Speaker 1: Welcome to Get It to Dutch. A screenwriter's Journey.
Speaker 2: I'm Mark, I'm Greg, I'm Brendan aka BB Starland.
Speaker 1: Okay, BB Starland, and we are a team of Hollywood
Speaker 1: screenwriters who meet every week to read from an original
Speaker 1: screenplay that one of us has written. We give notes
Speaker 1: and rank the scripts, and at the end of the season, well,
Speaker 1: we were going to pitch the best script to now
Speaker 1: deceased Dutch Huxley, but hopefully we'll be pitching to his
Speaker 1: son Duck. So let's get into new business. I have
Speaker 1: a little item of new business. Great. Okay, wait, now
Speaker 1: this loosely connects to the industry because it's just one
Speaker 1: of these annoying LA things. I'm sure you got this.
Speaker 1: Our old pal, Keith Morasco, has asked us to contribute
Speaker 1: to his divorce registry, which is sad news in a
Speaker 1: lot of ways.
Speaker 2: He's getting divorced, but not really. I mean, it's kind
Speaker 2: of typical. He gets divorced every year or two.
Speaker 3: Falling for it.
Speaker 4: But now that he's in LA, he gets to do
Speaker 4: this divorce registry.
Speaker 1: I don't know what it is about LA that somehow
Speaker 1: we all decided that this was going to be a
Speaker 1: thing we're gonna do in divorce registry. So if you
Speaker 1: if you're in a part of the country that doesn't
Speaker 1: have these things, maybe it hasn't spread. The virus hasn't
Speaker 1: spread this far. You can either buy him something on
Speaker 1: his divorce registry, just like a wedding registry, or you
Speaker 1: can buy back something that you bought him for his
Speaker 1: wedding on his wedding registry. Now he asked me to
Speaker 1: give him five hundred bucks for the locker set that
Speaker 1: I bought him on his wedding registry, and it only
Speaker 1: costs three hundred dollars the first time, so I'm out
Speaker 1: eight hundred bucks.
Speaker 3: Does get better with age.
Speaker 2: It's so hard to know what to do in the
Speaker 2: level at which you participate in one of these things.
Speaker 1: The thing is he's going to be out on his ass,
Speaker 1: so you got to get him something. And the things
Speaker 1: that are on the list are like a futon sad cagurator, cagerator.
Speaker 4: A Hammock emailed me, asking me if I had his
Speaker 4: old Supernintendo, so he's just like fully going back to sixteen.
Speaker 1: I think think a single serve coffee maker, A bong
Speaker 1: is on there. Wow, a trans am is on there.
Speaker 2: I just went ahead and went cheap and I got
Speaker 2: him a diamond studied earring.
Speaker 4: Well, I didn't get him anything for his wedding. I'm
Speaker 4: not getting him anything for.
Speaker 2: This tiled Morasco fiasco.
Speaker 1: Sure is in VISI line is on there, So I
Speaker 1: don't know. I feel like I'm going to be in
Speaker 1: the hole for this guy. I know him the best.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you know, honestly I wanted I was hoping
Speaker 2: that he would just do one of those conscious on
Speaker 2: couplings because then they usually can't do the divorce registry.
Speaker 2: Well have you heard about that? Well, that's when everybody
Speaker 2: that's where you and your partner and then everybody that
Speaker 2: you know, stands in a circle and agrees that you
Speaker 2: shouldn't be together. But it's supposedly some patico. It's what
Speaker 2: Gwyneth Paltrow does with all her husbands.
Speaker 1: Oh but she's a billionaire. Yeah, of course, Keith not
Speaker 1: a billionaire. The Morasco fiasco is that he doesn't have
Speaker 1: any of his own stuff.
Speaker 2: Yeah, his teeth are going to look great though with
Speaker 2: that hearing.
Speaker 1: Do you have anything, Greg.
Speaker 2: I do, I've got some new business. I have a.
Speaker 1: Date whoa the anti Morasco. That's right.
Speaker 2: So love died a new love rose has blossomed exactly
Speaker 2: And it was where love died because I actually got
Speaker 2: the number at a funeral.
Speaker 4: Funeral, at a Dutches's funeral, Duchess funeral.
Speaker 1: Yeah, whos a number? Did you?
