1 00:00:02,759 --> 00:00:06,800 Speaker 1: Hey, guys, Welcome to Tommy Talk. Today's topic is the 2 00:00:06,960 --> 00:00:10,160 Speaker 1: pressure to drink and how to handle it. So we 3 00:00:10,200 --> 00:00:12,760 Speaker 1: are diving into the world of alcohol now. First and foremost, 4 00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:15,800 Speaker 1: I am not judging anybody's drinking habits. Whether you drink 5 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:19,040 Speaker 1: a little, a lot, or somewhere in between, that is 6 00:00:19,160 --> 00:00:21,479 Speaker 1: up to you, rock on to each of their own. 7 00:00:22,200 --> 00:00:24,680 Speaker 1: I am more interested in this Tommy Talk because I 8 00:00:24,720 --> 00:00:29,240 Speaker 1: feel like we are entering a new era and drinking 9 00:00:29,360 --> 00:00:33,400 Speaker 1: used to be so glorified and so highly kind of 10 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:37,159 Speaker 1: talked about and praised as the most social thing you 11 00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:39,640 Speaker 1: can do with friends and loved ones. And there's a shift. 12 00:00:39,720 --> 00:00:42,159 Speaker 1: There's definitely a shift, but that shift is kind of 13 00:00:42,360 --> 00:00:44,800 Speaker 1: partially happening, right. I feel like there's a percentage of 14 00:00:44,840 --> 00:00:47,920 Speaker 1: the population shifting, and there's a percentage of the population 15 00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:51,159 Speaker 1: that is not shifting. And what I find is I 16 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:55,959 Speaker 1: am often in situations where drinking is expected or glorified, 17 00:00:56,440 --> 00:00:59,800 Speaker 1: or you're made to feel like you're strange for not drinking. 18 00:01:00,520 --> 00:01:03,320 Speaker 1: And I think it's a really interesting topic because whether 19 00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:05,200 Speaker 1: or not you drink a little or a lot, as 20 00:01:05,240 --> 00:01:07,840 Speaker 1: I said, sometimes you just don't want to drink, but 21 00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:11,160 Speaker 1: there's always pressure put on us by people, by society, 22 00:01:11,720 --> 00:01:14,520 Speaker 1: and there's a way I think that we can handle 23 00:01:14,520 --> 00:01:17,400 Speaker 1: that so that we don't feel so awkward. So, first 24 00:01:17,440 --> 00:01:19,840 Speaker 1: of all, there's a study that came out that's very 25 00:01:19,959 --> 00:01:23,520 Speaker 1: very interesting from the National Institute on Drug Abuse which 26 00:01:23,560 --> 00:01:27,920 Speaker 1: shows that lifetime drinking, past month drinking, and past year 27 00:01:28,040 --> 00:01:32,120 Speaker 1: drinking among young people began to decline around the year 28 00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:35,080 Speaker 1: two thousand. So that means that such you know, declients 29 00:01:35,120 --> 00:01:39,640 Speaker 1: have especially impacted Generation z akagen Z what's up gen Z, 30 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:42,440 Speaker 1: which is defined as anyone born from ninety seven to 31 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:46,280 Speaker 1: twenty twelve, and even millennials born from eighty one to 32 00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:52,200 Speaker 1: nineteen ninety six. So today's generations, younger generations, I should say, 33 00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:55,400 Speaker 1: are just drinking less and less and less. So why 34 00:01:55,520 --> 00:01:59,440 Speaker 1: is alcohol still being thrown in our faces? I'm going 35 00:01:59,480 --> 00:02:01,840 Speaker 1: to give you a couple examples in my life where 36 00:02:01,960 --> 00:02:06,240 Speaker 1: it's just always around and I am not a huge 37 00:02:06,320 --> 00:02:10,000 Speaker 1: drinker anymore, don't get me wrong. In my twenties, Tommy 38 00:02:10,200 --> 00:02:13,240 Speaker 1: in his twenties had some fun that was like the 39 00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:17,280 Speaker 1: clubbing heyday where for all my New Yorkers I would 40 00:02:17,320 --> 00:02:21,320 Speaker 1: go to Marquis and Stereo and Bungalow eight and home 41 00:02:21,440 --> 00:02:25,440 Speaker 1: in bed and would party and drink and have fun. 42 00:02:25,600 --> 00:02:27,560 Speaker 1: And I'm not going to deny I had a great 43 00:02:27,639 --> 00:02:31,840 Speaker 1: time in my twenties and I definitely got out my partying. 