Speaker 1: Good morning, good afternoon, good evening. You are tuned into
Speaker 1: the Vitamin DVA Dawn Day Podcast and I'm your host,
Speaker 1: Dawn Day, here to get you excited about your life
Speaker 1: so that you can live life on purpose and for
Speaker 1: a purpose. If you're returning, welcome back, thank you, I
Speaker 1: love you, I appreciate you. And if this is your
Speaker 1: first time, welcome, um, welcome on the journey of my dreams.
Speaker 1: Welcome and thank you for choosing to live your best life. Now,
Speaker 1: let me tell you this right now, Vitamin D is
Speaker 1: U pun off my name, right, So you get vitamin
Speaker 1: D from the sun. So I'm here to shed light
Speaker 1: into your life. But let's be clear. When we talk
Speaker 1: about vitamin D and shedding a light, that means on
Speaker 1: the good and the bad. Because if you want to
Speaker 1: be better and you want to do better, you gotta
Speaker 1: be able to see better. And we do that with
Speaker 1: inspirational insights and conversations with celebrities and everyday people like
Speaker 1: you and me. So this is all about unraveling, and
Speaker 1: it takes times that we're just thinking and we're just
Speaker 1: being and we're just feeling and we're coming in and
Speaker 1: perfectly perfect. So no, you don't have to be ready. No,
Speaker 1: you don't have to always be optimistic. I just want
Speaker 1: you to show up as you show up as you
Speaker 1: and getting ready to see you. And uh, we're gonna
Speaker 1: be seeing an individual today the world has seen. She's
Speaker 1: a legend um. She is the first female NBA referee.
Speaker 1: Her name is Violet Palmer. I had an episode on
Speaker 1: her before, but I was like, says, we didn't changed
Speaker 1: it up a little bit. We're in the studio. I
Speaker 1: need to bring her and do it right in the studio.
Speaker 1: And we're gonna delve a little deeper because we all
Speaker 1: know the story about her being the first female NBA referee,
Speaker 1: but I'm interested in knowing a little bit more about
Speaker 1: the woman behind the whistle. So we're gonna blow the
Speaker 1: whist on this episode. So without further ado, it's time
Speaker 1: for your dose a vitamin D. Right with me and
Speaker 1: get excited about Hello, Well, what's going on this donde?
Speaker 1: What's going on home? Paul? Listen is Paula? How you doing?
Speaker 1: You know what? I'm fabulous and uh, very very happy
Speaker 1: to be here with you, just to shed a little
Speaker 1: light on this beautiful day. I'm I'm happy to be
Speaker 1: here thank you for having me, thank you, thank you
Speaker 1: for coming again. Thank you for believing in my trains.
Speaker 1: Because when I had you won the first time, that
Speaker 1: was when the did the pandemic just started. We're in
Speaker 1: the midst of it was close, real close. It probably
Speaker 1: had been going on maybe several months or something like that.
Speaker 1: But yes, we had to do the whole zoom thing
Speaker 1: from my from my house and you I don't even
Speaker 1: know where you are. We're in a studio now. I
Speaker 1: love it what you're saying. God is good all the
Speaker 1: time every day. Listen, we got conversation. I love your shirt,
Speaker 1: black and Proud. I love that. Thank you. What's the inspiration?
Speaker 1: Tell me? Well, of course, you know, I'm uh always
Speaker 1: gonna support who I am. And I thought, of course,
Speaker 1: I love the colors. And again it said black and proud,
Speaker 1: and that's exactly what I am. And you know, you
Speaker 1: know how you see something and it's something just inspirational
Speaker 1: and it kind of shares a little bit of who
Speaker 1: you are, and that was my one reason for buying
Speaker 1: the shirt. Isn't amazing. I think if we lived a
Speaker 1: life where we were just stepping and walking who we are,
Speaker 1: the abundance that comes because like there's only one fingerprint,
Speaker 1: one footprint that assigned to us, and it's like, yo,
Speaker 1: it's an open lane for you. So true. But you know,
Speaker 1: and I'm finding and I need and even for myself,
Speaker 1: I think as far as like being able to wear
Speaker 1: this shirt or this T shirt, I think it just
Speaker 1: comes from within. And I think for some of us,
Speaker 1: we don't we're not sure are we were hesitant or
Speaker 1: we're not comfortable with just being who we are. And
Speaker 1: I think for me, um, throughout my entire life and
Speaker 1: my entire career, I've got more comfortable and of course
Speaker 1: for me being a lesbian one and and you know,
Speaker 1: and I'm and I can admit that that was a
Speaker 1: struggle for me at a point in time. But you
Speaker 1: know what, it's not me Moore, and it's I feel
Speaker 1: good and and want to share and don't have a
Speaker 1: you know, don't have a problem talking about it, don't
Speaker 1: have a problem wearing it, don't have a problem letting
Speaker 1: anybody know because this is me. And I tell people
Speaker 1: all the time, I go for the people who don't
Speaker 1: like me, you don't even know me, and you didn't
Speaker 1: for the people who feel the same way and love me.
Speaker 1: Those are the people who I want to be around,
Speaker 1: and those are the people that support me, and those
Speaker 1: are the people that I love back what Laura Hill
Speaker 1: said it best. She said, how are you gonna win
Speaker 1: when you ain't right with that? You have to be
Speaker 1: come because that's you know, being successful, having people in
Speaker 1: your life, being supportive, all those things. It's a it's
Speaker 1: a full circle, and it can't the glass can't be
Speaker 1: half full because something's gonna be missing. And I think
Speaker 1: and looking at life and looking at looking at you,
Speaker 1: looking at myself, the reason why we're smiling and we're successful,
Speaker 1: and we're happy, and we're loving and we have love
Speaker 1: in our lives, it's because we're being who we really
Speaker 1: are meant to be. And I think that's that's a
Speaker 1: major struggle for a lot of us. We just, you know,
Speaker 1: for whatever the hesitations, maybe we don't know what they are,
Speaker 1: and everybody's different, but I know that, you know, when
Speaker 1: I made that decision to necessarily come out, and it
Speaker 1: was probably one of the biggest momentous moments of my
Speaker 1: life because I had been with my my wife, which
Speaker 1: was just my see there was my partner at the time,
Speaker 1: but we have been together twenty years. Wait, well I didn't.
Speaker 1: We have been together twenty six now. But when I
Speaker 1: literally came out as far as work in the world,
Speaker 1: I was getting married. And this is a true story, right,
Speaker 1: this is a good one. You're gonna love it. Tanya Williams,
Speaker 1: which was our officiate, and she, uh, we were having
Speaker 1: a dress rehearsal at my house for our wedding and
Speaker 1: she and she said, you know a violence. She said,
Speaker 1: you can't keep this a secret. And I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: it's you know, this is what Tanya and I want
Speaker 1: to do. We're sharing it with our friends and family
Speaker 1: and you know, she says, but she said, you are
Speaker 1: an inspiration for your community. She said, you cannot have
Speaker 1: this moment. You have been with your partner for twenty years.
Speaker 1: She said, do you not know how many women you
Speaker 1: can help by giving your story sharing it? So sure
Speaker 1: enough I called the NBA and uh spoke with PR
Speaker 1: to let them know because at that point I was
Speaker 1: still employed, you know, that was my employer. So I'm like, hey,
Speaker 1: I'm getting married. You know, I'm having uh, you know,
Speaker 1: a big ceremony and it may be some plublicity. I
Speaker 1: don't know. How about they embraced it. I end up
Speaker 1: doing interviews and here, and it actually just went bigger
Speaker 1: than what it went viral um, which was kind of fun.
Speaker 1: But I really was so appreciative of her because she
Speaker 1: just spoke up as someone who cared about me and
Speaker 1: Tanya and said, you can't let this moment come Sharon,
Speaker 1: and I went, you know what, You're right, one of
Speaker 1: the best decisions I have ever made in my life,
Speaker 1: not only not to get married, but to necessarily come
Speaker 1: out at that point in time. And for me, you know,
Speaker 1: don it wasn't one of those where I was afraid
Speaker 1: to do it. I was just I was working, I'm good,
Speaker 1: I had my family. I'm just doing what I do.
Speaker 1: And when the whole Merits thing came about, you know what,
Speaker 1: knock on wood, it was time. It was time to
Speaker 1: let the world know. And sure enough, beautiful, Yeah, you
Speaker 1: asked that a couple things because it's like, like it
Speaker 1: sounds so simple because all you have to do is
Speaker 1: show up for yourself. Very true, but it wasn't simple.
Speaker 1: But you're right, you understand that it wasn't simple, right,
Speaker 1: But it's like how it really was. Things in the way,
Speaker 1: and we sit in a moment of waiting for us
Speaker 1: someone to tell us how to walk, how to talk,
Speaker 1: how to exist and to be when the secret is
Speaker 1: is just to be. And you know, it was interesting
Speaker 1: case you said you had to call the NBA to
Speaker 1: let them know that the ceremony was going on. We're
Speaker 1: not necessarily the ceremony. It's just that once I, of
Speaker 1: course publicly came out, now I had um different magazines
Speaker 1: calling me wanting to talk to me, wanting to do
Speaker 1: an interview. And at that point in time, when I
Speaker 1: was employed with the NBA, you had to actually get
Speaker 1: their permission because of me being an employer, and they
Speaker 1: see they promised, oh yeah, they own kind of your rights.
Speaker 1: When you in my position as a referee, I had
Speaker 1: to actually get permission to do any interview. If I
Speaker 1: was still working with them, I would have had to
Speaker 1: get permission to come talk to you, because that's just
Speaker 1: the way the um the agreement is is written up.
Speaker 1: So obviously when I came out, no hesitation literally approved it.
Speaker 1: Did my interviews, no, nope, nope, no hassle. You know,
Speaker 1: for me, they never really not approved any interview that
Speaker 1: I wanted to do. Never, which was a positive because
Speaker 1: well you know what, because how about the case you
Speaker 1: need a reminder? Thank you let the people know because
Speaker 1: Queen V opened it up and guys even said to me,
Speaker 1: now that's on staff, they go wild violent. You know what.
