Speaker 1: We got a brand new Second Date podcast for you today. Hey,
Speaker 1: it's Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning. And I am
Speaker 1: so curious what people think of this woman's we'll call
Speaker 1: it a life rule. Does that sound of a relationship
Speaker 1: rule that she has? Yeah, it's definitely controversial. I mean,
Speaker 1: I can see the upside and the downside of it,
Speaker 1: you know, and I think she breaks her own rule.
Speaker 1: So yeah, so interesting. That's a really good point. It's
Speaker 1: a really good point. You're gonna understand what we're talking
Speaker 1: about in just a second here, But we always love
Speaker 1: to highlight your comments. Leave them, let us know what
Speaker 1: you think of the show. Thank you so much. And Alexis,
Speaker 1: what do you like today? Yeah, Karen Skander said, I
Speaker 1: used to listen to you guys driving to my college
Speaker 1: classes every day, and four years later, now I have
Speaker 1: my four month old baby girl listening with me. You're
Speaker 1: probably teaching her all the words. Yeah, her first world
Speaker 1: is going to be Second Date Update update. Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 1: That's so sweet. Thank you so much for being here,
Speaker 1: and your brand new Second Date starts right now.
Speaker 2: The Second Date up date. What do you do if
Speaker 2: you're on a date with someone and in the middle,
Speaker 2: you feel like it's going mah, nick, do you a
Speaker 2: order a round of shots to get the party going?
Speaker 1: You know, it really depends on the establishment.
Speaker 2: Option. Be fake like you're choking. So she gives you
Speaker 2: the Heimlick and at least you get some action out
Speaker 2: of it.
Speaker 1: A couple of broken rams too, and a.
Speaker 2: Great story or c have a very honest one on
Speaker 2: one breakdown about how this date is actually going so far.
Speaker 2: I think I took the Heimlich option over that one,
Speaker 2: and I wonder if our listener Tina wishes she had
Speaker 2: done the same. So let's talk to Urtina. Welcome to
Speaker 2: the show.
Speaker 3: Hi, thank you.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. That intro makes it sound like you
Speaker 1: told your date in the middle of it that it
Speaker 1: was going terribly well.
Speaker 2: You send us an email about this person's profile that
Speaker 2: you met on Hinge, and I'm just going to read
Speaker 2: some of the things that you sent from his bio
Speaker 2: before we even get to the story.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm interested.
Speaker 2: So according to this his name is Josh, he's a
Speaker 2: specialist in education. His profile says he's dating with the
Speaker 2: intention of marriage.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, sounds like a stable guy, good.
Speaker 2: Career, and he's into skyscrapers and tropical fruits. Not sure
Speaker 2: why we would need to know that information for this,
Speaker 2: but it's it's nice to be over informed sometimes. So
Speaker 2: you ever put a big apple on the big apple
Speaker 2: this guy would freely out.
Speaker 1: Sounds like if there's a lull in your date, you
Speaker 1: just bring him to a tall building and he's really excited.
Speaker 2: Yes, all right, now we have an idea about who
Speaker 2: Josh is. Clearly you met him on the app. So
Speaker 2: what did you two do for your date?
Speaker 3: We actually went to the dow the zoo Zoo.
Speaker 1: It's a cute date.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we got a couple of waffle combs and we
Speaker 3: just walked around but then animals and just talked a lot.
Speaker 3: All right, that's good, Well he did he talked a lot?
Speaker 2: Oh okay. Does that have anything to do with the
Speaker 2: thing I mentioned earlier about when the date's kind of going?
Speaker 4: Man?
Speaker 3: Yeah, he's the one who asked me.
Speaker 2: Oh, he asked you how the date was going?
Speaker 3: Yes, because I was being kind of quiet and so
Speaker 3: maybe he wasn't sure if I was having fun, so
Speaker 3: he just asked, like, is the date going? Okay?
Speaker 1: Is that the first question he asked you? Because it
Speaker 1: sounds like he was talking.
