1
00:00:01,240 --> 00:00:06,720
Speaker 1: Once again, attention, Steve Harvey. Nation voter registration is down.

2
00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:11,280
Speaker 1: We cannot stress that enough. Voter registration is down. Please

3
00:00:11,320 --> 00:00:14,320
Speaker 1: go get registered to vote right now. You can go

4
00:00:14,360 --> 00:00:18,239
Speaker 1: to our forever first Lady Michelle Obama's voter initiative website

5
00:00:18,360 --> 00:00:21,880
Speaker 1: is called when we All Vote dot org. When we

6
00:00:22,040 --> 00:00:26,000
Speaker 1: all vote dot org, please take the next step. We

7
00:00:26,079 --> 00:00:28,800
Speaker 1: need to hear your voice, make your voice heard. We

8
00:00:28,920 --> 00:00:32,040
Speaker 1: have to do our part when we all vote dot org. Okay,

9
00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:36,239
Speaker 1: time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if you need

10
00:00:36,280 --> 00:00:40,680
Speaker 1: advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more. Please

11
00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:45,400
Speaker 1: submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com and

12
00:00:45,840 --> 00:00:48,559
Speaker 1: we'll read your letter who knows live on the air,

13
00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:51,479
Speaker 1: just like we're gonna read this one right here, right now.

14
00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:54,400
Speaker 1: Muggle up, hold on tight, We got it for you. Here.

15
00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:57,720
Speaker 1: It is the Strawberry Letter. All right, nephew, thank you.

16
00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:01,680
Speaker 1: Subject Why must he continue to text other women? Dear

17
00:01:01,760 --> 00:01:05,120
Speaker 1: Stephen Shirley, I've been with my husband for six years

18
00:01:05,280 --> 00:01:08,200
Speaker 1: and we've been married for two years. I have myself

19
00:01:08,240 --> 00:01:10,880
Speaker 1: to blame for what I'm going through now because it

20
00:01:10,959 --> 00:01:14,720
Speaker 1: was an issue before we got married. My husband has

21
00:01:14,720 --> 00:01:19,039
Speaker 1: a problem with texting and talking to other females. When

22
00:01:19,040 --> 00:01:22,399
Speaker 1: I've addressed the issue with him, he always says nothing

23
00:01:22,520 --> 00:01:25,319
Speaker 1: is wrong with texting and talking as long as I'm

24
00:01:25,360 --> 00:01:28,640
Speaker 1: not crossing the line or trying to date anybody. I

25
00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:31,200
Speaker 1: believe that if one of the women he talks to

26
00:01:31,400 --> 00:01:34,480
Speaker 1: or Texas comes on to him, then he will take

27
00:01:34,520 --> 00:01:38,280
Speaker 1: them up on the offer. I have busted him numerous times,

28
00:01:38,680 --> 00:01:43,520
Speaker 1: and then he'll block the lady's number. But he's so clueless.

29
00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:47,120
Speaker 1: I can go to his block messages and still read

30
00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:50,240
Speaker 1: those two. He will delete his text messages from the

31
00:01:50,480 --> 00:01:53,720
Speaker 1: entire day before he gets home, and when I check

32
00:01:53,800 --> 00:01:57,280
Speaker 1: his phone, his text messages, his text message and call

33
00:01:57,360 --> 00:02:00,800
Speaker 1: logs are blank. If he changes his pass code on

34
00:02:00,840 --> 00:02:04,440
Speaker 1: the phone, it's an immediate argument. The last time I

35
00:02:04,520 --> 00:02:07,680
Speaker 1: caught him texting a lady, I called her and told

36
00:02:07,720 --> 00:02:11,120
Speaker 1: her he's married. She said she had no idea that

37
00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:15,480
Speaker 1: he was married, and she said he never got inappropriate

38
00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:19,320
Speaker 1: with her because she is married too. She apologized to me,

39
00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:21,840
Speaker 1: and I told her no need. I just wanted her

40
00:02:21,840 --> 00:02:24,880
Speaker 1: to know how my husband operates. I told her that

41
00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:27,880
Speaker 1: he'd probably be reaching out to her again soon. She

42
00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:30,680
Speaker 1: screenshot all of the texts he sent to her and

43
00:02:30,720 --> 00:02:34,120
Speaker 1: they were innocent, But I'm no fool. Isn't that the

44
00:02:34,160 --> 00:02:37,960
Speaker 1: way it starts with an innocent text, They get acquainted

45
00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:41,200
Speaker 1: on the phone, they meet somewhere, and then bam, they're

46
00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:45,000
Speaker 1: having sex. It's disrespectful and he doesn't see it that way.

