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Speaker 1: Oh John, Oh, Sam, I love you so much. I

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Speaker 1: love you almost as much as the great stories that

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Speaker 1: are about.

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Speaker 2: To come up. And you know what, I love equally

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Speaker 2: as much as the two minutes of sponsors coming up

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Speaker 2: because they support the show and make sure that we

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Speaker 2: will have her happily. Ever, after my.

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Speaker 3: Greedy sister revealed her true colors after our father passed away,

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Speaker 3: I couldn't recognize her. What color does she turn into?

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Speaker 3: She probo? She's green. My sister, thirty eight female, and

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Speaker 3: I thirty nine female, have never really gotten along. We

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Speaker 3: tolerate each other, but I do love her dearly. She's

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Speaker 3: my sister, after all. I would do anything for her,

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Speaker 3: no matter what. I always have let her know I'm here.

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Speaker 3: You're like night and day though, and that's okay. By

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Speaker 3: the way, this comes from Minimum Influence three thirteen, and

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Speaker 3: if you want to some of your own stories, go

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Speaker 3: to our slash Ooky Storytime Separated show. My dad unexpectedly

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Speaker 3: passed away in twenty twenty one. It was tough for everyone.

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Speaker 3: My grandmother his mom passed five days before him, so,

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Speaker 3: needless to say, it was a tough time for everyone. Unfortunately,

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Speaker 3: because of this, I've seen so many people's true colors

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Speaker 3: pop out when it involved money and belongings. It's broke

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Speaker 3: my heart and has caused me to distance myself for

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Speaker 3: my sister, especially, My sister has always been the type

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Speaker 3: to pop up. For instance, when our other grandma, our

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Speaker 3: mom's mom passed away about sixteen years ago, to help

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Speaker 3: go through her things or see what anyone would like

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Speaker 3: to have, this is absolutely fine. I never went though,

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Speaker 3: because I was always working and told my mom I

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Speaker 3: wasn't interested in material things. I just asked her to

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Speaker 3: let me have whatever they thought I should out of

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Speaker 3: her belongings. Let's just say that over the years from

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Speaker 3: family members who have passed away, every corner of my

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Speaker 3: sister's house has something she's gotten from them. I don't

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Speaker 3: visit her often because of this, and if she gets anything,

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Speaker 3: I don't find out until I see it at her house.

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Speaker 3: And that's okay, it's her business. I should speak up

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Speaker 3: or take what I want to, But I've never cared

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Speaker 3: for material things. To be honest, if something is sentimental,

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Speaker 3: I care, but I just don't value things like she does. Still,

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Speaker 3: I feel like it should be a mutual agreement on

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Speaker 3: who would like what, and there should be a fair

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Speaker 3: chance to split things evenly with her. There isn't. However,

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Speaker 3: I do make it a point that if I come

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Speaker 3: across something, or if I'm asked, I asked my sister

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Speaker 3: if she'd like it before I take it, I don't

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Speaker 3: really get the same treatment. It's not a big deal.

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Speaker 3: I have bigger things to worry about. It is what

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Speaker 3: it is. When my dad passed, he had a little

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Speaker 3: indoor puppy that he loved so much. My sister told everyone,

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Speaker 3: I think I should get the dog because I basically

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Speaker 3: named him. Six months later, she gave him away to

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Speaker 3: her uncle, who had just gotten out of jail, claiming

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Speaker 3: the puppy was too mild and too much work. Recently,

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Speaker 3: she got a new puppy again. Oh my god. At

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Speaker 3: my dad's funeral, my mom reminded me, while my sister

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Speaker 3: was standing right there, to make sure, as the oldest,

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Speaker 3: to tell the funeral director that I'd like the flag

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Speaker 3: they give during the service. A few minutes later, I

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Speaker 3: saw my sister walk up front with the funeral director,

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Speaker 3: looking over a piece of paper and talking. Since I

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Speaker 3: had just gotten over the bid, I hadn't been able

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Speaker 3: to meet him before the funeral, so he only knew

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Speaker 3: about me from what my mom mentioned. He was older,

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Speaker 3: so maybe he forgot. I told myself, Oh, I need

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Speaker 3: to speak to him about the flag. I walked up

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Speaker 3: and waited for them to finish talking. As I stood there,

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Speaker 3: I saw her about to sign a piece of paper.

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Speaker 3: Then the funeral director sent to her, the flag will

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Speaker 3: go to you, and she began to sign. I said

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Speaker 3: my sister's name and asked, wait, is this about the flag?

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Speaker 3: I thought I was going to get the flags and

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Speaker 3: signed the oldest. She put the pen down without saying

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Speaker 3: a word. The funeral director looked at me and asked her,

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Speaker 3: I didn't even know you had a sister. Is this

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Speaker 3: your sister? I said, yes, sir, I'm the oldest. Is

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Speaker 3: this paper about the flag and who gets it at

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Speaker 3: the service? He replied yes, ma'am, here you go. I'm

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Speaker 3: sorry about that. I told him it's no problem at

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Speaker 3: all and signed the paper. You trickster, your sister. Your

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Speaker 3: sister's a little trickster. Yeah, I'm glad you caught her.

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Speaker 3: My sister walked away without saying a word. Later I

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Speaker 3: asked her why she did that and why she didn't

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Speaker 3: tell him about me. She said, she just wasn't thinking

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Speaker 3: clearly and didn't remember what Mom had said about the

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Speaker 3: flag not even ten minutes before. We had also talked

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Speaker 3: about it a few days earlier. I understand forgetting, but

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Speaker 3: I was hurt and upset that she almost let this

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Speaker 3: happen and didn't think about me at all. Still, I

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Speaker 3: let it go and moved on. I always tried to

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Speaker 3: give the benefit of the doubt. Another example, our dad

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Speaker 3: had life insurance and I did all the emailing and

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Speaker 3: phone calls to make sure they had everything they needed.

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Speaker 3: After having to sternly tell my sister that I would

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Speaker 3: handle the life insurance policy information, she still tried her

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Speaker 3: best to take over and do it all by herself,

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Speaker 3: like she didn't trust me with it. I told her

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Speaker 3: she could help me, and that we could do it together.

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Speaker 3: We ended up filing out the paperwork together at my house.

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Speaker 3: It wasn't a one person thing anyway. She had her

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Speaker 3: own papers to fill out and I had mine, but

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Speaker 3: she still wanted to take everything to her house without

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Speaker 3: my help. I refuse to let her. Of course, there's

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Speaker 3: always a wait for life insurance payouts. About a month

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Speaker 3: and a few weeks later, I was patiently waiting to

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Speaker 3: hear something. One day, I went to my mailbox and

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Speaker 3: found a check. I called my sister to tell her

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Speaker 3: the news, and guess what her reaction was, Oh, I know,

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Speaker 3: I got me check two days ago. Giggles. I said,

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Speaker 3: what you did and you didn't even want to tell me?

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Speaker 3: Knowing I had been wondering and worrying about when we'd

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Speaker 3: hear something because of funeral expenses and everything. She paused

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Speaker 3: and said, well, I just wanted you to be surprised

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Speaker 3: when you got yours.

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Speaker 1: Why why are you loving?

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Speaker 4: What kind of face was that?

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Speaker 3: It was a face of shock. Yeah, it's my reaction.

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Speaker 3: It's a genuine's reaction.

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Speaker 5: One hand, you don't like it when I zone on. On

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Speaker 5: the other hand, when I zone in and you're not liking.

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Speaker 3: What I do, you're a hypocrite. That's when I realized

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Speaker 3: I needed to distance myself because I couldn't trust her

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Speaker 3: to be there for me the way I was for her.

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Speaker 3: It completely changed the respect I had for her. I

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Speaker 3: was hurt and disappointed in how she handled so many things.

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Speaker 3: It might not sound like a lot, but at a

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Speaker 3: time like that, it was more than I needed to

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Speaker 3: deal with. I started wondering if I was crazy. There

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Speaker 3: was no way she'd act like this with me, especially

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Speaker 3: right now. But at the same time, it wasn't surprising.

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Speaker 3: She had always done things like this before. But after

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Speaker 3: Dad passed, I really began to notice when it was

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Speaker 3: time for us to truly be there for each other.

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Speaker 3: It felt like every time I turned around, there was

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Speaker 3: some hidden agenda, something being kept for me, or just

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Speaker 3: off the wall behavior I couldn't understand. It hurt more

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Speaker 3: than usual now for some reason. My dad and mom

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Speaker 3: divorced about a year before he passed. The house they

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Speaker 3: had had together for thirty five years was going to

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Speaker 3: be hers if anything ever happened to him. They got

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Speaker 3: along fine after the divorce, and she remarried. My mom

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Speaker 3: decided to sell the house, even though it broke her

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Speaker 3: heart to do so. She felt it was for the

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Speaker 3: best because of the bad memories and how everything happened.

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Speaker 3: When my sister found out, she questioned my mom about

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Speaker 3: what our part would be if she sold it. I

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Speaker 3: never expected anything from the sale. I never even thought

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Speaker 3: about it. We had already received life insurance money. My

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Speaker 3: mom didn't. We were the beneficiaries. She got the home

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Speaker 3: and wanted to put some money away for retirement, but

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Speaker 3: my sister expected her part by law, regardless of what

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Speaker 3: my mom wanted, and that's exactly what she got. I

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Speaker 3: declined over and over to accept any amount, and told

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Speaker 3: my mom to keep my share for herself. Of course,

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Speaker 3: she didn't allow that and gave me my part too,

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Speaker 3: saying it was only fair since my sister got hers,

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Speaker 3: it felt wrong. I was very upset that my sister

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Speaker 3: pushed my mom to give give give to her. She

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Speaker 3: had no remorse, She didn't care as long as she

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Speaker 3: got what she wanted. My sister even got involved with

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Speaker 3: the realtor my mom picked like romance, calling him multiple

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Speaker 3: times to ask about her share of the sale okay,

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Speaker 3: not romantically, how much it was being sold for, and

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Speaker 3: all the financial details. Only my mom had to deal with.

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Speaker 3: The realtor hadn't even met her before these calls and

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Speaker 3: had only heard of her through my mom. When we

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Speaker 3: eventually met him to sign papers, he mentioned that she

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Speaker 3: had called him multiple times about money questions and that

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Speaker 3: he felt uncomfortable not telling my mom. My sister never

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Speaker 3: once mentioned to my mom that she had done this.

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Speaker 3: Once she finally got her money from the house, she

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Speaker 3: was happy. She acted like nothing had happened and went

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Speaker 3: back to talking to my mom as if all was well.

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Speaker 3: Then she had the nerve to ask my mom how

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Speaker 3: much she got from the sale, and was shocked that

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Speaker 3: my mom got more than her. It blew my mind.

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Speaker 3: My mom was hurt and disappointed too, but she didn't

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Speaker 3: hold it against my sister or confront her. My mom

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Speaker 3: doesn't fight over money with family. She always says, if

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Speaker 3: we have it, we should give it if we can.

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Speaker 3: She wanted to make sure her two daughters were okay financially,

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Speaker 3: and I understood that, but we got the life insurance money.

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Speaker 3: We did not need this too. My mom worked for

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Speaker 3: that home or raising us in it for thirty years,

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Speaker 3: and my sister had her hand out expecting something from it.

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Speaker 3: The entitlement blew my mind. We were never raised that way,

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Speaker 3: but I hope that you guys were raised to listen

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Speaker 3: to full episodes with stories just like this. Just go

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Speaker 3: to Apple podcast, Spotify or your favorite podcast app and

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Speaker 3: search a bookcase storytime.

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Speaker 4: Stuids Angie, what are your thoughts about the story.

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Speaker 3: I thought, that's crazy.

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Speaker 6: I love These things are just hard.

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Speaker 7: I've never personally had to deal with like a will

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Speaker 7: or anything like that From the people in my family

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Speaker 7: and in my life that I've seen, it always like

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Speaker 7: things get messy and people get selfish with the things

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Speaker 7: that they want, and it's like, okay, we got to

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Speaker 7: think about everyone here.

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Speaker 3: I just have everything.

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Speaker 5: Because honestly, if she wanted to take all the stuff

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Speaker 5: back to her house, obviously she was gonna like take

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Speaker 5: you know, everything that she wanted.

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Speaker 3: So good thing that didn't let her.

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Speaker 5: I bet that even if she did take everything that

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Speaker 5: she wanted, she wouldn't even like appreciate it or keep it. Yeah,

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Speaker 5: she would just get her grubby little hands on it.

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Speaker 3: That's crazy. Am I the al for distancing myself from

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Speaker 3: my sister after all this? It hurts it's my sister.

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Speaker 3: And yes, actually I have sat down with my sister

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Speaker 3: and told her all of this bothers me as I expected,

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Speaker 3: there was an excuse for everything I said to her.

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Speaker 3: She hit mean it that way, or knew it didn't

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Speaker 3: happen that way, or she just wasn't thinking and didn't

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Speaker 3: realize she did that. It's never taking responsibility or maybe

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Speaker 3: realizing hey, maybe you're right, I'm sorry for hurting you.

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Speaker 3: That will never happen. I know for a fact, I'm

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Speaker 3: just hurt at how this all happened. It breaks my

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Speaker 3: heart that people put material things and money before family

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Speaker 3: and the entitlement these days blows my freaking mind. And

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Speaker 3: it blows my mind.

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Speaker 5: Man, maybe it's just some distance for a little bit

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Speaker 5: will help, and then she can come back and then

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Speaker 5: maybe she'll calm down.

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Speaker 3: Sign her up for Survivor. She's like what, but you

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Speaker 3: sign her up and she gets on and she's like,

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Speaker 3: I didn't sign up for Survivor and you're like, yeah,

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Speaker 3: of course she did.

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Speaker 1: You did.

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Speaker 3: But then you tell her, You're like, oh, you have

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Speaker 3: a chance to win big. And so she goes on

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Speaker 3: this like literally like forty five day. She's half starving,

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Speaker 3: she's doing like crazy challenges. She comes back just entirely sunburned,

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Speaker 3: but she's had like a huge change of heart. And

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Speaker 3: she's like, on that trip when I was having to

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Speaker 3: manipulate people and get manipulated back, I realized that I

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Speaker 3: was the problem all the time.

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Speaker 5: Wow, does that happen on Survivor?

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Speaker 3: People realize that they're a bad person. But I feel

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Speaker 3: like she would.

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Speaker 6: I spent my childhood babysitting for my sister.

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Speaker 5: The kids started calling me mom, uh oh.

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Speaker 3: This seems problematic.

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Speaker 5: I'm an eighteen year old female and I have an

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Speaker 5: older sister twenty nine who has two children, ages eight

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Speaker 5: and four. Most of my childhood was spent taking care

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Speaker 5: of her children while she went on to parties and such.

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Speaker 5: Now that I'm going off to do a course in

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Speaker 5: practical nursing to boost my resume for university, she's asking

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Speaker 5: me to put my future on hold and look after

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Speaker 5: her children so that she can enjoy herself before I

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Speaker 5: leave for university. By the way, this comes from best

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Speaker 5: Question seventy nine point forty and if you want to

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Speaker 5: submit your.

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Speaker 6: Own stories, just go to the our slash Okay story

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Speaker 6: time separated it.

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Speaker 3: So your sister is taking away from your ability to

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Speaker 3: have child's teenager experiences.

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Speaker 5: Thing is my mom warned me when I was young

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Speaker 5: not to babysit or look after her children because of

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Speaker 5: her attitude.

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Speaker 3: I didn't listen.

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Speaker 5: She also said that this might be my sister being

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Speaker 5: jealous because she used to go to nursing school but

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Speaker 5: made friends with the wrong group in the end, and

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Speaker 5: then she didn't pass her final exam, so she dropped

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Speaker 5: out of school. So everything came to a head yesterday

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Speaker 5: because applications for the course started yesterday. When I was

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Speaker 5: talking to our mom about it, my sister heard that

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Speaker 5: I applied. She got upset and started shouting about how

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Speaker 5: selfish I am and how this is the only thing

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Speaker 5: she's ever asked me to do, like I didn't spend

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Speaker 5: my whole childhood from age eleven to now, looking after

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Speaker 5: and taking care of her children. I told her to

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Speaker 5: stop being childish and that it isn't my fault that

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Speaker 5: she had children and I am not their mother. The

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Speaker 5: children call me mom, they did for about two years,

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Speaker 5: even when corrected, and they still call me mom. Apparently

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Speaker 5: I should have said this sooner. She started yelling at

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Speaker 5: our mom, saying that I'm her favorite, because if I wasn't,

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Speaker 5: she would tell me to put my future aside and

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Speaker 5: help her with her children. Our mom told her point

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Speaker 5: blank that she would never tell any of us to

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Speaker 5: put our future on hold. She said she gave us

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Speaker 5: all the same opportunity and it's not anyone's fault that

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Speaker 5: she didn't use hers wisely. Now she has children, and

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Speaker 5: I'm going to take my life more seriously.

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Speaker 3: She needs to take responsibility for.

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Speaker 5: Her children because no one told her to have them

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Speaker 5: and she can't look after them. She started crying and left.

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Speaker 5: Then my mom started yelling at me, saying that she

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Speaker 5: warned me from the very beginning.

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Speaker 3: And I didn't listen.

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Speaker 5: She said that I need to stop being a pushover

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Speaker 5: because of lost my whole childhood. When I was supposed

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Speaker 5: to be outside, playing with my friends, going out and

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Speaker 5: just being a kid, I was babysitting like I gave earth.

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Speaker 5: She said, it's my fault. My sister became so entitled

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Speaker 5: because when she made plans for me to go out,

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Speaker 5: I would cancel to watch the children.

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Speaker 6: She's not wrong.

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Speaker 3: I would always feel sorry for my sister because she.

