Speaker 1: Are you are listening to the Rosenthal and jessel Nick
Speaker 1: Vanity Project, or, as I like to call it, the
Speaker 1: biggest mistake of Anthony's career, Like why are you yelling? Ah?
Speaker 1: Welcome aboard, this is happening the Vanity Project. It's our
Speaker 1: first show. Thank you for listening. It's really our second
Speaker 1: show because we tried to tape a video show Anthony
Speaker 1: about six seven weeks ago. In the NFL was not
Speaker 1: really a big fan of it. They were not on board.
Speaker 1: We didn't just try it. We did it, you know,
Speaker 1: we did it. We did it the best we could.
Speaker 1: And I think the note that came back was I
Speaker 1: did not laugh. Yeah, that that was one. No laughter.
Speaker 1: I laughed, I heard some I could. I heard some
Speaker 1: good feedback, but from the NFL no laughter. Another quote
Speaker 1: was I hated it. That was one. So that the project,
Speaker 1: the project was a little dead on arrival for a
Speaker 1: little a little bit, but we got it back now
Speaker 1: an audio form and we're gonna try to do this
Speaker 1: every week. We're like audio form. You know, they said that.
Speaker 1: I think a lot of people the NFL just thought
Speaker 1: I wasn't good looking enough to really carry a TV show.
Speaker 1: Uh So, Yeah, now we're here on radio, and I've
Speaker 1: got a great I've got a great voice, I've got
Speaker 1: great tones coming out of me. Why yeah, why would
Speaker 1: they want you on their airwaves? I I think, I think, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, we've got the title the Vanity Project, but
Speaker 1: now you're already messing it up right off the bat,
Speaker 1: like it's the Rosenthal and Justly Nick Vanity project. We
Speaker 1: have to stick to it. What did I say? You
Speaker 1: said the Vanity Project. Well, that's like shortening it. But
Speaker 1: it's like shortening it the wrong WAYF you called it
Speaker 1: the Rosenthal and Justly Nick, that would make sense to me. Well,
Speaker 1: either way, it's it's kind of the way the the NFL,
Speaker 1: I guess is looking at it from my perspective, you know,
Speaker 1: from my thing. I I if you're not familiar with me,
Speaker 1: if you're a fan of Anthony, I'm a writer at
Speaker 1: NFL dot Com, NFL Media. I've been here for three
Speaker 1: or four years, which if you are going to be
Speaker 1: a writer, it's like the it's like the top level
Speaker 1: you can be as far as you know, it's like
Speaker 1: NFL network. Uh kind of editor slash writer. And then
Speaker 1: right below that, I would say novelist, you know, but
Speaker 1: you're you're killing it, killing it after I I did
Speaker 1: what eight or nine years before that, Pro Football Talk
Speaker 1: NBC Sports dot Com. You, of course, you're a famous comedian.
Speaker 1: You've had your own show, The Jessel Knick Offensive on
Speaker 1: Comedy Central. You were just the host of Last Comics Standing.
Speaker 1: Don't bring that up over a gun on NBC. Why
Speaker 1: not bring that up? You did a great job. I
Speaker 1: did a great job. I was just unhappy with the
Speaker 1: final product, you know what I mean. It's like if
Speaker 1: we did this, if we did this at the end,
Speaker 1: they were like, oh, hey, great job, guys, but we
Speaker 1: edited out all the jokes and put it on the
Speaker 1: air with your name on it. That's what Last Comic
Speaker 1: Standing was. Well, that that is pretty much what's gonna
Speaker 1: happen here. That's I feel like the subtext of the
Speaker 1: entire show is that you're gonna try to get me fired,
Speaker 1: that you're we're going to talk about subjects and it's
Speaker 1: gonna get edited out, and then you're gonna end up
Speaker 1: getting angry or booted off doing this in the first day.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I have bitten every single hand it's ever
Speaker 1: fed me. Even if you're not even trying to feed me.
Speaker 1: You know, if I just see a hand, I try
Speaker 1: to bite it. Um, it happens to me a lot
Speaker 1: in the bathroom. They didn't even want this title, by
Speaker 1: the way. No, they fought us in the title. They
Speaker 1: said the title was kind of too cocky, The Vanity Project.
Speaker 1: And you're like, have you ever seen Anthony Justin do anything? Yeah,
Speaker 1: they were saying it was too negative, like this is
Speaker 1: like the nicest thing that anyone's ever said about you,
Speaker 1: The Vanity Project. Well, let's really let's talk about why
Speaker 1: we have the show, Greg, because I mean, they know
Speaker 1: who we are, they know who you are than who
Speaker 1: we are, but they don't know why we have a
Speaker 1: show together. Like, why would I ever want to do this?
Speaker 1: Why would I ever take time out of my schedule
Speaker 1: to be a part of something like this. Why don't
Speaker 1: you explain? Well, it's yeah, it's a bad career move,
Speaker 1: but you're doing it because we're friends. Going back to college,
Speaker 1: were best friends. We're best friends. Controversial decision at my wedding, Um,
Speaker 1: you know, well we'll get into that some other time,
Speaker 1: but we are we are best friends and we have
Speaker 1: been since uh freshman year of college at two Lane. Um.
Speaker 1: We we met. We we were in the same fraternity
Speaker 1: at two Lane. We both moved out here together in
Speaker 1: Los Angeles when we graduated from college. We also spent
Speaker 1: the summer out here before that. You know, we've kind
Speaker 1: of lived out here at the same time. We've lived
Speaker 1: in New York at the same time. And this is
Speaker 1: our chance to do something cool together, something creative. This
Speaker 1: is your chance to do something cool period. You wanted
Speaker 1: to do it. I wanted to do it. I wanted
Speaker 1: to do it. I wanted to do something like when
Speaker 1: I don't when I'm on podcast, you know, I never
Speaker 1: have to care that much because I'm a guest. Usually
Speaker 1: I can just get that read East and ellis one yes.
Speaker 1: But now that I'm doing this with you, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: put in just as much effort, Like this will be
Speaker 1: no different. So I kind of like just watching you scorm.
Speaker 1: I'm not squirming. I mean I I look at it
Speaker 1: as a chance of two friends. You get a chance.
Speaker 1: How many chances in life are you gonna get to
Speaker 1: do something with your friend that that could be cool,
Speaker 1: creative and that people alike. Well, the NFL network as
Speaker 1: any say, probably zero, probably no chances. So let's let's
Speaker 1: get to some We're gonna talk football on this show.
Speaker 1: We're gonna talk full comedy, football, comedy, friendship, entertainment. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we're gonna talk about our friendship. How about children, what's
Speaker 1: going on in life? Yeah, you're the godfather uh to
Speaker 1: my daughter and and my son. Don't forget about him. Well,
Speaker 1: you boys have to remind you, you know, well you
Speaker 1: decided to choose him. Um, you know I had asked
Speaker 1: you to be my god uh father to my daughter
Speaker 1: a long time ago, and then you you said it
Speaker 1: would be unfair to come over and not give my
Speaker 1: son Walker presence as well. Exactly I spoiled like your
Speaker 1: daughter just turned four years old, and tell him what
Speaker 1: I gave her for for for fourth birthday? What did
Speaker 1: you give her? Now? I remember I gave her. I
Speaker 1: gave her sapphire studded hair Oh my gosh, sapphire studded hairclips,
Speaker 1: which she responded to with I already have a hairclip.
