1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:03,800 Speaker 1: All right, special episode today, and this is impactful stuff. 2 00:00:04,040 --> 00:00:04,520 Speaker 2: In fact, I. 3 00:00:06,440 --> 00:00:10,559 Speaker 1: Broke down a little bit on here, but a tough subject. 4 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:14,680 Speaker 1: And part of it is this, when you go through 5 00:00:15,280 --> 00:00:18,959 Speaker 1: extreme loss, you will hear people that are searching and 6 00:00:19,040 --> 00:00:23,520 Speaker 1: reaching and stabbing, sometimes out of anger, and so you'll 7 00:00:23,520 --> 00:00:30,240 Speaker 1: hear things like you're profiting on your son's death. Are 8 00:00:30,280 --> 00:00:41,000 Speaker 1: we let's unpack it? Well, this is a special conversation. 9 00:00:41,200 --> 00:00:42,720 Speaker 1: Been wanting to have this for a long time. 10 00:00:42,920 --> 00:00:43,280 Speaker 2: Amber. 11 00:00:43,360 --> 00:00:47,080 Speaker 1: My wife is here with the ant man and we're 12 00:00:47,120 --> 00:00:50,479 Speaker 1: discussing a brand new book that came out today, The 13 00:00:50,520 --> 00:00:54,640 Speaker 1: Girl on the Bathroom Floor. And you have been working 14 00:00:54,680 --> 00:00:58,920 Speaker 1: on this book, Babe, When do you think you first started. 15 00:00:58,600 --> 00:00:59,960 Speaker 3: This closet of two years ago? 16 00:01:00,520 --> 00:01:05,520 Speaker 1: Two years People have compared it to like an album 17 00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:09,080 Speaker 1: making an album, and I'm like, no, it actually takes 18 00:01:09,120 --> 00:01:12,760 Speaker 1: a lot longer. The process of a book is much 19 00:01:12,800 --> 00:01:18,080 Speaker 1: longer and tedious than an album. Two years ago you 20 00:01:18,360 --> 00:01:20,560 Speaker 1: wrote the first part of it is. 21 00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:24,800 Speaker 3: That that was my first contact. Kyle, your editor put 22 00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:28,560 Speaker 3: me in contact with my acquisition's editor, Lisa Joe over 23 00:01:28,600 --> 00:01:31,000 Speaker 3: at w and we kind of began the process of 24 00:01:31,040 --> 00:01:33,520 Speaker 3: talking about the book and maybe starting it. 25 00:01:34,640 --> 00:01:40,800 Speaker 1: What was the first thing you wrote for it. 26 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:44,840 Speaker 3: Oh, it's a good question, because she wanted me to 27 00:01:44,920 --> 00:01:47,560 Speaker 3: chapter dump and just write a like open up ten 28 00:01:47,600 --> 00:01:51,520 Speaker 3: Microsoft Waard documents and start writing things. Probably the pool, 29 00:01:51,920 --> 00:01:55,200 Speaker 3: probably what happened when I first heard those words river 30 00:01:55,240 --> 00:01:56,960 Speaker 3: and pool. I think I started with that story. 31 00:01:58,120 --> 00:02:01,480 Speaker 1: So this has been something I've pushed you for doing 32 00:02:01,640 --> 00:02:05,640 Speaker 1: for a while, because you know, I felt like your 33 00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:09,760 Speaker 1: story is unique enough from separate from like a river, 34 00:02:10,639 --> 00:02:13,600 Speaker 1: that it would actually compliment like a river or stand 35 00:02:13,639 --> 00:02:17,880 Speaker 1: on its own. And so then I read it several 36 00:02:17,880 --> 00:02:19,920 Speaker 1: months ago when you finished the first draft, and I 37 00:02:20,040 --> 00:02:24,040 Speaker 1: was like confirmed on I mean, a lot of it 38 00:02:24,120 --> 00:02:27,280 Speaker 1: was new to me. I lived through this book, but 39 00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:29,200 Speaker 1: a lot of it was new to me. Like I 40 00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:31,000 Speaker 1: didn't know I was on tour. I didn't know that 41 00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:35,120 Speaker 1: that happened. I didn't know the doughnut, the donut shop thing. 42 00:02:36,560 --> 00:02:39,040 Speaker 1: I didn't know all that. A lot of the special 43 00:02:39,080 --> 00:02:45,240 Speaker 1: times you had with RIV, I didn't know. So we 44 00:02:45,320 --> 00:02:49,000 Speaker 1: lost our son in twenty nineteen, and I wrote a 45 00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:52,040 Speaker 1: book called Like a River, a memoir for it, and 46 00:02:52,080 --> 00:02:55,160 Speaker 1: then you wrote now this the Girl in the Bathroom Floor. 47 00:02:56,680 --> 00:02:59,000 Speaker 1: Can you tell me about the title. 48 00:03:00,120 --> 00:03:03,720 Speaker 3: Yeah, it came from you. I had wrestled with a 49 00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:07,639 Speaker 3: bunch of different titles and topics, and everything that I 50 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:09,880 Speaker 3: had said, you said was too boring. It sounded like 51 00:03:09,919 --> 00:03:11,960 Speaker 3: a Bible study. You're like, no, that's not it, No, 52 00:03:12,040 --> 00:03:15,480 Speaker 3: that's not Give me an example from Grief to Glory. Yeah, 53 00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:17,960 Speaker 3: it was one of them, and you were like, no, 54 00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:20,560 Speaker 3: it sounds too much like a Bible study. And that's 55 00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:23,080 Speaker 3: something that if somebody is not wanting to go into 56 00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:25,040 Speaker 3: Glory or the Lord, they're just going to walk right 57 00:03:25,080 --> 00:03:26,680 Speaker 3: past that book and not pick it up. Yeah, it's 58 00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:29,440 Speaker 3: like you want the title to grab somebody. You want 59 00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:31,160 Speaker 3: it to be exactly where you were. You want it 60 00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:33,280 Speaker 3: to be raw and real. And you were the girl 61 00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:35,760 Speaker 3: on the bathroom floor. And when we heard it, we 62 00:03:35,760 --> 00:03:38,600 Speaker 3: were like whoa. And everyone that has heard it since 63 00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:41,839 Speaker 3: then was just like, Wow, that's the perfect title. That's 64 00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:45,240 Speaker 3: where so many women and men go to grieve or 65 00:03:45,280 --> 00:03:46,320 Speaker 3: to lament, or to hide. 66 00:03:47,600 --> 00:03:50,240 Speaker 2: You have not read it at man, obviously you haven't. 67 00:03:50,400 --> 00:03:54,800 Speaker 4: No, So I read like a river, and then after 68 00:03:54,840 --> 00:03:58,080 Speaker 4: I would read chapters, I would tell my wife Ashley 69 00:03:58,240 --> 00:04:01,840 Speaker 4: about what I just read and she's now doing, and 70 00:04:01,960 --> 00:04:04,560 Speaker 4: then she ultimately she read it after I was finished. 71 00:04:05,120 --> 00:04:08,720 Speaker 4: And now we're doing the opposite. She's reading this one 72 00:04:08,920 --> 00:04:12,480 Speaker 4: and telling me about what she read, and then I'll 73 00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:13,840 Speaker 4: read it after she's finished. 74 00:04:15,760 --> 00:04:18,680 Speaker 2: What does she said? What is Ashley said? If she 75 00:04:18,720 --> 00:04:20,680 Speaker 2: said any of the details yet? 76 00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:25,800 Speaker 4: Yes? Some, Yeah, she's she shared some and she what's 77 00:04:25,839 --> 00:04:28,400 Speaker 4: interesting is the very first thing she said to me 78 00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:32,800 Speaker 4: was what you said to me? And that was this 79 00:04:32,839 --> 00:04:37,280 Speaker 4: book is very conversational. Yeah, it's written very conversationd like, 80 00:04:37,640 --> 00:04:42,160 Speaker 4: because she'll bounce from from the pool to a Bible 81 00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:45,080 Speaker 4: study or a pool to going out to eat or something. 82 00:04:45,120 --> 00:04:47,159 Speaker 4: It's just back and forth. But it's like a conversation 83 00:04:47,279 --> 00:04:50,880 Speaker 4: would be, but much more structured. You can follow along, 84 00:04:50,920 --> 00:04:54,880 Speaker 4: you don't get lost. And that's one thing that Granger said. 85 00:04:55,040 --> 00:04:57,200 Speaker 4: I said, how is it? And he said, uh, it's 86 00:04:57,360 --> 00:05:00,400 Speaker 4: very it's very conversational and it's I I didn't tell 87 00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:04,000 Speaker 4: her about that, and she got the same synopsis from it. Yeah, 88 00:05:04,040 --> 00:05:08,600 Speaker 4: but she's a lot of things that I mean, we're 89 00:05:08,640 --> 00:05:12,080 Speaker 4: close that we still didn't know, you know, yeah, And 90 00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:14,200 Speaker 4: I think that that's the same. I mean I didn't 91 00:05:14,240 --> 00:05:16,680 Speaker 4: know of course, And it was like that with with 92 00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:20,520 Speaker 4: like a River as well, and it's it's interesting what 93 00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:24,640 Speaker 4: a book like this can do, not just for you personally, 94 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:28,360 Speaker 4: I assume amber, but also for those that you you 95 00:05:28,680 --> 00:05:32,960 Speaker 4: interact with, you know, daily, weekly, monthly, you know in 96 00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:37,280 Speaker 4: your life, of what how it will draw those in 97 00:05:37,400 --> 00:05:41,119 Speaker 4: and help put pieces together that that we don't often 98 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:42,000 Speaker 4: see about each other. 