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Speaker 1: This is a headgum podcast.

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Speaker 2: Hi guys, I'm May goodam, and welcome to Thanks Dad.

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Speaker 2: Try to look engaged while I do it.

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Speaker 3: At least, oh I thought I was like good like,

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Speaker 3: I'm like not even here?

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Speaker 1: Made no, no, no, Maybe you can be momplicated. You

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Speaker 1: don't have to. You don't have to.

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Speaker 3: Don't do too much though either, I got you.

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Speaker 2: Okay, don't do too much, just do the right amount. Okay, Hi,

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Speaker 2: I made him, and welcome to Thanks Dad. I was

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Speaker 2: raised by a single mom and don't have a relationship

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Speaker 2: with my dad. I'm not gonna have a relationship with

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Speaker 2: my dad because he actually did go ahead and pass

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Speaker 2: away last year.

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Speaker 1: That sucker, So on this podcast.

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Speaker 3: That's not.

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Speaker 1: Were you not sure if you should Why was it?

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Speaker 1: Why was it whispered?

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Speaker 2: Was it because you weren't sure if you should offer

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Speaker 2: condolences at all? Or you were concerned about interrupting the

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Speaker 2: the intro. You were to concern about interrupting the intro,

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Speaker 2: but you did want to offer your condolences. Do you

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Speaker 2: want to take the time now to say sorry to

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Speaker 2: me about not interrupting the loss of my father?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, no, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, and I'm and I

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Speaker 3: know I would imagine it's made more complicated by your

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Speaker 3: relationship or non relationship with him.

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Speaker 2: It's thank you, you know, it's it's actually the truth

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Speaker 2: is it's so uncomplicated that sometimes I'm like, oh, people

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Speaker 2: are probably.

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Speaker 1: Concerned about how uncomplicated it is.

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Speaker 2: So that makes sense where I you know, I feel,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't you know, I feel very like

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Speaker 2: death this part of life. Yeah, I read that I

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Speaker 2: don't know, seven years ago or something. I go, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 2: and why are we Yeah, so it's okay, but it's okay.

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Speaker 3: I do Yeah, how did you become aware that he passed?

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Speaker 2: My mom told me, and then his cousin, who's my uncle,

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Speaker 2: who i'd know and have known since I was a kid,

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Speaker 2: called me, like I would say, a month after my

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Speaker 2: mom told me what she also found out late, so

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Speaker 2: he probably had been passed at that point for at

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Speaker 2: least I'm going to guess a month.

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Speaker 1: That is my guess. I don't know.

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Speaker 2: And then my uncle was like, oh, you may not

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Speaker 2: feel anything, and I was like, yeah, I don't really

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Speaker 2: thank you for offering that as a I don't know

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Speaker 2: why I feel like thank you. I'm like sort of

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Speaker 2: like thanks, because you make me not feel weird for

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Speaker 2: not feeling anything and not like I'm like associo, you know,

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Speaker 2: because I'm like, yeah, he was like, you may also

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Speaker 2: not feel anything. Yeah, I was at a spa in

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Speaker 2: QC spa on Randall's Island, Randall Lot, Randall's Island in

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Speaker 2: New York. It's I don't know what it stands for.

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Speaker 2: That's I feel like queen something I don't know, but

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Speaker 2: I made that up. I don't actually even I don't know.

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Speaker 2: You could google do the rest of the intro if

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Speaker 2: you if you want quality.

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Speaker 3: Control spat on other circumstances.

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Speaker 1: QC is quality control. By the way, Queen, thank you, Thanks.

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Speaker 2: King again O King. So on this podcast, I'm sitting

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Speaker 2: down with father figures who are old enough to be

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Speaker 2: my dad. How does it feel to be one of

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Speaker 2: the oldest guys ever cast in Saturday Life.

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Speaker 3: There's no way that's true.

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Speaker 2: We were in college at the same time. I think

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Speaker 2: we overlapped at USC. We didn't know each other.

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Speaker 3: What year did you finish?

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Speaker 1: I finished twenty ten? How about you? Two eight oh seven?

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Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, yeah, overlapped, but I wasn't. In the comedy

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Speaker 2: space world. I didn't do any of the things.

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Speaker 3: I know. You've always come from like a different angle,

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Speaker 3: and I've always respected that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, is that ernest? No? Okay?

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Speaker 2: Sitting down with father figuers who are old enough to

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Speaker 2: be my dad or are just dads themselves, Kyle, I'll

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Speaker 2: get to ask questions I've always wanted to ask a dad,

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Speaker 2: like Hey Dad, how do I know if this guy

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Speaker 2: is the one for me? Or Hey Dad, what should

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Speaker 2: I look out for when buying a car? Will you

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Speaker 2: come with me? Or Hey dad, teach me how to

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Speaker 2: change my oil? I think that's something I should know.

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Speaker 2: Or change a tire? Do you know how to change

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Speaker 2: a tire?

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Speaker 1: You looked at me like you looked at me. You

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Speaker 1: nodded so affirmatively, but that I was like, he doesn't know.

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Speaker 3: Supporting you?

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Speaker 1: Okay, but do you know how to change a tire?

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Speaker 3: I can't.

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Speaker 2: Do you know to change oil? I have, okay, but

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Speaker 2: you don't feel confident in your ability?

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Speaker 1: I would.

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Speaker 3: I would maybe need like a YouTube tutorial reminder.

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Speaker 1: Okay, fair enough, it's pretty pretty easy.

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Speaker 3: I remember the dipstick.

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Speaker 2: Everyone knows the dipstick everyone, but I don't know what

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Speaker 2: it means.

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Speaker 1: I don't know how to gauge anything.

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Speaker 2: Okay, anyway, today's guest Guys is a comedian, actor, and director.

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Speaker 2: He's shimmying a little bit for those just listening. You

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Speaker 2: can check out his new movie Y two K later

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Speaker 2: this year. Please welcome My Dad for the Day, Kyle Mooney.

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Speaker 3: Oh so excited to be here.

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Speaker 1: I'm so happy you're here, Kyle.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, he's in the house.

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Speaker 1: Kyle.

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Speaker 3: Do you have to do stuff like.

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Speaker 1: That when they come on?

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Speaker 2: No, you're a first, You're first and excited the most

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Speaker 2: excited to be my dad for the day.

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Speaker 1: I'm a goofy dad today. Yeah, I'm sorry.

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Speaker 3: I need my spectacles. Okay, I'm good.

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Speaker 2: Imagine me with a dad like that.

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Speaker 3: I like change that oil. Who I'm messing with you?

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Speaker 3: Go ahead, let's start.

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Speaker 2: Shut up guy, Okay, but Kyle, what was your dad like?

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Speaker 2: We made a video for your dad wants to celebrate.

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Speaker 1: He was he was being honor.

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Speaker 3: Won a very prestigious award for planning. Yeah, and could

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Speaker 3: have been the APA the American Planning Association. Is that

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Speaker 3: a real association, Yeah, but they're they're other ones. That's

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Speaker 3: just the one.

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Speaker 1: Planning what, by the way, just just for the.

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Speaker 3: Audience, cities, neighborhoods, communities.

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Speaker 1: Okay, great, yeah, yeah, okay, sorry, so.

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Speaker 3: Yes we made but like, yeah, he I was asked to,

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Speaker 3: along with I think some other of his colleagues and

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Speaker 3: my brothers, to make a video to congratulate him. And

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Speaker 3: I made it on in the studio and try to

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Speaker 3: get as many of our castmates in it as well

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Speaker 3: the say congratulations. He he's from Massachusetts and he's very

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Speaker 3: proud of his sort of Cape Cod heritage.

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Speaker 1: Is he would he call himself a masshole?

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Speaker 3: I don't think so. I don't know that he was

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Speaker 3: like loves that term. Okay term okay, but I'll ask him.

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Speaker 3: He yeah, he works as a planner and he for

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Speaker 3: a long time owned his own planning firm. I grew

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Speaker 3: up it was it was Mooney and Associates, sort of

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Speaker 3: a big deal where your father has a company like

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Speaker 3: with their name.

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Speaker 1: For sure.

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Speaker 2: I always think about people who are like, you know,

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Speaker 2: Carnian Sons, and I'm like, do the sons feel so proud,

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Speaker 2: like earnestly like do the sons feel so proud? They're

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Speaker 2: sort of like acknowledged in the title of their their

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Speaker 2: their father's business.

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Speaker 1: But it's Mooney and associates. So that did you feel proud?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it was cool to just see my last name

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Speaker 3: yeh in a somewhat prominent way.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, But yeah, how would I describe describe? I would

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Speaker 3: say he's very he's almost like mayorioal like a mayor.

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Speaker 3: Like he loves to like talk to people, Oh, how

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Speaker 3: are you doing, Brian Mooney? Wonderful? You know. Yeah, And

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Speaker 3: he loves to talk about his work. He loves to

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Speaker 3: talk about the city of San Diego, where he's done

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Speaker 3: most of his work. He's gregarious, he's he's he's he's

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Speaker 3: a proud man.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. And I wouldn't say. He's been incredibly supportive of

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Speaker 3: me in my career. Notably he he purchased a video camera,

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Speaker 3: the Panasonic dv X one hundred B for myself and

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Speaker 3: my friends in college, and and that was like the

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Speaker 3: video camera we used to make all of our internet shorts.

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Speaker 3: So very yeah, very supportive in that regard. I wouldn't say,

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Speaker 3: and he might listen to this, so I feel a

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Speaker 3: little bad, a little nervous saying this. Yeah, I wouldn't

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Speaker 3: say he like is the funniest person on the planet.

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Speaker 3: Like I don't I don't know that him. Like, our

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Speaker 3: senses of humor are the exact same, so he's fully again, yeah,

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Speaker 3: fully cool with mine supportive. Sometimes I think maybe in

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Speaker 3: the past my humor has been a little too awkward.

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Speaker 3: My mother, on the other hand, was a very wacky person,

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Speaker 3: and so it's likely that I got more of that

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Speaker 3: from her. Yeah, but I think those are the main

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Speaker 3: bullet points.

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Speaker 2: On Brian Okay, On Brian Mooney, that is a very

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Speaker 2: memorable name, even the way you like reenacted that, Brian Moone, it.

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Speaker 3: Is Yeah, that is yeah, Brian Mooney, how are you. Yes,

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Speaker 3: we thought uh AGO's podcast was just outstanding in relationship

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Speaker 3: to uh, learning about her her family and where where

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Speaker 3: she's come from and uh and we thought the uh

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Speaker 3: the audition stories we were fantastic. We really really enjoyed it.

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Speaker 1: Oh wow.

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Speaker 2: See that's also that's a very I truly I've never

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Speaker 2: met your dad, and I'm like, I do feel like,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, ah, yes, I understand, I think, I bet,

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Speaker 2: I bet you have the Yeah, I met him at thirty.

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Speaker 3: Rock, probably at an after party or something.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we do meet. We do meet a lot of people.

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Speaker 2: Would would you say that you feel you guys have

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Speaker 2: anything in common really, because if you're like, since it's

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Speaker 2: a humor, don't assarily intersect. Is there are there things

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Speaker 2: that you go like, I definitely got that from my dad.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, we definitely have stuff. Well, we love the Padres.

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Speaker 2: Okay San Diego stand up, which is the dad's Okay,

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Speaker 2: Okay gets dads.

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, this fits the podcast. Okay Daddy.

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Speaker 3: I think I think we're both social people. I think

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Speaker 3: we both like people a lot, and we like to,

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Speaker 3: you know, throw them back around them both.

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Speaker 1: Like a little Bruski is it?

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Speaker 3: Well, he doesn't drink beer anymore because I think it

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Speaker 3: gives him gas.

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Speaker 1: Way to put his business out. You're not worthy of

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Speaker 1: that and.

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Speaker 3: Think I didn't like it when it came out of

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Speaker 3: my mouth.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Eve embarrassed the mayor. He even embarrassed the mayor.

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Speaker 1: Tell people if there.

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Speaker 3: Was somebody recently who like works in his field, who's

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Speaker 3: a younger person, who's who I know through a friend

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Speaker 3: and was like, oh my gosh that my name came

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Speaker 3: up in a Conversation's like, oh is that Brian Mooney

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Speaker 3: is his dad?

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Speaker 1: Right?

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Speaker 3: He's a legend in San Diego planning?

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Speaker 1: Wow? Yeah, how did that feel good?

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Speaker 3: Especially because like I think my father feels that way

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Speaker 3: about himself. So like, yeah, to know that, like no

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Speaker 3: people are really saying this, I think it is special

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Speaker 3: and bringing true to that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah idea.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, So you do feel like you're both gregarious

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Speaker 2: and something you enjoy at least talking to people, engaging

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Speaker 2: with people he was supportive of. So you want to

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Speaker 2: say something you have a thought you look like you

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Speaker 2: were geary.

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Speaker 3: No, yes, I am gregarious, but I also I think

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Speaker 3: you said, like, I'm also shy too, so I'm probably tech.

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Speaker 3: Maybe Okay, in certain social instances I think we are similar.

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Speaker 3: But then I think also I times I can be

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Speaker 3: sort of quiet.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I knew, I know both kinds.

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Speaker 2: I feel like I've seen it and say yeah totally

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Speaker 2: because I feel like I've seen both. When you you know,

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Speaker 2: he bought you this camera and your friends and you

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Speaker 2: shot a lot of your stuff on it, and he

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Speaker 2: was supportive of what you wanted to do and have done.

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Speaker 2: Do you get the sense that at any point he

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Speaker 2: like maybe would have loved for you to get into

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Speaker 2: planning or something and something more serious or No.

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Speaker 3: I think when we were growing up, I'm the youngest

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Speaker 3: of three boys. I have two older brothers.

