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Speaker 1: Yeah, I want to be very delicate about what I'm

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Speaker 1: going to say because it's a it's a sensitive topic,

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Speaker 1: and I don't believe in just saying negative things that

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Speaker 1: can hurt people's feelings. Words, the written word hurts, the

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Speaker 1: verbal word hurts people's actions, and words hurt people's feelings.

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Speaker 1: I've learned that, and I teach that to my daughter too.

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Speaker 1: So I want to be sensitive and accountable when I

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Speaker 1: speak about plastic surgery. Because I watched like ten minutes

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Speaker 1: of the and just like that, the the Sex and

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Speaker 1: the City follow up show last night, I wanted to

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Speaker 1: get to the Peloton part. I was more interested in

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Speaker 1: it because of the Peloton situation with their stock And

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Speaker 1: I don't know those of you who don't know, HBO

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Speaker 1: Max aired and just like that, and there's a scene

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Speaker 1: and I guess I didn't get up to it, but

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Speaker 1: I guess big passes away on a Peloton, and Peloton

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Speaker 1: reacted with this commercial within forty eight hours after their

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Speaker 1: stock plummeted and the stock went back up, and it

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Speaker 1: just was, in my opinion, and interesting pivot. And people

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Speaker 1: were reading about it and saying that they were rethinking

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Speaker 1: a Peloton, and I don't know how a scripted scene

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Speaker 1: and a show is going to make you rethink exercise equipment,

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Speaker 1: but who knows. So I because of being on the

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Speaker 1: Housewives and watching these shows and seeing women with plastic

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Speaker 1: surgery and their faces change and everybody be very vain,

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Speaker 1: and watching women age. I mean, I think I started

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Speaker 1: The Housewives in my mid thirties, and I think Ramona

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Speaker 1: was maybe fifty then you know, it was fifteen years ago,

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Speaker 1: so we're all older, and we look older because we

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Speaker 1: are older. And you see some people have good plastic

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Speaker 1: surgery and botox and some have bad on the Housewives,

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Speaker 1: and it's a great place to look at different plastic

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Speaker 1: surgeries from breasts too, butts, two cheeks, to teeth, a

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Speaker 1: lot of teeth done. Knows is extensions, hair, all of it.

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's just a good place to see sort

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Speaker 1: of stuff. So I want to sensitively discuss plastic surgery

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Speaker 1: because I was watching Sex in the City now. I

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Speaker 1: don't remember the last time that show was on, but

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Speaker 1: the women are much older. Um. I think someone was

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Speaker 1: saying that they were fifty five years old, so that

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Speaker 1: it was a major iconic show for women in their

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Speaker 1: thirties and I think, and Samantha was maybe win forties

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Speaker 1: and maybe into our fifties, I don't quote me. But

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Speaker 1: so coming back for them to come back and do

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Speaker 1: the show obviously takes emotional courage because you know you're

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Speaker 1: going to be judged on the way that you look.

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Speaker 1: And I know that they have UM and you're coming

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Speaker 1: back to a show and you've gotten older and you're

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Speaker 1: vain and everything is about being in magazines and pictures

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Speaker 1: and every once filtered and it's you know, everything's HD. Now.

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Speaker 1: When I went on television, there was no Instagram and

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Speaker 1: there was no HD. Uh So that's high def television.

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Speaker 1: So I know that these women have to go back

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Speaker 1: back and they're going to think about how they're going

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Speaker 1: to look. And I know in a lot of the

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Speaker 1: press over the pandemic, Sarah Jessica Parker was just fully gray,

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Speaker 1: which I get and so as I and so my

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Speaker 1: most of the time. And I don't know exactly what

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Speaker 1: she does or what anyone does, but I know in

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Speaker 1: watching the show, and I don't want to be specific

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Speaker 1: about anyone, and I don't want to go into any

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Speaker 1: great detail. Uh. In watching the show, I was affected

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Speaker 1: by the plastic surgery. I'm over fifty. I saw the

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Speaker 1: plastic surgery. I could see the difference in the faces

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Speaker 1: on the show. I saw the expressions different. Uh. It

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Speaker 1: just plastic surgery makes your face look different. And it's

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Speaker 1: not that it's quote unquote bad. It's just some people

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Speaker 1: that I know, not on television, have gotten plastic surgery

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Speaker 1: and their faces if you just look directly at their faces,

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Speaker 1: they look good, but the person themselves looks older, or

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Speaker 1: they look good, but they just look a little stranger.

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Speaker 1: Or when they smile it seems unusual, or when they

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Speaker 1: talk it doesn't sound the same, like it's very different.

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Speaker 1: And on that show, it was very loud. To me,

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Speaker 1: I was actually distracted by it, and I know a

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Speaker 1: lot of you were too. And this is not to

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Speaker 1: say something negative. It's to talk about plastic surgery. So

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Speaker 1: for me personally, you know, every time I post a

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Speaker 1: post and I happen to look good, Um, I don't filter.

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Speaker 1: If I do filter, I would say it. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I would say, this is not what I look like.

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Speaker 1: And you see a lot of my unfiltered bag and

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Speaker 1: wrinkled pictures. Um, I have had botox. I haven't had

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Speaker 1: it in a while. And I have had philer probably

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Speaker 1: once or twice in my whole entire life. Um, because

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Speaker 1: when I got my jaw, my botox and my jaw

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Speaker 1: which took my jaw muscle literally probably half the size.

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Speaker 1: I had been working. I've grinded for years and I

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Speaker 1: have a night guard, but that muscle had grown from

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Speaker 1: when I was a child to an adult. It was

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Speaker 1: like doing bicep curls on my jaw for years. So

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Speaker 1: when I gradually used botox to reduce it, it was

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Speaker 1: so sort of almost collapsed that one doctor said that

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Speaker 1: I should balance it out by putting a dot on

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Speaker 1: each cheek because it was just it was not balanced.

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Speaker 1: I guess something by by that reducing pull my face

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Speaker 1: that I don't know. Anyway, I uh, it scares me

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Speaker 1: the filler a little bit because I see people looking

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Speaker 1: so crazy. Has nothing to do with the fact that

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Speaker 1: I'm so own natural and should be living in a

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Speaker 1: commune or anything like that. I just don't think it

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Speaker 1: looks great and it looks obvious. But and I have

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Speaker 1: not had plastic surgery. I had a breast lift, I

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Speaker 1: have not had my nose don I have not had

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Speaker 1: plastic surgery. I sweared everything I hope to be. I

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Speaker 1: swear on anything that I love. I have not had

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Speaker 1: plastic surgery. I have considered what I would do if

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Speaker 1: I were to do it, because I've had other people

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Speaker 1: who are in the entertainment industry tell me that everyone

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Speaker 1: has done it and they're all lying, and I'm the

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Speaker 1: only one who hasn't done anything. So that's when you

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Speaker 1: start to think, as no one telling me that I

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Speaker 1: need something, like, am I do I need something? And

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Speaker 1: no one's telling me. No one's going I've never told

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Speaker 1: anyone they need something. Uh. I've had two good friends

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Speaker 1: have surgery, and um, I notice it. My daughter noticed it. Um.

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Speaker 1: Whenever I introduced my fiance to someone who's had plastic surgery,

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Speaker 1: he says to me, did they have something done? And

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Speaker 1: he thinks it looks different. I'm trying to be kind

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Speaker 1: in general to everybody. So it's a choice. But I

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Speaker 1: do think there's a price. And I don't know what

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Speaker 1: age or what circumstance you hit where you really have

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Speaker 1: to do it, you really should do it. So I

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Speaker 1: think there's a lot of pressure sure to get plastic

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Speaker 1: surgery because you don't want to be the one holding

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Speaker 1: the bag. The last woman standing that hasn't had it.

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Speaker 1: But I want to tell you that watching Sex in

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Speaker 1: the City, uh, and just like that made me think,

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Speaker 1: I think I would rather look a little older and

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Speaker 1: not have plastic surgery for now. I mean, someone has

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Speaker 1: to tell me that there's something to do. But it

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Speaker 1: feels like a crapshoot because there are people on the

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Speaker 1: Housewives who have had plastic surgery and they're teeth done

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Speaker 1: and it looks good, and then there are other people

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Speaker 1: and they look like they're on Star Trek and there's

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Speaker 1: everything in between. And I don't think that that's a

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Speaker 1: risk that I would take. I think it's scary. So

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Speaker 1: unless you really really need something, and what's the definition

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Speaker 1: of need, you it's interfering with your life. You look

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Speaker 1: into the mirror and you say, I see this saggy neck.

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Speaker 1: I can see exactly where it's gapping on my neck,

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Speaker 1: or my eyes. I have big suitcases under my eye

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Speaker 1: is and there's that wrinkly skin, or I just look

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Speaker 1: like a leather bag and I have crow's feet because listen,

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Speaker 1: I don't drink enough water. I don't exercise a lot,

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Speaker 1: I mean barely at all. I don't sleep enough so

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Speaker 1: that gets in your head and you're thinking I must

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Speaker 1: be aging and need it, and I'm sure you're all

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Speaker 1: thinking the same thing. I just want to tell you

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Speaker 1: that the people, for the most part that I know

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Speaker 1: who have had plastic surgery don't look natural, and it's

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Speaker 1: a little off putting to me. So maybe just a

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Speaker 1: little bit of crow's feet and not looking perfect is

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Speaker 1: the answer for more than just myself some good makeup

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Speaker 1: on a good night out. Most of the time, you're

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Speaker 1: probably home with your kids in your pajamas, so it

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Speaker 1: doesn't always have to matter as long as you can

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Speaker 1: pull it together when you need to take a great picture,

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Speaker 1: go out to a good dinner, go on a vacation.

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Speaker 1: What are we all doing it for? So I hope

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Speaker 1: that you all comment and tell me what I need

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Speaker 1: and when I need it, if I need it, or

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Speaker 1: tell me honestly that I don't, because I think we

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Speaker 1: have to tell each other all of that so we

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Speaker 1: don't have to go through not knowing and then be

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Speaker 1: a person that everyone's talking about saying, wow, that looks

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Speaker 1: weird and she didn't need it and why did she

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Speaker 1: do that? And you know, because I felt a little

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Speaker 1: strange watching unjust like that, and I felt a little

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Speaker 1: uncomfortable about it, and it made me worry about the

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Speaker 1: fact that I've thought about doing it. So that's my

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Speaker 1: truth about plastic surgery. My guest today is radio personality

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Speaker 1: Elvis Duran. He is a wonderful man. He is very talented.

