:47:39,640
Speaker 2: Planning the wedding.

1081
00:47:39,760 --> 00:47:42,200
Speaker 10: She has also remarked to the past to Michael, how

1082
00:47:42,320 --> 00:47:46,440
Speaker 10: I am too beautiful that my looks are somehow suspicious

1083
00:47:46,560 --> 00:47:48,359
Speaker 10: and I'm just out to get his money. I make

1084
00:47:48,400 --> 00:47:50,560
Speaker 10: my own money as a nurse, and I'm definitely not

1085
00:47:50,800 --> 00:47:53,880
Speaker 10: using Michael for his money now. Tina I started creating

1086
00:47:53,920 --> 00:47:57,240
Speaker 10: all sorts of drama over this posting on Facebook about

1087
00:47:57,280 --> 00:48:00,000
Speaker 10: how real men should know where their priorities lie.

1088
00:48:00,320 --> 00:48:01,480
Speaker 2: Tell a real man.

1089
00:48:01,520 --> 00:48:04,600
Speaker 10: Stick by family, and don't play with little girls who

1090
00:48:04,680 --> 00:48:08,879
Speaker 10: are gold diggers who only care about having a huge rock.

1091
00:48:09,160 --> 00:48:11,680
Speaker 10: Once Stata said show me the paperwork and I might

1092
00:48:11,680 --> 00:48:15,719
Speaker 10: believe the ring isn't real, lol, And another one was

1093
00:48:15,840 --> 00:48:18,960
Speaker 10: some stupid quote about being distracted by shiny things that

1094
00:48:19,000 --> 00:48:23,360
Speaker 10: turn out to be coal and disguised me. I'm guessing loll.

1095
00:48:23,600 --> 00:48:26,560
Speaker 10: She commented lmao with some emojis on my Instagram picture

1096
00:48:26,600 --> 00:48:28,160
Speaker 10: of my ring. I deleted the comment.

1097
00:48:28,280 --> 00:48:28,959
Speaker 2: I only know.

1098
00:48:29,040 --> 00:48:32,160
Speaker 10: This about her Facebook status because Michael showed me through

1099
00:48:32,160 --> 00:48:35,040
Speaker 10: his account. Tina deleted me off everything and they even

1100
00:48:35,120 --> 00:48:37,200
Speaker 10: blocked me. She has sent on a mass email so

1101
00:48:37,239 --> 00:48:40,560
Speaker 10: the whole family and announced that she and Hannah will

1102
00:48:40,600 --> 00:48:43,440
Speaker 10: not be attending my wedding. No, we're supporting Michael's marriage

1103
00:48:43,480 --> 00:48:45,640
Speaker 10: to me, and then listed all of the reasons I

1104
00:48:45,680 --> 00:48:48,480
Speaker 10: really don't love him. I'm a gold digger, Michael doesn't

1105
00:48:48,480 --> 00:48:50,880
Speaker 10: care about his family anymore. However, at the end of

1106
00:48:50,880 --> 00:48:54,120
Speaker 10: the email, she said that she may consider believing Michael

1107
00:48:54,360 --> 00:48:56,120
Speaker 10: if she saw proof.

1108
00:48:55,880 --> 00:48:58,360
Speaker 2: That my ring wasn't real. Right. I am at a

1109
00:48:58,400 --> 00:49:00,000
Speaker 2: complete loss as what to do here.

1110
00:49:00,200 --> 00:49:03,200
Speaker 10: Michael is also shocked, but not really because he is

1111
00:49:03,280 --> 00:49:06,400
Speaker 10: so used to his sister's antics. He took my side

1112
00:49:06,600 --> 00:49:08,600
Speaker 10: and I appreciate that, but when I talked to him

1113
00:49:08,640 --> 00:49:11,360
Speaker 10: about cutting off his family for good, he seemed hesitant.

1114
00:49:11,400 --> 00:49:14,000
Speaker 10: I think he just doesn't want to create more drama.