44 00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:36,000 Speaker 1: But now, you know, I'm just not as interested. If 45 00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:39,800 Speaker 1: I'm drinking now, it's never at home, Like, I just 46 00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:43,000 Speaker 1: don't ever open up a drink at home. I really 47 00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:46,320 Speaker 1: reserve it for celebratory moments. I don't even really drink 48 00:02:46,320 --> 00:02:48,240 Speaker 1: if I go to dinner with friends on a Tuesday 49 00:02:48,320 --> 00:02:51,440 Speaker 1: or Wednesday, Like for me to have a drink, I'm 50 00:02:51,560 --> 00:02:54,480 Speaker 1: celebrating something. I maybe at a wedding, or I haven't 51 00:02:54,480 --> 00:02:56,440 Speaker 1: seen friends in a long time and we're getting together, 52 00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:58,800 Speaker 1: so we're gonna have a nice, you know, dinner and drink. 53 00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:01,760 Speaker 1: It's got to have that kind of celibratory feeling. Otherwise 54 00:03:01,800 --> 00:03:05,200 Speaker 1: I'm not really interested. And again that's just me. I'm 55 00:03:05,280 --> 00:03:07,960 Speaker 1: not judging anybody. It's just where I am in my life. 56 00:03:07,960 --> 00:03:10,480 Speaker 1: I drink a lot in my younger days to make 57 00:03:10,560 --> 00:03:13,920 Speaker 1: up for it, trust me, So that's just where I 58 00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:17,079 Speaker 1: am right now. I do love a good glass of wine. 59 00:03:17,120 --> 00:03:19,359 Speaker 1: I'm an Italian boy. I love a little champagne or 60 00:03:19,360 --> 00:03:22,600 Speaker 1: maybe tequila. But again I reserve it for when there 61 00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:25,600 Speaker 1: are more special moments, maybe on vacation for example. 62 00:03:26,400 --> 00:03:28,520 Speaker 2: So with all that being said. 63 00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:31,639 Speaker 1: I feel like I am constantly in a world where 64 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:34,840 Speaker 1: alcohol is being shoved down my throat. I work in 65 00:03:34,880 --> 00:03:38,000 Speaker 1: the entertainment business, and perhaps this is similar to fields 66 00:03:38,040 --> 00:03:41,560 Speaker 1: that you work in. But there's always events and usually 67 00:03:41,600 --> 00:03:44,960 Speaker 1: there's always an alcohol bar, right, But they don't ever 68 00:03:44,960 --> 00:03:46,680 Speaker 1: have options if you don't want to drink, except for 69 00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:50,280 Speaker 1: club soda really or water. So it's always pushing the alcohol, 70 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:53,200 Speaker 1: pushing the alcohol at every event you go to. I 71 00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:56,440 Speaker 1: travel a lot for work, and sometimes the kind people 72 00:03:56,480 --> 00:03:59,040 Speaker 1: at the hotel i'm staying at will send a little 73 00:03:59,040 --> 00:04:01,520 Speaker 1: welcome package to the room, and it's usually a bottle 74 00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:04,480 Speaker 1: of champagne or wine, which is very very nice. But 75 00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:06,280 Speaker 1: if I'm there for work and it's a quick trip 76 00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:09,200 Speaker 1: and I'm in that mentality of work mode, I'm definitely 77 00:04:09,240 --> 00:04:11,080 Speaker 1: not going to be drinking, so I feel bad, but 78 00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:14,400 Speaker 1: I usually leave the bottle exactly where it was on 79 00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:18,480 Speaker 1: the table. It's interesting that that's the go to gift 80 00:04:18,560 --> 00:04:21,320 Speaker 1: instead of being like, maybe we should send a nice 81 00:04:21,560 --> 00:04:25,320 Speaker 1: tea package or chocolate package or snacks whatever. 