Speaker 2: I'm not going to get into that.
Speaker 4: Was it the widow Huxley?
Speaker 1: How did you know that this is a bad idea? No,
Speaker 1: it's not. It's a great idea. How did we know?
Speaker 1: Because she would be the worst person for you to
Speaker 1: be dating. And if I know anything about Greg's dating
Speaker 1: history age that he makes very poor decisions. So here's
Speaker 1: the thing, man, we're trying to pitch to Duck. This
Speaker 1: is the worst thing you can do.
Speaker 4: Man, there isn't a kid on fucking earth who wants
Speaker 4: to be friends with someone.
Speaker 3: Who's blinking his mom. That's why I hate my dad.
Speaker 1: Friends.
Speaker 2: The heart has its reasons, which reason knows nothing of God.
Speaker 3: You are going to fuck this up?
Speaker 1: No, I'm not.
Speaker 2: Just let me play the school okay. Also, Duck is
Speaker 2: older than me. He's going to be fine with me
Speaker 2: fucking his mom.
Speaker 4: Oh, don't say it like that. Even hearing it in
Speaker 4: the years.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So ultimately, this I think is my last podcast
Speaker 2: because I'm going.
Speaker 1: To be moving up to Monacito. What Yeah, dude, nice,
Speaker 1: absolutely not can just walk out on the podcast.
Speaker 2: Man, I think I've gotten what I need to get
Speaker 2: out of this podcast, which is kind of a relationship.
Speaker 1: That's what you wanted out of the podcast. You can
Speaker 1: do that on an app, Dude. We're trying to sell
Speaker 1: a fucking script mark. I'm taking the elevator. You guys
Speaker 1: are taking the escalator. I've basically landed where I need to,
Speaker 1: which is a nice summer place in Montecito.
Speaker 2: It's so great up there there.
Speaker 1: It is Gregg's ulterior motive.
Speaker 2: You're welcome to come up some time and have lobster roles.
Speaker 1: The good news is, I guess you'll be moving off
Speaker 1: my couch, so you all need to go.
Speaker 3: You get your place back.
Speaker 2: No, I will still be crashing here for a little
Speaker 2: while until you know. The redesign at Monasito's is Bully
Speaker 2: for me. Guys. We always said there'd be two ways
Speaker 2: this podcast would end. If we sell a screenplay or
Speaker 2: one of us falls in love.
Speaker 1: We said it one of us got murdered, meaning here
Speaker 1: until death or a sale, whichever comes first.
Speaker 2: Well, I'm changing the rules because I am in love
Speaker 2: and headed to Monacito eventually.
Speaker 3: Okay, we'm up.
Speaker 2: Sometime both actually, don't come up. You guys need to
Speaker 2: clean up if you ever come up. Geez, like, look
Speaker 2: like you could be in Monacito. You guys look like
Speaker 2: the guys that they hire to come into Monacito when
Speaker 2: there's a mud slide and they need to clean it up.
Speaker 4: Oh, that was my first gig when I got here.
Speaker 1: Really.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you guys are probably wondering why I'm wearing sunglasses
Speaker 4: over my regular glass.
Speaker 2: Oh I thought you just had those ones that change
Speaker 2: color when you go into outside and they were broken.
Speaker 4: No, because it's for me to whip off and say
Speaker 4: this is definitely my last podcast.
Speaker 3: Mah woo.
Speaker 1: Why what?
Speaker 4: Oh bbe starland AyKa Brendan is on his way because
Speaker 4: he yes, got word from Nan that I am check
Speaker 4: a veil on Big.
Speaker 2: Wonder Amazing woo check the veil. So are you pinned?
Speaker 4: Well, I'm check availed to be on hold waiting to
Speaker 4: be pinned.
Speaker 1: So you're on deck.
Speaker 4: I'm practically on set. For those who don't know, I'm
Speaker 4: practically on.
Speaker 2: I think that's that bad.
Speaker 1: If you're on set, that's at bad. I thought you
Speaker 1: bombed them.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I thought it didn't go well.
Speaker 4: Well, you know, I realized that's probably just something I do.
Speaker 4: I tell myself that I bomb so that when I
Speaker 4: get it, I feel fucking awesome, which I do.