99 00:05:42,120 --> 00:05:46,120 Speaker 3: Yeah. I think when the editor told me to write 100 00:05:46,120 --> 00:05:47,839 Speaker 3: the book, and I've said this other places, she said, 101 00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:49,200 Speaker 3: I want you to be the u ees to you 102 00:05:49,279 --> 00:05:51,480 Speaker 3: that you can be. I think when people think about 103 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:53,120 Speaker 3: writing a book, and I even thought, this is like 104 00:05:53,200 --> 00:05:55,719 Speaker 3: I need to be more academic, I need to sound better, 105 00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:57,560 Speaker 3: and she said, I just want you to be yourself. 106 00:05:57,920 --> 00:06:00,000 Speaker 3: People already know your story, they already know your voice 107 00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:02,640 Speaker 3: through a rise. Don't change how you're talking to people. 108 00:06:03,360 --> 00:06:05,159 Speaker 3: And so that's kind of the feedback that I've gotten. 109 00:06:05,360 --> 00:06:07,760 Speaker 3: I think you said, it's like you're just like I'm 110 00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:10,039 Speaker 3: getting text messages from you and you're just talking to me. 111 00:06:11,160 --> 00:06:12,960 Speaker 3: And so I'm thankful that that's what it feels like 112 00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:14,719 Speaker 3: for people, is that I'm right there with you in 113 00:06:14,760 --> 00:06:15,400 Speaker 3: the room. 114 00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:19,479 Speaker 1: So this is as we speak today. This is literally 115 00:06:19,560 --> 00:06:24,960 Speaker 1: released day as we record this, and I've been kind 116 00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:27,120 Speaker 1: of prepping you like, hey, you know last even last night, 117 00:06:27,160 --> 00:06:30,320 Speaker 1: were like, hey, just in one more hour, the audiobook 118 00:06:30,360 --> 00:06:34,600 Speaker 1: will be live at ten or eleven pm Central Time. 119 00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:42,120 Speaker 1: The audiobook was live last night, and I just you're like, yeah, yeah, 120 00:06:42,640 --> 00:06:45,800 Speaker 1: my work is done. But I was prepping you because 121 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:50,400 Speaker 1: people will hear your story this week and they will 122 00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:55,840 Speaker 1: look at you differently, they'll think of you differently. And 123 00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:59,280 Speaker 1: I mean the book is could I read some of it? 124 00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:02,600 Speaker 2: I mean it starts in chapter one. 125 00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:04,520 Speaker 3: Buckle up. 126 00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:09,360 Speaker 1: It's like a buckle up type thing, like chapter one. 127 00:07:09,800 --> 00:07:12,320 Speaker 1: This is the first this is the first few lines. 128 00:07:13,960 --> 00:07:18,040 Speaker 1: I sifted through clots of deep red blood, searching for 129 00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:20,760 Speaker 1: anything that would resemble the baby I was miscarrying. 130 00:07:22,160 --> 00:07:22,720 Speaker 2: For hours. 131 00:07:22,760 --> 00:07:27,160 Speaker 1: I had lain sweating on the towel covered cement floor 132 00:07:27,240 --> 00:07:31,040 Speaker 1: of our bug infested barn in the August heat of Texas, 133 00:07:31,440 --> 00:07:33,880 Speaker 1: who had been living in an RV while our home 134 00:07:33,960 --> 00:07:36,240 Speaker 1: was being built, and we had no plumbing in the 135 00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:39,360 Speaker 1: fifth wheel, so my only place to go was the 136 00:07:39,360 --> 00:07:43,560 Speaker 1: one barn bathroom that we all shared. The only position 137 00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:45,720 Speaker 1: I can get comfortable in was on my hands and knees, 138 00:07:45,720 --> 00:07:48,160 Speaker 1: curled in a ball. The pain was more intense than 139 00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:51,520 Speaker 1: anything i'd ever felt, and I had transitioned from crying 140 00:07:51,520 --> 00:07:56,640 Speaker 1: to praying to oddly sleeping in between muscle contractions. That's 141 00:07:56,720 --> 00:07:59,320 Speaker 1: the first few sentences. 142 00:08:00,040 --> 00:08:02,400 Speaker 3: Well, and that came because I think I was going 143 00:08:02,480 --> 00:08:04,640 Speaker 3: to start at the pool. And when I talked to 144 00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:06,880 Speaker 3: you and Esther at that lunch that day, you said 145 00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:09,800 Speaker 3: you should start with the miscarriage. Yeah, because I was 146 00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:12,400 Speaker 3: completely in a different spot spiritually, and so that was 147 00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:14,080 Speaker 3: a good place to start and then go into the 148 00:08:14,080 --> 00:08:16,200 Speaker 3: story and then come back to the miscarriage in the middle. 149 00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:19,000 Speaker 3: But yeah, they said, a lot of the people at 150 00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:22,080 Speaker 3: the publishing company said when they first read that first sentence, 151 00:08:22,120 --> 00:08:27,160 Speaker 3: it was like, WHOA, you're not expecting Yeah, that graphic. 152 00:08:28,480 --> 00:08:28,920 Speaker 2: I wasn't. 153 00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:32,319 Speaker 1: Yeah, and you're right, I was involved in that idea 154 00:08:32,360 --> 00:08:34,920 Speaker 1: of like you should start with the miscarriage. But this 155 00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:37,719 Speaker 1: is an example of like, during this time I was 156 00:08:37,840 --> 00:08:41,120 Speaker 1: keeping the kids away from you. The kids knew you 157 00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:43,920 Speaker 1: were pregnant, and we didn't tell them about the miscarriage. 158 00:08:43,960 --> 00:08:46,120 Speaker 1: We just didn't want to break their heart. And so 159 00:08:47,600 --> 00:08:51,120 Speaker 1: but London was so intuitive, at what eight years old 160 00:08:51,520 --> 00:08:54,480 Speaker 1: or so, She's like, Mommy, everything okay, and You're like, 161 00:08:54,559 --> 00:08:55,959 Speaker 1: I'm just really tired. 162 00:08:56,080 --> 00:08:57,520 Speaker 3: Yeah, not feeling good. 163 00:08:57,840 --> 00:08:58,480 Speaker 2: Not feeling good. 164 00:08:58,679 --> 00:09:03,599 Speaker 1: Literally you'd been there in there for hours in the bathroom. 165 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:09,160 Speaker 1: Oh man, But there are other things and and where 166 00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:11,559 Speaker 1: where we when I was just talking about oh, I 167 00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:17,199 Speaker 1: was recording The Smiths and I I was telling you 168 00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:19,120 Speaker 1: probably my favorite part of the. 169 00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:25,400 Speaker 2: Book is that it was in the Idol. It is 170 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:26,000 Speaker 2: in the Idol. 171 00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:32,079 Speaker 1: Yeah, I turned right to it on the Smiths. 172 00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:33,679 Speaker 2: And now I'm not going to turn to it on 173 00:09:33,720 --> 00:09:34,920 Speaker 2: the podcast here. 174 00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:40,560 Speaker 1: It is so this part is crazy, And so people 175 00:09:41,559 --> 00:09:43,320 Speaker 1: that would want that would be looking for this book. 176 00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:47,640 Speaker 1: I mean, anyone could read this book. It's certainly relevant 177 00:09:47,679 --> 00:09:49,760 Speaker 1: to anyone that walks on planet Earth. 