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Speaker 5: Knew how to manipulate me, just because I don't like

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Speaker 5: to see people suffer or be sad. Sorry for the

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Speaker 5: long post. I just want to know if I'm the

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Speaker 5: whole for not putting my future on hold. Thank you

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00:13:28,160 --> 00:13:30,400
Speaker 5: for all the support and kind words. It has been

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Speaker 5: eye opening. So yesterday, after my sister left crying, she

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Speaker 5: didn't come home immediately. She waited for her kids' school

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Speaker 5: to be dismissed to pick them up. I know I

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Speaker 5: should have expected her to try and poison them against me,

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Speaker 5: but I really wanted to.

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Speaker 6: Give her the benefit of the doubt that she wouldn't

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Speaker 6: stoop that low.

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Speaker 3: When they came home, the children were crying.

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Speaker 5: They ran up to me asking me not to hate them,

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Speaker 5: and that broke me. My niece went into a panic

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Speaker 5: attack because when she gets overwhelmed, she starts having panic attacks.

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Speaker 5: I've brought her to a doctor before and she was

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Speaker 5: dying nose with ADHD and anxiety. So it takes a

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Speaker 5: lot of my energy to calm her and down. As

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Speaker 5: someone with ADHD as well, she's just like me. For real, dude,

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Speaker 5: for real, me too. We see you, We're with you,

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Speaker 5: we are you. Oh my gosh. I asked my mom

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Speaker 5: to take the kids to my room, as that's the

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00:14:15,840 --> 00:14:19,160
Speaker 5: only place they feel safe when they're overwhelmed. Wow, her

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00:14:19,320 --> 00:14:22,640
Speaker 5: room is the only place that they feel safe. Again, insanity.

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Speaker 5: After they were out of earshot, I went off on

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Speaker 5: my sister. I became a little personal with some of

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Speaker 5: the things I said, But here's the gist of it.

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Speaker 3: When will you grow up?

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Speaker 5: You've had seven to eight years to run around, party

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Speaker 5: and do as you please, while I've been raising your

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00:14:39,040 --> 00:14:42,280
Speaker 5: children to the point where they call me, Mom, When

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Speaker 5: will you wake up and be the best mother to

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Speaker 5: your children instead of going out drinking and jumping from

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Speaker 5: one man to another. I'm sick and tired of you.

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00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:53,800
Speaker 5: I'm not putting my life on hold for you. I've

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00:14:53,840 --> 00:14:56,600
Speaker 5: done enough for you. I love the kids, but as

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00:14:56,640 --> 00:14:59,760
Speaker 5: the only sensible role model they have, I do this

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00:14:59,760 --> 00:15:03,280
Speaker 5: to show them it's okay to leave people behind. So

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00:15:03,560 --> 00:15:06,080
Speaker 5: get your crap together and be the best mother you

344
00:15:06,160 --> 00:15:09,520
Speaker 5: can to those kids, because they're amazing. Do you think

345
00:15:09,560 --> 00:15:12,000
Speaker 5: dealing with two children who have ADHD and are on

346
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Speaker 5: the spectrum is easy?

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Speaker 6: It's not.

348
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Speaker 5: But I did do it without any help from anyone,

349
00:15:17,320 --> 00:15:20,080
Speaker 5: not even mom because she was always working. And I

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00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:22,960
Speaker 5: can't really blame her because my dad passed and she

351
00:15:23,120 --> 00:15:25,360
Speaker 5: was the only one there to work and provide for

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Speaker 5: my younger brother and me. So yeah, I basically raised

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Speaker 5: three kids from age eleven till now, and that's going

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Speaker 5: to change.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 3: Good on you, man, stand up for yourself and this

357
00:15:38,760 --> 00:15:41,800
Speaker 3: is us, says big Bob. Boom boom boom bob Bam.

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Speaker 6: Big Bob boom boom boom bob Bam wouldn't stand.

359
00:15:45,240 --> 00:15:47,480
Speaker 5: I left her in the living room and called Tony

360
00:15:47,520 --> 00:15:51,040
Speaker 5: and James, my nibbling's father. I explained the situation, and

361
00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:53,000
Speaker 5: I told them it's time for them to be a

362
00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:55,920
Speaker 5: part of their children's lives. But like they can't just

363
00:15:56,040 --> 00:15:59,400
Speaker 5: send child sport because children need their parents for proper development.

364
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:02,760
Speaker 5: Thirty four year old brother Josh called mom and told

365
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Speaker 5: her to have me pack my bags and move in

366
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:07,280
Speaker 5: with him until my program started. I'm going to write

367
00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:10,160
Speaker 5: letters for my nibblings so that their mom doesn't cause

368
00:16:10,240 --> 00:16:13,080
Speaker 5: any more damage. I've made a list of things they like,

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Speaker 5: how to get them to take their medicine, and how

370
00:16:15,280 --> 00:16:17,680
Speaker 5: to calm them down. I even have a scrap book

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00:16:17,720 --> 00:16:19,520
Speaker 5: of all of our moments for each of them. I

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Speaker 5: did later explain to them that I'll always love them.

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Speaker 3: I'm worried.

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Speaker 5: Even though I taught my niece how to take care

375
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Speaker 5: of herself and her brother, I don't want to repeat

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00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:31,120
Speaker 5: up my upbringing. They deserve way more than that. My

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00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:33,760
Speaker 5: mom also apologized for neglecting me and not being a

378
00:16:33,760 --> 00:16:36,760
Speaker 5: good mom. I've forgiven her. Later, after I helped my

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00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:39,480
Speaker 5: nibblings with their homework, I bathed them and put them

380
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Speaker 5: to bed and started my homework.

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Speaker 6: My sister came into my room asking if we could talk.

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Speaker 3: I said yes. She apologized, Interesting, yes she did.

383
00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:51,040
Speaker 5: She said that she was jealous that I didn't make

384
00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:53,800
Speaker 5: any wrong decisions, and she's going to send the kids

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Speaker 5: to their father while she gets into rehab and therapy

386
00:16:56,280 --> 00:16:58,800
Speaker 5: because her behavior isn't normal and she's going to try

387
00:16:58,840 --> 00:17:01,160
Speaker 5: to be the best mother she can. She thanks me

388
00:17:01,240 --> 00:17:03,640
Speaker 5: for everything I did for her and the kids. By

389
00:17:03,680 --> 00:17:05,679
Speaker 5: the way, we would always thank you for everything that

390
00:17:05,720 --> 00:17:08,040
Speaker 5: you did if what you did is listen to full

391
00:17:08,080 --> 00:17:12,120
Speaker 5: episodes with more stories just like this one on iHeartRadio, Spotify,

392
00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:15,879
Speaker 5: Apple Podcasts, where your favorite podcast app is Sister Okay

393
00:17:15,880 --> 00:17:18,080
Speaker 5: story Time and you'll find us.

394
00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:20,359
Speaker 3: We'll be right there waiting for you. There's a little

395
00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:21,320
Speaker 3: bit more to this story.

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Speaker 5: But oh my gosh, she like actually apologized finally. Yeah,

397
00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:27,760
Speaker 5: and it's like a real full apology and it's not

398
00:17:27,840 --> 00:17:32,119
Speaker 5: some sort of like backhanded insults or arguments. No, this

399
00:17:32,280 --> 00:17:34,400
Speaker 5: was like a this is why it happened, and I'm

400
00:17:34,440 --> 00:17:37,720
Speaker 5: sorry it happened, and she's like making the right choices.

401
00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:38,600
Speaker 3: To fix it. Finally.

402
00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:41,439
Speaker 5: I was crying at this point. I guess she just

403
00:17:41,520 --> 00:17:43,680
Speaker 5: realized how hurt the kids are. When she told them

404
00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:45,679
Speaker 5: that I hated them and that I was leaving. I

405
00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:48,920
Speaker 5: told her that she's forgiven, but not fully. She has

406
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:51,560
Speaker 5: to show me that she will change. She hugged me,

407
00:17:51,720 --> 00:17:54,639
Speaker 5: and I guess this is a start. Even though it's small,

408
00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:57,359
Speaker 5: it's still a chain. Let's see how long it will last.

409
00:17:57,680 --> 00:18:00,000
Speaker 5: I'm trying to get into therapy, but I'm on away.

410
00:18:00,560 --> 00:18:03,439
Speaker 5: The earliest appointment available is in nine months, which is

411
00:18:03,440 --> 00:18:04,640
Speaker 5: a start, I suppose.

412
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Speaker 3: Once again, thank you all for the support.

413
00:18:08,280 --> 00:18:09,080
Speaker 1: Oh my goodness.

414
00:18:09,160 --> 00:18:11,359
Speaker 3: But yeah, that's the end of that story. That was

415
00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:14,440
Speaker 3: kind of crazy. Yeah, I mean really big turnaround. Yeah,

416
00:18:14,520 --> 00:18:17,560
Speaker 3: they actually responded. They actually self reflected. You don't see that.

417
00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:21,040
Speaker 5: A lot began actions that proved that self reflection, and

418
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Speaker 5: we like to see that.

419
00:18:22,160 --> 00:18:23,640
Speaker 4: All right, we got one.

420
00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:25,719
Speaker 3: Oh we have a caller. Oh I suh. I've never

421
00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:27,760
Speaker 3: had a collar on you before. I've never been here.

422
00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:30,400
Speaker 4: Let me get their names going.

423
00:18:30,680 --> 00:18:33,560
Speaker 6: Hello, Oh my gosh, this is so cool.

424
00:18:33,920 --> 00:18:37,720
Speaker 3: Hi is this Tia? Hello, Tia, welcome, welcome.

425
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Speaker 6: So we hear you have a crazy Valentine's Day story.

426
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Speaker 8: I do so. It's my first Valentine's date in probably

427
00:18:47,080 --> 00:18:49,920
Speaker 8: ten years, first one after my marriage ended, and I've

428
00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:52,080
Speaker 8: gone out with the guy a couple of times. Nice guy.

429
00:18:52,160 --> 00:18:54,680
Speaker 8: So Valentine's Day, he says, come on over, we'll watch

430
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Speaker 8: a movie.

431
00:18:55,160 --> 00:18:55,520
Speaker 1: Okay.

432
00:18:55,720 --> 00:18:58,080
Speaker 8: So first he doesn't tell me that he lives in

433
00:18:58,200 --> 00:19:01,159
Speaker 8: a rooming house that has no furnature in it, that

434
00:19:01,280 --> 00:19:03,359
Speaker 8: he shares with three other guys on the top floor

435
00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:04,520
Speaker 8: and seven in the basement.

436
00:19:04,800 --> 00:19:05,119
Speaker 1: Whoa.

437
00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:08,959
Speaker 8: But I'm like, okay, okay, I'm not gonna judge. So

438
00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:10,960
Speaker 8: we go to his room and you know, we got

439
00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:13,840
Speaker 8: all cuddle them on the bed and flipping through the

440
00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:16,240
Speaker 8: iPad looking for a show to watch. You know how

441
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:17,879
Speaker 8: you get that little tickle on your arm when your

442
00:19:17,880 --> 00:19:20,919
Speaker 8: hair kind of brushes against your arm. Yeah, so I

443
00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:22,680
Speaker 8: look down and I had a little bug on my

444
00:19:22,800 --> 00:19:26,080
Speaker 8: arm and I went oh, And he goes, oh, that's okay,

445
00:19:26,119 --> 00:19:29,640
Speaker 8: and he smacks it and it bleeds, and when lead red.

446
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:31,560
Speaker 8: They've been snacking on something.

447
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:32,240
Speaker 1: Guys.

448
00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:35,400
Speaker 8: I swear to you, I have never gotten up off

449
00:19:35,760 --> 00:19:38,960
Speaker 8: a bed so fast in my life. That iPad went flying,

450
00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:41,520
Speaker 8: and he looks, it's not bed bugs, not bed bugs.

451
00:19:41,560 --> 00:19:43,000
Speaker 8: So I grab him and I whip him around and

452
00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:45,640
Speaker 8: I whip up his shirt and he's covered in bites. No,

453
00:19:46,119 --> 00:19:48,879
Speaker 8: and he's still telling me it's not bad bugs. So

454
00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:52,080
Speaker 8: I rip all the blankets back and oh, it was

455
00:19:52,119 --> 00:19:53,119
Speaker 8: an infestation.

456
00:19:54,160 --> 00:19:55,199
Speaker 3: Stop it.

457
00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:59,760
Speaker 8: His bed was covered in these bugs.

458
00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:02,320
Speaker 3: Oh my god. And he's sleeping on them.

459
00:20:02,600 --> 00:20:04,120
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, he was covered in them.

460
00:20:04,480 --> 00:20:07,320
Speaker 8: So I fly out the door. I've never ran so

461
00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:09,240
Speaker 8: fast in my life. And I get my car and

462
00:20:09,280 --> 00:20:12,200
Speaker 8: I have a sense of humor. So I get two

463
00:20:12,280 --> 00:20:14,680
Speaker 8: blocks away and my humor kicks in and I'm howling

464
00:20:14,680 --> 00:20:17,960
Speaker 8: with laughter. So I get on I'm watching you guys.

465
00:20:18,080 --> 00:20:20,119
Speaker 8: I pull over and I do a voice call with

466
00:20:20,160 --> 00:20:23,200
Speaker 8: all my girlfriends. I'm telling what's happening. I'm howling with laughter.

467
00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:25,400
Speaker 8: I'm like, You're not gonna believe this. He had bed bugs.

468
00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:26,360
Speaker 8: This is the worst.

469
00:20:26,440 --> 00:20:27,320
Speaker 3: I call my babysitter.

470
00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:30,000
Speaker 8: I say, you need to turn off the lights, put

471
00:20:30,040 --> 00:20:33,280
Speaker 8: a garbage bag on the porch and just leave it

472
00:20:33,359 --> 00:20:33,600
Speaker 8: like that.

473
00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:35,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, because you can't go inside. No.

474
00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:37,840
Speaker 8: No, So this is one of the coldest februaries we had.

475
00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:40,199
Speaker 8: It was about minus fifty ish celsius.

476
00:20:40,520 --> 00:20:42,080
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh.

477
00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:45,080
Speaker 8: And I get home and I'm standing on my porch.

478
00:20:45,600 --> 00:20:50,240
Speaker 8: I stripped down to everything. I am literally standing on

479
00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:56,360
Speaker 8: my front porch, things swinging in the air, everything's out, and.

480
00:20:56,400 --> 00:20:57,320
Speaker 1: My neighbor pulls up.

481
00:20:57,600 --> 00:21:00,960
Speaker 3: No, she goes, hey, how you do it? Oh? Stop it?

482
00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:02,359
Speaker 8: How you do And I'm like, don't want to talk

483
00:21:02,359 --> 00:21:04,040
Speaker 8: about it? Should I bring some wine over? I'm like,

484
00:21:04,040 --> 00:21:06,000
Speaker 8: bring it in two days, don't bring it now?

485
00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:06,360
Speaker 1: Yeah.

486
00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:06,840
Speaker 3: Yeah.

487
00:21:06,880 --> 00:21:08,360
Speaker 1: So I shove all my stuff in.

488
00:21:08,359 --> 00:21:11,160
Speaker 8: This big garbage bag and I leave it outside because

489
00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:13,399
Speaker 8: it's minus fifty everything's in a freeze. It doesn't matter, right,

490
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:15,880
Speaker 8: what matters because it was so gross. And of course

491
00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:17,080
Speaker 8: the last thing I did before I went to the

492
00:21:17,080 --> 00:21:19,720
Speaker 8: house is I took a little little picture from my

493
00:21:19,720 --> 00:21:20,920
Speaker 8: girlfriends and sent it to.

494
00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:22,119
Speaker 3: Them, and I'm like, yeah, look.

495
00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:25,280
Speaker 8: And I walk in the house and my babysitter looks

496
00:21:25,280 --> 00:21:25,560
Speaker 8: at me.

497
00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:29,240
Speaker 6: And of course I of course she goes, what happened?

498
00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:31,000
Speaker 8: I don't want to talk about it, and she says,

499
00:21:31,080 --> 00:21:32,640
Speaker 8: I just need to know if I just helped cover

500
00:21:32,760 --> 00:21:34,840
Speaker 8: up a crime, because I don't trust you. And I said,

501
00:21:35,040 --> 00:21:37,560
Speaker 8: it's not a crime yet, but I need to shower.

502
00:21:37,680 --> 00:21:41,480
Speaker 8: So I went from minus fifty three freezing outside to

503
00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:43,920
Speaker 8: like scalding.

504
00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:46,360
Speaker 3: Hot water and were days afterwards.

505
00:21:46,400 --> 00:21:50,600
Speaker 8: Every single tickle, every single touch I tore my bed

506
00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:51,920
Speaker 8: apart for two weeks just.

507
00:21:51,800 --> 00:21:53,680
Speaker 3: To make sure, Oh my goodness.

508
00:21:53,760 --> 00:21:55,919
Speaker 8: And I left my clothes outside for three days, and

509
00:21:55,960 --> 00:22:00,520
Speaker 8: my neighbor brought wine. So my first Valentine's date in years,

510
00:22:00,960 --> 00:22:03,359
Speaker 8: the first one since my X and I split up,

511
00:22:03,400 --> 00:22:04,800
Speaker 8: I'm gonna had bug bugs.

512
00:22:05,200 --> 00:22:08,119
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh. The thing is when you said that, like,

513
00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:11,040
Speaker 3: as you got bit I thought mosquito first, but his

514
00:22:11,160 --> 00:22:14,800
Speaker 3: immediate reaction of it's not bed bugs is so suspicious.

515
00:22:15,240 --> 00:22:18,240
Speaker 5: Yeah, and the fact he wasn't even like, oh yeah,

516
00:22:18,240 --> 00:22:19,000
Speaker 5: I forgot.

517
00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:21,320
Speaker 6: To tell you. He's like, oh, it's no problem, just

518
00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:22,320
Speaker 6: kill it, just kill it.

519
00:22:22,359 --> 00:22:23,960
Speaker 3: Walt's on you and drinking your blood.