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Speaker 1: His show, Elvis Duran and the Morning Show has been

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Speaker 1: running since on New York's biggest station and syndicated across

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Speaker 1: the country. In a career that spans decades, he's won

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Speaker 1: countless awards and was inducted into the National Radio Hall

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Speaker 1: of Fame. He's not only incredibly accomplished, but he's a

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Speaker 1: wonderful philanthropist who's donated to be strong on many occasions.

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Speaker 1: Every day, millions of people tune into his show, and

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Speaker 1: today we get to hear his story. Enjoy Alright. So, Elvis,

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Speaker 1: so I know you because throughout the years I've come

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Speaker 1: in and been interviewed by you since probably you didn't

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Speaker 1: even know who I was through my books and my experiences,

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Speaker 1: and I've always enjoyed coming in there and your humor

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Speaker 1: and you're being real, and we've developed this uh sort

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Speaker 1: of industry relationship that's a little bit more Um, and

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Speaker 1: you've helped me with be strong without wanting any credit,

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Speaker 1: which I've mentioned. Um my daughter met you on the

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Speaker 1: eating outside with some friends, and um, I just saw

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Speaker 1: one of your colleagues at jingle ball, so we know

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Speaker 1: each other. Um, but I don't really know you. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I don't know most of the people that I interview,

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Speaker 1: even if I really know them, even if I'm friendly

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Speaker 1: with them, because we don't really talk about how someone

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Speaker 1: came up specifically, we sort of meet them once they're here.

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Speaker 1: So how did you come up? Where did you grow up?

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Speaker 1: And what did you want to be and what did

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Speaker 1: you think successment and what was your family like? Well,

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Speaker 1: I wanted to be a ballerina. That didn't work out,

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Speaker 1: you know. I I was seduced by radio at a

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Speaker 1: very early age. And I say that because I was

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Speaker 1: such a loner kid, and you know, I spent a

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Speaker 1: lot of time just with me and the radio and

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Speaker 1: the people who were playing the songs and giving away

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Speaker 1: the contest prizes, and I don't know, I felt that

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Speaker 1: they were friends. They were in a weird way, disconnected way,

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Speaker 1: they were friends of mine. And I always thought, I

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Speaker 1: want to do that. I'm wanna I'm wanna be that

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Speaker 1: voice in the in the night or in the morning

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Speaker 1: that's actually a friendly voice when people may need it.

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Speaker 1: And because I needed it as a kid, I was,

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Speaker 1: like I said, I was a loner, and I was

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Speaker 1: I wasn't like out of my mind and and hated.

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Speaker 1: I just very introverted. Before we knew what that meant,

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Speaker 1: you know, so well, interesting radio was my best friend.

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Speaker 1: And I now we see it applied to people's lives

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Speaker 1: who are living awful lives at home, or they're driving

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Speaker 1: every morning to a shitty job that they just can't

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Speaker 1: stand with a boss that's toxic, and we want to

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Speaker 1: be there as a friend. And it's a very simple concept,

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Speaker 1: but that's what got me hooked at a very early age.

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Speaker 1: It's very unique for someone to really live out their

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Speaker 1: dream that they had as a child. I don't know

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Speaker 1: that many people who really have done that. What did

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Speaker 1: your family think about that? And I love that point.

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Speaker 1: Let's come back to that dream. The dream is a

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Speaker 1: child thing. My mom and dad were like, you know,

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Speaker 1: you need to go to college. So they foot the

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Speaker 1: bill and I went to college and I just wasn't

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Speaker 1: a great student. I was a great college partier. I

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Speaker 1: just it just wasn't for me, you know, But radio

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Speaker 1: always pulled me back. So I was doing part time

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Speaker 1: radio in Dallas while I was going to college and

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Speaker 1: failing miserably in college, and so this was the path.

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Speaker 1: And so, yeah, you have a dream as a kid.

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Speaker 1: I mean, do you remember dreaming anything when you were

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Speaker 1: a kid, like I want to be this when I

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Speaker 1: grow up? Yeah? I do. I think I wanted to

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Speaker 1: be an actress, but more about probably what I thought

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Speaker 1: the adoration. I mean, I don't think I understood what

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Speaker 1: acting really was and the technicalities of it and what

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Speaker 1: it really meant. And I tried it. I just knew

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Speaker 1: that I wanted to. I I loved comedy. I did

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Speaker 1: the Groundlings years later and Second City. I tried all

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Speaker 1: of that. I always wanted to be in place. I

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Speaker 1: wanted to entertain and connect in a humorous way. But

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Speaker 1: I wanted to be myself. I knew that. So it

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Speaker 1: is similar, but it wasn't as young, uh and as

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Speaker 1: specific as you're talking about. But I did always have

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Speaker 1: this urge to connect to an audience. But it's funny

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Speaker 1: how as we get older and more embroiled in our career,

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Speaker 1: as we realized how specific that can be. Meaning I've

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Speaker 1: liked reality television. Not until after years doing it did

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Speaker 1: I realized it was because of that humorous, irreverent, unbridled

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Speaker 1: connection with that audience. It wasn't because I wanted to

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Speaker 1: be famous. It wasn't because I wanted to be on

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Speaker 1: reality TV or the money necessarily, although that was good.

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Speaker 1: It was that I like that connection. So the podcast,

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Speaker 1: I didn't even know what that was, and now I

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Speaker 1: know that it's a great way to just communicate and

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Speaker 1: express you See, Bethany, you just used the word connect

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Speaker 1: in one form or another over a dozen times, and

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Speaker 1: I really think that's very telling of you and of me.

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Speaker 1: I was a little awkward growing up, and even in

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Speaker 1: college I had a few friends, but it was still

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Speaker 1: an awkward time and I was outdating whatever, and I

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Speaker 1: wasn't good at any of that. But the need to

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Speaker 1: connect was there. So I found through our delivery of

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Speaker 1: content through one way radio, I could make a connection,

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Speaker 1: but it was it was an indirect connection. I was

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Speaker 1: there talking to you, and then the feedback was much

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Speaker 1: slower because was no social media. But the need to connect,

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Speaker 1: I think we all have that in one form or

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Speaker 1: another like you so brilliantly said, it's so true because

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Speaker 1: you don't have to be talking to someone else. I

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Speaker 1: will talk sometimes, just on a rant, and I was

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Speaker 1: shocked that you're just speaking, and you are. You are

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Speaker 1: talking to people, but they're not necessarily talking back. We

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Speaker 1: do like that as well, and I know that you

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Speaker 1: do too, but it's a different type of thing. It's

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Speaker 1: sort of like a you're just expressing yourself through monologue,

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Speaker 1: which is interesting. Yeah, you know, it also kind of

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Speaker 1: started and became very important for me. Uh nine eleven,

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Speaker 1: twenty years ago, I was about to quit radio. I

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Speaker 1: just didn't understand the point. I didn't feel like I

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Speaker 1: was saving any lives. We weren't curing any diseases. We

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Speaker 1: I didn't get it. You know, maybe you'll tell a

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Speaker 1: fart joke here and play the same song over and

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Speaker 1: over until people don't want to hear anymore. What's the

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Speaker 1: point in that? I was lost? I was floating around

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Speaker 1: and outer space, not really tethered to anything I felt

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Speaker 1: was foundationally important. But were you getting a w with it? Oh? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: lots of lots of ratings, lots of listeners, great money.

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Speaker 1: I didn't get it. Nine eleven, actually nine twelve and

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Speaker 1: two thousand one proved to me, well, what what we're

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Speaker 1: here for? The calling was for me at that time,

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Speaker 1: it was healing, it was anger, it was you know,

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Speaker 1: all the emotions we all went through after nine eleven,

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Speaker 1: right putting the pieces together for people I'll never get

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Speaker 1: Walking in the studio on November, I mean September twelve,

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Speaker 1: we didn't know what to do, like, who the who

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Speaker 1: the hell are we to like open the microphones and

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Speaker 1: start talking after such a tragic, tragic event, unfriendly right

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Speaker 1: before our eyes, literally before our eyes. What we discovered,

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Speaker 1: who we were, we were needed. We helped get food

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Speaker 1: down to ground zero. We helped get little baby booties

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Speaker 1: for the dogs who were searching. We we connected families

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Speaker 1: who were members of families were walking down the turnpike

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Speaker 1: just trying to get home near Philly from New York.

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Speaker 1: We had people stopping by and picking them up. And

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Speaker 1: we understood at that point what public's service is all about,

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Speaker 1: which connects way way fast forward to what you are

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Speaker 1: doing now. Every time there's a call, you're there. You

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Speaker 1: feel the need to serve the public, And I think

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Speaker 1: there's a connection between what we learned after nine eleven

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Speaker 1: and our business radio how important it was and how

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Speaker 1: you are connecting the Dodge to help people out around

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Speaker 1: the world. Well, it's funny. You can find your way

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Speaker 1: in and then you feel like you have purpose and

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Speaker 1: it gives you something to do, and it's sort of

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Speaker 1: like work. Also, relief work is work, um, which just

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Speaker 1: feels weird sometimes because it can be cold. I'm just

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Speaker 1: trying to get things done. I'm not just crying and

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Speaker 1: hugging babies. So I feel like it's not what it

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Speaker 1: is on TV or in the movies or you know

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Speaker 1: what I'm saying. You connect to people and you got

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Speaker 1: I'm using that word again, but you go there and

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Speaker 1: you see people are going through but it's it's handled

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Speaker 1: in a way where you just need to move quickly

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Speaker 1: to help versus really processing what's going on. You don't

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Speaker 1: always have time to do that. So it sounds like

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Speaker 1: it was a day after It was September twelfth, and

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Speaker 1: you were just in motion helping people. I fell in

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Speaker 1: love with my career that day. Refell in love. I

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Speaker 1: understood the importance. And then when we try to figure

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Speaker 1: out which I don't know why we do this to ourselves,

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Speaker 1: but I do this, and I'm hoping you've thought it

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Speaker 1: through to what's the psychology behind wanting to be there?

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Speaker 1: What's the psychology other than purpose, as you mentioned, which

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Speaker 1: is so important, like what what's what's in it for me?

