WEBVTT - #140: Getting Sloppy Drunk and Getting a Guy To Respect You 0:00:01.080 --> 0:00:11.080 Elvis rand Presents off air show Sary Jones and Great 0:00:11.320 --> 0:00:15.480 Tea Episode one and Great t is not here today. 0:00:15.920 --> 0:00:18.120 Got Share hanging out with me and I think, David Brody, 0:00:18.120 --> 0:00:21.640 you'll be in just a couple of minutes. Um, I 0:00:21.680 --> 0:00:23.560 love it. I love when people get in touch with 0:00:23.640 --> 0:00:26.120 us Share. Yeah, I mean, I think we need more 0:00:26.120 --> 0:00:28.520 of that, a little bit more interaction. Right a hundred 0:00:28.520 --> 0:00:31.000 and forty episodes in, people are finally getting the knack 0:00:31.040 --> 0:00:34.319 that they can call us at one one hundred and 0:00:34.520 --> 0:00:37.720 uh get their their dirty laundry. We did say on 0:00:38.280 --> 0:00:40.879 yesterday's episode that you were gonna be here today, So 0:00:40.960 --> 0:00:43.159 I think that's why we have one of our listeners 0:00:43.840 --> 0:00:45.919 calling in in just a couple of seconds. The thing 0:00:45.960 --> 0:00:48.559 that's crazy is we did a really serious show yesterday. 0:00:48.600 --> 0:00:50.480 I don't know if you listened in on it. I did, 0:00:50.640 --> 0:00:52.920 I did. It was serious. It was the New Jersey 0:00:52.920 --> 0:00:55.000 Sharing Network. We're up here or up here and uh, 0:00:55.280 --> 0:00:57.240 you know the you know, our guy Tom came in. 0:00:57.720 --> 0:01:01.880 He had his heart replaced from the New Jersey Sharing Network. 0:01:02.240 --> 0:01:05.520 They gave him a heart. Um, it was crazy, crazy 0:01:05.600 --> 0:01:08.160 hour we spent with them, but it was necessary and 0:01:08.200 --> 0:01:11.640 we got a lot of awesome email too. Uh that 0:01:11.920 --> 0:01:15.240 came in overnight. Maybe we'll save it for later. I 0:01:15.240 --> 0:01:16.720 don't know if I want to bring the mood over 0:01:16.760 --> 0:01:19.520 to this again, but thank you for your email. You 0:01:19.560 --> 0:01:21.560 can always email us at the Affair Show at gmail 0:01:21.600 --> 0:01:25.520 dot com. Really great piece of email, which makes me 0:01:25.640 --> 0:01:27.120 because at first I'm like, should we really do a 0:01:27.160 --> 0:01:29.679 show like this? And after reading the email that we 0:01:29.720 --> 0:01:33.040 got the feedback after yesterday's show, I'm like, it's okay 0:01:33.040 --> 0:01:34.720 to have those kind of shows once in a while. Right, 0:01:34.959 --> 0:01:37.440 It's a little deeper, but it's something that's important and 0:01:37.440 --> 0:01:42.560 it needs to be shared. Yeah, that's right. But I 0:01:42.560 --> 0:01:44.760 do have to also say I loved some of the 0:01:44.800 --> 0:01:47.319 reactions the last time that I was on with the show. Knows, 0:01:47.680 --> 0:01:50.200 I know that that was a little bit more. I 0:01:50.240 --> 0:01:52.880 don't know. I guess should say deep, it's smart, but 0:01:52.960 --> 0:01:57.840 did we call it smartest into the weekend? Well, I 0:01:57.840 --> 0:02:00.040 have to tell you something scary. The message that's that 0:02:00.160 --> 0:02:04.520 I got the responses to that we're just overwhelming. There 0:02:04.520 --> 0:02:06.760 were people that actually went on some of the sites 0:02:06.800 --> 0:02:09.320 that I gave and said they didn't never knew that 0:02:09.360 --> 0:02:11.959 it existed, and they found things that that helped them. 0:02:12.400 --> 0:02:15.200 They spent that just reminding them about the weekend really 0:02:15.200 --> 0:02:18.079 was something that was like more inspirational. I loved all 0:02:18.120 --> 0:02:20.880 the remarks. Thank you everyone for everything that you send 0:02:20.919 --> 0:02:22.919 into me. I love it. Make sure you keep sending 0:02:22.960 --> 0:02:25.960 it in to at scher nos fan page on Facebook. 