Speaker 1: And then I gave her a diamond necklace which your
Speaker 1: wife will not let her wear. Well, you went, you
Speaker 1: went to the Emmy Sweets gift and sweets before and
Speaker 1: you wouldn't have gone out and bought her hundred dollar
Speaker 1: you know, hundreds of dollars worth of diamonds. It would
Speaker 1: have been like a smash and grab type of thing.
Speaker 1: We're just gone into a case and just gone buck
Speaker 1: while until I came out with stuff. But you happened
Speaker 1: to the birthday party was on the same day that
Speaker 1: you went to this Emmy gift being sweet and then
Speaker 1: just bam, I just went to places and I was like,
Speaker 1: give me something for a four year old girl, and
Speaker 1: I like that. We don't really do that. We actually
Speaker 1: give these to celebrities so they can wear them, and
Speaker 1: I said, give it to him, and you thought you
Speaker 1: were being a hero, but ultimately I just put them away.
Speaker 1: I was like, this, these are not you know, appropriate
Speaker 1: gifts for four year old. She's just gonna eat them
Speaker 1: or throw them away. But I'll give it back to her,
Speaker 1: you know, when she's eighteen or something. Yeah, you guys
Speaker 1: acted like I gave her naked pictures of myself. So
Speaker 1: what have you been up to lately? Anthony? You it's
Speaker 1: been a big week for you. Your Netflix special came out.
Speaker 1: Thoughts and Prayers just came out on Friday. It's been
Speaker 1: very well received. Article in the New York Times today,
Speaker 1: I was gonna bring that up. I mean, this is
Speaker 1: that that has to be the first article ever written
Speaker 1: about you in the New York Times, I think, I mean,
Speaker 1: you've been probably mentioned before, but this was basically a
Speaker 1: think piece about you. Yeah. It was about like how
Speaker 1: how political correctness isn't ruining my comedy. It helps it,
Speaker 1: you know, because I kind of go against that, and
Speaker 1: every way it was. It was a great article. Was
Speaker 1: an honor to have and mentioned. And I just finished
Speaker 1: a tour. I was on tour with Oddball Festival UH
Speaker 1: for the last eight weeks, and actually I had a
Speaker 1: great I had a football running on Sunday I finished that.
Speaker 1: We finished the tour in Dallas, Dallas, Texas, and I
Speaker 1: got to meet Tony Romo. Tony Romo, Yes, I got
Speaker 1: to be perfect. I got to meet Tony Romo. And
Speaker 1: I'll say this before I tell the story. I like
Speaker 1: Tony Romo as much as I can like a cowboy.
Speaker 1: Does that make sense? Like I'm a Steelers guy. You
Speaker 1: know that. I don't really like other players. I don't
Speaker 1: play fantasy because I don't have to root for anyone else.
Speaker 1: But I like Tony Romo. He seems a good guy
Speaker 1: kind I have Red Sox fans felt about Derek Jeter
Speaker 1: for the most part, They're like, well, you know, yeah,
Speaker 1: they respect the way he plays the game. You know,
Speaker 1: he seems like a cool guy. If he played on
Speaker 1: my team, I'd be like, oh, he's my favorite, but
Speaker 1: he's not. Um. So, I get to the show and
Speaker 1: they're like, Oh, Tony Romo is gonna be here. Tony Romo,
Speaker 1: I guess was in the movie train Wreck with Amy Schumer,
Speaker 1: which I saw, but I don't remember him in it,
Speaker 1: but I guess he's in it. I didn't see Tony
Speaker 1: Romo and that he I think he must have done
Speaker 1: a quick cameo or something. Was he in that scene
Speaker 1: with my r of Albert the worst scene in any
Speaker 1: movie ever? I love that. I love that scene. You're
Speaker 1: wrong about that. It's a great movie and that's the
Speaker 1: one of the worst scenes. Marv's one of the best
Speaker 1: act one of the unknown um acting talents of this century.
Speaker 1: Marv Albert, Well, you know what, I agree to disagree,
Speaker 1: all right. So I get them like Tony rom was
Speaker 1: gonna be there, and I'm like, Okay, I'm not that excited,
Speaker 1: but I'm like all right, whatever. That just means like
Speaker 1: more celebrities backstage, so I'm kind of wondering. I'm trying
Speaker 1: to avoid them. And in my in my dressing room,
Speaker 1: I have like a rider where I have alcohol in
Speaker 1: the there's a bottle of tequila, bottle of vodka. Tonight,
Speaker 1: I'm drinking vodka. At the end of the tour, I've
Speaker 1: got I have pulled myself a drinking. I'm wandering around
Speaker 1: and the tour manager comes up to me and he's
Speaker 1: got a little concerned. As I goes, Anthony, we might
Speaker 1: have to get you another bottle of vodka. I say, why,
Speaker 1: what does that mean? Because I mean, this is my bottle.
Speaker 1: It's in my contract, like something bad has happened if
Speaker 1: it's not there anymore. I like that it's in your contract.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, everyone has. Everyone's gotta ride or something. Backstage.
Speaker 1: Mine is mostly full of booze, maybe a pizza, some
Speaker 1: turkey sandwiches, And they say the the vodka has gone.
Speaker 1: Tony Romo took your vodka. Wow. Now you know, I'm
Speaker 1: not a violent person, but I get angry pretty quick.
Speaker 1: And I immediately become furious because I imagined Tony Romo
Speaker 1: walking into my dressing room, a room with my name
Speaker 1: on the door, walking and taking my bottle of vodka
Speaker 1: and leaving, and I'm furious. I'm like, where is he?
Speaker 1: Show him to me right now. He might have seen
Speaker 1: you ahead of time and been like, this guy thinks
Speaker 1: he's the best looking guy here. He sees you as
Speaker 1: a threat. I mean, I'm sure he sees me, but
Speaker 1: I think he probably just saw me walking around was like,
Speaker 1: that looks tasty. I want it what that guy's having.
Speaker 1: You know, a lot of people look at me and
Speaker 1: they think, what's he doing? How can I copy it?
Speaker 1: But I'm ticked him, like where is he? And they go, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: Tony didn't take it. They say Amy gave it to him.
Speaker 1: He said, could you have any vodka? She's like, does
Speaker 1: Amy Schumer? And in Amy's defense, I had just told
Speaker 1: her that earlier in the day, I threw up in
Speaker 1: a Starbucks. That's how hungover I was. Threw up in
Speaker 1: a Starbucks at three in the afternoon. So I don't
Speaker 1: need that vodka. But it's still mine, you know. So
Speaker 1: I'm a little annoyed. I'm a little bit I'm gonna
Speaker 1: let it go. I'm gonna let it go, but I'm
Speaker 1: still kind of ticked about Tony Romo drinking my vodka.
Speaker 1: He's having fun backstage. All of the crew they are
Speaker 1: all Seahawks fans and they're furious they just lost that
Speaker 1: game and they hate Tony Romo and they're like, antone,
Speaker 1: keep with we took your vodka, and I do you
Speaker 1: mean to get him out of the backstage? You mean
Speaker 1: to clear him out? So right before I go on stage,
Speaker 1: they walk up and then like Tony, you gotta you
Speaker 1: gotta get out of He's like looking at them like,
Speaker 1: I'm Tony Romo. Don't they go It's for performers, and
Speaker 1: they just like, with as much disrespect as they can
Speaker 1: push him with this add He's still kind of smiling,
Speaker 1: and I'm about to walk out. The crew says Anthony,
Speaker 1: will be really funny if at the end of your
Speaker 1: set you say the cowboys all right, and this is
Speaker 1: fifteen thousand people in Dallas on a Sunday night. I
Speaker 1: go out and I kill I have a great set.