520
00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:24,439
Speaker 1: It's fine.

521
00:22:24,520 --> 00:22:26,440
Speaker 3: No, no, no, I have such a big bed bug

522
00:22:26,520 --> 00:22:29,720
Speaker 3: problem because when I was traveling, France had a huge

523
00:22:29,720 --> 00:22:32,840
Speaker 3: bedbug problem. So I'm always just very aware of bedbugs. Now,

524
00:22:32,960 --> 00:22:34,120
Speaker 3: that was a crazy story.

525
00:22:34,320 --> 00:22:36,920
Speaker 8: He was confinsd that couldn't be bedbugs because he quote

526
00:22:36,960 --> 00:22:37,920
Speaker 8: didn't feel any.

527
00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:41,640
Speaker 3: Bites, but he was covered in bites but his back covered.

528
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:42,879
Speaker 3: And then he got mad at me afterwards.

529
00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:44,560
Speaker 1: I wouldn't go back over that's on him.

530
00:22:44,680 --> 00:22:46,240
Speaker 3: I would be like, it seems like you're in a

531
00:22:46,280 --> 00:22:50,320
Speaker 3: polyamorous relationship with your bed bugs. That is crazy.

532
00:22:50,760 --> 00:22:54,320
Speaker 4: Oh my godh Dia, thank you for calling crazy story.

533
00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:57,400
Speaker 3: It's absolutely hilarious. I still have that picture. My friends

534
00:22:57,440 --> 00:22:59,199
Speaker 3: still laugh about that. That's so funny.

535
00:22:59,640 --> 00:23:00,440
Speaker 8: Thanks.

536
00:23:00,600 --> 00:23:02,720
Speaker 3: I have a good night. See you back in the chat.

537
00:23:03,080 --> 00:23:05,919
Speaker 3: That man clearly didn't listen. He just would sleep tight

538
00:23:05,960 --> 00:23:08,800
Speaker 3: and he left those bed bug but he did. My

539
00:23:09,040 --> 00:23:12,479
Speaker 3: sister ruined my honeymoon and my husband sided with her.

540
00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:14,240
Speaker 3: I thought a husband and wife were supposed to be

541
00:23:14,280 --> 00:23:18,000
Speaker 3: a team short marriage. I try and keep thisses, show

542
00:23:18,080 --> 00:23:22,359
Speaker 3: it as possible while giving the important details. We rented

543
00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:24,359
Speaker 3: a cabin for our honeymoon, to which my sister in

544
00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:27,240
Speaker 3: law and her best friend were already coming along. My

545
00:23:27,320 --> 00:23:29,760
Speaker 3: husband got the idea to invite my sister and her

546
00:23:29,800 --> 00:23:31,960
Speaker 3: young son, and we paid for them to fly home

547
00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:34,480
Speaker 3: so they could stay longer after the wedding. By the way,

548
00:23:34,560 --> 00:23:37,239
Speaker 3: this comes from Mammoth Showers sixteen nine sixteen and if

549
00:23:37,280 --> 00:23:38,600
Speaker 3: you want to submit your own stories, good to our

550
00:23:38,640 --> 00:23:41,800
Speaker 3: slash Okay storytime severed it so it was six days

551
00:23:41,840 --> 00:23:45,120
Speaker 3: after the wedding, day five at the cabin when everything

552
00:23:45,160 --> 00:23:48,439
Speaker 3: went sideway. My sister got sick. The day before, and

553
00:23:48,480 --> 00:23:50,560
Speaker 3: we were helping with her son, but still going out

554
00:23:50,600 --> 00:23:53,359
Speaker 3: and enjoying ourselves as it was our honeymoon. We left

555
00:23:53,359 --> 00:23:55,960
Speaker 3: her for a few hours at a time and even

556
00:23:55,960 --> 00:23:58,280
Speaker 3: asked on occasion if she wanted us to take her son,

557
00:23:58,359 --> 00:24:00,720
Speaker 3: but she never had him ready to take a kid

558
00:24:00,760 --> 00:24:03,200
Speaker 3: still in diapers out without a go bag. It's also

559
00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:05,120
Speaker 3: not realistic to take a child down to a hot

560
00:24:05,160 --> 00:24:08,480
Speaker 3: dock without a swimsuit, sunscreened water, and a hat, et cetera.

561
00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:10,400
Speaker 3: We went down to the dock to swim and get

562
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:13,040
Speaker 3: some sun. I started getting messages from my sister about

563
00:24:13,080 --> 00:24:15,560
Speaker 3: her husband, who was at work, being mad that their

564
00:24:15,640 --> 00:24:18,600
Speaker 3: child was locked inside all day. However, anyone who had

565
00:24:18,680 --> 00:24:21,000
Speaker 3: us on Facebook even commented on the amount he was

566
00:24:21,040 --> 00:24:23,680
Speaker 3: outside playing with us, as we posted lots of photos

567
00:24:23,680 --> 00:24:26,840
Speaker 3: with him. From there, things escalated. I went up to

568
00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:29,679
Speaker 3: the cabin to try and figure out what was going on.

569
00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:32,760
Speaker 3: She started yelling at me about just leaving her with

570
00:24:32,800 --> 00:24:35,359
Speaker 3: her son when she was sick. I stated that we

571
00:24:35,520 --> 00:24:38,520
Speaker 3: offered to take him, to which she declined. I then

572
00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:40,240
Speaker 3: told her that all she had to do was ask,

573
00:24:40,359 --> 00:24:42,720
Speaker 3: to which she told me no, she shouldn't have to ask.

574
00:24:42,880 --> 00:24:45,560
Speaker 3: We should just do it. There should be mind readers.

575
00:24:46,080 --> 00:24:49,480
Speaker 3: This is where I may have reacted poorly. She is

576
00:24:49,520 --> 00:24:51,680
Speaker 3: not talking to my uncle due to a situation that

577
00:24:51,800 --> 00:24:55,360
Speaker 3: started from her having expectations, not voicing them, and then

578
00:24:55,400 --> 00:24:57,840
Speaker 3: blowing up on him. My brother and she were just

579
00:24:57,880 --> 00:25:01,040
Speaker 3: rekindling their relationship due to the same reason. I told

580
00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:03,600
Speaker 3: her that she needs to stop having expectations of people

581
00:25:03,640 --> 00:25:07,720
Speaker 3: without voicing them, then freaking out when those expectations don't happen.

582
00:25:07,880 --> 00:25:10,840
Speaker 3: I told her that that is exactly why my brother

583
00:25:10,880 --> 00:25:13,480
Speaker 3: has minimal contact with her and my uncle has zero

584
00:25:13,600 --> 00:25:16,280
Speaker 3: contact with her. I grabbed her son and went down

585
00:25:16,280 --> 00:25:19,120
Speaker 3: to the dock, and realizing how ill prepared we were

586
00:25:19,119 --> 00:25:20,640
Speaker 3: to have a three year old in the open sun,

587
00:25:21,119 --> 00:25:24,479
Speaker 3: I messaged her husband explaining the situation and he brushed

588
00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:27,200
Speaker 3: it off as she has anxiety. My sister in law

589
00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:29,520
Speaker 3: and her best friend started making comments about how if

590
00:25:29,520 --> 00:25:31,399
Speaker 3: she was gonna be like that, she was not welcome

591
00:25:31,440 --> 00:25:34,080
Speaker 3: to stay, to which I agreed. I tried to give

592
00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:37,960
Speaker 3: her time knowing my sister, but my husband started telling

593
00:25:37,960 --> 00:25:39,960
Speaker 3: me I had to make things right no matter what

594
00:25:40,119 --> 00:25:42,959
Speaker 3: it took. I tried to apologize many times, but she

595
00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:46,119
Speaker 3: ignored me. She started messaging me saying things like, if

596
00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:47,960
Speaker 3: you're gonna trap me here in the middle of nowhere

597
00:25:47,960 --> 00:25:50,320
Speaker 3: and tell me everyone hates me, you could have just

598
00:25:50,359 --> 00:25:53,280
Speaker 3: done it. When I was at home. Rather than arguing

599
00:25:53,320 --> 00:25:55,800
Speaker 3: about what was said, I went against my better judgment

600
00:25:55,840 --> 00:25:58,200
Speaker 3: and said I'm sorry for what I said out of anger.

601
00:25:58,320 --> 00:26:00,399
Speaker 3: I shouldn't have said it. She made a comment about

602
00:26:00,400 --> 00:26:02,480
Speaker 3: being in a mood for the next three days until

603
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:04,760
Speaker 3: she leaves, which I knew meant she would keep her

604
00:26:04,760 --> 00:26:06,520
Speaker 3: mood in attitude for the rest of the trip.

605
00:26:06,760 --> 00:26:09,119
Speaker 4: Don't you hate it when people just have an attitude?

606
00:26:09,320 --> 00:26:10,919
Speaker 4: Why what did I ever do to you?

607
00:26:11,080 --> 00:26:11,280
Speaker 1: Yeah?

608
00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:13,800
Speaker 3: Why are you in a tude? You're so right about that, girl,

609
00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:15,960
Speaker 3: I've never been in a tude. I told her she

610
00:26:16,000 --> 00:26:17,720
Speaker 3: could take the night to get a good night's sleep

611
00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 3: and get her head on straight, but if she didn't

612
00:26:20,080 --> 00:26:22,439
Speaker 3: snap out of the mood, my husband would give her

613
00:26:22,480 --> 00:26:24,679
Speaker 3: a ride to a hotel for the rest of her stay.

614
00:26:25,200 --> 00:26:28,080
Speaker 3: She immediately responded that she would take the ride now

615
00:26:28,119 --> 00:26:29,960
Speaker 3: and leave. You would think that would be the end,

616
00:26:30,040 --> 00:26:34,040
Speaker 3: but no. Apparently my sister realized that a last minute

617
00:26:34,040 --> 00:26:37,520
Speaker 3: hotel at the location would be two thousand plus dollars.

618
00:26:37,840 --> 00:26:38,680
Speaker 6: Hey yy yy.

619
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:42,320
Speaker 3: My husband came back saying my sister was staying and

620
00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:44,520
Speaker 3: yelling at me in front of his sister and her friend.

621
00:26:44,760 --> 00:26:46,560
Speaker 3: I don't know what my sister told him I said,

622
00:26:46,920 --> 00:26:49,359
Speaker 3: but she showed him the message where I apologize for

623
00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:51,359
Speaker 3: what I said. I tried to explain to him that

624
00:26:51,440 --> 00:26:53,679
Speaker 3: keeping her there was a horrible idea and that he

625
00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:56,600
Speaker 3: didn't know the past or history with her. She had

626
00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:59,360
Speaker 3: to go. It was the only option. In the end,

627
00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:02,240
Speaker 3: I actually landed up leaving. I drove my Beater as

628
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:05,280
Speaker 3: I have been rear ended two weeks before the wedding,

629
00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:07,800
Speaker 3: making my good car unsafe to drive, so I bought

630
00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:10,280
Speaker 3: a Beater to get through through a sketchy mountain pass

631
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:13,160
Speaker 3: with zero cell photes at reception at eleven pm. Why

632
00:27:13,280 --> 00:27:16,480
Speaker 3: is your husband yelling at you? Yeah, you should never

633
00:27:16,520 --> 00:27:20,240
Speaker 3: be yelling at your party. No yelling is uncalled for.

634
00:27:20,640 --> 00:27:23,320
Speaker 4: I think that the husband likes the sister or has

635
00:27:23,359 --> 00:27:24,439
Speaker 4: like the sister in the past.

636
00:27:24,720 --> 00:27:27,359
Speaker 3: There is a lot of trauma revolving around my sister

637
00:27:27,480 --> 00:27:29,560
Speaker 3: that I thought we were past, but it was all

638
00:27:29,600 --> 00:27:32,480
Speaker 3: brought back up. Plus I was on hormones for fertility

639
00:27:32,480 --> 00:27:36,080
Speaker 3: treatment and I'm bipolar, but normally well medicated. Driving home,

640
00:27:36,160 --> 00:27:38,439
Speaker 3: seeing the way my husband just sided with my sister,

641
00:27:38,800 --> 00:27:40,680
Speaker 3: never getting my side of the story or letting me

642
00:27:40,760 --> 00:27:43,639
Speaker 3: tell it, mixed with everything else, I started getting thoughts

643
00:27:43,640 --> 00:27:46,679
Speaker 3: of driving off the cliff or into a barricade. Ooh,

644
00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:49,000
Speaker 3: I hope you're okay. When I got home, I dropped

645
00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:50,679
Speaker 3: my dog off and made the decision to go to

646
00:27:50,720 --> 00:27:53,359
Speaker 3: the psych word for an evaluation. I was released within

647
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:55,919
Speaker 3: eight hours, as they agreed it was hormones mixed with

648
00:27:56,000 --> 00:27:58,719
Speaker 3: a lot happening. They just gave me something to sleep,

649
00:27:58,800 --> 00:28:00,920
Speaker 3: as they deemed my normal medad. It's good for normal

650
00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:03,160
Speaker 3: day to day life. My husband took twenty four hours

651
00:28:03,200 --> 00:28:05,199
Speaker 3: to come home, even after I told him I was

652
00:28:05,240 --> 00:28:07,920
Speaker 3: going to the psych ward. You're done, Like, what the heck?

653
00:28:08,080 --> 00:28:10,280
Speaker 3: I'm sorry. You just found out your partner, your wife

654
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:12,120
Speaker 3: was in the psych ward and you didn't come home.

655
00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:15,240
Speaker 3: That's messed up. That's a big deal, man, huge deal.

656
00:28:15,400 --> 00:28:19,040
Speaker 3: Anyone in my family knows. My sister understands the situation.

657
00:28:19,320 --> 00:28:22,000
Speaker 3: My mom used to record all their conversations because my

658
00:28:22,080 --> 00:28:25,080
Speaker 3: sister would manipulate what was said. For a long time,

659
00:28:25,320 --> 00:28:27,480
Speaker 3: my mom would lock herself in the room before my

660
00:28:27,520 --> 00:28:30,200
Speaker 3: sister got home so she didn't have to endure her raft.

661
00:28:30,440 --> 00:28:32,480
Speaker 3: Needless to say, my sister will never be in my

662
00:28:32,560 --> 00:28:35,119
Speaker 3: life again. With my husband, he says things like I

663
00:28:35,160 --> 00:28:37,960
Speaker 3: was trying to stay a relationship with your nephew. He

664
00:28:38,080 --> 00:28:41,320
Speaker 3: never admits he did anything wrong in his eyes. People

665
00:28:41,360 --> 00:28:43,360
Speaker 3: tell me you never go against your husband or wife

666
00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:45,200
Speaker 3: when they make a decision, or if you question it,

667
00:28:45,240 --> 00:28:47,360
Speaker 3: you have a conversation in private. The fact that he

668
00:28:47,480 --> 00:28:50,400
Speaker 3: just believed my sister, who he had met once before,

669
00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:53,000
Speaker 3: without getting my set of the story is another hard spot.

670
00:28:53,200 --> 00:28:55,440
Speaker 3: I feel like he totally betrayed me in that moment.

671
00:28:55,600 --> 00:28:57,440
Speaker 3: The way it took him twenty four hours to come

672
00:28:57,440 --> 00:28:59,560
Speaker 3: home after I went to the psych ward also makes

673
00:28:59,600 --> 00:29:02,280
Speaker 3: me question if he cares. He keeps saying he thought

674
00:29:02,320 --> 00:29:04,280
Speaker 3: I'd come back, or that we had taken the time

675
00:29:04,360 --> 00:29:06,560
Speaker 3: off and paid for the cabin. I just don't know

676
00:29:06,600 --> 00:29:08,680
Speaker 3: if I am in the wrong for wanting a divorce

677
00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:13,239
Speaker 3: over this entire situation. No, your husband betrayed you. He

678
00:29:13,280 --> 00:29:15,360
Speaker 3: didn't care that you were in the psych word, he

679
00:29:15,480 --> 00:29:18,560
Speaker 3: yelled at you. Just overall, I'm like, this can't be

680
00:29:18,640 --> 00:29:20,800
Speaker 3: the first or last time that this is gonna happen.

681
00:29:21,200 --> 00:29:21,440
Speaker 4: Yeah.

682
00:29:21,480 --> 00:29:24,360
Speaker 5: Absolutely, These aren't things that are kind of like, Oh,

683
00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:27,400
Speaker 5: you have to understand the whole situation. It's like, no,

684
00:29:28,160 --> 00:29:31,840
Speaker 5: you should never been yelling at your partner. If your

685
00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:34,400
Speaker 5: partner is in this psych word, that should be a

686
00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:35,720
Speaker 5: big deal and you should be there for them.

687
00:29:35,840 --> 00:29:39,680
Speaker 3: So come on, come on, comments, come in one. Why

688
00:29:39,720 --> 00:29:42,200
Speaker 3: did you take others on your honeymoon? This has to

689
00:29:42,240 --> 00:29:44,760
Speaker 3: be fake. If it's not, why are you in contact

690
00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:46,600
Speaker 3: with any of these people? I forgot that there was

691
00:29:46,640 --> 00:29:49,120
Speaker 3: a honeymoon. Oh, p says, I wish it was fake.

692
00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:51,720
Speaker 3: We rent the cabin every summer and it's definitely better

693
00:29:51,720 --> 00:29:54,400
Speaker 3: with more people. His sister and her friend are great

694
00:29:54,440 --> 00:29:56,479
Speaker 3: to have there. It was a cheap place to go

695
00:29:56,520 --> 00:29:59,320
Speaker 3: after an expensive wedding. I no longer talk to my sister,

696
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:02,320
Speaker 3: So wouldn't Sam close with his sister or her friend.

697
00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:04,840
Speaker 3: I only see them every summer at the cabin. As

698
00:30:04,880 --> 00:30:06,880
Speaker 3: for my husband, well, we are married and I have

699
00:30:06,960 --> 00:30:10,400
Speaker 3: been contemplating divorce and working through it since comment two.

