Speaker 1: Ruby.
Speaker 2: I am Alicia Bridges. I was diagnosed with crisis at
Speaker 2: seven years old, and it took me a little over
Speaker 2: two decades to find an effective treatment. I remember when
Speaker 2: I was younger, I had very flaky, dry knees and elbows,
Speaker 2: but we just thought that I had really dry skin.
Speaker 2: At my entire body was covered with itchy, flaky, brown,
Speaker 2: crusty patches of dry and flamed skin. It cracked, it bled,
Speaker 2: It sometimes felt like my body was being attacked by ants.
Speaker 2: And my grandmother took me to the doctor. They surveyed
Speaker 2: my skin and determined that I had sarries.
Speaker 3: Alicia tried every treatment possible, topicals, oral medicines, even a
Speaker 3: tar treatment, but nothing brought more than temporary relief. The
Speaker 3: frustration began to take a toll.
Speaker 2: I just remember being like, I'm going to have this
Speaker 2: condition for the rest of my life and there's nothing
Speaker 2: that I can do about it.
Speaker 1: I stopped going to the doctor, I stopped.
Speaker 2: Trying to find treatments, and I said in that for
Speaker 2: about two years.
Speaker 3: Even with the shame and discouragement, Alicia bravely shared her
Speaker 3: story speaking at National Soriasis Foundation events across the country.
Speaker 3: It was at these events that she eventually connected with
Speaker 3: doctor Wiseman, who would finally bring her the life changing
Speaker 3: relief she had been searching for.
Speaker 2: And so there was an event in Atlanta, Georgia, a
Speaker 2: National Soriasis event, and I went, I can't even remember
Speaker 2: what the event was about, but I do remember meaning
Speaker 2: doctor wise.
Speaker 1: So we started having a conversation and.
Speaker 2: She was like, I can get you cleared up, and
Speaker 2: so I set up an appointment with her. She surveyed
Speaker 2: my skin. Of course, She's like, you have a very
Speaker 2: severe case of plexiasis, but I have this biologic and
Speaker 2: so she gave me my first biologic and it cleared
Speaker 2: me up about eighty percent. And let me tell you,
Speaker 2: I was as happy as can be.
Speaker 3: Welcome to House Calls. I'm Lauren Bray Pacheco. On these
Speaker 3: special segments, we'll check in with friends from former Symptomatic
Speaker 3: episodes for updates on their health and lives since we
Speaker 3: last connected. Alicia, it is so good to speak with
Speaker 3: you again.
Speaker 1: It's nice to speak with you as well. It's been
Speaker 1: a little while.
Speaker 3: I can't believe it's almost been a year. November of
Speaker 3: last year when we first connected. Yeah, and I have
Speaker 3: to tell you your episode is one that many people
Speaker 3: reference when they talk about the courage of someone coming
Speaker 3: forward and being so honest and open about their struggles
Speaker 3: with their health. Have you had any kind of reaction
Speaker 3: of people who listen to the episode.
Speaker 2: You know, I had some family check in with me
Speaker 2: and kind of be like, Wow, I didn't know you
Speaker 2: know what you were dealing with internally, So that was
Speaker 2: nice to hear.
Speaker 3: You talked a lot about how for you really finding
Speaker 3: self acceptance was a big part of this puzzle piece,
Speaker 3: and I love the fact that you came to that
Speaker 3: realization before you even found what ended up being for
Speaker 3: you the silver bullet. Why was that something that you
Speaker 3: knew you had to heal before your skin even did.
Speaker 2: Because I think that self esteem and confidence and self
Speaker 2: worth are universal themes that you really have to own
Speaker 2: in and focus on in your life outside of chronic illnesses.
Speaker 2: It's just so imperative to have that love for you
Speaker 2: in confidence for your self day to day, regardless if
Speaker 2: I have psoriasis or not. Because if it's not poriasis,
Speaker 2: then it's the pressures of social media. If it's not
Speaker 2: the pressures of social media, then it's the pressures of
Speaker 2: beauty standards. If it's not that, it's dating and expectations.
Speaker 2: So that's why it was really important for me to
Speaker 2: get a hold on that.
Speaker 3: I think that there is something, particularly when you're dealing
Speaker 3: with the chronic illness that has physical manifestations, you have
Speaker 3: the insecurity constantly that you're going to be judged or
Speaker 3: rejected because of your physicality, And when it's something that
Speaker 3: you can't help and you're desperately trying to conceal, it
Speaker 3: probably just feels like you're in fight and flight constantly.
Speaker 3: Every social situation becomes an opportunity for rejection as opposed
Speaker 3: to just an opportunity.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's interesting because in the last year I've been
Speaker 2: reflecting on why I feel anxiety. Didn't even realize this,
Speaker 2: but I think I have some social anxiety.