Speaker 1: At the end, I'm like and then the crowd's going
Speaker 1: crazy for me. And so my final night of the tour.
Speaker 1: So Lizabeon, thank you so much, Dallas, the cowboys, and
Speaker 1: I turned and and the crowd just immediately goes from
Speaker 1: cheering to booze, like thunderbous booze. And I turned to
Speaker 1: walk around. I go to hand the mike to what
Speaker 1: I think is gonna be Jeff Ross. Jeff Ross has
Speaker 1: been hosting the tour, and said, Tony Romo walks out
Speaker 1: and takes the mic from me like he's going to
Speaker 1: introduce Amy, and he's kind of smiling, but he's also like,
Speaker 1: I heard full of what you said. So I just go, oh,
Speaker 1: I know you. You're the who took my vodka. And
Speaker 1: then I handed the mic in front of fifteen thou people,
Speaker 1: and I thought about dropping the mic on the ground.
Speaker 1: That would have been amazing. It would have been amazing,
Speaker 1: but also been not been as classy as just yelling
Speaker 1: the cowboys. And so that's what I think of when
Speaker 1: I think of you, when I think of this entire story,
Speaker 1: I come out with it that class. Yeah, you can
Speaker 1: picture me wearing a tuxedo as I tell it. But
Speaker 1: then I walked backstage and the entire crew was looking
Speaker 1: at me like they just saw a ghosts like we can't.
Speaker 1: We were joking, we said yeah, the Cowboys to all
Speaker 1: of these people. But I am a hero now to
Speaker 1: that entire crew. And in Tony Romo's defense, afterward, he
Speaker 1: came up to me, we talked. He was very nice,
Speaker 1: he was very complimentary. But when he went out on stage,
Speaker 1: he takes the mic and he's like, Hey, every in
Speaker 1: the place is going nuts. They love Tony Rome. When
Speaker 1: he goes, I don't know who that guy was, but
Speaker 1: I think he said some some pretty inexcusable things about
Speaker 1: the Cowboys, and the crowd is kind of like, what
Speaker 1: like an excuse? Okay, He's like, how about we never
Speaker 1: invite him back to Dallas ever again? Huh? And I'm
Speaker 1: just sitting backstage, like, right, Tony, you're gonna ban me.
Speaker 1: I don't think so. Tony Romo has that kind of power.
Speaker 1: He really does. They use a god in uh in Dallas.
Speaker 1: They loved him, so he loved him. You're not really
Speaker 1: missing much and not going back to Dallas. I like Dallas.
Speaker 1: That that that story made me think a couple of things.
Speaker 1: First of all, Tony Romo he should be a hero
Speaker 1: to Seahawks fans for what he did dropping the extra
Speaker 1: point in the two thousand seven Playoffs. Great moment for Seattle.
Speaker 1: Jeff Ross was Tony. Jeff Ross was gonna bring him
Speaker 1: out and roast him before he introduced Amy, and everyone
Speaker 1: was so excited than Tony was like, no, don't roast me.
Speaker 1: But when after he introduced Amy, Ross came out and
Speaker 1: he goes, oh, sorry, guys, Tony Romo just fell and
Speaker 1: got injured himself backstage again crazy. I also want to know, like,
Speaker 1: what what led to the Starbucks Starbucks puking? I mean,
Speaker 1: like had described that moment in terms of the different
Speaker 1: low moments of your life. Where where does that rank.
Speaker 1: I've seen you puke in some like ugly places, so
Speaker 1: I guess maybe it doesn't rank that high. No, it's
Speaker 1: pretty empair. I mean the fact that it was like
Speaker 1: four in the afternoon and I just eatn like oatmeal
Speaker 1: and a cup of coffee. That was tough. But whenever
Speaker 1: I go to Austin, Austin, Texas, what does it to me.
Speaker 1: I'm not a bit I'm not like a crazy drinker.
Speaker 1: But I enjoy my too. I enjoy hurting myself in
Speaker 1: certain ways. But yeah, Austin two nights in Austin, Texas,
Speaker 1: I will be throwing up in a in a coffee
Speaker 1: house the next day. But I did make it to
Speaker 1: a bathroom, which is everyone's first question, because if you
Speaker 1: throw up in a bathroom Starbucks, it's way better than
Speaker 1: throwing up in the middle of a Starbucks. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: like one of the cleanest places you could be a
Speaker 1: Starbucks night and day. Let's uh, let's go through some headlines,
Speaker 1: shall we? Should we go through the stories of the day,
Speaker 1: don't you don't. I don't know if we can top
Speaker 1: that story each show would be nice if like, yeah,
Speaker 1: this is a show about sports and comedy, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean? If I could tell another professional athlete
Speaker 1: themselves every week, that's pretty amazing about it. Um, But
Speaker 1: why don't we go through some of the headline You
Speaker 1: go through the headlines, I'll jump in if I feel
Speaker 1: like it. If not, I've got my phones. I can
Speaker 1: just kind of scroll through some things. Cameron Heyward been
Speaker 1: in the news this week, my boys, steel You're of
Speaker 1: course a big Steelers fan, big Steeler fan. I loved Ironhood.
Speaker 1: I loved his dad because he played for pitt Yeah,
Speaker 1: and he played for the Saints. We of course they're
Speaker 1: kind of closet Saints fans. At least, I am a
Speaker 1: little bit adopted. Yeah, they're mind like my second favorite team. Ah.
Speaker 1: He got in trouble this week, of course, fined by
Speaker 1: the NFL for wearing his eye black the iron Head
Speaker 1: on it, you know, honoring his father. It's express cancer month,
Speaker 1: but he just wanted to honor his father who he lost,
Speaker 1: and he did it for a second straight week, even
Speaker 1: after or uh he was fined. Um, it turns out
Speaker 1: the NFL and him worked out some sort of agreement.
Speaker 1: I don't know if they reduced the fines or who knows.
Speaker 1: Maybe they agreed to donate something to a certain charity
Speaker 1: they have. They've dropped, dropped the issue. What happen? The
Speaker 1: NFL is in the right here. I mean, I understand
Speaker 1: why they're doing it. I understand. I mean I think
Speaker 1: that the best way you can honor your father is
Speaker 1: by writing his nickname on your face for a little,
Speaker 1: for a couple of hours a week. You know, that's
Speaker 1: you can't really mess with that. I think it would
Speaker 1: be funny if he got like the iron Head eye
Speaker 1: black just tattooed on his face, and then what would
Speaker 1: they do? Yeah, they couldn't do anything about it. Or
Speaker 1: they might just go back and say edited for content. Ah,
Speaker 1: did I go too far? That joke's not gonna make it.
Speaker 1: That's not gonna make it. They're just gonna cut that.
Speaker 1: Maybe not I was thinking of. I was thinking of,
Speaker 1: like when I initially saw you were in the New
Speaker 1: York Times today, I was thinking of immediately emailing that too.
Speaker 1: Um the particular Shadowy League figure that said he didn't
Speaker 1: laugh at our show, that he hated our show the
Speaker 1: first time, And I was gonna be like, just let
Speaker 1: us have the title that we want. They have. This
Speaker 1: guy has an article in the New York Times. But
Speaker 1: then I was looking and in the third paragraph of
Speaker 1: the article, it basically mentions all the different types of
Speaker 1: joke that you had, and it said something like molestation. Uh,
Speaker 1: cancer was one of them. What else did they have?