0:02:26.480 --> 0:02:30.080 That's right. And uh so, so we've been informational and 0:02:30.160 --> 0:02:33.440 we've been deep and smart and smart, and now we're 0:02:33.440 --> 0:02:36.359 going to change all that and get stupid. Oh yeah, 0:02:36.400 --> 0:02:40.839 that's what we need. Hi is this uh Renee? Your 0:02:40.840 --> 0:02:44.880 real name? My real name is Renee. You're cool with 0:02:45.040 --> 0:02:47.160 using your real name on the Affair Show. I'm okay 0:02:47.160 --> 0:02:49.919 with that too right now? I am. Maybe not later, 0:02:50.000 --> 0:02:52.960 but for now you are. As you're driving home, you're 0:02:52.960 --> 0:02:56.800 gonna be like, delete that file, take down the podcast, 0:02:56.919 --> 0:03:01.320 my parents list name edit, edit, edit, So you're you're 0:03:01.320 --> 0:03:03.160 a new fan of All Fair Show. We like that, 0:03:03.280 --> 0:03:06.000 You're not. Are you really an affair head? Just yet? 0:03:06.280 --> 0:03:09.040 Not yet? Right? Not yet. I'm super excited though it 0:03:09.120 --> 0:03:10.960 sounds really awesome. I think you need to binge listen 0:03:11.000 --> 0:03:13.160 to a few episodes to be an affair Yeah, and 0:03:13.160 --> 0:03:16.520 then you can join the nation and everything. Ye whole 0:03:16.600 --> 0:03:19.200 chat room after time. I don't. I don't even know 0:03:19.240 --> 0:03:21.000 what goes on in there. I think most of the 0:03:21.000 --> 0:03:24.920 time it doesn't talk about the show. They're fun people. 0:03:25.120 --> 0:03:27.839 If you like, if you like filthy memes, go into 0:03:27.880 --> 0:03:31.560 the Affair show chat room. Wait, may I suggest baby steps, 0:03:31.600 --> 0:03:38.280 Baby Steps, I want the air. It's a group chat 0:03:38.360 --> 0:03:43.119 on Facebook. It's great, it's awesome. You'll you'll be there 0:03:43.160 --> 0:03:45.280 all day, all night, and they get really filthy after 0:03:45.360 --> 0:03:48.680 dark too. Oh and it goes on. Yeah, but you 0:03:48.720 --> 0:03:51.840 get what. I have to work to devote my fat 0:03:52.360 --> 0:03:55.480 You have a job. Um, yeah, well we'll keep that 0:03:55.520 --> 0:03:59.480 off of this. So you wrote a couple of questions. 0:03:59.600 --> 0:04:05.800 You just spewing, like what's going on in your life? 0:04:05.840 --> 0:04:08.000 I mean, you have some stuff for share knows about 0:04:08.000 --> 0:04:10.800 getting sloppy drunk. I have a lot of things. I 0:04:10.840 --> 0:04:12.160 have a lot of things. I don't know if you 0:04:12.200 --> 0:04:14.960 can help, but clearly I'm not doing well on my own, 0:04:14.960 --> 0:04:19.279 so maybe you can help me. Try. So typically me 0:04:19.279 --> 0:04:20.920 and my friends just go out in the weekend, get 0:04:20.960 --> 0:04:23.760 super super sloppy and don't really remember what happened. You 0:04:23.760 --> 0:04:28.080 can say ship faced, but yeah, like belligerent, like just done. 0:04:28.120 --> 0:04:31.640 Black tapper, black app we'll talk backwards here, so it's 0:04:32.000 --> 0:04:38.200 tissue faced. Oh yeah, yeah, all of you above. But 0:04:38.279 --> 0:04:41.279 we also want like a marriage material man in our lives, 0:04:41.279 --> 0:04:43.239 but we don't really know how to balance like being 0:04:43.240 --> 0:04:45.720 black out and like throwing up and not really remembering 0:04:45.720 --> 0:04:48.800 anything finding a guy that will just take us on 0:04:48.880 --> 0:04:51.719 dates and paper ships. So how does one go to 0:04:51.760 --> 0:04:55.159 the bar, spent all of someone else's money and then 0:04:55.400 --> 0:04:57.000 still have someone that gives a shit about you at 0:04:57.000 --> 0:04:59.839 the end of the day. Oh my god, you've got 0:05:00.120 --> 0:05:03.880 you respected while you're barfing in the bucket. Yes, and 0:05:04.440 --> 0:05:06.600 someone to hold my hair back, not get pisto off. 0:05:07.279 --> 0:05:10.440 And you also want somebody wait, and you also want 0:05:10.480 --> 0:05:12.359 somebody that's going to assume that you want them to 0:05:12.400 --> 0:05:14.640 call you the next day, even though you're like, hey, 0:05:14.760 --> 0:05:16.520 just take me and my