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Speaker 1: I'm still waiting for that to come. I have hope, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that somebody will love me past Gina.

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Speaker 2: So I'm open. You feel like that got in the way,

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Speaker 2: Gina gotten away.

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Speaker 1: I don't think Gina itself gotten away their perception of you,

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Speaker 1: or I think my perception about self may have gotten

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Speaker 1: in the way.

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Speaker 3: Thanks for watching, guys. Today's episode is brought to you

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Speaker 3: by boost Mobile. For over forty years, Today's Guest has

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Speaker 3: been a true multi hyphen in film television, from early

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Speaker 3: roles in Little Shapaharas and Spike Lee School Days to

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Speaker 3: her iconic run as Gina and Martin, one of the

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Speaker 3: highest rated sitcoms of the whole nineteen nineties. Her career

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Speaker 3: and her characters are still quoted, clipped, and trending decades later.

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Speaker 2: She now leads in this new movie Be Happy, a

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Speaker 2: Mary J. Blige production on Lifetime. She's back to stand

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Speaker 2: up comedy. Yes, she's a legend and the balls. Welcome

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Speaker 2: to you.

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Speaker 1: She campbell, the eye around, excited to be here. Boom.

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Speaker 1: I just love you. I love you too.

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Speaker 2: I said to see you when you walked in. I

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Speaker 2: was like, if you can't have a good time with you,

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Speaker 2: she can't for you are the problems with you. You

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Speaker 2: are the problem because every time I have ever been

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Speaker 2: in your presence, we have good time and the energy

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Speaker 2: your energy is never it's always good.

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Speaker 1: Thank you. I'll tell my mama you said so she

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Speaker 1: did good?

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Speaker 2: Is your energy always good? Or is just when I.

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Speaker 1: Knows he No? No, I only show that part to

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Speaker 1: the closest people to me. But like most part are

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Speaker 1: like a dark side, you know, not really a dark side.

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Speaker 1: But I wear a mask so much. I've been trained

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Speaker 1: to wear a mask so much. And when I say mask,

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Speaker 1: I'm talking about if you think of the drama and

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Speaker 1: comedy mask, I'm always wearing the smile because you know,

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Speaker 1: when I leave my house, if I leave my gate,

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Speaker 1: I'm at work, like people are gonna take pictures, want

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Speaker 1: to talk to me. So as soon as I leave

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Speaker 1: out my house, I'm at work. So I'm always here.

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Speaker 1: And it's just really interesting that nowadays it's a little

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Speaker 1: harder for me to wear the mask. It was a

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Speaker 1: good friend named aj Johnson who I did house party

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Speaker 1: with a jant. She was one of the people who

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Speaker 1: told me to unmask, take my mask off because I'm

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Speaker 1: always I was always like this and I'm just learning.

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Speaker 2: Is like a life coach.

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Speaker 1: She is. She's an actress and a life coach. She

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Speaker 1: actually went to school to spellman. She I think she

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Speaker 1: made it. She willed to be a medical doctor, but

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Speaker 1: you know made that turn. Anyway, He's the one that

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Speaker 1: takes the mask. I was the first person who the

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Speaker 1: first person who ever said that it was twenty sixteen Easter. No. No.

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Speaker 1: I was begging her because she was life coaching a

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Speaker 1: bunch of people that day and it was an Easter

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Speaker 1: party that I was having at my house, and I

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Speaker 1: was like, I'm next. Because she would play this game

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Speaker 1: Salt Pepper Mom or Dad, you know, and in between

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Speaker 1: she would read you for filth, right, But I was like,

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Speaker 1: I'm next, I'm next, and she was like, ah, So

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Speaker 1: then she told me that you She was like, take

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Speaker 1: the mask off. And it was crazy because it literally

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Speaker 1: figuratively felt like everything just shattered onto the ground. And

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Speaker 1: I saw all of these people that was happened to

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Speaker 1: be in my house that day, a lot of them

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Speaker 1: I didn't even know. And I was like, you know,

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Speaker 1: with the Wizard of Oz when they turned into color,

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Speaker 1: when the black and white turs, That's what it was. Like,

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Speaker 1: I opened my eyes and I was like, oh, everybody's

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Speaker 1: not nice, because I'm a type of person that believes

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Speaker 1: in a good man first, always had been. But what

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Speaker 1: that does is it doesn't leave room for discernment. And

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Speaker 1: so at that moment my eyes opened, I was awake

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Speaker 1: and I couldn't put the mask back on. It was

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Speaker 1: a little harder to do, even if I'm doing it

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Speaker 1: for the betterment of everybody else.

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Speaker 2: To make she said, was take off the mask. She said, well,

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Speaker 2: what did that mean to you? Like, what did you

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Speaker 2: hear when she said that, I wake up? You don't

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Speaker 2: have to be on for everybody. You have to put

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Speaker 2: yourself first. And that's something that I was not used

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Speaker 2: to doing. I always put everybody else since I was

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Speaker 2: a little kid. You had said earlier in the intro

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Speaker 2: that I've been in this business for forty years. I've

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Speaker 2: actually been in this business for fifty years.

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Speaker 1: I started when I was three, wow, fifty something years

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Speaker 1: fifty four years and I started when I was three,

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Speaker 1: And since i was three years old, well, since I

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Speaker 1: was five years old, I've been paying bills. I've been

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Speaker 1: taking care of my family. I knew that I had

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Speaker 1: this gift that God had given me. I also was

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Speaker 1: very aware and conscious as a child of how incredibly

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Speaker 1: poor we really were. I mean, we was eating mayonnaise

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Speaker 1: sandwiches for breakfast, lunch, and dinner sometimes. Right. I grew

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Speaker 1: up in North New Jersey.

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Speaker 2: In the projects, not the Newark now like.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, no, not because Noark is flying right now, but

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Speaker 1: Nork back in the day. But I was really very

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Speaker 1: conscious and I wanted to help my family, and so

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Speaker 1: this became how I could help them best with along

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Speaker 1: with you know, singing and acting and whatever I was

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Speaker 1: doing to help get us out of our circumstances. So

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Speaker 1: it meant that I couldn't do I couldn't wear this

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Speaker 1: mask anymore. I had to be true to myself. If

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Speaker 1: I'm sad, be sad, If I'm angry, be angry, I

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Speaker 1: can still be kind. But I had to take it off.

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Speaker 2: And this was at a big age, right, you said,

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Speaker 2: this is like ten.

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Speaker 1: Years in twenty sixteen is when it happened.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so ten years ago.

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Speaker 1: Well, at first I got depressed because I didn't know

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Speaker 1: how I was going to take the mask off. How

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Speaker 1: am I going to do that with so many people

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Speaker 1: are counting on me to see this girl, and it's

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Speaker 1: interesting because that's kind of what this movie is about.

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Speaker 1: And I was mad because I was like, who is

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Speaker 1: this Cameron J. Ross writer all up in my business? Right?

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Speaker 2: Who is this.

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Speaker 1: Right right right? And it really is about you know,

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Speaker 1: when you get to a certain age, a grown ass woman,

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Speaker 1: you start to realize that what you may have missed

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Speaker 1: because you sacrifice so much for others. And that's where

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Speaker 1: I was, and that's where this character is too nice

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Speaker 1: transition teacher's I didn't know I did that, y'all, but

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Speaker 1: it really is true. And that's why I wanted to

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Speaker 1: do this film because it was really touching something right

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Speaker 1: here and here in my soul.

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Speaker 2: I love the trailer. I do want to talk the

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Speaker 2: film because I have a lot of questions about that

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Speaker 2: and also marries my sister I love, and it looked

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Speaker 2: so delicious and fun. You can't wait to see it.

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Speaker 2: But I do want to stay in that moment for

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Speaker 2: a second because she tells you take off the mask

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Speaker 2: and you look around and you see the cracks and

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Speaker 2: everybody because before what you was looking at everybody with

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Speaker 2: rose colored glasses.

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Speaker 1: I was.

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Speaker 2: That must have been very tricky in relationships.

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Speaker 1: I was depressing when I first realized what I had

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Speaker 1: been kind of doing to myself.

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Speaker 2: But what does that mean, like in real life? Like

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Speaker 2: what does that look like? So you have a friend

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Speaker 2: or a partner, and.

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Speaker 1: So I'm everything to everybody, including especially victims, so I

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Speaker 1: would take them on, I would help them. But I

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Speaker 1: was really everything that every I was the cook, I

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Speaker 1: was the chauffeur, I was the butcher, the baker, the

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Speaker 1: candlestick maker. I was everything to every one, and I wasn't.

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Speaker 1: My well was dry, and I had nothing else to

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Speaker 1: give even though I was running on empty, I was

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Speaker 1: running on fumes and I and and you got to

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Speaker 1: combine that with the fact that I have a child

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Speaker 1: on the spectrum. So I'm running around here whether I'm

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Speaker 1: you know, at work, trying to be there for my

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Speaker 1: you know, my my coworkers. Then I come home trying

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Speaker 1: to be the best wife. And then there's on top

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Speaker 1: of that, I got to take my kid to his

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Speaker 1: different therapies. I have to negotiate with these people. Sometimes

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Speaker 1: you don't get therapists right away. You have to, you know,

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Speaker 1: deal with the meltdowns of autism. You have to deal

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Speaker 1: with all of these things. And I was running around

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Speaker 1: being again being everything for everybody but me and the.

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Speaker 2: Girl. I feel you.

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Speaker 1: So it what it looked like after she told me

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Speaker 1: to take the mask off and get back to that

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Speaker 1: was depression because I didn't think that I could do it.

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Speaker 1: I didn't think I could put myself first, and so

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Speaker 1: I just started sleeping a lot. I didn't know that's

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Speaker 1: what depressure was, but I just couldn't stay awake, like

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Speaker 1: three o'clock, three o'clock in the afternoon. It didn't matter,

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Speaker 1: I would ask.

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Speaker 3: I hear that a lot when people talk about depression,

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Speaker 3: that it shows up that way, just.

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Speaker 1: That when I didn't in bed, yeah, like anywhere at

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Speaker 1: a restaurant.

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Speaker 2: And you couldn't even know and you didn't know why.

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Speaker 2: I didn't know why.

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Speaker 1: And then things changed and I started to accept it

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Speaker 1: that I couldn't operate like this no more.

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Speaker 4: So.

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Speaker 2: That is a major ass live shift.

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Speaker 1: It is.

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Speaker 2: I hope somebody watching that feels that deeply, because it's

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Speaker 2: not a small thing you're talking about, right, It's like

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Speaker 2: a major thing. And I think a lot of.

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Speaker 1: Women of women will understand that particular always give to

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Speaker 1: everybody but ourselves. We're always and you know, there's something

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Speaker 1: lovely about that and I and it's beautiful.

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Speaker 2: It is beautiful as long. But I think the piece

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Speaker 2: that women miss is that you can be a giver,

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Speaker 2: You could be empathetic, you could see people through ros

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Speaker 2: you could see the best in people even when they

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Speaker 2: don't see it themselves. But if you don't have boundaries, girl,

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Speaker 2: if you don't have boundaries, if you don't have boundaries,

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Speaker 2: and you don't cherish yourself, Like, if you're that good

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Speaker 2: of a human, you better cherish the fuck out of yourself.