Speaker 1: Right now, this is great Man's last shakes. Don't shake
Speaker 1: on it. What do I have? Then? This is all
Speaker 1: I have?
Speaker 2: You have the podcast mark.
Speaker 1: Right, But I can't do it by myself.
Speaker 2: Sure, you can keep chugging away. We believe in you.
Speaker 2: We think your scripts are great.
Speaker 4: Hey, listen, bud baby, this is how this industry works.
Speaker 4: You're down in the muck, so I can lift you up. Okay,
Speaker 4: here's what I'm willing to do. Okay, sometime around season
Speaker 4: three or four on Big Wonder, I'll talk to the
Speaker 4: show runners see if they got a spot and they
Speaker 4: were the showrunners for Big Wonder.
Speaker 3: It's a ship being and Amy Bosco Brandt.
Speaker 1: Really Coppleman, Marlene Koppleman, No Kopleman.
Speaker 3: Did the pilot? Did bring and shep?
Speaker 1: And Amian? What did shep?
Speaker 2: Bing?
Speaker 1: And Amy Bosco Brandt? Right?
Speaker 3: I mean basically all of nineties television.
Speaker 1: Bokmates, yes, all the classics, bunk Mates, pals A hand
Speaker 1: Rahan and Hairn hand Rahan.
Speaker 2: Oh, they did all the Murphy's shows, right, Murphy's Law,
Speaker 2: Murphy's Dental, Murphy's Bakery, and of.
Speaker 4: Course the first openly gay character on TV.
Speaker 1: And figuring it out. That's right.
Speaker 2: And then they did Finger Figure figure.
Speaker 4: In comes comes out as gay to his family, figuring
Speaker 4: it out. So there you go, Bud, Look, I talked
Speaker 4: to those two and before you know it, Bing Bang Boom.
Speaker 4: Maybe you're getting coffees and stuff, and then this thing
Speaker 4: goes twenty seasons.
Speaker 3: Maybe finally you get a script. That's how the industry works.
Speaker 1: Is Bing Bang Boom a shep bing reference?
Speaker 2: Bing Bang Boom was a show that that's what the
Speaker 2: Big Bang theory stole, right, that was bing. It was
Speaker 2: originally called Bing Bang Boom.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, congratulations, I'm glad you got it.
Speaker 4: Thank you, I'm thrilled. Originally, of course, the part of
Speaker 4: George on Big Wonder was going to Jimmy Squiggs.
Speaker 1: But he passed.
Speaker 2: Oh he passed on the project.
Speaker 1: He passed.
Speaker 3: No, he passed, he's dead.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, yeah, so I'm having to do the pilot
Speaker 4: for free, because they already paid him to do it.
Speaker 4: But you know, if this thing goes to series, there
Speaker 4: may be room to breed negotiate.
Speaker 1: Maybe you better check on that.
Speaker 4: Well, our news is pretty huge, and poor Mark just
Speaker 4: has this divorce registry thing.
Speaker 3: I feel so sad. You look like I said, a
Speaker 3: little puppy.
Speaker 2: Yeah it's okay, man. You have to podcast. Keep churning,
Speaker 2: keep plugging away, keep slapping the scripts down, and you
Speaker 2: guys ever want.
Speaker 1: To guess that would help me out a ton all.
Speaker 2: Just please on the podcast. Yeah, I'll be up at Montecito.
Speaker 2: It's a pretty far drive.
Speaker 4: Just grow talk to Nan for me. She does my scheduling.
Speaker 4: Now I'm finally getting Nan to do my scheduling and
Speaker 4: not some intern.
Speaker 1: We couldn't come down from Montecito.
Speaker 2: I don't think the helicopter could land on this roof.
Speaker 2: It's not it doesn't support it. How sturdy is this roof?
Speaker 1: Should we even do the podcast? Asked today? But let's
Speaker 1: go out? Why would we do it?
Speaker 2: Let's send this thing out with a bang?
Speaker 3: Yeah, the bang, bing bang boom.
Speaker 1: Come on, Mark, let's just do one more.
Speaker 4: The whole gang's together. One more time. We're all in
Speaker 4: the saddle. Let's take the horse into the barn and
Speaker 4: shoot it in its fucking head.
Speaker 1: All right, make some glue out of it.