girls out, let's have a 0:05:16.520 --> 0:05:18.960 good time and see you later. Yet you really do 0:05:19.040 --> 0:05:21.719 want that call the next day? Yes, And I don't 0:05:21.720 --> 0:05:23.719 want Yeah, I don't assume that they're going to call it. 0:05:23.720 --> 0:05:29.000 And you can know that they're going to call. Real men, 0:05:29.480 --> 0:05:32.520 Real men can appreciate a woman in her worst time. 0:05:32.800 --> 0:05:34.880 What is there there? There's there's that saying. I always say, 0:05:34.960 --> 0:05:37.440 I always go back to it. If he doesn't deserve 0:05:37.480 --> 0:05:40.200 you at your worst, if he can't accept you at 0:05:40.200 --> 0:05:45.040 your worst, deserve you something that I don't know. If 0:05:45.040 --> 0:05:48.760 he can't, he cannot accep your worst, he doesn't deserve 0:05:48.800 --> 0:05:52.719 you at your best. But you should be able to 0:05:52.720 --> 0:05:56.160 be sloppy ship faced in front of him. And if 0:05:56.200 --> 0:05:59.080 he doesn't, if he doesn't respect you, he's not marriage 0:05:59.120 --> 0:06:01.680 material to begin with, red flag, move on, you've done 0:06:01.680 --> 0:06:04.679 yourself a face. Well, wait a second, though, it's scary. 0:06:04.760 --> 0:06:08.400 I agree, But wait a second. When that's the first meeting, though, 0:06:08.920 --> 0:06:11.520 it might be a little difficult because you're kind of 0:06:11.560 --> 0:06:13.279 starting to get to know each other. So it's almost 0:06:13.320 --> 0:06:15.680 like us because girls are girls are a little judgmental 0:06:15.680 --> 0:06:17.560 on this, right, scary. So let's say you go out 0:06:17.600 --> 0:06:20.240 with somebody and it's the first date or the first meeting, 0:06:20.360 --> 0:06:22.680 right and you're you're with people. Do you primarily go 0:06:22.720 --> 0:06:25.640 out with your girls on these meetings or you alone 0:06:25.720 --> 0:06:29.679 to try to do this m that's a really good point. 0:06:30.240 --> 0:06:31.880 I think the problem is we're meeting a lot of 0:06:31.880 --> 0:06:36.000 these people when we're wasted, so like I can't, like, 0:06:36.080 --> 0:06:38.400 we can't go out and meet them sober and then 0:06:38.520 --> 0:06:42.200 show we're like wasted either, you know, yeah, because who 0:06:42.320 --> 0:06:44.560 is this girl? Like? What planet is she? Froblem right, 0:06:44.560 --> 0:06:46.600 Because although I totally agree with Scary that you should 0:06:46.600 --> 0:06:48.880 be able to show somebody your worst and then they 0:06:48.920 --> 0:06:51.520 still accept you, it's hard when it's a first meeting, 0:06:51.560 --> 0:06:54.680 because first impressions really do count. I've said that a 0:06:54.720 --> 0:06:57.120 hundred times on the show that no matter what you do, 0:06:57.160 --> 0:06:59.479 whether it's just the style that you wear or the 0:06:59.480 --> 0:07:01.479 way that you present yourself and your confident I always 0:07:01.480 --> 0:07:03.400 say girls have to show like that confidence when they 0:07:03.400 --> 0:07:05.720 come in, even if they're a little nervous. But then 0:07:05.800 --> 0:07:09.440 it's like, you cantry, she wants even she wants to 0:07:09.440 --> 0:07:11.480 be able to be herself in front of these dudes. 0:07:11.520 --> 0:07:14.400 And if being herself means you know, tie in one true, 0:07:15.120 --> 0:07:20.640 well getting to the world. Okay, So here's an idea. 0:07:20.880 --> 0:07:23.120 Here's an idea. Maybe you should start out a little 0:07:23.200 --> 0:07:25.760 light for the night, like maybe try something a little new, 0:07:25.840 --> 0:07:28.640 maybe start the early hours. That wine is fine, but 0:07:28.720 --> 0:07:32.440 liquor is quicker. Ideah, pretty much, if you're starting out light, 0:07:32.560 --> 0:07:35.120 then you don't have the balls to talk to them either. No, 0:07:35.320 --> 0:07:37.560 that's where you're gonna do things different. You do have 0:07:37.640 --> 0:07:39.840 the balls to talk to them. You do, you would 0:07:39.840 --> 0:07:42.960 actually do. You are more confident than you realize. You 0:07:43.000 --> 0:07:46.280 don't need the alcohol. That's probably the first thing. You 0:07:46.320 --> 0:07:49.360 guys don't need the alcohol. Actually different muscles like guy, 0:07:50.320 --> 0:07:53.640 because muscles, yea to go up to talk to a guy, 0:07:54.120 --> 0:07:56.320 get beer muscles. Oh, I have been doing that lately. 