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Speaker 1: That part. It was my kids that taught me boundaries.

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Speaker 2: Believe I bet my kids taught me boundaries.

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Speaker 1: My kids because okay, I grew up a baby boomer

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Speaker 1: raised me right, so you know when you're raised by

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Speaker 1: baby boomers. Blood is thicker than water. Family first, all

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Speaker 1: of those things. Not the blood of the covenant is

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Speaker 1: thicker than the water of the womb, that's the real quote.

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Speaker 1: But we were brought up blood is thicker than water.

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Speaker 1: And so my kids, both of them had a problem

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Speaker 1: with a family member and I was like, oh, you guys,

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Speaker 1: you gotta fix said they're family, you got to fix it.

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Speaker 1: And they're like, yeah, you throw on us in the trauma.

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Speaker 1: We don't want to do that. So here's what we're

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Speaker 1: going to do. Like they were like, Mom, just kind

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Speaker 1: of stay out of it. We'll fix it on our

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Speaker 1: own time, if we decide to fix it at all.

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Speaker 1: And I realized I really am pushing them in the drama.

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Speaker 1: That's not cool. And so I've learned to just step

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Speaker 1: back and adjust for myself even when my kids taught

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Speaker 1: me that, because that's all I know.

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Speaker 2: Man, that's so good tea shirt in the fact that

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Speaker 2: your kids, how old were they.

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Speaker 1: When they did? I believe one was twenty so and

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Speaker 1: the other he's eight years were grown. They were grown,

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Speaker 1: he's eight years alter. They were old enough to know

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Speaker 1: that you got to stop, and they understood who I

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Speaker 1: am as a person.

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Speaker 2: So you've had a pretty signal can shift in your

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Speaker 2: life in the past ten years.

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Speaker 1: You really have good for you. It is the most

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Speaker 1: amazing time. I really you have to really joy is

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Speaker 1: a verb. That's what my therapist said, and you gotta

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Speaker 1: work on joy. You gotta make a decision to work

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Speaker 1: on joy. And that's where I am in my life

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Speaker 1: right now. You know, I'm working. I'm working towards it

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Speaker 1: every single day, and that's what makes me happy. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I think sometimes we think if we don't put ourselves first,

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Speaker 2: if we don't put other people first, like we're not

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Speaker 2: a good person. That part like, you could do both.

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Speaker 1: Actually you actually could. You could be an amazing It

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Speaker 1: doesn't your selfish. It means yourself full.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and that's okay. Yeah, it's actually smarter, it's smart.

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Speaker 2: It's a better way to live.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely.

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Speaker 2: dot com in the category of like showing up for

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Speaker 2: people you have come up multiple times on this podcast.

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Speaker 2: First of all, we just had Gabrielle Union on who

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Speaker 2: told us that you paid for her therapy as a

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Speaker 2: young woman in this business. I did. And I was like, well,

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Speaker 2: why did she do that? And she said, I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I think she just knew I needed it.

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Speaker 1: Could Well, let me just say this, It was I

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Speaker 1: saw the potential and gap. She was working her butt off,

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Speaker 1: but I knew she was going to be even bigger

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Speaker 1: than what we were witnessing at that moment, and so

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Speaker 1: I wanted her to have support because this business can

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Speaker 1: be so crazy, and so.

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Speaker 2: You didn't even know the history of what she had

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Speaker 2: been through.

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Speaker 1: No, she looked fine to me. It wasn't like I

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Speaker 1: saw something wrong. It's just that I wanted her to

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Speaker 1: be able to navigate this business. You're not going to

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Speaker 1: be unscathed, but at least you could at have some

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Speaker 1: type of support. And so I paid for like ten sessions,

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Speaker 1: ten of her first sessions. I really I said, I

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Speaker 1: really want you to see this therapist and you mean

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Speaker 1: a lot. You know you're going to be big, And what.

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Speaker 2: Did you see in her? Why did you know that?

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Speaker 1: I could tell? First of all, if I'm walking down

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Speaker 1: the street, I could tell an artist from a mile away. Really, yeah,

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Speaker 1: how it's a feeling. It's a feeling I can I

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Speaker 1: can see an artist right away, and then I can

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Speaker 1: also you can see an IT factor. Anybody can see

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Speaker 1: an IT factor. And she had it. She had that

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Speaker 1: IT factor, that X factor, and I knew she was

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Speaker 1: going to be huge. I think it's God. God tells

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Speaker 1: me who's going to be like that?

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Speaker 2: And you wanted to help her.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and I you know, I feel like I could

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Speaker 1: see that. I just think that she needed to be

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Speaker 1: supported and I like to support my sisters.

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Speaker 2: I know. And then we had Tasha Smith on Really.

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Speaker 2: Tasha Smith said you were the one of the first

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Speaker 2: people that made her believe that she could do this

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Speaker 2: because you were one of the first examples. And I

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Speaker 2: guess she met you in Campa, New Jersey, Yeah, when

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Speaker 2: she her and her sister were fifteen. Yeah, and so

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Speaker 2: she really credits you for making her feel like this

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Speaker 2: career would be possible.

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Speaker 1: Well, you know a lot of times when I see people,

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Speaker 1: I'll say things like, you know you're not supposed to

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Speaker 1: be here, right, you know that you are going to

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Speaker 1: be in a different place. You know, you're not supposed

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Speaker 1: to stay where you are. You could feel it in

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Speaker 1: your soul. I see it. So I need for you

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Speaker 1: to see it, and I need for you to do

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Speaker 1: something about it. I do that with a lot of people.

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Speaker 2: You just see it and you all got to who

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Speaker 2: did that for you?

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Speaker 1: I think it was like a family member or something,

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Speaker 1: maybe because I grew up. Okay, So my mom and

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Speaker 1: her sisters were gospel singers called the Shockley Singers, and

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Speaker 1: they used to sing background for Mehelia Jackson whoo yeah.

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Speaker 1: And then my dad was in a group and that's

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Speaker 1: how they met. So music and artistry has always been

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Speaker 1: in around me, and so I could tell who's who.

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Speaker 1: But it's more of a spiritual thing. It's not an

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Speaker 1: artist thing like ooh, she could probably sing like she

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Speaker 1: looked like she got the breast to like the big

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Speaker 1: old breast that like really blow. No, it's not the chest.

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Speaker 1: It's a spiritual thing. So I can kind of tell

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Speaker 1: when I see him.

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Speaker 2: So when did comedy come into it? When did you think?

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Speaker 1: So I couldn't get arrested doing comedy. I started out

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Speaker 1: as a dreamt. I couldn't. I started out as a

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Speaker 1: drama actress, doing a lot of theater, and if you

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Speaker 1: wanted somebody to cry on, cute teacher was your girl.

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Speaker 1: So I would always get hired for that kind of stuff.

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Speaker 2: And as a matter of fact, you were made to

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Speaker 2: do this lifetime movie that you're right the way I said.

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Speaker 1: And I'm gonna get to that too. But when I

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Speaker 1: was younger, I remember about eighteen years old, I auditioned

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Speaker 1: for a sitcom and so the casside director goes, you

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Speaker 1: need sitcom classes and I was like, oh, okay, where

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Speaker 1: do you get those? She was like, there aren't any, right,

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Speaker 1: So I was like, so I had to figure out

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Speaker 1: what comedy was. So I would just go to the

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Speaker 1: comedy store by myself, with the comedy act theater, the

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Speaker 1: laugh Factory, and I would just sit in the back

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Speaker 1: with the comedians to try to figure out what is

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Speaker 1: comedy because they were giving all the men these deals

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Speaker 1: in the nineties. Everybody had a deal. Robert Townsend, Sindbad Martin,

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Speaker 1: everybody right. So I was like, I got to jump

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Speaker 1: on somebody show, I got to work. So I sit

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Speaker 1: in the back and the ones that were really good

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Speaker 1: were the ones who told their real life story and

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh, there's a thin line between drama

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Speaker 1: and comedy. All I gotta do is support and ground it,

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Speaker 1: and I can I can do it. So that's how

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Speaker 1: I started out doing comedy.

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Speaker 2: Wow. And then did you get up there?

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Speaker 1: Like No, I was too afraid to go up because

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Speaker 1: back then that the climate of the stand ups. And

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Speaker 1: I'm saying this is from people that were you know,

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Speaker 1: in the nineties. They weren't collaborative or it was very competitive.

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Speaker 2: It was brutal.

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Speaker 1: It was brutal.

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Speaker 2: It was brutal.

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Speaker 1: They were brutal to one another. So I never did it.

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Speaker 1: But I worked with so many stand up comedians in

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Speaker 1: scripted in the scripted world that they kept telling me

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Speaker 1: you got it, you really are good at telling stories,

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Speaker 1: like you gotta get up there, you gotta try it.

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Speaker 1: You're really funny, You're really funny. But I would never

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Speaker 1: And it just so happened our friend, our good our

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Speaker 1: good friend d Nice, Derek d Nice had a residency

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Speaker 1: at the Kennedy Center. That's what I call it.

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Speaker 2: That was like a couple of years ago. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: only two years ago, two years ago.

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Speaker 1: Right, And he had a residency. I happened to be

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Speaker 1: coming to support him. His host fell out and he

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Speaker 1: was like, can you bring people up? And I'm telling

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Speaker 1: you he had the best of the Creme de la creme.

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Speaker 1: He had Sherry Shepherd, Michael Jay, Chris Spencer, Zeynap, he

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Speaker 1: had great people, oh, Gino, yash great comedians, big comedians.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, sure, I can, I can host,

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Speaker 1: I can host bring them up. He was like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I do fifteen minutes before I was like, huh talking

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Speaker 1: to so he just assumed they know you know what

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Speaker 1: it was, Beck? You know Rebecca, Yes, yes, we love that.

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Speaker 1: By the way, we love it back. I love you back.

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Speaker 2: Wait, so did they just assume that you had done now?

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Speaker 1: No, they didn't. And they were like. She was like, oh, Chris, Chris,

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Speaker 1: Chris Spinster will help you. And I was like, Chris

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Speaker 1: ain't going help shit. He got add right, So Chris

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Speaker 1: ain't gonna do nothing right. So I called Chris and

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Speaker 1: Chris I just tell a story. I was like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: this wasn't so. But I also had taken classes with

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Speaker 1: Chris a long time ago. We took writing classes meet

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Speaker 1: him and Tashina, and so I know how he operates.

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Speaker 5: Right.

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Speaker 1: They were terrible in that class too. I was a

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Speaker 1: class victim. I was a victim, but no, he was

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Speaker 1: a class class. So anyway, I know how he operates.

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Speaker 1: So I said, I got fifteen minutes before I go

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Speaker 1: on to ask him questions. So I did that, and

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Speaker 1: he gave me, you know, really great advice. And I

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Speaker 1: went up there. But the time I got off, there

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Speaker 1: was an agent in the in the audience, and she

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Speaker 1: started representing me. And that was that I started going

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Speaker 1: on the road with Vaness Mitchell. You've been doing things

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Speaker 1: of comedy ever since. And the first time, mind you,

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Speaker 1: I ever went up there at the Kennedy Center, it

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Speaker 1: was four thousand people?

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Speaker 2: How many?

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Speaker 1: Four thousand?

