WEBVTT - Black Friday = Corporate Propaganda, EDM Pope 11.28.25 0:00:02.759 --> 0:00:03.240 How you doing? 0:00:04.280 --> 0:00:04.480 Ah? 0:00:05.200 --> 0:00:07.360 Pretty good? All right, I don't know. 0:00:08.160 --> 0:00:13.560 Yeah, yeah, it's a loaded question. I shouldn't ask you, right, 0:00:14.280 --> 0:00:19.479 Oh my god, so good, so good this past year. 0:00:19.680 --> 0:00:24.400 I don't know. I think bad before, but good yeah 0:00:24.440 --> 0:00:32.040 twenty sixteen on really yeah? Yeah? Oh shit, yeah. I 0:00:32.080 --> 0:00:34.879 need to stop asking people how are you? Give me 0:00:34.920 --> 0:00:38.040 an answer to how you're doing. Let's get it, let's 0:00:38.080 --> 0:00:38.840 get into it. 0:00:38.960 --> 0:00:39.479 The news. 0:00:39.960 --> 0:00:42.839 Yeah, the thing, because it's like you're either doing horrible 0:00:42.920 --> 0:00:45.880 like most people, or if you're doing well, no one 0:00:45.880 --> 0:00:46.640 wants to hear that. 0:00:46.720 --> 0:00:47.479 I don't want to hear that. 0:00:47.560 --> 0:00:47.800 Shit. 0:00:48.720 --> 0:00:50.800 How bad are you? That's what I should ask? How 0:00:50.920 --> 0:00:52.319 bad are things for you? 0:00:52.440 --> 0:00:53.840 That's the worst thing going on? 0:00:56.520 --> 0:01:02.080 What's the saddest shit? This happened recently? My hairline? Oh on, 0:01:02.160 --> 0:01:04.200 your hairline looks spray air. 0:01:04.319 --> 0:01:08.640 Nice to do the doopostical. 0:01:08.760 --> 0:01:13.480 Worst thing, Brian, you were trying to ask me something, 0:01:13.640 --> 0:01:16.360 and I apologize. I just okay, just about your hairline? 0:01:17.520 --> 0:01:18.039 How's it look? 0:01:18.160 --> 0:01:18.360 Jack? 0:01:19.640 --> 0:01:19.840 Jack? 0:01:19.880 --> 0:01:20.119 Sorry? 0:01:20.160 --> 0:01:26.440 Real quick? How's my hair look? Hello the Internet, and 0:01:26.600 --> 0:01:31.600 welcome to season four to sixteen, episode four of DIRNDAILYSI guys, 0:01:32.480 --> 0:01:36.040 Oh god are you okay? Sorry? Sorry? Real quick, wellness 0:01:36.120 --> 0:01:41.520 check on Morse sprain my ankle. Uh. It's a production 0:01:41.560 --> 0:01:43.360 of iHeart Radio as a podcast where you take a 0:01:43.360 --> 0:01:47.600 deep dive into America's share consciousness. And it's Friday, November 0:01:47.680 --> 0:01:51.880 twenty twenty five. It's Black Friday. The reason for the season. 0:01:52.360 --> 0:01:56.560 You know, we've moved Thanksgiving forward and backward just to 0:01:57.560 --> 0:02:00.920 you know, get people time to shop, the corporations time 0:02:00.960 --> 0:02:03.560 to make that dang line go up. 0:02:04.040 --> 0:02:07.240 I'm grateful to say eleven percent on flat screen TV. 0:02:07.360 --> 0:02:12.680 That's what I'm great. That's my name's Jack O'Brien aka 0:02:13.280 --> 0:02:19.160 zip Ties, zip ties, so zip ties sold close to me? 0:02:20.000 --> 0:02:24.440 That one courtesy a Smitty Werbin Jaeger mun Jensen in 0:02:24.520 --> 0:02:29.440 reference to the Google search that undid the perfect crime 0:02:29.720 --> 0:02:31.600 that we covered earlier in the week, when a woman 0:02:31.680 --> 0:02:36.280 from Asian City, New Jersey, had herself zip tied and 0:02:36.400 --> 0:02:41.520 hired a scarification expert carved Trump whore into her body 0:02:42.560 --> 0:02:45.919 in order to try to make herself the next conservative 0:02:46.000 --> 0:02:49.840 victim who gets one hundred thousand dollars to go collect 0:02:49.840 --> 0:02:57.600 an award for being brave. Unfortunately, her accomplice had just 0:02:57.720 --> 0:03:00.000 googled zip ties close. 