0:07:56.640 --> 0:07:58.360 I have been doing that lately. My friends have been 0:07:58.400 --> 0:08:00.800 forcing me to do that, and that's time I did well. 0:08:00.800 --> 0:08:03.360 The last two times I did, the one guy warn 0:08:03.560 --> 0:08:05.960 and didn't speak English, so um I had to walk 0:08:05.960 --> 0:08:10.040 away a shame. And then the second time the guy said, oh, 0:08:10.040 --> 0:08:12.200 are you talking to me? Because I'm married, so I'm 0:08:12.240 --> 0:08:15.440 giving Okay, wait a second though, that's not your fault. 0:08:15.520 --> 0:08:18.280 Was he wearing a ring I couldn't see because I 0:08:18.400 --> 0:08:20.880 was wasted? Okay, okay, I get it, I get it. 0:08:20.960 --> 0:08:23.240 All right. Well, here's another thing. Do you have anybody 0:08:23.240 --> 0:08:25.280 in the group that could kind of be like the guider. 0:08:25.600 --> 0:08:27.480 Do you have like one of your girls that's maybe 0:08:27.480 --> 0:08:30.640 like not somebody that parties as much and maybe she 0:08:30.760 --> 0:08:33.280 could be like the designated Hey this week you do 0:08:33.360 --> 0:08:35.400 this or maybe you guys take turns here's an idea. 0:08:35.679 --> 0:08:38.560 You guys go out in groups, maybe somebody could take two. Okay, 0:08:38.679 --> 0:08:40.800 that is a really good idea. She also just likes 0:08:40.840 --> 0:08:43.440 to see us like get shut on, so she uses 0:08:43.480 --> 0:08:47.200 that to her advantage when he's not really a girl 0:08:47.280 --> 0:08:52.160 friends like that. You know, Um, David Brodie just walked in, 0:08:52.200 --> 0:08:56.319 by the way, Hello Brodie, please have a seat and 0:08:56.360 --> 0:08:59.439 hang with us for a while. We're talking to Renee 0:08:59.440 --> 0:09:01.679 on the phone. He's a brand new off airhead and 0:09:01.720 --> 0:09:04.680 she has, by the way, guys, five or six rapid 0:09:04.679 --> 0:09:08.120 fire questions. So that was just one. Yeah, so yeah, 0:09:08.320 --> 0:09:09.960 a couple about a half hour ago, and you told 0:09:09.960 --> 0:09:12.120 me we're gonna talk to through an a. You said 0:09:12.120 --> 0:09:13.640 one of her questions was, and I think I just 0:09:13.679 --> 0:09:16.360 caught the tail end of it, was how can I 0:09:16.400 --> 0:09:18.559 be a train wreck in a bar roughly and then 0:09:18.559 --> 0:09:23.080 find material? No? No No, no, no, no, I'm paraphrasing. I'm paraphrasing. 0:09:23.440 --> 0:09:24.880 You want to get drunk a little bit when a 0:09:24.920 --> 0:09:27.200 party a little bit? Right? What was the exact question 0:09:27.240 --> 0:09:31.240 that you want drunk but also found yourself a marriage material, boyfriend? Exact? 0:09:31.280 --> 0:09:32.840 All right? So here's what I would say is, as 0:09:32.880 --> 0:09:35.400 someone who I am married, and I am MARRIEDE married material. 0:09:38.360 --> 0:09:40.040 It's okay. Well listen, if you want to get married, 0:09:40.040 --> 0:09:42.480 don't be sorry for me. I'm I'm happy. I'm not complaining. 0:09:42.920 --> 0:09:46.680 But here's the thing. If you're sloppy drunk, my thought 0:09:46.840 --> 0:09:49.240 is what kind of marriage material guy is going to 0:09:49.320 --> 0:09:51.880 approach you if you're sloppy drunk because he's looking for 0:09:51.920 --> 0:09:54.360 a girl. He can find his marriage material if you're 0:09:54.400 --> 0:09:59.000 slop but handling his alcohol like I don't know, but 0:09:59.040 --> 0:10:03.640 then he's not looking not wasted. Yeah, but they want 0:10:03.640 --> 0:10:06.240 the same Yeah, but that but that's just it. They 0:10:06.320 --> 0:10:08.920 want the same thing. It's like when you play tennis. 