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Speaker 2: Oh? And did you tell jokes? So you're telling JOJ

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Speaker 2: but you're also Tisha Campbell.

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Speaker 1: Well that's different though, this is a completely different genre.

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Speaker 1: It's the scariest thing I've ever done in my life

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Speaker 1: because you're telling your real life stories. You are trying

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Speaker 1: to get people to laugh at your pain. And but

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Speaker 1: it's it's so's it's addictive. And I get to not

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Speaker 1: have a screen between me and people anymore. They get

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Speaker 1: to know me for me, not a character of me.

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Speaker 2: Did you think for a second to not do it

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Speaker 2: out of fear.

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Speaker 1: Yes, I think about that every single time I go up.

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Speaker 2: Fear could stop you if you let it, if you let.

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Speaker 1: It, But I willn't Again. I'm at a certain age

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Speaker 1: where I'm like, I'm gonna try and do everything I've

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Speaker 1: ever wanted to do.

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Speaker 2: That's why I love this story. It's number one. It's

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Speaker 2: like this just happened two years ago. Yeah, it was

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Speaker 2: just you are you already have all your credits, your resume,

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Speaker 2: and you have you have done what you have done this,

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Speaker 2: You're gonna start something new that's terrifying and say, yes,

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna go do that.

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Speaker 1: Who now told me? Why are you getting into this

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Speaker 1: misogynistic business? I was like, there's something so beautiful about

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Speaker 1: this genre, this art form, and I've always respected it

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Speaker 1: and I wanted the people that I worked with to

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Speaker 1: know that I took it seriously. And then I'm really

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Speaker 1: doing the work. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: So love that. So how does it feel when you're

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Speaker 2: up there? Like when they laugh, engaging?

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Speaker 1: When it feels when it hits, it feels like I'm

436
00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:46,720
Speaker 1: taking their pain away for just a half hour.

437
00:22:47,480 --> 00:22:49,280
Speaker 2: Like what about when a joke doesn't hit?

438
00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:51,919
Speaker 1: When a joke doesn't hit you just keep it moving.

439
00:22:52,359 --> 00:22:55,480
Speaker 1: It actually motivates me to get up there even more.

440
00:22:56,320 --> 00:22:57,080
Speaker 2: To figure it out.

441
00:22:57,280 --> 00:23:02,000
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, it hurts, but it's but it's like, oh,

442
00:23:02,000 --> 00:23:02,879
Speaker 1: I got to get back up.

443
00:23:03,480 --> 00:23:04,800
Speaker 2: That's how I feel about golf. Tah.

444
00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:06,400
Speaker 1: Really like that.

445
00:23:06,480 --> 00:23:11,520
Speaker 2: I golf started golfing maybe three four years ago, and

446
00:23:11,560 --> 00:23:15,880
Speaker 2: I love it so much. I'm terrible. It's really hard, yeah,

447
00:23:16,200 --> 00:23:19,119
Speaker 2: because you get better and you get worse. I do

448
00:23:19,160 --> 00:23:20,960
Speaker 2: it in front of people. I go to these celebrity

449
00:23:20,960 --> 00:23:22,840
Speaker 2: tournaments and I play in front of people, and I'm like,

450
00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:25,520
Speaker 2: oh God, but I don't care. I like it anyway,

451
00:23:25,520 --> 00:23:27,680
Speaker 2: and I just do it. It's not the feeling, it's

452
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:30,120
Speaker 2: not the same thing, but the idea of finding new

453
00:23:30,160 --> 00:23:33,320
Speaker 2: things at whatever age you're at, whatever success level, whatever

454
00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:37,080
Speaker 2: marital state, stop like you always should be trying to

455
00:23:37,119 --> 00:23:41,600
Speaker 2: find things that I don't know, just new fresh, keep

456
00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:44,800
Speaker 2: you alive, keep exploring, finding the joy. Yeah. I want

457
00:23:44,800 --> 00:23:45,920
Speaker 2: to see you do stand.

458
00:23:45,760 --> 00:23:48,000
Speaker 1: Up so bad now. Oh I want you to come.

459
00:23:48,160 --> 00:23:49,159
Speaker 2: I totally want to come.

460
00:23:49,280 --> 00:23:51,080
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, when I'm in your area, I'll hit you up.

461
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:54,320
Speaker 2: So the movie I saw the trailer today. It looks

462
00:23:54,359 --> 00:23:57,800
Speaker 2: so good. I mean number one, because you just when

463
00:23:57,800 --> 00:24:01,919
Speaker 2: we see you on camera, it automatically is it elevates

464
00:24:02,119 --> 00:24:03,880
Speaker 2: the feeling like it's just like we know.

465
00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:06,080
Speaker 1: You're gonna get something out of it.

466
00:24:06,480 --> 00:24:08,520
Speaker 2: I know it's gonna feel good, it's gonna be funny,

467
00:24:08,640 --> 00:24:12,320
Speaker 2: Like I don't know, you just your presence just lends

468
00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:16,040
Speaker 2: something elevated to anything. I think this was an.

469
00:24:15,960 --> 00:24:20,480
Speaker 1: Interesting project to take on, and I'm really not sure.

470
00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:25,840
Speaker 1: I think it was a combination of a couple of things.

471
00:24:26,320 --> 00:24:30,840
Speaker 1: But it was Mary, of course. And then there was

472
00:24:31,240 --> 00:24:34,840
Speaker 1: Gabby Sidabe who directed the film, and I worked with

473
00:24:34,960 --> 00:24:40,800
Speaker 1: her before doing a pilot of hers, and she saw

474
00:24:40,880 --> 00:24:43,680
Speaker 1: my work where it was not just comedy. She knew

475
00:24:43,680 --> 00:24:48,080
Speaker 1: that I could ground a scene and that I was

476
00:24:48,720 --> 00:24:52,280
Speaker 1: still a drama that I that I can do drama

477
00:24:52,560 --> 00:24:57,280
Speaker 1: rather and so I knew that she was directing, and

478
00:24:57,560 --> 00:25:00,960
Speaker 1: I wanted to do well for her because.

479
00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:01,960
Speaker 2: You're such a girl's girl.

480
00:25:02,160 --> 00:25:06,000
Speaker 1: I think I am. Yeah, But she's a really good person.

481
00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:09,800
Speaker 1: But even on top of her being a great actress

482
00:25:09,800 --> 00:25:13,560
Speaker 1: and a good person, she's a fucking excellent director. I

483
00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:16,000
Speaker 1: will work with her again and again her She's very

484
00:25:16,080 --> 00:25:19,800
Speaker 1: clear about what she wants. Her storytelling is good. She

485
00:25:19,920 --> 00:25:24,240
Speaker 1: communicates very well, and I wanted to make her proud.

486
00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:28,320
Speaker 1: I put and she sent me a message I literally

487
00:25:28,359 --> 00:25:30,560
Speaker 1: required because she was like, you put your whole heart

488
00:25:30,600 --> 00:25:34,600
Speaker 1: into this. You put your whole heart into this, everything

489
00:25:34,680 --> 00:25:36,959
Speaker 1: that you may have been through, and I see it

490
00:25:37,080 --> 00:25:40,880
Speaker 1: on screen and I just appreciate it, she said. Even

491
00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:43,680
Speaker 1: Lifetime appreciates it. They really like the film. So I'm

492
00:25:43,720 --> 00:25:44,400
Speaker 1: happy about that.

493
00:25:44,480 --> 00:25:46,119
Speaker 2: I'm so excited. I can't wait. So I need to

494
00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:47,800
Speaker 2: see you in the film. Yeah, and I need to

495
00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:51,560
Speaker 2: see some standing. Yes, I need almost all the things.

496
00:25:51,800 --> 00:25:54,200
Speaker 3: What about like, so you must have learned so much

497
00:25:54,200 --> 00:25:56,200
Speaker 3: in the past couple of years of having this kind

498
00:25:56,240 --> 00:25:59,480
Speaker 3: of transition. So people we hear people say that, even

499
00:25:59,520 --> 00:26:01,680
Speaker 3: on this pod. For some reason, it comes up a

500
00:26:01,720 --> 00:26:03,960
Speaker 3: lot like I'm in my I don't care season, I'm

501
00:26:03,960 --> 00:26:07,199
Speaker 3: in my. We all say that, Yeah, but what is

502
00:26:07,240 --> 00:26:11,800
Speaker 3: the actual like execution of that look like like one

503
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:14,359
Speaker 3: of the things that you have to do to remind you,

504
00:26:14,440 --> 00:26:15,760
Speaker 3: Like for me, I will tell you, I have to

505
00:26:15,880 --> 00:26:22,399
Speaker 3: literally actually remind myself that what feels good for me

506
00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:24,560
Speaker 3: is is Okay, I don't have to.

507
00:26:24,400 --> 00:26:26,560
Speaker 2: Explain any bad about it. I don't have to, and

508
00:26:26,600 --> 00:26:28,159
Speaker 2: I have you. It's almost like a you have to

509
00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:31,679
Speaker 2: massage your muscle memory to get you thinking, to remember

510
00:26:31,720 --> 00:26:33,920
Speaker 2: who you are, to get you thinking a certain way.

511
00:26:33,960 --> 00:26:34,879
Speaker 2: It has to become a habit.

512
00:26:35,080 --> 00:26:39,120
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, So like it's okay for me, it's therapy.

513
00:26:41,280 --> 00:26:49,520
Speaker 1: I have been super committed to unpacking baggage and understanding

514
00:26:49,520 --> 00:26:55,680
Speaker 1: myself a little bit more where I am today, aligning

515
00:26:55,720 --> 00:27:00,680
Speaker 1: that nervous system. Man Like, I've been working so hard

516
00:27:00,760 --> 00:27:04,359
Speaker 1: in therapy and I can see the difference in myself

517
00:27:06,000 --> 00:27:08,600
Speaker 1: surrounding myself. The other thing is I surround myself with

518
00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:13,280
Speaker 1: a limited amount of people with whom I can trust.

519
00:27:16,240 --> 00:27:18,000
Speaker 1: And then I'm a writer. I write.

520
00:27:18,160 --> 00:27:21,000
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Speaker 2: What about being a mother? Yes, and you mentioned, you know,

545
00:28:15,280 --> 00:28:18,119
Speaker 2: having a child on the spectrum, on the spectrum, I

546
00:28:18,160 --> 00:28:22,480
Speaker 2: know you always want to be very careful.

547
00:28:21,840 --> 00:28:24,280
Speaker 1: Language the changes it changes.

548
00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:28,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, well enlighten us, like what are the wrong words?

549
00:28:28,480 --> 00:28:30,560
Speaker 1: What are the rights? What did you have to learn

550
00:28:30,600 --> 00:28:36,119
Speaker 1: about that they no longer use words like aspergers? Okay,

551
00:28:36,240 --> 00:28:40,360
Speaker 1: because that was a or when when you look at

552
00:28:40,360 --> 00:28:43,840
Speaker 1: the spectrum, there's no more low on the spectrum or

553
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:45,360
Speaker 1: higher up on the spectrum.

554
00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:46,000
Speaker 2: The spectrum.