Speaker 3: So okay, so much it wrong with it? The dead
Speaker 3: horse is yours to do.
Speaker 1: The Let's do the backstory on today's script. Last week,
Speaker 1: Brendan was on the Disney lot.
Speaker 2: That were you on the Disney lot for another audition?
Speaker 4: No, I was just taking the tour, but I got
Speaker 4: lost trying to find a bathroom. I walk by this boardroom.
Speaker 4: I see this blue little note card on it and
Speaker 4: it says opposite day. Then of course the security bust in.
Speaker 4: They escort me out. Uh NaN's working to clear all
Speaker 4: that up for me.
Speaker 1: But so opposite Day, which is very cool. We decided
Speaker 1: to write Disney's Opposite Day and then we'll try to
Speaker 1: sell it back to Disney. Yeah, baby is not steal,
Speaker 1: not steal, This is not It's delivering exactly what they're
Speaker 1: looking for.
Speaker 4: It's in the zeitgeist, and it is, in my humble opinion,
Speaker 4: the most unmissible idea of all time.
Speaker 1: Basically writes itself. It's Jordan on a breakaway totally, he
Speaker 1: writes itself.
Speaker 2: And since I was on my honeymoon phase with the
Speaker 2: widow Huxley and Brendan's been focusing on his big screen.
Speaker 2: Test Mark was the lucky one to draw the straw
Speaker 2: and just write it up.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and truly it was like we all agreed, it
Speaker 1: basically wrote itself. So I'm very happy to you know,
Speaker 1: be the one to tee it up and knock it
Speaker 1: out without any further ado.
Speaker 4: I present to you kind of Disney's Opposite the Perfect
Speaker 4: Last podcast. Huh, Disney's Opposite Day slam Dunk. I'm going
Speaker 4: to miss you, guys, so let me set up the
Speaker 4: script for you.
Speaker 1: This is Disney's Opposite Day. We focus on a young
Speaker 1: kid who's a pretty doofy. He gets bullied a lot,
Speaker 1: and he's very smart, and he's into science. He's he
Speaker 1: just doesn't have his uh, you know, his balance in
Speaker 1: middle school yet. But as we're going to see through
Speaker 1: a few of fate, his world is about to change.
Speaker 2: Yeah Earth, I mean you already, you can already see it.
Speaker 1: You can see it happening. Okay, Brenda wants you to
Speaker 1: take stage directions, and we are off.
Speaker 4: Exterior George W. Bush Middle school day. A bus pulls
Speaker 4: up in a gaggle of teens pile off. Last to
Speaker 4: step off is a pre pubescent duf and glasses. This
Speaker 4: is Chucky Wigglesworth.
Speaker 1: New school Year. All's I gotta do is fit in,
Speaker 1: stay cool and confident.
Speaker 4: We hear the toot of a horn. Chucky looks over
Speaker 4: and sees the bus driver waving at him.
Speaker 3: Have a right day, Dumpling. A group of bullies snicker.
Speaker 1: Dad, please don't call me dumpling.
Speaker 4: Can help it, Bud. You're a plump little dumpling and
Speaker 4: I love you more than anything. Chucky is shove from behind.
Speaker 1: Plump Dumpling. That means fat Wanton. The bus driver loves you,
Speaker 1: fat Wanton. Well, he is my dad.
Speaker 4: The bully pushes him in the mud. The mud splashes
Speaker 4: on a cheerleader.
Speaker 1: Uh, you got mud on my cheerleader skirt. Dork, sorry,
Speaker 1: Mallory oo check his pants out. He loves you.
Speaker 4: The bully points out a bulge in Chucky's pants. Everyone gasps, no, no, no,
Speaker 4: it's a lightsaber, a real life lightsaber. He reaches into
Speaker 4: his pants and pulls out the handle of a lightsaber.
Speaker 1: See. He presses a button and it.
Speaker 4: Immediately sparks and physics, knocking Chucky off his feet back
Speaker 4: into the mud puddle. He looks up to see Principal
Speaker 4: Wilcox with mud all over his trousers.
Speaker 2: Mister Wigglesworth, we do not pull lightsabers out of our
Speaker 2: pants at this school. My office.
Speaker 4: Now, As the rest of the teens filter into the school,
Speaker 4: Chucky's best friend Ali appears by his side. Dang, I
Speaker 4: guess I won't be seeing you for first period.