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Speaker 1: And I know that sounds very trite and very whatever,

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Speaker 1: but there is something in it for us. There is

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Speaker 1: the satisfaction of helping people. We have the platforms to

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Speaker 1: do it. It's too easy to not do it. It's

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Speaker 1: not easy to do, Don't get me wrong. It's not

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Speaker 1: easy to execute what we do. But it's too right

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Speaker 1: there that you have a leg up to do it

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Speaker 1: that someone else doesn't have. And most people do want

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Speaker 1: to help. Thank god, we do because there are a

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Speaker 1: lot of There are a lot of people who benefit

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Speaker 1: from it. And I know I do, but I watched,

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Speaker 1: I watched. I'm always trolling you online. I'm watching every

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Speaker 1: time every time of building falls. Bethany's there, you know,

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Speaker 1: and uh, I love it. I think, I think when

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Speaker 1: you talk about leaving legacy, I'm sure that you've had

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Speaker 1: this conversation with yourself. What's that legacy you want to

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Speaker 1: leave your Well, you're creating quite the legacy. Well that

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Speaker 1: may be a plan that we didn't know about. Why

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Speaker 1: that was given to certain people. I mean, not everybody

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Speaker 1: uses it that way, but I'll say that the it's

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Speaker 1: funny you said why you felt you had to be there.

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Speaker 1: So I was a nobody who had absolutely nothing, living

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Speaker 1: in a tiny, tiny studio apartment, and sixty two Street

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Speaker 1: and nine eleven felt so far from me. It was

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Speaker 1: I didn't understand like that you could have access. It

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Speaker 1: was downtown. I was on sixty second Street. Think about

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Speaker 1: what I do now and how crazy the dangerous places

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Speaker 1: I've been and how we get in immediately with no

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Speaker 1: red tape, and it's scary, and there's people who intervene

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Speaker 1: with aid and kill and roadblocks and crazy stuff going

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Speaker 1: on in different countries. For people listening, you can get involved.

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Speaker 1: It just seems like you can. It seems like everything

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Speaker 1: else that you don't take a chance to do, Like Loto,

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Speaker 1: you have to be in it to win it. The Apprentice,

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Speaker 1: you have to send that tape, even though they say

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Speaker 1: thousands are doing it. Whatever it is superficially the Housewives,

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Speaker 1: a radio host, whatever. But I was on sixty two Street,

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Speaker 1: and my biggest regret in my life is that I

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Speaker 1: didn't go down there to see it, to feel it.

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Speaker 1: Not even that I could have made a massive help

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Speaker 1: impact helping. Maybe I could, maybe I couldn't, but just

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Speaker 1: so I could know in my body what that really

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Speaker 1: felt like. I only know as a bystander in New York.

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Speaker 1: Like everyone else, I didn't really absorb what you did

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Speaker 1: and what really was going on down there. Well, we

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Speaker 1: were forced, and we were our students at the time.

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Speaker 1: We're in Jersey City in a high rise. Look, I

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Speaker 1: mean looking right at World Trade. We watched the whole

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Speaker 1: thing happened, so we were sort of sucked in. And

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Speaker 1: also a lot of supplies were launched from the docks

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Speaker 1: below our building, and so we had we we were well, no,

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Speaker 1: we weren't forced, but we forced ourselves to be a

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Speaker 1: part it. We had to. But it just Yeah, because

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Speaker 1: of your slightly disappointing thoughts in not being able to

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Speaker 1: go downtown, which you weren't allowed to do, by the way,

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Speaker 1: most likely for a while, is that sort of what

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Speaker 1: sprang you into action in the future as you're doing today.

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Speaker 1: Not even no, I just years later. I always wanted

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Speaker 1: to do something in philanthropy, and I would donate money

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Speaker 1: to different charities, not realizing if you focus on one,

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Speaker 1: you can really have an impact. When I used to

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Speaker 1: think it was good to give to different places, but

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Speaker 1: I didn't understand what it meant, and then donating to

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Speaker 1: being involved with one, it just didn't feel dire enough.

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Speaker 1: The way that I was doing it. It It was too

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Speaker 1: slow and low. It was helpful to a lot of women,

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Speaker 1: but I wanted to do something immediate, and years ago

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Speaker 1: I saw Haiti earthquake and I saw the kids on

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Speaker 1: the medical lines, and I always wanted to do something

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Speaker 1: with babies. So when I was able to finally do

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Speaker 1: it for her came Maria, I understood the point and

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Speaker 1: that it's just like you can you just hear something,

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Speaker 1: you see images, people tell Twitter, social media and Instagram

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Speaker 1: helps so much. But anyway, who that that's so both

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Speaker 1: of us have connected through philanthropy. You've got involved and

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Speaker 1: would be strong. Um, so what about your relationships? What

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Speaker 1: about sexuality relationships? What about that while trying to build

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Speaker 1: a career that makes you the center of attention and

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Speaker 1: really now you're more leveled and where you know you've

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Speaker 1: made it, But when trying to come up, what about

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Speaker 1: all of those elements in your life. You know what,

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Speaker 1: the word relationships is a very important word in my

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Speaker 1: life and in our shows foundation as well, because I

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Speaker 1: think everyone's storylines in their relationships with people, relationships with food,

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Speaker 1: with money, with alcohol, with drugs, with sex, with It's

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Speaker 1: all how we relay. It's not just what we think

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Speaker 1: about what I think about my husband Alex. I I

429
00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:38,040
Speaker 1: also want to make it about what he thinks about me,

430
00:22:38,359 --> 00:22:41,520
Speaker 1: like how are we in this together as partners? And uh,

431
00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:46,120
Speaker 1: I think looking through the relationship lens is so important

432
00:22:46,119 --> 00:22:48,000
Speaker 1: because it's not it's not a one way think. This

433
00:22:48,119 --> 00:22:50,439
Speaker 1: is not a one way life. We're living with money

434
00:22:50,600 --> 00:22:54,080
Speaker 1: and with power or lack of power or can't pay

435
00:22:54,119 --> 00:22:57,199
Speaker 1: the bills. Relationships married to Alex. I don't know this

436
00:22:57,400 --> 00:23:00,879
Speaker 1: is it? Is it? The simple? Is this what you want? Yeah?

437
00:23:01,119 --> 00:23:03,440
Speaker 1: We met each other twelve years ago and we got

438
00:23:03,480 --> 00:23:06,600
Speaker 1: married either two or three years ago. I lost a

439
00:23:06,680 --> 00:23:08,520
Speaker 1: year and there somewhere I think you know what I'm doing. Well.

440
00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:11,320
Speaker 1: You waited a long time, We did well. It was

441
00:23:11,400 --> 00:23:13,600
Speaker 1: kind off and on again. We weren't really ready for it.

442
00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:16,679
Speaker 1: He used to be a club kid who was getting older,

443
00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:18,760
Speaker 1: and I was an old guy who needed to become

444
00:23:18,760 --> 00:23:21,200
Speaker 1: a club kid again. So it was it was kind

445
00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:23,560
Speaker 1: of a young thing and it worked out really beautifully.

446
00:23:23,560 --> 00:23:26,040
Speaker 1: And now we're you know, we have two schnauzers and

447
00:23:26,119 --> 00:23:28,600
Speaker 1: live on a farm and in the city and we're

448
00:23:28,600 --> 00:23:31,000
Speaker 1: doing our thing. So are you good at it? I'm

449
00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:34,679
Speaker 1: trying to be it's work, you know, hello, it is,

450
00:23:34,720 --> 00:23:37,359
Speaker 1: but I don't not everyone admits that. And you watch

451
00:23:37,480 --> 00:23:39,879
Speaker 1: you know, it doesn't matter what television show you're watching.

452
00:23:39,920 --> 00:23:41,760
Speaker 1: There are people with twelve year old kids walk in

453
00:23:42,160 --> 00:23:44,560
Speaker 1: just giving the biggest hug and the day I met

454
00:23:44,600 --> 00:23:46,760
Speaker 1: your mother and I and I'm like, is that that?

455
00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:48,840
Speaker 1: I don't think that's what relationships are like every day

456
00:23:48,880 --> 00:23:50,720
Speaker 1: because none of my friends, it's like that they're all

457
00:23:51,119 --> 00:23:53,280
Speaker 1: we're you know, one of them it's not stopped snoring,

458
00:23:53,359 --> 00:23:56,199
Speaker 1: and the husband drinks too much. Another one, uh, the

459
00:23:56,320 --> 00:23:59,600
Speaker 1: husbands to overweight and also drinks too much and smokes.

460
00:23:59,600 --> 00:24:02,040
Speaker 1: And see, like all my friends have different stuff going

461
00:24:02,040 --> 00:24:04,440
Speaker 1: out their partners. So I like when people tell its

462
00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:07,160
Speaker 1: straight versus bullshit, it just doesn't help people. Well, okay,

463
00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:09,480
Speaker 1: I'll tell you straight. You pretty much three out of

464
00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:12,280
Speaker 1: four in bed to overweight guys with drinking problems and

465
00:24:12,359 --> 00:24:15,359
Speaker 1: snoring you you pretty the nail on the head. Look,

466
00:24:15,359 --> 00:24:17,680
Speaker 1: you know what, I look at it this way, and

467
00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:20,359
Speaker 1: I think this helps me with this relationship. We're struggling

468
00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:22,720
Speaker 1: up to the point where we finally decided to get married.

469
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:24,800
Speaker 1: You know, you realize you're in two different lanes, and

470
00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:26,040
Speaker 1: sometimes you're in the same way, and you're in two

471
00:24:26,080 --> 00:24:27,960
Speaker 1: different lanes, and but you're always merging in and out

472
00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,280
Speaker 1: of each other's traffic and exiting and entering the free

473
00:24:30,320 --> 00:24:35,399
Speaker 1: win everything. Not every day is great, I do I

474
00:24:35,400 --> 00:24:38,399
Speaker 1: I can't think the last time we actually went for

475
00:24:38,480 --> 00:24:41,800
Speaker 1: each other's freaking juggular and tried to rip them out.

476
00:24:41,840 --> 00:24:44,360
Speaker 1: I mean, we're doing okay. I guess that's a good

477
00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:47,920
Speaker 1: sign um now. But you know what we're doing now,

478
00:24:48,359 --> 00:24:51,520
Speaker 1: and I think this is this is not uncommon after

479
00:24:51,680 --> 00:24:54,200
Speaker 1: you know, the COVID hit. We're reevaluating. We're trying to

480
00:24:54,240 --> 00:24:57,200
Speaker 1: figure out where this is going, uh not the relationship.