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Speaker 1: Uh.

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Speaker 3: I think there probably was a hope for him that

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Speaker 3: he could pass the business down to one of his children,

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Speaker 3: but no, I think one of my dad's big things

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Speaker 3: was getting us into sports. It was very important to

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Speaker 3: him that we, you know, learn that which comes with

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Speaker 3: playing in an organized sport like team, working as a team,

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Speaker 3: and that lasted through high school. We were sort of

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Speaker 3: he was kind of constantly He's like, you got to

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Speaker 3: play a sport.

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Speaker 1: Okay, you had to get involved in a sport. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: did you How did you feel about it? Were you like?

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Speaker 1: I don't really feel like.

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Speaker 3: I'm There was one specific maybe more, but at least

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Speaker 3: one specific instance where like I signed up for Pop

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Speaker 3: Warner football. I had a couple of friends who did it,

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Speaker 3: and I thought like, okay, this could be my thing,

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Speaker 3: Maybe I could be good at this. I was like

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Speaker 3: a little bit of a bigger kid and felt like, Okay,

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Speaker 3: I don't know a ton of people doing this, maybe

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Speaker 3: this is something I can be decent at. When I

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Speaker 3: played Pop Warner foot, when I went through the sort

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Speaker 3: of whatever you call that, the pre like practice, like

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Speaker 3: several practices, the building up towards whenever we'd get our

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Speaker 3: first scrimmage, right. I was so awful that and like

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Speaker 3: it was in like the neighboring community where I think

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Speaker 3: the kids were like a little tougher there I played.

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Speaker 3: I believe they were trying to put me in like

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Speaker 3: defensive line or something like that. There was a drill

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Speaker 3: that was like essentially just two football players run at

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Speaker 3: each other and maybe try to get past each other.

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Speaker 3: And you're like, and everybody was knocking me over to

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Speaker 3: a point that one of the kids came over like,

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Speaker 3: hey man, just so you know, all those guys are

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Speaker 3: making fun of you because you're like the easiest guy

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Speaker 3: to take gathered as much.

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Speaker 1: Okay, nice.

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Speaker 2: It also didn't need to know that the kids are

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Speaker 2: so fast.

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Speaker 1: You need to know that.

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Speaker 3: And that didn't make me feel good. Sure, and like

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Speaker 3: I think, yeah, he implied that they were not only

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Speaker 3: make yeh, making fun of me, but also they like

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Speaker 3: liked beating the shit out of me. And so after

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Speaker 3: that practice, I was pretty bent out of shape and

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Speaker 3: I was I told my mom, I was like, I

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Speaker 3: don't think I want to do this anymore. And Dad

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Speaker 3: did still want me to stick it out because he

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Speaker 3: felt like I made a commitment, which is very fair.

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Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, but I ultimately was able to get out

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Speaker 3: of it. And then in high school I played a year,

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Speaker 3: I did a year of wrestling. I did okay at that.

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Speaker 3: Then I did a year of JV volleyball. Okay, again,

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Speaker 3: fine with that. But my junior year it was cool

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Speaker 3: with my dad that I take drama and do sort

300
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Speaker 3: of and ultimately I like auditioned for the there was

301
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Speaker 3: a new improv troup on campus. He was cool with

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Speaker 3: that sort of being a replacement for the sports. And

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Speaker 3: one could argue that that sort of set forth the

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Speaker 3: rest of my life.

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Speaker 1: And yeah, ye yeah in your trajectory when you said

306
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Speaker 1: you like went to your mom to be like, I

307
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Speaker 1: don't really want to play this pop born of football anymore,

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Speaker 1: and not did you even think to go to your

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Speaker 1: dad to tell him that, like or did you kind

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Speaker 1: of know like he's he's I think pushing me.

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Speaker 3: So I think it probably could have been. I think, yeah,

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Speaker 3: I think yes, I think like I probably would have

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Speaker 3: led with asking my mom, though I also think she

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Speaker 3: was also like he was. It was a scenario where

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Speaker 3: like when I got home.

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Speaker 1: She was she was the one who was there, I

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Speaker 1: got you, Okay, got it.

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Speaker 2: And then your dad being kind of like okay with

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Speaker 2: improvs like replacing whatever sports you were doing from wrestling

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Speaker 2: to volleyball, replacing whatever sports you were doing your junior year.

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Speaker 2: Did he have like any sense or knowledge of what

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Speaker 2: improv was or was it just like okay, as long

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Speaker 2: as you're doing something.

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Speaker 3: Honestly, I'm not sure. I mean I think we like,

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Speaker 3: you know, whose line is it? Anyway, it was on TV,

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Speaker 3: so yeah, I think it's also like pretty obvious once

327
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Speaker 3: you see a show what it is. Yeah, but yeah,

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Speaker 3: drama he definitely got. It's like, oh, I'm going to

329
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Speaker 3: be trying to do like yeah, a Shakespeare play or something, okay,

330
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Speaker 3: and he.

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Speaker 2: Was did he seem excited, like as excited about that

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Speaker 2: and the fact that you just had something that you

333
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:18,760
Speaker 2: were excited about and passionate about or was it sort

334
00:16:18,800 --> 00:16:21,320
Speaker 2: of like okay, yeah, fine.

335
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Speaker 3: I think it was like Okay, that sounds good, you know,

336
00:16:23,880 --> 00:16:25,560
Speaker 3: like yeah, I think like I think it's all with

337
00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:28,600
Speaker 3: the like if you stick to it, sure. And then

338
00:16:28,680 --> 00:16:32,520
Speaker 3: I think also added to that like when he saw

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00:16:32,640 --> 00:16:36,320
Speaker 3: that I arguably excelled at it, or like it was

340
00:16:36,360 --> 00:16:40,520
Speaker 3: like I liked it, and I seemingly did well at it.

341
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Speaker 3: I think that absolutely like worked for him in terms

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Speaker 3: of what he was hoping for.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that makes sense, that makes sense. That's cool.

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Speaker 2: I mean even that he would have come around and

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Speaker 2: be supportive when he was like, sports is his thing.

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Speaker 1: You know, We've seen all the movies.

347
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Speaker 2: Where it's like the star football player is going to

348
00:16:59,240 --> 00:17:02,240
Speaker 2: be in the school play and like everyone's like if yeah,

349
00:17:02,280 --> 00:17:04,320
Speaker 2: the fish out of water. So the fact that sports

350
00:17:04,359 --> 00:17:05,960
Speaker 2: was his thing and he's like, yeah, if you want

351
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Speaker 2: to do drama, if you're gonna commit to it, then fine.

352
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Speaker 1: But that's a value of his. Then he tried to

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Speaker 1: instill in you commitment.

354
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Speaker 2: Were there any other values you felt like he was

355
00:17:26,680 --> 00:17:29,920
Speaker 2: trying to or even in retrospect, feel like he was

356
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Speaker 2: instilling in you at the time.

357
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Speaker 3: See, he it was very kind of classic good grades,

358
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Speaker 3: Like he really he definitely encouraged us to go to college,

359
00:17:41,320 --> 00:17:47,240
Speaker 3: and specifically to go to a college outside of San

360
00:17:47,240 --> 00:17:49,600
Speaker 3: Diego where I was from. So it was very important

361
00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:53,119
Speaker 3: to him. He felt like, you need that time away

362
00:17:53,280 --> 00:17:56,400
Speaker 3: from home to learn about, you know, life outside of

363
00:17:57,720 --> 00:18:01,120
Speaker 3: you know, not within the perimeter of the family and what.

364
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:03,320
Speaker 1: You know, yeah, did he do that? By the way,

365
00:18:03,520 --> 00:18:06,880
Speaker 1: go to college away from home, so from Tape Cod.

366
00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:10,280
Speaker 3: But where do he ended up going to? First to

367
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Speaker 3: Orange Coast Community College I believe it's called in, which

368
00:18:14,119 --> 00:18:16,240
Speaker 3: I believe is in Orange County, and then ultimately to

369
00:18:17,560 --> 00:18:18,840
Speaker 3: San Diego State University.

370
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Speaker 1: Okay, how do you find himself east to west?

371
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Speaker 3: You know this is something I should.

372
00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:27,120
Speaker 1: Know, but you don't really totally.

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Speaker 3: I know that he there was a time when his

374
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:36,200
Speaker 3: sister lived out west. He also was a surfer, so

375
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Speaker 3: I would imagine that was something that pulled him to

376
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Speaker 3: the West Coast. And there's a whole nother lane that,

377
00:18:43,920 --> 00:18:46,880
Speaker 3: like I get mixed up in terms of how much

378
00:18:46,880 --> 00:18:52,000
Speaker 3: it overlaps with him pursuing anthropology is what he studied,

379
00:18:52,560 --> 00:18:56,159
Speaker 3: but he also for a time wanted to be a

380
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Speaker 3: cartoonist an artist. Oh cool, And he did drawings for

381
00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:06,720
Speaker 3: the school yearbook and his football team and basketball team.

382
00:19:07,119 --> 00:19:12,400
Speaker 3: And he apparently went to Disney whether it's it's unclear

383
00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:15,320
Speaker 3: whether he went to Disney Studios, which would be in Burbank,

384
00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:18,040
Speaker 3: or he went to Disneyland. But he brought with him

385
00:19:18,359 --> 00:19:23,840
Speaker 3: a portfolio of drawings, right and was able to speak

386
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Speaker 3: to somebody of note who looked at the drawings and said,

387
00:19:28,920 --> 00:19:30,440
Speaker 3: you know what, you got to go to school.

388
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Speaker 1: Like for drawing or just do something like it.

389
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Speaker 3: I think the implication was like, if you want to

390
00:19:35,240 --> 00:19:36,720
Speaker 3: work here, you got to go to art school.

391
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Speaker 1: Okay, got it?

392
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Speaker 2: Okay, And when that happened, that's really that's cool as hell.

393
00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:44,719
Speaker 2: When that happened, was our school like an option to him?

394
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Speaker 2: Do you know, like, because I know sometimes it's hard

395
00:19:46,160 --> 00:19:50,040
Speaker 2: to piece together our parent stories too, because I yeah.

396
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Speaker 1: I don't, but don't feel bad.

397
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Speaker 3: I would imagine his father was not super encouraging of him,

398
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Speaker 3: like pursuing an art degree.

399
00:19:57,080 --> 00:19:58,399
Speaker 1: Right, okay, got it?

400
00:19:58,840 --> 00:20:01,479
Speaker 2: Yeah, And by the way, don't feel bad about not

401
00:20:01,600 --> 00:20:04,040
Speaker 2: knowing the details. In my opinion, though, you shouldn't feel

402
00:20:04,080 --> 00:20:06,600
Speaker 2: bad because my mom can be a woman of few

403
00:20:06,600 --> 00:20:08,800
Speaker 2: words too, and I'm like, she's not I just said

404
00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:10,360
Speaker 2: to someone recently, I was like, she's not gonna ever

405
00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:13,600
Speaker 2: sit me down and be like, let me tell you

406
00:20:14,119 --> 00:20:16,560
Speaker 2: how I got from here to here. I sort of

407
00:20:16,600 --> 00:20:19,399
Speaker 2: have to piece together whenever we have little conversations, and

408
00:20:19,440 --> 00:20:21,320
Speaker 2: I'm like trying to trying to do the timeline, but.

409
00:20:21,280 --> 00:20:23,520
Speaker 3: I actually know, I'm sure my father has told you

410
00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:26,000
Speaker 3: so many times. Yeah, I think that my brain scrambled.

411
00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:28,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's okay, that's all right, lot on you have

412
00:20:28,600 --> 00:20:29,720
Speaker 2: your you have dad brain.

413
00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:32,119
Speaker 1: Now that's the that's true. You do. You can you

414
00:20:32,160 --> 00:20:32,800
Speaker 1: can blame that.

415
00:20:32,840 --> 00:20:35,000
Speaker 2: You can if you forget anything about me, anything I

416
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,480
Speaker 2: say today, whatever, just dad.

417
00:20:37,600 --> 00:20:39,720
Speaker 3: There is a lot I'm working on, like some sort

418
00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:42,080
Speaker 3: of level of constant exhaustion.

419
00:20:42,560 --> 00:20:45,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like, but then didn't SNL prime you

420
00:20:45,040 --> 00:20:45,240
Speaker 1: for that.

421
00:20:46,960 --> 00:20:47,919
Speaker 3: It's it's different.

422
00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:50,359
Speaker 1: It's different. Do you know how could you explain the difference,

423
00:20:50,359 --> 00:20:51,719
Speaker 1: because I'm like, I want to be a parent one day.

424
00:20:51,720 --> 00:20:52,200
Speaker 1: What's the time?

425
00:20:52,320 --> 00:20:55,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, well, yeah, I'm curious about your Yeah, how you

426
00:20:55,680 --> 00:20:58,040
Speaker 3: how exhausted you feel over the course of natsno week

427
00:20:58,080 --> 00:21:02,520
Speaker 3: because Monday is chill. Monday to going into Tuesday is

428
00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:06,760
Speaker 3: not that bad. Yeah, Tuesday's tough because Tuesday or typically writing,

429
00:21:07,920 --> 00:21:12,080
Speaker 3: you could be writing until four five in the morning, yep,

430
00:21:12,359 --> 00:21:15,280
Speaker 3: and then sometimes you need to wake up Wednesday morning

431
00:21:15,359 --> 00:21:18,000
Speaker 3: to like finish off the piece. It's do at noon.

432
00:21:18,119 --> 00:21:21,520
Speaker 3: So you're writing at like what you're like some talk at.

433
00:21:21,440 --> 00:21:23,920
Speaker 1: Seven eighty nine am. I'm waking up with some I'm

434
00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:26,680
Speaker 1: getting in the document sometimes at seven and.