Speaker 1: Once they allowed you to do it, they allowed the
Speaker 1: rest of us to do it too. You So see
Speaker 1: there it just came. How about I'm like, you know what,
Speaker 1: I need to share that with you. So you're just
Speaker 1: out here popping, just do it, just a little something,
Speaker 1: just really big, like just just divinely you just out
Speaker 1: here glowing and it's just so interesting. And that's what
Speaker 1: this podcast is all about. You know, it's a shed
Speaker 1: in the light, but realizing that the light that you're
Speaker 1: shedding is just taking off the layers of your light within.
Speaker 1: And then wait a minute, holda HOLDA, holda holda. Then
Speaker 1: you step into it right correct, and you just allow
Speaker 1: people to see you and then you shine. And this,
Speaker 1: like you said, you gave other people to permission to shine.
Speaker 1: You know what, I'll take it. How about if if
Speaker 1: something in which I think for for a lot of us,
Speaker 1: and and it's really I say this the kids all
Speaker 1: the time, I go, you really you don't know what's
Speaker 1: out there for you. You don't know you. You just
Speaker 1: have to have some faith and want to step out
Speaker 1: on it. But be all that can be is me
Speaker 1: and the people that are around me, and the success
Speaker 1: that I had and the love that I have in
Speaker 1: my life. All I can do is share that, And
Speaker 1: I think that's something that when when I look at
Speaker 1: you and us having I remember us sitting at a
Speaker 1: restaurant on the bar stools with some friends and you
Speaker 1: were telling me what you were trying to do. Really
Speaker 1: and here you are. Make it a dream and you
Speaker 1: can do it right there you go, you dream it.
Speaker 1: You can be living my dreams wide awake. Right. I
Speaker 1: love it. I like the wide awake part. They have
Speaker 1: to steal that one. I'm gonna have to give that
Speaker 1: to Tiffany Beasley. She came with that live your dreams
Speaker 1: wide awake, because I think often times we think of
Speaker 1: dreams were sleep and sleep your dormant. Absolutely, and we
Speaker 1: are beings that are meant to live out fully. So
Speaker 1: Happy Pride Month. Hello. So wasn't an issue of you
Speaker 1: coming out like so? It was publicly out there, so
Speaker 1: nobody in the NBA knew. No. Well put it like this.
Speaker 1: I had my core group because it was sixty of
Speaker 1: us at the time, sixty guys and plus myself that
Speaker 1: worked in they that were in the NBA. It's a
Speaker 1: small number, it's a it's sixty leans across the country,
Speaker 1: in the entire world and the world in the world.
Speaker 1: That's it. Yo, this, do you understand who's right here?
Speaker 1: Catch it? Catch it? Because I want to delve into
Speaker 1: deeper of talking about what it means to really be
Speaker 1: the first. But sorry, I just got so sixty of
Speaker 1: y'all are out here. Yes, So I had a group,
Speaker 1: you know, I had my ten I calling my boys,
Speaker 1: and these are boys that I that I was in
Speaker 1: training with and to this day, those are some of
Speaker 1: my best friends. So they knew, yes, my core group
Speaker 1: of guys that I had established a really really good relationship.
Speaker 1: We're friends. They knew. But I hadn't publicly come out
Speaker 1: to like the world and everyone. So of course, in
Speaker 1: Layman's terms, I was still kind of in the closet.
Speaker 1: But family knew clearly, My family knew. You know, everybody
Speaker 1: was fine. But I just had not came out with
Speaker 1: work because I guess at the time I really didn't
Speaker 1: have to. I didn't feel like I didn't want to
Speaker 1: make a big deal out of it, but you know what,
Speaker 1: timing is everything. Because when I decided to get married, um,
Speaker 1: I had already been in the league more than ten years,
Speaker 1: and I had made it to the playoffs. I had
Speaker 1: established myself, so I knew that. You know, and I
Speaker 1: say this to young women who are struggling, struggling as
Speaker 1: far as work wise or whether they want to come
Speaker 1: out of whether they don't. I said, look, I said,
Speaker 1: you know what, here's what I found. I found that
Speaker 1: the person that you are, people are gonna love you.
Speaker 1: For the ones who are gonna have something negative to say,
Speaker 1: they don't even know you, and they don't even matter.
Speaker 1: So just be yourself and when the time is right
Speaker 1: in your heart, you can do it. And I think
Speaker 1: that's what really happened with me. I was so excited
Speaker 1: I was getting married. I had to have the love
Speaker 1: of my life. This was our twenty year anniversary, and
Speaker 1: we had made a pack that if we could make
Speaker 1: it to twenty years, and of course Prop eight had
Speaker 1: just passed, the timing was impeccable, so of course got
Speaker 1: married fast forward. We've been you know, we've been together
Speaker 1: twenty six years. And you know, you gotta know, I
Speaker 1: am truly blessed. I have an amazing wife and she's
Speaker 1: doing her thing and we're you know, just extremely supportive
Speaker 1: of each other. And you know, that's probably the one
Speaker 1: of the most magnificent parts of my life that people
Speaker 1: who know me, they go, you know what, YouTube are
Speaker 1: just beautiful and you know, I'm just like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: I just fly fabulous. Is just some of us are
Speaker 1: just blessed And I'll take I'll take it. Did you
Speaker 1: say that video that when viral on Instagram with that
Speaker 1: little boy, which one there's been so many, right the
Speaker 1: little boy in which his brother was slapping him and
Speaker 1: beating him up and said thom about something you can't
Speaker 1: be gay and not be getting his sister was filming.
Speaker 1: Yet No, I have not seen that because it's it's
Speaker 1: interesting because it's like the times that we're in right now,
Speaker 1: you know, with proposition aid and just just a little
Speaker 1: nas x. You know, everybody, you know, one would think
Speaker 1: that you're stepping into self and and then now you know,
Speaker 1: you know, boastfully, you know, carrying your pride, But then
Speaker 1: you realize about how many people are still quote unquote
Speaker 1: in the closet or just being ridiculed, and you think
Speaker 1: about how precious a Childooh, so this young boy, they
Speaker 1: actually first of all, they pushed his hairline all the
Speaker 1: way back and on the side of his head they
Speaker 1: put gay and he said, why do you think they
Speaker 1: got this? And they're slapping upside his head right and
Speaker 1: he said, cause the way you're acting with you way
Speaker 1: you're acting, I could be misconstrained. And you can check
Speaker 1: it out on social media, and it's like because of
Speaker 1: the way you act, because of the way you act.
Speaker 1: And then there was another video that posted up with
Speaker 1: the young man was on the live video, and on
Speaker 1: the live video, he's up there and saying, oh, you know,
Speaker 1: everybody needs to relax and chill. You know, that's my siblings.
Speaker 1: They just didn't want me to do that way. It's
Speaker 1: not like they're abusing me or hey, you know, doing whatever.
Speaker 1: But it's just that when you think about the psychological
Speaker 1: part of it, not only if you talking about the sexuality,
Speaker 1: but you're putting them on blast, you're slapping them in
Speaker 1: the face, you're defaming something, and it's like one of
Speaker 1: those things that I guess it all to me is
Speaker 1: like with self love because when you love something that
Speaker 1: you appreciate it, you want to share it with the world. Absolutely,
Speaker 1: and it is so valuable and important to have the
Speaker 1: people that I love you and your family to support.
Speaker 1: That is huge and I can I can attest to
Speaker 1: being you know, that woman sitting in front of her mother,
Speaker 1: and I never forget it was like my mother is
Speaker 1: sitting like I'm sitting across from you. We were at
Speaker 1: the kitchen table at my mom at my mom's house,
Speaker 1: the house I grew up in right to this day,
Speaker 1: and I said, Mom, I gotta tell you something, but
Speaker 1: I'll do you. At this time, oh no, I was
Speaker 1: an adult. Let's see. I I got married fourteen. So
Speaker 1: I literally talked to my mother. It was early when
Speaker 1: I was saying, when we were planning our wedding, and
Speaker 1: I said, Mom, like, I have to tell you this
Speaker 1: because I just want to, you know, I know, you know,
Speaker 1: but Tanya and I we've talked to our girls and
Speaker 1: we're gonna get married. And I started it with I said,
Speaker 1: you know, you know prop eid mom, right, you know,
Speaker 1: because my mom's old school. My mother would be ninety
Speaker 1: and next month, okay, we're gonna have a huge, big
Speaker 1: old celebration for so I went, I was wanting to
Speaker 1: make sure that she understood what I was saying. So
Speaker 1: I said, you know about prop Eide. She said, yeah,
Speaker 1: I know about prop Vine. I said, okay, Well, Tanya
Speaker 1: and I we've decided we're gonna get married. And she says,
Speaker 1: and I'm and I'm waiting for some negativity here because
Speaker 1: I'm talking to an old school Baptist woman. Now, okay,
Speaker 1: so you know, so I'm waiting and she says, oh God.
Speaker 1: She says, um, can my best friend come? I literally
Speaker 1: thought I started crying because she was so excited. And
Speaker 1: I said, well, Mom, I was just making sure that
Speaker 1: you you know that you were okay about coming? And
Speaker 1: she said coming, She said, of course I'll be there,
Speaker 1: and I mean never, I mean, just went forward, beautiful ceremony.
Speaker 1: And I told my mother. I said, Mom, you have
Speaker 1: no idea your excitement what you just did for me.
Speaker 1: She said, you know what? VI? She said, how about this?
Speaker 1: She and this was interesting? She said, you and Tanya
Speaker 1: have raised three beautiful young women. She said, one thing
Speaker 1: I can tell you, and I've learned this from you.
Speaker 1: Love is love and this is a woman. When when
Speaker 1: my father passed away. My mother and father had been
Speaker 1: together sixty five years, so my mother knows bingo and
Speaker 1: that's what she told me. And I was good. I said, wow,
Speaker 1: you know when when you see again, and we just
Speaker 1: had the story about this young boy and his family.