481
00:24:57,280 --> 00:24:58,840
Speaker 1: We want to be back to, back in the woods,

482
00:24:58,880 --> 00:25:02,360
Speaker 1: protecting each other, and that's that's easy to figure out.

483
00:25:02,359 --> 00:25:04,480
Speaker 1: But where do we want to go next? What's next chapter?

484
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:07,240
Speaker 1: You know, I love what I do for a living.

485
00:25:07,280 --> 00:25:09,080
Speaker 1: Alex loves what he does for living, which is the

486
00:25:09,080 --> 00:25:12,280
Speaker 1: polar opposite of what I do. You know he works

487
00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:16,080
Speaker 1: at Stadi want to Zoo. He's a zookeeper. Amazing. Okay,

488
00:25:16,080 --> 00:25:18,879
Speaker 1: we have nothing in common in professional world, which is

489
00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:23,160
Speaker 1: kind of great. Oh no, very great. You know he'll

490
00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:25,359
Speaker 1: he'll go to work and you know, help build a

491
00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:29,359
Speaker 1: new sloth exhibit. I go to work and interview SpongeBob SquarePants.

492
00:25:29,359 --> 00:25:33,320
Speaker 1: I mean, they're just not related. But you know, we're

493
00:25:33,359 --> 00:25:36,240
Speaker 1: trying to figure out what's next, what's next chapter? I

494
00:25:36,280 --> 00:25:38,080
Speaker 1: love what I do for a living, I just don't

495
00:25:38,119 --> 00:25:41,800
Speaker 1: always love how I'm doing it anymore. And uh, he

496
00:25:41,840 --> 00:25:45,080
Speaker 1: wants to open a bar somewhere, which is a tough business.

497
00:25:45,200 --> 00:25:48,600
Speaker 1: Or we have a house out in Santa Fe. Maybe

498
00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:50,200
Speaker 1: you can go to the Santa Fe Opera and build

499
00:25:50,240 --> 00:25:52,800
Speaker 1: sets for for the opera season. I don't know. We're

500
00:25:52,840 --> 00:26:08,800
Speaker 1: just trying to figure that out. And was was was

501
00:26:08,880 --> 00:26:13,199
Speaker 1: being gay difficult or did it provide any sort of

502
00:26:13,960 --> 00:26:17,359
Speaker 1: interesting path that you wouldn't have imagined in your career?

503
00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:20,680
Speaker 1: Was there any because people always talk about that being

504
00:26:20,720 --> 00:26:22,639
Speaker 1: a woman, or being a black woman, or being a

505
00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:25,960
Speaker 1: gay man or woman, the plight and the challenges, but

506
00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:29,520
Speaker 1: people don't often talk about the positive aspects, what, how,

507
00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:32,440
Speaker 1: how how it could change your path or chart your course.

508
00:26:32,640 --> 00:26:35,359
Speaker 1: It was a total positive experience. And I have a

509
00:26:35,359 --> 00:26:38,080
Speaker 1: lot of friends who did not grow up with a

510
00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:42,440
Speaker 1: positive experience being gay or lesbian. Um and I get that,

511
00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:44,879
Speaker 1: you know, And I was always there for them. I

512
00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:48,160
Speaker 1: always used it to my my advantage. I mean people wanted,

513
00:26:48,320 --> 00:26:51,280
Speaker 1: you know, growing up in the eighties in Texas, in Dallas, Texas,

514
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:56,520
Speaker 1: somewhat conservative area of the Bible Belt. I used it

515
00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:59,240
Speaker 1: as my this is what makes me, this is what

516
00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:01,919
Speaker 1: makes me unique. It makes me different than you. And

517
00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:04,000
Speaker 1: I'm a good guy. And so you know, if you

518
00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:06,280
Speaker 1: don't like gays in general, then I'm not your guy,

519
00:27:06,359 --> 00:27:10,040
Speaker 1: you know. And I never really had a problem with

520
00:27:10,119 --> 00:27:15,080
Speaker 1: it at all. I always always embraced it. And I like, again,

521
00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:16,879
Speaker 1: I say, I'm very lucky. I have friends who were

522
00:27:16,920 --> 00:27:19,880
Speaker 1: no longer with us because they could not. They couldn't,

523
00:27:19,960 --> 00:27:23,239
Speaker 1: they could not maneuver through that world. And you know,

524
00:27:23,760 --> 00:27:26,000
Speaker 1: something just told you inside. Was it your family to

525
00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:30,199
Speaker 1: just live in Dallas, Texas. That's interesting, to be honest

526
00:27:30,200 --> 00:27:32,080
Speaker 1: about it, But it sounds like being an introvert might

527
00:27:32,119 --> 00:27:34,280
Speaker 1: have helped you because you weren't craving to be the

528
00:27:34,280 --> 00:27:36,440
Speaker 1: center of attention or to be popular. You probably liked

529
00:27:36,480 --> 00:27:38,640
Speaker 1: your own bubble, and in that bubble you were gay

530
00:27:38,640 --> 00:27:40,800
Speaker 1: and did what you wanted. Yeah know, my battery was

531
00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:43,080
Speaker 1: replenished when I was alone, you know, and hanging out

532
00:27:43,119 --> 00:27:45,119
Speaker 1: and being creative with a couple of friends or you know,

533
00:27:45,119 --> 00:27:46,640
Speaker 1: back in the days we smoke a lot of pot

534
00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:49,080
Speaker 1: and just sitting around watch TV. But we were comfortable

535
00:27:49,080 --> 00:27:51,360
Speaker 1: with each other, you know. And you found other gay

536
00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:54,040
Speaker 1: friends in Dallas, Texas that many years ago. Oh absolutely,

537
00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:56,160
Speaker 1: I had a fake idea. When I was in high school.

538
00:27:56,160 --> 00:27:57,679
Speaker 1: We were going to the bars and stuff, going to

539
00:27:57,760 --> 00:28:02,360
Speaker 1: drag shows when before was even eighteen. So I got

540
00:28:02,359 --> 00:28:04,200
Speaker 1: that all out of the system, you know, And then

541
00:28:04,240 --> 00:28:08,720
Speaker 1: AIDS came along, and somehow I got through that maze.

542
00:28:09,680 --> 00:28:13,280
Speaker 1: Uh not. Not a lot of my friends did, a

543
00:28:13,359 --> 00:28:17,000
Speaker 1: lot of a lot of them didn't. But the challenges

544
00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:20,639
Speaker 1: were already always there. You can see the roadblocks miles away.

545
00:28:21,040 --> 00:28:22,960
Speaker 1: You see, you see a bus coming down the road.

546
00:28:22,960 --> 00:28:24,320
Speaker 1: You don't step out in front of it. You just

547
00:28:24,359 --> 00:28:28,480
Speaker 1: try to be smart, you know, maneuver and manipulate and

548
00:28:28,520 --> 00:28:33,200
Speaker 1: take care of yourself. And I'm here and amazing and

549
00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:35,800
Speaker 1: answered your question being gay. It was cool. You know,

550
00:28:35,960 --> 00:28:39,480
Speaker 1: I had a great experience. I wish everyone had as

551
00:28:39,520 --> 00:28:42,720
Speaker 1: great experience as I've had. And your family was supportive

552
00:28:42,800 --> 00:28:44,440
Speaker 1: of you. You know, my mom and dad were so

553
00:28:44,480 --> 00:28:46,280
Speaker 1: much older than me. We really didn't discuss it. I

554
00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:48,760
Speaker 1: mean I was out to almost everyone except for my

555
00:28:48,760 --> 00:28:50,640
Speaker 1: mom and dad, and they knew because I found a

556
00:28:50,680 --> 00:28:52,959
Speaker 1: book in their bedroom like what to Do when your

557
00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:56,200
Speaker 1: Kids a Gay. I don't know what the title of

558
00:28:56,200 --> 00:28:58,800
Speaker 1: the book was, but it was there. But it was

559
00:28:58,920 --> 00:29:03,320
Speaker 1: uncomfortable conversation with them. They were very conservative Southern Baptist.

560
00:29:04,000 --> 00:29:06,200
Speaker 1: They love me. There was always lots of love in

561
00:29:06,240 --> 00:29:08,600
Speaker 1: the house. They even told me one time, you know,

562
00:29:08,680 --> 00:29:13,320
Speaker 1: if you choose, if you choose a life of being homosexual,

563
00:29:14,240 --> 00:29:19,920
Speaker 1: you risk losing friends and relationships and business partners. Maybe

564
00:29:20,360 --> 00:29:22,560
Speaker 1: you know they were from that old school. I mean,

565
00:29:22,600 --> 00:29:25,040
Speaker 1: it's not untrue what I was saying at that time too,

566
00:29:25,160 --> 00:29:27,240
Speaker 1: to be honest, and even now, in many places, it's

567
00:29:27,240 --> 00:29:30,200
Speaker 1: not untrue. You did. I mean, you have to be

568
00:29:30,280 --> 00:29:32,920
Speaker 1: who you are, and there are you know, risks to that,

569
00:29:32,960 --> 00:29:36,120
Speaker 1: which is sad, but it's true. They never ever shut

570
00:29:36,160 --> 00:29:38,720
Speaker 1: me out, and they were always there was always a

571
00:29:38,760 --> 00:29:40,720
Speaker 1: hug and I love you in my house morning, noon

572
00:29:40,760 --> 00:29:43,160
Speaker 1: and night. That's so interesting. It's a different story, but

573
00:29:43,200 --> 00:29:45,680
Speaker 1: it still makes sense. And I'm sure there's still was

574
00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:49,120
Speaker 1: some struggle for you and them. That's interesting. Yeah, Sometimes

575
00:29:49,160 --> 00:29:52,160
Speaker 1: sometimes I I crawled into the closet when it comes

576
00:29:52,200 --> 00:29:55,080
Speaker 1: to heaven conversations with strangers or I don't know why,

577
00:29:55,160 --> 00:29:57,560
Speaker 1: it's just it's just it's in there. But I'm doing okay.