Speaker 1: Did you get the schematics on the flying skateboard?
Speaker 4: Ali unrolls a large blueprint. I figured out the stabilizer,
Speaker 4: but we still need the propulsion system.
Speaker 1: Have you tried lithium in kool aid?
Speaker 3: Hey, that could work.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna win the science fear and everybody's gonna see them.
Speaker 1: I'm the coolest guy in town. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Maybe if it was opposite day.
Speaker 4: Chucky's dad's bus drives away and splashes more mud on him.
Speaker 1: Oh sorry, I wish it was opposite day. Whoa we go?
Speaker 1: We go? Well, so much cool setup.
Speaker 4: You totally didn't overthink it. Great job, pal, oh man,
Speaker 4: I mean this is perfect. I can see where everything's.
Speaker 1: About to be opposite.
Speaker 2: You got the bullies, you got the girl, you got
Speaker 2: the flying skateboard.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's it's it's it's a pretty good story, you know,
Speaker 1: it's it's easy, wrote itself and yeah.
Speaker 4: And he didn't mark it up. Good job, get kept
Speaker 4: focused and then nailed it.
Speaker 1: This is great? All right? Nope? Hold on, Nan says,
Speaker 1: something's up with the deal.
Speaker 2: What I'm off?
Speaker 1: Check of ail? What does that mean?
Speaker 4: It probably just means I got it right? Nice, it's unpinned,
Speaker 4: She says, Good God, Gad got it?
Speaker 2: Life?
Speaker 1: Does that mean? Holy fuck?
Speaker 4: Hold on a second, let me ask you. Yeah, Brenda
Speaker 4: Jennings baby Starlind for Nan Man, Nan, Hey, Yeah, what
Speaker 4: is good?
Speaker 3: God? Gad got it? What does that mean? Josh Gad, Ron,
Speaker 3: Josh Gadd's dad, Ron Dad got it? Good God? How
Speaker 3: old is God's dad? What's Ron Wanton got to do
Speaker 3: with this? Oh? Ron one one? Why are you celebrating him?
Speaker 1: Nan? She fucking hung up?
Speaker 3: God damn it?
Speaker 1: Shit, what happened?
Speaker 3: Fucking life is over?
Speaker 1: What is good?
Speaker 2: God?
Speaker 1: God, God, Good God, Dad, good.
Speaker 3: God, Gad God? It means Ron Gad got it?
Speaker 4: Josh Gadd's dad round, Gad, God, George, he's George and
Speaker 4: big one.
Speaker 1: What the fuck is going on? Here.
Speaker 2: Oh fuck, I'm so sorry. Man.
Speaker 1: That sucks.
Speaker 2: At least you have this podcast.
Speaker 4: Maybe it's opposite day.
Speaker 3: Maybe I'm gonna take.
Speaker 1: Some nan and ask her it's not opposite day.
Speaker 4: Yeah, she says, it's not opposite day. I didn't get it,
Speaker 4: but it is opposite day that they're big fans. Oh
Speaker 4: they hate me. That's great. So all this time they've
Speaker 4: been saying big fans, they actually hate me.
Speaker 2: Don't dude, you cannot You can't have two slam dunks
Speaker 2: at the same time.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I have fucking nothing. I can't belie.
Speaker 3: Leave this.
Speaker 1: I have two slams at the same time. If it's
Speaker 1: a dunk contest, then you can do whatever the fuck
Speaker 1: you want.
Speaker 2: Right But I'm saying in the game, you have one
Speaker 2: ball in hand and that's this podcast, and you can
Speaker 2: still dunk this down. And I'm sorry about the whole
Speaker 2: TV thing.
Speaker 1: And listen, man, we have opposite day. This is our
Speaker 1: ticket out of this dump. All right, you're right man,
Speaker 1: this so let's all settle down. I know it sucks
Speaker 1: right now is the worst because you just got the news,
Speaker 1: but we have this golden ticket. We move forward. We're
Speaker 1: fucking jedis right now. You ever thought about that we
Speaker 1: could turn things down one day when we sell this thing.
Speaker 4: I can't wait to get to a place where I
Speaker 4: can just turn things down.