435
00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:29,040
Speaker 3: Then you need to do the table read, which is like,

436
00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:31,000
Speaker 3: oh my god.

437
00:21:31,320 --> 00:21:33,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, then the whole and you got to perform them,

438
00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:36,640
Speaker 2: be energized, yes, and like and bring it and try

439
00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:37,320
Speaker 2: to sell a piece.

440
00:21:37,520 --> 00:21:40,160
Speaker 3: What no, what is your when you when your piece

441
00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:43,280
Speaker 3: is about to come up? Yeah, it's is it clear

442
00:21:43,359 --> 00:21:45,240
Speaker 3: enough what we're talking about? The table read? Like we

443
00:21:45,359 --> 00:21:49,119
Speaker 3: read forty pieces and like, Kyle, my piece might be

444
00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:52,159
Speaker 3: like seventeenth in the first half or something like that.

445
00:21:52,200 --> 00:21:53,720
Speaker 1: The first half is the first twenty. Yes, then we

446
00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:55,120
Speaker 1: get a little break between halftime.

447
00:21:55,600 --> 00:21:59,080
Speaker 3: But it's like the piece that I wrote with some

448
00:21:59,080 --> 00:22:02,280
Speaker 3: some other this is the thing that means so much

449
00:22:02,359 --> 00:22:05,399
Speaker 3: to me. I think this is really funny and like

450
00:22:05,840 --> 00:22:08,600
Speaker 3: I'm gonna I'm there's an angle on it's something I

451
00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:12,199
Speaker 3: have something interesting to say, and like I've got this

452
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:16,560
Speaker 3: new character. What is your anticipation? Like, as like your

453
00:22:16,840 --> 00:22:18,080
Speaker 3: piece is about to come up.

454
00:22:18,320 --> 00:22:22,760
Speaker 2: I get a little nervous still and just a little anxious,

455
00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:26,960
Speaker 2: and I'm like all the work you spent hours and

456
00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:29,960
Speaker 2: hours doing last night that made you forego sleep, and

457
00:22:30,040 --> 00:22:32,040
Speaker 2: even when you were sleeping, it wasn't good sleep because

458
00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:33,800
Speaker 2: you're thinking about how you can make that piece better

459
00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:36,679
Speaker 2: or finish it whatever. I'm like, it's all hinging on

460
00:22:36,720 --> 00:22:40,160
Speaker 2: this moment. My Saturday is kind of hinging on this moment. Yeah,

461
00:22:40,240 --> 00:22:42,840
Speaker 2: I feel really stressed. I went to a nutritionist because one,

462
00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:45,320
Speaker 2: my stomach always hurts, but also my fault because I

463
00:22:45,359 --> 00:22:47,640
Speaker 2: eat things that I know my body can't process.

464
00:22:47,960 --> 00:22:48,920
Speaker 1: But I was like, my.

465
00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:51,080
Speaker 2: Stomach oays hurts and it shouldn't. And she we did

466
00:22:51,119 --> 00:22:53,879
Speaker 2: like hormonal tests and she's like, your cortisol levels are

467
00:22:53,920 --> 00:22:55,960
Speaker 2: all out of whack and that's the stress hormone. And

468
00:22:56,040 --> 00:22:58,600
Speaker 2: so I just feel like it's a constant state of

469
00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:01,359
Speaker 2: and I don't even know if it's exhaustion. It probably is,

470
00:23:01,400 --> 00:23:02,920
Speaker 2: but I don't recognize it in real time.

471
00:23:03,080 --> 00:23:03,680
Speaker 1: That's no week.

472
00:23:03,960 --> 00:23:07,800
Speaker 2: It's like anxiety and angst and stress on a on

473
00:23:07,880 --> 00:23:08,400
Speaker 2: a thousand.

474
00:23:08,440 --> 00:23:10,320
Speaker 1: What about you before your piece at table?

475
00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:13,040
Speaker 3: Well, I want to tell you, but I also but like,

476
00:23:13,080 --> 00:23:17,080
Speaker 3: are you like minutes before, seconds before, or like fifteen

477
00:23:17,119 --> 00:23:20,000
Speaker 3: minutes are you ever like you know, sort of doing

478
00:23:20,040 --> 00:23:27,080
Speaker 3: the carre like yes, yes, greetings mister Anderson piece.

479
00:23:27,520 --> 00:23:27,720
Speaker 1: Yes.

480
00:23:27,880 --> 00:23:30,240
Speaker 2: Meanwhile, we are reading another piece. And if you look

481
00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:32,840
Speaker 2: up at table reads sometimes like I'll look up at

482
00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:34,840
Speaker 2: table read, and I like sit across from Heidi and

483
00:23:34,840 --> 00:23:37,120
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, she's she's gearing up to she's already

484
00:23:37,119 --> 00:23:38,240
Speaker 2: got a piece coming like the.

485
00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:40,959
Speaker 3: Next Yeah, you're like flipped. You're flipped, like nine sketchs

486
00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:44,280
Speaker 3: that had like greetings mister and er something, Yeah, greetings

487
00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:45,040
Speaker 3: mister Anders.

488
00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:49,320
Speaker 2: Like what's the difference, Hey, I'm all out of cash?

489
00:23:49,359 --> 00:23:54,920
Speaker 2: You were that sketch really funny, really fun classic classic. Yes,

490
00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:57,960
Speaker 2: very stressed, So you don't think the exhaustion is the

491
00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:01,000
Speaker 2: same though for you like s and Alexasder and being

492
00:24:01,040 --> 00:24:02,120
Speaker 2: a down and.

493
00:24:02,160 --> 00:24:07,480
Speaker 3: To answer question, yes, I got very anxious before my pieces. Yeah,

494
00:24:07,520 --> 00:24:11,080
Speaker 3: and I like I think the show actually, like I

495
00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:14,240
Speaker 3: think I already had some of these issues but really

496
00:24:14,920 --> 00:24:20,840
Speaker 3: sort of exaggerated OCD like kind of rituals that did

497
00:24:20,880 --> 00:24:22,919
Speaker 3: not exist prior to me working there. And so like

498
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:25,720
Speaker 3: I would be like sipping a very specific amount of

499
00:24:25,760 --> 00:24:28,760
Speaker 3: SIPs of from the bottle of water, cleaning my glasses

500
00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:31,159
Speaker 3: in a very specific way, and that would be like,

501
00:24:31,600 --> 00:24:34,200
Speaker 3: you know, a sketch before I would be going nuts.

502
00:24:34,240 --> 00:24:35,560
Speaker 2: These are the things, These are all the things I

503
00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:37,000
Speaker 2: have to do. You actually have OCD.

504
00:24:37,480 --> 00:24:40,600
Speaker 3: I Yes, though I've worked through it.

505
00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:43,160
Speaker 1: Sure, Okay, I mean yeah, okay.

506
00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:45,560
Speaker 2: If you couldn't get through your ritual by the time

507
00:24:45,640 --> 00:24:47,520
Speaker 2: your sketch started, would you feel like, oh shit, this

508
00:24:47,560 --> 00:24:48,000
Speaker 2: is doomed.

509
00:24:48,440 --> 00:24:49,320
Speaker 1: Oh god, I didn't get.

510
00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:53,280
Speaker 3: Would I would almost force myself to like get through

511
00:24:53,280 --> 00:24:56,479
Speaker 3: the ritual even if it was like a moment before

512
00:24:57,400 --> 00:25:01,960
Speaker 3: Greetings mister Anderson, I got you.

513
00:25:04,040 --> 00:25:08,000
Speaker 2: It is its own beast like SNL and I feel

514
00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:11,360
Speaker 2: like no matter where, Like I saw Beck at your

515
00:25:11,359 --> 00:25:14,240
Speaker 2: birthday party recently, I haven't seen back in so long,

516
00:25:14,359 --> 00:25:16,560
Speaker 2: and it was like, we have to talk about the show.

517
00:25:16,880 --> 00:25:18,680
Speaker 2: You got to talk about the show a little bit,

518
00:25:18,720 --> 00:25:21,200
Speaker 2: and it's the show, you know all we know the one.

519
00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:25,040
Speaker 2: It's but you feel like parenting is like you, it's

520
00:25:25,119 --> 00:25:26,840
Speaker 2: just different. It's apples and orange.

521
00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:28,760
Speaker 3: Well the big okay, so the bag. So yeah, So

522
00:25:28,960 --> 00:25:34,159
Speaker 3: we're saying Wednesday is tough because you're going off minimal

523
00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:37,320
Speaker 3: sleep on Tuesday, right, Yeah, Thursday can be okay.

524
00:25:37,880 --> 00:25:38,360
Speaker 1: Yeah.

525
00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:40,720
Speaker 3: Friday if you have to shoot a pre tape in

526
00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:42,840
Speaker 3: the morning or a pro tape too late at night,

527
00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:44,200
Speaker 3: yeah yeah, that is tough.

528
00:25:44,359 --> 00:25:45,560
Speaker 1: Yeah.

529
00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:47,840
Speaker 3: Uh, Saturday, you actually kind of get in theory if

530
00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:49,520
Speaker 3: you're not up too late. You get to sleep in

531
00:25:49,560 --> 00:25:53,119
Speaker 3: a little bit, but you're gonna have butterflies.

532
00:25:52,640 --> 00:25:54,480
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, because you got to see how this works

533
00:25:54,480 --> 00:25:55,640
Speaker 1: and running a live audience.

534
00:25:55,880 --> 00:25:59,760
Speaker 3: And then Sunday Sunday, we all have a different Sunday.

535
00:26:00,000 --> 00:26:00,880
Speaker 3: I would go hard on.

536
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:03,480
Speaker 1: Sunday, like you have a full day and get up

537
00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:05,119
Speaker 1: and like we need it. I need to live life.

538
00:26:05,280 --> 00:26:09,040
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I I'm somewhere in the middle there. I

539
00:26:09,080 --> 00:26:12,000
Speaker 2: don't like doing nothing and just resting in lay bed

540
00:26:12,119 --> 00:26:15,000
Speaker 2: riding all day. But I also am like, you do

541
00:26:15,160 --> 00:26:17,840
Speaker 2: need to like recoup some of that lost sleep. You

542
00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:19,280
Speaker 2: can't really repay sleep debt.

543
00:26:19,359 --> 00:26:21,359
Speaker 1: I read. I learned that in a p psych shout

544
00:26:21,400 --> 00:26:22,280
Speaker 1: out to mister Bresler.

545
00:26:23,960 --> 00:26:29,159
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's actually where I saw the footage of I was.

546
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:33,399
Speaker 2: That's where of the foe you were an as I

547
00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:36,359
Speaker 2: was in. I was in seventh grade government class. Not

548
00:26:36,720 --> 00:26:39,399
Speaker 2: too unlike psych to me. I don't know.

549
00:26:39,520 --> 00:26:42,320
Speaker 3: I guess both could be considered, like could have something

550
00:26:42,359 --> 00:26:45,320
Speaker 3: to say about the events that day? Are you being

551
00:26:45,359 --> 00:26:46,880
Speaker 3: earnest government?

552
00:26:46,920 --> 00:26:50,880
Speaker 1: I feel like, yeah, yeah, I think they could.

553
00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:53,040
Speaker 3: You not trying to take it there, let's take it there.

554
00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:55,879
Speaker 3: I don't don't want.

555
00:26:55,760 --> 00:26:58,600
Speaker 2: To feel like I've said more. I've said as much

556
00:26:58,600 --> 00:27:00,000
Speaker 2: as I can actually say about it.

557
00:27:00,200 --> 00:27:02,080
Speaker 3: When you have a baby, you cannot sleep.

558
00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:05,120
Speaker 1: But it's different though.

559
00:27:04,920 --> 00:27:07,240
Speaker 3: It's just like one I think the main the main

560
00:27:07,240 --> 00:27:09,720
Speaker 3: difference is like at the end of the day, you

561
00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:13,399
Speaker 3: are still looking out for pre baby. I was looking

562
00:27:13,400 --> 00:27:13,800
Speaker 3: out for.

563
00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:16,560
Speaker 1: Me, dude, what I mean, Yeah, I could.

564
00:27:16,760 --> 00:27:20,399
Speaker 3: Go out to dinner, go grab a drink with a friend,

565
00:27:21,040 --> 00:27:24,879
Speaker 3: you know. Now Now it's just like there's this human

566
00:27:24,960 --> 00:27:28,960
Speaker 3: being that you're kind of constantly thinking about, conscious of

567
00:27:29,400 --> 00:27:33,399
Speaker 3: wanting to make sure that they're okay, and that does

568
00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:36,120
Speaker 3: some that sometimes that's obviously waking up in the middle

569
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:38,960
Speaker 3: of the night to help them. You're just it's just

570
00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:44,240
Speaker 3: a different level of attachment and responsibility.

571
00:27:44,440 --> 00:27:45,120
Speaker 1: Yeah.

572
00:27:45,320 --> 00:27:48,080
Speaker 3: So, like I would say, like the tough thing about

573
00:27:48,359 --> 00:27:51,440
Speaker 3: a baby, and it's a different type of endurance because

574
00:27:51,440 --> 00:27:53,919
Speaker 3: it's just like, how can I keep on entertaining you.

575
00:27:53,960 --> 00:27:57,520
Speaker 3: I've used all of my moves, whereas like if you're

576
00:27:57,600 --> 00:28:00,119
Speaker 3: tired at an SNL day, you sort of know the

577
00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:01,159
Speaker 3: routine is going to be.

