1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:02,759 Jessica Vosk: Welcome back to She Pivots. I'm Jessica Vosk. 2 00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:16,520 Emily Tisch Sussman: Welcome back to She Pivots, the podcast where we talk 3 00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:19,160 Emily Tisch Sussman: with women who dare to pivot out of one career 4 00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:23,800 Emily Tisch Sussman: and into something new and explore how their personal lives 5 00:00:23,880 --> 00:00:31,720 Emily Tisch Sussman: impacts these decisions. I'm your host Emily Tish Sussman and 6 00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:35,239 Emily Tisch Sussman: honor the Tony Awards this year. I'm beyond excited to 7 00:00:35,280 --> 00:00:40,560 Emily Tisch Sussman: have on an icon in the Broadway world, Jessica Vosk. 8 00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:45,320 Emily Tisch Sussman: She's graced Broadway stages with performances as Alphaba and Wicked, Jenna, 9 00:00:45,400 --> 00:00:48,920 Emily Tisch Sussman: and Waitress, and currently stars in Hell's Kitchen. Her quick 10 00:00:48,920 --> 00:00:52,400 Emily Tisch Sussman: wit and crystal voice captured the hearts of theater lovers. 11 00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:56,360 Emily Tisch Sussman: A sharp and witty woman who loves Broadway my kind 12 00:00:56,400 --> 00:01:00,760 Emily Tisch Sussman: of girl, so as you can imagine, we bonded instantly 13 00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:03,720 Emily Tisch Sussman: when we met. I remember thinking, how have we not 14 00:01:03,760 --> 00:01:07,119 Emily Tisch Sussman: known each other forever? Jessica is truly one of those 15 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:10,399 Emily Tisch Sussman: people who lights up every room she walks into, and 16 00:01:10,480 --> 00:01:14,680 Emily Tisch Sussman: maybe unexpected of artists, She's practical and logical to her core, 17 00:01:15,480 --> 00:01:18,840 Emily Tisch Sussman: so much so that she dropped her pursuit of musical 18 00:01:18,920 --> 00:01:23,440 Emily Tisch Sussman: theater in college and instead went into finance, fully believing 19 00:01:23,560 --> 00:01:26,640 Emily Tisch Sussman: she was closing the musical chapter of her life. She 20 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:29,920 Emily Tisch Sussman: worked her way up on Wall Street, but something was 21 00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:33,759 Emily Tisch Sussman: always gnawing at her, an itch that just wouldn't go away. 22 00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:38,040 Emily Tisch Sussman: In this episode, Jessica shares how she made the terrifying 23 00:01:38,160 --> 00:01:42,360 Emily Tisch Sussman: leap from a stable career in finance to chasing her 24 00:01:42,520 --> 00:01:46,280 Emily Tisch Sussman: dream on stage. But and this is the part we 25 00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:49,960 Emily Tisch Sussman: don't talk about enough, it didn't all click into place 26 00:01:50,120 --> 00:01:54,160 Emily Tisch Sussman: right away. Jessica didn't leave the finance job and land 27 00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:57,360 Emily Tisch Sussman: a Broadway roll the next week. In fact, there were 28 00:01:57,480 --> 00:02:01,040 Emily Tisch Sussman: years of struggle she had to build from the ground up. 29 00:02:01,560 --> 00:02:05,280 Emily Tisch Sussman: She babysat, did odd jobs, and went to every audition 30 00:02:05,360 --> 00:02:08,480 Emily Tisch Sussman: and networking opportunity she could. And it wasn't just the 31 00:02:08,520 --> 00:02:12,880 Emily Tisch Sussman: career challenges. There were personal ones too. In fact, Jessica 32 00:02:12,960 --> 00:02:17,120 Emily Tisch Sussman: shared something she's never talked about publicly before, a low 33 00:02:17,160 --> 00:02:21,040 Emily Tisch Sussman: point that now, in hindsight, has allowed her to blossom 34 00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:23,400 Emily Tisch Sussman: into the person and to the career she has now. 35 00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:27,760 Emily Tisch Sussman: Jessica opened up about her experience dealing with alcohol and 36 00:02:27,880 --> 00:02:31,880 Emily Tisch Sussman: ultimately her decision to go to rehab. This conversation is 37 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:36,120 Emily Tisch Sussman: real and raw, but also full of laughter, because that's 38 00:02:36,160 --> 00:02:41,560 Emily Tisch Sussman: who Jessica is. She's honest, she's brave, and she's wildly talented, 39 00:02:41,720 --> 00:02:47,320 Emily Tisch Sussman: and I'm so lucky to call her a friend. Enjoy. 40 00:02:48,320 --> 00:02:53,080 Jessica Vosk: I'm Jessica Vosk and I am a Broadway performer. But 41 00:02:53,120 --> 00:02:54,919 Jessica Vosk: I would also say that I'm kind of a jack 42 00:02:55,040 --> 00:03:04,880 Jessica Vosk: tress of all trades. Which trades, oh gosh, business, marketing, singing, acting. 43 00:03:06,240 --> 00:03:08,960 Jessica Vosk: If you want me to dance, I will, but you 44 00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:14,800 Jessica Vosk: shouldn't pay me. Teaching just entrepreneurialism, I would say. But 45 00:03:14,880 --> 00:03:16,640 Jessica Vosk: let's go back to a little jess Yeah, so, like, 46 00:03:16,840 --> 00:03:18,200 Jessica Vosk: what did you think you were going to be when 47 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:22,240 Jessica Vosk: you grow up? Oh? Man, A lawyer? A lawyer. I 48 00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:25,880 Jessica Vosk: was pretty heavy from grade school on into criminal justice. 49 00:03:26,520 --> 00:03:29,359 Jessica Vosk: Any class, any ap class that I could possibly take 50 00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:33,760 Jessica Vosk: that had to do with debate, or again crime and 51 00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:37,080 Jessica Vosk: justice where we got to visit prisons or have you know, 52 00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:41,400 Jessica Vosk: very in depth conversations and debates about current trials happening 53 00:03:41,440 --> 00:03:43,000 Jessica Vosk: at the time was my bread and butter. 54 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:47,640 Emily Tisch Sussman: Did you have a performer? You clearly have a performer gene, 55 00:03:47,640 --> 00:03:49,680 Emily Tisch Sussman: but liked were you one of those little kids who 56 00:03:49,760 --> 00:03:53,119 Emily Tisch Sussman: is like just looking to perform all the time? Yeah? 57 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:56,480 Jessica Vosk: I was. I got bitten by the singing bug maybe 58 00:03:56,520 --> 00:03:59,360 Jessica Vosk: at like three years old. My dad had a band 59 00:03:59,440 --> 00:04:01,880 Jessica Vosk: when he was young, before he left that life and 60 00:04:01,920 --> 00:04:06,280 Jessica Vosk: went into pharmaceuticals. He was a singer, had like a 61 00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:09,880 Jessica Vosk: Crosby Stills, Nash Young kind of band, very harmonic, and 62 00:04:09,960 --> 00:04:11,760 Jessica Vosk: so I used to sing with him in the living 63 00:04:11,800 --> 00:04:14,960 Jessica Vosk: room when I was three, And so from that point on, 64 00:04:15,600 --> 00:04:19,920 Jessica Vosk: I did as many community theater things as I could. 65 00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:25,000 Jessica Vosk: I auditioned for all the school shows. I loved it all. 66 00:04:25,080 --> 00:04:27,599 Jessica Vosk: I would sit in my room for hours just singing 67 00:04:28,200 --> 00:04:32,159 Jessica Vosk: along to the cassette tips of my favorite Broadway shows 68 00:04:32,360 --> 00:04:35,719 Jessica Vosk: and my favorite singers. I mean it was I think 69 00:04:35,960 --> 00:04:38,200 Jessica Vosk: I was trying and tell people I feel music so 70 00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:42,279 Jessica Vosk: physically in my body that it's hard to explain. 71 00:04:43,360 --> 00:04:45,800 Emily Tisch Sussman: If you had this performer bug in you and you 72 00:04:45,960 --> 00:04:50,039 Emily Tisch Sussman: were doing the community theaters and the shows, why didn't 73 00:04:50,080 --> 00:04:53,040 Emily Tisch Sussman: you think of that as your future as your career? 74 00:04:53,720 --> 00:04:54,599 Emily Tisch Sussman: You know what I At first? 75 00:04:54,680 --> 00:04:57,880 Jessica Vosk: I did. At first, I did after the lawyer thing. 76 00:04:57,920 --> 00:05:00,240 Jessica Vosk: I mean, I remember my mom got a call from 77 00:05:00,240 --> 00:05:01,920 Jessica Vosk: one of my grade school teachers and they were like, 78 00:05:02,400 --> 00:05:09,400 Jessica Vosk: Jess is really phenomenal with law and considered really pushing 79 00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:11,560 Jessica Vosk: her to do something like that. And then I got 80 00:05:11,640 --> 00:05:15,440 Jessica Vosk: really into high school plays and musicals and choir and 81 00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:20,640 Jessica Vosk: all that stuff, and I did think at that point, Okay, 82 00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:23,040 Jessica Vosk: is this possible? Can I do this for a living? 83 00:05:24,120 --> 00:05:27,359 Jessica Vosk: You know, Broadway is such a feels so very far off. 84 00:05:27,440 --> 00:05:30,240 Jessica Vosk: It feels i'd go see Broadway shows. I you know, 85 00:05:30,440 --> 00:05:32,360 Jessica Vosk: was the kid that stayed at the stage door fingers 86 00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:35,400 Jessica Vosk: crossed Kodak camera. Am I going to meet the Broadway stars? 87 00:05:35,440 --> 00:05:38,000 Jessica Vosk: What is it like? Oh my god, wigs, makeup? 