Speaker 1: That is so you know, kids are in the street
Speaker 1: right now homeless because they came out and their and
Speaker 1: their family disowned them or their or their parents kicked
Speaker 1: them out or whatever the case may be. And that's like, no,
Speaker 1: you that's the embracement that you need. You need that
Speaker 1: love and you need that support from your family because
Speaker 1: that's the backbone. And I think for me, yes, what
Speaker 1: I have had a beautiful ceremony, what I've gone through
Speaker 1: with everything. If my mother wasn't there, of course I
Speaker 1: would have, but there still would have been an emptiness
Speaker 1: in my heart. And to see my mother walked down
Speaker 1: that aisle, come in there smiling, it was everything for
Speaker 1: me and my entire fact my brother walked me downnisle.
Speaker 1: I mean it was inimaginable for me. Tanya's brother walked
Speaker 1: her down the eye. So when I tell you, wonderful,
Speaker 1: you know, just just being able to have this conversation
Speaker 1: which is so cool because it's not like I've shared
Speaker 1: a lot of this with a lot you know, just everybody.
Speaker 1: But it's funny how things just happen and you ask
Speaker 1: the questions and I'm like, yes, we can go there
Speaker 1: because it's like we can. You can never get enough love.
Speaker 1: I don't feel like and and it's interesting. Um, and
Speaker 1: I guess that's the next thing I want to talk about.
Speaker 1: Being able to find love, you had to be able
Speaker 1: to recognize it. So what you know coming up? I'm
Speaker 1: sure you may have known, but when did you accept
Speaker 1: it or embrace it? And because I can only imagine,
Speaker 1: like you said, your mom is ninety and her generation,
Speaker 1: what was that like going to bed l a black
Speaker 1: woman in a Protestant household? Absolutely? But how about this?
Speaker 1: You know what I learned is is that I thought
Speaker 1: I had this big secret. I literally did. I thought no,
Speaker 1: because we all do. I mean, you know, so found
Speaker 1: out later after I got with Tania. You know this
Speaker 1: was later my older sister, Uh, one day came and
Speaker 1: said to me, she said, girl, Uh, you ain't in
Speaker 1: no closet everybody. No, you said, you need to stop,
Speaker 1: she said, she said, g I've been knowing you know
Speaker 1: you were gay since you were in middle school or
Speaker 1: high school something. She said something so long ago, and
Speaker 1: I looked at her. She said, at nobody caring. She said,
Speaker 1: you're my sister, and you're the bomb. She's like, so
Speaker 1: none of us care. So of course you can do
Speaker 1: what you want and you can say it or not
Speaker 1: say it, but we all knew, and that happens, and
Speaker 1: I'm sure and so many households with young women young
Speaker 1: men who want to come out, and you know, and
Speaker 1: I say that, I say the kids all the time.
Speaker 1: I go, trust me, your mother know. And it's interesting
Speaker 1: that you said of like you grew up in her
Speaker 1: her whom like you can. And I always do the reverse,
Speaker 1: Like I know, when my mother was still around and alive,
Speaker 1: I knew her the way her kids were jingle breath,
Speaker 1: And it's just like, how could everything? Why are we
Speaker 1: acting oblivious to this whole you know, I shouldn't say whole,
Speaker 1: but to this moment when I'm your child, right, But
Speaker 1: you do have to kind of go through it, and
Speaker 1: I think every every person is different and there is
Speaker 1: no judgment. There's no judgment on how soon you do it,
Speaker 1: how soon you don't, how you do how you do
Speaker 1: it none, because those are decisions that every single individual
Speaker 1: has to make for themselves, and you do what was
Speaker 1: right for you. And I did what was right for me,
Speaker 1: you know, and you know, thank God that it was
Speaker 1: wonderful and it was fine, and my career has been
Speaker 1: great because you know, you have to realize too for me.
Speaker 1: You know, at the time I was just getting my
Speaker 1: career off, I wasn't sure, and so I just didn't.
Speaker 1: I didn't do anything. It's not like I said I
Speaker 1: was trying to hide it, because I really wasn't. But
Speaker 1: you know, you don't know, and and my career was
Speaker 1: important and I was establishing myself and you know all that.
Speaker 1: So of course, once I had did all that, I
Speaker 1: went the hell with it. Hey, so you live a
Speaker 1: little longer and you realize when you've got issues, you're
Speaker 1: the only one dealing with it. When you got bills
Speaker 1: to pay, you the only one dealing with it. Why
Speaker 1: am I allowing you to come into my life and
Speaker 1: dictate how I live it? Bingo, And you don't. We
Speaker 1: don't have to do that. And see that's something. And
Speaker 1: I say this to to any young boy or girl
Speaker 1: who is struggling I go, look your story. It's probably
Speaker 1: a lot different than mine, but here is mine, and
Speaker 1: I guarantee you the same way I feel. You're feeling
Speaker 1: it right now and it's okay. And you make your
Speaker 1: decisions based on your life and when you want to
Speaker 1: do it. I said, when I tell you one thing,
Speaker 1: once you do it, it is probably one of the
Speaker 1: most You just feel free, hey, feel like you know what.
Speaker 1: People really know me, you know. And I remember, and
Speaker 1: I tell this story to two young kids. I remember,
Speaker 1: you know, when I was in the NBA, we used
Speaker 1: to we when we would get together for our meetings
Speaker 1: and I would be with my guys, and then we
Speaker 1: would go to lunch after and so of course we'll
Speaker 1: be sitting across the table having lunch and guys be like, well, oh,
Speaker 1: how's your wife for you know, how are your kids?
Speaker 1: And I'm silent. I say nothing. I came out. Now
Speaker 1: we have, you know, we have our lunches or we
Speaker 1: have our meetings, and the first thing to guys go,
Speaker 1: what's a vague Hey queenie, how's he doing? You know
Speaker 1: how the girls? I went, thank you. At least now
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm normal too, because we really are
Speaker 1: it's the same, you know what I mean. And I
Speaker 1: think those little small things help with your growth and
Speaker 1: your your the way you feel about yourself and the
Speaker 1: way you carry yourself and that like and I have
Speaker 1: to give time your credit, you know, she said, Um
Speaker 1: that being the example for who we are can help
Speaker 1: a lot of other women because you really never know,
Speaker 1: you never know, you know, like you you, having you
Speaker 1: doing what you do can inspire so many people us.
Speaker 1: Just having this conversation, someone can be struggling and then
Speaker 1: they can listen to this and go, you know what,
Speaker 1: I can do this, And that's really what it's about.
Speaker 1: But you have to actually share it and be and
Speaker 1: be comfortable with yourself and be comfortable with who you
Speaker 1: are to be able to do it. But here again,
Speaker 1: you and I we have this positive, positive, um you know,
Speaker 1: attitude or life where we can share and possibly help
Speaker 1: someone else. Right, And it's just showing up to say, hey,
Speaker 1: give yourself permission to be you. But here's the thing.
Speaker 1: This is something that you said and I'm interested in
Speaker 1: interview point. You said, once you came out and you spoke,
Speaker 1: there was a level of freedom. And I talked about
Speaker 1: this with Jeremiah as you met my assistant. Uh, it
Speaker 1: still seems as though like there's a level of freedom,
Speaker 1: like I don't like labels, but it seems as though,
Speaker 1: you know, Jeremiah has explained it. There's a you have
Speaker 1: to explain a label with the label, even if you
Speaker 1: don't want to be a label correct, because I don't
Speaker 1: have one either. It's just me mean, it's just I mean,
Speaker 1: there is no label. Yes, I mean, I know who
Speaker 1: I am and if someone asked me, because I don't
Speaker 1: think you know. I think the people who really know
Speaker 1: me they know. But I don't think you walk into it.
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't walk into a room and someone goes,
Speaker 1: oh you're you know, or I don't think so I
Speaker 1: don't think. I guess maybe I'm maybe I give people
Speaker 1: the benefit of the doubt. But I think that if
Speaker 1: if I am asked, or if I'm attending any type
Speaker 1: of event, or if I'm going somewhere and I don't
Speaker 1: have to be I'm not going to be some secret.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna you know, that's my thing. I am comfortable
Speaker 1: enough with who I am, who I'm married to, my
Speaker 1: life that nothing else matters, and that if you have
Speaker 1: a problem with it, Okay, then I can excuse myself
Speaker 1: and I'm still gonna be good. Don't pay me no
Speaker 1: mind and be like, Okay, well, well you know, if
Speaker 1: that's on you, it's not on me. And I think
Speaker 1: for me, uh, living this part of my life, you know,
Speaker 1: it's it's just the best because I just feel like
Speaker 1: I'm being my true self at this point. There is
Speaker 1: no secrets at any point in time, and whatever I'm
Speaker 1: doing or it doesn't matter whether it's work, whether it's
Speaker 1: with my friends, whether it's with my family, I don't
Speaker 1: really care because I know that this is who I
Speaker 1: am and I will always just be comfortable with me.
Speaker 1: And then I guess if you were trying to cover
Speaker 1: up or to pretend to be anyone else, there's a
Speaker 1: level which you have to constantly keep up with, and
Speaker 1: that's just over exertion. And this is just showing up
Speaker 1: and say hey, well no and it mind you, it's
Speaker 1: not even gonna it's not even gonna be right because
Speaker 1: I'm not really being my true self. And I think
Speaker 1: if you once you make that decision, you know, um,
Speaker 1: it's huge. And it was interesting. I was watching Oprah's
Speaker 1: special on with Father's she just had right before Father's Day,
Speaker 1: I think it was. It was on own and she
Speaker 1: had all these men and Dwayne Wade was on there,
Speaker 1: and you know, he has his daughter Zaiah, and he
Speaker 1: was talking about how um that when Zaia came out,
Speaker 1: they kind of wanted it to be a secret, you know,
Speaker 1: because they were more protective. In his head, he thought
Speaker 1: he was protecting her. This is what he said now.
Speaker 1: And he said he actually had to sit back and
Speaker 1: look at himself and realize that I'm not trying to
Speaker 1: protect Zia because she's good. I am. I don't want
Speaker 1: to deal with it. I'm trying to I don't want
Speaker 1: to answer the questions. And he said that's when he
Speaker 1: started doing research and reading and talking to his daughter.