178 00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:52,079 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's not just about child loss. It's a lot 179 00:09:52,080 --> 00:09:54,439 Speaker 3: of different griefs and just basically like how your life 180 00:09:54,480 --> 00:09:55,840 Speaker 3: doesn't go like you thought it was going to go. 181 00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:56,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's good. 182 00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:59,920 Speaker 1: Like you if you think you're a candidate for someone 183 00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:02,040 Speaker 1: who their life may not go as you think it 184 00:10:02,080 --> 00:10:05,400 Speaker 1: should go. If that's you, if you're a candidate for that, 185 00:10:05,880 --> 00:10:10,240 Speaker 1: then this book would be good for you. But similar 186 00:10:10,280 --> 00:10:13,160 Speaker 1: to what I told people with like a River, because 187 00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:15,280 Speaker 1: sometimes people are like I don't want to read it. 188 00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:17,679 Speaker 1: I already know what happened. I don't want to relive that. 189 00:10:18,520 --> 00:10:22,360 Speaker 1: It's like, no, no, no, no, there's hope. I'm not 190 00:10:22,400 --> 00:10:24,400 Speaker 1: going to leave you without hope. In fact, ant Man 191 00:10:24,440 --> 00:10:26,000 Speaker 1: and I say that all the time on this podcast 192 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:28,120 Speaker 1: when we talk about Mark of the Beast or End 193 00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:30,480 Speaker 1: the Times, We're like, we don't want to ever leave 194 00:10:30,520 --> 00:10:32,560 Speaker 1: you on this podcast without hope. And that's what this 195 00:10:32,600 --> 00:10:35,760 Speaker 1: book does. But there's a turning point in here, and 196 00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:38,680 Speaker 1: it's a chapter called the Idol. And this might be 197 00:10:38,679 --> 00:10:43,040 Speaker 1: shocking to some people, but I remember you talking about this, 198 00:10:43,559 --> 00:10:48,079 Speaker 1: but I but when I read the book it then 199 00:10:48,120 --> 00:10:49,480 Speaker 1: it really hit me. 200 00:10:49,520 --> 00:10:50,480 Speaker 2: And then when I held. 201 00:10:50,280 --> 00:10:53,040 Speaker 1: Actually this hard copy I read a few weeks ago 202 00:10:53,080 --> 00:10:58,679 Speaker 1: on an airplane on one leg to South Gards, North Carolina. 203 00:10:58,840 --> 00:11:01,520 Speaker 1: I read half of it. On the back from South Carolina, Austin, 204 00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:03,720 Speaker 1: I read the second half, I was just like, couldn't stop. 205 00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:06,000 Speaker 1: I was even in the terminal walking to the terminal 206 00:11:06,040 --> 00:11:10,720 Speaker 1: holding it. But there's a section in here that says 207 00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:15,640 Speaker 1: you wrote one of the most shattering realizations in my 208 00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:18,400 Speaker 1: grief was about to unfold. And once again it happened 209 00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:22,880 Speaker 1: on my bathroom floor as I sat there crying utterly 210 00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:27,200 Speaker 1: consumed by sorrow. And this is page one point sixteen. 211 00:11:28,080 --> 00:11:31,240 Speaker 1: There is a lot of hard stuff that happens in 212 00:11:31,280 --> 00:11:35,000 Speaker 1: a hundred pages. Like you are seeking the Lord. You're crying, 213 00:11:35,120 --> 00:11:40,600 Speaker 1: You're grieving. The miscarriage happens, loss of riv happens. There's 214 00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:44,400 Speaker 1: just pain. So here we are, they say. As I 215 00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:48,240 Speaker 1: sat there crying, utterly consumed by sorrow, the Lord interrupted 216 00:11:48,280 --> 00:11:52,200 Speaker 1: my pain with three words that changed everything. They weren't audible, 217 00:11:52,600 --> 00:11:56,280 Speaker 1: but I felt every word crushing my spirit like a 218 00:11:56,320 --> 00:11:59,920 Speaker 1: carefully a careful heart surgeon, cutting through the fog of 219 00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,280 Speaker 1: my despair with piercing clarity. 220 00:12:03,880 --> 00:12:06,160 Speaker 2: Enough seek Me. 221 00:12:07,920 --> 00:12:09,960 Speaker 1: These weren't my own thoughts, and as crazy as it 222 00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:12,319 Speaker 1: may sound, they carried a weight that I can't fully explain. 223 00:12:12,600 --> 00:12:16,199 Speaker 1: In that moment, God revealed an uncomfortable truth. I had 224 00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:20,240 Speaker 1: made River an idol in my life. My pain, my 225 00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:23,679 Speaker 1: longing for him, my constant thoughts of him. They had 226 00:12:23,679 --> 00:12:26,680 Speaker 1: begun to eclipse the one who is the source of 227 00:12:26,760 --> 00:12:30,400 Speaker 1: all comfort and peace. Gently, but firmly, the Lord was 228 00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:33,480 Speaker 1: calling me to lift my eyes from my sadness and 229 00:12:33,559 --> 00:12:39,559 Speaker 1: refocus them on him. Enough seek Me. It was a conviction, 230 00:12:40,240 --> 00:12:43,440 Speaker 1: a call, and a challenge all at once. God was 231 00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:45,880 Speaker 1: calling me to get up to a rise off the 232 00:12:45,920 --> 00:12:49,240 Speaker 1: bathroom floor, both physically and spiritually. I felt in that 233 00:12:49,320 --> 00:12:53,280 Speaker 1: moment that everyone is suffering something. I felt that I 234 00:12:53,320 --> 00:12:57,960 Speaker 1: felt the spirit saying to me, enough, seek me, give 235 00:12:58,000 --> 00:12:59,199 Speaker 1: me the glory that belongs to. 236 00:12:59,160 --> 00:13:03,880 Speaker 4: Me alone, like whoa yeah. 237 00:13:03,920 --> 00:13:05,679 Speaker 1: And when you know, when I read that, and when 238 00:13:05,679 --> 00:13:09,920 Speaker 1: I read certain things like this, I often think that 239 00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:11,160 Speaker 1: sounds like my God. 240 00:13:12,240 --> 00:13:17,360 Speaker 4: How did it feel to have that clarity, have that moment? 241 00:13:17,600 --> 00:13:22,319 Speaker 3: It was the most powerful moment in my healing journey. 242 00:13:22,920 --> 00:13:25,079 Speaker 3: Was and you know, and you hear, you can hear 243 00:13:25,120 --> 00:13:27,480 Speaker 3: that and think, well, that sounds mean? Why would God? 244 00:13:27,880 --> 00:13:29,800 Speaker 3: You know, you're crying over your son, who wouldn't cry? 245 00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:33,000 Speaker 3: But it wasn't mean. It was firm and loving. And 246 00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:35,120 Speaker 3: I told Greendeer it was like a father like lifting 247 00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:38,839 Speaker 3: his daughter's face, like enough, look at me. And I 248 00:13:39,080 --> 00:13:41,320 Speaker 3: realized that I had been seeking the gift I had 249 00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:43,679 Speaker 3: been seeking. I long to be with Rivers so much. 250 00:13:43,679 --> 00:13:46,200 Speaker 3: I was so sad, But I was not looking to 251 00:13:46,280 --> 00:13:48,480 Speaker 3: the Lord. I mean I was in a sense, but 252 00:13:48,520 --> 00:13:51,240 Speaker 3: not really. I hadn't read my Bible. I was reading devotions. 253 00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:53,560 Speaker 3: I was getting little pieces, but I wasn't looking to 254 00:13:53,720 --> 00:13:56,080 Speaker 3: my savior. I was stuck in my sadness and in 255 00:13:56,120 --> 00:13:58,559 Speaker 3: my sorrow. And that was the moment that the Lord 256 00:13:58,640 --> 00:14:00,640 Speaker 3: called me to arise. That's kind at the beginning of 257 00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:03,679 Speaker 3: how Arise with the Amberg got started, And it was 258 00:14:03,720 --> 00:14:07,920 Speaker 3: the beginning of us really looking to the scriptures and 259 00:14:07,960 --> 00:14:11,040 Speaker 3: seeking who God truly was. Who is this God that 260 00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:13,040 Speaker 3: is telling me enough? Look at me? 261 00:14:13,679 --> 00:14:17,880 Speaker 4: Well, it's something I think that you learn as a 262 00:14:17,880 --> 00:14:20,520 Speaker 4: as a parent. Is that, like you said, it was 263 00:14:20,520 --> 00:14:23,000 Speaker 4: like a father lifting up his daughter's face. Is that 264 00:14:23,080 --> 00:14:25,880 Speaker 4: only as a parent can you go You can only 265 00:14:25,880 --> 00:14:28,360 Speaker 4: see what you're currently in. Yes, and I can see everything. 266 00:14:29,400 --> 00:14:30,880 Speaker 4: So I'm gonna let you do this for a minute 267 00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:33,800 Speaker 4: so you can feel it and then it's over. It's done. 268 00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:34,440 Speaker 4: It's enough. 269 00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:37,280 Speaker 3: Yeah. And it's encouraging and challenging. And you know GRANGERD 270 00:14:37,280 --> 00:14:40,080 Speaker 3: does that with our kids. Yeah, it's like it's a push. 271 00:14:40,320 --> 00:14:41,280 Speaker 3: It's like you can do this. 272 00:14:42,120 --> 00:14:42,800 Speaker 4: The encouragement. 273 00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:46,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, I think there was something you said that's really 274 00:14:46,160 --> 00:14:50,880 Speaker 1: important because it wasn't that you weren't seeking him at all. 275 00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:52,680 Speaker 1: And so I don't want people to hear this and 276 00:14:52,720 --> 00:14:57,600 Speaker 1: go I am thinking God, I am. 277 00:14:56,880 --> 00:14:59,960 Speaker 2: And it's not that you weren't. It's that you weren't. 278 00:15:00,280 --> 00:15:03,880 Speaker 2: You were seeking him to comfort you for River. 279 00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:07,040 Speaker 3: I wasn't seeking him for who he was and not. 280 00:15:06,920 --> 00:15:11,080 Speaker 1: For who he was. That's there's a big difference. And 281 00:15:11,200 --> 00:15:14,280 Speaker 1: you know, God allows us to seek him for comfort 282 00:15:14,360 --> 00:15:18,400 Speaker 1: for other things to a point, because that's how it begins. 