0:02:59.720 --> 0:03:00.040 To me. 0:03:01.960 --> 0:03:04.919 And they were like oh boy, that's also you guys, 0:03:05.600 --> 0:03:09.680 this one was most recent Google. That's right. Yeah, I 0:03:09.720 --> 0:03:13.480 mean that they should just have have an alarm that 0:03:13.560 --> 0:03:18.600 goes off every time somebody searches that that's not good. Yeah. Yeah. 0:03:18.800 --> 0:03:21.280 Thrilled to be joined in our second seat by a 0:03:21.360 --> 0:03:26.280 very funny comedian, actor, writer. Improvisers podcast is rebrand got 0:03:26.280 --> 0:03:29.720 a new special coming up called a Timeless Masterpiece. He 0:03:29.919 --> 0:03:33.600 just knows grinded into this meeting because he is our 0:03:33.840 --> 0:03:39.240 skateboarding man on the street. It's more what's up, God, 0:03:39.320 --> 0:03:42.240 thanks for having me, dude, Hello, mort what's up? Thank you? 0:03:42.280 --> 0:03:45.000 Thank you for being here. On to be here the 0:03:45.040 --> 0:03:50.600 slowest news week of the year. Yeah yeah, not really risk, 0:03:50.720 --> 0:03:55.560 that's nothing happening. Yeah, So we're thrilled to have you 0:03:55.600 --> 0:03:58.720 here and more we're thrilled to be joined. You're in 0:03:58.800 --> 0:04:01.920 for a treat. One of the funniest stand up comics 0:04:01.960 --> 0:04:06.279 in the world, one of our favorite guests on this podcast, 0:04:06.320 --> 0:04:08.200 and it's been way too long, you know. Here from 0:04:08.240 --> 0:04:11.360 TV podcast. You can see your headlining at a theater 0:04:11.520 --> 0:04:14.320 near you go. Check the website. Some dates coming to 0:04:14.360 --> 0:04:21.320 the Pacific Northwest Ashland Sarcasm Fest in December. I dang sarcasm. Uh, 0:04:21.800 --> 0:04:29.800 that that'll be there. It is made the same exectveling. Yeah, please, 0:04:29.839 --> 0:04:35.520 welcome back to the show. It's Amy Miller. What's up? Amy? 0:04:36.680 --> 0:04:36.960 Guys? 0:04:37.120 --> 0:04:40.680 So good to have you, I know, great to have 0:04:40.800 --> 0:04:45.120 you back. How are you? How are how's everybody planning 0:04:45.160 --> 0:04:47.359 to spend their Black Friday? 0:04:47.920 --> 0:04:51.760 Oh I'm gonna like, I'm gonna lie I'm gonna lie down. 0:04:52.040 --> 0:04:56.080 Probably that that is the correct answer. 0:04:56.279 --> 0:04:58.279 Yeah, my couch. 0:04:59.200 --> 0:05:02.200 Yeah, I think think that's that's where everybody should be 0:05:02.320 --> 0:05:03.920 on this entire weekend. 0:05:04.560 --> 0:05:06.080 Maybe a little small amount of. 0:05:06.520 --> 0:05:09.880 Crying, gentle sobbing, Are you going to really go for it? 0:05:09.920 --> 0:05:10.279 Do you think? 0:05:12.000 --> 0:05:15.400 I think I'm going to have maybe a good big 0:05:15.520 --> 0:05:19.400 sob sash for a few minutes, But then you got 0:05:19.400 --> 0:05:21.560 to hydrate after. Don't forget to hydrate. 0:05:21.760 --> 0:05:24.320 That's true, like some gatorade for a. 0:05:24.279 --> 0:05:25.960 Good water coming out of your check. 0:05:26.080 --> 0:05:27.320 Yeh, never cried before. 0:05:27.480 --> 0:05:31.880 Let's try to relate to the humans on this. 0:05:33.400 --> 0:05:37.800 I got a bad headache. Yeah, it was rough. My 0:05:37.880 --> 0:05:41.960 face was making weird shapes. I do cry sometimes, but 0:05:42.080 --> 0:05:45.000 my face doesn't change shape. There's just tears rolling down 0:05:45.040 --> 0:05:47.640 my face and I don't know what's happening. 0:05:48.800 --> 0:05:49.640 From Ghosts. 0:05:49.720 --> 0:05:55.320 Yeah, exactly, in that I have a lesbian scene with 0:05:55.520 --> 0:05:56.279 Whoopi Goldberg. 