Speaker 1: He says his daughter made him comfortable to be able
Speaker 1: to verbalize it and say, this is my daughter and
Speaker 1: she's transgender, and this is how we're gonna live, and
Speaker 1: I'm gonna gabriel Gabrielle and I are going to support her.
Speaker 1: And that's it. It touched my heart. I went, that's
Speaker 1: what I'm talking about. As you said, this athlete Ma
Speaker 1: told man, you know, and it's like, you know, whoever
Speaker 1: knows what the whole locker room talking and your daughter
Speaker 1: like this is I don't care and that's the way. Damn,
Speaker 1: I don't exactly and and and I when he was speaking,
Speaker 1: it was I knew exactly what he was saying, because
Speaker 1: if you've experienced it, you know. And I went, that's
Speaker 1: why he is so loving. And I mean I could
Speaker 1: literally I could listen to him. You know. Now I
Speaker 1: see him in such a different light because I actually
Speaker 1: refereed him, and I you know, I know him, but
Speaker 1: to hear him talk about his daughter like that, just
Speaker 1: it just showed me a different side of him and Gabrielle.
Speaker 1: It just I went, now, that's being an example of
Speaker 1: a father the way you need to be. Just be
Speaker 1: supportive of your child, regardless of who they are, what
Speaker 1: they want to do, whatever decisions they make. You gotta
Speaker 1: support that. And I went, wow, that was huge. So
Speaker 1: how did you feel about what are your thoughts on
Speaker 1: little nas X video Montera? You know, I kind of
Speaker 1: paid attention to it, and I kind of didn't because
Speaker 1: I really don't get into a lot of the social media,
Speaker 1: you know. I mean, I I pay attention a little bit,
Speaker 1: but I can honestly tell you I really don't have
Speaker 1: a huge comment about it, you know, because I really
Speaker 1: haven't like got into it the way I guess maybe
Speaker 1: I should have or not. I don't know. I've been
Speaker 1: you know, I get caught up in my own life.
Speaker 1: That I have a life, I can honestly tell you.
Speaker 1: It's just it's just talking about where what I received
Speaker 1: from just talking about that bravery and even him in
Speaker 1: the video and a lot of people like, oh, how
Speaker 1: did you defame this and how did you do that?
Speaker 1: And it was just a sense of like he showed
Speaker 1: up as if, however you want to receive him if
Speaker 1: you're saying he's going to hell, so he said, hey,
Speaker 1: let me go to hell. Um let me live what
Speaker 1: my life is. And you know, it's kind of like
Speaker 1: one of those things like, um, maybe back in the
Speaker 1: day they wore hot pants and we call them daisy dudes.
Speaker 1: Now it's just however you choose to show who you are.
Speaker 1: But I just thought that was interesting because it takes
Speaker 1: a lot you think about going in high school and
Speaker 1: you may not even want to come out because you
Speaker 1: just got your as far as your hair because you
Speaker 1: got some new bangs and insecure about what people will say.
Speaker 1: Are just coming out the gym, locker room, in the
Speaker 1: bathing and soon because you may not be comfortable with
Speaker 1: your body and you're talking about the world and the
Speaker 1: world is cruel. Hey what what the world is cruel?
Speaker 1: And it's it's it really is. And you you know,
Speaker 1: you actually have to I think that's where the strength
Speaker 1: comes and in each individual, because you actually have to know,
Speaker 1: have your inner strength to say that whatever my obstacles are,
Speaker 1: I am okay with it, and I'll be okay. And
Speaker 1: I think that's probably the hardest thing for young kids.
Speaker 1: And I and I really, I mean, I command kids today,
Speaker 1: which is so different than when I was growing up,
Speaker 1: because you know, now kids they don't care school, you know,
Speaker 1: they going to the prom. Two guys, two girls, they
Speaker 1: don't you know, we could never do nothing like that.
Speaker 1: It just wasn't even heard of. I think it's wrong.
Speaker 1: I think you shouldn't be able to now come out,
Speaker 1: But I think that you have to say should you should? Well,
Speaker 1: I gotta get a permission to and and but that's
Speaker 1: that's just the world and and that's just who's controlling everything.
Speaker 1: I think. And the good thing is is slowly but surely,
Speaker 1: you know, and you need. You need people like a
Speaker 1: Dwan way. You need people. You do need people like
Speaker 1: that because those are those are people that people listen
Speaker 1: to all the time and they respect. And not to
Speaker 1: say that someone you shouldn't have to be famous to
Speaker 1: have a voice, but those are the voices that everybody
Speaker 1: are listening to. So we you don't really have no choice.
Speaker 1: It should be that it's it doesn't matter who you are.
Speaker 1: That's people would go, you know what, yes, be yourself,
Speaker 1: love yourself, be who you are, be comfortable, and it
Speaker 1: would be okay. But we know in the real in
Speaker 1: the real world, that doesn't that's not necessarily the truth.
Speaker 1: It's not you know, just what you said about knowing
Speaker 1: who you are and inside I was, uh. I just
Speaker 1: posted up this clip, but in a previous episode, I
Speaker 1: had a deja vu and she was just talking about
Speaker 1: she has something called interview coaching, and something that I
Speaker 1: highlighted is that you need to interview even with yourself
Speaker 1: inner view and how you're thinking of like the world
Speaker 1: and how everybody's against you. It's just the enemy in me.
Speaker 1: And it's almost like, you know, when we come to
Speaker 1: the to embrace that, who are we really fighting? And
Speaker 1: we hear so many times your greatest competition is looking
Speaker 1: right back at you. So then it's like when you
Speaker 1: get in that moment of discerning which voices which and
Speaker 1: then choosing which one you're gonna listen to, there you go.
Speaker 1: But here again you know that you can actually, in
Speaker 1: my opinion, that becomes easier when you are living your
Speaker 1: true life. Come on, talk to because if you're living
Speaker 1: your true life, you don't you're not gonna second guess yourself.
Speaker 1: I can honestly tell you that I really there is
Speaker 1: no second guessing because this is it, this is me,
Speaker 1: and whatever I do, I'm gonna do it a hundred
Speaker 1: and I'm gonna give it my all, and I'm gonna
Speaker 1: surround myself with people that are good at what they do,
Speaker 1: that love me, that support what I'm doing, and you go,
Speaker 1: you just you roll with it. I think that's that's
Speaker 1: the one key component where you're able to to be
Speaker 1: your authentic self, you know what I mean. I think
Speaker 1: that's something that once you make that decision, all the
Speaker 1: other decisions are really not that complicated. So what what
Speaker 1: do you think? At what point do we lose that?
Speaker 1: At what point do we deside or subconsciously decide not
Speaker 1: to be who we are. I think you're a lot
Speaker 1: of people is fear. I think it could be, you know,
Speaker 1: for some for some of us, Like in my case,
Speaker 1: a little bit of it was career, you know, I
Speaker 1: was I was really focusing on my career and I
Speaker 1: wanted to go a certain way, and I wanted you know,
Speaker 1: I think for me, it wasn't that I didn't think
Speaker 1: it would go a certain way. I really I didn't want.
Speaker 1: I already had a lot of obstacles when I first
Speaker 1: got in the NBA. I'm a woman, double whammy. I'm
Speaker 1: an Afro from what the double whammy is, I'm a
Speaker 1: woman that I'm an Afro American woman, I'm a lesbian,
Speaker 1: you know, and I'm going into a man's world. So
Speaker 1: you look at all of that, and I'm going, Okay,
Speaker 1: I got all this negative. I'm not gonna put another
Speaker 1: layer on it myself. Not right now. This is and
Speaker 1: this is in the back of my hand. As you
Speaker 1: quoted in previous interviews, you said, the entire world was
Speaker 1: expecting you to fail. God. That was like somebody has
Speaker 1: their hands just strangling you. Just I'm trying to hold on.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to hold on to just me, and I
Speaker 1: didn't at that point in time. And this was my
Speaker 1: being logical. I'm thinking, well, the last thing I need
Speaker 1: to do is come out, because now I got at
Speaker 1: on top of all the other stuff. But here again,
Speaker 1: timing is everything. And it wasn't like I said, and
Speaker 1: had this conscious decision to say I'm not coming out.
Speaker 1: I'm not. No, I didn't. It was one of those
Speaker 1: where no one asked, so I didn't tell. That's nobody
Speaker 1: was wondering why you never brought anybody on the day
Speaker 1: to all of the turn literally turn you would show up. No,
Speaker 1: no mind you I wasn't. That's what I'm saying. If
Speaker 1: if if literally if you know, the guys knew who
Speaker 1: she was, got you know, I didn't hide that part,
Speaker 1: but I still hadn't verbally said it, so we already
Speaker 1: know waiting like, okay, well she didn't say nothing. Nobody
Speaker 1: asked me, I don't have to tell. But you know what, obviously,
Speaker 1: when I decided to make the decision to get married,
Speaker 1: then I'm telling everybody you know. And but I went, okay,
Speaker 1: I guess it's time, you know. And that was those
Speaker 1: were my choices and you know, it was the right
Speaker 1: time for me. Do do I wish, you know, in
Speaker 1: a perfect world, if I would have did it a
Speaker 1: lot sooner, probably, But what would I have looked like different?
Speaker 1: You know, because I just went forward and it was
Speaker 1: it was the perfect time, and it worked. It turned
Speaker 1: out to be the best decision for myself. And I think,
Speaker 1: you know, and I say this to young boys, boys
Speaker 1: and girls all the time, that you have to make
Speaker 1: decisions for you and if you do that, let the
Speaker 1: chips fall where they may, you know, And some of
Speaker 1: it may be good and some of it may be bad.
Speaker 1: But I think overall you're gonna be okay. And I
Speaker 1: look at myself and I'm like, not, not only am
Speaker 1: I okay, I'm doing amazing And all you have to
Speaker 1: do is en roll and to who you are. That's it.
Speaker 1: So do you feel as though that, um, well, I
Speaker 1: guess if you didn't come out and you said that
Speaker 1: every want embraced it. Do you feel as though you
Speaker 1: opened the door for many other people? Did someone else
Speaker 1: come up to you and say, hey, you know, thank
Speaker 1: you for that I can come out as I am.