555
00:28:46,000 --> 00:28:48,280
Speaker 1: You're on the spectrum and then there are levels now,

556
00:28:48,360 --> 00:28:51,880
Speaker 1: so there's level one, level two, and level three. Level

557
00:28:51,880 --> 00:28:57,960
Speaker 1: one is where it doesn't affect them living independently. Level

558
00:28:58,000 --> 00:28:59,800
Speaker 1: two is where they might need a little bit more

559
00:28:59,800 --> 00:29:03,400
Speaker 1: so port right. Level three is where they need a

560
00:29:03,440 --> 00:29:06,200
Speaker 1: whole bunch of support to function.

561
00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:09,200
Speaker 2: And your child was on what level?

562
00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:15,680
Speaker 1: I think he started out around He was nonverbal until

563
00:29:15,680 --> 00:29:19,760
Speaker 1: he was like eight, so I would say level two and.

564
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:24,400
Speaker 2: A half and now level two.

565
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:28,520
Speaker 1: He's actually one and a half. I think he's one

566
00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:31,440
Speaker 1: and a half because he can. One of my goals

567
00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:34,000
Speaker 1: was to get him as independent of me as possible.

568
00:29:34,200 --> 00:29:38,400
Speaker 1: So this boy is in college. He keeps two jobs

569
00:29:38,400 --> 00:29:40,120
Speaker 1: in his pocket because he don't ever want to ask

570
00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:45,600
Speaker 1: me for cash or anything. He is prides himself on

571
00:29:45,720 --> 00:29:49,480
Speaker 1: being the man of the house, prides itself on protecting me,

572
00:29:51,680 --> 00:29:54,760
Speaker 1: and he's just an amazing human being. So I would

573
00:29:54,800 --> 00:29:55,560
Speaker 1: say one and a half.

574
00:29:55,960 --> 00:29:58,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, wowah yeah.

575
00:29:59,240 --> 00:30:02,200
Speaker 1: When I think about my kids, it just makes me

576
00:30:02,240 --> 00:30:05,840
Speaker 1: smile so hard. They're incredible people, Like even my youngest.

577
00:30:05,840 --> 00:30:09,800
Speaker 1: My youngest, the teachers at the school always call me

578
00:30:09,840 --> 00:30:13,480
Speaker 1: about him and they're like, he's the kindest child I've

579
00:30:13,520 --> 00:30:16,240
Speaker 1: ever taught. I get emails like that all the time,

580
00:30:16,360 --> 00:30:20,080
Speaker 1: like I wish I had a dozen Ezekiels in my class.

581
00:30:20,200 --> 00:30:21,560
Speaker 2: So you did good as a mom.

582
00:30:21,760 --> 00:30:23,360
Speaker 1: I think we're doing good.

583
00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:27,280
Speaker 2: You did good, but I'm sure there were challenges in that. Yes,

584
00:30:27,360 --> 00:30:29,000
Speaker 2: of course you love your kid, and of course you

585
00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:30,400
Speaker 2: did great, but like.

586
00:30:30,360 --> 00:30:33,160
Speaker 1: In the beginning, it was very challenging. Yeah, it was

587
00:30:33,280 --> 00:30:33,840
Speaker 1: very challenging.

588
00:30:33,880 --> 00:30:36,640
Speaker 2: A lot of people not know about that, about being

589
00:30:36,680 --> 00:30:38,760
Speaker 2: a mom and the challenges.

590
00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:41,160
Speaker 1: I think what most people don't know is that when

591
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:43,160
Speaker 1: I got the diagnosis, I was on the set of

592
00:30:43,160 --> 00:30:44,040
Speaker 1: My Wife and Kids.

593
00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:44,720
Speaker 2: Wow.

594
00:30:45,360 --> 00:30:48,240
Speaker 1: And I pride myself on being the type of person

595
00:30:48,280 --> 00:30:53,880
Speaker 1: who doesn't bring their problems to work. And plus demon

596
00:30:54,840 --> 00:31:01,080
Speaker 1: created such a family oriented, loving atmosphere on that and

597
00:31:01,120 --> 00:31:04,040
Speaker 1: I felt like I owed it to him to make

598
00:31:04,080 --> 00:31:07,200
Speaker 1: sure that it stayed that way. So far be it

599
00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:11,760
Speaker 1: from me to bring my ish you make it heavy

600
00:31:11,960 --> 00:31:12,360
Speaker 1: to work?

601
00:31:12,760 --> 00:31:13,120
Speaker 2: Yeah?

602
00:31:13,880 --> 00:31:17,160
Speaker 1: So yeah, does he know that you did that that?

603
00:31:18,600 --> 00:31:20,360
Speaker 1: I think this is my first time talking about it

604
00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:26,360
Speaker 1: as but I adore him and his family so so much.

605
00:31:27,480 --> 00:31:31,440
Speaker 1: He even he even put a nursery in my dress

606
00:31:31,520 --> 00:31:34,360
Speaker 1: room so that I could bring my baby to work. Like.

607
00:31:34,440 --> 00:31:37,400
Speaker 1: He was always so supportive. When I first got the

608
00:31:37,520 --> 00:31:40,880
Speaker 1: job on Wife and Kids, he was like, Hey, I

609
00:31:40,880 --> 00:31:43,200
Speaker 1: think we're going to be here for a good five years.

610
00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:45,760
Speaker 1: It's time for you can get pregnant if you want to,

611
00:31:45,800 --> 00:31:48,760
Speaker 1: because we're gonna be here, and so hee't have to

612
00:31:48,760 --> 00:31:52,280
Speaker 1: tell me. Twice I got pregnant with Zen right away,

613
00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:54,040
Speaker 1: so and had him the second season.

614
00:31:54,400 --> 00:31:58,440
Speaker 2: Wow, And so you would never bring anything to say.

615
00:31:58,440 --> 00:32:01,160
Speaker 1: No, I still don't do that. It's how we were

616
00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:03,920
Speaker 1: trained in this business. I grew up in the theater.

617
00:32:04,320 --> 00:32:07,520
Speaker 2: No wonder you learn to wear a mask, baby.

618
00:32:07,480 --> 00:32:11,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, because in the in the business, all you would

619
00:32:11,640 --> 00:32:14,920
Speaker 1: hear was one, you're only as good as your last job,

620
00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:18,880
Speaker 1: and you will be replaced by your understudy. Like who cares?

621
00:32:19,720 --> 00:32:24,480
Speaker 1: You know? So you come to work and you do

622
00:32:24,520 --> 00:32:30,240
Speaker 1: your best, and you consider the people around you. But

623
00:32:30,320 --> 00:32:32,000
Speaker 1: I always tried to make sure I had a smile

624
00:32:32,040 --> 00:32:37,280
Speaker 1: on my face because I really wanted to support the

625
00:32:37,320 --> 00:32:38,040
Speaker 1: atmosphere that.

626
00:32:38,320 --> 00:32:41,360
Speaker 2: So you're going to work your set and it's fun

627
00:32:41,360 --> 00:32:44,840
Speaker 2: and jolly. You just your child just gets diagnosed and

628
00:32:44,880 --> 00:32:48,680
Speaker 2: you're youngs right, you're thirty three, thirty yeah, thirty three,

629
00:32:48,720 --> 00:32:52,280
Speaker 2: you're on set, young mother, and so then how do

630
00:32:52,320 --> 00:32:53,600
Speaker 2: you manage that when you go home?

631
00:32:54,160 --> 00:32:57,680
Speaker 1: I mean, oh, I was constantly running, running, running, So

632
00:32:58,880 --> 00:33:01,360
Speaker 1: Zen was on set. Sometimes therapists would come to my

633
00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:04,160
Speaker 1: dressing room or I was running around trying to find

634
00:33:04,200 --> 00:33:07,800
Speaker 1: therapy because one of the major problems that most caretakers

635
00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:11,480
Speaker 1: or parents run into is the fact that time is

636
00:33:11,520 --> 00:33:14,080
Speaker 1: not on your side. You need to get that early

637
00:33:14,120 --> 00:33:18,720
Speaker 1: intervention in. But especially in two thousand and one two

638
00:33:18,760 --> 00:33:22,800
Speaker 1: thousand and two when he got the diagnosis, there wasn't

639
00:33:22,800 --> 00:33:25,480
Speaker 1: a lot of resources. There weren't a lot of people

640
00:33:25,480 --> 00:33:28,640
Speaker 1: that I could go to, and even if you did call,

641
00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:30,920
Speaker 1: like a behavioral therapist or a speech therapist or an

642
00:33:30,920 --> 00:33:34,280
Speaker 1: occupational therapist, you were gonna get be on a waiting

643
00:33:34,320 --> 00:33:37,040
Speaker 1: list just to get a call back to make an appointment.

644
00:33:38,680 --> 00:33:43,720
Speaker 1: All of that said, like, I was literally running around,

645
00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:45,520
Speaker 1: and I'm very aggressive when it comes to my kids.

646
00:33:45,560 --> 00:33:48,440
Speaker 1: I'm very, very, very very very aggressive. That people were like,

647
00:33:48,480 --> 00:33:50,960
Speaker 1: how you get an appointment so fast? Because even though

648
00:33:50,960 --> 00:33:53,200
Speaker 1: I'm on this waiting list, I'm still gonna call you

649
00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:56,680
Speaker 1: every single day and you and they got tired of

650
00:33:56,720 --> 00:33:59,719
Speaker 1: my ass and they gave me an appointment. That's how

651
00:33:59,760 --> 00:34:02,800
Speaker 1: I had to operate, That's how I had to work advocating.

652
00:34:03,200 --> 00:34:03,920
Speaker 1: That's my child.

653
00:34:04,080 --> 00:34:12,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, wow, did I answer your question? I think so? Okay.

654
00:34:12,200 --> 00:34:13,759
Speaker 2: I mean, I was just trying to understand the every

655
00:34:13,840 --> 00:34:21,439
Speaker 2: day of that, like as a woman, young woman, you know, yeah, yeah, yeah,

656
00:34:21,680 --> 00:34:24,600
Speaker 2: Cherry was great. Cherry shared. We had Cherry on the show.

657
00:34:25,160 --> 00:34:28,880
Speaker 2: I don't know how many months ago, but I understood

658
00:34:28,880 --> 00:34:32,799
Speaker 2: a lot about you know, some of her fears of

659
00:34:32,920 --> 00:34:36,760
Speaker 2: raising a child, and a black child, a black child

660
00:34:37,680 --> 00:34:40,320
Speaker 2: also what that how challenge. You know, she was afraid

661
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:42,480
Speaker 2: to let him out in the street. She struggled with

662
00:34:42,520 --> 00:34:45,839
Speaker 2: his independence. You know, it's not a small thing.

663
00:34:45,880 --> 00:34:47,520
Speaker 3: We're like, oh, yes, my child was on the and

664
00:34:47,600 --> 00:34:49,560
Speaker 3: I showed up and I worked and I was but

665
00:34:49,640 --> 00:34:53,600
Speaker 3: like that's a heavy burden for a mother to carry.

666
00:34:53,360 --> 00:34:56,759
Speaker 1: Absolutely, And you know, I remember growing up in work

667
00:34:56,840 --> 00:35:00,960
Speaker 1: right in the seventies eighties, and one of the things

668
00:35:00,960 --> 00:35:04,520
Speaker 1: my mother was really really fearful of when my brothers,

669
00:35:04,840 --> 00:35:07,799
Speaker 1: because I have three brothers by my mom and dad,

670
00:35:09,760 --> 00:35:10,960
Speaker 1: when they would go out of.

