1 00:00:02,880 --> 00:00:08,320 Speaker 1: Damn he haged it started the donkey. I ain't trying 2 00:00:08,360 --> 00:00:09,640 Speaker 1: to be donkey today no more. 3 00:00:09,720 --> 00:00:11,920 Speaker 2: They should be embarrassed by what they already did. I'm 4 00:00:11,920 --> 00:00:13,960 Speaker 2: not making these people do these days called Donkey of 5 00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:17,800 Speaker 2: the day, and it really caught me off guard. Damn Charlamagne, 6 00:00:17,920 --> 00:00:20,240 Speaker 2: who got the donkey out of the day today? 7 00:00:22,120 --> 00:00:23,360 Speaker 1: Well, Jess, hilarious. 8 00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:26,239 Speaker 2: Donkey of to Day from Monday, September eleventh goes to 9 00:00:26,280 --> 00:00:29,400 Speaker 2: the New York Football Giants as a staff organization and 10 00:00:29,480 --> 00:00:31,720 Speaker 2: mother f and crew New York Giants fans. 11 00:00:31,840 --> 00:00:33,840 Speaker 1: You getting some of this heat hard too, Okay. 12 00:00:33,920 --> 00:00:36,080 Speaker 2: I have no idea why they are known as the 13 00:00:36,080 --> 00:00:39,320 Speaker 2: Football Giants, especially after what my Dallas Cowboys did to 14 00:00:39,360 --> 00:00:42,280 Speaker 2: them last night. You would think on the eve of 15 00:00:42,360 --> 00:00:45,160 Speaker 2: the twenty second anniversary of nine eleven, the New York 16 00:00:45,159 --> 00:00:47,559 Speaker 2: Giants would have some type of inspiration, some type of 17 00:00:47,600 --> 00:00:50,880 Speaker 2: motivation to show up and be the best version of themselves, 18 00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:53,640 Speaker 2: But instead they ended up being the only team in 19 00:00:53,680 --> 00:00:58,080 Speaker 2: the whole NFL who couldn't put up a single point 20 00:00:58,720 --> 00:01:01,680 Speaker 2: on Sunday. I don't even know if that status correct, 21 00:01:01,720 --> 00:01:03,720 Speaker 2: but it feels right. It feels like the New York 22 00:01:03,760 --> 00:01:06,280 Speaker 2: Giants were the only team in the NFL who didn't 23 00:01:06,280 --> 00:01:09,760 Speaker 2: score a single point on Sundale. Okay, correct me in 24 00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:12,520 Speaker 2: the comments if I'm wrong. If not, who cares? All right, 25 00:01:12,520 --> 00:01:14,920 Speaker 2: who cares about the truth when the lie is more entertained. 26 00:01:14,920 --> 00:01:17,200 Speaker 2: And now, if you haven't heard, the final score last 27 00:01:17,280 --> 00:01:20,880 Speaker 2: night was forty to zero. I mean that Cowboys D 28 00:01:21,040 --> 00:01:24,880 Speaker 2: was penetrating the Giants old line all night with no lubrication. 29 00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:27,280 Speaker 2: All right, let's go to CBS two New York for 30 00:01:27,319 --> 00:01:28,039 Speaker 2: the report police. 31 00:01:28,959 --> 00:01:34,360 Speaker 3: So there's that forty to nothing, your prime time final 32 00:01:34,880 --> 00:01:37,319 Speaker 3: between the Cowboys and the Giants. 33 00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:41,360 Speaker 1: It was wet, it was wild, and it had some 34 00:01:41,560 --> 00:01:42,200 Speaker 1: history in it. 35 00:01:42,760 --> 00:01:46,160 Speaker 3: Forty points is the largest shutout victory and a Cowboys 36 00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:49,960 Speaker 3: opener in the history of the franchise. Forty points is 37 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:54,720 Speaker 3: the largest shutout loss in an opener in Giants franchise history. 