Speaker 1: Or it wasn't a thing, it was just more so
Speaker 1: you got married and everyone celebrated to you, you know
Speaker 1: what I actually have. I have a lot of women.
Speaker 1: I had a lot of women who actually that are
Speaker 1: in the officiating world actually say you know what, thank you.
Speaker 1: You know, I mean, don I've even had women Afro
Speaker 1: American women who officiate, because you have to realize, when
Speaker 1: you're a referee, it's a very conservative, uh profession, you know,
Speaker 1: because you told the line. You're You're about rules and
Speaker 1: regulations and you have to you know, you gotta stay
Speaker 1: between the lines. You gotta dress a certain way. You can't.
Speaker 1: You know. I've had Afro American women want to talk
Speaker 1: to me about their hair, like, you know, because I've
Speaker 1: changed my hair. If you look at if you look
Speaker 1: at my career from the beginning, you know, if you
Speaker 1: look at my my my hair from the beginning of
Speaker 1: my career till now, it's changed probably twenty times, maybe
Speaker 1: part more times. But I've had women literally want to
Speaker 1: call me and say, hey, you know what, I'm a
Speaker 1: college referee. You know what do you think I could
Speaker 1: I could wear braids, so you think I could have
Speaker 1: my hair dreaded or you think I could you know,
Speaker 1: wear this type of ponytail I said, absolutely, you do
Speaker 1: what's comfortable for you because those that's how we have
Speaker 1: to think. Well you do you know we're when it
Speaker 1: took me, I tell people of from times, it took
Speaker 1: me a while to get these like you when you
Speaker 1: met me, I was a ball blind. Check you understand
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. For us, it's it's it's big, you know,
Speaker 1: because that's a part of who we are. And if
Speaker 1: you can't and like I tell women, I said, look,
Speaker 1: I said, I hear where you are. I said, but
Speaker 1: you know what, Yes you can do it, Yes you can.
Speaker 1: You can you can have you know, your your braids,
Speaker 1: Yes you can have individuals, Yes you can have dreads.
Speaker 1: Embrace whoever you are, whatever you want to do, Embrace it,
Speaker 1: I said, because to go out and be a referee,
Speaker 1: you have to be comfortable. It's you know what I
Speaker 1: want sure about you? How are you gonna be sure
Speaker 1: about what you're saying? And you can't even look in
Speaker 1: the mirror and say, well are you sure about saying?
Speaker 1: There you go, so you understand exactly what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: So this just listen. There's so many different areas where
Speaker 1: there's growth and development and where people where you can
Speaker 1: just be an example for somebody. I mean done. Do
Speaker 1: you really think that I thought about, uh, that I
Speaker 1: was changing my hair that women would notice and you
Speaker 1: know women referees with no Afro American women and they go,
Speaker 1: oh my god, if Violet can do it, I can't too.
Speaker 1: And I could be and I'll be okay, you know.
Speaker 1: And it was just little things like that that I started.
Speaker 1: It started to opening my eyes because glterally, for me,
Speaker 1: I was just being comfortable. You know, I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: being an athlete and having to work out out and
Speaker 1: run and and we you know, we how every American
Speaker 1: women are about their hair. Hello, somebody, thank you? You
Speaker 1: with me. That's a whole another we can go a
Speaker 1: whole another conversation about that. So literally, for me, those
Speaker 1: little bitty things where I noticed I can be an
Speaker 1: example to help some other woman in this profession of officiating, awesome,
Speaker 1: you know what. And I wasn't even thinking at that
Speaker 1: point in time, I'm just changing. I don't know I'm
Speaker 1: doing what I'm calling. I have done research and red
Speaker 1: that never crossed my mind, that even down to the hair,
Speaker 1: and so you know, just reading and anybody that school
Speaker 1: with me that first thing you're thinking of, oh, broke
Speaker 1: Berris is the first female NBA referee, But then think
Speaker 1: about what comes along with being a female, the different
Speaker 1: things that you deal with, such as your hair. How
Speaker 1: about well, but how about being a being the first,
Speaker 1: being a pioneer, being a berry breaker? How about I
Speaker 1: didn't pay attention to any of that. And I think
Speaker 1: you and I kind of we touched on this the
Speaker 1: last time we talked, until years after I was in
Speaker 1: the NBA, because that wasn't the objective. The objective was
Speaker 1: trying to give myself a jaw. I love somebody. I'm
Speaker 1: trying to take care of my family and my kids.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm thinking about working in my career and
Speaker 1: and being successful. I had no idea. Just like Homegirl,
Speaker 1: what Shakari? Uh? Track round? I can't think. What's her
Speaker 1: last name? Jeremiah? The little lady who just won? I
Speaker 1: want to say Richardson, but I can misconstrue that she
Speaker 1: just lost her mother. Just I just saw it this
Speaker 1: morning on on the on Sports Center. She a bad
Speaker 1: about that, she said, not only just thinking about the
Speaker 1: different adversities, and we can touch on that too, but
Speaker 1: just about what you're saying how where your focus was,
Speaker 1: she said, like even coming up, I think like like
Speaker 1: two years with one track. I guess on the collegiate level,
Speaker 1: people are saying, no, you're just a freshman, You're just
Speaker 1: a junior, like you can't do with da da da
Speaker 1: da da. And she said, hold on, hold up, bro
Speaker 1: hold up, whoever you are. When it comes down to it,
Speaker 1: it's me in the clock. Don't matter where I came from,
Speaker 1: what I did. All that matters is all the effort
Speaker 1: that I'm putting in and I execute. Yep, I'm fighting
Speaker 1: against the clock. Hold on, I'm not fighting against none
Speaker 1: of you. And sure enough, when I saw that this morning,
Speaker 1: when when she took off, it was all about the timer.
Speaker 1: Yes we had noticed her hair, yes on your nails,
Speaker 1: But what we're talking about is the time, baby girl
Speaker 1: at the time. But you know what I really in
Speaker 1: watching that after after she ran and she went up
Speaker 1: in the stands and she was hugging her grandmother. Oh god,
Speaker 1: I was just cry. I was done. I totally When
Speaker 1: I saw her go up in the stands and was
Speaker 1: embracing her grandmother, the race was over for me because
Speaker 1: that's what I focused. I said, I girl, that is
Speaker 1: beautiful and it goes along with everything that you're saying.
Speaker 1: That even helps you get to your career, getting to
Speaker 1: the point right now that support that moment of embraced
Speaker 1: because I don't care if you don't speak English. You
Speaker 1: knew what you saw and you still felt it because
Speaker 1: there's nothing that's different from the same thing of what
Speaker 1: your mother said. Love is love. And how about this
Speaker 1: if we if we're looking at the world with everything
Speaker 1: that's going on right now, if people did two things,
Speaker 1: treated their neighbors, are other people the way they would
Speaker 1: want to be treated, number one, and love themselves and
Speaker 1: give it, give it, you know, and of course share it.
Speaker 1: This world we wouldn't we wouldn't have half the issues
Speaker 1: we have right now. Think about it. It's real simple.
Speaker 1: It's not kind of is free. That's the problem, because
Speaker 1: that's what we're missing. If everyone just stopped stop and
Speaker 1: just be kind and say hello, and be generous and
Speaker 1: just love people for who they are and stop looking
Speaker 1: at the outer appearance, to stop looking at what color
Speaker 1: we are or stop stop we would be this world
Speaker 1: would be a different place. But if we could just
Speaker 1: treat each other with mutual respect, I'm like, how complicated.
Speaker 1: Is that get get you know, if we get out
Speaker 1: of our own ways and what we really can't for well,
Speaker 1: some of us can, but for the majority, I think
Speaker 1: that's why we have all the hatred. You know, everything
Speaker 1: that's going on is because you have all this other
Speaker 1: stuff piled on top of it, when all you have
Speaker 1: to do is treat people the way you would want
Speaker 1: to be treated, be kind, be loving, and and and
Speaker 1: let the chips fall where they met. Just thinking as
Speaker 1: you're speaking and talking about Shikari and thinking about how
Speaker 1: you're breaking barrier is the thing that I look at.
Speaker 1: That's just the common threat that I see is that
Speaker 1: you guys were focused on yourself. And I talked about
Speaker 1: this on the Vitamin D podcast. It's the tagline, are
Speaker 1: your greatest asset? You are, you are the thing, you are,
Speaker 1: the ship's nails, you are the foundation. So true. But
Speaker 1: you know what, with all that though, and I don't
Speaker 1: disagree with you, when it comes to being who you
Speaker 1: want to be, getting where you want to get to,
Speaker 1: you still have to do the work. Okay, So what
Speaker 1: does the work look like? It depends it can change.
Speaker 1: My work may be different than yours because it's an
Speaker 1: individual thing and see again that's where that's where most
Speaker 1: of us can't find it. And that's the issue too,
Speaker 1: because we're so busy trying to ask somebody else how
Speaker 1: to live. I tell you on vitaminia, I didn't say
Speaker 1: we unravel and I discovered things. To here, I am
Speaker 1: asking her what it looks like? What does it look
Speaker 1: like to you? Well for me again, I found mine
Speaker 1: right right. I'm just saying to you first been dawn
Speaker 1: like light to you or to you that's listening, I'll
Speaker 1: watch you exactly because that's that's a huge component. And
Speaker 1: and most people, you know, I think having like your podcast,
Speaker 1: which is wonderful because things that we talk about are
Speaker 1: things you talk about with some other celebrity or some
Speaker 1: other person can help, can trigger, can open up and
Speaker 1: shed some lights, shed some light for someone because all
Speaker 1: you mind, you one person at a time. What I said,
Speaker 1: you ain't asking for it. Now, you're good if you
Speaker 1: just if every podcast you can hit one heart, you've
Speaker 1: done your job just one. You know, you make it
Speaker 1: two or three, you make it five, you make it ten.
Speaker 1: Who knows, but someone's gonna listen, and someone's going to
Speaker 1: be able to relate to you. And I right now.