700
00:30:10,520 --> 00:30:14,560
Speaker 3: This situation doesn't seem divorce worthy. It needs couple's therapy.

701
00:30:14,960 --> 00:30:17,680
Speaker 3: How did you get married and didn't discuss family issues?

702
00:30:18,000 --> 00:30:19,960
Speaker 3: You should have talked about the relationship between you and

703
00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:23,040
Speaker 3: your sister, so he understood from the beginning as well.

704
00:30:23,120 --> 00:30:26,120
Speaker 3: You should never have invited her. You knew your relationship

705
00:30:26,160 --> 00:30:28,520
Speaker 3: with her and the bs she pulls. You brought this

706
00:30:28,600 --> 00:30:32,000
Speaker 3: on yourself. If a discussion was had about how crappy

707
00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:33,760
Speaker 3: of a person she is while you were still dating

708
00:30:33,800 --> 00:30:36,200
Speaker 3: or engaged, then he would have a clue. This is

709
00:30:36,240 --> 00:30:39,800
Speaker 3: not on your husband, This is completely on you. Wow. Okay,

710
00:30:39,960 --> 00:30:41,840
Speaker 3: I don't know if I agree with that. I feel

711
00:30:41,840 --> 00:30:43,840
Speaker 3: like that's a little bit unfair. Kind of makes the

712
00:30:43,880 --> 00:30:46,920
Speaker 3: situation like, oh, we're black and white. It's like, maybe

713
00:30:46,960 --> 00:30:48,560
Speaker 3: she should have told him, but also he shouldn't have

714
00:30:48,680 --> 00:30:50,600
Speaker 3: yelled at her and also not been around her for

715
00:30:50,640 --> 00:30:55,680
Speaker 3: twenty four hours exactly, Opie. Things with my sisters are complicated.

716
00:30:55,880 --> 00:30:57,960
Speaker 3: She got sober and everyone was telling me how much

717
00:30:57,960 --> 00:31:00,800
Speaker 3: she had changed her and my relationship seemed a lot better,

718
00:31:01,320 --> 00:31:04,240
Speaker 3: although only seeing her in person every two years. I

719
00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:06,200
Speaker 3: have tried to move on with my life and don't

720
00:31:06,280 --> 00:31:08,280
Speaker 3: like bringing up the past. I don't even live close

721
00:31:08,320 --> 00:31:10,240
Speaker 3: to my family anymore, so I just took the words

722
00:31:10,240 --> 00:31:13,000
Speaker 3: of everyone else. He's aware of everything that happened with

723
00:31:13,000 --> 00:31:16,280
Speaker 3: my uncle, and brother. I'm not sure past that's why

724
00:31:16,320 --> 00:31:18,800
Speaker 3: he decided to side with her, other than him saying

725
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:21,080
Speaker 3: he was trying to save our relationship with my nephew.

726
00:31:21,200 --> 00:31:24,800
Speaker 3: And there is an update to finish this story off. Wow,

727
00:31:25,080 --> 00:31:28,040
Speaker 3: an update. I agree. I think that is not necessarily

728
00:31:28,040 --> 00:31:30,640
Speaker 3: divorce worthy, but I do think couple's counseling is a

729
00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:34,080
Speaker 3: need because it's totally inappropriate behavior from him.

730
00:31:34,160 --> 00:31:37,239
Speaker 5: Right, and it kind of just shows like, well, in

731
00:31:37,360 --> 00:31:40,200
Speaker 5: future conflicts and stuff like, is this going to just

732
00:31:40,240 --> 00:31:43,080
Speaker 5: continue to happen if we don't confront this problem?

733
00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:43,320
Speaker 1: You know?

734
00:31:43,720 --> 00:31:45,720
Speaker 3: Yeah? Is this how you're going to treat me every

735
00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:46,760
Speaker 3: time we have an argument?

736
00:31:46,880 --> 00:31:48,800
Speaker 5: I think that, like how you deal with conflict is

737
00:31:48,880 --> 00:31:51,920
Speaker 5: like the most important thing in a relation, you know, agreed,

738
00:31:52,440 --> 00:31:53,640
Speaker 5: So they gotta figure that out.

739
00:31:53,760 --> 00:31:56,920
Speaker 3: There is an update. Yes, we brought people on our honeymoon.

740
00:31:57,040 --> 00:31:59,440
Speaker 3: His sister and her friend come with us every summer

741
00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:01,720
Speaker 3: to that cabin, and it gets boring quickly to be

742
00:32:01,760 --> 00:32:03,680
Speaker 3: in the middle of nowhere with no internet or TV.

743
00:32:03,920 --> 00:32:07,360
Speaker 3: Having more people means more games and more socialization. It

744
00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:10,320
Speaker 3: was a cheap honeymoon after an expensive wedding, as renting

745
00:32:10,360 --> 00:32:12,480
Speaker 3: the cabin on a private lake is only four hundred

746
00:32:12,520 --> 00:32:14,480
Speaker 3: dollars for the week. But you know what is no

747
00:32:14,600 --> 00:32:17,560
Speaker 3: money for the week listening to full episodes of stories

748
00:32:17,680 --> 00:32:21,080
Speaker 3: just like this. Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or

749
00:32:21,120 --> 00:32:23,320
Speaker 3: your favorite podcast app and search a poky story time.

750
00:32:23,440 --> 00:32:26,400
Speaker 3: But there's a little teeny We've been left of the story,

751
00:32:26,600 --> 00:32:29,520
Speaker 3: so let's finish it off. Yes, I'm off fertility meds.

752
00:32:29,560 --> 00:32:31,640
Speaker 3: I'm not sure why everyone is assuming I'm still on

753
00:32:31,680 --> 00:32:34,479
Speaker 3: them while considering a divorce. It was just background as

754
00:32:34,520 --> 00:32:37,360
Speaker 3: to why I reacted as extremely as I did. I

755
00:32:37,400 --> 00:32:39,760
Speaker 3: know my reaction was a little extreme, and if I

756
00:32:39,840 --> 00:32:41,720
Speaker 3: wasn't on the meds, or if my dream car had

757
00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:44,480
Speaker 3: him in total two weeks prior, or if everything else

758
00:32:44,520 --> 00:32:46,840
Speaker 3: hadn't taken place in such a short period, I know

759
00:32:46,920 --> 00:32:49,160
Speaker 3: I wouldn't have ended up in the psych word. And

760
00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:52,000
Speaker 3: that is the end of the story.

761
00:32:53,120 --> 00:32:58,120
Speaker 5: Wow, I'm so sorry, Op, our lovely follower and member

762
00:32:58,160 --> 00:32:59,080
Speaker 5: of our community.

763
00:32:59,440 --> 00:33:02,080
Speaker 3: That's very hard. No, I mean, your husband is not

764
00:33:02,280 --> 00:33:05,800
Speaker 3: being kind or understanding, and I think you gotta have

765
00:33:05,800 --> 00:33:07,720
Speaker 3: a conversation with him and be like, hey, why did

766
00:33:07,720 --> 00:33:10,360
Speaker 3: you react that way? Because that was a really intense reaction,

767
00:33:10,480 --> 00:33:12,480
Speaker 3: especially when I was clearly going through.

768
00:33:12,280 --> 00:33:14,240
Speaker 5: A lot, right, Like, there's gotta be some sort of

769
00:33:14,280 --> 00:33:18,080
Speaker 5: deeper meaning to it. You know, it's always best to

770
00:33:18,200 --> 00:33:21,239
Speaker 5: jump to counseling rather than jumping to divorce, even if

771
00:33:21,240 --> 00:33:23,760
Speaker 5: it ends in divorce. I mean, just counsel just to

772
00:33:23,760 --> 00:33:26,800
Speaker 5: see what's going on, to know that you tried. But wow,

773
00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:29,200
Speaker 5: thank you for setting in your story. And to all

774
00:33:29,200 --> 00:33:30,280
Speaker 5: you lovely people.

775
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:32,200
Speaker 3: In the comments. Go ahead and send in your stories.

776
00:33:32,680 --> 00:33:34,040
Speaker 3: You'll read them right in front of you.

777
00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:36,800
Speaker 2: Hey, it's Sam. We're gonna get back to the stories.

778
00:33:36,840 --> 00:33:39,880
Speaker 2: But here's three minutes of bads from our sponsors. My

779
00:33:40,040 --> 00:33:42,680
Speaker 2: mother in law tempted to change my baby's middle name

780
00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:47,560
Speaker 2: to her name. What are we doing, James, Dad, It's

781
00:33:47,600 --> 00:33:48,680
Speaker 2: too much, That's what it is.

782
00:33:48,760 --> 00:33:48,960
Speaker 8: Hey.

783
00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:51,760
Speaker 2: I'm twenty six female and I just gave birth to

784
00:33:51,800 --> 00:33:54,640
Speaker 2: my first child. I had a daughter whose name is

785
00:33:55,080 --> 00:33:59,080
Speaker 2: Story in October twenty twenty two. I fell in love

786
00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:01,240
Speaker 2: with my college sweet heart, twenty seven Mail, and we

787
00:34:01,320 --> 00:34:04,520
Speaker 2: married over two years ago. We started trying for the

788
00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:08,640
Speaker 2: baby in January twenty twenty two and quickly got pregnant.

789
00:34:08,719 --> 00:34:12,440
Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from Lovely and Tonia exo.

790
00:34:12,520 --> 00:34:14,000
Speaker 2: And if you want to submit your own stories, Good

791
00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:17,120
Speaker 2: Our Slash, Okay, story Time, our little subreddit, and some

792
00:34:17,160 --> 00:34:19,160
Speaker 2: of them there. So I've always had a great relationship

793
00:34:19,200 --> 00:34:21,600
Speaker 2: with my husband's side of the family. My parents passed

794
00:34:21,600 --> 00:34:23,880
Speaker 2: away when I was fifteen from a car wreck, so

795
00:34:23,920 --> 00:34:26,720
Speaker 2: my grandparents raised me. My mother in law and I

796
00:34:26,760 --> 00:34:29,759
Speaker 2: always had the best relationship. She was there for me

797
00:34:30,000 --> 00:34:32,879
Speaker 2: through my entire pregnancy. It was going to be her

798
00:34:32,960 --> 00:34:35,520
Speaker 2: first and only grandkid because my brother in law and

799
00:34:35,600 --> 00:34:37,759
Speaker 2: sister in law want don't want any kids, and me

800
00:34:37,800 --> 00:34:39,840
Speaker 2: and my husband only want one kid. So there's a

801
00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:42,040
Speaker 2: lot riding on this little little child.

802
00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:42,319
Speaker 1: A lot.

803
00:34:42,440 --> 00:34:44,400
Speaker 2: There's a lot of state, a lot at stake, and

804
00:34:44,440 --> 00:34:46,759
Speaker 2: only one chance for you to claim the name is

805
00:34:46,800 --> 00:34:49,920
Speaker 2: your own mother in law. Ever since I was a

806
00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:52,960
Speaker 2: little babe, I've said if I had a daughter, she

807
00:34:53,040 --> 00:34:55,960
Speaker 2: would have my mom's middle name, and if I had

808
00:34:55,960 --> 00:34:59,040
Speaker 2: a son, he would have my dad's middle name. Surprisingly,

809
00:34:59,239 --> 00:35:01,520
Speaker 2: we were having a and my mother in law was

810
00:35:01,719 --> 00:35:04,680
Speaker 2: so excited she even helped me pick out my daughter's

811
00:35:04,760 --> 00:35:08,480
Speaker 2: name story Noel James. Noel is my mom's name. She

812
00:35:08,600 --> 00:35:11,360
Speaker 2: was so happy and excited about her name, or so

813
00:35:11,440 --> 00:35:14,000
Speaker 2: I thought. Fast forward. Two months later, I go into

814
00:35:14,120 --> 00:35:18,120
Speaker 2: labor at work. Well, my coworker drove me to the hospital.

815
00:35:18,200 --> 00:35:20,200
Speaker 2: My husband and mother in law met me there. I

816
00:35:20,360 --> 00:35:22,600
Speaker 2: wanted her to be in the room because she was

817
00:35:22,600 --> 00:35:25,319
Speaker 2: my second support person. Again, mother in law has been there.

818
00:35:25,600 --> 00:35:29,240
Speaker 2: Everything was going so well until it didn't.

819
00:35:29,640 --> 00:35:31,960
Speaker 1: Ah, isn't that how the story goes?

820
00:35:32,280 --> 00:35:36,280
Speaker 2: It is? It is. Everything was swimming until we were drowning.

821
00:35:36,480 --> 00:35:39,440
Speaker 2: I really ruined a whole name that was very common. Unfortunately,

822
00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:41,799
Speaker 2: I wasn't dilating at all, so I had to have

823
00:35:41,880 --> 00:35:44,839
Speaker 2: an emergency c section. It went great. Twenty minutes later

824
00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:51,040
Speaker 2: we had a beautiful and healthy daughter. Bravo, bravo, congratulations.

825
00:35:51,239 --> 00:35:53,160
Speaker 2: But again, we know this is going to go wrong.

826
00:35:53,280 --> 00:35:55,799
Speaker 2: I was really drained and not feeling well afterwards, so

827
00:35:55,800 --> 00:35:58,320
Speaker 2: I decided to rest while my husband went to grab

828
00:35:58,400 --> 00:36:00,879
Speaker 2: some things because I went into the la at work.

829
00:36:01,000 --> 00:36:02,640
Speaker 2: My mother in law agreed to stay with me and

830
00:36:02,640 --> 00:36:05,120
Speaker 2: look after the baby while I took a nap. Shortly afterward,

831
00:36:05,280 --> 00:36:07,040
Speaker 2: I was awoken by one of the nurses on the

832
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:09,200
Speaker 2: team and she said, sorry to wake you, but I

833
00:36:09,280 --> 00:36:13,120
Speaker 2: heard you expressed concerns about changing your daughter's middle name.

834
00:36:13,280 --> 00:36:16,759
Speaker 2: I was completely shocked, dumbfound and said ma'am, what the

835
00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:19,880
Speaker 2: heck are you talking about? Before she can say anything,

836
00:36:20,080 --> 00:36:22,719
Speaker 2: my mother in law jumped in quickly and said, well,

837
00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:25,120
Speaker 2: I just thought, since I've been the one that's been

838
00:36:25,200 --> 00:36:27,960
Speaker 2: here in supporting you, that she should have my middle name.

839
00:36:28,080 --> 00:36:29,880
Speaker 2: Middle name is Marie.

840
00:36:30,080 --> 00:36:32,000
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I called it.

841
00:36:32,080 --> 00:36:35,240
Speaker 2: You called it. I called it Kean before the stream

842
00:36:35,280 --> 00:36:38,040
Speaker 2: started was like, there's what are the three white girl names?

843
00:36:38,719 --> 00:36:40,640
Speaker 1: Marie, Anne, and Rose?

844
00:36:41,160 --> 00:36:45,920
Speaker 2: Those are the three? Well I was confused and so

845
00:36:46,080 --> 00:36:48,719
Speaker 2: shocked and literally couldn't get any words out. So I

846
00:36:48,760 --> 00:36:51,840
Speaker 2: simply said what This lady looked me directly in my

847
00:36:51,960 --> 00:36:55,040
Speaker 2: eyes and said, well, she's not even here to support you,

848
00:36:55,120 --> 00:36:58,600
Speaker 2: so what sense does that make? I immediately started to

849
00:36:58,680 --> 00:37:01,360
Speaker 2: shed tears because that that really hurt me to my

850
00:37:01,480 --> 00:37:04,160
Speaker 2: core to hear this. My mom was the best mom

851
00:37:04,200 --> 00:37:07,960
Speaker 2: anybody could ask for. I miss her dearly every single day.

852
00:37:08,040 --> 00:37:10,160
Speaker 2: She would have been the best grandmother to my daughter.

853
00:37:10,239 --> 00:37:12,359
Speaker 2: I dried my tears and looked up at her and

854
00:37:12,400 --> 00:37:14,960
Speaker 2: told her to get out and don't come back. I

855
00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:17,200
Speaker 2: can't believe that you would say that, knowing my mother

856
00:37:17,400 --> 00:37:18,080
Speaker 2: is passed away.

857
00:37:18,239 --> 00:37:21,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a pretty egregious thing to say. Yeah, undos

858
00:37:21,880 --> 00:37:23,680
Speaker 1: a lot, a lot of good. Of the good that

859
00:37:23,719 --> 00:37:25,320
Speaker 1: you've done, you might just be.

860
00:37:25,360 --> 00:37:27,680
Speaker 2: Like back to baseline or potentially negative.

861
00:37:27,760 --> 00:37:28,720
Speaker 1: I would say negative.

862
00:37:28,840 --> 00:37:31,080
Speaker 2: Yeah. She eventually left the mother in law and I

863
00:37:31,080 --> 00:37:34,879
Speaker 2: immediately called my husband, crying and telling him what she did.

864
00:37:34,960 --> 00:37:37,040
Speaker 2: He was so shocked and didn't believe me at first,

865
00:37:37,080 --> 00:37:38,840
Speaker 2: because his mother is not the type of person. I

866
00:37:38,840 --> 00:37:41,040
Speaker 2: thought so too. He came back to the hospital where

867
00:37:41,080 --> 00:37:43,600
Speaker 2: the nurses confirmed the story. He apologized to me and

868
00:37:43,640 --> 00:37:45,879
Speaker 2: gave me a hug and stated that must have been

869
00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:48,480
Speaker 2: hard to hear. It was while we were discharged two

870
00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:51,480
Speaker 2: days later, and that's when I started receiving texts from

871
00:37:51,520 --> 00:37:54,160
Speaker 2: my brother in law and sister in law stating how

872
00:37:54,239 --> 00:37:57,680
Speaker 2: I'm wrong for punting her out the hospital room when

873
00:37:57,760 --> 00:37:59,600
Speaker 2: all she was trying to do was make me more

874
00:37:59,600 --> 00:38:03,120
Speaker 2: comfortab by disgracing my passed away mom's name.