671
00:35:10,880 --> 00:35:12,320
Speaker 2: The house and leave the house.

672
00:35:12,719 --> 00:35:17,600
Speaker 1: She was deathly afraid of whatever the gang members that

673
00:35:18,640 --> 00:35:24,400
Speaker 1: lived in that area, of them getting you know, attacked

674
00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:30,279
Speaker 1: by that or police, you know, and just as black men.

675
00:35:31,640 --> 00:35:35,040
Speaker 1: But I have a black child on a spectrum, and

676
00:35:35,080 --> 00:35:36,960
Speaker 1: when you have a black child that's on a spectrum,

677
00:35:36,960 --> 00:35:39,520
Speaker 1: sometimes they might have ticks and quirks, or they can't

678
00:35:39,600 --> 00:35:42,880
Speaker 1: keep their body still. And that was one of my

679
00:35:42,960 --> 00:35:48,480
Speaker 1: biggest fears that you know, law enforcement wouldn't they're not

680
00:35:49,920 --> 00:35:53,319
Speaker 1: back then, they weren't educated or trained in this type

681
00:35:53,360 --> 00:35:59,160
Speaker 1: of diversity or what autism looks like. So his movements

682
00:35:59,719 --> 00:36:03,200
Speaker 1: or the way that he might you know, move his body,

683
00:36:03,680 --> 00:36:05,719
Speaker 1: put his hands behind his back when he's nervous, he

684
00:36:05,719 --> 00:36:10,000
Speaker 1: puts his hands behind his back. I was afraid that

685
00:36:10,040 --> 00:36:14,000
Speaker 1: they would mistake it for non compliance or there was

686
00:36:14,040 --> 00:36:16,399
Speaker 1: a gun in his back, you know, and behind him

687
00:36:16,560 --> 00:36:19,120
Speaker 1: or something. And so I have to think about that

688
00:36:19,200 --> 00:36:22,920
Speaker 1: all the time until we would practice with Sin to

689
00:36:23,120 --> 00:36:25,920
Speaker 1: keep his body straight just in case he was approached

690
00:36:26,120 --> 00:36:27,040
Speaker 1: by an officer.

691
00:36:27,080 --> 00:36:30,040
Speaker 2: I know, right that breaks hard for him. Yeah, any

692
00:36:30,080 --> 00:36:32,799
Speaker 2: kid who you know, the fact that kids have to

693
00:36:32,800 --> 00:36:35,200
Speaker 2: do that, absolutely it's heartbreaking.

694
00:36:34,719 --> 00:36:37,320
Speaker 1: The fact that a mother has to train their kid to,

695
00:36:37,840 --> 00:36:40,239
Speaker 1: you know, make sure you get a receipt in a

696
00:36:40,280 --> 00:36:42,320
Speaker 1: bag when you leave. I don't care if it's a

697
00:36:42,320 --> 00:36:45,640
Speaker 1: piece of gum, Get a bag and a receipt before

698
00:36:45,680 --> 00:36:48,600
Speaker 1: you so when you walk out, nobody assumes you're stealing.

699
00:36:49,480 --> 00:36:51,360
Speaker 1: Those are things that you have to teach your I

700
00:36:52,480 --> 00:36:54,719
Speaker 1: but See, that's the thing you gotta teach. Latino and

701
00:36:54,800 --> 00:36:58,520
Speaker 1: Black kids have to know these kind of things because

702
00:36:58,560 --> 00:37:00,879
Speaker 1: people automatically assume, yeah, the.

703
00:37:00,760 --> 00:37:05,120
Speaker 2: Worst of them get a receipt in that bag. Do

704
00:37:05,200 --> 00:37:06,920
Speaker 2: you have a good support system or did you then?

705
00:37:07,120 --> 00:37:08,840
Speaker 2: Because now I feel like there are so many women.

706
00:37:09,480 --> 00:37:13,239
Speaker 1: I had a very I had a very limited There

707
00:37:13,440 --> 00:37:17,400
Speaker 1: was a j to Sena, my friend from high school, Sahira,

708
00:37:20,200 --> 00:37:23,800
Speaker 1: not a lot the ones that I could really rely

709
00:37:23,920 --> 00:37:26,879
Speaker 1: on rely on. And a girl named don Donnielle that

710
00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:30,840
Speaker 1: I met in Los Angeles. Wow, that's small, very small.

711
00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:35,000
Speaker 1: They were all moms. They kind of understood and but

712
00:37:35,080 --> 00:37:37,000
Speaker 1: they gave me the support I needed to get me

713
00:37:37,080 --> 00:37:42,000
Speaker 1: through this diagnosis. Yeah, it might have been one more,

714
00:37:42,080 --> 00:37:46,560
Speaker 1: but oh Holly Robinson P Hall Robinson P. Really helped

715
00:37:46,600 --> 00:37:47,680
Speaker 1: me do all of this.

716
00:37:47,920 --> 00:37:50,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, because she's navigated those waters.

717
00:37:50,200 --> 00:37:53,319
Speaker 1: She did asked me and she was a advocate. She

718
00:37:53,520 --> 00:37:55,520
Speaker 1: was She was the earliest advocate that I know. She

719
00:37:55,800 --> 00:37:57,400
Speaker 1: was the first person I called. And then there was

720
00:37:57,760 --> 00:38:02,160
Speaker 1: also Lorna Kyle, who is the entertainer's wife, so she

721
00:38:02,760 --> 00:38:06,319
Speaker 1: during that time. They were all very very supportive and

722
00:38:07,000 --> 00:38:11,440
Speaker 1: kind of helped me. Holly the most because she understood

723
00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:15,960
Speaker 1: it in a different way. But you mentioned Cherry and

724
00:38:16,000 --> 00:38:20,279
Speaker 1: Shary and I have become sisters in this, in this

725
00:38:20,440 --> 00:38:27,400
Speaker 1: in the autism community, and we've been sisters in you know,

726
00:38:28,560 --> 00:38:30,920
Speaker 1: just helping one another and supporting one another and pushing

727
00:38:30,960 --> 00:38:34,160
Speaker 1: one another. And we always call each other the queens

728
00:38:34,160 --> 00:38:34,720
Speaker 1: of pivot.

729
00:38:36,080 --> 00:38:39,360
Speaker 2: I love a good pot Yes, I love a good pivot.

730
00:38:39,880 --> 00:38:41,520
Speaker 2: Where are you with love in your life?

731
00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:41,759
Speaker 1: Now?

732
00:38:41,920 --> 00:38:46,720
Speaker 2: What you said, Ta, that was a very direct question.

733
00:38:48,880 --> 00:38:52,400
Speaker 2: Where are you with love? Where do you stand with it?

734
00:38:52,480 --> 00:38:55,520
Speaker 2: What does it mean to you? I'm not saying who's

735
00:38:55,600 --> 00:38:56,319
Speaker 2: loving on you?

736
00:38:56,440 --> 00:38:58,160
Speaker 1: No? No, no, What does it mean to me? I

737
00:38:58,239 --> 00:39:01,919
Speaker 1: don't know. I'm still trying to figure out the love

738
00:39:01,960 --> 00:39:06,799
Speaker 1: for myself. I'm still unpack and all of that. I

739
00:39:06,880 --> 00:39:13,440
Speaker 1: don't I know that I love people. I just don't

740
00:39:13,480 --> 00:39:23,160
Speaker 1: know if I'm loved back by people. That's a really

741
00:39:23,160 --> 00:39:24,360
Speaker 1: hard statement to say.

742
00:39:24,920 --> 00:39:25,800
Speaker 2: Let me tell you this story.

743
00:39:25,840 --> 00:39:28,759
Speaker 1: So I was doing this thing with Shery Ralph. It

744
00:39:28,840 --> 00:39:31,400
Speaker 1: was called Divisibly Singing right, and on the show was

745
00:39:32,160 --> 00:39:36,279
Speaker 1: Brenda Russell Piano in the Dark. Piano in the Dark.

746
00:39:36,400 --> 00:39:40,279
Speaker 1: She's a fantastic writer and she was a well known

747
00:39:40,320 --> 00:39:45,160
Speaker 1: singer in the in the eighties nineties. In the dark

748
00:39:45,280 --> 00:39:49,040
Speaker 1: was one of one of my favorite writers and singers.

749
00:39:49,120 --> 00:39:52,160
Speaker 1: Right but she was doing the show with me, and

750
00:39:52,760 --> 00:39:58,359
Speaker 1: she also wrote you can reach Me but trell right,

751
00:39:58,840 --> 00:40:02,399
Speaker 1: get there if again. And I asked her, I said

752
00:40:02,520 --> 00:40:06,600
Speaker 1: that song. I said, God, it's so beautiful.

753
00:40:07,040 --> 00:40:08,959
Speaker 2: I don't care how you get there, just get get.

754
00:40:08,880 --> 00:40:11,080
Speaker 1: There if you can. I said, oh, are you talking

755
00:40:11,160 --> 00:40:15,359
Speaker 1: about when you wrote that song? And she says, oh, yeah,

756
00:40:15,400 --> 00:40:19,279
Speaker 1: that's where people get it, you know, misconstrued because I

757
00:40:19,320 --> 00:40:21,920
Speaker 1: wasn't talking about a person. I was talking about love itself.

758
00:40:21,920 --> 00:40:23,200
Speaker 1: I've never been loved in my life.

759
00:40:23,760 --> 00:40:25,160
Speaker 2: Oh, And I.

760
00:40:25,120 --> 00:40:29,000
Speaker 1: Did like this, And then the meaning the words started

761
00:40:29,040 --> 00:40:31,040
Speaker 1: going in my head. The meaning of the words took

762
00:40:31,080 --> 00:40:37,080
Speaker 1: on a different a whole different, veneca whole different meaning.

763
00:40:37,239 --> 00:40:38,319
Speaker 2: Yeah. Wow.

764
00:40:38,600 --> 00:40:44,759
Speaker 1: And she was maybe thirty something forty years old at

765
00:40:44,760 --> 00:40:48,520
Speaker 1: the most, and I was like, you've never been loved

766
00:40:48,520 --> 00:40:53,520
Speaker 1: in your life? And then now I am here, in

767
00:40:53,640 --> 00:41:00,440
Speaker 1: this moment kind of more understanding her words. I have

768
00:41:00,640 --> 00:41:07,360
Speaker 1: loved and I put my whole heart into it. I

769
00:41:07,440 --> 00:41:09,440
Speaker 1: not only believing the good of man, I also believed

770
00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:16,720
Speaker 1: in marriage, commitment, all of the things. And I'm still

771
00:41:16,760 --> 00:41:25,399
Speaker 1: waiting to be loved properly the way that I define all.

772
00:41:26,440 --> 00:41:33,719
Speaker 1: Maybe that's not fair to somebody, look that it should

773
00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:38,319
Speaker 1: be fair to you. But again, I'm such a giver.

774
00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:41,560
Speaker 1: I've given, given, given, given, giving, given, given. Yeah, and

775
00:41:41,920 --> 00:41:44,759
Speaker 1: I'm still waiting for that to come. I have hope

776
00:41:45,800 --> 00:41:50,960
Speaker 1: that somebody will love me past Gina m So I'm open.