38 00:01:55,840 --> 00:01:56,440 Speaker 1: It was wet. 39 00:01:56,440 --> 00:01:58,240 Speaker 2: That's why it made it so easy for the Cowboys 40 00:01:58,320 --> 00:02:00,720 Speaker 2: D to penetrate. Now, look, it was the even nine 41 00:02:00,760 --> 00:02:03,960 Speaker 2: to eleven as well, Okay, and America's team showed up. 42 00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:07,440 Speaker 2: That moment was for America. Okay, that moment was for 43 00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:10,840 Speaker 2: America's team. We knew what America needed, and we delivered, 44 00:02:10,919 --> 00:02:13,040 Speaker 2: all right, we knew what the moment was. We wasn't 45 00:02:13,040 --> 00:02:15,519 Speaker 2: gonna let America down at a time like this. In fact, 46 00:02:15,560 --> 00:02:17,000 Speaker 2: we knew that it was gonna be a tough time 47 00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:18,880 Speaker 2: for the Giants, which is why we decided to bring 48 00:02:18,919 --> 00:02:21,560 Speaker 2: forties for the whole team. You know, growing up, if 49 00:02:21,600 --> 00:02:23,600 Speaker 2: one of your homies was going through something, you pull 50 00:02:23,639 --> 00:02:25,639 Speaker 2: up with an ice cold forty to try to numb 51 00:02:25,720 --> 00:02:26,040 Speaker 2: the pain. 52 00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:28,400 Speaker 1: And last night was probably the first time in a 53 00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:29,239 Speaker 1: long time. 54 00:02:29,120 --> 00:02:30,679 Speaker 2: That a lot of people in New York drink a 55 00:02:30,720 --> 00:02:33,480 Speaker 2: fortyo And that's why so many of them were looking 56 00:02:33,560 --> 00:02:35,919 Speaker 2: sick last night and probably feel a little hung over 57 00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:38,800 Speaker 2: the day. See that Cowboys Fortyo hit different, all right? 58 00:02:38,880 --> 00:02:41,399 Speaker 2: Forty oo is Saint Ives, Older English Cold, forty five, 59 00:02:41,480 --> 00:02:44,800 Speaker 2: Slip Small Liquor, that Blue Bull, that two eleven Hurricane, 60 00:02:44,840 --> 00:02:45,799 Speaker 2: Mickey's King Kobra. 61 00:02:46,040 --> 00:02:48,400 Speaker 1: None of them hit like that Cowboys forty Yo. 62 00:02:48,560 --> 00:02:50,520 Speaker 2: Now I know there was a lot of Dominicans in 63 00:02:50,560 --> 00:02:53,200 Speaker 2: New York last night who feel like they put on 64 00:02:53,639 --> 00:02:57,600 Speaker 2: white jeans and blue Giants jerseys for absolutely no reason. 65 00:02:58,440 --> 00:02:59,960 Speaker 2: And who am I to tell you different? You are 66 00:03:00,040 --> 00:03:02,520 Speaker 2: absolutely correct. You put on those white jeans in that 67 00:03:02,560 --> 00:03:05,480 Speaker 2: blue Giants Jersey for no damn reason that all last 68 00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:08,480 Speaker 2: night and the weather was disgusting, so those white jeans 69 00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:12,280 Speaker 2: got ruined. I guarantee dry cleaners all over New York 70 00:03:12,360 --> 00:03:15,280 Speaker 2: City are being bombarded with the white jeans today because 71 00:03:15,320 --> 00:03:17,160 Speaker 2: of all the Dominicans who put on a white who 72 00:03:17,160 --> 00:03:19,320 Speaker 2: put on white jeans in the Blue Giants Jersey last 73 00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:22,480 Speaker 2: night to watch my Dallas Cowboys disman through the New York. 74 00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:26,560 Speaker 1: Giants forty to zero. Now envy this morning. 