0:05:57.400 --> 0:06:00.720 You wish I would leave. I would love to see 0:06:00.760 --> 0:06:03.040 you act in the dramatic film Jack. 0:06:05.240 --> 0:06:13.120 Yeah too. Yeah, there's a dramatic range. Oh yeah, for sure. Amy. 0:06:13.160 --> 0:06:14.560 We're thrilled to have you here. We're going to get 0:06:14.560 --> 0:06:16.320 to know you a little bit better in a moment. First, 0:06:16.360 --> 0:06:18.360 we're going to tell the listeners a couple of things 0:06:18.440 --> 0:06:21.880 we're talking about. In terms of the news, we'll just 0:06:21.920 --> 0:06:24.400 cover that it is the slowest news week of the year. 0:06:25.240 --> 0:06:28.719 So like I I can remember a story that broke 0:06:28.800 --> 0:06:31.520 in like two thousand and nine. That's how slow the 0:06:31.560 --> 0:06:34.160 news were. The news is. I'm like, oh, yeah, there 0:06:34.360 --> 0:06:36.520 was one story, so I want to talk about that. 0:06:36.560 --> 0:06:41.320 It was when Tiger Woods, like drunk drove into his garden. 0:06:41.640 --> 0:06:42.919 Oh yeah, that was good. 0:06:43.200 --> 0:06:45.919 That was good, and like everybody remembers. So it's like 0:06:45.960 --> 0:06:48.760 a double edged sword because like the news media is 0:06:48.760 --> 0:06:54.680 not around, nobody's working, but if you fuck up, everyone's 0:06:54.720 --> 0:06:58.560 going to see it because there's nothing, nothing else is happening. 0:06:58.640 --> 0:07:01.440 You would think more solebrities would just try to be 0:07:01.720 --> 0:07:04.920 the news story. Something fucked up and crazy. 0:07:05.080 --> 0:07:06.200 This is your chance. 0:07:07.520 --> 0:07:09.280 They said celebrities Jack. 0:07:11.280 --> 0:07:13.840 That we should we should game plan something for for 0:07:14.040 --> 0:07:17.560 all of us to do. It's gotta Yeah, well, we'll 0:07:17.600 --> 0:07:20.320 talk about the makings of the perfect celebrity news story 0:07:20.320 --> 0:07:21.679 in this Tiger Woods gandal. 0:07:21.800 --> 0:07:24.800 That's like fun It doesn't make people hate you and 0:07:24.840 --> 0:07:27.960 you're not hurting anybody give them on the coverage. 0:07:28.240 --> 0:07:30.600 I was gonna say, it's funny if you started publicly 0:07:30.680 --> 0:07:33.920 dating the January sixth shaman guy, but that really make 0:07:34.000 --> 0:07:34.600 people hate you? 0:07:35.800 --> 0:07:35.920 Up. 0:07:37.400 --> 0:07:38.560 Yeah, he seems cool and. 0:07:38.640 --> 0:07:44.160 We're not getting back together. Messed it up. 0:07:45.080 --> 0:07:47.680 And then, as if to illustrate how slow the news 0:07:47.760 --> 0:07:51.040 day is, we're gonna cover the fact that six Flag 0:07:51.520 --> 0:07:55.200 just hired a CEO who kind of looks like the 0:07:55.240 --> 0:07:58.440 six Flags guy, And uh, I want to talk about that. 0:07:59.520 --> 0:08:02.800 I want to talk about the pope introducing like having 0:08:02.800 --> 0:08:06.240 a video at the front of a EDM rave. And 0:08:06.280 --> 0:08:08.960 then I want to talk about Black Friday news stories 0:08:08.960 --> 0:08:13.320 in general, the trend. We've covered this before, but uh, 0:08:14.080 --> 0:08:16.960 it don't stop, and it don't quit. They continue to 0:08:17.000 --> 0:08:21.200 treat Black Friday as if it's a capitalism thunderdome. And 0:08:21.320 --> 0:08:25.600 we'll talk about the reality behind those stories, all of 0:08:25.640 --> 0:08:28.120 that plenty more. But first Amy, we do like to 0:08:28.200 --> 0:08:31.320 ask our guest, what is something from your search history 0:08:31.320 --> 0:08:32.600 that's revealing about who you are? 0:08:32.840 --> 0:08:39.640 Oh? Okay, well, I I was looking up a picture 0:08:39.800 --> 0:08:45.000 of that that played a fancy food from Missus Doubtfire. 