875
00:38:03,280 --> 00:38:05,600
Speaker 1: Dude, come on, that's such a you might as well

876
00:38:05,640 --> 00:38:07,800
Speaker 1: be mister fantastic. That's such a stretch.

877
00:38:08,400 --> 00:38:11,799
Speaker 2: Come on, many, Yeah, that was good. That was good.

878
00:38:11,960 --> 00:38:14,200
Speaker 2: My sister in law even went as far as to

879
00:38:14,280 --> 00:38:18,440
Speaker 2: tell me, if you ever call my mother a bee again,

880
00:38:18,719 --> 00:38:21,759
Speaker 2: you won't be alive to raise your daughter. It was

881
00:38:21,880 --> 00:38:24,279
Speaker 2: clear that my mother in law fabricated the story. I

882
00:38:24,360 --> 00:38:27,160
Speaker 2: was shocked. That's when my husband grabbed the phone and

883
00:38:27,239 --> 00:38:31,160
Speaker 2: cursed his brother and sister out really badly, especially a sister,

884
00:38:31,400 --> 00:38:34,200
Speaker 2: and he told them what really happened. They immediately apologized

885
00:38:34,239 --> 00:38:36,440
Speaker 2: to me. My sister in law even started crying for

886
00:38:36,480 --> 00:38:39,080
Speaker 2: what she said one minute before. I was really mad,

887
00:38:39,239 --> 00:38:42,120
Speaker 2: but I forgave her because I would be the same

888
00:38:42,160 --> 00:38:45,880
Speaker 2: way about my mom and grandmother. Three days later, my

889
00:38:45,920 --> 00:38:47,520
Speaker 2: brother in law and sister in law came to meet

890
00:38:47,520 --> 00:38:49,680
Speaker 2: their niece. It was lovely and beautiful sight to see,

891
00:38:49,719 --> 00:38:54,200
Speaker 2: and thirty minutes later, my mother in law pulls up unannounced.

892
00:38:54,280 --> 00:38:57,080
Speaker 2: I quickly grabbed my baby and went upstairs. My husband

893
00:38:57,120 --> 00:38:59,720
Speaker 2: opened the door and told her she's not allowed around

894
00:38:59,719 --> 00:39:03,040
Speaker 2: our baby until my wife is comfortable. She quickly caused

895
00:39:03,040 --> 00:39:04,759
Speaker 2: a scene at the front door. Eventually, my brother in

896
00:39:04,800 --> 00:39:06,600
Speaker 2: law and sister law got her to calm down and

897
00:39:06,640 --> 00:39:09,000
Speaker 2: she left my brother in lawn. Sister law came back in,

898
00:39:09,120 --> 00:39:11,880
Speaker 2: apologized to us and left. Ever since then, the rude

899
00:39:11,960 --> 00:39:15,040
Speaker 2: text messages and phone calls didn't stop. There were even

900
00:39:15,080 --> 00:39:17,279
Speaker 2: texts about my mom again, the mom that passed away. Well.

901
00:39:17,320 --> 00:39:20,279
Speaker 2: Ever since then, the rude texts have been NonStop, so

902
00:39:20,320 --> 00:39:23,880
Speaker 2: that's when I cut off all contact with her. I

903
00:39:23,920 --> 00:39:24,839
Speaker 2: want to stop right here.

904
00:39:24,880 --> 00:39:26,520
Speaker 3: You're not my mom?

905
00:39:26,640 --> 00:39:28,160
Speaker 2: Are we at a no contact zone?

906
00:39:28,280 --> 00:39:32,719
Speaker 1: Yes? Do we like give a warning? Or is that

907
00:39:32,760 --> 00:39:33,000
Speaker 1: I mean?

908
00:39:33,239 --> 00:39:35,279
Speaker 2: I mean we the uh right?

909
00:39:35,320 --> 00:39:36,719
Speaker 1: Sorry, it's not even it's not even a warning.

910
00:39:36,760 --> 00:39:39,600
Speaker 5: I was a threat, like if you keep going, yeah,

911
00:39:39,640 --> 00:39:41,040
Speaker 5: you are not seeing this baby anything.

912
00:39:41,080 --> 00:39:43,840
Speaker 2: I told my husband that's his mom and I would

913
00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:46,760
Speaker 2: never tell him not to talk to her. But I'm done,

914
00:39:46,840 --> 00:39:48,680
Speaker 2: he said, I love you, I love our daughter, and

915
00:39:48,719 --> 00:39:51,480
Speaker 2: this is his family now and he will do whatever

916
00:39:51,520 --> 00:39:53,720
Speaker 2: it takes to protect it. My grandmother and friends told

917
00:39:53,719 --> 00:39:55,640
Speaker 2: me that I wasn't wrong and they are proud of

918
00:39:55,640 --> 00:39:58,760
Speaker 2: me for standing my ground. And surprisingly, my best friend

919
00:39:58,800 --> 00:40:01,719
Speaker 2: told me that I'm wrong about how I'm going about it,

920
00:40:01,800 --> 00:40:05,440
Speaker 2: especially since that will be her only grandchild, which I

921
00:40:05,480 --> 00:40:08,480
Speaker 2: cannot stop thinking about. So am I the a hole?

922
00:40:08,600 --> 00:40:10,799
Speaker 2: There is an update, Toka? What do you think? I think?

923
00:40:11,080 --> 00:40:14,200
Speaker 1: No, as of right now, it's fully justified. Like if

924
00:40:14,200 --> 00:40:16,200
Speaker 1: it was like a permanent like I'll never speak to

925
00:40:16,239 --> 00:40:17,680
Speaker 1: again for as long as I live and you'll never

926
00:40:17,680 --> 00:40:19,840
Speaker 1: see my child, I'd be like, oh, okay, well maybe

927
00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:23,200
Speaker 1: that might be a little a little far over words. Yeah,

928
00:40:23,239 --> 00:40:27,200
Speaker 1: like if she slayed your mother, like that's that's one thing.

929
00:40:27,360 --> 00:40:29,719
Speaker 1: Definitely never see her or speak to her again. But

930
00:40:29,880 --> 00:40:32,160
Speaker 1: like you're however long this woman is going to be

931
00:40:32,280 --> 00:40:34,759
Speaker 1: in your life in some capacity because she is your

932
00:40:34,840 --> 00:40:37,359
Speaker 1: husband's mother, but she has to apologize.

933
00:40:37,400 --> 00:40:39,400
Speaker 2: Hey, guys, this is not really an am I the

934
00:40:39,440 --> 00:40:41,319
Speaker 2: A hole post? But this is more of an I

935
00:40:41,360 --> 00:40:43,640
Speaker 2: need an advice post because I actually listened to do some

936
00:40:43,680 --> 00:40:45,600
Speaker 2: of your previous comments on my two posts. As many

937
00:40:45,640 --> 00:40:48,279
Speaker 2: of you know this whole ordeal, my husband was and

938
00:40:48,400 --> 00:40:51,280
Speaker 2: is completely stuck by my side through everything that happened

939
00:40:51,320 --> 00:40:53,560
Speaker 2: with his mom trying to change my daughter's middle name

940
00:40:53,640 --> 00:40:56,400
Speaker 2: two hours after I had a C section After my

941
00:40:56,520 --> 00:41:00,080
Speaker 2: last post, his mom did continue to deny everything. I

942
00:41:00,080 --> 00:41:03,600
Speaker 2: apologize to my husband, but as yet to apologize to me. Well,

943
00:41:03,600 --> 00:41:05,160
Speaker 2: she sent my sister in allowed to tell me that

944
00:41:05,200 --> 00:41:08,719
Speaker 2: she apologized, But that's not an actual apology in my book,

945
00:41:08,760 --> 00:41:10,680
Speaker 2: unless it's face to face and you really mean it.

946
00:41:10,760 --> 00:41:12,520
Speaker 2: That's not the advice I was looking for. I'm looking

947
00:41:12,520 --> 00:41:15,279
Speaker 2: for advice regarding my husband. I can physically see that

948
00:41:15,320 --> 00:41:17,719
Speaker 2: this whole thing has taken a toll my husband more

949
00:41:17,800 --> 00:41:19,360
Speaker 2: so on the fact that he and his mother and

950
00:41:19,400 --> 00:41:22,080
Speaker 2: siblings are fairly close and have always been. I love

951
00:41:22,160 --> 00:41:24,279
Speaker 2: him for protecting our family and standing by her side,

952
00:41:24,280 --> 00:41:25,919
Speaker 2: but I also don't want to be in the way

953
00:41:25,960 --> 00:41:28,720
Speaker 2: of him having a relationship with his mom. I overheard

954
00:41:28,719 --> 00:41:30,960
Speaker 2: a conversation with him saying that he really misses her,

955
00:41:31,040 --> 00:41:33,080
Speaker 2: but he knows what he's doing is the right thing,

956
00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:34,400
Speaker 2: and I don't want to stand in the way of that.

957
00:41:34,440 --> 00:41:36,600
Speaker 2: I would never tell my husband to choose between our

958
00:41:36,719 --> 00:41:38,959
Speaker 2: family or his mom. I feel like he's only trying

959
00:41:38,960 --> 00:41:41,080
Speaker 2: to make me happy and not get me upset, but

960
00:41:41,120 --> 00:41:43,479
Speaker 2: not thinking about his feelings as well. I'm not going

961
00:41:43,520 --> 00:41:45,279
Speaker 2: to lie and say I don't miss my mother in

962
00:41:45,360 --> 00:41:47,640
Speaker 2: law because we were really close, and I still hope

963
00:41:47,680 --> 00:41:50,399
Speaker 2: that her acting nice towards me up until I had

964
00:41:50,480 --> 00:41:53,160
Speaker 2: our daughter wasn't just an act. But I can't sit

965
00:41:53,200 --> 00:41:55,280
Speaker 2: here and excuse the fact that she did that because

966
00:41:55,280 --> 00:41:57,399
Speaker 2: it really hurt me to my core. But it hurt

967
00:41:57,440 --> 00:42:00,160
Speaker 2: worse seeing my husband like this. I thought about just

968
00:42:00,200 --> 00:42:02,440
Speaker 2: letting my husband take our daughter over to his mom's

969
00:42:02,440 --> 00:42:04,759
Speaker 2: house so she can fully meet her outside of the

970
00:42:04,840 --> 00:42:06,759
Speaker 2: day I had her, But I can't help but think

971
00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:09,360
Speaker 2: how many other things will she try and undermine with

972
00:42:09,400 --> 00:42:11,520
Speaker 2: my daughter? Exactly? Like you know, this is not a

973
00:42:11,560 --> 00:42:13,839
Speaker 2: person that you want around your daughter if if she's

974
00:42:13,840 --> 00:42:15,600
Speaker 2: gonna be a bad influence. I know that my husband

975
00:42:15,680 --> 00:42:17,760
Speaker 2: is hurting just as well as me. I can physically

976
00:42:17,800 --> 00:42:19,719
Speaker 2: see it. He just won't admit it because he wants

977
00:42:19,760 --> 00:42:22,480
Speaker 2: to make me happy, which he does. He's literally the best.

978
00:42:22,560 --> 00:42:24,680
Speaker 2: I don't want to stand in the way with the relationship.

979
00:42:24,680 --> 00:42:26,440
Speaker 2: I wish I just knew how to proceed with this

980
00:42:26,560 --> 00:42:28,560
Speaker 2: if you guys were in my situation, what we'd do.

981
00:42:28,680 --> 00:42:30,960
Speaker 2: By the way, you should always listen to full episodes

982
00:42:31,000 --> 00:42:33,640
Speaker 2: with stories just like this. Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts,

983
00:42:33,719 --> 00:42:36,680
Speaker 2: or your favorite podcast app and search. Okay, storytime, there's

984
00:42:36,719 --> 00:42:40,239
Speaker 2: another relevant updates, But let's quickly discuss in terms of

985
00:42:40,280 --> 00:42:43,120
Speaker 2: like what OP should do. I think I don't think

986
00:42:43,160 --> 00:42:45,040
Speaker 2: she's earned the right to be around you or your daughter,

987
00:42:45,160 --> 00:42:48,280
Speaker 2: But I actually think having your husband talk and spend

988
00:42:48,320 --> 00:42:50,960
Speaker 2: time with your mother in law may produce the change

989
00:42:50,960 --> 00:42:52,320
Speaker 2: that you want over time.

990
00:42:52,560 --> 00:42:57,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, it just has to wear away, Yeah, a road

991
00:42:57,320 --> 00:43:00,400
Speaker 1: the layer of defensiveness.

992
00:42:59,520 --> 00:43:02,000
Speaker 2: That she has and try to understand why she's acting

993
00:43:02,080 --> 00:43:04,480
Speaker 2: like this, like there's a reason. It might be a

994
00:43:04,480 --> 00:43:09,680
Speaker 2: bad reason. Brain scan, Yeah, what's going under? Reading some

995
00:43:09,760 --> 00:43:12,640
Speaker 2: of your guys's comments had me sitting back realizing who

996
00:43:12,680 --> 00:43:14,760
Speaker 2: the heck I am because this is not my fault.

997
00:43:14,960 --> 00:43:17,480
Speaker 2: I didn't cause none of this. So thank you guys

998
00:43:17,520 --> 00:43:19,640
Speaker 2: for the nice comments and some harsh ones, because I

999
00:43:19,680 --> 00:43:21,960
Speaker 2: need to hear it. I'm done putting everyone else's feeling

1000
00:43:22,120 --> 00:43:24,880
Speaker 2: before mine. My daughter will not be around her until

1001
00:43:24,920 --> 00:43:26,960
Speaker 2: she seeks help. If she chooses not to get help,

1002
00:43:27,000 --> 00:43:28,920
Speaker 2: then it's her loss, because my daughter is amazing. I

1003
00:43:28,960 --> 00:43:31,360
Speaker 2: don't have many friends but someone I feel more close to.

1004
00:43:31,680 --> 00:43:33,400
Speaker 2: But somehow I feel more close to some of you

1005
00:43:33,440 --> 00:43:36,080
Speaker 2: guys than my old best friend. Also, for the person

1006
00:43:36,120 --> 00:43:38,319
Speaker 2: that got the top comment on my last post, thank you,

1007
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:39,839
Speaker 2: And I mean this from the bottom of my heart.

1008
00:43:39,840 --> 00:43:42,080
Speaker 2: Thank you because I really needed to hear that. Love

1009
00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:44,200
Speaker 2: you guys. So it sounds like, op, he's in a

1010
00:43:44,239 --> 00:43:47,359
Speaker 2: better spot. It sucks, but make sure you put your

1011
00:43:47,400 --> 00:43:49,799
Speaker 2: happiness and that of your child before everyone else. I

1012
00:43:49,800 --> 00:43:52,480
Speaker 2: think let your husband have the relationship with his mother

1013
00:43:52,520 --> 00:43:54,960
Speaker 2: in law or his mother and like keep talking to her,

1014
00:43:55,000 --> 00:43:57,120
Speaker 2: because I think that's the only way that she might

1015
00:43:57,120 --> 00:43:58,800
Speaker 2: come around, but keep her far away from you and

1016
00:43:58,840 --> 00:43:59,759
Speaker 2: your daughter for the time being.

1017
00:44:00,160 --> 00:44:04,319
Speaker 1: Gonna have to chip away. It's gonna be probably. I

1018
00:44:04,320 --> 00:44:07,160
Speaker 1: can't imagine her just having an epiphany and being like, oh, yeah,

1019
00:44:07,239 --> 00:44:09,520
Speaker 1: I was wrong and I need to address all of this.

1020
00:44:09,719 --> 00:44:10,600
Speaker 1: It's like it's gonna have.

1021
00:44:10,600 --> 00:44:13,080
Speaker 2: To wear damn wear down.

1022
00:44:13,280 --> 00:44:14,080
Speaker 1: No, you can get there.

1023
00:44:15,840 --> 00:44:19,080
Speaker 2: I can't get my sister in law to leave after Thanksgiving.

1024
00:44:19,160 --> 00:44:20,720
Speaker 2: I had to involve my parents.

1025
00:44:21,120 --> 00:44:23,960
Speaker 1: Wow, well, at least you didn't have to involve the police.

1026
00:44:24,280 --> 00:44:26,799
Speaker 2: I mean parents' bounce. There's almost as good so throw

1027
00:44:26,800 --> 00:44:29,360
Speaker 2: away account. This is long one. I apologize the situation

1028
00:44:29,480 --> 00:44:31,759
Speaker 2: is just odd. I thirty mail, just bought my first

1029
00:44:31,760 --> 00:44:35,080
Speaker 2: house and decided to host Thanksgiving for my big extended

1030
00:44:35,120 --> 00:44:38,000
Speaker 2: family about twenty people. Among those I invited were my

1031
00:44:38,080 --> 00:44:40,520
Speaker 2: brother and his wife Bull thirty five, and my nieces

1032
00:44:40,719 --> 00:44:43,120
Speaker 2: by three to two, all who were driving from out

1033
00:44:43,160 --> 00:44:45,360
Speaker 2: of state. By the way, this comes from Illustrious Phase

1034
00:44:45,400 --> 00:44:46,640
Speaker 2: one two to one. If you want to submit your

1035
00:44:46,680 --> 00:44:49,239
Speaker 2: own stories, go to our slash Okay storytime. Cell bred

1036
00:44:49,239 --> 00:44:51,560
Speaker 2: it so because my house isn't big enough for everyone

1037
00:44:51,600 --> 00:44:54,200
Speaker 2: to spend the night and eat. I also rented out

1038
00:44:54,200 --> 00:44:57,279
Speaker 2: an airbnb down the road for anyone traveling a long

1039
00:44:57,320 --> 00:44:59,960
Speaker 2: distance to stay overnight at That is super nice. Wow.