75 00:03:26,560 --> 00:03:28,360 Speaker 2: I want to tell you the story of the cucumber, 76 00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:33,200 Speaker 2: the pickle, the penis, and the New York Giants fan. 77 00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:34,760 Speaker 1: Would you like to hear it? No? 78 00:03:35,440 --> 00:03:38,680 Speaker 2: So there was a cucumber, right, a pickle, a penis 79 00:03:38,680 --> 00:03:40,880 Speaker 2: in a New York Giants fan sitting around talking about 80 00:03:40,880 --> 00:03:42,120 Speaker 2: how bad their lives were. 81 00:03:42,120 --> 00:03:45,120 Speaker 1: The pickle says, uh, you know, that's nothing. 82 00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:47,720 Speaker 2: When I get you know, big and hard, they stick 83 00:03:47,760 --> 00:03:49,960 Speaker 2: me in a jar full of vinegar and vacuum sealed 84 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:53,000 Speaker 2: met and the penis says, my life is the worst. 85 00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:54,840 Speaker 2: When I get big and hard, they put a rubber 86 00:03:54,880 --> 00:03:56,600 Speaker 2: tarp on my head and stick me in a dark 87 00:03:56,680 --> 00:03:58,560 Speaker 2: room and bang my head against the wall until I 88 00:03:58,600 --> 00:03:59,560 Speaker 2: throw up and pass out. 89 00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:01,200 Speaker 1: New York Giants fans. 90 00:04:00,960 --> 00:04:04,200 Speaker 2: Said, my life is terrible because I can't handle big D. 91 00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:08,200 Speaker 2: But side note, Giants fans love little d well like 92 00:04:08,280 --> 00:04:12,040 Speaker 2: little D. Yes you do, don't you? Envy invY? You 93 00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:14,080 Speaker 2: a father liked me. Let's see if you can guess 94 00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:16,359 Speaker 2: these dad jokes. Okay, you want to. 95 00:04:16,320 --> 00:04:17,920 Speaker 1: Guess some of them? Sure? Huh. 96 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:20,880 Speaker 2: Why doesn't New York Giants quarterback Daniel Jones use the 97 00:04:20,880 --> 00:04:21,560 Speaker 2: phone anymore? 98 00:04:23,360 --> 00:04:27,160 Speaker 1: Why? Because you can't find the receivers? Listen? Want another one? 99 00:04:27,360 --> 00:04:29,600 Speaker 1: How many Giants fans does it take the final light, 100 00:04:29,640 --> 00:04:30,279 Speaker 1: Bob Envy? 101 00:04:30,720 --> 00:04:31,239 Speaker 4: How many? 102 00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:34,320 Speaker 2: None? Because they are happy living in the Cowboys shadow. 103 00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:36,719 Speaker 2: I got another one for you. What's the difference between 104 00:04:36,760 --> 00:04:38,440 Speaker 2: the New York Giants and a dollar bill? 105 00:04:38,560 --> 00:04:38,880 Speaker 1: Envy? 106 00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:42,039 Speaker 2: What you can still get four quarters out of a 107 00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:42,560 Speaker 2: dollar bill? 108 00:04:42,800 --> 00:04:46,040 Speaker 1: Last night? The Giants couldn't give you one? Want one more? 109 00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:46,360 Speaker 2: Huh? 110 00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:47,520 Speaker 1: Want one more? Huh? 111 00:04:47,720 --> 00:04:50,680 Speaker 2: No? What did the New York Giants and Chick fil 112 00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:53,560 Speaker 2: A workers have in common yesterday? 113 00:04:54,640 --> 00:04:57,640 Speaker 1: I know you know this. Come on, come. 114 00:04:57,400 --> 00:04:59,880 Speaker 4: On, come on, They're off on Sunday. 