283 00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:20,960 Speaker 1: You know a lot of that, that's kindergarten theology. It 284 00:15:21,080 --> 00:15:25,360 Speaker 1: starts there but to but eventually he says, stop, it's 285 00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:30,560 Speaker 1: time to graduate kindergarten. Look to me. And yeah, So 286 00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:32,160 Speaker 1: you and I talked about on the on the Smiths 287 00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:34,640 Speaker 1: and we talked about the you know, the misconceptions of 288 00:15:34,680 --> 00:15:37,600 Speaker 1: the narcissistic God. Yeah, you know in this instance, like 289 00:15:37,640 --> 00:15:39,480 Speaker 1: seek me, I want to be more important than River. 290 00:15:39,560 --> 00:15:42,760 Speaker 2: It's not, it's not the point of this. It was. 291 00:15:44,240 --> 00:15:48,600 Speaker 1: Seek the gift, giver over the gift, and the joy 292 00:15:48,680 --> 00:15:53,960 Speaker 1: that you have will then eclipse the grief to hold you. 293 00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:58,560 Speaker 1: So that's a selfless desire of the Lord to want 294 00:15:58,560 --> 00:16:00,440 Speaker 1: you to seek him. It was from my good, it 295 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:03,120 Speaker 1: was for your good. Yeah, because he doesn't need anything. 296 00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:07,680 Speaker 1: He doesn't he doesn't need you to seek him to 297 00:16:07,680 --> 00:16:10,480 Speaker 1: make him feel better about himself. He needs you to 298 00:16:10,480 --> 00:16:13,520 Speaker 1: seek him so that it's so that you could finally 299 00:16:13,560 --> 00:16:15,280 Speaker 1: be healed because. 300 00:16:15,040 --> 00:16:15,640 Speaker 2: Of who he is. 301 00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:19,240 Speaker 1: That that is a that's a massive understanding that you 302 00:16:19,280 --> 00:16:21,720 Speaker 1: had to go through. And when I read that, I 303 00:16:21,800 --> 00:16:23,280 Speaker 1: mean not like I said, I remember you talking about it. 304 00:16:23,320 --> 00:16:25,440 Speaker 1: When I read it, I was like, whoa man I've 305 00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:28,800 Speaker 1: I've also and I know ant man has two felt 306 00:16:28,840 --> 00:16:32,200 Speaker 1: moments where the Lord's like, Okay, yep, enough, yep. 307 00:16:32,320 --> 00:16:34,360 Speaker 3: I mean he does it in scripture, he does it 308 00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:36,640 Speaker 3: all right, let's go. 309 00:16:39,760 --> 00:16:42,320 Speaker 1: So, you know, when I started this podcast, it seemed 310 00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:44,240 Speaker 1: like I had a lot to figure out on my own, 311 00:16:44,360 --> 00:16:47,280 Speaker 1: you know, the scripts, the setups, the filming, the schedule, 312 00:16:47,400 --> 00:16:51,280 Speaker 1: the logos, everything was overwhelming, and I just wanted to. 313 00:16:51,320 --> 00:16:52,840 Speaker 2: Take care of the creative side of it. 314 00:16:53,200 --> 00:16:55,200 Speaker 1: You know, whenever you're starting off something new, it seems 315 00:16:55,240 --> 00:16:57,600 Speaker 1: like your to do list just keeps growing every day 316 00:16:57,600 --> 00:17:00,240 Speaker 1: with new task, and the list that could just begin 317 00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:03,800 Speaker 1: to overrun your life. Finding the right tool that not 318 00:17:03,840 --> 00:17:06,520 Speaker 1: only helps you out but simplifies everything could be such 319 00:17:06,520 --> 00:17:10,120 Speaker 1: a game changer. And for millions of businesses, that tool 320 00:17:10,240 --> 00:17:14,480 Speaker 1: is Shopify. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of companies, 321 00:17:14,760 --> 00:17:19,119 Speaker 1: including EEE Apparel and many many other household names. If 322 00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:21,400 Speaker 1: you want to get started with your design studio, they 323 00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:23,960 Speaker 1: got hundreds of ready to use templates. They help you 324 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:27,439 Speaker 1: build beautiful online stores to match your brand style. You 325 00:17:27,440 --> 00:17:31,320 Speaker 1: could accelerate your content creation. It's packed with helpful AI 326 00:17:31,440 --> 00:17:35,400 Speaker 1: tools that help product descriptions and page headlines and even 327 00:17:35,480 --> 00:17:39,199 Speaker 1: enhance your product photography. Shopify does all this. You can 328 00:17:39,240 --> 00:17:41,120 Speaker 1: get the word out like you get this huge marketing 329 00:17:41,119 --> 00:17:44,040 Speaker 1: team behind you. You can create email and social media 330 00:17:44,080 --> 00:17:48,240 Speaker 1: campaigns wherever your customers are, wherever they're scrolling or strolling. 331 00:17:48,520 --> 00:17:52,080 Speaker 1: Best yet, Shopify is your commerce expert with world class 332 00:17:52,119 --> 00:17:55,760 Speaker 1: expertise and everything from managing inventory, to international shipping, to 333 00:17:55,800 --> 00:17:58,639 Speaker 1: processing returns and all that kind of stuff. If you 334 00:17:58,680 --> 00:18:01,919 Speaker 1: are ready to sell, you're ready for Shopify. Turn your 335 00:18:01,920 --> 00:18:05,960 Speaker 1: big business idea into with Shopify on your side. Sign 336 00:18:06,040 --> 00:18:08,119 Speaker 1: up for your one dollar per month trial and start 337 00:18:08,119 --> 00:18:11,000 Speaker 1: selling today at shopify dot com slash granger. Go to 338 00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:15,240 Speaker 1: shopify dot com slash granger shopify dot com slash granger. 339 00:18:16,840 --> 00:18:18,320 Speaker 1: If you're trying to get a gift for someone that 340 00:18:18,400 --> 00:18:21,640 Speaker 1: you think has everything, how about a special video message 341 00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:24,280 Speaker 1: from me. It's easy to do go to cameo dot 342 00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:26,800 Speaker 1: com slash granger Smith and you put in the prompt 343 00:18:26,880 --> 00:18:28,919 Speaker 1: what you want me to say. I get that message 344 00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:32,280 Speaker 1: on my phone. I'll say happy birthday, happy anniversary, whatever 345 00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:34,520 Speaker 1: personalized message you want me to say to whoever you 346 00:18:34,520 --> 00:18:36,480 Speaker 1: want me to say it to. I send it to 347 00:18:36,560 --> 00:18:38,760 Speaker 1: you and you give it to them. It's pretty cool. 348 00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:44,320 Speaker 1: Go to cameo dot com slash granger Smith. So the 349 00:18:44,680 --> 00:18:47,919 Speaker 1: next part that I brought. 350 00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:49,800 Speaker 2: Up before is. 351 00:18:52,720 --> 00:18:53,880 Speaker 4: I love it. 352 00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:55,960 Speaker 1: Is that the Recipient. Yeah, that's another It's a chapter 353 00:18:56,000 --> 00:19:00,440 Speaker 1: called the Recipient. And I shouldn't like have my own 354 00:19:00,520 --> 00:19:02,240 Speaker 1: copy of this so I could like mark it up. 355 00:19:02,280 --> 00:19:05,159 Speaker 1: I actually think I did mark up one of them. 356 00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:12,400 Speaker 2: But this part is. 357 00:19:13,800 --> 00:19:15,640 Speaker 1: Was crushing to me. This is one of these parts. 358 00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:21,440 Speaker 1: One of the things I didn't know you We donated 359 00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:27,200 Speaker 1: rivers organs, specifically two kidneys, right, and. 360 00:19:29,200 --> 00:19:31,320 Speaker 2: I was so out of this process. 361 00:19:31,840 --> 00:19:35,680 Speaker 1: It was your idea to donate, you know, by God's grace, 362 00:19:36,560 --> 00:19:39,320 Speaker 1: and it was your idea to move forward with all 363 00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:45,440 Speaker 1: the things, including you wrote letters to the two recipients. 