Speaker 1: And that's that's a beautiful thing. And this is that
Speaker 1: what we're doing on this earth, we're here to relate
Speaker 1: and to experience. Wanted to have an exchange, and in
Speaker 1: that relationship of a relating, we create this relationship with
Speaker 1: that love has exchanged. And it was something that you
Speaker 1: said earlier on and you talked about things common a
Speaker 1: full circle, and I think it was talking about timing.
Speaker 1: But the thing that's so beautiful about a circle is
Speaker 1: that when it keeps on moving, there's no definitive start
Speaker 1: or finished. It's just and it's gonna keep going. Because
Speaker 1: you look at the two of us, we're still growing,
Speaker 1: we're still learning, we're still trying to better ourselves, we're
Speaker 1: still trying to to to share love, which I mean,
Speaker 1: you know all it doesn't stop. And that's that's the circle.
Speaker 1: Perhaps that's what it is. Perhaps, you know, like when
Speaker 1: we have um some sort of anxiety or angst about
Speaker 1: you know, what we should subscribe to are the things
Speaker 1: that we do because we're thinking about a finite moment,
Speaker 1: as in like Michael Jackson saying this is it, but
Speaker 1: who wants to say that this is it? This is
Speaker 1: just right now? It's just to start, honestly, right now
Speaker 1: was all that we can really truly bank on. That's
Speaker 1: all we really need right now because that's the gift
Speaker 1: of that is we're not worried about you know, tomorrow, tonight.
Speaker 1: Right now, it's just me and you. It's just being
Speaker 1: who we are, just being present, you know. And it's funny,
Speaker 1: most people don't even know what that means, like just
Speaker 1: be trying to escape constantly looking at other people. And
Speaker 1: it's like, you know, use it as a source of inspiration,
Speaker 1: but you know, up leveling your level of discernment to
Speaker 1: know what is your lane and what is your life
Speaker 1: to live in that correct or be of that. And
Speaker 1: I guess I just hope that you know a lot
Speaker 1: of people realize is that you don't have to wait
Speaker 1: for someone else to define you. You don't have to
Speaker 1: wait for somebody to create your lane. We are beings
Speaker 1: that create life, and that life can look like a career,
Speaker 1: that life can look like a piece of art, it
Speaker 1: can look like your favorite song or a piece of poetry.
Speaker 1: Just create and to know that in this creation process,
Speaker 1: isn't it so freaking interesting? How we can understand an
Speaker 1: abstract portrait but can't even understand our damn selves. Girl stops. Yes,
Speaker 1: that is so true. He don't even make sense. But
Speaker 1: you can stand there and be like, oh, this color
Speaker 1: the emotion. I see how she felt or how he
Speaker 1: felt when he when he when he painted it. But
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, no, no, no, how do you feel
Speaker 1: that you feel that moment you had to step into
Speaker 1: your truth, that moment that you said I'm not subscribing
Speaker 1: to this label, that moment that you stepped out there
Speaker 1: you said, I'm about to be the first female NBA
Speaker 1: referee that had to take a lot because who were
Speaker 1: you looking at to know that you were possible violence?
Speaker 1: You know, um, to be honest, probably my parents, because
Speaker 1: there's nobody else had ever done it. You know. I
Speaker 1: was just I'm I'm kind of going through blindly not knowing.
Speaker 1: All I knew was I understood officiating. I loved it,
Speaker 1: I had the passion for it. I wasn't I was
Speaker 1: an athlete. So I'm like, Okay, if you think I
Speaker 1: can't get up in the floor, up and down the
Speaker 1: floor with these fellas, these big you know, these NBA guys,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do it. So it was almost like fuel
Speaker 1: that you know, I don't know it was my fuel
Speaker 1: exactly because literally you were burning because I wasn't stopping.
Speaker 1: I was like, you know what if you think and
Speaker 1: I even said this, I did one of my other interviews,
Speaker 1: I said, you know what, how about this? I said,
Speaker 1: maybe the NBA, maybe they didn't know what they were
Speaker 1: gonna do when they brought the women in. I said,
Speaker 1: but you know what, they made a big stick because
Speaker 1: I was there to stay how long I was gonna
Speaker 1: make it? And sure enough, again you already know we're
Speaker 1: very powerful. We set our minds to things. If you're
Speaker 1: passion about something, you can do it. And it's I
Speaker 1: was just reading something somebody posted of something like how
Speaker 1: the difference between passion and emotion. Like emotion you can
Speaker 1: feel in that moment, but passion is uncontrollable. You can't
Speaker 1: control it, you can't even go yeah, and you just
Speaker 1: gotta go for it, right. And it's you're funny that
Speaker 1: you say that, because I think with me and and
Speaker 1: and my officials say this to me all the time.
Speaker 1: They go, you can motivate us to do anything, And
Speaker 1: I'm like, why how they go? I don't know? For
Speaker 1: some reason, when you talk and you're in front of
Speaker 1: the rule. We believe you, but you believe you know
Speaker 1: what they and I'm fighting out like just you and
Speaker 1: I having this conversation. They believe me because to leave yourself.
Speaker 1: I believe myself. Catch it. Catch it Vitamin D with
Speaker 1: Dawn Day, catch it. Read all about it. It's on
Speaker 1: the front page. Hey, I love it. Well, you know
Speaker 1: it's funny and I get all you know things, you
Speaker 1: know what things are said to me, and and it
Speaker 1: almost has like a flashback just sitting here talking to you,
Speaker 1: because when you've experienced so many different things, things tie
Speaker 1: together and we don't even realize how they tie together.
Speaker 1: We are the beautiful picture. We are the beautiful We're
Speaker 1: turning everything negative into a positive. That's the vision of it.
Speaker 1: You know, I always tell people all the time, I said,
Speaker 1: what allows the diamond to shign are the multitudes of
Speaker 1: cuts that are in place within it. And they're all
Speaker 1: in it, the pressure and all these imperfections. But guess what,
Speaker 1: Just like you said, you decide to believe in yourself,
Speaker 1: decided to have that interview with the endemy, and you said,
Speaker 1: let me stop for in the light. Guess what boom
Speaker 1: the lighthead and just when you thought because maybe I
Speaker 1: wasn't outspoken, or maybe somebody had criticized for my sexuality,
Speaker 1: or maybe because I stood out there and did my hair,
Speaker 1: that might just start bouncing off and then people start
Speaker 1: looking at you like, oh my god, there we go.
Speaker 1: That's violence that I could do it. See if she
Speaker 1: could do it, I can do it. Or if you
Speaker 1: know she did it, it's a possibility for me and
Speaker 1: whatever I'm doing. And again, yeah we're talking out officiating,
Speaker 1: but it really doesn't matter. It's way bigger because it doesn't.
Speaker 1: This goes for anything that anyone is trying to do, period, period.
Speaker 1: And the thing that also that I think is so key,
Speaker 1: that's so key that I want to make sure that
Speaker 1: people catch it, is that none of this would have
Speaker 1: been possible if you didn't embrace who you are. You
Speaker 1: know that this wouldn't even be a conversation. It wouldn't
Speaker 1: because when you are your authentic self, nothing else matters.
Speaker 1: It does because you know the truth by the way
Speaker 1: it feels that was ntr read. And I don't have
Speaker 1: anything to subscribe to meet the measurement too, because I
Speaker 1: am the line, I am the bar, and I decided
Speaker 1: to meet it. I meet it. And it's funny when
Speaker 1: when you when you call, if we talked, we've had
Speaker 1: our talks and I can always go back to don
Speaker 1: that that night when we were together and I said,
Speaker 1: I think when you call me and I said, you
Speaker 1: better do it, and it's like I need to have
Speaker 1: you on. Okay, you better do it because you're you're
Speaker 1: doing it every day and that is that is wonderful
Speaker 1: because again you have this vision, you have this dream,
Speaker 1: and here you are, here I am, and here's the
Speaker 1: thing like people have been talking about the vision. I
Speaker 1: think maybe the thing that people stop on their dreams
Speaker 1: and just feeling like that stuff, like I said, trying
Speaker 1: to figure out what the picture is gonna look like
Speaker 1: and just forgetting the process of development. Even the picture
Speaker 1: had to be in a dark moment to go just
Speaker 1: like that seed in the ground, to grow, to get
Speaker 1: your nutrients, to get everything that you are so then
Speaker 1: when it's time to position yourself to blossom to bloom,
Speaker 1: Oh my, the beauty in it. And it's it's that
Speaker 1: thing that you said you didn't know exactly what. When
Speaker 1: I was to the comforter in New York when my
Speaker 1: USB microphone, I didn't know that the process was gonna here,
Speaker 1: but I knew what vitamin D was gonna be because
Speaker 1: it was the passion. Because I can't tell you how
Speaker 1: many times in different obstacles have come my way, even
Speaker 1: just releasing my job working with Steve Harvey Morning Show,
Speaker 1: and I'm sure that was very, very scary, and I
Speaker 1: you know, I got a little frustrated with myself because
Speaker 1: you know, here I am. I hadn't lived in New
Speaker 1: York from Detroit, so it was nothing for me to
Speaker 1: just get up and move into d C to go
Speaker 1: to Howard. And I didn't know what happened when I
Speaker 1: got to New York, but I was there even down
Speaker 1: to come into l A. Do you know, I came
Speaker 1: to visit and I know I want to be here
Speaker 1: because of entertainment, like the voice overs, acting, the hosting,
Speaker 1: all that kind of stuff. Um, but the drive that
Speaker 1: said I wasn't working and I said I wanted to
Speaker 1: live somewhere with palm trees, and and just because I
Speaker 1: decided to put at one ft in front of the other.
Speaker 1: And but how about this. You never said that you
Speaker 1: didn't have stumbling blocks. That's what I never said. It
Speaker 1: wasn't difficult. That's what you never said. You didn't have disappointment.