578
00:29:57,760 --> 00:30:00,480
Speaker 1: I'm a good nice, I'm a good gay. You're a

579
00:30:00,480 --> 00:30:04,360
Speaker 1: good gay, You're a good gig. What? How? How what

580
00:30:04,400 --> 00:30:06,640
Speaker 1: do you attribute your success to? How did you did

581
00:30:06,640 --> 00:30:08,960
Speaker 1: you just one foot in front of the other? What

582
00:30:09,000 --> 00:30:12,680
Speaker 1: was what were the big mistakes you made the real

583
00:30:12,840 --> 00:30:15,760
Speaker 1: like hit it out of the park, your best business choices,

584
00:30:15,920 --> 00:30:18,880
Speaker 1: just that sort of crossroads when you really made the right,

585
00:30:19,120 --> 00:30:21,400
Speaker 1: the correct turn. Maybe you can help me figure this

586
00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:24,720
Speaker 1: out because I've never Bethany. I've never been the one year,

587
00:30:24,760 --> 00:30:27,480
Speaker 1: five year, ten year planed guy. I've never been the

588
00:30:27,520 --> 00:30:29,440
Speaker 1: make a list every morning and get to check them

589
00:30:29,440 --> 00:30:32,680
Speaker 1: all off, same same. It was almost as if and

590
00:30:32,680 --> 00:30:34,960
Speaker 1: maybe you can relate with this. I'm driving down the

591
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:37,320
Speaker 1: highway and when I see a sign for an exit

592
00:30:37,400 --> 00:30:41,240
Speaker 1: looks interesting. I take it same. It's just is it timing?

593
00:30:41,400 --> 00:30:44,160
Speaker 1: Is it honestly, it sounds like gut, instinct and honesty,

594
00:30:44,240 --> 00:30:46,600
Speaker 1: and it sounds like it's about the journey and not

595
00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:49,440
Speaker 1: the destination. For me, what you're saying is the same

596
00:30:49,440 --> 00:30:52,959
Speaker 1: exact thing, and it's that I always say to my team,

597
00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:56,440
Speaker 1: look at be aware of the board. Don't forget the pieces,

598
00:30:56,480 --> 00:30:58,640
Speaker 1: but look at the whole board. So, but you got

599
00:30:58,640 --> 00:31:00,120
Speaker 1: to get in the car, get on the road. You

600
00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:02,000
Speaker 1: may hit a roadblock, you may run out of gas,

601
00:31:02,080 --> 00:31:03,720
Speaker 1: but you got to get in the car. Everyone's stuck

602
00:31:03,720 --> 00:31:07,080
Speaker 1: in their business plan and they can't get started, and

603
00:31:07,360 --> 00:31:10,280
Speaker 1: you may make a mistake, but just make that mistake work.

604
00:31:10,520 --> 00:31:12,480
Speaker 1: So all roads lead to rome. So I'm the same

605
00:31:12,520 --> 00:31:14,560
Speaker 1: as you. I know I have a successful business in

606
00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:19,200
Speaker 1: all of these different tentacles, but they're just because I

607
00:31:19,240 --> 00:31:21,480
Speaker 1: have ideas and I want to execute them. Now they

608
00:31:21,480 --> 00:31:24,160
Speaker 1: have to be interconnected because you're not gonna As you

609
00:31:24,240 --> 00:31:26,320
Speaker 1: get older, you realize time is more valuable than money,

610
00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:28,280
Speaker 1: So you're not gonna do things that don't have a

611
00:31:28,400 --> 00:31:33,000
Speaker 1: financial or spiritual or emotional return on their investment. But

612
00:31:33,120 --> 00:31:34,640
Speaker 1: I do the same thing as you do. I just

613
00:31:34,680 --> 00:31:38,800
Speaker 1: have always said, from my horrific divorce to my career,

614
00:31:38,880 --> 00:31:41,800
Speaker 1: it is one foot in front of the other. It

615
00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:43,640
Speaker 1: is like what hole are we on in golf? We're

616
00:31:43,680 --> 00:31:46,360
Speaker 1: on this whole and we just keep going. And you

617
00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:48,960
Speaker 1: know that it is. It's just I'm the same as you,

618
00:31:49,040 --> 00:31:51,520
Speaker 1: and I sometimes don't like it. And then I stopped, Well, yeah,

619
00:31:51,600 --> 00:31:53,320
Speaker 1: I mean, don't you feel like, gosh, you know what,

620
00:31:53,400 --> 00:31:55,640
Speaker 1: maybe I should be watching all the Ted talks. I

621
00:31:55,680 --> 00:31:59,040
Speaker 1: don't know. I don't. I don't I need to go

622
00:31:59,160 --> 00:32:01,240
Speaker 1: read the new Brunet round book or I'm going to

623
00:32:01,320 --> 00:32:03,600
Speaker 1: be a failure. Rollo, God bless Burnet. I think she's

624
00:32:03,640 --> 00:32:06,880
Speaker 1: she's great at what she does. I don't know. Maybe

625
00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:10,560
Speaker 1: I almost call it laziness, so I don't think that's correct, though.

626
00:32:10,880 --> 00:32:13,160
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm just too lazy to do the

627
00:32:13,920 --> 00:32:17,080
Speaker 1: checklist thing. And the I don't think if you whatever

628
00:32:17,120 --> 00:32:19,120
Speaker 1: the checklist is, if you're not thinking about it or

629
00:32:19,200 --> 00:32:21,479
Speaker 1: dreaming about it, I don't think you'd be good at it.

630
00:32:21,480 --> 00:32:23,320
Speaker 1: It's the same thing as I am. I mean, I

631
00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:27,160
Speaker 1: don't need to be a billionaire, and I value my sleep,

632
00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:30,320
Speaker 1: and I value my daughter, and I value my life.

633
00:32:30,320 --> 00:32:33,040
Speaker 1: And my peace of mind. Meaning you're feeling about radio

634
00:32:33,120 --> 00:32:37,360
Speaker 1: back before nine eleven was my feelings about my relationship

635
00:32:37,800 --> 00:32:41,640
Speaker 1: with reality television in that format. I just I didn't

636
00:32:41,720 --> 00:32:43,440
Speaker 1: like the way I felt. I felt gross. I felt

637
00:32:43,480 --> 00:32:45,640
Speaker 1: like I was prostituting myself for the check I was getting.

638
00:32:46,520 --> 00:32:49,040
Speaker 1: So I had to make a decision that you know,

639
00:32:49,080 --> 00:32:51,440
Speaker 1: it was not financial, it was just emotional. But those

640
00:32:51,440 --> 00:32:53,400
Speaker 1: aren't the easiest things to do because your mind's playing

641
00:32:53,400 --> 00:32:56,000
Speaker 1: tricks on you, and it happens in relationships and all

642
00:32:56,000 --> 00:32:57,720
Speaker 1: the types of things too. We just have to live

643
00:32:57,760 --> 00:32:59,719
Speaker 1: as honestly as you can. I think you've always been

644
00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:03,040
Speaker 1: pretty honest from your sexuality, you know, from being gay

645
00:33:03,040 --> 00:33:05,080
Speaker 1: in Dallas, Texas. It sounds like from day one you've

646
00:33:05,120 --> 00:33:07,440
Speaker 1: just gone with in your gut and your heart and

647
00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:10,040
Speaker 1: just keep going. And you're doing it now. Well call

648
00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:13,040
Speaker 1: it reckless. I don't know. It's just the way I

649
00:33:13,080 --> 00:33:16,240
Speaker 1: hate to sound like a whatever it's it's the universe

650
00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:18,800
Speaker 1: is looking out for me. God, you know, whatever you're

651
00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:21,760
Speaker 1: believing in. I truly believe there's a force that's looking

652
00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:24,240
Speaker 1: out for me. It's at least helping me guide myself

653
00:33:24,480 --> 00:33:28,640
Speaker 1: in the right directions. I think another thing's timing and luck,

654
00:33:29,080 --> 00:33:32,680
Speaker 1: lots of luck. Um. And someone told me once, oh,

655
00:33:32,720 --> 00:33:34,280
Speaker 1: you know what, you need to give yourself more credit

656
00:33:34,320 --> 00:33:37,320
Speaker 1: and stuff stopped getting giving so much credit to luck.

657
00:33:37,760 --> 00:33:40,400
Speaker 1: I said, well, no, I really do think you really

658
00:33:40,440 --> 00:33:42,479
Speaker 1: do some people. Do you know who else said that? Um?

659
00:33:43,040 --> 00:33:46,960
Speaker 1: Why am I having? Um? Graham Norton. I was trying

660
00:33:46,960 --> 00:33:49,480
Speaker 1: to I was trying to make everything into something. You know.

661
00:33:49,560 --> 00:33:52,640
Speaker 1: I just thought like, and he was lucky effective. I mean,

662
00:33:52,640 --> 00:33:55,080
Speaker 1: he's not only lucky, but he just said I just

663
00:33:55,160 --> 00:33:58,520
Speaker 1: landed here. I'm you know, he considers himself very lucky.

664
00:33:58,840 --> 00:34:01,800
Speaker 1: I'm paraphrasing, but I think he's made it like you do,

665
00:34:01,880 --> 00:34:03,880
Speaker 1: like you just feel like I don't know how to

666
00:34:03,920 --> 00:34:06,280
Speaker 1: how this all happened. That's how you seem. It's sure

667
00:34:06,320 --> 00:34:08,120
Speaker 1: as fun, though I hope it lasts for a while longer.

668
00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:11,479
Speaker 1: I'm having a good time. That's amazing. That's different. Looking

669
00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:14,279
Speaker 1: for a new chapter, though, I'm actively looking for new

670
00:34:14,320 --> 00:34:18,960
Speaker 1: chapter right now. And it's it's it's come scary. You know.

671
00:34:19,080 --> 00:34:22,560
Speaker 1: I've been doing the morning show at one New York

672
00:34:22,640 --> 00:34:25,960
Speaker 1: and syndicated for twenty five years. I've been to Z one.

673
00:34:29,040 --> 00:34:31,239
Speaker 1: I've been there a long time, you know, and and

674
00:34:31,280 --> 00:34:34,400
Speaker 1: I've been working with some of the same people for years.