364 00:19:46,160 --> 00:19:50,520 Speaker 1: You found out that you found out and you said 365 00:19:50,560 --> 00:19:53,680 Speaker 1: you were shocked to see that the kidneys of River 366 00:19:53,880 --> 00:19:56,280 Speaker 1: went to a forty nine year old woman and a 367 00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:57,720 Speaker 1: fifty three year old man. 368 00:19:58,880 --> 00:20:01,000 Speaker 3: I thought for sure they would have gone to children 369 00:20:01,080 --> 00:20:02,320 Speaker 3: because it was so tiny. 370 00:20:03,040 --> 00:20:06,359 Speaker 1: So once again here's us trying to decide what God's 371 00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:10,040 Speaker 1: going to do to my box. Oh it'll be a kid, 372 00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:12,840 Speaker 1: you know that. And and we'll return to that family, 373 00:20:12,880 --> 00:20:15,479 Speaker 1: the child, the little boy that they thought they were 374 00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:18,560 Speaker 1: going to lose. Well, that's not what happened. So you 375 00:20:18,600 --> 00:20:20,679 Speaker 1: get that, You get the notice that if this is 376 00:20:20,680 --> 00:20:22,800 Speaker 1: a forty nine year old woman gets one and a 377 00:20:22,840 --> 00:20:24,760 Speaker 1: fifty year old man, fifty three year old then gets 378 00:20:24,760 --> 00:20:28,720 Speaker 1: the other. He wrote them letters telling them all about 379 00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:32,640 Speaker 1: river right, and the whole story. His beautiful red hair, 380 00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:34,359 Speaker 1: you say, his deep brown eyes, the way that his 381 00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,560 Speaker 1: face would light up when he saw a dinosaur or 382 00:20:36,600 --> 00:20:39,600 Speaker 1: a tractor, How he loved being outside and digging in 383 00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:39,960 Speaker 1: the dirt. 384 00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:41,720 Speaker 2: He was so full of joy in life. 385 00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:44,480 Speaker 1: You told him about the difficult decision we made and 386 00:20:44,520 --> 00:20:46,359 Speaker 1: how we prayed over it, and I told him that 387 00:20:46,400 --> 00:20:49,439 Speaker 1: we had been praying for them, and that our hope 388 00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:52,200 Speaker 1: was that they were be joyful and healthy and thriving. 389 00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:54,680 Speaker 1: And then you left the door open, and that let 390 00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:56,480 Speaker 1: them know that you'd love to meet him one day 391 00:20:57,640 --> 00:20:58,320 Speaker 1: and then nothing. 392 00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:00,800 Speaker 3: Think it was four months. 393 00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:04,720 Speaker 1: For four months, you received one card in the mail. 394 00:21:06,440 --> 00:21:10,040 Speaker 1: It was the recipient of Rivers Right Kidney and the 395 00:21:10,080 --> 00:21:15,800 Speaker 1: card read, my name is Elda. I'm forty nine years old, married, 396 00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:19,159 Speaker 1: have one son. Since I was fourteen, I have suffered 397 00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:27,119 Speaker 1: a painful illness called polypsychic psychicistic palsystic kidney disease. Thanks 398 00:21:27,160 --> 00:21:30,600 Speaker 1: to you, I have a second chance at life. Words 399 00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:32,720 Speaker 1: can'tnot describe how thankful I am, my family and I 400 00:21:32,720 --> 00:21:35,000 Speaker 1: will be forever in your debt. I'm so grateful for 401 00:21:35,040 --> 00:21:36,679 Speaker 1: the new life you and your family have given me. 402 00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:39,960 Speaker 1: I wish you and your family along and prosperous life. Sincerely, Elda. 403 00:21:42,680 --> 00:21:46,199 Speaker 3: It's like that's it, I know, and it was. It 404 00:21:46,240 --> 00:21:49,080 Speaker 3: fit into a greeting card, and I think I wanted 405 00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:53,159 Speaker 3: in my selfishness, I wanted like pages of gratitude. But 406 00:21:53,240 --> 00:21:55,480 Speaker 3: then you know, I had to be reminded that was 407 00:21:55,520 --> 00:21:58,359 Speaker 3: probably really hard for her to write once she was 408 00:21:58,400 --> 00:22:02,840 Speaker 3: Spanish speaking too. How do you ever say thank you 409 00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:05,440 Speaker 3: for that? For you know, she knew we lost our son, 410 00:22:05,480 --> 00:22:07,800 Speaker 3: and I think I was just expecting something that you 411 00:22:07,840 --> 00:22:10,040 Speaker 3: can't expect in that moment, so I write in the book, 412 00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:15,080 Speaker 3: don't have expectations and understand what they're going through too. 413 00:22:15,160 --> 00:22:16,720 Speaker 3: That's got to be really hard for them, And I'm 414 00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:19,840 Speaker 3: so grateful. She even responded, so. 415 00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:24,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, but you said your tears came, your emotions hit sadness, 416 00:22:24,440 --> 00:22:28,879 Speaker 1: maybe even a little selfish sadness. You didn't know what 417 00:22:28,920 --> 00:22:31,680 Speaker 1: you were expecting. But somehow you wanted more from her. 418 00:22:31,720 --> 00:22:34,680 Speaker 1: You wanted more from that letter. You craved a deeper connection, 419 00:22:34,840 --> 00:22:38,720 Speaker 1: something that would ease the ache in your heart. But 420 00:22:38,840 --> 00:22:40,960 Speaker 1: you sat there and you realized that it must have 421 00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:42,359 Speaker 1: taken a lot for Elder to write it. So then 422 00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:46,280 Speaker 1: you met. This is the part I didn't know. So 423 00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:48,600 Speaker 1: as I read these words, like you know, these are 424 00:22:50,480 --> 00:22:52,320 Speaker 1: these are just new. It was a new story to me. 425 00:22:53,160 --> 00:22:55,040 Speaker 1: Once again, I knew that you did it, but I 426 00:22:55,080 --> 00:22:57,520 Speaker 1: didn't know the details. I'll try to read it again. 427 00:22:57,680 --> 00:23:00,120 Speaker 1: Oh I I did on the Smiths, but you say 428 00:23:00,400 --> 00:23:03,760 Speaker 1: page two to one. We finally met on November eleventh, 429 00:23:04,080 --> 00:23:07,639 Speaker 1: twenty twenty two. I chose a local coffee shop and 430 00:23:07,680 --> 00:23:10,800 Speaker 1: we found a quiet table in the back. Maverick, who 431 00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:12,479 Speaker 1: was just over a year at the time, came with 432 00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:15,080 Speaker 1: me and Elder brought her sister to help translate because 433 00:23:15,080 --> 00:23:19,199 Speaker 1: she mostly spoke Spanish. She was absolutely precious, standing just 434 00:23:19,240 --> 00:23:22,119 Speaker 1: over four feet tall, with short, highlighted brown hair and 435 00:23:22,200 --> 00:23:25,800 Speaker 1: warm brown eyes behind her glasses. She wore a lovely 436 00:23:25,880 --> 00:23:29,600 Speaker 1: floral paisley top with black pants and a cozy black sweater. 437 00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:32,919 Speaker 1: As we sipped our drinks, she shared her story that 438 00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:36,440 Speaker 1: she had been on dialysis for three long years before 439 00:23:36,480 --> 00:23:39,880 Speaker 1: receiving River's kidney, tethered to a machine for eight to 440 00:23:39,920 --> 00:23:44,880 Speaker 1: ten hours every single day. Wow, three years, You're right 441 00:23:45,480 --> 00:23:49,159 Speaker 1: for Rivers. Entire lifetime, she had been fighting this battle, 442 00:23:49,320 --> 00:23:57,359 Speaker 1: hooked to a machine, waiting, praying, hoping, longing for healing. 443 00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:04,840 Speaker 1: It's interesting you think back to enough seek me. It 444 00:24:04,960 --> 00:24:07,840 Speaker 1: struck me how we didn't always see what the Lord 445 00:24:07,920 --> 00:24:09,720 Speaker 1: is doing. We don't always see what the Lord is doing. 446 00:24:10,680 --> 00:24:12,879 Speaker 1: How often she must have wondered, do you see me? 447 00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:16,000 Speaker 3: Lord? 448 00:24:16,040 --> 00:24:19,199 Speaker 1: Why are you allowing me to suffer like this? And 449 00:24:19,320 --> 00:24:22,360 Speaker 1: yet in his kindness I can almost hear him whispering, 450 00:24:24,119 --> 00:24:31,560 Speaker 1: Hold on, child, I'm preparing something for you. I'm raising 451 00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:34,840 Speaker 1: up a little boy, and man, you want to read 452 00:24:34,840 --> 00:24:40,120 Speaker 1: this very I'm raising up a little boy who will 453 00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:45,560 Speaker 1: help heal you just hold on and then and then 454 00:24:45,560 --> 00:24:47,840 Speaker 1: the part that gets me is the next part. The 455 00:24:47,920 --> 00:24:49,920 Speaker 1: part that really gets me is the next part. You say, 456 00:24:50,560 --> 00:25:01,000 Speaker 1: I have a picture of her, so he's here on 457 00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:03,119 Speaker 1: the smith for some reason. You say, I have a 458 00:25:03,119 --> 00:25:07,879 Speaker 1: picture for holding Maverick that day, And it makes me 459 00:25:07,920 --> 00:25:09,800 Speaker 1: emotional every time I look at it, because this is 460 00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:13,560 Speaker 1: the closest Maverick has ever been to a piece of 461 00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:19,280 Speaker 1: his big brother, Eldon Maverick. Two blessings that came out 462 00:25:19,320 --> 00:25:22,239 Speaker 1: of the breaking of my heart, two lives I will 463 00:25:22,359 --> 00:25:31,760 Speaker 1: cherish forever. That's beautiful. Your words are so beautiful and 464 00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:40,919 Speaker 1: so powerful for people to see. The circle of sovereignty 465 00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:44,600 Speaker 1: is God. We don't often see. I would say it 