1040
00:45:00,160 --> 00:45:02,440
Speaker 2: It ended up being my parents, brother, and aunt and

1041
00:45:02,480 --> 00:45:04,960
Speaker 2: uncle staying there while my husband's siblings and parents stayed

1042
00:45:04,960 --> 00:45:07,640
Speaker 2: with us. On Thanksgiving morning, while we were all running

1043
00:45:07,680 --> 00:45:10,799
Speaker 2: around like crazy getting the food together, my brother at

1044
00:45:10,840 --> 00:45:13,959
Speaker 2: some point slipped out and drove all the way back home,

1045
00:45:14,160 --> 00:45:17,200
Speaker 2: leaving his wife and three kids with our family. What

1046
00:45:17,600 --> 00:45:19,799
Speaker 2: that's weird? What that's a.

1047
00:45:20,000 --> 00:45:21,920
Speaker 1: Weird they're getting divorced. Yeah.

1048
00:45:22,120 --> 00:45:25,120
Speaker 2: After calling and texting from several family members, he said

1049
00:45:25,320 --> 00:45:27,080
Speaker 2: he would be back the next day to pick up

1050
00:45:27,080 --> 00:45:29,520
Speaker 2: his wife and kids and to have them enjoy Thanksgiving

1051
00:45:29,560 --> 00:45:32,400
Speaker 2: with us. As he took their only car, His wife

1052
00:45:32,600 --> 00:45:35,080
Speaker 2: seemed very nonchalant about the whole ordeal. I offered to

1053
00:45:35,080 --> 00:45:37,279
Speaker 2: pay for an uber or lift home for her to

1054
00:45:37,280 --> 00:45:40,200
Speaker 2: figure out what happened and watch the girls, which she declined.

1055
00:45:40,320 --> 00:45:43,239
Speaker 2: We continued the day with the awkward air around it,

1056
00:45:43,280 --> 00:45:46,800
Speaker 2: but slowly started noticing that she was passing her children

1057
00:45:46,920 --> 00:45:49,520
Speaker 2: off on the other people throughout the day without asking.

1058
00:45:49,600 --> 00:45:51,239
Speaker 2: At first, it wasn't a big deal, as we were

1059
00:45:51,239 --> 00:45:53,880
Speaker 2: worried about her in this whole fiasco, but eventually it

1060
00:45:53,920 --> 00:45:56,520
Speaker 2: became annoying. She would appear in the kitchen with the baby,

1061
00:45:56,600 --> 00:45:58,719
Speaker 2: pop her into someone else's arms who was in the

1062
00:45:58,760 --> 00:46:01,120
Speaker 2: middle of cooking, then disappeared for an hour or so

1063
00:46:01,239 --> 00:46:03,640
Speaker 2: into living room to watch them TV. I don't mind

1064
00:46:03,920 --> 00:46:06,560
Speaker 2: helping when asked, but she never would ask, and it

1065
00:46:06,600 --> 00:46:09,120
Speaker 2: was always someone busy with cooking, So she's just like,

1066
00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:10,759
Speaker 2: here's my kid, take care of it, and I'm gonna

1067
00:46:10,760 --> 00:46:13,640
Speaker 2: go do something else. I'm gonna go play. No clash

1068
00:46:13,680 --> 00:46:17,160
Speaker 2: of clans or whatever. But jeweled, what's the what's the jeweled? One?

1069
00:46:17,280 --> 00:46:21,120
Speaker 2: The jeweled? Is it called the jeweled? But jewels? One

1070
00:46:21,120 --> 00:46:24,120
Speaker 2: of the jewels. When we finally sat to eat, she

1071
00:46:24,239 --> 00:46:26,440
Speaker 2: ended up sitting her girls at one end of the

1072
00:46:26,480 --> 00:46:29,880
Speaker 2: table and sitting on the opposite end, leaving her kids,

1073
00:46:29,880 --> 00:46:32,879
Speaker 2: one of which couldn't really feed herself, another needing lots

1074
00:46:32,880 --> 00:46:35,520
Speaker 2: of help defend for themselves. Of course, my parents jumped

1075
00:46:35,560 --> 00:46:38,120
Speaker 2: on board helping, but my sister in law never once

1076
00:46:38,200 --> 00:46:40,600
Speaker 2: asked anyone to help and just enjoyed her dinner. At

1077
00:46:40,600 --> 00:46:42,120
Speaker 2: the end of the night, I offered to drive sister

1078
00:46:42,160 --> 00:46:44,680
Speaker 2: in law back to the airbnb, but she refused saying

1079
00:46:44,719 --> 00:46:47,200
Speaker 2: her and the kids were staying in the house that night.

1080
00:46:47,280 --> 00:46:49,880
Speaker 2: I was very confused since all of their stuff was

1081
00:46:49,920 --> 00:46:52,720
Speaker 2: back at the airbnb. I told her my husband's family

1082
00:46:52,800 --> 00:46:55,480
Speaker 2: was staying here, that our family was at the airbnb,

1083
00:46:55,560 --> 00:46:58,440
Speaker 2: which she confirmed. Then said, yeah, but we're really tired.

1084
00:46:58,520 --> 00:46:59,760
Speaker 2: Want to stay here.

1085
00:46:59,760 --> 00:47:00,560
Speaker 1: We have to drive.

1086
00:47:00,600 --> 00:47:02,520
Speaker 2: He's getting you a freaking car.

1087
00:47:03,520 --> 00:47:07,080
Speaker 1: If the homeowner's telling you go, go, go, it's their house.

1088
00:47:07,400 --> 00:47:11,160
Speaker 2: I told her there wouldn't be space for more than

1089
00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:13,759
Speaker 2: four people, and she still didn't move. She's standing in

1090
00:47:13,800 --> 00:47:16,160
Speaker 2: her ground. My parents ended up bringing the girls back,

1091
00:47:16,200 --> 00:47:19,040
Speaker 2: but my sister in law stayed her ground on my

1092
00:47:19,120 --> 00:47:22,160
Speaker 2: couch until it was twelve thirty am. I was angry

1093
00:47:22,280 --> 00:47:24,560
Speaker 2: and exhausted. I told her she needed to go or

1094
00:47:24,600 --> 00:47:26,120
Speaker 2: I was going to call nine one one because she

1095
00:47:26,200 --> 00:47:28,640
Speaker 2: clearly was having some kind of episode of some kind.

1096
00:47:28,719 --> 00:47:30,719
Speaker 2: She still didn't butt, and I tried calling my brother

1097
00:47:30,760 --> 00:47:33,759
Speaker 2: about five or six more times before finally giving up

1098
00:47:33,800 --> 00:47:36,359
Speaker 2: and calling my parents. I was worried if I left

1099
00:47:36,360 --> 00:47:39,040
Speaker 2: her alone, she would do something. I know she's not

1100
00:47:39,080 --> 00:47:41,320
Speaker 2: acting in the most stable of ways.

1101
00:47:40,800 --> 00:47:43,200
Speaker 1: She's being like, I'm staying here.

1102
00:47:43,480 --> 00:47:46,680
Speaker 2: I don't trust that. I don't trust that that is spooky.

1103
00:47:46,800 --> 00:47:49,200
Speaker 2: My mom came over about two am and tagged me out,

1104
00:47:49,239 --> 00:47:51,560
Speaker 2: where she ended up staying up with sister in law

1105
00:47:51,600 --> 00:47:52,880
Speaker 2: for the rest of the night. The next morning, they

1106
00:47:52,880 --> 00:47:55,480
Speaker 2: were both still up and chatting over coffee. That's good,

1107
00:47:55,520 --> 00:47:57,520
Speaker 2: I guess. I asked her when my brother was coming

1108
00:47:57,520 --> 00:47:59,520
Speaker 2: to pick her up, and she just shrug and something

1109
00:47:59,640 --> 00:48:02,400
Speaker 2: in me he snapped. I yelled at her that she

1110
00:48:02,760 --> 00:48:05,879
Speaker 2: needed to go, and I didn't care how, but since

1111
00:48:05,920 --> 00:48:08,680
Speaker 2: nobody was telling me anything that was going on, I

1112
00:48:08,760 --> 00:48:11,000
Speaker 2: was going to put up with his bs any longer.

1113
00:48:11,120 --> 00:48:12,919
Speaker 2: She just said that she needed to ride. My mom

1114
00:48:12,960 --> 00:48:15,120
Speaker 2: called my dad, who brought the girls over, and he

1115
00:48:15,160 --> 00:48:16,880
Speaker 2: had to physically pick up my sister in law to

1116
00:48:16,920 --> 00:48:18,920
Speaker 2: get her out of the house. My dad ended up

1117
00:48:18,920 --> 00:48:21,160
Speaker 2: making the four hour drive to drop my sister in

1118
00:48:21,239 --> 00:48:23,000
Speaker 2: law off at home, and we kept the girls to

1119
00:48:23,040 --> 00:48:25,239
Speaker 2: make sure they were safe. My dad told me when

1120
00:48:25,239 --> 00:48:27,640
Speaker 2: he dropped off my sister in law, my brother was

1121
00:48:27,680 --> 00:48:30,279
Speaker 2: at home watching the football game and didn't seem surprised

1122
00:48:30,320 --> 00:48:32,800
Speaker 2: that she was home without the girls. My dad grabbed

1123
00:48:32,800 --> 00:48:35,279
Speaker 2: some extra clothes and toys before he left and told

1124
00:48:35,320 --> 00:48:37,560
Speaker 2: my brother to call me later. Currently, me and my

1125
00:48:37,640 --> 00:48:40,319
Speaker 2: parents are swapping with watching the kids, and my brother

1126
00:48:40,440 --> 00:48:42,920
Speaker 2: is calling me telling me how terrible I was to

1127
00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:44,920
Speaker 2: punt his wife out like that. I don't understand what

1128
00:48:44,920 --> 00:48:46,680
Speaker 2: was going on. He's going to come next weekend to

1129
00:48:46,680 --> 00:48:48,919
Speaker 2: get the girls. He still never explained why he left

1130
00:48:48,920 --> 00:48:51,080
Speaker 2: and why his wife refused to leave my house. So

1131
00:48:51,120 --> 00:48:53,840
Speaker 2: they're okay, they can't be This is weird, the brother

1132
00:48:54,360 --> 00:48:56,719
Speaker 2: unless they wanted like how dare you treat my wife

1133
00:48:56,800 --> 00:48:59,799
Speaker 2: this way? Maybe they're like guy, Maybe they're pawning off

1134
00:48:59,800 --> 00:49:01,799
Speaker 2: the kids to have like a vacation, like they're in

1135
00:49:01,880 --> 00:49:04,160
Speaker 2: on it. Maybe that's it. I don't know. It's only

1136
00:49:04,200 --> 00:49:06,600
Speaker 2: been a few days, but I feel terrible about punting

1137
00:49:06,600 --> 00:49:09,120
Speaker 2: her out in a possible crisis moment. But I felt

1138
00:49:09,120 --> 00:49:10,799
Speaker 2: like I was going crazy and didn't want to be

1139
00:49:10,840 --> 00:49:13,319
Speaker 2: responsible for her as she was already behaving a little

1140
00:49:13,400 --> 00:49:16,040
Speaker 2: radical day. Am I the a hole? There's an update?

1141
00:49:16,160 --> 00:49:18,280
Speaker 2: I feel like we need, like we need to understand

1142
00:49:18,280 --> 00:49:20,400
Speaker 2: what's going on, but no one's telling enter anyone anything,

1143
00:49:20,440 --> 00:49:21,680
Speaker 2: so like, how are you how are we going to

1144
00:49:21,719 --> 00:49:23,840
Speaker 2: help you? You know? But we got an update, So

1145
00:49:24,160 --> 00:49:26,360
Speaker 2: sorry for the lack of update. It's been wild and

1146
00:49:26,360 --> 00:49:28,680
Speaker 2: in crazy time since Thankgiving, and my family has been

1147
00:49:28,719 --> 00:49:31,520
Speaker 2: processing everything. Little background that I haven't touched on. Me

1148
00:49:31,560 --> 00:49:33,120
Speaker 2: and my brother had a falling out when he began

1149
00:49:33,239 --> 00:49:35,640
Speaker 2: dating his wife due to him finding religion and being

1150
00:49:35,680 --> 00:49:38,040
Speaker 2: convinced I was living a life of sin. I wasn't

1151
00:49:38,040 --> 00:49:40,399
Speaker 2: invited to their wedding and hadn't heard from him until

1152
00:49:40,440 --> 00:49:42,400
Speaker 2: his first daughter was born, when we sort of smoothed

1153
00:49:42,400 --> 00:49:45,120
Speaker 2: some things over. Right after Thanksgiving. We tricked my brother

1154
00:49:45,320 --> 00:49:47,319
Speaker 2: and told them the kids were at my house so

1155
00:49:47,360 --> 00:49:49,439
Speaker 2: we could come get them, but my husband had taken

1156
00:49:49,480 --> 00:49:51,640
Speaker 2: them out somewhere to enjoy themselves. While my parents and

1157
00:49:51,680 --> 00:49:56,319
Speaker 2: I held an impromptu intervention, my brother finally spilled everything

1158
00:49:56,400 --> 00:49:58,680
Speaker 2: that had happened between him and his wife. Apparently his

1159
00:49:58,719 --> 00:50:01,399
Speaker 2: wife suffers with some sort of severe mental illness. Someone

1160
00:50:01,400 --> 00:50:03,440
Speaker 2: said postpartum in the chat, you might be right and

1161
00:50:03,520 --> 00:50:06,600
Speaker 2: never told my brother. After the birth of my third niece,

1162
00:50:06,840 --> 00:50:09,080
Speaker 2: she decided she no longer wanted to take her medications

1163
00:50:09,120 --> 00:50:12,080
Speaker 2: and has been spiraling ever since. This is how my

1164
00:50:12,160 --> 00:50:14,680
Speaker 2: brother found out about the illness. I don't know all

1165
00:50:14,680 --> 00:50:17,120
Speaker 2: the details, but a few things are these. My brother

1166
00:50:17,160 --> 00:50:19,560
Speaker 2: told me she did. What she did in her spirals

1167
00:50:19,640 --> 00:50:22,840
Speaker 2: was leave him the children alone for about fifteen days

1168
00:50:22,880 --> 00:50:25,000
Speaker 2: while she found herself in the woods.

1169
00:50:25,160 --> 00:50:28,720
Speaker 1: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Well, sometimes you have to find yourself

1170
00:50:28,760 --> 00:50:31,480
Speaker 1: in the woods and other times you have to raise

1171
00:50:31,520 --> 00:50:32,080
Speaker 1: your family.

1172
00:50:32,280 --> 00:50:36,719
Speaker 2: This dude's professional help. Yeah, she spent thirteen thousand dollars

1173
00:50:36,880 --> 00:50:40,720
Speaker 2: on various plastic surgeries, all from the girl's college fund.

1174
00:50:40,800 --> 00:50:44,000
Speaker 2: Oh thought that he had swapped out their children with

1175
00:50:44,160 --> 00:50:47,399
Speaker 2: dolls because he doesn't trust her with them. What all right,

1176
00:50:47,440 --> 00:50:50,520
Speaker 2: So just like full on mental open credit cards in

1177
00:50:50,560 --> 00:50:52,920
Speaker 2: all the children's names just in case he closed them

1178
00:50:52,920 --> 00:50:55,480
Speaker 2: down right away. And apparently all these started off with

1179
00:50:55,520 --> 00:50:58,200
Speaker 2: some indication of a spiral beforehand, and my brother told

1180
00:50:58,239 --> 00:50:59,759
Speaker 2: her if she didn't try to get better, he was

1181
00:50:59,840 --> 00:51:02,120
Speaker 2: leaving her and taking the kids with him. A few

1182
00:51:02,120 --> 00:51:04,719
Speaker 2: moments before Thanksgiving, she was showing signs and my brother

1183
00:51:04,760 --> 00:51:06,799
Speaker 2: had plans to take her to a hospital. That's good,

1184
00:51:06,880 --> 00:51:09,200
Speaker 2: but she seemed to have taken a turn for the better,

1185
00:51:09,320 --> 00:51:11,879
Speaker 2: and he thought she was medicated again. However, what had

1186
00:51:11,920 --> 00:51:14,839
Speaker 2: really happened is she saw our post on Facebook about

1187
00:51:14,840 --> 00:51:17,560
Speaker 2: our new house, and she somehow convinced herself that I

1188
00:51:17,680 --> 00:51:22,160
Speaker 2: was secretly living her life right right, Okay, like My

1189
00:51:22,320 --> 00:51:25,800
Speaker 2: husband was her husband, and secretly he bought this house

1190
00:51:25,880 --> 00:51:28,040
Speaker 2: for her and him to live in. She found the

1191
00:51:28,120 --> 00:51:31,440
Speaker 2: Zilla listing, printed out pictures, and even hired an interior

1192
00:51:31,480 --> 00:51:33,839
Speaker 2: decorator start working on all the changes she was going

1193
00:51:33,880 --> 00:51:36,360
Speaker 2: to make. One of the craziest things she did was

1194
00:51:36,520 --> 00:51:39,320
Speaker 2: make a secret home renovation TikTok channel where she posted

1195
00:51:39,360 --> 00:51:42,120
Speaker 2: pictures and would pretend she was making updates to the

1196
00:51:42,200 --> 00:51:45,640
Speaker 2: home using our pictures from Facebook slash our family group chat.

1197
00:51:45,840 --> 00:51:49,000
Speaker 2: She had also photoshopped herself over me and her family pictures.

1198
00:51:49,120 --> 00:51:52,280
Speaker 1: I'm like laughing because I'm concerned. This is insane.