88 00:05:38,279 --> 00:05:38,520 Emily Tisch Sussman: You know. 89 00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:43,680 Jessica Vosk: It seemed so otherworldly and not attainable. And yet by 90 00:05:43,720 --> 00:05:46,000 Jessica Vosk: the time I became a senior in high school, I 91 00:05:46,040 --> 00:05:51,360 Jessica Vosk: thought that I would eventually become a Broadway performer. And 92 00:05:51,440 --> 00:05:55,159 Jessica Vosk: I did get into a school for musical theater, and 93 00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:59,560 Jessica Vosk: so I did go for a semester to a musical 94 00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:03,039 Jessica Vosk: theater program. But while I was there, I just was 95 00:06:03,120 --> 00:06:06,839 Jessica Vosk: kind of disenchanted, I guess, and it wasn't for me. 96 00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:10,279 Jessica Vosk: So I quickly was like, well, shit, if this isn't 97 00:06:10,320 --> 00:06:13,080 Jessica Vosk: for me, then maybe am I not supposed to be 98 00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:18,599 Jessica Vosk: doing this thing? So then I pivoted and disenchanted by what. 99 00:06:19,440 --> 00:06:20,560 Jessica Vosk: You know, it was one of the It was a 100 00:06:20,600 --> 00:06:25,840 Jessica Vosk: private program, and I kind of had this mentality of 101 00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:27,560 Jessica Vosk: why am I not just going in auditioning? 102 00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:27,800 Speaker 3: Right? 103 00:06:27,839 --> 00:06:30,640 Jessica Vosk: Now in New York for stuff. Not that I thought 104 00:06:30,680 --> 00:06:32,800 Jessica Vosk: I was better than anybody else, That's not at all 105 00:06:32,839 --> 00:06:37,000 Jessica Vosk: what I thought. But I also knew that it was 106 00:06:37,560 --> 00:06:41,839 Jessica Vosk: a lot of money to go there, and you know, 107 00:06:41,880 --> 00:06:44,479 Jessica Vosk: I also knew that not everybody in the program was 108 00:06:45,279 --> 00:06:48,839 Jessica Vosk: going to make it, and I didn't know why the 109 00:06:48,880 --> 00:06:51,280 Jessica Vosk: teachers were acting like everybody was going to just immediately 110 00:06:51,320 --> 00:06:54,599 Jessica Vosk: get to Broadway once those four years were done. And 111 00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:57,520 Jessica Vosk: then after those four years, if you don't get to Broadway, 112 00:06:57,600 --> 00:07:00,760 Jessica Vosk: you're saddled with what the tons of debt? And then 113 00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:04,080 Jessica Vosk: what right you're in a program where you're singing, acting, 114 00:07:04,120 --> 00:07:06,360 Jessica Vosk: and dancing all day long, But then what's the other 115 00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:10,360 Jessica Vosk: You're not getting any other skill that is being presented 116 00:07:10,400 --> 00:07:15,440 Jessica Vosk: in these programs. So I left, and you know, my 117 00:07:15,520 --> 00:07:18,040 Jessica Vosk: parents said, Okay, well you aren't not going to school, 118 00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:22,960 Jessica Vosk: so pick another school in state so it's nice and 119 00:07:23,640 --> 00:07:27,800 Jessica Vosk: financially sound, and I chowed a different major. And that 120 00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:30,360 Jessica Vosk: was really that I didn't I kind of didn't look 121 00:07:30,400 --> 00:07:32,800 Jessica Vosk: back as far as musical theater was concerned. 122 00:07:34,280 --> 00:07:38,680 Emily Tisch Sussman: Jessica moved on and started a communications investor relations program. 123 00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:41,840 Emily Tisch Sussman: But the nail in the coffin was really when she 124 00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:44,760 Emily Tisch Sussman: auditioned for American Idol. 125 00:07:45,560 --> 00:07:49,200 Jessica Vosk: I decided, I believe you know I again, I have 126 00:07:49,240 --> 00:07:51,560 Jessica Vosk: to think about it was early, very early on. I 127 00:07:51,560 --> 00:07:53,920 Jessica Vosk: think it must have been really right after I left 128 00:07:54,200 --> 00:07:58,920 Jessica Vosk: music theater school and I was in college, because I 129 00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:01,240 Jessica Vosk: think about the boyfriend that I was with, So it 130 00:08:01,280 --> 00:08:05,560 Jessica Vosk: was early on. Iimatt and I auditioned for America. I 131 00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:07,400 Jessica Vosk: had very early on in the season and it was 132 00:08:07,440 --> 00:08:12,880 Jessica Vosk: a held at Giant Stadium in New Jersey and thousands 133 00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:15,040 Jessica Vosk: of people showed up. It was like maybe two the 134 00:08:15,160 --> 00:08:17,840 Jessica Vosk: season after Kelly Clarkson, or two seasons after Kelly Clarkson, 135 00:08:17,840 --> 00:08:21,360 Jessica Vosk: so it's like the Jam and no social media, nothing 136 00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:25,160 Jessica Vosk: like that, nothing, nothing existed. Yet you show up, you 137 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:30,160 Jessica Vosk: get a number the audition for the executive producers. I 138 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:32,240 Jessica Vosk: made it through. I have to go back into a 139 00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:34,520 Jessica Vosk: holding room. I have to sign a stack of papers 140 00:08:34,920 --> 00:08:38,959 Jessica Vosk: of course, giving your entire life away should you make 141 00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:40,680 Jessica Vosk: it onto the show, but you don't care at the 142 00:08:40,679 --> 00:08:44,920 Jessica Vosk: time because it's American Idol. And I then made it 143 00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:48,480 Jessica Vosk: through to the producers. After the producers, I made it 144 00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:51,920 Jessica Vosk: through again to the judges. So now we're like the 145 00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:54,520 Jessica Vosk: amount of time that passes in between these auditions is 146 00:08:54,520 --> 00:08:56,800 Jessica Vosk: about a year. So they take a polaroid of view 147 00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:59,360 Jessica Vosk: in the outfit that you're in on the first time 148 00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:02,320 Jessica Vosk: for content annuity, to make sure that you have it 149 00:09:02,400 --> 00:09:05,480 Jessica Vosk: for the judges because it looks like they're filming everything 150 00:09:05,760 --> 00:09:09,160 Jessica Vosk: at the same time. So then I showed up at 151 00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:13,640 Jessica Vosk: Chelsea Pears, which is where the third and final audition 152 00:09:14,360 --> 00:09:18,720 Jessica Vosk: was for Simon, Paula and Randy and Ryan Seacrest was 153 00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:20,520 Jessica Vosk: there and you were allowed to bite your family. So 154 00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:24,360 Jessica Vosk: my family drove all the way out from Pennsylvania. My 155 00:09:24,600 --> 00:09:27,120 Jessica Vosk: boyfriend came and they all wait on one side of 156 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,199 Jessica Vosk: the room and you and everybody else, all the other 157 00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:31,760 Jessica Vosk: contestants are on the other side of the room, and 158 00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:35,840 Jessica Vosk: it was wild. The celebrity judges did not show up 159 00:09:35,840 --> 00:09:38,599 Jessica Vosk: for twelve hours. We were stuck in there for twelve hours. 160 00:09:38,880 --> 00:09:41,439 Jessica Vosk: They did the thing where they came around and sort 161 00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:43,800 Jessica Vosk: of interview you on camera. The producers come around and 162 00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:45,880 Jessica Vosk: one producer who took a liking to me and said, 163 00:09:45,880 --> 00:09:47,600 Jessica Vosk: you know, is there anything in your life like have 164 00:09:47,640 --> 00:09:51,000 Jessica Vosk: you ever been a meth addict? Have you ever been homeless? 165 00:09:51,320 --> 00:09:55,040 Jessica Vosk: Have you ever gotten pregnant? Do you have a kid somewhere? 166 00:09:55,440 --> 00:09:58,840 Jessica Vosk: And I just I was pretty boring, and I went in. 167 00:09:59,240 --> 00:10:02,600 Jessica Vosk: Finally the judge showed up. They asked all of us 168 00:10:03,120 --> 00:10:06,040 Jessica Vosk: to come back. Actually, they said, the judges are really tired. 169 00:10:06,760 --> 00:10:08,480 Jessica Vosk: They just got here. They don't want to do this 170 00:10:08,559 --> 00:10:10,280 Jessica Vosk: and be on camera, but we're leaving it up to 171 00:10:10,280 --> 00:10:12,160 Jessica Vosk: you if you want to audition or not. And all 172 00:10:12,240 --> 00:10:14,679 Jessica Vosk: of us were like, our families are here, we've been 173 00:10:14,679 --> 00:10:17,000 Jessica Vosk: here for twelve hours, we're auditioning. Well, none of us 174 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:19,720 Jessica Vosk: made it through, and they were they were in shitty moods. 175 00:10:19,840 --> 00:10:22,760 Jessica Vosk: Let's not let's not lie. But I got in. I 176 00:10:22,760 --> 00:10:28,280 Jessica Vosk: sank alone by heart, and Simon said I was desperate, 177 00:10:29,120 --> 00:10:32,440 Jessica Vosk: and I was like, just don't do anything on camera 178 00:10:32,520 --> 00:10:34,280 Jessica Vosk: because it's going to make it on TV if you 179 00:10:34,360 --> 00:10:36,800 Jessica Vosk: do something crazy on camera. Don't do anything on camera. 