578
00:28:01,520 --> 00:28:04,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I understand that without again, without having like

579
00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:07,000
Speaker 2: walked in your shoes. I'm like that makes sense. Did

580
00:28:07,040 --> 00:28:12,719
Speaker 2: becoming a father yourself, make you reflect on who your

581
00:28:12,800 --> 00:28:15,240
Speaker 2: dad is, how he is, how he did as a dad,

582
00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:18,280
Speaker 2: differently than maybe you were reflecting on it before you

583
00:28:18,320 --> 00:28:18,880
Speaker 2: became a dad.

584
00:28:19,160 --> 00:28:23,720
Speaker 3: Yeah. I think I think I thought about it pretty immediately. Like,

585
00:28:24,520 --> 00:28:30,359
Speaker 3: I think it's incredibly impressive because it's so frightening to

586
00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:34,879
Speaker 3: know that I am in charge of this person. Yeah, along,

587
00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:38,920
Speaker 3: obviously I have my wife who does more, if not,

588
00:28:39,040 --> 00:28:43,720
Speaker 3: you know, who is doing a big load of the work.

589
00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:48,600
Speaker 3: But like to raise a person from zero to eighteen

590
00:28:49,040 --> 00:28:51,320
Speaker 3: years or even if you want to say to forty years,

591
00:28:51,360 --> 00:28:53,680
Speaker 3: I think you could make an argument for that. Yeah,

592
00:28:53,720 --> 00:28:56,360
Speaker 3: he is still there for me. Yeah, and I saw him.

593
00:28:56,400 --> 00:28:57,600
Speaker 3: He was at my birthday party.

594
00:28:57,720 --> 00:28:59,320
Speaker 1: Did I wish I could have seen him, right?

595
00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:03,120
Speaker 3: But yeah, I think it's just like it was definitely

596
00:29:03,160 --> 00:29:06,800
Speaker 3: trippy to think about, like, oh, he was doing this thing.

597
00:29:06,880 --> 00:29:10,800
Speaker 3: I've never thought about him putting me in a swaddle,

598
00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:14,520
Speaker 3: or like feeding a bottle to me or changing my diaper.

599
00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:18,560
Speaker 3: Like it's like there's a whole component of parenting. And

600
00:29:18,640 --> 00:29:21,840
Speaker 3: my parents said, like I never got to appreciate or

601
00:29:21,880 --> 00:29:23,080
Speaker 3: think about you know what I mean?

602
00:29:23,680 --> 00:29:28,160
Speaker 2: M m, Yeah, that's what I imagine becoming a parent. Does

603
00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:31,480
Speaker 2: really like, yeah, you see your parents one way and

604
00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:34,080
Speaker 2: one I think like going to college. Going away to

605
00:29:34,160 --> 00:29:35,760
Speaker 2: college for me was a moment where I go, oh,

606
00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:38,280
Speaker 2: my mom, Oh, this is what she was trying to do.

607
00:29:38,360 --> 00:29:40,880
Speaker 2: She was trying to instill these values in me. And

608
00:29:40,920 --> 00:29:43,400
Speaker 2: I didn't see it that way. I just was like dumb,

609
00:29:43,600 --> 00:29:46,040
Speaker 2: thoughtless kid, just being like my mom, and I want

610
00:29:46,040 --> 00:29:48,480
Speaker 2: my mom to do this and be this way, and

611
00:29:48,560 --> 00:29:50,840
Speaker 2: like I'm butting heads with my mom, right, And then

612
00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:55,040
Speaker 2: you go and have your worldview expanded and you go, oh,

613
00:29:55,400 --> 00:29:58,600
Speaker 2: while I was under her roof and under her direct supervision,

614
00:29:59,040 --> 00:30:01,200
Speaker 2: this is what she was trying to do, like fully,

615
00:30:01,280 --> 00:30:05,320
Speaker 2: just shape a human and make me decent and in

616
00:30:05,440 --> 00:30:08,240
Speaker 2: some way self sufficient and such and just yeah again

617
00:30:08,400 --> 00:30:11,360
Speaker 2: and still the values she finds important in me.

618
00:30:11,760 --> 00:30:14,000
Speaker 3: And you ended up you studied what you were like

619
00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:14,560
Speaker 3: pre medical.

620
00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:15,400
Speaker 1: I was pre med.

621
00:30:15,440 --> 00:30:17,960
Speaker 2: I was a bio major in college, which I'm sure

622
00:30:18,000 --> 00:30:19,880
Speaker 2: part of why we didn't overlap, because I was just

623
00:30:19,920 --> 00:30:21,400
Speaker 2: like in that world of people.

624
00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:24,840
Speaker 3: And don't you feel like, I mean, she must have

625
00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:28,400
Speaker 3: done incredible. I mean that is such a I would

626
00:30:28,440 --> 00:30:33,000
Speaker 3: imagine difficult school place to get into. And now you're

627
00:30:33,240 --> 00:30:35,360
Speaker 3: a Hollywood star, Like what.

628
00:30:35,480 --> 00:30:39,200
Speaker 1: I mean, like, well, thanks Kyle, Yeah.

629
00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:40,719
Speaker 3: She must have done some pretty good work.

630
00:30:40,920 --> 00:30:43,720
Speaker 2: I think so actually, thank you, because I also think

631
00:30:43,760 --> 00:30:47,440
Speaker 2: my siblings, I just feel like our whole trajectory could

632
00:30:47,440 --> 00:30:52,200
Speaker 2: look different, Like on paper, single mom of four and

633
00:30:52,280 --> 00:30:54,720
Speaker 2: what she did with that, I just go, wow, I'm

634
00:30:54,760 --> 00:30:57,720
Speaker 2: so grateful because this all could have just looked really different,

635
00:30:58,040 --> 00:31:01,160
Speaker 2: you know, if someone else had been my single mom

636
00:31:01,480 --> 00:31:03,640
Speaker 2: or if not. By the grace of God, all these

637
00:31:03,640 --> 00:31:07,160
Speaker 2: things worked out the way they did. But I always

638
00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:09,600
Speaker 2: felt like, even having this like insane dream of like

639
00:31:09,640 --> 00:31:11,120
Speaker 2: I want to be an actor, no one in my

640
00:31:11,120 --> 00:31:12,880
Speaker 2: family has ever done it, and I'm gonna move to

641
00:31:12,880 --> 00:31:15,080
Speaker 2: Los Angeles, across the country where we know no one.

642
00:31:15,120 --> 00:31:18,400
Speaker 2: Everyone in my family is in Nigeria, London and like

643
00:31:18,480 --> 00:31:21,440
Speaker 2: Maryland and so oh in Jersey and so I'm like

644
00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:23,880
Speaker 2: all East Coast. But I'm like, I'm going to go

645
00:31:23,880 --> 00:31:26,000
Speaker 2: over there and I'm going to do this thing. Now

646
00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:28,960
Speaker 2: that I'm older, I'm I'm like, you know, when you're younger,

647
00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:30,200
Speaker 2: it's just like I want to do that thing, and

648
00:31:30,240 --> 00:31:31,920
Speaker 2: I have the one track mind about it. But now

649
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:34,360
Speaker 2: that i'm older, I'm like, oh, the fact that I

650
00:31:34,440 --> 00:31:38,040
Speaker 2: thought I could do that thing. I mean partially maybe

651
00:31:38,120 --> 00:31:40,400
Speaker 2: means I'm crazy, but I'm like, I just thought, if

652
00:31:40,400 --> 00:31:42,240
Speaker 2: I put in the work and if I'm diligent and

653
00:31:42,240 --> 00:31:45,080
Speaker 2: I'm strategic about it, I could do it. And I

654
00:31:45,120 --> 00:31:47,760
Speaker 2: think that is a testament to the way my mom

655
00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:48,560
Speaker 2: raised me.

656
00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:52,400
Speaker 3: In a space where that sort of thinking was yeah, maybe.

657
00:31:52,240 --> 00:31:55,560
Speaker 2: Encouraged, yeah, and cultivated. Yeah exactly. But as a dad,

658
00:31:55,600 --> 00:32:00,200
Speaker 2: now yourself, what well one I want to know, were

659
00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:02,040
Speaker 2: you at all scared about becoming a father?

660
00:32:02,560 --> 00:32:04,680
Speaker 3: Yeah? I think I think I have a hard time

661
00:32:04,680 --> 00:32:07,640
Speaker 3: believing you're not gonna be some like you're not gonna

662
00:32:07,640 --> 00:32:11,520
Speaker 3: be scared. Yeah, it's just it's too it's too.

663
00:32:11,320 --> 00:32:16,160
Speaker 2: Heavy, Yeah, to be responsible, like fully responsible for another Yeah.

664
00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:18,640
Speaker 3: Like do what do I actually know? You know? And

665
00:32:18,680 --> 00:32:21,360
Speaker 3: the thing is I can't change a tire and I

666
00:32:21,400 --> 00:32:27,360
Speaker 3: probably can't change oil. Like they're very simple things that

667
00:32:27,440 --> 00:32:30,040
Speaker 3: I cannot do. And you would probably be impressed, like

668
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:33,880
Speaker 3: how how how many abilities? I like lack?

669
00:32:35,880 --> 00:32:39,120
Speaker 2: But I yes, yes, and yes and no. Like if

670
00:32:39,160 --> 00:32:41,160
Speaker 2: I heard the list and it was like this crazy

671
00:32:41,160 --> 00:32:44,160
Speaker 2: extensive list, which maybe it is because it's also an

672
00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:46,960
Speaker 2: extensive list for me, because there's things I like to

673
00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:48,720
Speaker 2: be like, oh, I know a little bit about a

674
00:32:48,800 --> 00:32:51,040
Speaker 2: lot of things I think is true of me, but

675
00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:52,320
Speaker 2: there's a lot of shit.

676
00:32:52,240 --> 00:32:53,400
Speaker 1: I know nothing.

677
00:32:54,200 --> 00:32:56,480
Speaker 2: I don't know anything about, Like your dad tell you sports,

678
00:32:56,520 --> 00:32:59,000
Speaker 2: I don't really know much about sports, but I can

679
00:32:59,080 --> 00:33:02,360
Speaker 2: like have intelligent enough of a conversation. Remember we were

680
00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:04,560
Speaker 2: like going down the nine to eleven path, and you're like,

681
00:33:04,680 --> 00:33:06,600
Speaker 2: that's about all I've got on that. That's how I

682
00:33:06,600 --> 00:33:08,520
Speaker 2: feel about sports, where I can be like, I know

683
00:33:08,520 --> 00:33:10,640
Speaker 2: who that player is. I think I know where who

684
00:33:10,720 --> 00:33:12,720
Speaker 2: they play for. But I'm like there's a long list

685
00:33:12,760 --> 00:33:15,280
Speaker 2: of shit for most of us that we don't know

686
00:33:15,320 --> 00:33:18,040
Speaker 2: anything about. But then like you're allowed to create a

687
00:33:18,120 --> 00:33:20,760
Speaker 2: human and then be responsible for that human and be

688
00:33:20,840 --> 00:33:22,040
Speaker 2: like I'm going to raise that human.

689
00:33:22,400 --> 00:33:25,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, And you know what I think is what was

690
00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:28,760
Speaker 3: said to me, maybe by my brother who has two children.

691
00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:30,440
Speaker 3: I don't know where I first heard it, but like,

692
00:33:30,840 --> 00:33:36,440
Speaker 3: there are so many people are having children constantly, right,

693
00:33:37,160 --> 00:33:41,840
Speaker 3: and there are some forgive me stupid people out there

694
00:33:42,280 --> 00:33:45,960
Speaker 3: having children yeah, and they're able to do it. Yeah,

695
00:33:46,240 --> 00:33:49,600
Speaker 3: So like I probably have some of the building blocks

696
00:33:49,640 --> 00:33:53,640
Speaker 3: that like give me an advantage to so many other folks.

697
00:33:53,680 --> 00:33:54,040
Speaker 3: Out there.

698
00:33:54,120 --> 00:33:56,480
Speaker 2: Yes, I agree with that, and that might sound I

699
00:33:56,520 --> 00:33:58,920
Speaker 2: don't hear in an arrogant way at all, and like

700
00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:01,520
Speaker 2: you seem like maybe like even reticent to say to me,

701
00:34:01,600 --> 00:34:02,160
Speaker 2: like forgive me.

702
00:34:02,200 --> 00:34:02,840
Speaker 1: But here's the thing.

703
00:34:03,280 --> 00:34:06,719
Speaker 2: I was taking djaying lessons and I could not fucking

704
00:34:06,800 --> 00:34:08,759
Speaker 2: figure it out to save my life. But I'm like,

705
00:34:09,080 --> 00:34:10,440
Speaker 2: there are some dumb ass.

706
00:34:10,360 --> 00:34:11,239
Speaker 1: DJs out there.

707
00:34:11,320 --> 00:34:14,359
Speaker 2: I'm sure the fact that I can't figure this out,

708
00:34:14,440 --> 00:34:16,400
Speaker 2: I'm like, I think I need to actually devote the

709
00:34:16,440 --> 00:34:19,200
Speaker 2: proper time. I was like, I don't understand, and because

710
00:34:19,239 --> 00:34:21,960
Speaker 2: I really love music, but I'm like, I don't understand

711
00:34:22,000 --> 00:34:23,680
Speaker 2: how to use this system.

712
00:34:23,719 --> 00:34:25,880
Speaker 1: I just it's not I can't process.

713
00:34:25,920 --> 00:34:29,200
Speaker 2: But I'm like, I know anytime I have i'm facing

714
00:34:29,239 --> 00:34:30,640
Speaker 2: a hard thing, I think I will be like, but

715
00:34:30,680 --> 00:34:31,760
Speaker 2: there are dumb people.