Speaker 2: Yeah, what did you say?
Speaker 3: I was like, do you want me to be honest?
Speaker 2: I would have been like, no, no, and that would
Speaker 2: have made it fun, right, like lie to me. Anyway.
Speaker 3: What happened, Yeah, because he said yes please, So I
Speaker 3: told him directly, Well, honestly, you're talking a lot.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, good feedback next day, as a person who
Speaker 2: talks a lot, it's good to know that. Well maybe,
Speaker 2: but some people might take that differently. Did Josh seem
Speaker 2: offended by the critique.
Speaker 3: No, he seemed more confused, like as if he didn't
Speaker 3: know he was doing it. But he heard me out
Speaker 3: and then he tried to take constructive criticisms and he
Speaker 3: did a good job of it.
Speaker 1: Oh he did.
Speaker 4: Okay, good, Yeah, okay.
Speaker 3: We hung out for another hour, ended up grabbing drinks
Speaker 3: there because at the Zoom you can buy beer. Yeah,
Speaker 3: and I didn't even know.
Speaker 1: They're offering alcohol at every kid's place these days. Parents
Speaker 1: are just like.
Speaker 2: Them to like slough shots.
Speaker 1: I don't think I think it's just beer and wine typically. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's not like.
Speaker 2: It's just to take the edge off.
Speaker 1: It's not to turn up doing body shots at the zoo.
Speaker 2: Maybe.
Speaker 1: I mean if you bring your own in.
Speaker 2: Okay, maybe a little bit of beer. A little bit
Speaker 2: of alcohol helped make the conversation go a little bit better.
Speaker 3: It actually did.
Speaker 1: Okay, it's just nervous, right, Maybe you're just a strikingly
Speaker 1: beautiful woman and he couldn't think straight, and that's why
Speaker 1: he was talking so much at the beginning.
Speaker 2: You said it, she's not denying that. Well, how did
Speaker 2: you leave things at the very end?
Speaker 4: Well, at the very end.
Speaker 3: We just hugged and said goodbye. But while we were there,
Speaker 3: we worked on like an antelope puzzle and we did
Speaker 3: it together and it was fun, so it was cool.
Speaker 2: So the date actually got better then after you told
Speaker 2: him like he was talking too much.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it actually did. Like, I mean, he's more mindful.
Speaker 3: He asked me questions, he allowed me to be Yeah.
Speaker 1: You did an antelope puzzle. Yeah, I mean it's a date, jeh.
Speaker 2: I mean, I'm sorry you said it just led to
Speaker 2: a hug at the very end. There was no kiss.
Speaker 3: No we text since then, but they've all been pretty short.
Speaker 3: So I feel like now maybe he's overthinking things and
Speaker 3: he's taking what I said too seriously.
Speaker 2: Yeah, totally, he talked too much before and now he's
Speaker 2: not talking enough.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I can see that he's over compensating, or.
Speaker 3: It could be something completely different that I didn't pick
Speaker 3: up on.
Speaker 1: Okay, but you're definitely feeling the vibe like he is
Speaker 1: not responding enough to ask you out again obviously.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because like I'm sending him Freddy text and Ferdy
Speaker 3: picks and he not responded. That never happened.
Speaker 2: She's like Antelope Skyscraper, Guava fruits. Problem is wrong with
Speaker 2: this man?
Speaker 1: Yeah, you said it.
Speaker 2: Je follow me for my sexy Emoji handbook coming later
Speaker 2: on in this winter names. No spoilers, no spoilers. Okay, first,
Speaker 2: we got to finish this second date update. We'll call Josh,
Speaker 2: get some answers, and do it right after this hold
Speaker 2: on Second Date update. I've learned two things so far today, Okay. One,
Speaker 2: you don't think at the zoo.
Speaker 1: Okay, I don't believe you, of all people didn't know that.
Speaker 1: I mean, I feel like you sniff out a beer.