82 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:26,920 Speaker 2: Right, It's always alcohol. 83 00:04:27,560 --> 00:04:30,040 Speaker 1: And the most recent thing that got me thinking about 84 00:04:30,040 --> 00:04:32,640 Speaker 1: this is Geo and I were in Saint Bart's over 85 00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:36,560 Speaker 1: the summer, and the sweet sweet staff of this hotel, 86 00:04:36,640 --> 00:04:39,000 Speaker 1: La Buffalo lea Mei, which is a gorgeous place if 87 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:41,880 Speaker 1: you need to check something out and you're visiting there, 88 00:04:42,640 --> 00:04:45,839 Speaker 1: they found an article online from earlier this year that 89 00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:49,000 Speaker 1: was celebrating ten years of same sex marriage. It was 90 00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:51,240 Speaker 1: in People magazine and they featured G and I as 91 00:04:51,279 --> 00:04:54,080 Speaker 1: one of the couples. So they wanted to celebrate that, 92 00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:56,400 Speaker 1: and they made our room really beautiful and special. And 93 00:04:56,440 --> 00:04:59,039 Speaker 1: they know our ten year wedding anniversaries coming up in April, 94 00:04:59,120 --> 00:05:03,240 Speaker 1: so they just treated us so beautifully. But with that, 95 00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:06,200 Speaker 1: they wanted to keep the celebrations going, so we would 96 00:05:06,200 --> 00:05:08,600 Speaker 1: go to breakfast at seven am. Yes we're early birds 97 00:05:08,640 --> 00:05:10,479 Speaker 1: and go to breakfast at seven am even on vacation, 98 00:05:10,600 --> 00:05:14,960 Speaker 1: don't judge us. And the kind kind weight stuff brought 99 00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:19,520 Speaker 1: over champagne, and I'm thinking, oh my god, it's seven am, 100 00:05:19,839 --> 00:05:22,400 Speaker 1: and again have I never have I ever had a 101 00:05:22,440 --> 00:05:24,359 Speaker 1: champaign at seven am? I'm sure I did at twenty 102 00:05:24,360 --> 00:05:26,919 Speaker 1: two or twenty three, like come on, but you know, 103 00:05:28,080 --> 00:05:31,520 Speaker 1: as two adult men, I'm thinking, what makes you think 104 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:33,080 Speaker 1: I want champagne at seven am? 105 00:05:33,120 --> 00:05:33,560 Speaker 2: I don't. 106 00:05:33,720 --> 00:05:36,000 Speaker 1: I need my tea, I need some caffeine. Your boys 107 00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:38,880 Speaker 1: gotta wake the fuck up. So now we have these 108 00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:42,359 Speaker 1: really big glasses of champagne on our table at seven am. 109 00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:45,000 Speaker 1: The entire weight stuff is beaming with pride. They're so excited, 110 00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:48,080 Speaker 1: they're so happy that they brought this over. And we're 111 00:05:48,120 --> 00:05:50,120 Speaker 1: looking at each other like we don't want to drink, 112 00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:52,920 Speaker 1: like what do we do? And furthermore, why are we 113 00:05:52,960 --> 00:05:53,680 Speaker 1: in this position? 114 00:05:53,839 --> 00:05:54,720 Speaker 2: Come on right? 