180 00:10:36,880 --> 00:10:39,360 Jessica Vosk: And Ryan Seacrest has an earpiece in and they all 181 00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:41,160 Jessica Vosk: have earpieces, and so you leave the room and the 182 00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:42,880 Jessica Vosk: camera follows you all the way out to the car, 183 00:10:42,920 --> 00:10:46,120 Jessica Vosk: and I just was tunnel vision again, very eyes to 184 00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:50,000 Jessica Vosk: the floor, don't say anything. And I remember we got 185 00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:53,040 Jessica Vosk: on the train, my boyfriend and I back to Montclair, 186 00:10:53,120 --> 00:10:54,920 Jessica Vosk: New Jersey, where I was living at the time, because 187 00:10:54,920 --> 00:10:57,960 Jessica Vosk: that's where I was going to college and I was 188 00:10:58,240 --> 00:11:02,559 Jessica Vosk: a mess. I was so embarrassed. I ad a hamburger 189 00:11:03,320 --> 00:11:07,400 Jessica Vosk: at the local pub and it was mostly just embarrassment 190 00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:10,640 Jessica Vosk: and probably a little bit of anger, but that was 191 00:11:10,679 --> 00:11:13,400 Jessica Vosk: a core memory. And yes, for me, it was like, Okay, 192 00:11:13,520 --> 00:11:17,240 Jessica Vosk: I'm done. I am yeah, Nail and Coffin. I don't 193 00:11:17,240 --> 00:11:19,000 Jessica Vosk: need to do this. I shouldn't be doing this. I 194 00:11:19,040 --> 00:11:22,480 Jessica Vosk: don't know why I thought I could do this. I'm done. 195 00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:25,240 Emily Tisch Sussman: So is that what took you in that direction? Like, 196 00:11:25,320 --> 00:11:28,840 Emily Tisch Sussman: is that you know why finance? Why corporate America in 197 00:11:28,880 --> 00:11:31,560 Emily Tisch Sussman: the first place that you were like, this feels this 198 00:11:31,600 --> 00:11:33,760 Emily Tisch Sussman: feels secure, this feels safe, and that was what you 199 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:36,600 Emily Tisch Sussman: were aiming for at that point, Yeah. 200 00:11:36,520 --> 00:11:39,800 Jessica Vosk: It was, it was it was how to Honestly, it 201 00:11:39,840 --> 00:11:42,199 Jessica Vosk: was mostly me thinking about what would make my parents proud. 202 00:11:42,240 --> 00:11:44,880 Jessica Vosk: I guess I was also really embarrassed that they had 203 00:11:44,920 --> 00:11:48,720 Jessica Vosk: to be there for the American Idol thing. And you know, 204 00:11:49,160 --> 00:11:52,840 Jessica Vosk: a career path. My parents did practical things. You know, 205 00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:56,800 Jessica Vosk: my parents both have artistic qualities. My mom actually was 206 00:11:56,840 --> 00:12:00,480 Jessica Vosk: an artist, a graphic designer. She sketched and painted. But 207 00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:03,600 Jessica Vosk: then when in real estate, my father had a fantastic band, 208 00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:06,320 Jessica Vosk: he could sing, he went into pharmaceuticals, like it was 209 00:12:06,400 --> 00:12:10,760 Jessica Vosk: the typical boomer trajectory. And so I think there was 210 00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:12,240 Jessica Vosk: a part of me too that was like, I can't 211 00:12:12,600 --> 00:12:15,120 Jessica Vosk: believe that I went through something like that in front 212 00:12:15,160 --> 00:12:18,440 Jessica Vosk: of my parents, and I'm never going to I'm never 213 00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:20,120 Jessica Vosk: going to allow them to see something like that again. 214 00:12:20,679 --> 00:12:22,520 Jessica Vosk: And that's the first time I'm saying this out loud. 215 00:12:22,600 --> 00:12:25,920 Jessica Vosk: That's interesting, But it sounds like that was like what 216 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:27,760 Jessica Vosk: you saw, like you were following the path of what 217 00:12:27,800 --> 00:12:30,600 Jessica Vosk: you saw, Like, yes, you can love art, but it's 218 00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:34,600 Jessica Vosk: not what you do. What you do is practical, exactly. 219 00:12:35,960 --> 00:12:40,280 Emily Tisch Sussman: And practical she was. She left any dreams of theater behind, 220 00:12:40,640 --> 00:12:44,480 Emily Tisch Sussman: putting one hundred percent into this new corporate path. Jessica 221 00:12:44,559 --> 00:12:48,480 Emily Tisch Sussman: finished early, graduated with honors, and found a job in finance. 222 00:12:49,559 --> 00:12:53,720 Jessica Vosk: I rose the ranks pretty fast at that job. So 223 00:12:53,840 --> 00:12:57,400 Jessica Vosk: for me, I worked a lot with clean energy clients. 224 00:12:57,720 --> 00:13:00,480 Jessica Vosk: So I had, you know, an area of clean energy, 225 00:13:00,679 --> 00:13:03,960 Jessica Vosk: wind energy. I had an area of corporate real estate, 226 00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:05,720 Jessica Vosk: and then I had a personal finance area. So I 227 00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:08,160 Jessica Vosk: sort of like worked in these three areas with clients, 228 00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:10,719 Jessica Vosk: and I would travel most of the day to day 229 00:13:10,880 --> 00:13:13,880 Jessica Vosk: was like in the office. A lot of earnings calls, 230 00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:16,960 Jessica Vosk: a lot of hopping on calls with executives talking about 231 00:13:17,160 --> 00:13:21,880 Jessica Vosk: damage control, if something stock wise happened that we had 232 00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:23,400 Jessica Vosk: to talk to the press about. There was a lot 233 00:13:23,400 --> 00:13:28,840 Jessica Vosk: of liaising between press and sea level suite, and then 234 00:13:28,840 --> 00:13:31,040 Jessica Vosk: there was a ton of like three days of the week, 235 00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:33,880 Jessica Vosk: I'd be in Texas doing something for this wind energy client, 236 00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:35,400 Jessica Vosk: or I would have to fly out to San Francisco 237 00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:38,600 Jessica Vosk: and do something for this personal finance company and be 238 00:13:38,679 --> 00:13:41,520 Jessica Vosk: with them. So it was a lot of back and 239 00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:44,720 Jessica Vosk: forth and taught me a lot about if I'm going 240 00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:46,360 Jessica Vosk: to a lunch, it's either going to be with a client, 241 00:13:46,440 --> 00:13:48,000 Jessica Vosk: or it's going to be with one of the head 242 00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:50,280 Jessica Vosk: requorters of the FT or the Wall Street Journal and 243 00:13:50,480 --> 00:13:54,560 Jessica Vosk: sitting with them to place a story or to make 244 00:13:54,600 --> 00:13:56,640 Jessica Vosk: sure a story doesn't get placed store to you know, 245 00:13:57,480 --> 00:14:00,760 Jessica Vosk: it's that kind of again, jack of all trades, ability 246 00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:05,959 Jessica Vosk: to be that chameleon within the job. So I rose 247 00:14:06,040 --> 00:14:07,920 Jessica Vosk: Arin's pretty fast at that job. It was it was 248 00:14:07,960 --> 00:14:09,720 Jessica Vosk: the type of thing where we were working with enough 249 00:14:10,280 --> 00:14:14,480 Jessica Vosk: sea level executives and doing enough pitches where it felt 250 00:14:14,679 --> 00:14:17,440 Jessica Vosk: like I was the person to be in the room 251 00:14:17,559 --> 00:14:21,560 Jessica Vosk: because I was really good at volleying and improving and 252 00:14:21,640 --> 00:14:25,720 Jessica Vosk: kind of now I would call it auditioning or walking 253 00:14:25,720 --> 00:14:28,800 Jessica Vosk: into a room or being you know that type of 254 00:14:28,840 --> 00:14:30,960 Jessica Vosk: person where you can throw me anything and I'll be 255 00:14:31,040 --> 00:14:34,960 Jessica Vosk: able to come back with something. So it was kind 256 00:14:34,960 --> 00:14:38,120 Jessica Vosk: of fun for me at the time. But nobody, nobody 257 00:14:38,160 --> 00:14:41,120 Jessica Vosk: there knew that I could sing, or that I was 258 00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:43,800 Jessica Vosk: a theater girly under wraps. 259 00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:46,880 Emily Tisch Sussman: But really you were pulling from your theater background to 260 00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:51,000 Emily Tisch Sussman: be successful in investor relations and in business. Yes, yes, 261 00:14:51,120 --> 00:14:53,520 Emily Tisch Sussman: so I didn't know that, right, but I love that, 262 00:14:53,640 --> 00:14:56,600 Emily Tisch Sussman: Like already the seeds are planted. It's like a little foreshadowing. 263 00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:59,640 Emily Tisch Sussman: It totally was Oh I love that. Okay, So I 264 00:14:59,680 --> 00:15:02,160 Emily Tisch Sussman: think a lot about what success looks like at different 265 00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:05,160 Emily Tisch Sussman: points in our lives. What do you think success was 266 00:15:05,240 --> 00:15:06,840 Emily Tisch Sussman: for you at that point? 267 00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:11,000 Jessica Vosk: Money, health, insurance, the ability to say, like, I have 268 00:15:11,040 --> 00:15:15,240 Jessica Vosk: a job that I'm locked into, I work with all 269 00:15:15,280 --> 00:15:19,880 Jessica Vosk: of these great large companies that are you know, foreign 270 00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:22,320 Jessica Vosk: companies going public on the US market. Look at all 271 00:15:22,360 --> 00:15:25,480 Jessica Vosk: of my jargon. I'm very very smart. I think that 272 00:15:25,640 --> 00:15:28,440 Jessica Vosk: was success to me at the time. It wasn't necessarily happiness. 