Speaker 2: Wherever it is Zoo frequenter. But look for Brook and
Speaker 2: Jeffries listener Zoo Crawl coming soon. We'll meet you by
Speaker 2: the Baboons for Jaeger Bombs.
Speaker 1: I think It's like, I responsible, you have a beer, Jeff.
Speaker 1: They don't only days Yeah. On Brook and Jeffries listener
Speaker 1: Zoo crawl Less passes out in the bar closures.
Speaker 2: The second thing I've learned is with enough constructive criticism,
Speaker 2: you can change a man. Brooke already knew that. She
Speaker 2: tells me everything.
Speaker 1: It is not worth your energy.
Speaker 2: I said that because our listener Tina was honest on
Speaker 2: her date when Josh asked, how do you think this
Speaker 2: is going with us? And she was polite but said,
Speaker 2: you'd probably be going better if you talked a little less.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, he heard her, you know, like that's the
Speaker 1: amazing thing.
Speaker 2: He's like, oh okay, exactly. Their day actually went pretty
Speaker 2: good after that. He didn't run off and cry near
Speaker 2: the snake cage like most guys would. He actually stuck around,
Speaker 2: had fun. They got drinks, did puzzles. So maybe there's
Speaker 2: another factor playing into all this that we don't know
Speaker 2: about yet. So, Tina, even though he has all these issues,
Speaker 2: why is it that you want us to reach out
Speaker 2: to him today?
Speaker 3: I mean, like, we had fun together and he's like
Speaker 3: a great guy totally.
Speaker 2: Well, the fact that he could adjust and take constructive
Speaker 2: criticism and be mature about it. I think that's a
Speaker 2: big green flag.
Speaker 1: Well, and anybody who's a talker knows that if you
Speaker 1: get nervous, your mouth just doesn't shut up.
Speaker 2: Okay, maybe let's take some of our own advice. There,
Speaker 2: I shut it, and we're gonna call Josh. Let's listen
Speaker 2: to ourselves. I'm dialing Josh's number right now. Hopefully he
Speaker 2: picks up.
Speaker 3: Here we go great, Thank you, guys.
Speaker 2: You're welcome. Hello. Hey is this Josh?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Who's hey Josh?
Speaker 1: Josh?
Speaker 2: Good morning?
Speaker 5: How many parts there?
Speaker 2: What's going on? Yeah, there's there's a lot of us
Speaker 2: in here. Because we're a show. We're called Brooke and
Speaker 2: Jeffrey in the Morning, kind of like a Morning Zoo.
Speaker 5: If you will.
Speaker 1: I worked on a show called The Morning Zoh.
Speaker 2: God supposed to be a joke.
Speaker 3: I know.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: You're on the radio right now, Josh. Uh?
Speaker 1: Okay?
Speaker 2: Why? Why is because we're doing a segment called a
Speaker 2: second Date Update waiting for response.
Speaker 1: It's okay, he doesn't know what it is.
Speaker 2: That's all right. That's a segment we try to help
Speaker 2: out listeners who have gone out with someone and they're
Speaker 2: not getting a call back for a second meet up.
Speaker 2: So that's the case with you and one of our
Speaker 2: listeners named Tina.
Speaker 1: No, you're not letting the pause happen. Well, you're to
Speaker 1: give him a being. You know, he's processing a lot
Speaker 1: right now.
Speaker 2: Don't force it. I'll try it again, Tina. Yeah, Tina,
Speaker 2: I remember Tina. Okay, so I know this is probably
Speaker 2: a lot. I'll just tell you that we spoke to
Speaker 2: Tina before calling you, and she told us about your hangout.
Speaker 2: She mentioned the vibe between you may have changed after
Speaker 2: you asked if everything was going okay in the middle
Speaker 2: of the date.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 1: What did you think about her response?
Speaker 2: Yeah, of her feedback, I mean she used this analogy.
Speaker 5: See she called it the stop light rule.
Speaker 1: Okay, stop light rule when she was talking about how
Speaker 1: you were talking too much.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we're not familiar with that. What is the stop
Speaker 2: light rule? Okay?