115 00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:58,159 Speaker 1: So we took a little sip, so they saw us 116 00:05:58,200 --> 00:06:00,600 Speaker 1: take a tiny sip, and then I said, let's bring 117 00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:02,360 Speaker 1: it back to our hotel room. Will act like we're 118 00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:03,920 Speaker 1: going to go sit, you know, in our in our 119 00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:07,000 Speaker 1: little terrace area and enjoy some champagne at seven am. 120 00:06:07,520 --> 00:06:08,440 Speaker 2: So we did. 121 00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:09,640 Speaker 1: We told them, you know, we're going to take this 122 00:06:09,680 --> 00:06:11,600 Speaker 1: back to the room, and we went back to the 123 00:06:11,680 --> 00:06:13,840 Speaker 1: room and we dumped it down the drain. We just 124 00:06:13,920 --> 00:06:15,719 Speaker 1: didn't want to be rude because it was very sweet 125 00:06:15,720 --> 00:06:19,080 Speaker 1: and thoughtful and they were so excited, but we didn't 126 00:06:19,240 --> 00:06:23,359 Speaker 1: want to drink it. So it's just funny how alcohol 127 00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:25,240 Speaker 1: is everyone when you sit down at a restaurant. Now, 128 00:06:25,240 --> 00:06:26,719 Speaker 1: I feel like the first thing they say is like, 129 00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:28,200 Speaker 1: do you want to drink? Here's a wy men, here's 130 00:06:28,200 --> 00:06:29,400 Speaker 1: a cock, silen, you have a drink? Do you want 131 00:06:29,440 --> 00:06:30,400 Speaker 1: to drink? Can I get you a drink? Do you 132 00:06:30,440 --> 00:06:32,359 Speaker 1: want anything else besides water? Like they almost make it 133 00:06:32,360 --> 00:06:34,360 Speaker 1: awkward if you don't want to drink it now at 134 00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:37,680 Speaker 1: so many restaurants, it's always being thrown in our faces. 135 00:06:38,279 --> 00:06:43,000 Speaker 1: So my feeling is, if you don't want to drink 136 00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:48,520 Speaker 1: and you feel pressured to drink, just be honest, Just 137 00:06:48,640 --> 00:06:51,720 Speaker 1: say to people like no, thank you, and you don't 138 00:06:51,720 --> 00:06:53,480 Speaker 1: have to give an excuse. I did another time we 139 00:06:53,600 --> 00:06:56,640 Speaker 1: talk called the Power of No, and a big message 140 00:06:56,640 --> 00:06:59,679 Speaker 1: in that was don't give an excuse. It's no one's business. 141 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:01,479 Speaker 1: You don't have to give an excuse. You don't have 142 00:07:01,560 --> 00:07:03,320 Speaker 1: to feel like, oh, I'm gonna hurt their feelings or 143 00:07:03,320 --> 00:07:05,520 Speaker 1: make They're gonna think I'm weird or lame or stupid 144 00:07:05,640 --> 00:07:08,880 Speaker 1: or boring. So I have to say something no, no, no, no, no, 145 00:07:08,880 --> 00:07:11,160 Speaker 1: no no no. You don't have to say any of that. 146 00:07:11,880 --> 00:07:16,200 Speaker 1: Just simply say I'm good, thank you, my god. It 147 00:07:16,280 --> 00:07:19,520 Speaker 1: was that easy. It was that easy. And sometimes you know, 148 00:07:20,160 --> 00:07:22,480 Speaker 1: you're best friends in the world. They're not gonna care. 149 00:07:22,560 --> 00:07:24,200 Speaker 1: They're not gonna put pressure on you if you don't 150 00:07:24,200 --> 00:07:26,560 Speaker 1: want to drink, like that's that's life. They don't give 151 00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:29,280 Speaker 1: a shit. But some friend groups do care, and I 152 00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:31,240 Speaker 1: find those are the friends you're not the closest too. 153 00:07:31,400 --> 00:07:33,160 Speaker 1: And I've had friend groups, you know, I've had a 154 00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:35,040 Speaker 1: bunch of guys coming up in the city in my 155 00:07:35,080 --> 00:07:38,560 Speaker 1: twenties and thirties, who would make it such a thing 156 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,720 Speaker 1: if I didn't want to have a drink, you know, 157 00:07:40,920 --> 00:07:44,800 Speaker 1: called being called lame, you're so boring, you don't know 158 00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:47,200 Speaker 1: how to have fun. Well, I'm not gonna drink if 159 00:07:47,240 --> 00:07:49,080 Speaker 1: you're not going to drink. And it's like, well, whoa, 160 00:07:49,400 --> 00:07:51,360 Speaker 1: what does me not drinking have to do with you 161 00:07:51,440 --> 00:07:52,200 Speaker 1: not wanting to drink? 