47
00:02:45,240 --> 00:02:48,040
Speaker 1: Isn't texting and talking a form of cheating? Or could

48
00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:53,280
Speaker 1: I be overthinking this? Wow? A lot's going on in

49
00:02:53,280 --> 00:02:57,399
Speaker 1: this letter. I'll start out this way and ask you,

50
00:02:57,600 --> 00:03:00,480
Speaker 1: why are you questioning and doubting yourself? I mean, your

51
00:03:00,520 --> 00:03:04,040
Speaker 1: instincts are good, right, and something doesn't feel right to you,

52
00:03:04,400 --> 00:03:07,080
Speaker 1: and you've checked him on it several times. You've you've

53
00:03:07,160 --> 00:03:11,080
Speaker 1: checked his phone, you've checked him in person when he

54
00:03:11,120 --> 00:03:13,440
Speaker 1: gets home from work, you're checking his phone. You don't

55
00:03:13,440 --> 00:03:16,960
Speaker 1: trust him at all, But I mean it's okay to

56
00:03:17,160 --> 00:03:19,840
Speaker 1: check him. It really is okay. It's all right if

57
00:03:19,880 --> 00:03:22,880
Speaker 1: you don't like him talking and texting to other texting

58
00:03:22,919 --> 00:03:25,360
Speaker 1: other women. You do have every right to feel that

59
00:03:25,400 --> 00:03:28,640
Speaker 1: way that you don't like it, you know, So, I

60
00:03:28,639 --> 00:03:31,120
Speaker 1: don't think you're overthinking here. I think you are doing

61
00:03:31,360 --> 00:03:34,440
Speaker 1: a bit much with taking his phone and all of that.

62
00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:39,760
Speaker 1: But again, you don't trust him, and him as your

63
00:03:39,880 --> 00:03:43,160
Speaker 1: husband should not ignore or dismiss your feelings, and he

64
00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:45,720
Speaker 1: should not take sides with these other women. I mean,

65
00:03:45,920 --> 00:03:48,160
Speaker 1: because that's what he's doing. When he's telling you it's

66
00:03:48,200 --> 00:03:51,560
Speaker 1: okay and all of that, you don't feel right about it,

67
00:03:51,640 --> 00:03:54,280
Speaker 1: So why is he taking their side? The problem is

68
00:03:54,320 --> 00:03:58,120
Speaker 1: that you said he did this before you, guys got married.

69
00:03:58,320 --> 00:04:01,840
Speaker 1: That's the problem. You ignored that blaring red flag. You

70
00:04:01,920 --> 00:04:04,680
Speaker 1: ignored it. It It was right there. You probably thought, like

71
00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:06,840
Speaker 1: a lot of women, that he was gonna stop doing

72
00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:09,160
Speaker 1: it once you got married, or he was gonna change.

73
00:04:09,520 --> 00:04:11,520
Speaker 1: You know, we always think we could change the guy.

74
00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:14,720
Speaker 1: This should not be an issue, though. I just really

75
00:04:14,720 --> 00:04:16,599
Speaker 1: don't think this should be an issue, because it's a

76
00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:20,760
Speaker 1: small thing in the grand scheme of things for you

77
00:04:20,839 --> 00:04:23,880
Speaker 1: in your marriage. I think your husband should give it up.

78
00:04:23,920 --> 00:04:28,000
Speaker 1: I really do all that erasing text messages before he

79
00:04:28,040 --> 00:04:30,800
Speaker 1: gets home and all of that, come on, Who wants

80
00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:33,719
Speaker 1: to go through that every day? But I guess he

81
00:04:33,760 --> 00:04:35,880
Speaker 1: has to. If you're gonna check his phone, he can

82
00:04:35,920 --> 00:04:38,679
Speaker 1: put your mind at ease and you can really trust

83
00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:40,760
Speaker 1: him again if he just stops this one little thing.

84
00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:43,280
Speaker 1: I think it's a small sacrifice for a happy marriage.