Speaker 5: Well she says that when you've been talking for twenty seconds,
Speaker 5: it goes from a green light to a yellow light
Speaker 5: because you've started to talk too long. Twenty seconds, Yeah,
Speaker 5: twenty seconds. And then you said, once you hit forty seconds,
Speaker 5: it's a red light.
Speaker 3: What.
Speaker 2: Ok that's not a general rule. You're saying.
Speaker 5: Yeah, she explained the whole thing to me, and she
Speaker 5: said that I sped past the red light at least
Speaker 5: two to three times, which and I'm like, okay, I
Speaker 5: didn't know that, like there was a traffic.
Speaker 1: Law for I mean, I guess to get to get
Speaker 1: conversation going back and forth, back and forth like that, ping. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm trying to count while you were talking. Just now
Speaker 1: I heard it. I didn't lose it.
Speaker 2: And this is all feedback you're getting on a first date. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I mean we were having.
Speaker 5: Drinks and like got a little bit of my story
Speaker 5: out and she was like, you still have the green,
Speaker 5: but only for another seven or eight seconds.
Speaker 2: She's you're still.
Speaker 1: I thought it was just one example and then they
Speaker 1: moved on from it.
Speaker 2: She's got one of those big speeding guns. She's knocking him.
Speaker 2: I'm counting, keep going.
Speaker 1: You're not talking enough now that would be difficult.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I like the rule, but it's stressful.
Speaker 2: Is that how it felt, Josh?
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean and I felt like I was like
Speaker 5: on like my like driving test.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, when I was sixteen, the.
Speaker 5: Instructor was like speed up, now, slow down, I use
Speaker 5: your blaker merge so I just kind of like lost
Speaker 5: all my confidence.
Speaker 2: She's like, I love the way you parallel park that paragraph. Yeah,
Speaker 2: that was perfect. It's understandable. And you know what, I'm
Speaker 2: going to tell you something here, Josh. I don't think
Speaker 2: Tina meant for it to come across that way. And
Speaker 2: I'm gonna let her tell that to you herself, because
Speaker 2: she is on the other line right now waiting for
Speaker 2: me to hit my red light so you can stop talking.
Speaker 2: And I'm going to give her the green to go,
Speaker 2: So Tina, go ahead. The intersection is yours.
Speaker 3: Josh, my god, Like, you make me sound so horrible
Speaker 3: even listening this whole time. Yeah, and you're making me
Speaker 3: look pretty bad here, Like, well, well, I think.
Speaker 1: He was making you look bad. He was just saying
Speaker 1: it was overwhelming, Tina. It was a lot for him
Speaker 1: to think about.
Speaker 4: What.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, but like, where's the lie?
Speaker 5: Like I didn't say anything that was not true?
Speaker 3: Okay, Well, to be honest, when you were talking to
Speaker 3: the radio, I stopped listening after about like twenty seconds.
Speaker 1: Why are you so offended? You gave him feedback and
Speaker 1: now he's giving you feedback.
Speaker 3: Because he has a tendency to like drone on and on,
Speaker 3: and he actually thanked me in a moment, and like,
Speaker 3: don't forget that, you think, I.
Speaker 5: Like, what do you say to that?
Speaker 3: Did you not ask me to give you honest feedback?
Speaker 5: Okay I did, but like I wasn't expecting you.
Speaker 4: Like accountability, accountability, Like it's not your fault.
Speaker 3: You're a long talker. You just acknowledge it. And the
Speaker 3: goodness is you're trying to get better, and like I
Speaker 3: see the potential in you and it's so great.
Speaker 1: I don't don't think it's a compliment. You think it
Speaker 1: is to tell people you see potential in them. It's
Speaker 1: like you like the person for how they are.
Speaker 2: Now potential in you. Yeah, one day right soon.
Speaker 3: I didn't mean it like that.
