WEBVTT - What Is This? 

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, I'd like to buy a ticket, but before I do,

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<v Speaker 1>could you tell me what the hell this is?

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<v Speaker 2>It's one more thing. I'm strong and getty. I am

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<v Speaker 2>a little hesitant to.

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<v Speaker 1>Poke fun at this because it's probably some very nice

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<v Speaker 1>people and it showed up in my email. I might

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<v Speaker 1>even know these people. I'm going to read it just

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<v Speaker 1>as it is, and then you can explain to me

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<v Speaker 1>what the hell this is. I try elevate your life.

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<v Speaker 1>The Village Heart an evening of authentic connection coming up

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<v Speaker 1>May twenty second, from seven.

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<v Speaker 2>To nine thirty pm. Well that sounds great, does it?

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<v Speaker 2>What is It's it?

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<v Speaker 1>No, there's more, but like starting right there, just even

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<v Speaker 1>seeing that that sounds nice, isn't your first question?

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<v Speaker 2>What is that? What is an evening of authentic connection?

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<v Speaker 2>I can't imagine. It sounds like a secular church service.

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<v Speaker 1>From the poster it is. This is for you if

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<v Speaker 1>you're longing for meaningful interactions and a sense of community,

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<v Speaker 1>make new friends, go beyond the surface, cultivate true belonging.

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<v Speaker 2>Sounds like a really nice pitch for those of us

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<v Speaker 2>who feel isolated by the modern world. That will turn

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<v Speaker 2>into a cult recruitment.

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<v Speaker 1>Because what I'm wondering is like, I get that, yeah, yeah, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I get the modern world isolated blah blah blah, But

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<v Speaker 1>do you.

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<v Speaker 2>Have any idea what's going to happen when you get there?

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<v Speaker 2>At this point? From me post, you'll listen to a

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<v Speaker 2>brief address by our leader Jim, who you will find

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<v Speaker 2>incredibly charismatic. You will end up sexing up your wife

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<v Speaker 2>and your daughters eventually.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, it.

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<v Speaker 2>Seems like the poster should give you a better idea of.

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<v Speaker 1>The slightest inkling as to what's gonna happen when you

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<v Speaker 1>walk in to the door of this place, because I mean,

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<v Speaker 1>at this point on the poster, I would have no idea.

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<v Speaker 3>Are there any images on the poster.

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<v Speaker 1>A man hugging a woman?

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<v Speaker 2>They're both sitting, No, see sitting hug Yeah, awkward, kinky.

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<v Speaker 2>Thirty five dollars. It's thirty five dollars to get in.

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<v Speaker 2>That's the reason. Anyway. You know, that's a good price

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<v Speaker 2>for that value. You don't want overpay for that, right,

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<v Speaker 2>it's a good value.

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<v Speaker 1>You're right, Michael, that's a good value, only thirty five

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<v Speaker 1>dollars for and it's from seven to nine thirty that's

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<v Speaker 1>a good length for this sort of thing.

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<v Speaker 2>Can anybody come up with two reasons why you would

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<v Speaker 2>be unnecessarily vague about something? I can come up with one,

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<v Speaker 2>because if you told people what was actually going on,

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<v Speaker 2>they'd run in the other direction. Can anybody come up

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<v Speaker 2>with a second reason? Probably not.

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<v Speaker 1>So that was the only thing that was in the poster.

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<v Speaker 1>And I actually have seen this poster around town, and

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<v Speaker 1>that was my reaction was, I haven't got the slightest

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<v Speaker 1>idea what this is? Do they expect people to show up,

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<v Speaker 1>pay thirty five dollars and walk in the door with

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<v Speaker 1>no clue? Like is this a craft seminar or a

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<v Speaker 1>religious thing or a dating thing?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, that sounds like they're using the element of like intrigue.

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<v Speaker 2>But luckily, here's here. Can I do my official guess

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<v Speaker 2>or would that not be you? Go ahead? My official

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<v Speaker 2>guess is some sort of non denominational well not for

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<v Speaker 2>thirty five dollars, say, like a church service thing, So

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<v Speaker 2>ry go ahead.

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<v Speaker 1>Luckily on the email version, sorry my moving off. On

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<v Speaker 1>the email version, it had the people behind it, like

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<v Speaker 1>you could email them for questions. And then I did

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<v Speaker 1>a little digging went to their website, so I got

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<v Speaker 1>a little more information. You're invited to join us for

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<v Speaker 1>an evening of heart to heart connection, where we go

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<v Speaker 1>beyond the surface and dive into the essence of our

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<v Speaker 1>shared humanity.