716
00:34:31,880 --> 00:34:34,520
Speaker 3: Well that's I mean, like, yeah, I think actors are

717
00:34:34,560 --> 00:34:36,719
Speaker 3: the are like such a great example of that because

718
00:34:36,760 --> 00:34:39,879
Speaker 3: like some actors, I'm like, I feel like you see

719
00:34:39,920 --> 00:34:43,040
Speaker 3: them on screen, You're like, damn, that is such an

720
00:34:43,040 --> 00:34:46,840
Speaker 3: incredible performance. You're able to like hit these emotions, like

721
00:34:46,880 --> 00:34:50,719
Speaker 3: it's like I'm watching like real people on screen, and

722
00:34:50,760 --> 00:34:52,440
Speaker 3: then you interact with these people, you're.

723
00:34:52,320 --> 00:34:57,880
Speaker 1: Like, WHOA, exactly, Yes, I agree with that sentiment totally.

724
00:34:58,000 --> 00:35:00,000
Speaker 1: But that's why I'm like when people when we're scared

725
00:35:00,239 --> 00:35:02,560
Speaker 1: about be humming parents and then your brother says that

726
00:35:02,640 --> 00:35:04,680
Speaker 1: thing to you, right that you go, there's some dumb

727
00:35:04,680 --> 00:35:05,120
Speaker 1: people doing it.

728
00:35:05,160 --> 00:35:07,279
Speaker 2: People are having kids all the time. I'm certain you're

729
00:35:07,320 --> 00:35:09,920
Speaker 2: gonna be Okay, you can figure it out. Could you

730
00:35:09,960 --> 00:35:12,600
Speaker 2: elaborate on like what the fear was? Like I can

731
00:35:12,680 --> 00:35:14,920
Speaker 2: assume what the fear was, but like what if you

732
00:35:14,960 --> 00:35:16,280
Speaker 2: were to articulate it yourself.

733
00:35:16,719 --> 00:35:21,480
Speaker 3: I think one keeping the human alive, keeping baby alive

734
00:35:22,040 --> 00:35:26,040
Speaker 3: to an entirely new set of skills that I have

735
00:35:26,440 --> 00:35:31,240
Speaker 3: just don't know anything about as simple as changing a diaper,

736
00:35:31,560 --> 00:35:33,719
Speaker 3: you know any of or like kind of how do

737
00:35:33,840 --> 00:35:35,960
Speaker 3: I how do I hold the baby?

738
00:35:36,120 --> 00:35:36,960
Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah?

739
00:35:36,960 --> 00:35:41,960
Speaker 3: And then I think like the way more massive pressure

740
00:35:42,040 --> 00:35:44,960
Speaker 3: of like yeah, this hue this person I'm gonna raise,

741
00:35:45,040 --> 00:35:49,640
Speaker 3: and like can I like kind of help to mold

742
00:35:49,680 --> 00:35:53,160
Speaker 3: them in any way so that they have a good life,

743
00:35:53,200 --> 00:35:56,640
Speaker 3: and also being conscious of like I think one scary

744
00:35:56,719 --> 00:36:01,960
Speaker 3: thing is like my own sort of what I consider

745
00:36:02,040 --> 00:36:07,239
Speaker 3: my faults or neuroses or what I consider my mental issues,

746
00:36:07,360 --> 00:36:10,040
Speaker 3: Like the idea that like ough, I want like I

747
00:36:10,040 --> 00:36:11,800
Speaker 3: don't want to, like I don't really want to pass

748
00:36:11,880 --> 00:36:13,360
Speaker 3: some of this stuff on. Yeah.

749
00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:15,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, I have a very good friend who I think

750
00:36:15,800 --> 00:36:20,000
Speaker 2: would be an incredible parent, and they have expressed to me,

751
00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:23,160
Speaker 2: like I just off the bat, just how wonderful they are.

752
00:36:23,160 --> 00:36:24,920
Speaker 2: I'm like, you would be a fantastic parent, And to

753
00:36:24,960 --> 00:36:27,200
Speaker 2: hear them express to me like there are things I

754
00:36:27,239 --> 00:36:30,120
Speaker 2: just wouldn't want to pass on to a kid that

755
00:36:30,239 --> 00:36:31,960
Speaker 2: I just I feel like I came up in this

756
00:36:32,080 --> 00:36:35,200
Speaker 2: environment and this is inevitably inside of me and part

757
00:36:35,239 --> 00:36:35,440
Speaker 2: of me.

758
00:36:35,800 --> 00:36:37,000
Speaker 1: But then there's a part of me that goes.

759
00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:39,000
Speaker 2: But even the way that you think about that and

760
00:36:39,120 --> 00:36:41,200
Speaker 2: articulate that, and the way you just did just now

761
00:36:41,239 --> 00:36:43,920
Speaker 2: I go that, I think already sets you ahead of

762
00:36:43,960 --> 00:36:46,680
Speaker 2: the pack in terms of parenting. That level of thoughtfulness

763
00:36:46,880 --> 00:36:51,239
Speaker 2: about an awareness that like, hey, as this person's parent,

764
00:36:51,480 --> 00:36:53,879
Speaker 2: I am going to pass things on to them that

765
00:36:54,120 --> 00:36:56,360
Speaker 2: might not even be in my control or might not

766
00:36:56,440 --> 00:36:59,040
Speaker 2: be in the like forefront of my mind, but just

767
00:36:59,080 --> 00:37:01,719
Speaker 2: by virtue of growing up alongside of me or with

768
00:37:01,760 --> 00:37:03,560
Speaker 2: my DNA, this is going to be part of them.

769
00:37:03,600 --> 00:37:08,000
Speaker 2: I feel like some people are not even thinking about that. Again, yeah, yeah, yeah,

770
00:37:08,000 --> 00:37:10,960
Speaker 2: I think that's right. Yeah, yeah, when you talk about

771
00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:14,120
Speaker 2: feeling responsible for like molding the person your daughter.

772
00:37:14,360 --> 00:37:15,560
Speaker 1: How old is your daughter now, by the.

773
00:37:15,520 --> 00:37:16,719
Speaker 3: Way, fourteen months?

774
00:37:16,800 --> 00:37:17,279
Speaker 1: Oh fun?

775
00:37:17,880 --> 00:37:22,400
Speaker 2: Oh sweedie, I've seen pictures there. She's so cute, she is,

776
00:37:22,440 --> 00:37:25,680
Speaker 2: she's vicious. What are values you want to instill in her.

777
00:37:25,719 --> 00:37:28,440
Speaker 2: Your dad instilled in you, the importance of committing to

778
00:37:28,480 --> 00:37:32,279
Speaker 2: a thing, finishing it, education, going away for school. But

779
00:37:32,400 --> 00:37:34,160
Speaker 2: what are some things you want instilled in your daughter.

780
00:37:34,480 --> 00:37:34,920
Speaker 4: Well?

781
00:37:35,880 --> 00:37:39,160
Speaker 3: Be kind mm hmm. I get bothered by people who

782
00:37:39,560 --> 00:37:44,560
Speaker 3: aren't kind, and I think, yeah, I'm probably pretty big

783
00:37:44,600 --> 00:37:47,840
Speaker 3: on having a laugh and a sense of humor about

784
00:37:48,440 --> 00:37:49,360
Speaker 3: the world at large.

785
00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:50,319
Speaker 1: Yeah.

786
00:37:50,360 --> 00:37:53,040
Speaker 3: Well, also, you know, not taking the piss out of

787
00:37:53,320 --> 00:37:57,680
Speaker 3: moments that don't deserve that. But I want her to

788
00:37:57,719 --> 00:38:02,200
Speaker 3: be able to pursue and do whatever she'd like. I

789
00:38:02,239 --> 00:38:08,319
Speaker 3: want her to be happy, and I really want to

790
00:38:08,480 --> 00:38:11,440
Speaker 3: just be there for her so that she could be

791
00:38:11,480 --> 00:38:13,160
Speaker 3: the best version of who she is. I know that's

792
00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:14,359
Speaker 3: very vague.

793
00:38:14,640 --> 00:38:17,799
Speaker 1: Yes, but not to keep guessing you as a dad

794
00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:18,320
Speaker 1: or anything.

795
00:38:18,320 --> 00:38:20,880
Speaker 2: But I'm like, I think in a correct way because

796
00:38:20,920 --> 00:38:23,080
Speaker 2: I think in my again, I say this all the

797
00:38:23,080 --> 00:38:24,799
Speaker 2: time on the podcast, and people are probably like, Ego,

798
00:38:24,880 --> 00:38:26,880
Speaker 2: we know you don't have kids, you're not a parent,

799
00:38:27,160 --> 00:38:28,640
Speaker 2: But I want to say, I'm not a parent. I

800
00:38:28,640 --> 00:38:30,480
Speaker 2: don't know what it's like to be a parent. I

801
00:38:30,520 --> 00:38:33,640
Speaker 2: think that part of being a good one might be

802
00:38:34,040 --> 00:38:37,799
Speaker 2: recognizing that, yes, I'm going to bring this offspring into

803
00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:39,919
Speaker 2: the world, but I'm not going to really be able

804
00:38:39,960 --> 00:38:45,600
Speaker 2: to control who this person becomes. And so for me

805
00:38:45,640 --> 00:38:49,200
Speaker 2: to have all these parameters and such in mind for

806
00:38:49,280 --> 00:38:51,920
Speaker 2: them is maybe like it is like a function of

807
00:38:51,960 --> 00:38:54,279
Speaker 2: wishful thinking or something, and then creates a tension that

808
00:38:54,320 --> 00:38:55,239
Speaker 2: doesn't need to be there.

809
00:38:55,480 --> 00:38:58,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, you think it's like, in an ideal scenario, maybe

810
00:38:58,719 --> 00:39:03,680
Speaker 3: like I can expel her to so many wonderful things

811
00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:08,480
Speaker 3: and ways of perceiving the world and activities and art

812
00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:12,120
Speaker 3: and music and literature. But like, yeah, ultimately I would

813
00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:15,000
Speaker 3: I want it to be I want her to figure

814
00:39:15,000 --> 00:39:15,439
Speaker 3: out what.

815
00:39:15,840 --> 00:39:18,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, what she's into? Yeah yeah. How do you feel

816
00:39:18,400 --> 00:39:20,840
Speaker 2: about discipline? And I don't mean like spanking versus not spanking,

817
00:39:20,840 --> 00:39:24,839
Speaker 2: but in terms of like how spank me, Well, that's

818
00:39:24,840 --> 00:39:28,200
Speaker 2: not discipline, that's something else, Kyle, Oh, at your age, that's.

819
00:39:28,040 --> 00:39:30,440
Speaker 3: Something Greetings, mister Anderson.

820
00:39:30,680 --> 00:39:34,880
Speaker 2: No, no, how do you feel about being the disciplinarian?

821
00:39:34,960 --> 00:39:36,279
Speaker 1: Like and what does it look like to you?

822
00:39:36,600 --> 00:39:39,920
Speaker 3: Are like a time person and like yeah, we've like

823
00:39:40,000 --> 00:39:43,319
Speaker 3: yet to get to that. But like this morning she

824
00:39:44,040 --> 00:39:48,080
Speaker 3: reached into like a little sort of garbage area and

825
00:39:48,120 --> 00:39:51,560
Speaker 3: there was a loose lacroix can and you know that

826
00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:56,919
Speaker 3: little the mouth and yeah, and like I was like no, no, no,

827
00:39:57,360 --> 00:40:00,960
Speaker 3: and like I felt even I didn't love of saying

828
00:40:01,080 --> 00:40:05,120
Speaker 3: no loudly. And I will say, there are a lot

829
00:40:05,200 --> 00:40:09,160
Speaker 3: of you know, parenting philosophies and sort of like I

830
00:40:09,840 --> 00:40:15,800
Speaker 3: think parenting has evolved over several years and like they're

831
00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:20,160
Speaker 3: like they're there are ideas that I'm still hearing and

832
00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:23,279
Speaker 3: learning that like I'm still trying to make sense of

833
00:40:23,640 --> 00:40:27,360
Speaker 3: like for instance, like and this is not something I

834
00:40:27,520 --> 00:40:31,640
Speaker 3: I am great at doing. But there's a whole movement

835
00:40:31,680 --> 00:40:33,640
Speaker 3: to not use the phrase good job.

836
00:40:34,360 --> 00:40:36,960
Speaker 2: Okay, new news to me. I guess why would have

837
00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:39,040
Speaker 2: made its way to me because I don't I just

838
00:40:39,080 --> 00:40:41,279
Speaker 2: have a pup. Do you know about this and try

839
00:40:42,239 --> 00:40:45,000
Speaker 2: the philosophy behind not saying good job?

840
00:40:45,719 --> 00:40:47,000
Speaker 1: It is ever changing.

841
00:40:47,120 --> 00:40:49,799
Speaker 3: I think, Yeah, it's something about how it implies, like

842
00:40:50,520 --> 00:40:52,560
Speaker 3: you picked up the toy ball and you put it

843
00:40:52,600 --> 00:40:55,160
Speaker 3: in the whole good job. Yeah, it's I guess the

844
00:40:55,200 --> 00:40:58,560
Speaker 3: implication is sort of like this is something you're supposed

845
00:40:58,600 --> 00:41:01,600
Speaker 3: to accomplish and you did it right, versus like that

846
00:41:01,680 --> 00:41:04,520
Speaker 3: was that was such a cool thing you did with

847
00:41:04,560 --> 00:41:06,560
Speaker 3: the ball. I don't know. I don't, I don't. I

848
00:41:06,560 --> 00:41:08,520
Speaker 3: actually don't think that's why I'm not good at it

849
00:41:08,520 --> 00:41:09,600
Speaker 3: because I don't have a grass and.

850
00:41:09,640 --> 00:41:10,839
Speaker 1: You also don't subscribe to it.