Speaker 2: I can't wait to say no to everything and just
Speaker 2: be in my place with lots of sunlight and plants.
Speaker 4: You gotta do something, you know what, no opposite day?
Speaker 3: Fuck it right, we got this. This is a home run,
Speaker 3: it's a can't miss. Let's do this thing.
Speaker 1: This is what we got. So let's go to the
Speaker 1: next section. Okay, So during a game of dodgeball, Chucky
Speaker 1: got hit the head and it reflected out perfect. Yes.
Speaker 1: Then he woke up in his bedroom later that night,
Speaker 1: and that's where we pick it up.
Speaker 4: Excellent, great work, Mark, and I'm gonna take the script.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna shove it down there, fucking throats.
Speaker 1: Let's go back on board with the pod. Here we go.
Speaker 4: Interior Chucky's bedroom night. Chucky blinks his eyes awake. He
Speaker 4: reaches for his glasses, but they're not where there usually are.
Speaker 4: Then he realizes that he can see perfect without them. Puzzling,
Speaker 4: he looks around his room. It's filled with plants and trees.
Speaker 4: He knows he's inside his bedroom. But this feels like
Speaker 4: he's actually outside in the backyard.
Speaker 1: That's strange.
Speaker 4: Interior kitchen. Moments later, Chucky sits at the kitchen table
Speaker 4: and his mom walks in backwards.
Speaker 1: Mom, what are you doing? Just walking into the kitchen
Speaker 1: to get breakfast? Time for breakfast? But it's nighttime, of
Speaker 1: course it is.
Speaker 2: When else would we eat breakfast?
Speaker 1: Where's dad? If it's nighttime, he must be done with
Speaker 1: his rout, his route, his bus route. He never works
Speaker 1: at night. Sweetheart, did you get hit on the head?
Speaker 1: Your dad is the president of the United States.
Speaker 2: Huh of America.
Speaker 4: A realization falls over Chucky. He jumps to look outside.
Speaker 4: He tries to run, but his body turns him around
Speaker 4: so that he's walking backwards, just like his mom. He
Speaker 4: opens the curtains, which means he's actually closing them. Confused,
Speaker 4: he peeks outside, which is the new inside in this world.
Speaker 4: He looks outside into the oval office of the White House.
Speaker 4: His dad is sitting at a desk, slamming down phones,
Speaker 4: then picking them back up and yelling into them. No way, Russia,
Speaker 4: let's work together, England, get me my morning bourbon.
Speaker 3: Interior kitchen.
Speaker 4: Chucky turns to his mom, it's opposite day.
Speaker 2: I think you mean regular night.
Speaker 1: Huh huh? What what? Sorry?
Speaker 2: No need to sorry me. I haven't done anything to
Speaker 2: be sorried for. Okay, did you not hear me?
Speaker 1: Wait? If it's opposite day, then sorry means thank you,
Speaker 1: and a hum means okay. That must mean okay means huh.
Speaker 1: So if I want a glass of milk, I have
Speaker 1: to say.
Speaker 3: Chucky turns to his mom and tries out the new rules.
Speaker 1: NOI tat kal lamb moom non tanauton siad sUAS knock
Speaker 1: new evit ke loocket. What the fuck did you do?
Speaker 2: What is this?
Speaker 1: He's talking backwards.
Speaker 3: That's not opposite day, that's backwards day.
Speaker 1: Oh oh my god.
Speaker 2: He did it all the way through this entirewards from
Speaker 2: here on out.
Speaker 1: This is opposite day. Let's all what what is the
Speaker 1: fucking problem?
Speaker 4: You know how bad I need this thing right now? Okay,
Speaker 4: this is the last thing I have on earth.
Speaker 1: Let's settle down. This is going perfectly. He woke up.
Speaker 1: It's now opposite day, so everything is opposite.
Speaker 4: This is opposite Disney's opposite day is all I have
Speaker 4: on this entire.
Speaker 1: Okay, this is the message of opposite day. If you
Speaker 1: have nothing left on earth, you have everything.
Speaker 3: I will fucking string us.
Speaker 2: As your friend. I just want to step in here.