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<v Speaker 3>Newdest colony of recruitment.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, yes, don't see enough wang every day hate ten lines.

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<v Speaker 1>Whether you're seeking to make new friendships, deep in existing relationships,

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<v Speaker 1>or just explore new ways of connecting, the village, Heart

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<v Speaker 1>offers a space for curiosity and exploration. Again nothing but vagaries,

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<v Speaker 1>I mean just okay, so again, gotta just my my

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<v Speaker 1>hands up.

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<v Speaker 2>What am I getting for thirty five dollars? What is

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<v Speaker 2>happening here?

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<v Speaker 1>Here's what you can expect, it says, Okay, good, there

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<v Speaker 1>we go. Guided connection activities. These include moving through the

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<v Speaker 1>space with others, partner exercises, and group activities that encourage

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<v Speaker 1>meaningful interactions. Excuse me, start to listen to a person

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<v Speaker 1>with whooping cough.

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<v Speaker 3>I vote if you button, yeah right, if you go

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<v Speaker 3>walk in coughing and let everybody know I've got whooping cough.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna try to do this paragraph about coughing because

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<v Speaker 2>it's too good. I mean, this is an orgy. It's

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<v Speaker 2>an orgy. Will you figured it out? Michael you're being

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<v Speaker 2>invited to an orgy. This paragraph's unbelievable. Here's what you

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<v Speaker 2>can expect. Damn it, Nope, not gonna happen. I can't

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<v Speaker 2>do it. That takes all the fun out of it.

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<v Speaker 2>Guided it to me?

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<v Speaker 1>Guided connection activities. These include moving through the space with others,

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<v Speaker 1>the space, what space?

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<v Speaker 2>The space, the vaginal space.

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<v Speaker 1>No, I don't think it's I'm sorry, that's weird because

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<v Speaker 1>they looked like it came out of Michaelangelo's mouth.

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<v Speaker 2>That is so How out of character was that? That

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<v Speaker 2>is off brand? What very funny? Sorry for the JC

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<v Speaker 2>bomb folks.

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<v Speaker 1>These include moving through the space with others, partner exercises,

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<v Speaker 1>and group activities that encourage meaningful interactions and new ways

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<v Speaker 1>of relating to one another.

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<v Speaker 2>You told me it does have a bit of a

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<v Speaker 2>diddy field.

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<v Speaker 1>Will yeah, bring your own baby oil again another paragraph.

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<v Speaker 1>We're under the heading of here's what you can expect.

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<v Speaker 1>That told me nothing, not a single thing. I still

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<v Speaker 1>have zero idea what I would get if I walked

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<v Speaker 1>through the door with my thirty five dollars ticket.

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<v Speaker 2>Still waiting to hear that second possible explanation for the

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<v Speaker 2>spectacular vagueness opportunities to explore and stretch comfort zones. Ah, yoga,

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<v Speaker 2>we're talking.

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<v Speaker 1>I've been saying about that's hand Like I nailed it earlier,

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<v Speaker 1>whether you were sharing, listening, or engaging in somatic practices

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<v Speaker 1>somatic of the body, every exercise is an invitation to

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<v Speaker 1>stretch just beyond your comfort zone in a safe and

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<v Speaker 1>supportive environment. That could be this is a freak. I

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<v Speaker 1>don't think it's. Yeah, I mean it is a you're

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<v Speaker 1>gonna be a little uncomfortable with this, but come on,

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<v Speaker 1>think outside.

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<v Speaker 2>The box, relax, breathe deep.

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<v Speaker 1>Each participant is free to choose their level of engagement

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<v Speaker 1>at all times and opt out of any exercise.

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<v Speaker 2>That's what.

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<v Speaker 4>For gods, Oh, this is this is kind of scary.

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<v Speaker 1>If you buy tickets ahead of time, they're twenty five.

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<v Speaker 1>At the door they're thirty. Oh wow, that is a

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<v Speaker 1>real value, Mike. And here's my favorite part. Space is limited?

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<v Speaker 2>Is it? How much space do you need to do

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<v Speaker 2>what you're doing? Which is what I thought that was

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<v Speaker 2>so funny is that the yeah, pretty much.

