Speaker 1: Hello, Hello, is this the get Go?
Speaker 2: Yes, Hello, you texted me. You said you said you
Speaker 2: Oh godd ah, you said something. You said. Uh, my
Speaker 2: name is twenty two, and I want to talk about
Speaker 2: how I quit vaping to peg my boyfriends. How does
Speaker 2: that work? Why did you need to quit vaping to
Speaker 2: peg your boyfriends?
Speaker 1: Okay, so I wanted to quit vaping, but it is
Speaker 1: one of the hardest addictions to to like get tasked.
Speaker 1: It's from like the top five according to doctors and stuff.
Speaker 1: But he knew that I really really wanted to quit vaping,
Speaker 1: and he knew that I really wanted to peg him.
Speaker 1: And he was like, you know, if you quit vaping
Speaker 1: and I'm a single, been a nicotine for three months,
Speaker 1: you get pegging privileges. You have rights to my untouched asshole.
Speaker 1: No one's pecked him before and literally nothing's been up there,
Speaker 1: So how could I say no?
Speaker 2: Well, so this is uh, your boyfriend has incentivized you,
Speaker 2: offering up his his little asshole for you to.
Speaker 1: So I'm not gonna die. Yeah I am. Well, I'm
Speaker 1: thrilled to share this story because to all the people
Speaker 1: out there wanting to quit the substance, wanting to quit something.
Speaker 1: Just find yourself a submissive ass boyfriend who will let
Speaker 1: you peg him if you quit it.
Speaker 2: But just think about how great it would be to
Speaker 2: like take your hands and like open up his asshole
Speaker 2: and blow vape spoke into it.
Speaker 1: Wait, that's such a good point, guy, that's crazy.
Speaker 2: How has it?
Speaker 3: So?
Speaker 2: Has this been working so far? Have you quit vaping?
Speaker 1: It is? Yes, it has because I had after so
Speaker 1: this rule was three months. If I quit for three months,
Speaker 1: then I have privileges. But then we just I actually
Speaker 1: I quit in I had my last vapin in August
Speaker 1: of last year, so I've definitely had August of twenty
Speaker 1: twenty three, so I've had lots of time to do
Speaker 1: the deed, and I've done a team bit of the deed.
Speaker 1: But it actually, after ninety days of now nicotine, it
Speaker 1: gets like you don't It's still like you want it
Speaker 1: and concept, but the withdrawals are put behind you.
Speaker 2: And so has it been It hasn't been three months yet,
Speaker 2: has it? It has?
Speaker 1: Yeah? And yeah? Yeah, so how was I've reaped the
Speaker 1: benefits of my reward.
Speaker 4: It.
Speaker 1: So what they don't tell you about anal is that
Speaker 1: you really gotta like build up to that point, and
Speaker 1: so I've not used the strap on him yet, but
Speaker 1: it is, it is so positively delightful. I cannot describe
Speaker 1: to you.
Speaker 2: So what do you what do you? Is it fingers fists?
Speaker 2: What's going on?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, because I don't. It also was like I don't
Speaker 1: have a good time sometimes, you know. It's it's about
Speaker 1: finding that like from intakeer dominating time, and I didn't
Speaker 1: want to rush him into losing his anal virginity, you know,
Speaker 1: like I wanted to find a nice calm time. And
Speaker 1: there's only been a few times for that, even though
Speaker 1: it's been been so long since I've had access to
Speaker 1: its re access to his assle. One time I did
Speaker 1: clean his apartment and he told me, anytime you want, anytime,
Speaker 1: I will drop my drawers and you can just put
Speaker 1: put something in there. And I was like, you know what,
Speaker 1: you know what? He gave me one free coupon.
Speaker 2: It sounds like this guy, uh, I mean, uh, it
Speaker 2: sounds like he always wanted you to peg him, but
Speaker 2: he needed some little extra thing to kind of get there.
Speaker 1: This is probably true, but it's funnier whenever it's as
Speaker 1: a reward.
Speaker 5: Because we had.
Speaker 1: Been dating for like a all not a year, but
Speaker 1: almost a year whenever he threw it out there, because
Speaker 1: I'd always said I wanted to, but he was always scared.
Speaker 1: And it was more that after I like quit my
Speaker 1: like second hardest addiction. Weed was a tough one to quit.
Speaker 1: But I really worked through that one. But it's he
Speaker 1: always wanted it, but it's so scary, you know.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm.
Speaker 1: And he's actually in the room with me right now
Speaker 1: if you ever want to get his perspective.
Speaker 2: But oh yeah, sure, sure, sure, let's talk to him.
Speaker 2: Let's talk to him.
Speaker 1: Okay, here he is.
Speaker 2: Ullo, Hey, what's up?
Speaker 4: Man?
Speaker 3: A right?
Speaker 2: So are you do you do you vape? Do you
Speaker 2: do anything? What's your vice? What are you gonna do?
Speaker 5: No? I personally don't vape.
Speaker 4: I smoke weed like twice a month. I don't really
Speaker 4: do much.
Speaker 5: I just play video games.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm uh, So are you are you? You're not
Speaker 2: addicted to anything? There's not like a Hey, I'll quit
Speaker 2: playing video games and I can comb my fingers through
Speaker 2: your hair type of ship.
Speaker 5: No, I'm not really addicted to anything. I I don't know.
Speaker 5: I don't do much.
Speaker 2: How's how's being pegged? Ben?
Speaker 4: Gone well, working up to it so far, just fingers,
Speaker 4: nothing crazy, that's cool.
Speaker 2: Are you excited about it? Is this? Is this a positive,
Speaker 2: wonderful development in your life?
Speaker 5: Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 4: But honestly, the hardest part is just find the hardest
Speaker 4: time to do it, because like both she and I
Speaker 4: both live with people all the time, So like just
Speaker 4: finding like a.
Speaker 5: Time where no one's no one's home to like.
Speaker 4: You know, either catch us or like overhear anything.
Speaker 5: That's probably the hardest part of all of it.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, I mean, what how many roommates do you have?
Speaker 5: So normally I have two other people I live with.
Speaker 4: When I'm in college, but right now I live with
Speaker 4: my parents for the summer, so yeah, two or three
Speaker 4: other people.
Speaker 2: Usually you live with your parents, but so you live
Speaker 2: with your parents during the summer. Yeah, See, it must
Speaker 2: be nice when you leave because then they can peg
Speaker 2: each other because that's what they're waiting.
Speaker 1: Possibly.
Speaker 4: Possibly they're very they're very conservative, so I'm not sure
Speaker 4: about that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, listen, here's the thing, the conservative stuff
Speaker 2: on the on the surface, but in the sheets we're
Speaker 2: getting a little liberal. Oh god, well, you can hand
Speaker 2: the phone back to who your girlfriend all right here
Speaker 2: you go. Hello, Well this was nice. This really made
Speaker 2: me believe in love again.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I think we are a perfect perfect match.
Speaker 2: Is there anything else you want to say to the
Speaker 2: people of the computer before we go?
Speaker 1: There's one thing actually, something that bothers me is people
Speaker 1: often abuse the term gaslight. They think it means manipulate,
Speaker 1: but it's actually based.
Speaker 2: Off of it actually means when you fart in someone's.
Speaker 1: Face and you light it on fire.
Speaker 2: And you light it on fire.
Speaker 1: I don't know just the actual word comes from. When
Speaker 1: this guy turns down this oil lamp, it's like gas
Speaker 1: lamp slowly and slowly, and it's like and his girlfriend.
Speaker 1: He convinces his girlfriend she's going blind. And so it's
Speaker 1: actually about convincing the victims that they're actually insane, not
Speaker 1: just oh he's a manipulator. He's like a manipulator who
Speaker 1: makes you think you're insane. I don't know, I just
Speaker 1: always wanted to share that on the show.