Speaker 1: I do stand up comedy, which is kind of hard.
Speaker 2: To have social anxiety when you're in stand up and oftentimes,
Speaker 2: especially in the beginning, like I would be so afraid
Speaker 2: to like get on stage, even like having successful shows.
Speaker 2: And then as I evaluated that, I realized that it's
Speaker 2: social anxiety. I realize that I have a real fear
Speaker 2: of being judged, not only being judged, but being shamed.
Speaker 2: And being rejected, and then I did some further evaluation,
Speaker 2: like Okay, where does that come from? And I really
Speaker 2: think that it comes from being tall all my life,
Speaker 2: like since I was seven, always being tall, always standing out,
Speaker 2: and having soariasis. It's like always this dark cloud of
Speaker 2: like here is an opportunity for someone to reject you,
Speaker 2: to shame you, Here's an opportunity where you might show
Speaker 2: up and be perceived as not good enough. So that
Speaker 2: definitely has been a challenge, and I often wonder how
Speaker 2: much of the sooriasis is associated with how I view
Speaker 2: anxiety and overwhelm.
Speaker 3: Now, it is so interesting to see the way in
Speaker 3: which your disease, like your lack of ease within your
Speaker 3: own skin, shaped not only your personality but gave you courage.
Speaker 3: Stand up comedy is terrifying to most people. To put
Speaker 3: yourself out there and to let people judge you in
Speaker 3: that moment, with laughter or not. It's very interesting that
Speaker 3: this is what you're drawn to. What was it about
Speaker 3: stand up comedy that called to you.
Speaker 2: I've always been like this fun, witty personality in general,
Speaker 2: which again probably stems from having the risis, because you
Speaker 2: have to connect in a way with people that have
Speaker 2: nothing to do with your looks because you're afraid that
Speaker 2: your looks won't be good enough. So I've learned to
Speaker 2: kind of be caresmatic and to understand how to connect
Speaker 2: with people in a meaningful, authentic, and deep way. I
Speaker 2: went to see a friend years ago perform comedy, and
Speaker 2: as everyone was coming across the stage, I was like,
Speaker 2: I can do that.
Speaker 1: I can definitely do that.
Speaker 2: You know, I've done public speaking and people have told
Speaker 2: me that I have this personality. So I just started
Speaker 2: to do it and it challenged me and continues to
Speaker 2: challenge me to confront not feeling good enough or fearing
Speaker 2: that I'm not going to be perceived in the way
Speaker 2: that I want to be perceived. And one thing about
Speaker 2: comedy is like it's up and down, Like, for example,
Speaker 2: I did a show the other day and the audience
Speaker 2: was just not my demographic and it we're not feeling
Speaker 2: my stuff.
Speaker 1: And in that moment, you can perceive that as rejection.
Speaker 2: Like it gets real awkward when you're up there giving
Speaker 2: the best ten minutes of your life and people are
Speaker 2: staring back at you like, uh, what is this?
Speaker 3: Yeah, those ten minutes can feel like ten years.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, I'm telling you. But it's so funny
Speaker 2: because five years ago that would have caused me to
Speaker 2: like want to quit comedy. And when it happened, I
Speaker 2: was just like, Okay, let's push through these feelings. This
Speaker 2: is only ten minutes. This is not going to make
Speaker 2: or break my career. The circumstances that this is an
Speaker 2: older crowd that's really out of my demographic and if
Speaker 2: I want to make them laugh, either I have to
Speaker 2: come up with jokes that fit their lifestyle or I
Speaker 2: need to stick to my demographic.
Speaker 1: But that's the solution to it.
Speaker 2: It's no reason to feel shame, it's no reason to
Speaker 2: be embarrassed. It's just identifying what the circumstances are and
Speaker 2: being okay with that, Like this is a part of
Speaker 2: the process, and so it's really helping me to kind
Speaker 2: of confront all perspectives of my life in that same way.
Speaker 3: That's where the self love comes in as well, because
Speaker 3: you don't place your value in terms of the acceptance
Speaker 3: of others.
Speaker 2: Yes, one thousand percent, you said that in such a
Speaker 2: beautiful way, and it just sparked a fire in me
Speaker 2: when you said that is really about not putting your
Speaker 2: value in the hands of other people, whether it's a
Speaker 2: comedy audience, whether it's a man that I'm dating, whether
Speaker 2: it's a person at the nail shop that doesn't understand
Speaker 2: psoriasis and they reject me, whether it's not being chosen.
Speaker 1: For I don't know, a modeling gig or whatever.
Speaker 2: It's just understanding my value without it being contingent upon
Speaker 2: what other people think of me.
Speaker 3: And so, how are you doing today, because I believe
Speaker 3: you said you started your last treatment in twenty twenty.