0:08:44.880 --> 0:08:48.959 Like, oh yeah, from the restaurant at the end. 0:08:49.559 --> 0:08:52.120 Yeah, and he's like jumping heat. 0:08:52.280 --> 0:08:54.120 And he's jumping back and forth, yeah. 0:08:54.440 --> 0:08:57.920 From table to table, right, And it always just looked 0:08:57.960 --> 0:09:00.439 as a kid like like that was like a peak 0:09:00.480 --> 0:09:03.719 of like California cuisine, like this is what good delicious 0:09:03.720 --> 0:09:06.400 food looks like with those like tiny tiny carrot. 0:09:07.120 --> 0:09:07.840 Oh yeah. 0:09:08.240 --> 0:09:10.640 I was like, what if I just recreated this meal 0:09:10.760 --> 0:09:11.599 for friendsgiving? 0:09:13.240 --> 0:09:17.600 I'll have one Missus Doutfire please? Yeah, and then you 0:09:17.640 --> 0:09:19.920 get to stick your face into a cream pie at 0:09:19.960 --> 0:09:23.120 the end, you're still pretending to be a different person, 0:09:23.200 --> 0:09:24.320 but you're changing clothes. 0:09:25.240 --> 0:09:27.520 Nast your search history, Jack, Yeah. 0:09:27.400 --> 0:09:30.679 How do I cream pie myself? Is what I said? 0:09:30.720 --> 0:09:34.840 And people there was a lot of complicated and confusing diagrams. 0:09:35.320 --> 0:09:39.360 It's kind of hard to pull off, apparently, man, I yeah, 0:09:39.520 --> 0:09:42.520 just what rewatching Missus out Fire with my kids for 0:09:42.559 --> 0:09:46.000 the first time this past year. It is so good. 0:09:46.120 --> 0:09:50.560 Some of his riffs, as when he's just being funny 0:09:50.679 --> 0:09:54.480 Robin Williams, are like hard for kids to get, Like 0:09:54.559 --> 0:09:58.239 he's doing a lot of like old timey actor things, 0:09:58.280 --> 0:10:01.600 like old timey actor reference is. They still liked it, 0:10:01.880 --> 0:10:04.040 but to them it was just like he was doing 0:10:04.040 --> 0:10:06.560 imitations of just random voices. 0:10:07.160 --> 0:10:10.920 You know, he would be like doing jive talk or whatever, 0:10:11.000 --> 0:10:12.240 and you're like, hey, yeah. 0:10:12.240 --> 0:10:16.000 And then there's the subtle races. Ignore that one. We 0:10:16.000 --> 0:10:18.600 don't do that voice, we don't do that one, the 0:10:18.640 --> 0:10:23.400 seventies racism, which is a funny specific kind of yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, 0:10:24.320 --> 0:10:29.240 like that's Humphrey Bogart. Never mind, okay that ignore that one. 0:10:30.520 --> 0:10:33.760 But it's also like a lot of the genie riffs 0:10:34.320 --> 0:10:38.560 in Aladdin are like here's Johnny and like references to 0:10:38.640 --> 0:10:40.160 the Tonight Show that they have no. 0:10:40.080 --> 0:10:42.120 Frame of reference or the Shining. 0:10:42.400 --> 0:10:44.679 Yeah right, well they have seen the shining and they 0:10:44.679 --> 0:10:47.960 do love that. Yeah. My seven year old, in particular, 0:10:48.559 --> 0:10:49.120 I had. 0:10:48.960 --> 0:10:53.800 A seventh grade teacher that was an alcoholic. 0:10:54.320 --> 0:10:58.040 Uh huh, yeah, I'm familiar with that phrase. I know 0:10:58.080 --> 0:11:00.959 about those one that wasn't that was a ship. 0:11:02.920 --> 0:11:07.079 Anytime she like wasn't feeling well or whatever, like that 0:11:07.240 --> 0:11:07.840 was the go to. 0:11:08.240 --> 0:11:10.319 Like we would always be shining missus. 0:11:14.440 --> 0:11:18.640 Kids in it. The kid's a star, it's a kids movie. 