1115
00:49:14,080 --> 00:49:18,239
Speaker 10: But I need him to draw a hard line somewhere. Anyways, guys,

1116
00:49:18,239 --> 00:49:20,840
Speaker 10: where is your hard line line?

1117
00:49:21,160 --> 00:49:23,360
Speaker 2: Everyone? We're gonna We're gonna close your eyes. Everyone.

1118
00:49:23,480 --> 00:49:26,640
Speaker 10: Think of where your line was in this story. Dakota,

1119
00:49:26,680 --> 00:49:27,279
Speaker 10: where was your line?

1120
00:49:27,320 --> 00:49:28,520
Speaker 5: You didn't close your eyes close?

1121
00:49:29,120 --> 00:49:31,160
Speaker 2: Where's my line in the story? Where's your line in

1122
00:49:31,160 --> 00:49:31,600
Speaker 2: the story?

1123
00:49:32,160 --> 00:49:35,879
Speaker 3: Probably like the having the nerve to be like, how

1124
00:49:35,960 --> 00:49:38,920
Speaker 3: dare you're spending money on a ring for your fiance

1125
00:49:39,080 --> 00:49:42,120
Speaker 3: when you should be like being the provider for your sisters,

1126
00:49:42,280 --> 00:49:42,959
Speaker 3: I'd be like.

1127
00:49:42,920 --> 00:49:46,000
Speaker 5: Who are do you have no shame? The thing is, I.

1128
00:49:45,960 --> 00:49:49,400
Speaker 10: Don't want Tina and Hannah coming along every few months

1129
00:49:49,480 --> 00:49:52,000
Speaker 10: asking for money and judging us. I don't want my

1130
00:49:52,080 --> 00:49:55,160
Speaker 10: marriage to involve their pettiness and begging. I won't give

1131
00:49:55,280 --> 00:49:58,040
Speaker 10: any of my hard earned money to them, that's for sure.

1132
00:49:58,120 --> 00:50:00,200
Speaker 10: I don't want Michael to either, but I guess I

1133
00:50:00,200 --> 00:50:02,799
Speaker 10: can't force him not to. I just worry because that

1134
00:50:02,840 --> 00:50:06,839
Speaker 10: could be money our future children need, or money we need.

1135
00:50:06,880 --> 00:50:09,440
Speaker 10: How can I handle the situation? At this point? I

1136
00:50:09,520 --> 00:50:13,399
Speaker 10: never want to see his sisters again. This one comment says, hallelujah,

1137
00:50:13,440 --> 00:50:15,560
Speaker 10: he's done the dirty work for you. You need to

1138
00:50:15,600 --> 00:50:18,200
Speaker 10: have a good long talk with Michael, with a counselor

1139
00:50:18,520 --> 00:50:22,040
Speaker 10: present if necessary. You guys need to ensure you're both

1140
00:50:22,040 --> 00:50:25,000
Speaker 10: on the same page in regards to what your obligations

1141
00:50:25,000 --> 00:50:28,400
Speaker 10: to your extended family are and how you spend your money.

1142
00:50:28,520 --> 00:50:31,120
Speaker 2: And now in the future. I think cutting his.

1143
00:50:31,080 --> 00:50:33,680
Speaker 10: Sisters out of your life should be absolutely a no

1144
00:50:33,880 --> 00:50:36,200
Speaker 10: brainer for you both, But it sounds like Michael is

1145
00:50:36,239 --> 00:50:39,200
Speaker 10: still struggling to let go of his internalized belief, no

1146
00:50:39,320 --> 00:50:42,279
Speaker 10: doubt hammered into him since childhood, that his sisters are

1147
00:50:42,280 --> 00:50:44,560
Speaker 10: good and must be obeyed. But both of you are

1148
00:50:44,600 --> 00:50:47,440
Speaker 10: a team. Work with him to extract himself from this

1149
00:50:47,520 --> 00:50:50,840
Speaker 10: toxic family. But be firm with your boundaries. But seriously,