Speaker 1: Pretty much all the greatest hits, all the bad ones.
Speaker 1: They could add breast cancer. That would be good to
Speaker 1: add the um the other headline this week, I don't
Speaker 1: know how to get out of that. Donuts, Donuts, Donut Time,
Speaker 1: what they called the donut Party. The Minnesota Vikings have
Speaker 1: a donut club which they get together every Saturday morning,
Speaker 1: very early in the morning in the morning, well at
Speaker 1: seven fifty in the morning, the Minnesota Vikings have an
Speaker 1: unveiling of the donuts, but you can't touch them for
Speaker 1: the first ten minutes, which seems ridiculously childish. I don't
Speaker 1: think so. I think that was like the part that
Speaker 1: made sense to me was that they make everybody like
Speaker 1: when I heard When I first heard about the story,
Speaker 1: I first I thought, like, people are gonna get mad
Speaker 1: at them, you know, like if this this is the Vike,
Speaker 1: but it was the Steelers. Because I just heard Donut Party,
Speaker 1: I'm like, are you telling me the entire team wakes
Speaker 1: up like three hours before they have to on a
Speaker 1: Saturday morning, eats as many donuts as they can. Because
Speaker 1: that's what it sounded like. That's not that's not great
Speaker 1: athletic behavior. Well not only that, but Jared Allen, who
Speaker 1: was featured in the piece of Former Viking, had the
Speaker 1: right idea that one of the they had many rules
Speaker 1: of donut club, and including don't talk about donut club,
Speaker 1: but that's been blown out of the water with this article.
Speaker 1: One of them was you have to show up on time.
Speaker 1: There's no one shows up late. But Jared Allen got
Speaker 1: around it. By he would pay for the donuts. Every week.
Speaker 1: It's strolling an hour and a half or two hours
Speaker 1: later when they actually had to be there. He seemed
Speaker 1: like he knew what he was talking about. I mean
Speaker 1: they're talking, they're acting like donuts are some sort of contraband,
Speaker 1: like the like the toughest thing that you could smuggle
Speaker 1: in that you have to take a look at it
Speaker 1: for ten minutes. And it's only three dozen donuts. It's
Speaker 1: not that many. I mean, I don't know what donuts cost,
Speaker 1: but it can't be it can't be that much. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but it does sound like a bad idea. It's not healthy.
Speaker 1: If they were like getting together eating kale or like
Speaker 1: protein shakes Saturday morning, I can put your J. J.
Speaker 1: Watt like knocking down three dozen donuts. They had shirts,
Speaker 1: I know, so they get together every Saturday morning. They
Speaker 1: all have the donuts. It's a special team bonding thing.
Speaker 1: One thing I thought immediately was like, they're not doing this.
Speaker 1: The Miami Dolphins aren't doing this, you know, the New
Speaker 1: York Giants aren't doing this because there's something to do
Speaker 1: in New York or Miami, Like this would only happen
Speaker 1: in in with multimillionaire athletes living in Minnesota. Well only
Speaker 1: once voting season is over, that's smoot. When I first
Speaker 1: heard about this, I thought it sounded like fraternity hazing,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? It sounds like like the
Speaker 1: what do they call it, the Cracker game, which we
Speaker 1: don't have to go define, but I think people will
Speaker 1: know what the Cracker game is. Um. It sounded like
Speaker 1: a gross what the Cracker game is. And we were
Speaker 1: in a fraternity, but we never had to using with
Speaker 1: the Cracker game, have to do something like that, I
Speaker 1: I find do you find like I don't usually volunteer
Speaker 1: the information that I was in a fraternity. I'm embarrassed
Speaker 1: by it. We weren't very fraternity games, like we we
Speaker 1: like we pledged as freshman and went through all the
Speaker 1: hell of like hazing, and then once we got in,
Speaker 1: we were like, this is stupid. Why did we do
Speaker 1: all this? And we never really showed up much after that.
Speaker 1: We weren't really good fraternity members now, and they didn't
Speaker 1: Two lanes different because it's just kind of like you
Speaker 1: go out into bar. You know, you can go to
Speaker 1: bars when you're eighteen. No one's really living in the
Speaker 1: fraternity house. In particular, like three or four people are,
Speaker 1: but not that the whole fraternity. It's just kind of
Speaker 1: like a a party thing. But even then I'm embarrassed.
Speaker 1: And then the one we were in was the most lazy,
Speaker 1: like young fraternity ever. Yeah. I just remember having to
Speaker 1: do a lot of push ups. Remember once having to
Speaker 1: like hang from a statue in the middle of Audubon
Speaker 1: Park and put a giant bra on like Lady Justice
Speaker 1: while you guys all ran laps around the fountain. What
Speaker 1: you remember. This was like four in the morning. It
Speaker 1: was a rough that was it was hell weak. I
Speaker 1: don't remember anything. And then for the most part I remember.
Speaker 1: I remember the crab oil was used. That was kind
Speaker 1: of scarring. I didn't have to mess with that because
Speaker 1: I was I was pretty. I was so lazy and
Speaker 1: I had to mess that. I got to leave early
Speaker 1: every day to go work my job cold calling high
Speaker 1: school students. That's what I did, but that was not
Speaker 1: good at One thing that you know, listeners would definitely
Speaker 1: not know about me, but you know about me is
Speaker 1: that I have the worst memory of anyone I've ever known.
Speaker 1: And one reason why I like to keep you around,
Speaker 1: other than you know your celebrity. And uh, the exorbitant
Speaker 1: gifts that you give to my kids are that you
Speaker 1: remember things about my past, my college experience, you know,
Speaker 1: time in New York, really anything to do with the
Speaker 1: last ten years. When you can tell me about it,
Speaker 1: it's like hearing in the story for the first time.
Speaker 1: It's like awakenings. Yeah, I once reminded you about your wedding?
Speaker 1: What about it? Just did it happen now? And I also,
Speaker 1: I mean, I think I get deserve more credit than that.
Speaker 1: I think that I think I'm responsible for your entire
Speaker 1: sports wedding career. How do you figure? Okay, you want
Speaker 1: me to break it down. Okay, we lived in l
Speaker 1: A together. What were you doing when you first got
Speaker 1: to l A. I was actually holding the job that
Speaker 1: you could have had, or should have had initially were
Speaker 1: slated to have. I was an assistant at a movie
Speaker 1: action company, UM Hallway Pictures that had a deal with
Speaker 1: Warner Brothers. We just kind of geared towards making African American, uh,
Speaker 1: you know style movies. Information you should have been like,
Speaker 1: I was an assistance. I like the details. Cut everything
Speaker 1: Greg said and just put in you weren't assistant, Greg
Speaker 1: and so I and I told you. I was like,
Speaker 1: you should be a sports writer, Greg, reach of your dreams,
Speaker 1: start a blog online and start writing sports stories every day.
Speaker 1: And you did that. And then I bought you a
Speaker 1: Peter gammon'sobble head doll, which I think was the inspiration
Speaker 1: for you to really take that next step and leave
Speaker 1: Los Angeles and become a professional sports writer. And now
Speaker 1: here we are, well, you know, your whole bit is
Speaker 1: you know sarcasm, right, So I'm not even sure if
Speaker 1: you really did tell me to start writing in a
Speaker 1: sports blog that actually sounds told you to do that,
Speaker 1: because I did do that. Yeah, I started writing a
Speaker 1: baseball blog while I was in Los Angeles, and then
Speaker 1: I got really tired of doing various assistant jobs and
Speaker 1: I was a page at NBC and other stuff and
Speaker 1: got sick of it and then left l A. I could,
Speaker 1: I could say that your entire career is at least
Speaker 1: partially that I'm responsible for it. How did how did
Speaker 1: you make ends meet? When we were out here? I
Speaker 1: gave you like every job that you ever got, and
Speaker 1: you got fired from half of them. I had a job.