162 00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:52,840 Speaker 2: Are you kidding me? 163 00:07:52,880 --> 00:07:55,560 Speaker 1: You're gonna try to peer pressure me to drink by saying, well, 164 00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:56,920 Speaker 1: I'm not going to have a drink now, and my 165 00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:58,920 Speaker 1: night he's ruined because you're not drinking. 166 00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:01,640 Speaker 2: No. Guess what it did work for me years and 167 00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:03,280 Speaker 2: years and years ago. And then I would feel bad 168 00:08:03,320 --> 00:08:03,800 Speaker 2: and be like. 169 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:06,080 Speaker 1: Oh man, all right, and it's just one whatever and 170 00:08:06,080 --> 00:08:07,840 Speaker 1: then I would wake up feeling like shit, and I 171 00:08:07,880 --> 00:08:09,720 Speaker 1: was so pissed I didn't have it. That's the other 172 00:08:09,800 --> 00:08:10,600 Speaker 1: thing with drinking. Now. 173 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:11,880 Speaker 2: I'm thirty nine, and like. 174 00:08:12,080 --> 00:08:15,360 Speaker 1: Sometimes even two glasses of something it makes me not sleep. 175 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:18,080 Speaker 1: I'm on sweating all night. I wake up a little off, 176 00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:20,440 Speaker 1: and I don't like the feeling. If I'm drinking, it's 177 00:08:20,480 --> 00:08:23,880 Speaker 1: got to be good alcohol and celibratory, and usually I'm 178 00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:26,160 Speaker 1: good with like one, and if I'm really wild, maybe 179 00:08:26,160 --> 00:08:29,720 Speaker 1: I have two. But anyway, you don't owe anybody an 180 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:32,760 Speaker 1: explanation as to why you do or don't want to 181 00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:37,240 Speaker 1: drink periods, So your closest friends should understand. I find 182 00:08:37,280 --> 00:08:39,640 Speaker 1: the ones that aren't as close to the ones that 183 00:08:39,679 --> 00:08:41,880 Speaker 1: maybe give you a hard time about not drinking, And 184 00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:43,880 Speaker 1: guess what, I'm not really friends with those people anymore, 185 00:08:43,880 --> 00:08:46,440 Speaker 1: because over years and over time, I've realized we don't 186 00:08:46,480 --> 00:08:49,240 Speaker 1: have a ton in common anyway. And if all our 187 00:08:50,040 --> 00:08:54,959 Speaker 1: you know, hangouts are centered around alcohol and immense, immense 188 00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:58,440 Speaker 1: amounts of alcohol, well that's not really a friendship that 189 00:08:58,480 --> 00:09:00,640 Speaker 1: has substance. Like, you know, nothing going on in my life. 190 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:03,640 Speaker 1: You don't ask me questions about anything, like what is 191 00:09:03,679 --> 00:09:05,200 Speaker 1: this I don't want to just get together with you 192 00:09:05,240 --> 00:09:08,480 Speaker 1: and drink like that's not fun. So anyway, the ones 193 00:09:08,520 --> 00:09:11,000 Speaker 1: that you're closest to, they won't care. They won't care. 194 00:09:11,440 --> 00:09:14,240 Speaker 1: And if you're in a work situation and you feel 195 00:09:14,280 --> 00:09:17,640 Speaker 1: pressure or there's you know, a big boss you're trying 196 00:09:17,679 --> 00:09:20,840 Speaker 1: to impress guys, guess what if you fill up a 197 00:09:20,840 --> 00:09:24,680 Speaker 1: glass with club soda and ice and even a splash 198 00:09:24,679 --> 00:09:27,439 Speaker 1: of cran to make it look like a mixed cocktail 199 00:09:27,559 --> 00:09:29,760 Speaker 1: and squeeze in some limes, like you gotta throw in 200 00:09:29,800 --> 00:09:31,920 Speaker 1: some limes, that really does the trick. Nobody's gonna know 201 00:09:31,920 --> 00:09:34,240 Speaker 1: you're not drinking. Just fake it and don't say anything. 