Speaker 2: I didn't know that there was a parable about a
Speaker 2: lamp that's like ancient folklore. Shit. I thought it was just.
Speaker 1: Like a word if you google it, it's actually just
Speaker 1: based off of some popular play. I'm not sure. It's
Speaker 1: like a some kind of non musical but a play.
Speaker 1: I don't remember the name, but to the people out
Speaker 1: here listening, definitely research it because so many people misuse
Speaker 1: it and the nerd in me is like, oh, if
Speaker 1: only they knew. It's only they knew.
Speaker 2: Well, that's interesting because I feel like I've only started
Speaker 2: hearing that word in the past, like a couple of years,
Speaker 2: and I guess you're I guess a gas lamp. That's
Speaker 2: I mean, they were using that in the seventeen hundreds
Speaker 2: or whatever the fuck, So it took a while for
Speaker 2: it to catch on.
Speaker 1: Definitely, yeah, but it was so lovely to share the story.
Speaker 1: I hope all the partners out there can use this
Speaker 1: as an interesting reward.
Speaker 2: Of course, take care and enjoy your smoke free and
Speaker 2: butthole filled life.
Speaker 1: I'm shall thank you so much.
Speaker 2: Take in the background, he said, wait, let me say
Speaker 2: bye too, But it's okay. He we we said goodbye
Speaker 2: and spirit who from?
Speaker 6: My name is Kapu?
Speaker 2: Hello?
Speaker 6: Hello? Is this the gig?
Speaker 2: Yes? What'd you say? Your name was?
Speaker 6: My name is Kabukabu?
Speaker 5: Yes?
Speaker 2: What's up? Kabu? Hello?
Speaker 6: Gick uh?
Speaker 2: How how how how can I get you today. What
Speaker 2: do you want to talk about?
Speaker 6: Uh? I have a boyfriend in a different country, and
Speaker 6: I'm not sure what I should do about the whole
Speaker 6: being in the same countrys dake, if this is a
Speaker 6: good idea or not.
Speaker 2: Where are you?
Speaker 6: I'm in America and he's in Japan.
Speaker 2: He's in Japan? Okay? Is he is he Japanese? Or
Speaker 2: is he just living there?
Speaker 5: Yeah? He's just he is.
Speaker 6: We have met in person already, but we met over
Speaker 6: the internet, and I'm getting maybe a little anxious about
Speaker 6: the whole moving to another country thing, or if I
Speaker 6: should have him move here.
Speaker 2: How old are you?
Speaker 6: I'm thirty cold he is twenty nine.
Speaker 2: Twenty nine. What do you do for work?
Speaker 6: I make pizzas.
Speaker 2: I got all right, so you can't really do that remotely.
Speaker 6: Yeah, And I kind of dropped out of college, so
Speaker 6: I don't really have a degree. And I know people
Speaker 6: from America and other countries that have moved over there
Speaker 6: and have a lot to say about work and good
Speaker 6: and bad things, and I'm not sure if I should
Speaker 6: do that, Like I really go ahead?
Speaker 2: Well, okay, how long have you been talking to this
Speaker 2: guy for?
Speaker 6: Okay, so we've been dating for about a year, and
Speaker 6: I met him in March when I went to Japan
Speaker 6: for a week.
Speaker 2: Okay, so you met him once, you really met him
Speaker 2: in person that one time we spent.
Speaker 6: A week together, but we talk like every.
Speaker 5: Day over the year.
Speaker 2: Right right, Where in America do you live?
Speaker 6: I live in Maryland.
Speaker 2: Live in Maryland. Oh nice, that's where I'm from. What's
Speaker 2: your life like in Maryland?
Speaker 6: I don't really like Like I'm from Baltimore. I don't
Speaker 6: really like Baltimore. I don't really like living here. I've
Speaker 6: lived here all my life. But when I went over there,
Speaker 6: everything like, like all the buses are on time, everything
Speaker 6: was cheaper. A lot of my online friends are Japanese,
Speaker 6: so I got to meet them. Like, there's a whole
Speaker 6: bunch of people. I don't have friends, a lot of
Speaker 6: friends over here.
Speaker 2: Okay, let me ask you a question. Yeah, let's say
Speaker 2: you pack up all your stuff, you get an apartment
Speaker 2: in Japan. You do all the papers, get the visa,
Speaker 2: get a job, say goodbye to your friends, sell your furniture.
Speaker 2: Do you think go all the way to Japan? You
Speaker 2: move in. You get a text from your boyfriend that says, hey,
Speaker 2: I actually think that we shouldn't see each other anymore
Speaker 2: after of course mourning the relationship. Would you still be
Speaker 2: happy that you moved to Japan.
Speaker 6: I would be happy that I moved to Japan because
Speaker 6: I've been studying this language for four years, like over
Speaker 6: the internet, and I have a lot of friends over
Speaker 6: there that I got to meet when I was visiting.
Speaker 6: And I also kind of sometimes DJ, so I got
Speaker 6: the DJ over there. I think there will still be
Speaker 6: many opportunities for me to do cool stuff if I'm
Speaker 6: over there. Even if it doesn't work.
Speaker 2: Out, that's great, That's fantastic. Yeah, because I think if
Speaker 2: it was, like if you were moving there like one
Speaker 2: hundred or ninety or even eighty percent just because of
Speaker 2: this guy, it's kind of a recipe for disaster. But
Speaker 2: if you have a well rounded kind of if you
Speaker 2: have a well rounded bunch of reasons that would take
Speaker 2: you over there, I think that that's pretty good.
Speaker 6: Okay. I mean it's not my first time meeting people
Speaker 6: off the internet that I talked to at least more
Speaker 6: than a year or something to hang out with, so
Speaker 6: I'm well versed in kind of meeting people and then
Speaker 6: and then not really hanging out again. Sometimes after it.
Speaker 6: But there are people I also still talk to that
Speaker 6: I've known for eight years over the internet.
Speaker 2: Why what was I gonna say, Oh, how hard is
Speaker 2: it to get the visa to stay there for an
Speaker 2: extended period of time?
Speaker 6: Well, it's not hard, because if you're an American, you
Speaker 6: don't really even need to apply for a visa to
Speaker 6: get there, like for ninety days. I think it depends
Speaker 6: on what you end up doing.
Speaker 2: Over there, because you yeah, well, I mean, I mean,
Speaker 2: how about this man? Like instead of I mean you
Speaker 2: you went and you hung out there for a week
Speaker 2: before before a fucking moving there and like getting to
Speaker 2: doing a whole thing. Why don't you just go there
Speaker 2: for for ninety days and see how you like it.
Speaker 6: But I would have to find a job that will
Speaker 6: sustain me, And that's probably the most difficult difficult thing
Speaker 6: of this is that I don't really I don't really
Speaker 6: have a college degree, so I can't really do any
Speaker 6: English teaching jobs, you know, even if I can speak Japanese, like,
Speaker 6: you need your degree to be able to begin to
Speaker 6: talk to those people. So then I'm out of that.
Speaker 6: Then that limits the rest of what I'm able to
Speaker 6: do too.
Speaker 2: Do you have any college credit.
Speaker 6: I do not, and I dropped out.
Speaker 2: How how how much have you researched this whole thing
Speaker 2: of getting a job remotely or getting a job in
Speaker 2: Japan or I mean, look, look, the best thing you
Speaker 2: could do would probably be to get some remote job
Speaker 2: in America and then take it to Japan, because I
Speaker 2: think the yen is very weak right now.
Speaker 6: The yen is still very weak.
Speaker 2: The end is very weak. So I mean, if you
Speaker 2: can get a job where you're making American dollars, you're
Speaker 2: hooked up.
Speaker 6: Yes, But then like even kind of having a job
Speaker 6: like that and reporting your taxes apparently is hard.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, super hard. Taxes are very annoying. I mean,
Speaker 2: if you looked into that, if you looked into uh,
Speaker 2: you know, remote jobs that pay.