85
00:04:43,520 --> 00:04:46,240
Speaker 1: And yes, to answer your question, there is a such

86
00:04:46,279 --> 00:04:49,600
Speaker 1: thing as emotional cheating and all of that. You know,

87
00:04:49,960 --> 00:04:52,960
Speaker 1: even if he is just texting and talking to a person,

88
00:04:53,279 --> 00:04:56,400
Speaker 1: you know you're you have some sort of emotional investment

89
00:04:56,440 --> 00:04:58,040
Speaker 1: in it. So if you don't like it, I think

90
00:04:58,080 --> 00:05:00,600
Speaker 1: he should stop because you do not and it makes

91
00:05:00,640 --> 00:05:06,560
Speaker 1: you uncomfortable. Steve, I'm really struggle with this letter on

92
00:05:06,760 --> 00:05:12,400
Speaker 1: several levels. From her standpoint, from his standpoint, from their standpoint.

93
00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:16,400
Speaker 1: The subject is why must he continue to text other women?

94
00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:22,040
Speaker 1: Let's just answer that question. Because he liked it, because

95
00:05:22,040 --> 00:05:27,080
Speaker 1: it feel good to it. He is enjoying himself, He's

96
00:05:27,120 --> 00:05:31,840
Speaker 1: getting something out of it. That's something he's getting out

97
00:05:31,839 --> 00:05:35,520
Speaker 1: of it that he likes, and it's the exchange between

98
00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:38,919
Speaker 1: him and the other women. You're not having trouble with

99
00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:44,080
Speaker 1: him texting guys. You're having trouble with him texting women. Now,

100
00:05:44,680 --> 00:05:48,080
Speaker 1: when you address the issue, he always say, ain't nothing

101
00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:50,760
Speaker 1: wrong with texting and talking as long as I'm not

102
00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:54,000
Speaker 1: crossing the line or trying to date anybody. Well, then

103
00:05:54,120 --> 00:05:57,159
Speaker 1: later on in the letter you say that he'll block

104
00:05:57,200 --> 00:06:00,520
Speaker 1: a lady's number, but he's clueless. You can go to

105
00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:04,799
Speaker 1: his block messages and still read them too. I've done,

106
00:06:04,920 --> 00:06:08,599
Speaker 1: is this, dude? Yeah? Then you say he'll delete his

107
00:06:08,680 --> 00:06:12,080
Speaker 1: text messages from the entire day when he gets home.

108
00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:14,960
Speaker 1: When I check his phone, his text message and call

109
00:06:15,080 --> 00:06:19,200
Speaker 1: logs are blank. Ain't nobody got to sell phone? Ain't

110
00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:24,320
Speaker 1: nobody call ass all damn day. So, now, if it

111
00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:27,080
Speaker 1: is innocent, like he say, if ain't nothing wrong with

112
00:06:27,200 --> 00:06:30,839
Speaker 1: texting and talking, why you erase it? Right? It's not

113
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:34,960
Speaker 1: just because you'll see he'd been doing it all these texts.

114
00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:38,800
Speaker 1: Ain't innocent. I can tell you that right now. Hold on, Steve,

115
00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:42,480
Speaker 1: hold on Part two of your response coming up at

116
00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:46,560
Speaker 1: twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's subject is why

117
00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:49,520
Speaker 1: must he continue to text other women? We'll be back

118
00:06:49,520 --> 00:06:52,200
Speaker 1: with more of the Strawberry Letter Part two right after this.

119
00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:56,800
Speaker 1: You're listening to morning show? All right, Steve, come on,

120
00:06:56,880 --> 00:06:59,880
Speaker 1: let's recap today's Strawberry letter. The subject why must he

121
00:07:00,040 --> 00:07:03,680
Speaker 1: continue to text other women? He texting other women because

122
00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:08,040
Speaker 1: he liked it, because he's been texting them. He say,

123
00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:10,240
Speaker 1: ain't nothing wrong with texting them long as he ain't

124
00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:13,960
Speaker 1: crossing the line. You know, but you've busted him several

125
00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:17,160
Speaker 1: times he'll block a lady's number. But he's so cluses

126
00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:19,920
Speaker 1: clueless because I can go to his block messages and

127
00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:24,680
Speaker 1: still read them too. I love her. I didn't know

128
00:07:24,760 --> 00:07:29,040
Speaker 1: that he had delete his text messages from the whole

129
00:07:29,120 --> 00:07:31,800
Speaker 1: day before he come home. And when I check his phone,

130
00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:36,200
Speaker 1: the Texas and call logs is blank. Then if he

131
00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:39,880
Speaker 1: changes his pass code on his phone, it's an immediate argument.