202 00:09:34,559 --> 00:09:37,400 Speaker 1: Don't say anything, like if you feel uncomfortable having to 203 00:09:37,440 --> 00:09:40,000 Speaker 1: be like, oh, I'm not drinking to somebody that's you know, 204 00:09:40,040 --> 00:09:42,640 Speaker 1: a colleague or a boss or whatever, don't say it. 205 00:09:42,679 --> 00:09:45,000 Speaker 1: They're not gonna sniff your drink. They're not gonna take 206 00:09:45,040 --> 00:09:47,440 Speaker 1: a drink from your drink. Just be like, you know, 207 00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:50,200 Speaker 1: I got my drink, and if they acknowledge it, that's 208 00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:51,760 Speaker 1: what you say. And if they don't, great, But at 209 00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:54,800 Speaker 1: least you feel like you're you know, faking it. In 210 00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:57,000 Speaker 1: a situation where maybe you're not as comfortable saying you 211 00:09:57,000 --> 00:10:00,960 Speaker 1: don't want to drink and that it's just that, Like 212 00:10:01,040 --> 00:10:03,439 Speaker 1: I just I firmly believe I'm in this era now 213 00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:07,040 Speaker 1: of we got to stop explaining ourselves away. Do what 214 00:10:07,080 --> 00:10:09,720 Speaker 1: you want to do. It is your body, man Like, 215 00:10:09,760 --> 00:10:11,160 Speaker 1: if you don't want it, you don't want it. If 216 00:10:11,160 --> 00:10:13,800 Speaker 1: someone's gonna look at you crazy for it, well fuck them. Like, 217 00:10:14,760 --> 00:10:19,480 Speaker 1: I'm just so over this way that so many of 218 00:10:19,559 --> 00:10:22,240 Speaker 1: us are made to feel nowadays, where it's like we 219 00:10:22,320 --> 00:10:25,200 Speaker 1: have to make up a lie or an excuse or something. No, 220 00:10:25,520 --> 00:10:27,160 Speaker 1: it's your life. If you don't want to drink, you 221 00:10:27,200 --> 00:10:29,760 Speaker 1: don't want to drink, period, full stop. And I do 222 00:10:29,840 --> 00:10:32,760 Speaker 1: admit it takes a little bit of a of an 223 00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:36,720 Speaker 1: adjustment to get into that mentality, because again, you're so 224 00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:40,160 Speaker 1: conditioned to feel pressured or baally or like the other 225 00:10:40,360 --> 00:10:43,000 Speaker 1: or lame or stupid or not cool if you don't 226 00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:45,840 Speaker 1: want to have a drink that it takes a minute 227 00:10:45,880 --> 00:10:49,640 Speaker 1: to feel comfortable and confident saying I'm good, I'm totally good, 228 00:10:49,880 --> 00:10:50,800 Speaker 1: I'm totally good. 229 00:10:51,120 --> 00:10:52,360 Speaker 2: And then when you want one. 230 00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:54,560 Speaker 1: Great, you want one, but it's on your terms. It 231 00:10:54,640 --> 00:10:57,640 Speaker 1: is on your terms. You decide when you want to 232 00:10:57,640 --> 00:10:59,680 Speaker 1: have a drink no one else, and if they try 233 00:10:59,679 --> 00:11:02,480 Speaker 1: to just for you, I don't know, I maybe consider 234 00:11:02,760 --> 00:11:05,760 Speaker 1: what that friendship really really is. And I often find 235 00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:09,240 Speaker 1: people that like to excessively drink, which you know, rock on. 236 00:11:09,320 --> 00:11:12,760 Speaker 1: If that brings you pleasure, that's your choice in your life. 237 00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:15,079 Speaker 1: They sometimes don't want to do it alone. But that's 238 00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:18,600 Speaker 1: not your responsibility. That's not your responsibility. My bottom line 239 00:11:18,640 --> 00:11:20,880 Speaker 1: is you need to make a choice based on what 240 00:11:20,920 --> 00:11:23,240 Speaker 1: brings you happiness, and if it's not something you want 241 00:11:23,280 --> 00:11:26,360 Speaker 1: to do, just don't do it. Just don't do it. 242 00:11:26,600 --> 00:11:29,000 Speaker 1: But the good news is, as I told you, from 243 00:11:29,080 --> 00:11:31,920 Speaker 1: this little study that I read you earlier, I feel 244 00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:35,280 Speaker 1: so so a professor ish professor. 