1199
00:51:52,440 --> 00:51:55,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, this woman needs help. This woman needs help. The

1200
00:51:55,840 --> 00:51:59,120
Speaker 2: morning of Thanksgiving, she told him that she was having

1201
00:51:59,160 --> 00:52:02,440
Speaker 2: an affair with my husband and that she was leaving

1202
00:52:02,520 --> 00:52:04,680
Speaker 2: him and moving into my home. My brother believed her

1203
00:52:04,680 --> 00:52:07,799
Speaker 2: delusion and drove home to get some space. Slash think

1204
00:52:07,880 --> 00:52:10,759
Speaker 2: everything over. Was it a smart decision to leave a

1205
00:52:10,800 --> 00:52:13,040
Speaker 2: delusional woman who thinks she owns my house in my

1206
00:52:13,080 --> 00:52:15,000
Speaker 2: home with me and my husband. No, not at all,

1207
00:52:15,120 --> 00:52:16,919
Speaker 2: But I never said my brother was a smart man.

1208
00:52:17,160 --> 00:52:19,480
Speaker 2: Her weird behavior of the entire dinner was trying to

1209
00:52:19,520 --> 00:52:22,000
Speaker 2: get closer to my husband. She would pass off the

1210
00:52:22,080 --> 00:52:24,680
Speaker 2: kids because they were trying to get between her and

1211
00:52:24,800 --> 00:52:27,560
Speaker 2: her true love. I hadn't realized it at the time,

1212
00:52:27,600 --> 00:52:29,239
Speaker 2: but she also chose to sit next to him at

1213
00:52:29,239 --> 00:52:31,760
Speaker 2: the dinner table, leaving her kids at the other side. Apparently,

1214
00:52:31,800 --> 00:52:34,200
Speaker 2: her episode of refusing not to leave was her trying

1215
00:52:34,200 --> 00:52:36,440
Speaker 2: to stay up late to get a moment alone with

1216
00:52:36,520 --> 00:52:39,280
Speaker 2: my husband. She finally realized that it wasn't going to happen,

1217
00:52:39,320 --> 00:52:41,280
Speaker 2: so she broke down on my couch. When my brother

1218
00:52:41,360 --> 00:52:44,480
Speaker 2: got home, he realized that she was having another episode.

1219
00:52:44,560 --> 00:52:47,439
Speaker 2: Now he realizes it, yeah, and it's a little too late,

1220
00:52:47,520 --> 00:52:50,480
Speaker 2: and started setting up hospital intake stuff for her, hence

1221
00:52:50,560 --> 00:52:52,960
Speaker 2: why he wasn't answering his phone. Well, my dad dropped

1222
00:52:52,960 --> 00:52:55,360
Speaker 2: my sister a law off. He told him that we

1223
00:52:55,440 --> 00:52:57,799
Speaker 2: had the girls, and my brother took that as we

1224
00:52:57,800 --> 00:53:00,440
Speaker 2: were offering care for them while all this was happening.

1225
00:53:00,480 --> 00:53:03,080
Speaker 2: That was just a miscommunication on my dad's part. He

1226
00:53:03,160 --> 00:53:05,640
Speaker 2: broke down in tears at my kitchen table, and we

1227
00:53:05,680 --> 00:53:07,719
Speaker 2: decided that my parents could take him in and we

1228
00:53:07,719 --> 00:53:09,920
Speaker 2: could temporarily take in the girls while him and his

1229
00:53:09,960 --> 00:53:12,600
Speaker 2: wife either get divorced or work through this, which shout

1230
00:53:12,640 --> 00:53:15,080
Speaker 2: out to op for taking care of the girls like

1231
00:53:15,120 --> 00:53:18,480
Speaker 2: this is a crazy stressful situation and shout out to

1232
00:53:18,480 --> 00:53:19,919
Speaker 2: op for making a little a little better.

1233
00:53:20,120 --> 00:53:24,160
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, sometimes the situations in life get a little crazy,

1234
00:53:24,880 --> 00:53:28,719
Speaker 1: but you know, as the aunt of these children, it's

1235
00:53:28,760 --> 00:53:31,560
Speaker 1: like he bears some level of responsibility and.

1236
00:53:32,440 --> 00:53:34,480
Speaker 2: Shout out you for you for taking on the mantle

1237
00:53:35,239 --> 00:53:37,360
Speaker 2: taking Either way, we're going to make a better effort

1238
00:53:37,400 --> 00:53:39,200
Speaker 2: to be my brother and Nissa's life. We've had the

1239
00:53:39,200 --> 00:53:41,480
Speaker 2: girls a little over two months now. Wow, it's been

1240
00:53:41,520 --> 00:53:43,799
Speaker 2: a sec and it's been amazing. I'm so happy they

1241
00:53:43,800 --> 00:53:46,360
Speaker 2: are in our lives again, even if it's only temporary.

1242
00:53:46,560 --> 00:53:49,600
Speaker 2: I've seen a genuine change in my brother since separation

1243
00:53:49,680 --> 00:53:51,520
Speaker 2: between him and his wife, and it's one hundred percent

1244
00:53:51,560 --> 00:53:54,120
Speaker 2: been for the better. Okay, this is what happens when

1245
00:53:54,120 --> 00:53:56,600
Speaker 2: a family unites to solve a problem instead of just

1246
00:53:56,680 --> 00:53:59,560
Speaker 2: cutting people out right right, he seems less stress and

1247
00:53:59,600 --> 00:54:01,880
Speaker 2: comes to dinner every night with us and the girls.

1248
00:54:01,880 --> 00:54:04,000
Speaker 2: By the way, you can listen to full episodes with

1249
00:54:04,120 --> 00:54:06,440
Speaker 2: stories just like this. Go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or

1250
00:54:06,480 --> 00:54:09,000
Speaker 2: your favorite podcast app and search. Okay, story time, there's

1251
00:54:09,000 --> 00:54:11,760
Speaker 2: another relevant update. He has visit his wife a few times. However,

1252
00:54:11,800 --> 00:54:14,000
Speaker 2: I haven't heard much about her during this time, but

1253
00:54:14,040 --> 00:54:17,040
Speaker 2: he seems to be leaning towards a divorce and moving

1254
00:54:17,080 --> 00:54:19,279
Speaker 2: back closer to me and her parents, which I think

1255
00:54:19,320 --> 00:54:21,760
Speaker 2: would be a welcome to change. It's been a weird

1256
00:54:21,800 --> 00:54:24,080
Speaker 2: couple of months and I'm just glad things are finally

1257
00:54:24,120 --> 00:54:30,000
Speaker 2: getting back in place. That is where this story ends. Hey,

1258
00:54:30,120 --> 00:54:31,840
Speaker 2: it's Sam. We'll go get back to the stories. But

1259
00:54:31,920 --> 00:54:33,680
Speaker 2: here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

1260
00:54:34,960 --> 00:54:38,480
Speaker 1: My sister in law offered to adopt my baby because

1261
00:54:38,680 --> 00:54:40,640
Speaker 1: they don't think I'm mentally fit.

1262
00:54:40,920 --> 00:54:41,960
Speaker 4: Maybe you should think about it.

1263
00:54:42,680 --> 00:54:46,120
Speaker 1: I twenty eight female, and my husband twenty seven male,

1264
00:54:46,320 --> 00:54:50,080
Speaker 1: have been married for three years and have two beautiful babies,

1265
00:54:50,200 --> 00:54:53,239
Speaker 1: A who's twenty months female and B who's four months man.

1266
00:54:53,920 --> 00:54:57,120
Speaker 1: Name of them Amanda and Bradley. Our babies are roughly

1267
00:54:57,200 --> 00:55:00,760
Speaker 1: sixteen months apart, and I wouldn't change that for the However,

1268
00:55:00,880 --> 00:55:03,640
Speaker 1: motherhood this time around has been very difficult, leading to

1269
00:55:03,640 --> 00:55:06,160
Speaker 1: postpartum depression and anxiety. And by the way, this comes

1270
00:55:06,160 --> 00:55:09,360
Speaker 1: from user Real Childhood ninety three forty two from the

1271
00:55:09,480 --> 00:55:12,120
Speaker 1: r slash Okay storytime. Subprend it and if you want

1272
00:55:12,120 --> 00:55:15,000
Speaker 1: to submit your own stories go submit them there. I

1273
00:55:15,120 --> 00:55:17,560
Speaker 1: had brushed it off for a couple of months, thinking

1274
00:55:17,640 --> 00:55:19,680
Speaker 1: I just needed to get into a routine and that

1275
00:55:19,760 --> 00:55:21,800
Speaker 1: everything would be fun. But I came to my senses

1276
00:55:21,840 --> 00:55:24,160
Speaker 1: a few weeks ago that something was wrong and I

1277
00:55:24,239 --> 00:55:26,879
Speaker 1: needed help. I could feel myself going into a dark

1278
00:55:26,920 --> 00:55:29,640
Speaker 1: hole and I wanted out. I told my husband and

1279
00:55:29,680 --> 00:55:32,399
Speaker 1: he agreed we needed a game plan. We called my mom,

1280
00:55:32,480 --> 00:55:35,240
Speaker 1: who lives in a different state, a six hour flight away,

1281
00:55:35,320 --> 00:55:38,640
Speaker 1: and she immediately came to the rescue. My whole family did. Actually,

1282
00:55:38,680 --> 00:55:41,719
Speaker 1: my brother's fiance, who we will call Stacey, came for

1283
00:55:41,760 --> 00:55:44,200
Speaker 1: a few days to visit and be a piece of

1284
00:55:44,280 --> 00:55:47,000
Speaker 1: home that I needed. While she was here, my husband

1285
00:55:47,000 --> 00:55:49,640
Speaker 1: and my mom talked and agreed that Bradley would go

1286
00:55:49,760 --> 00:55:52,200
Speaker 1: stay with her and my dad for a few weeks

1287
00:55:52,239 --> 00:55:54,680
Speaker 1: while I got the help I needed. Here's where things

1288
00:55:54,719 --> 00:55:57,400
Speaker 1: got messy. My mother in law invited Stacy and me

1289
00:55:57,640 --> 00:56:00,000
Speaker 1: over for dinner, and just the thought of telling them

1290
00:56:00,080 --> 00:56:03,160
Speaker 1: that Bradley was going to my parents gave me anxiety.

1291
00:56:03,719 --> 00:56:06,560
Speaker 1: When we got there, I just decided to bite the bullet.

1292
00:56:06,600 --> 00:56:10,040
Speaker 1: I told mother in law, Hey, Bradley is a little traveler.

1293
00:56:10,120 --> 00:56:12,360
Speaker 1: He's going to my parents tomorrow. The look on her

1294
00:56:12,440 --> 00:56:16,600
Speaker 1: face was very unpleasant. Why why? Why? Was all she said.

1295
00:56:16,640 --> 00:56:19,200
Speaker 1: That's all she said, Not like why. I'm not the

1296
00:56:19,239 --> 00:56:22,400
Speaker 1: one to tell people my problems unless they really want

1297
00:56:22,440 --> 00:56:24,600
Speaker 1: to know, which is ironic, right, since I'm here on

1298
00:56:24,640 --> 00:56:27,800
Speaker 1: Reddit telling my problems. So I told her long story short,

1299
00:56:27,840 --> 00:56:31,279
Speaker 1: my postpartum depression and anxiety have gotten really bad. All

1300
00:56:31,320 --> 00:56:34,080
Speaker 1: she said back was that's life and continued to play

1301
00:56:34,239 --> 00:56:37,480
Speaker 1: with Amanda. Right. I immediately wanted to leave, but I

1302
00:56:37,560 --> 00:56:40,000
Speaker 1: knew she would be even more upset since Bradley was

1303
00:56:40,080 --> 00:56:41,960
Speaker 1: leaving the next day. We went into the living room

1304
00:56:41,960 --> 00:56:44,160
Speaker 1: and she said, you better text sister in law because

1305
00:56:44,200 --> 00:56:46,520
Speaker 1: she's going to be pissed. So I did just that,

1306
00:56:46,680 --> 00:56:49,160
Speaker 1: and of course sister in law was not happy. Sister

1307
00:56:49,200 --> 00:56:52,920
Speaker 1: in law question whether Stacy, my brother's fiance, was capable

1308
00:56:53,040 --> 00:56:55,759
Speaker 1: of taking care of Bradley on a plane, which she

1309
00:56:55,840 --> 00:56:58,520
Speaker 1: one thousand percent is. She's traveled with her nieces and

1310
00:56:58,560 --> 00:57:01,000
Speaker 1: nephew since they were infants, but that's beside the point.

1311
00:57:01,040 --> 00:57:03,399
Speaker 1: Sister in law then said she wasn't coming to mother

1312
00:57:03,440 --> 00:57:05,600
Speaker 1: in law's house and that was that. I thought it

1313
00:57:05,719 --> 00:57:07,440
Speaker 1: was over and went on with the night, we had

1314
00:57:07,440 --> 00:57:09,279
Speaker 1: dinner and mother in law was talking to me like

1315
00:57:09,400 --> 00:57:11,680
Speaker 1: nothing was wrong. She was telling stories and jokes and

1316
00:57:11,719 --> 00:57:14,000
Speaker 1: we were having a great time, or so I thought.

1317
00:57:14,200 --> 00:57:17,080
Speaker 1: Then my husband's aunt came over to mother in law's house,

1318
00:57:17,120 --> 00:57:19,240
Speaker 1: and I thought to myself, this is perfect. She had

1319
00:57:19,240 --> 00:57:21,640
Speaker 1: gone through postpartum depression, and I knew I could talk

1320
00:57:21,640 --> 00:57:23,560
Speaker 1: to her about it to see what she thought I

1321
00:57:23,600 --> 00:57:26,560
Speaker 1: should do to help myself. My husband showed up shortly after,

1322
00:57:26,760 --> 00:57:29,800
Speaker 1: since he had work, and again everything seemed fine.

1323
00:57:30,000 --> 00:57:32,960
Speaker 4: The cards are the stars are lining up. Yeah, it's

1324
00:57:32,960 --> 00:57:35,680
Speaker 4: like everything's good. You're gonna be like, you know, relate

1325
00:57:35,760 --> 00:57:37,200
Speaker 4: to some people about this stuff.

1326
00:57:37,320 --> 00:57:39,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, how is this gonna go off the rails?

1327
00:57:39,560 --> 00:57:39,720
Speaker 3: Is it?

1328
00:57:39,760 --> 00:57:41,520
Speaker 1: Sister in law? Sister in law's gonna show up and

1329
00:57:41,600 --> 00:57:43,800
Speaker 1: ruin everything. Shut your mouth, sister in law.

1330
00:57:43,600 --> 00:57:45,800
Speaker 4: You don't have anything to do with this, sister in law.

1331
00:57:46,600 --> 00:57:48,880
Speaker 1: All of the sudden, my sister in law and her

1332
00:57:49,000 --> 00:57:51,560
Speaker 1: husband walked through the door. She said hi to everyone

1333
00:57:51,760 --> 00:57:53,680
Speaker 1: except me, though I had a feeling that would have

1334
00:57:53,720 --> 00:57:56,400
Speaker 1: happened anyway. I went outside to talk to my husband's

1335
00:57:56,400 --> 00:57:58,760
Speaker 1: aunt and it was the best conversation I could have had.

1336
00:57:58,880 --> 00:58:02,000
Speaker 1: I broke down and completely opened up to her. Hearing

1337
00:58:02,040 --> 00:58:04,120
Speaker 1: that I was doing the right thing by taking the

1338
00:58:04,120 --> 00:58:06,920
Speaker 1: first steps to getting help made me feel good. During

1339
00:58:06,960 --> 00:58:09,640
Speaker 1: this conversation, my sister in law left the house, and

1340
00:58:09,680 --> 00:58:11,440
Speaker 1: at that point I was ready to go home too.

1341
00:58:11,600 --> 00:58:14,680
Speaker 1: It was roughly nine pm. As I was composing myself

1342
00:58:14,720 --> 00:58:17,160
Speaker 1: before going back into the house, I got a call

1343
00:58:17,200 --> 00:58:18,120
Speaker 1: from sister in law.

1344
00:58:18,200 --> 00:58:18,880
Speaker 2: She said she.

1345
00:58:18,880 --> 00:58:20,800
Speaker 1: Wanted to talk to me, and I saw their truck

1346
00:58:20,840 --> 00:58:23,000
Speaker 1: pull up. Her husband walked into the house and I

1347
00:58:23,040 --> 00:58:25,360
Speaker 1: went to sit with her in the car. She started

1348
00:58:25,400 --> 00:58:28,280
Speaker 1: asking all these questions, why didn't you call me? Why

1349
00:58:28,320 --> 00:58:30,880
Speaker 1: not mention this sooner? How serious is this? And I

1350
00:58:31,000 --> 00:58:33,360
Speaker 1: broke down crying again. I told her everything. The reason

1351
00:58:33,440 --> 00:58:35,440
Speaker 1: I didn't tell sister in law or mother in law

1352
00:58:35,480 --> 00:58:37,840
Speaker 1: any of this at first was because I didn't realize

1353
00:58:37,960 --> 00:58:40,600
Speaker 1: it was this bad until now. Plus they were on

1354
00:58:40,720 --> 00:58:42,720
Speaker 1: vacation and I didn't want to ruin it.

1355
00:58:42,800 --> 00:58:45,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, it seems like you're going through a mind filled

1356
00:58:45,800 --> 00:58:48,520
Speaker 4: within your own mind. You don't know what steps to take.

1357
00:58:48,640 --> 00:58:50,800
Speaker 4: You got some a little bit of clarity, and now

1358
00:58:50,800 --> 00:58:54,480
Speaker 4: everyone's coming back at you saying I didn't you too,

1359
00:58:54,640 --> 00:58:56,600
Speaker 4: x y Z And you're just trying to be considerate

1360
00:58:56,720 --> 00:58:57,360
Speaker 4: right stuff.