777
00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:53,279
Speaker 2: You feel like that got in the way. Gina got

778
00:41:53,320 --> 00:41:53,760
Speaker 2: in the way.

779
00:41:53,880 --> 00:41:57,279
Speaker 1: I don't think Gina itself got in the way of you.

780
00:41:58,040 --> 00:42:00,879
Speaker 1: I think my perception about self man gotten in the way.

781
00:42:01,600 --> 00:42:07,560
Speaker 1: Maybe back then I was okay with crumbs. I was

782
00:42:07,600 --> 00:42:08,160
Speaker 1: okay with.

783
00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:16,800
Speaker 2: I don't know you were. You were okay with you

784
00:42:16,840 --> 00:42:17,919
Speaker 2: doing all the things.

785
00:42:18,040 --> 00:42:20,799
Speaker 1: I was okay with loving on people because I thought

786
00:42:20,840 --> 00:42:24,360
Speaker 1: that was my job, that was what my job was.

787
00:42:24,400 --> 00:42:26,520
Speaker 1: From him, how.

788
00:42:28,040 --> 00:42:29,040
Speaker 2: I feel that so deeply.

789
00:42:29,239 --> 00:42:31,719
Speaker 1: I know I've never had an interview like this.

790
00:42:31,840 --> 00:42:34,840
Speaker 2: By the way, really, thank you for trusting me, and

791
00:42:34,880 --> 00:42:38,600
Speaker 2: thank you for that. I do I appreciate that. Thank you, honey.

792
00:42:38,840 --> 00:42:41,200
Speaker 2: I know we got real. It's real. It is people,

793
00:42:41,239 --> 00:42:43,719
Speaker 2: you know, people trying to figure it out. Everybody's work

794
00:42:43,800 --> 00:42:46,120
Speaker 2: around life, fronting like they got it all together.

795
00:42:46,200 --> 00:42:50,719
Speaker 1: Nobody got together together. Nobody got it, and and it's

796
00:42:50,840 --> 00:42:54,120
Speaker 1: interesting because I'm so much more than the characters that

797
00:42:54,160 --> 00:42:57,840
Speaker 1: people have seen me play, much more than the smile

798
00:42:58,239 --> 00:43:03,359
Speaker 1: that I wear on my face all times. I'm so yes, yes,

799
00:43:03,440 --> 00:43:06,840
Speaker 1: and I'm learning. I'm I'm peeling away the onion in

800
00:43:07,000 --> 00:43:11,000
Speaker 1: therapy and in my friendships and in my now relationships.

801
00:43:11,360 --> 00:43:15,839
Speaker 1: You know that. Yeah, Well, I don't mean I don't

802
00:43:15,840 --> 00:43:17,319
Speaker 1: have no situationships. I'm just.

803
00:43:19,600 --> 00:43:20,879
Speaker 2: Until you find that love.

804
00:43:21,960 --> 00:43:24,160
Speaker 1: I ain't by myself now.

805
00:43:25,840 --> 00:43:27,120
Speaker 2: You're not opposed to a good time.

806
00:43:27,320 --> 00:43:31,200
Speaker 1: Yes, I'm too grown for this. What we deal with,

807
00:43:32,280 --> 00:43:33,000
Speaker 1: what were dealing with?

808
00:43:33,400 --> 00:43:38,160
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I still want to love for you,

809
00:43:38,200 --> 00:43:40,239
Speaker 2: if that's what you want for yourself. Do you want that?

810
00:43:41,800 --> 00:43:46,279
Speaker 1: I just want to know who I am completely. I

811
00:43:46,320 --> 00:43:49,880
Speaker 1: want to be the best need that I could be. First,

812
00:43:50,719 --> 00:43:53,719
Speaker 1: I want to be able to have and work on

813
00:43:54,040 --> 00:44:00,880
Speaker 1: all the baggage and unpack that before I'm super committed

814
00:44:00,920 --> 00:44:06,279
Speaker 1: to someone so they get the best part of me

815
00:44:06,320 --> 00:44:07,840
Speaker 1: and I get the best part of me out of

816
00:44:07,840 --> 00:44:08,560
Speaker 1: the relationship.

817
00:44:09,560 --> 00:44:14,239
Speaker 2: Heard you? Yeah so good? How many times when people

818
00:44:14,280 --> 00:44:15,279
Speaker 2: say damn Gina to you.

819
00:44:15,280 --> 00:44:18,080
Speaker 1: Every damn day of my life, because like three times

820
00:44:18,120 --> 00:44:20,640
Speaker 1: when you were talking today, I want to say, Damn, Gina,

821
00:44:21,640 --> 00:44:24,040
Speaker 1: I really wanted to. I don't mind it, but it

822
00:44:24,080 --> 00:44:27,880
Speaker 1: was so real I didn't want, you know what I mean,

823
00:44:28,360 --> 00:44:30,439
Speaker 1: calls me that every day. I told you he does.

824
00:44:30,960 --> 00:44:32,320
Speaker 2: Every day.

825
00:44:32,360 --> 00:44:37,880
Speaker 1: He doesn't call me, he doesn't call me mommy, mommy.

826
00:44:38,960 --> 00:44:42,840
Speaker 1: He only calls me Gena. You know why, because that

827
00:44:43,000 --> 00:44:46,880
Speaker 1: dag On nollawayans Keenan's daughter was babysitting him when he

828
00:44:47,000 --> 00:44:50,359
Speaker 1: was like three years old, right, And I never let

829
00:44:50,440 --> 00:44:52,440
Speaker 1: my kids watch my work because I just wanted them

830
00:44:52,440 --> 00:44:54,359
Speaker 1: to know me for mommy. I didn't. I didn't let

831
00:44:54,400 --> 00:44:56,800
Speaker 1: them watch my work. I didn't put them on red carpets.

832
00:44:56,840 --> 00:44:58,640
Speaker 1: I wanted them to be as far away from Hollywood

833
00:44:58,640 --> 00:45:01,160
Speaker 1: as possibly. I did do a red carpet once because

834
00:45:01,160 --> 00:45:02,680
Speaker 1: it was a Disney thing, so I could take them

835
00:45:02,680 --> 00:45:06,440
Speaker 1: to a Disney But other than that, no, they weren't

836
00:45:06,480 --> 00:45:08,720
Speaker 1: on the red carpet when they were little, on everything.

837
00:45:08,920 --> 00:45:15,200
Speaker 1: And she was babysitting him one day and I came

838
00:45:15,280 --> 00:45:19,040
Speaker 1: home and they're streaming The Martin Show, and so ZIKEI

839
00:45:19,160 --> 00:45:22,000
Speaker 1: turns he's straight. He goes, hey, Gina, and he's been

840
00:45:22,040 --> 00:45:26,279
Speaker 1: calling me Tina ever since. And I'd be answering because

841
00:45:26,280 --> 00:45:29,000
Speaker 1: I'm tired. I had a time.

842
00:45:30,040 --> 00:45:38,000
Speaker 5: Okay, God, So they watched they were all five seasons

843
00:45:38,000 --> 00:45:41,960
Speaker 5: and then goes, you're welcome and I'll kill you.

844
00:45:42,280 --> 00:45:45,040
Speaker 1: Why you got this boy? So from then on he's

845
00:45:45,080 --> 00:45:45,920
Speaker 1: been calling me Gina.

846
00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:48,480
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I love that.

847
00:45:48,719 --> 00:45:49,560
Speaker 1: So I'm used to it.

848
00:45:49,920 --> 00:45:51,600
Speaker 2: We have a couple. It's so good. I could talk

849
00:45:51,640 --> 00:45:52,600
Speaker 2: to you all day. Okay.

850
00:45:52,640 --> 00:45:55,279
Speaker 3: So our first Our first segment is a voice noted

851
00:45:55,280 --> 00:45:58,759
Speaker 3: segment comes from one of our IRL listeners and usually

852
00:45:58,760 --> 00:45:59,720
Speaker 3: a question our comment.

853
00:46:00,120 --> 00:46:00,759
Speaker 2: This one is for you.

854
00:46:01,239 --> 00:46:05,000
Speaker 4: So my question would be, how do I begin to

855
00:46:05,080 --> 00:46:09,840
Speaker 4: start over when I've already gone through so much turmoils,

856
00:46:09,880 --> 00:46:13,840
Speaker 4: so much trauma, and life as I know it is

857
00:46:13,920 --> 00:46:16,840
Speaker 4: no longer the same. How do I maneuver through turning fifty?

858
00:46:17,080 --> 00:46:19,239
Speaker 4: Like I feel like fifty is where I should have

859
00:46:19,280 --> 00:46:21,280
Speaker 4: been at my peak, and I was headed there before

860
00:46:21,640 --> 00:46:24,759
Speaker 4: everything else, So just looking where do I go from here?

861
00:46:24,760 --> 00:46:28,759
Speaker 2: How do I start over at fifty? Wow, that's a

862
00:46:28,760 --> 00:46:30,960
Speaker 2: great question. So I just feel like she was listening

863
00:46:30,960 --> 00:46:36,120
Speaker 2: to our interview today, So what was her name? Lady

864
00:46:36,239 --> 00:46:36,600
Speaker 2: Lady T?

865
00:46:36,800 --> 00:46:42,279
Speaker 1: Hey, lady T. So when I had to start over,

866
00:46:42,680 --> 00:46:44,200
Speaker 1: I really had to.

867
00:46:46,560 --> 00:46:47,399
Speaker 2: Start over from what.

868
00:46:49,080 --> 00:46:54,600
Speaker 1: From like divorce, So I'm a back up. So I've been,

869
00:46:54,719 --> 00:46:58,200
Speaker 1: Like I said, I was in this business since I

870
00:46:58,280 --> 00:47:02,279
Speaker 1: was three years old. So I went straight from a

871
00:47:02,400 --> 00:47:10,040
Speaker 1: mamager and them being my manager into a marriage. And

872
00:47:10,200 --> 00:47:17,160
Speaker 1: when I had to start over, and when I left,

873
00:47:17,640 --> 00:47:21,280
Speaker 1: I had to go from ground zero, complete zero, complete nothing.

874
00:47:22,320 --> 00:47:25,960
Speaker 1: And it was scary, but I kept visualizing.

875
00:47:25,440 --> 00:47:26,799
Speaker 2: You know what, I kept visualizing what.

876
00:47:28,320 --> 00:47:32,399
Speaker 1: You know, how a baby when they're first learning how

877
00:47:32,400 --> 00:47:35,680
Speaker 1: to walk, they get up on their feet and they

878
00:47:35,800 --> 00:47:39,800
Speaker 1: kind of teeter and they do this little wobble or wobble.

879
00:47:41,320 --> 00:47:46,000
Speaker 1: If you look at their faces, there's this excitement, this thrill.

880
00:47:47,400 --> 00:47:49,880
Speaker 1: They know they're going to fall on their little pamper butts.