466 00:25:44,640 --> 00:25:47,119 Speaker 1: might even be rare that we would see a breaking 467 00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:50,479 Speaker 1: of a heart, the Lord breaking a heart and then 468 00:25:51,080 --> 00:25:56,240 Speaker 1: redeeming it, for that's visibly seen by us. Sometimes he 469 00:25:56,320 --> 00:26:00,440 Speaker 1: does it for reasons that we don't know, and other 470 00:26:00,480 --> 00:26:04,080 Speaker 1: times he lets he lets you see a little bit 471 00:26:04,119 --> 00:26:06,399 Speaker 1: of it. I mean, there's a what does Piper say, 472 00:26:06,480 --> 00:26:08,879 Speaker 1: There's ten thousand things God is doing at all. 473 00:26:08,760 --> 00:26:10,520 Speaker 3: Times in your life, and you're aware of about three 474 00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:10,760 Speaker 3: of them. 475 00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:12,480 Speaker 2: You're aware of about three of them, and. 476 00:26:12,520 --> 00:26:16,960 Speaker 3: There's another's Yeah, there's a Scottish pastor, Samuel Rutherford, and 477 00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:19,760 Speaker 3: he says, God is I'm probably I'm paraphrasing. God is 478 00:26:19,840 --> 00:26:23,479 Speaker 3: too skilled and wise as a physician to hurt you 479 00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:26,080 Speaker 3: for nothing. He can use your very wounds to heal you. 480 00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:30,240 Speaker 3: And like you said, oftentimes we don't we won't see 481 00:26:30,359 --> 00:26:32,720 Speaker 3: all of the intertwining lives that that and all the 482 00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:35,680 Speaker 3: things that God is doing. But it's just a realization 483 00:26:35,720 --> 00:26:37,719 Speaker 3: it's not about me, it's not about my suffering. It's 484 00:26:37,760 --> 00:26:40,720 Speaker 3: not just about me and River like now she gets 485 00:26:40,760 --> 00:26:43,600 Speaker 3: to have life and that she's just one of the 486 00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:46,679 Speaker 3: blessings from the breaking. So many other domino effects have 487 00:26:46,720 --> 00:26:49,480 Speaker 3: happened from the loss of our son, and we know 488 00:26:49,520 --> 00:26:51,080 Speaker 3: it's not River that did it. It's not us in 489 00:26:51,160 --> 00:26:53,200 Speaker 3: anything that we have done. It's all in what God 490 00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:55,840 Speaker 3: is doing. So it really just took a shift in 491 00:26:55,920 --> 00:26:59,080 Speaker 3: my perspective of not looking at the earthly things, the 492 00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:01,040 Speaker 3: things that are passing away, and really turning my eyes 493 00:27:01,040 --> 00:27:04,480 Speaker 3: to the eternal. And that took work and it was hard. Yeah, 494 00:27:04,240 --> 00:27:07,040 Speaker 3: But when you can see that there's freedom in that, 495 00:27:07,080 --> 00:27:08,760 Speaker 3: and there's peace in that, and there's hope in that 496 00:27:08,840 --> 00:27:09,800 Speaker 3: and there's joy in that. 497 00:27:10,440 --> 00:27:14,399 Speaker 2: Yeah, you said blessing in the breaking. I've heard you 498 00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:16,320 Speaker 2: say that before. It's that's good. 499 00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:19,040 Speaker 1: That's another one of the titles I would have rejected, though, 500 00:27:19,040 --> 00:27:20,680 Speaker 1: because the girl in the bathroom floor is better. 501 00:27:21,040 --> 00:27:23,399 Speaker 3: Well, I think about Jesus. I mean, the greatest blessing 502 00:27:23,440 --> 00:27:25,879 Speaker 3: of our lives came in the breaking of his body 503 00:27:26,280 --> 00:27:26,680 Speaker 3: or us. 504 00:27:28,200 --> 00:27:31,639 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's the pinnacle. The pinnacle of suffering is in 505 00:27:32,359 --> 00:27:38,199 Speaker 1: the and the beauty from suffering is is that? You 506 00:27:38,200 --> 00:27:41,120 Speaker 1: know we were talking yesterday. I think well, I think 507 00:27:41,160 --> 00:27:46,119 Speaker 1: it was yesterday about the Book of Acts and the 508 00:27:46,200 --> 00:27:48,719 Speaker 1: story of Paul. I'll go there right now. I think 509 00:27:48,760 --> 00:27:55,119 Speaker 1: it's Acts nine. But the story of Saul to Paul, 510 00:27:56,640 --> 00:28:01,040 Speaker 1: it's he is converted by the Lord from a persecutor 511 00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:05,439 Speaker 1: of the church, a murderer of the church, a murderer 512 00:28:05,480 --> 00:28:07,760 Speaker 1: of Christians. And then he's radically on the road to 513 00:28:07,800 --> 00:28:14,600 Speaker 1: Damascus transformed. And he is blinded by the Lord Jesus 514 00:28:14,600 --> 00:28:18,760 Speaker 1: on the road to Damascus, and he hears a voice 515 00:28:18,800 --> 00:28:21,159 Speaker 1: saying to him, Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting me? 516 00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:23,080 Speaker 1: And he says, who are you? 517 00:28:23,119 --> 00:28:23,359 Speaker 4: Lord? 518 00:28:23,400 --> 00:28:26,560 Speaker 1: And he said, I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting. 519 00:28:27,119 --> 00:28:28,920 Speaker 1: Rise and enter the city, and you will be told 520 00:28:28,960 --> 00:28:32,760 Speaker 1: what you are to do. Okay, So other men fell 521 00:28:32,800 --> 00:28:36,080 Speaker 1: to the ground. They didn't know. Everyone's trying to figure 522 00:28:36,080 --> 00:28:41,040 Speaker 1: out what's going on. He goes to Damascus in obedience 523 00:28:41,080 --> 00:28:43,880 Speaker 1: to what Jesus said, and then verse ten. Now there 524 00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:46,840 Speaker 1: was a disciple in Damascus named Anonius. The Lord said 525 00:28:46,840 --> 00:28:49,040 Speaker 1: to him in a vision. Anonius, he said, here, I 526 00:28:49,080 --> 00:28:51,520 Speaker 1: am Lord. And he said to him, rise and go 527 00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:54,400 Speaker 1: to the street called Straight, and at the house of Judas, 528 00:28:54,800 --> 00:28:58,360 Speaker 1: look for a man of Tarsus named Saul. For behold, 529 00:28:58,400 --> 00:29:01,200 Speaker 1: he is praying, and he is seen a vision of 530 00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:05,520 Speaker 1: a man named Anonius. And lay his and come in 531 00:29:05,640 --> 00:29:07,720 Speaker 1: and lay his hands on him, so that he might 532 00:29:07,800 --> 00:29:11,520 Speaker 1: regain his sight. But Anonius, he knows, he knows about 533 00:29:11,520 --> 00:29:17,480 Speaker 1: this guy. He knows about this ceasis. Lord, I have 534 00:29:17,600 --> 00:29:20,760 Speaker 1: heard from many about this man, how much evil he 535 00:29:20,840 --> 00:29:22,680 Speaker 1: has done to your saints at Jerusalem. 536 00:29:23,400 --> 00:29:24,240 Speaker 2: And here he has. 537 00:29:24,160 --> 00:29:27,800 Speaker 1: Authority from the chief priest to bind all who call 538 00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:30,360 Speaker 1: in your name. But here it is, but the Lord 539 00:29:30,400 --> 00:29:33,160 Speaker 1: said to him, go, for he has a chosen instrument 540 00:29:33,160 --> 00:29:35,560 Speaker 1: of mine to carry out my name before the gentiles 541 00:29:35,560 --> 00:29:38,520 Speaker 1: and the kings of the children of Israel, for I 542 00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:41,760 Speaker 1: will show him how much he must suffer for this 543 00:29:41,880 --> 00:29:48,680 Speaker 1: sake of my name. From the moment Saul Paul was 544 00:29:48,760 --> 00:29:54,840 Speaker 1: converted and called into the ministry of taking the message 545 00:29:54,840 --> 00:29:58,280 Speaker 1: of the Gospel to the Gentiles. He was also called 546 00:29:58,360 --> 00:30:04,760 Speaker 1: into suffering for the aim of Christ. Do we think 547 00:30:05,080 --> 00:30:08,560 Speaker 1: we would be any different as Christians, that we would 548 00:30:08,600 --> 00:30:11,920 Speaker 1: somehow make it through, make it through a life of 549 00:30:12,240 --> 00:30:12,960 Speaker 1: no suffering. 550 00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:18,080 Speaker 3: Not if we're to be like Jesus. No, he suffered, 551 00:30:18,080 --> 00:30:23,600 Speaker 3: we are to suffer with him. It's a blessing to 552 00:30:23,720 --> 00:30:27,520 Speaker 3: be called suffer with him. Yeah, it's hard to come 553 00:30:27,560 --> 00:30:28,520 Speaker 3: to the realization too. 554 00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:35,520 Speaker 1: So does that just mean that you are persecuted as 555 00:30:35,560 --> 00:30:41,120 Speaker 1: a Christian and maybe even martyred or killed or mocked 556 00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:42,960 Speaker 1: or does that mean other things too? 557 00:30:43,440 --> 00:30:44,960 Speaker 3: I think that's one of the ways, But I think 558 00:30:44,960 --> 00:30:47,880 Speaker 3: it includes all types of suffering. Yeah, that's fallen world. 