Speaker 2: Maybe Mark got a little carried away, but there's a
Speaker 2: lot of good stuff in here. I mean, the dad
Speaker 2: becomes president. That's fun. That is good, Brendan, I didn't
Speaker 2: get carried away. I know you're depending on this in
Speaker 2: light of Josh Dad's dad taking a role, but I
Speaker 2: have no doubt your guys are going to make this great.
Speaker 2: And we'll get it to Duck and let Duck do
Speaker 2: what Duck do.
Speaker 1: Shit.
Speaker 2: I just got a text from Duck. Yeah, just says fuck,
Speaker 2: I'll murder you.
Speaker 3: What did you do?
Speaker 1: I butt dialed a dick pic? So what what?
Speaker 2: He knows? It was for his mom?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 3: How did he?
Speaker 1: Because she's in the photo. That's better than dick dialing
Speaker 1: a butt pick?
Speaker 2: I get that too, really, Yeah, the widow Huxley is
Speaker 2: into some wild picks. She's been in a loveless marriage
Speaker 2: for so long. She's just wanting to really spread her wings.
Speaker 1: And you dick dial the butt pick? Where do you
Speaker 1: keep your phone? The inner pocket of my cargo briefs
Speaker 1: cargo breefs.
Speaker 2: Yeah, look at this picture.
Speaker 4: Wow, whoa you have an abnormally long butt crack?
Speaker 1: Your butt and that butt crack is the longest one
Speaker 1: anybody's ever seen.
Speaker 4: Party or spine.
Speaker 1: Yikes, where does it stop?
Speaker 2: She likes it?
Speaker 4: And that's insane.
Speaker 2: Fuck you guys, give me that go bald of, give
Speaker 2: me that the fun I fucking fucked up Duck doesn't
Speaker 2: dig that. I dick Duck's mom. Okay, so fuck it?
Speaker 1: What what are you trying? I'm saying I fucked it
Speaker 1: with Duck. I fucked up my butt. Dick picked Duck. Gentlemen,
Speaker 1: we are here at our darkest hour.
Speaker 3: We need this podcast more than anything.
Speaker 2: Baby Starland bb BB Starland is here to tell you
Speaker 2: that we have to come together one cause.
Speaker 3: This podcast at guy, fucking don't ruin this for me.
Speaker 2: Okay, this is good news. I guess all back in
Speaker 2: the saddle. I mean, I've always been on the script.
Speaker 2: I honestly, from the moment that we talked about it,
Speaker 2: I knew that this was the this was the golden
Speaker 2: chariot that was going to take us there anyway.
Speaker 1: Hey, and everybody's name is still on it. That's right, right, perfect,
Speaker 1: Let's dive back in. You're right, I don't need all that.
Speaker 4: We're all going to be drowning in friggin money from
Speaker 4: this thing.
Speaker 1: Here we go, Here we go. Okay, I went ahead
Speaker 1: with Opposite Day. Yes, and I hope this lands because
Speaker 1: it ends the only way that makes any sense to me.
Speaker 1: And it's clear as day how it should end, right, Okay,
Speaker 1: and I hope you guys can see it the way
Speaker 1: I see it. So let's jump in. Okay, here we go,
Speaker 1: page ninety one. Okay, ninety one, Let's get there.
Speaker 4: This is going to be great interior and exterior nowhere
Speaker 4: and everywhere, day and night. Our hero, formerly known as Chucky,
Speaker 4: is now simply infinite consciousness, which is unmanifest and only
Speaker 4: exists as pure potential.
Speaker 1: Out What is this? Keep its opposite day? What is it?
Speaker 1: The opposite of God? It's opposite of everything?
Speaker 2: What does that mean?
Speaker 1: So this is again I'm painting by numbers, guys. The
Speaker 1: entire universe has collapsed into Opposite Day. Chucky isn't the
Speaker 1: main character. He's one of several supporting characters. He can
Speaker 1: only remember what's about to happen. He can't remember the past.
Speaker 1: He's he's remembering the future. There is no present moment.
Speaker 1: He's walking around with a sort of psychic amnesia. So
Speaker 1: I just want to set the tone for you. That's
Speaker 1: that's the scene.
Speaker 2: Well why are there no words.
Speaker 1: Because silence is how you communicate. Now, that's the opposite
Speaker 1: of speaking is silence. So violence is love? Up is
Speaker 1: down isn't? Is is Josh Gadd's dad is Josh Gadd.