Speaker 6: Am easiest thing that that negates all of that because
Speaker 6: the work visa requires you. So there's a work visa
Speaker 6: that you can have for that type of work, and
Speaker 6: then there's like a like a redund like more redundant
Speaker 6: work visa, but then you have to basically work in
Speaker 6: a sledgshop or wherever they put you. And I haven't
Speaker 6: heard good stories about that, Like people working taxis are
Speaker 6: working for like different agricultural places and they aren't.
Speaker 2: Do you do you have do you what? Do you
Speaker 2: have savings at all?
Speaker 6: I'm working on that.
Speaker 2: Okay, Maybe, I mean, maybe there's something where you kind
Speaker 2: of instead of moving to Japan immediately, you take a
Speaker 2: year or two to kind of build up some savings
Speaker 2: living in Maryland, and then when you've got some you know,
Speaker 2: ground to stand on, you look at what the opportunities
Speaker 2: are like in Japan, and in that year or two
Speaker 2: you can probably do some kind of online community college thing.
Speaker 6: I think maybe either get in community college in and
Speaker 6: actually finishing this time would work. But like even then,
Speaker 6: I think the easiest option there would be was to
Speaker 6: like visit a few times and then if I like
Speaker 6: someone enough, maybe marry them, because like the marriage visa
Speaker 6: is the easiest one to get.
Speaker 2: Uh well, well on the ninety day.
Speaker 6: One, you can't get a job to make money. So
Speaker 6: where am I going to stay?
Speaker 4: You know?
Speaker 2: I mean I guess you could, Yeah, you could, you could,
Speaker 2: you could marry him? Why not? I don't know. I
Speaker 2: don't know. I'm just spitball and I'm just trying to
Speaker 2: figure out how you can do this.
Speaker 6: I mean, I met him, I like him. It worked,
Speaker 6: but I got to meet him a few more times
Speaker 6: and come over there. You know.
Speaker 2: See, be careful though, and what's what's he do? What's
Speaker 2: his deal?
Speaker 6: So he works a factory job. He's a nice guy.
Speaker 2: So I assume he I assume because he works the
Speaker 2: factory job that he doesn't have a lot of time
Speaker 2: off to go visit you in Baltimore. Yes, okay, Uh.
Speaker 6: Japan's work like work kind of like what is it?
Speaker 3: Work?
Speaker 6: Culture is different from Americas in which even on your
Speaker 6: day off you're expected to which he was today, go
Speaker 6: and do overtime and then afterwards you're expected to drink
Speaker 6: your boss and far somewhere like that's just kind of
Speaker 6: and if you don't go, and then people look down
Speaker 6: on you, right.
Speaker 2: I mean I think I think the long term goal
Speaker 2: of moving to Japan, I mean, I think it's cool,
Speaker 2: especially if you're not doing it just to be with
Speaker 2: this guy, and you know, because your friends I have.
Speaker 6: I wouldn't think about moving in another country it was
Speaker 6: just for this guy, you know, Like I have more
Speaker 6: than fifty friends over there and people.
Speaker 2: That I know of from the music, And look, dude,
Speaker 2: I think it's I think it's a cool goal. I think.
Speaker 2: I think it's a cool goal. I think if like
Speaker 2: financially you can't hack it right now, you could probably
Speaker 2: make a plan to be able to hack it in
Speaker 2: a couple of years, you know, go to uh. I mean,
Speaker 2: I'm sure there's like two year programs or you know,
Speaker 2: even just spending two years working at the pizza place
Speaker 2: and saving up to to kind of get over there.
Speaker 2: I mean, I think it's a cool I think it's
Speaker 2: a cool it's a cool goal.
Speaker 6: Thank you, gik.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean don't what I mean? I yeah, all right,
Speaker 2: what how do you where'd you where? Online? Did you
Speaker 2: meet this guy?
Speaker 5: So?
Speaker 6: Like I played this game called have you heard of
Speaker 6: yo Chat?
Speaker 2: You met this guy on vr chat? Yeah?
Speaker 6: Like, uh so COVID happened. And I lost my job
Speaker 6: right four years ago, and like I was inside a
Speaker 6: lot and I was already kind of like playing games
Speaker 6: because I like, I like playing like momos and stuff.
Speaker 6: But I got really depressed. And then one of my
Speaker 6: friends was like, hey, let's try Yocha and see how
Speaker 6: it is. And and eventually that friend stopped playing. But
Speaker 6: like I met some Japanese girl like on the game
Speaker 6: four years ago, and she said something to me that
Speaker 6: like changed changed my life. I guess I couldn't speak
Speaker 6: any Japanese, but she used Google Translate to try to
Speaker 6: talk to me, like like through the games, like to
Speaker 6: try to talk at me because she was interested in
Speaker 6: American culture and she was interested in like knowing about
Speaker 6: like what my life is like and stuff. And then
Speaker 6: she said to me, as best as she could, I
Speaker 6: want to study English so that I can learn more
Speaker 6: about you and about who you are. And that was
Speaker 6: the first time someone said that to me ever, like
Speaker 6: that they want to know about me and they want
Speaker 6: to be my friend.
Speaker 2: You know, you felt very you know, like someone cared.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I felt I felt like I was seen, you know,
Speaker 6: because I struggled. I struggle with depression, like chronic depression,
Speaker 6: and there are moments where it gets really dark if
Speaker 6: I'm very stressed. So it kind of helped me out
Speaker 6: of like this kind of slump. That was because I
Speaker 6: was like, well, life can't be life can't be so
Speaker 6: boring and and and you know dark. If I can
Speaker 6: do this thing that other people can't do. You know,
Speaker 6: your typical person is not in America, isn't a Japanese speaker.
Speaker 6: It's something new, and so every almost every other day
Speaker 6: for like the next four years, I would like go
Speaker 6: on and play the games and like join I made friends,
Speaker 6: join my friends and listen to them talk in Japanese
Speaker 6: all drinking, because my folks ability to focus is so
Speaker 6: bad that like I can't, I can't pay attention to
Speaker 6: like text like books, Like I bought some books off
Speaker 6: of Amazon. I couldn't. I couldn't focus on studying the
Speaker 6: hero ghana and the Kapa Khana and stuff. So I
Speaker 6: just I would get on early in the morning on
Speaker 6: a day off and like get some alcohol and drink
Speaker 6: with Japanese people and get drunk with Japanese people overseas
Speaker 6: on the internet.
Speaker 2: How early are we talking?
Speaker 6: I'm talking like nine eight in the morning.
Speaker 2: You're getting drunk on VR chat at eight in the
Speaker 2: morning with Japanese people.
Speaker 6: Yes, And I did that for years. Yeah, and then
Speaker 6: I started knowing how to speak their language just by
Speaker 6: listening to them talk.
Speaker 2: That sounds pretty fun. How much Japanese do you know?
Speaker 2: Are you fluent?
Speaker 6: I knew enough to get myself around in Tokyo, but
Speaker 6: reading is really hard. Because I did I didn't like
Speaker 6: all of my studies speaking, so reading kanji and stuff
Speaker 6: is pretty hard, but I can read some here.
Speaker 2: Aghana, you said you have fifty friends like you you,
Speaker 2: so you're feeling like if you go over there, you
Speaker 2: just have you're gonna have a lot of You're gonna
Speaker 2: know a lot of people already.
Speaker 6: I went over there to visit, and there was it
Speaker 6: became an issue because there were so many things I
Speaker 6: had to do with people.
Speaker 2: That's wonderful. I wait, so how long ago did you
Speaker 2: start doing start doing this stuff on vr chat?
Speaker 6: Four years? And I started DJing like on and off
Speaker 6: vr chat at DJ and like at two different events
Speaker 6: off the line two three years ago. But my definite
Speaker 6: study is four years.