559 00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:51,120 Speaker 3: We wouldn't have a need of a savior if none 560 00:30:51,120 --> 00:30:53,200 Speaker 3: of us have, if none of us suffered, we wouldn't 561 00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:55,880 Speaker 3: have a need for the Lord, if none of us 562 00:30:55,880 --> 00:30:59,400 Speaker 3: went through hard seasons of pain. It's for our sanctification 563 00:31:00,240 --> 00:31:03,840 Speaker 3: so we can become more like Christ, his glory can 564 00:31:03,880 --> 00:31:05,760 Speaker 3: be revealed to us. 565 00:31:06,120 --> 00:31:08,360 Speaker 1: So part of putting out a book like this is 566 00:31:08,800 --> 00:31:12,120 Speaker 1: also you coming into the awareness that you're going to 567 00:31:12,160 --> 00:31:15,120 Speaker 1: stir up the ant bed, and you're going to stir 568 00:31:15,240 --> 00:31:19,080 Speaker 1: up the roaches are going to start coming out. It's 569 00:31:19,160 --> 00:31:22,320 Speaker 1: easy ches more than a yes, sorry, I actually corrected 570 00:31:22,320 --> 00:31:27,680 Speaker 1: it when I thought like, no, not amen, when it. 571 00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:29,160 Speaker 2: Would be easy. 572 00:31:29,440 --> 00:31:33,080 Speaker 1: Speaking of persecution, it's easy just to go I'm going 573 00:31:33,160 --> 00:31:38,440 Speaker 1: to just hide forever. It's as long as I'm just 574 00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:42,600 Speaker 1: hiding and not talking and not saying anything, I'm a 575 00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:45,120 Speaker 1: not going to offend anybody and be no one is 576 00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:48,440 Speaker 1: going to find a fault in what I'm doing, and 577 00:31:48,520 --> 00:31:49,360 Speaker 1: so it's much. 578 00:31:49,240 --> 00:31:50,520 Speaker 2: Easier just to disappear. 579 00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:53,160 Speaker 1: The opposite of that is saying I'm going to write 580 00:31:53,160 --> 00:31:55,920 Speaker 1: a book and go on some talk shows and a 581 00:31:55,920 --> 00:32:00,320 Speaker 1: bunch of podcasts and talk about the book about my 582 00:32:00,440 --> 00:32:06,080 Speaker 1: son dying in my backyard on my watch. So have 583 00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:11,640 Speaker 1: you felt that heavier this round or maybe you've expected it, 584 00:32:11,760 --> 00:32:13,000 Speaker 1: or what do you think? 585 00:32:14,360 --> 00:32:17,239 Speaker 3: I think I have expected it, because it seems to 586 00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:19,960 Speaker 3: be ever every time we go on socials and talk 587 00:32:19,960 --> 00:32:22,880 Speaker 3: about River or your book or anything that we're doing, 588 00:32:23,920 --> 00:32:26,360 Speaker 3: an anniversary or something people come out of the would 589 00:32:26,400 --> 00:32:28,200 Speaker 3: work again, and it gets all stirred back up again, 590 00:32:28,240 --> 00:32:31,719 Speaker 3: and people start saying very harsh, negative things. And that 591 00:32:31,800 --> 00:32:33,480 Speaker 3: wasn't my goal in writing this book was I'm going 592 00:32:33,520 --> 00:32:34,640 Speaker 3: to go into the world and go on all these 593 00:32:34,680 --> 00:32:37,920 Speaker 3: talk shows. My goal in writing this book was I 594 00:32:38,000 --> 00:32:40,240 Speaker 3: read so many books when I was grieving that helped me, 595 00:32:40,320 --> 00:32:42,520 Speaker 3: that gave me hope, that gave me light. I wanted 596 00:32:42,880 --> 00:32:45,240 Speaker 3: our book, this book to be one of those things 597 00:32:45,240 --> 00:32:48,440 Speaker 3: that would help somebody. I craved stories of other people 598 00:32:48,440 --> 00:32:50,240 Speaker 3: who had gone through suffering and they were still standing 599 00:32:50,240 --> 00:32:52,760 Speaker 3: and not only standing, but praising God through it. And 600 00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:55,920 Speaker 3: I wanted to be one of those tiny stories that 601 00:32:55,960 --> 00:32:58,360 Speaker 3: hopefully could be a light for someone else. But when 602 00:32:58,360 --> 00:33:01,000 Speaker 3: you do that, you have people that come out and 603 00:33:01,040 --> 00:33:03,440 Speaker 3: say really awful things about what you're doing. 604 00:33:03,520 --> 00:33:07,160 Speaker 4: Do you feel it stronger it being this being your 605 00:33:07,200 --> 00:33:10,000 Speaker 4: book or did you feel it stronger with the first 606 00:33:10,320 --> 00:33:11,400 Speaker 4: I think it was both. 607 00:33:11,520 --> 00:33:15,280 Speaker 3: It's been the same for both that we are profiting 608 00:33:15,320 --> 00:33:18,800 Speaker 3: off of our son's death and how despicable of a 609 00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:24,400 Speaker 3: human we are to make money on our son dying. Yeah, 610 00:33:24,720 --> 00:33:28,600 Speaker 3: no amount of money it is worth obviously the life 611 00:33:28,600 --> 00:33:30,120 Speaker 3: of our child, like you and I would give anything 612 00:33:30,160 --> 00:33:32,800 Speaker 3: to have our son back, you know. But now with 613 00:33:33,000 --> 00:33:34,720 Speaker 3: new eyes and with these blessings, and you know we 614 00:33:34,760 --> 00:33:36,600 Speaker 3: have Maverick and all that, we could never go back. 615 00:33:37,200 --> 00:33:39,360 Speaker 3: Just with our faith in Christ, we could never go back. 616 00:33:39,960 --> 00:33:43,120 Speaker 3: But no amount of money is worth that. And people 617 00:33:43,160 --> 00:33:45,840 Speaker 3: said that about the children's book that we wrote, and 618 00:33:45,880 --> 00:33:48,240 Speaker 3: I'm not making anything on that. That's for the that's 619 00:33:48,280 --> 00:33:50,560 Speaker 3: the donations to the River Kelly Fund. We're not making money. 620 00:33:50,560 --> 00:33:53,680 Speaker 3: It's not it's to help someone else for the glory 621 00:33:53,720 --> 00:33:55,920 Speaker 3: of God. It is to point people to Christ, because 622 00:33:55,960 --> 00:33:57,880 Speaker 3: that is where our only hope is found. That is 623 00:33:57,920 --> 00:33:59,720 Speaker 3: where our only light is found. That's the only reason 624 00:33:59,760 --> 00:34:02,920 Speaker 3: we're still standing today is that we have saving faith 625 00:34:02,920 --> 00:34:05,120 Speaker 3: in Christ, and He has led us through and carried 626 00:34:05,200 --> 00:34:07,560 Speaker 3: us through our darkest times. And we want to do 627 00:34:07,600 --> 00:34:10,680 Speaker 3: that for somebody else. But I can't be mad at 628 00:34:10,680 --> 00:34:13,280 Speaker 3: those people because they just don't know. They're just lost 629 00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:16,200 Speaker 3: and they're they're far from the Lord. And I've come 630 00:34:16,239 --> 00:34:18,919 Speaker 3: to realize I can't let my feelings get hurt about 631 00:34:18,960 --> 00:34:21,279 Speaker 3: that anymore. I have to pray for them. Yeah, the 632 00:34:21,320 --> 00:34:23,239 Speaker 3: Bible says pray for those who persecute. You pray for 633 00:34:23,280 --> 00:34:25,480 Speaker 3: your enemies, and I pray that the Lord would open 634 00:34:25,520 --> 00:34:27,000 Speaker 3: their eyes, and I pray that they never have to 635 00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:29,920 Speaker 3: go through anything like this, but if they do, I 636 00:34:29,920 --> 00:34:31,040 Speaker 3: pray that they're led to the Lord. 637 00:34:31,480 --> 00:34:34,239 Speaker 1: This is such a tool for you because you'll be 638 00:34:34,239 --> 00:34:36,600 Speaker 1: able to tell people from now on for the rest 639 00:34:36,640 --> 00:34:40,239 Speaker 1: of your life on Earth. When someone comes to you 640 00:34:40,280 --> 00:34:44,840 Speaker 1: and says they're suffering or they have something going on forever, 641 00:34:44,920 --> 00:34:47,560 Speaker 1: you could say, will you read Girl on the Bathroom 642 00:34:47,560 --> 00:34:51,080 Speaker 1: Floor and that's my backstory, and then we could talk. 643 00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:54,279 Speaker 1: And I've done that countless times with Like a River, 644 00:34:54,840 --> 00:35:00,440 Speaker 1: and I have on Apple you could go to books 645 00:35:00,960 --> 00:35:05,200 Speaker 1: the books app, and you could gift a audiobook. So 646 00:35:05,560 --> 00:35:09,520 Speaker 1: I've done this so many times. I said, what's your email? 647 00:35:09,840 --> 00:35:11,760 Speaker 1: Like somebody's like talking to me. I said, what's your email? 648 00:35:12,480 --> 00:35:15,240 Speaker 1: They tell me their email. I go to Apple Books, 649 00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:19,040 Speaker 1: I'll buy Like a River audio, gift it on their 650 00:35:19,080 --> 00:35:21,680 Speaker 1: email and I'll say, hey, check your inbox, I send 651 00:35:21,680 --> 00:35:25,080 Speaker 1: you something. All you do is press play. So then 652 00:35:25,440 --> 00:35:28,640 Speaker 1: I talked to the publisher HarperCollins recently when I was 653 00:35:28,680 --> 00:35:30,560 Speaker 1: with Amber, and I was like, yeah, you know, because 654 00:35:30,600 --> 00:35:32,960 Speaker 1: we're talking about how so many people love audiobooks. 655 00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:34,799 Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, I've bought Like a River so 656 00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:35,520 Speaker 2: many times. 657 00:35:36,560 --> 00:35:39,120 Speaker 1: Or they said Like a River sells really well on audio, 658 00:35:39,160 --> 00:35:40,640 Speaker 1: and I said it might because of me, because I 659 00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:43,279 Speaker 1: buy it all the time. And they said, you know, 660 00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:47,160 Speaker 1: we can give you a code. I was like, oh, man, 661 00:35:47,920 --> 00:35:52,120 Speaker 1: oh that sounds great. There is a limited amount. I 662 00:35:52,160 --> 00:35:55,200 Speaker 1: can't just give out infinite amounts of code, but there's 663 00:35:55,440 --> 00:35:58,560 Speaker 1: that they've maybe twenty five or so will give me 664 00:35:58,600 --> 00:35:59,200 Speaker 1: to give. 665 00:35:59,080 --> 00:36:02,080 Speaker 2: Away, like, which is helpful, awesome. 