0:11:19.080 --> 0:11:22.439 Yeah, she would just throw on missus doubtfire. But uh, 0:11:22.600 --> 0:11:24.760 you know, it was a lot. It was many, many 0:11:24.840 --> 0:11:25.680 times of the year. 0:11:26.280 --> 0:11:30.679 That's that's an interesting one. That's an interesting one because 0:11:30.800 --> 0:11:34.040 I'm trying to wrap my head around like we had 0:11:34.040 --> 0:11:36.360 a I went to a Catholic high school in Kentucky 0:11:36.840 --> 0:11:40.840 and we had a priest who not not like because 0:11:40.920 --> 0:11:43.480 he was hung over that day, but like as part 0:11:43.559 --> 0:11:46.920 of his curriculum at the outside of the year, it 0:11:46.960 --> 0:11:49.400 was like three solid days you were going to be 0:11:49.440 --> 0:11:54.200 watching Brave Heart for some reason, which everyone was like, fuck, yeah, man, 0:11:54.360 --> 0:11:57.560 that's that's fine. I'll take that. But I think the 0:11:57.600 --> 0:12:00.920 way he justified it was that it was like based 0:12:00.960 --> 0:12:04.280 on history, Uh, missus doubt fire. I'm trying to figure out, like, 0:12:05.920 --> 0:12:09.960 based on history to you about drag in a way 0:12:10.120 --> 0:12:12.640 that isn't going to scare people. We had a I 0:12:12.679 --> 0:12:15.000 had a public health teacher who was also the pe teacher, 0:12:15.000 --> 0:12:17.120 and one time he came in class and he wrote 0:12:17.200 --> 0:12:19.920 public health but he forgot the l in public. So 0:12:19.960 --> 0:12:22.640 it's a pupil and that was our super Bowl, Like 0:12:22.920 --> 0:12:24.920 I've never seen your children. 0:12:25.160 --> 0:12:26.440 You don't think he did it on purpose. 0:12:26.760 --> 0:12:30.280 That almost feels that almost feels like he that was 0:12:30.320 --> 0:12:32.360 his introduction to sex ed And then he was like, 0:12:32.400 --> 0:12:38.400 people think this phrase is weird. Once he saw your reaction, public, public, public, 0:12:39.280 --> 0:12:44.080 I gotta go. He just really wanted to talk about it. 0:12:44.920 --> 0:12:49.720 He asked questions for us about what is something amy 0:12:49.760 --> 0:12:50.840 you think is underrated? 0:12:52.559 --> 0:12:56.400 Not going home for Thanksgiving underrated? 0:12:56.520 --> 0:12:57.680 Not going just. 0:12:57.920 --> 0:13:02.640 Underrated, like ignoring the actual dates that things happen, Like 0:13:02.720 --> 0:13:05.200 I don't know why. We're just like I've never really 0:13:05.240 --> 0:13:07.240 got I didn't even really care about my own birthday 0:13:07.240 --> 0:13:09.960 on the day, I mean my birthday. Heills in New 0:13:10.040 --> 0:13:12.000 Year's Eve, so there's probably a reason for that. 0:13:12.559 --> 0:13:13.520 Yeah, oh my god. 0:13:13.880 --> 0:13:19.400 Can I just drive up next week when there's not traffic? Yeah, 0:13:19.440 --> 0:13:22.720 it just it's just insane. I'm opting out this year 0:13:23.280 --> 0:13:26.559 nice thankfully. Yeah, I feel good. I feel strong about it. 0:13:27.120 --> 0:13:28.640 I can't be guilted any longer. 0:13:29.200 --> 0:13:31.920 That is not an overblown story. The way that travel 0:13:32.040 --> 0:13:36.120 is just an absolute fucking nightmare around Thanksgiving yeah, it's 0:13:36.200 --> 0:13:40.120 just like in America tries to fit on one plane. Yeah. 0:13:40.200 --> 0:13:43.000 Yeah, my family lives in the Bay Area. And even 0:13:43.080 --> 0:13:45.400 driving it was like there was a year that I 0:13:45.440 --> 0:13:47.560 three years ago, I drove back and it was like 0:13:48.000 --> 0:13:53.640 literally twelve hours to get from like Oakland to LA. Yeah. 0:13:53.760 --> 0:13:56.800 If you're wondering why mort is here instead of Miles Gray, 0:13:56.840 --> 0:14:00.360 it is exactly to avoid that situation. Was the way 0:14:00.440 --> 0:14:01.880 up to the Bay Area and he was like, Oh, 0:14:01.920 --> 0:14:05.360 if I record this podcast, we're just going to drive 0:14:05.440 --> 0:14:08.360 up there, get there and leave right away because it 0:14:08.360 --> 0:14:11.280 will take us twenty four hours. But yeah, it's, uh, 0:14:11.440 --> 0:14:13.160 it's hell out there. I think that's a I think 0:14:13.160 --> 0:14:18.080 that's very valid. Why yourselves, Yeah, yourselves to coordinate with 0:14:18.120 --> 0:14:22.800 the people. Yeah, freedom, I think he said, for your 0:14:22.800 --> 0:14:27.400 mind and the rest will follow. The color blind. That 0:14:27.520 --> 0:14:32.480 was what he screamed at the end. What is uh, 0:14:32.520 --> 0:14:33.960 what's something you think is overrated? 