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<v Speaker 1>There's one more paragraph that I can't read, but yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>space is limited. So they recommend your register Mandarin or

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<v Speaker 1>because of my whooping golf.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh okay, come just as you are. Sorry, Sorry, what

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<v Speaker 2>are you gonna do? It's a dread disease.

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<v Speaker 1>Come just as you are, challenge yourself by choice and

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<v Speaker 1>leave feeling understood, inspired and a part of truly something

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<v Speaker 1>special and sticky.

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<v Speaker 2>And making more income than you ever dreamed possible.

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<v Speaker 1>Or you now on a timeshare, or you've got a

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<v Speaker 1>bunch of tupperware.

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<v Speaker 2>Are you've shaved your head and you're worshiping the gym? Exactly?

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<v Speaker 3>I'm going to drink a potion at the end of

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<v Speaker 3>the event.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, good, all sex, all sex jokes aside.

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<v Speaker 1>I haven't the slightest idea what's gonna happen there if

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<v Speaker 1>you went, I'm.

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<v Speaker 2>Guessing something.

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<v Speaker 1>New agey, spiritual but not religious, for profit that you

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<v Speaker 1>sign up for a dozen classes and buy the equipment.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>I feel like somebody's going to walk into the Remotekay,

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<v Speaker 1>are you ready to begin? And I would say begin.

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<v Speaker 2>What they're not going to tell you till the end.

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<v Speaker 2>It reminds me of I thought I was applying for

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<v Speaker 2>one job between semesters in college, and it was door

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<v Speaker 2>to door vacuum sales.

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<v Speaker 1>And it wasn't like till the last ten minutes of

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<v Speaker 1>a two day training process. Really that they told us

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<v Speaker 1>what the job is and I'm like kidding, goodbye, yeah, wow, yeah, okay.

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<v Speaker 2>And my mom and dad had tried to warn me

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<v Speaker 2>because they could smell it, but they were so clever

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<v Speaker 2>at concealing what we have positions in factory representation, in

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<v Speaker 2>product service andlah blah blah. No, it's just a door

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<v Speaker 2>to doors vacuum sales. It's always a single guy. At

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<v Speaker 2>the time, I should have taken the gig because some

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<v Speaker 2>of my friends who had door to door jobs had

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<v Speaker 2>some interesting encounters with Ford housewives, but I chose to pass.

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<v Speaker 1>Each participant is free to choose their level of engagement

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<v Speaker 1>at all times and opt out of any exercise.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, that one. That one's odd.

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<v Speaker 2>See, I think it's swinging. It certainly could be a

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<v Speaker 2>freak off. I don't think it is, but not hilarious. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>it really is. It is. It's the perfect example of.

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<v Speaker 1>One of those twenty five dollars if you buy the

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<v Speaker 1>digging out thirty five at the door. Space is limited

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<v Speaker 1>right well, because you could only have ten people doing.

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<v Speaker 2>What or fifty or a million?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I almost want to go. I mean unless they're

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<v Speaker 1>going to hold me ostage. I can always leave as

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<v Speaker 1>soon as they figure out what it is.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, you can opt out of if anything makes you

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<v Speaker 2>feel uncomfortable. You'd be worth twenty five bucks until we

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<v Speaker 2>put the manacles on you anyway. Wah.

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<v Speaker 1>I know they snap on a rubber glove and they

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<v Speaker 1>walk over with a big bottle of something, and you're

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<v Speaker 1>ready for.

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<v Speaker 2>Right. You think it's a scientology. I need you to

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<v Speaker 2>get up on this pummel horse. What I did think

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<v Speaker 2>of that once or twice, Michael, something like that, A

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<v Speaker 2>quasi religious organization some sort.

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<v Speaker 1>I think that, Yeah, m maybe it's that. Maybe it

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<v Speaker 1>is how you get people into some sort of weird

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<v Speaker 1>cult thing, people that don't have the ability to like

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<v Speaker 1>read that and say.

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<v Speaker 2>What is this?

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<v Speaker 1>It doesn't say what it is anywhere and to understand

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<v Speaker 1>that that's not intriguing, that's disturbing and a warning, right, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>And they're appealing from the first sentence to people who

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<v Speaker 1>feel disconnected.

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<v Speaker 2>And lonely, right, which is a lot of folks.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, all right, well beware everybody.

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<v Speaker 2>I guess that's it.