0:10:08.920 --> 0:10:11.200 Everybody wants to play tennis against someone better than them 0:10:11.360 --> 0:10:13.439 so they can get better. But then the other person 0:10:13.480 --> 0:10:15.160 doesn't want to play you because you're not. They want 0:10:15.160 --> 0:10:17.320 to play somebody better. You have to find someone that 0:10:18.000 --> 0:10:20.080 you expect the other person to want different things than 0:10:20.120 --> 0:10:22.120 you want. You expect the other person to handle a 0:10:22.160 --> 0:10:25.199 liquor well, but want someone who doesn't. But they might 0:10:25.240 --> 0:10:32.160 want someone who handles their liquor well, So maybe a corner. Listen, 0:10:35.200 --> 0:10:38.760 you may find someone that drinks the way you do, 0:10:38.880 --> 0:10:41.680 who is marriage material, but you're not going to learn 0:10:41.720 --> 0:10:44.200 that if you're both hammered. You just said you couldn't 0:10:44.200 --> 0:10:46.520 tell if the guy was wearing a ring, So I guess, 0:10:46.679 --> 0:10:48.360 I guess The question is what do you want more? 0:10:48.640 --> 0:10:51.440 Do you want to get hammered every single weekend or 0:10:51.480 --> 0:10:53.320 do you want to or do you want to invest 0:10:53.400 --> 0:10:56.560 one weekend a month to find the right guy? Or 0:10:56.679 --> 0:10:59.080 and also where are you going? Where? What types of 0:10:59.080 --> 0:11:01.760 places are you going? That might also point out why 0:11:01.800 --> 0:11:04.040 you're going to have this trouble. You know, there's different 0:11:04.040 --> 0:11:06.920 places that call different people, so maybe you could like 0:11:07.000 --> 0:11:08.720 team it down a little bit and go to like 0:11:08.840 --> 0:11:11.240 one place where you know there's more of I don't 0:11:11.280 --> 0:11:13.080 know what type of guy are looking for, but let's 0:11:13.080 --> 0:11:15.440 say you're looking for like a business exact that's like 0:11:15.480 --> 0:11:18.600 a young business exactly, you know, might be towards that 0:11:18.640 --> 0:11:20.360 time in his life that he wants to get married. 0:11:20.400 --> 0:11:22.640 Maybe there are certain places people can go you know 0:11:22.760 --> 0:11:25.400 this that there's more of that professional crowd, and then 0:11:25.400 --> 0:11:28.000 there's more the let's just get damn drunk crowd, you know. 0:11:29.440 --> 0:11:31.839 I mean, I guess, So, I mean, okay, I want 0:11:31.880 --> 0:11:35.679 someone that's like borrowing perfect but not too perfect you're 0:11:35.679 --> 0:11:38.120 gonna make you look really bad. So someone that like 0:11:38.200 --> 0:11:41.280 dresses nice, smells nice, doesn't get too wasted, doesn't throw 0:11:41.360 --> 0:11:43.240 up because I have to throw up, has a good job, 0:11:43.800 --> 0:11:46.200 can speed me. It's how to hold your hair back. 0:11:48.600 --> 0:11:50.559 Your hair knows how to pull your hair and hold 0:11:50.600 --> 0:11:53.480 your hair back. I love it. Yeah, you guys get me? 0:11:53.520 --> 0:11:55.760 Why can you be the boys at the bar table 0:11:55.840 --> 0:12:00.720 that one for a while. But I think a guy 0:12:00.800 --> 0:12:04.439 has to get to know you sober before he's gonna 0:12:04.440 --> 0:12:09.000 love you drunk. If but but if I'm gonna want 0:12:09.040 --> 0:12:12.200 to cuddle you and coddle you and take care of 0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:14.880 you and fall in love with you, I want to 0:12:14.920 --> 0:12:16.920 fall in love with you. So if you are the 0:12:16.960 --> 0:12:19.280 drunker all the time, then you're asking someone to fall 0:12:19.280 --> 0:12:21.199 in love with a drunk girl. But if you're asking 0:12:21.520 --> 0:12:22.839 if you're asking for someone to fall in love with 0:12:22.840 --> 0:12:24.960 who you are when you're sober, and then love you 0:12:25.000 --> 0:12:27.160 despite the fact that you're drunk, and get a kick 0:12:27.160 --> 0:12:29.920 out of it and get amused by you, that's fine. 0:12:30.200 --> 0:12:32.560 It's like it's like when you love someone, it doesn't 0:12:32.559 --> 0:12:34.160 matter if they chew with their mouth open or they 0:12:34.160 --> 0:12:37.760 have ugly two tonnails, or whatever that whatever their things are, 0:12:37.800 --> 0:12:39.839 because you already love them, but if you saw their 0:12:39.880 --> 0:12:41.760 tone nails on the first date, you would never fall 0:12:41.800 --> 0:12:43.959 in love with them. So so you need to keep 0:12:44.000 --> 0:12:46.360 your demons in check so he can fall in love 0:12:46.400 --> 0:12:48.760 with you and overlook your demons. Okay, and here's one 0:12:48.840 --> 0:12:52.200 last note. I think you need to challenge yourself. I 0:12:52.240 --> 0:12:54.400 want you to try that's okay. I think you need 0:12:54.440 --> 0:12:56.880 to raise the confidence bar for yourself. I think you 0:12:56.880 --> 0:13:00.199 should really try being sober and see who who you 0:13:00.240 --> 0:13:02.080 are and see if you like who you are going 0:13:02.160 --> 0:13:05.880 up to guys, because you're never gonna know. No, I 0:13:05.920 --> 0:13:08.280 guarantee you're not. You're not. You just need to And 0:13:08.320 --> 0:13:10.240 if you are, wait a second. If you are, there's 0:13:10.240 --> 0:13:12.160 probably a guy out there that's gonna love you for 0:13:12.200 --> 0:13:15.880 That leads into our next question. Sounds a little jealous. 0:13:16.200 --> 0:13:19.320 Here's the question number two from Renee. What do you 0:13:19.400 --> 0:13:22.320 do if you see your boy is liking other girls 0:13:22.320 --> 0:13:27.320 ship on Instagram? Oh the social media drama. So you 0:13:27.400 --> 0:13:31.000 see you're dating a dude, You're going down his Instagram 0:13:31.040 --> 0:13:33.960 feed and you see in your news feed he like 0:13:34.120 --> 0:13:36.520 this person, this person, this person, all these pictures and 0:13:36.559 --> 0:13:39.640 it's all other women. Oh boy, that's a problem, and 0:13:40.280 --> 0:13:42.760 ask him like what if it's his fucking cousin, Like 0:13:42.840 --> 0:13:44.880 I don't know, and then you look crazy like yeah, 0:13:45.040 --> 0:13:47.360 that's why. That's why. Okay, So at the beginning are 0:13:47.360 --> 0:13:52.800 you talking like the beginning when you first start dating somebody? Yeah, okay, fine, right, 0:13:52.840 --> 0:13:55.800 so get right, okay, So here's one thing. Don't look. 0:13:56.320 --> 0:13:58.320 I've tried to explain this to people over and over, 0:13:58.400 --> 0:14:00.760 the stalking idea of no listen, sen to me. I'm 0:14:00.800 --> 0:14:03.319 telling you this. If you look, you're gonna drive yourself 0:14:03.320 --> 0:14:05.400 crazy and you're gonna end up looking like an idiot. 0:14:05.440 --> 0:14:09.280 That's the problem because we people, people will assume, we 0:14:09.280 --> 0:14:11.559 will assume that's what we are. We're creatures of habit. 0:14:11.640 --> 0:14:15.439 We look at things were very we're innately, we're curious. 0:14:15.720 --> 0:14:18.040 Try to cut the curiosity, Try to cut that down 0:14:18.240 --> 0:14:20.960 and not look, because you're gonna put yourself into a hole. 0:14:21.160 --> 0:14:23.840 And chances are that one girl you look at is 0:14:25.120 --> 0:14:29.080 you're gonna look write something stupid. But I will say, 0:14:29.240 --> 0:14:31.880 as time goes on, and I don't think this is bad. 0:14:32.160 --> 0:14:34.400 If you could wait a little bit before you start 0:14:34.440 --> 0:14:37.560 doing that. And it's a real natural progression into you know, 0:14:37.600 --> 0:14:39.680 being around each other and everything, and you see some 0:14:39.760 --> 0:14:42.600 repetition on something. I do think social media does say 0:14:42.600 --> 0:14:44.400 a lot. I think people use it as a screen 0:14:44.440 --> 0:14:46.760 to hide behind what they're doing, and I think that 0:14:46.840 --> 0:14:49.680 it is something people need