675
00:34:34,440 --> 00:34:37,319
Speaker 1: So you're looking for something, I'm looking for something, and

676
00:34:37,360 --> 00:34:40,680
Speaker 1: I'm and part of me is that lazy Elvis kind

677
00:34:40,680 --> 00:34:42,279
Speaker 1: of waiting for it to fall out of this guy

678
00:34:42,360 --> 00:34:44,400
Speaker 1: and just hit me upside the head like we that

679
00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:48,320
Speaker 1: sometimes happens to us. And so I don't know, well

680
00:34:48,360 --> 00:34:51,040
Speaker 1: I have if you want, this is not no pressure,

681
00:34:51,080 --> 00:34:53,279
Speaker 1: only if you want. It could be as soon as

682
00:34:53,320 --> 00:34:55,680
Speaker 1: Thursday or any time if you want to go on

683
00:34:55,719 --> 00:34:58,880
Speaker 1: a mission, like you could go on a mission for

684
00:34:59,120 --> 00:35:02,200
Speaker 1: I can't go third day because um, I'm going away

685
00:35:02,200 --> 00:35:04,200
Speaker 1: and I have full custody of my daughter now, so

686
00:35:04,239 --> 00:35:06,000
Speaker 1: it's not and I've never had childcare, so I'm having

687
00:35:06,040 --> 00:35:10,040
Speaker 1: different personal did get calendar challenges. But if you want

688
00:35:10,040 --> 00:35:12,320
Speaker 1: to go on any of these relief missions, it's pretty

689
00:35:12,360 --> 00:35:15,200
Speaker 1: amazing that we got. I mean, I consider it like

690
00:35:15,280 --> 00:35:17,600
Speaker 1: getting to be front row at Madison Square Garden, that

691
00:35:17,640 --> 00:35:20,680
Speaker 1: we get to be the first ones into these torn,

692
00:35:21,760 --> 00:35:26,640
Speaker 1: you know, devastated places and distribute relief like real time.

693
00:35:27,280 --> 00:35:29,680
Speaker 1: We have warehouses full of aid that two million dollars

694
00:35:29,680 --> 00:35:31,279
Speaker 1: of aid that will be going to Kentucky. So if

695
00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:33,440
Speaker 1: you ever want to go on a mission, and it

696
00:35:33,560 --> 00:35:35,160
Speaker 1: only could be it could be just for a day.

697
00:35:35,360 --> 00:35:37,439
Speaker 1: Just go in and talk to people. You you would

698
00:35:37,440 --> 00:35:39,360
Speaker 1: probably love it and they would probably love it too.

699
00:35:39,480 --> 00:35:41,960
Speaker 1: I've never done you know what. One time we actually

700
00:35:42,000 --> 00:35:46,000
Speaker 1: flew into Haiti and went to a woman's clinic where

701
00:35:46,000 --> 00:35:49,400
Speaker 1: they were having babies and giving birth and it sounds

702
00:35:49,400 --> 00:35:52,400
Speaker 1: like you you've done the same thing, and that was

703
00:35:52,920 --> 00:35:56,040
Speaker 1: it was just for the day and it was very moving.

704
00:35:56,800 --> 00:35:58,920
Speaker 1: I would love to I'd love to do something like that. Okay,

705
00:35:58,960 --> 00:36:01,560
Speaker 1: if you want to do it, you know, because we could,

706
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:03,839
Speaker 1: you could. I can always tell you when you could

707
00:36:03,840 --> 00:36:06,960
Speaker 1: go the soonest you know, anywhere. It depends upon your

708
00:36:06,960 --> 00:36:10,960
Speaker 1: work schedule at Cuter but uh, right now we're doing

709
00:36:11,000 --> 00:36:14,000
Speaker 1: a big thing in Kentucky. Um. Anyway, it's just meaningful

710
00:36:14,040 --> 00:36:16,480
Speaker 1: and it gives you that sort of purpose and that feeling.

711
00:36:16,520 --> 00:36:18,960
Speaker 1: Doesn't mean it's your life's work, but it mean I mean,

712
00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:21,880
Speaker 1: it just means it's just it's good to for you.

713
00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:24,040
Speaker 1: Would be perfect because you already connect to people. Ask

714
00:36:24,040 --> 00:36:29,279
Speaker 1: you a question once you're done with this this what

715
00:36:29,320 --> 00:36:32,799
Speaker 1: we're doing now, and with other people you've you've you've

716
00:36:32,840 --> 00:36:35,560
Speaker 1: interviewed and talked with. When you turn off your computer,

717
00:36:36,000 --> 00:36:38,320
Speaker 1: what mode you go into? Do you stop and evaluate

718
00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:41,920
Speaker 1: what just happened? Okay, that was good, I feel Do

719
00:36:41,920 --> 00:36:46,120
Speaker 1: you feel satisfied? What comes in your daily satisfaction? Like

720
00:36:46,239 --> 00:36:53,240
Speaker 1: what checks off your your boxes. So it sounds cliche,

721
00:36:53,360 --> 00:36:56,480
Speaker 1: I'm my daughter is that it makes me whole. She

722
00:36:56,600 --> 00:36:59,040
Speaker 1: just makes me a whole person. It's unbelievable just being

723
00:36:59,080 --> 00:37:02,879
Speaker 1: with her experience. And when we do something that's an experience,

724
00:37:02,920 --> 00:37:06,239
Speaker 1: like we've done something Christmas e or decorated the tree,

725
00:37:06,320 --> 00:37:09,360
Speaker 1: or we made pink cupcakes this weekend with candy canes,

726
00:37:09,680 --> 00:37:12,520
Speaker 1: that feels the best. UM. I will say that I

727
00:37:12,560 --> 00:37:15,359
Speaker 1: have never loved anything more than doing this podcast for

728
00:37:15,440 --> 00:37:18,520
Speaker 1: so many reasons. I'm gonna be super honest. I had

729
00:37:18,560 --> 00:37:20,600
Speaker 1: never listened. I have never listened to a podcast to

730
00:37:20,680 --> 00:37:23,120
Speaker 1: this day. I did not know what it was and

731
00:37:23,160 --> 00:37:26,080
Speaker 1: I didn't even know what I was going to do. UM,

732
00:37:26,120 --> 00:37:27,919
Speaker 1: and I thought I would talk to these interesting people.

733
00:37:27,920 --> 00:37:29,560
Speaker 1: I could can't believe the people that I've been able

734
00:37:29,560 --> 00:37:32,520
Speaker 1: to have on here. It's it's it's staggering who I've

735
00:37:32,520 --> 00:37:36,279
Speaker 1: spoken to. UM. But it's like I get to get

736
00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:38,520
Speaker 1: this information. You're the only person the whole time that

737
00:37:38,560 --> 00:37:40,640
Speaker 1: I didn't read a single thing about in the papers

738
00:37:40,640 --> 00:37:42,440
Speaker 1: that I have printed out because I just know you

739
00:37:42,480 --> 00:37:44,560
Speaker 1: and I wanted to do it this way. But for

740
00:37:44,600 --> 00:37:47,160
Speaker 1: everyone else, I look for twenty minutes at what's been

741
00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:49,279
Speaker 1: written about them and circle certain things that reminds me

742
00:37:49,280 --> 00:37:51,719
Speaker 1: of certain things. And then it's like reading a book

743
00:37:51,760 --> 00:37:54,400
Speaker 1: because I'm talking to these people and I'm sharing with

744
00:37:54,440 --> 00:37:58,279
Speaker 1: the people listening how they did it, and everybody has

745
00:37:58,360 --> 00:38:00,680
Speaker 1: some relation to the way you've done it or I've

746
00:38:00,680 --> 00:38:02,600
Speaker 1: done it, or Mark Cuban did it, or Hillary Clinton

747
00:38:02,640 --> 00:38:06,080
Speaker 1: did it. So they're creating this their own quote, their

748
00:38:06,120 --> 00:38:09,640
Speaker 1: own um toolbox to success. So this show is just

749
00:38:09,680 --> 00:38:12,640
Speaker 1: the vehicle to give that to them. So I love that.

750
00:38:12,719 --> 00:38:14,320
Speaker 1: And then it could be as stupid as me ranting

751
00:38:14,360 --> 00:38:19,280
Speaker 1: about some dumb vegetables or packing or just giving tips

752
00:38:19,280 --> 00:38:21,359
Speaker 1: about health, and it's just giving me so much. So

753
00:38:21,560 --> 00:38:24,279
Speaker 1: I'm giving so much. It's giving so much to me.

754
00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:28,799
Speaker 1: But also I'm meeting someone differently, like I'm getting to

755
00:38:28,840 --> 00:38:30,799
Speaker 1: know you now, we know each other better next time

756
00:38:30,840 --> 00:38:32,719
Speaker 1: I see you. And I'm really only interviewing people that

757
00:38:32,760 --> 00:38:35,360
Speaker 1: I want to interview. I'm interested in talking to them.

758
00:38:35,400 --> 00:38:37,520
Speaker 1: So now I got to know you way more because

759
00:38:37,719 --> 00:38:41,560
Speaker 1: it moves pretty quickly. So it's a great experience, to

760
00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:43,560
Speaker 1: say the least. I have to say. So I was

761
00:38:43,600 --> 00:38:48,320
Speaker 1: having a brunch on a Sunday in Soho it rules,

762
00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:51,880
Speaker 1: and I'm there with Alex and our old uncle Johnny.

763
00:38:51,880 --> 00:38:53,959
Speaker 1: He's crazy, he's old and he's gay and he wears

764
00:38:53,960 --> 00:38:56,400
Speaker 1: the two pay I think for you at the table.

765
00:38:57,280 --> 00:39:00,040
Speaker 1: And then so you and your daughter are walking. I

766
00:39:00,640 --> 00:39:03,839
Speaker 1: and I we were masked and we're like, oh, Bethany, hi,

767
00:39:04,360 --> 00:39:07,400
Speaker 1: and you were so kind to exit out of traffic

768
00:39:07,440 --> 00:39:09,799
Speaker 1: on on the Prince Street and say hi to us.

769
00:39:10,280 --> 00:39:12,560
Speaker 1: And then when you left, Alex said, do you really

770
00:39:12,560 --> 00:39:15,440
Speaker 1: know Bethany Frankel? I said, well, I think we're getting

771
00:39:15,480 --> 00:39:17,719
Speaker 1: to know each other slowly here and there. You know

772
00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:21,200
Speaker 1: that's her daughter. Your daughter is beautiful, by the way, um,

773
00:39:21,680 --> 00:39:25,919
Speaker 1: and so in congratulations on your new your new level

774
00:39:26,000 --> 00:39:28,240
Speaker 1: of relationship with your daughter with a custom full custody.