132
00:07:40,440 --> 00:07:45,200
Speaker 1: This is a lot of stuff he doing, blocking, erasing,

133
00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:51,640
Speaker 1: changing pass codes for nothing. If nothing is wrong with

134
00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:54,880
Speaker 1: texting and talking as long as you ain't crossing the line.

135
00:07:55,480 --> 00:07:58,000
Speaker 1: But if you crossing the line, you got to change

136
00:07:58,000 --> 00:08:01,239
Speaker 1: your pass code and you got the ratio Texas. Then

137
00:08:01,280 --> 00:08:05,880
Speaker 1: he got real bold. One time you caught him texting

138
00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:09,560
Speaker 1: a lady, you call her, told her he was mad.

139
00:08:10,360 --> 00:08:12,520
Speaker 1: She ain't had no idea he was mad and said

140
00:08:12,720 --> 00:08:15,440
Speaker 1: he never got inappropriate with her because she married too.

141
00:08:16,560 --> 00:08:19,360
Speaker 1: Then she apologized to and told I told her no need,

142
00:08:19,840 --> 00:08:22,040
Speaker 1: I just wanted her to know how your husband operate.

143
00:08:22,720 --> 00:08:25,200
Speaker 1: Then you told her that he'll probably be reaching out

144
00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:34,520
Speaker 1: to her again soon, Damn you you know this. Then

145
00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:37,280
Speaker 1: she screamed shot all the texts he sent to her,

146
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:41,360
Speaker 1: and they were innocent. But I'm no fool. Ain't that

147
00:08:41,559 --> 00:08:44,800
Speaker 1: the way? It starts with an innocent text? She married?

148
00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:47,800
Speaker 1: He mad, both of them texting each other why because

149
00:08:47,840 --> 00:08:52,679
Speaker 1: they both like it. Then they get acquainted on the phone,

150
00:08:52,960 --> 00:08:57,160
Speaker 1: they meet somewhere and bam they have a sex. That's

151
00:08:57,200 --> 00:09:01,720
Speaker 1: pretty accurate sex. Yeah, that's what she said. It's disrespectful

152
00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:05,280
Speaker 1: and he don't see it that way. Then you said,

153
00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:07,400
Speaker 1: now you've said all this, and then you asked me

154
00:09:07,440 --> 00:09:10,720
Speaker 1: and Shirley, isn't texting and talking or form of cheating?

155
00:09:11,440 --> 00:09:15,120
Speaker 1: Or could I be overthinking this? Texting and talking ain't cheating.

156
00:09:15,440 --> 00:09:18,640
Speaker 1: I don't think it's just texting and talking. What becomes

157
00:09:18,640 --> 00:09:23,280
Speaker 1: to cheating? It's what you're texting and talking about. Yeah, yeah,

158
00:09:23,280 --> 00:09:30,319
Speaker 1: it could be what you got on that cheating. Yeah,

159
00:09:30,360 --> 00:09:38,920
Speaker 1: it's emotional cheating. He let me see it, screenshot, shoot

160
00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:45,200
Speaker 1: it to me. That's it. God, talk girl, hold on,

161
00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:49,800
Speaker 1: let me send you mine. That's it. Then the lady says,

162
00:09:49,920 --> 00:09:55,000
Speaker 1: or could I be overthinking this? You overthinking it? You overreacting.

163
00:09:55,559 --> 00:10:01,959
Speaker 1: He's overdoing it. You over you over everything. You gotta

164
00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:06,640
Speaker 1: check his phone. He gotta block the messages, block the text,

165
00:10:07,240 --> 00:10:10,360
Speaker 1: clean out his call law, clean out his message law

166
00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:14,840
Speaker 1: change his pass code? You find it out, You found

167
00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:18,439
Speaker 1: out a way to check the block text messages. Could

168
00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:21,640
Speaker 1: I be overthinking this? All you doing is thinking? You've

169
00:10:21,640 --> 00:10:25,040
Speaker 1: been told a married woman he gonna he gonna call

170
00:10:25,120 --> 00:10:30,800
Speaker 1: you again? She sent you all the texts they had.