Speaker 2: That's cool. No, I love this idea. I think it's great.
Speaker 2: It sounds like you have a great life waiting for
Speaker 2: you in Japan. You just got to figure out how
Speaker 2: to get there potentially. Be patient about it.
Speaker 6: I'll try my best to be patient and work forward.
Speaker 6: Sometimes it gets like my brain is mean and I
Speaker 6: end up backtracking and just ruining things.
Speaker 2: But what what do you mean?
Speaker 6: Like, uh, you know, when you're have you ever like
Speaker 6: sabotaged yourself like subconsciously?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 6: Because you feel like you shouldn't be happy.
Speaker 2: Maybe yeah, oh yoh, yeah, oh yeah, I know exactly
Speaker 2: what you're talking about. I uh, I, actually I'll do
Speaker 2: a little share I've been. I I kind of I
Speaker 2: kind of go like in and out of going to therapy,
Speaker 2: and I got back in and I'm like, all right,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna really commit to like doing this every single week.
Speaker 2: And I went to therapy like a week ago, and
Speaker 2: I I kind of came out of it being like, Okay,
Speaker 2: for at least a week. I'm gonna challenge myself to
Speaker 2: like allow myself to be happy. Like my therapist said,
Speaker 2: I need to like take a risk, and so I
Speaker 2: was like, Okay, that's the risk I'm going to take
Speaker 2: is allowing myself to be happy. Because when you allow
Speaker 2: yourself to be happy, you you you kind of risk
Speaker 2: the idea that your happiness will be taken away from you,
Speaker 2: whether it's through some something external or just the how
Speaker 2: you know your own brain works. And so that's what
Speaker 2: I'm trying to do is kind of allow myself to
Speaker 2: be happy. And it's easy to kind of you like,
Speaker 2: you can sabotage yourself and not allow yourself to be happy.
Speaker 2: To kind of protect yourself from failure or rejection or
Speaker 2: something else bad. But that's just a shit way to live, you.
Speaker 6: Know, it's so hard like when you actually do that,
Speaker 6: because then like it leads to you being vulnerable, doesn't it?
Speaker 6: Like I feel like that, like I'm vulnerable if I
Speaker 6: don't at least put my guard up. And putting my
Speaker 6: guard up makes you feel kind of miserable. But like
Speaker 6: the being exposed like that kind of scary gig you's scary.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it is scary. It is scary. And the funny
Speaker 2: thing is it's like the ultimate fucking thing is like
Speaker 2: you know, your happiness will inevitably be taken away from
Speaker 2: you no matter what, because you will die. But that's
Speaker 2: fucking a stupid way to live. I think, just always
Speaker 2: thinking about you know this is going to end, so
Speaker 2: why let's never enjoy anything ever? You know, they have
Speaker 2: great seven elevens over there too, They have dude, Like I.
Speaker 6: Bought alcohol out of the seven to eleven when I
Speaker 6: was over there, and I was it was so cool
Speaker 6: to do. But it makes me wonder, like how do
Speaker 6: they how do you keep people from being alcoholics if
Speaker 6: you're just gonna have like alcohol.
Speaker 2: In the seven eleven h The answer is they don't.
Speaker 6: They don't, but like, yes, they don't, because there are
Speaker 6: people that are drunk on the streets, like I've seen it,
Speaker 6: like people just passed out kind of like from drinking
Speaker 6: too much alcohol.
Speaker 2: By the way, just before we go, I do need
Speaker 2: to ask you this, So when you're getting drunk at
Speaker 2: fucking eight o'clock in the morning, or do you not
Speaker 2: pass out afterwards? Like do you not sleep at one pm? No?
Speaker 6: Because I can drink from maybe.
Speaker 2: Like eight hours or something like the Jesus Christ.
Speaker 6: Oh my god, I'm a strong I'm a strong drinker.
Speaker 6: It's one thing that's gotten me a reputation with my
Speaker 6: my friends over there is that I can help drink
Speaker 6: them if I really tried.
Speaker 2: What's your name again? My name is Kabukaboo, Taboo or Caboo.
Speaker 6: It's it's caboo. It's like I'm using my my internet name.
Speaker 2: Okay. Is that a Japanese name?
Speaker 6: So it means turnips turn in English. It's like a vegetable.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna call you turnip because because I'm in America, they're.
Speaker 6: Both mean the same thing.
Speaker 2: They both mean the same thing exactly Turnip, thanks for calling.
Speaker 2: Uh good luck. This is a cool uh life. You know,
Speaker 2: I'm also born and raised in uh Baltimore and uh
Speaker 2: so Tokyo is definitely not Baltimore, So I think it
Speaker 2: is not a change of pace could be good and
Speaker 2: I wish you good luck on getting there. Is there
Speaker 2: anything else you want to say to the people of
Speaker 2: the computer before we go?
Speaker 6: Thank you all for the advice in the chat, and like,
Speaker 6: if you love someone and they're like in another country
Speaker 6: and it doesn't seem like entirely crazy, like you have
Speaker 6: other things you can go to the other countries for,
Speaker 6: actually consider it, like don't let your relatives and other
Speaker 6: people kind of be like that's that's horse shit, like
Speaker 6: actually kind of like speal it out maybe for like
Speaker 6: a few years, and then do something new. Take care,
Speaker 6: turn it okay, Bye gig.
Speaker 2: Attention listeners of the Therapy Gecko podcast. Do you know
Speaker 2: that I do a live version of this podcast on
Speaker 2: stage in person in front of real people, And that
Speaker 2: I'm doing this live show in several cities across the
Speaker 2: United States this year, and that tickets are available right
Speaker 2: now at therapy geckotour dot com or at the link
Speaker 2: in the episode description. It is all true. I'm currently
Speaker 2: on my third tour doing Therapy Gecko Live all around
Speaker 2: the country and it is the most fun, sick, amazing
Speaker 2: thing ever and you should come out and be a
Speaker 2: part of it. The shows involve a mix of material
Speaker 2: and presentations from myself combined with a group Gecko therapy
Speaker 2: session where members of the audience come on stage to
Speaker 2: share things from their lives in front of a big
Speaker 2: group of people, just like we do here on the podcast.
Speaker 2: Whether you're a fan of the podcast or you have
Speaker 2: no idea what this is and you clicked on it
Speaker 2: by accident, you're gonna have a great time at the
Speaker 2: live show once again. Tickets are available right now at
Speaker 2: Therapy geckotour dot com or at the link in the
Speaker 2: episode description. These are really fun shows. They're always wild,
Speaker 2: They're always unpredictable, and I hope to see you guys there. Hello,
Speaker 2: Hi there. What's your name?
Speaker 5: I'm Gabe, Gabe.
Speaker 2: What's going on?
Speaker 5: Who is this?
Speaker 2: This is the Barack Obama?
Speaker 5: Your voice sounds a lot different than it does on
Speaker 5: the stream.
Speaker 2: Well, your voice sounds like a guy's voice. What's up, Gabe?
Speaker 5: Nothing much, I'm just chilling.
Speaker 2: How about you what you want to talk about today?
Speaker 5: I guess I guess you saw my text. I'm quite
Speaker 5: bad at talking to people. I was wondering if you
Speaker 5: had any advice as someone who talks to I assume.
Speaker 2: Any people, Like Sure, yeah, sure, I mean you're bad
Speaker 2: at talking. I mean, let me see what you texted here.
Speaker 2: You said, I have absolutely zero ability to start continue conversations. Now,
Speaker 2: is this with like, uh, like when you're like dating,
Speaker 2: or just when you're like making small talk, or like
Speaker 2: with friends or just like kind of like this is
Speaker 2: a general thing.
Speaker 5: It's I guess it's like a general kind of thing.