273 00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:32,560 Jessica Vosk: So it was a really interesting thing because it became 274 00:15:33,280 --> 00:15:35,480 Jessica Vosk: you know, how do I become the best at this 275 00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:40,200 Jessica Vosk: at this but I also didn't love it, so at 276 00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:42,920 Jessica Vosk: the time, I didn't realize that what I thought of 277 00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:46,400 Jessica Vosk: as success was actually hindering me. 278 00:15:47,160 --> 00:15:49,480 Emily Tisch Sussman: Well, you've shared that when you were working in finance 279 00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:52,760 Emily Tisch Sussman: you started having panic attacks. What do you think drove 280 00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:55,440 Emily Tisch Sussman: those and did those change how you were thinking about 281 00:15:55,440 --> 00:15:57,120 Emily Tisch Sussman: your career? Yeah? 282 00:15:57,200 --> 00:15:59,760 Jessica Vosk: I mean when I was in this place of giving 283 00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:02,760 Jessica Vosk: pits every day or doing client pitches in a boardroom, 284 00:16:02,880 --> 00:16:07,760 Jessica Vosk: or I would be so stressed out and I couldn't 285 00:16:07,840 --> 00:16:11,360 Jessica Vosk: understand why. And I was on all these different time 286 00:16:11,440 --> 00:16:15,160 Jessica Vosk: zones because when the market opens in Portugal, it's the 287 00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:19,120 Jessica Vosk: middle of the night here, but then you know, I 288 00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:21,400 Jessica Vosk: still have to keep up with San Francisco and that's 289 00:16:21,440 --> 00:16:24,240 Jessica Vosk: three hours behind. It was not I didn't have a 290 00:16:24,240 --> 00:16:26,480 Jessica Vosk: body clock, and I didn't again, I was in my twenties. 291 00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:29,920 Jessica Vosk: I was burning the candle at both ends with this job. 292 00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:35,240 Jessica Vosk: And then I think what happened with my subconscious knowing 293 00:16:35,600 --> 00:16:38,600 Jessica Vosk: that I wasn't doing the thing that I loved, and 294 00:16:38,680 --> 00:16:43,400 Jessica Vosk: I wasn't experiencing any art, and I wasn't going to 295 00:16:43,440 --> 00:16:47,480 Jessica Vosk: any therapy or talking to anybody or confiding in anybody. 296 00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:51,800 Jessica Vosk: Is that stress is a silent killer. It really does kill. 297 00:16:52,320 --> 00:16:57,120 Jessica Vosk: In my experience, it manifested itself through sweating and my 298 00:16:57,240 --> 00:16:59,840 Jessica Vosk: heart rate going through the roof and feeling like I 299 00:16:59,880 --> 00:17:02,400 Jessica Vosk: was going to die. But I couldn't understand what that was. 300 00:17:02,520 --> 00:17:04,320 Jessica Vosk: I didn't know what anxiety was. I didn't know what 301 00:17:04,320 --> 00:17:07,560 Jessica Vosk: panic attacks were. I sort of just thought, like, gosh, 302 00:17:07,600 --> 00:17:10,040 Jessica Vosk: am I getting nervous for these meetings. I don't understand 303 00:17:10,200 --> 00:17:13,880 Jessica Vosk: why I would be so every single day too, You're 304 00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:16,679 Jessica Vosk: going out to lunches, and in order to quell the anxiety, 305 00:17:16,720 --> 00:17:20,080 Jessica Vosk: you're having like three glasses of wine with lunch, and 306 00:17:20,119 --> 00:17:22,000 Jessica Vosk: then you're doing the same thing at dinner. So that 307 00:17:22,080 --> 00:17:25,200 Jessica Vosk: became a whole other you know, well, in order to 308 00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:27,000 Jessica Vosk: get rid of my anxiety, I've got to have a drink. 309 00:17:27,400 --> 00:17:29,680 Jessica Vosk: And so it kind of was this hand in hand thing. 310 00:17:29,720 --> 00:17:33,760 Jessica Vosk: It was very very slippery slope at that point in 311 00:17:33,760 --> 00:17:36,919 Jessica Vosk: my life. Did that make you think that you were 312 00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:38,160 Jessica Vosk: eventually going to leave? 313 00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:38,320 Jessica Vosk: Like? 314 00:17:38,400 --> 00:17:39,320 Emily Tisch Sussman: Was that a pivot point? 315 00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:40,919 Emily Tisch Sussman: Where is that what we call sort of like the 316 00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:44,160 Emily Tisch Sussman: intervening life event where we start to think about what's 317 00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:45,919 Emily Tisch Sussman: making us happy at that point or not making us 318 00:17:45,960 --> 00:17:47,680 Emily Tisch Sussman: happy and precipitates the change. 319 00:17:48,280 --> 00:17:51,080 Jessica Vosk: Yeah, I mean, I think there was. It was a 320 00:17:51,280 --> 00:17:56,600 Jessica Vosk: very night light sprinkling of what's going on here, but 321 00:17:56,720 --> 00:18:00,119 Jessica Vosk: not really understanding how to figure that out. And I 322 00:18:00,160 --> 00:18:05,280 Jessica Vosk: mean my pivot moment, my true pivot moment, was when 323 00:18:05,680 --> 00:18:09,040 Jessica Vosk: kind of the universe stepped in and I was sitting 324 00:18:09,080 --> 00:18:11,919 Jessica Vosk: in my office. At this point, I was promoted to 325 00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:16,600 Jessica Vosk: my own office, so I had people underneath me, and 326 00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:19,000 Jessica Vosk: I had been sitting in my office and I again 327 00:18:19,320 --> 00:18:24,200 Jessica Vosk: totally sort of checked out, disassociating, knocked something over, saw 328 00:18:24,240 --> 00:18:26,720 Jessica Vosk: a note that fell out of a folder. I don't 329 00:18:26,720 --> 00:18:29,879 Jessica Vosk: know where or how this happened from my grandmother that 330 00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:32,080 Jessica Vosk: said I wish you all the luck in the world 331 00:18:32,160 --> 00:18:34,639 Jessica Vosk: that she wrote to me, like after a theater show 332 00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:37,639 Jessica Vosk: or something. And that's when I was like, I gotta go. 333 00:18:38,040 --> 00:18:41,200 Jessica Vosk: I have to go. I don't know how. I don't 334 00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:45,920 Jessica Vosk: literally know how to go. But that kicked off the 335 00:18:46,080 --> 00:18:49,720 Jessica Vosk: pivot of the next six months of how to make 336 00:18:49,760 --> 00:18:50,480 Jessica Vosk: the transition. 337 00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:55,480 Emily Tisch Sussman: When we come back, Jessica walks us through the mechanics 338 00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:59,879 Emily Tisch Sussman: of her calculated but nevertheless scary pivot out of her 339 00:18:59,880 --> 00:19:01,520 Emily Tisch Sussman: stable job in finance. 340 00:19:10,680 --> 00:19:13,840 Jessica Vosk: I have to go. I don't know how. I don't 341 00:19:13,960 --> 00:19:18,320 Jessica Vosk: literally know how to go. But that kicked off the 342 00:19:18,520 --> 00:19:22,160 Jessica Vosk: pivot of the next six months of how to make 343 00:19:22,200 --> 00:19:28,480 Jessica Vosk: the transition. I had concepts of like, Okay, I need 344 00:19:28,520 --> 00:19:31,840 Jessica Vosk: to leave this job. So what I want to do 345 00:19:32,040 --> 00:19:35,040 Jessica Vosk: is I want to sing. I want to be back 346 00:19:35,560 --> 00:19:38,919 Jessica Vosk: in that life. Okay, how am I going to do that? 347 00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:40,240 Emily Tisch Sussman: Well? 348 00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:44,040 Jessica Vosk: I had kind of met a couple of people within 349 00:19:44,119 --> 00:19:45,880 Jessica Vosk: the business. I had been going to this open mic 350 00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:49,639 Jessica Vosk: night every Monday night after work was over. I'd have 351 00:19:49,680 --> 00:19:52,720 Jessica Vosk: to wait till eleven pm every Monday night to try 352 00:19:52,720 --> 00:19:55,080 Jessica Vosk: and get hurt on this open mic night. And I 353 00:19:55,119 --> 00:19:57,439 Jessica Vosk: met people through that, and I thought, Okay, I've got 354 00:19:57,480 --> 00:19:59,919 Jessica Vosk: a network here and figure out how to get in 355 00:20:00,600 --> 00:20:02,720 Jessica Vosk: like the right room. How am I supposed to audition? 356 00:20:02,800 --> 00:20:05,639 Jessica Vosk: I don't have an agent. I called my parents. I 357 00:20:05,680 --> 00:20:09,440 Jessica Vosk: was like, okay, I'm leaving this job, and they were 358 00:20:09,440 --> 00:20:18,399 Jessica Vosk: like no, no, no, reverse. So they were pretty scared nervous. Again, 359 00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:20,880 Jessica Vosk: like my father in an interview a couple of years 360 00:20:20,880 --> 00:20:23,600 Jessica Vosk: ago said to ABC or something like I thought this 361 00:20:23,760 --> 00:20:26,359 Jessica Vosk: was like the worst decision she's ever made. So no, 362 00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:28,920 Jessica Vosk: I didn't have a plan. I just knew I had 363 00:20:28,960 --> 00:20:31,399 Jessica Vosk: to get laid off because that was the only way 364 00:20:31,400 --> 00:20:34,200 Jessica Vosk: I can collect unemployment. I knew that that if I quit, 365 00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:37,680 Jessica Vosk: I couldn't collect unemployment. If I quit, I wouldn't get severance, 366 00:20:38,160 --> 00:20:40,760 Jessica Vosk: you know, all of that kind of like stuff about 367 00:20:40,760 --> 00:20:44,000 Jessica Vosk: how to. And in the interim I decided to put 368 00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:48,560 Jessica Vosk: together a concert and do a concert and invite all 369 00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:50,600 Jessica Vosk: the finance people to come see it at the Lori 370 00:20:50,680 --> 00:20:53,480 Jessica Vosk: beachmanth Theater on forty second Street between nine and ten 371 00:20:54,119 --> 00:20:58,160 Jessica Vosk: in the basement, and make everybody come see it. As 372 00:20:58,160 --> 00:20:59,960 Jessica Vosk: am I like, this is what I want to do 373 00:21:00,720 --> 00:21:03,480 Jessica Vosk: than while I was still at the job. I don't 374 00:21:03,520 --> 00:21:05,400 Jessica Vosk: know what I was thinking, but I did it. And 375 00:21:06,440 --> 00:21:13,720 Jessica Vosk: subsequently the market crashed in O eight and I skillfully 376 00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:19,560 Jessica Vosk: got laid off. So what happened is the chirp, chirp 377 00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:23,840 Jessica Vosk: chatter of the real estate crash happening, the big banks 378 00:21:24,040 --> 00:21:28,800 Jessica Vosk: going under, etc. Was around the office. I knew we 379 00:21:28,800 --> 00:21:32,639 Jessica Vosk: would either get acquired by a London company or you know, 380 00:21:32,800 --> 00:21:35,760 Jessica Vosk: in order for us to stay afloat with our clientele. 