to recognize. If someone's hitting 0:14:49.720 --> 0:14:52.120 on the same pictures over and over, they're talking. People 0:14:52.160 --> 0:14:54.080 do have relationships online, so you've got to be a 0:14:54.120 --> 0:14:56.280 little careful with that, but keep it to the end. 0:14:58.000 --> 0:15:01.640 A girlfriend, don't be the jealous girlfriend. Cool girlfriends, you know, 0:15:01.800 --> 0:15:05.200 because quite honestly, you know, he could be just randomly 0:15:05.240 --> 0:15:07.640 selecting stuff and just liking stuff to maybe get more 0:15:07.640 --> 0:15:09.600 people to follow him or some stuff like that, so 0:15:09.640 --> 0:15:12.000 you just don't know it's true. I think she's thinking 0:15:12.040 --> 0:15:14.960 more about the repetition of like a single person like 0:15:16.720 --> 0:15:23.400 Instagram model, and what if they're real tists, does that 0:15:23.640 --> 0:15:29.360 change it. I don't have that kind of money. Sharon 0:15:29.360 --> 0:15:31.800 brought up a good point. It could be his cousin, 0:15:31.840 --> 0:15:33.720 it could be a friend, whatever he is. One of 0:15:33.760 --> 0:15:36.200 the things that to take into consideration is he liking 0:15:36.200 --> 0:15:37.840 a picture of a girl by the Eiffel Tower on 0:15:37.880 --> 0:15:39.960 her vacation or is he liking her picture at the 0:15:39.960 --> 0:15:42.960 beach in a bikini or is he is he liking 0:15:42.960 --> 0:15:45.240 a picture that he had to go back and scroll 0:15:45.320 --> 0:15:49.040 seventy posts to find a good one, Because if he's 0:15:49.080 --> 0:15:53.360 going back to see summer and he's liking it, then 0:15:53.360 --> 0:15:56.760 he's trying to get her attention and hoping you don't notice. Yeah, 0:15:57.000 --> 0:16:00.200 you should never like another girl's bikini picture. You like 0:16:00.280 --> 0:16:02.600 her picture with her dog. Oh that's a cute puppy, 0:16:02.880 --> 0:16:04.800 but you should never like look at her blouse. Puppies. 0:16:04.800 --> 0:16:08.160 And that's what that's what they want you to say. Oh, well, chill, 0:16:08.240 --> 0:16:10.000 I like because the puppy was cute, Like you don't 0:16:10.040 --> 0:16:15.200 care about the puppy kind of that's why. But that's 0:16:15.320 --> 0:16:18.240 but that's why she But that's but that's why. Shar 0:16:18.440 --> 0:16:21.920 was right. You can't stalk him on Instagram or Twitter 0:16:22.280 --> 0:16:24.560 what you don't know him. When you know him for 0:16:24.680 --> 0:16:27.080 three months, you will know if he loves dogs. You 0:16:27.120 --> 0:16:28.960 will know if he loves the cup of coffee. He's 0:16:28.960 --> 0:16:31.000 like that girl, I love that coffee mug. You know 0:16:31.000 --> 0:16:33.400 I collect coffee mugs. You'll know more. You'll know more 0:16:33.440 --> 0:16:36.320 about his cousin's a bikini model, and that's the girl 0:16:36.360 --> 0:16:38.360 that he's hitting on because he's just being supported. If 0:16:38.360 --> 0:16:40.200 your cousin's a bikini model, you still shouldn't be like 0:16:40.360 --> 0:16:45.320 the pictures because then it's creepy, creep out their model. 0:16:45.480 --> 0:16:48.320 You call your cousin and you say, it's like my pictures. 0:16:48.520 --> 0:16:52.680 I'm finding out the boys. I'm funny. Girl shouldn't be 0:16:52.680 --> 0:16:54.760 doing I say, your pictures. This is I'm finding out 0:16:54.760 --> 0:16:56.520 the kind of person that Renee is. By the way, 0:16:56.560 --> 0:16:58.920 just from the the questions and the progression of them, 0:16:58.960 --> 0:17:01.320 here comes another fun one from Renee. Renee, you're just 0:17:01.400 --> 0:17:05.679 fully we just have you on us. We have a 0:17:05.680 --> 0:17:07.280 couple more from you, and then we didn't we didn't 0:17:07.280 --> 0:17:09.520 get to our official share nos of the week. But 0:17:10.000 --> 0:17:12.320 how do you here's another question? How do you hook 0:17:12.400 --> 0:17:15.760 up with someone if you live at home? So how 0:17:15.800 --> 