666 00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:07,680 Speaker 1: What any other negative comments besides you're making money on 667 00:36:07,719 --> 00:36:08,399 Speaker 1: the death of your child. 668 00:36:08,480 --> 00:36:12,800 Speaker 3: I mean, I see just stuff about how how awful 669 00:36:12,920 --> 00:36:16,600 Speaker 3: of parents that we are, that it's our fault, everything's 670 00:36:16,600 --> 00:36:19,759 Speaker 3: our fault. We murdered our son, we drowned our son, 671 00:36:20,680 --> 00:36:22,360 Speaker 3: that our other children should be taken away, that we 672 00:36:22,360 --> 00:36:24,680 Speaker 3: should be in jail, just all the same stuff. 673 00:36:26,040 --> 00:36:28,799 Speaker 1: When when I saw and I'm kind of like you, like, 674 00:36:28,840 --> 00:36:31,799 Speaker 1: I'm so used to it. It's been so many years now, 675 00:36:31,840 --> 00:36:34,719 Speaker 1: it's been we're almost seven years in of hearing those 676 00:36:34,800 --> 00:36:36,040 Speaker 1: kind of things still makes. 677 00:36:35,920 --> 00:36:38,719 Speaker 3: My mom so angry. Tell her not to respond, do 678 00:36:38,840 --> 00:36:39,480 Speaker 3: not engage. 679 00:36:39,719 --> 00:36:44,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, well, what I realized every once in a while 680 00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:46,920 Speaker 1: if you dig into one of those people. And I 681 00:36:46,920 --> 00:36:49,960 Speaker 1: don't recommend doing that, but I do remember a specific 682 00:36:50,040 --> 00:36:55,240 Speaker 1: guy who was like calling me a murderer, awful parent. 683 00:36:55,600 --> 00:36:58,439 Speaker 1: I should be locked up in jail. Should they should 684 00:36:58,480 --> 00:37:03,480 Speaker 1: take my kids away? You know that I was probably drunk, 685 00:37:03,560 --> 00:37:07,440 Speaker 1: you know, crazy, He was like going off, and I 686 00:37:07,480 --> 00:37:12,560 Speaker 1: when I went to d m him and try to 687 00:37:12,600 --> 00:37:15,960 Speaker 1: just come in with kindness and come to find out, 688 00:37:16,000 --> 00:37:19,279 Speaker 1: after I pulled back some layers, his wife had just 689 00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:26,200 Speaker 1: died of cancer, and and I think he his reaction was, 690 00:37:27,560 --> 00:37:31,080 Speaker 1: my wife was an incredible woman and she did this 691 00:37:31,160 --> 00:37:34,720 Speaker 1: and that, Like she worked at a daycare and everyone 692 00:37:34,840 --> 00:37:38,080 Speaker 1: in town was, you know, needed her and relied on her. 693 00:37:39,000 --> 00:37:42,560 Speaker 1: And now she's gone and her memory's gone. And now 694 00:37:42,600 --> 00:37:46,520 Speaker 1: your son gets gets on the news and he did 695 00:37:46,600 --> 00:37:50,600 Speaker 1: nothing and you did nothing. Why why doesn't my wife's story? 696 00:37:51,040 --> 00:37:53,920 Speaker 1: Like that was the source of the anger, was why 697 00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:59,160 Speaker 1: doesn't my wife wasn't her story told worldwide? What is 698 00:37:59,200 --> 00:38:03,759 Speaker 1: this idiot celebrity guy get his son that was just 699 00:38:03,800 --> 00:38:07,680 Speaker 1: a freak accident because he's negligent? What is that what 700 00:38:07,760 --> 00:38:13,359 Speaker 1: Fox News talks about? And I was like, I'm so sorry, man, 701 00:38:15,160 --> 00:38:17,840 Speaker 1: I didn't know your wife, but she sounds like an 702 00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:18,600 Speaker 1: amazing woman. 703 00:38:20,280 --> 00:38:22,359 Speaker 2: I'm so sorry, and it's like ended it there. 704 00:38:22,480 --> 00:38:25,200 Speaker 3: Yeah, I've done that a few times. I don't engage often, 705 00:38:25,239 --> 00:38:27,560 Speaker 3: but when I do, it's the same thing. They just 706 00:38:27,600 --> 00:38:29,439 Speaker 3: want to be heard. They want their story to be heard. 707 00:38:29,440 --> 00:38:31,239 Speaker 3: And when you when I did come at them with 708 00:38:31,360 --> 00:38:36,799 Speaker 3: kindness and love, it disarmed them and they eventually would 709 00:38:36,840 --> 00:38:37,600 Speaker 3: end up apologizing. 710 00:38:37,680 --> 00:38:39,560 Speaker 1: Yeah, they came back and they say, I'm so sorry 711 00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:42,439 Speaker 1: about River. I was out of line with the things 712 00:38:42,480 --> 00:38:42,839 Speaker 1: I said. 713 00:38:43,680 --> 00:38:47,080 Speaker 3: It just comes from a place of hurt. Yeah, I 714 00:38:47,120 --> 00:38:47,360 Speaker 3: know that. 715 00:38:47,480 --> 00:38:52,480 Speaker 4: Now. What a blessing that the interaction that you had 716 00:38:52,520 --> 00:38:55,480 Speaker 4: with that woman that because that's interactions that we talk 717 00:38:55,560 --> 00:39:03,520 Speaker 4: about potentially having one day on the other side of Cory. Yeah, 718 00:39:03,800 --> 00:39:08,200 Speaker 4: And I wonder sometimes when things like that happen, if 719 00:39:09,800 --> 00:39:14,239 Speaker 4: if God isn't just going Yeah, I think she might 720 00:39:14,239 --> 00:39:17,080 Speaker 4: need it now and pull it out of eternity and 721 00:39:17,160 --> 00:39:18,360 Speaker 4: put it in to now. 722 00:39:19,320 --> 00:39:26,719 Speaker 2: Yeah. Do you have a favorite part of the book. 723 00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:28,360 Speaker 2: I've named my few parts. 724 00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:39,000 Speaker 3: Favorite part that's difficult, obviously. I think I would have 725 00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:41,760 Speaker 3: to say the Offense. The chapter called the Offense because 726 00:39:41,800 --> 00:39:45,759 Speaker 3: it's when like I've met you where you are, and 727 00:39:45,800 --> 00:39:48,080 Speaker 3: I've told you all my story. But then I get 728 00:39:48,080 --> 00:39:50,279 Speaker 3: to the part where, okay, kind of like that moment 729 00:39:50,280 --> 00:39:52,600 Speaker 3: that the Lord did for me, like enough, and I 730 00:39:52,680 --> 00:39:54,680 Speaker 3: tell you really hard truths that you need to know. 731 00:39:54,760 --> 00:39:57,440 Speaker 3: And I feel like I needed to know these, and 732 00:39:57,480 --> 00:39:59,600 Speaker 3: so as your sister in Christ, if you're reading this book, 733 00:39:59,640 --> 00:40:01,600 Speaker 3: I need to tell you what the Bible says, you 734 00:40:01,680 --> 00:40:03,520 Speaker 3: need to look to the Lord. And so it was 735 00:40:03,960 --> 00:40:06,359 Speaker 3: a chapter that might offend some people, but it's truth 736 00:40:06,560 --> 00:40:09,360 Speaker 3: that I came to know and trust and believe, and 737 00:40:09,400 --> 00:40:11,520 Speaker 3: I feel like it would help them. So that's where 738 00:40:11,560 --> 00:40:12,759 Speaker 3: I want them to be. I want to meet them 739 00:40:12,800 --> 00:40:14,400 Speaker 3: where they are, but I don't want them to stay stuck. 740 00:40:14,560 --> 00:40:15,840 Speaker 3: I want them to get up off the floor and 741 00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:18,440 Speaker 3: move forward. I think I really loved writing the offense. 742 00:40:20,239 --> 00:40:22,040 Speaker 3: Not that I wanted to offend you, but it might 743 00:40:22,560 --> 00:40:26,440 Speaker 3: it might. Thanks for being on, Thanks for having me, 744 00:40:26,760 --> 00:40:29,200 Speaker 3: Thanks for giving me the book title and encouraging. 745 00:40:29,640 --> 00:40:33,040 Speaker 2: You don't have to tell people that it's. 746 00:40:32,520 --> 00:40:35,440 Speaker 3: I don't have to. I want to. I'm so thankful. 747 00:40:35,520 --> 00:40:38,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, Growling about Them Floor available right now anywhere books 748 00:40:38,600 --> 00:40:43,000 Speaker 1: are sold. Follow Amber Emily Smith on all socials and 749 00:40:43,120 --> 00:40:45,920 Speaker 1: I'm excited to see what the Lord is going to 750 00:40:45,960 --> 00:40:50,280 Speaker 1: do with your story that he wrote. 751 00:40:50,760 --> 00:40:52,000 Speaker 2: Yeah. Amen, see you guys. 752 00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:56,080 Speaker 1: Thank you so much for hanging out with me on 753 00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:58,719 Speaker 1: this episode of the granger Smith Podcast. I appreciate you 754 00:40:58,800 --> 00:41:00,960 Speaker 1: being here. If you're listing right now, go ahead and 755 00:41:01,080 --> 00:41:03,799 Speaker 1: rate today's podcast. It helps more folks find the show. 756 00:41:03,880 --> 00:41:05,800 Speaker 1: And if you're tuning in on the iHeartRadio app, you 757 00:41:05,840 --> 00:41:08,400 Speaker 1: could actually set this podcast as one of your presets, 758 00:41:08,480 --> 00:41:10,800 Speaker 1: which is cool that way. I'm just one tap away. 759 00:41:10,920 --> 00:41:13,080 Speaker 1: If you're watching on YouTube, don't forget to hit like 760 00:41:13,120 --> 00:41:15,560 Speaker 1: and subscribe so you don't miss any new episodes. And 761 00:41:15,560 --> 00:41:17,759 Speaker 1: if you've got a question you want answered right here 762 00:41:17,760 --> 00:41:21,120 Speaker 1: on the show, just email me podcast at grangersmith dot com. 763 00:41:21,160 --> 00:41:23,319 Speaker 2: I'd love to hear from you. Thanks again for being here. 764 00:41:23,360 --> 00:41:24,160 Speaker 2: We'll see you next time. 765 00:41:24,239 --> 00:41:34,359 Speaker 4: Ye