381 00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:38,639 Jessica Vosk: So I was like, Okay, how do I do this. 382 00:21:39,160 --> 00:21:42,200 Jessica Vosk: I go into the HR office and I was like, hey, guys, 383 00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:47,960 Jessica Vosk: pleasure listen. I was just wondering if you were looking 384 00:21:47,960 --> 00:21:52,640 Jessica Vosk: for anybody to volunteer to be laid off because I 385 00:21:52,680 --> 00:21:56,080 Jessica Vosk: will do that. And they were like, you just got promoted, 386 00:21:56,520 --> 00:22:01,200 Jessica Vosk: and I said, oh, well, I'm just saying that if 387 00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:02,879 Jessica Vosk: you were looking for it, and they were like, this 388 00:22:02,920 --> 00:22:05,560 Jessica Vosk: conversation never happened. I think one of the girls who 389 00:22:05,600 --> 00:22:07,359 Jessica Vosk: I was close with had a chat with my boss 390 00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:09,720 Jessica Vosk: and I got an email from him saying a couple 391 00:22:09,760 --> 00:22:11,240 Jessica Vosk: of weeks later saying, hey, can I see you in 392 00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:13,240 Jessica Vosk: my office? And I think anybody else who got this 393 00:22:13,359 --> 00:22:16,800 Jessica Vosk: email in life would probably be like fuck no no. 394 00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:21,959 Jessica Vosk: I was like, yes, this is it, God like it was. 395 00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:24,560 Jessica Vosk: It was that moment for me. I remember going in there, 396 00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:28,639 Jessica Vosk: sitting down, you know, totally faking the O you know, 397 00:22:28,680 --> 00:22:32,320 Jessica Vosk: I can't believe and get it laid off, and of 398 00:22:32,359 --> 00:22:34,800 Jessica Vosk: course he probably faked it too, and everybody thought I 399 00:22:34,840 --> 00:22:37,600 Jessica Vosk: was nuts. Everyone thought I was nuts, said I would 400 00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:41,000 Jessica Vosk: get a certain amount of severance, YadA, YadA, YadA. I left. 401 00:22:41,320 --> 00:22:44,800 Jessica Vosk: I don't remember how soon after I left, but you know, 402 00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:46,800 Jessica Vosk: made sure everybody with kids knew that I could babysit 403 00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:49,320 Jessica Vosk: their kids and kept in touch with them and kind 404 00:22:49,359 --> 00:22:52,800 Jessica Vosk: of supplemented as much as I could. And that was that. 405 00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:56,920 Emily Tisch Sussman: Yeah, how did you once you left the stability, the 406 00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:58,720 Emily Tisch Sussman: thing that you had, that thing that you had been 407 00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:02,680 Emily Tisch Sussman: organizing your life around. How did you make it work 408 00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:05,360 Emily Tisch Sussman: once you started? Was it auditioning? 409 00:23:05,520 --> 00:23:06,160 Jessica Vosk: Because you were. 410 00:23:06,119 --> 00:23:09,719 Emily Tisch Sussman: Also probably you know, a number of years behind everyone 411 00:23:09,760 --> 00:23:12,560 Emily Tisch Sussman: else in experience that had been Yeah. 412 00:23:12,840 --> 00:23:15,760 Jessica Vosk: Way behind, way behind. I mean, I'm at this point 413 00:23:15,840 --> 00:23:18,359 Jessica Vosk: mid to late twenties. Kids are on Broadway now at 414 00:23:18,359 --> 00:23:21,600 Jessica Vosk: twenty two, twenty one, nineteen. So I was so late 415 00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:23,919 Jessica Vosk: to the party. I would show up every day at 416 00:23:23,960 --> 00:23:26,600 Jessica Vosk: six am at the Equity building. I was not an 417 00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:30,080 Jessica Vosk: equity performer. This is back in the day where you 418 00:23:30,119 --> 00:23:34,200 Jessica Vosk: had to sign up in person, not online. Rarely would 419 00:23:34,240 --> 00:23:37,000 Jessica Vosk: you get seen if you were not equity. So it 420 00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:41,600 Jessica Vosk: was it was so hard, man, it was. It was 421 00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:45,760 Jessica Vosk: really hellish. My supplemental income was babysitting. You know, you 422 00:23:45,760 --> 00:23:50,320 Jessica Vosk: can only collect unemployment for so long. And I just 423 00:23:50,440 --> 00:23:52,399 Jessica Vosk: kept doing the same thing over and over and it 424 00:23:52,800 --> 00:23:55,840 Jessica Vosk: is really exhausting. And I know people who do it 425 00:23:56,240 --> 00:23:58,360 Jessica Vosk: for you know, a living day in and day out, 426 00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:01,520 Jessica Vosk: and it is That's so I respect performers so much 427 00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:04,359 Jessica Vosk: because you have to keep putting yourself out there for 428 00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:06,159 Jessica Vosk: people who don't really give a shit. At the end 429 00:24:06,160 --> 00:24:08,040 Jessica Vosk: of the day. A lot of these are required calls. 430 00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:10,639 Jessica Vosk: They have to do these calls. You're never going to 431 00:24:10,680 --> 00:24:14,040 Jessica Vosk: get a phone call about it. And that's what I did. 432 00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:17,800 Jessica Vosk: And it was it's a bit soul sucking. Didn't make 433 00:24:17,840 --> 00:24:21,800 Jessica Vosk: your question your decision. Oh sure, I questioned that. I 434 00:24:21,880 --> 00:24:24,280 Jessica Vosk: questioned my decision every day. I was like, and now 435 00:24:24,280 --> 00:24:27,560 Jessica Vosk: I don't have health insurance. Now I don't have a 436 00:24:27,600 --> 00:24:30,680 Jessica Vosk: four oh one k. Now I don't have a salary 437 00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:33,080 Jessica Vosk: coming at every single week. And I wasn't good with 438 00:24:33,119 --> 00:24:35,080 Jessica Vosk: my money back then. I spent all of my money 439 00:24:35,320 --> 00:24:37,280 Jessica Vosk: when I was at that job. I spent it on clothes. 440 00:24:37,280 --> 00:24:38,840 Jessica Vosk: I spent it on booze, I spent it on dinner, 441 00:24:38,840 --> 00:24:41,240 Jessica Vosk: I spent it on travel. I did you know, It's 442 00:24:41,280 --> 00:24:43,119 Jessica Vosk: not like I sat and saved a bunch of money. 443 00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:44,560 Jessica Vosk: So it's a bit of a wake up call. 444 00:24:46,359 --> 00:24:49,160 Emily Tisch Sussman: The difficulty of making it all work started to wear 445 00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:52,960 Emily Tisch Sussman: on her audition after audition, she was hustling to make 446 00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:56,000 Emily Tisch Sussman: her dreams come true, and what started as a casual 447 00:24:56,160 --> 00:24:58,679 Emily Tisch Sussman: drink here and there turned into a way to cope. 448 00:25:00,320 --> 00:25:04,000 Jessica Vosk: I mean, this is probably the first time ever on 449 00:25:04,080 --> 00:25:10,200 Jessica Vosk: an interview where I'm going to say that I relied 450 00:25:10,440 --> 00:25:15,760 Jessica Vosk: so much on alcohol to get me through the latter 451 00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:20,160 Jessica Vosk: couple of years of that that I wound up with 452 00:25:20,280 --> 00:25:24,280 Jessica Vosk: such a problem with alcohol that I had to, at 453 00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:30,280 Jessica Vosk: the age twenty nine, go to a rehab for twenty days. 454 00:25:30,359 --> 00:25:35,359 Jessica Vosk: And I've never publicly talked about that before. First of all, 455 00:25:35,760 --> 00:25:37,480 Jessica Vosk: for the first time in my life, I can say 456 00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:40,760 Jessica Vosk: that I told everybody I would never go into a 457 00:25:40,800 --> 00:25:44,600 Jessica Vosk: program of rehab. No, no, no, I am way better 458 00:25:44,680 --> 00:25:48,320 Jessica Vosk: than these people. I am not as bad as these people. 459 00:25:49,040 --> 00:25:51,720 Jessica Vosk: And then it was one of those things where I 460 00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:53,560 Jessica Vosk: had to actually talk to my parents about it, and 461 00:25:53,560 --> 00:25:55,720 Jessica Vosk: they said, no, you're going, and I was like, I'm not, 462 00:25:56,520 --> 00:26:00,159 Jessica Vosk: and they won. And then when I got there, I 463 00:26:00,240 --> 00:26:04,480 Jessica Vosk: remember being very taken aback because I was there with lawyers, 464 00:26:04,600 --> 00:26:06,160 Jessica Vosk: and I was there with doctors, and I was there 465 00:26:06,160 --> 00:26:08,320 Jessica Vosk: with pharmacists, and I was there with nurses, and I 466 00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:10,240 Jessica Vosk: was there with all of these people who I held 467 00:26:10,440 --> 00:26:13,560 Jessica Vosk: in high regard in life circumstances, who all had the 468 00:26:13,560 --> 00:26:16,240 Jessica Vosk: same problems that I did. And those twenty days of 469 00:26:16,240 --> 00:26:18,320 Jessica Vosk: my life was the first time that I ever had 470 00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:22,560 Jessica Vosk: tools put into a toolbox of how to handle emotion 471 00:26:22,760 --> 00:26:25,320 Jessica Vosk: and how to handle mental health and how to handle 472 00:26:25,560 --> 00:26:30,200 Jessica Vosk: anxiety and possible depression and how to handle the fact 473 00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:33,520 Jessica Vosk: that we're all addicted to something. So I didn't have 474 00:26:33,560 --> 00:26:35,159 Jessica Vosk: the use of my phone at that time, which is 475 00:26:35,200 --> 00:26:38,639 Jessica Vosk: another addiction. I didn't have the ability to talk to 476 00:26:38,720 --> 00:26:41,800 Jessica Vosk: really the outside world. I had therapy. I had therapy, 477 00:26:42,000 --> 00:26:43,560 Jessica Vosk: really for the first time in my life, to have 478 00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:46,080 Jessica Vosk: to sit and really do therapy, and then you learn 479 00:26:46,080 --> 00:26:48,680 Jessica Vosk: who you are. By the time I had left again 480 00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:52,959 Jessica Vosk: only like thirty days, but I had turned thirty, and 481 00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:57,359 Jessica Vosk: I remember feeling so different and at the time that 482 00:26:57,400 --> 00:27:00,200 Jessica Vosk: I had gotten into those first thirty days, it was 483 00:27:00,440 --> 00:27:02,520 Jessica Vosk: I'm so much better than all of you. I don't 484 00:27:02,560 --> 00:27:04,440 Jessica Vosk: need to be here. And by the time I left, 485 00:27:04,440 --> 00:27:07,080 Jessica Vosk: I was like, you know what, none of us are different. 