775
00:39:28,400 --> 00:39:31,680
Speaker 1: How cool is that. But the fact that you you

776
00:39:31,719 --> 00:39:33,680
Speaker 1: came over and just said hi, and you could have

777
00:39:33,719 --> 00:39:35,920
Speaker 1: easily went okay, well bye bye, but you didn't. You

778
00:39:35,960 --> 00:39:39,040
Speaker 1: stayed for a minute or two, and that that was

779
00:39:39,160 --> 00:39:41,719
Speaker 1: nice New York City. Running into people on the streets

780
00:39:41,719 --> 00:39:43,799
Speaker 1: in New York cities were my favorite things ever, And

781
00:39:43,840 --> 00:39:46,480
Speaker 1: so that was interesting. That was a great day. I

782
00:39:46,520 --> 00:39:48,319
Speaker 1: love it because if you think about it, it's just

783
00:39:48,360 --> 00:39:51,719
Speaker 1: one huge small town, you know. And but so when

784
00:39:51,760 --> 00:39:54,960
Speaker 1: you when you you exited the sidewalk just to say

785
00:39:55,040 --> 00:39:57,840
Speaker 1: hi in our little outdoor area, that was really cool,

786
00:39:57,960 --> 00:40:03,080
Speaker 1: you know. And I never, ever, never ever undervalue what

787
00:40:03,360 --> 00:40:06,480
Speaker 1: that is like for people, just friends or people you've

788
00:40:07,200 --> 00:40:11,840
Speaker 1: acquaintances or best friends to stop down and just invest

789
00:40:11,920 --> 00:40:27,440
Speaker 1: a moment just to say hi. So this show just

790
00:40:27,520 --> 00:40:29,480
Speaker 1: gives me so much, and to be able to do

791
00:40:29,520 --> 00:40:32,680
Speaker 1: it in pajamas, not because just because it's who I

792
00:40:32,680 --> 00:40:36,560
Speaker 1: truly am, and that's not the superficiality of wearing lashes

793
00:40:36,760 --> 00:40:39,800
Speaker 1: and sequence and all that stuff I did in reality

794
00:40:39,840 --> 00:40:42,040
Speaker 1: TV isn't the best thing that I have to offer

795
00:40:42,080 --> 00:40:45,280
Speaker 1: to people. So that's just a sort of superficial aspect

796
00:40:45,280 --> 00:40:49,160
Speaker 1: of myself. And as we keep going, I find social

797
00:40:49,160 --> 00:40:52,279
Speaker 1: media less interesting to me because it seems like a

798
00:40:52,320 --> 00:40:57,080
Speaker 1: superficial portrayal and this is the most authentic thing I

799
00:40:57,120 --> 00:40:59,920
Speaker 1: can possibly think about. So that's so I love the

800
00:41:00,280 --> 00:41:03,280
Speaker 1: hour because I get to you know, really go deeper

801
00:41:03,280 --> 00:41:05,440
Speaker 1: with you and then know you better. And I'm learning.

802
00:41:05,480 --> 00:41:08,640
Speaker 1: I mean, I've learned on this call. So that's huge

803
00:41:08,680 --> 00:41:10,439
Speaker 1: for me. I feel like I said something really rude

804
00:41:10,440 --> 00:41:14,640
Speaker 1: to you one time about you being on uh Real Housewives?

805
00:41:14,960 --> 00:41:17,840
Speaker 1: Do you remember that? You do now, but in the beginning,

806
00:41:17,880 --> 00:41:20,239
Speaker 1: I do remember you you evolving, but it might have

807
00:41:20,239 --> 00:41:22,920
Speaker 1: been too. Here's the thing. I get it overall when

808
00:41:22,960 --> 00:41:24,880
Speaker 1: I first came on, and I remember having this experience

809
00:41:24,880 --> 00:41:28,000
Speaker 1: on the view. It's a joke, and you know, it

810
00:41:28,040 --> 00:41:30,120
Speaker 1: seems like a joke. We're first starting as train wrex

811
00:41:30,160 --> 00:41:32,640
Speaker 1: on this reality show and someone has to interview you

812
00:41:32,680 --> 00:41:35,439
Speaker 1: and they don't know who you are and they're rolling

813
00:41:35,480 --> 00:41:37,839
Speaker 1: their eyes because you yet you haven't even earned it,

814
00:41:38,160 --> 00:41:42,120
Speaker 1: and I don't care, and you're you're a radio radio host,

815
00:41:42,160 --> 00:41:43,960
Speaker 1: and there's other people in the room and it can

816
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:45,400
Speaker 1: be snarking. I have no idea what it was, but

817
00:41:45,440 --> 00:41:48,680
Speaker 1: I know in my mind I remember knowing you later

818
00:41:49,400 --> 00:41:52,319
Speaker 1: meant you taking me more seriously. But I that's part

819
00:41:52,360 --> 00:41:54,440
Speaker 1: of what that's part of life. And you're not supposed

820
00:41:54,440 --> 00:41:56,359
Speaker 1: to be some clown that walks in on day one

821
00:41:56,400 --> 00:41:58,120
Speaker 1: and get the respect of people who have been doing

822
00:41:58,120 --> 00:42:01,080
Speaker 1: this for thirty years. I love I love the word clown,

823
00:42:03,120 --> 00:42:05,600
Speaker 1: so it applies to so many different things. No, he's

824
00:42:05,600 --> 00:42:07,560
Speaker 1: actually in a text message I had with you or

825
00:42:08,080 --> 00:42:11,160
Speaker 1: a d M. I was like, God, I wish you're

826
00:42:11,239 --> 00:42:13,000
Speaker 1: so great when you're not on that show. And I

827
00:42:13,560 --> 00:42:15,319
Speaker 1: was I think I've just seen an episode or something.

828
00:42:15,320 --> 00:42:17,839
Speaker 1: It doesn't matter. Oh that's so funny. Oh wow, Yeah,

829
00:42:17,840 --> 00:42:21,840
Speaker 1: well the show is its own thing. Um. So what

830
00:42:21,960 --> 00:42:24,760
Speaker 1: has your rose been of your career and your thorn

831
00:42:24,880 --> 00:42:27,120
Speaker 1: of your career? The rose of my career the people

832
00:42:27,160 --> 00:42:28,640
Speaker 1: I meet and the people I get to work with

833
00:42:28,680 --> 00:42:31,960
Speaker 1: every day, and of course the longevity of some of

834
00:42:31,960 --> 00:42:33,719
Speaker 1: the listenership. And we we have people who have been

835
00:42:33,760 --> 00:42:38,000
Speaker 1: listening since we're twenty five years ago and they're still there. Uh.

836
00:42:38,120 --> 00:42:40,759
Speaker 1: More roses, I've got dozens of roses. I mean picking

837
00:42:40,840 --> 00:42:44,160
Speaker 1: up new listeners. I just started listening to you. Oh gosh,

838
00:42:44,239 --> 00:42:46,840
Speaker 1: which the name is the people again and we're getting

839
00:42:46,840 --> 00:42:50,920
Speaker 1: to know you and those are the great things. And um,

840
00:42:50,960 --> 00:42:54,080
Speaker 1: and luckily I have a partner who totally understands what

841
00:42:54,200 --> 00:42:56,120
Speaker 1: I do and as I understand what he does. Those

842
00:42:56,120 --> 00:42:58,640
Speaker 1: are the roses, the thorns, you know, waking up at

843
00:42:58,719 --> 00:43:03,239
Speaker 1: fucking four thirty every you know, it's just you're never

844
00:43:03,440 --> 00:43:05,840
Speaker 1: used to it these I mean, it's time to go

845
00:43:05,840 --> 00:43:09,880
Speaker 1: see Dr Rosenberger again, because it's time to like, you know,

846
00:43:09,960 --> 00:43:13,239
Speaker 1: the hours. And there is this past year and a

847
00:43:13,280 --> 00:43:15,640
Speaker 1: half which this is not unique to me, the fatigue

848
00:43:15,719 --> 00:43:19,319
Speaker 1: on working out of zoom rooms so much. Um, hi,

849
00:43:19,560 --> 00:43:24,840
Speaker 1: we're in one now, but that's but this is different. Uh,

850
00:43:24,880 --> 00:43:27,719
Speaker 1: that's about it. I love what I do. I mean,

851
00:43:28,440 --> 00:43:31,120
Speaker 1: we go in there without a script, with maybe just

852
00:43:31,160 --> 00:43:34,200
Speaker 1: a little bit of a roadmap here or there. It's

853
00:43:34,200 --> 00:43:36,640
Speaker 1: just a collection of people that come to the table

854
00:43:36,719 --> 00:43:40,360
Speaker 1: every morning with stories and we just apply them and

855
00:43:40,360 --> 00:43:42,120
Speaker 1: then before you know it, it's four hours later and

856
00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:46,000
Speaker 1: we're done. I can't think of any other business I

857
00:43:46,000 --> 00:43:48,960
Speaker 1: could be in where I can do that. And they

858
00:43:49,000 --> 00:43:51,720
Speaker 1: pay us well, they take care of us. I heart

859
00:43:51,840 --> 00:43:54,319
Speaker 1: is so supportive of us. So, oh my god, how

860
00:43:54,360 --> 00:44:00,840
Speaker 1: great is I hear they're greatly? How great is Conall? Smart?

861
00:44:00,960 --> 00:44:04,239
Speaker 1: He's a smart guy, and he plays the long game.

862
00:44:04,400 --> 00:44:06,840
Speaker 1: He doesn't play the nickel and dime game. He plays

863
00:44:06,880 --> 00:44:09,680
Speaker 1: the long game. That from my experience, it's just like

864
00:44:09,960 --> 00:44:12,200
Speaker 1: that's such an easy relationship. I heart's amazing and keep

865
00:44:12,239 --> 00:44:15,120
Speaker 1: listening people to everybody because I heart is amazing. Well,

866
00:44:15,320 --> 00:44:17,400
Speaker 1: and we've been very lucky they give us the resources,

867
00:44:17,400 --> 00:44:20,200
Speaker 1: the research tools. I mean, it's it goes so deep

868
00:44:20,400 --> 00:44:23,359
Speaker 1: down into the dungeon that most people don't see these things.

869
00:44:23,680 --> 00:44:27,480
Speaker 1: It's great. So like how you asked the question roses

870
00:44:27,480 --> 00:44:31,319
Speaker 1: and thorns. I I have a field of roses with

871
00:44:31,360 --> 00:44:33,959
Speaker 1: maybe a couple of thorns in the corner that fuck

872
00:44:34,040 --> 00:44:36,680
Speaker 1: them and they don't really bother me. I forgot that

873
00:44:36,719 --> 00:44:39,600
Speaker 1: you lost a lot of How much weight did you lose?