Speaker 5: I'm not too concerned, like like talking to people at work,
Speaker 5: you know, but like specifically with trying to like develop
Speaker 5: friendships relationships, and I don't know, you know, it's it's
Speaker 5: hard talking to people making friends, like specifically, do.
Speaker 2: You have very hard? Do you have any friends already?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 5: I have a I have a few really good friends
Speaker 5: that I am getting good at talking to, you know,
Speaker 5: but like trying to branch out is like the hard thing.
Speaker 2: Sure, I mean, I think like making friends is one thing,
Speaker 2: but like starting how to just how to start and
Speaker 2: continue a conversation. I've always felt like the answer to
Speaker 2: that question was just comes out of like a natural curiosity,
Speaker 2: you know. I mean, if you like are curious about
Speaker 2: people and like give a shit, then you just kind
Speaker 2: of follow where that curiosity takes you and you ask questions, right, yeah,
Speaker 2: like yeah.
Speaker 5: So I was like thinking a while ago, like I
Speaker 5: feel like my my thing that like I have trouble
Speaker 5: with is that like like continuing conversations. I know, like
Speaker 5: like making small talk and everything. I don't know why,
Speaker 5: but like my brain chemistry just doesn't like think of
Speaker 5: those things to ask about like, oh, how is work going?
Speaker 5: How is this thing in your life going? Like I don't,
Speaker 5: I don't know. I feel like my brain specifically, I
Speaker 5: like to talk about things like like games I'm playing
Speaker 5: or shows I'm watching, and I just have a hard
Speaker 5: time thinking about things that they're doing or things you know,
Speaker 5: if that makes sense.
Speaker 2: That, No, that does make sense. I think there's something
Speaker 2: to be said about like trying to enter other people's contexts,
Speaker 2: you know, kind of what they might be thinking or
Speaker 2: what might be important or interesting to them and kind
Speaker 2: of tapping into that. And I understand that it seems
Speaker 2: like you have kind of your topics of conversation that
Speaker 2: you're you're comfortable in, like the video games you're playing
Speaker 2: and your own life. Uh, and maybe it makes you
Speaker 2: uncomfortable to veer out of those topics. But I would say,
Speaker 2: next time you're in a conversation to maybe challenge yourself
Speaker 2: to get out of that comfort zone a little bit
Speaker 2: and take the risk of, like, you know, instead of
Speaker 2: talking about Starduo Valley, ask ask the person that you're
Speaker 2: talking to questions about their out of life. This stuff.
Speaker 2: This stuff feels very simple, it really does. Like all
Speaker 2: you have to do is just show interest in the
Speaker 2: other person. And funnily enough, at least for me, that's
Speaker 2: way easier than like coming up with shit to say
Speaker 2: and talking about yourself. Right to literally just sit there
Speaker 2: and listen and not say anything. I mean, it's the
Speaker 2: easiest thing, you know. I mean, you could just keep
Speaker 2: asking people because people love to talk about themselves and like, like,
Speaker 2: similarly to how you feel comfortable talking about the video
Speaker 2: games that you play in your life and what's going
Speaker 2: on with you, other people also feel very comfortable talking
Speaker 2: about those things too, so you kind of just go
Speaker 2: them into talking within their comfort zone by asking them
Speaker 2: questions about shit and then you know you you go
Speaker 2: from there. Can that make any sense?
Speaker 5: Yeah? I think I'm I think I'm wrapping my head
Speaker 5: around it. It's I don't know. My brain chemistry just
Speaker 5: has a hard time, like its figuring people out. Like, yeah,
Speaker 5: it's something I definitely need to work on, and I
Speaker 5: think I will definitely like listen to the VOD and
Speaker 5: like just try to absorb everything you're saying.
Speaker 2: You know, I mean, are you how old are you?
Speaker 5: I'm twenty two, twenty two?
Speaker 2: What do you do? Are you in school? Do you work?
Speaker 5: I'm not in school anymore. I'm probably not gonna go back. Uh.
Speaker 5: I'm working right now. Uh. I'm a merchandiser. So I
Speaker 5: go into a bunch of stores and stock their product,
Speaker 5: and it's it's not a bad gig for me. I
Speaker 5: work by myself all day pretty much most of the time,
Speaker 5: so I don't have to worry about these things at
Speaker 5: work most of the time.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm mm hmm. Are do you like are you
Speaker 2: curious about other people? It's kind of okay if you're
Speaker 2: not too.
Speaker 5: I I want to say that I am. There's there's
Speaker 5: definitely people that like, like I'll be I'll be at
Speaker 5: like my friends like parties and stuff, and I'll see
Speaker 5: people there that I kind of want to talk to,
Speaker 5: but it's hard to break that barrier without like without
Speaker 5: my friend that is too, Like there's sometimes people at
Speaker 5: work too that I want to talk to. Yeah, and
Speaker 5: it's just when I when I break away by myself,
Speaker 5: it's a lot harder to to do that on my own.
Speaker 2: I think there's a little trick here, which is that
Speaker 2: like you're kind of you are you afraid of like rejection?
Speaker 2: Are you afraid that you'll try to start talking to
Speaker 2: someone and they just won't want to talk to you.
Speaker 5: I think I've always had a very, uh a big
Speaker 5: fear of rejection, so that that could be a root
Speaker 5: of it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think the and this is it's difficult, and
Speaker 2: I'm still trying to uh kind of get here because
Speaker 2: it's like being secure with yourself is a forever game
Speaker 2: and it's hard. But to me, this secure way to
Speaker 2: go about this is to make it a very internal
Speaker 2: game where you're like, look, I'm going into this social
Speaker 2: interaction in good faith with the intention of trying to
Speaker 2: get to know people, of socializing, and you know, I
Speaker 2: want to talk to this person because I find them interesting.
Speaker 2: I'm going into this in good faith, and if my
Speaker 2: good faith is rebuffed, that is in no way, shape
Speaker 2: or form a reflection upon me because I'm going into
Speaker 2: it with good faith. It might be a reflection upon them,
Speaker 2: but that doesn't matter. That's their story, that's not yours.
Speaker 2: And so it's a single player game, and you win
Speaker 2: if you overcome your fear and do the thing and
Speaker 2: understand that, uh you're gumma, you're coming in on good faith.
Speaker 2: And you don't win if the other person thinks you're
Speaker 2: cool and awesome, because that's out of your control. That's
Speaker 2: not anything. So the the game is, the game is
Speaker 2: one when you overcome your own fear and and approach
Speaker 2: these situations, uh, in a in a secure, confident way,
Speaker 2: which is so hard to do, you know. Uh, you know,
Speaker 2: I'm talking about it like it's easy. But that's what
Speaker 2: I think the parameters of the game of kind of
Speaker 2: interacting with society and people is is is it's an
Speaker 2: internal game, weirdly enough, even it's a it's it's kind
Speaker 2: of like an internal single player game. Weirdly enough, even
Speaker 2: though you're interacting with other people because you know, it's
Speaker 2: about you, and it's about if you're doing your best
Speaker 2: effort to overcome your fears, not if other people like
Speaker 2: you or accept you, because that's just out of your
Speaker 2: fucking hands. Does that make sense?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 5: I think so.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, talking to people is crazy because some people
Speaker 2: are just uh, I don't know, so people are. There's
Speaker 2: another thing I think about, which is the I don't
Speaker 2: know where I heard it, but I heard something about
Speaker 2: like the sixty forty rule, which is like, I don't
Speaker 2: know which is sixty and which is forty, and the
Speaker 2: numbers are iffy, but basically, like, some percentage of how
Speaker 2: people respond to you is based on them and how
Speaker 2: they're feeling in the moments and who they are, and
Speaker 2: then of course an undeniable significant percentage is based on
Speaker 2: you and how you're approaching the interaction. And that percentage
Speaker 2: is the percentage that we tend to obsess over, but
Speaker 2: we kind of never think about the other forty percent,
Speaker 2: which is, okay, they might be feeling a certain way
Speaker 2: that's influencing how they're going about this interaction. I mean,
Speaker 2: other people's responses to you is crafted from years and
Speaker 2: years and years of their life experiences and brain chemistry
Speaker 2: and ancestry and all this shit that is just out
Speaker 2: of your zone of anything, and you can pretty easily
Speaker 2: discount all that and go, no, they don't like me
Speaker 2: because I talked to I said something stupid.