1150
00:50:50,960 --> 00:50:53,400
Speaker 10: do not invite the sisters to the wedding, even when

1151
00:50:53,400 --> 00:50:56,719
Speaker 10: they belivolently change their minds and decree that they will

1152
00:50:56,719 --> 00:50:59,440
Speaker 10: come to the wedding, even when they suck up to you,

1153
00:50:59,560 --> 00:51:02,919
Speaker 10: even when they demand to know why they aren't your bridesmaids,

1154
00:51:02,960 --> 00:51:05,560
Speaker 10: even when they punt and scream at you for stealing

1155
00:51:05,640 --> 00:51:08,960
Speaker 10: their brother away. Being invited to your wedding is a privilege,

1156
00:51:09,040 --> 00:51:11,560
Speaker 10: not a right, And their behavior has put them in

1157
00:51:11,600 --> 00:51:15,759
Speaker 10: a very firmly negative way, and that is the end

1158
00:51:15,800 --> 00:51:16,480
Speaker 10: of that story.

1159
00:51:16,640 --> 00:51:20,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, definitely a toxic environment that has been learned over time.

1160
00:51:20,560 --> 00:51:21,799
Speaker 5: Yeah, get out of there.

1161
00:51:21,880 --> 00:51:23,720
Speaker 2: I don't know what do you call that, like therapy

1162
00:51:23,960 --> 00:51:24,319
Speaker 2: you need?

1163
00:51:24,600 --> 00:51:27,920
Speaker 3: I just don't get how the sisters like, what is

1164
00:51:27,960 --> 00:51:30,440
Speaker 3: that one thing you know, is that one thing that

1165
00:51:30,800 --> 00:51:35,160
Speaker 3: you need therapy. I'll understand why the sisters are like,

1166
00:51:35,200 --> 00:51:37,800
Speaker 3: you have to provide for us, but also we see.

1167
00:51:37,560 --> 00:51:40,400
Speaker 5: No value in you providing for your wife. You shouldn't

1168
00:51:40,440 --> 00:51:40,640
Speaker 5: do that.

1169
00:51:40,760 --> 00:51:43,160
Speaker 3: I thought you were a real man who only provides

1170
00:51:43,200 --> 00:51:44,160
Speaker 3: for his sisters.

1171
00:51:44,360 --> 00:51:44,920
Speaker 5: What is that?

1172
00:51:45,200 --> 00:51:47,920
Speaker 10: Yeah, that's a wild I don't know. Just I know

1173
00:51:47,960 --> 00:51:50,400
Speaker 10: it's hard to cut family out. I think taking the

1174
00:51:50,480 --> 00:51:52,960
Speaker 10: sisters out of the equations easy. The parents, I probably

1175
00:51:53,040 --> 00:51:54,839
Speaker 10: still have them around. I know that's a hard one,

1176
00:51:54,880 --> 00:51:57,280
Speaker 10: but I still would have a you know, low contact maybe,

1177
00:51:57,320 --> 00:51:59,640
Speaker 10: But the parents, I mean, it's hard to come up there.

1178
00:51:59,719 --> 00:52:03,880
Speaker 8: What's hard harder dealing with cutting off family or dealing

1179
00:52:03,880 --> 00:52:04,920
Speaker 8: with toxic family?

1180
00:52:05,120 --> 00:52:06,600
Speaker 2: I think cutting off family's harder.

1181
00:52:06,680 --> 00:52:09,200
Speaker 8: I don't know once you realize. Hey, because I when

1182
00:52:09,239 --> 00:52:11,360
Speaker 8: I witnessed a good family dynamic, I was like, I

1183
00:52:11,400 --> 00:52:13,360
Speaker 8: kind of broke down and cried. I was like, WHOA,

1184
00:52:13,680 --> 00:52:15,600
Speaker 8: that's crazy. Y'all have fun.

1185
00:52:15,719 --> 00:52:18,360
Speaker 2: We just yelled, I'm sorry.

1186
00:52:18,960 --> 00:52:20,080
Speaker 5: No chaos