486 00:27:07,640 --> 00:27:09,960 Jessica Vosk: What a wild thing for me to have such an 487 00:27:10,040 --> 00:27:13,720 Jessica Vosk: ego ego about this. But I think it's important to 488 00:27:13,800 --> 00:27:16,880 Jessica Vosk: my story because that kind of year of my life, 489 00:27:16,920 --> 00:27:19,959 Jessica Vosk: at the end of my twenties, not having I had 490 00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:23,439 Jessica Vosk: done a couple of like really amazing things. I had 491 00:27:23,480 --> 00:27:26,200 Jessica Vosk: done Carnegie Hall, a concert at Carnegie Hall with Abba, 492 00:27:26,760 --> 00:27:29,880 Jessica Vosk: and I had done a show with the San Francisco Symphony, 493 00:27:30,359 --> 00:27:32,320 Jessica Vosk: And I think it's important for people to know that 494 00:27:32,680 --> 00:27:36,800 Jessica Vosk: I worked really hard to even be seen for those 495 00:27:37,480 --> 00:27:39,880 Jessica Vosk: to like word of mouth, have somebody be like, Jessica 496 00:27:39,920 --> 00:27:41,720 Jessica Vosk: has a good voice, you should bring her in for 497 00:27:41,760 --> 00:27:45,639 Jessica Vosk: this thing. That my brain got ahead of myself and 498 00:27:45,680 --> 00:27:47,399 Jessica Vosk: I thought, these are going to be my big break. 499 00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:49,680 Jessica Vosk: This is going to be like it for me when 500 00:27:49,680 --> 00:27:52,680 Jessica Vosk: I play Carnegie Hall for the first time, and then 501 00:27:52,680 --> 00:27:55,520 Jessica Vosk: when I do the San Francisco Symphony, this is going 502 00:27:55,560 --> 00:27:57,840 Jessica Vosk: to be everybody's going to want to hire me. And 503 00:27:57,880 --> 00:28:01,639 Jessica Vosk: it was not that. So after that is when I 504 00:28:01,760 --> 00:28:04,920 Jessica Vosk: just like it was a downward spiral for a year 505 00:28:05,320 --> 00:28:09,080 Jessica Vosk: where it or I hit a rock bottom that I 506 00:28:09,240 --> 00:28:14,200 Jessica Vosk: believe was necessary and another impetus for a massive pivot 507 00:28:14,200 --> 00:28:16,920 Jessica Vosk: point in my life to get where I am now. 508 00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:19,680 Jessica Vosk: And all of it ties together because by the time 509 00:28:19,720 --> 00:28:24,439 Jessica Vosk: I left is when I booked Broadway show. So I 510 00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:29,560 Jessica Vosk: had been sober only for a few months, maybe three 511 00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:34,240 Jessica Vosk: or four, and I had gotten called in to audition 512 00:28:34,400 --> 00:28:39,560 Jessica Vosk: for a Broadway show and I didn't again. I don't 513 00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:42,680 Jessica Vosk: know how that happened, but back when I had been 514 00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:46,240 Jessica Vosk: sort of like auditioning all the time, a casting company 515 00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:49,280 Jessica Vosk: kept my headshot and resume. I wasn't right for the thing, 516 00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:51,560 Jessica Vosk: but they decided to keep it and bring me in 517 00:28:51,560 --> 00:28:53,600 Jessica Vosk: for this other thing, and it turns out I booked it. 518 00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:57,520 Jessica Vosk: And I just remember saying like, this would have never 519 00:28:57,560 --> 00:29:00,920 Jessica Vosk: happened if I didn't just go get sober booze, I, 520 00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:02,240 Jessica Vosk: this never would have happened. 521 00:29:02,760 --> 00:29:06,560 Emily Tisch Sussman: Do you think that the rehab gave you access to 522 00:29:06,640 --> 00:29:09,880 Emily Tisch Sussman: the both the emotional tools to be able to book, 523 00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:12,480 Emily Tisch Sussman: but also the fortitude to get through it. 524 00:29:13,080 --> 00:29:15,280 Jessica Vosk: Yeah, I mean I think it gives you vulnerability, right, 525 00:29:15,520 --> 00:29:18,000 Jessica Vosk: I really stand very firmly on the fact that I 526 00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:21,280 Jessica Vosk: think being vulnerable is a superpower that not a lot 527 00:29:21,320 --> 00:29:23,920 Jessica Vosk: of people are willing to access. Is a scary and 528 00:29:24,560 --> 00:29:27,680 Jessica Vosk: you have to be vulnerable if you're in a situation 529 00:29:27,720 --> 00:29:30,200 Jessica Vosk: where you're talking about the thing that took you to 530 00:29:30,280 --> 00:29:34,240 Jessica Vosk: the worst, most low part of your life, where you've 531 00:29:34,280 --> 00:29:36,520 Jessica Vosk: had to you've had to crawl out of that hole 532 00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:41,600 Jessica Vosk: by yourself, without help. And so yeah, I learned a 533 00:29:41,640 --> 00:29:47,200 Jessica Vosk: lot about emotional capability. I was way more open. I 534 00:29:47,360 --> 00:29:51,320 Jessica Vosk: was willing to show a lot more of myself. Was 535 00:29:51,320 --> 00:29:55,720 Jessica Vosk: I ever willing, really until this moment with you publicly 536 00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:57,080 Jessica Vosk: to say I was in a rehab? 537 00:29:57,240 --> 00:29:57,400 Emily Tisch Sussman: No. 538 00:29:57,600 --> 00:30:02,840 Jessica Vosk: I was very embarrassed about it for years, for years, 539 00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:05,640 Jessica Vosk: So that again, I have not ever publicly said it. 540 00:30:05,640 --> 00:30:09,000 Jessica Vosk: People know I don't drink, but nobody knows that I 541 00:30:09,040 --> 00:30:12,880 Jessica Vosk: got help. So again, in that American idol sense, there 542 00:30:12,960 --> 00:30:16,440 Jessica Vosk: was this kind of embarrassment again where I felt like 543 00:30:16,440 --> 00:30:19,160 Jessica Vosk: I embarrassed my family and I felt like I had 544 00:30:19,240 --> 00:30:23,440 Jessica Vosk: put people through this awful thing on my behalf. And 545 00:30:24,280 --> 00:30:26,280 Jessica Vosk: so for a long time it was a very dark, 546 00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:29,640 Jessica Vosk: dark thing for me to talk about. And now I'm 547 00:30:29,680 --> 00:30:32,720 Jessica Vosk: ten years into my Broadway career or I just celebrated 548 00:30:32,760 --> 00:30:37,080 Jessica Vosk: ten years, and I would never be here had I 549 00:30:37,200 --> 00:30:40,440 Jessica Vosk: not gone through that, I never would be here because 550 00:30:40,440 --> 00:30:42,280 Jessica Vosk: I never would have had the tools. 551 00:30:43,880 --> 00:30:47,480 Emily Tisch Sussman: Those tools finally landed her her first role on Broadway. 552 00:30:48,040 --> 00:30:51,040 Emily Tisch Sussman: She made her debut in Bridges of Madison County as 553 00:30:51,160 --> 00:30:54,560 Emily Tisch Sussman: a swing. We dive into what it entails to be 554 00:30:54,720 --> 00:30:58,400 Emily Tisch Sussman: a swing and what came next for Jessica after the break, 555 00:31:12,080 --> 00:31:15,760 Emily Tisch Sussman: And can you just explain because our podcast audience is 556 00:31:15,800 --> 00:31:17,760 Emily Tisch Sussman: not on the theater lovers, although I imagine we were 557 00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:20,880 Emily Tisch Sussman: probably over index for this episode, but just explain what 558 00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:21,640 Emily Tisch Sussman: a swing is. 559 00:31:21,720 --> 00:31:24,400 Jessica Vosk: I think it's pretty critical to understanding for your role here. 560 00:31:24,960 --> 00:31:27,600 Jessica Vosk: So a swing is typically hired on a Broadway show. 561 00:31:27,640 --> 00:31:29,760 Jessica Vosk: There are a number of swings hired on Broadway shows 562 00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:34,680 Jessica Vosk: to cover various tracks who are on stage. So in 563 00:31:34,720 --> 00:31:36,600 Jessica Vosk: particular for the Verges of Madison County, I was hired 564 00:31:36,600 --> 00:31:39,840 Jessica Vosk: as the female swing to cover six different female roles, 565 00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:42,080 Jessica Vosk: so if one of them was out, I would have 566 00:31:42,120 --> 00:31:44,240 Jessica Vosk: to be able to go on. There are people who 567 00:31:44,240 --> 00:31:46,880 Jessica Vosk: make a career out of this who have done twelve 568 00:31:46,880 --> 00:31:48,920 Jessica Vosk: Broadway shows because they hop from show to show to 569 00:31:48,920 --> 00:31:52,680 Jessica Vosk: show because they have the again brain to sort of 570 00:31:52,680 --> 00:31:55,360 Jessica Vosk: play tetris and say, okay, I can go on for 571 00:31:55,400 --> 00:31:56,800 Jessica Vosk: this role right now, and then I'll go on for that. 572 00:31:57,320 --> 00:32:01,680 Jessica Vosk: I am satanically bad at being swing. I mean truly 573 00:32:01,920 --> 00:32:06,760 Jessica Vosk: had to be handheld, walked around the stage, somebody telling 574 00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:08,640 Jessica Vosk: me where to go, what to do, how to act, 575 00:32:08,880 --> 00:32:10,479 Jessica Vosk: what line to say. I mean, it was it was 576 00:32:10,680 --> 00:32:14,479 Jessica Vosk: really I was a terrorist at it, so uh and 577 00:32:14,520 --> 00:32:16,840 Jessica Vosk: it was my own one and done. I never was 578 00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:19,960 Jessica Vosk: a swing on a show again, and so yes it is. 579 00:32:20,080 --> 00:32:22,160 Jessica Vosk: It is actually the hardest role on Broadway. 