245 00:11:35,440 --> 00:11:37,319 Speaker 2: I don't even know what I'm saying at this point, but. 246 00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:40,320 Speaker 1: I feel like based off that study, more and more 247 00:11:40,360 --> 00:11:44,360 Speaker 1: people are not drinking and feeling more comfortable with not 248 00:11:44,480 --> 00:11:47,760 Speaker 1: doing it. So I think that's really cool and it 249 00:11:47,760 --> 00:11:49,880 Speaker 1: gives hope for the future that you do what you 250 00:11:49,920 --> 00:11:52,880 Speaker 1: want to do. Mocktail bars are popping up. Lots of 251 00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:55,840 Speaker 1: other drink options are becoming available in restaurant menus with 252 00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:58,120 Speaker 1: the mocktail section. A fair warning, be careful because a 253 00:11:58,160 --> 00:12:01,640 Speaker 1: lot of that is sugar, So it's interesting the shift. 254 00:12:01,640 --> 00:12:04,360 Speaker 1: There is definitely a shift that we are seeing and 255 00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:08,120 Speaker 1: we are feeling. And my bottom line with this Tommy 256 00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:10,079 Speaker 1: Talk is it's up to you whether you want a 257 00:12:10,160 --> 00:12:12,600 Speaker 1: drink or not. It's not up to colleagues, it's not 258 00:12:12,720 --> 00:12:14,920 Speaker 1: up to friends, it's not even up to your bestie. 259 00:12:15,320 --> 00:12:17,480 Speaker 1: Like you don't want to do something, don't do it. 260 00:12:17,480 --> 00:12:20,040 Speaker 1: It's that simple. Don't do it. You have someone that's 261 00:12:20,040 --> 00:12:21,920 Speaker 1: coming over for dinner and they want a glass of wine, 262 00:12:21,960 --> 00:12:24,240 Speaker 1: open that bottle of wine for them. You don't want it. 263 00:12:24,400 --> 00:12:27,600 Speaker 1: Have some tea, have a sparkling water, have whatever you want. 264 00:12:27,880 --> 00:12:29,920 Speaker 1: If you want to have a drink, have a drink. 265 00:12:29,960 --> 00:12:31,720 Speaker 1: If you don't want to have a drink, don't have 266 00:12:31,760 --> 00:12:35,040 Speaker 1: a drink. I am done with people feeling pressure and 267 00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:38,120 Speaker 1: being made to feel badly for not wanting one. So 268 00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:41,600 Speaker 1: bottom's up my friends, whether you are drinking or whether 269 00:12:41,640 --> 00:12:42,160 Speaker 1: you are not. 270 00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:44,680 Speaker 2: Have fun, enjoy your. 271 00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:47,680 Speaker 1: Choices, and don't let anyone tell you how to run 272 00:12:47,720 --> 00:12:53,199 Speaker 1: your damn life. I've never said this before. Is hosted 273 00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:57,800 Speaker 1: by me Tommy Didario. This podcast is executive produced by 274 00:12:57,880 --> 00:13:01,839 Speaker 1: Andrew Puglisi at iHeartRadio and by Me Tommy, with editing 275 00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:05,680 Speaker 1: by Joshua Colaudney. I've Never Said this Before is part 276 00:13:05,679 --> 00:13:10,280 Speaker 1: of the Elvis Duran podcast Network on iHeart Podcasts. For more, rate, 277 00:13:10,440 --> 00:13:13,240 Speaker 1: review and subscribe to our show and if you liked 278 00:13:13,280 --> 00:13:18,520 Speaker 1: this episode, tell your friends. Until next time, I'm Tommy Diderio.