Speaker 1: You see, I'm listening. You never said any of those things,
Speaker 1: but that never stopped you never And even in my
Speaker 1: frustration of deciding to leave the Steve Irvan want to show,
Speaker 1: I got upset with myself because I said, don what
Speaker 1: have you ever felt that you want gangster, that you
Speaker 1: needed somebody else to attach you on, to do to
Speaker 1: do you? But if I hadn't stepped away from that,
Speaker 1: we wouldn't even be Whitey. It wouldn't even came an
Speaker 1: opportunity to say, hey, can I get the studio from
Speaker 1: my podcast? And it's something when you can believe in
Speaker 1: yourself that much, that same notion of your saying that
Speaker 1: you give permission to other people to believe in themselves.
Speaker 1: You're an example. Hey. And here's the thing, even going
Speaker 1: back to what you said with the scripture of treating
Speaker 1: your neighbor, how you treat yourself, and if you can
Speaker 1: learn to love yourself and to walk, you understand what
Speaker 1: it takes, you understand what it means to have a dream,
Speaker 1: to have a voice, to exist, to be received, to
Speaker 1: be loved. It's almost like if I feel this and
Speaker 1: it feels good. Why wouldn't I want to give it
Speaker 1: to you. You have to see that. That's the thing.
Speaker 1: That's why I tell people. I go, I am I
Speaker 1: am here two be an example. And I say this
Speaker 1: to my my officials, and they just go, man, I go,
Speaker 1: I am here to be an example. I am here
Speaker 1: to support. But you know what, you have to do
Speaker 1: the work. I can't do that for you. I've already
Speaker 1: done mine. I got mine. I tell him, I said,
Speaker 1: I got mine. I'm gonna try to help you. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna try to help all of you get yours to
Speaker 1: wherever you need, wherever you're trying to get to. I've
Speaker 1: already been to the top. And I say, once you
Speaker 1: get to the top, there's only one direction you can
Speaker 1: That's it. What you when you what does that mean? No?
Speaker 1: I mean it's not bad though. See. And this is
Speaker 1: the thing. When you're moving up a ladder, dog and
Speaker 1: everybody has their time. When you're moving up that ladder,
Speaker 1: and you get to the top of whatever career, whatever aspiratials,
Speaker 1: wherever you're trying to go, there's only one direction you
Speaker 1: can go. Once you get there. I'm talking about when
Speaker 1: you make it is you got to come down the
Speaker 1: other side. And when you come down the other side,
Speaker 1: now we look at how have you treated people, how
Speaker 1: you've been what type of person are you? Because when
Speaker 1: you're going this other direction, things are still good for you.
Speaker 1: And it doesn't mean, as I say down, because maybe
Speaker 1: you gotta go up somewhere else. This is something else
Speaker 1: may come in your path. But it's how how you
Speaker 1: treated people on that on that climb, because when you're
Speaker 1: going on, when you're now on the other side, on
Speaker 1: the other side, those same people are still there. So again,
Speaker 1: if you were not a good person, stepped over people,
Speaker 1: treated people, you know, uh, not kind whatever it may be,
Speaker 1: not professional, what you got a problem. And that's why
Speaker 1: I go no, no, no, no, no one thing I
Speaker 1: tell you. And this is a good example because I
Speaker 1: went the NBA referee my twenty years. I came from
Speaker 1: the n c a A women's college basketball. When I
Speaker 1: got finished with the NBA and my career, my officiating
Speaker 1: career was over, I came right on back over to
Speaker 1: the n c a A on the you know, and
Speaker 1: when I appreciating, which I'm doing now, because I treated
Speaker 1: I didn't, I didn't I didn't burn any bridges. I
Speaker 1: treated people with kindness. I was always still supportive. So
Speaker 1: of course once I went them, you know, took my
Speaker 1: my my ladder up, and now I wanted to make
Speaker 1: another transition. They were open arms like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: this is what we need. Oh yes, please come and
Speaker 1: here I am a man, so you know, so it's
Speaker 1: like it's it's it's like my career. My career didn't
Speaker 1: it didn't stop, it just kind of changed a little bit.
Speaker 1: And it's it's actually I feel it's more rewarding being
Speaker 1: on this side because and now I'm able to really
Speaker 1: teach referees, support referees, watch them prosper, watch them grow.
Speaker 1: You know. I feel like when I get to the
Speaker 1: n c A and that the final fours and my
Speaker 1: referees out there working, I feel like a problem mother.
Speaker 1: I mean seriously, and I say this all the time.
Speaker 1: I go, you know what, Lord, if how about this?
Speaker 1: If you allowed me to have the career that I had,
Speaker 1: and now I can supervise and teach and mentor and
Speaker 1: train and share all the knowledge and my passion that
Speaker 1: I have had in my life in my career here
Speaker 1: and I can now give it to someone else so
Speaker 1: they can see that they are possible. So how has
Speaker 1: that been as far as I shouldn't say holding that weight,
Speaker 1: but being that example for women coming in the business,
Speaker 1: because there's a lot of things that people are told
Speaker 1: to humble yourselves or a lady doesn't act like that,
Speaker 1: or this is part of the boys club, Like what
Speaker 1: wasn't inside of you that said, hey, I need to
Speaker 1: be that for these young people. Because I'm wondering who
Speaker 1: was that for? You know, I can honestly say it's
Speaker 1: my parents. I think I was. I was raised um
Speaker 1: my mom and dad were always extremely supportive on whatever
Speaker 1: whatever we wanted to do. And it wasn't just me,
Speaker 1: it's my my brother, my sister's, my nephew. It really
Speaker 1: didn't matter. And I think for me having that close
Speaker 1: net family support, I was never afraid. We were always told,
Speaker 1: you know what, smart, you can do anything. You know what,
Speaker 1: just be a good person, treat people with kindness, treat
Speaker 1: people with love and respect, and let the chips fall.
Speaker 1: And I think for me that has been kind of
Speaker 1: my just core values and whatever I do and it
Speaker 1: it really it really doesn't matter. And I think that
Speaker 1: has been the one true component to my life that. Um,
Speaker 1: I look at now and go, I am doing exactly
Speaker 1: what I was support what I what I should be doing.
Speaker 1: Oh well, you know how many people can't say that?
Speaker 1: I know it's a lot of people can I I
Speaker 1: really can. I am truly living. I can't even say
Speaker 1: my best life because it's always good. It's not my best.
Speaker 1: It is my life period, and it's amazing. Right wed.
Speaker 1: It's just interesting what you just said right there. We're
Speaker 1: getting this situation is trying to label what's the best moment.
Speaker 1: This is all of you. It's all of it. Everything,
Speaker 1: Embrace every little bit of it, everything, no matter where
Speaker 1: it can style. Oh wow, So what would you say
Speaker 1: to whether you know a queer athlete? Are referees consider
Speaker 1: athletes as we are because athletes I'm again again, okay,
Speaker 1: what would you say as some advice for a queer
Speaker 1: athlete that's looking to come out or what would you say?
Speaker 1: What would you say to them, anybody athlete or not?
Speaker 1: What would you say? I would say that, you know what,
Speaker 1: it's everybody's time is different, um, and it's up to
Speaker 1: each individual person. I said, But I and I would
Speaker 1: just share my story if they you know, if they
Speaker 1: wanted to hear, you know, my own testimony and what
Speaker 1: I went through and just share that coming out just
Speaker 1: it just relieves so much pressure, I think. And then
Speaker 1: it allowed me to be able to out talk about
Speaker 1: my life. Because when you're around professionals and you you're
Speaker 1: around people that you work with, and you're not able
Speaker 1: to be your true authentic self, you're holding something back.
Speaker 1: It's like, yeah, you got it, you are you know
Speaker 1: what happens with even aneurysms, heart attacks, Thank you all
Speaker 1: of it. And I think once for myself, once I
Speaker 1: released all that, uh, nothing else mattered. It was about
Speaker 1: being me here in de'angelo. Nothing matters that there, girl,
Speaker 1: you gotta go one for everything. But but really, and
Speaker 1: it's it's really it's not like some big epiphany or
Speaker 1: or nothing like that. It's just that you you actually
Speaker 1: now feel free to be able to just be who
Speaker 1: you are. Thank God all you know. But but literally
Speaker 1: for me, that's really what it did. For me. For yourself,
Speaker 1: it did, and it it just opened up so many
Speaker 1: different things and good feelings and and and talking with
Speaker 1: different people, I go, man, this is this is good,
Speaker 1: you know. And I'm sure for some people maybe their
Speaker 1: experiences maybe a little different. But here again, I'm looking
Speaker 1: at me and I look at what you give out.
Speaker 1: It's what you get back. And literally for me, that's
Speaker 1: really how it's not that complicated for me, you know,
Speaker 1: it is pretty easy. Wow, well you've definitely inspired me
Speaker 1: because I can just think of the different things in
Speaker 1: my life that you know, like you said, being in
Speaker 1: the business, like, oh, shoot, I have been drinking this,
Speaker 1: Do I take a picture with this? Oh if I
Speaker 1: smoke something, I see that. Oh if I like this person,
Speaker 1: doesn't mean you know, it's just just be done. That's it.
Speaker 1: And that's why I try to keep it clear. Because
Speaker 1: I said I'm gonna be big in an Oprah that's
Speaker 1: vitamin D is about to change. You better do a girl.
Speaker 1: And just because we're talking about some inspiration, I'm still done.
Speaker 1: So don't get the message confused with the messenger. Don't
Speaker 1: try to subscribe me and say I'm not gonna curse.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna do that, because that's not what it's about.
Speaker 1: It's about me just showing up and it just it's
Speaker 1: taking it. I'm still in the process of figuring out
Speaker 1: if I want to say in my lines or in
Speaker 1: my bounds, where I am and where I like to play,
Speaker 1: and if I'm playing in a pain today, I'm playing
Speaker 1: in a pain okay. And you can do that and
Speaker 1: that bemind you this is you and that you're being
Speaker 1: your authentic self. And as long as you do that,
Speaker 1: this is going to thrive as it's doing as we're sitting. Amen. Amen. Okay.