851
00:41:10,880 --> 00:41:14,239
Speaker 3: Sounds like like I when it's been explained to me,

852
00:41:14,320 --> 00:41:18,000
Speaker 3: I get it, but I'm but like unfortunately, and I

853
00:41:18,040 --> 00:41:22,360
Speaker 3: am not a child psychologist, so I can't claim to

854
00:41:22,360 --> 00:41:25,040
Speaker 3: be an expert on any of this. It's one of

855
00:41:25,080 --> 00:41:27,760
Speaker 3: those things where I'm like, and this is the pessimist

856
00:41:27,800 --> 00:41:30,880
Speaker 3: in me. And you might have some listeners who who

857
00:41:31,440 --> 00:41:35,400
Speaker 3: who can sort of set me straight because.

858
00:41:35,160 --> 00:41:37,759
Speaker 2: I want my listeners to be sweeties personally if I

859
00:41:37,840 --> 00:41:40,160
Speaker 2: was allowed to pick. But I also know, again like parenting,

860
00:41:40,200 --> 00:41:42,680
Speaker 2: you can't pick your kid, can't pick my listener. Yes,

861
00:41:42,800 --> 00:41:44,640
Speaker 2: I want my listeners to be sweeties for me.

862
00:41:44,719 --> 00:41:47,239
Speaker 3: It's just like I guess I kind of have a

863
00:41:47,280 --> 00:41:50,040
Speaker 3: hard time believing like that sort of thing is going

864
00:41:50,120 --> 00:41:52,640
Speaker 3: to like fully set her off on the wrong direction

865
00:41:52,840 --> 00:41:53,560
Speaker 3: somehow right.

866
00:41:54,040 --> 00:41:56,759
Speaker 2: Well, also the fact that it's here's my thing. I'm

867
00:41:56,800 --> 00:42:00,920
Speaker 2: also not a child psychologist. But it's ever changing. And

868
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:04,400
Speaker 2: that's fine because everything is evolving. We're ever changing, everything's

869
00:42:04,400 --> 00:42:08,160
Speaker 2: always changing, whatever people are changing. But the philosophies, because

870
00:42:08,200 --> 00:42:11,880
Speaker 2: then the implication is that like everybody at every stage

871
00:42:11,920 --> 00:42:12,720
Speaker 2: is getting it wrong.

872
00:42:12,920 --> 00:42:14,320
Speaker 1: So that's the implication.

873
00:42:14,520 --> 00:42:17,040
Speaker 2: The Yeah, like as we go on this, we still

874
00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:19,440
Speaker 2: we will continue to never ever ever get it right

875
00:42:19,520 --> 00:42:21,279
Speaker 2: or have a sense of what is even right or

876
00:42:21,280 --> 00:42:21,600
Speaker 2: the right.

877
00:42:21,520 --> 00:42:24,080
Speaker 1: Way to do it with parenting, because that's absolutely yeah.

878
00:42:24,120 --> 00:42:27,000
Speaker 3: And like a great example of that to me is

879
00:42:27,160 --> 00:42:30,400
Speaker 3: which I do agree with, but is like, you know,

880
00:42:30,920 --> 00:42:35,080
Speaker 3: no screen time until I feel like maybe now it's

881
00:42:35,160 --> 00:42:37,840
Speaker 3: like two years old, I'm not sure what like the

882
00:42:37,880 --> 00:42:38,640
Speaker 3: recommendation is.

883
00:42:38,840 --> 00:42:39,080
Speaker 1: Yeah.

884
00:42:39,160 --> 00:42:44,280
Speaker 3: The thing is I watched so much TV and film

885
00:42:44,320 --> 00:42:48,879
Speaker 3: growing up, and it is why I do what I do.

886
00:42:49,000 --> 00:42:53,320
Speaker 3: So it's like I definitely can understand how it's unhealthy

887
00:42:53,360 --> 00:42:55,279
Speaker 3: and I agree with that. And I also think that

888
00:42:55,400 --> 00:42:59,280
Speaker 3: like screens have evolved, you know, it's it's not necessary,

889
00:42:59,600 --> 00:43:01,680
Speaker 3: it's it's it's maybe different, But there's a lot more

890
00:43:01,840 --> 00:43:04,920
Speaker 3: I would already built most of my career out of

891
00:43:05,040 --> 00:43:07,839
Speaker 3: like TV shows I watched in nineteen ninety two.

892
00:43:08,120 --> 00:43:10,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, I was walking yesterday.

893
00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:11,759
Speaker 2: I've never thought about this because I feel like I

894
00:43:11,800 --> 00:43:14,000
Speaker 2: don't watch a lot now, which kind of sucks. And

895
00:43:14,040 --> 00:43:15,520
Speaker 2: I don't know if it's like because we do what

896
00:43:15,560 --> 00:43:18,160
Speaker 2: we do and then free when I think about my

897
00:43:18,160 --> 00:43:20,160
Speaker 2: free time, maybe like, oh, I don't necessarily want to

898
00:43:20,160 --> 00:43:21,799
Speaker 2: watch the thing in my free time because it's like

899
00:43:21,880 --> 00:43:25,080
Speaker 2: my world now. But I was on a walk yesterday

900
00:43:25,080 --> 00:43:28,319
Speaker 2: and I go, I would literally Saturday morning, my mom

901
00:43:28,400 --> 00:43:31,200
Speaker 2: wasn't even up, like, and I'd go turn on Saturday

902
00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:33,440
Speaker 2: Morning cartoons and sit with my pop Tart in front

903
00:43:33,480 --> 00:43:34,279
Speaker 2: of the TV for.

904
00:43:34,480 --> 00:43:37,400
Speaker 1: Hours, and I think I'm fine. I don't know. I

905
00:43:37,400 --> 00:43:40,000
Speaker 1: think it's okay, dude, you're killing it with the podcast.

906
00:43:40,160 --> 00:43:41,560
Speaker 1: I got a freaking podcast now.

907
00:43:41,600 --> 00:43:43,399
Speaker 3: I actually want to. I don't know how much time

908
00:43:43,440 --> 00:43:46,560
Speaker 3: we have, but can we look up the Good Job thing? Yes?

909
00:43:46,800 --> 00:43:48,600
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, a ya guess please tell us.

910
00:43:48,680 --> 00:43:51,480
Speaker 4: I guess you want to focus on what they're doing

911
00:43:51,560 --> 00:43:53,240
Speaker 4: and not just that they did it and you're praising

912
00:43:53,239 --> 00:43:55,600
Speaker 4: them for having done it correctly, but you want to

913
00:43:55,640 --> 00:43:57,640
Speaker 4: be like I saw that you did that all by yourself,

914
00:43:57,760 --> 00:43:59,400
Speaker 4: or I saw that you worked really hard at this,

915
00:43:59,480 --> 00:44:01,960
Speaker 4: So it's like there's no good job, bad job. It's

916
00:44:02,040 --> 00:44:04,200
Speaker 4: like you tried your best, you did it.

917
00:44:04,280 --> 00:44:05,719
Speaker 1: I guess it's I mean, who knows.

918
00:44:05,719 --> 00:44:08,480
Speaker 4: I don't have kids, but I'm like, yeah, sometimes you

919
00:44:08,480 --> 00:44:09,799
Speaker 4: you did it, and you did a good job, even

920
00:44:09,840 --> 00:44:11,520
Speaker 4: if you didn't do it all the way, right.

921
00:44:11,680 --> 00:44:17,320
Speaker 2: I guess this begs the question that deeply philosophical point

922
00:44:17,360 --> 00:44:20,839
Speaker 2: of view. I'm like, when you say good job, good

923
00:44:20,880 --> 00:44:23,520
Speaker 2: job is not a complete sentence. Are you saying good job?

924
00:44:23,600 --> 00:44:26,960
Speaker 2: I think it's good good job for trying, good job

925
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:29,880
Speaker 2: because the ball went in the hole, good job because

926
00:44:29,920 --> 00:44:32,360
Speaker 2: like it's not a complete sentence. So to be like

927
00:44:32,480 --> 00:44:34,960
Speaker 2: let's let's keep the shy away from saying good jobs

928
00:44:35,040 --> 00:44:37,719
Speaker 2: is like I think things are getting out of hand,

929
00:44:38,280 --> 00:44:41,400
Speaker 2: just like let's all relax. I think you can, you

930
00:44:41,440 --> 00:44:45,200
Speaker 2: can decide for yourself. But the child psychologists are at

931
00:44:45,239 --> 00:44:46,359
Speaker 2: the very least I do.

932
00:44:46,960 --> 00:44:50,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think there's something to be said about, like

933
00:44:51,280 --> 00:44:53,960
Speaker 3: find other ways to say the same thing, you know

934
00:44:54,000 --> 00:44:54,440
Speaker 3: what I mean?

935
00:44:54,600 --> 00:44:56,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, but then it's gonna be I don't know.

936
00:44:56,400 --> 00:44:58,279
Speaker 2: In my mind, I'm like, yes, we'll find other ways

937
00:44:58,320 --> 00:45:00,200
Speaker 2: to say the same thing, but then it's gonna be like, well,

938
00:45:00,280 --> 00:45:03,680
Speaker 2: not that either, because that's man, you're going to raise

939
00:45:03,680 --> 00:45:04,400
Speaker 2: a serial killer.

940
00:45:04,600 --> 00:45:06,560
Speaker 1: Yeah. I just feel like that's a lot of stress.

941
00:45:06,640 --> 00:45:09,440
Speaker 2: When I think about parenting books, I'm like, there's so

942
00:45:09,760 --> 00:45:14,759
Speaker 2: many philosophies and schools of thought that if if I

943
00:45:14,840 --> 00:45:17,360
Speaker 2: were a parent, I could just imagine feeling a little

944
00:45:17,640 --> 00:45:19,440
Speaker 2: overwhelmed by that. If I was trying to be like,

945
00:45:19,480 --> 00:45:20,960
Speaker 2: I really want to get this right, I want to

946
00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:23,520
Speaker 2: really nail this parent thing, I'd be like, ah, there's

947
00:45:23,920 --> 00:45:26,680
Speaker 2: because if I read this book that was published within

948
00:45:26,800 --> 00:45:29,080
Speaker 2: three years of this book, these who are totally contradicting

949
00:45:29,080 --> 00:45:29,440
Speaker 2: each other.

950
00:45:29,560 --> 00:45:31,560
Speaker 1: So it is up to you in.

951
00:45:31,480 --> 00:45:33,560
Speaker 2: A way, And how do you feel about the thought

952
00:45:33,600 --> 00:45:35,399
Speaker 2: that like you're going to kind of mess your kid

953
00:45:35,480 --> 00:45:36,399
Speaker 2: up in some way?

954
00:45:36,800 --> 00:45:39,000
Speaker 1: Do you agree with that or feel it?

955
00:45:39,920 --> 00:45:42,479
Speaker 2: I kind of sometimes think like, yeah, I'm a little

956
00:45:42,520 --> 00:45:45,440
Speaker 2: bit of the mind, yeah, because I feel yeah, because

957
00:45:45,440 --> 00:45:48,440
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, well, we have therapy now, and we

958
00:45:48,520 --> 00:45:50,840
Speaker 2: we we therapy was available for a long time, but

959
00:45:50,920 --> 00:45:53,799
Speaker 2: now it's not. The stigma around therapy is not the

960
00:45:53,840 --> 00:45:56,200
Speaker 2: same as it was when we were coming up, and

961
00:45:56,400 --> 00:46:01,120
Speaker 2: now we're doing our own deep dives on ourselves and

962
00:46:01,160 --> 00:46:04,240
Speaker 2: our histories and finding a way to use our language

963
00:46:04,280 --> 00:46:06,359
Speaker 2: and excavate our own feelings, et cetera, et cetera.

964
00:46:06,600 --> 00:46:07,720
Speaker 1: Yes, all of that is true.

965
00:46:07,880 --> 00:46:11,600
Speaker 2: And because I'm an imperfect human who is going to

966
00:46:11,640 --> 00:46:15,359
Speaker 2: raise another person, it's also going to be imperfect no

967
00:46:15,400 --> 00:46:16,759
Speaker 2: matter how much research I.

968
00:46:16,760 --> 00:46:18,400
Speaker 1: Do and how much work I do on myself.

969
00:46:18,480 --> 00:46:23,359
Speaker 2: Of course, you know, do you want your daughter to

970
00:46:23,760 --> 00:46:26,719
Speaker 2: count you a friend just because I'm like comedians?

971
00:46:26,719 --> 00:46:29,520
Speaker 1: Do we want our kids to be like the homie

972
00:46:29,960 --> 00:46:30,399
Speaker 1: or do you.

973
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:32,120
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, I was gonna while you were saying that,

974
00:46:32,200 --> 00:46:35,120
Speaker 3: it made me think about, like, yeah, how many folks

975
00:46:35,160 --> 00:46:37,840
Speaker 3: do you know who are like who are very close

976
00:46:37,880 --> 00:46:39,480
Speaker 3: friends with their parents? Because I know a couple of

977
00:46:39,480 --> 00:46:42,320
Speaker 3: people that it's like like, like, there they are homies,

978
00:46:42,360 --> 00:46:42,560
Speaker 3: you know.

979
00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:43,560
Speaker 1: Yeah.

980
00:46:44,080 --> 00:46:48,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I feel very close with my father. My

981
00:46:48,239 --> 00:46:53,640
Speaker 3: mother's no longer with me us, but her as well,

982
00:46:53,680 --> 00:46:56,879
Speaker 3: like I felt like she was. We were definitely buddies. Yeah,

983
00:46:56,920 --> 00:46:59,800
Speaker 3: but not in the way that it's like hey, picking

984
00:46:59,880 --> 00:47:02,520
Speaker 3: up some uh palm this weekend?