Speaker 5: You know. Yeah, I think that's a problem I have too.
Speaker 5: I'm just like like I'll talk to people and they
Speaker 5: I guess, like, for a specific example, I guess like
Speaker 5: if we go into the dating realm. I went on
Speaker 5: a date once and I thought things were going good.
Speaker 5: I thought we had a good conversation, hitting off pretty
Speaker 5: well texting like prior to the date. But after the date,
Speaker 5: she just kind of ghosted me yea, and I was
Speaker 5: super confused. And it's just it was just all I
Speaker 5: could think about, like for so long, just like what
Speaker 5: what did I say? What did I What did I
Speaker 5: do wrong? And yeah, it really it really messes with me.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, dude. That No. I mean, the dating
Speaker 2: realm is uh, it's insane. No, I mean it's devastating
Speaker 2: man to you. You you go out with someone and
Speaker 2: you feel like you have a connection and you know
Speaker 2: this and that and the other thing, and then it
Speaker 2: just doesn't work out. It's hard it's really hard, but
Speaker 2: you you you really really really have to learn to
Speaker 2: not let it affect your sense of who you are
Speaker 2: because it'll just fuck you up.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's it's it's devastating. You wish it worked out,
Speaker 2: but you can't let the fact that it didn't work
Speaker 2: out make you think that you're you know, a piece
Speaker 2: of ship, because again, all the all that, all that
Speaker 2: really matters that at the end of the day, I
Speaker 2: think is that you like try to your best two
Speaker 2: go about the universe in some amount of good faith,
Speaker 2: even if you fuck up here and there, you know,
Speaker 2: it's all that really matters.
Speaker 5: Yeah, just I guess doing my best to not fuck.
Speaker 2: Up is yeah, gold. Yeah, and like whatever, I mean,
Speaker 2: it could just be that like, uh, you know, there
Speaker 2: was no there was no attraction, and how do you
Speaker 2: fix that? I don't know, Uh, I I mean for
Speaker 2: every for every you know, ten, twenty, thirty, forty, whatever,
Speaker 2: people who don't find you attractive, there's at least one
Speaker 2: who does. And it's a little bit of like a game.
Speaker 2: It's a little bit of like just a numbers game
Speaker 2: of putting yourself out there over and over and over
Speaker 2: and over again, which again is is kind of kind
Speaker 2: of can be brutal, kind of can be brutal, but
Speaker 2: you just you got to do it and you got
Speaker 2: to learn to do it in a in a secure way,
Speaker 2: which is hard.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's if we're talking about like, yeah, if we're
Speaker 5: talking about like dating, I've kind of like I'm kind
Speaker 5: of ignoring that side right now, just because I get
Speaker 5: into habits where I like get too into like like
Speaker 5: this headspace where I'm like I need to get this
Speaker 5: app and I need to be on the dating apps
Speaker 5: every day.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, that's that's that's that's I'm telling you from
Speaker 2: personal life experience throughout my throughout several you know, epochs.
Speaker 2: I've had several epochs of my life, you know where
Speaker 2: where I've I've been, uh, you know, kind of kind
Speaker 2: of obsessed with that realm. And that's that's just when
Speaker 2: you know you're fucked because you're like kind of taking
Speaker 2: time away from developing your own life into this realm
Speaker 2: of like I need to find another person to make
Speaker 2: me feel okay. Uh And when when your brain is there,
Speaker 2: you've taken a wrong turn.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like it's really hard, dude. Yeah, I get you,
Speaker 2: it's really hard. What are you gonna say it?
Speaker 5: It's like really easy to like look at that and
Speaker 5: think like, oh, look, those people are happy all the time. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 5: it seems it's it always seems nice, and then I
Speaker 5: try to do it and it's like it makes me
Speaker 5: feel worse than I did before.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah yeah. What have you been able?
Speaker 6: Like?
Speaker 2: Does anything? What does anything make you happy?
Speaker 5: But yeah, i'd say I I'm very comfortable with myself. Like,
Speaker 5: like I I ideally I want to like to a
Speaker 5: place where I can feel comfortable talking to people, you know,
Speaker 5: But like, as as long as I'm by my by myself,
Speaker 5: I feel like I'm pretty chill by myself. I'm playing
Speaker 5: video games. Uh, work is fine, uh, and I run,
Speaker 5: So I got really good going myself. I'm not just
Speaker 5: like I'm not just sitting in my house playing video
Speaker 5: games all day. I'm like running and staying kind of
Speaker 5: in shape, you know. So it's it's good mentally.
Speaker 2: That's great. Yeah, I don't know. I think, uh, I've
Speaker 2: really been I think I've probably talked about this on
Speaker 2: the podcast before, but I've been thinking so much about
Speaker 2: how much of like happiness or whatever is internal versus external,
Speaker 2: and I think it's a little bit of both. And
Speaker 2: it's like, yeah, you know, of course, uh uh, this
Speaker 2: external part of my life, of of my relationships. Maybe
Speaker 2: it would be better if if I wasn't alone. But
Speaker 2: you can't sacrifice the your internal calmness in a desperate
Speaker 2: attempt to get there. You know, you got to get there,
Speaker 2: you know, you know what I mean?
Speaker 5: Yeah, I think so.
Speaker 2: So I don't know. Delete tender God's side. Uh, eat
Speaker 2: a eat a slice of pizza.
Speaker 5: I do enjoy I don't. I like the sound of that.
Speaker 5: I We'll say.
Speaker 2: What's your name again? I'm Gabe Gabe. Well, Gabe, is
Speaker 2: there anything else you want to have to talk about
Speaker 2: before we go?
Speaker 5: No, but have a have a great rest of your day, you.
Speaker 2: Too, Take care man, all right later, Gabe? What a name? Gabe? Gabe? Gabe?
Speaker 2: Who is Gabe? What is Gabe? Why is Gabe? How
Speaker 2: is Gabe? How is Gabe? Gabe's doing? Okay?
Speaker 5: Hello?
Speaker 2: Hi there? What's your name? Sir?
Speaker 1: Uh?
Speaker 2: Rusty Rusty? I like that name. Yeah. Where are you from? Rusty?
Speaker 5: Uh? From Missouri? Then Oklahoma and now I'm in Texas.
Speaker 2: It's quite a journey, yep. It is.
Speaker 5: I'm twenty two and.
Speaker 2: H what inspired you to call a gecko on the phone.
Speaker 5: Dude, I've been listening listening to your show for a
Speaker 5: while now. I love it, dog, It's thank you. I
Speaker 5: listened to it all the time. I try and save
Speaker 5: it for drives. But yeah, dude, I've just been wanting
Speaker 5: to talk to you for a little bit.
Speaker 2: Thank you. Man. Well, was there anything in particular that
Speaker 2: you wanted to talk about?
Speaker 5: Ash? There's been so much, but most recently, I guess
Speaker 5: I moved in with my girlfriend's family two months or no,
Speaker 5: it was before two months, when before we were into
Speaker 5: dating or whatever. Yeah, after two months of knowing each other,
Speaker 5: they asked me to move in with them, and I
Speaker 5: was like fuck it, wing on and so now I'm
Speaker 5: in Texas for the summer.
Speaker 2: M H. Where were you? Where were you living? Where
Speaker 2: were you living before you were living in Oaklands?