881
00:47:50,200 --> 00:47:52,799
Speaker 1: They know they about the fall, but they embrace the

882
00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:55,960
Speaker 1: fall and then they get right back up. I think

883
00:47:56,000 --> 00:47:59,600
Speaker 1: sometimes when we're adults we forget to enjoy and embrace

884
00:47:59,640 --> 00:48:04,120
Speaker 1: the fall. That everything could look like it feels devastating,

885
00:48:04,120 --> 00:48:08,600
Speaker 1: but it's more like a beautiful devastation. And I just

886
00:48:08,719 --> 00:48:11,279
Speaker 1: kept saying, things are going to get better. A friend

887
00:48:11,320 --> 00:48:14,000
Speaker 1: of mine named Danny, who was one of the one

888
00:48:14,040 --> 00:48:16,759
Speaker 1: of the people who really helped me through. She told

889
00:48:16,840 --> 00:48:20,400
Speaker 1: me she's my Actually she's my writing partner and and

890
00:48:21,320 --> 00:48:25,160
Speaker 1: co producer at my production company. But she kept saying,

891
00:48:25,320 --> 00:48:30,399
Speaker 1: change the narrative, Sys, don't be the victim, don't tell

892
00:48:30,400 --> 00:48:34,000
Speaker 1: this story over and over again. Make new stories. It's

893
00:48:34,040 --> 00:48:39,000
Speaker 1: okay to start again. It's scary, it hurts, it's complicated,

894
00:48:39,320 --> 00:48:42,160
Speaker 1: but it's okay to start again. You got this. And

895
00:48:42,200 --> 00:48:46,080
Speaker 1: so I had to stop singing the same song over

896
00:48:46,280 --> 00:48:51,400
Speaker 1: and over just you know, I'm this happened to me.

897
00:48:51,520 --> 00:48:54,279
Speaker 1: That happened to me. I don't think I'm gonna be

898
00:48:54,320 --> 00:48:56,799
Speaker 1: able to do this because now I got It's just

899
00:48:56,840 --> 00:48:59,040
Speaker 1: so it's the same thing that goes on in your head,

900
00:48:59,640 --> 00:49:05,160
Speaker 1: you know. And I had to stop, embrace the fall

901
00:49:06,280 --> 00:49:07,360
Speaker 1: and change the narrative.

902
00:49:08,480 --> 00:49:09,320
Speaker 2: What is the narrative?

903
00:49:09,400 --> 00:49:14,600
Speaker 1: Now, do everything you want to do that you've ever

904
00:49:14,719 --> 00:49:18,400
Speaker 1: wanted to do in your life. Put yourself first, Tisha,

905
00:49:19,800 --> 00:49:24,120
Speaker 1: put yourself first, and every Angie and everybody else will

906
00:49:24,160 --> 00:49:28,000
Speaker 1: fall into place. If you're okay, then they'll be okay.

907
00:49:28,280 --> 00:49:30,719
Speaker 1: But if you're not okay, how the hell you're gonna

908
00:49:30,719 --> 00:49:33,480
Speaker 1: get it in? So that's where I am right now.

909
00:49:35,520 --> 00:49:36,120
Speaker 2: Damn.

910
00:49:40,520 --> 00:49:41,600
Speaker 1: That was so apple.

911
00:49:44,719 --> 00:49:46,480
Speaker 2: That's great. I felt that so deep.

912
00:49:47,440 --> 00:49:49,480
Speaker 3: Hey, guys, support for this podcast is brought to you

913
00:49:49,480 --> 00:49:53,120
Speaker 3: by Walden University. Have you ever thought to yourself, what

914
00:49:53,239 --> 00:49:56,000
Speaker 3: if I could go after what I actually want and

915
00:49:56,040 --> 00:49:59,080
Speaker 3: I could really make a difference. Well, you are not alone,

916
00:49:59,200 --> 00:50:00,800
Speaker 3: and this is exactly why I want to tell you

917
00:50:00,880 --> 00:50:02,080
Speaker 3: about Walden University.

918
00:50:02,320 --> 00:50:05,799
Speaker 6: For over fifty years, Walden has helped working adults like

919
00:50:05,920 --> 00:50:09,640
Speaker 6: you get the w with the knowledge, the skills and

920
00:50:09,719 --> 00:50:11,879
Speaker 6: everything you need to build the future that you want.

921
00:50:12,120 --> 00:50:14,360
Speaker 6: And you can make a difference where it matters most.

922
00:50:14,560 --> 00:50:17,080
Speaker 6: If you've been waiting for the right moment, this is it.

923
00:50:17,320 --> 00:50:20,680
Speaker 6: Head to waldeneu dot edu and take that first step.

924
00:50:20,880 --> 00:50:25,040
Speaker 3: Walden University set a course for change, Certified to operate

925
00:50:25,080 --> 00:50:28,160
Speaker 3: by SHIV. Now, welcome to our irl bowl of real

926
00:50:28,239 --> 00:50:29,880
Speaker 3: questions about real life.

927
00:50:29,960 --> 00:50:32,680
Speaker 2: Okay, see what you get? You can pick. You can pick,

928
00:50:32,680 --> 00:50:34,160
Speaker 2: so you get one that speaks to you. You don't have

929
00:50:34,200 --> 00:50:36,160
Speaker 2: to pick your first one because we have the magic vanity.

930
00:50:36,239 --> 00:50:37,600
Speaker 1: I'm a glasses on, so let's see.

931
00:50:37,640 --> 00:50:39,160
Speaker 2: Okay, I can help you if you need, because I

932
00:50:39,200 --> 00:50:39,800
Speaker 2: had Lasik.

933
00:50:40,320 --> 00:50:43,400
Speaker 1: How important is money to you? It's a good question.

934
00:50:45,160 --> 00:50:48,319
Speaker 1: Money ain't important to me. Money ain't my God. And

935
00:50:48,400 --> 00:50:50,799
Speaker 1: I think that's where a lot of people get hung

936
00:50:50,880 --> 00:50:55,319
Speaker 1: up in this business. They make money their god. They

937
00:50:55,400 --> 00:51:03,720
Speaker 1: make prestige something that they need, fame, prestige, control, money.

938
00:51:04,000 --> 00:51:08,560
Speaker 1: Money was never my god. So when money was gone,

939
00:51:09,400 --> 00:51:14,520
Speaker 1: I've been poor before. I can make it again. So

940
00:51:14,640 --> 00:51:18,200
Speaker 1: it's never been something that was the end all be

941
00:51:18,280 --> 00:51:23,040
Speaker 1: off of me. It never will be. My relationships are

942
00:51:23,080 --> 00:51:26,239
Speaker 1: more important to me. The way I affect people is

943
00:51:26,239 --> 00:51:29,000
Speaker 1: more important to me. Utilizing the gift that God gave

944
00:51:29,040 --> 00:51:32,719
Speaker 1: me is more important to me. Making people forget their problems,

945
00:51:32,719 --> 00:51:35,279
Speaker 1: making them cry, making them laugh, making them think, making

946
00:51:35,280 --> 00:51:37,839
Speaker 1: them change their mindset is more important to me. That

947
00:51:38,000 --> 00:51:40,600
Speaker 1: is what a true artist is. I'm a true artist.

948
00:51:40,760 --> 00:51:42,880
Speaker 1: And this shit right here don't mean shit to me.

949
00:51:44,040 --> 00:51:48,200
Speaker 1: Heard you, sis, But it's not bad when you get it. Well,

950
00:51:48,960 --> 00:51:54,359
Speaker 1: that benefits to the shit like. But if you are

951
00:51:54,440 --> 00:51:56,759
Speaker 1: still you have integrity and you're a good person and

952
00:51:56,800 --> 00:52:01,040
Speaker 1: you still can do what you do, it's going to come.

953
00:52:01,800 --> 00:52:04,000
Speaker 1: You go and get blessed by it, and you're going

954
00:52:04,080 --> 00:52:06,000
Speaker 1: to be able to take care of your family. But

955
00:52:06,040 --> 00:52:09,000
Speaker 1: it doesn't have to be your God. Yeah, it never

956
00:52:09,040 --> 00:52:11,319
Speaker 1: has to be your God.

957
00:52:12,160 --> 00:52:14,640
Speaker 2: You answer the ship out of that. Damn, we want

958
00:52:14,680 --> 00:52:20,080
Speaker 2: to get another one. Let's do listen like baseball, let's

959
00:52:20,120 --> 00:52:23,480
Speaker 2: than three listen three questions?

960
00:52:23,560 --> 00:52:27,160
Speaker 1: This one? All right, what's one thing you hope never

961
00:52:27,360 --> 00:52:36,840
Speaker 1: changes about you? How loud I am?

962
00:52:37,560 --> 00:52:38,680
Speaker 2: I know, I like it too.

963
00:52:39,600 --> 00:52:42,800
Speaker 1: I'm really loud, but it's actually part of the mask.

964
00:52:44,400 --> 00:52:49,040
Speaker 1: I do enjoy it. But it has been a survival technique. Actually, so,

965
00:52:49,560 --> 00:52:51,759
Speaker 1: I'm actually a very shy person. Believe it or not.

966
00:52:52,760 --> 00:52:55,520
Speaker 1: Nobody would believe that I would be. Nobody would, but

967
00:52:55,560 --> 00:52:58,640
Speaker 1: I also would believe it. Yeah, I'm actually quite shy,

968
00:52:58,719 --> 00:53:03,400
Speaker 1: and I hide it with Joe and loudness, and it

969
00:53:03,480 --> 00:53:07,520
Speaker 1: has always been a strategic move.

970
00:53:07,640 --> 00:53:10,000
Speaker 2: And it's the problem is that it's affected.

971
00:53:10,120 --> 00:53:13,120
Speaker 1: It's so effective and we're and you're so good at it. Yes,

972
00:53:13,400 --> 00:53:14,560
Speaker 1: I'm so loud.

973
00:53:14,840 --> 00:53:18,440
Speaker 3: You demand attention and then when you get the people's attention,

974
00:53:18,880 --> 00:53:22,160
Speaker 3: you deliver. You're funny, you have some you have meaningful

975
00:53:22,200 --> 00:53:25,880
Speaker 3: things to offer and say. It's it's it's it's the

976
00:53:26,000 --> 00:53:28,960
Speaker 3: reason why I'm here. Like being able to do interviews

977
00:53:29,040 --> 00:53:32,719
Speaker 3: like this, which is, like I said, I don't think

978
00:53:32,760 --> 00:53:33,200
Speaker 3: that I've.

979
00:53:33,080 --> 00:53:35,480
Speaker 1: Ever had an interview like this, this in depth, this

980
00:53:39,440 --> 00:53:43,560
Speaker 1: just what's the word, I'm trying to find the word.

981
00:53:44,000 --> 00:53:47,040
Speaker 2: Thank you? I feel you know what I'm saying. I

982
00:53:47,080 --> 00:53:49,640
Speaker 2: think it's just honest, honest.

983
00:53:49,840 --> 00:53:53,920
Speaker 1: And inviting, and I don't feel like I have to

984
00:53:54,120 --> 00:53:56,359
Speaker 1: put up a guard with you.

985
00:53:56,920 --> 00:53:57,359
Speaker 2: Thank you.

986
00:53:57,360 --> 00:54:01,000
Speaker 1: You're very good at what you do, so I'm able

987
00:54:01,040 --> 00:54:03,520
Speaker 1: to say things that most people have never heard me

988
00:54:03,600 --> 00:54:08,200
Speaker 1: say before. What was the fucking question? Oh the loudness.

989
00:54:08,719 --> 00:54:12,600
Speaker 1: I love being that I was able to be strategic

990
00:54:13,000 --> 00:54:17,200
Speaker 1: with how loud I truly am.