Speaker 4: I meant it like he's improving every second and he
Speaker 4: needs me because like clearly, because now it's obvious like
Speaker 4: he hasn't learned his lesson because he is still talking.
Speaker 3: And I also feel like the hosts are not even
Speaker 3: paying full attention.
Speaker 2: That's true. I really don't pay that much attention.
Speaker 5: They're not paying attention, like like I'm sure they are
Speaker 5: because you're being rude and insensitive.
Speaker 2: Like so there, take that advice.
Speaker 3: Oh, I'm always open for getting better, Josh, but if
Speaker 3: it doesn't come with a helpful analogy and a short one,
Speaker 3: then it's kind of lost on me.
Speaker 2: Like actually the stop like things already been taken, so
Speaker 2: you need to find another sort of like commuter thing,
Speaker 2: some bicycle lane.
Speaker 5: Maritime lawship relationships are not supposed to be this hard, especially.
Speaker 3: But this isn't hard. It's a little I told you
Speaker 3: what it was, I explained to you how it works,
Speaker 3: and I'm pointing out when you go too long, So like,
Speaker 3: what's so hard about that?
Speaker 1: It feels like one of those roundabouts where you don't
Speaker 1: know what the third exit.
Speaker 2: I'm going to give everybody the red light here, okay,
Speaker 2: And I'm just going to tell you a little fun
Speaker 2: fact about me is that I am not I am
Speaker 2: not the best talker either, but I think something we
Speaker 2: can all agree on. Even Brooke will back me on.
Speaker 2: This is everybody, all of us here, and every person
Speaker 2: on earth, has areas in their speech they could personally
Speaker 2: improve on.
Speaker 1: Shut up, What does that have to do with him
Speaker 1: thinking she was rused flaws? Okay, there's an easier way
Speaker 1: to say that our speech.
Speaker 5: Yes, I think the twenty second rule is real because
Speaker 5: it gets after that.
Speaker 2: Yeah speech, no more advice is needed, And I just ask,
Speaker 2: would you care to both improve each other's lives immensely
Speaker 2: by going out with one another one more time and
Speaker 2: we'll pay for it.
Speaker 3: I mean I would do it again and do it
Speaker 3: for charity reasons.
Speaker 2: So that's a big yes from Tina is looking to
Speaker 2: work and change you over the next few years. Josh,
Speaker 2: what do you say, will you be her project? I say,
Speaker 2: under like twenty words, I'm going to give you a
Speaker 2: yellow light on this. Yeah, I don't think so.
Speaker 5: I don't want to feel like I'm going to traffic
Speaker 5: court every day for the rest of my life.
Speaker 2: So a big note from me.
Speaker 1: It's interesting most people think traffic court is fun. Well,
Speaker 1: it didn't work out, Tina. It's off. It's so much
Speaker 1: for something.
Speaker 2: Jeffrey in the morning, red Light, green Light, yellow Fatal
Speaker 2: and squid Game and apparently in the dating world too.
Speaker 1: How do you not make that connection earlier?
Speaker 2: True funny probably should have, but maybe we should use
Speaker 2: it on this show. As soon as Brook starts telling
Speaker 2: one of her pathetic, ugly duckling childhood stories where she
Speaker 2: tried to show skin to the mailman and even he
Speaker 2: wouldn't pay any attention to her. Alexis, you're gonna start
Speaker 2: holding up colored cards and when it flashes yellow means
Speaker 2: time to start wrapping the story up.
Speaker 1: I get red carded and you just.
Speaker 2: Long Brook to get We know he left one was
Speaker 2: a little wonky and he wasn't interested. We've heard the stories.
Speaker 1: He was always interested. Job doesn't matter how wonky things are.
Speaker 2: But if you need help in your dating life, like
Speaker 2: Brooke did back in her teenage years, you can always
Speaker 2: email the show. We'll call that person who's not calling
Speaker 2: you back. And go check out all of our Second
Speaker 2: Day podcasts. They're up online where you get yours at
Speaker 2: Brook and Jeffrey