171
00:10:31,480 --> 00:10:35,920
Speaker 1: But Steve, let me ask you this, Why isn't it

172
00:10:36,600 --> 00:10:39,840
Speaker 1: Why isn't he trying to stop doing this since he

173
00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:42,200
Speaker 1: knows it upsets her so much and knows that she

174
00:10:42,280 --> 00:10:47,400
Speaker 1: doesn't trust him. Why he isn't he He don't care?

175
00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:51,560
Speaker 1: Don't you care more about what he doing than her feeling? Exactly?

176
00:10:51,720 --> 00:10:56,400
Speaker 1: That's why? That's simple as that. Yeah, I'm I'm not

177
00:10:56,440 --> 00:10:58,800
Speaker 1: gonna stop doing this because I like it more than

178
00:10:58,840 --> 00:11:02,400
Speaker 1: I love being your husband? Right, and the threat of

179
00:11:02,440 --> 00:11:06,120
Speaker 1: you see, first of all, you've not threatened leaving him.

180
00:11:06,280 --> 00:11:09,240
Speaker 1: All you just said is could I be overthinking this?

181
00:11:10,160 --> 00:11:13,559
Speaker 1: You ain't threatened to leave. You ain't said this is unacceptable.

182
00:11:13,880 --> 00:11:16,120
Speaker 1: I'm not going to accept this. I'm not taking this.

183
00:11:16,200 --> 00:11:18,360
Speaker 1: You ain't said none of this. All you asked me

184
00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:21,640
Speaker 1: and Shirley was could I be overthinking it? If that's

185
00:11:21,679 --> 00:11:24,360
Speaker 1: where you act with it, why do you have to stop?

186
00:11:24,720 --> 00:11:29,880
Speaker 1: Ain't no ultimatum. Ain't no consequences. Oh you just go

187
00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:34,200
Speaker 1: overthink I got you thinking? Now that you overthinking it? Checkmate?

188
00:11:34,280 --> 00:11:40,520
Speaker 1: I win man. Most men are not married to you, lady.

189
00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:43,320
Speaker 1: I can tell you that about this marriage is in trouble.

190
00:11:44,360 --> 00:11:47,600
Speaker 1: Who is this on here? Wait a minute? What are

191
00:11:47,640 --> 00:11:56,200
Speaker 1: your phone messages? Come on? Who you hold on? Trust?

192
00:11:56,960 --> 00:11:59,240
Speaker 1: Hold on? Hold on, Wait a minute, ma'am you say

193
00:11:59,320 --> 00:12:02,960
Speaker 1: this is my husband? Yes, waiting to hold on? Hold

194
00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:06,680
Speaker 1: on one second, just hold on, hold on one second. Herman?

195
00:12:08,040 --> 00:12:15,960
Speaker 1: Why herman? Come in? Hell? Hell, it's her? You know

196
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:23,880
Speaker 1: who her? Who? You've been texting herman? It's Barbara. All

197
00:12:23,920 --> 00:12:27,120
Speaker 1: these is old ass people, yes, because they got old

198
00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:31,800
Speaker 1: ass names. Ain't nobody named named baby Barbara in a

199
00:12:31,880 --> 00:12:36,880
Speaker 1: long time. It's been a minute. When I come back,

200
00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:39,360
Speaker 1: I'm gonna give you a list of names to let

201
00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:42,040
Speaker 1: you know you was born in the sixties. We'll be

202
00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:46,080
Speaker 1: right there all right. Post your comments on Today's Strawberry

203
00:12:46,120 --> 00:12:49,160
Speaker 1: Letter at Steve Harvey FM on Instagram and Facebook. Please

204
00:12:49,240 --> 00:12:51,960
Speaker 1: check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand coming up.

205
00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:55,240
Speaker 1: Steve's gonna give us a list of names, like he said. Also,

206
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:58,280
Speaker 1: Junior Sports Talk coming up at forty six minutes after

207
00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:02,200
Speaker 1: the hour, Houston rocket sturgeons hardened. Right after this, you're

208
00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:04,720
Speaker 1: listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show