Speaker 1: So I thought a little game, got a game. I
Speaker 1: was like, how can we merge both worlds of being
Speaker 1: inspiring and then basketball. So this is the first time
Speaker 1: I've implemented this. That's right here. Jeremiah and I are
Speaker 1: still working on the name of it. This could be
Speaker 1: the vitamin chews, the vita box. Anyway, you never know
Speaker 1: what you're gonna get in the brown box. Get your
Speaker 1: neutrin is here, so I have to catch up, pick
Speaker 1: it up like no in here. I put some times
Speaker 1: in the year in this chest and what I want
Speaker 1: you to do. These are basketball times. So it's nothing
Speaker 1: that you haven't heard, okay. But the twist that we're
Speaker 1: gonna do is that I want you to give me. Um.
Speaker 1: We're leading to something inspirational with life, okay. And if
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have you pull one if you get stuck,
Speaker 1: I'll pull one and then I'll tell you how I
Speaker 1: can relate it to something inspiring. Okay, we're opening the box.
Speaker 1: The box is open. Okay, mix it up. Go ahead,
Speaker 1: look little car uh okay opening up. She's opening. What
Speaker 1: does it say? Ali? And I knew you were going
Speaker 1: to pick that. I promised to God, I said, I
Speaker 1: promised to God. I said it in my head. I
Speaker 1: promise you. I promise you. But go ahead. Well, you
Speaker 1: know what alley you in the basketball term is when
Speaker 1: you throw the ball up to the rim and you're
Speaker 1: throw it like I'm throwing at the Jeremiah and he
Speaker 1: actually just catches it and he dunks it. That's that's
Speaker 1: the alley oop. And I think if I think about
Speaker 1: alley oop and just something that I can relate to
Speaker 1: life is that when you do an alley oop, you
Speaker 1: gotta jump. And I think for a lot of us
Speaker 1: were afraid to just have that leap of faith. And
Speaker 1: you have to trust yourself. You have to trust your training,
Speaker 1: you have to entrust you know how you were raised.
Speaker 1: You have to trust and trust your values, and you
Speaker 1: take all of that and you just jump and follow
Speaker 1: your heart, your passion, your dream, and you go for it.
Speaker 1: And that's what I got out of all you. Gosh,
Speaker 1: that was so good to her head? That was good,
Speaker 1: wasn't it? That was pretty nice? That was Do you
Speaker 1: want to do another one? If you just I'm curious.
Speaker 1: We're learning. Yeah, one more and one more. Like you said,
Speaker 1: it's the first time you pulled it out first, it
Speaker 1: ain't the first time. I'm the first. It's something recognize that.
Speaker 1: Let's see what we got. Oh, this one is carry
Speaker 1: interesting and carry it in in. In the basketball term,
Speaker 1: is that you when you're dribbling right, you can't take
Speaker 1: your hand underneath the ball and then take it back
Speaker 1: because that's a violation. Caring is when you moved two
Speaker 1: steps and you didn't trouble that traveling so well. And
Speaker 1: actually they're both of violations though so they're very similar.
Speaker 1: But this particular one is holding them when you you
Speaker 1: have to dribble like this right, and if a if
Speaker 1: a player literally trying to make his move or she's
Speaker 1: trying to make her move and they take their palm
Speaker 1: and they hold it for a second and then go again,
Speaker 1: that's the violation because that's an illegal dribble. So when
Speaker 1: I think of carrying, and I think of just life
Speaker 1: is that it's a violation, and that in life you
Speaker 1: have to know where your boundaries are and the things
Speaker 1: that you can do that can get you in trouble,
Speaker 1: and the things that you can do that are safe,
Speaker 1: that are clean. And I think when I think of
Speaker 1: carry that's what I look at. I said, you know,
Speaker 1: for I would say to a young kid, I said, look,
Speaker 1: you know what you have to be careful about, but
Speaker 1: you who are your friends? You have to be careful
Speaker 1: about who you're hanging around. You have to be careful
Speaker 1: about your surroundings because you can be real innocent and
Speaker 1: you end up with the wrong violation and you end
Speaker 1: up in the wrong place. So that was just off
Speaker 1: the top of my okay, because this because we gotta
Speaker 1: do free? What you know? That one, because it was
Speaker 1: so good to your mind and your minds like, oh
Speaker 1: this is good, Okay, this is really amazing. Pass Okay.
Speaker 1: This one I think everybody kind of probably really would
Speaker 1: know what this one is. Is that of course, obviously
Speaker 1: we dribble, and once you pick the ball up, you
Speaker 1: cannot dribble it again. You actually have to pass it,
Speaker 1: pass or shoot or this would be a violation as well.
Speaker 1: So looking at just thinking about pass and and just
Speaker 1: life is that UM for me personally, I would look
Speaker 1: at this and go I would never want any opportunity
Speaker 1: in my life to pass me by, So I would
Speaker 1: make sure that I've done the work. I would make
Speaker 1: sure that I prepared myself. I would make sure that
Speaker 1: I am physically ready mentally physically to do whatever it
Speaker 1: is I need to do, because I know that when
Speaker 1: that opportunity presents itself to me, it will not pass
Speaker 1: me by. I love your work on and off the court.
Speaker 1: Hell love, thank you. That's fun. That was Yeah, that
Speaker 1: just came up. Jeremiah was like, yeah, we should do
Speaker 1: something with terms and then I was like, okay, let
Speaker 1: me infiltrate that. I'm telling you, he's amazing. UM, so
Speaker 1: thank you for that. I don't know what I expected
Speaker 1: the second time around, like how it was going to
Speaker 1: be different, But this was amazing. It was everything that
Speaker 1: I feel that it was supposed to be. You know,
Speaker 1: it's so awesome that I think I enjoyed even more
Speaker 1: is that it was nothing like the first one. That's
Speaker 1: what's awesome. I mean, you know, and I guess that's
Speaker 1: what it's that's the way it's supposed to be. That
Speaker 1: our first one. This one was just so different, but
Speaker 1: it was awesome right right, and something was still you know, received,
Speaker 1: and I think people are just seeing another layer of
Speaker 1: who Queen v is why you are the queen of
Speaker 1: your core? Oh you know what, thank you so much.
Speaker 1: That was well, thank you, and I again it's you
Speaker 1: because you we just sit here and we just do
Speaker 1: so it's you each other. Queen. Yeah, yeah, so I
Speaker 1: would ask you what your dose of vitamin DI is,
Speaker 1: but I feel as though you got something You've left it,
Speaker 1: you know, made Martin Hello. It's like Beyonce say, I
Speaker 1: was here, I live, I learned, I love it. I
Speaker 1: did everything, I imagine. Anyway, So if someone has heard you,
Speaker 1: which the world has, and they just want to follow you,
Speaker 1: tell us you know what you have going on that
Speaker 1: they can check you out with where they can follow
Speaker 1: you on social media? Well obviously you know my Instagram,
Speaker 1: I'm NBA Underscore Lashes and you can you know, I
Speaker 1: you can follow me. Um. I think everything is kind
Speaker 1: of on there. I am in the process right now.
Speaker 1: I'm working on my my website, uh to kind of
Speaker 1: get my my motivational speaking going, because that's the one
Speaker 1: part I'm gonna start trying to work on my foundation
Speaker 1: while the Palmer the game changer, Hello somebody. Yeah, so uh,
Speaker 1: just a just a few other things to add to
Speaker 1: what I'm doing, you know, in officiating and supervising and
Speaker 1: all that things. So that would kind of be my
Speaker 1: my the other part of the new me. Hey, oh
Speaker 1: my gosh, Well I love it and I'll receive it,
Speaker 1: and I just hope that everyone else, um understands the
Speaker 1: magnitude of all what you had to say. Thank you,
Speaker 1: because love is love, absolutely back and proud you said
Speaker 1: it live. You know what, I guess I was supposed
Speaker 1: to wear this today because you know what we took.
Speaker 1: Everything started from my from my shirt on the moment
Speaker 1: I said how long shirt, thank you and I just work.
Speaker 1: I just I was like, but what you did was
Speaker 1: you felt you wanted to work what makes you feel good,
Speaker 1: you know, and started a whole lot thing we did
Speaker 1: and lives today, I hope, so I really do. Oh man,
Speaker 1: thank you, You're more than whether you heard it right
Speaker 1: here NBA's first female whereforee while many of the barriers
Speaker 1: that have been discussed before, have been talked about what's
Speaker 1: happened literally on the court, but I'm telling you after
Speaker 1: this conversation, just learning and understanding and seeing how many
Speaker 1: barriers were broken off the court and really understanding how
Speaker 1: the foundation and what it stems from is love. May
Speaker 1: we get to the point that we learned to love
Speaker 1: ourselves and that is going to entail for us to
Speaker 1: see ourselves and to truly see to really get an
Speaker 1: interview as to who you are. Because when you show
Speaker 1: up as you are, you give yourself permission to be
Speaker 1: who you are as you are right now because you
Speaker 1: are who you are. So let it be something that
Speaker 1: inspires you. Let it be something that carries you on
Speaker 1: your way, and do not pass on the opportunity to
Speaker 1: ali oop to your d wildest dreams. Catch it and
Speaker 1: in the meantime, in between time, if you would like to, uh,
Speaker 1: stay abre us to what I have on, If you
Speaker 1: would like to get some more inspiration in your life,
Speaker 1: I want to encourage you to follow me at Dawn
Speaker 1: day Speaks on all social media, okay, and also this
Speaker 1: interview is going to be up on the YouTube channel,
Speaker 1: so make sure you check it out at Dawn Day
Speaker 1: speak so you can get a visual of all what's
Speaker 1: going on. And also, if you're enjoying this, if you've
Speaker 1: been inspired, if you feel compelled and you want to
Speaker 1: shout it out loud, make sure you tell your friends
Speaker 1: to tell their friends to tell them and their friends
Speaker 1: about the podcast. Okay, because bidamin d is going global. Okay.
Speaker 1: I'm in the business and making dreams come true and
Speaker 1: I'm certainly not forgetting about mine. Can you support me?
Speaker 1: I appreciate you, so follow me. I'm gonna be there.
Speaker 1: You know. We do this every week, all the time,
Speaker 1: around the time because now it's the best time. And um,
Speaker 1: I want you to always remember that you are your
Speaker 1: greatest ass at