874
00:44:39,680 --> 00:44:42,040
Speaker 1: I forgot all about that. I've gained some of it back,

875
00:44:43,120 --> 00:44:44,960
Speaker 1: it doesn't look like it, But did you lose like

876
00:44:45,000 --> 00:44:48,040
Speaker 1: an extreme amount of weight I had? Yeah? I had

877
00:44:48,080 --> 00:44:54,359
Speaker 1: the gastric sleeve bypad, not bypass but whatever, or the

878
00:44:54,400 --> 00:44:57,319
Speaker 1: thing that's different than the lap band. Yeah, yeah, the

879
00:44:57,360 --> 00:44:59,920
Speaker 1: lap band. That's the one that Al roker head in

880
00:45:00,040 --> 00:45:02,520
Speaker 1: and he shipped his pants at the White House. Um wait,

881
00:45:02,719 --> 00:45:04,719
Speaker 1: I don't think I remember that. But that cannot be

882
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:07,879
Speaker 1: someone's legacy. Okay, well that's oh no, no, it's it's

883
00:45:07,960 --> 00:45:12,439
Speaker 1: well documented. Um this was this was five years ago,

884
00:45:12,680 --> 00:45:14,440
Speaker 1: and it was the best idea because I was at

885
00:45:14,480 --> 00:45:18,520
Speaker 1: two hundred and sixty pounds and I went down to

886
00:45:18,760 --> 00:45:22,480
Speaker 1: one thirty and I was skeletal. I needed to gain weight,

887
00:45:22,560 --> 00:45:25,040
Speaker 1: but I went that's you know what did, Bethany. I

888
00:45:25,080 --> 00:45:27,400
Speaker 1: finally got to buy clothes because when you're an overweight guy,

889
00:45:27,440 --> 00:45:29,600
Speaker 1: and I didn't. I didn't hate myself because I was

890
00:45:29,680 --> 00:45:32,160
Speaker 1: overweight at all. I just didn't like sweating and I

891
00:45:32,200 --> 00:45:34,520
Speaker 1: wanted to be able to fit into some cool clothes.

892
00:45:34,800 --> 00:45:38,560
Speaker 1: I went close shopping crazy, and then you can actually

893
00:45:38,560 --> 00:45:40,680
Speaker 1: start gaining weight. I can't fit into any of those

894
00:45:40,680 --> 00:45:43,920
Speaker 1: clothes anyway. So our apartment is just sitting there by

895
00:45:43,960 --> 00:45:47,600
Speaker 1: itself in Tribeca and it still has pre pandemic size

896
00:45:47,640 --> 00:45:50,799
Speaker 1: clothing in it. So when I go back, I'm like,

897
00:45:51,600 --> 00:45:53,120
Speaker 1: I have to I have to like pack to go

898
00:45:53,160 --> 00:45:55,000
Speaker 1: to the city so I can have some jeans that

899
00:45:55,040 --> 00:45:56,880
Speaker 1: fit now. But no, I lost a lot of weight,

900
00:45:57,280 --> 00:45:59,600
Speaker 1: And do you still have noise about it at all?

901
00:45:59,719 --> 00:46:01,520
Speaker 1: Or food noise or that I'm going to be fat

902
00:46:01,560 --> 00:46:03,839
Speaker 1: again noise or any emotional There has to be an

903
00:46:03,840 --> 00:46:06,959
Speaker 1: emotional aspect to losing a hushing and thirty pounds. Oh yeah,

904
00:46:07,000 --> 00:46:09,480
Speaker 1: Like ten miutes before this this podcast, I was at

905
00:46:09,480 --> 00:46:11,960
Speaker 1: the refrigerator like, what are we gonna talk about. Here's

906
00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:18,280
Speaker 1: some beef stew um. You know what it is, naturally

907
00:46:18,480 --> 00:46:21,200
Speaker 1: and my doctor's my surgeon told me that your stomach

908
00:46:21,239 --> 00:46:23,839
Speaker 1: starts to expand it's just gonna do it. And so now,

909
00:46:24,200 --> 00:46:26,160
Speaker 1: because you know, I can blame it on pandemic, but

910
00:46:26,440 --> 00:46:29,040
Speaker 1: it's all me I take for responsibility. So we've been eating,

911
00:46:29,040 --> 00:46:31,440
Speaker 1: we've been drinking more, you know, we've been making bad decisions.

912
00:46:31,440 --> 00:46:34,040
Speaker 1: So the weight's starting to come back. So it's bothering

913
00:46:34,040 --> 00:46:35,480
Speaker 1: me because I never want to go back to that

914
00:46:35,520 --> 00:46:38,879
Speaker 1: place again. It just wasn't for me. And uh so

915
00:46:39,080 --> 00:46:42,840
Speaker 1: it's a struggle, but yeah, it's but you have a threshold.

916
00:46:42,920 --> 00:46:47,120
Speaker 1: You're not really you're not really rationally afraid that you'll

917
00:46:47,120 --> 00:46:48,799
Speaker 1: go back to that place. You just don't even like

918
00:46:49,000 --> 00:46:51,719
Speaker 1: not being in control of exactly where it's supposed to be,

919
00:46:51,880 --> 00:46:55,040
Speaker 1: exactly exactly. Yeah, yeah, it's on a thing. It's I

920
00:46:55,239 --> 00:46:58,440
Speaker 1: talked about it because it's there's such an emotional aspect

921
00:46:58,560 --> 00:47:01,239
Speaker 1: to to wait, and I wrote a book on it,

922
00:47:01,320 --> 00:47:04,279
Speaker 1: naturally Thin and Noise about it and the emotions of

923
00:47:04,280 --> 00:47:06,360
Speaker 1: it and holding onto things and it's it's a struggle

924
00:47:06,400 --> 00:47:08,520
Speaker 1: for people, you know, and Also, I have so many

925
00:47:08,560 --> 00:47:13,160
Speaker 1: friends who triple their workouts during pandemic and they lost

926
00:47:13,200 --> 00:47:15,960
Speaker 1: a lot of weight, they stopped drinking and didn't have

927
00:47:16,000 --> 00:47:17,880
Speaker 1: my other friends like me. We went we went the

928
00:47:17,880 --> 00:47:20,399
Speaker 1: other way. Man. We're like, yes, but you know, we're

929
00:47:20,400 --> 00:47:23,200
Speaker 1: starting to slow down it. It's it's under control to

930
00:47:23,320 --> 00:47:26,080
Speaker 1: a point, and I'm feeling pretty good about it. Well,

931
00:47:26,440 --> 00:47:31,720
Speaker 1: you're amazing. I so appreciate the conversation, the discussion, the

932
00:47:31,800 --> 00:47:35,920
Speaker 1: authenticity um and just being so honest. So thank you

933
00:47:36,120 --> 00:47:38,719
Speaker 1: so much for giving me your time. And what did

934
00:47:38,719 --> 00:47:41,520
Speaker 1: we solve? What? What did we get to here? We

935
00:47:41,680 --> 00:47:45,000
Speaker 1: got to the takeaway? So I'm gonna do my my

936
00:47:45,280 --> 00:47:48,240
Speaker 1: I always do reflections, but I'll do them with Elvis

937
00:47:48,280 --> 00:47:50,600
Speaker 1: because he's not sure that we learned anything. So I

938
00:47:50,640 --> 00:47:53,880
Speaker 1: didn't say that. I'm asking you what you think, okay.

939
00:47:53,920 --> 00:47:58,680
Speaker 1: So my reflection is that Elvis Duran is unique in

940
00:47:58,760 --> 00:48:00,840
Speaker 1: that he knew what he wanted to do or listen

941
00:48:00,920 --> 00:48:04,279
Speaker 1: to that gut instinct as a child and followed that path,

942
00:48:04,360 --> 00:48:07,840
Speaker 1: but not with overly being tortured about it, just with

943
00:48:07,960 --> 00:48:09,480
Speaker 1: one ft in front of the other and always being

944
00:48:09,600 --> 00:48:12,560
Speaker 1: honest with himself about who he is. That also pertains

945
00:48:12,640 --> 00:48:16,319
Speaker 1: to his um being gay and finding a way for

946
00:48:16,400 --> 00:48:18,839
Speaker 1: that to work even in an environment where that would

947
00:48:18,880 --> 00:48:24,040
Speaker 1: not normally work at all. Dallas, Texas Republican Bible Belt UH. Separately,

948
00:48:24,320 --> 00:48:27,640
Speaker 1: he has found philanthropy and changed his whole life after

949
00:48:27,719 --> 00:48:30,120
Speaker 1: not eleven by finding meaning through his career. So you

950
00:48:30,160 --> 00:48:34,280
Speaker 1: can do something that you love, uh, and it can change.

951
00:48:34,360 --> 00:48:36,800
Speaker 1: The journey can change, but you also can find meaning

952
00:48:37,120 --> 00:48:41,719
Speaker 1: through that career, through your career UH, and that you're

953
00:48:41,760 --> 00:48:46,560
Speaker 1: honest about your relationship and you're genuinely happy and still

954
00:48:46,560 --> 00:48:49,040
Speaker 1: looking for the next chapter. So you're always searching. But

955
00:48:50,280 --> 00:48:52,600
Speaker 1: success has been fairly simple, not because it hasn't been

956
00:48:52,640 --> 00:48:56,320
Speaker 1: hard work, but because it has been about just the journey,

957
00:48:56,440 --> 00:49:01,440
Speaker 1: not the destination. You're really have a clear brain, a

958
00:49:01,440 --> 00:49:04,400
Speaker 1: clear head, and you retain information very well, better than

959
00:49:04,400 --> 00:49:07,879
Speaker 1: anyone else I think I've ever met. Thank you. So

960
00:49:07,920 --> 00:49:11,960
Speaker 1: that's my takeaway, my reflections. Remember to rate, review and subscribe.

961
00:49:12,239 --> 00:49:14,080
Speaker 1: I usually do this without you here, but thank you

962
00:49:14,120 --> 00:49:17,120
Speaker 1: all so much for listening. You're amazing, Elvis, You're incredible,

963
00:49:17,200 --> 00:49:20,680
Speaker 1: and I appreciate you. Have the happiest holiday, and um

964
00:49:20,719 --> 00:49:22,799
Speaker 1: I have a happy new year. Thank you. Bethany you

965
00:49:22,840 --> 00:49:24,120
Speaker 1: were Favis. Thank you very much,