0:17:17.920 do you actually remember when I told you, I'm not like, 0:17:18.000 --> 0:17:20.520 I'm really hoping my parents ever hear this. If you're 0:17:21.200 --> 0:17:23.399 if if you're in a house with your family, I 0:17:23.400 --> 0:17:24.800 was gonna the first thing I was gonna say was 0:17:24.840 --> 0:17:26.800 what kind of house is it? You know, if you're 0:17:26.840 --> 0:17:29.919 not if you're not in a separate quarters, if if 0:17:29.960 --> 0:17:33.639 you're if you're in a high ranch or a regular 0:17:33.840 --> 0:17:37.399 traditional home. I think you're limiting what you can do 0:17:37.560 --> 0:17:39.560 because you're talking the bedrooms are probably all on the 0:17:39.600 --> 0:17:42.160 same floor, and there's people around you all the time. 0:17:42.200 --> 0:17:44.240 I used to come home at like night, like late 0:17:44.320 --> 0:17:46.119 night with I used to live at home until I 0:17:46.160 --> 0:17:48.960 was like twenty four, and I used to show up 0:17:49.480 --> 0:17:51.800 around I used to go out around nine or ten, 0:17:52.000 --> 0:17:54.239 knowing my parents went to bed at eleven, and then 0:17:54.280 --> 0:17:56.520 I'd hang out and then run around midnight. I'd come 0:17:56.560 --> 0:17:58.600 back and I would use the living room downstairs. You 0:17:58.680 --> 0:18:02.160 got to use use that floor. I guess you could 0:18:02.200 --> 0:18:03.879 do that. I mean, so I did the typical like 0:18:04.119 --> 0:18:06.320 post grad thing, and I just forced my parents to 0:18:06.359 --> 0:18:11.280 give me the basement and I redid it. Okay, so easy, okay, 0:18:11.359 --> 0:18:13.800 but you have to hear the problem. So the only 0:18:13.800 --> 0:18:16.880 way in and out to go down there, there's no door. 0:18:16.960 --> 0:18:19.520 You have to use the garage, which literally makes so 0:18:19.600 --> 0:18:23.200 much noise. And I knew you were going to say 0:18:23.240 --> 0:18:27.120 that how to open the garage door at seven am? 0:18:27.119 --> 0:18:28.920 And I'm like, well, how to let my friend go home? 0:18:28.960 --> 0:18:33.960 Like so the only way al is through the garage. Mh, Like, 0:18:33.960 --> 0:18:37.159 I'm not kidding enough to fit through the here's a 0:18:37.160 --> 0:18:39.760 little trick for you. There's a release on the garage 0:18:39.800 --> 0:18:42.600 door where you can lift it manually and it won't 0:18:42.600 --> 0:18:44.680 make any noise. And if you're going out with a 0:18:44.720 --> 0:18:46.720 plan to bring him home and you don't and you 0:18:46.760 --> 0:18:49.320 think the house is secure, no one's gonna notice unlocked 0:18:49.359 --> 0:18:51.480 the latch inside before you leave, so you can open 0:18:51.480 --> 0:18:55.399 it manually outside. Yeah, you're welcome. Now. However, do you 0:18:55.400 --> 0:18:58.040 have an alarm on the house? Yeah, but no one 0:18:58.080 --> 0:19:00.720 puts it on, so there's no tiger. There's no dinger 0:19:00.760 --> 0:19:02.720 that goes off as you walk in and out. There's 0:19:02.720 --> 0:19:09.439 something like that. Okay, you know, the only thing is 0:19:09.440 --> 0:19:11.280 is that you know the fact that you're living at 0:19:11.320 --> 0:19:13.480 home isn't really the problem. There's a lot of people 0:19:13.520 --> 0:19:16.199 that go back home nowadays and stay until they want to, like, 0:19:16.400 --> 0:19:18.639 you know, revamp their careers or do this or do that. 0:19:18.880 --> 0:19:22.200 So if you're actually at home, is there any way 0:19:22.200 --> 0:19:25.359 that you could kind of have this like relationship with 0:19:25.400 --> 0:19:27.440 your family where you're like, hey, it's not that you're 0:19:27.480 --> 0:19:29.399 like bringing somebody into bang them. I mean, they're not 0:19:29.400 --> 0:19:31.639 going to go for that. But I think that the 0:19:31.680 --> 0:19:34.040 idea would be that Hey, listen, I'm maybe in and out. 0:19:34.440 --> 0:19:36.960 I maybe you know, I'm doing my own thing, yes, 0:19:38.560 --> 0:19:40.119