985
00:47:02,880 --> 00:47:05,000
Speaker 1: Yeah you know what, Yeah, exactly.

986
00:47:05,080 --> 00:47:06,960
Speaker 2: It's funny because that's I feel very close to my

987
00:47:07,120 --> 00:47:08,919
Speaker 2: mom too, But like yeah, as my mom.

988
00:47:09,320 --> 00:47:11,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, and so that's yeah. But I think there are

989
00:47:11,040 --> 00:47:15,000
Speaker 3: other people who are like, no, we're buddies, and I'm I'm.

990
00:47:14,840 --> 00:47:17,680
Speaker 2: Fascinated by that. I think if it works for people, great.

991
00:47:18,000 --> 00:47:20,480
Speaker 2: I'm always curious like when did that begin? Was it

992
00:47:20,560 --> 00:47:22,880
Speaker 2: like you turned you graduated college, and then you became

993
00:47:22,960 --> 00:47:26,279
Speaker 2: the homie or was it always sort of like I

994
00:47:26,320 --> 00:47:28,680
Speaker 2: don't know. My parents didn't really shield me from too

995
00:47:28,719 --> 00:47:31,040
Speaker 2: too much, and I've always just kind of been their homie.

996
00:47:31,080 --> 00:47:34,239
Speaker 2: I was their little homie at five. Now I'm the

997
00:47:34,280 --> 00:47:37,120
Speaker 2: big homie. Yeah, Like it's so, yeah.

998
00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:40,239
Speaker 3: I would like to be friends with So you like that, Like.

999
00:47:40,200 --> 00:47:42,320
Speaker 1: You want your daughter to be like my dad's my homie.

1000
00:47:42,600 --> 00:47:46,040
Speaker 3: I definitely I would like it to be. You know,

1001
00:47:46,160 --> 00:47:47,520
Speaker 3: oh he's cool. Yeah, we have fun.

1002
00:47:47,960 --> 00:47:51,040
Speaker 1: Okay, Like okay, so homie like can tell you?

1003
00:47:51,400 --> 00:47:52,759
Speaker 2: Would you want her to be able to tell you

1004
00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:54,759
Speaker 2: like anything everything.

1005
00:47:55,800 --> 00:47:58,319
Speaker 3: My my brother has a very good relationship with his

1006
00:47:58,400 --> 00:48:01,239
Speaker 3: kids where I think they do tell him like, uh,

1007
00:48:02,000 --> 00:48:04,360
Speaker 3: you know, Mark was being weird to me today, like

1008
00:48:04,600 --> 00:48:06,760
Speaker 3: do you think he likes like kind of like Gandle

1009
00:48:06,840 --> 00:48:09,879
Speaker 3: like kind of crushes and and that sort of stuff. Yeah,

1010
00:48:10,320 --> 00:48:13,399
Speaker 3: I would like to be there for her if that's

1011
00:48:13,560 --> 00:48:16,120
Speaker 3: what she wants. I don't. I don't feel like I

1012
00:48:16,239 --> 00:48:19,440
Speaker 3: need to necessarily know the ins and outs of like

1013
00:48:20,200 --> 00:48:23,840
Speaker 3: when she's like seventeen to nineteen years old, Like I

1014
00:48:23,880 --> 00:48:27,880
Speaker 3: feel like, yeah, there's some information, and I'd be like, Okay.

1015
00:48:27,640 --> 00:48:29,400
Speaker 1: It's cool, Okay.

1016
00:48:29,719 --> 00:48:31,879
Speaker 2: I feel inclined to ask you, even though I feel

1017
00:48:31,920 --> 00:48:35,640
Speaker 2: I fully understand it. Yeah, I feel I do why

1018
00:48:35,760 --> 00:48:37,840
Speaker 2: that you're like, I would like her to feel like

1019
00:48:37,880 --> 00:48:39,680
Speaker 2: she could, but I also feel like there's something that

1020
00:48:39,960 --> 00:48:40,799
Speaker 2: I don't need to know.

1021
00:48:41,040 --> 00:48:42,600
Speaker 1: What do you think that is for you?

1022
00:48:42,960 --> 00:48:46,680
Speaker 3: For me? Well, growing up, I think I was private

1023
00:48:46,719 --> 00:48:48,600
Speaker 3: in that way. I didn't want to, like I kind

1024
00:48:48,640 --> 00:48:50,640
Speaker 3: of didn't want to talk to my parents about it

1025
00:48:50,680 --> 00:48:54,880
Speaker 3: because they did feel far away from it. Though, like

1026
00:48:55,520 --> 00:48:57,200
Speaker 3: now being on the other side of it, it's like,

1027
00:48:57,800 --> 00:49:00,160
Speaker 3: you know, you know my brother, for instance, her he's

1028
00:49:00,239 --> 00:49:02,920
Speaker 3: kids are I think one's going to be a sophomore

1029
00:49:02,920 --> 00:49:05,560
Speaker 3: in high school, one the other maybe in eighth grader,

1030
00:49:05,840 --> 00:49:08,560
Speaker 3: And it's like that doesn't feel that far away from

1031
00:49:08,560 --> 00:49:11,400
Speaker 3: me right now. I can remember seventh and eighth grade

1032
00:49:11,640 --> 00:49:16,600
Speaker 3: like it actually feels almost recent. So like that's maybe

1033
00:49:16,640 --> 00:49:18,640
Speaker 3: not a fair thought that I had when I was

1034
00:49:18,640 --> 00:49:20,880
Speaker 3: in seventh grade to think that, like my parents wouldn't

1035
00:49:20,960 --> 00:49:24,279
Speaker 3: get what I was like, yeah, going through But I

1036
00:49:24,320 --> 00:49:26,480
Speaker 3: but I like, I don't know. I guess I thought

1037
00:49:26,520 --> 00:49:30,879
Speaker 3: that's what my like other say, similar aged friends were for.

1038
00:49:31,080 --> 00:49:33,600
Speaker 3: I don't know that I've spent enough time thinking about

1039
00:49:33,640 --> 00:49:35,360
Speaker 3: this to know that I have like a hearty.

1040
00:49:35,160 --> 00:49:39,440
Speaker 1: Fast yeah, she's fourteen months ago over that.

1041
00:49:39,760 --> 00:49:42,320
Speaker 3: Like I also, I think, like I guess, I feel

1042
00:49:42,320 --> 00:49:46,480
Speaker 3: like it's also okay for her to have secrets, do

1043
00:49:46,480 --> 00:49:49,200
Speaker 3: you know what I mean? As long as they're not dangerous.

1044
00:49:49,280 --> 00:49:52,680
Speaker 1: She's in dangerous sure, yeah, yeah, yeah, I just I

1045
00:49:52,719 --> 00:49:56,799
Speaker 1: just remember being like even early twenties talking with friends,

1046
00:49:56,880 --> 00:49:59,160
Speaker 1: and all of them were women at the time with

1047
00:49:59,200 --> 00:50:00,600
Speaker 1: whom I was having these conversations.

1048
00:50:00,600 --> 00:50:04,319
Speaker 2: But I would be like, oh, yeah, I don't know.

1049
00:50:05,160 --> 00:50:06,920
Speaker 2: Even at twenty something, I was like, I don't When

1050
00:50:06,960 --> 00:50:08,520
Speaker 2: I do have a daughter, I don't know that I

1051
00:50:08,560 --> 00:50:10,560
Speaker 2: need her to tell me all that we're talking about

1052
00:50:10,640 --> 00:50:11,200
Speaker 2: right now.

1053
00:50:11,120 --> 00:50:13,719
Speaker 1: Right, I don't need it. I don't like.

1054
00:50:13,800 --> 00:50:16,319
Speaker 3: I actually kind of yeah, I'll like it. I don't

1055
00:50:16,400 --> 00:50:20,000
Speaker 3: need to hear it when she's sixteen. Yeah, I would

1056
00:50:20,000 --> 00:50:22,200
Speaker 3: probably get more kick out of it. Like when she's

1057
00:50:22,280 --> 00:50:24,120
Speaker 3: like thirty years old and tell me about it. I

1058
00:50:24,120 --> 00:50:27,200
Speaker 3: was like, you did that. You should stink.

1059
00:50:26,880 --> 00:50:34,000
Speaker 1: It you as an old dad iconic Kyle.

1060
00:50:34,239 --> 00:50:38,120
Speaker 2: Okay, I can see it because you do the voice already.

1061
00:50:38,360 --> 00:50:41,920
Speaker 2: That'll be your voice for real, the one you just did.

1062
00:50:41,960 --> 00:50:44,359
Speaker 2: I also feel like when you get old, I don't

1063
00:50:44,360 --> 00:50:46,640
Speaker 2: mean to put this on you that you'll just lean

1064
00:50:46,920 --> 00:50:54,640
Speaker 2: so hard into being old like an old man character. Heay, Kyle,

1065
00:50:55,000 --> 00:50:56,560
Speaker 2: thank you for being my dad for the day and

1066
00:50:56,640 --> 00:50:59,400
Speaker 2: every episode asking my dad for the day for a

1067
00:50:59,480 --> 00:51:01,680
Speaker 2: piece of advice. So may I ask you I have

1068
00:51:01,719 --> 00:51:03,840
Speaker 2: a thing I want to tell you about from my

1069
00:51:03,880 --> 00:51:05,120
Speaker 2: life and then maybe you can advise you.

1070
00:51:05,200 --> 00:51:09,680
Speaker 1: Yes, okay, so interrupt me please.

1071
00:51:10,000 --> 00:51:12,560
Speaker 3: You've you've done at least one of these today. I've

1072
00:51:12,600 --> 00:51:14,200
Speaker 3: done at least one, and so you had to come

1073
00:51:14,280 --> 00:51:16,160
Speaker 3: up with a list of like different things you're going

1074
00:51:16,160 --> 00:51:16,719
Speaker 3: through right now.

1075
00:51:18,640 --> 00:51:20,040
Speaker 1: What a thoughtful fucking dad.

1076
00:51:20,160 --> 00:51:23,200
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, some of the things I'm asking the dads,

1077
00:51:23,239 --> 00:51:25,920
Speaker 2: I will say, though, too, do not pertain to my

1078
00:51:26,080 --> 00:51:29,400
Speaker 2: present life and may not even I try not to

1079
00:51:29,440 --> 00:51:31,040
Speaker 2: ask my dad's anything because I'm like, this is a

1080
00:51:31,080 --> 00:51:32,840
Speaker 2: huge opportunity to be able to ask a dad for

1081
00:51:32,920 --> 00:51:35,640
Speaker 2: this advice. Honestly, to me, I try not to ask

1082
00:51:35,640 --> 00:51:38,839
Speaker 2: the dads anything that's like so far fetched does not

1083
00:51:38,880 --> 00:51:42,160
Speaker 2: pertain to my life at all, or anything that like

1084
00:51:42,280 --> 00:51:44,400
Speaker 2: really will never pertain to my life and the person

1085
00:51:44,440 --> 00:51:46,680
Speaker 2: I am and whatever. But some of the things I'm

1086
00:51:46,719 --> 00:51:49,319
Speaker 2: asking are like, Ooh, this is something that'll be good

1087
00:51:49,360 --> 00:51:51,160
Speaker 2: for down the line. I might not be dealing with

1088
00:51:51,200 --> 00:51:53,360
Speaker 2: it right now, but I maybe either will be or

1089
00:51:53,400 --> 00:51:56,120
Speaker 2: I have, And it would have been nice to ask advice.

1090
00:51:56,400 --> 00:51:56,800
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1091
00:51:56,880 --> 00:51:59,759
Speaker 2: I was on FaceTime with my mom and she's like,

1092
00:51:59,760 --> 00:52:01,960
Speaker 2: what's that like bump in your neck? You should go

1093
00:52:02,000 --> 00:52:04,200
Speaker 2: get that checked out? Okay, so go get it checked out.

1094
00:52:04,440 --> 00:52:05,120
Speaker 2: It's nothing.

1095
00:52:05,440 --> 00:52:08,439
Speaker 1: According to whatever doctor I went to on the Upper

1096
00:52:08,440 --> 00:52:11,640
Speaker 1: West Side, I should out them. I don't know.

1097
00:52:12,440 --> 00:52:14,799
Speaker 2: I feel like I see every doctor one time, like

1098
00:52:14,840 --> 00:52:16,359
Speaker 2: when they're like, who's your primary care?

1099
00:52:16,920 --> 00:52:18,319
Speaker 1: Maybe that should be my question for you, mayb.

1100
00:52:18,320 --> 00:52:20,600
Speaker 2: I'm would ask you two questions about health today and

1101
00:52:20,680 --> 00:52:21,200
Speaker 2: every time.

1102
00:52:21,400 --> 00:52:22,440
Speaker 1: But this is the thing about it.

1103
00:52:22,480 --> 00:52:24,719
Speaker 2: You seem like you made a sound to suggest you're

1104
00:52:24,800 --> 00:52:27,239
Speaker 2: you're not equipped to answer those questions. But this is

1105
00:52:27,239 --> 00:52:29,520
Speaker 2: a fascinating thing because if you were my dad and

1106
00:52:29,560 --> 00:52:32,560
Speaker 2: I came to you, would you say to me, I'm

1107
00:52:32,600 --> 00:52:34,560
Speaker 2: not the right person to ask, or would you pretend

1108
00:52:35,360 --> 00:52:38,080
Speaker 2: let's see, yeah, put your arm up and that confident

1109
00:52:39,480 --> 00:52:42,799
Speaker 2: Come on, Papa bear, Okay, So okay, Question number one.