580 00:32:21,840 --> 00:32:24,760 Emily Tisch Sussman: Though, because you had to know six different roles, and 581 00:32:24,800 --> 00:32:26,960 Emily Tisch Sussman: it can happen at the drop of a half, driving 582 00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:28,880 Emily Tisch Sussman: you like you won't know that day which role you're 583 00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:29,240 Emily Tisch Sussman: going to do. 584 00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:33,240 Jessica Vosk: That's right, which is Wild. It's disgusting. I'm not good 585 00:32:33,280 --> 00:32:36,880 Jessica Vosk: at it. I really like I got I got my 586 00:32:36,960 --> 00:32:39,840 Jessica Vosk: way in to Broadway by being a swing and saying 587 00:32:39,880 --> 00:32:40,640 Jessica Vosk: yes to being a swing. 588 00:32:41,320 --> 00:32:44,680 Emily Tisch Sussman: Never even though you were bad at it, you were 589 00:32:44,760 --> 00:32:46,800 Emily Tisch Sussman: still able to book jumb after. I'm presuming you were 590 00:32:46,840 --> 00:32:48,160 Emily Tisch Sussman: pretty good once you were on the stage. 591 00:32:48,680 --> 00:32:51,280 Jessica Vosk: Yes, and I and I you know again, I'm a 592 00:32:51,280 --> 00:32:55,360 Jessica Vosk: big believer in the universe. And I happened to have 593 00:32:55,480 --> 00:32:58,480 Jessica Vosk: one show scheduled where I went on for a principal 594 00:32:58,480 --> 00:33:02,520 Jessica Vosk: track in Virgis of Medicine, and the composer lyricist Jason 595 00:33:02,560 --> 00:33:05,560 Jessica Vosk: mar Brown, who wrote the show, happened to be conducting 596 00:33:05,600 --> 00:33:08,440 Jessica Vosk: that night, so we had this moment where he got 597 00:33:08,440 --> 00:33:11,120 Jessica Vosk: to see me sing and do my thing on stage. 598 00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:14,880 Jessica Vosk: And after that we really started working together a lot 599 00:33:14,920 --> 00:33:19,200 Jessica Vosk: more outside of the theater. So that led to again 600 00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:22,120 Jessica Vosk: casting seeing me for the next show, which was Finding Neverland. 601 00:33:22,440 --> 00:33:25,640 Jessica Vosk: And then after Finding Neverland, I went into Fiddler on 602 00:33:25,680 --> 00:33:29,400 Jessica Vosk: the Roof on Broadway with Danny Burstein, and after Fiddler 603 00:33:29,400 --> 00:33:31,719 Jessica Vosk: on the Roof came Wicked. So it was all very fast. 604 00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:33,440 Jessica Vosk: It was maybe within the span of three years. 605 00:33:33,560 --> 00:33:38,520 Emily Tisch Sussman: Fifteenth Anniversary Company of Wicked, Please welcome Jessica boss. 606 00:33:40,200 --> 00:33:48,120 Speaker 4: Was sweet Summer, chaphire, scot Feasting, York Billy feasting or 607 00:33:48,440 --> 00:33:51,240 Speaker 4: gush to apologize it. 608 00:34:01,360 --> 00:34:16,000 Emily Tisch Sussman: You want. And then when you booked Wicked, is that 609 00:34:16,040 --> 00:34:18,879 Emily Tisch Sussman: when you felt like, was that like your I made 610 00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:21,000 Emily Tisch Sussman: it moment? Did you have one? Yeah? 611 00:34:21,080 --> 00:34:23,320 Jessica Vosk: That was it. That was my like, I'm leading a 612 00:34:23,400 --> 00:34:28,640 Jessica Vosk: company on Broadway. My parents are able to come see this. 613 00:34:29,400 --> 00:34:31,440 Jessica Vosk: They had seen me on tour, yes, but it was 614 00:34:31,480 --> 00:34:35,680 Jessica Vosk: that like, I'm here on Broadway as a leading lady, 615 00:34:35,800 --> 00:34:39,360 Jessica Vosk: you know, booking Broadway for the first time. I've baby 616 00:34:39,400 --> 00:34:43,000 Jessica Vosk: made it moment for me. It's a very large I've 617 00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:46,520 Jessica Vosk: made it moment for everybody, But for me, I still 618 00:34:46,600 --> 00:34:49,439 Jessica Vosk: wanted I still needed to do other things. I still 619 00:34:49,440 --> 00:34:53,520 Jessica Vosk: had other places to go for Jessica. So by the 620 00:34:53,560 --> 00:34:56,359 Jessica Vosk: time Alphaba came around and it was Broadway and then 621 00:34:56,400 --> 00:34:59,880 Jessica Vosk: I hired a press team and ABC did a profile, 622 00:35:00,160 --> 00:35:02,680 Jessica Vosk: Dateline did a profile and my parents were involved and 623 00:35:02,719 --> 00:35:06,040 Jessica Vosk: they got interviewed. So now I have that footage. It 624 00:35:06,080 --> 00:35:10,880 Jessica Vosk: was this very very wild, book ended thing because within 625 00:35:11,000 --> 00:35:14,840 Jessica Vosk: that ABC interview, all the finance people got interviewed. So 626 00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:19,920 Jessica Vosk: to have my life laid out like that with all 627 00:35:19,960 --> 00:35:23,799 Jessica Vosk: of those people was very very full circle for me. 628 00:35:24,280 --> 00:35:26,640 Jessica Vosk: That's the very full circle thing that I will always remember. 629 00:35:27,760 --> 00:35:30,759 Jessica Vosk: Just really impressed everybody with her energy level. She worked 630 00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:31,800 Jessica Vosk: incredibly hard. 631 00:35:31,640 --> 00:35:34,080 Jessica Vosk: And nothing seemed to face her. It's definitely the emotion 632 00:35:34,200 --> 00:35:39,480 Jessica Vosk: of she's founded and she's so happy, and I think 633 00:35:39,520 --> 00:35:43,480 Jessica Vosk: as a mom, he says, I can't even. 634 00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:46,720 Emily Tisch Sussman: That's why. 635 00:35:48,320 --> 00:35:52,560 Jessica Vosk: It's wild to kind of see these people who hired 636 00:35:52,600 --> 00:35:55,640 Jessica Vosk: me when I was this kid out of college being 637 00:35:55,680 --> 00:35:59,120 Jessica Vosk: interviewed and going like, well, we thought, what are you doing? 638 00:35:59,440 --> 00:36:01,439 Jessica Vosk: You know, I mean, And that's also kind of it's 639 00:36:01,480 --> 00:36:04,320 Jessica Vosk: just helpful. My feet have always very been firmly planted 640 00:36:04,360 --> 00:36:10,200 Jessica Vosk: on the ground because I had these massive setbacks of like, okay, 641 00:36:10,239 --> 00:36:12,720 Jessica Vosk: I worked in finance, and then I got laid off, 642 00:36:13,400 --> 00:36:15,160 Jessica Vosk: and then I was able to babysit everybody, and then 643 00:36:15,160 --> 00:36:18,799 Jessica Vosk: I had a couple of cool little moments of big 644 00:36:18,840 --> 00:36:20,360 Jessica Vosk: things happened to me that I thought were going to 645 00:36:20,400 --> 00:36:24,600 Jessica Vosk: be huge. Then everything came crashing down and I had 646 00:36:24,640 --> 00:36:28,000 Jessica Vosk: to build everything back up again. So it gives you 647 00:36:28,080 --> 00:36:32,400 Jessica Vosk: a lot of humbling energy because I don't walk around 648 00:36:32,719 --> 00:36:36,240 Jessica Vosk: like I'm owed any of this. I don't walk around 649 00:36:36,480 --> 00:36:40,400 Jessica Vosk: with the attitude of a diva or I'm so good 650 00:36:41,200 --> 00:36:45,440 Jessica Vosk: or you owe me. I know exactly what it's like 651 00:36:45,960 --> 00:36:51,600 Jessica Vosk: to lose and to fall and to have to get 652 00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:52,240 Jessica Vosk: back up again. 653 00:36:53,160 --> 00:36:56,239 Emily Tisch Sussman: Once you got the role, did it meet your expectations 654 00:36:56,239 --> 00:36:57,680 Emily Tisch Sussman: of what it would be like to do it for 655 00:36:57,719 --> 00:36:58,520 Emily Tisch Sussman: a year on Broadway? 656 00:36:58,800 --> 00:37:02,160 Jessica Vosk: Oh god no. I mean the show itself is phenomenal, 657 00:37:02,680 --> 00:37:06,640 Jessica Vosk: but it's a really hard it's a hard track. I mean, 658 00:37:06,960 --> 00:37:10,160 Jessica Vosk: you're you're leading a Broadway company. There's a lot of expectation. 659 00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:12,880 Jessica Vosk: You know. I had done the fifteenth anniversary, so that 660 00:37:12,960 --> 00:37:16,240 Jessica Vosk: was a whole other, you know, huge amount of press 661 00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:20,239 Jessica Vosk: added to an already big show, and that's when the 662 00:37:20,280 --> 00:37:23,440 Jessica Vosk: talks of the movie had started happening. And that's you know, 663 00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:26,279 Jessica Vosk: Mark Platt, who is the producer of the film. He's 664 00:37:26,280 --> 00:37:28,799 Jessica Vosk: mostly based in la with with NBC Universal, but he 665 00:37:28,880 --> 00:37:31,440 Jessica Vosk: came by and we had a lovely chat and he 666 00:37:31,640 --> 00:37:34,880 Jessica Vosk: was very very kind with you know, the energy that 667 00:37:34,920 --> 00:37:36,960 Jessica Vosk: I had brought into the show for the fifteenth anniversary. 