115 00:05:00,240 --> 00:05:04,560 Speaker 1: Neither one of them showed up for work on Sunday. Look, 116 00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:05,320 Speaker 1: I'm here all week. 117 00:05:05,800 --> 00:05:07,960 Speaker 2: No, literally, I'm here all week reminding you that my 118 00:05:08,040 --> 00:05:11,080 Speaker 2: Dallas Cowboys have the best D in the league. Last night, 119 00:05:11,120 --> 00:05:13,560 Speaker 2: the Giants got the first taste of the big D 120 00:05:13,960 --> 00:05:16,520 Speaker 2: that the league will be sucking on all season, and 121 00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:19,239 Speaker 2: on February eleventh, we will be playing in the Super 122 00:05:19,240 --> 00:05:22,640 Speaker 2: Bowl in Vegas. But no need to get ahead of ourselves. 123 00:05:22,880 --> 00:05:25,560 Speaker 2: Let's just enjoy the process, starting with the forty to 124 00:05:25,720 --> 00:05:28,920 Speaker 2: zero ass cutting we put on the New York Football 125 00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:31,840 Speaker 2: Giants last night. Now, can we please give the New 126 00:05:31,920 --> 00:05:35,400 Speaker 2: York Giants the sweet sounds of the hamiltones. 127 00:05:35,920 --> 00:05:56,440 Speaker 5: You ally, oh the day, ye oh the day ye. 128 00:05:56,279 --> 00:05:58,440 Speaker 2: And in case you're wondering, the cucumbers life is terrible 129 00:05:58,480 --> 00:06:00,359 Speaker 2: because when the cucumber gets big and hard, they uh 130 00:06:00,920 --> 00:06:02,240 Speaker 2: chop it up and put it in the salad. 131 00:06:03,120 --> 00:06:04,200 Speaker 1: I just want to throw that out there. 132 00:06:04,440 --> 00:06:07,719 Speaker 4: I would just like to say, you act like people 133 00:06:07,760 --> 00:06:10,360 Speaker 4: can't have a bad day. Like you ever have sex 134 00:06:10,440 --> 00:06:13,400 Speaker 4: and then boom happens too fast. That's a bad day. 135 00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:15,840 Speaker 4: You ever go to the casino and don't win, that's 136 00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:20,039 Speaker 4: a bad day. You ever you know need a haircut 137 00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:21,239 Speaker 4: and then you forget your hat. 138 00:06:22,200 --> 00:06:23,000 Speaker 1: You had a bad day. 139 00:06:23,400 --> 00:06:26,240 Speaker 4: You ever walk down the street and step in some poop. 140 00:06:27,200 --> 00:06:28,039 Speaker 1: You had a bad day. 141 00:06:30,560 --> 00:06:32,440 Speaker 4: You ever walk down the street and a pigeon is 142 00:06:32,440 --> 00:06:34,440 Speaker 4: showing you it's a bad day. 143 00:06:34,480 --> 00:06:35,680 Speaker 1: We all have bad days. 144 00:06:36,400 --> 00:06:38,240 Speaker 2: What about when somebody box your mouth? Is that a 145 00:06:38,240 --> 00:06:41,159 Speaker 2: bad day? That threatening somebody with a good time? You 146 00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:41,720 Speaker 2: know one? 147 00:06:41,800 --> 00:06:41,920 Speaker 5: Is it? 148 00:06:42,920 --> 00:06:44,560 Speaker 1: It depends where you're at. It depends where you're at. 149 00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:46,840 Speaker 1: All right, okay, all right, all right, well. 150 00:06:46,760 --> 00:06:48,560 Speaker 4: Thank you for that dog to day be et will 151 00:06:48,600 --> 00:06:49,840 Speaker 4: see you'll tomorrow, piece. 152 00:06:49,680 --> 00:06:52,160 Speaker 2: B et donkey, today is brought to you by the 153 00:06:52,240 --> 00:06:55,280 Speaker 2: law office of Michael Slaminsoft. Don't be a donkey. Do 154 00:06:55,480 --> 00:06:58,200 Speaker 2: pound two fifty on yourself and say the bull. If 155 00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:00,560 Speaker 2: you've been hurting a construction accident, that's down to five 156 00:07:00,600 --> 00:07:02,160 Speaker 2: O from yourself and say the bull. 157 00:07:02,960 --> 00:07:05,800 Speaker 1: Wake that ass up Earth in the morning. The Breakfast 158 00:07:05,880 --> 00:07:06,159 Speaker 1: Club 159 00:07:10,320 --> 00:07:10,360 Speaker 3: H