Speaker 1: I had a job at NBC Productions, and I was
Speaker 1: kind of an assistant to a producer there as well,
Speaker 1: and she would have you know, jobs and shows. I
Speaker 1: think you worked as an accounting clerk at American Dreams.
Speaker 1: I believe was I got you that job? You got
Speaker 1: fired from that? No, I got laid off the end
Speaker 1: of the season. I didn't get fired. And then the
Speaker 1: woman had re hired me on Deadwood, and then she
Speaker 1: rehired me on the unit when I stabbed turned the
Speaker 1: back ms literally it literally, stabbing her in the back
Speaker 1: would have been more pleasant than what I actually did
Speaker 1: to her. Well, now I want to know what you
Speaker 1: did there. Not to get too far off topic, because
Speaker 1: that story about the the email my accent, we'll tell
Speaker 1: another episode. We'll see if the NFL lets us keep going.
Speaker 1: Maybe during the playoffs, I'll tell that story. Well, part
Speaker 1: of my whole pitch was like, this is gonna be
Speaker 1: really real. You know what I mean? This is these
Speaker 1: are two friends, um that have us friends best friends,
Speaker 1: that have a genuine relationship that's actually written to the
Speaker 1: contract that I have to say that each time Anthony insists.
Speaker 1: And I think one thing that you've got to think about, Anthony,
Speaker 1: is if that's how it is, how real you're really
Speaker 1: comfortable getting you know what I mean, Listen, I don't
Speaker 1: think about things, Greg, I know about them because your
Speaker 1: whole bit on stage, I mean, it's not a bit
Speaker 1: if you used to if you use the word stick
Speaker 1: right now, I'm leaving. Whose my mind cut that? Please? Uh?
Speaker 1: You know you I wouldn't you know? What would you?
Speaker 1: How it would people describe you on stage? It's kind
Speaker 1: of woudn't say it's a character, but it's an amped
Speaker 1: up version of yourself in real life. You're a You're
Speaker 1: a pretty nice guy. I'm much nicer than I am
Speaker 1: on stage. I would just go on stage, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'm like Darth Vader had and the Devil had a baby,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, that sort of thing. But
Speaker 1: off stage, I'm just like, slightly slightly, I'm I'm pretty
Speaker 1: much only nice to you and your immediate family. But
Speaker 1: that's enough. Can you're really nice to us? Yeah? You
Speaker 1: used to be nice to some members of your family,
Speaker 1: maybe maybe less less of now your brother. I guess
Speaker 1: i'd throw that. That's what I'm trying to get in
Speaker 1: in here, is that you know, if we're gonna do this,
Speaker 1: you know you have to be comfortable, they're getting really real.
Speaker 1: I'm I'm happy to get real. I just feel like
Speaker 1: the sole responsibility of being real is on me. I
Speaker 1: feel like you couldn't be real, you know, on the
Speaker 1: real world. That's how unreal you are, that's how fake
Speaker 1: you are as a person, and that if the responsibility
Speaker 1: of being real is on me, then I get to
Speaker 1: dole out how we do it. I'm not going to
Speaker 1: tell all of my stories. It's not okay what you
Speaker 1: just said right now. We're best friends, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean, That's what happens. So I guess we can
Speaker 1: each claim responsibility for each other's career. Were an one,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. I looked at you and
Speaker 1: I was like, how do I not end up like that?
Speaker 1: I mean, what what can I do? I was living
Speaker 1: my dream pretty early. I got a job at Rhoda
Speaker 1: World and was was loving it pretty early. I went
Speaker 1: to a lot of give me a break. I went
Speaker 1: to a lot of your lousy um early stand up sets.
Speaker 1: You were great from the beginning, and I and I
Speaker 1: thought you were going to do big things right away
Speaker 1: because I saw all the no talent hacks that were
Speaker 1: around you that I was forced in anyone that lives
Speaker 1: in Los Angeles inevitably has some sort of stand up
Speaker 1: friend or something where they have to go to a
Speaker 1: lot of these shows. And it's the most painful thing
Speaker 1: ever because I would, I mean, it was a regular
Speaker 1: part of my life to go to you know, these
Speaker 1: stand up shows where it was you one or two
Speaker 1: pretty funny people and like seven people where you could
Speaker 1: not be less comfortable watching them perform. I felt bad
Speaker 1: if you, guys, you would have to come to that
Speaker 1: because they called bringer shows. We have to like bring
Speaker 1: five friends to watch you. So not only that, I
Speaker 1: am I making guys watch these hold people. You're seeing
Speaker 1: me do the exact same jokes at every single night
Speaker 1: that was. I do owe you a debt for that.
Speaker 1: Except were you with the first show I ever did?
Speaker 1: I don't think so you weren't. I don't know. Did
Speaker 1: I have an option ie with the every once in
Speaker 1: a while, like to just kind of give you something
Speaker 1: that lets you know you don't have me all the way?
Speaker 1: You know, I just want to, you know, keeps you
Speaker 1: wanting more. Fred Jackson this week, do you know a
Speaker 1: team he's on? Now? Back the headlines? Why not? Let's
Speaker 1: do it? I mean, we'll keep talking. Uh Fred Jackson
Speaker 1: this week? Do you know what team he's on now?
Speaker 1: He's on the Seattle Seaks. I don't want to test you.
Speaker 1: You're a pretty big NFL fan. Just for people listening
Speaker 1: to this, Anthony's not one of these um people you
Speaker 1: see on television that says they're a fan just to
Speaker 1: kind of like that that's going to get them in
Speaker 1: with the male demo or something. I mean, you're a
Speaker 1: pretty hardcore sports fan watching Sports Center every night that
Speaker 1: I'm not really worried about my placement in the mid demo.
Speaker 1: I think I got it. I got it nailed out. Uh.
Speaker 1: But but you know, I am a fan. I'm a
Speaker 1: diehard Steelers, but I followed the rest of the league.
Speaker 1: You know, I know what's up. Um, Fred Jackson got
Speaker 1: into a big car crash. Fred Jackson has been one
Speaker 1: of my favorite players. I wouldn't even say a big
Speaker 1: car crash when he hit a street sign, but it
Speaker 1: was played up like it was a big story initially
Speaker 1: on TMZ and that proved to be, uh, factually wrong.
Speaker 1: We never had any of that on NFL Network. But
Speaker 1: he but he did get into an accident. Um initially
Speaker 1: it was said that Marshawn Lynch was there and they
Speaker 1: were drag racing. He was not drag racing. He just
Speaker 1: showed up afterwards, uh, and was seeing you know, it
Speaker 1: was on his way out of the out of work,
Speaker 1: and he was seeing that his teammate was all right.
Speaker 1: He was all right, there's no charges, there's no nothing.
Speaker 1: Seahawks Backfield's gonna be fine. Um. But did you when
Speaker 1: you heard that they were drag racings? Did you believe it?