Speaker 1: It would be great for this, by the way.
Speaker 3: So hey, fuck dad, he was a dork and now
Speaker 3: he's cool.
Speaker 1: That's the movie. It's so easy, dude, that's what the
Speaker 1: opposite day is. So you're confusing the rules of opposite day. Okay,
Speaker 1: if it's opposite day, as you should know, then everything
Speaker 1: becomes opposite. You have to walk backwards. Words are backwards.
Speaker 1: If you'd want to make a statement like what is happening?
Speaker 1: What isn't what? What is the opposite of what that is?
Speaker 1: Was that was not happening? So that's how you talk
Speaker 1: an opposite day.
Speaker 2: Just make the kid realize that being a genius is cool.
Speaker 4: Yeah, the girl likes him. Everything's going his way, so
Speaker 4: he thinks, but guess what, man, It turns.
Speaker 3: Out he really likes how he was All the time.
Speaker 1: Do you understand the rules of opposite day?
Speaker 3: I'm speaking about the rule.
Speaker 1: You have to know the rules in order to fucking
Speaker 1: understand the movie. The statement its opposite day is both
Speaker 1: true and false. The only way it is opposite day
Speaker 1: is if it isn't.
Speaker 3: Why the fuck are you doing this?
Speaker 1: Man?
Speaker 3: This was the easiest thing on earth. But the bottom
Speaker 3: line is you boothed it. Oh, I did it.
Speaker 1: It's all on the page. There's nothing on the page.
Speaker 1: Let me say, because they're speaking to each other, there
Speaker 1: is dialogue. Therefore, on opposite day there is no dialogue.
Speaker 1: Do you see how it fucking connects in a simple way? Okay,
Speaker 1: let me answer your question. Why don't you make him
Speaker 1: he's a genius, he's cool. Well, on opposite day, everybody
Speaker 1: is a genius and everything you didn't know on regular
Speaker 1: days becomes stuff you do know. Cut the tape, but
Speaker 1: now you don't know anything that you used to know.
Speaker 1: Why am I having to spell this out? Brendon? Are
Speaker 1: you a pass?
Speaker 3: A pard?
Speaker 1: Panna pass?
Speaker 3: The hardest pass?
Speaker 1: There's no pass? This is the script.
Speaker 3: Oh does pass means I want it? Then I I
Speaker 3: want it? Then whatever the opposite fucking is of doing
Speaker 3: this thing.
Speaker 1: I want it? How do you not see this? This
Speaker 1: was the easiest movie to write. It just unfolded out
Speaker 1: of me. And you know what, it actually made me
Speaker 1: realize this movie shouldn't even exist at all all, but
Speaker 1: it does. That's the glory of opposite Day. That's the message.
Speaker 1: We want to fuck you guys. Fuck you guys. I'm
Speaker 1: writing Ora Boros. Oh I am, and I'm gonna self
Speaker 1: produce it for seven thousand dollars. He's not supposed to say.
Speaker 2: We had one rule, and that was that we would
Speaker 2: never talk about Roboris on this podcast.
Speaker 1: Well fuck it, you guys are changing the rules. You're
Speaker 1: leaving the podcast.
Speaker 3: Maybe I'm gonna.
Speaker 2: Into the podcast.
Speaker 1: Well I'm so fuck you guys.
Speaker 4: Cut the tape, just stop it.
Speaker 1: We've come to an agreement. We all need to continue
Speaker 1: doing this podcast and anything but I will make Ora Boros.
Speaker 1: I will never mention it again.
Speaker 2: For those listening, Roboris is a screenplay Mark's been talking
Speaker 2: about ever since we met, and.
Speaker 4: First time he pitched it to me, I was awake
Speaker 4: for a week and a waking nightmare.
Speaker 1: I got. I got physically sick. It might have been
Speaker 1: something that you ate.
Speaker 2: Orl Boros gave me COVID.
Speaker 3: It's the worst idea I've ever heard, but we agree.
Speaker 1: I am dark, I'm gonna fucking mark this microphone your head.
Speaker 3: Go ahead and never mention it again.
Speaker 4: Is going to make it, and we will continue the
Speaker 4: podcast together until then.
Speaker 1: It is lights camera action but for writing.