1361
00:58:57,400 --> 00:59:00,080
Speaker 1: After I told her everything, sister in law told me

1362
00:59:00,160 --> 00:59:03,200
Speaker 1: that she kind of understands now, but is still upset

1363
00:59:03,240 --> 00:59:05,760
Speaker 1: that I didn't come to them. Okay, that doesn't matter

1364
00:59:05,800 --> 00:59:08,280
Speaker 1: at all. Then she dropped a bomb. She said, well,

1365
00:59:08,440 --> 00:59:12,520
Speaker 1: my husband and I will gladly adopt Bradley. I froze.

1366
00:59:12,600 --> 00:59:15,240
Speaker 1: This isn't a case of me not wanting or loving

1367
00:59:15,280 --> 00:59:17,800
Speaker 1: my son. This is me not having the support or

1368
00:59:17,960 --> 00:59:20,919
Speaker 1: help I need when I need it. My family would

1369
00:59:20,960 --> 00:59:24,320
Speaker 1: love to help, but they live a six hour flight away.

1370
00:59:24,480 --> 00:59:27,400
Speaker 1: All I have is my husband's family, who only help

1371
00:59:27,520 --> 00:59:29,960
Speaker 1: when it's convenient for them. At this point, it was

1372
00:59:30,000 --> 00:59:32,240
Speaker 1: one am and my husband came to the car and

1373
00:59:32,280 --> 00:59:34,320
Speaker 1: told me we needed to go home. I could tell

1374
00:59:34,480 --> 00:59:36,680
Speaker 1: something was wrong, so he must have spoken with his mom.

1375
00:59:36,720 --> 00:59:38,720
Speaker 1: We went back inside to get my stuff, and again

1376
00:59:38,880 --> 00:59:41,240
Speaker 1: mother in law was talking to me like everything was okay,

1377
00:59:41,360 --> 00:59:44,080
Speaker 1: as if I hadn't just been questioned and lectured for

1378
00:59:44,280 --> 00:59:47,400
Speaker 1: four hours. We went back home and my husband told

1379
00:59:47,440 --> 00:59:49,200
Speaker 1: me that he talked to his mom. At the end

1380
00:59:49,240 --> 00:59:51,960
Speaker 1: of the day, we are the parents and we're just

1381
00:59:52,040 --> 00:59:55,080
Speaker 1: trying to get me help. Right now, he's not talking

1382
00:59:55,080 --> 00:59:58,840
Speaker 1: to his mom Stacy brother's fiance did end up taking

1383
00:59:58,880 --> 01:00:02,120
Speaker 1: Bradley with her to my parents and they are loving

1384
01:00:02,200 --> 01:00:05,000
Speaker 1: having their grand baby with them. He is being spoiled

1385
01:00:05,080 --> 01:00:07,800
Speaker 1: and love. I am currently getting help with therapy and

1386
01:00:07,880 --> 01:00:10,200
Speaker 1: I can feel myself climbing my way out of this hole,

1387
01:00:10,240 --> 01:00:13,080
Speaker 1: which is great since my son comes back home soon. Now.

1388
01:00:13,120 --> 01:00:15,240
Speaker 1: It's been two weeks since I've talked to mother in

1389
01:00:15,320 --> 01:00:17,080
Speaker 1: law and sister in law and I don't plan on

1390
01:00:17,160 --> 01:00:19,560
Speaker 1: it anytime soon. They haven't checked up on me or

1391
01:00:19,680 --> 01:00:21,560
Speaker 1: asked if I'm okay, so I feel like they just

1392
01:00:21,720 --> 01:00:24,760
Speaker 1: don't care, which yeah, sounds about right.

1393
01:00:25,000 --> 01:00:25,560
Speaker 5: Yeah?

1394
01:00:25,600 --> 01:00:28,080
Speaker 1: How are they not checking in just to check in? Dude?

1395
01:00:28,320 --> 01:00:29,240
Speaker 4: Do a little check in?

1396
01:00:29,560 --> 01:00:29,640
Speaker 5: Like?

1397
01:00:29,760 --> 01:00:30,560
Speaker 4: How hard is that?

1398
01:00:30,680 --> 01:00:33,600
Speaker 1: However, I feel like if I go no contact that

1399
01:00:33,640 --> 01:00:36,240
Speaker 1: wouldn't be fair to my babies since they wouldn't see

1400
01:00:36,280 --> 01:00:38,720
Speaker 1: them unless my husband takes them. I don't know what

1401
01:00:38,840 --> 01:00:42,400
Speaker 1: to do, but I'm also still so hurt, and we

1402
01:00:42,440 --> 01:00:44,840
Speaker 1: would also be so hurt if you didn't listen to

1403
01:00:45,000 --> 01:00:48,680
Speaker 1: full episodes of stories like this on your podcast platform

1404
01:00:48,720 --> 01:00:52,200
Speaker 1: of choice, be that iHeartRadio or Spotify or Apple podcasts

1405
01:00:52,240 --> 01:00:54,760
Speaker 1: wherever you listen, just search Okay story Time and you've

1406
01:00:54,800 --> 01:00:58,320
Speaker 1: got twelve hundred hours of stories to listen to Boom,

1407
01:00:58,440 --> 01:01:01,640
Speaker 1: so it's best to get started sooner than later. Yeah,

1408
01:01:01,720 --> 01:01:03,960
Speaker 1: before we get into comments, Riley like, would you go

1409
01:01:04,040 --> 01:01:04,600
Speaker 1: no contact?

1410
01:01:04,720 --> 01:01:07,280
Speaker 4: I'm going no contact with sister in law because she

1411
01:01:07,360 --> 01:01:10,400
Speaker 4: has one no respect for my feelings or where I

1412
01:01:10,440 --> 01:01:13,440
Speaker 4: am as a human too. Mother in law, I mean,

1413
01:01:13,640 --> 01:01:15,080
Speaker 4: what was your vibe on the mother in law? I

1414
01:01:15,120 --> 01:01:16,600
Speaker 4: don't know, like mother in law is.

1415
01:01:16,920 --> 01:01:19,320
Speaker 1: I mean, it's definitely like she that was cold where

1416
01:01:19,360 --> 01:01:21,080
Speaker 1: it's like, Okay, I'm going to open up to you

1417
01:01:21,120 --> 01:01:23,720
Speaker 1: about the postpartum depression and anxiety I'm going through and

1418
01:01:23,760 --> 01:01:25,800
Speaker 1: it's worse this time I went through the first time,

1419
01:01:25,840 --> 01:01:28,720
Speaker 1: it's worse now. And then she goes, that's life. Mother

1420
01:01:28,720 --> 01:01:32,320
Speaker 1: in law really though, right said? Mother in law said

1421
01:01:32,320 --> 01:01:36,840
Speaker 1: that sister in law showed up later and made everything worse.

1422
01:01:37,680 --> 01:01:39,760
Speaker 4: I don't know i'd be. I mean, you need help

1423
01:01:40,080 --> 01:01:42,080
Speaker 4: at this point because you're looking towards mother in law.

1424
01:01:42,680 --> 01:01:43,120
Speaker 2: Sticky.

1425
01:01:43,360 --> 01:01:44,240
Speaker 4: This is real sticky.

1426
01:01:44,440 --> 01:01:47,400
Speaker 1: Yeah. So here's a different angle to view from comment

1427
01:01:47,480 --> 01:01:49,720
Speaker 1: number one. Here, clearly mother in law and sister in

1428
01:01:49,840 --> 01:01:52,840
Speaker 1: law were still only ever concerned about what they wanted

1429
01:01:52,960 --> 01:01:55,280
Speaker 1: or believed did they ever talk about how much they

1430
01:01:55,360 --> 01:01:58,160
Speaker 1: love all of you and simply want the best outcome

1431
01:01:58,240 --> 01:02:00,640
Speaker 1: for your family? Did they ever take interest in how

1432
01:02:00,640 --> 01:02:03,840
Speaker 1: you were doing before this? Clearly mother in law didn't ask.

1433
01:02:03,920 --> 01:02:06,080
Speaker 1: But did sister in law ask if there was anything

1434
01:02:06,080 --> 01:02:08,400
Speaker 1: she could do to help you or your husband? Volunteer

1435
01:02:08,480 --> 01:02:11,120
Speaker 1: to prepare some meals to bring over, suggest she could

1436
01:02:11,120 --> 01:02:13,280
Speaker 1: take Amanda to the park a couple of times per

1437
01:02:13,360 --> 01:02:15,760
Speaker 1: week to give you a breath. In short, did they

1438
01:02:15,840 --> 01:02:19,000
Speaker 1: ever think about what your family needs? They didn't. This

1439
01:02:19,240 --> 01:02:21,919
Speaker 1: wasn't about helping you. It was just about what they

1440
01:02:22,000 --> 01:02:24,600
Speaker 1: wanted and how they felt and what they needed and

1441
01:02:24,640 --> 01:02:28,320
Speaker 1: what their opinions were. Now, ask yourself and your husband

1442
01:02:28,400 --> 01:02:30,720
Speaker 1: if you want to put your child in that environment.

1443
01:02:30,880 --> 01:02:34,520
Speaker 1: Mother in law's behavior hasn't changed since you raised her children.

1444
01:02:34,560 --> 01:02:37,520
Speaker 1: So if your husband finds his upbringing and then double

1445
01:02:37,640 --> 01:02:40,440
Speaker 1: the psycho because sister in law and he feels like

1446
01:02:40,600 --> 01:02:42,120
Speaker 1: that is acceptable.

1447
01:02:41,600 --> 01:02:43,560
Speaker 4: And then double the psycho because of sister in law,

1448
01:02:43,720 --> 01:02:45,160
Speaker 4: Like like, if you think it was a messache because

1449
01:02:45,160 --> 01:02:46,280
Speaker 4: your mom raised.

1450
01:02:45,960 --> 01:02:49,920
Speaker 1: You, right, then right, So if he's okay with that, Okay,

1451
01:02:50,000 --> 01:02:52,480
Speaker 1: we'll just know that ninety nine percent of the time

1452
01:02:52,640 --> 01:02:54,600
Speaker 1: that husband spends with them, he will be doing it

1453
01:02:54,640 --> 01:02:56,960
Speaker 1: on his own and their contact with your children will

1454
01:02:56,960 --> 01:03:00,000
Speaker 1: be limited so that their effects on your children are limited.

1455
01:03:00,080 --> 01:03:02,440
Speaker 1: Congrats to you on getting the help you need. As

1456
01:03:02,560 --> 01:03:05,919
Speaker 1: new mothers, we are taught babies first, but if mom

1457
01:03:06,000 --> 01:03:08,680
Speaker 1: isn't healthy, no one in the house is healthy. And

1458
01:03:08,720 --> 01:03:10,600
Speaker 1: there's a reply to this that says, I'm totally in

1459
01:03:10,640 --> 01:03:11,960
Speaker 1: agreement with your comment.

1460
01:03:12,080 --> 01:03:12,160
Speaker 8: Yo.

1461
01:03:12,680 --> 01:03:15,520
Speaker 1: No matter who someone is in your life, they need

1462
01:03:15,560 --> 01:03:18,760
Speaker 1: to learn to respect you. It doesn't cost anything. It's

1463
01:03:18,840 --> 01:03:22,120
Speaker 1: little to no effort, especially when you're being genuine to

1464
01:03:22,120 --> 01:03:25,560
Speaker 1: be a decent human being here on planet Earth, which

1465
01:03:25,640 --> 01:03:28,080
Speaker 1: is not the way. Will Smith said that in Independence Day,

1466
01:03:28,200 --> 01:03:30,240
Speaker 1: a lot of people think that it's like a Berenstein

1467
01:03:30,320 --> 01:03:33,440
Speaker 1: Berenstein bear situation. You've seen Independence Day. We're gonna get

1468
01:03:33,440 --> 01:03:36,760
Speaker 1: back into the story. Yet peeps put so much more

1469
01:03:36,880 --> 01:03:41,000
Speaker 1: effort and take such nonsensical actions to always go so

1470
01:03:41,240 --> 01:03:43,360
Speaker 1: out of their way to create chaos and mayhem to

1471
01:03:43,440 --> 01:03:47,080
Speaker 1: other people. All peeps need to feel loved and appreciated,

1472
01:03:47,160 --> 01:03:50,120
Speaker 1: respected and cared for and thought of fondly. I'm sorry

1473
01:03:50,120 --> 01:03:52,520
Speaker 1: you're going through this. Your in laws don't sound like

1474
01:03:52,600 --> 01:03:55,440
Speaker 1: good peeps, But the main person I am ninety degrees

1475
01:03:55,480 --> 01:03:58,760
Speaker 1: hot with is your husband? Why isn't he doing more

1476
01:03:58,800 --> 01:04:02,200
Speaker 1: to make sure your needs are met and respected? And

1477
01:04:02,320 --> 01:04:03,960
Speaker 1: you need to feel respected as well.

1478
01:04:04,000 --> 01:04:05,960
Speaker 3: I gotta talk to whoever this person is?

1479
01:04:05,960 --> 01:04:08,320
Speaker 1: Who talk to some peeps? Dude, they're straight up from

1480
01:04:08,360 --> 01:04:12,680
Speaker 1: the nineties ninety eight degrees PEPs. Hey, who is this?

1481
01:04:13,760 --> 01:04:14,760
Speaker 2: Quoting? Who is this?

1482
01:04:14,840 --> 01:04:14,920
Speaker 5: Is?

1483
01:04:14,920 --> 01:04:17,560
Speaker 1: A person who is completely their own person? And are

1484
01:04:17,640 --> 01:04:20,240
Speaker 1: their comfort friends with this person? Yeah, a husband is

1485
01:04:20,240 --> 01:04:22,800
Speaker 1: supposed to love his wife, be protective of and to

1486
01:04:23,320 --> 01:04:26,600
Speaker 1: and for his wife, loving to his wife, caring for

1487
01:04:26,640 --> 01:04:28,720
Speaker 1: his wife, respectful to hers. But okay, you're supposed to

1488
01:04:28,760 --> 01:04:30,960
Speaker 1: be good advocate and care for her if she's unable

1489
01:04:31,000 --> 01:04:33,320
Speaker 1: to do so herself, fulfill his commitments, and be there

1490
01:04:33,320 --> 01:04:35,800
Speaker 1: for her in all ways. This also applies to and

1491
01:04:35,840 --> 01:04:38,440
Speaker 1: for his care of any children that they may have together.

1492
01:04:38,480 --> 01:04:41,040
Speaker 1: It doesn't sound like he is fulfilling his role. I

1493
01:04:41,080 --> 01:04:43,200
Speaker 1: felt it was important to also add that what I've

1494
01:04:43,200 --> 01:04:46,320
Speaker 1: posted here also applies to a wife. Just swap the pronouns,

1495
01:04:46,320 --> 01:04:48,160
Speaker 1: because I don't know how peeps can be about a

1496
01:04:48,160 --> 01:04:50,880
Speaker 1: subject like this. Words from a wife of eighteen years

1497
01:04:50,880 --> 01:04:53,400
Speaker 1: this year, wishing you the best of luck with this

1498
01:04:53,520 --> 01:04:56,400
Speaker 1: and hope your husband gets his ish all the way together.

1499
01:04:56,920 --> 01:04:58,640
Speaker 1: And that is the story. And I guess, yeah, it

1500
01:04:58,680 --> 01:05:01,280
Speaker 1: is true. In this situation. Who's taking point?

1501
01:05:01,520 --> 01:05:02,840
Speaker 4: The husband?

1502
01:05:03,120 --> 01:05:06,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, there we go, husband, husband's taking point on fixing

1503
01:05:06,680 --> 01:05:07,320
Speaker 1: the in laws.

1504
01:05:07,440 --> 01:05:09,840
Speaker 4: I am pretty confused. We didn't hear much about him.

1505
01:05:09,920 --> 01:05:12,560
Speaker 1: I mean, he seemed genuinely like he had the conversation

1506
01:05:12,640 --> 01:05:14,680
Speaker 1: with his mom. I think they got they they were

1507
01:05:14,720 --> 01:05:16,800
Speaker 1: getting ambushed at the same time sister in law is

1508
01:05:16,840 --> 01:05:19,680
Speaker 1: ambushing him or ambushing ope in the car, and then

1509
01:05:19,720 --> 01:05:22,560
Speaker 1: inside he's trying to talk to his mom and they

1510
01:05:22,640 --> 01:05:24,960
Speaker 1: both were like, dude, this is this is terrible that

1511
01:05:25,160 --> 01:05:28,960
Speaker 1: previously the last four hours, let's go and he was

1512
01:05:29,040 --> 01:05:31,520
Speaker 1: no longer talking with his mom, probably about like the

1513
01:05:31,600 --> 01:05:34,600
Speaker 1: kid's situation or the fit whatever. So but if anything

1514
01:05:34,640 --> 01:05:36,560
Speaker 1: is gonna get fixed, the one taking point needs to

1515
01:05:36,560 --> 01:05:39,360
Speaker 1: be the person who's directly related to these people and

1516
01:05:39,560 --> 01:05:43,080
Speaker 1: not the their essentially their their daughter in law exa.

1517
01:05:44,160 --> 01:05:48,760
Speaker 1: So yeah, take point, be man, take charge. A lot

1518
01:05:48,760 --> 01:05:50,920
Speaker 1: of people hate that phrase now, but I feel like

1519
01:05:51,040 --> 01:05:53,000
Speaker 1: it's like it is what it is. Man. You have

1520
01:05:53,080 --> 01:05:55,440
Speaker 1: to you have to your your your your wife is

1521
01:05:55,680 --> 01:05:58,680
Speaker 1: in postpartum depression. Like going through a lot. She does

1522
01:05:58,720 --> 01:06:00,440
Speaker 1: not need to take point on this situation.

1523
01:06:00,560 --> 01:06:02,640
Speaker 4: You do, you gotta you gotta do what you gotta do.

1524
01:06:02,720 --> 01:06:04,240
Speaker 4: Man be husband, husband up.

1525
01:06:04,480 --> 01:06:06,600
Speaker 1: But that is the end of that story.