Speaker 1: Because I believed because it was on TMZ. But it's
Speaker 1: still but TMZ they get things right sometimes. Like it's
Speaker 1: like those guys have such nice cars, like Marshawn Lynch
Speaker 1: has a Lamborghini in his driveway that uh, I met
Speaker 1: a guy on this tour who he says he's from
Speaker 1: Seattle and he's the same driver as Marshawn Lynch. This
Speaker 1: guy picks up Marshaw on every like whenever Marshawn needs
Speaker 1: to arrive for something, whether they're going to games or
Speaker 1: going going on the road whatever, he says, he pulls
Speaker 1: into Marshawn's drive when it's a really small driveway, big house,
Speaker 1: small driveway, and he's got a Lamborghini, a brand new
Speaker 1: Lamborghini in the front, sitting there, and whenever the guy
Speaker 1: pulls in to pick up Marshawn, Marshawn comes out, puts
Speaker 1: his luggage in the guy's car, and then so the
Speaker 1: guy can turn around in the driveway, he walks up,
Speaker 1: picks up the front of the Lamborghini with his hands,
Speaker 1: lifts it up like Arnold Schwarzenegger in Twins turning off
Speaker 1: a car alarm, and then moves it over a few
Speaker 1: inches so the guy can back up and move around. Superhero,
Speaker 1: Could you imagine lifting up your car every time someone
Speaker 1: had to turn around your driveway? Like amazing. It sounds
Speaker 1: like a car I want, But it doesn't sound like
Speaker 1: a guy who would race his team might have to practice, Like, Hey,
Speaker 1: I'll race you to that street sign. Whoever hits it
Speaker 1: first wins. I could see those idiots doing that, Fred Jackson,
Speaker 1: it's not an idiot. Maybe Lynch, I don't know. They
Speaker 1: both seemed crazy. Um, What's what else do we want
Speaker 1: to talk about? How about how about NFL network? Um
Speaker 1: really kick started a story this week and I was
Speaker 1: there when it happened, at least when it got on air.
Speaker 1: And you know this whole hubbub happened that I don't
Speaker 1: know if you saw this, that that briefly the NFL
Speaker 1: network UM showed some nudity during the show last Sunday
Speaker 1: for an interview where Albert Brier was interviewing Adam Pacman
Speaker 1: Jones formerly Pacman Jones in the Bengals locker room. But
Speaker 1: in the background there was a bunch of Bengals guys
Speaker 1: and you know, they briefly showed some nudity and uh,
Speaker 1: you know, the players or the the analysts afterwards cracked
Speaker 1: up a little bit about it. You know, it was
Speaker 1: clearly embarrassed. It was never shown again. The NFL network
Speaker 1: eventually apologized about it, but it's become a real story
Speaker 1: because the Bengals complained, you know, one of their players
Speaker 1: that was pictured nude UM was really upset and offended
Speaker 1: by in the NFL. LPA president Eric Winston, who's also
Speaker 1: on the Bengals UH says this is an issue for them.
Speaker 1: It's been an issue for a while that they don't
Speaker 1: that that that nudity having to be naked in front
Speaker 1: of players is like is a problem, which totally makes
Speaker 1: sense to me. Said, and what other workplace are we
Speaker 1: gonna have to be do you have to be naked
Speaker 1: in front of it? It's not about being guy girl
Speaker 1: sports writers there anything like what other things like we
Speaker 1: need to have more time and there is a ten
Speaker 1: minute cooling off period where they get to change and everything,
Speaker 1: but it's not enough time because you've got to play,
Speaker 1: you know, the coach is given a big speech and
Speaker 1: you've gotta shower and all that, and that they want
Speaker 1: to come up with the situation so that this never
Speaker 1: happens and that they never have to have you know,
Speaker 1: their wang in front of America again, or any of
Speaker 1: the sports writers. I feel like this is like a
Speaker 1: really passive aggressive way for you to tell me to
Speaker 1: put close on right now. I feel like the reason
Speaker 1: we do a podcast so I can wear whatever I
Speaker 1: want and this is how uncomfortable. Um, but yeah, I
Speaker 1: think there's a lot of ways that the NFL can
Speaker 1: deal with this. One of course, bathing suits for every
Speaker 1: player you wanted all times. Another thing is body paints,
Speaker 1: body paint, ritual body paints. That would be good. You
Speaker 1: can see them naked, but you don't really know what's
Speaker 1: going on. That feels like it would be more time consuming,
Speaker 1: you know, like who would be putting on the bat
Speaker 1: the body paint like before the game, Heyward Hayward would
Speaker 1: paint them up, put put his put his dad's initials
Speaker 1: all over the players bodies spram down. Um no, I
Speaker 1: think that would be. That would be very like Zaki
Speaker 1: wearing a bikini or was he naked? You don't know,
Speaker 1: it's body paints. Um, I believe the King. I always
Speaker 1: I always thought the body paint thing was a little
Speaker 1: I don't know. It's like people that got really excited
Speaker 1: about the sports Illustrated some body paint issue, Like I
Speaker 1: get it, but it's like there's porn everywhere. Plus they
Speaker 1: look even better in just the bathing it's still like
Speaker 1: airbrush like I would like, wouldn't you that the bathing
Speaker 1: suit like that? That's great? That was great. I mean
Speaker 1: at a certain pointed because Greg wasn't funny. Is any
Speaker 1: of this gonna be on the show eventually? Brandon? Are
Speaker 1: we just talking to ourselves at this point? I don't
Speaker 1: see why any of it will get cut. Okay, none
Speaker 1: of it seems too much. Well, we'll see what happens. Alright.
Speaker 1: It's not my favorite, so one of our things if
Speaker 1: it works. You know, one thing you know, just speaking
Speaker 1: to the listeners, and please give us feedback, give me feedback,
Speaker 1: give Greg. Yeah, Anthony, I'm not going to check your feedback.
Speaker 1: I don't need to know. You're very un social media
Speaker 1: friendly or just unfriendly in general. Yeah, I kind of
Speaker 1: ignore if you if you if you like, if you
Speaker 1: take the compliments, you also have to take the insults.
Speaker 1: And I don't care about there that criticism. You know.
Speaker 1: I I perform publicly, like live, so the audience tells
Speaker 1: me what I need to know. I don't need some
Speaker 1: I don't need some fourteen year old in Iowa tweeting
Speaker 1: at me that he didn't like my last joke, whether
Speaker 1: he doesn't think this podcast is funny enough or that
Speaker 1: that you should be replaced. You know. I don't want
Speaker 1: I don't want to be reading things like that. But
Speaker 1: you can, you can. You can tweet Greg and I
Speaker 1: love it. That was one thing, you know, and that
Speaker 1: Anthony came up with in the NFL, and NFL was
Speaker 1: considering that have someone play for this podcast, like just
Speaker 1: have a guy that was like, hey, it's Anthony's longtime friend,
Speaker 1: but with more personality, maybe like five or six inches taller,
Speaker 1: you know, ability to roll with the punches, come up
Speaker 1: with some jokes a little better. Who are they going
Speaker 1: to get for that? I don't know, Fred Savage, I
Speaker 1: get a lot on Twitter speaking of which, really I
Speaker 1: know Fred. I worked for Fred once. Really Yeah, he
Speaker 1: directed the Garflonus episode I was on. Edited to keep
Speaker 1: Greg's job, just truined to take that out. Um. What
Speaker 1: I was trying to get to was, you know, I
Speaker 1: want this is an evolving show. The title could change, right.