Speaker 5: I was no, I was living in Oklahoma. I go
Speaker 5: to I go to school in Oklahoma, and I was
Speaker 5: living in like the campus apartments and school was ending,
Speaker 5: and like we started dating in February and she was like,
Speaker 5: why don't you come, like move in with us? Yeah,
Speaker 5: And the way that happened was I took her up
Speaker 5: to Missouri to meet my family, which wasn't a great
Speaker 5: ex experience. But at the same time, it was she
Speaker 5: only cried once?
Speaker 2: So why was Why was she only cried once? Why
Speaker 2: was it a bad experience?
Speaker 5: H dude? My family is they're intense. There's six of us.
Speaker 5: I have three siblings, and it's non stop, like chittering,
Speaker 5: everybody like fighting and ship and it's like it'll wear
Speaker 5: you down.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm.
Speaker 5: Everybody's always arguing.
Speaker 3: Mm hmm.
Speaker 2: What's the vibe like at her place?
Speaker 5: Oh, it's amazing. I love her. I love her family.
Speaker 5: It's awesome. It's quiet. She's got an older brother but
Speaker 5: he's moved out. And then she's got a younger brother.
Speaker 5: He's autistic, but he's he's an awesome dude. I love
Speaker 5: to hang out with him.
Speaker 3: Alan.
Speaker 2: Now why why? Uh no? What was I going to
Speaker 2: ask you? I was going to ask you why anything?
Speaker 2: I guess you. So, you guys have known each other
Speaker 2: for two months, and how did you meet her again?
Speaker 5: We met on hinge dating it meant to be deleted.
Speaker 2: Cool and after two and it's I mean, that's just
Speaker 2: interesting to me that after two months. Her family is
Speaker 2: totally cool with you just crashing there.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, I know. I mean now it's it's like
Speaker 5: four months at this point. But yeah, this happened in
Speaker 5: very much like May. I think, Yeah, this happened in May.
Speaker 2: So you you just graduated, you just graduated from college.
Speaker 2: What was your plan going to be if you if
Speaker 2: you didn't end up living with her? Were you just
Speaker 2: going to go back home?
Speaker 5: I hadn't graduated yet. I have I have like free
Speaker 5: summer housing. So I just left all my ship up there.
Speaker 5: I was going to be alone up there because I
Speaker 5: didn't want to go back home.
Speaker 2: Oh so you're oh, okay, so you you have a
Speaker 2: place to say, you're just staying with her over the summer. Okay,
Speaker 2: So yeah, so you're just staying with her over the summer.
Speaker 2: It's not like a, hey, I need somewhere to live
Speaker 2: with you. But okay, I.
Speaker 5: Mean I haven't done anything not risky. But I don't know,
Speaker 5: I just jumped into it. You know, I haven't really
Speaker 5: done anything like that before.
Speaker 2: And why do you feel like you jumped into it?
Speaker 5: Ah, ship, that's some heavy stuff.
Speaker 2: I don't difficult question.
Speaker 5: No, You're good. I don't know I really like her.
Speaker 5: I love her.
Speaker 2: It's nice. That's nice.
Speaker 5: And I knew I loved her when when she asked me.
Speaker 5: But yeah, i've been I've been. This last year has
Speaker 5: been hell and I've been struggling. And then you know,
Speaker 5: she came in and it was like everything was happy.
Speaker 2: It is you know, why why you don't have potograph
Speaker 2: if you want to? But why do you feel like
Speaker 2: you're struggling? Ah?
Speaker 5: Dog? So I was dating this one girl for we
Speaker 5: were together for like six years, right, and she she
Speaker 5: cheated in October, and you know that just kind of
Speaker 5: like that kind of broke me, and I let it
Speaker 5: break me, you know. Instead of going to the gym,
Speaker 5: I just like sat in my room like a rotted
Speaker 5: And then I'm also a student athlete and so like
Speaker 5: that was also tanking. My mental health and my grades
Speaker 5: were slipping, and it's just kind of like a downward spiral,
Speaker 5: like really fast. I don't think anybody really knew how
Speaker 5: bad it was, except maybe the the therapist. But yeah,
Speaker 5: I'm better know.
Speaker 2: Nice man, what do you was studying in school?
Speaker 5: Biomedical science?
Speaker 2: Uh? And you're gonna are you gonna go be You're
Speaker 2: gonna go be a doctor.
Speaker 5: Guy, Dude, I don't fucking I don't fucking know. I uh,
Speaker 5: I feel like the longer I'm in school, the dumber
Speaker 5: I get, and I feel I feel I feel like
Speaker 5: I peaked in like middle school, and I've just been
Speaker 5: getting stupid or ever since. But I don't even know.
Speaker 2: I mean, that's how I would feel if I was
Speaker 2: studying anything with the name biomedical in it.
Speaker 5: I guess. But I failed genetics twice, which is what
Speaker 5: I wanted to do. I wanted to be like a
Speaker 5: genetic research.
Speaker 2: You wanted to play.
Speaker 5: Failed exactly, but I failed it twice. Not because it's hard,
Speaker 5: but because I just I gave up this past year
Speaker 5: and I'm sick of smol.
Speaker 2: So, So what's the what's the plan? You're when do
Speaker 2: you graduate?
Speaker 5: I have like twenty hours left, so two semesters. I
Speaker 5: don't know, Spring twenty twenty five.
Speaker 2: Okay, do you know what you want to do when
Speaker 2: you graduate?
Speaker 4: Uh?
Speaker 5: No, nope, I uh maybe masters and like wildlife stuff.
Speaker 5: I like the outdoors. Okay, I don't know, Doug.
Speaker 2: I'm still you should you should get your masters in hawks?
Speaker 5: Is this like a hawk to a joke? Are you
Speaker 5: setting that up or something.
Speaker 2: No, No, why hawks? You know why? I just picked
Speaker 2: it because it was a fun word to say at
Speaker 2: the time. Hawk hawk. That's cool. I mean you can
Speaker 2: I I that's cool. You're gonna get a You're gonna
Speaker 2: get a degree in in the animals kinda.
Speaker 5: Butay, yeah, I saw a video of a hawk killing
Speaker 5: the goose the other day.
Speaker 2: Are you on that? Are you on that? Subreddit? It's
Speaker 2: something like nature is Metal? You know I'm talking about I.
Speaker 5: Used to be in. I got Perma Band from Reddit.
Speaker 5: I don't even know why.
Speaker 2: Why? All right, you know why? Why did you get
Speaker 2: pera band from Reddit? I don't know you I must
Speaker 2: have an idea.
Speaker 5: I can't stand dumbasses. Everybody everybody on Reddit a dumbass.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry you got hold on. I got Perma Band
Speaker 2: from Reddit because I can't stand dumbasses. Sounds like you
Speaker 2: know why you got banned?
Speaker 5: There was okay, there was a lot. I don't know
Speaker 5: who reported me.
Speaker 2: Who did you? Who did you tell to kill themselves?
Speaker 5: Okay, nothing like that. I wouldn't do that. I don't know.
Speaker 5: It's just like a hive line of of I don't know. Next,
Speaker 5: beird de generously, I'll you know.
Speaker 2: I'll say this. I really, I really mean it. I
Speaker 2: just I kind of disagree. I think of like all
Speaker 2: the social media platforms like where people are chatting about
Speaker 2: ship between, like Twitter and TikTok and Instagram and Reddit.
Speaker 2: I like Reddit the most, I really do, because I
Speaker 2: feel like Reddit is the only one that's like mostly adults,
Speaker 2: you know what I mean? Because you no, no, no,
Speaker 2: you you got me? You have you got me?
Speaker 5: You you I heard you saying that and I was like,
Speaker 5: this is such, this is some shit I'd read in
Speaker 5: the comments about like I don't know, but no. Reddit
Speaker 5: is was the only social media I had and I
Speaker 5: got banned from it, and like, I don't have anything.