0:14:34.200 --> 0:14:36.080 Okay, I didn't hear. I didn't see it in the 0:14:36.120 --> 0:14:38.040 stories we're going to cover, So I have to say 0:14:38.080 --> 0:14:41.040 Campbell's soup. Yeah, a big piece of news. 0:14:41.080 --> 0:14:44.640 Did you guys We covered it yesterday? Yeah, that one 0:14:44.920 --> 0:14:49.760 we covered it on every day two Damn much. Yeah, 0:14:50.560 --> 0:14:54.640 one of our nine episodes yesterday we did record three. 0:14:56.680 --> 0:14:59.120 I've always felt it to be overrated, and I am 0:14:59.200 --> 0:15:03.720 one of the fat poors. He mentioned, I grew up 0:15:03.720 --> 0:15:07.360 eating it, and it's like, no, it wasn't. There's not 0:15:07.440 --> 0:15:09.400 even a comfort to it in the way that like 0:15:09.480 --> 0:15:12.800 a pack of blue ramen is still comforting. And I 0:15:12.840 --> 0:15:15.680 still do you know what I mean, it's like always 0:15:15.760 --> 0:15:20.720 been disgusting. Like and also why am I cooking? Like 0:15:20.760 --> 0:15:22.840 the whole point, why do I have to add water 0:15:22.920 --> 0:15:26.680 to this? Like we already decided. If I'm gonna buy 0:15:26.680 --> 0:15:28.360 a can of soup, it's because I don't want to 0:15:28.400 --> 0:15:31.840 cook soup. Don't make me put an ingredient in it. 0:15:32.320 --> 0:15:34.480 One place he was completely on the money was when 0:15:34.520 --> 0:15:37.480 he described the chicken as seeming as though it were 0:15:37.480 --> 0:15:43.560 three D printed. 0:15:44.560 --> 0:15:48.880 He's very funny. I mean, he's gonna if if it's 0:15:48.920 --> 0:15:51.680 like not too late to add anyone to Trump's cabinet, 0:15:53.520 --> 0:15:55.160 he would be a shoe in. 0:15:56.920 --> 0:15:59.440 A Department of Defense and healthcare. He's like it's like 0:15:59.520 --> 0:16:05.640 nine per so he's he's he's he does see it. 0:16:05.680 --> 0:16:07.880 I mean he seems like could be a perfect fit 0:16:07.920 --> 0:16:09.360 in that I feel like a lot of the people 0:16:09.640 --> 0:16:13.880 like Rudy Giuliani became a perfect fit for his cabinet 0:16:13.960 --> 0:16:16.800 when he just was like what if I stayed drunk 0:16:16.920 --> 0:16:20.520 all day? And like this rant definitely feels like somebody 0:16:20.520 --> 0:16:25.000 who was just hammered, Like nobody has that much stamina 0:16:25.120 --> 0:16:28.440 to be like and another thing for an hour long 0:16:28.680 --> 0:16:32.040 zoom call where everyone else is like video off and 0:16:32.080 --> 0:16:34.560 he's still going. It's like the backstage at the comedy 0:16:34.600 --> 0:16:36.600 store when like people have been doing cocaine for too 0:16:36.680 --> 0:16:38.640 long or whatever. He's like, you want to go home, 0:16:38.640 --> 0:16:41.200 but it won't stop. He could have been cocaine actually, 0:16:41.200 --> 0:16:44.560 because he is he was in the c suite of Campbell's. 0:16:44.600 --> 0:16:47.520 Campbell's was like, uh he was like some tech guy 0:16:47.640 --> 0:16:52.000 and it's like no, he was a chief technology security whatever. 0:16:52.280 --> 0:16:54.800 Like he he's in this c suite. He's like one 0:16:54.800 --> 0:16:58.120 of your main dudes. And and a lot. 0:16:58.080 --> 0:17:02.240 Like Rudy Giuliani, he is red wine drunk, which is 0:17:02.240 --> 0:17:06.520 a special kind of It was like that drunk you 0:17:06.520 --> 0:17:10.080 know what a jug of not even good red wine, 0:17:10.200 --> 0:17:13.719 Like it's just a different kind of alcoholic. Like they 0:17:14.160 --> 0:17:16.560 they they're very emotional. 