1110
00:52:42,840 --> 00:52:45,400
Speaker 2: I always bounce around from doctor to doctor. I'm not

1111
00:52:45,640 --> 00:52:48,319
Speaker 2: loyal to any of them. Should I try to find

1112
00:52:48,320 --> 00:52:51,480
Speaker 2: a primary care? Would you say I should? And if so,

1113
00:52:51,719 --> 00:52:55,040
Speaker 2: if yes, how do you go about finding a primary

1114
00:52:55,080 --> 00:52:59,279
Speaker 2: care for real? A good one two part question, and

1115
00:52:59,320 --> 00:53:00,000
Speaker 2: there's another coming.

1116
00:53:01,360 --> 00:53:05,320
Speaker 3: I think it would probably be good to find somebody

1117
00:53:05,400 --> 00:53:11,239
Speaker 3: who can know your history, okay, so that there's a

1118
00:53:11,280 --> 00:53:13,600
Speaker 3: point of reference in your visits.

1119
00:53:13,800 --> 00:53:14,800
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1120
00:53:14,840 --> 00:53:18,720
Speaker 3: With that being said, m h, if you are feeling

1121
00:53:18,920 --> 00:53:21,719
Speaker 3: safe sort of going doctor to doctor, how are you

1122
00:53:21,760 --> 00:53:22,920
Speaker 3: finding your doctors currently?

1123
00:53:23,440 --> 00:53:26,560
Speaker 1: So I'll go on the insurance website and i will

1124
00:53:26,960 --> 00:53:32,880
Speaker 1: SAG SAG insurance screen. I'm still on SAG. I'm a

1125
00:53:33,000 --> 00:53:33,680
Speaker 1: SAG mama.

1126
00:53:34,160 --> 00:53:36,319
Speaker 2: And I go through and I see who in my

1127
00:53:37,000 --> 00:53:39,400
Speaker 2: I try to Actually I don't do my radius, but

1128
00:53:39,480 --> 00:53:41,560
Speaker 2: like who in New York. I think Upper west Side

1129
00:53:41,560 --> 00:53:43,439
Speaker 2: in my mind, Upper west Side has good doctors because

1130
00:53:43,440 --> 00:53:45,839
Speaker 2: those are like family people. For the people who live

1131
00:53:45,840 --> 00:53:48,439
Speaker 2: on the Upper west Side are family oriented. Yeah, maybe

1132
00:53:48,520 --> 00:53:50,239
Speaker 2: Upper East Side. I'll go on there and I'll put

1133
00:53:50,280 --> 00:53:52,040
Speaker 2: in the zip code and then I'll be like, Okay,

1134
00:53:52,120 --> 00:53:53,800
Speaker 2: I don't know. And then I'll go look at reviews

1135
00:53:53,800 --> 00:53:55,839
Speaker 2: of that doctor and then be like, Okay, people seem

1136
00:53:55,880 --> 00:53:56,560
Speaker 2: to like them.

1137
00:53:56,640 --> 00:54:00,000
Speaker 3: And when you see a doctor like this, do you

1138
00:54:00,920 --> 00:54:04,080
Speaker 3: are you rating the experience in your head as you

1139
00:54:04,320 --> 00:54:07,160
Speaker 3: are as you're going through it? Are you ever like, Okay,

1140
00:54:07,200 --> 00:54:09,440
Speaker 3: possibly I could come back to this person or you

1141
00:54:09,480 --> 00:54:11,279
Speaker 3: are you thinking of it as a one and done thing.

1142
00:54:11,760 --> 00:54:14,320
Speaker 2: I'm thinking possibly I could come back to this person.

1143
00:54:14,440 --> 00:54:16,640
Speaker 2: But I feel like I've been burned too many times

1144
00:54:16,680 --> 00:54:20,040
Speaker 2: in that anytime. Am I allowed to tell you I

1145
00:54:20,040 --> 00:54:22,960
Speaker 2: see an obgyn? Or does that feel like a boundary?

1146
00:54:23,239 --> 00:54:24,000
Speaker 3: You can't tell me that?

1147
00:54:24,120 --> 00:54:25,960
Speaker 1: Okay?

1148
00:54:26,320 --> 00:54:27,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, of course.

1149
00:54:27,239 --> 00:54:29,920
Speaker 2: So I saw an obgyn and I kept being like,

1150
00:54:30,000 --> 00:54:32,480
Speaker 2: I should find one because I'll be in New York

1151
00:54:32,560 --> 00:54:35,440
Speaker 2: for at least seven years on this shop, so I

1152
00:54:35,480 --> 00:54:39,920
Speaker 2: should find one at SNL, I should find one, and

1153
00:54:40,000 --> 00:54:41,640
Speaker 2: I go to them, be going okay, this, I could

1154
00:54:41,680 --> 00:54:43,000
Speaker 2: possibly come back to this person.

1155
00:54:43,239 --> 00:54:44,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I feel like the.

1156
00:54:44,840 --> 00:54:47,560
Speaker 2: Three times I've been like I'll come back to this person,

1157
00:54:48,040 --> 00:54:50,640
Speaker 2: I've gotten burned in that that person is like, I

1158
00:54:50,719 --> 00:54:53,239
Speaker 2: try to make another appointment a year later, and they're like,

1159
00:54:53,560 --> 00:54:56,640
Speaker 2: I moved to northern California. I'm out of here. I'm

1160
00:54:56,680 --> 00:54:59,520
Speaker 2: only operating out of Long Island anymore moving forward, and

1161
00:54:59,560 --> 00:55:01,279
Speaker 2: so that's sucks. And so now I feel like, why

1162
00:55:01,360 --> 00:55:03,319
Speaker 2: bother trying to find a primary care if they're all

1163
00:55:03,360 --> 00:55:03,960
Speaker 2: just gonna leave.

1164
00:55:04,200 --> 00:55:08,680
Speaker 3: Yeah to me as your father, but also hopefully as

1165
00:55:08,680 --> 00:55:13,320
Speaker 3: your friend. Yes, my recommendation, yes, would be to utilize

1166
00:55:13,360 --> 00:55:16,680
Speaker 3: those resources around you, persons that you know and trust.

1167
00:55:16,840 --> 00:55:20,280
Speaker 1: Okay, ask them, okay, who.

1168
00:55:20,080 --> 00:55:21,960
Speaker 3: They are, seeing how they feel about them.

1169
00:55:22,160 --> 00:55:24,240
Speaker 1: Okay, Okay, that's great, that's great advice.

1170
00:55:24,320 --> 00:55:27,200
Speaker 3: Sorry, I mean that's that's pretty obvious to some degree.

1171
00:55:27,440 --> 00:55:29,960
Speaker 2: Sure, but it's not what I'm doing though, really either.

1172
00:55:30,000 --> 00:55:32,440
Speaker 2: And I think, like I've asked once, I asked someone

1173
00:55:32,440 --> 00:55:35,520
Speaker 2: about an ob gy and my agent actually I'm close

1174
00:55:35,560 --> 00:55:37,920
Speaker 2: to my agent, and she was like, I can get you,

1175
00:55:38,120 --> 00:55:40,200
Speaker 2: like I can tell you a person, but I don't

1176
00:55:40,280 --> 00:55:42,720
Speaker 2: think that they're like You're gonna go in the office

1177
00:55:42,719 --> 00:55:45,160
Speaker 2: and be like, what's up here? This is what's going on.

1178
00:55:45,440 --> 00:55:47,920
Speaker 2: I've been transported to another time in not necessarily a

1179
00:55:47,920 --> 00:55:49,880
Speaker 2: good way. So then I'm like, okay, what seems like

1180
00:55:50,000 --> 00:55:52,800
Speaker 2: is anyone into their doctors? Do you like your doctor?

1181
00:55:53,680 --> 00:55:57,120
Speaker 3: I I don't have a proper primary care position. I

1182
00:55:57,160 --> 00:55:57,720
Speaker 3: have somebody.

1183
00:55:57,840 --> 00:55:59,880
Speaker 1: So this is a classic do as I say, not

1184
00:56:00,040 --> 00:56:04,000
Speaker 1: as I do, Dad, Well, because you told me I

1185
00:56:04,040 --> 00:56:04,960
Speaker 1: should try.

1186
00:56:04,719 --> 00:56:07,480
Speaker 3: To Had we started there, I would have been open

1187
00:56:07,520 --> 00:56:13,560
Speaker 3: with you about my situation. But like, I'm also like

1188
00:56:13,680 --> 00:56:16,000
Speaker 3: trying to help you and I but you know what

1189
00:56:16,040 --> 00:56:20,160
Speaker 3: I do do in any regard, I almost always try

1190
00:56:20,200 --> 00:56:23,319
Speaker 3: to reach out to persons who I think might have

1191
00:56:23,560 --> 00:56:25,879
Speaker 3: the answer that I need, okay, And like, as your father,

1192
00:56:25,960 --> 00:56:27,920
Speaker 3: I got to say, I'm not always going to have

1193
00:56:27,960 --> 00:56:31,040
Speaker 3: the answer, okay, but yes, one thing I've learned over

1194
00:56:31,560 --> 00:56:34,319
Speaker 3: over time is that often there is somebody out there

1195
00:56:34,560 --> 00:56:37,879
Speaker 3: who can't help you, who has something that can maybe

1196
00:56:38,000 --> 00:56:40,840
Speaker 3: lead you in the right direction. And this is you know,

1197
00:56:40,960 --> 00:56:45,600
Speaker 3: not even just with doctors. In raising you and my

1198
00:56:45,680 --> 00:56:49,840
Speaker 3: other child, my baby daughter, that's you know, finding Gammy.

1199
00:56:50,000 --> 00:56:53,160
Speaker 1: By the way, what happened? Was I the mistake or

1200
00:56:53,200 --> 00:56:54,120
Speaker 1: was she the mistake?

1201
00:56:54,320 --> 00:56:55,200
Speaker 3: There are no mistakes?

1202
00:56:55,239 --> 00:57:02,600
Speaker 2: Okay, thanks Dad, think said, uh, you know there's a gap,

1203
00:57:02,719 --> 00:57:07,640
Speaker 2: a thirty five year gap. Someone's a mistake, someone's an

1204
00:57:08,520 --> 00:57:11,400
Speaker 2: you're thirty five. I'm thirty six and she's fourteen months.

1205
00:57:11,600 --> 00:57:14,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I'm forty and you're you're forty.

1206
00:57:14,680 --> 00:57:17,000
Speaker 1: I think I was rock hard for you. You were

1207
00:57:17,000 --> 00:57:17,920
Speaker 1: a rock hard.

1208
00:57:19,240 --> 00:57:19,560
Speaker 3: Guys.

1209
00:57:19,600 --> 00:57:20,480
Speaker 1: This has been Kyle.

1210
00:57:20,800 --> 00:57:23,000
Speaker 2: We actually do need another piece of advice. Do I

1211
00:57:23,000 --> 00:57:24,560
Speaker 2: need to get a second opinion about the lump? Then

1212
00:57:24,600 --> 00:57:26,360
Speaker 2: one doctor says it's nothing, and I was like, that's

1213
00:57:26,360 --> 00:57:27,560
Speaker 2: what I like to hear. I'm not going to go

1214
00:57:27,640 --> 00:57:29,600
Speaker 2: see anyone else. Should I get a second opinion?

1215
00:57:29,640 --> 00:57:31,240
Speaker 3: I bet you're fine, but it doesn't hurt to get

1216
00:57:31,240 --> 00:57:31,720
Speaker 3: a second.

1217
00:57:31,760 --> 00:57:34,840
Speaker 2: Okay, cool, Okay, guys, Kyle Mooney has been my dad

1218
00:57:34,880 --> 00:57:37,400
Speaker 2: for the day. Kyle, is there anything you want to plug?

1219
00:57:37,680 --> 00:57:39,800
Speaker 2: We know why two K's coming out later this year.

1220
00:57:39,800 --> 00:57:40,840
Speaker 1: We're very excited.

1221
00:57:41,320 --> 00:57:44,120
Speaker 3: I do think this rock hard four year old could

1222
00:57:44,160 --> 00:57:46,280
Speaker 3: be something else. I'll try to pitch it at the

1223
00:57:46,320 --> 00:57:49,040
Speaker 3: show Y two K December sixth.

1224
00:57:48,880 --> 00:57:50,960
Speaker 1: Okay, rock hard four year old as well? You want,

1225
00:57:51,280 --> 00:57:58,320
Speaker 1: Kyle Mooney, that's his pitch. Okay, Okay, thank you so much, Kyle. Thanks.

1226
00:57:58,320 --> 00:58:01,240
Speaker 1: Stat is a headgun podcast created and hosted by me

1227
00:58:01,440 --> 00:58:04,520
Speaker 1: Ago Wodhem. The show is produced and edited by Anita

1228
00:58:04,560 --> 00:58:08,200
Speaker 1: Flores and engineered by Anita Flores and Anya Kanevskaya, with

1229
00:58:08,360 --> 00:58:11,920
Speaker 1: executive producer Emma Foley. Katie Moose is our VP of

1230
00:58:11,960 --> 00:58:15,120
Speaker 1: Content at Headgum. Thanks to Jason Mathney for our show

1231
00:58:15,240 --> 00:58:18,560
Speaker 1: art and Faris Monschi for our theme song. For more

1232
00:58:18,640 --> 00:58:22,440
Speaker 1: podcasts by Headgum, visit headgum dot com or wherever you

1233
00:58:22,480 --> 00:58:25,000
Speaker 1: listen to your favorite shows. Leave us a review on

1234
00:58:25,080 --> 00:58:29,440
Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts, and maybe, just maybe we'll read it on

1235
00:58:29,440 --> 00:58:33,480
Speaker 1: a future episode that was a headgum podcast