Speaker 2: Now now you're free. You don't you don't you don't
Speaker 2: have you don't have anything?
Speaker 5: No I am yeah, I don't have TikTok. I used
Speaker 5: to and then like it it takes a lot of time,
Speaker 5: and so I just deleted it. And the comments on
Speaker 5: some videos are just stupid. So I deleted that. I
Speaker 5: don't have Instagram. It's a lot of work.
Speaker 2: And what do you do? What do you do with
Speaker 2: your time? What do you do when when you are
Speaker 2: sitting around doing nothing?
Speaker 5: Well, during the school year, I'm like going to practice,
Speaker 5: I'm playing some video games. I'm working out doing school stuff,
Speaker 5: and like now in the summer, I'm playing video games
Speaker 5: working out and I kind of sit on my ass
Speaker 5: all day until it's time to go to work.
Speaker 2: Okay, well, so you're playing video games.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, I.
Speaker 2: I I debated. So when I started getting back into
Speaker 2: video games, like, uh a year or two ago, I
Speaker 2: was debating if it was like a waste of time.
Speaker 2: And I noticed that I waste a lot of my
Speaker 2: time unconsciously because I'm just sitting and scrolling and re
Speaker 2: checking and this and that thing. And It's like, if
Speaker 2: I'm gonna quote waste time, at least I want to
Speaker 2: do it consciously. Like if I'm going to spend thirty
Speaker 2: hours doing something, I'd rather be, you know, taking in
Speaker 2: a good story, piece of art, whatever it is, instead
Speaker 2: of like just looking at random crap on TikTok and
Speaker 2: Instagram and looking at the you know, some person I
Speaker 2: met at a bar once their trip to grease type
Speaker 2: of shit.
Speaker 5: Huh. I see that.
Speaker 2: Like, like video games are more conscious choice. I don't
Speaker 2: feel like my my you can't really like accidentally put
Speaker 2: as much game hours into video games as you can
Speaker 2: to your stupid phone.
Speaker 5: I don't know, man, So some people some games you can.
Speaker 2: Get addicted toying.
Speaker 5: Right now, I'm on like a rotation Rainbow and Diablo fo.
Speaker 5: The other rotation is Overwatch and like Minecraft. Oh no,
Speaker 5: Stardoo Valley.
Speaker 2: Stardo Valet. Oh you're a cozy gamer. Oh yeah, well
Speaker 2: you're a cozy little guy.
Speaker 5: I'll play a little bit of everything, but like I
Speaker 5: like sup not a lot and started Valley is not
Speaker 5: t That thing is it's.
Speaker 2: You're breaking up. You can't hear what thing you're saying.
Speaker 5: That game strees me out. Start.
Speaker 2: What's your name again, Rusty Shad Rusty, you did not
Speaker 2: have to give me your full name. We're gonna cut
Speaker 2: that out. We're gonna we I don't want people looking
Speaker 2: at you up.
Speaker 5: It's from King of the Hill.
Speaker 2: That's from King of the Hills. Yeah, okay, and I
Speaker 2: never watched King of the Hill.
Speaker 5: Oh miss now, well.
Speaker 2: Rusty, you seem like a sweet guy. I hope that, uh,
Speaker 2: everything works out okay with your Like this is your
Speaker 2: It don't sounding like you moved in. It sounds like
Speaker 2: it's an extended stay.
Speaker 5: No, dude, I thought it would be like temporary, so
Speaker 5: I only have like seven shirts, and like I just
Speaker 5: I like, do launder every four days or something?
Speaker 2: Is it bad? Is it? Is it bad that when
Speaker 2: you said seven shirts, I was like, what do you
Speaker 2: mean you only have seven shirts?
Speaker 5: Well, I thought I was gonna be here for like
Speaker 5: a weekend a week.
Speaker 2: I feel like a seven seven shirts is a lot
Speaker 2: of shirts. That's one shirt every day for the week.
Speaker 2: I know, well no, but you were just saying, you
Speaker 2: were saying it like it wasn't a lot of shirts.
Speaker 2: I think seven shirts. I'm just saying you might have
Speaker 2: more shirt Like if you were to combine all the
Speaker 2: people in the universe, like what eight billion people and
Speaker 2: uh like average out however many shirts everyone? I think
Speaker 2: you have like significantly more shirts than the average person.
Speaker 5: Oh that's that's a that's a slippery slope because the
Speaker 5: average number of fingers on everybody's hands in the world
Speaker 5: is less than ten.
Speaker 2: Get the fuck out of here, Rusty. Is there anything
Speaker 2: else you want to say to the people of the
Speaker 2: computer But yeah, oh you have two things. Tell me
Speaker 2: your two things.
Speaker 5: Two things. One, I'm the guy that comments about his
Speaker 5: poops on your on your Spotify thing.
Speaker 2: Oh you're that guy. No, I no, I have no idea.
Speaker 2: I have no idea what you're talking about at all.
Speaker 5: Well, dude, you pinned like three of them.
Speaker 2: I've never pinned anything for I've never pinned anything from
Speaker 2: that Who.
Speaker 5: Keeps pitting my comments then, because I'll talk about maybe
Speaker 5: it's a great, great show.
Speaker 2: Maybe it's the spot Maybe it's the Spotify editorial team.
Speaker 2: They thought your poop comments were worthy of of of publishing.
Speaker 2: What's the second thing?
Speaker 5: You know? I've always thought about this moment about when
Speaker 5: you would ask me this, okay, and I had so
Speaker 5: many great witty things. But now I'm no, that's lame.
Speaker 2: That's lame. That's lame. What what what do you feel?
Speaker 2: What do you just? What are you feeling? What's up?
Speaker 2: Be honest?
Speaker 5: Smoke gass and eat grass.
Speaker 2: Thank you, rest you have a go on you two dogs.
Speaker 5: Bye.
Speaker 2: No, don't don't think of a cool thing to say.
Speaker 2: Just say whatever is in your in your brain. Man. Hello, folks,
Speaker 2: it's Lyle here. That's the end of this episode. But
Speaker 2: get this, I'm releasing a bonus episode this week. That's right,
Speaker 2: an entire extra hour of the podcast that you can
Speaker 2: listen to by becoming a premium member of Therapy Gecko
Speaker 2: over at therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com. Super Cast
Speaker 2: subscribers get access to bonus episodes, They get a completely
Speaker 2: ad free podcast feed of the regular show, they get
Speaker 2: recordings from my live shows, members only streams, and they
Speaker 2: help support my ability to continue doing this podcast. So
Speaker 2: here's a clip from this week's members only bonus episode.
Speaker 3: When I was fourteen, my mother sent me to a
Speaker 3: conversion camp in Tennessee. And this was not only for
Speaker 3: like gay people, but like my mom said it to
Speaker 3: me because she thought I was gay. I am, but
Speaker 3: non relevant and so like it was really fucking crazy.
Speaker 2: How long were you in this camp for?
Speaker 3: I was only for a year and a few months.
Speaker 2: That's a lot of time to be in a conversion camp.
Speaker 3: Some people stay there for years.
Speaker 2: Really what and you were fourteen?
Speaker 3: Yes, it got shut down by the government eventually, so
Speaker 3: it's okay to talk about now, Like there's no legally
Speaker 3: I mean anything, okay. And there was a girl there
Speaker 3: that tried to like kill all of us.
Speaker 2: There's a girl who tried to you. Yeah, if you
Speaker 2: want to hear this full conversation, you can sign up
Speaker 2: to become a Premium member at therapy Gecko dot supercast
Speaker 2: dot com, or find the link in the episode description
Speaker 2: that's therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com. All right, I
Speaker 2: have nothing else to say.
Speaker 6: Goes on the line, taking your phone calls every night.
Speaker 2: Goes he's teaching you aloud.
Speaker 5: Life is not expert