Speaker 1: It was Originally it was gonna be, uh, the Anthony,
Speaker 1: Greg and Anthony Show, because Anthony insisted that his name
Speaker 1: be first and last. Um. Eventually that got overruled. Uh,
Speaker 1: the network didn't really like it was gonna be the
Speaker 1: Greg and Anthony Vanity Project. But they didn't really like that.
Speaker 1: They wanted Jesselnik to be in there because they think
Speaker 1: just America is going to iTunes and randomly searching. Not
Speaker 1: just America. I think it's international now, So we went
Speaker 1: with that. So that could change. And what what I'm
Speaker 1: trying to get to is it's a pretty free flowing podcast, clearly, Um,
Speaker 1: but we might you know, want to come up with
Speaker 1: some weekly segments. Sure we could do that. And if
Speaker 1: you guys have things you want to know, you want
Speaker 1: to hear us talk about, you want to ask us questions,
Speaker 1: feel free to uh, feel free to do that and
Speaker 1: Greg will take a look at him. So I did
Speaker 1: throughout some questions this week. Uh, it was a little
Speaker 1: or asked for some questions on Twitter. It was a
Speaker 1: little last minute. What's least minute? Greg, Well, we've been
Speaker 1: planning this for quite some time. What what time do
Speaker 1: you send out the things we have? And we were
Speaker 1: on the phone last night, for instance, for a while
Speaker 1: when you said last minute, do you mean like a
Speaker 1: couple of days ago when I send out like you know,
Speaker 1: we were sending out emails. Frankly, I've done more preparation
Speaker 1: for this than just about anything else. Um, a couple
Speaker 1: hours before before the show didn't get great. It didn't
Speaker 1: get a ton of response, It didn't get great responses. Uh.
Speaker 1: How many followers do you have on Twitter? I've got
Speaker 1: over a hundred for sure. Uh, yeah, over one fifteen
Speaker 1: or so, over a thousand. There you go, look at that,
Speaker 1: A breaking digits just from our friendship. That's great. Please,
Speaker 1: now it's gonna really explode. I don't I wish I
Speaker 1: could follow you on Twitter my best friend, but I can't. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was a little disappointed with you and some of
Speaker 1: your you know, high Acdane and celebrity friends once followed me,
Speaker 1: but then they got sick of my They've got sick
Speaker 1: of my football analysis. I get it. Yeah, you don't
Speaker 1: want to hear about good analysis Buccaneers offensive line or whatever.
Speaker 1: So please send us, send us more questions next time.
Speaker 1: Tell us tell us what you think of the show. Um,
Speaker 1: but I do got a couple of them, so uh
Speaker 1: edited for content, Let's go to uh Eric. The last
Speaker 1: name was a little confused Laren Laryen tebby Laren to
Speaker 1: be would you trust leaving your daughter or god daughter? Um?
Speaker 1: I added that, uh, you know, in your case with
Speaker 1: Ben Roethlisberger as a babysitter, will you go first? You
Speaker 1: go first? Okay, I'm happy that I'm happy to leading
Speaker 1: this first of all, since it's a god daughter's situation.
Speaker 1: Nice and I love, I adore your god daughter. But
Speaker 1: I would leave her with just about anybody. I don't
Speaker 1: think I'm really legally responsible for what would happen. So,
Speaker 1: and I think that Ben has turned what I call
Speaker 1: the Jesus corner. You know, when like players getting so
Speaker 1: much trouble, they just start saying Jesus in every interview
Speaker 1: they give, and then it like means they're forgiven and
Speaker 1: it's okay after that. Ben's in super Jesus territory right now.
Speaker 1: He makes uh he makes some name. Yeah, he makes
Speaker 1: Russell Wilson look like the guy from the Exorcist. Uh So,
Speaker 1: I'm I would trust Ben with just about anybody edited
Speaker 1: to keep your interest. Sure, would you be afraid that
Speaker 1: he would throw your daughter for three fifty yards? Because
Speaker 1: that would be pretty wan a pretty big screw up baby.
Speaker 1: Sitting wise, who was the player in the NFL that
Speaker 1: you would most trust your daughter with? Oh? Wow, that's
Speaker 1: a great question, because I feel like Tom Brady. I
Speaker 1: immediately thought of just because you know, you know, wouldn't
Speaker 1: he wouldn't feed her, She'd starved to death. What do
Speaker 1: you what does that even mean? He's a weird he's
Speaker 1: a weirdo. He eats. Wouldn't give her, he wouldn't give
Speaker 1: her soda. But that's good. You don't want her having soda.
Speaker 1: I give her soda a chance. I got she's grown,
Speaker 1: girl's very against it. Um who else is? Look at
Speaker 1: the very responsible. What about Peyton Manning. No, he's from
Speaker 1: New Orleans. No, you don't want I mean, I love
Speaker 1: I like the Mannings. They're from New Orleans and all that,
Speaker 1: But just I I feel like he hasn't. I don't
Speaker 1: think he's he's the one carrying the fathering load in
Speaker 1: that family? Does he even he does have that? Have
Speaker 1: you ever seen Peyton Manning's wife? No, does anyone know
Speaker 1: that she's I mean she she's out there. I thought
Speaker 1: he was married to that lady who owns Papa John's.
Speaker 1: It's really stretched face right back, that one. You should
Speaker 1: stay on the mic and just laugh the whole time.
Speaker 1: But it's gonna be great, Uh, great for the show.
Speaker 1: So uh, Anthony, you had this idea of how we
Speaker 1: would end each show every week. You wanted to make
Speaker 1: some predictions, and but I'll let you because here's what
Speaker 1: I wanted. I wanted to do, Like Greg and I
Speaker 1: are gonna talk. You're gonna hear are you know us talking?
Speaker 1: It's fun to hear friends discuss things, a lot of
Speaker 1: them football related. But at the end, I want to
Speaker 1: have the kind of a heart out and be able
Speaker 1: to kind of do predictions for what I think is
Speaker 1: going to happen the next week, and it's gonna be
Speaker 1: kind of like a comedy bit where we're gonna try
Speaker 1: it and if it doesn't work, like if if it works,
Speaker 1: you're gonna hear us do the bit. If not, as
Speaker 1: soon as I'm done talking right now, there's gonna be
Speaker 1: a cut and then you're gonna hear us say, well,
Speaker 1: that didn't work, and that will be the end of
Speaker 1: the show. And either way, I think the comedy value
Speaker 1: is is sky high. And you came up when we
Speaker 1: first you know, we're talking about doing this show back
Speaker 1: in the summer. I mean you came up with all
Speaker 1: sorts of crazy ideas, clearly not sober when you came
Speaker 1: up and came up with them at all. Last night though,
Speaker 1: we were just talking that this was a sober idea,
Speaker 1: and uh, and I'm pretty excited for it. I'm really not.
Speaker 1: I'm worried. I'm worried about it. You should be a
Speaker 1: little worried, and I was not so. But we talked
Speaker 1: and then I got less sober and I came up
Speaker 1: with this idea. But here's the idea. It's it's predictions.
Speaker 1: Greg is gonna give me the matchups. I'm not gonna
Speaker 1: tell you who's gonna win. I'm just gonna tell you
Speaker 1: whether or not I believe the matchup is going to
Speaker 1: end up being crunk or funky funky fresh. And if
Speaker 1: you don't know the difference, I don't really have time
Speaker 1: to explain. It's not that long a podcast. But I
Speaker 1: will tell you which one I believe will be. In
Speaker 1: the next week, maybe we'll go back and see if
Speaker 1: I was right. But what is even the difference? You're
Speaker 1: gonna have to find out. But what I told you
Speaker 1: when I told them got my wife this idea that
Speaker 1: she did start dying of laughter. Well, I think because
Speaker 1: you're married or she doesn't get a lot of humor
Speaker 1: in her marriage, so that whenever I can kind of
Speaker 1: step in and uh, you know, take the brunt, she does.