0:17:16.840 --> 0:17:22.360 Yeah, dewey eyed and slow kind of that's right. 0:17:22.840 --> 0:17:27.560 Yeah, and like rosy but you know, just yeah, dark teeth. 0:17:28.760 --> 0:17:33.280 The teeth they need another hug, stained teeth, needing a 0:17:33.359 --> 0:17:35.520 hug for a hug. 0:17:35.800 --> 0:17:37.960 Yeah, they're listening to a lot of opera. 0:17:38.640 --> 0:17:44.840 Yeah, pretentious, their pretentious alcoholics. Yeah, we did. We did 0:17:44.920 --> 0:17:49.200 take a look into not just that rant, but also 0:17:49.400 --> 0:17:54.200 just their history and there's there's a lot of ship that. Uh. Yeah. 0:17:54.240 --> 0:17:59.000 They were like dumping toxic waste into Lake Eerie. For 0:17:59.200 --> 0:18:02.000 a number of you, that sounds that's why if you 0:18:02.000 --> 0:18:04.000 swim in it, it tastes like it tastes like chicken noodle. 0:18:04.160 --> 0:18:08.240 That's right. They were like, fine, we did it nine 0:18:08.320 --> 0:18:11.439 hundred times over the course of like three years. So 0:18:11.480 --> 0:18:14.080 they were doing it three times a day, dumping toxic 0:18:14.119 --> 0:18:19.000 waste into Lake Erie, and it like contributed to a 0:18:19.000 --> 0:18:21.960 algae bloom that made the entire city of I think 0:18:21.960 --> 0:18:25.600 it was Toledo have to turn off their water for 0:18:25.720 --> 0:18:26.439 four days. 0:18:26.680 --> 0:18:27.879 How are they going to make the soup? 0:18:28.480 --> 0:18:30.879 Exactly? Thank you. 0:18:30.960 --> 0:18:33.560 Can I say something about those chicken noodle noodles too, 0:18:33.640 --> 0:18:36.240 because there's nothing like it. They don't exist anywhere else. 0:18:36.400 --> 0:18:39.320 Because they could just use a short, small noodle like 0:18:39.400 --> 0:18:43.680 a shell or macaroni or whatever. But instead they're chopping. 0:18:43.560 --> 0:18:46.399 Spaghetti, chopping chopped spaghetti. 0:18:46.920 --> 0:18:49.560 It's like little pieces of noodle chunks. 0:18:49.600 --> 0:18:54.240 But the least aldente pasta has ever been. Yeah, it 0:18:54.280 --> 0:18:55.560 tastes like it has the flu. 0:18:55.880 --> 0:18:58.960 Yes, it's like gladness. 0:18:59.720 --> 0:19:03.719 It is so fucked up. The substance of that is 0:19:03.760 --> 0:19:06.480 like the fact that that was the first pasta that 0:19:06.560 --> 0:19:08.359 I probably ever ate is. 0:19:08.720 --> 0:19:12.840 Yeah, that spaghettios for sure are delicious. If that guy 0:19:12.960 --> 0:19:17.280 goes off, I don't know what I was in charge of, mister. 0:19:17.440 --> 0:19:19.280 If mister Boyardy lose. 0:19:19.119 --> 0:19:21.040 Is it a jug of wine? 0:19:21.280 --> 0:19:24.440 That's right, doctor Boyard. I think I think he got 0:19:24.440 --> 0:19:32.680 his PhD in spaghettios with Pepper old friends. Yeah, it's 0:19:32.680 --> 0:19:35.159 a very good point about the ramen too, Like that 0:19:35.160 --> 0:19:39.760 that has totally supplanted any at home soup option. Like 0:19:39.800 --> 0:19:42.520 if you're gonna you have to add water to that 0:19:42.560 --> 0:19:45.080 one too, But like if if we're adding water, might 0:19:45.119 --> 0:19:47.160 as well make it fucking awesome. 0:19:47.560 --> 0:19:49.160 I mean, I am cooking that one. 0:19:49.280 --> 0:19:53.560 I'm adding proccoli, I'm atkins shit onions. 0:19:53.720 --> 0:19:56.879 Oh so much better than Campbell's to say. In the 0:19:56.880 --> 0:19:59.560 first fifteen years of my comedy career, like I owed 0:19:59.600 --> 0:20:00.600 all wrong the baby. 0:20:00.680 --> 0:20:02.080 Yeah, what's your color? 