668 00:37:37,040 --> 00:37:39,799 Jessica Vosk: So there were a lot of amazing parts of that 669 00:37:40,000 --> 00:37:43,359 Jessica Vosk: really put me on the map. So there's there's this 670 00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:45,839 Jessica Vosk: double edged sort of how hard it is and how 671 00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:48,799 Jessica Vosk: much you learn about your strength, especially as a woman, 672 00:37:49,400 --> 00:37:51,880 Jessica Vosk: because we just are treated differently. I don't care if 673 00:37:51,920 --> 00:37:56,080 Jessica Vosk: anybody argues with me. It's just a fact. So there's 674 00:37:56,480 --> 00:37:58,919 Jessica Vosk: there's that, and then there's this beauty of being able 675 00:37:58,960 --> 00:38:02,520 Jessica Vosk: to play this this role that so many people respond to. 676 00:38:03,200 --> 00:38:05,080 Emily Tisch Sussman: Look, I think both things can be true. Like you 677 00:38:05,080 --> 00:38:08,399 Emily Tisch Sussman: can go through something that is incredibly difficult and it's 678 00:38:08,440 --> 00:38:11,239 Emily Tisch Sussman: worth it. Yes, Yes, I don't have to say I 679 00:38:11,280 --> 00:38:13,200 Emily Tisch Sussman: regret it. You know the place that it got you 680 00:38:13,320 --> 00:38:15,960 Emily Tisch Sussman: it was worth it, Yes, it really was. And I 681 00:38:16,000 --> 00:38:18,399 Emily Tisch Sussman: don't There's there are a few things that I'll ever say, 682 00:38:18,440 --> 00:38:20,799 Emily Tisch Sussman: like I really regret I don't even regret going to read. 683 00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:23,600 Emily Tisch Sussman: I don't regret drinking, none of that. There's really few 684 00:38:23,600 --> 00:38:26,720 Emily Tisch Sussman: things I will say I regret. I never will regret Wicked. 685 00:38:26,960 --> 00:38:29,520 Jessica Vosk: Wicked was one of the best things that's ever happened 686 00:38:29,560 --> 00:38:32,640 Jessica Vosk: to me and my career, But because of how difficult 687 00:38:32,640 --> 00:38:35,680 Jessica Vosk: it was, it taught me a ton about self love 688 00:38:35,719 --> 00:38:36,400 Jessica Vosk: and resilience. 689 00:38:37,120 --> 00:38:39,560 Emily Tisch Sussman: What is something that at the time you saw as 690 00:38:39,560 --> 00:38:43,360 Emily Tisch Sussman: a negative or low point, but now in hindsight you 691 00:38:43,440 --> 00:38:45,480 Emily Tisch Sussman: really see it as a positive that put you on 692 00:38:45,520 --> 00:38:45,960 Emily Tisch Sussman: this path. 693 00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:52,719 Jessica Vosk: The negative low point was probably rehab. Yeah, outside of 694 00:38:52,800 --> 00:38:55,239 Jessica Vosk: leaving finance, thinking I made the worst decision in the 695 00:38:55,280 --> 00:38:59,360 Jessica Vosk: world auditioning for a couple months, nobody calling, thinking that 696 00:38:59,360 --> 00:39:03,719 Jessica Vosk: I'd become fams and not becoming famous. I mean, I 697 00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:10,600 Jessica Vosk: had to learn that expectation is really the enemy of 698 00:39:11,800 --> 00:39:16,239 Jessica Vosk: success in my opinion. That's just my opinion. The more 699 00:39:16,280 --> 00:39:20,560 Jessica Vosk: I expect, the less I get. You can only expect 700 00:39:20,560 --> 00:39:22,600 Jessica Vosk: things from yourself. You can't expect it from anybody else 701 00:39:22,640 --> 00:39:26,680 Jessica Vosk: or anything else. So I can expect perfection from myself. 702 00:39:26,719 --> 00:39:29,160 Jessica Vosk: I'll never deliver on perfection. I can deliver on you know, 703 00:39:29,239 --> 00:39:32,359 Jessica Vosk: practice and progress. I can't expect it from anybody else. 704 00:39:32,600 --> 00:39:34,719 Jessica Vosk: I can't expect to be called with the job. I 705 00:39:34,719 --> 00:39:37,960 Jessica Vosk: can expect to ready myself for the job. But any 706 00:39:38,000 --> 00:39:40,399 Jessica Vosk: of these other things that I thought were going to happen, right, 707 00:39:40,600 --> 00:39:42,640 Jessica Vosk: I did this thing, people heard me saying, I expect 708 00:39:42,719 --> 00:39:45,960 Jessica Vosk: to be a leading lady. Doesn't work that way. So 709 00:39:46,480 --> 00:39:49,799 Jessica Vosk: that's the stuff that I learned in that I'm the 710 00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:53,320 Jessica Vosk: only one that can actually do anything about my life 711 00:39:53,719 --> 00:39:56,640 Jessica Vosk: without expecting anybody else to follow suit. 712 00:39:57,360 --> 00:39:58,560 Emily Tisch Sussman: Do you think you'll pivot again? 713 00:39:58,760 --> 00:40:01,840 Jessica Vosk: Oh? Yeah, girl, I love a pivot. I love a pivot. 714 00:40:01,880 --> 00:40:03,719 Jessica Vosk: I don't know what it'll be, but just keeping the 715 00:40:03,760 --> 00:40:07,440 Jessica Vosk: options open. Yeah, I mean that's I think my happy 716 00:40:07,480 --> 00:40:10,760 Jessica Vosk: place is. You know, my happy place is challenge. I'm 717 00:40:11,040 --> 00:40:14,359 Jessica Vosk: going into Hell's Kitchen. It's an Alicia Keyes musical. I'm 718 00:40:14,400 --> 00:40:18,600 Jessica Vosk: known for Broadway. This is pop and I'm massively challenged 719 00:40:18,760 --> 00:40:23,600 Jessica Vosk: every day at this show and question myself every day 720 00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:28,160 Jessica Vosk: and have to remind myself that I asked for these challenges, 721 00:40:28,680 --> 00:40:32,759 Jessica Vosk: and so who knows what the next challenge will be, 722 00:40:32,840 --> 00:40:36,040 Jessica Vosk: But I focused on this one right now because even 723 00:40:36,080 --> 00:40:40,120 Jessica Vosk: this is a tiny pivot from what Broadway is. So 724 00:40:40,160 --> 00:40:42,640 Jessica Vosk: what the next thing will be, I don't know, but 725 00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:45,040 Jessica Vosk: but I will. As I like to say, I do 726 00:40:45,160 --> 00:40:46,719 Jessica Vosk: not like to half asked. I like to use my 727 00:40:46,760 --> 00:40:47,480 Jessica Vosk: whole ass. 728 00:40:47,719 --> 00:40:50,040 Emily Tisch Sussman: Okay, wait, before I let you go, I have to 729 00:40:50,040 --> 00:40:51,920 Emily Tisch Sussman: ask your thoughts on the Wicked movie because I know 730 00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:53,520 Emily Tisch Sussman: you and Arianna are friends. 731 00:40:53,760 --> 00:40:56,120 Jessica Vosk: I mean, Ariana Grande and I became quite close when 732 00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:58,400 Jessica Vosk: I did fifteenth Anniversary of Broadway because we did an 733 00:40:58,480 --> 00:41:02,360 Jessica Vosk: NBC special together, so we stayed in touch, and she 734 00:41:02,480 --> 00:41:04,960 Jessica Vosk: called me when she booked it, and I was so 735 00:41:05,120 --> 00:41:06,759 Jessica Vosk: thrilled for her because we had been talking about it 736 00:41:06,760 --> 00:41:08,800 Jessica Vosk: for so many months. And then I flew to London 737 00:41:09,280 --> 00:41:11,040 Jessica Vosk: and we had like a nice little dinner together and 738 00:41:11,080 --> 00:41:14,200 Jessica Vosk: chatted about the experience when she was filming, and I 739 00:41:14,239 --> 00:41:16,680 Jessica Vosk: remember at the time she was so focused on getting 740 00:41:16,719 --> 00:41:21,120 Jessica Vosk: it right and paying a really beautiful tribute to Kristin 741 00:41:21,200 --> 00:41:25,000 Jessica Vosk: Chenow with an homage to the show itself. And I 742 00:41:25,040 --> 00:41:26,680 Jessica Vosk: think she did all of those things. I think they 743 00:41:26,680 --> 00:41:30,399 Jessica Vosk: both did. I think again, Mark Platt is a genius 744 00:41:30,719 --> 00:41:34,520 Jessica Vosk: and really assembled a team of avengers together to put 745 00:41:34,680 --> 00:41:38,080 Jessica Vosk: the best film version of this show out. And I'm 746 00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:42,799 Jessica Vosk: very proud of Ariana, which she knows, and her capability 747 00:41:42,840 --> 00:41:44,920 Jessica Vosk: to sort of step out of her comfort zone of 748 00:41:45,520 --> 00:41:48,000 Jessica Vosk: I'm a pop singer, I go on tour, YadA yadeah, 749 00:41:48,000 --> 00:41:49,880 Jessica Vosk: and to go back to her roots of but I 750 00:41:49,880 --> 00:41:51,920 Jessica Vosk: can also do this other thing. And I think she 751 00:41:52,000 --> 00:41:54,560 Jessica Vosk: knocked it out of the park. I loved it. I 752 00:41:54,560 --> 00:41:56,080 Jessica Vosk: had a great time at the screening. 753 00:41:56,120 --> 00:41:59,759 Emily Tisch Sussman: I was at well. Jessica, thank you so much for 754 00:42:00,000 --> 00:42:02,880 Emily Tisch Sussman: coming on. Thanks guys, so great to have you on. 755 00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:04,759 Jessica Vosk: I'm so happy that we did this. Thank you so 756 00:42:04,840 --> 00:42:07,560 Jessica Vosk: much for making it happen. Oh my god, I'm so happy. 757 00:42:09,239 --> 00:42:12,520 Emily Tisch Sussman: Jessica is still gracing us with her performance in Hell's Kitchen. 758 00:42:12,600 --> 00:42:14,680 Emily Tisch Sussman: So if you're in New York, be sure to grab 759 00:42:14,719 --> 00:42:19,640 Emily Tisch Sussman: tickets Plus, Jessica is hosting the Tony Awards Red Carpet 760 00:42:19,640 --> 00:42:22,239 Emily Tisch Sussman: this Sunday. Tune into New York One to see her, 761 00:42:22,800 --> 00:42:25,840 Emily Tisch Sussman: and finally, be sure to following her on Instagram at 762 00:42:26,000 --> 00:42:31,560 Emily Tisch Sussman: Jessica Voss for more. Thanks for listening. Thanks for listening 763 00:42:31,600 --> 00:42:35,160 Emily Tisch Sussman: to this episode of she Pivots. I hope you enjoyed it, 764 00:42:35,160 --> 00:42:37,560 Emily Tisch Sussman: and if you did, leave us a rating and tell 765 00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:40,880 Emily Tisch Sussman: your friends about us. To learn more about our guests, 766 00:42:41,160 --> 00:42:44,920 Emily Tisch Sussman: follow us on Instagram at she pivots the Podcast, or 767 00:42:45,000 --> 00:42:47,719 Emily Tisch Sussman: sign up for our newsletter, where you can get exclusive 768 00:42:47,800 --> 00:42:51,240 Emily Tisch Sussman: behind the scenes content on our website at she pivots 769 00:42:51,239 --> 00:42:57,799 Emily Tisch Sussman: thepodcast dot com. Special thanks to the she pivots team, 770 00:42:57,920 --> 00:43:03,200 Emily Tisch Sussman: Executive producer Emily At, Associate producer and social media connoisseur 771 00:43:03,280 --> 00:43:08,480 Emily Tisch Sussman: Hannah Cousins, Research director Christine Dickinson, Events and Logistics coordinator 772 00:43:08,480 --> 00:43:12,120 Emily Tisch Sussman: Madeleine Sonoviak, and audio editor and mixer Nina Pollock. 773 00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:14,520 Speaker 3: I endorse t pivos