Speaker 1: She is a big jes like fans I want. It
Speaker 1: took me the time to when you're it's taken a
Speaker 1: little bit. You you she warmed up and when you over. Okay,
Speaker 1: let let's go through. Okay, through are some some of
Speaker 1: the big games of the week. Uh, let's really start
Speaker 1: on on the Sunday games. Depending on when people are
Speaker 1: listening to this, um New Orleans at Indie Annapolis, New
Speaker 1: Orleans at Indie in Indianapolis, I'm gonna have to say,
Speaker 1: that's gonna be That's gonna be funky, funky fresh. If
Speaker 1: it was in New Orleans, I would have gone crunk,
Speaker 1: you know. I feel like New Orleans is a great
Speaker 1: crunk field advantage. But if they're gonna be an indie
Speaker 1: Indie coming off that embarrassing loss to the Pats, I
Speaker 1: think it's gonna be a funky, funky fresh game for sure,
Speaker 1: and you can take that to the bank. The Jets
Speaker 1: at the Patriots this weekend. Jets at Patriots, this is
Speaker 1: gonna I wish you would save this till the end,
Speaker 1: but I'm gonna have to go crunky, crunky fresh. Uh.
Speaker 1: It's kind of a mixture of the two. Again, if
Speaker 1: it had been in New York, I would have said funky,
Speaker 1: funky fresh. Going to Foxboro, You're gonna get a little
Speaker 1: crunk in there. You can't not, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: It's kind of just the fox Bow mentality. I think
Speaker 1: the Patriots have a lot to prove in terms of
Speaker 1: how how fresh they are, but not so much how funky. Though.
Speaker 1: I think they've kind of proved their funkiness. So I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say crunky, crunky fresh. I like how you describe
Speaker 1: whether it would be different if it was in New
Speaker 1: York but in New England, because that's when you think
Speaker 1: New England in foxbur you think crunk. M No, you
Speaker 1: know I messed it up. I've ruined the whole thing. No,
Speaker 1: I think it's still going pretty well. Dallas at New
Speaker 1: York Dallas. I mean, that's a big game in the
Speaker 1: NFC Dallas that you New York Tony Robbo won't be
Speaker 1: back for this. You know your buddy still he's still
Speaker 1: drinking my vodka somewhere. Uh, let's see Cowboys in New York.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have to go crunk. That's it. That's it's
Speaker 1: you know, it's it's a coin flip. To be honest.
Speaker 1: I could have said funky, funky fresh and been confident,
Speaker 1: But I'm gonna say crunk. Why would you not be honest?
Speaker 1: I'm I'm being almost too honest. Maybe if I lied,
Speaker 1: then we wouldn't be wouldn't be going through these questions.
Speaker 1: Philadelphia at Carolina, good Sunday night game this week. That's
Speaker 1: a great Sunday Night game. Uh, you know what I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say. The first top is gonna be krunk. The
Speaker 1: first half is gonna be crunk as hell if I could,
Speaker 1: if I'm allowed to talk like that on the on
Speaker 1: the show. Second half a little less crunk, a little
Speaker 1: more funky funky fresh. And then the fourth quarter if
Speaker 1: you're if you're like allergic to funky funky fresh, turn
Speaker 1: the TV off and throw it out the window because
Speaker 1: you're gonna die. So I reminded you wanted to go
Speaker 1: through sixty games of this and I'm kind of cutting
Speaker 1: it off. Last one Monday Night Football, the Baltimore Ravens. Uh.
Speaker 1: I thought they were gonna be a good team, so
Speaker 1: that's why they're in prime time one in five. But
Speaker 1: going to my favorite team other than the Patriots this year,
Speaker 1: the team of the Around the NFL podcast there at
Speaker 1: the Arizona Cardinals. The Arizona Cardinals are coming off that
Speaker 1: lost to the Steelers, which was a beautiful game. Baltimore
Speaker 1: needs this one, so I'm gonna have to say. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say across the board funky funky fresh on this one,
Speaker 1: and I mean, no one else is gonna agree with me.
Speaker 1: I know when the NFL network people are gonna that's
Speaker 1: the saying that you would go funky funky Freshman, that
Speaker 1: it's the most obvious crunk thing of the week. You
Speaker 1: have Arians and the Kangle Hat, you have Carson Palmer,
Speaker 1: you have Tyrone Matthew, you have pet Patrick Peterson, you
Speaker 1: have the whole desert thing. And if that doesn't scream chrunk,
Speaker 1: what screams cronk Anthony? Other games? Give me the give
Speaker 1: me the next sixth team. That's it. That's over. There's
Speaker 1: no way that's making it in is it? That's definitely
Speaker 1: making it. And that was great improvisational gold. You know,
Speaker 1: we brought back funky funky fresh I feel, and you
Speaker 1: know what, let's let's leave it in and the next
Speaker 1: week if I was wrong about any of these, we
Speaker 1: can go back and cut it out. Now here's the question, though,
Speaker 1: what describes it being wrong? Do we have a classification
Speaker 1: for that? It'll be well, it'll be let's not be
Speaker 1: up to Brandon. I was just excited for the game
Speaker 1: that you didn't throw in there. Based on Anthony's love
Speaker 1: of location, going Bills Jaguars in London. Oh okay, well,
Speaker 1: all right, and then you helped the show for the
Speaker 1: first time. There was Great Jaguars in London, Bill's Jaguars
Speaker 1: in London, six thirty in the morning. You have to
Speaker 1: wake up and listen and watch it only on Yahoo
Speaker 1: being streamed internationally, first time ever where you were. That
Speaker 1: is even be the first NFL game that no one watches.
Speaker 1: Chronker funky funky fresh. This is a great chance for
Speaker 1: me to break up my accent. It's gonna be krunk, mate,
Speaker 1: is he would you like a little funky funky fresh love?
Speaker 1: That's the worst thing. That's why they don't have you
Speaker 1: play characters on TV shows. It's just you know, if
Speaker 1: you if you're out of show, you're just playing Anthony Jesslinik. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I know, of course I only played comedians. Is that
Speaker 1: Crocodile Dundee two? Like? What's that? That was? That was?
Speaker 1: That was the Queen of England? That was the Queen?
Speaker 1: All right, Bill's Jags Funky funky fresh, funky funky funky
Speaker 1: fresh fresh. Um, well, who knows, maybe no one even
Speaker 1: heard the rest of that segment. You said that there's
Speaker 1: a chance that we would cut it all out, but
Speaker 1: let's be honest. Once you do three or four minutes
Speaker 1: on anything. You're gonna fall in love with it. We
Speaker 1: would never cut anything. I think this is the best
Speaker 1: part I would I would edit this to make at
Speaker 1: the beginning of the podcast this is the end. Then
Speaker 1: how would you close it? We do need to close it.
Speaker 1: Do you have it? Do you have any um any
Speaker 1: partying words? Because this this really could be the first
Speaker 1: and last UM time we ever do this. It's very possible. Um,
Speaker 1: why don't you end on like a real note? Tell
Speaker 1: me how are how are my godchildren? And how how
Speaker 1: is your daughter and your son? Well? Um Walker has
Speaker 1: been fast