991
00:54:16,160 --> 00:54:20,719
Speaker 2: Not because I'm actually quite shy. Yes, I could see

992
00:54:20,719 --> 00:54:22,799
Speaker 2: that though, but it has worked for you. But you

993
00:54:22,800 --> 00:54:25,840
Speaker 2: are so self aware now that you know that it's

994
00:54:25,880 --> 00:54:27,120
Speaker 2: it's a tool in your toolbox.

995
00:54:27,760 --> 00:54:29,640
Speaker 1: And plus, when I was eleven and twelve when I

996
00:54:29,640 --> 00:54:32,400
Speaker 1: met to Shina, well I say eleven and twelve. Tashina

997
00:54:32,480 --> 00:54:34,000
Speaker 1: was eleven. I was twelve. She likes your people to

998
00:54:34,040 --> 00:54:36,319
Speaker 1: tell She likes for me to tell people that because

999
00:54:36,320 --> 00:54:39,080
Speaker 1: she wants everybody to know she's younger than me. So

1000
00:54:39,840 --> 00:54:43,040
Speaker 1: when I first met her on an audition and she

1001
00:54:43,160 --> 00:54:46,720
Speaker 1: was like, look, you're so shy. Why are you so shy?

1002
00:54:47,120 --> 00:54:50,040
Speaker 1: Speak up for yourself. I hate shy people. Left. So

1003
00:54:50,080 --> 00:54:53,120
Speaker 1: she forced me out of my shyness.

1004
00:54:53,160 --> 00:54:54,440
Speaker 2: What a blessing it was.

1005
00:54:54,840 --> 00:54:56,880
Speaker 1: And then she would take me all around all the

1006
00:54:56,960 --> 00:54:59,799
Speaker 1: gays in the seventies, and honey, they would crack on you.

1007
00:55:00,160 --> 00:55:02,160
Speaker 1: They would let your ass have it, so you had

1008
00:55:02,160 --> 00:55:05,160
Speaker 1: to get thick skins. So she was actually the blessing

1009
00:55:05,160 --> 00:55:07,040
Speaker 1: that helped me navigate the life.

1010
00:55:07,320 --> 00:55:09,359
Speaker 2: How amazing it is to have a friend that long

1011
00:55:09,480 --> 00:55:12,680
Speaker 2: you were? How old eleven and twelve? Yea, my best friend.

1012
00:55:12,680 --> 00:55:14,920
Speaker 2: We've been friends since we're eight years old. So I

1013
00:55:15,200 --> 00:55:17,840
Speaker 2: know the benefit of that. Somebody that has seen you

1014
00:55:17,920 --> 00:55:19,080
Speaker 2: through all the season.

1015
00:55:18,960 --> 00:55:22,320
Speaker 1: Knows you like like we finish each other's sentences.

1016
00:55:22,360 --> 00:55:25,320
Speaker 2: Yes, I remember things that you don't even remember.

1017
00:55:25,440 --> 00:55:27,560
Speaker 1: I do not play about to Sina Arnold. That's one

1018
00:55:27,560 --> 00:55:29,680
Speaker 1: thing I do not play about. I don't play about her.

1019
00:55:30,320 --> 00:55:33,359
Speaker 1: I do not play about to Shina Arnold. That's my girl,

1020
00:55:33,640 --> 00:55:39,040
Speaker 1: that's my friend, that's my sister. And as protective as

1021
00:55:39,160 --> 00:55:41,480
Speaker 1: I am of her, she's just as protective of me.

1022
00:55:41,680 --> 00:55:44,080
Speaker 2: Oh my god, what a blessing that each other.

1023
00:55:44,360 --> 00:55:47,000
Speaker 1: M h yeah, especial. It's bus it's because and we

1024
00:55:47,000 --> 00:55:49,799
Speaker 1: were able to survive this business and not get caught up.

1025
00:55:50,120 --> 00:55:51,440
Speaker 1: We'll wait, We're.

1026
00:55:51,280 --> 00:55:54,399
Speaker 2: Gonna wait for this bullshit, right, I mean, they went

1027
00:55:54,560 --> 00:55:58,120
Speaker 2: crazy on you. They want you to get loud, but

1028
00:55:58,440 --> 00:55:59,120
Speaker 2: you want to be loud.

1029
00:55:59,480 --> 00:56:06,200
Speaker 1: You like, Okay, they're gone. But I was saying that

1030
00:56:06,320 --> 00:56:07,480
Speaker 1: I do not play about.

1031
00:56:07,640 --> 00:56:08,759
Speaker 2: Could you imagine like.

1032
00:56:10,680 --> 00:56:15,560
Speaker 3: Being famous, having that level of success, the success that

1033
00:56:15,600 --> 00:56:19,360
Speaker 3: Martin had that show in the nineties and were fame

1034
00:56:19,480 --> 00:56:22,799
Speaker 3: does the young people and Hollywood. The fact that you

1035
00:56:22,840 --> 00:56:26,279
Speaker 3: were able to navigate those waters with my friends, with

1036
00:56:26,320 --> 00:56:27,440
Speaker 3: your friends.

1037
00:56:27,040 --> 00:56:30,360
Speaker 1: It was like a bubble around us. Our friendship was

1038
00:56:30,360 --> 00:56:33,279
Speaker 1: a bubble, and we helped each other survive through it.

1039
00:56:33,640 --> 00:56:36,239
Speaker 1: We helped each other navigate around it. We kept each

1040
00:56:36,280 --> 00:56:40,239
Speaker 1: other in check, kept each The thing about the two

1041
00:56:40,320 --> 00:56:43,239
Speaker 1: of us is we tell each other the truth. We

1042
00:56:43,320 --> 00:56:47,040
Speaker 1: don't have the yes men around us. We don't want it.

1043
00:56:47,280 --> 00:56:52,680
Speaker 1: That doesn't keep you honest. And we hold each other

1044
00:56:52,680 --> 00:56:56,359
Speaker 1: accountable and keep each other honest, and we do it

1045
00:56:56,440 --> 00:57:01,640
Speaker 1: with so much laughter. She is how I get through life.

1046
00:57:03,480 --> 00:57:04,560
Speaker 1: She helps me.

1047
00:57:06,560 --> 00:57:09,600
Speaker 2: Laugh at everything.

1048
00:57:09,680 --> 00:57:12,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, she'll be like, put an H on your on

1049
00:57:12,600 --> 00:57:15,640
Speaker 1: your shirt, bitch and handle it. Like put the H

1050
00:57:15,719 --> 00:57:20,280
Speaker 1: on your shirt, bitch and handle it. Okay, that's that's

1051
00:57:20,280 --> 00:57:22,720
Speaker 1: because she and Arnold. I love that. I love her.

1052
00:57:22,920 --> 00:57:24,880
Speaker 2: My final I r O question I like to ask

1053
00:57:24,920 --> 00:57:26,640
Speaker 2: everybody on the show. Do you have anything else before

1054
00:57:26,640 --> 00:57:30,240
Speaker 2: I do it? Final question? I like to ask everybody

1055
00:57:30,280 --> 00:57:33,520
Speaker 2: this question. Okay, my final question, My final question. Yes,

1056
00:57:33,880 --> 00:57:37,680
Speaker 2: you are so wonderful today. By the way, if this

1057
00:57:37,680 --> 00:57:40,120
Speaker 2: this a question in the ball, if God were to

1058
00:57:40,160 --> 00:57:50,360
Speaker 2: text you today right now, what would it say.

1059
00:57:51,120 --> 00:57:54,280
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know what God would say

1060
00:57:54,320 --> 00:58:04,320
Speaker 1: to me, and y'all know what God would say. That's

1061
00:58:04,320 --> 00:58:08,240
Speaker 1: what he said, stop being so loud. I know your tricks.

1062
00:58:08,360 --> 00:58:09,400
Speaker 1: That's what he would say.

1063
00:58:09,560 --> 00:58:12,040
Speaker 2: You know, if God texted you stop being so loud,

1064
00:58:12,720 --> 00:58:16,440
Speaker 2: you wouldn't know exactly what he means.

1065
00:58:16,520 --> 00:58:20,120
Speaker 1: He really means, I know what you're doing this. I

1066
00:58:20,200 --> 00:58:26,040
Speaker 1: know what you're doing daughter, you're hiding, so stop being

1067
00:58:26,160 --> 00:58:29,840
Speaker 1: so loud. I'm never gonna stop being so loud. Lord,

1068
00:58:29,880 --> 00:58:33,280
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I think it's Lord, I'm sorry. I don't

1069
00:58:33,360 --> 00:58:35,360
Speaker 1: I don't know if I could do it. It's very hard

1070
00:58:35,480 --> 00:58:38,680
Speaker 1: for me. It's survivalvival technique.

1071
00:58:38,760 --> 00:58:45,959
Speaker 2: Lord, he made, he made you, He knows you. One

1072
00:58:46,040 --> 00:58:48,600
Speaker 2: by the one to shea Arnold by the way, we

1073
00:58:48,640 --> 00:58:52,000
Speaker 2: need her next because I need the flip side of this.

1074
00:58:52,200 --> 00:58:55,800
Speaker 2: I need the flip side of this h story of

1075
00:58:55,840 --> 00:58:58,400
Speaker 2: this duo, my my goal one day would be to

1076
00:58:58,440 --> 00:59:00,440
Speaker 2: have the two of you in the chair together to

1077
00:59:00,720 --> 00:59:01,160
Speaker 2: very soon.

1078
00:59:01,440 --> 00:59:04,160
Speaker 1: I can't say one project happening, you will get both.

1079
00:59:04,200 --> 00:59:06,520
Speaker 2: That would be amazing. I just want to make sure

1080
00:59:06,560 --> 00:59:09,320
Speaker 2: there was nothing else here. I think. So that was amazing.

1081
00:59:09,360 --> 00:59:10,080
Speaker 2: You are brilliant.

1082
00:59:10,400 --> 00:59:14,360
Speaker 1: No, you got to understand Angie issue. Oh you create

1083
00:59:14,400 --> 00:59:18,680
Speaker 1: a safe space for people to speak. Thank you, because

1084
00:59:18,720 --> 00:59:22,800
Speaker 1: we're always so guarded. But the way that you handle

1085
00:59:23,760 --> 00:59:29,600
Speaker 1: your guests, thank you, it's so it's so comforting, So

1086
00:59:29,680 --> 00:59:32,120
Speaker 1: we don't mind saying things that nobody has ever heard.

1087
00:59:33,240 --> 00:59:36,760
Speaker 2: Thank you for having take your camble real life.

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00:59:38,920 --> 00:59:42,000
Speaker 1: I don't like so in real life.

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00:59:42,440 --> 00:59:43,480
Speaker 2: You know that was beautiful.

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00:59:45,480 --> 00:59:47,360
Speaker 1: This is Tisha Campbell in real life.

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00:59:48,640 --> 00:59:49,720
Speaker 2: Hey guys, thanks for watching.

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00:59:49,800 --> 00:59:53,240
Speaker 3: Make sure you subscribe, like comments, and check out all

1093
00:59:53,240 --> 00:59:54,919
Speaker 3: of the other episodes we have on Edge.

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Speaker 2: Martinez I RL Podcast