Speaker 1: Is it still working.
Speaker 2: It's still working. Well, it's working great. I'm one hundred
Speaker 2: percent clear. The challenge now is that I recently lost
Speaker 2: my job or quit my job, and now I'm worried
Speaker 2: about insurance and ensuring that I can continue receiving my medicine. Luckily,
Speaker 2: I only have to get the treatment every twelve weeks,
Speaker 2: so that gives me some time to get a new
Speaker 2: position so I can continue my medicine. But this is
Speaker 2: just another example of like, even though the psoriasis is clear,
Speaker 2: there's still always some challenges because of this disease. Because
Speaker 2: now the challenge is finding insurance, ensuring that that insurance
Speaker 2: covers my treatment, and just going through the whole process
Speaker 2: again of a copay program and prior authorization, So it
Speaker 2: just feels like there's always something even when things are
Speaker 2: going good.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because there's maintenance involved. It's not as if it
Speaker 3: was a one and done kind of deal.
Speaker 1: Exactly.
Speaker 3: Have you had the opportunity to pay that forward in
Speaker 3: terms of your advocacy. Have you had the chance to
Speaker 3: really see the comfort that sharing your story has brought
Speaker 3: to other young people.
Speaker 1: Absolutely.
Speaker 2: People often write me on social media and let me know,
Speaker 2: you know, oh, I saw an article, I heard you
Speaker 2: on the podcast, and it really touched my spirit. I
Speaker 2: also volunteer at Camp Discovery, which is a camp sponsor
Speaker 2: by the AAD American Academy of Dermatology, and it's for
Speaker 2: kids who are living with skin diseases. But it's such
Speaker 2: a blessing to work with those kids from a place
Speaker 2: that I know exactly what it is that they're going
Speaker 2: through when they're out in the world trying to navigate
Speaker 2: their skin conditions. So it's such a blessing to be
Speaker 2: able to connect with them in such a meaningful, productive way.
Speaker 1: So I am always.
Speaker 2: Encountered by people in different situations as to how my
Speaker 2: story has influenced and impact them to try to live
Speaker 2: and overcome their condition.
Speaker 3: And to bring them comfort and the reassurance that they
Speaker 3: don't have to feel shame or blame themselves exactly. So, Alicia,
Speaker 3: what is next on your list of things to tackle?
Speaker 1: I'm always looking for a new adventure.
Speaker 2: I recently bought a violin because it's something that I
Speaker 2: did when I was like ten years old, but I
Speaker 2: didn't get a chance to continue it. So that's one
Speaker 2: way I'm currently trying to honor my inner child is
Speaker 2: by teaching myself how to play the violin.
Speaker 1: I'm really into plants.
Speaker 2: I've become a plant mom in the last couple of years.
Speaker 1: Actually wrote a book.
Speaker 2: It's called Dig Deeper, a twenty one week Guide to
Speaker 2: Self Discovery through Plants. And in the book, I talk
Speaker 2: about my journey with psoriasis as well as having parents
Speaker 2: with substance abuse issues, and I talk about how I've
Speaker 2: learned the process of growth through caring for my plants.
Speaker 2: So like just doing more of that, connecting with people
Speaker 2: and plant care and just finding new ways to challenge myself.
Speaker 1: So, yeah, that's what's going on with me right now.
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, I'm getting that book I'm not joking.
Speaker 3: I'm going to write it down because I'm a serial
Speaker 3: plant killer unfortunately. Yes, Alicia, I just want to thank
Speaker 3: you so much for taking the time to update us,
Speaker 3: and I'm so happy that you're doing so well and
Speaker 3: I cannot wait to follow what you next take on
Speaker 3: in the years to come.
Speaker 2: I really appreciate it, and thank you for having me
Speaker 2: here today. This is great catching.
Speaker 3: Up absolutely on next week's episode of Symptomatic, Mick Zaison
Speaker 3: didn't think much of her severe acne and early onset
Speaker 3: periods at first, assuming they would pass on their own,
Speaker 3: but her symptoms quickly escalated to frequent UTIs, bladder pain
Speaker 3: and bloody urination, upending her entire life.
Speaker 4: All of my blood tests are perfectly fine, all my
Speaker 4: CT scans are perfectly fine. And I was at a loss, like,
Speaker 4: am I really just making this up? I'm looking down
Speaker 4: in the toilet and I'm seeing red and no one's
Speaker 4: helping me.
Speaker 3: This has been house calls. Thanks for listening, and we
Speaker 3: would love to hear from you too. You can email
Speaker 3: us at Symptomatic at iHeartMedia dot com with thoughts about
Speaker 3: other episodes or to share a medical mystery of your own.
Speaker 3: Until next time, be well,