0:20:02.640 --> 0:20:05.000 Uh dude, well, I do the the I don't think 0:20:05.040 --> 0:20:07.240 we should call it oriental, but that's what I did. 0:20:07.880 --> 0:20:08.119 I do. 0:20:08.400 --> 0:20:10.760 That's what it's called. Yeah, that's that's what it was. 0:20:11.280 --> 0:20:12.600 Yeah, the blue one. 0:20:12.720 --> 0:20:14.919 I'm chicken just because that's what we had in my 0:20:15.000 --> 0:20:18.920 dorm when I was like in high school, and yeah 0:20:19.119 --> 0:20:22.440 it was I've never given up on the chicken. 0:20:24.040 --> 0:20:25.000 Is the saltiest. 0:20:25.400 --> 0:20:26.000 Yeah. 0:20:26.040 --> 0:20:28.399 And when we eat one of those freaks in your life, 0:20:28.400 --> 0:20:30.960 that's like I only use half the packet, you know, 0:20:31.040 --> 0:20:32.440 Like I don't want to know you. 0:20:32.880 --> 0:20:35.680 Yeah, just wanting to get out of here. Yeah, I'm 0:20:35.720 --> 0:20:39.920 too busy exercising. You're like relaxed. I like how you 0:20:39.960 --> 0:20:41.800 define it by color. I'm going to start doing that. 0:20:42.040 --> 0:20:45.200 Yeah, that's kind of love to say oriental like you. 0:20:45.560 --> 0:20:51.280 Yeah, I'm on the edge of my scene. I have 0:20:51.280 --> 0:20:54.399 a gong that I hit like Jackie can't enters Rush 0:20:54.400 --> 0:20:55.720 Hour of Seeds. 0:20:55.880 --> 0:20:58.320 Does anybody eat the beef one? I don't. I think 0:20:58.320 --> 0:21:03.280 beef is like like mag I mean, I just I've 0:21:03.320 --> 0:21:05.840 never met anyone that defaulted. 0:21:05.480 --> 0:21:08.119 The prefers read. 0:21:07.800 --> 0:21:10.640 Yeah, anything that anything any they think that's be flavored 0:21:10.680 --> 0:21:13.760 makes me want to retire, like that's yeah, yeah, that's 0:21:13.760 --> 0:21:14.200 so good. 0:21:14.440 --> 0:21:17.200 Yeah being alive. I don't want to be around anymore. 0:21:18.200 --> 0:21:20.399 All Right, let's take a quick break and we'll be 0:21:20.520 --> 0:21:23.560 right back to talk about the slowest news day of 0:21:23.680 --> 0:21:38.600 the year. Into her back and guys, the pressure is off. 0:21:39.000 --> 0:21:42.320 It's slowest news time of the year. Everyone who makes news, 0:21:43.000 --> 0:21:48.280 both the journalists and the famous people, usually take a 0:21:48.320 --> 0:21:52.760 break from doing anything interesting or over the long weekend, 0:21:53.080 --> 0:21:56.040 and we get stories they wrote last week that they 0:21:56.119 --> 0:21:58.320 like try to pass off as breaking news. I just 0:21:58.359 --> 0:22:00.960 got a breaking news alert on my phone from Smithsonian 0:22:01.040 --> 0:22:05.200 magazine that scientists just discovered a second lion roar. 0:22:07.600 --> 0:22:09.719 I know, can you demonstrate it? 0:22:09.800 --> 0:22:13.359 Jet, It's just like, that's what it sounds like. I 0:22:13.400 --> 0:22:15.280 was like, well, there might have been a reason we 0:22:15.280 --> 0:22:19.800 weren't we didn't go with that one on the speaking spell, 0:22:19.880 --> 0:22:22.200 but you know, we're in the doldrums of the news cycle. 0:22:22.280 --> 0:22:25.720 Let's luxuriate. And then I did just want to really 0:22:25.800 --> 0:22:29.320 briefly talk about the one big breaking news story from 0:22:29.400 --> 0:22:33.239 this time of year, which was totally unplanned. It was 0:22:33.280 --> 0:22:35.840 such a weird story. So this is for anybody who's 0:22:35.840 --> 0:22:39.359 trying to go viral this long weekend. I think it 0:22:39.480 --> 0:22:43.560 had some key elements because the very first version of 0:22:43.600 --> 0:22:46.480 the story we got didn't make any fucking sense. Do 0:22:46.560 --> 0:22:49.800